#this is a perfectly normal not at all unhinged post what are you talking about????

[skitskatdacat63]

The way he's not even meant to be in frame but is like, alright, let me gesticulate as much as humanely possible

[blessphemy]

Heehee, I'm really enjoying the mystery of all the seemingly disconnected things you tag as 'translation state.' You're making me want to read it <3

i'm hoping to create my translation state quotes hall of fame post soon, this book is actually a situational comedy masquerading as a political thriller star crossed romance with alien cannibalism garnish. you know, normal stuff.

i would recommend reading Ancillary Justice first though! first book in the Imperial Radch trilogy. then the rest of the trilogy, Ancillary Sword and Ancillary Mercy. i am dead serious i think the Imperial Radch trilogy is a modern sci fi classic, building on the sci fi canon that comes before it in such a fantastic way. Ancillary Justice is an absolutely beautifully put together work, master craft shit. no notes. (I do have notes on the structure of Translation State.) i have literally studied AJ's structure like I'm trying to dissect it and it's insanely clean. I can only think of like, maybe 1 thing I'd like to ask the author about regarding her choice of how she executed the ending. Leckie did you have Breq shoot the gun without public witnesses because it would've fucked up the logistics of the rest of a trilogy? part of me can't help but think the ending of AJ would've worked better as a final public showdown and it highkey felt like that's what it was building toward until—but on the other hand the ending as written mirrors the hidden situation with Awn so perfectly—anyway it makes me rabid.

GOD oh my god that scene with Lieutenant Awn (iykyk) when Awn dropped her mic on Anaander and then Anaander dropped her mic on Awn and I knew what was coming next and the whole arc of the book all clicked together right in the beating heart of the story I about screamed I had to put the book down and pace it out for a while before picking it back up.

the Imperial Radch trilogy punched its entire fist through my brain and i never truly recovered. it was everything i wanted. if you let me start talking about it i won't shut up for about 30-45 minutes minimum. it can be a little dense and I gather the tone/style is not for everyone but boy fuckin' howdy does it hit for the people it hits. every single character is my problematic fave. every single character is fucking unhinged in their own special way. <3 (except Queter. who may have built a bomb but she did nothing wrong ever in her life.)

Provenance and Translation State are in the same universe as the trilogy, but follow (mostly) different casts of characters. i suppose you could read Translation State first if you feel like a rebel, and I'd be fascinated to hear how it reads without the prior context. but also I really think it would land better if you read the trilogy first.

[halfratsalready]

The Unhinged Jack x Wanderlust Conspiracy Board Explained

A few days ago I posted this silly conspiracy board I made for a slideshow night with my friends where I talked about how Ubisoft loves to deny Jack x Wanderlust and everyone seemed to like it so here’s an in-depth (and I mean in-depth) explanation of everything on it.

We start, of course, with Si’ha Nova and the Traveler, and Wanderlust wearing his dad’s cape at the beginning of Canned Heat because it’s super cute.

And you can’t talk about this ship without the moment from Majesty that perfectly mirrors the moment from Save Your Tears because genuinely why would they do this if they didn’t want people to ship these two? (Rainbow flag added for ✨flavor✨)

I also thought it was worth mentioning that the only time we ever actually hear any of these characters speak across all 14 lore playlist maps is literally Wanderlust calling out Jack’s name.

And now it’s time for the part that I like to call Ubisoft’s crusade against a monster of their own creation (because look at those last two points and tell me they didn’t do this to themselves. You can’t.)

Now in making this I couldn’t help but wonder if maybe Ubisoft isn’t being as harsh on the ship as we’ve been thinking, because “they’re such good friends” and “best friends” with a thumbs up automatically reads as very sarcastic and joking to me, like all the memes about “historians will say they were close friends.”

Then there’s the infamous in’s and out’s New Years post, but what I hadn’t picked up on until I saw this screenshot from Twitter is that the inclusion of “normalize being evil” on the in’s list is rather suspicious and that, according to Just Dance, “this was posted by Night Swan’s army.” So I feel like that’s worth mentioning, because it casts a different light on all the other things on the lists. As in including Jack Rose in the in’s list since he’s the only one she didn’t corrupt yet and she wants to do that this year? And putting stanning Jacklust on the out’s because she’s evil and doesn’t want us to have nice things? Not too sure but hey, if someone better at analyzing things wants to look into that, I’d be down to read it.

(I also think it’s worth mentioning that “worrying about getting a Megastar” is included in the out’s list when the tweet just before that one is encouraging players to get Megastar on Zero to Hero, so some more contradictions there, but that might not mean anything, given that Night Swan’s whole thing is perfection and I feel like she would definitely be in favor of worrying over getting Megastar.)

Plus there’s the pretty popular belief that they’re just pointing out how stupid of a ship name Jacklust is, but I’m personally not at all sold on this being the reason, even if Jacklust is a stupid ship name. (I told my friends the ship name during this presentation and one of them said “Really? Wanderrose was right there.”)

Lastly, I threw Night Swan in there because of the theory that Ubisoft is denying Jack x Wanderlust because the Traveler is Jack’s father. Now, I have opinions about this theory and I hope it’s not true for obvious reasons, but I feel like if it is, it’s a serious oversight on Ubisoft’s part.

Firstly, if they’re half siblings why did they recreate the move from Save Your Tears in Majesty? Seems odd to have half siblings recreate a pretty iconic romantic duet moment.

There’s also the fact that we can clearly see that Wanderlust takes physical traits from each of his parents - his mother’s blue skin and his father’s dark hair. If the Traveler is Jack’s dad, why don’t they share any physical characteristics? At the very end of the beta for Sweet Dreams (spoiler?) we see Night Swan with green eyes, unlike the yellow eyes she has in the rest of the dances we see her in. (While this could just be an older design choice, I personally interpreted this as meaning that her eyes were green before she went evil and then they turned yellow.) In all of his character artwork, Jack’s eyes are green, which I take as meaning that this is a trait he got from his mother. So I personally feel like it only makes sense for his father to have red hair (and we’ve got plenty of options to pick from with that criteria).

But hey, that’s just a theory… I don’t need to finish that part, you’re already thinking it. Thanks for reading my insane ramblings!

[starlightseraph]

honoured to have been summoned, comrades 🫡

@dtmsrpfcringe

those screenshots are truly unhinged.

- ever heard of candid photos? ones that aren't posed or staged to have the person look a specific way? ones that capture the essence of a moment and have a more organic feel? ones that can celebrate the mundane? is it abnormal for family/ friends/loved ones to take candid in-the-moment pictures? no. or if it is, then i guess everyone i know, all the people i've seen doing this, and every person who's ever posted a non-posed photo of their loved one is a creep.

- appreciation and kindness for everyone but him? let me refer you back to this: "happy birthday to the best person most of us will ever know. the kindest of people, the cleverest of people, the funniest of people and the best dad of (many) people. sometimes i wonder what i do to deserve him..." and this is only a selected example, not an exhaustive list.

- hijacking his party and refusing to acknowledge that it was his? the card they posted was literally for a combined party. a 90th birthday, and given that david's not 90, but he's in his early 50s while she's almost 40, and it's not anywhere near either of their real birthdays, it's fairly obvious that it was meant for both of them. as you would know, if you payed attention to the goddamn card.

- normalising abuse? girl where. you have no knowledge of their private communication and boundaries, what they've talked about/agreed on, what they find mildly annoying and what they are genuinely upset by. poking fun, egging on, banter, all are perfectly healthy. if he's truly disturbed by anything, it is his responsibility to communicate that, and her responsibility to respect it. but these interactions are normally not public. they've almost certainly discussed social media sharing outside of the few snippets we've seen. it's fairly safe to assume, then, that any conversations they've had on-camera apply to those specific instances. "not right now" as opposed to "not ever". and a reminder that we literally do not know these people. you can't draw a diagram of an entire house by peering through a few windows.

- about the criminal offence bit, i can tell you, with absolute certainty, that no one is going to report anyone to the police for taking a candid photo in a kitchen. i promise, it's not illegal, by any stretch of the law, for a wife to take a photo of her husband standing at a counter. it may be technically illegal in some places to distribute those photos without the person's consent, but we, as outsiders, have no way of knowing and therefore shouldn't assume that she didn't get consent. i have several lawyers in my very close family, and i can already hear the legalese they’d break into to counter this argument.

the most important point i want to make is that they are married, and have been for a dozen years, and have known each other for years more than that. they understand each other, they probably know each other better than anyone. they certainly know each other better than we do. when you get to that point with someone, you generally don't need to confirm every single thing you do. in most cases, you can get a sense of what's ok and what's not. it's possible that georgia has some difficulty with that, as she's neurodivergent, but in that case the boundaries just need to be clarified for her. if she's unsure, she can ask, if she's unaware, he can tell her. because human relationships go both ways, boundaries need to be communicated, understood, and consistently adjusted. only then are they even tangible concepts that can dictate social interactions. and smaller things or individual moments can exist freely, without a giant rubric attached. they're both adults, they both have agency, and they both have access to support. trust that they're making good choices for themselves and each other, because you have no real reasons to think otherwise.

[lyriquette]

Remnants of RWBY: Vytal Festival - Day 3: Alternate Universes

@remnants-of-rwby-events

The next offering is part of the Becoming AU, the Crack Taken Seriously fic where Ruby is mistakenly believed to be a Beacon professor by the rest of the school and Ozpin rolls with it. Antics ensue. But you don't need to read it to understand this chapter, which will probably be posted 2 weeks after to AO3.

-------------------------------------------

Becoming AU / Perspective: Jaune

After Forever Fall, Cardin makes the mistake of disparaging Crocea Mors within Ruby's earshot.

------

It had been an...awkward couple of weeks after Forever Fall. 

He had expected Cardin to leave him alone after saving his life. He did not expect him to try and get all friendly instead. It was just extremely awkward, having Cardin try to include him in all of his team's activities and you know pretend like the whole blackmailing stuff never happened.

What's worse was that Cardin was genuinely sincere about these invitations too, which made it really hard to decline.

His team noticed too. And Nora was really getting hyped up on breaking Cardin's legs this time around, and no one believed him when he said that Cardin was trying to be nice instead of bullying him.

Which was why he was in this situation now. In the middle of the hallway, stuck making small talk with Cardin and the rest of his team, under the watchful eye of Ren and Nora a classroom away.

As for Pyrrha, well, she was suffering with him. Even her normally brilliant smile started to dim after fifteen minutes of this awkward situation - what could she do when Cardin was genuinely trying to be nice?

Well, at least his team won't think Cardin's trying to bully him anymore.

“I’m telling you that I’m perfectly fine with a sword and shield. It’s what I practice with, it’s what I know,” Jaune said wearily, mostly just wanting this conversation to end.

Unfortunately, Cardin didn’t want to comply with his silent wishes.  

“Look. You could definitely do better. Your sword and shield’s boring, outdated, and probably needs to retire in a museum somewhere. I know a couple shops where you can get a discou-” Any further words Cardin wanted to say seem to have gotten caught in his throat. Cardin's gaze was no longer on him but past his arm, where he caught a couple of red fading petals blowing in from behind.

That’s when Ruby just walked past him - from wherever she came from - and straight towards Cardin. He couldn't see her face, but from the way she was trembling, Ruby was not happy.

“Y-you’re kidding, right?” The normal bubbliness in Ruby’s voice was replaced with so much incredulity and anger that he believed Ruby had beef with Cardin over something unrelated entirely. Enough that Pyrrha and he immediately walked to their side, instinctively prepared to defuse the situation. 

At least until she dropped the bombshell.

“..Y-you’re seriously insulting Crocea Mors?” 

Seeing the intensity in Ruby’s steel eyes was scary - almost like watching a cat about to pounce a mouse. And Cardin clearly thought so too because he stumbled trying to step back and knocked into the wall behind him. 

It always confused him as to why Cardin would try his very best to avoid Ruby after his duel with her, despite Ruby losing that fight. Actually, it was a little funny that Mr. Tough Guy was so afraid of shy, cheerful Ruby.

...But looking at the slightly unhinged look in the younger girl's eyes, he’s starting to have an idea why. 

“I-I-I wasn’t…” Cardin stuttered to the amazement of the other members of his team. 

Ruby forwardly just stepped up and placed her hands on Cardin’s shoulders, which looked a little comical given that the guy had over a foot of height on her. 

“...Crocea Mors isn’t a weapon that you can ridicule,” Ruby whispered in dead seriousness, “It survived at least three generations in a Huntsman’s family. It survived the Great War. And it’ll probably survive you too.” 

He’s…pretty sure Ruby didn’t say ‘and that might be sooner rather than later' but oh boy did he feel it. And from the deer-in-headlights look Pyrrha’s giving him, she felt it too. 

“H-h-hey. Come on now. Let's not fight over that antique -” Russel remarked with a genial smile, sliding between Cardin and Ruby to try and make peace. And that smile wilted immediately after Ruby turned to him with a blank expression. Hell, even his mohawk looked like it wilted too. 

Gotta give him props though. 

What a true friend. 

“That antique was made with the best that Vacuoian steel-forging and Vale’s blacksmithing had to offer!” Ruby scathingly replied as she pushed Cardin away and stalked over to Russel, “Even today, blacksmiths and fabricator machines could only hope to match Crocea Mors’s durability and sharpness. 

“You wanna pit Shortwings against it for a couple hundred swings?” Ruby stomped a foot down and swung her arm to punctuate her point, “I will bet any amount of Lien that Shortwings shatters first!” 

Russell vigorously shook his head as quickly as he could - like a grade schooler knowing he did wrong. Unfortunately for him, it's clear Ruby was determined to hammer the lesson home.

“More importantly,” Ruby lowered her voice once more, “that antique had more thought put into it than most weapons today.”

“Crocea Mors was created specifically with the hope that its wielder would survive the Great War,” Ruby confidently declared, “And to do that, it was made to be both strong and reliable. Do you know what sand or water does to intricate mechanisms? It gums them up and then makes them useless.”

“Now of course, I built Crescent Rose here with a wicking system to deal with that,” Ruby affectionately added with a pat to the collapsed weapon hiding behind her cape, “but back then, who would know how to make that kind of mod?”

“Furthermore, whatever joints Crocea Mors had were made so well that the shield appears seamless when deployed,” Ruby lectured on, clearly calmer after her brief aside about her own weapon. It still didn’t stop her from prodding Russel’s chest every couple words though. “And as strong as every other part of the shield too.” 

So entranced he and Pyrrha were by this super assertive version of Ruby that they didn’t even realize Cardin and the rest of his team had already skedaddled. Only when Russel desperately gazed over at where Cardin was - and the indignant disbelief in the guy’s eyes - did they realize that the rest of team CRDL was just gone.

“Do you know which kingdoms preferred guerilla and ambush tactics the most? Mantle and Mistral!" Ruby continued on, gaining steam again, “Under those circumstances, a sheath that turns into a heater shield is a brilliant idea! Not to mention there’s a robust spring-loaded mechanism that can deliver a counter blow when the shield is deployed or even create a makeshift barricade to block a narrow passage.” 

"As for the sword, its excellence speaks for itself," Ruby then huffed as she closed in on a shrinking Russel, "but if you had any proper weapon knowledge, we wouldn’t be here right now."

“Keeping an edge that keen over three generations - an edge that can cleanly decapitate an Ursa Major in one swing - is a testament to both the blacksmith’s metalworking and Jaune’s family who maintained it well.”

…Well, now he was feeling guilty again about stealing Crocea Mors from the family.  

“Heck! Given how old this "antique" is, chances are it cut down someone who would’ve ended up killing your ancestors, giving you the opportunity to say such ignorant words today. ” Ruby continued on, “Really! You should be calling Crocea Mors your Granddadd- Wait Pyrrha, what are you-” 

Pyrrha had begun pulling the younger girl up and away from Russel, elbows latched underneath the other girl’s armpits.

Yeah, probably a good place to end things.

It still didn’t stop Pyrrha or himself from trying to stifle a laugh at the uncharacteristic Yang-like insult.

Definitely sisters, alright.

Still staring at Russel and being restrained by Pyrrha, Ruby frowned as she nudged her head towards him, “Come on, Jaune! He’s insulting your weapon! You should be defending Crocea Mors's honor!” 

“Errr…Ruby, I actually didn’t know all tha-”

Pyrrha shook her head violently, mouthing the word no. 

Russel, from the corner of his eyes, looked at him with an expression of gratefulness. 

Ruby slowly turned her head towards him. 

Oh. Crap.

[tagedeszorns]

(Violetbirdie here) I think it's complicated due to a variety of issues. 40k as a franchise is huge, but it isn't the sort of thing that tends to have overlap with tumblr type fanspaces. It also doesn't help that 40k is a fractured fandom featuring tons of different factions, so it's not like a standard fandom where there are main characters and a main story that people will always flock to. The primarchs are the closest thing we have to that, which is why there is naturally more content for them. In addition, fandom itself is in a bit of a flux state and has been ever since the 2018 nsfw ban which caused a lot of people to leave for twitter, which is now undergoing its own huge changes right now (and I just hate twitter on principle).

I suppose the one thing I think would help, would be somehow getting the 40k tumblresque fandom space more consolidated as a whole. Like, somehow have a blog that is popular for all factions that posts headcanons about everything, thus getting people interested in parts they don't normally think about. Because 40k is a huge time investment to learn about. I've been listening to audiobooks for what feels like nonstop for over a month, and even then I could only ever feel confident telling people about Emperor's Children. So it naturally is harder for new people to get into the fandom and focus on some of the smaller things because there is just so much. It's almost how I view your blog. I check it daily for fun art/headcanons/just general character stuff, and you made me more interested in some of the captains and such. But even then, you have your focuses. So a space even more general where someone would reblog art from everything 40k would likely be nice? Maybe I just miss the livejournal days of fandom. As far as more engagement, I think having silly things like character weeks which encourages people to draw or write or talk about specific aspects is a huge benefit. It sets a schedule and makes people feel like they are shouting less into the void.

But as someone new here, maybe its my weird perspective, but I don't feel like things are getting less popular. If anything, from just checking AO3, it seems like things are only getting more popular for less of the reddit type and more for the Tumblr wanting to see hot dudes and their complicated feelings type. Also more people are getting into 40k in this side of the space through rogue trader. Like people I never talked to about 40k are starting to look into the series because they played Baldurs Gate 3, and needed a new RPG to play, and conveniently Rogue Trader is filling that for them. So, I'm optimistic if anything. Sorry about the long ramble! Just kinda dumping my thoughts out.

I love Tumblr because, unlike Twitter or Bluesky, it allows for way longer, way more elaborately structured posts. I love it when artists don't just slap their pics into a post and be done with it, but instead add stuff like maybe "I read this book, here's a quote, and it gave me this mighty need to draw this". Or "please listen to this music here while looking at my pic! It goes perfectly with it!". Or just a multi-paragraph-essay (preferably very unhinged) about the character in the upper left corner.

This in advance, so you can see I'm totally with you on the "miss Lifejournal"-thing, because blogs are so much better than just 500 characters, four pics and nothing else. And why I think Tumblr is a very good replacement for Lifejournal.

The multitude of Tumblr-blogs with their many different angles are such a treat and provide such a rich ecosystem! I follow artists posting exclusively admech-stuff, others solely Drukhari, some writers focussing on just one Astartes Legion ... it's phantastic and the depth of their niche-knowledge is mindblowing.

I agree with you that this will be overwhelming for new fans coming from rather monolithic stuff like Rogue Trader. And the key to keeping those new people involved and making them feel welcome is showing them all this variety without scaring them away.

Maybe this new feature Tumblr is working on, can be helpful here. I haven't read much about it yet, but it seems the "Community"-feature has the potential to bundle stuff in a way that's more approachable for new and old fans alike. Maybe there's room for your idea of having "character weeks" (I like that! Sounds very MacDonald's. I'll have Fabius with extra pickles, please! 😁).

I'm sharing your optimism that both the new games and maybe the new series/movies will bring a lot of new fans over and some of them may even stick around. I am a bit wary that there's the possibility of a MCU-situation starting to build up, but since Warhammer-lore is in a constant state of flux anyways this might just add some spice to the mix.

So, yeah, hope for the darkest of futures!

[melanodis]

*EidoLotus voice* M... More...? More Natah...? 👉👈

FR FR i am SO curious about her. What is ur design rationale what r ur headcanons for her please please elaborate... I wanna knoweee

- Leo 🦁

really old doodle ft nimbus (my friend's mimic oc) yayyy

The doodles above don't really do her much justice but I wanted a really quick mockup. She has the little elbow feathers on the sides of her head :)

@leolithe

She's like a fish or some kind of creature to me, at least in her more sentient form.

I do really like the interpretation of her as a system but I don't do it myself because I'm simply not educated enough on the topic nor have much firsthand experience with them in order to comfortably do so.

She also occasionally visits the drifter camp and has a little hangout area in the cave just for her.

Post TNW she's a lot more... loose? Unhinged, even? Faced with the realization that you have free now and can do whatever you want. With how Hunhow sits in the oceans of Uranus it makes me associate sentients with being aquatic so I like to think she just... dives into the streams of the camp or even in Cetus to catch fish to eat. See above image.

More rambling under the cut.

Along the same vein, she also struggles with having to remember she does in fact have free will now. She doesn't HAVE to play mission control 24/7. I imagine outside of the little pod she has on Lua, she has an entire nice little living area all to herself, adorned with porcelain, gold, and many lush plants. Something that even the Orokin would gawk at. A library full of texts long thought lost, many in dead languages from old Earth.

For more rationale towards my design; I wanted her to sort of embrace her sentient nature more, maybe looking kind of aggressive and colorful. Like a bird. But she's a big sweetheart, really.

Doing "human" things to break up the monotony of her previous life. Even something as simple as making tea from a kettle. Ballas' line, "Her kind feel no pain". She wants to prove him wrong so badly. To drink tea, burn her tongue a little and this silly human mistake makes her feel alive. That little flinch and shock down her spine as her nerves recover. Maybe a little wave, "oops".

She's genuinely so tragic. Spending millennia as a pawn just to switch hands multiple times. The deception, the manipulation, the gaslighting. Then finally being freed and just... not knowing what to do with yourself because you can't remember what it was like without being manipulated, by facets of constructed selves in your mind or by external forces. gggggghuhhhhh.

While my Natah still kinda takes from facets of Margulis, it's more of a like, uncanny valley type way. It looks like her but something is Off.

More or less Lotus is used to talking to brick walls. So for someone to actually actively listen to her (and not roll their eyes, shrug it off) and engage in conversation is actually insane to her. Like reading off a script your entire life and suddenly being forced to scramble together your own coherent sentences. Narrating her every thought in her head like the silly machine she is. "Oh god, it's been 2.3 seconds and I'm sweating bullets. She's looking at me. I haven't formulated a sentence. It's been 3 seconds now. She's raising her eyebrow awaiting a response. Um. UM." An awkward grin.

I have taken to kinda smashing her like barbies with Eudico, with what I have dubbed "mom squared (mom²)", two people learning through each other what it actually means to be human. Eudi retelling what it's like to be organic (originally), Natah taking notes. What a "normal" family would've been like. It's all completely new to her but it's so interesting to contrast against her own.

Something cool I found from decompiling her model is that the Lotus helmet perfectly covers the face seams on her sentient form.

Aaaand an excerpt from my notes that I've held onto forever.

-

Something something about Eudi being warm and Natah being cold and comparing that their bodies are both synthetic but completely different architectures. Themes of Corpus technology in sterile white rooms whereas Sentients live and thrive in those warm (colored, i doubt drifting in the dead of space is warm lmao), organic Sentient murex.

It's like. How the Warframes are more or less just tech meat. Sentients too, created by the Orokin, would probably follow the same flavor of design.

"Time and time again, you've had to rebuild yourself with nothing but scraps... why not change things up sometime?"

Eudico shrugs.

"Why don't you? You can be anything you want."

"I guess we've both grown too comfortable in our bodies, then."

"There's pieces of my parents in me. Like my face, that defines me as a person, gives me an identity and paired with a unique voice to match. But that's about all I have left that's mine."

"I think I get it. It would be.. rude, to get rid of those features."

"More sentimental value than anything, Really. Plus, I like my red hair. It's.. quite rare in Corpus society."

And Natah continues to cling onto Margulis, because no matter her form we still see facets of her.

[pirdmystery]

sylvain jose gautier for the ask game

oiuhgggghhhggggggggggg…

first impression: it is important to note that i literally got into 3h because i knew it as “that game with sylvain in it.” i didn’t even know what to expect from him other than that. so when dimitri introduces him as “a bit of a skirt chaser” or whatever i’m like lol ok?? what??

impression now: if anyone is interested… go through my sylvain tags to get a feel for this. i’ve been spiraling lately. suffice to say i am SO sick about him like more and more every day. christ alive talk about a guy with problems. the way he is so smart and so soft but he is absolutely determined not to let anyone know either of those things… noooo I’m actually just a wacky little guy don’t worry about me… i’m just the comic relief… doing fine… yeah i know i said “burn until we meet again” and “see you in hell i guess” but that’s just because I’m being soooooo funny and normal… i’ve also never cried in my life btw…

fav moment: there are so many blink and you miss it unhinged sylvain moments in this damn game. i’ve talked about it recently but the fact. that if he does badly on a lesson and you pick console instead of critique he gets really bitchy and pissed off. like jesus christ. sorry for trying to extend you some gentleness buddy will not make that mistake again.

also let’s take a moment to recognize the iconic “it killed my brother and now it’s mine.” certified sylvain moment

idea for a story: i have billions. i never stop emotionally tormenting this man. got a 20 years post cf angstfest about he and felix coming. beyond that i am obsessed with the prospect of a sylvain/mercedes/ingrid ot3 and someday i am going write a fic with them that isn’t just the extensive smut that currently exists in my google docs

fav relationship: i have got to go with ingrid. i do very much ship sylgrid romantically and they make me sooooooooo unwell but even if i didn’t their friendship is just so important to me in a way i really struggle to put words to. the way they understand each other perfectly but that makes it almost harder for them to get through to each other because of all the layers of bullshit they have built up around the true version of themselves that the other sees. they bump heads a lot but the way it’s so obvious that under whatever they might be clashing about and the baggage of their years of friendship there is this foundation of unconditional love that is not going anywhere no matter what oh god suddenly i cant see the screen and there’s something happening to my eyes oh god

a fun thing about sylvain is that i could write equally unhinged paragraphs about his relationships with mercedes and dorothea!! something about girls he would normally flirt with and their response is :) hey i see you btw! and sylvain is forced to crumble like a little baby. i cannot get enough of that shit. get seen idiot. i’ve also been known to enjoy some yurivain and dimivain and claudevain for not dissimilar reasons.

unpopular opinion: once again idk what is popular!! i feel like my shipping tastes with him are not the most popular but everyone is nice to me when i talk about them so. it’s all good

favorite headcanon: most bisexual man on the planet. i also love making him work service jobs lmao. he works at subway in my sylgrid fic but there are so many other things i want to subject him to. he should have to sing happy birthday to people at applebees. he should be a barista at a shitty coffee shop. mostly this is because it’s funny but i also think would be deeply in character for sylvain to plant himself somewhere far below his skill level and languish there as if there were nothing else he could do about it.

tysm for letting me go off about him… man. sylvain.

[musical-chick-13]

Reading your posts about "toxic" couples and female villains has me thinking I don't watch any TV programs with any such characters and I want to. Do you have recommendations?

Ohhh, you have come to the right place, my friend. (This is very long I'm so sorry.)

I'm going to do the opposite of what I normally do start with my Number One Recommendation (as in, I think this show is most likely to be the kind of thing you're looking for), which is Search Party starring Alia Shawkat. I really would suggest going into this one blind because it is a ride. This is basically "Everyone Gets Worse: The Show," including one of the most complex and effective corruption arcs of a female character I've ever seen! And Dory/Drew, the main couple, is the most batshit deranged romance. I'm a Jaime/Cersei stan and Dory and Drew somehow come across as worse.

SPEAKING OF JAIME/CERSEI. I like GoT more than I like Search Party. And I like Cersei more than...every character ever. She's not the Final Antagonist™, but she's a formidable presence throughout the show, with such a rich interior emotional world that I always learn something new about her every time I think about her!! And Jaime/Cersei is THE unhealthy romance for me; it is the standard by which I measure every unhinged, toxic couple. People are going to tell me not to recommend this because season 8 is bad, but my hot take of the century is that the final season/ending was overall perfectly fine. Also some love to my girl Melisandre, who is also complex in an unpalatable way that's underappreciated by fandom.

Also going to plug Fleming: The Man Who Would Be Bond, which I think is where my love for Toxic Ships™ can be traced back to. Ann and Ian's relationship is fucked up.

Elementary has a female Moriarty, who doesn't actually show up in that many episodes, but her influence and romantic history with Sherlock is felt throughout the show. He even calls her "the great love of [his] life." Miss Sherlock also has a female Moriarty, who is delightfully creepy.

This is ALSO my daily pitch for 2001 anime Noir, which barely feels like an anime if I'm honest. So if you're not an anime person please don't let that put you off. Altena is THE anime villain of all time, and every single other tragic villain wants what she has. She's extremely competent and is probably the only example I've seen of a villain who claims they're doing the right thing and I genuinely believe she thinks that. (Looking at you [character name redacted].) All the women in this are fucked up, actually, and have very fucked-up relationships with each other! This includes the central couple (though they do eventually get on the same page), but ALSO there's a minor, 2-episode dynamic that stays thoroughly fucked-up the whole way through, I'm talking fighting-to-the-death, I Traumatized You As A Child Which Profoundly Affected Me So Much I Became Obsessed With You/I'm Afraid Of You But Will Still Embrace You While Attacking You (someone other than me please ship this please, PLEASE I'M BEGGING).

I also can never recommend Chainsaw Man enough. I won't say I ship the toxic couple (unlike the others I've mentioned), but it's very complex and furthers the themes of the story and reverberates through it in a way where I really appreciate that it's there. It's a big part of the reason why the story is as excellent and hard-hitting as it is. Also one of the most frightening female villains I've ever seen. (And also Aki/Himeno, another codependent ship. Though that one's pretty tame in comparison to the other dynamics I've mentioned.)

There is also Doctor Who, with recurring villain Missy and the former-friends-turned-enemies-with-heavy-subtext The Doctor and The Master. Kissing your opponent to unbalance them! I don't approve of what you're doing, but I'll always forgive you! Everything I am is because of your influence! No one else can kill you except me! I'll try to be good for a while because you're my friend! They have it all!!!

Some other recommendations I won't go super deep into (because this is getting long) are under the cut.

LIVE ACTION TV: Beth/Rio from Good Girls, Luther/Alice (and just Alice in general) from Luther, Klaus/Camille from The Originals (though they do get less overtly-toxic as time goes on, also the last two seasons of this show are terrible), Cal/Zoe from Lie to Me. Rita/Laura from Doom Patrol is more...fraught and angsty than outright toxic (and it's also not canon ☹️) but there's still betrayal and murder attempts. Also love of my life (and half of my otp of all otps) Irene Adler from BBC Sherlock. Rebecca Bunch from Crazy Ex-Girlfriend isn't a villain (but she has Major Problems™) BUT I'M PUTTING HER HERE ANYWAY BECAUSE THIS IS MY FAVORITE SHOW OF ALL TIME PLEASE WATCH IT.

ANIME: Sunako Kirishiki from Shiki (VASTLY underrated show, with Themes™ of the dangers of fully dehumanizing your enemy/war is hell/what does it really mean to be "a monster," ALSO her looking 12 but being 700 years old is actually story-relevant and meant to decontruct the idea of eternal youth, which I think is neat), Shinji/Asuka from Neon Genesis Evangelion, Id: Invaded which has one of my favorite Murder Ladies Inami Nahoshi (killing related to trauma/being stuck in emotional stasis, her boyfriend/accomplice is completely under her thumb, but she goes ballistic when she gets separated from him), Akuma No Riddle (which I go back and forth on whether I think is actually good or not but there are SO many villainous gals there so I must stan), and Baccano (one character is in love with another because he so badly wants to kill her and she's just...into that).

OTHER MEDIA: Umineko When They Cry (visual novel--PLENTY of lady villains and also extremely deranged lesbians), Do Revenge (movie--convoluted friendship, pRoBLeMaTiC female protagonists), The Perfection (movie--one of my favorites!!! this relationship is fucked-up), Kasane (manga), Sunken Garden (opera--SOPRANO VILLAIN IS MY DREAM ROLE; sadly no recording/album exists, but I will keep everyone updated), my girl Margaret of Anjou (Shakespeare's Henry V (mainly parts 2 and 3) and Richard III--this woman is unhinged), Marisa Coulter (and her relationship with Asriel) from the His Dark Materials book series (there's also a TV show, but I haven't seen it), Black Death (movie--unsettling female villain), Kill Boksoon (this is basically Women's Wrongs: The Movie), Thrill Me (musical), and if you want Songs About Codependent Love then PLEASE check out English goth rock band Creeper's album Sex, Death & the Infinite Void and its follow-up American Noir.

THINGS THAT ARE ON MY TO WATCH/READ LIST BECAUSE THEY CONTAIN FEMALE VILLAINS AND/OR UNHEALTHY COUPLES: Phantom Thread (movie), The Traitor Baru Cormorant (book series), Interview with the Vampire (the TV show), Dracula 2020 (TV miniseries), Mortal Engines (book series), Stalker x Stalker (webcomic), The Monster of Elendhaven (book), The Wicked and the Willing (book), Magic Knight Rayearth (manga and anime--they apparently diverge at some point), Hold the Dark (movie), The Luminous Dead (book), From Dusk till Dawn: The Series, and the 2014 BBC TV series The Musketeers.

[arbiterlexultionis]

The whole shebang is absolutely wonderful I’ve got my one(1) brain cell firing on all cylinders, but for no I’m just gonna put my thoughts about Danny’s fighting ability and vigilante skills. A lot of the stuff I’ve seen so far has had Danny technically being the one who’s been a vigilante longer and having some skills but no where near Bruce’s level because of how long Bruce spent training. This does kinda make sense, and offers a whole bunch of opportunities around Danny learning from and training under Bruce for ✨Familial Bonding✨ but I personally am super fond of making Danny surprisingly competent for someone who was thrown into the life of a kid hero with no mentor.

Bruce has a fancy shmancy college edumancation that gives him a massive edge with a lot of the more technical and investigative areas of vigilantism, and that should show and at the same time give plenty of chances for Danny to sit criss cross applesauce on the floor with stars in his eyes while Bruce picks apart a case, thinking of how amazing it would have been to have that kind of skill when dealing with all the possession/impersonation/evil fruitloop schemes etc etc.

But Danny does have his specialties. Firstly, he grew up in the house of mad scientist. I’ve already made a post about Danny being One Smart Cookie, and while I don’t think I would apply it to this to as extreme as an extent as I did in that post Danny being really good with tech could be nice, and you could also make it funny. The only people Maddie and Jack ever really talked science with were each other, they probably needed a lot of weird purpose built equipment, parts and tools because of them building Ghost Stuff and Jack was kinda scatterbrained at times. All this came together to give the Fenton parents no reason to talk in a way that could be even somewhat coherent to normal people, and as such they did not. This, in combination with Danny just being born into mad science and thinking ray guns, dimensional portals, force fields and who knows what else are just normal science fair projects leads to Danny pretty much never learning any of the proper terms for anything or the official way of doing things, instead learning Fentonese. He is fully capable of tearing the Batmobile apart and putting it back together better than he found it, can make a death ray out of a toaster and building force field generators out of washing machines but has no knowledge about how normal people do science. The first time he sat down with Bruce to make gadgets he, after spending days on end convincing him that he Knows What He’s Doing and Is Technologically Talented, looked his new kinda dad-ish dead in the eye and went “the fucks a capacitor? That’s not a capackitom, that’s a [insert name of ultra obscure type of cheese that Bruce instantly recognizes because he a weird rich dude].” Danny gets kicked out of the workshop, sneaks back in and builds a jet pack. Which he then drops at Bruce’s feet before looking up at him with puppy dog eyes like a cat that just “gifted” their human a dead bird. This could also go into Danny learning to speak Batman, as he’s already fluent in one flavor of weirdo language. Bruce reciprocates and learns to speak Danny. To outsiders it looks completely unhinged and makes zero sense, but to them it’s perfectly understandable. This could also go with how the other bat kids learn “hrn” speak to lesser extent than Danny, they also learn Danny Speak to a lesser extent than Bruce. “How was your day?” Danny, face scrunching up: “Wisconsin” *hisses like a ghost cat*

Danny other specialty is combat, plain and simple. Some say that experience is the best teacher you can have and if there’s one thing chronically ill, sickly Danny has an utterly horrifying and heartbreaking amount of, its combat experience. Depending on how long he was doing the whole Phantom thing for before everything went to crap, he could have been fighting for his life for years. And if we’re going Immortal 14 Year Old, when it’s Win or Die the one and only option is to win, no matter how many times you have to get torn limb from limb to do so. While pretty much the entire league fights a lot of people, the overwhelming majority of their opponents are just normal people. On the other hand, the only “normal” people Danny ever fought were the GIW, who in the DC verse would probably be kinda dumb and held back by their own prejudice but actually trained and dangerous-ish or at the very least have frigen’ jetpacks, sci-fi weapons, tanks and jets like they did in the show, the Red Huntress, who is the goddamn Red Huntress, and his parents, a mom who is a master combatant that if translated into the DC verse could believably wind up as roughly equal to a member of the batfam super early in their career/while still a young kid and a father with ridiculous strength and arguably CQC skills that while not cape and cowl level could pose a serious threat in when combined with his strength and size kinda like an Off-brand Bane with laser guns who’s ranged fighting style of choice can be described as “Accuracy by Volume of fire”.

Other then them all his opponents were full on superhuman’s/giant animal monsters with at least 3 powers each, decades if not century’s to hone their skills, occasionally high tech weaponry and/or obscure abilities that range from “scary if you stop and think about it”(pretty sure the box ghost has shown the ability to control stuff that he finds in box’s. Everything Comes In Boxes. Including grenades. He also got his hands on Pandora’s Box and used it to wreak havoc.) all the way to “damn near unbeatable.”

Depending on how long he was acting as the protector of Amity, he could have very easily had literally everything and the kitchen sink thrown at him dozens of times over and came out on top again and again. I like the idea of him not having any prior training from his mom, being thrust into the life of a vigilante with nothing but talent, wits and the will to never give up no matter the odds. But by the time he meets Batman, covered in blood looking like death warmed over, he has had more skill and experience than any one deserves to have no choice but to gain forced upon him. Powers or no, he is a force of nature on the battlefield. Sneak attacks are blocked and dodged before he even realizes he’s moving because of all the times he wasn’t able to block or dodge Skulker phasing out of the ground beneath his feet to sink a blade into his ribcage. He can drag Robin to the ground and barely a second later bullets scream through where they had both been standing because of all the times he didn’t realize he was in his own mothers sights before he felt the white hot burn of plasma and spent the next hours sobbing in his closet as quietly as he could while trying to get the bleeding to stop. Lessons that no one should ever have to learn were carved, burned and beaten into his flesh far to many times for him to ever let even a single member of his new family learn them while he still lives(and he will always live, always always always. He has no choice.) All the experience he has with dealing with completely new abilities, both his own and his enemies, on the fly makes him a bizarrely good strategist despite his age and demeanor. He picks apart powers, fighting styles and technology without even realizing he’s doing it, pulling countermeasure and plans out of nowhere like it’s nothing. Once Bruce figures out he has this skill, he nurtures it and helps Danny figure out what and how he does it other than it just being a base instinct by the time they met.

I am loudly pushing the batdad agenda i am loudly pushing the— DPxDC Prompt

“Woah. You look like shit."

Granted, that’s probably not the first thing Danny should be saying to the guy that just bit the curb, but in his defense; he’s not running on 100% right now either.

The man -- tall, towering, and broader than Danny is tall -- whips around on his heel, black frayed cape flaring out impressively. Danny would've whistled in appreciation, but he takes the time instead to wipe the back of his hand across his mouth, smearing the blood running from his nose across his cheek.

"Sorry." He blinks widely, not even flinching as the man with the horns zeroes in on him. "That was rude of me. I have a really bad brain-to-mouth filter; Sam says its what always gets me into trouble."

And she's not wrong either, per say. His smart mouth is what landed him in this situation -- with blood blossom extract running through his veins and cannibalizing the ectoplasm in his bloodstream. Thanks Vlad.

The man grunts at him; a short, curt "hm" that shouldn't make Danny smile, but he does because he's somewhat delirious and probably concussed. The man keeps some kind of distance, sinking towards the shadows of Gotham's alleyway like he dares to melt right into it.

If it's supposed to scare Danny, it doesn't work. Danny's never been afraid of the dark; he's always been able to hide himself in it. He blinks slowly at the mass of shadows.

"You look hurt." The shadows says, blurring together around the edges. Danny squints, and licks his lips to get the blood dripping down his chin off. Ugh, he hates the taste of blood.

"I am." He says, "My godfather poisoned me. M'dying." The agony of the blood blossom eating him from the inside out looped back around to numbing a while ago, so all he feels is half-awake and dazed.

"Hey," Danny stumbles forward towards the man, a bloodied hand reaching out to him. "You-- you're a hero, right? You're not attacking me; which is more than I can say for most costumed people I've met." Maybe it's a poor bar to judge someone at, but he's already established that Danny's not in his right mind.

The man makes no change in expression, but Danny realizes blearily that it's hard to tell with the shadows on his face. He stays still long enough for Danny to latch onto the cape -- stretchy, but almost soft under his fingers.

He looks up blearily into the whites of the man's eyes. "Can you help me? I don't-- I don't wanna die." Again. He doesn't wanna die again. He blinks slow and lizard-like. "I mean- I'll probably get to see mom and dad again, but I told them I'd at least try and make it to adulthood."

There's a clatter down the street, and Danny's ghost sense chills up his spine and leaves a bitter, ashy taste in his mouth. He immediately knows who it belongs to even before the deceptively gentle; "Daniel?" echoes down the way.

"Daniel? Quit your games, badger, Gotham is dangerous for children."

Danny's mouth pulls back, and blood spills against his tongue. "Please." He rasps, and grabs onto the shadow's cape with both hands. "Please. He's going to kill me. Please--"

"Daniel? Is that you?"

His lips part, dragging in air to plead with the darkness again. He doesn't need to, the whites of his eyes narrow, and the cape whirls around him before Danny can blink. Soon swaddled in shadows, the Night lifts him up, and steals him away.

[hair-clip-trash]

I've been on pro ana Tumblr on and off for an embarrassingly long time now (7 years) which means I've gotten to witness what I call "the tiktokification of ed spaces". 4 years ago in terms of text posts the talk about exercise to the talk about restriction ratio was heavily skewed towards restriction... but now it's almost 50/50? Before (also 4 years ago b/c that was my most active time) you maybe got a post about books every once in a while but now it's e v e r y w h e r e. The ana to mia ratio has skewed far more towards ana than before. The average thinspo is less based around an aesthetic and more basic. Ppl are a lot more unhinged while putting on a waaaayyyy better mask of being perfectly normal. I also feel like the shblr and edblr overlap keeps shrinking by the year (on the edblr side at least, shblr talks about both all the time [maybe b/c it's normalized on tiktok to have food issues, but cutting is still very much taboo]). I don't have any data to back this up, these are just my observations as someone with a near photographic memory who's been in ed and sh spaces for longer than TikTok has been popular and noticed some changes.

[heinoushymns]

This fucking person is actually unhinged. Did some snooping and found that they participate in a lot of upsetting shit.

Such as:

•Attacking Actual Children Online

- A lot of this person's posts are just being hateful towards kids. Mainly kids who are into "shifting" and enjoy talking about their interests. They've expressed that they don't like "shifting" and it annoys them. But their replies are really irrationally angry? Yelling at kids to stop pretending, stop faking, and that everyone is lying to them? That's fucking weird. Stop attacking children since you claim to be so high on your holy horse about protecting them.

•Calling People Delusional

- The word "delusional" comes up frequently as an insult, as well as "mentally ill (in a different way)".

This is ableist, especially coming from someone who claims to have a psychology degree.

They also hate on paraphilias and encourage the demonization of them instead of the rehabilitation and understanding of them. (Part of that process is meeting other people with paraphilias and realizing that you're not alone and that there is hope and coping mechanisms for you.)

• Wishing Infertility On Someone

- They claim it was their "friend" who said "I hope your tentacle dildo makes you infertile". But you can clearly see it says their username. Also, if their friend said that, why would you still be friends with them, holy roller?

•Making Weird Comments About Trans People

- This one may be nitpicky, but they have a lot of trans-centered posts on their blog for someone who doesn't know a lot about transgender people. They've also been seen being transphobic by attacking someone's "em" pronouns.

•Overall Just Being A Sad Sack of Wrath

- Their posts are.. concerning. They obviously have a lot of mental anguish and built up anger to be acting out like this online. They talk about keeping coping mechanisms to oneself, however it really does seem like they're coping by attacking people they believe are "pedophiles" due to their own trauma. It's terrible that they've gone through such traumas, however it does not give them the right to lash out at people, especially children. They're being harmful to others because they don't feel good about themself. That's an awful way to "own" your life.

Fiction can affect reality, but not always on a 1:1 basis. People can separate fiction from reality and lead perfectly normal lives after consuming heinous fiction. No, children/people who could get triggered shouldn't be exposed to it, that's why there's a tagging system both here on Tumblr and on places like AO3.

Proship doesn't stand for "problematic ship". It stands for "Pro/For Shipping". And this can mean that you don't necessarily consume problematic fiction, but you still don't harass others for their tastes.

Problematic fiction is a great coping mechanism for those who can handle it and consume it in a healthy way that actively gives them control over the situation. Just like with BDSM, safe, sane, and consensual are the gold guidelines.

Only adults should be consuming pornographic dark fiction. Adults in the proship scene do not interact with children and encourage them to stay away from their accounts/media.

Children should be allowed to express themselves in dark fiction, but should not be exposed to pornography. Children who consume this type of material should be watched carefully by their parents and be given therapy to help sort out what coping mechanism works for them.

It's nobody's business what someone else does in the bedroom unless it is actively harming someone/something else. And no, fiction does not harm anyone and does not lead indefinitely to a real life action.

I know they won't be interested in "reading all that", but this isn't really for them, but rather to drag them for being unpleasant.

antis: media depicting illegal and/or reprehensible things shouldn’t be created, consumed, or readily available to the public. people who interact positively with these kinds of media either already want to/already do these things in reality, or the media itself will make them want to.

also antis (but it’s not the same, don’t get it twisted, this is the good kind of illegal and reprehensible):

[h-worksrambles]

  I’m delighted to hear that people seemed to like my comparison of Max’s voices. And when I floated the idea of doing a similar comparison for Sam’s voices, people seemed keen. Now, Sam has had less voices than Max over the years, three currently, but fortunately, I have a lot to say about all of them. Sam is probably my favourite character in the series, and his voices over the years have given him a lot of charming little nuances. I will do my best to keep this to a voice comparison and not a shameless Sam appreciation post, but we’ll see...   I want to start by summing up one of the key things that I think makes Sam tick, and what I believe makes a good Sam voice. And that is that Sam is NOT the straight man of the duo...but he LOOKS like he is. Everything about Sam’s design makes him look relatively normal compared to Max. He’s a big dog which people associate with affection and friendliness. Sam wears clothing like every other character while Max is canonically nude, specifically a full suit which also doubles to make him look like a consumate professional. He’s also slightly more humanoid in appearance, compared to Max’s stumpy shaped body and massive head. All of this makes you think, ‘oh, this guy’s a sensible, professional detective compared to the insane rabbit next to him’.    Then he opens his mouth and tells you cheerfully about how Max made a clown choke on his own wig during their last case and it was the funniest, most adorable thing he’d ever seen. And THAT’s when you know this guy is a total enabler every bit as unhinged as his partner. A good Sam voice is able to make Sam sound perfectly normal at first glance, but all it takes is a minute’s conversation to learn that he’s ABSOLUTELY not.

  Anyway, let’s start as we did last time at Hit the Road. I don’t think it’s a bold statement to say that Bill Farmer is a terrific voice actor, but he does a splendid job here. Sam & Max has always had an element of noir parody, and a tongue in cheek take on detective fiction. The second Sam opens his mouth, you can instantly spot the Humphrey Bogart-esque voice he’s going for. Sam is supposed to put you in mind of a stoic, by-the-book noir detective. He sounds like he could have walked right of a black-and-white movie from the 50s. More than that, he sounds like a professional. Then you listen to what he’s actually saying and you realise...

Oh my god, this guy is a jerk!      Farmer’s Sam is absolutely Sam at his snarkiest. Most of his dialogue slips in some subtle dig at whoever he’s talking to. He and Max’s banter is quite dry and cutting, but still feels very natural (especually in the classic ‘lousy golfer’ exchange, which I think pretty much everyone in the fandom has memorised after that one fan animation). Just listen to how many roasts he dishes out in this game.   “Excuse us, but we need some help and although you seem dangerously unequipped brain wise, we’ve come to you for advice.”

  It means that he can shrug off everything, no matter how bizarre, as perfectly normal, which sells you further on that deceptive lunacy.   Sam also keeps up that air of faux-professionalism even when he’s being as un-professional as possible. Whether’s he shrugging off the flirtatious advances of a bungee-jumping instructor or getting into silly fights with a kid in the line, Sam never stops acting like he’s the star of his own personal movie. He’s got a severe case of ‘protagonist entitlement’, which makes his propensity to steal everything that’s not nailed down kind of fitting. I love the accent, I love the performance and I love his snark. I really wish we’d gotten that 2004 game so we could hear him for a little longer.

“This is so degrading.” “Shut up and dance.”

  Then we have the late, great Harvey Atkin from the cartoon, probably the most different and unique take on Sam, but still a very good one. Everything in the animated series is more cartoonish and over-the-top. So Sam’s pretence of professionalism becomes more of a jolly sense of bluster. He’s still very much a man (er, dog) on the case, but he’s much less dry and much more upbeat. That’s a lot like what I noticed with Rob Tinker’s Max, and it does help to give them a mutual high energy as they bounce off each other. While I personally like Sam to be a little quieter, and to hide that mad streak a little more, I still really enjoy this approach. It’s certainly the kind of voice you’d expect from a giant talking dog and fits very well with the fast-paced nature of the cartoon.

What Atkin absolutely nails, more than any other voice, is Sam’s temper. Being much louder and cartoonish in general means he can go hard on the moments where Sam gets mad. And that’s great because Sam has always been the more short tempered of the two. Max may be very violent but he’s not exactly one to get angry. Like I said last time, he’s more guarded with his emotions and more easy going. Sam is a lot more insecure and has much more things that set him off. Imply he’s bad as his job? Make fun of him for being a dog? Make a crack about his weight? Hurt Max in any way? All of those things can leave you with a very angry, 6ft tall dog with VERY large teeth.

‘Pinkbellies. I hated those. To this DAY I hate those. CURSE YOU MELON HARGAVES!!!”     Atkin sells ‘angry Sam’ very well, especially when it contrasts with how jovial he is the rest of the time. Atkin’s Sam is certainly a sharp contrast coming directly off of Farmer, but it’s an excellent performance in it’s own right.

  Last of all we have David Nowlin, by far the longest-running Sam voice, between all three Telltale games, Poker Night 2 and This Time It’s Virtual. And this is probably my favourite voice for Sam. Now if you listen to his first few performances, you can really hear a resemblance between Bill Farler’s performance and David Nowlin’s. And that’s partly because, if you read the interviews on the Sam & Max website, you’ll see Nowlin was actually a huge fan of Farmer’s performance and consciously tried to emulate it.   But overtime, his performance morphs into something distinct. In TTIV especially, his performance becomes a little less stoic and a little more upbeat. Ther’s a charming quiet affability to his voice somewhere between Farmer’s casual snark and Arkin’s cheerful enthusiasm.  And I really like that for Sam. It’s like he’s able to treat the most bizarre scenarios like they’re a typical Tuesday event. Being in this line of work alongside Max of all people for so long means nothing can phase him. His quiet delivery also re-captures a quirk of Farmer’s Sam. It’s one thing to sarcastically insult someone, it’s another to do so in a perfectly nice and civil tone. He can be biting or downright sinister in the most pleasant voice possible. A classic case of ‘beware the quiet ones’. “Max, do you have a piece of paper handy?” “You want to write down the phone number?” “(perfectly level tone) I remember the number. I want to write myself a reminder to smother you with a pilow in your sleep.”   The other key difference is that his Sam is a lot less confident and a lot more vulnerable. His tone is quieter, he’s a lot more easily flustered, and, much like Atkin’s version, it’s much easier to make him mad. And that’s honestly really interesting because, when you think about it, Sam is very insecure. No-one’s asking him to dress up in a suit or carry himself like a detective. That’s something he does himself because he so desperately wants to be cool. The best example of that is the Noir Sam segment. Sam narrates to himself on long, impassioned tangents out of his despair for Max, only for others to call him out for doing so, and he has to sheepishly apologise before gettng back to the point. “You. Me. The guy who delivers your deep dish pizzas...all of us bubbling over with sin and corruption and-” “Is there a point to any of this? Or are you just trying to get me depressed?” “(pleasant rational tone) Sorry, just thinking out loud. (furious again) WHERE WERE WE?!”

  And speaking of, 303 is probably Nowlin’s best performance. I think Atkin still has the best ‘angry voice’, but I love the growl of Nowlin’s delivery here. It’s a very dog-like angry performance if that makes sense, that walks a line between being aggressive but still funny, and his instant swaps from grief-stricken rage to calm conversation are hillarious.   The best way I can say it is that, much like how Rob Tinkler is my favorite Max because he was able to capture the essentials of the character while still adding his own dimension, Nowlin does the same for Sam. He hits all the beats of what I’d want from a good Sam: the business-like detective caricature, a quiet, pleasant, demanor that masks an unhinged enabler who can say the most nonsense stuff with a straight face. A barely concealed temper that boils up when you say the wrong thing to him. All whle giving the character a layer of subtle insecurity that works well both for comedy and sincere character development. Sam is a self conscious dork playing at being a cool, capable detective. Always putting up an act, and not doing a very good job maintaining it. And I think that especially helps in Season Three. It’s very easy to feel sorry for this more vulnerable Sam when he’s going through hell, but it never gets so overdone that he stops being funny.

  Ok, if this goes on much longer, it IS just going to be spiel on why I relate way too hard to a talking dog. So I’ll just say this. All three of these voice actors do a splendid job and they all have their strengths. I love Farmer’s effortless noir parody and merciless snark. I love Harvey Atkin’s jovial energy masking a fierce temper, and I love Nowlin’s quiet brand of madness and extra layer of humanity. They’re all funny and likable while still being complete jackasses in their own ways.   So many years, and not one dud performance along either of these leads. If you ask me, that’s pretty impressove. A lot of talented people put a lot of effort into bringing this duo to life, and I think it more than paid off.

[wroteclassicaly]

May I Taste Your Sin

(Michael Langdon x Female Reader)

Pairings : Michael Langdon x Female Reader

Warnings : Language, smut, blood, vaginal sex, vaginal fingering, oral sex, blood play, & period sex.

A/N : This fic has been a loooong time coming! I’m sorry it’s taken me this long, but now that I have inspo I wanted get this out for y’all! The warnings are obviously self-explanatory, so skip this if you don’t like the contents it’s gonna contain! Michael Langdon eats human hearts, and he’s a demon, before anyone starts to fuss over this, lol. I’m sure menstrual cycles with his partner would be a dessert to him!

Enjoy! This one is pretty intense, so I’m nervous about it! I also have more installments with different characters coming in the next few days! :)

Check out where I first posted the teaser for this fic, and check out these period sex headcanons I wrote for Michael!

~*~

He keeps staring at you. You try to move about, do your tasks, even attempt conversation with people you’d tried so hard to avoid these past several years. Your abilities to function like the human being that you are, seemingly vanish whenever the tall honey blond is within your exhausted proximities. You aren’t sure if you’d like to let out the loudest echoing scream and see where it ends up in this place, or let your wildest carnal urges guide your hormones into a literal sticky situation. Or, at the very least, let yourself fantasize about seducing him in your own self-created version of reality.

You’ll have to settle on the latter, unfortunately. Pocketing the cream colored dish rag, you place the last row of finely printed novels on the book shelve. Your fingertips linger, attempting to find a portal through their leather cover tops. Your tongue slicks your parched lips, neck stretching to crack out the tension. You aren’t trying to do anything but stealing some relaxation, when a largely hot hand is pressing a knot-out in a knead on your shoulder - clasping, settling a risky purchase.

You don’t have to make an educated guess to know whose hand that belongs to. He practically spews out his control and ownership of this place every chance that he gets. Biting down a venomous sigh, you coerce yourself into a turn around - gathering an eyeful of Langdon’s fancy black vest. That’s not good enough for the King, apparently, as he fits his pointer finger underneath your chin in a tuck, thumb pressing against your jaw to tilt your gaze to his own.

“Did you forget your manners, Miss Y/L/N?”

The way his shining eyes are sizing your attention, captivating your unwillingness to comply to how Langdon makes you feel - it can’t be humanly possible, can it? There’s that possessive ache that begs you to launch ownership over him and his entire body. Why is everything so widely dramatic whenever he’s around? Is he just full of himself or is it something way more than you’re aware? A crackling parch winds its pathway around your throat, sealing your breath in.

Nothing comes from between your lips. You’re frozen solid, legs a weightless press. Each touch this... man brings upon your body is like a bass thump - pumping you towards his secretive rhythm. All you can do is sway with the beat. Langdon smirks coyly, his other hand resting behind his back in an idle grace.

Neither of you dare utter a word. However, Langdon is seemingly content in making you squirm and you try to focus on everything but his perfectly crafted jawline, and how eagerly you’d suck on it if asked. You swear you can hear your heartbeat galloping off, so strong that it can tear your heart right out of your chest along with it. His colorful eyes glance over you in a brief stamping sweep, lingering at your sore breasts and your waistline.

What is he even doing...?

“Excuse me, but Ms. Venable did not authorize any private conferences with the help.” A cold and steel - grasped voice chills your bones down, dusting your cheeks with a reddening humiliation.

You haven’t even so much as spoken to Langdon, yet it feels like you two have been clawing and scratching at each other all over this fucking outpost, riding one another until you can’t fathom walking upright. You still can’t speak, but Langdon takes care of that for you.

“Interesting, and did Ms. Venable give you permission to waltz in here when you weren’t requested or required, just to give a meaningless order?” Langdon is mildly amused in his question, his hand still paused on your chin, thumb now swiping in a tickling drop with his fingertip - along your jaw.

Ms. Mead looks comical in her brief attempt at forming a snappy comeback, only to go silent in defeat. You take this tension as your escape line - quickly edging from the sacred confines Langdon has built for you two, and you all but run out the door. You’re clutching your shirt collar, punching a two pounce path up the staircase and to the help’s quarters.

Chores now, panic later.

~*~

Five minutes. Five fucking minutes in this place that you’ve served without question, complaint, for nearly two years - is all you want. But as the heavy handed rasps of Mead’s knuckle bones beat on your bathroom door, you know that is a simple pipe dream. Her low voice is harsh with you, making your headache unfold into a full blown migraine. You shift uncomfortably, knees knocking together, thighs sore against the cool porcelain seat below you.

Langdon must’ve massively pissed her off... Good.

Your palms collect purchase to your cradle your face, your eyes glistening with tears, throat burning with frustration. It hurts too much to stand upright this time. Normally women would lose this in stressful situations. Add the apocalypse and barely eating, you’d peg it normal to receive nothing. However, your predicament is much worse, fucking you over once more.

Your body welcomes Mother Nature each month. Unpredictable, yet there. Heavy, excruciating. You could list on and on reasons that don’t amount to much. You’re stuck with a part of you that won’t ever come to fruition.

Not in your former life, especially not in this one. Another reminder that carries an award winning irony. Sighing, you peer down at the red dish rag you were given. Literally on the rag, what a joyous harmony. The elites of course, are given the tampons and pads.

You have to use scraps of fabric you’re forced to wash in the bathtub if you move too fast or sneeze. And on your heavy days when you haven’t the time to stop your duties to wash and air out the towels, things are much harder. At least before the apocalypse you had chocolate, feminine products, a warm shower to take your time in, movies to curl up with, and a place of your own to cry where no one could hear you. You sniffle, hormones locking down your heart.

Most recently the outpost had welcomed the cooperative leader Langdon. He had interviewed everyone but you, uninterested, only flustering you a few times. Him being here just makes your period a more unwelcome storm. This morning as you were passing him on the landing of the staircase, delivering the bath towels to elite rooms, he stared at you. Right into you, nostrils flaring, tongue rolling out to slick his plump lips, blue eyes darkening.

Then there was this afternoon. How could I forget...?

The encounters were over quicker than they took place. Still, his acknowledgment of you didn’t bring your interview, nor did it promise your application for the sanctuary he preaches about. Forcing your tears to bank, you stand with your dress skirt and apron held up, staring at the stained rag in your panties. You turn and flush the toilet, eating back around to the shock of your fucking life. There, just feet in the from the doorway, is Langdon in all his glory.

It makes you swallow harshly, stomach drawing off the butterflies that have grown claws. You feel winded. His ring covered fingers bring an object to your sights. A thinly wrapped stick. You don’t answer, you don’t move, you don’t protest him approaching until he’s directly in front of you.

“What do you think you’re doing?” You try, a mere whisper betraying your bravery.

“Helping you,” He answers simply, a heated slide crossing his mouth. You can practically taste him, damn near swaying forward.

You start to snap back into your senses, ready to cover your remembered modesty back up. He grasps your wrist, a hungry look soft in his features. “Will you let me?”

You’re shaking, body on fire at him touching you, you try to keep your legs from clenching, that want. You know what will occur if you let yourself. He is gentle with you, admiration clear. Why? You don’t understand this.

“You’re bleeding, I know.”

Jaw unhinged, you stand upright, his fingers still ghosting your skin. An unlucky movement on your part, the warmth spills from you and you look down between your thighs in horror at the red lines running down your legs, pattering against the floor. Langdon is breathing heavily, practically panting, stunning you once more. His other hand grips your cheek, thumb swiping your lip, eyes not breaking contact from yours.

“Do you know how good your cunt smells? Every pathetic person in this outpost is starving and you have the best meal between your fucking legs.”

When your silence stretches on, Michael nudges forward, careful with you. “May I feast?”

It’s all too much to handle. Having him talk to you, you speaking to him. And now this? How? You begin to grow dizzy, hands trembling as you try to pull your clothing back up. Langdon’s hands grip your wrists.

“Please don’t do that.”

You want to stun him incredulously, backhand him. None of that is happening, not even the urge. Instead, your want for him is magnifying beyond any feigned ignorance. Your tongue slides out across your lips, teeth biting down on your bottom lip in a brisk chew. Langdon hooks his middle finger between your teeth, releasing your lip and combing the blood across in a coppery gloss.

Your chest is startled, rising and falling in quivering quakes, ears hearing a static rush. Everything inside of you is alive and crying out in need to be sated. Langdon grips you around the waist, lowering his forehead to rest atop your own, his middle finger - still doused in your blood - slithers past his own lips, which close in a sticky suckle. A vibrating moan pummels his throat, causing a constricting swallow that showcases his Adam’s apple.

If I could only just lick that...

Langdon is sly and devilishly cunning to a fault - fast in his next movements. He presses a designer boot down over your skirts, successfully preventing them from being made up. “Leave them here for someone else.”

“I... I can’t. This is too much, Langdon —“ He chuckles at the formality.

“Since I can see your womanhood running from between your legs, I suppose it’s only fair that we skip some formalities, don’t you agree, Y/N?” Your eyes are probably wider than necessary - a cartoon like sight. He’s used your full name in an authoritative command, leaving no room for question. “And you may call me Michael.”

It’s all a little more frantic from this point. He gives the slightest of information, and you see your skirts and panties gliding across the floor in a winded push. Michael brings that wrapped item back into your eye-line. “We won’t be needing this for a while.”

“I didn’t say yes.” You try, swallowing a weak, whimpering stifle.

“But you didn’t say no, did you?” That shit eating grin. He has you and he is all too aware - elated to the brimming brimstone of hellfire you’re about to bestow upon yourself.

Your insides melt into the trenches of red hot, raw ravishment. Michael drops his left arm down, hand palming his hardening cock through black slacks, eyes encouraging you in a chained bind. “Let’s go and make a mess in my room.”

Now or never. No more of this, back to reality, maybe some place better. You’re spinning in a foiling encasement, precipice wide and open - hungry to pull you under. And you dive in, you let it all go. Michael looks satisfied, sharing something with himself that you don’t know... yet.

Taking Michael Langdon’s hand, you’re led into the unknown.

~*~

Langdon leads you down his own separate corridor, your free hand scolded for trying to hold yourself over your uniform.

“I want you to make a mess.” Michael says.

You hope that you’re not the one who will be paying the cost for your own said mess, or cleaning it up. If it’s up to Venable - you’ll be licking it, all the way to her high heeled boots.

Once inside the confines of Michael Langdon’s bedroom, you take the time to look around, enjoying the perks this situation is bringing. The room isn’t any different than what the purple elites get here, it is bordering on a more... lived in feel, which is ironic when you consider that Langdon hasn’t been here like everyone else has for the past three years.

Guess he’s just more comfortable? He does look like an English vampire half the time..

On that note, a particularly harsh cramp antagonizes your uterus, causing you to clench your abdomen, choking out a acidic slice. “Fucking demonic cramps.”

Michael - now clad in his all black ensemble, minus the overcoat - chortles, knotting his fingers together behind his back and strolls forward, wetting his lips as the firelight crackles a sparking soundtrack. “It’s ironic how you refer to it as “demonic”, when Satan really has nothing to do with this. I mean, it’s not on him that humanity failed their pitiful guidelines for sobering temptation. Wasn’t it your lord and savior that bestowed this curse upon you?” He finishes, giving a head tilt to your unhinged stun.

“Are you religious?” Is all you can come up with.

Michael sneers, looking slightly offended. It fades seconds later. “Depends on your definition of religious, and then there is what one believes in. But I guess you can say that I’m devoted to... a certain cause.”

“Were you this mysterious before the apocalypse, or is that why the cooperative gave you the job?” You try, a discomfort crackling at your inner thighs.

They’re probably smeared... And not just with blood.

“I bet you’re uncomfortable.” Michael teases, snapping his fingers at the fireplace. Did your eyes betray you, or did the flames flicker?

You want to give a snappy comeback, but it feels unwise. You nod like the sap that you are, nails biting your palms. Your heartbeat has begun to accelerate, a visible sight beneath your apron. Langdon guides himself to step in front of you, leather shoes drumming across the floor beneath. Every sound in this forsaken room is flowing through your eardrums - Michael’s scent on the tip of your tongue.

You need him. More than your body has to have the air that filters underneath this mausoleum. You’re so unsteady, eyes brimming with the smoking arousal, blocking common sense. Michael catches you as you collide with his chest, wrapping your fists into his vest. His blue irises are disappearing to a canyon of night sky - lavish black so sinful that it steals the breath from your lungs.

Drizzling off your tongue is a hesitation. “Won’t we get into trouble...? Venable -“ Those rough fingertips hold a softness that hushes your lips, denting.

“Can watch me with my face buried into your cunt. The humiliation will arouse her.” Michael answers in his own finish.

You aren’t sure why, but that grates your mouth into a sneaky grin, shared with Michael’s, sensing that slapping throb at his phrases. He pinches your chin, nuzzling your head to the side, his lips sloping a map across your neck. His towering physique backs you by knocking his knees into your thighs, delivering you to the edge of his bed. You drop like wild weights, looking towards the ceiling, trying to take a deep inhalation. Langdon crouches, pants rustling as they tighten around his temptingly thick thighs.

He tuts in a scold, chiding you furthermore. “You will watch what I’m getting ready to do to you! Is that clear, Y/N?”

You don’t answer fast enough, Michael’s hand wrapping around your throat, eyes burning hellfire through you - dusting your bones to ash. Your throat is wet with the clingy, unshed tears. Fuck, you have to be filled up until you’re hollowed out. Michael is languid in grace, hand toppling into your lap, joining his other.

“Take down your hair, Y/N.”

Like a puppet, you obey your new owner. Unwrapping the pointed bun, you shake your locks free, sighing in an eased tickle.

“What a good and obedient girl that you are. Those who obey, shall reap the riches.”

“Why are you doing this?” An ignorant question on your part.

“Because,” As if it’s the most simple answer in this broken world, Michael let’s his hands start to unbutton his vest, carelessly sending it, his attention not wavering off you in the slightest. “I’m hungry.”

A literal moan comes from you, making Langdon hiss through his through his milky white teeth. He resumes his former position, hovering.

“Spread.” Michael says, a quaint wonder adorning him, his palms sliding up and down your legs to feel you part them. The blood is mixing some fucked out potion with your creamy arousal for him, and he knows it, has it right into your tremble from the exposure.

Your skin is steaming in scrapes, responding so vulgarly to Michael, that he is hooking his wrists under your knees, bouncing the flesh into his awaiting hands, and claiming. He hoists your legs over his shoulders to arch you to his idea of perfection. You should be protesting, in a shambled shyness. That is gone, no place here. Michael let’s his nose rest in the crease of your thigh, crudely sniffing like some beast.

His sopping tongue finds a striking stroke along your ruby red, damp thigh.

Closer... He’s getting closer...

When you can’t feel that warm and snide air he possesses, you lock to load a question. Michael is shedding himself of his remaining clothing in a cocky crawl. His hair curtains his face as he sees you seek out his cock - thick and heavy, weighted and wet with pre-cum.

“Finish taking off your clothing.” You’ve never done something so fast in your years alive.

You have to admit, being so vulnerable like this - naked and bleeding, it has you buzzing.

Michael outstretches a veined forearm, the back of his rings swirling in desiring dances across your breasts. “Do these hurt?”

Your lashes are slicked in perspiring tears, the tired soreness harassing your chest. He has his truth. His trim form bows to you once more, placing your legs back where they belong. He knuckles a pressing push into your abdomen. “Bear down.”

It isn’t an accident this time, it’s not a discreet secrecy. Michael wants you this way. All of you. Finding a confidence, you give yourself a high and sink your fingers into his hair, toes tickling his shoulder blades in a forwarding nudge, doubling down on your muscles. That warmth spills out of you and Langdon takes you, tongue parting your swollen folds. He regulates his tongue in wet paints, licking and sucking everything you give him.

“Please—“ You’re already begging. It’s so fucking intense and intimate that you can’t formulate your own damned name.

“Are you really going to ask, or would you just like to feel good?” Michael vibrates, his mouth visible and shining crimson as he seeks you out between your slippery thighs.

It’s outright feral. His irises are coal black, blue lost in some combing canyon that’s crumbled around sin. His digits prod at your sensitive opening, being accepted moments later. His lips close over your clit, tongue slithering back and forth to assist his beckoning fingers. He gathers more from you - his purpose.

That quenched fold starts to seize you early on, your pattering breaths signaling the orgasm that is about to tear the screams from your fucking diaphragm. Michael’s hand smacks and rolls your swollen breast - permission granted. That’s all it takes and you’re falling back onto the mattress, back arching in a lined drag, pussy flattening against his mouth. He jerks you impossibly closer, your vision whiting out into dark spots. You tangle your fingers further into his luscious strands, holding, pulling.

In the midst of close recovery, Michael is plowing you with a short lived let down, his mouth leaving your pussy. You can’t complain, no time available, as his hips slot in a frazzled fit between your legs. His pelvis is tense, sheathed in sweat. His chest smashes your breasts, his hand reaching down to guide his cock inside you. You can’t speak, but cling tightly to his back. He growls a sound that you’ll never forget, the fire bursting behind him, flames licking the rocked cove that houses them.

His mouth is covered in your essence, your cunt bathing his dick with each violent thrust. It’s pouring in drenches, salty perspiration, pooling blood - both of you losing yourselves in the mess. Michael props himself up, digging into a dipping slam, meeting your mouth in an ending kiss. His hair tickles your shoulders, nose nudges your now blood caked mouth, and he gives the warning.

“Spill your fucking curse all over me!” And you come undone, glued to him in puzzled entrapment.

Your thighs are wrecked, his bedsheets useless, and then there’s Michael, who forces you to look at him and really see him. There’s only black in his eyes. You sputter a disbelief, bracing. His mouth parts, tongue flicks across to gather more, leveling off into his jagged movements. He swells inside your cunt, dousing your walls in his warm cum.

He doesn’t leave you, not even when it’s over. He simply takes you with him. You aren’t sure where you get the courage to speak - body shaking and shivering.

“What... Michael, who are you?”

He cups a hand over your cunt, rolling onto his side, keeping you held to him. He lightly blows away a pesky lock of your hair, then maneuvers another behind your ear.

“I’m the man who’s going to save your wretched existence.”

Tag list : @littledemondani @dark-mei-rose @fckinsupreme @angelicmichael @icylangdon @ritualmichael @sojournmichael @celestialrequiem @instinctsxbaby @infernwetrust @ferndolan @9layerdevilfoodcake @bloodcoatedeclipse @wormycircumstance @antichristsxbox @xavierplympton @xavierplymptons @ramona-thorns @lovelylangdonx @langdxn @codyarchives @dailylangdon @codyfernuk @langdonsjoyy @7-wonders @blakescoven @holylangdon @bitchchatter @suspiriva @taskmastter @kitty4860 @ladynuwanda @langdonsexual @sammythankyou

[al-hekima-madara-blog]

Speculations from the cavern Part III

Part I

Part II

Let's dig into the most unhinged Uchiha's tradition : eyes exchange !

Based on both pictures above, it looks like it's the same set of eyes and that Madara just removed the blind one. But no it's much more chaotic than that!

That's not his original eyes to start with. He inherited Izuna's eyes in the same way Itachi offers his to Sasuke to awake the Eternal Mangakyou Sharingan. Slight digression but am I the only one wondering what Madara and Sasuke did with their "old" pair of eyes? Did they just dump them in a bin, can they re-use them later or give to someone else? Or do they just rot when detached from their original sockets? (Gosh... I feel this post is getting too graphic 😭)

From part II, we know now that Madara was actually free to move across the globe most of his life. Everyone thought he was dead at the Valley of the End and after roughly a decade most of people who personally knew him were deceased. However, he was handicapped with only one sharingan left. His right eyes had been sacrificed to resurrect himself with Izanagi.

Since he was waiting for the Rinnegan, I don't think he replaced his blind one but who knows? he said also, I misquote, that Sharingan are like light bulb always good to have more on the side.

Talking about spare eyes. There is at least two people (aside Obito) that Madara met during this long exile. Nagato and an Uchiha who gave him his single sharingan.

For the unknown Uchiha there is many possibilities :

1/ Did Madara have the habits like Danzo to collect Sharingans after a battle? And there was so many wars during his lifetime, it's like doing mushroom picking in the forest.

2/ He kept secret contact with some Uchihas inside Konoha, still loyal to him. But I'm not convinced. He seems to have been totally cut off from Konoha when he left.

3/ He has known (sympathized?) with an other Uchiha in his old days before he awakened his Rinnegan. That could be a nice fanfic idea if anyone interested. That person was probably not strong or relevant enough to be useful as a pawn, but close enough to have giving him his/her unique eye left for some reason.

About Nagato. All I can speculate is that like Obito both were rushed choices. Not rush in a way it was a mistake, but rushed that as soon as Madara has awakened his Rinnegan he literally had a countdown above his head before dying. His first move was to look for a senju descendant. How strange to choose a distant Uzumaki cousin rather that a direct Senju like Princess Tsunade? In theory she is an ideal candidate to be able to bear the Rinnegan, she is both descendant of Hashirama Senju and Mito Uzumaki. Was she not easily accessible to him? (I think she was already a grown adult and trained medecine shinobi by this time) Did he already reckon she was too weak for the job? Maybe witnessing her story and her struggle with haemophobia, alcoholism and depression ect.. He judged her long time ago as a "weak woman" for carrying his plan. But for sure, he knew perfectly the Senju/Uzumaki lineage, he didn't discovered her during the 4th shinobi war. The fact he never mentioned her name shows how disappointed he was by her abilities as Hashirama's heiress.

Finally he chose Nagato, an immigrant in the Ame country if I remember well. Just like Karin, or Kushina, he was one of the few survivor from Uzumaki clan scattered in different countries. It's hard to tell how Madara could have switch his eyes without his parents noticing it. It seems you can't deactivate a Rinnegan like a Sharingan. Hagoromo, Madara, Nagato and even Sasuke never switch them off once it's awakened. Like how the hell can you look at your child one day with normal pupils and the next day looking crazy like this :

Anyway that's it for now.

Next Part IV

[adirectorprepares]

Okay. There are many reasons why my main man Eugenides deserves to sweep this, a lot of which have been talked in propaganda posts on this and previous polls. But no one is talking about my number one reason why he is the Most unreliable narrator of all time, and that is that I think he pulls the longest long con I have ever encountered. (Spoilers ahead, though I’m trying to be vague)

The first time you read The Thief (the first Queen’s Thief novel, and the only one really narrated by Eugenides), you get to the end and go “Oh, that little shit was lying to me the whole time!!!” Then you read it again and you realise “Oh, he really never lied! He was just narrating to someone who already knows all of this in-universe! It makes sense why he didn’t say any of those things explicitly!” This is a delightful and very well-crafted reading experience; Megan Whalen Turner is a queen of making these layers seamless, and she plays scrupulously fair in a way that other authors of unreliable narrators sometimes don’t. There are a few nagging lines that make sense on the first read and not quite as much sense on the second, but that’s to be expected, right? You can’t expect her to *perfectly* craft a surface story and a second layer.

This is all very nice - but it’s a bit so far, so normal. For me personally, when I read the first four Queen’s Thief novels in 2015, I enjoyed The Thief, but I’d read other novels that pulled many of the same moves. The *really* unhinging Queen’s Thief books for me were The Queen of Attolia and The King of Attolia, which play fast and loose with very excellent narration techniques, but aren’t told by Eugenides as an individual unreliable narrator in the same way as The Thief. The Thief fell under the radar for me a bit as more of a classic YA fantasy - fun, but I’d seen it before.

You know what I HAVEN’T seen before? A fun, classic, two-layer unreliable narrator story that retrospectively acquires a THIRD layer TWENTY-FOUR YEARS LATER.

Because the thing you need to understand is The Thief was published in 1996. The sixth and final book in the series, Return of the Thief, was published in 2020. Over that time, the series has had a consistently devoted fanbase, many of whom have pretty much been rereading the series nonstop for the 27 years since The Thief was published and noticing new things each time. ONLY in this context can you be chucked the ULTIMATE UNRELIABLE NARRATOR CURVEBALL: not just some fun new information about a previous book, but an entirely new layer of meaning that fundamentally reshapes this fun YA fantasy overshadowed by its flasher book siblings into a devastating novel that turns you into an emotional fucking wreck every time you reread if. The Thief was like a fun little friend to me. It was an easy palate-cleanser I could read to giggle at the antics of Eugenides my best friend Eugenides before his *REDACTED* is *REDACTED* and then he *REDACTED* later in the series. (Don’t worry about it.) Can you fucking IMAGINE the experience of reading this fun little friendly novel in middle school and hanging out with it for DECADES and then after those MULTIPLE DECADES Megan Whalen Turner goes “Oh by the way I have a new book for you with some fun new facts about what happens just before book 1. It changes the meaning a little bit :)" and you're like "Oh, fun!" and then you get thrown for a loop AGAIN, by the SAME unreliable narrator, who was hiding things from you AGAIN, but this time also from the in-universe audience and also possibly from himself, and there's now a RETROSPECTIVELY ENGINEERED SECOND ENTIRELY DIFFERENT TWIST ENDING, brought to you, and I cannot stress this enough, from TWENTY-FOUR YEARS in the future????

And on top of all that, the fucking nagging lines that didn't quite make sense? They make sense now. And they HURT. Lemony Snicket could never.

UNRELIABLE NARRATORS; FINALS.

Eugenides Propaganda:

the entire plot hinges on a detail he lets the reader (and every other character) assume is true. I don't want to spoil it because it's a really fun reveal but he is lying from the first second he appears on the page and you can't trust him to tell the full truth about ANYTHING related to himself and his goals. he mostly does it to keep his advantage and not have other characters be suspicious of him but it's just so fun when you realise he's been lying the whole time

Lemony Snicket Propaganda:

(I would like to preface this by saying that Lemony Snicket is the author's pen name, not a real person, and he exists as a character in-universe as well as being the one in-universe who writes the books!) I'd say he's unreliable because he spent time collecting information about the Baudelaire kids and then... wrote books about it. He has no idea what any of their dialogue actually was, what they were thinking, or even the whole plot, he's just doing research into the incidents and then filling in the gaps to make it a story. What ACTUALLY happened to the Baudelaires? Nobody really knows for sure

While the Baudelaire siblings are in potentially life threatening danger, he will randomly start talking about his own life and just leave the siblings hanging. For example, once Count Olaf was threatening to kill Violet, and then Lemony randomly began talking about how he met the love of his life at a costume party. This man CANNOT stay on topic. Usually when a new character is introduced, Lemony tells us right at the start that they’re either going to die or that the Baudelaire siblings will never see them again. Foreshadowing is not subtle in these books. CONSTANTLY emphasizes how miserable he feels while writing these books. At one point he admits that he had to put his pencil down and go cry for a while because of how sad it made him. Once he filled an entire page with nothing but the word “ever” to emphasize how dangerous it is to put forks in electrical outlets. He also repeated a paragraph about deja vu later on in the book to give the reader deja vu.