#this is obviously bullshit

[lokisgoodgirl]

The people need to know!!! 🤭

You've forced my hand and I...okay. *clears throat*

Since you so graciously provided a screenshot from our chat...I shall illustrate with the same 🤣

So I have this very unsubstantiated and yet...un-disprovable theorum that when Loki is ripped through past/future, he has a massive orgasm.

Or, as you helpfully quoted from my voice note on the phenomenon :

Now this method of acting does have precedent, and I feel like TC and TH graduated from the same school of acting as sexual weaponry. Timothee Chalamet, my second tier boyfriend, is quoted somewhere as saying his influence for the Gom Jabbar scene in Dune (2021) was that Paul transformed from being in agony...to an orgasmic trance where he harnessed the pain (I'm paraphrasing but that was the jist)

Back to Loki, this theory is also substantiated by the Timejump Tentpole™️ which some of you are now familiar with.

Now I'm not SAYING that the breathlessness and fucked-out energy that Loki presents every time he stumbles his exsemenginated ass through time and space is because his body is richoeting between climax and death but that's also exactly what I'm saying. And no one can convince me otherwise.

@lokischambermaid I hope you're happy🤣

🔔🔔@xorpsbane @gigglingtiggerv2 @glitchquake @acidcasualties @thedistractedagglomeration @peachyjinx @november-rayne @goddessofwonderland @holdmytesseract @simplyholl @ijuststareatstuffhereok89 @muddyorbs @joyful-enchantress @mochie85 @coldnique @maple-seed 🤷‍♀️

[radiance1]

Danny has been reincarnated.

Which was an odd thing to realize, it wasn't even a slow one he just... snapped into it one day. One moment he was staring at a wall out of boredom the next, well, he was staring for an entirely different reason.

It was a task for his now young -he thinks around three years old?- mind to work its way through the memories, but it wasn't like he had much else to do honestly. So, what does he know?

His name is Danny, like, his actual name and not just a moniker. He was once a halfa and he already knows he's going to be missing invisibility and intangibility. He, well, died. For like, a second time which actually makes sense because reincarnation-

Anyways.

He was a clone of two people from this thing called the Justice League which, weird name but probably some government or activist group. Wonder Woman and Superman. Which were pretty weird names to name your kids but eh.

He doesn't really remember much besides that from this life, or the one from before but he's an adult! He'll figure things out once he gets out of this containment tube thing.

Did he mention he was in a test tube? He's a tube baby now. He thinks? Or maybe it's more like he's being contained.

Whatever.

So he breaks out. Thank you apparent superstrength that he has no idea why he has but he's not going to complain! He then wandered around all of the other test tubes, able to remember just enough of English to see that yea, they're dead.

He probably was too, before he had memories zapped into him. Or a vegetable.

He then finds this really big container, checks it out, then opens it because the clone inside isn't dead!

'Project Match' it said. He'll just call him Match.

Was he thanked for helping him? Nope. You would think that he would be thanked or at least somewhat respected for saving this guy but nope!

He was, quite literally, held up by his leg and dangled in the air. Who dangles a three-year-old?! Well, he was technically and adult but still! The next few things were a blur but after pulling off the old Fenton charm he found him and Match outside as he tried to stop him from attacking random people.

Luckily the charms and privilege of the youngest (he's assuming he's the youngest, because he's physically three) was more than enough to get through to him. Sure, the guy couldn't form words, really aggressive for literally no reason, really weird but also absolutely cool looking eyes. But he worked around the first issue by developing their own personal language from like grunts and stuff, the second he once again used his youngest privilege to boss him around and the third a pair of sunglasses easily fixed.

He just had to steer Match clear of those random S crest mark thingies. Which was a weird thing to hate but hey, he's not there to judge.

[emacrow]

Clockwork was in the middle of mentoring Danny about his Duty as High King leading him by his shoulders before he felt a awful core wrenching pain before he quite literally pulled through the afterlife and back into the living. Pt 1

Now Clockwork haven't been alive for an awful Long Long time since he was beaten and killed by his Children during his madness phase, so suddenly awakening in a sacrificial alter, the feeling of gravity weighing him down, eyes blurring, ears ringing with a loud noise that kept going badump ba dump as he was experiencing what possible the worst tremendous sensitivity overload of being brought back from the very dead and into brand new mortal flesh.

The Justice League and dark Justice were in the middle of stopping the forbidden ritual from some crazed Cultists who somehow found the skull, some of wonder women's blood, ancient artifacts of time belonging Kronos could only stood frozen in shock to see in horror and a bit of mesmerized fascination.

As the skull began to glow a ominous greenish blue glow of Magic form by blood then bones, muscle then flesh with very very long blonde hair that kept going down while the rest began quickly making a neck, a chest, arms, and the rest of the remaining of the naked body.

What the cultists didn't expect at all was Kronos's new body was a women due to the misread of a certain someone who thought the blood of the main head descendants of Greek meant wonder women and not a male descendants. Along with a much more different oopsy was the gasping little naked toddler that was looking wide eyed gasping heavily at the suddenly drag along as he being held tightly by the now Female Kronos's arms.

>> part 2

[goddisposez]

x

[hellsite-hall-of-fame]

I mean, you're obviously President Barack Obama, right?

well obviously

also can everyone stop stealing my shoelaces now >:(

/j

[brutally-loving]

"I'm normal about my friends and their selfships!!!" Said the stupid bitchass liar

[shreddeddescent]

sometimes your brother getting bigger is actually a blessing in disguise

[alexwilltellyouthings]

Rant (Thought About Edwin Payne Too Much Again):

Edwin may be the best one out of the main four in regards to dealing with his own anger. Isn't that something?

I mean, Crystal is constantly angry and letting it out in ways that hurt others or even herself. Niko gets angry at love and herself and thinks changing her whole personality is the answer instead of facing what she did wrong. Charles, well, duh.

But Edwin. We see him get worked up on episode one until he breaks down, says everything he needs about how the cases matter to him, and accepts the comfort that comes afterwards. From then on I think we don't see him get mad for a good while.

He gets annoyed of course, all the time, but that's just him. Anger, though? I can only remember the second instance being with the Cat King in the forest, shoving the bracelet in his face. Which he was brilliant to do, had every right to, stood up for himself and left.

He takes the anger when it comes, does something about it and lets it go. Something no one else seems to have learned how to do.

In conclusion: Edwin Payne, somehow the emotional role model of this fucked up little group

[iamtheunicornwizard]

they're so cute frfr

[art-from-the-juice-box]

wonderlust stuff :]

[feralnumberfive]

Another thing to add to Five's character assassination is during the fight scene with The Cleanse. Diego, rightfully angry and upset, tells Five to stay away from Lila. Instead of trying to apologize or explain himself or voice his anger at Diego, Five just immediately starts fighting him. He doesn't try to help his family or save Ben, he fights his little brother over his own wife (though Diego also didn't stop fighting either). Five even blatantly states that he wants to kill Diego. Lila tells him it's over and he just goes "Damn ✌️😕" and blinks away, again leaving his family to try to save Ben and stop The Cleanse

[hiding-under-the-willow]

There is a version of him living rent free in my head that decided to go apeshit at some point between the first and second movies and it does not go particularly well for anyone

[spartanlocke]

every time i say tumblr staff (and tumblr itself let's be real) made social media worse by never punishing harassment, allowing people to get comfortable pushing cancel and callout culture so they could harass and dehumanize anyone (especially minorities) they want without ever having to worry about consequences, an attitude they brought with them to other websites like tiktok and twitter after the 2018 porn ban....

This is what I'm talking about. tumblr staff doesn't give a shit if you're stalked and harassed, but if you're a trans woman posting selfies? instant ban.

tumblr staff has NEVER done anything to protect its users, but now they're actively participating in doing the harm.

[cuepickle]

Stranger Things x Breakfast Club AU (part ?)

[anghraine]

I love that Elizabeth and Darcy are so ready to effectively tell each other they're full of shit. This happens a bunch of times, but I was re-reading their conversation at the Netherfield Ball and they're both kind of refreshingly Done.

[Darcy:] “Do you talk by rule, then, while you are dancing?” [Elizabeth:] “Sometimes. One must speak a little, you know. It would look odd to be entirely silent for half an hour together; and yet, for the advantage of some, conversation ought to be so arranged as that they may have the trouble of saying as little as possible.” [Darcy:] “Are you consulting your own feelings in the present case, or do you imagine that you are gratifying mine?” “Both,” replied Elizabeth archly; “for I have always seen a great similarity in the turn of our minds. We are each of an unsocial, taciturn disposition, unwilling to speak, unless we expect to say something that will amaze the whole room, and be handed down to posterity with all the éclat of a proverb.” “This is no very striking resemblance of your own character, I am sure,” said he.

It's also pretty funny, because I suspect Darcy is thinking of this sort of thing in a later conversation at Rosings:

“You mean to frighten me, Mr Darcy, by coming in all this state to hear me. But I will not be alarmed, though your sister does play so well. There is a stubbornness about me that never can bear to be frightened at the will of others. My courage always rises with every attempt to intimidate me.” “I shall not say that you are mistaken,” he replied, “because you could not really believe me to entertain any design of alarming you; and I have had the pleasure of your acquaintance long enough to know, that you find great enjoyment in occasionally professing opinions which, in fact, are not your own.”

[s0fter-sin]

soapghost circus au

ghost’s an extreme motorcycle stunt performer - globe of death, riding on his back wheel along tightropes, that sort of thing

soap’s a fire breather/dancer. he’s a roaming performer; he just finds empty spaces or bored people and starts twirling

he pretends not to notice the way he always wanders towards a certain tent every night to watch a certain masked daredevil defy gravity. he thinks he's slick and that ghost won't notice him in the crowd, completely forgetting that he's carrying something that happens to be on fire

ghost couldn't miss him if he tried

one day off, soap's trialing fire whips; he loves the loud crack and the way the flame licks through the air and maybe he's a little too impatient to practice with non flaming whips first, even though he's never used one before

he's covered in soot and fine welts where the tip of the whip keeps flicking back up at him, cutting through his shirt and stinging his skin but he doesn't let that stop him. it starts to stick to him, damp with sweat and blood and he's quick to strip it off; throwing it to the side to keep practicing

when soap finally gets a few good cracks in a row and breaks to celebrate, he almost jumps out of his skin when he sees the masked rider leaning against a trailer watching him

of all the times he's wanted ghost to talk to him, this is not one of them

he wanted to impress him, dance for him with his flaming batons and be mesmerised by his fluidity and skill

not catch him filthy and struggling with something as basic as a whip

he's ready for ghost to ream him out for not having control over the whip - he's known throughout the circuit for expecting utter perfection in his routines - but when ghost finally does speak, it's only to ask if he's done for the day

soap falters for a moment. he wanted to get some consistency with the whip before he stopped, but he's starting to feel the hours of practice; muscles aching and skin blistered with minor burns

he says he is and ghost pushes off the trailer, nodding his head to make soap follow. he brings him back to his trailer and tells him to clean up then takes out his personal med kit to treat the grazes on soap's skin

soap's shocked; for all that he loves to watch ghost perform, they've never really talked before

part of why he joined the circus was so he wouldn't be a burden on anyone, the oldest in a family with too many mouths to feed and not even time to nurture, and here he is taking up ghost's valuable practice time bc he wasn't good enough to handle his own discipline. he tries to brush him off, downplaying the burns and tries to leave before half them can be treated but ghost just glares and orders him to sit back down

ghost does expect perfection from himself but it isn’t out of any malice or ego; it's bc he knows if he isn't perfect, he could very easily die. he’s picked a dangerous profession and he gives it the respect it deserves. there isn't any shame in being a novice or failing at something; he thinks there's a lot of beauty in having the courage to get back up again and again

so every day he watches soap practice and bullies him into his trailer to put him back together bc he knows he won't do it by himself

and every night soap wanders over to ghost's section of the fair grounds, in awe of his skill and wishing he could be worthy of the care he gives him