#this is complete crack

[forgetmenot-mymoon]

The Ballad of Tentaclopacus

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Author's note: So me and my bestie were on vacation and we played the make up a story game, where she said a sentence then I said a sentence and it made a story. Then I was like, ima write this down! Now this exists and it is pure crack, stupidity and so many plot points ignored or missing (Bestie refused to let Tentalopacus be kidnapped)

Enjoy my suffering!

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The Beginning...

Once upon a time, there was once a lonely sea star in a sea kingdom who hated the sea but wouldn’t go on land because of big monsters with GIANT teeth.

Logan needed a girl with long tubule feet and large suckers but, as Logan searched the sea, he couldn’t find anyone like that. So as all sane people do, he held a party and invited “pretty stars,” he literally sent shells with invites written into the currents, he trusted fate. The party had a variety of starfish with tube feet with different numbers of arms, even some basket stars but none of them had big juicy tube feet. Logan sat in the corner pissy until eventually, the festivities ended with Logan kicking them all out. After that embarrassment, he strolled around mourning his dead (never alive) love life. Logan stumbled into a shark named Hajula with black pearly eyes and beautiful black-tipped fins, sharp. He shook and asked the shark if she had seen any hot starfish with hot tube feet, she called him an idiot and then said with a laugh, "Let’s get married,"

At the wedding, there were many guests, some starfish, some sharks, and some random creatures like eels. Logan, while talking to guests in a manly suit, revealing his “abs" suddenly saw a hot starfish. He was entranced by her color, a mysterious purple like the night stars. He watched her from afar, letting the words among him drift away, even her large suckers were a light purple. The ceremony started and the ring eel was nice to not electrocute them. Hajula kissed him hard, happy to finally be loved. They celebrated all night, mostly in each other's arms. But… As the party started dying down he saw the star of starfishes once again, he ran up and started flirting, even asking if she wanted to “be in the coral with him,” Hajula’s brothers, Alo and Haai immediately ran to tell her once they overheard these lewd words. The young shark hearing this gasped and in a blind rage ate them as they struggled to no avail against giant Hajula, The guests watched in horror, she ate some starfish too. Logan stood there horrified, shaking in his exoskeleton. In shock, he opened his beak and screamed “EAT ME INSTEAD,”

Hajula ground her teeth with hunger, some of his siblings' skin stuck between the knives of teeth. He shook like sea tremors did in the deep cold water of death. Logan wanted to crawl away but he was frozen, flight nor flight would do anything against this beast. Hajula unhinged her jaws like a land monster. Logan regretted never seeing a land beast, were they as beautiful as Hajula? The weirdo thought just before the floor turned into a Red Sea. Some clear saliva dripped down from her jaw with the red, all out of lust. Logan stood in horror as its eye spot photoreceptors were ripped in half. The starfish could still feel even if half was gone, it felt the sticky floor pool around him. Logan didn't even have any last thoughts, just screams. Everything went black for the perverted starfish. Now the couple would be together forever.

After the chaos, only an arm was left…

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The young starfish woke up with the conch’s yell of an alarm. Sweat rolled all around his arms like a tide pool. He woke, groggy, and broke the conch shell with its tube feet grip, and then the star finally crawled out of bed. Tentaclopacus’s mother gave him his lunch, a small box filled with star and heart-shaped veggies and fruits. He kissed her on the cheek as a goodbye. Her teeth in a harsh smile as her pearly black eyes pooled with love for the little star.

Hajula brushed Tentaclopacus with her fins before pushing the little star out the door. He met up with two shark friends, Jaime and Richard. They both were shark jocks which meant they ranted about the hockey season starting this fall. Both were excited as their fins and teeth rattled like a hockey puck in a court. Tentaclopacus stayed silent walking along with them but slowly falling behind his only lights. The friends dispersed without a word to the falling star as they got to the school door. The building was old and creaked with the ocean currents. It was made of some giant shells along with shark cartilage. Dead sharks needed to be used, either in honor or punishment. Tentaclopacus walked through the halls to his first period of math. The hallways were rocky and windy but along them were frames of taxidermy, the first was this weird giant monster, a giant monster, supposedly the ones on land, a giant jaw with razor teeth and tiny arms with claws, strange colorful soft items around parts of its body. After this giant was taxidermy of everyday creatures, many on the lunch menu for sharks. A sea cucumber, tuna, squid, crawfish, oyster, and then a starfish…he stared into the frame seeing his reflection in the glass. It always wanted to ask his mother where he came from but she just ground her teeth like she did when her dinner wasn’t right… after a few moments her smile went rigid and she changed the subject, asking about school or math…but as superintendent, she already knew the answer. He felt queasy like there was a sea tremor but quickly shook it off. But as he did Tony the black-tipped shark rounded the corner, Tentaclopacus shifted to camouflage into the wall as Tony swam past him around another corner, after a few minutes of quiet the starfish shifted his chromatophores back to normal and started walking- Suddenly Tony dashed back around the corner- His eyes hungry staring at the small star. "I knew you were there, Tentafreaklopacus !" The black fins weren't covered in blood this time. (Tony loved beating smaller sharks to death) The clean fins made Tentaclopacus relaxed slightly, then jerked back because that meant Tony was hungry. It shivered like a long-buried memory had scratched its nerve ring. Before Tony got a chance to open his razor mouth, Jake appeared with his deformed face and black pearl eyes. He was the hall monitor because even sharks need that. Because of that, he wasn’t messed with (to his face) oh and he had a sob story of a dead mom.

“What are you all doing??!! Get to class!!” He said with his funky teeth (another thing they made fun of) Jake was the only hall monitor to last this long without getting eaten, maybe it was because of that goblin appearance. “It’s just first period!” Tony whined with his teeth. “Do you want me to write you up?” Jake manifested pen and paper in his fins, death staring the black tipped even with the size difference. Tony yielded and swam away. Before Tentaclopacus could scramble away Jake pinned him to the wall and looked at him with hungry eyes. Then just…let go and left without another word. Finally after all that, Tentaclopacus arrived at his class, it felt like centuries since the late bell had rung. He quietly tiptoed in, keeping low to the ground, ignoring the loud tube feet. The class snickered a bit but most were just boredly hungry of the stupid star. If his mom wasn’t superintendent he would’ve been dead in 3 seconds flat. Tentalocpus sat down at his desk which like in a Japanese cartoon had insults and threats written on it by the class with their teeth. This was math but shark and starfish math were different. Everything was. Sharks counted teeth but starfish counted arms. Shark history was full of blood, starfish history was full of death. Shark science was the science of killing, starfishes didn’t do that sort of killing. Sharkish and the starfish language were different too. (He didn't know the name of his own language)

Tentaclopacus learned nothing from these classes even if it spent nights studying. Even when he failed a class or got beat up Hajula wouldn��t let him leave school. Failing didn’t affect anything. Tentaclopacus had failed grades before but didn't actually fail. When he got bruised the ones who did it were gone the next day, parents and siblings sobbing in Ms. Shell's room quietly. The conch sounded off, wailing its cries for freedom. The starfish waited till most of his classmates were out before crawling out. Sharks still purposefully tripped him. When the small starfish was half way to his next class some salt broke out of his eye spots. He couldn't do this, Tentaclopacus skipped the rest of the day, one of his final mistakes.

It slowly crawled its way to the store, where else could it go other than school? Hiding in the coral reef was the definition of stranger danger. So a store full of sharks would be much much safer! He scooted in the doors hoping no one would question why the automatic doors opened to no one. Tentaclopacus used its Chromatophores to hide among the shell floor, a shell moving was a bit weird though but most sharks just shrugged and ignored it. Shelves filled with “pre-hunted starfish '' some of them look like they could be his siblings…one has a mysterious purple color like the night stars. It felt like it had seen that one before along with some others…but mom had never let Tentaclopacus meet its kind. There weren’t any living ones around to meet. The little star shook all the icky feeling off and scrambled to a less starfish filled shelf. He moved to the safer old wooden shelves where it was easier to hide and used them to move around. He hid behind a can of tuna and observed the sharks, trying to find out the difference in mannerisms that made them so different. However, its eyespot could only see so much and its nerve ring could understand little. A fin suddenly picked the can up with Tentaclopacus holding on for dear life. He tried to not shake with fear, knowing that would be his end. Thankfully the can shook so much that Tentaclopacus fell off right before it was lowered into the cart, he sped away hiding under the shelf that then fell- fell on the shark with the tuna and its pup with a loud roar. Tenteclopse decided it was time to run and did so, making it out with icy shivers haunting him, his muscles refusing to calm.

As his eyespots looked around trying to figure out the way home and NOT GET EATEN. A familiar figure suddenly swam up to him.

Jake, the hall monitor. He guessed school was already over,

Jake’s fangs glinted in the sun as he smiled at Tentaclopacus. The young star felt shivers run down his nerve ring as if traveling through time. “Hey there! I didn’t see you today…did you skip?” he said with a grin, like one practiced in a mirror.

“Oh, well…” The starfish's nerve ring lit up trying to make up a story,

“Well, I wasn't feeling well and I didn't have breakfast so I tried to get some at the store,”

“Oh! I’m so sorry, I could bring you food y'know,” The shark licked his lips, dreaming of plated starfish.

“No, no my mom was just busy today, don't worry it's just a one-time thing,” “Well I would hope so, wouldn't wanna have to write you up,” Tentaclopacus was confused, his mom would never take that. Maybe he knew this and that's why Jake quickly switched topics, still smiling with black eyes.

'Well…I was thinking we could hang out sometime?’ His black eyes hit the sunlight. First Tentaclopacus thought they were pearly like his mothers…but as he stared into them. Jake’s eyes were just a void.

“Uhh, no thank you, my mom needs me at home,” Tentaclopacus was horrified of what could happen by saying those few words- or any words- to a predator but what else could the young starfish do?

“Your mom won't be the big man forever!” Jake said, his void eyes now like a black hole, “I’ll show her that, just like Dad told me to!” He yelled that battle cry as he opened his deformed jaws, stretching them out into an impossible length to grab the starfish.

As his vision faded he saw black tips at the edge of the coral.

-There wasn't any pain at first, just dark- But before the fear could even set in the hurricane of blood and guts turned inside out. Tentclopcus remembered everything as the teeth sunk into every nerve. His beak crushed too fast to let out the tiniest cry. Just gone

Tentclopacus’s last thought was, “God, what an asshole I was in his past life.” Not even an arm remained this time.

The end

*Stay tuned for the next story, THE BALLAD OF HAJULA Coming 2026 or 2020never (probably will eventually happen)

Tentaclopacus REAL (this is him, it’s canon)

[fanaticalthings]

next thing you're gonna tell me is that the butts match 🙄

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[wearecrowley]

good omens crack 2 of ∞

[feligayzed]

biiiiiig stretch

[the-odd-shu]

Sky regrets trying to play wingman

A continuation of lab shenanigans.

Masterlist

Next part

Characters: Viktor, Jayce, Reader, Sky

(Pre-Jayce/Viktor/Reader) (POLYCULEEEE!)

Summary: A sketchbook goes missing, Viktor and Jayce feel soft about it and Sky is fighting for her life.

Note; this takes place during season 1, and the reader is gender neutral with they/them pronouns.

Lab Illustrator!Reader has a secret A5 sketchbook they don't use for assignments. It's a small thing, that they keep tucked beneath all of their other paperwork during the day, and take home with them every night.

It is as non-descript as sketchbooks come, with a plain, black cover and pages brimming with hundreds of sketches and stuck in sheets of paper.

But what makes it different from their professional sketchbook, you ask? And why does it need to be a secret?

Well, because it is a notebook solely dedicated to drawings and doodles of their co-workers. And neither of them know that Reader has been drawing them.

There are hundreds of stolen moments stuffed between these pages. Late night coffee breaks, where the pencil lines are thick and dark to accentuate the dimness of the lab against the stark light leaking out of the kitchenette, where backs are turned and coffee mugs steam, whilst eyes fall to half-mast from the sheer weight of the late hour.

There are a dozen or so slower, more carefully done doodles of Jayce sprawled out across the lab couch in various positions. Several cane studies, because Viktor had a habit of leaving it in more and more odd places when he has had a breakthrough, and sheer determination and spite keep him standing unaided before the whiteboard.

There are pages dedicated to Viktor reading. And pages brimming with Jayce's broad shoulders and winning smile.

There is a double page spread of Viktor stood before the chalkboard, cane in one hand, his other tucked under his chin with a piece of chalk tucked between two of his fingers, his lips pursed in thought as he tried to find a solution to the problem before him. The lines of this sketch are soft and gentle, almost dreamlike, as the image was teased out of the page.

The pages directly after it show a heavy handed pen drawing of Jayce bent over his desk, goggles over his eyes, his tongue peeking out from between his lips as he welds pieces of metal together. A single, loose curl of hair having broken free of its slicked back appearance, and is now sprawled cutely down his forehead.

And that's only the beginning.

Neither of them know that Reader draws them. As far as they know, Reader can't even draw people. And Reader wants to keep it that way. Because if EITHER of them found the sketchbook, they just KNOW they would not let them live it down. Jayce would be embarrassed, no doubt asking stupid questions like, 'is my nose really like that from that angle' or 'why didn't you tell me I had soot on my cheek', which, how dare he, you'd spent hours learning how to draw him and picking out imperfections was just an insult to your skills. Whilst Viktor would make fun of your subject choices, and then make it one hundred times harder to sketch him without him getting suspicious and catching on and deliberately moving around MORE to make it seventeen times more difficult.

Out of everyone in the lab, Sky was the only other person remotely artistically inclined. She'd shown an interest in your work one afternoon, and let slip that she liked to draw in her spare time. And although she insisted her work was nothing like your professional illustrations, they were good! And you told her as such.

Unofficially, the pair of you had begun taking your lunches outside in the academy gardens together to chat and draw. She did not look it, but Sky was a mean gossip, and seemed to know everything that was going on in the science department. Such as who in the academy was currently trying to court who, or the latest experiment that blew up (literally) in a freshman's face, or that Councillor Medarda herself dabbled in painting.

The last one certainly caught your attention more than the drama on campus, which of course Sky was more than happy to provide more details for. Apparently, the Councillor's paintings were bold and striking. Depicting scenes from her childhood lands, and figures dressed in traditional Noxian-style garbs.

"Gorgeous, simply gorgeous." Sky said, tone bordering on wistful. "And large too. Councillor Medarda works on such a large scale, that some of her pieces literally command your attention the moment you step into the room. I'm sure you can talk Jayce into getting you a glimpse of some of her works. He and the Councillor have been growing close lately."

You ignored the suggestive hint to her voice, in favour of humming noncommittally and finishing up your lastest sketch of Sky perched on the wall beside you, waving her sandwich around as she talked animatedly. You were so engrossed in your work that you didn't notice she was watching, when you flipped back towards the front of your sketchbook, only for her to choke on her next bite.

“Wait!" She blurted out between sharp coughing. "Is that Viktor!?” And then suddenly your sketchbook was no longer on your lap and the apprentice of the man you were always drawing was flipping through the pages. The pages that HEAVILY featured Viktor's face.

Your cheeks burned, and lunged for the sketchbook out of sheer panic, as Sky began discovering just how MANY sketches of Viktor you've been hoarding and that he's not the ONLY ONE you've been drawing.

"Jayce too I see." She mused, more to herself than you. And then she snorted. "Why are there so many?”

“Because I get bored sometimes, and they're always just there!" You defend yourself guiltily. "It's good anatomy practice.”

Which wasn't technically a lie. The lines never came as easily as they did when you’re sketching your co-workers. So much so, that now, it had almost become instinct to know when your pencil had drawn a line wrong, even before you glanced back to the reference themselves to check. The pair of them were just so effortlessly beautiful in their own ways. It would a a crime for you <i>not</i> to draw them, and focus solely on the things you're SUPPOSED to be illustrating instead.

Sky hummed along, having paused on a page with a rapid, barely recognisable pen sketch of Jayce ducking away with a cackling laugh as a furious Viktor swung his cane at his head. Her fingers idly slid down the sketchy lines, a fondness to her expression.

"Have you shown them these?" Sky asked, "they're really good. All loose and fun. I can practically hear Jayce laughing in this one with how you captured his expression."

“Of course not!" You were quick to deny as your cheeks heated. "Do you know how embarrassing it is to show someone you’ve drawn them? Jayce will pretend to be all impressed but subconsciously begin to pick out all the things I got wrong. Like the shape of his ears. And Viktor will tell me it's 'lovely' without looking up from his textbook."

You shuddered at the very thought, already seeing Viktor's disinterested frown and Jayce's tight grimace in your mind's eye.

Sky frowned, her eyes jumping between your down turned expression and the sketchbook in her hands. “I dunno about that."

“Can I have it back now?” She shook her head and went back to flipping through the pages, the other half of her sandwich forgotten in her lap. “You know, I think Viktor would be flattered if he knew you paid so much attention to him. And Jayce would probably try to steal a couple of these and frame them for his desk.” You scoffed.

Sky's frown deepened. "Why are you having such a hard time believing they might like these?"

“Because in the end it doesn’t matter how they'd react,” you decided sharply, “because they're not going to find out. Are they, Sky?”

“You’ve even drawn Viktor's canes!”

“Sky, focus!” “I am focused- IS THAT A JAYCE HAND STUDY-?!”

"OKAY ENOUGH OF THAT FROM YOU!" You tackled her, and she went down screeching, drawing the attention of several passing students as the pair of you fell cleaningly off of the wall and landed in the flowerbeds below.

Sky did not keep her promise.

After a week or two of waiting to give the impression she'd forgotten about the whole ordeal, she sprung into action.

It was obvious now that she knew just how much Reader paid attention to their co-workers. It seemed like they were constantly sketching the boys throughout the day, a private, fond smile on their stupidly love-struck expression, as their pencil flew across the page, documenting coffee breaks and break throughs, and verbal spats. Now Sky has noticed that they did it, she couldn't stop seeing it, and it is driving her crazy. All three of them are so oblivious, and watching her superiors pine for one another whilst doing nothing to move things forward, was NOT the working environment she'd been hoping for during this internship.

So she took matters into her own hands.

When the hour was late, and the lights were dim, Jayce passed out at his desk for a quick nap, Viktor's attention on his textbooks at the chalkboard, and Reader in the kitchen cracking open a can of energy, Sky sidled over to the latter's desk. Her eyes immediately clocked the little, black sketchbook, easily overlooked amongst the other papers and opened notebooks with half complete drawings scrawled all over the place. It was a testament to how much they trusted each other in the lab, that no one questioned why she was lingering so close to a desk that was not her own.

It almost made it too easy for her to simply pluck the sketchbook out of the pile, add it to her pile of library books already balanced in one hand, all before loudly calling "good night" to the room and leaving.

Sky planned to be the first person in the next morning to plant the sketchbook, but the lab doors were unlocked when she turned up, and all three of her superiors were already in the room, looking in various states of exhaustion. Did they even go home last night?

Not to mention, half of the lab looked like a hoard of dogs had come tearing through. Come to think of it, Reader's desk was especially messy, with papers strewn everywhere and the drawers hanging on just barely- oh fuck! They had already noticed, hadn't they?

"Ah Sky, good morning." Viktor acknowledged her from where he was calmly sorting through a stack of books. Picking one up, and shaking it out before placing it onto a second stack and picking up the next. "Right on time." "Good morning," Sky greeted calmly, "what's going on here?" She motioned to the war zone that was the lab. To Jayce balanced precariously on a chair, checking a high book shelf, and the frantic shuffling sounds of Reader under their desk. They were out of view, but somehow, Sky could just envision the frenzy in their expression from the sound of their searching alone.

"Ah, well, Y/n appears to have misplaced a rather important sketchbook."

There was a yelp as a skull collided with the underside of a desk, before Reader's head popped up over the edge. "Sky! I can't find it!"

"Oh no." Sky replied, trying to ignore the burning weight of the 'it' in question, currently hiding in her backpack. "Where did you see it last?"

"They insisted it was on their desk." Jayce interjected, hopping down from his chair with a shake of his head.

"But I'm assuming it's grown legs," Sky joked, "judging by that picked over, barely standing, mess of a desk."

"This isn't funny Sky."

"No, you're right." She put down her backpack and began to help in the search. After all, not doing so would immediately out her as guilty, and she'd already come this far, why stop now. "Come on, it can't have gone far."

Of course, Viktor discovered it amongst his books and papers a couple of days later.

It was during one of those rare hours in the lab when he was alone. The hour was late, but the curtains were not yet drawn despite the darkening sky.

He frowned when his fingers brushed the unfamiliar notebook, tucked behind a stack of textbooks and scrunched up balls of notes. Pulling it out of its hiding place, his brows furrowed as his eyes tracked the state it was in. How the edges of the hardback covers were creased from numerous journeys in bags, whilst pencils marks and scuffs from countless hours of being opened and used, marred the covers.

At first, he assumed it was one of Jayce’s notebook. The material was expensive enough. Definitely of high quality. The paper itself was thick when he rubbed his finger along a page. But when he opened it, he quickly realised the pages are not lined, and were once blank before they had been filled in with hundreds of drawings.

The first few pages were illustrations of everything under the sun. Still life drawings. Animals. People. Silhouettes. Isolated body parts with detailed annotations encircling them, such as the names of muscles and tiny corrective comments like ‘fingers too long’ or ‘that muscle doesn’t stretch that far’. 

Then he turned a page, and was met with himself. And then Jayce. And then more and more sketches of himself and Jayce. Sometimes together and interacting. Sometimes just existing.

The drawings were skilfully done, as all of Reader's illustrations tended to be. A little rough in the beginning, from rushed pen strokes. But then the artist seemed to understand something. A break through of sorts, and he recognised himself more and more. The sketches held his likeness. From the way he stood, to the slouch of him sitting at his desk, to the way his hand held something as simple as a stick of chalk.

They were always sketches from behind or a side profile. Never head on. And any that did depict him as facing the artist, were drawn when his attention was elsewhere; focused down at a textbook, or fixing something on the table. 

It was flattering really. He looked good in the drawings. Confident, with an authoritative aura. Seemingly engrossed in every task he sat down to complete.

And Jayce, Jayce looks good in his drawings too. His sunny personality shining through in drawings where he was animatedly talking or debating with sketched Viktor. There seems to be a whole double page spread trying to figure out the shape of his slicked back hair, and then even more drawings of the gel softening throughout the day, causing strands to fall down around his ears and frame his eyes.

But what really catches Viktor's attention was the way the artist had caught their interactions. The way they have depicted Jayce's softened eyes when looking at Viktor when his attention was elsewhere. The way they caught Viktor's private little smile when Jayce got lost in a muttering spell and stopped including Viktor in the debate. It left him feeling a little raw in truth, like this person had seen something no one else had taken the time to notice before.

No wonder Reader had been so adamant about finding this sketchbook. This must have been hours upon hours of careful work.

Carefully, Viktor closed the sketchbook and sat back in his chair. It felt heavy in his hands, and he almost didn't want to put it down.

The door to the lab swung open then, and Jayce called out a greeting.

"What you got there V?"

And of course, Viktor was contractually obligated to show him. It would simply be criminal if he didn't show his partner just how well their resident illustrator managed to capture his winning smile. A much more accurate depiction of it, compared to the 'man of progress' merchandise the academy sold nowadays.

The sketchbook continued to go unfound.

Reader was growing more and more distraught.

The guilt gnawed at Sky and she confessed.

All hell broke loose.

An hour later, Skye came SPRINTING into the lab, the double doors CRASHING into the walls in her haste to get into the room.

Both Viktor and Jayce jumped in their seats in the kitchenette. Viktor barely managing to keep from spilling his sweetmilk everywhere. And Jayce almost THREW the little black sketchbook across the room, where he had been admiring its pages.

“Woah there, where’s the fire?” Jayce tried to joke, but Sky looked GENUINELY scared. 

“Sorry! Sorry! I left something in here, and the owner is NOT happy with me.” Sky scrambled to explain, as she charged towards Viktor’s desk and began pulling apart stacks of paperwork. Sweat beading on her brow.

“Hey, calm down. What is it? Where did you see it last?” “It was a sketchbook. Um, uh, black, hard cover, it was practically bulging with how many pages it had stuck in it.” Sky explained, "I could've sworn I left it on Viktor's desk." Viktor’s brows jump up in realisation. His eyes dart over to the sketchbook in Jayce's hands, before leaping up to meet the man's wide, knowing eyes.

“I take it that Y/n found out you took it then.” Viktor spoke up. Sky winced. “I may have let it slip-” her voice began to backpedal, before the distant stomp of approaching footsteps made her pale. The gait the recognisable, the tempo just a touch faster than its normal pace. “DON’T THINK HIDING BEHIND VIKTOR OR JAYCE WILL SAVE YOU NOW!” A booming voice hollered from down the hallway. 

Sky became frantic again. She redoubled her efforts.

Jayce very slowly lowered the sketchbook down to his lap, where the table would conceal it from view if anyone peered into the kitchenette. And Viktor just sighed as he got comfortable.

Heavy footsteps approached the laboratory door, which was then promptly kicked open, so fast that the door smacked into the opposite wall for the second time today. Y/n, brandishing a broom of all things, visibly seethed in the doorway. 

“Do you know how much <i>work</i> has gone into that sketchbook?” They demanded, more furious than Viktor had ever seen them before. “How many hours I’ve spent amongst those pages.” Sky looks appropriately guilty. “I know! And I’m so sorry I lost it, I really thought I was doing you a favour!”

Reader’s lip curls up into a furious snarl, eyes narrowing. “And I thought I told you to leave it alone!” They snarled.

“But they’re just so good. I seriously don’t think you should be hiding your talent. What if the right person managed to find it, like Councillor Medarda, imagine the connections-” “And how, pray tell, is Councillor Medarda, supposed to come across my sketchbook in the laboratory of all places.” Skye’s voice lowers. “Well, she does stop by to see Jayce often enough.”

Reader sighed heavily. "Side-stepping that poor excuse, because we both know you were just trying to embarrass me-" "I was not! They're good drawings!"

“Where is it Skye? For the final time.”

They stepped menacingly into the room then, broom clutched tightly in both hands, only to pause when a single sheet of paper slipped out of their pocket and fluttered to the ground. The action clearly held significance, because Sky winced.

Meanwhile, Reader took a deep, steadying breath, before slowly, calmly leaning down to pluck the paper off of the floor. It was only for a second, but Viktor could have sworn he saw yet ANOTHER sketch of him and Jayce, which HOW? They'd been with the pair of them in the lab ALL DAY!

“Now look at me, I’m shedding paper left and right without my sketchbook to keep all my thoughts ORGANISED!” “I’m sorry! I’ll buy you a new one.”

A groan. “Skye, that is NOT the point-!”

“Okay, okay! Time out! Let us all take a breath.” Viktor interjected to which both apprentice and Illustrator startled. 

Reader visibly seethed in place, whilst Sky just winced and ducked her head.

It was the former who spoke up first. “Sorry for the interruption.” They said sharply, eyes cutting over to Viktor and Jayce. To which Viktor just inclined his head, whilst Jayce very poorly concealed his guilty wince. Reader was too preoccupied with Sky however to notice as they turned back to her. “May we continue this debate outside? Preferably away from the workshops?” Skye seemed to shrink in on herself more. Eyes darting over to Viktor, then jumping up to Jayce. 

“Sky!”

“Only if you promise to stop yelling.” She demanded. 

Reader breathed out forcefully through their nostrils. Expression thinning out, shoulders easing, although the tightness to their jaw remained stubbornly present. “Fine.”

"Leave the broom!" Viktor called after them, to which Reader audibly groaned but let the broom in the lab before stepping out into the hall with Sky. The door clicked shut behind them. 

Jayce and Viktor shared a look and held their breaths. Waiting. Listening. The conversation that inevitably started up once the door closes was fast paced, but in the promised quieter tone. 

"I'm just going to-" Jayce began to say before motioning to the desks out in the main lab. Viktor shrugged, and allowed his partner to stand, sketchbook in hand, only for both of them to freeze when a loose slip of paper fell out.

"Oh no." Jayce said aloud as Viktor quickly pinned the sheet to the floor with the toe of his shoe, before it could drift away. "This is going to be adorable, isn't it?"

Viktor did not reply, as he stooping to pick it up. He turned it over, and he and Jayce collectively sighed as they discovered yet another sketch of the pair of them.

They're stood in front of the chalkboard, which seemed to be Reader's favourite place to draw them without being discovered. And it was clear from the way the pair were facing each other that they were deep in one of their debates. But what really caught the pair's attention, was the way that their drawn selves were looking at one another.

Viktor's with a small, knowing smile and a visible twinkle in his eye - which should have been an impossible thing to capture with merely a pencil. And Jayce's who was staring down at Viktor with an intensity in his eye and a playful lift of his eyebrows that spoke of challenge. They looked happy together. Feeding off one another's energy.

And it was startling that an outside perspective had managed to capture such a moment without either of them noticing.

"We don't get that absorbed in our debates, do we?" Jayce asked tightly, a soft look in his eye now as he gazed down at the sketch with reverence.

Viktor did not bother to deny it, because they both knew that they did. Here was a sketchbook stuffed with the evidence right before them.

Jayce tucked the sketch back between the pages, his expression complicated and yet oh so fond for someone who was no longer in the room with them.

Jayce and Viktor put the sketchbook back on Reader's desk, who later comes back in, visibly more subdued, and Sky nowhere in sight.

Viktor cracks a joke about them having stuffed her in a supply closet somewhere.

To which they reassure him that, "no, she had a meeting," and he would still have an apprentice turning up to work tomorrow.

Jayce looks up from his work, as does Viktor, when they make a beeline for their desk. In time to watch Reader stiffen when they see the little, black sketchbook placed neatly on top of their larger, official lab sketchbook. Then they lunge forward, snatching it up and flipping through the pages, shoulders loosening when all seems to be in order.

"You found it!"

"Viktor found it." Jauce interjected.

To which Viktor just preens and makes another joke about Sky thinking twice about getting between Reader and their belongings. He also throws in a compliment on the penmanship, just to see how Reader reacts.

To both of their surprises, Reader locks up at the compliment. “Please tell me you didn’t look though it.”

“I liked them." He said truthfully, "you certainly captured my likeness.” They groan and drop eye contact. 

“Please don’t joke about it.” They plead, “it was just anatomy practice. But I completely understand if it makes you uncomfortable-”

“Uncomfortable?" Viktor parrots back, shooting Jayce a look. "Why would it make us uncomfortable?" "You might feel watched?" Reader offers.

Jayce shrugs. Viktor waves off their concern.

Jayce, "can we put some up on the pin board?" "No. None of these are remotely good enough to be hung up on display!" Reader is quick to deny.

By the end of the day, there are three new papers pinned to the pin board above Jayce's desk. One drawn by each of them in the lab. A chicken scratch drawing of Jayce, courtesy of Viktor. A carefully, but wonkily drawn Reader, courtesy of Jayce. And a recognisable and remarkably good drawing of Viktor done by Reader.

(Yes, they had a drawing competition and sat in a circle around someone's desk, simultaneously posing for and drawing each other. The boys had to do some major convincing so that Reader didn't assume they were being made fun of. And they all ended up having a great time).

Next part

[canon-gabriel-quotes]

Transcript:

BUT DADDY I LOVE HIM.

THE MACHINE.

I CAN FIX HIM.

NO REALLY I CAN.

Audio Source

[juniemunie]

Its the kids turn!! ⸜(˃ ᵕ ˂ )⸝

i put way too much effort in this

Don't worry they're still FAR from the conventional nuclear family lmao

PJ is by @/7goodangel

Gradient is by @/askcomboclub

Template by @/unu-nunu-art

Error and Fresh by @/loverofpiggies

Ink by @/comyet

Design notes under!

Design Notes for PJ:

-Error patches up the tears on his scarf! Very nice of him to do.

-All the art materials he has stashed on his belt are for food. He likes to snack on em often.

-Because of Error's..."tolerance" of him, he has more strings that he can use. He's got enough to form legs.

-Fresh gifts him magical ink durable Heely shoes! Instead of shedding footprints all over the place, he can instead heely/skate around and leave behind lines. He's creative on using it during battles. He would never admit it, but he appreciates the gift.

Design Notes for Gradient:

-I based his outfit off ye old web aesthetics like Cyber Grunge,,, I really liked the big pants look on him.

-I placed his scarf on his neck to match with his family, but also to match Template's scarf hehe, a little sign of his influence.

-You can't see it but his laptop bag has a ton of pins and merch of random dated internet references.

-His shoes looking old design Ink's shoes were complete accident but I liked it enough to keep anyway. Maybe Ink gave it to him and he spiced it up!

[eddiestightywhities]

Eddie: Dom or sub?

Buck: Uhhh, Domino's? I guess? I'm not really that into Subway.

Eddie: Cariño, you are so damn lucky that I'm into you.

[nefelibatat]

So it's kinda interesting how Jinx is basically Caitlyn's own extremely malevolent genie. Every desire she has, Jinx fulfills, but with such a cruel twist that it almost defeats the point.

Want something new and exciting in your sheltered life? Well, one might say nearly getting blown up is pretty exciting. Looking for a real job to undertake? Here's a convenient pile of evidence leading you straight to the heart of a criminal empire. Good luck getting out of this mess though. Coworkers making you feel excluded? They can't do that now; they're dead. Longing to see Vi again? Don't worry. You will be taken to her, like it or not. Mum being too restrictive? Never again!

It's no wonder Jinx is associated with monkeys when her role in the show is ensuring a monkey's paw curls any time Caitlyn has a vague inclination towards something.

[armand-dearest]

It's of my firm belief that Armand would have a highly experimental YouTube channel filled with the weirdest content ever. You know, the guy who in canon records timelapses of his hair growing while he sleeps? The guy who records videos of himself reading poetry and watches them back simply for his own amusement on a regular basis? Yeah.

Humans wouldn't know what to think of it. Some think it's a weird art project. Others think it's an ARG. Others think it's a niche ASMR channel.

The Talamasca hate their jobs because this week someone has to watch through the entirety of Armand's Minecraft Let's Play #64, and the video is 5 hours long recorded on Unregistered Hypercam 2 with a grainy facecam in the corner of the video where Armand sits there expressionless, silent and unblinking the entire time, save for when he smiles ever so slightly after name tagging villager as Lestat and has it turned into a zombie only so he can nurse it back to health again, before trapping it in a cell for the rest of its pixelated existence

[zivazivc]

this came to me in a dream

Floyd's emo ass and a techno troll could make scene kids...! Do you see my vision??? . . . Ravin is Happy Hardcore and Eddy M is Synth-Pop, that's how troll genetics work, right?

anyway...

i don't think floyd leads a proud life

[libraryofgage]

Steddie brainrot continues to worsen to a concerning degree but here's a crack idea that is absolutely sending me:

Famous Spicy Six in which Jonathon is a director who decides to work on a passion project: a Scooby-Doo movie. His ideal cast is as follows:

Nancy Wheeler (investigative journalist with a few special appearances on crime dramas) as Daphne Blake

Argyle (an actor with a habit of playing small parts; he acts only because he thinks it's fun, so he's not concerned with significant roles) as Shaggy Rogers

Robin Buckley (a well-known voice actor who is more well-known for her social media posts and clap-backs) as Velma Dinkley

Steve Harrington (basketball star who is also more well-known for his social media clap-backs and for being Corroded Coffin's number one fan) as Fred Jones

Eddie Munson (frontman for Corroded Coffin, an insanely popular metal/punk/rock band and "infamous" for unashamedly posting Steve Harrington thirst tweets) as the voice of Scooby-Doo

Corroded Coffin is also creating an entirely new, original soundtrack for the movie

And because I think it's funnier this way, this is also an AU where the Upside Down still happened, so Jonathon just calls his friends up and is like "Okay, so hear me out"

The absolute insanity that breaks out when both the movie and cast are announced because nobody can figure out how Jonathon managed to convince all these powerhouses to join his movie.

The further screaming online after one of the movie promo interviews where a reporter asks how they all agreed to the movie and Nancy hits them with, "Well, Jonathon asked, and he never asks for anything."

Which leads to the discovery that they all knew each other in high school, and the reporter jokingly asks if that means they've all dated each other, too, which leads to Eddie jumping in with absolute delight like, "Well, that's a funny story, there. See, Stevie here dated Nancy, who then dated Jonathon when they broke up, who then dated Argyle after they broke up. And I thought Stevie and Robin were dating, so I was very confused when I saw Robin and Nancy kissing. But then I found out that Robin was a true-blue lesbian, which meant Stevie here was open for the taking, and we've been banging ever since."

and Steve is just sitting there, head in his hands while Robin cackles and decides to tell the reporter all about Steve's "fuck I have a crush on Eddie" crisis

This interview, of course, leads to even more freaking out online and comments like "I know I asked for poly Scooby gang, but this is ridiculous," and "I can't believe that in this, the year of our lord 20xx, ScoobyXFreddy became a canon ship," and "if I had a nickel for every romantic relationship the Scooby gang actors have had with each other, I'd have five nickels, which is way more than any of us fucking expected to have," and "suddenly Eddie Munson's thirst tweets make a lot more sense, but can we talk about Steve Harrington's CC tweets now," and "everyone say thank you to Eddie Munson for revealing that mess of a relationship map," and "finally, the canon lesbian velma and daphne we deserve"

The movie is a box office hit, btw, and bloopers from filming roll with the credits, among which is Eddie Munson making Steve Harrington lose his shit laughing on set while dressed in a Scooby Doo onesie and singing Corroded Coffin songs with his Scooby Voice

[tf2-headcanons-polls-confessions]

How TF2 Mercs would react if I “got” their nose

Soldier - Demand his nose back. With violence. That’s America’s Nose.

Scout - I feel like he’d try to interpret it as a pick up line somehow. (Which, to be fair, what’s a good explanation for doing that?)

Sniper - “okay.”

Spy - *stabs me before I reach his face*

Heavy - AHAH! I get this! Is hilarious!

Medic - *shows me an actual severed human nose, or steals mine. Maybe both*

Demo - If he’s drunk enough, freak out because I stole his nose. If he’s less drunk, then it’s a coin toss between Engineer and Heavy’s reactions.

Engineer - “wtf.”

Pyro - DELIGHTED. They replicate this joke with his friends immediately (may involve actually ripping off noses thinking it's a game)

Ranking the Mercs based on how many times I think they’ve gotten their nose

Soldier - do I need to explain.

Scout - why hasn’t he gotten his nose broken?

Sniper - Falling out of trees, bullies

Spy - lots of dramatic head slams

Heavy - Mostly from his childhood

Medic - thrashing “patients�� & a lack of safety equipment when experimenting

Demo - Got into lots of scrape causing hijinks but it generally didn’t hit him in the face

Engineer - You don’t spend your life in a family built on creating hazardous and ground breaking inventions without getting smacked in the face by wayward machinery at least once

Pyro - Has never broken their nose.

[bet-on-me-13]

The Timeline Shifted, and Sam is conflicted...

So! A Timeline Shift occurs one day (thanks Barry) while Team Phantom are in the Ghost Zone helping Clockwork with a few things. As they are going back to the Human World, Clockwork gives them another cryptic piece of advice.

"Unfortunately the world will not be the same as it once was. Samantha, you will find this especially Jarring, but keep an open mind."

Before they can ask what happened, he shoves them through their own respective Portals, and Sam lands in an Alleyway in Gotham.

She is confused, but a green glowing sticky note appears in front of her telling her 'go to the nearby park, you will see what I was talking about'

She walks over, and sees a lady with Green Skin tending to some flowers. Her head is covered by a Hat, so Sam can't see her face.

They strike up a Conversation, and Sam finds that this Lady is great. She loves taking care of Plants, she hates it when Companies pollute the Earth, and she even has Plant Powers just like Sam!

It occurs to her that she never asked for the Lady's name, so she asks and the lady lifts her Hat to reveal her face. And Sam freezes.

"Oh, sorry for not introducing myself. My name is Pamela Isley."

Thats her Mom's Maiden Name.

This lady has her Mom's Name.

This is her Mom.

Oooooooohhhhhhhhhh shit.

...

Read the tags for extra context

[turtleblogatlast]

[ cw: injury mention / jokes about death / ]

Love when people depict Leo like-

Leo, covered in grievous wounds and having several broken bones: Ew, Staten Island? Anyway lmao that sucked-

Leo, with a paper cut: My LIFE is OVER I am SUFFERING I am DYING I leave all my comics to Mikey, Raph gets my posters and figurines, April can have everything else in my room, I guess Dad can have my swords, Donnie you get NOTHING until you admit I was RIGHT back when-

[correct-hermitcraft-quotes]

Etho: Alright everybody, we are... gathered together here... to get married.