#this is VERY disrespectful to my intelligence; not to mention to the artist

[crumblinggothicarchitecture]

Hello! I’m curious to know if you listen to Hozier? Since his music also gives literary and it’d be interesting to know what you think!

Hello! Thanks for the ask

Hozier is wonderful! I love him!

I think he's incredibly creative, and he clearly knows how to write! He also clearly knows so much about the history of music, art, international politics, and so much more. There's nothing I admire more in an artist than some real intelligence. It shows in his command of the language. I've been listening since "Take Me to Church" went viral. I was absolutely in tears listening to that for the first time.

One point I've been thinking about lately is the way he wrote "Nina Cried Power" and how it's different from the way someone like Taylor Swift name-drops in her music.

The point here is that Hozier has immense respect for the people he mentions in the song, his obvious knowledge and respect for these people is ever-present. He thematically connects them from the perspective of their own lives into the message of the song. Meaning that it is the type of song they would co-sign. It's so moving for this very reason, it's like the people in his song are singing with him. In "Nina Cried Power" he's clearly using southern-inspired gospel-esque blues to sings about the way in which civil rights activists, and those musicians who broke the chains away, sang their activism into life. It's so lovely for him to use musicality stemming from Afro-American culture to sing about the major civil rights activist and artists from the era. He's literally brilliant, and I love his perspective on how the US civil rights movement impacted Irelands own civil rights movement. He's fucking brilliant.

And this line brings me to tears, "And I could cry power/ power has been cried by those stronger than me/ straight into the face that tells you to rattle your chains." He's so compelling both in storytelling and in intercultural dialogue. Beautiful. And how beautiful it is to remind us that no matter the location, your words and actions matter- activism matters. Power is with the people.

What a writer- what a message to send. Especially these days, when so many major public figures are refusing to speak on current events. How important it is to remind the public that there is no real reason to not speak up in times of injustice.

As opposed to Swift who can only name-drop people like Dylan Thomas in relation to being able to self-deprecate. Her impulse towards self-obsession shows in how she even represents the lives of others as ultimately being about her. It shows an immense disrespect and obvious distain for the people she writes about. She clearly only thinks about others when considering some hierarchal form of self-adulation. People are either better or worse than her- however, it is always about her. Dylan Thomas was an incredibly vocal activist and revolutionary spirit in his day, and Swift puts him in a cheap shot about herself? Painful, stupid, gag. Thomas was an avowed anti-fascist during the rise of the most horrific fascist regimes we've ever seen; as such he would be horrified at being eulogized by someone like Swift who lives and breathes money and power. I wish I could go back in time and unhear her besmirching his name.

Dylan Thomas would love Hozier though :) And so do I!

But anyway, I could totally write some literary criticism on Hozier, and you know what- it would be amazing because he is rich texture to dive into. His command of metaphor and mimetic technique is honestly so impressive! That actually sounds really fun and is totally on my to-do list now :)

[ohburgee]

𝐑𝐞𝐦𝐞𝐦𝐛𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐞𝐫

oc!ultramarines-lieutenant x fem-remembrancer!reader

tw: mention war/violence, blood an: my first Warhammer 40k fanfic I just want to share this 40k fanfic I have written, I've been a casual fan of 40k for 6 years but I've never been into it just know a bit about the lore/story, and being on memes and loved the war topic (blame my best friend for kidnapping me to join 40k), also spare me I'm still learning more about 40k I just know some bit. A little reminder I have some of my own content and not related to the 40k summary: you are a remembrancer and one day you pass by these so-called defenders of humanity, the Astartes, the ultramarines, and one of them, the lieutenant suddenly takes attention to you and takes advantage to ask about your planet's history after helping the lieutenant giving knowledge he caught you having arranged marrrigae and he already wanted you and has the plan to get you with him.

Being a remembrancer, an artist, and a journalist you are really smart and intelligent and very good at painting skills.

One time you were called by your nobles to paint them so you agreed and went to the palace carrying your stuff while walking you passed by those superhuman warriors so-called defenders of humanity, the space marines.

You peek out your head as you carry the bit heavy box, you see those blue armored as they march out of the palace, when you suddenly drop your brushes on the floor you turn around to get it, and when the pair of armored hands reach the brushes and point it to you.

You look at the Astartes, that's what they called letting you reach the brushes as you look up to see the taller one from the other Astartes, you slowly look up and see his helmet and stare at your tiny self.

You quickly took the brushes did a small bow and continued walking, as you walked away you could still feel the stare at you and you shook your head and continued walking fast.

...

After an hour of painting, you finish painting your noble request, take all your stuff, and get out of the room while walking your brushes fall again and you get annoyed and turn around and walk back.

Then the Astartes earlier was in front of you standing as he took the brushes once again and walked towards you handling the brushes.

"You always keep this falling little one," he said looking at him, he didn't wear his helmet but his armor was still on him, you admire his face clean-cut hair, a scar on his left eye, and those blue-grey eyes.

You took the brushes from his armored hand and bow then before you could walk, he quickly took your arm stopping you. I swear I don't have time for this, your mind said.

"You are a remembrancer?" He asked and you looked at him, is it obvious? "Yes my Lord" you replied and he nodded his head.

"I wanted to ask you about your planet since you are a remembrancer so you know everything about the history of your planet," he said asking you to tell him about your planet.

"We're here because of your resources it helps our imperium also to gain more association," he said and you slowly nodded your head, they visiting here to have some alliances.

"Well it was quite fine living here but often some cults around, chaos cults and the nobles are very welcomed and virtuous" You told him a few about it and he nodded his head.

Before you could say excuse he spoke again, "I want to know more, I know I'm Sorry for being disrespectful" You looked at him a bit annoyed but you didn't want to show that to this bloodthirsty machine-human you remember that they are monsterous and bloodthirster when they kill their enemies, the xenos.

"But it's for my assignment to gain more knowledge about your planet for the future and for the imperium," he said and that makes all explained you sighed in defeat and nodded your head, "Yes my Lord" you replied and he smiled and he gesture to let him carry the boxes you hesitate but he didn't stop and you gave to him letting him carry it.

As you two walk to your room or so-called your small house inside the palace, you are required to live near your nobles due to your arranged marriage to this lord's son who wanted you in marriage.

You shook your head letting that thinking out of your head when you realized there was an Astartes behind you, you forgot, does Space Marines allow this kind of assignment? You keep questioning yourself.

As you both arrived at your house you opened the door and let the Astartes inside as you pointed at him to put the boxes on the table behind and he did after that he looked around your small unique house.

He looks around admiring your works, the paintings, the sketches, the sculptures everything you have done as you stare at him, you notice how he admires your works more than the man you're going to marry, he was like "Yes good paintings" not even appreciated.

"You did all of this?" He asked sounding amazed bd that made you feel appreciated as he looked at you "Yes my Lord" you replied and he walked towards you "I forgot to introduce myself, I'm Callistus" he said his name was gorgeous sound like in an imperial, he is actually, you replied with your name and he smiled. Does Astartes allow that?

You break the stares and walk towards your small cooking area, "Do you want to drink so-" You cut your words when you realize that he can't hold a small teacup due to his armored hands and he looks at you confused.

"I forgot you have large hands," you said "It's fine I'm just here for histories," he said and you nodded your head and proceeded to make one for yourself instead.

After that, you stand behind the Astartes as you tell him about your planet and let him read the book that contains its history.

...

It's been 3 days since Callistus started to visit your room and tell him more about your planet's history. And you got to know that he was the lieutenant of ultramarines so that explained more since he is on the ranks of the space marines.

Now he was looking at the paintings you let him when you look at him, you notice how admirable he is and you see how his posture is very professional and serious.

You took your sketch and began to sketch his pose it's quite difficult to trace his armor since it has that paper hanging around his armored sort of thing. You don't really know space marines but know a bit about the imperium due to that your planet was not been visited by them.

Because your nobles don't want any related to the imperium, that's sound heretic but they just don't want to be involved in the war.

As you try to look at his armor when you notice his eyes looking straight at yours and you quickly put your sketchbook on the table and he chuckles.

"You know it's bad to draw someone without permission," he said "I'm sorry it's just admiration," you said and he nodded his head before you could speak you both heard a door knock and you excused yourself from him, and walked towards the door.

You opened the door and it was Lady Eda, the mother of the man you're going to marry, "Why are you not visiting your discussion with the marri-" "I'm sorry my lady I told that Lord Eddard that I'll be a company for Ultramarines Lieutenant" you said and she looked not happy with it and you heard footsteps coming from behind and Callistus went in front of you.

"I'm sorry my lady but your little remembrancer is on my duty, I'm sorry if she can't take your time but I promise to make her available for you," he said respectfully and Lady Eda nodded her head and walked away.

You closed the door and you sighed looking at Callistus looking at you "I'm very sorry for that my Lord" you said and did a low bow and he called your name softly and you raised your head.

"It's fine you are on my hands I should be the one to say sorry since I should let arrange my time" You shook your head and said it was fine.

Then you walk towards the table where he is and he walks behind you, "You're going on marriage" he asks and you turn around to look at him "Arrange marriage" "I see you seem you don't want to", "Yes I don't want to, it's just I don't want to be married not on this situation the world has" you said as you we're almost yell.

"Why would they even think about this, do they know how this world is right now, the war, the bloodthirsty war happening outside," you said as you let out that angry words.

"The devastating war going on, the dead of its humanity and they still have to think about this, I know you know this you are one of the defenders the one who sacrificed for humanity for us for the imperium, for the emperor himself" he looked at you listening as he feels pity and found truth from your words.

"They don't see the blood scattered around the blood of the human defending its own humanity, that's why the imperium doesn't want us on this planet to be part of it" you added and sighed you really took all it out and you look at him "I'm sorry once again my Lord I just can't take it," you said and he nods his head and patted your both shoulders.

You told him to forget everything you said and continue to help him and before you both continued you heard a knock you walked towards the door and opened it to see one of the ultramarines, "Is Lieutenant here my lady?" "Yes, I am here" You turn to look at Callistus walking towards the door.

"Sir the lord wants you," he said and Callistus nodded his head he looked at you and he patted your shoulder again and bid goodbye and you did too.

...

She was just a normal living remembrancer why would they even let her have in marriage.

Perhaps a connection with her family or for her knowledge and having priority for it, Callistus can't stop thinking about you being in that situation.

He admires you, adores you the way you teach him about history, and giving him more details is just like a woman in the light giving him peace, was there peace?

But it's rare to find such like that in this darkest world and he feels found a rare thing and he can't let it go, he needs to capture it and bring it with him, and it's you.

He wanted you, he wanted you to have a normal life being a remembrancer not living in this nearly heretic life.

He got the idea to get you since it's allowed them to have a remembrancer, he can have one and he chooses you to be.

He went towards the lord of the palace and asked if he could have you being his remembrancer and go with him and the lord didn't hesitate to accept it and he didn't care about the marriage arranged for you since it was his wife's idea and it's just stupid and useless thing.

Very well, it was easy to get you...

...

You were in your room sketching some faces on nobles when you heard a knock and you walked towards your door and opened it and it was Callistus holding his helmet on his arms.

"Oh, my lord do you need something?" you ask and he shakes his head "I'm here to tell you to pack your things," he said and you look at him confused and you notice an Astartes behind him.

"What do you mean, my lord?" you ask and he chuckled and replied "You're coming with me," he said and your eyes widened...

After a minute you are done packing your things and you decide to leave your work here and say last goodbye to the small peaceful house you have been living in and start to walk out of the room and follow Callistus.

You both walk past the man you're going to marry and he stops in front of you "Look you don't have to be like that, I know you don't want to go with him" he says and you feel disgusted as you really don't like him and remember what he did to you when you were just a lower person.

"You are born here, and you will stay here forever, you can't just move aw-" he was cut off by Callistus as he took his arm, "Try to threaten my remembrancer or your face will be crushed on the ground," Callistus said as he grips his arm tightly and that made more pain due the armored.

He hissed from pain and Callistus let go of his arm and told you to continue walking as you passed him scared and terrified.

"You made me your own remembrancer?" You ask Callistus and he nods his head and you look surprised, "Why?" You ask again and he stops in front of you and he tells his brother to carry your things to the spacecraft.

He turned around and slowly walked closer to you and he looked down at your small figure, "You were rare to find in his world" he said as his eyes stared at yours those admiring eyes.

"I like the way you help me, telling me about it, and the art you made was the most unique I've seen, you know that skills you have must be appreciated more" he added as he patted your shoulder on his other hand as he still carries his helmet.

"That's why I wanted you to be my remembrancer but I want your answer, your acceptance," he said and you nodded your head "What is it my Lord," you asked him.

"Will you be willing to dedicate your life for this?" He asked and your look widened as those words came, you had a bit of difficulty thinking but found answers.

"Yes I will my Lord" you replied accepting and he smiled he thought you would reject it but he was wrong and proud hearing your acceptance.

[juszar2]

The sick obsessed prior employment partner I'd known what it was, and so when we were set to host lunch with an out of state potential business partner to bring services to the area, I was focused and had to encounter the sick obsessed up in arms telling me that Child Protective Services had come in and removed all of the children from the home of an immediate family member. She went on trying to tell me who she thought was responsible for reporting conditions. I did not want to know and she was again crossing lines that I'd been forever consistently trying to keep the boundaries in tact. All that I said was that I did not believe that the person would have done that. I changed the subject and tried to solidify the business deal. All that I could think of is how this obsessed could not see the gross that it had been likely over entire life and correlate the CPS situation. So this person attacked me for a good span of time obsessing and I had no idea... To include it saying that the disrespect and gross is also what it has "taught" its own. All of that.... And it cannot see how its deeds and the real self is nothing that could approach integrity. If a woman removes herself from your sick obsessed fixated "setup" con artist, demonic lowly behavior and spirit... You then attack her on a forum and obsess and discuss her. It is the most severe effort to reduce someone that I've ever heard of. Someone you did not even have a conflict with... So what would one say that this Sicko's problem is. Literal if she gets the hell away from, I'm stalking her. This and more is what this person is. Had tried to sabotage my exit, and then when God moved around it to let me out, opportunity accepted, it had been laying a scheme all the while grinning in my face and praising asking that I "believe in the mission" it's mission was to keep an income and favor in its presence.... By whatever means. Who in life has ever encountered this?

I'd have to live my entire life twice and get started now to compare to the lowliness and deeds this -it- has been. It makes no sense that you embark on such...but it could not imagine that I'd remove myself quite quietly and never see it again. That was apparently disallowed. Or else it said it would want to harm me. I found that so gross and still do today. I could vomit when I talk about, show it to other professionals, or think of it. Disgusting. I really could not believe the stalker that I inspire in some freaks. To be a person who is most often very quiet, but intelligent and I observe but... Silently. I thought to myself this has to be the worst case of obsession I've experienced yet. I really like private, dignified life so I knew that I needed to remove myself.

It found liabilities and like Satan does... Con's and pulls strings, sows division and brings conflict and turmoil. God forbid that I could have wiped any trace of the rot from my life. It is shocking. The con does not work on me. And so I will assist you but when the snake shows it's hissing at my life, I go ahead and remove myself from the snake. So odd that it had slithered with those unwise, especially at this age. But they're good at finding the weak. That one is older than me having had serious situations and is interested in having reproduced its sickness. And documented so. This is why there exists what does. It is ignorance, lowly, no dignity, no class, just personified and unbelievable. I don't try and understand it, I just don't want to live near it, know it, or have it obsessing over me. And again.... I was not even aware that this pining and obsession was following me. Had joined up with the homosexual. All I knew was that there was a lot of the element coming in and staff would mention the whole women living as men situation and more. But I would tell them I hadn't noticed and didnt even know this was such a prevalent thing. I lived a sheltered but respectful life. So everyone could do what they felt suitable for them. It just feels so gross every aspect of these people and knowing this possible toilet is like a woman and let folks see him used. Quite shocking. But there is even more than that with the prior employment partner sicko. The fencing, intercepting food funds in the US mail as it was processed, and even more is the rot that I lowered myself to assist and it did what it is... And showed folks publicly. And is certainly still stalking. Shocking. This whole situation is gross and if I'd not met a weak toilet paper outlined here on this blog, these low life's and adolescent homosexual stalker would be nowhere near my life. But it appears that there is a bitch*able slime like woman that I thought was a man who has caused this. It is shocking. This person claims conservatism and lies all day I know now. Quite shocking how far people can fall and what they would have attached to their name and life legacy. Otherwise they'd have to stalk me from outside of my life and discuss amongst themselves their feelings about a woman who wants absolutely nothing to do with them. Maybe still be so sever that they'd have still taken to a forum... But outside my life. Strange to live in the world knowing you are not a public figure... But you're stalked and you have met the lowest possible and he had me connect my life to him in an unchangeable way.

[orsino-the-enchanter]

please don't reblog or interract with @v*lsfanart. They ship jowan with uldred (yeah i know lol) in a disgusting abuse way and you dont wanna support that. that blog is vile :)

*sigh* I will answer to these messages just this once, since you anon deemed to “inform” me in a rather civilized way. 

I know @valsfanart  ships Jowan and Uldred, however I feel that he’s getting a lot of undeserved backlash about it. Yes I’ve seen the fanart and yes I can understand how it may appear as abusive, however there is a lot of depth into it. He absolutely does NOT want to normalize abuse; quite the opposite; through his art he wants to explore the intricate and disturbing psychological mechanisms that make someone go through that and not walk away from it -like Stockholm’s syndrome. Its purpose IS to disturb the reader, not to glorify abuse. It does what all art should be doing in my opinion, answer complex questions by simply pointing at the issue.

 Also, his artistic vision is to turn pain into art; a vision I wholeheartedly endorse, because life IS pain and if we don’t find any beauty in it then how different is it from plain torture? Paint this as vile if you want, but bear in mind that is your own interpretation, not a universal truth. You don’t like it, don’t look at it; others may see beauty where you don’t. 

Needless to say that identifying with a character to the degree of hating others for their interpretation and be personally victimized by it is problematic to say the least.

To sum up, it is unfortunate if you cannot appreciate the art -it is an acquired taste, after all- however I need remind you of the essentials of internet surfing etiquette:

You are the only one responsible for your own media experience and nobody else. Trigger warnings are there for a reason.

There is such a thing as a healthy level of avoidance towards topics that make you feel unwell or even (in a real-life clinical definition of the term) trigger you -but you are the one to actively take care of what you view.

Avoiding does not mean policing others about whom they should or shouldn’t interact with.

You have no right to tell artists or writers to censor themselves - you may criticize what others do, you may dislike it, that’s fine - but actively asking for censorship when you could easily unfollow or block a person just makes you look incompetent in your use of the internet.

[writingwithcolor]

I have a black character who comes from a family of politicians (Mother and Father). I'm writing a plot where he feels a certain pressure to follow in his parents footsteps, but he really wants to do something else. Are there any specific "dream careers" i should avoid for him? I was originally thinking of making him love animals to the point of wanting to be a vet, or maybe enjoying the science side of things, or maybe wanting a career in philosophy, since that's a big part of his character.

Career Choices for your Black Character

All your ideas are great. Career with animals, STEM, philosophy…any of them would be wonderful. I feel as if there isn’t a lot of representation of Black people in those mentioned careers. Pick what you think best suits your character.

When choosing a career for a Black person, there is very little to “avoid” outright in my opinion. Whether you make them an artist, chef, explorer, plumber, doctor - whatever career you think of, I can bet there’s probably not a lot of representation there.

Now, there are a couple exceptions. These careers are not off-limits, but there’s some context to understand.

Careers to choose thoughtfully 

Hospitality 

There is a trend of typecasting Black people in caregiver roles. Think nanny, housekeeper, janitor, etc. This typecast often affects Latine people and other POC as well. Such careers may also draw comparisons to servitude. 

Historically, these careers hold power dynamics - aka being “the help” for, most often, well-off white people. There were times when these were the main jobs Black people could get. 

And it was take it or leave it, if you wanted to support your family.

Takeaways

Yes, there is nuance and power dynamics to consider, but these are still valid careers for anyone. 

These jobs require an array of hard and soft skills. There’s a talent for cleaning or properly caring for children. So when portraying people in these roles, it should be given the proper respect. These aren’t easy jobs!

Some of these jobs can pay well. Of course, this may vary by region and employer. Personally, I know a couple of janitors (Midwest, USA) who do very well for themselves. 

Such roles and power-dynamics balances out even better when you have folks who can answer for themselves, can or are empowered to accept or reject jobs, and aren’t at the mercy of disrespectful clients. 

For example: 

Business owners (Perhaps someone who owes a housekeeping company, a daycare etc.)

Self-employed individuals 

Directors, leads, managers, or supervisors

Employees at companies that don’t follow “the customer is always right” like policies

Do not define characters by their jobs. Just because they serve people for work doesn’t make them subservient or that they live to serve in all areas of life. People have lives and personalities outside of their job. 

Physical labor jobs

Roles related to physical strength and labor, such as carpenters, construction, contractors, laborers, may have similar connections to servitude with the addition of aiding the Strong Black Person role, typically aimed at men in this case. 

Takeaways

The details I used to describe in hospitality roles can apply here. 

Despite any “snooty” social associations, these are in fact skilled jobs that require a lot of talent, bodily-kinesthetic and spatial intelligence. 

It’s another job type that folks can make good money in (again, may depend on location, roles, etc.). Either way, the skills that come with their work are highly admirable, sought after and needed in our societies.

Again - What you’ll want to avoid here is making someone their job. Just because they do physical labor in their jobs does not mean they’re “Strong” in every other way. People are not invisible and without emotional vulnerability.

Music and Entertainment

When people want to create a successful Black character, the first thought is often the entertainment industry. That is, creators and entertainers of all kinds. From athletes, comedians and musicians. 

This is where the line between stereotype and culture can get confusing. For many Black people, creativity and striving for excellence in these areas is inherited. There’s cultural significance to many art forms that is passed down through generations and stoked by the community. Let’s take the appreciation and talent for music as example. Songs and spirituals are historically part of the culture. It involved over time into many styles, and you’ll see the touch of Black excellence in so many music genres! So overall interest is passed on and cherished, leading many Black folks predisposed to flourish in these talents.

Takeaways

Like the other roles, It’s okay to portray Black people in these roles. Oftentimes, there’s a certain cultural / community appreciation that is fed, leading to many talented Black artists of all kinds. 

This isn’t to say everyone is musically, athletically or overall creatively gifted. So, as always, you shouldn’t equate being Black for the reason someone is gifted or meant for any role (e.g. He’s Black, so he has to be naturally good at basketball!)

I must reiterate yet again: People are not their jobs. Just because someone’s a performer doesn’t mean they lead their lives to entertain and create for others at all times. 

A note on sports

I did want to mention sports related careers, such as football and basketball players. There’s a bit of Black people are Strong / naturally athletic “Positive” typecasting that happens here. This makes athletes a go-to role for Black people, particularly men.

Avoid choosing such roles simply because you think they are the only ones that should naturally a Black man or person. While there’s plenty of athleticism there, which again, may be encouraged and fed by society, it doesn’t define a whole race or race/gender.

Overall takeaway

1) The job is not the person

When choosing a career for your Black character, the important thing is that their personality and life is not defined by the role. 

Just because you’re in a hospitality role doesn’t mean you’re subservient or submissive, no matter what you do for the job (in exchange for money, at that). And just because your job requires physical labor doesn’t mean you are invincible and emotionally strong at all times.

2) Don’t typecast your character

Do not give any role to a character of any group because “it makes the most sense because they’re Black / Chinese / Insert race here!” No one group is a monolith. So while I don’t feel there’s off-limits careers for Black characters exactly, just keep in mind that you’re choosing a career that suits the person. Not what you think should suit them because they’re Black.

It’s great to explore roles that Black people are underrepresented within, in real life and media, instead of the ones we tend to see in abundance or because they fit what we're told is the natural role for certain people.

~Mod Colette

[ijustwant2write]

A Secret Romantic-Benedict Bridgerton x Reader x Eloise Bridgerton (Platonic)

(GIF credit to @aryaofoldstones​)

Requested by anonymous: ‘Hello! I saw your looking for Bridgerton requests, I would love some Benedict x Eloise sibling fluff! They have such a good dynamic in the show and I need more’

(I wouldn’t mind making another part of this if people want it tbh)

Characters: Benedict Bridgerton x Reader, Eloise Bridgerton x Reader (platonic)

Meanings: (Y/N)=Your name

(Y/L/N)=Your last name

Warnings: Fluff, fluff, fluff

                                     *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Eloise’s gloved hands clung onto her book as she and her family arrived at yet another social event, a ball once again. Her mama had ensured she was dressed to catch the eyes of men, and Eloise knew that meant there would be no room for intelligent conversation. With Daphne now married to the Duke, Eloise had more pressure on her shoulders than she imagined, having to find a suitor of similar standards. However, it wasn’t just her on the market, her brothers were too, especially Benedict (Violet knew it would be extremely difficult to marry off Anthony first, opting for the second eldest son).

Eloise smiled whenever her mama looked her way, though it quickly disappeared once she turned around. Benedict had been instructed to escort her sister around the ball to help seek out suitors, the men knew each other or something about someone; he could help her meet the right one.

“I cannot believe I am here.” Eloise moaned as she looped her arm through her brothers.

“Believe me sister, I do not wish to be here either.”

“Why must you parade me around like a horse at a dressage in order to find a new owner?” Eloise kept catching the men’s gazes, turning up her nose in disgust.

“So dramatic.” he chuckled.

She scoffed.“Well, if you’re going to advise me on who I should be marrying, I shall do the same for you. Now let’s see...”

Eloise looked around the room at all the women, wondering who would be the best match for her brother. Most of these women had no personalities, relying on their outfits to express themselves. Eloise knew of some ladies that were nice, though had nothing in common with her brother.

Eloise shrugged, tugging on her brother’s arm towards the door.“Ah, there’s no one here for us. Let us make haste and leave-”

“Oh no you don’t,” Benedict pulled her back,“we have been strictly told to stay for the night, even if it is just to socialise and...get our names out there.”

Eloise groaned a little too loudly, Ben ducking his head in embarrassment.“How long do these balls go on for?”

“I have never stayed for the full duration.”

“That’s not the answer I want to hear.”

Benedict glanced down at her, somehow only just realising that Eloise had brought a book with her.“Is that book sewed to your hand sister?”

“I brought it just in case I became bored. Which I am already.”

“I shall go and grab us some refreshments. Might as well enjoy them whilst we’re here.”

Eloise let her brother slip away, quickly finding a hiding spot by leaning up against a wall, away from the hustle and bustle of the crowds. She opened her book, continuing where she left off, happy she brought a pencil to scribble down notes for later. The studying never stopped for Eloise. 

“Excuse me?” a woman’s voice interrupted her too soon.

Eloise tried her best to be polite, though her smile came off as sarcastic.“Yes?”

“Sorry,” the woman looked taken back,“I thought you were reading a book that I am reading at the moment, but I was wrong. I’ve disturbed you, I shall leave you alone-”

“Wait,” Eloise had now sparked an interest. No other lady had ever approached her like this,“I don’t mean to be rude. What book had you expected?”

“It’s oh so obvious, but I’ve been reading ‘Pride and Prejudice’ by Jane Austen. It’s the newest book out at the moment, and my mama lets me read it seeing as it involves a woman finding someone to marry. Although, it’s definitely about something deeper, that’s just what I told her.”

“I don’t indulge in romantic novels myself, but I am glad to hear of a female author selling her work.”

“It’s fantastic. And it’s nice to be able to read something without it being snatched out of my hands. Oh, where are my manners? I’m (Y/N) (Y/L/N). Sorry, I’ve been dancing with men all night and none of the conversations have been as riveting as this so far.”

“Why am I not surprised?” they both laughed.“I’m Eloise Bridgerton.”

(Y/N) tried to not show her shock when she heard the surname. They were only the most talked about family, her mama had gone on and on about them, especially when Lady Whistledown mentioned them in her writings. 

“It’s a pleasure to meet you. Might I ask what it is that you are reading?”

“It is to do with my studies. I truly hate these events, so I thought I would ensure my mind was being worked properly.” Eloise realised that could come off as rude, squeezing her eyes shut in embarrassment.“I did not mean to offend you by that.”

“It really isn’t any bother.” (Y/N) giggled.“I rather enjoy these just for the dancing and drinks, I find promenading to be more successful in finding a suitor. Though I would much rather sneak off and see if I can get a few more pages in of a book I shouldn’t be reading.”

“Eloise, why must you go wondering off like that...” Benedict’s words trailed off as he approached his sister, spotting a beautiful woman stood by her.

Eloise’s eyes flickered between the two, and she smiled when she saw the adoration in her brother’s eyes. Cheekily taking the two glasses from his hands, she passed one to (Y/N), who awkwardly took it. (Y/N) had gazed upon the Bridgerton men in passing, they were very nice to look at. Of course, she never divulged in any fantasies about them, that would be silly. But seeing one in front of her had taken her breath away.

“Thank you brother.” Eloise said, taking a sip.“This is Lady (Y/N) (Y/L/N), a new friend of mine.”

He gently took her free hand in his, bending forwards slightly to kiss it. (Y/N) had this done to her many times, but this was different. Benedict made her feel butterflies in her stomach. Eloise could tell her mama was going to love this.

She cleared her throat.“We were just speaking of art, actually.”

(Y/N) furrowed her eyebrows.“We were talking about books.”

“I was about to move the topic along.”

“What kind of art would that be then?” Benedict asked, knowing what game his sister was playing. 

“The...drawing, kind.”

“Isn’t all art drawn?”

“No, it is also painted.”

“I think artists may sketch out a rough idea before painting.”

“Well you would know brother, seeing as you yourself are an artist.”

“I wouldn’t say that-”

“You paint, Lord Bridgerton?” (Y/N) asked.

“Ah, yes, and I sketch.” he hoped his cheeks weren’t turning red. 

“Anything in particular?”

“Mostly people.”

“Are you both attending the art exhibition my family are holding next week?”

“That’s your families’ exhibit?” Benedict became excited.

“Yes, my father collects a lot of art work. Then mother realised she could make a social event out of it, but at least everyone will be able to admire the work.”

“Would you believe it, we already have it noted down in our social calendar!” Eloise informed (Y/N). Benedict could sense her over-reacting, trying to keep a smile as (Y/N)’s face lit up in excitement. 

“Perfect!” (Y/N) looked back up at Ben, making him stand a little taller.“It will be nice to have someone there who knows about the artwork. It will make for an interesting conversation. Just don’t let my father lecture you, he will talk for far too long! And I know you will be too polite to try and get away.”

“My brother is very polite.” Eloise said.“In fact, I’m surprised he hasn’t-”

“Excuse me for the intrusion,” a young man said from beside (Y/N),“but I was wondering if we could resume our dance lady (Y/N)?”

(Y/N) was smiling, but Eloise knew that look; it was the face women made when a man who made them uncomfortable approached, but they had to remain ladylike and polite.

“Actually my brother just asked her and she said yes. You two best make your way to the floor before the music starts again.” Eloise nudged her brother.

Benedict was confused at his sisters offer, until he locked eyes with (Y/N) again. They were pleading him to sweep her away, she was even leaning away from this man. He had been disrespectful in some way, and he wasn’t letting (Y/N) go through that again (despite only knowing the girl for a few minutes). He smugly smiled at the man, holding out his arm which (Y/N) took a little too quickly. Eloise was happy with herself as the pair walked off, sending the man a death glare when he asked her to dance instead. Once he left, her eyes went back to find her brother, who was already dancing with (Y/N), both smiling and laughing. Her mama was going to be ecstatic about this. 

                                       *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Eloise sat in the drawing room, obviously lounging with a book. Her younger siblings were being irritating as usual, running around her in circles. Before they arrived, she had peace. Eloise wanted a few moments alone, because she knew her mama would be bursting with questions about the night before.

“Ah, there you are.” Violet said as she walked in.

The book flopped into Eloise’s lap, a frown on her face. There goes her reading time.

“So, how was last night? Did you meet anyone?” her mama sat beside her.“You two, go play outside if you’re going to run around please.”

The children stopped as their mama spoke, sending each other devilish grins before they ran out of the room again, their giggling echoing down the halls. Violet went to shout after them, but decided to leave it be, there were more pressing matters.

“Well mama, do you see any suitors?” Eloise gestured around her.

Violet sighed.“Did you even try last night?”

“My life will not be reduced to a single night where I was forced to peacock around in order to please a man.”

“Oh, Eloise, must you make everything so dramatic?”

“Funny, Benedict said the same thing.”

“Actually, where is your brother? I have not seen him all morning.”

“He went out.” Eloise was relieved that the focus would now be off of her.“He’s calling upon a lady.”

Violet’s eyes widened.“What? When? Who?”

“Lady (Y/N) (Y/L/N).”

“(Y/L/N)? They are quite reputable.”

Eloise rolled her eyes.“Mama, she is a lovely girl. I don’t think you should just judge her on what family she comes from.”

“Oh, so you approve of this girl?”

“I...I mean...Well, I only spoke with her for a mere few minutes.”

“But?”

Eloise let out a huff.“I enjoyed her company. I think Benedict likes her. I didn’t see him for the rest of the night until it was time to leave. He spent all his time with her.”

Violet became overjoyed.“Oh, what marvelous news! I wish he had told me. Do you know what he took to her? Flowers? Food?”

“I have no idea mama. Just wait for his return and he will tell you all the details. I am not a psychic.”

Violet was impatient as she awaited the return of her son. Poor Collin had also been questioned when he showed up in the drawing room, but he had overslept in bed, waking with a terrible headache. It seemed that it was about to come back to him when his mama bombarded him with questions as to why he hadn’t called upon anyone that morning. Eloise kept her giggles quiet, ducking behind her book when Collin sent her daggers.

Poor Benedict had no idea what was in store for him. His cheeks were aching from how much he was smiling. He wasn’t surprised when he arrived at the (Y/L/N)’s house and saw multiple callers for (Y/N). However, jealousy rose inside him when he thought about these men dancing with her, trying to convince her that they were the man to marry. He held a beautiful bouquet of flowers, remembering that (Y/N) had mentioned her favourite the night before. Looking around at any other flowers she received, he was glad to see no other gentleman had chose it. Surely that would show he was listening? He endured sonnets, stories, songs and boasting from the other men, trying not to show his dissatisfaction as each one stepped forward. There was pressure that her parents were there, especially when he realised he was the last gentleman, everyone else had left.

(Y/N) had been incredibly anxious when she saw Benedict that morning. He had been the only man she genuinely smiled at, hoping he came at his own will, not forced by his mama. The night before had been the best ball (Y/N) had ever been to. Benedict was sweet, charming, handsome and interesting. They were able to talk about anything and everything, no small talk involved like all the other men she danced with. He had swooned her, and here he was, calling upon her. 

Back at the Bridgerton house, Violet had not sat down since talking Collin’s ear off. Eloise was still in the drawing room with her, as were her two youngest siblings, munching on biscuits as they threw questions at their mama. She did not have all the answers, sometimes not even hearing them speak for she was too deep in her thoughts. At one point, she did sit, but beside the window, o the lookout for any signs of her son. When a carriage pulled up in front of the house, Violet leapt out of her seat, startling her children. She made a beeline to the door, standing there with her hands clasped together. When Benedict walked in, he too flinched, not expecting his mama to be there.

“Mama, how long have you been stood there?” Benedict asked as he walked past her, pinching a biscuit from his brother’s plate.

“She’s been waiting for you.” Eloise explained, also excited to hear about his calling.

“I hope you sat down at some point.” he joked, sitting beside Eloise and slouching.

Violet hurried to sit on the sofa across him.“You didn’t tell me you were calling on a lady this morning.”

“Well, we got back late from the ball yesterday evening, and I had to leave early to ensure I got there in good time. Though it seemed every other man thought that too.”

“There were many men there?” 

“Yes, quite a few.”

Eloise straightened up at her brother’s grumpy expression.“You really like her!”

“How wonderful!” Violet gushed. 

“Do not get ahead of yourselves.”

“But you do, don’t you? Otherwise you wouldn’t have called on her.”

Ben was lost for words. He couldn’t argue with that, and he did like seeing his mama happy.“Yes, yes I do. And it would seem she reciprocates the feelings.”

“This is such good news! I must see what our social calendar looks like, we must ensure you two spend time together.”

“Actually mama-” Eloise went to tell her about the art exhibit until Ben interrupted.

“Good idea mama.” he nodded, smiling at her as she walked away, a spring in her step. Once she was gone, he let out a big breath.“I just needed a moment without questions from her.”

“Well, you’re going to have questions from me.” Eloise angled her body to face him, her elbow perched on the sofa with her face resting in her hand.“I didn’t think you were going to call upon her. Are my match making skills really that good?”

“I hate to admit it, but yes, you have done an excellent job.” Benedict felt relaxed thinking about (Y/N).

“So, what happened this morning?”

“I took her flowers, she told me her favourites last night, and then I had to sit there whilst her other gentleman callers desperately tried to impress her. It was agony! Finally I was able to have time with her, and it was just...I don’t know how to put it into words.”

“Did you bring her anything else?”

Benedict became bashful.“I brought her a sketchbook, like the one I have. She mentioned how she used to often sketch when she was younger. I thought it would be a unique gift.”

“Benedict, you truly are a romantic at heart.”

“For her I am, yes.”

Eloise smiled for her brother, until a smirk fell on his face.“What? Why are you looking at me like that?”

“Aw, is someone also a secret romantic?”

“No!” Eloise protested, quickly grabbing her book again.“I am just happy you found someone.”

“And you helped, because you secretly want everyone to find someone.”

“No I don’t! You’re ruining this moment now Benedict.”

“Don’t worry Eloise, you’ll find someone.” Ben joked.

She groaned.“You are insufferable...but I still want to go to that art exhibit.”

“To see love bloom?”

“N-no, to see the art work.”

“Of course, of course. But, thank you Eloise.”

She tried not to smile, but couldn’t help it.“You’re welcome.”

[caw4brandon]

Send this to 10 or more people you value and love so much here.

Thank you but also, this is hard to choose ~

Tumblr mutuals to my knowledge, is a seasonal thing. It flickers month after month. Like Fire in the face of great winds. So I can't play favouritism. But this does not mean I don't acknowledge and value you. I very much do. Now here's my list;

@audreyafterhours - for being the supportive spot that cheered me up in my [Loki post]

@lisindrw - for being such a sweetheart and curious listener to my creation and scrapped ideas.

@hphm-jeniferltheman - for her indirect influence that rekindled my fire to draw once more.

@yoselin-uyu - for being down so bad over my characters that it's basically food for her right now. (I'm joking)

@katherinelilac - a newcomer to the Hood. Even though it's a little hard to follow now.

@madelineorionswanwan - for being the calm and collective person that despite our differences still finds all kinds of topics to talk about.

@usernoneexistent - a very emotionally mature and intelligent person who has been there since this page's gremlin stage.

@amerrymystery - the first and still biggest fan of Sadie who praises her entire existence. They are also a very good friend.

@acecandraw - the wholesome, aspiring youngling I look up to for her bravery and will to get out there and reach out.

It feels a little disrespectful to just list 10 so I have a few more honorable mentions.

@aleapple1216 - my indirect creation because I suggested the name; Arlene hahah (I’m kidding, its all you mate!)

@oneirataxia-girl / @magical-retales - she was there since the start.

@stupendousbookworm - on hiatus now but a very talented artist.

@themilkshanghai - highly underrated. Deserves more attention than she actually does.

@krinkitori - young aspiring artist. Is trying her best out there and deserves love.

@starriddler - a very homely artist. Good ole pencil and paper! Very talented soul.

@night-rhea - one where I would consider as the first official friend I made on Tumblr and finally,

@theguythatdraws - this guy is the prime example of < Never Gonna Give You Up > always there as the first responder. You are not just some guy, you are the man! 

[aquamotto]

Polish School of Magic or what Rowling gets wrong about Poland

In short: many things. 

The only mentions of polish wizards come from two instances - some Quidditch team  (Grodzisk Goblins) and Hagrid’s visit to Europe (with some goblin mention, again). 

Why goblins, anyway? There is no such creature in real polish mythology. Instead, there are much more Harry Potter-esque things such as: Beast of Krakow, Dragon of the Wawel Hill who is the most famous and ferocious creature in all Eastern Europe. The majestic power of this beast can only be matched with majestic power of its city of dwelling - Krakow, to put it simply, is the city of Polish kings.

Below: Krakow, the city of “goblins”, according to JKR:

But let me guess - goblin invokes this image of rudeness and primitivity that probably comes from british understanding of poles as construction workers and such. It is curious that nuanced portrayal of poor people that is reserved for characters like Snape is not allowed to poles. They are “goblins” but Snape is a “working class hero”.  

 What I will describe below, is my headcanon based on what I imagine Wizarding Poland to really be like, sans goblins and other imperialist fantasies but based on my own observation of Poland as both pole and outsider (because, unfortunately, I am both).

Personality,  culture

Quidditch champion image as rude and loud lads couldn’t be farther from the truth. Polish wizards, much like their friends in neighboring Czech Republic, are wise, eccentric, philosophical and brave people. They have been blessed and cursed with difficult history (Such as Partition of Poland and German and Soviet Invasion) and know very well how to operate in secrecy. In fact, they are the most secretive of all european wizards and if muggle were to accuse them of witchcraft, they would deny the fact to their last breath. In the same time, polish wizards love magic and often risk everything to pursue their next magical experiment. They are prone to be idealistic and live with their head in the clouds, sometimes literally, which can lead to both troubles and brilliant inventions.

Some believe that Nicolaus Copernicus, the genius astronomer who placed the Sun at the center of the Universe, was a polish wizard (painting by polish artist Jan Matejko):

This image of genius, sudden discoveries and epiphanies is valued in Poland to the point that students of Polish School of Magic wear stars indicating their year on their uniforms - to honor Copernicus. 

However, poles aren’t Ravenclaws in disguise - they are traditional, obedient and lawful people at the core and no polish wizard, even the smallest first year, would dare to cheek their headmaster or teacher the way Harry and co. do. 

Teacher - student relationship is sacred in Poland and it’s almost like your second parent -  someone to be treated with utmost respect. This can lead to quite harsh hierarchies in Wizarding Poland. 

Looks

Polish wizards dress modestly, colorful suits Weasley Twins style are not for them. They can sometimes even look monk-like (or medieval knight-like) in appearance. Since Poland is filled with minor aristocracy called szlachta (and I am proud to belong to it, too*) many polish wizards openly wear their coat of arms on their clothes. (*If you are wondering whether I have a coat of arms - yes, I do).

Polish School of Magic uses dark red monk-like hoods with more normal suit under as an unifroms.  Since they want to be the guardians of well respected traditions, it fits them. 

This doesn’t mean that poles are somber, though. They can be playful but in their distinct, “I challenge you” way. They can be competitive and fiery to the highest degree, especially when their honor or honor of their school is involved. They are indeed the most patriotic of all wizards, thinking of themselves as separated not only from muggles but from foreigners too.

Relationship with muggles

Polish wizards do not like muggles very much but unlike Britain, it rarely comes in a form of hostility but rather patronizing and light mockery. Rather than valuing pure blood,poles just think of themselves as superior to muggles in intelligence.They are especially suspicious of muggle disrespect of culture and the past which leads to wizards thinking that muggles are morally and spiritually, rather than genetically, impure. However, there was never an attempt to deny muggleborns education - in fact, they are welcomed with open arms and often even relief - “Finally, another one of us!”. This makes them a bit closer to Grindelwald’s idea of superiority than Voldemort’s one.

Music

Anyone knows Chopin, the great french-polish composer and indeed, poles adore music. To the point that Polish School of Magic considers participation in a school choir mandatory. But highest praise is reserved for those who dare and pick up an instrument (be it violin, cello, horn, piano or something else) to join the School Orchestra. If Triwizard Tournament accepted Poland, they would arrive in most curious way possible - operating the giant musical machine which would look like a church organ mixed with piano and other instruments. The headmaster would play it and the students (dressed in cloaks) would accompany him with some strange melody to make the grandest entrance ever. 

Polish School of Magic

Pictured below: Frombork

Thanks to Copernicus, magical astronomy and astrology are best subjects to learn in Polish School of Magic. Unlike their colleagues in Prague who are obsessed with alchemy, potions and dark arts, poles are more interested in the spiritual so they also value divination in any forms and defense against the dark arts. Since living in a country as difficult as Poland forces you to  always be on your toes, teachers consider it important to teach their students nonverbal magic as soon as possible. They also encourage wandless magic and actually had a lot of luck with it (unlike other european schools). Thanks to a certain WW2 incident, they also offer a superior course of arithmancy (If you know what I am hinting at, well done!) 

Pictured: Frombork Cathedral Bell Tower

Since poles are not very practical people, they don’t teach their students about Magical Creatures at all (aside from a side course on dangerous creatures such as dragons in DADA). This just doesn’t fit their heady aesthetics. Being honest and reliable people, they also dislike transfiguration - something about turning things into animals and other things strikes them as unnecessary cruel and even devilish. Being pious at the core, poles want magic to always come from the source of respect and light. That’s why almost all students leave the school with full patronuses - most common of which is a white eagle, of course - the symbol of Poland. Poles are often so patriotic that even their best memories are linked to their national identity!

Poles are also good at charms and make superb magical duellists. In fact, not many nations can best them in this regard, if any. It is thanks to their wandless magic, wordless spells,  quickness of reaction and harsh discipline (almost military-like) instilled in them in their school. 

Talking about discipline... Polish School of Magic’s discipline is indeed very strict. The school grounds are usually quiet, students know best not to laugh too loud, not to pull pranks or fool around needlessly. Spontanous duels are forbidden. Teachers love their work and always keep an eye on misbehaving individuals. Lazy, incompetent or misanthopic teachers don’t exist in Polish School of Magic. Instead they can be overly strict, demanding, mocking, conservative and overly eccentric. (This one is based on real life experience, everyone.)

Below: Ksiaz castle

 Teachers in Polish School of Magic lean old and getting a place there is very difficult and demands tons of connections. They also lean male but not just because of prejudice (although, unfortunately, such prejudice exists - Poland is a country of soldiers in many ways), because DADA course there is especially harsh and physically exhausting. (Some say it’s because they want to best Durmstrang and it comes with knowing your enemy).

Despite the notes of traditionalist gender roles, female teachers are usually well-respected, even more than male ones. And that’s why many female teachers are quite haughty and have queen-like demeanor.

Below: Ksiaz castle room

But when do poles rest from all their strict training? The answer: when holidays come. Holidays are sacred for poles and many missteps are forgiven during them, rules become slightly more relaxed. 

One of the curiously LESS regulated things in Polish School of Magic is love. While british and american wizards such as Snape may get into a puritanical rage seeing two students kissing passionately, polish teachers would just smile sweetly at them and leave them alone. Girls sending boys postcards is not considered cringeworthy as it is in Hogwarts (I am looking at you, Harry) but natural and enviable. In fact, teachers encourage students to dance together and on holidays such as Christmas, they even overlook duels related to love triangles (a rare case of them approving non-DADA duels). Poles can dance well and you can often find them waltzing in the school balroom in their festive robes. They also flirt well and all this combined with the fact how good they are at duelling, makes them formidable rivals in love for students from any other school, including Beauxbatons, especially considering that Beauxbatons boys lean narcissistic rather than chivalrous.

In the end, if Poland did participate in Triwizard Tournament, I think it would charm everyone with their quick wit, intelligence, modesty, good manners and passionate spirit. 

Quite far from the “Goblin” stuff, isn’t it?

Below: various beautiful views from Poland

[anotherkindofmindpod]

I’d love for you guys to have Mark Lewisohn on your show just to grill him. As someone who’s experienced workplace bullying and sexual assault, that he would go so far as to paint Klein as “heroic” when he said things like “reluctant virgin” is just so devastating to me. It makes me feel ill. I do NOT want this man to have a say in Beatles history. I love the Beatles. I don’t want that tainted by people who will paint over abuse just to feed their own self importance.

We vehemently agree, Listener!  Thank you for writing in.

Our list of grievances with Mark Lewisohn is long, but in a nutshell we believe his intent is to publicly “redeem” John Lennon and we have seen copious evidence that he will go to whatever lengths he has to in order to do this. 

That includes, but is not limited to: 

Claiming that readers of his Tune In Series may consider Klein the “hero” of the Beatles break-up

Deliberately spreading the demonstrably false lie that John (and Yoko) did not have a significant heroin problem in the late 60s and early 70s (Lewisohn suggests Cold Turkey is just John playing make believe)

Displaying unapologetic favoritism by using glowing terms to portray John and Yoko as the world’s most perfect romance, as opposed to Paul and Linda, whose 29-year marriage he dismisses as “conventional” and motivated by appearances (namely Linda’s pregnancy, even though it was planned) and Green Card needs

Stating that he could tell from watching the infamous “it’s a drag” clip that Paul was kind of sad, but primarily annoyed at how much positive attention John was getting on the day of his murder

Apparently suggesting to an audience of his Power Point Show that Paul maybe stole a leg off Yoko’s bed (the bed she had delivered and built in the Beatles’ recording studio, mind you), a personal “theory” which is based on the fact that Paul later wrote a song called “Three Legs” (you know that song: “My dog, he got three legs, like the bed you inappropriately brought into Abbey Road 2 years ago which I secretly vandalized behind your back because I have nothing better to do, am certainly not busy writing the Beatles Swan Song and don’t have a fucking 7 year old at home or anything”)

This isn’t even to mention Tune In, which could be a whole separate post and episode. Suffice it to say, this book often reads less like a Beatles biography and more like John Lennon Fanfiction to us.

Lewisohn managed to distinguish himself by doing (some) research and unearthing some original documents. That he had some skill in research is not surprising given that he started his career in Beatledom as a researcher for Norman, on his book Shout — which Lewisohn still contends is a good book. Norman, on the other hand has evolved his opinion of his own work and thinks Shout was flawed, so has written a whole biography on Paul to make up for what he sees as the failure of Shout, which is his underestimation of Paul. Unfortunately, Lewisohn does not seem to have made this same journey. He pays lip service to John and Paul being equal, and then spends all of his time and energy trying to prove otherwise. Norman says that he has created a monster in Lewisohn. We take his point.

One of our biggest issues with Lewisohn is that he vigorously promotes himself as an unbiased truth teller, and his calm manner seems to telegraph this. But it is not true. The research that Lewisohn does and the spin that he applies to his findings are all heavily biased. As we mentioned in one of our episodes, he travelled to Gibraltar simply to experience where John and Yoko got married. Yet when Paul calls the May 9th meeting over management the metaphorical cracking of the Liberty Bell, Lewisohn doesn’t even bother to Google it so he can understand the metaphor.

What he chooses to research is also a form of bias. For example, we at AKOM are very interested in Paul’s relationship with Robert Fraser during the Beatle years — since Paul has commented that Fraser was one of the most important, influential people in his life. Paul McCartney was the concept artist behind Sgt. Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band, the Magical Mystery Tour film, the iconic Apple logo, and he co-designed the covers of the White Album and Abbey Road.  All of these are pretty defining moments in the Beatles’ career.  As Beatles fans, we’d like to know more about Paul’s art education and influences. But we would be shocked if Lewisohn dug into Fraser at all beyond his relationship as John and Yoko’s gallerist/curator (and heroin dealer, but since that isn’t a thing in Lewisohn’s world then maybe he will be ignored).

We think Lewisohn benefits massively from the fact that Beatles authorship was like the Wild West since its inception, when everyone with a connection to the Beatles (plus or minus a personal axe to grind) wrote a book about their experience. It was absolute chaos, with no rules, no checks and balances, uncredited sources, etc. Just an absolute shit show.  What Lewisohn did was bring some order to the chaos with some proper documentation. But again, what he chooses to dig into often reflects bias. And this certainly does not mean that he is intellectually or emotionally equipped to interpret his findings. Doing this takes social intelligence and insight, which is a very different skill. As a creator of myths, he is no better (and no more insightful or original) than many of the others who came before him; he worships John Lennon and freely admits it. He is not even close to being unbiased.  But in this dumpster fire of a fandom he has at least checked some boxes and done some digging.  The fact is, the bar has been so low for so long that Beatles fans don’t even know how to expect or want better.  But WE certainly expect better.  We expect some breakthrough, fresh thinking.  Not just Shout with Receipts.

We think it’s significant that Lewisohn was deeply disliked by George Harrison, who lobbied to get him kicked him off the Anthology project. He was fired from Paul’s fan club magazine, and yet no one seems to think he might hold a grudge about that, too?  Lewisohn so distorted John and Paul’s relationship in Tune In that he believes he is the target of the lyrics in Paul’s song “Early Days.“  And he either thinks that’s flattering or funny, because Lewisohn seems to truly believe he knows John Lennon better than Paul McCartney does.  We find it almost tragic that Paul is so bothered by the way his experience and relationship is being portrayed by authors (perhaps Lewisohn) that he wrote a song about it. In it, he conveys his frustration and heartache about how everything is misconstrued and we find it absolutely outrageous that Lewisohn would not take this to heart.  Perhaps Lewisohn thinks Paul should listen to him for a change? And if he doesn’t like it, then tough, because Lewisohn knows better? We think Lewisohn should do some serious soul-searching about “Early Days” because if one of his main subjects is saying, “you are getting it wrong and it is breaking my heart”….maybe, just maybe, he should listen and rethink things.  Maybe apply a little creativity, out-of-the-box thinking and empathy. This is what his heroes did.

Meanwhile, Jean Jackets are SO BUSY complaining that Paul McCartney doesn’t like Lewisohn because he “tells the truth!” that they fail to notice that Lewisohn has become a mouthpiece for Yoko Ono.  He has already started white-washing John Lennon’s history, promoting John and Yoko as the true and only geniuses versus Paul as the craven, small-minded Lennon disciple who (through no virtue of his own) was born with the ability to write some nice tunes.  Lewisohn’s version of John, on the other hand, is ALWAYS a sexy, visionary genius on the right side of every issue.  He even went out of his way to recently trash Paul’s early 70’s albums, which -in addition to being obnoxious and we believe wrong (since we love them)- is totally outside his purview.

Lastly, to address your original point, Lewisohn’s claim that Klein may be viewed as the “hero” of his Beatles History reveals that he hasn’t shown sufficient empathy or interest in Paul’s experience.  This claim at best ignores and at worst condones the fact that Klein was an abusive monster to one of the two founding members of the Beatles.  As we discussed in Episode 4, Klein was a criminal who bullied Paul in his creative workspace, disrespected Paul in his own office in front of his own employees and actively pitted Lennon against McCartney for years.  It’s hard to imagine ANYONE who inflicted more damage on the Beatles and Lennon/McCartney than Allen Klein.  In addition to the wildly inappropriate “reluctant virgin” nickname, he verbally threatened to “own Paul’s ass” (to which Paul responded “he never got anywhere near my ass”). Klein was so disrespectful to Paul and Linda’s marriage he pitched the idea of procuring “a blonde with big tits” to parade in front of Paul to lure him away from Linda and destroy their relationship.  Let’s also never forget that Klein contributed lyrics to the song “How Do You Sleep.”  Allen Klein literally gave Paul nightmares.  Anyone who so much as pretends to care about Paul’s break-up era depression (including his alcohol abuse, his inability to get out of bed and his terrifying sleep paralysis) would not champion Allen Klein.

Yes, Klein is a human being and therefore has his own POV, same as anyone else.  But a Beatles biographer is beholden to four points of view only: John, Paul, George and Ringo.  And when an outsider is openly hostile to one of the Beatles and damaging long-term to all of the Beatles, it is beyond inappropriate to portray him as a hero.  This type of comment, made publicly to an audience of Beatles fans, invalidates and seeks to erase the real trauma inflicted on Paul McCartney by Allen Klein, and we think Lewisohn should apologize for his comments.

Instead, Lewisohn’s current buddy is Peter Brown, whose book, The Love You Make so offended and angered Paul and Linda that they literally burned their copy (and photographed it burning for good measure).  This information doesn’t appear to bother Lewisohn in the least. Why not?

George referred to Norman’s Shout as “Shit.” But Lewisohn thinks it’s a great book.  Why?

How any Beatles or Paul or even George fans tolerate Lewisohn is baffling to us; we don’t recognize a real human being in his version of Paul, and his version of John is a superhero rather than a man.  We suspect that fans have come to accept the traditional story and at least appreciate some properly-documented facts. 

But as we are constantly trying to demonstrate on our show, just because the story has always been told one way, doesn’t mean it’s right.  Because in the end, Mark Lewisohn has no special insight. He wasn’t there. He is a guy who bought into a narrative during the Shout era, and is cherry picking his findings to support it.You can find a discussion of Lewisohn here

[doctorgerth]

Matchup for @kotton-kandy-king

can I have a romantic matchup? Julian, 27, INFP/Libra/Scorpio cusp, pansexual & poly, transman. I'm hella clever and I have a great sense of humor. I'm 5'6" but it's like i'm 6'5" with my attitude, but I'm never rude or disrespectful when it isn't deserved. I'm smart but common sense may be a bit lacking. I love gardening, and I'm highly artistic (painting, going to plays, the opera/ballet). i've dealt with a lot of trauma so a good chunk of my work has been helping kids get through their own trauma. I dye my hair different colors all the time (currently blue) and i love tattoos. I'm like the perfect mix of nerd/jock labels as I love to read just as much as I love to play sports. i'm afro-native and white so my family has a history of practicing voodoo and brujeria, which I continue on, and I'm a hell of a diviner. I also curse people more than i probably should. aesthetic wise, pastel punk fits the best. overall i'm pretty sweet and openminded, though very verbal and opinionated. Preference for male matchup but not opposed to female 😊 

Hey there, sweetheart!! I really hope you enjoy your matches, thanks so much for requesting! 💘

Your match is...

Hawkins (Virgo, INTP)

Appearance wise, you two look very aesthetically pleasing side by side. Your pastel punk compliments his Victorian-esque look, making you two look totally eye-catching and bad-ass when together! He’s very intrigued by your chameleon hair and tattoos, often helping you pick out colors and new tattoo ideas. Appearance is not what matters most of course (I just couldn’t leave that part out!) because Hawkins loves you no matter how you look. He was a tough cookie to crack in regards to romance, but you eased your way into his life as you gained his trust and he slowly broke down his walls for you. Now, he’ll never let you go! You’re the only one who makes him utterly vulnerable, learning him inside and out. Although that’s absolutely terrifying to him, he’s learned to embrace your love above all else. Not to mention the cards have proved to him over and over that you’re here to stay!

You’re clever and can hold your own. Those are all traits he finds important in a partner and he is constantly attracted and impressed by your intelligence. He likes to tease you a bit when your common sense lacks as he finds it oddly amusing considering you’re so smart otherwise. Now, he’s not usually one for jokes, so he’ll usually act exasperated towards your wit and humor, but you always notice those small little smirks of his (no matter how hard he’ll deny it). You’re noticeably more bubbly and outgoing than he is and that’s what makes you two so fitting oddly enough. It’s obvious that he’s totally soft for you when it comes down to it! He’s super serious and this is beneficial in your relationship when it comes to expressing his love for you and even during arguments. Because Hawkins is so deliberate with everything he does, this leaves no room for questioning his feelings for you. He might not always be the best at being physically or verbally affectionate and romantic, but it’s in the way he cares for you, supports you, and protects you with his life that shows his devotion. He’s not like this with anyone else, only you!

You two are both quite opinionated so this can make your relationship rocky at points. However, Hawkins hates pointless conflict and you’re open minded enough that you two can easily overcome any obstacle. He takes your arguments and feelings seriously so you at least feel understood during your arguments, even if Hawkins doesn’t always agree with you. Your love for the arts and gardening helps to inspire his own artistic side, especially in regards to interior design. He loves your paintings and will definitely decorate the Grudge Dolph and whatever home you share with them. He supports and even aids in your gardening and most of your dates consist of observing the arts. Hawkins is decent at painting and he wouldn’t mind taking a few lessons from you. Peaceful bonding times like that are among his favorite ways to spend time with you. 

We don’t really know Hawkins’ past but considering this is One Piece we’re talking about, I’m sure his backstory is tragic as well. Being two broken people who have risen up to make names for themselves, you and Hawkins have a deep respect for one another. He doesn’t care much for little ones, but it makes you happy so he will support you no matter what. You’re mentally strong and compassionate and he admires that about you. What truly strikes his interest about you is your divination. Not many people share this ability and interest with him, so this was one of the forces that drove his attraction for you. He’s very intrigued about brujeria and loves to learn from you. He’s equally skilled in voodooism and easily supports your cursing of others lmao 

Other potential suitors:

Law (Libra, ISTJ) - Law loves your attitude, wit, and how opinionated you are. He’s insanely attracted to strong people who challenge him. And you do just that no matter how much shorter you are than him, which he will tease you about just to rile you up! He’s also very attracted to the hair and tattoos obviously and you two frequently get tattoos together (if he ever decides to get more - hello sleeve Law). But more importantly, Law enjoys being with you in general. You two share very intelligent conversations and love to wind down in the same ways; reading a good book curled up beside each other. You’ve got enough spunk in you to keep things interesting, but you’re also kind and easy to get along with. And he thinks your witchcraft is badass. Will definitely request people for you to put a curse on. 

Lucci (Gemini, ISTJ) - Believe it or not, Lucci is a classy man with a deep appreciation for the arts as well. He loves going to operas or art galleries with you and he is actually quite skilled at painting! It’s one of his favorite ways to relax, so doing it with you makes it ten times better. He also enjoys to read so it goes to show you two know how to spend relaxing time together. This is obviously a nice change to Lucci’s otherwise dark and troublesome lifestyle. Much like Law, he loves your attitude and will tease you to your wit’s end just to get some reactions out of you. Is very intrigued by your divination and wouldn’t mind learning a thing or two plz don’t teach him, he’s dangerous enough lmao. 

Usopp (Aries, ENFP) - Another artsy boy, Usopp loves to paint with you and he’s also very skilled at gardening! Tending to your shared garden is one of his favorite ways to spend time with you. He thinks it’s very admirable of you, the way you’ve overcome your past traumas in order to help kids overcome their own. It’s your kind and compassionate nature that has him falling for you every single day. He’s not much of a reader so you two have lots of fun together playing sports and any other active games. The witchcraft kind of freaks him out but if it’s part of your heritage then he won’t ever ask you to not do so, just don’t try to scare him with it! 

[prism-sakura-s]

Animal Skins AU

Finally have the courage to make my own au and release it into the world so here it is: an animal brides au inspired by overly sarcastic production’s latest video and cosmo sheldrake’s “the moss”

(Warning: murder/hunting mention, death mention, gun mention, lmk if there’s anymore)

Setting: a mythical world similar to ours, but quite different because I didn’t want to worry about where specific animals lived. so basically the only differences is where all the animals live

Characters

Logan Tala

species: human

sexuality: aromantic asexual

gender: male

raised in an orphanage run by nuns

graduate of The Saint Teresa College, also run by the nuns he grew up with

having been brought up in a catholic school with a mostly conservative staff, it wasn’t until he met Sister Tanya, a closeted lesbian asexual nun, that he started to accept his sexuality.

loves nature and space, but is strangely indifferent to robots, stating that “The truly compelling kind of science, is the kind that was not created by mankind, and therefore can never truly be understood.”

he’s poetic like that

while very intelligent and appreciative of the goals and services the educational system provides, he also (rather surreptitiously) absolutely hates it due to its outdated method of shoving information down students’ throats without giving any real thought or care to keep the pupils interested. not to mention the fact that homework and projects can keep a student up late at various hours, thus throwing off their circadian system and not letting them get the required time for sleep

is the kind to scroll wikipedia for hours

Patton Uycoco

species: human

sexuality: bisexual

gender: demiboy

went to the same school as Logan, and is his closest friend

also struggled with their sexuality as well as their gender, not really experiencing dysphoria but feeling like something was off

was introduced to Sr. Tanya by Logan, who helped them come to terms with their orientations

loved animals, but mostly just mammals, birds, and cute fishes. anything creepy-looking or said to be dangerous (snakes, spiders, nautilus, sharks, octopuses are a bit in-between, etc.) were squicks for them

cartoon and musical lover!

loved Dodie (yes she exists in this au because I can and also she’s basically a goddess and deserves to be in every universe) as well as some other mainstream artists (still loves 1D, cried when they broke up)

Roman Sanders

species: therianthropic (deer)

sexuality: gay af

gender: male

brother of Remus Sanders

ADHD

half therianthropic, half human. his mother was therianthropic, a deer capable of turning into a human. she fell in love with roman’s father and married him, giving birth to Roman and Remus shortly after. however, only Roman inherited her (technically) shape-shifting powers

his mother was killed by a hunter when he was 15

was homeschooled by both his parents along with his brother, but after his mother died was educated by his father only

not incredibly fond that his “spectacular skill” consists of turning into a deer. often wishes he could be something more “brave and dangerous”, like a lion or bear. has even occasionally said he’d settle on a horse, because “at least those beautiful creatures can knock a b*tch out”

not that he disrespects his mother, of course

Roman really misses her

loves his brother, but is also incredibly creeped out by him so he never admits it

loud

loves (hyperfixates on) musicals, the occasional video game, cartoons, mythology, greek and latin history and architecture, and literature

met Logan at a history convention, swapped numbers and eventually became close friends. was introduced to Patton shortly after and bonded over their shared love of cartoons and musicals

Virgil Noctis

species: therianthropic (leopard cat)

sexuality: panromantic, asexual

gender: genderfluid

hard of hearing due to a gunshot they heard when they were very young

ran away in a panic and ended up at a small cottage owned by a sweet farmer lesbian couple

was adopted by the lesbians and grew up under their care

attended Greenfield for grade school and high school, but never attended college as they didn’t have enough money to afford it

very very anxious, especially about their disability

(they can’t hear people, though they can read lips well, what if they react wrong? they can’t even hunt properly, what if they get eaten in the wild?)

they can, in fact, communicate and hunt well :)

often uses their phone to communicate with others

was very nervous when they came out to their moms about being genderfluid, and while their parents were confused at first, they eventually learned to understand and accept their child’s gender orientation

needs to have headphones or loud speakers in order to listen to music

likes emo music (mcr, tøp, p!atd etc. because those exist here too yay) as well as dodie, tessa violet, orla gartland and lauren aquilina

(plus billie eilish of course)

very interested in conspiracies

met Roman while hanging out in the woods

(they saw him turn into a human and freaked out before remembering that it was a thing some people did sometimes and oh yeah they are one of those people)

Remus Sanders

species: human

sexuality: aro-spec, a-spec (questioning)

gender: trans male

twin brother of Roman Sanders

actually a bit jealous of Roman for getting all the cool powers, but still loves him nonetheless

also loves annoying his baby brother to death

(yes, baby brother, albeit by an hour)

also misses his mother a lot, though he’ll admit he was closer to his father

dysphoric, always tries his best to feel like a guy though he hates polo shirts or... anything with a folded collar

loves creepy/scary animals, movies, games etc.

watches conspiracy videos on the daily like Virgil, but likes to focus more on paranormal activities

speaking of Virgil, when they first met he did creep them out a bit, but discovered they both watched conspiracy videos and bonded from there

met the others through Roman

Dante

species: therianthropic (timber rattlesnake)

sexuality: queer

gender: agender

human contact whats that

yeah so basically they only learned how to speak from the passing hunters and hikers in the forest as well as the other therianthropic animals

sometimes they would obtain and collect books (doesn’t matter where from and how, not important) and eventually taught themselves how to read

kinda sick of being the kind of animal that humans screamed at and ran away from upon seeing them

and if it wasn’t that, it would normally involve being captured

he always escapes of course

the first time they were handled by a human without malicious intent was by a 16-year old Remus, who tripped over them while on a leisurely stroll to find some tarantulas

Remus brought them home and housed them kindly

he was the first person Dante revealed his human self to

long story short Dante moved in with the Sanders family and perfected their English during their stay there

also Roman screamed like a little girl upon seeing Dante for the first time

he denies it’s ever happened

Remy Diaz-Picani

species: human

sexuality: gay

gender: deminonbinary

a nature photographer

married to Emile

Emile Diaz-Picani

species: human

sexuality: gay, aceflux

gender: male

a zoologist, works in tandem with Remy

married to Remy

Anyways, that’s all I got for now, I might add some stuff later on. Also if I made any mistakes regarding Virgil’s disability or the like, please let me know, this would be my first attempt at writing disabilities in a (hopefully) pretty big project like this.

[vantablade]

016.

on nocturne’s speech patterns, I wanted to make a point in that her manner of speech can be quite unpredictable. Raised by a High King, who remains incredibly and thoroughly praised for her constant and unyielding elegance and eloquence in equal measure (despite her private cruelties), Nocturne was at first exposed to language that was proper, structured and, due to the musical and artistic inclinations of her family, also affected by a flowery quality. Although not exceptionally literate (in fact, her literacy is rather poor, and has only improved due to years of arduous study) she is well-spoken and well-versed in language, especially as to the fact she can adapt and learn language very easilyーeven if said language is not her native tongueーand so, when she speaks, one can assume she received a rather high quality education, and presume her to be exceptionally literate and boasting a high intelligence.

However, likewise, although she can talk, and talk often, especially upon first meetingsーif we are to understand her through astrological purposes, which are not canonically effective due to the fact their astrological practises are entirely different, comprised of different planets and connotations, then we should consider the fact that Mercury is in her first house, which can give natives with this placement an immediate talkative air, although the nature of their talks are altered depending on the sign which Mercury calls home (in this case, Scorpio)ーshe is also of a rather stoic and private personality. She does not deign to overshare unless it’s observational or reflective of her own philosophical thought, and rarely does she actually reveal the nature of her emotions or herself unless she is in a mode of comfort to allow herself. In fact, it is this ability to be talkative that allows her some degree of privacy; people assume they know much of her character when she has in fact revealed very little. 

The intimacy she shares with her conversational partner also impacts her manner of speech, as does her experiences since her childhood, and she becomes increasingly more laconic and taciturn with growing friendships, which can be misconstrued as a growing distance between them. Rather, actually, this is a sign of closeness; she dislikes silence, so if she is accepting of it between her and a partner, then this is a sign of trust. But it is also a sign of fondness that she is so open to sit and consider another’s thoughts and speech, without feeling the need to contribute in any vocal way, because she is happy to simply bask in another’s tale. 

Also, a juxtaposition is crucial in her character; while she is perfectly capable of being florid, extensive and intellectual in her speech, which most assume to be associated with some innate understanding of social norms and politeness (at the very least), Nocturne is prone to rudeness. Her instinct is to be direct and tactless, with very little concern for the social appropriateness of her comment. She neglects to refer to others as their titles, especially if they are considered ❛Superior❜, because to her that has little impact on her perception of them. To her, respect must be earned interpersonally, rather than just assuming that they are owed it based on others’ judgements. For example, she consistently refers to her High Commander purely by their surname, which is perceived as incredibly disrespectful by some people, especially Doctor Pandora Anach’k, who finds Nocturne to be impetuous and entitled. Which, while a little harsh, isn’t all too far from the truthーas dehumanised as Nocturne was, she was also raised with an immense ego, a head filled with religious epithets and fates, and thus some degree of self-importance exists within her even despite the paradox of her immense lack of self-worth. A true-blue ❛inferiority-superiority❜ complex, one that she is not entirely aware of.

However, it should be noticed that she doesn’t always intend to be unkind or rude; as is the way with people who are autistic, Nocturne truly doesn’t understand social conventions, although she is slowly being acquainted with them over time. She really doesn’t always understand the nature of her speech is inappropriate for the context, or could lack sense and compassion for the other person. Sometimes, yes, she is being deliberately rebelliousーsometimes unnecessarily soーor rude, but sometimes she is simply speaking as she thinks. It doesn’t help that with a Mars ruled Mercuryーbeing Scorpio, as I mentioned, as well as possessing other placements in Scorpioーshe has a nature that is quite argumentative, overly passionate or intense in some way, and Scorpio is a sign of extremes. 

Speaking of extremes, my last point is, as I mentioned in the previous paragraph, Nocturne is becoming acquainted with social norms and polite manners of speech; this is largely influenced by Orun Li, one of her closest companions and another autistic person in her life, who was afforded a much kinder childhood and a much more natural way of acquainting himself with societal norms and expectations. As such, she receives his guidance much more kindly than she would others, although she also accepts guidance from Amandine (though not initially), and some other respected individuals. As such, she has ❛scripts❜ that she relates to others, which are in order to upkeep a respectable (due to the fact she does act as a Representative of Atlas, especially one of significant rank) demeanour and a diplomatic relationship with most she encounters. However, her politeness can seem stiffーshe is relating it based on stock phrases she has been told about, and lacks the nuance to acutely augment her speech depending on the situation. Sometimes, there will be significant pause between her statements (as she often speaks in absolutes, with little doubt) as she recognises afterwards that she has forgotten some sort of crucial politeness. 

She often must ❛remember her manners❜ which is a phrase I admittedly use a lot in her narrative, because she literally does have to remember her mannersー politeness is not her immediate priority. But she is not so prideful to assume that nobody deserves it. As she matures, she becomes much more naturally kind in her speech, and her true compassionate nature is revealed easier. But don’t be surprised if she is equal parts blunt and overly polite, florid and poetic and then laconic and simple; her speech is easily influenced by her company, but also is an amalgamation of several different ways of teaching. She is equal parts a fantastic speaker, and also incredibly awkward; polite, yet rude; humble and yet prideful. She is a woman of paradoxes, as are all people. 

[clairehazelb]

A NOTE FROM THE EDITOR OF THE TENTH CUBE

And by Editor I mean, Claire Hazel,

(whom you may know as C.M. Hazel)

Writing my first historical fiction novel was a task of love, but a great endeavor nonetheless.

When we do things we love. we love the things we do. The Tenth Cube was, in essence, my love for romance and history poured onto pages of combined plotlines and historical facts. Coupled with science and a good dose of ritz, it blossomed like a garden flower into the novel it became. I felt, finally, like a writer the moment I wrote “The End.”

Writers, like professionals of other art forms, just are. Mostly, it occurred to me long ago,  we can become it, like the second you write the last sentence of that novel, or publish your book, like there is a glorified ending to calling yourself a member of the elite group of artists who pine at the sight of a lonely blank page.

Or so I felt. 

I read years ago -and my apologies to the person who wrote it for I sincerely do not recall the author- that ‘the moment you call yourself what you esteem yourself to be, is the moment you become it’. Therefore, if you want to be a writer, you call yourself a writer and let others deliberate on whether you are apt to be or not.

I practiced my skill of saying I was a writer in front of a mirror or while waiting for traffic to move in the lane ahead of mine. I yelled it out the window for good measure. “Move the fuck out of the way. I am a writer and can write this into my book!”

The moment somebody asked me and I said it out loud, I embodied it with pride, like the day I stepped with character shoes onto a stage felt for the actress in me. It burgeoned out of me like it was supposed to forever, waiting to be discovered. I beamed with the wine-laced fever of the evening.

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  It was a pivotal moment in my history, redefining where I ended up with my work. I went on a search for myself and found my writing voice. The days were growing longer with the dawn of my ideas and entries, so I had to make use of what I was inspired to do.

Despite my assertion, that I was a writer and not a poser, fear of criticism stalled me. I faced it like stage fright, but it was a sinister face at the end of my journal telling me it was not good enough. Nothing could come out of my penned notes and rhythmic pentameters.

I read about imposter syndrome around the time, looking for ways to face my fears. As it turns out, it can apply to anyone in any career, but it is a disorder that affects writers especially so, the idea that you aren’t good enough is prevalent amongst the inked-fingered-wordsmiths in my profession.

When I finished the Tenth Cube, everything changed.  While editing, I thought about a piece I had never published which explored the elements of fear. From that entry into my journal, came the text I eventually entered into my novel. I felt it appropriate for my second published book and first historical fiction novel. Aspiring writers are usually the best readers and learn best while to reading other writers’ works, taking what they can to heart. Here is part of the text in my book.

  A WRITING INDULGENCE

When I first started writing The Cube (as I lovingly call this novel), I typed without direction and wrote about many topics. I posted most of it on an old website, I would not even dare call a blog at this point. I eventually learned to hold hands with my muse in a better way and supplied my artistic knowledge with my other artistic experience. But, it inevitably always led me toward the same reason for not embarking onto a manuscript fully. Fear.

  My head swam with thoughts and reasons why I would fail miserably at my task. I just knew.

I know everything in stories has already been said and done.

I know I’m not alone when it comes to storytelling and interesting facts about life and circumstance. I know the very principle of storytelling relies on the fact that the narrative is good and characters are interesting. And, then again, I don’t know anything at all.

I personally see the story better in my head than how it reflects on writing.

  Despite knowing and fear, stories ultimately lead you where you need to go. And for sake of argument,

Yes, I believe it’s possible to be a good storyteller, despite everything having been done already.

Rarely am I ever afraid, even rarest is my admission to the fear, but it scares me a little still because nothing has ever worked in my mind better than my stories.

I’ve failed so miserably at so many things it’s hard to start this again. I do not fear telling you this though. I write for a while and the fear disappears. I want to be the bearer of good news for new writers or those having an urge to quit like I have so many times before. Bear with me on this.

The phrase ‘It started with a notebook I once wrote’ jumped into my head a while ago. I wrote a poem about it because of the many notebooks later it took me to create the first personal entry into a public medium. I’d written about theater plays and Language Education with a technical point of view, but storytelling, like acting in stories which came to life through my fingers, became the part of me I most enjoyed writing.

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About eight years ago, I wrote a story –also based on a weird dream- and I went from there. I haven’t really stopped writing since. So, maybe that’s my beginning for this. I’ve scattered ideas and unfinished stories everywhere. My own pending as ever, the satire runneth over my brimming mind, for lack of better understanding sets perfectly in here. But, to make things simple, I will advise you to keep trying new and trying for more.

“Delia became my headstrong voice for writing. Though it was my second novel finished, she paced my thoughts in a way no other story had, and I was hooked to her charms. Delia Donovan became my daily dose of the [her-story] I so hated as a young girl and delight so in my adult years. Instead of writing columns of advice for women as I had planned, I went toward writing about strong, intelligent, resourceful, frightened yet capable women with the same principle in mind.” Claire Hazel

Delia will hopefully continue to inspire stories – I am in research and writing the second novel. There will likely be a third as well.

Aspiring writer and authors, the gist of what I mean in this.

It took me X years to develop the voice I needed to write this book.

It took me lll to research and write the full novel, with periods of off and on to dream and work on other projects.

It has taken me lV between trying to publish on my own and finding a publisher.

  The Tenth Cube became an enduring project because it has a life worth living, I have said that before I think. Most writers live in this world where stories cannot go untold. Therefore my dear thirtysomething-writer who hasn’t started yet, if you are like I was, find the outlet to do so and share the story that has a life worth living.

Take the time to write and sit with confidence to edit. And please, share with me that hard-pressed jewel when you like.

A big box with recycled paper packing and a mug of coffee with enough supply for reading will be the most delicious treat a grown girl could ever get.

  What are then, these so-called Elements

By ways of telling you of the best technique I have used to move my stories and find the hidden information in my characters I need to shape their persona, we will use the What if? technique. What ifs are a way to create possibility. When you have doubts, there are endless What ifs going around in your head like a merry-go-round of incertitude. In essence, The Elements of said turntable of fear could be considered the following:

What if I can’t write like the rest of the authors I read?

This could fall within the impostor syndrome I wrote about before. You are not an impostor of your own game, you feel like a writer, believe it with confidence. It does not mean you have to be like other writers, successful or not.

Writing may or may not take time. For the present me, it is a matter of sitting to the type or jot down notes. But as I mentioned, it took many years to develop a voice I found pleasing and suitable, according to my desired writing style. I guess what is important is that

you don’t imitate but emulate those you love AT FIRST to develop your own voice

write about what you like and not what people like, the audience will find you and relate better

study the greats and accommodate your needs through your learning styles and experiences

nobody is alike and we are all connected, so find what works for your personal style without judging yourself or thinking you will be compared

What if there are things I don’t know or need to include in my novel I know absolutely nothing about?

Researching novels doesn’t have to be grueling work. Annote as you write (for pantsers) or outline the novel as you want it to be (plotter). Your writing style can help or hinder you. So, read carefully,

Research as needed before and fully after finishing your manuscript

Too much research can create difficulty for you and/or your reader, who is probably not in need to sit through, say, a history class instead of understanding through the plot movement

Too little research shows lack of pulchritude and disrespect to your readers, or make you sound nonchalant and ignorant.

Rule of thumb? Be aware, show knowledge, but don’t over inform.

What if I get stuck in my writing process?

Find inspiration wherever you look or take time to be still and OBSERVE

Nature, life, family, etc, show us and teach us. Use its lessons to show you the way, so do not just look and see, WATCH AND LEARN

Don’t overwhelm yourself or stick to a plotline if you feel stuck. Take a break to refresh your ideas and they will hit you when you least expect it, I promise you! An exercise that works for me is jumping the part where I am stuck and either mind mapping or planning the ending first then backtracking to the difficult area

Talk to your characters. they tell you lies at times but help you find the way. Listen carefully!

What if they do not help me publish?

Many writers are still sitting on the sideline of genius, gems of witing prose at their fingertips. Sadly, most give up writing because of this. I have quarried and continue to quarry publishers without much success, but I keep pressing on.

I self-published my first two books with great difficulty and many years of work, but they paid off in a way nothing else has. Take your chances with self-publishing. (I will soon open a platform for other writers to send me manuscripts to publish as an editor. News on this later!)

What if I don’t have time to write?

Write where ever you are able to create a strong writing muscle. Keep pen and pads where ever you can or use phones and tablets, recording apps, and /or your digital cameras

Take every chance you get to exercise the need to write, be it a post-it note or a short phrase inside a journal, a Tweet or a love note, make those words count in your favor

What if I do not feel like I can write my novel (yet)?

Use blogs, submit to magazines, write articles or content, keep journals, or write your family’s newsletter.

Contact your local papers or ask if anybody needs a content writer in your school or local businesses

Start with simpler texts, like magazine entries and restaurant menus

Keep writing your way into the published author you want to be without thinking that you have to have a published book in your hands before you can call your self a writer. There are hundreds of professions where writing is a need and many forms of writing are included in this. Comic book writers, for exa

  Comic book writers, for example, are storytellers, too. It is a matter of how you see your writing come to life to show others your stories. Find where your style fits best and show your best work.

My final writing indulgence was to tell other writers that there are ways, time, and chances to do what you love and ways to do it. The biggest problem most people face is fear, but fear can come with a face, a price tag, a backseat without a window, or an empty stomach and children on your hip.

We may fear different things which hinder our jump into the life we want. Discovering the fear we face is the first step toward the freedom from it. The next is up to you.

  With love,

Claire.

Lovely writer and content creator, take a moment to create your own purpose, and formulate a plan to write your way into the content you like to read. Start by creating your own space and sharing with others the gift of your writing wisdom, comedic genius, romantic side, laughing tales of your youth, or the recipes and secrets your grandmother gave you to keep.

You will get a cool credit for those plugins that make your place shine and sparkle.

It is easy and fast to start. Tell me about it on your way back to my content and happy writing!

Disclaimer: Credit and site themes powered by WordPress

Before the Tenth Cube. I typed without direction and wrote about many topics. With time and practice, I learned to hold hands with my muse, but fear held me back. Learn how to understand it and push past it. A NOTE FROM THE EDITOR OF THE TENTH CUBE And by Editor I mean, Claire Hazel,

[bakudei]

Long post warning again heh e

you know what I'm tired of?

People saying Deidara is stupid and/or portaying him as such in fanfics, rps, etc

It's so annoying to see him reduced to this "dumb blond" who talks too much and only cares about exploding things

He's so much more than that

First of all, the wiki clearly says that he's intelligent you hecks

Another thing not mentioned in detail here is the whole concept of C4. Nobody really gives Deidara credit for how brilliant that was. He literally created bombs that were small enough to enter the bloodstream and cause total disintegration at a cellular level. That to me is amazing and incredibly ingenious.

Deidara was just a kid compared to the other Akatsuki members; he only managed to reach the age of 19 before he blew himself up in protest of Sasuke's plot armor. In spite of that, he was so valuable to the organization that Pein actually ordered the other members to mourn for him when he died. If he had just been an explosion-loving idiot, that wouldn't have been the case.

"Yeah," you might say, "but he still talked a lot, that can't be denied. Even Tobi pointed it out."

Deidara was someone who was passionate about his ideals and like any passionate person, he loved to talk about them. His art brought him a lot of joy and it was honestly precious to see him get excited when he talked about it. However, maybe my memory is rusty since I haven't seen Shippuden in awhile, but I don't remember him as being someone who spoke excessively otherwise. He himself believed it was 'artistic' to be cool and not waste time with talking too much, although he was accused by Tobi of talking too much while he tried to explain that to him.

This last point is a bit tricky, because it's a fact that Deidara was very dedicated to his art. It's my belief though that he was capable of putting aside some of that dedication at times. In a conversation with Sasori, who constantly disagreed with him about the nature of true art, he told Sasori he respected his opinion as a fellow artist even if he couldn't go along with it. His respect of Sasori in general despite their differences shows that he could ignore, to some extent, his devotion to his art in favor of respecting others even if they didn't agree with him. Tobi constantly disrespected him and his art and provoked him, but in spite of that he always warned Tobi during battle before making an attack that would have put him in danger and tried to work well together with him. He even apologized to him before his final explosion (which is honestly a whole other post because I have a lot to say about that too). If he had truly been someone with mindless dedication to his art, he would have never shown respect to Sasori and wouldn't have cared less what happened to Tobi because neither of them had respected his art.

Anyways, if you read all that you're wonderful and I hope it made sense since I literally just woke up-

It's just something that has been irking me for awhile now, idk, maybe I haven't been reading the good fics but it's something I've seen many times and it needs to stop

Deidara is a wonderfully complex character and doesn't deserve this disrespect

[royalbangtanclan]

I have been waiting for an article like this. What a relief it was to read it. As much as I appreciate the hype and attention the group is getting in whatever capacity so that their dreams are achieved, watching interviews where interviewers clearly have not researched the group is honestly painful and disrespectful. They undermine the intelligence and artistry of the group and their fanbase. They ask them the usual fan fodder questions: unflattering and intrusive questions about their fans, their love/sex life -- the typical things one would ask a manufactured boyband as if the boys have no creative licence or insightful explorations to offer. It makes me cringe.

As attractive as the group is, that is not what brought me and many others here. During my very first watch of 'Idol', despite the flashy visuals, I initially read the lyrics. I was so intrigued; it did not read like a typical pop song at all. A rudimentary Google search led me to discover just how much of their own work they write and produce. My heart was actually pounding when I read over lyrics before hearing the songs as if they were poetry; and it really is poetry. I then found the song that accompanied the words, listened, and read again. What was being said in the songs genuinely resonated with me. Bapsae and First Love were especially powerful for me to read and hear on a personal level. It was a little frightening and almost cathartic to read some of my innermost submerged thoughts brought to the surface by someone else like that. The beautiful visuals and attention to detail were an added bonus.

When I got my first copy of their Love Yourself: Answer album I immediately flipped to the credits. I have been studying music and pop culture for decades now and I am still astounded by the level of work and thought they personally put into the creation of their music. The writing, the performing, the recording, the actual composition of original music. It is seldom done so authentically, especially for a group with their level of stardom power. And most impressive of all, they have always done it this way, even when they were just starting out. They were authentic artists from scratch; it's what got RM through the doors of BitHit in the first place. He was composing music by the time he was 14. That's especially rare in this day and age that they would hold out in the name of authenticity. Compounded with their good looks, it would have been so easy for them to simply let someone else speak for them, take the money and fame and run. But that's not what this group is about. They held out and worked tirelessly to tell their own stories in the name of honesty and integrity.

So many of the groups and singers I adore from the 50's, 60's, 70's -- even in writing and creating their own music, a significant portion of them did not attempt or thoroughly delve into the art of self-production. It's so rare. These Korean musicians are artists who are writing about things unique to our generation; things people don't want to publicly talk about, things that desperately need to be said that aren't being said by other artists. It embarrasses me when all of their hard work and efforts are reduced to their physical appearance or popularity.

As she mentions in the article, this is not an unheard of theme. It is something that frequently happens in art predominantly consumed by women; look at how our society perceives fan fiction, or romantic comedies and novels; look at how demonized Disco was as it lent power and a voice to female and lgbt artists and audiences. There is a tendency to attempt to discredit art and artists who create work that just so happens to speak and give power to a largely female audience and that isn't a coincidence.

This writer completely encapsulates the artistic direction, political standpoints, and socio-cultural relevance of what BTS are doing without discrediting their artistic integrity on the basis of their visuals, appeal to women, or fluency in English. Like many artists before them who wield such power over their audience, their message threatens the norm and status quo by encouraging others to think individually, have self respect, self discovery, self love. That we need not conform to predetermined expectations and guidelines and instead find our own path. That is a powerful truth to offer the world. It is disappointing that many individuals writing on them in the media are missing that due to lack of research or a lack of effort to overcome the language barrier as well as boyband stereotypes and misconceptions. It is such a profoundly sad missed opportunity.

They did it to Little Richard in the 1950's: They publicly insulted and shamed him, questioning his credibility and worth as both a man and an artist who composed some of the most iconic rock songs in music due to the fact that he wore makeup and embraced aspects of femininity. Sound familiar?

They did it to The Beatles in the early sixties; the press hardly talked about them as viable, serious musicians until they made the decision to step back from touring in 1966 and exclusively dedicate their time and focus to studio work. If you look at interviews with the Beatles during the height of Beatlemania you will see a pattern; that same embarrassing line of questioning that focuses entirely on their physical appearances, "crazy" fanbase, attention from women, love lives -- with so little interest and research done about their work and original compositions. Again, sound familiar?

During the height of Queen in the seventies the incredible, ground-breaking work they were bringing to the world stage was often left to the wayside in interviews with interviewers asking rude and pervasive questions about the nature of Freddie Mercury's sex life. Again, sound familiar?

When artists challenge the status quo publicly, those who wish to maintain it (the silver spoons) seek out ways to discredit the artistic integrity of those who do in an effort to dampen their credibility; because if you paint a person with power in an unflattering light, you may convince others that what they have to say doesn't matter.

Mark my words; as the members of BTS get older their production levels and creative licence will inevitably mature and grow with them. BTS has what a lot of other famous artists in their position do not have: experience in the field of composition and production. Even if many individuals are not ready to take them seriously as artists now, believe me when I say that as long as BTS stick to their guns and continue to push boundaries and create authentically, there will eventually be no other choice but to hear them out and acknowledge them for their artistic integrity and socio-political influence.

I know I just wrote a novel here, but I hope that everyone understands how rare and important BTS are as artists; that what is being done to them has also been done to some of the most well-respected and revered artists of our time. I'm not comparing their work, I'm comparing their experiences based on levels of fame. Not many people achieve the level of fame that BTS has, but there is a history of invalidation aimed at artists who do reach it, especially those who write the hard conversations into their music and maintain artistic integrity.

With that said, what BTS is doing right now has also never been done before. I know the ARMY has been there for them long before they were famous and I also know that they will be there for them as they continue to grow and mature as people and artists. Don't let yourself get discouraged by the attitudes of those who are not yet ready to accept them as viable musicians and artists; they have the advantage of speaking for themselves. Those who seek to discredit them will end up on the wrong side of history as they always do, and BTS has already broken enough ground and set records that will secure them on the right side of it.

[paperclipninja]

Younger post-ep ramble 5x07 part 1

Ok, so the feelings about Younger 5x07 are real, my feelings are real (see what I did there 😉) and they are many. I have watched the ep many times because there is SO much happening in it and I’ve discovered new gems each viewing. I’ve decided to split my ramble into 2 posts, this one is going to be the episode overall with a bit of a superficial reference to Charles and Liza perhaps, but I’m going to dedicate a separate post to them and their interactions throughout the episode because this one is going to get out of control otherwise!

Words are below the read more and there’s a good chance it’s going to be many words long with intermittent flailing thrown in for good measure. Proceed at own risk.  

I’m always cautiously optimistic going into an episode that has been as hyped as ‘A Christmas Miracle’. Anticipation was high, hopes were high and this ep certainly did deliver, in many many ways. And yes, OBVIOUSLY the Team Charles shipper in me has thought about how the pairing might eventuate and I will most definitely be talking about all things Charles and Liza in post 2/2, but there were also some of the best one liners and moments of the entire series in this ep and it is quite seriously like a Christmas stocking stuffed to the brim with delightful treats!

So first things first, let’s get this whole Maggie/Penelope/Luca thing on the table. WHAT THE WHAT??? I mean, Penelope and Luca most certainly struck me as fishy last ep, but the golden handcuffs and sort-of-flirtatious-but-not-quite-oh-look-now-I-own-you vibe was making me wonder if the movie being referenced in this holiday delight was less Bridget Jones’ Diary and more Silence of the Lambs meets Eyes Wide Shut. So flipping weird. And it actually made me a bit sad for Maggie for two reasons: 1) all of that work Maggie has done is now locked away in storage and that must hurt and 2) while her calling out the weirdness and walking out of the party was A+ excellent, I feel like Maggie would be a very good judge of character and the fact she didn’t pick up on their bizzaro manner and general existence and at least comment on it seemed a little out of character to me. In saying that though, I totally get that as an artist, a big fat pay-cheque is rare and the thought of people buying and displaying all your work would be overwhelmingly flattering. I hope Maggie gets another big exhibition this season with success in the form of slightly less creepy buyers.

I’m going to jump to Kelsey now and her whole situation. Oh Kelsey, you’re in a bit of a pickle now, aren’t you? We all knew that the double dipping was going to end badly and I certainly don’t think we’ve seen it all play out yet, but there was a little part of me that quite enjoyed her torment over how she would manage being at the party with both Zane and Jake. We’ve seen Jake’s true colours in this ep and I gotta say, they ain’t pretty. I was also a bit conflicted about Zane, despite feeling sorry for him and the way he got bumped from the book. Now I said it last week, I’m warming up to Zane more and more and I genuinely felt bad for him, but the comment he made to Kelsey that he should’ve ‘stopped this the second I saw it’ did not sit well with me. Dude, stopped what? The book? Kelsey working on it? Or Kelsey’s free choice about who she sleeps with?

I definitely don’t think it’s wise for Kelsey to be sleeping with an author as she’s trying to get a book finished, but would Zane care what she was doing if he wasn’t also into her? Probs not I’m guessing. I can see that there may be other interpretations of that line, but that’s how I took it and coupled with Jake’s possessive move to get Zane off the book and lock Kelsey in a basement all for himself I feel like these guys, who in one breath hail Kelsey’s intelligence and strength, are also thinking they have some kind of claim over her. I’ll give Zane a chance to redeem himself and put his comment down to the pain of losing the only book he has going at the moment, but Jake is officially bad news IMO. Watch this space, but I sense DRAH-MAH on the horizon.

Two words: Diana Trout. That woman is an icon and some of her lines in this ep were some of the best of the series, hands down. And so were her scenes. The Enzo/Christmas tree situation was heartburstingly adorable. What I love most about this blossoming relationship is that neither Diana or Enzo try to change the other, they really do like the other just as they are (Bridget Jones reference intended). It would have been so easy for the writers to have Diana feel uneasy about Enzo and keep him separated from her public life or for her to feel embarrassed or try to change him, but these two are so absurdly different yet it works and it’s just a joy to watch. I read a couple of comments saying that we’re seeing Diana soften but I actually think that it’s not that, it’s that she’s willing to show her softer side to Enzo. I know that distinction may sound tenuous, but I feel like Diana has always had that side to her but she only reveals it once she feels comfortable with people (which we’ve seen as the series has progressed and her relationship with Liza has developed). I also realised I’ve never seen Diana laugh, heartily laugh, like she did after the champagne cork popped and I have to wonder if that was a break in character that they kept in or if it’s the lighter side of Diana we’re getting insight into? 

And of course the gift exchange with Liza, ugh, I actually cried. It was so incredibly moving, the mutual respect and admiration was emanating from my screen. Not to mention the line that should win an award: ‘Neckwear should inspire envy Liza, not seizures’. I’m dead set laughing as I type it. Diana continues to evolve and surprise me as a viewer and I think she is one of the best characters to have ever been on TV. I can’t wait to see where the rest of the season takes her.

Apologies for the jumping from one thing to another but I have just come back to life after this episode rendered me dead, so my thought processes are still a bit all over the place…ah yes, Josh. Now I know that there is a bit of frustration out there about the way Caitlin is fuelling Josh’s hope but funnily enough, it did not bother me overly in this ep. When Josh comes to the apartment with the gifts (one for Maggie and one for Liza) it becomes clear pretty quickly that Caitlin’s last conversation she had with her mother was around the fact that they’d broken up but were no longer on good terms. Which is beside the point tbh. As Liza herself says, her romantic relationships are none of her business. From that one would hope Caitlin might think perhaps that means there have been or are other relationships other than Josh…but nope.

The thing I really liked about the present scene was that Caitlin’s immaturity is showing here so badly, highlighted only by Maggie’s ‘wtf is wrong with you?’ looks. The idea that a relationship can go from romantic to platonic is beyond her (although she is right that Josh is still in the loves with Liza) and the aspect that bothered me about her going to speak to Josh before he left was more that is was a super immature thing to do. It’s immature in its sweetness and desire to see her mum happy, as well as immature in the lack of consideration that there may be complicated factors at play that she’s not privy to. I get that she thinks she’s helping fix a situation but it’s really very disrespectful after Liza was quite clear about where it stands. So Caitlin doesn’t bother me, if anything it shows that there is a really big disconnect between who she thinks her mum is and who her mum really is and I do hope that is rectified in the near future.

And my take on the Josh situation is as it stood last week. I feel like we’re beating a dead horse here. The whole ‘don’t give up on her’ line, I know the writers want to keep a flame flickering but at this point it’s actually just tiresome. I’m trying to be objective and think how I would feel if I was Team Josh and this was my situation but you know, I legitimately watch this show because I love it overall and if the ship I was digging wasn’t sailing I’d still  be watchng, I just wouldn’t be so invested that I feel the need to write atrociously self-indulgent posts about my thoughts and feelings after every episode...but if my main reason for watching was the ship and it was Josh/Liza I think I actually would’ve stopped watching. With Liza’s growth and development this past season and a bit, even if she doesn’t end up with Charles, it would be a complete disservice to her character to go back to Josh. I said it last week and I’ll say it again, the character of Josh has stagnated so badly that he is quickly becoming unlikable so I really, genuinely, hope that the writers give this character some kind of rejuvenation and a life. At some point the desire to try and keep ALL fans happy by trying to maintain a limping love triangle is going to backfire and no one will be happy.

This is absurdly long so I will close part 1 of this ramble and continue shortly with post 2, the Charles and Liza chronicles…