#this is an abusive situation and thats that

[a-bad-case-of-the-stephs]

Stephanie Brown: it’s not my job to protect Crystals sobriety

Also Stephanie Brown: it’s absolutely my job to protect Crystals sobriety

This isn’t inconsistent to me at all btw . I think it makes a lot of sense and says a lot about the evolution of Steph and Crystals relationship.

I just find it super duper interesting. Bc Steph isn’t wrong at all, it isn’t her job, but it was. It was her job for a WHILE! it was her job to protect crystal because no one else (including crystal herself) was going to.

Crystal doesn’t really start to clean herself up until Cataclysm starts, and even then it’s not an automatic thing. Especially not for Steph, who doesn’t move on and accept that Crystals better now, that she’s going to be there for Steph, that Steph doesn’t have to protect her anymore, because that just hadn’t been true for the previous 15 years.

And it shows so evidently over and over again that Steph just doesn’t immediately accept and embrace this development. She supports Crystal all the way, and she loves her mom so goddamn much, but Steph doesn’t slot naturally into the ‘Crystal can be trusted to take care of me / I don’t need to take care of her’ dynamic at ALL!

In the very scene where we start to see Crystal recognizing her shortcomings as Steph’s parent, what I consider the turning point for Crystals recovery, we see how unnatural a relationship with Crystal where Steph doesn’t need to take care of her comes to Steph:

It’s Steph who reaches out to emotionally support Crystal, it’s Steph who crouches down to reassure her, it’s Steph who comforts and takes care of her and literally tucks her in to sleep. Steph is framed in every way as the caretaker, even as Crystal starts to recognize the unfairness of Steph taking on that role instead of Crystal.

Steph hides things from Crystal, she takes care of issues herself. When Crystals brother, Steph’s ‘Uncle Dave’ begins hitting on Steph, she takes care of it herself, and when Spoiler succeeds in sending him to jail, Steph brushes off Crystals question of where Dave went, seemingly finding it unnecessary and superfluous to explain anything to Crystal. After all, Steph makes the connection herself when she directly compares Arthur to Dave in terms of Crystals ‘malfunctioning lie detector’- Steph sees Crystal as just as ineffectual to protect Steph from Dave as Crystal was in protecting Steph from Arthur. It’s not something Steph has to think twice about at all, she deals with the issue herself, and she doesn’t worry Crystal with the details. She takes that burden automatically, because that was Steph’s childhood. Thats her natural state.

Not to mention the framing of this moment alongside another smaller instance of Steph looking out for Crystal, she made her breakfast.

There lots of smaller instances of Steph being unwilling to confide in Crystal, and while some of them come across as run of the mill teen angst- I think there is an understandable undercurrent. Even with their relationship at its very best- Steph can’t fully confide in or communicate effectively with Crystal. Steph usually comes to the conclusion that Crystal won’t get it, that Crystal won’t be able to understand very quickly. Reading this as an extension of how unreliable and just plain out of it Crystal was for the majority of Steph’s childhood, how ‘checked out’ mentally Crystal was feels like a fair read. And Crystals well meaning efforts to talk to Steph usually don’t extend very far past a dismissal from Steph. Crystal gave it a go, but seems to give up and move on fairly easily once stonewalled by Steph.

Steph’s subconscious image of Crystal while she gives birth is that of Crystal at her worst - enabling Arthur’s abuse and completely untrustworthy and unable to determine a dangerous situation.

Another quick example of Steph’s frame of mind when it comes to Crystal and Steph’s assumed responsibility for her:

These are all examples that take place after Crystal has begun to clean herself up and becomes much more aware of how she’d let down Steph in her childhood.

Anyway all that to say, I think it’s actually might be a good sign that Steph takes that angle, that she asserts aloud that maintaining Crystals sobriety isn’t her job. She’s not trying to be cruel, and she’s not heartless, and it definitely doesn’t mean she doesn’t love her mom, it just means maybe Steph has finally really started to come to terms with Crystals growth and their new relationship. Maybe their relationship has reached a point where even when they’re on the outs, when Steph is pissed and scared and upset at Crystal, she’s secure enough overall to trust that Crystal doesn’t need Steph to constantly be there like watching over her, that Crystals recovery isn’t Steph’s responsibility anymore.

Their relationship doesn’t get like instantly healed and it doesn’t mean they’re suddenly great at communicating, the opposite rly, Steph literally runs away to avoid having to be around Crystal, but I think this line says something and I think it’s probably a good something.

[kalkaros-is-the-boss]

While I do generally agree - especially that none of this deflects any blame from James - I do think there are pretty clear indications in canon that Eileen was abusive as well. Abuse isn’t just verbal or physical violence (this is where Tobias would fall, and yes he did abuse Eileen and none of this is to take away from the fact that that most definitely had a huge effect on Eileen's ability to be a parent) but also neglect and keeping your child in a dangerous environment. When we look to the canon for if Eileen was abusive, it’s not enough that we look at her, but we must look at Severus as well. We know that Severus wore clothes that did not fit him (mind you, Eileen has magic) , his hair is not taken care of and a teenager (who also grew up in an abusive household) could tell with one look at him that he was not loved. While her neglect was likely much because of Tobias, it doesn’t change the fact that it happened. Severus grew up in an abusive household, and she was a part of that abuse (Though, by the standards of 60’s - 70’s, it probably would not have been seen as such). That’s not to say that she was a bad person - thats up for anyone’s interpretation - just that she did fail to be a parent. It’s the parent's (both of their) responsibility to keep their child clean, happy and safe. Both Eileen and Tobias failed at that. It’s not like you can only be a victim or an abuser. It’s a messy situation, but it explains a lot about Severus as a character.

I *personally* have the headcanon that Eileen was neglectful/generally disinterested in Severus and his well being, but then to act like it's a canon fact that she was abusive is INSANE

The only things we see of her in canon are: her being abused by her husband and her looking sullen/cross. That's it!!!

And we could theorize that maybe he could have felt resentment toward Muggles because of the abuse, but even so, at no point is there any reference to the idea that Eileen was abusive. Maybe she didn’t pay much attention to her son because she was depressed, maybe she had fallen into a spiral of absolute neglect toward life, maybe she wasn’t the best mother—and I think it’s fine to think of her that way because it’s realistic—but when is it ever implied that she taught him anything? She spoke highly of Slytherin to her son, which can be understood as her simply sharing that she had been in that house. She told him wonderful things about the magical world, which can be interpreted as her reminiscing about her own good experiences in the magical world, especially since everything around her in Spinner’s End was awful.

But there’s a difference between projecting her past glories because she needed to dissociate from her situation of abuse and poverty, and actually radicalizing her son. People, even when coming up with theories, don’t base them on arguments coherent with the story—they reach levels of mental deficiency that I genuinely can’t handle.

[ashlygraves]

i feel like reading Ashley’s crying fits as emotional manipulation falls into either misunderstanding or a bad faith reading of her personality. especially flashback childhood scenes. Ashley legitimately feels like if Andrew is not on board with her he hates her and wants nothing to do with her- look at her social life, the way her mother treats her. sure its not logical but her past experience with people would guide her to that conclusion. *person* doesn’t like something i do/say = i end up alone again. to hear these kinds of words come out of a child’s mouth, a responsible and mentally stable adult’s response would be to hold her hand and guide her through these feelings, and explain to her that the world does not operate in the black and white lenses she views them from…. now when is Ashley ever surrounded by someone of this description. this explanation would need to come from a parental figure, or a role model in the child’s life, somebody the child trusts and looks to for guidance. who is this person for Ashley??? Andrew. another child. not a well rounded, stable, emotionally mature adult with the past experiences to prove these thought patterns wrong. and how does he respond? by giving in. his little sister is crying, upset, and mom and dad don’t like dealing with her and explicitly tell him its his responsibility to placate her and make sure she’s taken care of and listening to them- whenever they decide they’re going to attempt at parenting that is. they never tell him how to do this, all they want is for their daughter to shut up and leave them alone. in this moment, his little sister is crying and that is unacceptable. based on his past experiences, the fastest (and only) way to solve this problem that nobody else wants to deal with is to do what she wants to do. give in. let her have her way. even in the most extreme of circumstances, because neither of them have reliable responsible role models. as they grow up, Andrew builds resentment towards his sister for this, he’s always doing whatever she wants and they’re acting on her whims because they never learned otherwise. misdirected anger that should have been angled at their parents.. so why isn’t it? because their mother was a hostile, volatile person, who punished him for straying an inch out of line. follow orders and keep up appearances, or else. make sure she does the same, or else. expressing any sort of resentment or anger towards anyone but Ashley would have resulted in an outburst from their mother. there is a line, though. Renee may not have given him any sound examples or advice to follow but she did tell him what not to do: resort to physical violence. she knows it’s not a solution to behavior, we can assume she has experience with this because of her reaction to Andrew trying it out on his sister. and in light of their parents deaths, what does Andrew resort to? physical violence. why? because he’s learned that while it may not change Ashley’s behavior (like their mother said), it makes her listen in the moment. and it feels good, to finally let out his frustrations and he won’t be punished for it. this is him ‘acting out’. he finally has the chance to act without punishment and he uses it to do the only thing that he was explicitly told not to do. why does Ashley act the way she does? because she has 2 decades of experience telling her that what she does effects everyone but herself. she has never dealt with punishment, or consequences, in her entire 20 years of life. she has never had to keep up appearances, or stay in line, because she was never given a reason to. Andrew was. soo.. Andrew’s girlfriend breaks up with him, they kill their parents, they’ve been socially isolated and starved for months with the threat of death right around the corner and then they’re both given a chance to take advantage of an object that ultimately would relieve them of consequences.. but what’s the catch? there doesn’t seem to be one, but Andrew knows better. At least in this instance.

[gingersp1ce547]

So when are we as a society gonna talk about when q!pac was with richarlyson in prison that one time and asked for a cellphone because thats where the power is? When are we gonna talk about how in purgatory 2 he told gauxnim he was gonna take out his organs and eat them like cell, not too long after making out with him? When are we gonna talk about how q!pac still calls q!cellbit queridinho sometimes? When are we gonna talk about how one of those times was laughing while leaving him stranded on that island, another was when reading the notes on him in the resistance base, and another was when q!cellbit confronted him during purg 2?

[sideblogdotjpeg]

have been thinking about professor sol even. professor bufo with no clearly discernable lesson plan. sol bufo ostensibly martial arts professor who spent two weeks running a yoga and meditation program and shows up to the next class with crochet hooks for everyone. professor bufo who is technically supposed to be assigning grades to students but hasnt given anyone less than an A because "i think they worked really hard and they did a great job :)" (referring to the ugliest and most malformed pot holder anyone has laid eyes upon in their life). professor bufo who is on his way to cluelessly kickstart the sexual awakening of about half the cohort of the academys new students. sol bufo adjunct professor who is gone half the year and his first class back is so immediately and easily baited into going into a long tangent about how cool his friends are. sol who is pretty sure hes easily the most useless professor on campus and almost cries when he sees his little desk overflowing with thank you notes at the end of the year. professor bufo absolutely fucking gloriously hot in the tightest little sweater vest because there were faculty complaints when he wore a crop top to class.

[shitpostingkats]

Feel free to ignore this, but I have to ask since I've been rewatching yugioh 5ds and you're one of the very few blogs I've searched that mentioned Satellite Bros age order. I'd love to hear your thoughts on this and if you know other blogs that talk about it.

WHY WOULD I EVER IGNORE THIS ITS ONE OF MY FAVORITE THINGS. THANK YOU SO MUCH <3

*takes deep breath* ok SO

Word of god canon is that the age order is Jack (19), Yusei (18), and Crow (17), at the start of the series.

But while you can make an argument that Yusei would have records, people who knew when he was born, or at least a birth certificate, Jack and Crow are orphans. If Jack is indeed 19, then he would have been roughly a year old when Zero Reverse happened, likely killing his parents, at the very least destroying a massive amount of city infrastructure. You tell me Jack knows his birthday and I press (X) to doubt.

Crow is apparently canonically younger than Yusei, but. His parents also died in Zero Reverse.

This. This straight up does not work.

Also Yusei is shown to be a baby when Zero Reverse occurred and if Crow's parents did indeed die in Zero Reverse when he was under a year old he there is NO WAY he would live much longer than that. That's just. How babies work.

CROW HOGAN HAS TO BE OLDER THAN YUSEI.

I will die on this hill. I watched the show thinking Crow was the middle brother and then learned their apparent canon ages after because he has to be older than Yusei for any of his backstory to make sense. Konami can fight me on this.

NARRATIVELY they are the middle and youngest child. Jack has Past motifs, Crow is Present, and Yusei is Future. Jack and Yusei's whole dynamic is the most oldest sibling vs youngest sibling drama possible.

As for Jack, I always like to think it was his birthday like, a week before Yusei leaves Satellite, because being a Newly Minted Twenty Year Old explains everything about his personality.

[tysonfurybattlepass]

lancer hot take GO

1. CRIMINALLY underrated as a key player in the narrative. so often in fan content, he’s relegated to comic relief when in reality his character arc is the fucking CO-FOCAL POINT of ch1 (alongside susie’s)

but where susie learns that opposition isn’t always the answer, and it can lead to her hurting people she loves, lancer learns that the authority figure in his life isn’t omnipotent and perfect and he can stand up for what he knows is just. he can question the adult in his life he can BE HIS OWN PERSON and he doesn’t have to feel like he’s not good enough. fuck. not personal or anything prommy (lying)

2. i think he should be allowed to KILL. queen will livestream it. shit would be funny as fuck

[mischiefsystem]

The anti psych people who say you shouldn't call yourself by personality disorder named are doing the same thing as people who say you cant call yourself queer bc its a slur tbh

[deathbysports]

so tired of the whole "bowman's not even a good gm" stuff. THATS NOT THE POINT OR THE MAIN ISSUE AT HAND. The issue is that Bowman covered up abuse and ruined Beach's career. In a situation like this, who the fuck cares if Bowman is a good gm or not? How about we focus on the actual issue at hand?

[dayurno]

Kevjean that spend years without talking to each other out of the pure irrational fear of not having anything in common now that they are both free of Riko – If they don't look then the change isn't there

AGH....... theyre so fucking stupid but i think so much about how important riko is to their relationship and how much of a space he could be given even as a dead man if kevin and jean don't make a point out of ignoring him...... but how can you rid a relationship of its primal creator if its also both parties' first and worst abuser........ how do you get rid of riko without getting rid of each other..... its really. ah

i think a big part of kevjean to me is that both of their separate, new support systems (the trojans and the foxes in this case, though i use the term support system loosely) absolutely dont agree with this relationship at all GHDFGDHGJDFG when all your friends think your relationship is a grudge you cant let go of..... when everyone in your life thinks the only reason you could stay together is out of a misguided sense of codependence........ when no one wants you together and no one understands and it feels like youre a cult of two :) when id rather remember every time ive ever been wronged and abused than let go of you :) when you look at him and you think hes just something you invented when you were scared and needed to be rescued :))))

anyway heres my kevjean vision moodboard

[fairy-ganj-mother]

reacting like everyone is out to get you turns into a negative feedback loop so fast. you think people are conspiring against you, so you react in an accusatory way, so they raise an eyebrow at you, which makes the conspiratorial feelings you perceive worse even though they're just confused why ur acting a fool like that

[lesbianlenas]

the casebook being like does setting the minimum age for marriage at 18 w no exceptions go too far? um no. i’m sorry but there is no reason why u cannot wait until 18 to get married. i personally think it should be even higher than 18 bc 18 is a number that was arbitrarily decided by men as to when an individual is an “adult” based on nothing whatsoever and no 18 yr old is truly mature enough to enter a marriage. and i think it is truly disgusting (and also why i have not supported it for yrs now) that the ACLU argued that setting the age of marriage at 18 denies a fundamental right to marriage like fuck off you are legit supporting child marriage. so true bestie that’s totally a civil liberty!!!! if a child wants to marry so bad they can wait until they are 18 and there is not a single reason to think otherwise than defending pedophilia and exploitation of children and in particular girls.

[swallowtail-ageha]

Fastest way to sum up my characterization of saint adeline is the lesbian version of the protagonist girl of the tam lin ballad who hears that there is a fairy in the woods who rapes and robs women and immediately lifts her skirt up her knees and runs into the forest

[snekdood]

if you dont vote for biden you're a dumbass who only cares about their image. swallow your shit pride and vote you utter fucking dipshit.

[whatcouldpossiblyg0wr0ng]

its so weird to talk to adults now about my dad now because every time i tell them that every half a year or so my dad tells me what a shit person i am, how im never going to change, and how he pretends it never happens and denies everything he said (even though i KNOW he said it) in a plausable manner the next time i see him (among other things) theyre all like bro. Thats emotional and verbal abuse and gaslighting and im like damn okay wish id told some teachers in high school the first three times it happened then. Mandatory reporting to the literal government would have sorted this shit out years ago

[bitethetablet]

i haven’t really said it outright on here but no i don’t like that guy i haven’t really watched him in like a year

i’ve had alot of people not recognize the username reference so i’m turning it into my own thing rather than a him thing