#this is 90% projecting btw. i hope you know.

[skittlespizza]

Bpd Kian Stone, The Essay:

BPD is characterized as: unstable moods, behaviors, and relationships. Kian fits a lot of the BPD symptoms and it's just. It fits too well and my BPD addled projecting self can't help it.

First and foremost, Kian didn't have a great childhood I mean. neglectful parents, a lack of affection or love, seems like an unhappy childhood.

Something people with BPD struggle with is an intense fear of abandonment which, especially in Becky, Kian kind of... has? Kian spends an absurd amount of time mourning his HIGH SCHOOL GIRLFRIEND and by absurd I mean over 10 years. That isn't normal behavior, and really, it gives obsession and FP behavior. What's an FP?

An FP is term that describes a person who the person with BPD is, well to put it, sort of obsessed with and Kian... listen man. I can't stress the Kianbecky relationship FITTING THIS. Kian's happiness and emotions depend solely on how Becky feels and if she's there and when she wasnt, well. Hollywood happens and what happend to Kian happens and hrrhhhfh rhe obsession, the need for Becky to be there even after all that time... I might be looking too into this but I can relate to that and this is a headcanon...

A chronic emptiness is another thing people with Bpd struggle with. They often find themselves filling this with money or other people and BPD IS BASICALLY just this chronic emptiness leading to unstable relationships and I feel like Kian throws drugs, money, alcohol and useless one night stands at that empty hole to try and fill it because nothing will make him feel whole. Even Becky was only a tarp to cover that hole, she wasn't a solution. This hole probably came from a lack of love he got as a kid but whatever.

OK next thing, splitting, or the intense switching between something or someone being good or bad (like personally i do this with people, like my brain switches from they hate me they want me dead until they text me five minutes later and im fine). we don't see this happen in canon since Kian barely got any time to progress and shit but I can. I can headcanon this okay. so in his time in hollywood he definitely struggled with "god they all fucking hate me" and "man they love me look at all the good memories we had!" he had no real connections in hollywood so all he had were those memories to be his only friends and hrrhhhh

rapid changes in identity is another thing and boy does he change! he's literally a stock broker and he can't be Kian when he's a stock broker because he'd just get fired. but I see this most in his personality in general. he's a very stereotypical Rockstar guy, especially at first glance, he never truly grew up normally and never made his own identity because he had no guidance. instead he saw things from TV and movies and books and magazines that he liked and he absorbed that into his personality and he's just. a fucked up frankenstein of things he's seen in fiction. this is also a headcanon but.

"Impulsive and risky behavior, such as gambling, reckless driving, unsafe sex, spending sprees, binge eating or drug abuse, or sabotaging success by suddenly quitting a good job or ending a positive relationship" is another one and dear God Kian babygirl you have this in LEAGUES. Reckless driving? Spending sprees? Drug abuse meaningless sex and alcohol all fit under this and he does all of them A LOT. ESPECIALLY THE RECKLESS DRIVING. DRIVIJG UNDER THE INFLUENCE. THIS ONE FITS SO WELL AND ALL THIS UNSAFE BEHAVIOR GIVES HIM THIS TEMPORARY EUPHORIA WHERE HE FEELS ALIVE AND HE CHASES THIS TO FILL HIS CHRONIC EMPTINESS ANF GIVE ME A MINUTE I NEED TO CRY.

kian is bright and flashy and reckless and fills an empty void in his heart through everything he can find and how can anyone even love him when he's perfectly crafted to BE loved by people but he's not a person. he is made to be likeable but its so fake and he knows it is and their words mean nothing because nothing is genuine and nothing will mean as much as Becky and rolan and Rand-

his relationship with Rand and rolan also interests Me too, it's less codependent than Becky but There's still Something Wrong there, and I think it's just because they were his only TRUE FRIENDS, he could be nerdy and play dnd and I like to think that around them was the only time he could be himself (besides you know. being bisexual,,,) and that's the only time he felt seen and genuine and understood and hh

okay that's my bpd Kian Ted talk thing bye

[agirlwithglam]

Do you ever feel sick and don't feel like doing anything when the day before you told yourself you were going to do a glow up, live always the best ecc..?

yes definitely! unless i'm actually sick and incapable of doing anything, i will at least try. you didn't ask for advice, but here we go anyways. when i feel like that, heres a few things i do:

how to do things when you don't feel like doing them: (from personal experience)

believe that you can do anything. dont roll your eyes at me! dont skip this part either. this is the main point that gets me going every single time. i truly believe that i can do anything, that i am capable of literally anything that i want to achieve. if i want it, i will have it. that is the first mindset you must have when it comes to this.

start small/ make it fun. yes, ofc i said this. if you can't do a full 1 hour workout, do some pushups/squats/lunges and go for a bike ride or a walk with a friend. what i do when im going bike riding with a friend is we go to a mall and buy drinks there! so make it fun! adding friends to whatever you need to do certainly makes it fun. another thing you can do is if you need to read, you can create a cosy spot in your room with scented candles and a little snack and everything and sit and read there. just the idea of it gets me excited!

treat yourself like a project/ robot. now THIS is something that has certainly gotten my some discipline. we as humans have emotions and feelings and moods. sometimes we don't wanna do stuff, and we actually cave into that. if you promised yourself that you would change your life, switch off your emotions and moods. treat yourself like a robot or an "apprentice" that you're training to become the best.

reward yourself! so you can either reward the action (like reading or studying) or the outcome (like finishing a book or getting a high mark on a test). decide what works the best for you. example: you don't wanna study? you can either a) reward yourself for studying with some free time with friends or watching your fav show or b) you can reward your self by the score you get on the test (ex if you got higher than 80%= a certain thing on your wish list, above 90%= a better thing on your wish list, 100%= the thing you've wanted for ages) you don't wanna read? you can either.. a) reward yourself for reading for x amount of minutes or b) you can reward yourself for finishing a book in a certain amount of time.

alter egosss. i know, i mention this quite often, but trust me this actually gives such a burst of emotion! embody someone else/ a different version of you that can best handle the situation. im gonna make a whole post on alter egos soon cus i mention it in a lot of my posts.

EDIT:

Please remember that if ur actually sick or genuinely feeling really low, remember to rest!! Remember to take time to relax and slow down. Take care of yourself honey <3

thats it for now! i hope this helped <3

btw heres a big master-post to how to get things done when you dont want to (not by me)

[imperiuswrecked]

So I was browsing through some of your old posts and one of them mentioned that Namor was r*ped? When did that happen? Would you ever consider writing something that deals with the fallout of that? Hope you're doing well btw

Thank you, I am doing fine, and I hope you are too! CW for Heavy/Dark Themes, Rape, Sexual Assault.

(During the 90s Reed Richards was written out of Fantastic Four comics, and presumed dead by literally everyone in the comic world except for Susan who believed he was still alive. In real world time Reed was gone for years, and this was really unheard of for one of Marvel's important characters because the Fantastic Four were Marvel's big team. So it really looked like Reed wasn't going to come back. I say this to let you know why Reed wasn't around in these comics, and to mention that Susan never cheated on Reed.)

So I was browsing through some of your old posts and one of them mentioned that Namor was r*ped? When did that happen?

Yes, Namor was canonically raped in Namor, the Sub-Mariner (1990) #49-50; Empress Llyra (the shapeshifting half Human/Lemurian woman who poisoned Namora, killed Lady Dorma, and helped Tiger Shark kill Namor's father, and tried killing Namor) shapeshifted into Susan (The Invisible Woman) and raped Namor. The next day Namor finds out that Susan never slept with him and that it was Llyra, he snaps and tries to kill her but is stopped by Susan, and the text is very explicit in saying "There's a word for what she did to me, Susan. Had it been committed against you, would you not feel justified?", and this was confirmed by the writer Glenn Herdling in an interview by Twomorrows Back Issue #91.

Back Issue #91: Namor #50 (May 1994) deals with a touchy subject, as Herdling points out. "My friend Chris Cooper, a former Marvel editor and author of Songs of the Metamythos, recently reminded me that Namor was raped in an issue I wrote. In her attempt to spawn an heir to the throne of Atlantis, Namor's nemesis Llyra seduced him by disguising herself as Sue Richards. Chris asked me if I regretted writing that scene. I told him that I thought it was a powerful story, and if I had to tell it all over again, I wouldn't change a thing. People don't think a strong, virile hero like Namor - who represents the essence of masculinity - could ever be a victim of rape. Namor is a attractive, stalwart individual with a magnetic personality who has always been portrayed as having an insatiable appetite for the fairer sex. When a female adversary takes sexual advantage of such a man, a common reaction is, 'So what?' Sue Richards illustrates this double standard when she demands to know why Namor was in a homicidal rage. Namor retorts, 'If the act had been committed upon you, Susan Richards, it would be called something else.' At the time if I had proposed such a story and the victim had been female, it would have never seen the light of day."

Would you ever consider writing something that deals with the fallout of that?

I have written many scenes that deal with the fallout of Llyra's actions towards Namor, and a have planned a big portion of my fic, Sub-Mariner: Ascension around the 90s and all that happens. Is any of it published on my Ao3 yet? No, but it will be sometime in the future.

Unfortunately I don't have a set date for when I update fics, it depends on my schedule, and my ability/energy to write. I've been struggling a lot with writing lately so I am working on trying to finish my other works before devoting myself back to my Sub-Mariner: Ascension fic as that's really my long time pet project, it's a fic that is more of a novel, or several novels, that chronical Namor's life through the comics but with a more in depth look at his adventures and his character, it's darker at some points than the comics ever go, and deal with a lot of heavy subjects like the above mentioned incident, as well as Namor's time growing up, his time in the war, with each team he's been on, and each loss he's endured. It's supposed to flesh out and connect a lot of threads that the comics never pick up on while including new original elements. I did commission a fanart of for this too, and I hope over time to commission more arts for this story, as well as finish writing it.

I have toyed with several ideas of a stand alone fics that covers what happened to Namor, this time and other instances*, but I was never sure if anyone would be interested in dark fics that has heavy angst/whump as well as dealing with this topic for Namor.

*This also isn't the first time Namor was raped, or sexually assaulted, however it's always played off, never spoken of again, or turned into "well he wanted it".

The first time a shapeshifter seduced and tricked Namor into sexual relations was in The Defenders (1972) #93; The dead Lady Dorma seemingly comes back to life and places a spell/mind control on Namor to do her bidding and attack the surface world. The Defenders figure out something is wrong with Namor and "Dorma" reveals herself as Nebulon, The Celestial Man. He was recurring enemy of The Defenders, and when Namor finds out that "Lady Dorma" was Nebulon he fights him and says, "You have violated my very consciousness, Nebulon -- defiled the memory of the fairest creature I have ever known! You have used me scum -- and The Sub-Mariner is not lightly used!" -- "When I think that I... held you in my arms -- let my lips brush yours... I am sickened."

(So while Herdling thinks he's written this happening to Namor for the first time, it's not, however Herdling does point out in no uncertain terms what it is. Which is a far better writing than what Johnny Storm (The Human Torch) got stuck with. It's actually so interesting that both Namor & Johnny got a story arc about a green skinned shape-shifter Llyra & Lyja who takes on the shape of other women to trick the men into sleeping with or marrying them only for the truth to come out. In fact Namor in these issues even thinks it's Lyja who raped him before figuring out it's Llyra.

While Namor got to say what happened to him was rape, Johnny doesn't. Johnny gets made fun of for Lyja. More about this subject in this post by @/ Traincat) )

Marvel Comics Presents (1988) #58 - Just an issue ago Namor was thinking suicidal thoughts over losing his wife, Marrina, and gets roped into helping some humans. Sandra touches and kisses Namor thinking that him being annoyed by her is just a front for unresolved sexual tension between them, but Namor rebuffs her and tells her that his affections are not so easily won. Later a mysterious old man tells Namor he needs to relax and to appreciate the pleasures life offers him.

Basically the comic dismisses Namor being uncomfortable with a strange woman who came onto him, and tells him he needs to enjoy himself. Nothing romantic happens between Namor & Sandra in later comics.

Namor, the Sub-Mariner (1990) Annual 3 - Namor is visiting a friend in Tokyo, and the friend's (wife? girlfriend? text just says woman) woman comes to Namor in the middle of the night seeking to sleep with him. He tells her this is improper, and she leaves, she returns more dressed, and seduces Namor again, against his protests, touching, kissing him, before a panel shows Namor giving in. It's later revealed the woman is a cyborg assassin.

The framing of this pretty much shows how uncomfortable Namor is with the whole situation.

Namor, the Sub-Mariner (1990) #36 - The Neried seek to seduce Namor by shifting their forms to look like Lady Dorma & Marrina, his dead wives, but he rejects him, and just like in The Defenders, he is enraged someone would take on the forms of women he loved so deeply and dearly.

The Invaders (1975) Annual 1 - The Shark, knocks Namor out, ties him up, changes his clothing to steal his speedos. While it's played for comedic effect, this isn't the first or last time a villain has tied Namor up, but I make special mention of this because of the fact that at one point while unconscious Namor was stripped naked against his will.

Villains often admire Namor's body, and remark on it. Honestly the amount of times Namor's been tied up, abused, experimented on, etc. happens so many times that it'd need it's own post.

One more I'd like to mention because of the implications is Dark X-Men: The Beginning #1 - Norman wants Namor on his side, and has a talk with Namor while he's in the shower (full comic) and while Namor definitely has the strength to defend himself, this is more of a psychological play by Norman, talking to a person while they are naked is a very vulnerable moment, the hand touch, etc. Norman knows he can't control Namor through brute strength so he positions himself in a way that gives him power over Namor while also offering Namor things he wants, a mention of how he can give Namor a place to belong, with Emma, a home on his team.

As many Namor fans know, Namor does not like to be touched without consent, even if its a tap on the shoulder, and while the comics have often implied it's because Namor is royal, he's arrogant, he doesn't want peasant hands to touch him, etc. honestly I personally just headcanon that after years of people touching him when he doesn't want to be touched he's just put up a wall of arrogance to defend himself from further molestation. It wouldn't be too far fetched to think so because even as a kid he was (physically & verbally abused) by his grandfather (Namor: The First Mutant (2010) #4), beat up by other Atlantean kids, etc. so why would he want people he doesn't trust touching him. He's unclothed a lot, and people think that means it's ok to touch when it's not. Even when it's just a person he knows, he doesn't like it.

Defenders (2001) #7

I know this is a long reply, but it's just a subject that I don't think gets discussed enough tbh. Also to make one final point is bringing this back to what Herdling said in his interview: When a female adversary takes sexual advantage of such a man, a common reaction is, 'So what?'

While I'm not a fan of Herdling's writing, his run on Namor, the Sub-Mariner (1990) had so many issues with plot, etc. I do think he makes an interesting point in this interview (that took place in 2016? I think) about the double standard male characters face when it comes to Rape, Sexual Assault, and on another note Domestic Abuse, or any time of crime that we typically associate with men doing to women, how there's a general lack of care. It's turned into a joke when a woman abuses a man, or how the man is treated as something less if he doesn't perform masculinity to societies standards. Namor + Masculinity is a topic that could be discussed further, because he is one of the characters that many people think has toxic masculinity but they just haven't read his comics. While Namor definitely has some bad qualities, he's also very confident in himself and his masculinity, so by Herdling not shying away from the subject that "yes, Namor was raped, no I don't regret writing it", it's so interesting. A lot of creators often just shy away from confirming anything or try to defend their choice to have a male character raped/sexually assaulted, or excuse it, or ignore it, or make fun of it, or blame the male character. ESPICALLY when a character is, like Namor, a lover, a flirt, probably promiscuous, they are blamed for what women do to them. One example that drives me so insane is Gambit. I'll put the rest under a cut since it's more graphic than what I've shared so far, and further down I analyze Namor, the Sub-Mariner (1990) #49-50 in more depth.

I think the only male character who's depiction of rape (twice) is actually done differently and not brushed off or treated as a joke is Captain Britain. (Of course there's probably other stories out there with other characters but I'm just going off what I know in the big 2, Marvel & DC comics). You can read this post that goes more into Brian's experiences by @/ Thisiswhatwereupagainst.

CW for Heavy/Dark Themes, Rape, Sexual Assault, Incestuous implications.

If you haven't read X-Men (1991) #171-173, then I'd warn you about how bad the writing is; a student, Foxx, propositions Gambit, comes onto him while he's in the shower, he rejects her. He's blamed for taking advantage of a student (why do characters think the worst of Remy, he's not a bad guy!), then he finds out Foxx is actually Mystique who claims to want to sleep with Remy for the sake of her daughter. He rejects her again, but doesn't tell anyone about it, and when it gets out that it's Mystique then Rogue is mad at Remy for keeping it a secret. The sexual assault isn't ever brought up again and is ignored, but again it was framed as "Remy is a sexual dude, he would be ok with it, besides who cares?" Just because a character is promiscuous doesn't mean they want/deserve something like this to happen to them.

Both Namor and Remy are seen as charming, they get the girls, "so what if they are subject to unwanted attention? They should enjoy it..."

It doesn't help that both Remy & Namor have had moments of queer writing, with Remy & Namor nearly being made Bisexual/Gay, (Namor's was in an AU) but they were barred from being canon lgbtq characters in Marvel by the bosses, even though there are times throughout their 616 comics where you can interpret them as not just cis straight men.

--- At the time if I had proposed such a story and the victim had been female, it would have never seen the light of day."

Nightwing (1996) #93 - Nightwing is raped while in an emotionally compromised state, but if he had been a woman would that issue have seen the light of day?

Wonder Woman (1987) #214 - The Flash (Wally West) is beaten and sexually assaulted by Cheetah.

He's a married man, but Cheetah calls him lover as she beats him, and is about to rape him before she's stopped. If it was reversed would this have been allowed to see the light of day?

Flash brushes off this experience.

I'm not saying that women in comics haven't been raped or assaulted but I'm just pointing to a few examples of how differently male vs female characters are treated, "because it's not acceptable for it to have happened to a woman but it's ok for a man" Herdling basically says.

A more in depth look at Namor, the Sub-Mariner (1990) #48-49.

First off the cover is just Bad. Like really bad, like "What on earth possessed you to make THAT cover?!" The theme of one man with a haram of sexy ladies isn't unheard of, that's not why it's bad though I do side eye it anyways, but the reason it's bad is because of who the women are.

Andromeda - Namor's friend, a proud a fierce Atlantean warrior, the daughter of Attuma, who has Namor's trust and confidence. Namor appointed her as Peacelord, she's basically become the captain of Namor's guard. While Andromeda has/had a crush Namor, nothing ever came of it and Namor never viewed her in a romantic light, only as a friend.

Marrina - Namor's second wife, they were happily married for a short time before Marrina turned into a sea monster, she breifely turns back into herself only to beg Namor to promise to end her life so that she no longer harms anyone else, and Namor honors her wish after she turns back into a sea monster, killing her with a magic sword. It makes sense for her to be on the cover.

Princess Fen - Namor's mother. Yes. His mother. Do I need to say more? Like why the fuck would you put Namor's MOM in a sexy lady Haram group shot with a title card that reads "Haunted by memories of lost love!" we know the writer intended romantic love, not platonic or familial love. Namor & his mom have never had an incestuous relationship ever.

Lady Dorma - Namor's first wife, who was murdered by Empress Llyra. He loved her very much. (I know people will always point out that Dorma was Namor's "cousin" but honestly the comics never state they are blood/close cousins, only a loose term of "cousins", Dorma was a Lady of the Altantean Court, a noble family.) They grew up as friends in court, and she was one of the only people who treated Namor kindly, and he doesn't even realize his true feelings for her until they are both adults. It makes sense for her to be on the cover.

Namorita - Namor's younger cousin. While I know there's people who will point out that Nita had a crush on Namor when she first knew who he was, I will also point out that Nita was like 16 years old, a stupid horny teenager who was raised alone (and probably abused) in the court of Empress Llyra after Llyra poisoned her mother, and Namor was the first person to defend her when she needed it, AND I will also point out her "crush" lasted barely a comic before she found a cute human sailor boy her age to crush on instead. Namor's only ever treated her like a little sister and again not in an incestuous manner. So again, why do we have her in a sexual position here?

Susan Richards - a married woman who long ago told Namor she doesn't love him several times, the Namor/Sue ship was dead in the water, and Namor had moved on from his infatuation, and was married twice. He never had his feelings reciprocated. I understand why she's on the cover but I just don't like it. lol.

The comic promises to dive into Namor's lost romances of the past, but out of all the women featured here the only 2 who loved Namor & he returned their love were Marrina & Dorma. For Andromeda it was a one sided crush on her end, and for Susan it was a unhealthy obsessive infatuation on Namor's end. It really feels like they just wanted to have sexy ladies on the cover and that's why its framed this way. Furthermore Namor is chained to the bed, while his arm is around Lady Dorma, he is staring blankly past everyone.

Namor is haunted by nightmares of losing his mother, of the Witch-Queen Artys-Gran, and of his dead wives.

He awakens and learns he's in a decompression chamber to stablize him. Susan and Namor talk about their lost spouses, and rekindle their friendship. However nothing romantic has happened between them. Later in the comic Namor is in bed, reading a book, at Oracle Inc. the company that he owns and runs, he has personal rooms, and a private pool, because he was living there most of the time, when a mysterious shrouded female figure enters in a short robe.

The comic ends in a cliff hanger, and the next comic it's revealed that it was Susan (Storm) Richards. Or is it?

The cover shows Namor kissing Susan while Johnny, Ben, and Lyja look on in shock and horror. The tagline on the inner splash page reads "Someone's been sleeping in my bed".

Namor and Susan get dressed for the day while discussing what happened last night. Namor feels uneasy but doesn't know why.

Namor goes off to his company for a meeting before going to Hydrobase to speak with Andromeda, and the off to see Nita who gives him some advice about dating, a tux, and flowers. Namor's happy but nervous, however when he gets to Fantastic Four and gives the flowers to Susan, Susan is confused and angrily snaps at Namor for touching her.

Ben punches Namor, everyone thinks Namor is trying to make a sleazy move on Susan for some reason, and while Namor's trying to explain and say it's between him and Susan, still believing that she was with him last night, all four of them battle, in the end Lyja shapeshifts into a monster to join the fight, and Namor seeing her change her form realizes that it wasn't Susan who slept with him last night. Mistakenly he believes that Lyja was the woman who came to him last night and attacks her. However he realizes it's not her, but that it was another shapeshifter. He leaves the Fantastic Four, and they follow.

Phoebe Marrs, an employee who took over running Oracle, and a recurring character from the series (earlier on in the series it was implied that her son's father was her twin brother Desmond, and Desmond died by suicide, however she's been seeing his "ghost") Namor figures out that the "ghost" is real, and it was a shapeshifter, his theory is right and it's revealed that Llyra has been around for ages posing as both Desmond and Phoebe on occasion. Also Llyra (as Phoebe) slept with both Jim Hammond (earlier in the series Jim thought he was sleeping with Phoebe who came onto him, so he was shocked to learn that it was Llyra, so she had raped him as she had Namor), and Leon McKenzie (*sigh* a secret son of Leonard McKenzie/his second wife, who then had a son named Leon, who would be Namor's nephew and works at Oracle, no one cares or remembers him).

At this reveal and the realization that he slept with his most hated enemy, again the woman who has poisoned his cousin Namora, who killed Lady Dorma, and helped kill his father, a woman he despises. A woman who since day 1 has wanted Namor romantically even though he never wanted her in that way. A woman Namor has vowed to kill in revenge for Dorma's death. Llyra raped him because he would have never slept with her if he knew. He snapped, and tries to kill her, and demands to know "why?", and Llyra spits on him as an answer. Namor tries to kill her, but is stopped by Susan. His hurt, his pain, his abuse, his rape is met with a "so what?" "no matter what she did to you, you can't kill her". Namor can't kill his rapist because Susan says he can't. Llyra then says he can't because she is pregnant with his child (She's not, it's Leon's child) and Namor is shocked, he lets her go, calls her a sick woman, Namor chooses not to press charges against Llyra and let's her go.

Then Namor loses it, like he starts laughing manically, and it makes the Fantastic Four uncomfortable so they just leave. Namor doesn't tell the rest of the Fantastic Four that he is sterile (this has since been retconned), and he can't have children, so he doesn't believe Llyra is pregnant with his child.

Later Susan shows up to check up on Namor, and he tells her he wanted to be alone with his shame, and they discuss how they could never be.

Then for some stupid reason Herdling has Susan and Namor kiss. It makes no sense, but Herdling liked the idea of Namor/Sue, but though the writer wanted, he knew he couldn't go further than a kiss. (Back Issue interview) I suppose people could look at it as a "a comfort/pity kiss" but honestly I hate the Namor/Sue ship too much to see it as anything but a writer's ship preference. People point to it to say Susan cheated on Reed by kissing Namor (this is the ONE time this happens) but at this point in the comics Reed is "dead". I hate when people try to say Susan is a cheating slut so it feels so disingenuous to say this was a kiss made of love or lust or whatever, instead of acknowledging that the writer really wanted to get a Namor/Sue kiss in.

Personally I think the issue of what happened to Namor is very overlooked by fans and creators, that Namor is a victim of rape, and how although it is acknowledged in it's moment, people still don't give it the gravitas it deserved, especially for a character like Namor. True this comic didn't brush off or ignore what Llyra did to Namor, but by the end of it, the Namor/Sue kiss, it really does feel like "ok, Namor is a little sad but he's ok once Susan REALLY gave him a kiss" so it does feel like the writer brushed off the effects of his abuse.

What's more, why? why would Namor ever feel comfortable kissing Susan when her likeness was used to hurt him? Why would be ok with any physical touch or sex or kissing when just a day before he was raped? Again, comics do not handle the fall out of rape well at all.

Now with Aaron writing Namor, and underwater politics, and a war for the Atlantean throne, I suppose we'll see if Llyra will ever return to make a play for the throne that she wants so badly, but I won't be surprised if Aaron doesn't ever use Llyra, because then he'd have to actually write about Namor confronting his rapist after Namor left Llyra to die in Fantastic Four Unlimited (1993) #11 (she survived somehow of course, but she hasn't interacted with Namor since.)

Anyways like Namor's canon PTSD, we won't get much depth into heavy subject matter and deeper characterization unless a good writer really wants to write it. And that's the full story of Namor's rape in Namor, the Sub-Mariner (1990) #49-50.

[excessive-moisture]

i was compiling a list of animators that make me feel inspired today cos im trying to get motivated. and honestly. i have concluded you are like, top of the list. i've been having thoughts on this, so here they are.

your unique talent (in my opinion) that i hardly see anywhere else, is your ability to just try shit. in your process videos (which are the BEST btw) you are constantly running into roadblocks, time crunches, and a billion things you don't know how to do, and you just roll with the punches- coming up with new tricks on the fly, committing to shots that came out wonky, slapping editing effects on shit and calling it a day. Genuinely aspirational stuff- i've always tried to be an antiperfectionist, but some of the shortcuts you use are things i never would have even thought of.

i have a lot of big ideas for longer, voice acted animations. they always seem way out of reach, but then you just, started making a series of voice acted and largely fully animated inv animations, as if it was no big deal. and it makes me think, i could do that. Why am i just sitting here thinking about my projects and feeling terrible, when you are out here making whatever you want, uncertainty be damned? the energy of your videos is a combination of constant panic and incredible bravery. i hope that you are having the time of your life and never stop alienating 90% of your audience with whatever your current interest is.

side note, but shout out to your audio work- just all of it, any time you do anything with audio, it carries the same ingenuity and improvisational flair i admire in your animation work but with a baseline of competency too. you've worked with audio quite a bit over the years and it shows.

going to have to stop here because my hands have gotten shaky for an unknown reason i need to go figure out. but yes, in conclusion northflowo iss best animator thanks for coming to my ted talk

holdon i need to sit down a moemnt

[theschizotypalsolilquy]

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

What are you saying you dumb fuck ?

Why do you want him to be straight so badly?

Says someone who pathetically wants him to be gay and ships him with his bandmate who's also straight. Jiimin himself saying he asking HER out.. it's all needed to prove he's into women. While it's YOU who wants him to be gay so badly.

It's cuz you think you'd have a chance with him if he was.

Aigoo don't worry about me. 90% of JM stans hope JM finds a beautiful kind girl for himself and be happy. Btw you can't have a chance with him in your big age anyway so are you a fetishist who use JK as a vessel to project your feeling towards Jimin ? You know he don't want you nor JK. But you keep on saying Jk is his partner as if he said that to you personally.

YOU GAY SHIPPERS NEVER WANT TO GET OUT OF YOUR FANTASIES EVEN IF THE PART OF YOUR SHIP EXPLAINS THE REAL MEANING BEHIND HIS SONGS AND HOW HE WANTS A FREAKING GIRL FRIEND. HE WANTS A WOMAN, A PUSSY, A WIFE, MOM OF HIS KIDS.

I want him to be gay?

I do?

Wow. And here I thought I was just going by what those two kinky fuckers have been saying and showing us for over 10 years.

Yall always come on here saying that we are discounting what he says and blah blah blah

When yall have been ignoring the rainbows those two have been dropping for years.

I want JK??? Huh??

Where? When? Why? What?

Awwww....and you tried to make a dig about my age. Is me being a mature woman with an extremely active love and sex life supposed to be a bad thing? Am I supposed to sob in a corner cuz some young thing thinks I give a fuck what they think about anything that I post on my blog?

I respond to these not because I think you're worth my time.

It's cuz yall are so easy to fuck with in believing that I take anything yall say seriously

[yukidragon]

Ian was saying that more complex toppings were more ‘mature’ (as opposed to plain cheese pizza which admittedly is popular with children) plus cashews are expensive/fancy/healthy. Is he trying to project a more sophisticated image or something?

Is poor Sunshine the familiar, reliable but boring childhood comfort food he’s leaving behind to try something (or someone) more adventurous and glamorous?

Does he at one point start to see himself as outgrowing them? (In the opening of the game Sunshine expresses the opposite, implying Ian is the one childhood thing they’re nostalgic for. Ouch.)

He seems to talk about cheese pizza like they always get it, like it’s the safe fallback option… hmmm…

Googling brings up stuff about cashews being offered as a pizza topping in some places in the Northwest, others say it originated from some place in California called Dave’s Gay 90s. Can’t speak to the truth of that and don’t know why a young man living in Texas wants it, but perhaps it reflects his aspirations.

California is apparently home to a number of actors that have made it big and perhaps that’s where his acting school is?

So the cheese pizza is his safe childish past with Sunshine and the Californian cashew pizza topping is symbolic of the acting success he’s hoping his adult future will be?

I don’t know, I’m not American

Your analysis is very insightful. I think you did a great job with it. I really like the idea of the pizza being a metaphor for MC and Ian's relationship.

It would sadly make a lot of sense that part of why Ian cheated was because he outgrew the relationship and MC. It/they didn't satisfy him anymore. He wanted new, exciting, more mature things. MC was safe, nostalgic... a piece of Ian's childhood.

It makes sense too why after Ian cheated, MC recklessly abandons anything nostalgic. They're trying to move on from those feelings that Ian took for granted after the cheating tainted them.

It also makes sense why Ian is so desperate to get MC back, as new things, however exciting, are scarier than something safe and familiar.

Sometimes I've heard stories about couples that were together for years since they were teenagers who clicked just right and seemed perfect for one another... only to end abruptly when one partner suddenly starts wanting more. They want to explore independence, other relationships, and everything the world has to offer. They could even regard their partner as perfect even while their feelings have cooled, lamenting that if only they met later in life when they were ready to settle down in a serious relationship... then everything would feel perfect. They wouldn't be feeling this restlessness. The relationship would actually feel satisfying to them.

Then those same restless exes, after cheating, breaking up, whatever, and losing their former partner... They discover that they miss their ex despite being the one to break their former lover's heart when seeking freedom. The other relationships, though exciting, aren't as fulfilling as the childhood sweetheart they dumped. If they can at least stay friends then there's a chance of getting back together, but if not... then it becomes terrifying as their safety net is gone.

Speaking of the fallback option, there's this one picture that isn't necessarily canon where Ian talked about MC as if they were his fallback option if acting didn't work out.

Credit, as always, goes to the awesome Sauce. Sorry about the cropping, but tumblr will not accept what's to the left of this image. You can check the full NSFW version out here if you want to see Ian and MC going at it.

BTW consider checking out the SnaccPop Studios Patreon. It's got a lot of other nice and spicy things. Just don't repost anything posted there.

Ian might be showing his insecurity here, but consider the timeline. If acting worked out, he leaves MC to go to his fancy acting school. There, he seems to have made it as a model and actor... and it's (presumably) where he cheated. He got what he wanted, all the excitement and fame of the life of an actor... including an exciting tryst... then he realized that he betrayed all his ideals, everything he said before about only loving and wanting MC, and his relationship with MC all for one moment of excitement.

MC was the comfortable option, the nostalgic option, the safe option... but sometimes a person just wants to take risks, to "grow up" and be adventurous... and sometimes that leads to reckless decisions, like what happened with Ian.

We might not know for sure exactly what led Ian to cheat, but he knows he messed up, as he admits to himself in the demo. He knows he wrecked a good thing... and that's why he's so desperate to get his safe nostalgia back.

Guess cashew pizza wasn't all that it was cracked up to be, was it, Ian?

@channydraws @earthgirlaesthetic @sai-of-the-7-stars @cheriihoney @illary-kore @okamiliqueur

[livvyofthelake]

bethhhhh unfortunately I have literally nothing to say about percy jackson but tell me about your new project <33 are you trying to watch literally Every sherlock adaptation because that would be insane... also only vaguely relevant but you would loveeee murder most unladylike I'm so serious....

noooo Every would be crazy i’m not doing that let’s be serious. you could hold a gun to my head and i still wouldn’t want to watch a guy ritchie movie starring robert downey jr. but there are a few older movies i’ve found in the years i’ve been pondering and researching that might be good. yes actual years. haven’t wanted to watch any sherlock holmes adaptations because i know probably 90% of them are bad. especially considering what the popular one is that does NOT bode well for anything else!! but i needed to watch something eventually before 2026. as you should well know something big is happening that year i’ve been like. doomsday prepping for since like 2018. with a big pickup in pace in 2022. i think secrets of blackthorn hall created an Urgency i maybe didn’t need thanks for ruining my life cassie 😐 anyway. yeah we’ve got some films on the docket. nothing popular. and as everyone knows i’m never going to watch the bbc show unless i’m having a serious mental health episode in which case you should get me committed to an old timey asylum where they give me a lobotomy. naturally. that’s what i think should happen to all fans of that show btw <3 no offense.

but yeah i did start with young sherlock holmes because i had a feeling it couldn’t get worse than that and i think/hope i was right because wowie that was a crap movie! nowhere to go but up! unless. 😐 yeah it was a major L for women in a way not even reading the sign of the four was. which if you’ve read the sign of the four you’ll know is saying something. sorry for hating the sign of the four. it’s entirely possible the book would have been better to me had i not listened to a bad audiobook for half of it (narrator was INSUFFERABLEEEEE).

also no enola doesn’t count to me as a sherlock holmes adaptation she’s literally built different these things are not even connected to me other than that guy is there. but it’s sort of like. when cole sprouse is an insufferable freak in something that’s not riverdale and you’re like hey that’s jughead! it’s like that. sort of. not really

also i checked and my library doesn’t even have murder most unladylike… next time i’m in a drought of books for little girls though i WILL be hitting up thriftbooks to maybe buy them…. me and books for little girls are like THIS 🤞 fr

[koduflower2000]

"It's time to think outside the box 🤔🧐"

Hi! I'm Kevin, but you can also call me Kodu, if you prefer. I'm the actual guy from Twitter (X).

Pronouns: He/Him/They/Them (any of these is fine)

Age: 19 years

Nationality: Sri Lankan

Timezone: Indian Standard Time (IST) (GMT+5:30)

A straight guy who supports the LGBTQ+ community (more specifically, I'm a straight cisgender ally)

A silly child at heart

Open talker (yes, you can be friends with me if you want)

Draws art just by using a mouse.

Speed variation of me drawing is frequent (sometimes I draw faster, other times I draw slowly)

I'm currently learning Russian BTW. Я не знаю что я делаю. 😔

Also I'm learning Spanish, and a little bit of German and French for entertainment. I hope to learn Ukrainian, Arabic and Danish any time soon.

I do music (it's actually one of my favorite things to do)

I do programming sometimes (I haven't uploaded a single cool project in here at all, as I remember) (another one of my favorites to do)

I mostly don't swear, except when I feel intense emotions. (if you're comfortable with reading my posts with swear words, go ahead. I won't judge)

I reblog a lot, so if you really wanna see what I've been working on, here are some tags in which you can look around.

#koduflower2000 art - art by me

#koduflower2000 projects - will be a tag in which i present my art and music projects.

#koduflower2000 talks - mostly something i wanna say

#koduflower2000 answers - a tag in which i answer to tumblr asks in my ask box

Interests

BFDI:TPOT (Battle For Dream Island: The Power Of Two)

BFB (Battle for BFDI)

BFDI (Battle For Dream Island)

III (Inanimate Insanity Invitational)

AvA (Animation vs Animator) series

AvM (Animation vs Minecraft) series

Bluey series from ABC Australia

Chickn Nuggit (i'm sorry i didn't tell you earlier)

Minecraft

Saw and Gaty (totally okay with those ships actually)

Airy and Popcorn from HFJONE (totally okay with those ships as well)

Fanfictions (started writing one btw)

Rhythm Games

Gaming

Computers

Linux

Information and Communication Technology

Language and Culture Learning

Science

Technology

Sports

DNI list:

Basic (you already know it)

Ableists

Anti-semitic people

Racists

Homophobic people (basically homophobes)

Pedophiles (basically MAPs)

Sexists

Xenophobic people (including islamophobes)

Transphobic people (basically transphobes)

TERFs (Trans-Exclusionary Radical Feminists, in other words, transphobic people who spread their gender opinions which are considered to be uncomfortable to trans people)

Advanced

Extreme NSFW accounts (a.k.a. the accounts with >=90% of the posts which are NSFW)

Pro-Israel people (I support Palestine, and no one can stop me)

People neutral with Palestine and the Palestinian people (Palestinian people are the best and they're considered innocent. Period.)

Zionists (If you try to interact with my account, I would like to fight you and block you.)

Proshippers (problematic ships, not professional ships)

Comshippers

People who spread misinformation against me

On thin ice

People who harass me or any of my moots.

People who think they're superior than everyone for no reason. (the only reason why i put it there is because i want people to talk with me instead of harassing me, because i already had a lot of traumatic experiences on twitter)

Blog Landmarks

tee hee moot rose! ^ ^

me too (a tribute to all my previous moots who have been disappeared from the internet)

kinda the reason why i don't interact in here as much as i wanna

the most important thing in tumblr that hits you hard like a high speed train

elements of the intro are subject to changes which occur periodically

[monkey-wrench-series]

Hi Zeurel, I just woke up from a dream where the next Monkey Wrench episode came out in a point and click 90s kids game format. Shrike and Beebs were walking around a decrepit dark space ship with the player POV following them. They were looking for Scritch and Scratch. The player could click on broken wires and mysterious figures and they would dance and sing. Also there was a weird part where Shrike found a bunch of drugs and it was implied the cat gang did drugs and it was like.... a serious tragic backstory :( ??? But the dream was mostly funny!

Anyway, I wanted to tell you that in the dream I was very happy! I hope you and Ash know that monkey wrench is something amazing and special, and it makes a lot of people happy and hopeful for the future of animation! When compared to a lot of other webseries, and to series that start out as webseries and get picked up as official series... woof.... Really tragic that Monkey Wrench hasn't been picked up or massively popular like those shows (yet). Well, nothing that's mainstream is usually any good anyway! My point is I am excited for more Monkey Wrench no matter what format it is in and I deeply admire you guys' determination. I know we will get to see the story that you are so determined to tell no matter what, no matter how long (or not long) it takes, and that makes me excited regardless of the format, and I will always support the project!

btw my father is actually CEO of Cartoon and Animation and he said he can make Monkey Wrench REAL on TV and give you 1 trillion dollars...... if you make Dr. Agness the new main character and kill the icky ugly guys named Shrike and Beebs bc they are actually EVIL and Agness is just poor and misunderstood granny. Thanks

lucky for you everyone dies at the end pf ep 3 and Agness escapes space jail to become the lead!

Just don't tell anyone I told you that.

[zepskies]

Happy Sunday! Fanfic question time again! This is more general but curious if you're a plotter or a seat of the pants (or some combo) kind of writer? If you do plot, do you wait until you have the beginning, middle and end mapped out or do you start before you know your end point and hope to find it along the way?

Also, do you listen to music while you write?

Hey, lovely, Happy Sunday to you too! 💕

Ooh I love these types questions, thank you!!

1. What kind of writer am I? ✍🏽

I like the terms "Plotter" vs. "Seat of the pants" kind of writer. In the past I've called them "Architects" vs. "Adventurers."

In most respects, I consider myself a Plotter/Architect. My brain craves structure to an almost ill degree when writing. 😂 The way I beat writer's block while working on a project is by having a roadmap of what's going to happen next, and that's thanks to my outline.

It'll include plot points, scene changes, and even dialogue and parts of scene that occur to me as I'm plotting. (I don't want to forget them!) This doesn't mean that plot points won't change, or get switched around, or get chucked entirely. But if I have the blueprints of the house, I can change a window here and there, so to speak.

So for longer stories like "Never Say Goodbye," "Smoke Eater," and "Break Me Down," I had a very extensive outline that I had to sketch out entirely before I started writing. I also have outlines for longer one-shots, especially ones with multiple parts, like in the Midnight Espresso-verse.

In fact, the only stories I freeform are the shorter requests/imagines that are sent in to me.

2. Do I listen to music when I'm writing? 🎵

Girl, HELL YES. 🎶 Music is a big part of my life in general, but I need to listen to music when I write. Depending on the story, character, setting, fandom, etc., I'll listen to different kinds of music to get into the vibe of that story.

On the story/chapter post, I often include what particular song inspired me because I felt the lyrics, genre, and/or vibe encapsulated the story I was trying to create. After all, most good songs are stories themselves.

For Break Me Down, for example, I think I've shared with you that I chose "All My Living Time" by Radio Company as the series song inspo. It influenced many of the story's chapter titles. But I also listened to "If I Didn't Care," and a lot of Frank Sinatra, Mel Torme, and others in that genre to get the vibe of Ben in my head.

As another example, when I write for Jason Teague or Sam Winchester, I listen to a lot of 90s - early 2000s alt rock and grunge — like Lifehouse, Matchbox 20, Pearl Jam, Five for Fighting, Smashing Pumpkins, Avril Lavigne, etc.

Whereas for Dean Winchester...

Of course it's a lot of classic rock: Journey, Led Zeppelin, Queensryche, Whitesnake, Foreigner, Styx, Fleetwood Mac, etc. But depending on the story, I'll listen to other stuff too. In fact, I often create specific playlists for different stories and series.

BTW: If you ever want a playlist for a story I've written, let me know! I think that would be a really fun project to put together.

Thank you so much for asking! And sorry, I got a bit long-winded again. 😅 Can I toss these questions back at you @luci-in-trenchcoats...

Are you a plotter/architect or an adventurer/freeformer? And if you listen to music when you write, what does that look like for you? I love hearing about other writers' processes. 💓💓

[mysmorgasbordoffantabulosa]

i'm one of those (rare) jikookers who actively manifests jk watching and reacting to tae content on live, and he kinda did today with winter bear and i felt sooooooo happy. you know why? for two reasons.

1. so tkkrs will stop with the "he doesn't watch tae stuff because he won't be able to control his emotions that will shine through"

2. and the "he's contractually forbidden from mentioning tae's projects on live"

both stupid reasons, and both got debunked today. first of all, he's not contractually forbidden from mentioning a band member and the fact that this excuse even roamed about on twitter is nuts. and second of all, he reacted to taehyung exactly how i had expected him to. the same way he reacts to the other members (minus jimin), as in no glint, no spark, nothing from all the alleged "bottled emotions" tkkrs said would be leaking from his eyes.

i hope he reacts to more tae content, so a) yall know he didn't do it before just because he didn't want to, (and for it to be a constant reminder that he spent 90 minutes watching jimin videos under no one's request. while he watched winter bear because comments asked him to and will do so with every tae content he would watch in the future), and b) for yall to have visual proof of how he looks at taehyung compared to how he looks at jimin. since yall were SO sure he won't do it cause the love will show. well where is it? he won't spend 90 minutes watching tae content that's for sure cause as he had said before, he loses focus on things easily if he's not interested much. but whatever tae content he has watched so far (the butter MV clip, the winter bear MV) and will/might watch in the future will be telling enough about how much "love" (the romantic kind) he has for taehyung.

"i'm one of those (rare) jikookers"

Oh that's good, because I thought you might be one them...

You what though, most Taekookers don't care that you (and your ilk) want to manifest JK talking about Tae. Just as most Taekookers don't care if JK wants to spend a whole ass live on Brian.

What we care about... and I'll try and make it simple...

We care about all the private meals and trips that the guys have been on, which we only find out about months/years later.

Or that in the last 10 years we have shit tonne of moments that show how close they are, despite what the rest of the fandom says or what BH shows us.

Or that in last 12 months we've heard about them spending more time together from close friends and aquaintances, and yet JK didn't talk to the other members for weeks at a time, aside from group get togethers or Hobi's enlistment.

Oh BTW, was JK's parents at the concert last night being supportive of their son's 'Boyfriend'? Like they did for their own son the night before; the same concert that Tae's parents also attended yet their son wasn't there.

But you know what, you do you. And stop being SOOO insecure in your OWN ship, because someone who 💯believes in something doesn't need to go on to someone else's blog with an opposing viewpoint to help validate their beliefs...

[aurora-daily]

Hello there Nikol!

I notice almost 2 weeks passed since your latest post.

How are you doing? Are you all right?

And btw are there others means to contact you directly instead of this submission?

See y'a !

Hello, my dear warrior!

With this answer I'll try to answer on several questions from my askbox, as people expressed concerns about this blog being not updated for mroe than 2 weeks so far (and this ask was received 5 days ago).

I miss you all as well and thank you very much for caring for me and expressing this! It's so important to know that my work and presence are appreciated here and I absolutely mean it by saying that it gives me more mental capacity for dealing with everyday hardships and seeing a sense in this blog! <3

This whole past month was pretty challenging for me in terms of health. I had several check-ups and, fortunately, there's no big concern about my health by now, just some virus' "aftermaths".

I find it extremely difficult to find a new balance between what I'm doing now and blogging: as you might've noticed past month I started following behind the updates and Australian leg content was posted days after the gigs happened. It was truly draining to try and catch up with all of this with the background of everyday tasks I have, so that at some point I just gave it all up at once and stopped posting, apart from updating with the special messages from Aurora herself and Sigmund, as I saw this and clearly understood the importance of letting know people about misconceptions they had (I'm really sorry for both of them going through all of these hardships). I started having a social media break (without even deciding on one, it just happened like this) for dealing with exertion, and in general it's healthy to have some breaks in life to return back stronger and better! Also I had to deal with various tasks and I need to deal with even more of them until middle of May, so I might again follow behind with the AURORA news. Obviously, as for many Ukrainians, everyday updates from home do affect me and I feel really homesick and not in my own place being abroad.

I will try to catch up with the festivals updates and, if it feels alright for me, I will continue chronologically. Otherwise, I will just post only new updates and in-between will try to slowly catch up with everything missed out. Either way I will have to take my own pace until all my projects and other things are done which take me 90% of time and as much mental capacity but I have to be focused on that more than any online presence in order to secure my own professional future, so bear with me, please. And, btw, in general, if I'm not active here it means I'm not active anywhere, tbh.

So, thank you very much again for sticking with this blog! I hope it can still bring you some joy, even though it's technically not the fastest resource by now :) Hope you take care of yourself and have a magical day!

Thank you to @forrrob for the message as well, I appreciate, and, hope, times for AURORA and her band will be better ones!

This is to @zidreddin-zidron without a context:

- Nikol

[addictedtostorytelling]

Hey, aj!

I'm on my CSI/ER rewatch era hahahaha you have no idea how nostalgic it is making me feel, and having your blog posting about these two series is beyond amazing hahahah thank you so much! Btw, I really love your CSI fics, so I was wondering, have you ever thought about writing ER fics? Cause I'd totally love it 🥹

Hope you are having a nice week.

hi, anon!

thank you for your kind words!

and gotta love that late 90s, early 00s nostalgia! i'm glad to support your csi/er rewatch through gifs, haha!

believe it or not, er fanfic was actually the very first fanfic i ever wrote, back in the day—before i even knew that "fanfiction" was a thing! back in the year 2000, at thirteen years old, i was so overcome with feelings about lucy's death that i wrote this sprawling "lucy lives" au in one of my school notebooks. only later did i learn that other people wrote fic, too!

i've always wanted to update that fic (now that i'm a more mature writer) and even have some notes in a doc about how i'd do so.

i've also got a few marsan au ideas floating around in my head.

that said, i don't anticipate that i'll get around to writing those fics any time soon, as, right now, i've very much got my plate full with my csi stories, and i'm such a slow writer that it may well be a long while yet before i finish up with them enough to be ready for another project.

it's nice to know that when i do get around to them, you might have an interest in reading, though!

i appreciate the encouragement. ❤

[cupids-chamber]

is that a yanfei pfp omg, my inner and outer yanfei main loves you oh oh oh and and and also screw that dumbass ask this anon sent about yuuka THEY ARE SO INCORRECT GRRR "y'all only like yuuka because she is a girl!1!1!1!1!1!1!"

yeah no fucking shit so many of us like her because it solidifies the place of fem!yuus in the twstverse and stops dumbass people saying "hmph. its a MALE ONLY COLLEGE why do you have a female OC?? Just make a male OC???" (obviously not every person is like this and we should still appreciate masc OCs they matter just as much mwah) but we should denounce people who are so close minded.

like mannnnn that ask made me so annoyed but your response literally summarised everything i would've wanted to put into words but a bit less violent. the audacity they had to send in that dumbass ask smh like damn bitch let people enjoy a new character? so what if it's fem!yuu? like this is one of the times twst isn't being problematic but nah people still gotta have a problem with this and not the other issues (cough cough "Monsieur pyramid" cough cough)

also yuuken was actually pretty hyped up intially did that anon just sleep through an entire period of twst tumblr fandom lmao. i remember people writing so many fics and i haven't seen anyone say jack shit but the moment it's yuuka its "Nooo you're gonna project onto her waaaah!" like pls stfu we are literally just excited for a new character joining our silly fandom and becoming the subject of either a) unimaginable fluff or b) unimaginable angst smh /j

im sorry for taking my silly anger out in your askbox (ofc none of that is directed at you cause you wrote a bomb ass response to them and honestly you really put them in their place!) but that ask just annoyed me so mf much and i been thinking over my anger of it for a day and a half now

love your fics btw I get so mf excited when you post EJFHHEJD I hope you're having a lovely day mwah mwah, feel free to ignore this ask too no pressure 💓

(_____)

NO BECAUSE I HELD MYSELF BACK, I say a lot of shit when I'm mad so it's better I hold myself back in these scenarios. But that's true, like search the Yuuken x reader tag and you'll find a sum of fanfic's, if you go to the yuuka x reader tag.. It's just me!

Sure Yuuka's hyped up, but like you said a decent chunk of it was due to the fact that her existence makes it so no one can attack fem oc's. And yeah a whole other part of the fandom simped for her, but you have got to understand that majority of the twisted wonderland fandom from my experience is homosexual.

Like I know a decent few lesbians, who write twst fanfic, so it's like not much of a shock that people simp for her a lot. And anon has to realize that fanfiction was created so you can self insert yourself in a scenario.

Like making that comment on a fanfic blog, was really fucking stupid ngl. And it seemed misogynistic from my perspective, ngl. I didn't say it because in my humble opinion that might've been "taking it too far"

Anyways, thank you for sharing your opinion, (And it's ok to rant to me as long as your not being rude abt anything) AND THANK YOU FOR ENJOYING MY WORK <3 And abt Yanfei, I've been growing her! I may main her one she gets to lvl 90!

[alivegirlmari]

which skamiverse character do you think would fit in best with the Yellowjackets?

OKAY INSANE QUESTION. had to spend all weekend thinking. idk whether you meant who would best fit as in like, who would be friends with the team?? or who would just generally exist in the yj universe?? so i'm doing a bit of everything <3 long as fuck so under a read more.

mailin is, i believe, the only canon girl soccer player, so the most boring superficial answer ofc is that mailin is the best fit. however:

nora m. and lottie would be a bittersweet type of almost, i think, if they were ever in a group project together. one time everyone bails on a meeting so lottie is like let's ditch the library come over to mine my parents are out. at some point they pause for a break and have a drink (lottie offers something alcoholic, nora declines, lottie doesn't question further but Knows something is up and grabs them both sodas). i don't think they'd be completely honest about their respective mental illnesses or family situations, ofc, but there'd be a shared, quiet understanding borne from a few anecdotes and the implications underlining them. it's nice to be able to breathe for a few hours, to admit the depth of your loneliness and momentarily allow yourself to cast it away. at one point, lottie puts on some music. they dance and laugh and let themselves be teen girls before lottie's parents come home. i think they'd say hi to each other in the halls, and nora would cheer when lottie scores a goal (the cashqueens go to mailin's games), but i just can't see them - for multiple, complex reasons - becoming besties. or at least, not publicly? i think it's one of those 'we'll have the magic of that night and i'll always be grateful for it' dynamics. fuck i actually want a fic of this now lmao.

in many ways shauna/jeff/jackie is just a parallel universe eva/jonas/ingrid situation. so i think shauna would be friendly at school with some of the evas (i'm thinking og eva and megan, not an eva but she'd also like liv imo), but they'd never quite click, either. shauna recognizes something in them she doesn't like - or, she can't recognize herself at all bc in her mind her situation is worse. but they'd share notes sometimes.

rip javi you would've LOVED being a tiny big brother to umut inci <3 there's a world where javi, wanting to become closer to his dad (or perhaps forced to go with him? similar to how he and travis go on the nationals trip) goes to mr martinez's games & training sessions and sees the u12 boys team warming up first and talks to the sullen kid kicking balls really hard. tfw you love your elder sibling but things are hard and neither of you really has the language to express it all.

constantin and randy. obviously. they have drinking competitions at parties; constantin eventually hates randy for not being an alpha male like him. unforch it is the 90s and randy does not have the emotional intelligence to recognize constantin is an alcoholic spiraling. (was that plot like...ever addressed?)

zoe m. and mari besties, spiritual sisters, and soulmates every friday and saturday night. berlin slash wiskayok you are NOT ready. but i don't think zoe is as bitchy as mari is. or as smart, tbh? mari would def hate the instas's s5 stunts. it'd be a very intense, fiery, party-focused short-lived friendship. a 24/7 drunk girl in the bathroom vibe. always about to collapse but absolutely beautiful while it lasts. pre-s2 cris would also love both zoe and mari btw.

yara and tai are the resident It girls who run things bts. i'm assuming tai did multiple extracurriculars. she meets yara, class president, overseer of all, at one of them. they immediately just get each other's vibe and have the 'can work in silent tandem and get everything done in ten mins OR will spend an hour giggling' type of friendship. yara faux-casually lets slip that she's bi once. does she already know tai's closeted and wants to make her feel a little less alone, or is she just hoping she is, desperate to know she's not reading too much into it, wanting to feel a little less alone herself? (tai freaks out regardless. they make up, eventually. yara becomes the world's first tai/van shipper. they smile at each other, a little wistfully, across the room and over the crowd at parties.)

tai would think redouane was a bit of a class clown at first, but she'd see him on the other side of the gym sometimes, always working out, playing with the younger students, putting away equipment correctly, and she'd come to respect him. van would LOVE his lil films. he'd be on the yearbook committee and make sure to take really good photos of van for the yj page, and give her the outtakes, and they'd talk Cinema. bilal comes along once and he and van invent the Just A Goofy Little Guy Convention. but i also think they recognize something in the other - a desire for More from life, but a situation beyond their control that may not allow for it - and maybe they wouldn't talk about it, but she'd sneak him movies for zak and he'd sew her something to pin on her jersey.

pre-s6 lola would love pre-crash nat in the sense that they'd both skip classes to smoke behind the school. unforch lola would rather die than exercise so she also thinks she's better than nat bc she's not an athlete. max also likes pre-crash nat for her bisexual smoker swag.

nobody hates this more than me but tiff is v mistycoded like her first response to being rightfully slapped in the face is to fake a broken neck with a brace to make people feel bad for her. they also only have one friend. they'd absolutely HATE each other though. s6 tiff would def bully her. s7-10 tiff doesn't, but keeps a wide berth, and offers no real apology for her past actions. moira's existence is the only thing that stops misty from putting a dead rat in tiff's locker. the second moira's 18 though? oh it's over.

(tiff is also 10000% the allie stevens of the yj universe, btw.)

some of the william remakes, mostly senne & noah, give me jeff vibes. as in the fandom loves to think they're better men than they are but if you think about it for more than two secs you're like, hold on...but didn't they once...? however alejandro IS travis and i mean this in a way complimentary towards both. alejandro & travis: guys who eventually become one of the girls. guys who love their gfs but love isn't always enough. guys and their almosts, their what ifs, etc.

lucas r loves paul's aesthetic, esp. his earring. he also loves mari. but i don't think mari loves him. tragic (misty loves him bc she loves a gay man she can put in a cage. he doesn't love her at all. less tragic.)

lucas vdh would light a cabin of girls on fire no question. he doesn't even need to know about the cannibalism to do it.

crystal is obvs those two theatre/musical kids that approach the evas in every season one. i could not tell you their names if you put a gun to my head. they might not've even been theater kids. but that's her: Very friendly, Very unable to read a room, Very much deserved better. speaking of deserving better: ava and crystal musical duo when???

jackie [handshake emoji] maya: girls who are doomed by the narrative. girls with complicated families. girls who love really hard. girls who are in love with, and have their heartbroken by, their best friend*. i actually don't think maya would like pre-crash jackie tbh. she's too normie for her. but college jackie and maya meet when jackie's roommate drags her to a campus enviro protest, and they'd become friendly, esp. when maya spots jackie hesitantly entering the lgbt students union. jackie helps maya shave her head once. they talk about femininity and gender and lesbianism and something clicks maybe they become roomies. maybe they raise a plant together. (*yes max is maya's canon bestie but s9 took everything from me debshirley are NOT taking my lola/maya besties headcanon too)

anyways um. did not mean 2 write an entire essay here. sorry for taking ages with it. lmk ur thoughts anon <33

[one-abuse-survivor]

Hi! Dissociation anon here, with a lil positive update after quite the few months:D How have you been? I hope you are doing well:>

So, I officially spend like 90% of my time 3,5 hours away from my abusers and their dysfunction while I get that education!! Med school is all nine circles of hell, btw, but in the times in which I am not sleep deprived beyond belief after having to prepare for three big tests and write five projects in three days, I am enjoying myself quite a bit! Also formaldehyde stinks like a bitch and cadavers look much grayer than you might think, but that's besides the point.

Honestly the first few months after leaving were HARD, but then again, I am the idiot who decided to unpack their own trauma without a professional therapist and with a tiny support system as soon as I could. Though to be honest, as grueling as the trauma work was, it definitely was worth it, as now, seven months in, I have much less prominent issues and am generally a thousand percent mentally healthier than I used to be. Still dissociate occasionally, though, because I guess some things never change lmao

But I've made quite a few new friends in med school and honestly that helps a lot to deal with any bad days that come with traumatic memories resurfacing, so that's neat!)

Bad thing is - the drama in the dysfunctional family system has gotten a lot worse since I left. Good thing - due to my physical absence I don't need to deal with it:D It's because of the economic crisis the country is in, you know, but I needn't worry!! There is never enough doctors, so even the newbies get snatched as early as possible (I kid you not, I literally had a "You wanna work for us when you finish med school?" Offer when I went to a clinic for a routine check up two weeks ago, and I have five more years of studying left) So, despite the general nation-wide spread of gloom, personally I'm feeling pretty good about the future, and that's definitely a first!

So like, let this be testament to anyone out there struggling to the fact that getting out of an abusive situation is completely possible, and life, in fact, can get better! So like, good luck to all of the other anons and good luck to you, as well!:D

Hi again!!!! It's so nice to hear from you, and I'm so so happy things are going well in med school! I have an irl friend who's also studying medicine in uni, so I have some idea of how nightmarish that can be 😅 I'm really glad you're enjoying yourself in between all of it despite the stress!

I can't even begin to imagine how awful it must be to unpack your trauma without professional support! The first months after I left my mother were also horrible even with help, but luckily everything started changing for the better soon afterwards. I'm so glad you're doing so much better now, and I hope things keep changing for the better for you! It's so so great to hear you've made friends and don't have to deal with your family drama anymore and the future is looking good 😊

I second this message: life can absolutely be better after abuse, even if you can't bring yourself to believe or envision that right now.

Also, thanks for asking! I'm doing well, just now recovering from Covid and trying to get back on my feet, but other than that things are looking better for me too ❤️ sending a big virtual hug!