#this guy was like personally offended i believed loki could actually see me when i interact with him it was kind of comical actually

[buildingunderstanding]

This morning I dreamt that someone recognized my Mjönir necklace and asked if I was a Norse Pagan, I told him, yes, I was and returned the question. At which point this man said, "Yeah, I am, but I don't really think the gods are how we think of them."

Naturally, I asked him to elaborate, and he basically said he believed that there was a span of time in which the Norse pantheon wasn't worshipped at all and it weakened the gods so much that they couldn't see us, even when present with us and that's why "they're just energies, they can't fully manifest yet". Apparently, my facial reaction spoke volumes because he got an attitude as was like, "Obviously, you disagree, so tell me what you think."

So I told him, I knew the gods could, in fact, see us. And when he cut me off with some snotty remark about the belief of the Christian God being omnipresent and omniscient, I admitted that yes, I am working on unpacking a lot of Christian beliefs, but, "I know the gods can see us because when I was doing research on Loki, and upon reading about how he stole a bloodstone from someone, he also stole one of mine. And it'd be really hard to steal the same crystal twice if he couldn't see us."

This guy kind of just stared at me for a moment before I shrugged and added, "Also I don't think they were ever not worshipped. Even if they we ere worshipped in secret, they've always been held in honor to someone."

[amomentsescape]

A/N: I thought it would be fun to write up a random oneshot. I wanted to base it around a character I haven’t gotten to write for yet, and with all of the Marvel shows being rolled out, this seemed pretty fitting. Enjoy!

(Fun fact: This was supposed to be an April Fool’s Day piece, but it ended up taking a completely different turn).

Synopsis: Loki’s attempt on hiding his ever growing feelings only seems to bring more pain.

You and Me (Loki Laufeyson x Reader)

It only took him six months to realize that maybe you were an exception to what he once thought was pure hatred for mankind.

Loki had found himself in such an odd feeling. You were kind to him, and not just in the way that others tried to be.

You genuinely liked being around him, not that he’d ever believe it himself.

Why would you even give him the light of day?

His past was something that he couldn’t outrun. Even now, he still struggled to see any good in himself. The only time he actually felt like maybe there was more to him than just pain was when he was beside you.

Your soft eyes always looked up to him while he spoke, and it made him feel validated. Your sweet smile and laughs offered a moment of peace when all that spun in his mind was chaos.

But he never wanted this to happen.

Loki tried so hard to ignore the inevitable. Because deep down, the moment you walked up to him with a small quirk of your brow, he knew he was gone.

You weren’t like the other humans. You were bubbly, yet mature. You didn’t run up to him and bombard his silence with questions or accusations. You even made him feel like he was more than just his brother’s shadow.

With you, he was something. And God, did that feel good.

He had been trying to think of what to do for days now. Of course, his first thought was that this would never work out.

You deserved so, so much. And there was no way that he could be what you needed.

His cold heart would fizzle out your light, he was sure of it.

And whether he was aware of it or not, your conversations soon began to shorten. His teasing eye rolls became excuses to leave for “other matters.”

It hurt. A lot. But he didn’t know why.

He was sure that his interests would fade the less he would be around you.

But little did he understand, it hurt because he was still falling for you. Over and over again he would keep falling deeper into whatever spell you had cast, and no amount of time away from you could change that.

However, you took his nervousness to be lack of caring.

He used to be the “bad guy,” of course he didn’t care about you.

He was a God, and Gods deserved to be around angels. You knew in your heart that you could never be this.

You tried your best to keep up with other tasks. That was your job after all: to help the Avengers with their missions and information.

But the work soon became foggy, and the only thing you could really feel was the sting in your gut.

Maybe he found out how you felt about him. You made it so obvious, of course. There’s no way he didn’t catch on after all this time.

It wasn’t until the first of the month that you began to question that theory.

The tall man was in the room with you, sneakily stealing glances while you read through some files that had been given to you.

Of course, you two weren’t alone together. There was no way either of you could stand that for more than a couple seconds. However, there was still a tension between you both that left the other Avengers feeling just as off as you were.

Loki took one more look at you and decided that enough was enough.

Not talking to you was almost more painful than the thought of you rejecting him.

He wasn’t one to be soft. Not at all. But something about you just sat with him, and to be honest, he was getting kind of sick of it.

With a few quick strides, he was right there, trying his best to fake one of his signature smirks.

“That file seems to be getting the best of you,” he spoke smoothly.

His voice made you shiver, but it also pissed you off a bit. Who did he think he was? God or not, he couldn’t just go up to you and act like everything was just fine.

You scoffed.

“Why does it matter? This doesn’t pertain to you,” you gestured with the documents in your hand.

Loki’s smile faltered for a bit, but he wasn’t one to let his worries show.

“A bit feisty today, aren’t we?”

He leaned in a bit closer to you and without a second thought, you slammed the file onto the desk and stormed out of the room.

Loki froze for a second, stunned.

That definitely was not the reaction he was expecting from you.

He tilted his head a bit as he thought about what to do.

This was what he wanted right? This was the rejection he had been expecting after all. However, something about that just didn’t seem right.

It took him all of 30 seconds to walk out the same door and turn to see you making your way down the hall.

You tried your best to put distance between you two, but it was no use. He was behind you in a snap.

“Have I offended you?”

You let out a laugh at this.

“What do you think, Loki?”

You spun around and looked at his face, only to be met with something off.

His smile was still there, but it was clear that it was a cover up.

It’s almost impossible to hide sadness in his eyes.

The way his stare met yours forced you to calm down immediately. And you hated yourself by how easy he sent your guard down. It was so unfair.

“I would like to know what I did to upset you,” he responded, his voice clearly softer than it was before.

You felt your face drop.

“What you did? You went from being my best friend to having nothing to do with me. You just ignored me without telling me why.”

Loki could sense the tightness in his chest at your words. He never felt like he had a true friend before. And although you referring to him as this made him happy, there was a part of him that broke at the same time. Would he forever just be your best friend?

He hesitated for a moment more.

And then he sighed, his normal stature dissipating quickly.

“You wouldn’t understand.”

You raised your brows at him in disbelief.

“Try me.”

His gaze fell to the ground as he felt a panic rush through him.

He never planned on telling you what he had known for weeks. And he certainly wasn’t about to let it out now. Especially in these conditions.

“Pardon me,” he spoke suddenly.

He turned swiftly and began to walk back down the hall.

He didn’t want it to be like this.

You opened your mouth to say something, but no sound came out.

Instead, you decided that your only choice was to get an explanation before he just ran off. If you couldn’t run from it, then neither could he.

You sprinted after him and grabbed his arm, forcing him to turn back to you.

“No,” you stated clearly.

“No?”

“No!” you crossed your arms. “You’re not leaving without giving me an explanation. I at least deserve that.”

Loki rolled his eyes in attempt to play it cool.

“I do not think it’s necessary to explain anything.”

He tried to turn around again, but you were quick to just pull him back around, visibly closer this time.

“Don’t you dare,” you challenged. “Look. I don’t care if you never want to speak to me again. But I at least want to know what changed.”

Loki felt the same tightening in his chest again.

“That is not what I want,” he said in a quieter tone. You could barely hear it.

“What?”

“I do not enjoy being away from you.”

You stood there, a bit stunned. Loki didn’t even know what to say then. He hadn’t expected that to slip out like it did.

This moment of confusion was quickly flooded over with more frustration however.

“You sure don’t act like it then.”

He remained silent at this, and it only drew you on.

“Oh, cat got your tongue like usual? Not surprised. While you’re at it, why don’t you just disappear completely? It would feel just the same at this point!”

He didn’t even try to hide the visible hurt on his face from you. He never wanted it to get to this. He had been trying to avoid it, but it seemed that his attempt at doing so only drove things to be worse.

“Is that... what you want, (Y/N)?”

God. How could he make even the most melancholic sound of your name into the sweetest melody?

You shook your head.

“No. Of course it’s not. You’re the one person here who makes me feel listened to, like I’m not actually alone,” you sighed. “I don’t feel like this with anyone but you.”

There was a moment of silence as Loki took in what you said. Did you actually mean this?

In that deafening moment, you felt embarrassed. You never intended on telling him how you felt, and now you were just letting it all spill out.

You stared up at him for a moment as his eyebrows knitted together, his gaze focusing on the ground by your feet.

You couldn’t take it any longer. You knew what he was going to say, and you weren’t ready for the heartbreak right then.

You pushed yourself past him.

Now it was your turn to try and get as far away from the situation as possible.

And it hurt.

It all hurt so much. Everyone warned you about this man, and yet you still got attached somehow.

You could feel the warmth build behind your eyes, and it wasn’t long until the tears began to drip along your cheeks.

As you tried to wipe them away, his voice down the hall made you freeze.

“I think I might love you.”

You swore your heart stopped beating. There was no way this was actually happening; this had to be some kind of sick joke.

The footsteps grew louder as he approached you slowly, not wanting to stress you even more than you already were.

Your response was a sniffle, followed by the gentle turn of your head.

“What?”

You could hear his deep sigh from behind you.

“I was being honest with you. I hate myself for avoiding you, but I just didn’t understand what was occurring,” he paused briefly. “You changed everything for me.”

Your breath caught in your throat.

How do you even begin to reply to this?

Loki took a couple more steps as you contemplated what to do.

Instead of speaking, you turned and reached for his hand as you felt his cold fingers hesitantly curl around your own. His breathing got a bit deeper, and his eyes never left yours.

“Tell me what this means,” he spoke again, his voice dissolving into a whisper.

Your mind ceased any noise, and you realized in that moment that everything made sense. 

He was never really the bad guy. Every perception of him was just twisted to the point that even he started to believe it.

But whatever this was between you two had you wanting nothing more than the God of Mischief himself.

“Us,” you softened, pulling him closer to you. “It’s us.”

[isoldmysoultojonahclemence]

hello! I was wondering if u could make a summary of all the suitors' flaws n how Jonah would react to them

I would be more than happy to!

SPOILERS BELOW THE CUT

Ray: his main flaw is his willingness to trust others that are close to him. That doesn’t really sound like a flaw, but in Seth’s route, even though he knew that there was a spy, he still refused to believe that his one of his friends could’ve betrayed him. That’s super nice of him as a friend, but I feel like Jonah wouldn’t consider it as a good trait for a King.

Sirius: he has the physical inability to express his feelings properly. Like, in his own route, he barely ever said “I love you” to MC, and I feel like he’s trying really hard to fit into the “mature and stoic guy” category. Jonah kinda struggles with the same things (can’t talk about feelings + tries to be cool), but I don’t think he’d appreciate them in someone else. 

Luka: he’s unwilling to change his own perceptions. For example, in his own route, one of the big things he struggle with is feeling unimportant because ppl don’t need him. That’s not actually true, bc he’s the Jack of Spades now and an entire territory is depending on him, but he’s so stuck in his own idea of himself that he can’t even see it in another way until MC comes along. He also applies this to Jonah, and strongly believes that Jonah abandoned him when Jonah was training to become Queen. I don’t know if Jonah will understand why Luka acts likes this, but he’s always going to be sad when his beloved little brother detests him.

Fenrir: he’s way too obsessed with fights. Look, I know that his description is “a battle-crazy gun maniac” and he uses magically modified guns and he doesn’t mean any harm by liking to fight bc he’s a super active guy, it’s still kinda unsettling (also bc I can’t actually think of any other character flaws bc Fenrir is a good boi). Jonah would definitely find this behavior untasteful, especially since Fenrir also comes from a good family.

Seth: probably how manipulative he is. In his own route, his mission is to “seduce” MC into joining the Magic Tower (remind you of anyone else???), and he succeeds in making MC fall in love, like, 10 parts in. He also fell in love with MC along the way, but he lured her with his body XDD. Jonah probably disapproves of some of his methods, but he can’t complain too much because he kinda did the same thing.

Lancelot: he’s too self-sacrificing for his own good. I mean, when Amon became a threat, instead of telling everyone else about it, he chooses to shoulder the burden himself. I can understand that he’s trying to spare those that he cares about, but he should know that the others aren’t exactly weak and fragile. Jonah would be super frustrated by this (like in part 23 of his own route), and he’ll try to help his King in whatever way he can.

Edgar: his shadiness oof. Like, at first you think that he can be trusted, and then you think that he can’t, but in the end you find out you actually can. He’s like an inverted oreo: white on the outside, black on the inside, but actually still white deep down inside. Being the honest person he is, Jonah probably struggled with Edgar’s personality at first. But they’ve known each other since they were children so Jonah probably got used to it over time.

Zero: you know what? After mulling over this for ages, I can’t actually think of any of Zero’s flaws. He’s literally the goodest boi in Ikerev.  

Kyle: his insensitivity to others’ emotions. He cannot read the atmosphere most times and he’s also one of the most emotionally clumsy people in the game (afsdfdf he’s adorable). However, Jonah is the type of person who needs to be handled with care, since he’s not the most emotionally able person ever. It would’ve definitely rubbed Jonah the wrong way at first, but just like how it was with Edgar, Jonah probably got used to it over time.

Harr: his unfrienliness probably. He’s literally the nicest person once you get to know him, but the emphasis is on once you get to know him. Unfortunately, not a lot of people have that privilege, and this is even before he became the infamous Joker. He’s just naturally introverted and aloof. Actually, pre-Joker!Harr reminded me of Jonah, because they’re equally tsundere and bad with expressing their feelings. Apparently Harr and Jonah didn’t get along great tho, so maybe Jonah doesn’t like to see his own personality reflected in others.

Loki: he’s a bit too clingy and has a tiny bit of yandere-ish tendencies (though I wouldn’t consider him as a yandere). Jonah would understand the clinginess to those he cares about (he’s the cling of hearts for a reason guys), and he could probably understand Loki’s desire to hold on tightly to people that are important to him.

Blanc: he’s a jerk because he’s only giving us glimpses of his backstory without any clarification and it makes me want to tear my hair out. Jonah is gonna march up to Cybird HQ and demand a route for Blanc.

Oliver: in Ikerev TW, one of his descriptions was “毒舌” and it literally means “poisonous tongue,” which describes Oliver pretty well. I get that some people are pretty attracted by his quick wit, but generally speaking, insulting someone every other sentence isn’t exactly a good habit to have. But like, just imagine Oliver and Jonah getting into an argument. Idek who’s gonna win.

NOTE: I don't really know that much about the next three suitors (Mousse, Dean, and Dalim), so I'll have to make my best guess about their flaws. If their route comes out (goodness knows when that'll be), I'll come back and see if I've got anything wrong!

Mousse: definitely his sleepiness and tendency to fall asleep in places other than his bedroom. I totally understand the desire to sleep all day every day, but I can see why it’d be super annoying. At any rate, Jonah certainly seems to think so, since he abhors laziness and Mousse is pretty much the epitome of laziness (unless it comes down to the things that he like, and then he turns super energetic).

Dean: his cruel and unusual ways of punishment that’s referenced many times throughout the series??? I don’t know much about him tbh (sorry to all the Dean stans!!!). Jonah has never complained about it (or even mentioned Dean at all), but he must’ve been Jonah’s teacher during some point in the Ikerev universe, especially considering that Jonah and Harr were in the same grade and Dean makes an appearance in Harr’s Class Companions event route.

Dalim: probably that he’s overly-dedicated to those he’s loyal to. Dalim knows that Amon is not a good person and what he’s doing is very wrong, but he still does Amon’s bidding because he is a firm believer in Amon supremacy. However, he has tried to save Cradle on multiple occasions, so I guess that makes up for it. In fact, I think that Jonah would actually appreciate this flaw, because he’s just as dedicated to Lancelot as Dalim is to Amon, and they both tried to intervene when they believed that their King/Lord was up to something bad.

THIS FOLLOWING PART IS FROM @theboredhawk!!!

You could also say that one of Dean's more obvious flaws is that he's very blunt. While he's a smooth talker when it's convenient for him, more often than not he doesn't sugar coat his words when he's pointing out other people's flaws.He says it like it is. This might lead to Jonah being offended on more than one occasion. On the other hand, i don't think Jonah likes Dalim's debauchery. He might think that he fools around too much. He might've chastised him at some point, but gave up when he saw that he wasn't listening. Dalim is hard to tame. There were a few times when he didn't listen to Amon's orders and he also did that thing at the end of Ray's ttlg route which proved that he's not as loyal to his lord as he seems.

BONUS:

Jonah: Jonah literally stated himself that he knows how reckless and stubborn he is, but he doesn’t have any intentions of changing that. And I just. That’s actually such a strong thing to do??? He legit accepts himself as he is without trying to change anything about the way he is. Self-acceptance level 10/10.

[shyficwriter]

Who's Tougher part 2

Guardians of the Galaxy fanfic | Reader x Guardians (With Yondu and Kraglin!) Guest starring Thor

Summary: So the Guardians now know you aren't Terran. That makes things awkward, but things only get more awkward when they find out what you are.

Author’s Note: Part 1 here.

Word Count: 3,337

"Any chance we can just forget that happened?" you ask, nervously chuckling as you wring your hands. "I promise I'll fix that-" you stand up and look again at the ruined metal that was once the arm of a chair, "or uh... replace it?" You grin hopefully, though you were sure it came out more like a grimace.

"No! Of course we're not just gonna forget that happened!" Peter cried, his face a mix of startled amazement and incredulity, like he couldn't quite believe what he had just witnessed from his friend. "Are you crazy!? What are you!?"

You shrank back a bit, his words stung a little, whether he intended them to or not. "Ok, I had a feeling that wouldn't fly..." Your gaze dropped to the table. What were you? You were his friend... right?

"Why did you lie?" Gamora asked, not nearly as harshly as Peter, but it hurt more regardless.

You furrow your brows as you look up to her, insulted. "Hey! I didn't lie!"

"You said you was from Terra." Kraglin interjected. "An' you ain't a Terran. Think that counts as lyin'." He sat back in his chair, eyeing you. Yondu still stood next to him, doing the same.

Drax, still sat in his chair but removing his electrode leads, then threw in a, "Friends shouldn't lie," with Groot nodding in agreement as well as Mantis, but you ignored them.

"I was born there- Pretty sure that counts as 'being from' someplace." You suppressed the urge to call him a jerk and crossed your arms in front of you with a hurt expression. "Not my fault you filled in the blanks yourselves."

Yondu spoke up now. "Ya didn't exactly tell us otherwise, either." He doesn't sound angry or as confused or suspicious like the others, his statement was more matter-of-fact. You had been with the team longer than he had, but in the time that he had known you, you had never given an inclining that you were anything other than a normal Terran like Quill- or well, maybe that's a bad example... but now that Ego is dead that probably makes him a normal Terran, right?

You merely responded to him with, "You didn't ask." You had a feeling that likely wouldn't go over well, but you were too busy being offended for being called a liar to give it much thought before it was out of your mouth.

Peter made noises that couldn't be classified as words as he waved his hands around in exasperation. "Wha- You- HOW- Were we really just supposed to ask, 'Hey, do you have any cool or weird powers you haven't told us about? Like glowing eyes or the ability to crush metal with your bare freaking hands?!'"

You don't respond, just stare off into a corner.

"I think you better start talking. Or, ya know, we can always hook you back up to this thing you hated so much until you spill the goods." Rocket said with a chuckle, holding up what you now mentally dubbed as a torture device. You couldn't quite tell if he was trying to lighten the mood or not, but either way it didn't work.

You blush and instinctively wrap your arms protectively around your middle. "You don't have to be mean about it..." you say, not making eye contact with anyone.

"Ok," says Gamora, trying to calm the situation down, holding her hands up in a placating gesture. "I think what Peter means is why didn't you say anything? Why didn't you feel you could trust us?"

That hurt. You didn't want them to think you thought so little of them. You sigh, "It's not like that. I just- I dunno."

"You don't know?" Gamora repeated, an eyebrow raised.

"Look, I'm sorry. Ok? It's not that I didn't trust you, I trust you guys with my life! I do! I- I just couldn't. I don't have a better answer." You did actually, but it was too complicated. You wanted to melt into the floor.

"Hey, I got a question." Kraglin spoke back up when everyone else seemed to be at a loss for words. "'While back, when Thor was here, he told you he thought ya looked familiar, and you got all nervous-like when you told him he was mistaken. Now, at the time I thought you was just crushin' on him mighty hard, but now you've got me thinking maybe you didn't wanna be recognized."

You cringed. You knew what he was referring to. When Thor had briefly been with the Guardians he came up to you, stating he swore he knew you from somewhere. You had replied that you merely had 'one of those faces' and that he was mistaking you for someone else before scurrying off to talk to Gamora.

You had lied.

Kraglin continued. "Cuz now that I think about it, you're kinda like him... Kinda like a-"

You knew what he was about to say, and you hated it. "Please don't-"

He finished the sentence anyway, "-god."

Something seemed to click for the rest of the team and they now stared at you wide-eyed. Little Groot's mouth dropped open, while Mantis covered hers. Peter and Gamora exchanged stunned glances with Drax. Yondu and Rocket each raised an eyebrow while Kraglin just looked at you expectantly for an answer.

You pinched the bridge of your nose. "Please don't call me that."

Peter stared at you. "You're a god?!" All this time... All this freaking time one of his friends had been a god and never told him?? Were you a celestial like Ego? Were you another Asgardian like Thor? He had so many questions, but couldn't verbalize any of them in his shock.

You shoot Kraglin a pained look. "Dammit! You've gone and made it all weird!" You turn back to Peter. "No! I'm not a god!" This seemed to relax the others some, but not much. Yeah, you seemed cool, but why hide you could do what you just did to the chair? What else were you hiding?

"But ya are, aren't ya? Like Thor, I mean." Kraglin pressed.

You scrambled for the right words. "I- No- Well, not exactly..." You hated this. Everything was so simple ten minutes ago, couldn't you just go back to that?

"I'm calling him." Rocket says, pulling out his media pad and beginning to dial.

"Wait! No no no no no!" you exclaim, stepping forward with your hands raised. You realized you shouldn't have done that, it looked suspicious as hell, but you panicked.

Rocket looked up at you, smirking, "Why? Is it because he'll recognize you and confirm you're like him? Or... wait..." He thought for a second. "Are you some kind of fugitive?"

"No!" you say, wincing. "I mean-" You brush a hand over your face. "Ok. I did know him," you admitted, making Kraglin laugh out a "Knew it!" You shoot him a look before returning to Rocket. "I'm not a god- or a fugitive- I would just rather he -uh- didn't remember me." Truthfully, it wasn't Thor you were worried about, it was his brother, and if Thor remembered you there was a chance he'd bring it up to Loki. But, that was another story for another day. Or never. Never was good.

The rest of the team gave you a weird look for a moment. Eventually Gamora asked suspiciously, "Why?" You being vague wasn't exactly helping you right now, but you couldn't help it.

"Just... personal reasons." you reply, hoping it would be enough.

Spoiler: it wasn't.

"Yeah, no, I'm calling him." Rocket said, he had already dialed and it was ringing. If there was one thing Rocket liked, it was uncovering other people's secrets, usually to hold them over there heads, and Thor was clearly a lead to figuring out yours.

Your eyes went wide in panic again and you tried to stop him, but before you could do anything Thor's face appeared in the screen and you muttered an, "Aw, fuck."

"Rabbit! Hi! It's been a bit, what brings you to call me?" Thor said cheerfully. "And everyone else is there, too! Hello!"

Mantis waved cutely at the screen and the others verbalized their greetings. Well, aside from Yondu and Kraglin, who just gave a nod to be polite.

"Hey Thor," Rocket started, "I was hoping you could settle something. You remember our friend here, right?" He turned the screen to you and you quickly changed your expression from exasperated pleading as you mouthed the word "No!" over and over with a wave of your hands into to a forced smile as you waved and awkwardly said "Hi, Thor..."

Rocket grinned, taking glee in watching you squirm. Yes, partially because he was a dick, but also because he was actually offended that you, his pranking buddy, had kept something like this from him. It hurt, and this was how he was choosing to deal with that.

"You know, I thought I did, but I was told it was a misunderstanding... although..." Thor said thoughtfully, squinting his eyes.

Your stomach sank.

Thors face lit up. "Oh yes! I knew I recognized you! You were one of mine and Loki's playmates when Mother and Father would visit old friends on Earth!"

You winced but retained your forced smile, but it immediately fell with what he said next.

"You were the lovely Nephilim girl that Loki would get into so much trouble with!" Thor laughed heartily. "My, it's been a long time. I don't really remember why we didn't keep in touch..."

Your eyes grew wide, you didn't expect him to just blurt out what you were right there and then. Part of you had still been naive enough to think it could have been avoided altogether. However, you didn't have much time to dwell on it before the other shoe dropped. Your stomach jumped into your throat when he asked, "Loki's around here somewhere... Would you like me to fetch him?"

"No!" you say, a little too loudly, before trying to cover, "No, that's fine Thor. I- I don't think that's the best idea!"

Thor didn't hear you, he was already too busy calling for Loki.

The others could see you were real nervous about Thor putting Loki on the call. Yondu and Kraglin exchanged a look that was a mix of suspicion and amusement. It was evident now you had been telling the truth about not being a fugitive, but why were you so nervous? Was this Loki fella an ex-boyfriend or something? And what even was a Nephlilim?

The question on Gamora's mind was why were you avoiding what were apparently your childhood friends if they didn't seem to be angry with you?

Rocket just grinned a shit-eating grin, clearly thinking he was about to see something very funny -- meaning completely embarrassing for you-- happen.

He wouldn't get to see that happen, however, because with a quick, "Goodbye, Thor!" you lunged forward to push the button that would end the call just before Rocket could pull away.

"Hey!" Rocket complained, "You know I can just call him back, right?"

"Later, Rat." Yondu said, looking at you inquisitively. "He said ya were a Nephilim, what's that?" He didn't think you were dangerous from what he'd seen of you before today. You were about as damn goofy as Peter was... but what if that had been a cover this whole time? He did just see you destroy that chair arm without even realizing, like it was nothing. Why else would you have hidden who/what you were from the team? He had to be cautious.

Peter spoke up. "I've heard of those. My grandparents made me go to Sunday school. It's like the baby of an angel and a human... and they're like... super powerful... but- but you're not supposed to be real!" he said, amazement in his eyes. "I thought that was all religious bullcrap! Does this mean that God, like thee God is real??" He was asking out of utter disbelief rather than anything, having never actually believed in any of that stuff, especially after being taken by Yondu when he was a boy.

You cringed so hard. "Peter please. You're being so embarrassing right now!" You covered your face before letting your hands fall again. The rest of the team just kind of stared at each other, not really sure what to do with all this information. "Look, if the dude exists, I've never met him, and that Terran religion stuff made things so awkward for people like me. And you wonder why I didn't tell!"

Now Peter looked a little sorry, and to your surprise he actually apologized. "Look, ok, I'm sorry. You're right, but can you blame us?"

Your shoulders fell and you sighed, breaking your gaze from his. "I get it, I do. And I'm sorry I didn't tell you, but why does it matter what I am? I'm still me. I'm still the same person."

Drax spoke up for the first time in a while, standing up from his chair to stand with you as he patted you on the shoulder. "This small neffle-thing is right. We are family. It shouldn't matter what anyone is."

You awkwardly pat his hand on your shoulder, honestly not expecting the sudden solidarity. "Thanks, buddy."

"I do have a question though." he added, removing his hand.

You dropped your head, muttering, "Dammit."

"Peter said your kind are very powerful, does that mean this whole time you've been holding back on missions?"

The realization of what Drax had asked put strange expressions on half the faces of your team. The kinda look that says, "Hey! You've been holding out on us! What the hell?!" Rocket nearly verbalized this sentiment as such with a, "Hey! He's right! How many jobs could we have just been in and out of with a snap of your fingers?! Rude, is what that is."

"Ok, first off, I can't make anything happen 'with the snap of my fingers,' ok? I just want to make that clear," you scolded. Your cheeks began to grow hot as you continued, "and secondly... um... none."

"None!? Quill just said you were some super powerful being, and you're really gonna tell us that none of your powers could have helped us on any of those missions?" Rocket stood staring at you in disbelief, his hands on his hips in a way that would have been super adorable if you weren't so uncomfortable right now.

"Yeah, I'm not exactly great at... controlling them." you admitted, rubbing your arm.

"You can't control them?" Gamora asked, sounding a bit surprised, and maybe a little sympathetic too.

"No." You admitted again, begrudgingly. You saw they were looking at you like they wanted some sort of explanation, so you sighed before making wildish gestures with your hands at the ruined chair arm, saying sarcastically, "Exhibit A! I broke the damn chair just because the damn trash panda... tickled me too hard with his electrocution-torture- thingy..." your sentence trailed off in a mix of bitterness and embarrassment, your face flushed a decent shade of scarlet as you crossed your arms. "You know, if you ask me this is all his fault. We wouldn't be having this conversation if it weren't for him."

"You can't blame me! It was supposed to hurt! Not my fault you didn't tell us you're some weird-god thing." Rocket then proceeded to mock you. "oH No! NoT AN elEcTRiC SHOCK! IT TiCkLES TOO mUcH! i'm GOnnA bEg ROCkEt FOR MERCY And BreAK A ChAIR BeCAUsE eVEn ThOUgh I'm a GOD i'm StiLL a Big bABy!"

"I hate you," you say flatly, glaring at him before looking up at the ceiling in frustration as you said, "and stop calling me a god, I'm not a god!"

The sound of laughter brought your gaze back to the team. It was Rocket, of course. Yondu and Kraglin were also snickering, mostly due to your pouty expression, but Rocket was definitely the loudest. You frowned. "It's not funny."

"The hell if it ain't," Yondu laughed. Everyone had been so surprised by what you had done to the chair that they actually had forgotten what had made you do it in the first place.

"Aw, don't give us that long face," Kraglin teased, still laughing. "It could've been worse. Getting tickled til ya break a chair is a whole lot less embarrasin' than gettin' tickled til yer pissin' yer pants."

You gave Kraglin a scandalized look as his comment earned snickers from more of the team. He might have been trying to make you feel better, but he had actually only embarrassed you more. The only one not actually laughing was Gamora, and she looked like she was going to tell the others off for you, but she was cut off by Rocket.

"Oh cheer up, or I'll do it again!" Rocket laughed, giving you a mischievous look. "That'll teach you to blame me! If you and Quill hadn't been bickering all the time I wouldn't have made this thing to shut you up!"

You glared at him. "Threaten me with that again and I'm taking it," you warned.

To your surprise, Yondu took that moment and actually snatched the device from Rocket himself. This surprised Rocket too, and he looked up at Yondu with a dejected, "Hey!"

"Sorry there, Rat, but we don't need anymore broken chairs." He chuckled and slipped you a wink as he slipped the device into one of the inside pockets of his duster. He might have been making a joke at your expense as he did it, but you were grateful for the gesture nonetheless. You didn't need Rocket threatening you with it every time he wanted something from you- and you know he would have. As did Yondu, hence why he snatched it. You may have been a goofy little shit like Peter, and you may have hidden powers (and don't get him wrong, he was still going to keep an eye on you), but he still liked ya well enough to save you from a sadistic raccoon, for now.

Rocket pouted, muttering something about "Never let me have any fun!" as he collected Groot and sulked off.

You smiled at Yondu in return, glad the mood had been somewhat lifted, even if it was at your own expense. After a beat you look back to Peter. "Are we good?" you asked, with so much more meaning behind those three words than just asking if you two were good. Peter could see that you were desperately asking not only for forgiveness, but acceptance. There was thinly veiled fear and nervousness in your eyes that he might cast you out for keeping this secret from the team, from him. It made him feel a little guilty.

He looked at you softly. "Yeah. I mean, I still have a lot of questions, but yeah, we're good."

"I guess that's fair," you say, a relieved grin cracking your face. "But another day, ok? It's late and I'm tired." With that you excused yourself for bed, barely waiting for an acknowledgment of what you said before you were walking away, eager to just get away from this conversation for now. You did smirk a little, however, when you heard Drax ask Peter if you being a "Neffleling" meant you were the tougher one, only for Peter to sigh irritably and say, "No, Drax," and Kraglin to laugh in response and say to Peter, "Nah, I think it does," just to rile him up.

Once you were gone Kraglin spoke again, wondering out loud what had happened with Loki that made you so nervous when Rocket called Thor.

This made Peter look back and share a look with the rest of the team. Kraglin was right. You were nervous enough to hang up the phone when Thor called for Loki to join the conversation. Nervous enough to wish Thor didn't remember your face.

What had happened?

[buckysmischief]

they think my lover is strange

Loki x reader, soulmate au

Word Count: 1.4k

Summary: No wonder you didn’t find your soulmate sooner, he’s a damn god who lived in outer space.

Warnings: language, expected levels of angst topped with the right amount of fluff

AN: This is too late but it’s for @honeyvbarnes ‘s birthday challenge! I chose a soulmate au & this is my first attempt at one. I know she’s on a break but she knows it’s being uploaded and I REALLY HOPE YOU LOVE IT VI! // I listened to a lot of Halsey while writing this, this is a lil inspired :)

Masterlist

Even in a world where soulmates exist, almost ruling out any unnecessary heartbreak, you still had to work for it. Who said it was easier, anyways? Whose bright idea was it to have your soulmates name show up on your wrist? And just to make things more complicated, it wasn’t always their first name. See, fate was a funny thing.

About a year after you’re born a name would show up on your wrist, obviously the name of your soulmate, and when you found each other the letters would change from black to a new, random color. Half would get the others' first name beautifully displayed on their skin, and while that’s still pretty difficult, it wasn’t as confusing as having your soulmate's last name on you.

It was easy to find out someone’s first name, you just introduce yourself and if that’s your person, then BOOM instant love. But if you have their last name on your wrist, it wasn’t that easy. Not many people were interested in giving out their whole name to a stranger who will most likely not be their soulmate. You, unfortunately, were among the half with a .

Odinson. What kind of a name is that anyway?

You used to think that it could be easy to find your soulmate, all you’d have to do it Google the name. But when you didn’t find anything you could actually go on, you decided it was best to just let fate do its thing. Maybe taking a year to travel the world, because that’s definitely not an american name, could have been seen as taking the wheel, but you were no closer than you were before.

After college you took a job at Stark Industries working with Tony himself as his personal lab assistant. Not only did Tony give you permission to work on whatever you wanted in your free time, but it also allowed you to meet all kinds of people without having to disrupt your routine. There was no way whoever this Odinson is is a normal person, it was something you’ve always been so sure about but never could explain it to others. It wasn’t until the day after the battle of New York did you find out just how right you were.

You got a call from Tony saying you had the rest of the week off but you elected to ignore him. No way you were turning down uninterrupted lab time. Once you got into the lab you couldn’t help but notice the alien weaponry on Tony’s side, what was he planning on doing with all of it? He’d likely ask you to assist, so you’d find out eventually. You finally got to your desk and started organizing your notes and important documents.

Hours had passed and you didn’t even realize it. So when you turned around to found a strange muscular man studying you, you freaked the fuck out. “Oh my GOD you can’t just do that! Who are you!?” you yelled at the stranger.

His demeanor never changed, “My name is Thor O-” he stopped himself. “I’m a friend of Stark.”

He wasn’t meant to bring Loki back for another day or so, Tony wanted to ask some questions and run a few tests, all which Thor agreed to. So while Tony was attempting to know Loki better, he decided he’d explore the tower. What he didn’t expect to find was to see you through the glass, reading so intently he was positive you never blinked. If anyone asked him why he originally felt compelled to talk to you, he’d tell them he was just following his gut. But when he was coming up behind you, he saw your soulmark. His name.

Only a few minutes had passed while he thought of what to do. He didn’t think for a second that he was your soulmate, he knew he wasn’t - after meeting Jane the year before both of their soulmarks turned deep red. Which could only mean one thing, you were Loki’s. He tried to recall a memory where he saw the name that belonged to his brother, but it didn’t exist. By the time Thor paid attention to those kinds of things, Loki used his magic to cover his mark.

He was just about to announce himself when you turned around and screamed. When you asked his name, he caught himself before he gave you false hope. No, he wanted you and Loki to share that moment. The moment where you told him your name and all of his walls fall, a moment that has nothing to do with being the God of Mischief or the brother of Thor. After he found out the truth behind Loki’s attack, he hoped finding you would change him into the man he was meant to be. Otherwise, why wouldn’t it read Laufeyson?

“Oh, I’m sorry.” you stood up to shake his hand. “My name is Yn, I’m Tony’s personal- wait, you fought alongside Tony right? What the hell was all that!?”

Thor thought about giving you details about his heroics against an alien army, but he had a better idea. “I have someone I want you to meet, he can explain it better.”

You followed him to the elevator and took it to the underground levels, to the floor where Tony tests some of his inventions. When the doors opened, you noticed Tony sitting in front of a man inside of a glass box, which you’d eventually learn was an Asguardian cell. If you worked anywhere else, you’d be concerned, but you trusted Tony and his process.

“Ah, Yn, you found Thor. Why am I not surprised?” he laughed, eyes never leaving the man in the chair. So when he noticed Loki’s eyes land on you after he said your name, he got curious. “Hey, Yn. This is Loki, he’s as interesting as they come. Ask him something, see if he answers for you.”

“Mmm,” you didn’t have to ask the obvious, he was obviously behind the attack. Asking him why would be smart, but this guys not from here, and you could ask him anything. “Why’d you do it.”

His eyes never left yours, and you didn’t know how that made you feel until he spoke for the first time. He smirked, “That’s not what you’re interested in, now is it, love? Ask me the question you really want, I promise it’ll be worth it.”

“What’s-” you cut yourself off. “If Loki is your first name… what’s, what’s your last name…?”

Thor and Tony didn’t miss the way you had begun to gravitate to the younger god, now close enough to touch the glass. He put his left arm against the glass, magic disappearing to show your name as he answered, “Odinson. My name is Loki Odinson.”

“Hi,” you whisper. “I’m Yn.”

Never did you think your soulmate would be anything like the man standing in front of you, he was beyond everything you knew to be possible. You spent the whole night down there getting to know him, and when Tony came in the next morning to find you both asleep next to each other with only the glass separating you, he wasn’t surprised. It still took Thor hours to convince him to let Loki out of the cell, but he did. Under the condition that the two of you were not to be alone.

When Thor opened the door, Loki took a second to thank him, that’s all the time he had before you were pulling him close to you. He picked you up and effortlessly wrapped you around him, only wishing to hold you close and breath in your scent. “I was beginning to believe I’d never find you, my love.”

“Well you did, and you brought an army.” you laugh into the crook of his neck. “My soulmate’s a big dummy.”

Thor didn’t expect Loki to be offended by the comment, not from you. No, he expected his brother to pretend to be offended, but instead laughter filled his ears. Genuine, heartfelt laughter he hadn’t heard from his brother since they were young.

He put you back down and cupped your face, “It seems you’re right, Yn.” Before you fully registered what he had said, his lips were on yours, kissing you like he needed you to breathe. Much to your disappointment, though, Loki pulled away, looking at you as if you hung each star in the galaxy.

“So, love, how do you feel about being a Queen?”

Permanent tags: @sociallyeneptbarnes @rogvewitch @saturn-aka-six @stuckonjbbarnes @superavengerpotterstar @estillion14 @sleepingspacedragon @geeksareunique @infj-slytherclaw @imsoft-barnes @piper-koko-barnes-rogers @murdermornings @distractedgemini @screaming-fridge @readeity @whatinthyworld @my-drowning-in-time @valkyriesryde @sebbbystaaan @disaffectedbarnes @buggy-blogs @hey-its-grey @pinknerdpanda @brokenthelovely @sandyclaws @death-unbecomes-you @rhymesmenagerie @actualdpshuri @sweetkingdomstarlight-blog @mushyjellybeans @https-bucky @also-fangirlinsweden @goalexis123 @missmeganrachel @sunflowersandcherry @miraclesoflove @matsumama

[mimisempai]

I love you more than I have ever found a way to say to you 1/3

Summary:

Loki would like to express his feelings to Mobius but doesn't know how to do it, he finds a sympathetic ear in Miss Minutes, without knowing that Mobius is suffering from the same problem...

Chapitre 1/3 - Chapter 2/3 - Chapitre 3/3

A little story, of love, of friendship, of two idiots in love...

https://archiveofourown.org/works/32351812

1374 words - Rating G

"Good job Loki!" Mobius smiled at him before continuing, "I'm really going to start thinking you're trying to steal my job."

Loki, once again touched by the praise more than he should, followed him with his eyes as he returned to his office.

"I can see that..."

Loki snapped out of his contemplation at the small voice of Miss Minutes who seemed to have taken up residence on his desk. He had formed a rather curious bond with the small animated clock.

"What? What can you see?" replied Loki, turning to his desk.

"That you're making eyes at him..." she smiled at him knowingly, making Loki realize that there was no need to deny it. He didn't feel like it either.

"So what? Why should I deprive myself of it?"

"Oh but don't deprive yourself for me, my little Loki, though don't you think you should tell him?" she came to sit on the edge of the desk, looking a little more serious.

"Tell him what?"

"That you love him."

"I don't -" Loki paused, because he didn't feel like denying that either. It was the truth after all.

He ran his hand through his hair and sighed.

"This is difficult."

"I know I'm not the best one to talk about feelings, but I've seen a lot of things, so why not just tell him?" asked Miss Minute gently.

Loki sighed again.

"I... I've never actually said those words to anyone, well once to my brother, but that doesn't count. It's not the same thing, obviously. And this time especially I-"

He slouched on the desk and took his head in his hands.

A few seconds later, he felt a small tap on his forearm and he looked up to see Miss Minute settling comfortably against his arm.

"I hope you're comfortable at least?" he asked a little offended to see his arm relegated to the role of chair back.

"It's not bad, but it lacks a bit of fluff, you should think about filling it up a bit, my little Loki."

"Hey, you cheeky little thing!"

"Anyway, let's not change the subject, smart ass! What were you going to say Loki?"

"This time I have everything to lose." he exhaled before continuing, "Mobius is probably, no he's definitely the best thing that ever happened to me. I'm not even sure I deserve it. In fact it's impossible for me to quantify how I feel about him."

"That my little Loki is love, it's impossible to know the width and depth of it. At least that's what I read somewhere."

"I feel like just telling her 'I love you' isn't enough. And besides I don't even know if he feels the same way about me."

He was interrupted by the sight of Miss Minutes writhing in laughter on his desk.

When she got serious again she asked him, "Seriously? It's clear to everyone how you feel about each other, believe me, if you're smitten, he's as smitten as you. You guys are anything but subtle. Mobius and Loki's devotion to each other is probably known on every time line!"

"I can't believe you're laughing at me! Watch out or I'll turn you into a pocket watch!"

"I can't help it, you're so cute when you get mad."

"You're starting to get too cheeky for my taste Mimi!"

"Admit it, you like it."

Loki pouted, not wanting to give in.

"Let's get back to the topic at hand, you say that just telling him 'I love you' isn't enough, how about you tell me why you love him?" asked Miss Minute as she resumed her seat, sitting against Loki's arm.

Loki reflected for a few seconds before he began to speak, "I think the first reason is because he challenges me to be a better version of myself.  Because from the beginning, he kept trying to make me understand that I didn't have to be what others wanted me to be. And despite the times I failed, he was able to forgive me and he continued to believe in me."

"You could be whoever, whatever you wanna be, even someone good. I mean, just in case anyone ever told you different."

"Hm I see," Miss Minutes replied, "What else?"

"He's not intimidated by me, by the entirety of who I am, by my past mistakes, he doesn't lie to me. If I screw up, he tells me, if I react badly, he tells me, but never makes me feel inferior. And in the same way he tells me when I do something right, and that's super new to me, to the point where I'm a little embarrassed at how much it makes me feel good."

"That's just because you're not used to it. Besides, there's nothing wrong with being happy knowing you're doing something right." she replied with a little wink.

"Sometimes he annoys me, because he has this know-it-all side, because he can read me. And for me who spent my time hiding, even from myself, it is sometimes heavy. I want to wipe that little smile off his face! But that's what also makes him understand me perfectly, and since it's also a first for me, well, we'll say it makes up for the annoyance."

"You've learned to compromise, bravo, I'm proud of you my little Loki." the little clock smiled at him again in a cheeky way.

"Hey!"

"So you told me about what he did for you, what he's doing for you, what else? I don't know, his appearance for example, some might say, and this is not my opinion so don't hit me, that he is far from your type physically..."

Loki looked offended and replied heatedly, "What do you mean not my type physically?"

He transformed into his frost giant appearance for a few seconds before resuming his appearance.

"What is my type physically? First of all what does that mean, what is that concept? What does it have to do with feelings?"

Miss Minute stood up again and patted his arm, "Loki, don't get upset, I told you that wasn't my opinion. We're friends, right? I like to think so. Imagine Loki, the god of mischief is friends with an animated IA in the form of a clock."

Loki cooled down a bit and smiled at her, seeing what she was getting at, before resuming more calmly this time.

"If the question is whether I am physically attracted to Mobius, and more importantly what is it about him that attracts me, I would say yes I am attracted to him. His eyes, the way they sparkle so much that they light up the rest of his face, the way his smile starts in his eyes. That smile he has only for me. And his hands, Mimi, his hands! They are so strong, any excuse to touch them or to have them touch me. They excite me and make me feel safe at the same time. And I'll let you in on a secret, I'm glad no one knows him in anything but a TVA suit, because I assure you the way the jeans fit his beautiful beh-hmph."

The little watch had jumped up to close Loki's mouth with her two little hands.

"It's okay, it's okay, I think I got it and the rest will be too much for my pure little chaste ears!"

"But it's true! I swear! It makes me want to take off those jeans every time!"

"Lokiiii! That's enough!" Miss Minutes gave him a little kick.

Loki laughed out loud.

When they had both calmed down, Miss Minutes added, "Loki, tell Mobius, tell him everything you just told me, I don't know anyone in the world who wouldn't like to hear everything you just told me."

Loki looked a little sadder and replied softly, "But what do I have to offer him? I am not a good person for him. And I'm still waiting for the day when he can't stand my kind anymore and tells me I have to leave."

"A couple of idiots, that's what I'm saying." said a female voice behind him.

"Sylvie?!"

Loki turned around, Sylvie was standing in the doorway of his office, his lover just behind her.

"Mobius?"

________

Not beta'd I hope you enjoyed it.🥰

[3vendeadimthehero]

One of a kind Loki x reader (series) Part 2

I actually was surprised by how many people seemed to be liking the first part, so I decided to go ahead with the second part. 

The moment you dropped to the ground, Loki was running to your side, eyes wide with shock. One minute you had been fine, tinkering with your suit, the next the room was shaking and you had passed out.

Others had heard the commotion and of course, the first person to run into the workshop was your father, Tony.

"Y/N!" He screamed, rushing to your side and practically pushing Loki out of the way, all he felt was rage and he wanted someone to blame. So, of course, he blamed Loki. "What the hell did you do to her?" Tony yelled, kneeling by your unconscious form and cupping your cheek.

"Y/N! Y/N! Wake up. Come on, baby. What'd he do to you?" He demanded, not like you could respond, you had fainted, you were completely unresponsive.

Loki hadn't said anything, hadn't defended himself for a moment as he just watched Tony try and get you to respond to him.

"I didn't do anything," Loki finally said after a moment.

"Yeah! I told you to stay the hell away from her. I knew letting you into the compound was a horrible idea and the moment we do, what happens. MY DAUGHTER is HURT!" He screamed, getting up from the floor and moving closer to him. His eyes were filled with rage.

"and I DIDN'T DO IT!" Loki bellowed back, feeling rage boil within him as well. If Tony wasn't careful he could start a fight he didn't want to begin.

"Oh yeah, explain the shattered glass, my tools everywhere. Clearly there was some kind of struggle, genius,"

"You be careful of what you are insinuating,"

"What that you hurt my little girl?" Tony made one flick of the wrist and part of his suit enveloped around his hand, the same hand that then gripped Loki by the throat and forced him into the wall.

"What. did. you. do. to. her?!"

It was at that moment that the rest of the avengers in the compound had all began to wake up and come down to see what the commotion was. First it was Peter, followed by Natasha, Bruce, Wanda, Steve, Bucky, and then lastly, Thor.

"Mr. Stark what's going on here," Peter's groggy voice stated as he sleepily walked into the room, rubbing his eyes. He quickly stopped at the scene before him, running over to your side where you lay unconscious.

"Woah Y/N! Woah! Guys! Y/N's in trouble! She won't wake up!" Peter yelled.

Bruce was the next to get to your side, everyone else had to fight Tony to get him to let go of Loki, who was rather offended that Tony didn't believe him about what had happened.

Loki huffed when Thor yanked Loki away from Tony and Steve and Natasha held back Tony.

"Does someone care to tell me what the hell is going on at three in the god damn morning!" Natasha snapped. "What the hell happened!?"

"Ask. him." Tony managed to garble with Steve holding him in a choke hold.

All eyes then moved to Loki, who in response rolled his eyes. "I didn't lay a hand on her. She was working on that.. and she started.. to go rigid, the room shook. She broke the glasses. And then she fainted." He told them.

Tony opened his mouth to spout out something when Bruce piped up.

"Well, she never let us examine her after HYDRA. She didn't remember what happened, Tony. I mean they did experiments on Bucky, Wanda, Pietro, who's to say they didn't do something to her too, we need to get her to the lab, do some tests,"

"You cool if I let you go, or are we going to have to pin you down again?" Steve asked Tony with a raised eyebrow, reluctantly he tapped out and he was released by the other avengers and Thor stepped out so Loki could move freely as well.

All sorts of tests were done on you, but it wasn't exactly rocket science in discovering abilities, it wasn't something that just showed up on a scanner, the only other person who seemed to understand what you were going through was Wanda, who had explained to the rest of the team how it was difficult to control abilities at first, how it could overwhelm a person.

You slept through the rest of the night and didn't wake until evening the following day. When you did, you had been alone. Your father had gone to get burger king for when you awoke, other avengers were training. You were alone save for one individual that you didn't expect to wake to. Loki.

He wasn't staring at you or anything, rather his attention was drawn to a novel that he was reading, one of your favorites.

You scanned the room for a few moments before you decided to get his attention.

"That's got a sad ending," You said, voice a little scratchy, you immediately reached for the water your dad had already left for you for when you awoke.

"Not every ending is happy," came Loki's response. He swiftly closed the book, placing it on a side table before standing and making his way over towards you. It wasn't that he cared for you, he wasn't sure he was capable or deserving of anyone caring for him back, but rather he was curious of your condition.

You, personally hated hospitals, and after being captive by HYDRA, any type of isolation or captivity made you nervous, anxious. You were already pulling at wires, taking out IV's, monitors, everything you were attached to had to go.

"I'm not sure if that is a wise decision, Y/N," your name sounded foreign on his tongue and it made you stop for just a moment. However, you're just as stubborn as your father and immediately began resuming what you were doing.

"Didn't know you even knew my name," came your snappy response. "what do you care anyways?"

You stood too soon, the type in which the room around you begins to sway, the ground moving beneath your feet and your vision begins to fill up with hazy clouds.

"Woah," You said, throwing out your hands for balance.

Loki said something snappy back to you in regards to your original comment but it went unheard by your lack of balance and before he could come out to try and help you, Tony had arrived home.

"Don't even think about it," Tony growled at Loki, making his way over to you to make sure you were indeed okay.

"You okay, you stand up too quickly? You really should have just stayed in bed until we get this figured out, Y/N," He warned.

You shook your head at him in response. "No. I'm not gonna stay in bed all day. I'm fine. I feel fine. It was nothing, alright just forget about it," You responded, removing your hand from his and moving to walk away.

"It wasn't exactly nothing though, was it? You collapsed. OKay that doesn't just happen for no reason. and You're different,.. you've been acting differently," Tony knew PTSD better than anyone, you had helped him through it after the events of New York so he knew what it was like. But to you, it was different. He knew what was causing him to panic, you, on the other hand, you didn't. Which, in your opinion, made it a million times worse.

You paused in the doorway, one hand on the frame, your back turned to his as he spoke to you, his words only built up a rage within you, made your skin crawl with anger.

"Come on. I KNOW what you're going through! Why won't you let me help you, Y/N?"

He turned around, hand still resting on the doorframe when you finally snapped at him. "How can you KNOW what I'm going through? I don't even KNOW what I'm going through! I have literally no idea what the hell is happening, or what happened to me okay! They took that from me! Whatever happened it had to have been important otherwise they wouldn't have wiped my fucking memory and that makes it WORSE! At least you knew why you couldn't sleep at night! I don't! So just let me be and stop pretending that you know what I'm going through!"

Halfway through talking Tony had tried to raise a hand to signal you to stop your rant, to stop talking. You had thought he was trying to make you stop your rant so he could speak which only made you angrier. You only stopped rambling when he screamed your name, finally getting your attention.

"Y/N!"

"WHAT!" You snapped.

"Look..." He said, finger pointing to where your hand was resting on the doorframe. You gasped when you saw it, hand moving away from what you had been touching. The entire time you'd been talking you had been causing ice to come from your fingertips, freezing everything around you that you had been touching.

"Oh my god.... Did ... Did I do that?"

[wolfpawn]

The Nicest Asshole in Hollywood

A story I made up last year but only finished today.

Summary - Tom is known as one of the nicest men to work with and when he finds himself on the set of Loki for Disney+, doing a few scenes with Ben Cumberbatch when his friend speaks with a member of the behind the camera crew who is openly hostile to him. Curious as to why that is, he learns she has a nickname for him, the Nicest Asshole in Hollywood.

NOTE - Swearing. Niamh is pronounced Neev. 10K words.

Tom Hiddleston had a reputation as the nicest guy in Hollywood, in film and the world in general, as of course, he did not simply do Hollywood films, he did shows on the West End, Broadway, etc, he would do anything for the fans, do ComiCons even though he had done all the required ones from his Marvel contract, he was happy to meet the fans and allowed his agent sign him down for more. He knew everyone on every set’s name, from the incredible directors he worked with to the catering staff and errands crew. He personally thanked them all after every production with a bouquet of flowers, or chocolates and a card or something similar that he knew they liked from some passing comment. Film crews were elated to hear when they were working with him, from the camera crew to the costume department. He was always polite and good-natured and the only reason he was ever tardy is because he was being nice to his legions of fans and did not wish to say no to them and when he did arrive, he would be perpetually apologetic with regards to the matter.

*

Benedict chuckled as Tom relayed a story of how Bobby decided he seemed to require a bath in one of the ponds of Hampstead Heath on their last walk there by the manner in which he circled his lead around Tom’s legs and seemed to be trying to cause him to fall into the water. “No offence Tom, but your dog is not an evil genius.” Ben dismissed.

"No, he's not but there are days I am convinced he's not as innocent as you'd think either," Tom countered. He stretched slightly. "I'm getting old," he groaned as he felt his body creak slightly.

"It's the hours sitting around in make-up and costume that's the hardest part, I think." Ben rubbed his Dr Strange goatee before getting to his feet. "I can't believe they dragged me here for this."

“We work too well together,” Tom sighed. “We’re our own worst enemies.” “Yes, I...Well, hello, Stranger.” Ben got out of the chair and embraced a woman who had walks towards them smiling brightly at him. He kissed her cheek as she stepped back. “How are you? I have not seen you in some time.”

“Not since Hal was about to turn two, I think. I’m great, How are you? How is everyone?” She looked directly at Ben as she spoke.

“Good, they’re great. Wow, has it been that long? No, we’re great. Sophie will be elated to hear I saw you. She told me you emailed her last week. We were wondering where in the world you were these days.” “Well, Kate asked me for some help on this and who am I to say no to her?” She smiled. “No, I am starting to get a few new jobs around these parts so I jumped at the chance to get into the MCU again.” “Right, yeah, you helped with the first few movies didn’t you?” “Back before this juggernaut came about. In ye olde days of Paramount doing them. God, if I’d have known this when Favreau asked me onto the first Iron Man set that it would turn into this...it’s insane.”

“You did a few of the first ones, didn’t you?” “Everything up to and including Avengers Assemble, then they went for bigger names when Disney bought in and left little old me to go do my own thing elsewhere,” She confirmed.

“So you know Tom, then?” Ben turned slightly looking to Tom who seemed to realise where he must have recognised the woman from, though he would have thought he would recall her better if she was something to do with directors and they had, at the very least, worked together on two projects with Thor and Avengers. He stood forward slightly to say hello to her but stopped when she looked at him, or more actually, the way she barely even glanced at him.

“Yes, sure I was on War Horse too, you twat, or did you forget that?” She laughed at Ben.

Ben winced. “Fuck, you did. How did I forget that?” “You’re getting senile, what are you now, nearly fifty?” “Fuck off.” He growled. “How dare you? What about you, hit thirty yet?” “Sadly thirty and I met and parted ways a long time ago. I guess I had to grow up and act like an adult at some stage.” Her face was stoic and her eyes flickered to Tom for a moment again before turning to Ben and smiling again. “Well, I best leave you both to get ready for work. It’s great to see you again Ben, hopefully, we’ll have a chance to catch up before you are dashing off again somewhere else for whatever great new thing you do next is.” Her face became more neutral before looking at Tom and giving a slight nod before walking off again.

As soon as she was out of earshot, Ben turned to Tom. “What was that about?” “What?”

“The look she gave you.”

“You’re asking the wrong person there. Why are you asking me as though I’ve done something wrong?” “No one who has worked with Niamh that is in any way nice has ever had a bad word with her, the only ones that she is cold to are the assholes, so why is she cold with you?” “I have no idea. I didn’t even remember her until you mentioned she worked on War Horse with us. Who is she?” “Niamh Murphy, Irish, obviously. She is the ultimate in producers. She can juggle anything, blockbusters, Indie movies, anything. She knows her shit. A director wants something, she has it sorted in nanoseconds, she is literally the best I have ever seen and going by the way you’re looking now, you know the name as well.” “I’ve worked on several movies with her but she never seems to be on set. I only get given scripts and such by her assistants.” Tom recalled seeing her in passing a lot but she rarely seemed to be around.

“I...Niamh is incredibly hands-on. I mean, Spielberg always tries to have her on his work. She was on 1917, she never missed a single day. Same with Imitation Game. She is great. I remember when I was on Atonement, she was the one to help me deal with the scenes where I had to be creepy with Juno Temple. She is great.” Tom frowned slightly. “I don’t know…” “Now I’m curious. Did you shag her once?” “Considering I didn’t even know her name, what do you think?” Tom scanned his memory for the limited times he met her. He recalled sending the thank you card and a small box of chocolates to her assistant on every production he did with her, which albeit did not seem as many as Benedict but he always made sure to think of her, even if he could not tell what she looked like. “I don’t think we even ever shared a conversation.”

“That’s peculiar, I thought you would have gotten on with her, she is a very amiable person. Light-hearted and well-read. I genuinely thought you two would be good friends.”

Ben’s bewildered frown caused Tom to see that this was the honest truth. “I don’t know.” Tom wondered about what he had done.

* “Is that everything, Kate?” Niamh walked over to Herron, handing her the permits she had secured for the use of the town the next week.

“Yes, I...where are you going?” “I have to sort the scripts reprint, there was an issue with Wilson’s, three pages were missing.”

“Just so you know, I am never letting you leave.” Herron declared.

“You know me, I won’t until the last roll of film is packed off to the studio.” Niamh walked around the corner laughing before accidentally colliding with someone. “Shite, I’m sorry.” She pulled back to see who she had crashed into. Her apologetic face became neutral once more on realising who it was. “Sorry.” She sidestepped and made to walk off.

“No, apologies, I…” Tom watched as she did not even look back and walked off without so much as another word, making him wonder what her problem with him was.

* Tom studied the manner in which Niamh Murphy reacted with those on set. It was clear she was well-liked. Everyone she interacted with smiled brightly. Ben was only around for a few days but the interactions he saw between them indicated to a true friendship. Wilson and she rarely spoke, but when they did, it was with smiles and laughter. He watched as she interacted with Kate Herron and again, the pair seemed to get on incredibly well, yet she rarely found her way into his company. A script with the added pages that were missing from a previous copy was handed to him by a set hand yet he watched as she gave Gugu, Wilson and everyone else theirs. He felt equal parts offended and genuinely hurt that he did not seem to even be considered to speak with by her. He wondered if he should mention something to Feige on his next visit to the set but knew better than to do so, there was no chance of getting to the bottom of it if he did. Perhaps it was a misunderstanding on her behalf. He did not wish to risk a woman’s career on something so simple so he decided to see if he could catch her for a moment sometime and see if there was something that needed to be aired. He could think of nothing, he genuinely rarely recalled seeing her. He knew her name but not the face as they never really interacted so he could not think of any such even. She was pretty, not what many would accuse of being a supermodel but she was not ugly by any means. He tried to recall if he drunkenly made a fool of himself in her presence or attempted to come onto her, a recollection of either scenario did not come to the front of his mind.

* His first two attempts failed miserably. She seemed to have an extra sense that seemed to know when he was around and would swiftly scarper on the sight of him in some other direction or if they were on set, she would find herself quickly in need of discussing something of some manner of importance with someone to prevent him from being able to speak with her.

Finally, he decided to grasp an opportunity while she and Ben were saying their goodbyes to one another. Tom walked over purposely before Niamh could realise he was there. When she ceased speaking to Ben for a moment, he smiled politely at the pair. “Ben, I know you need to speak with Ms Murphy, but I was wondering if I may have a moment of her time?” He gave his friend a pleading look.

Ben, knowing Tom’s attempts to get to the bottom of the Irishwoman’s lack of time for him, nodded slightly. “I’ll…” “That’s alright, Ben. You don’t have to go anywhere. I cannot think of anything Mr Hiddleston has to say that cannot be said in front of you.” She looked at Tom challengingly.

“I would rather…” He decided that it did not matter. “Very well, I must ask, Ms Murphy, have I done something in our time on set here to offend you in some manner?” Her face was unreadable for a moment before she answered. “On this set, no, nothing.” Tom studied her words. “And on previous sets on which we have shared employment?” She did not answer which in itself was her answer. “Can I ask as to what I did to cause you to do everything in your power to not have anything to do with me?” She seemed to contemplate saying something as she chewed on her cheeks. “Please. I only wish to right a wrong if there is one. I cannot recall such an occurrence but since it clearly had a lasting impression on you, I rather just understand how best to rectify it.” “And were I to not wish for any such rectifications?”

“Please, I just want to know what it is that caused this animosity towards me, surely if you are to actively avoid me, I should know as to why?” Tom felt himself get slightly annoyed by her dismissiveness. The look she gave him made him see that she genuinely disliked him. Part of him hoped it was she had some form of crush or something on him and was keeping her distance as a result but such thoughts died a swift and brutal death on seeing how she looked at him.

“Of course, you would not even remember. I need to ask, Mr Hiddleston, do you recall working on Thor with me, do you remember me being on set? Do you recall that I was there the day you came in for the Thor audition before Ken suggested instead that you try for Loki?”

He frowned and tried to recall those that were in the room, the casting director, Kenneth Brannagh, and two of the screenplay writers, Ashley Miller and Don Payne. There may have been more but he could not recall them odd the top of his head. He shook his head slightly.

“I recall you, though. I remember saying to Ken that you’d be a terrible Thor but you could be dangerous as Loki. You’d give the character sympathy from the audience. To this day, Ken reminds me how right I was.”

Tom did not know what to say to that. Her clear pride in her prediction was blatant.

“Then came time to actually film it, you and Hemsworth, no one knew who either of you were, not unless they watched Home and Away or that show you did with Ken, the name eludes me now. I came to you to give you your schedule, not usually the duty of a producer, I know, but I stated I was heading to the costume department, which was quite close to your trailer and Ken asked me to do so. I was too new to the career to decline such an easy request and Ken is a lovely man, why would I decline such a reasonable one? I get close to your trailer and hear you talking through an open window of it and am elated to know I won't be waking you from a nap or anything only to hear you speaking to Megan, one of the makeup girls. Only I was accidentally made privy to a little conversation between yourself and Ms Reynolds, more accurately, your combined thoughts of those you found yourself working with for the production.”

Tom swallowed slightly, he could not recall the conversation itself but he recalled the very pretty make-up artist he had slept with early in production, something he regretted later. He did it because he had broken up with his long-term girlfriend not long before and was feeling a little lonely over in the US by himself and she was beautiful and fun. He worried about what was to come, he glanced slightly to the side to see Ben looking at him very curiously to see if he knew what was to come next. To his shame and worry, Tom didn’t.

“So Hemsworth got a pass, Hopkins, Russo, Portman, all lovely things. Ken got a glowing review, as did the writers, then you came to, and I quote ‘That girl who looked like one of your little sister’s stupid colourful ponies from when she was a kid’.”

Tom bit his lips together. That was why he did not recognise her as well as he should have from Thor. When she did Thor, she had bright-coloured hair, pink with purple and blue. Most of the set thought it odd. Such hair was common now but she did it before such was popular but he remembered saying it now, he remembered his bed partner laughing as she had made the initial comment on Niamh but he had added to it. Looking at the face of the woman he had so rudely ridiculed now, he could see she had clearly been hurt for a time before she turned such hurt to utter indifference of him. “I…” He looked at Ben who seemed both shocked Tom would say such a thing and slightly angered that he had. He could not think of something to say bar the obvious. “I can only apologise, wholeheartedly. I’m sorry.”

Niamh said nothing in return.

“Niamh,” Ben interjected. “It was years ago, please don’t allow one stupid remark taint working with him. He’s not usually that much of a twat, I can assure you.” “I didn’t. After all, when Steven mentioned what he wanted for Captain Nichols, who do you think recommended one of the most talented emotionally expressive actors they had worked with for the job once I saw the name on the list of potentials? I pleaded with him to listen.”

Both Tom and Ben did not know what to say to that. Working with Spielberg was something Tom had only dreamed of, doing so when he had only been working in Hollywood for a mere moment seemed surreal yet he had and it remained a defining moment in his life. To think the woman he had insulted so horribly had fought for him to get the roles. He could not even force himself to speak.

“Tom is a great gentleman, Niamh, I know you have been exposed to something to the contrary, but he is.” Ben gave Tom a slight glare as he spoke but beseeched Niamh to consider not being so focused on the past.

“Yes, hence my nickname for him.” Niamh gave a false smile.

“Nickname?” Ben knew her cutting wit, he feared what was to come.

“Yes,” She turned to look at Tom, who was considerably taller than her in the eye. “The Nicest Asshole in Hollywood.” With that, she turned and walked away. “And stop giving me cards and chocolate when we work together, don’t waste your money.” She called behind her as she walked off.

Tom and Ben remained in silence for several moments before Ben turned and looked at a suitably embarrassed Tom. “Well, there’s your answer.”

Tom looked at his hands. “I just...I never knew…” “It was unfortunate for you that when you were ridiculing someone, she just so happened to arrive.” Ben was forced to admit it was terrible timing. “I didn’t put you down as someone to bitch people.” “I don’t, you know me.” “I do and the guy I know wouldn’t ridicule a woman in her early twenties for having some fun by colouring her hair, yet you did that. I can’t imagine how hurtful that was, then to add insult to injury, you gave her cards and chocolate after saying those things, acting like it wasn’t a big deal all while she recommended you to Speilberg and in turn, began our friendship even though she was insulted so deeply by it.” Ben shook his head. “You never even remembered saying it.”

“I didn’t recognise her.” Tom tried to justify himself. “Her hair was short and rainbow-coloured before.” “She dyed it back to normal about six years ago if my memory serves me correctly. That doesn’t excuse you saying it though.”

“I need to make this right.” Tom paced back and forth for a moment.

Ben eyed him warily. “How do you mean ‘make it right’? Tom, I love Niamh, she is a wonderful person and a true friend, but she is the most incredibly stubborn person I have ever met. If she doesn’t want to know you, then you are not going to change that, especially with her reaction just there, I don’t see her warming up to you any time soon.”

Tom’s head fell slightly. “I have to do something.”

Ben said nothing more but slapped Tom’s shoulder before walking off.

*

“I have the permit right here.” Niamh pulled out the required piece of paper and looked it over. “Yes, it has the times specifically on it and states we can shoot at that hour, stamped and everything.” She turned slightly to see a shadow beside her, when she noticed who it was she gave a polite smile. “Yes, I will fax that over as soon as I can so you have a paper copy but I will email it to you this second as well so we are all set. Great, thanks, bye.” She took the phone from her ear. “One second, Ben. I just need to sort this, then I am all yours.” “Don’t let Sophie hear you say that.” He joked causing Niamh to laugh slightly. When she sent the email she wished to send, she looked at him to show he had her undivided attention. “This is a great script, but is it the one I was supposed to get because it matches no one else’s? Is this like the movies where we all don’t know what anyone else is doing?” “Shit, let me see.” She scanned the details on the second page. “No, this was actually the original plan for the episode but it was changed because, as much fun as it is, it makes about as much sense as an elephant on a unicycle.” Ben chuckled at her analogy. “This has been missing and an aide is at risk of losing their job because of it so it is great to have it back and for it to have been with you so we know none of the details will get out.”

“The secret is safe with me.”

“Your lines were one of the few things not changed, so if you’ve learnt them, great, if not, I will deliver your actual script to you myself in half an hour. I just need to find the Gaffer and threaten his life first because he is giving lip about doing his actual bloody job.”

“No better woman.” Ben paused for a moment. “Niamh?”

“I don’t want to talk about it.” She didn’t look at him as she spoke.

“I’m sorry, for what he said.” “You don’t have to apologise for other people’s words, Ben. When we met, you joked about my hair to my face, with a playful smile and no malice. You know I don’t care about other people’s opinions, I never cared if anyone else liked my hair or not, it was the two-facedness of it I had an issue with. Lovely to my face before, saying that and polite smiles and cards after. No, you know me, I am completely okay with people not liking me. I respect honesty.” Ben conceded it was true. He had heard her talking to Sophie before about a director that she worked with that was professional with her at work but made no effort to pretend they were amicable outside of it and she was entirely happy with that, she knew where she stood and was alright with it. “It’s not like him.” “It doesn’t matter. I will murder the Gaffer, hide the body and have that script to you in the half-hour, alright? Excuse me, and if you’re talking to your wife, tell her I will post them to her tomorrow, she knows what I am on about.” “Stop buying our sons everything you see, you’ll be broke and we’ll need a bigger house,” Ben pleaded.

“Never.” She laughed before walking off.

Ben could only shake his head.

* “Coming.” Niamh rushed to the door and opened it before even looking to see who was on the other side, when she saw who it was, her light smile became cold. “Mr Hiddleston, is there an issue that cannot wait until set tomorrow?” Her voice was professional but very much making it clear she was not overly interested in speaking with him.

“I just wished to ask you something on the third page of my script…” Niamh stepped to the side to allow him to enter. Tom did so, noticing that, unlike his big suite, she was in a normal small room which startled him. The small table and chair by the window were covered in all sorts of paperwork as well as binders and folders and paper trays filled with different sheets and booklets and the small desk area that held the tv and tea and coffee supplies was set up like a desk with a laptop, a tablet and a printer, along with further paperwork. “Excuse the mess. I apologise, the man on scripts is new to the scene so he is still finding his feet. It has led to more than a few errors. What seems to be the issue?”

Tom was startled by her professionalism even with the new knowledge that she was anything but fond of him. “There is a significant portion missing. I go from being confronted to being in handcuffs without any form of explanation or even a scene cut.” He pulled out the script. “I apologise for bothering you but Karen is dealing with another matter and asked that I come to you.” “It’s fine, it’s my job.” She took the script from him and scanned through it. “Yes, this is indeed missing an essential part of the scene, I can only apologise for that.” “So this isn’t the only script with issues?” Tom took the small moment to speak with her.

“I wish. No, we are just having a few speedbumps with him being so fresh. I am not sure how he is doing this so early but he isn’t a bad guy, just inexperienced.” “Weren’t we all at the beginning?” Niamh paused and looked up, noting the smile on his face, it was polite and friendly. “Indeed.” She found another copy of the script for the entire episode and scanned through a few pieces to see if they were all there. “That should be correct. I can only apologise to you, Mr Hiddleston for the cock-up.” She extended her hand with the script in towards him.

“It’s fine, you don’t have to apologise, it’s not even your job. You’re just the one cleaning up all the messes.”

“Well, that is the role of the Producer.”

“I don’t know how you do it. We learnt behind the camera roles in college but seeing what you do...I could not do it.” “Perhaps it is fortunate, then, that they fall to my lot instead of yours.”

Tom paused for a moment as he thought of where he knew that phrase from. “That’s...Pride and Prejudice, isn’t it?”

Niamh’s brows rose, impressed at him for getting it right. “You are correct.”

Tom’s chest puffed out slightly in pride at being correct. He saw at that moment what Ben had been saying when he said that he would enjoy Niamh’s company, she was an intelligent and able woman, someone he could genuinely enjoy the company of.

Niamh watched Tom’s reactions carefully, something she had done after hearing his mocking words about her years before on the set. He had been so polite which angered her all the more. Even now, after being told why she was not overly fond of him, he was being sickeningly polite. “If that is everything…” She half regretted saying it the moment she saw his face alter slightly.

“Ms Murphy, I feel I need to apologise…” “I honestly do not wish to hear it. You apologised already.” “And you do not accept it?” “I’m not obliged to. I accept it, I simply do not wish to be overly friendly with you, Mr Hiddleston. We have very different ideas as to how to interact with people. I have no time for two-faced people, never have.” “But you recommended me…” “My personal thoughts on you do not take from your abilities as an actor. You were ideal for the role.” “Thank you. I...With everything that happened, you may not realise it but you caused me to fulfil a life’s dream to work with Spielberg.” “Steven is an incredible man. I can’t imagine that many would not wish to work with him.”

“I’m sorry,” Tom repeated.

“I honestly don’t know if you realise how much you apologise.” It had been something she realised he was prone to doing.

“I think it more warranted now than ever. I sincerely apologise for saying such horrible things about you. I know you don’t believe me, but I never should have said them and my reasoning for such makes it all the worse.”

That caused Niamh to frown. “I know I am going to regret asking, but why did you refer to it like that?”

“I was never the most attractive person.” Niamh’s brow rose. “No, I am serious, I only had two girlfriends in my life before I became famous, well, even fewer now but I was never overly popular with them. I broke up with my only ever serious girlfriend before Thor because our lives went on different paths and I did not wish to hurt her. It was clear after Wallander, she did not want to wait around, you know?” Niamh found herself nodding, wonder if he would ever get to the point. “Then suddenly, women were interested in me, very beautiful women, and I thought I should entertain their thoughts so they would remain so, even when they were unfounded and wrong.”

“Wow, so you had no issues with my rainbow, or as it’s called now, my ‘My Little Pony’ hair, but said you did because you wanted a good ride?” Tom nodded ashamedly. “You’re an even bigger asshole than I thought.” She walked over to the door. “What makes this worse is I actually liked working with you before that. Ken spoke so highly of you, I looked forward to it. Having to politely smile as Ben spoke of you with nothing but the highest of praise, knowing you were an ass behind it, now to know it was only so you could get some cow into bed that I know from hearing it with my own ears that Ms Reynolds thought little of you too, only the size of your dick preceded you and her curiosity got the better of her. You’ll be glad to know she seemed satisfied with your size.” She put her hand on the handle of the door. “If there is nothing more.”

“I’m sorry.” Tom walked forward. “So you said.”

“But for the added insult also.” “Well, I always wondered why. I wished to find out why me but as they say, be careful what you wish for,” She opened the door slightly. “But I appreciate your honesty, even if it is ten years after.”

Tom felt worse. “I’m so sorry. If there is anything I can do to make it up to you?”

“Can I ask why this matters to you now? In ten years, you never cared, why now?” “Something Ben said, about how he always thought we would have got along well.” “He said that over the years to me also but such is life. I doubt you will lose too much sleep over it.” “Well, it made me realise something, how I lost out on something great.” “I am not an easy lay, sadly. Unlike Reynolds, I tend to choose my partners with some manner of standard, she simply goes for everyone.” “It is not that I wished to sleep with you.” “Then what about me could ever have possibly interested you?” “Your friendship. Ben swore you were a true friend and I truly feel like I messed up my chance to have one in you.” He walked towards the door before looking at her. “I honestly feel terrible for what I said and for their effect on you. I should never have said them. I apologise for my insulting you further with my gifts of thanks when I had been so callous so unjustly. I am sorry.” He swallowed hard. “I wish I had been a better man and not been so stupid, I let my crotch dictate over my mind and I hurt you and ruined my chance to make a true friend and for that, I don’t think I will ever stop apologising.” He toyed with the script in his hand and walked closer to the door. “I am sorry for taking up so much of your evening.”

“It’s fine.”

Something came to Tom at that moment as he went to walk past her. “I don’t recall see you at Ben and Sophie’s wedding.”

“Perhaps you were not looking well enough. I was there. We actually were staying in the same hotel. But then again, I am good at blending into the background.” She opened the door. “Good evening, Mr Hiddleston.” “Good evening, Ms Murphy.” * “Mr Cumberbatch, I come bearing gifts.” Ben turned and chuckled on seeing Niamh holding a takeaway coffee tray in her hands. “One oat milk latte, ethically sourced, no cow, children or ants harmed in the making of this coffee. Only the environment from shipping it from South America to our pathetic asses here.”

“Thank you. And what about your drink? I would wager you negated all my good work with that. Is that cow’s milk I smell?” “Full-fat cow’s milk.” Ben’s nose scrunched at the thought. “Hey, I don’t shit on your diet, you have no right comment on mine.” “You mock mine all the time or are you forgetting the time you actually paid money to have a bag of rabbit food made and my portion requirements printed onto the damn thing?” Niamh snorted at the memory. “That was brilliant. I am so glad I was able to finally use those stupid maths from school and put them to some use.” “How did you get my weight?” “Your lovely wife.”

“Was she in on it?” Ben asked, remembering Sophie’s reaction to the bag he showed her.

“Hell, no. She’d never have been able to keep it quiet.” Niamh laughed for a moment before noting someone close by. “Mr Hiddleston.” She saluted politely. “I am not aware of your coffee preferences, so I hope you don’t mind if I only got you a plain black coffee.”

Tom frowned, unsure if it was some sort of joke but seeing her extend her hand with the beverage in it, he took it. “Thank you so much. I take a little almond milk usually.” “Oh God, don’t tell me you’re a vegan as well. Has he forced you to?” She indicated to Ben. “Blink twice for yes. I know he’s a pain for that.” “No, thankfully he sees me as half trying.” Tom chuckled, noting Ben’s frown at the two of them.

“I don’t even try. My mother is okay with a lot. My lack of partners has even had her sit me down and ask if I am and I quote “more interested in women” and how that would be fine but if I went home to my beef and dairy farming father and said I was a vegan, I would be disowned.”

“I really don’t know if you’re kidding when you say that,” Ben commented, drinking some of his drink.

“No, I’m serious, even vegetarianism would not be overly welcomed. I wouldn’t do it anyway, dinner is not dinner if it doesn’t have some form of meat on the plate in my opinion.” “My father says the exact same thing. One of my sisters is vegetarian,” Tom didn’t know why but speaking to her seemed so easy. Usually, his guard was up when speaking to new people at first but she seemed so honest.

“Smart man.” Niamh didn’t even look at him before taking her own coffee and throwing the cup holder in the recycling bin. “I better go and pray to some ancient God that no one is looking for me to perform miracles today. I mean, I am probably more likely to find gold or the secrets of the universe, but I can dream, right? See everyone later and if you have a script issue, I don’t actually care anymore, ad-lib it. You know the general gist of the scene at this stage, just wing it. Just don’t come to me about it.” “Was the coffee merely to tell us that?” Ben laughed. “Yes, yes it was. In the kindest way possible.”

Ben chuckled again. “Tom wouldn’t say no to my drink next time, just so you know.” “I’ll keep that in mind,” Niamh called back.

“You’ll need to start a tab though,” Ben warned.

“I’ll just add it to yours. I think you owe me circa two hundred thousand at this stage.”

Ben scoffed as she left. “I think that to be a conservative estimate.” He turned to Tom. “Right, explain.” “What?” “Don’t ‘what’ me. Why is the woman who as she likes to put it ‘Wouldn’t piss on you if you were on fire’, getting you coffee?” “I honestly have no idea. I had a script issue, a genuine one and I was told by Herron to go to her about it, so very coyly, I did. There was some talking, mostly me apologising and her indicating that she was not interested and then I left.” “What exactly did you apologise for?” Ben asked.

“I said that I regretted my actions, how I should never have been so shallow and that I wish I had not cost myself the opportunity of such a good friend. That you never stopped singing her praises, how she is a true friend and I messed up the chance of such, for no good reason and that was a pity.” Tom regaled him. “She seemed more annoyed than anything at my explanation.

Ben did not know what to say. “It appears to have meant something to her if she actually acknowledges your existence now. Look, Niamh likes honesty, no BS. She’ll be entirely honest with you. She has a saying she picked up somewhere. ‘I can be honest or I can save your feelings, I can’t always do both’ and she means it and not maliciously. Sophie always feels her opinion means a lot because it’s never out of wanting to hurt you or placate you but actually being honest with you. You don’t get that much on our lives. It’s refreshing, really.”

Tom nodded. Through most of the worst decisions he made, people around him had mostly remained silent. When said bad decisions erupted or fell apart, they then made comments about how they knew such would happen or they had seen it coming but yet had said nothing to him. When asked why they had not said anything, they mostly said that they were his mistakes to make or that they didn’t see it as their place even when more than once, he had specifically asked for their opinions. He wanted a friend like Niamh, who would tell you to your face that she loved you deeply, cared for you and would be there for you as a friend but that what you were doing was fucking stupid. More than once he had heard of her saying that to Ben or Sophie and was envious, he hoped the day would come he could have such words with her too.

*

“Ms Murphy.” Niamh was visibly wincing as she turned to face him. “If I could have a moment of your time, please.”

“Is it about the script, because I honestly was not joking earlier when I said to start ad-libbing.”

Tom chuckled. “I gathered such, and no, it’s not about the script.” She sighed in relief. “Then how can I assist you?” “It’s about my dog.” She looked at him curiously. “I am needed to film on the next location soon, as you, of course, know since you booked it but I don’t want to leave him behind here in a strange kennels in a strange country for a fortnight, it’s not fair on him but according to some of the staff, he is not insured to be on the next location and I was told that if anyone could sort that...” “Okay, get his details for me, age, breed, name and I will have him added but I am going to have to warn you, if you’re easily offended, you’re not going to like that he comes under the same category of property as your laptop and phone and such and I know he’s a living breathing thing and family and all but he is legally classed as property. Also, you will have to sign a form stating that should he become harmed on site, it is your responsibility as a dog is the responsibility of the owner, so he has to be in your control at all times and if he bites, you are entirely liable, not the studio. Understood?” “Perfectly. He’s a great dog, you won’t have to worry. Thank you so much.” “It’s fine, email me the details. “ She handed him her business card. “And I will have that sorted immediately. I will print the form there now, in a minute.”

“Thank…’now, in a minute’...that makes...that doesn’t make any sense.” Tom frowned at the words she had used.

“Nope, not to your lot but in Ireland, it’s a completely acceptable sentence. Welcome to your first class in Hiberno-English.” She shrugged before making a note of what Tom needed.

“Hiberno?” “Comes from the Latin, Hibernia, meaning…” “Winter, well, hibernus, hiberna, hibernum, pending gender of it.” She raised a brow. “I studied Latin in college, sorry. So what is winter-English?” “I studied it in secondary.” She shrugged. “And yes, they mean winter, but Hibernia is the Latin for Ireland so Hiberno-English is a subsection of Irish specific English language.” She explained.

Tom, having never known that, decided to check if that was true or if she was pulling his leg as soon as he was alone. “I didn’t know that.” “They don’t teach you everything in your fancy posh English colleges, in fact, they teach you nothing when it comes to Ireland, hence the blissful ignorance of most British people to your close neighbour.”

“I cannot argue that, my knowledge comes from my brother-in-law who was born there but moved to Britain when he was young and the one time I was there for filming a movie, High-Rise.” “J. G. Ballard’s book, right?” “Yes.”

“I read that, very...obscure.” “Definitely, but fun to film.”

“I wouldn’t doubt it.” She received an email on her phone. “I won’t take up any more of your time, Mr Hiddleston. I will have that matter dealt with immediately so to ensure your furry friend is allowed to join you and I will again reiterate, don’t bother me with scripts. I am at risk of going sniper in a belltower at this stage from it all.” She joked.

“I will run and hide. And thank you for sorting Bobby, and for the coffee earlier.”

“It’s my job so don’t worry about it.”

*

Tom found that slowly, Niamh was not avoiding him as noticeably. Her assistant handed him the form for Bobby and when he had signed it, told him that if he had any concerns, that Niamh would deal with them directly. A definite step in the direction he had wanted. Slowly, the small talk started, then some joking. Her initial hesitation decreasing and her smiles and playful looks increased.

When it came time to go to the new location a month later, the jeeps were being packed and he was surprised to go to the one he was meant to be brought in only to see the Irishwoman in the driving seat. “Hello.” “How are things?” “Good, thank you.” Tom opened the back door and told Bobby to get in before using the harness he was wearing to clip him into the centre seat. “Is it okay if I go in the front or would you rather I sit here with him?” “Are we the only two for this car?” “I think so. I think Natalia was meant to come too but she hates dogs so she is going with Kate instead.” “As long as he is okay in the back by himself, I can’t see why you can’t.” Tom ensured Bobby was secured and then went to the front seat, securing his own seatbelt as he did. “He is used to being in the front seat next to me but he’ll be fine. Thank you again for securing his coming with me.”

“Sure, it’s not fair on him to be shoved into kennels.” She looked back at the dog who seemed to be incredibly eager to get on the road. “He’s cute. Bobby, wasn’t it?” “That’s him and he’s great.” Tom beamed brightly. “Aren’t you, Boy?”

Bobby sneezed and continued to sit with his tongue hanging out of the side of his mouth immediately after as his response.

“I think someone needs some air conditioning. It is sort of hot here for four-legged passengers.” Niamh started the car and turned on the air. “Fix it according to his needs, it’s only fair.” “Thank you.”

“Any time.” * The journey to the next location was a good five hours long, made longer by Niamh getting out of the car every hour or so to stretch her legs and to allow Bobby a few moments to relieve himself.

“He can hold it a little longer between stops.” Tom offered. “It’s not nice for him. He needs a drink and some stretching. I wouldn’t do it with my own.” “You have a dog?” “Yeah, he’s with my parents on the farm while I’m here. Long-haired German Shep. Too used to his temperate Irish climate for this hellish climate. He likes to lie on frozen grass, not scorching heat so I thought it would be cruel to bring him over.” “Do you miss him?” “More than I could ever miss a person.”

Tom smiled at how she spoke. It was the same for him with Bobby. When he had a few days of work that he could not bring him on, he only cared about that first moment they were back together again, Bobby excited to see him and that rub and kiss to the top of his head. “I understand that. They’re honest. They like you or hate you. No…” He stopped and realised the irony of his words.

“Don’t you dare apologise again or I swear, I will leave you at this rest stop,” Niamh growled. “I couldn’t be listening to you. I get it, you’re sorry.”

“I am.” She glared at him. “I didn’t say it.” “Say what?” she challenged.

“I am not falling for that.” Seeing the playful grin on her face as a result, he chuckled. “Ben was right about you.” “Ben tends to be right about a lot of things, other than food choices.”

Tom laughed. “I am not disagreeing.”

They got Bobby sorted back in the car and started their journey again.

“Can I ask you something personal?” Tom enjoyed comfortable silences. He did not need to fill every minute with chat and noise for the sake of it but he did want to learn more about Niamh. They had worked together more times than he had realised. She had gone out of her way to actually push his name forward for more than one role and now that she was not giving him hate-glares, she seemed genuinely very interesting.

“That sounds incredibly dubious.” “It’s about your career, not your intimate personal life, I promise.”

She glanced at him for a moment. “Most people would assume my answer to have meant ‘go ahead, ask about my intimate relations with others’ or something to that effect rather than reassure me it is not as worrisome.” “I pride myself in not assuming the meaning of a non-straightforward answer.”

“Well, so long as it is not about my very personal parts of my personal life, you may.”

“How did you manage to get into producing and get so far so young?” “You mean how did I get to achieve what I did before being ancient with no actual links to Hollywood?” Tom nodded. “I actually do. My godfather.” Tom frowned. “My mam’s big brother is a Dublin man by the name of Brendan Gleeson, you may know him.”

“Ah, yes, I know of him. Large red-haired fellow. His son is in a lot of movies too.” “Yes. I got into a film school back home, studied what I needed to, then was very fortunate to have worked with Uncle Brendan and Domhnall when they did a few bits and was able to learn what I needed to learn on the job and was very lucky that a low budget movie wanted someone with a bit of cop on and a small price tag, I was recommended and it snowballed. I was very lucky. Right place at the right time to get my name in the hat and the fact I actually get shit done means I got great names liking me and boom, here I am, no dodgy black leather casting couch moments, thank God.”

Tom’s eyes widened at the reference she made.

“Yes, I know that may seem crass but I know how many people are forced to do such things just to get their name in the door and I was so lucky that Brendan promised my mam he would look out for me. It’s not always the nicest industry.” “Sadly not.” Tom acknowledged. “I know for women especially, there’s a far shadier side of the industry.” “Now, of course, I am accused of nepotism by some, but I obviously have a different surname and my dad’s brown hair negated my mam’s ginger so people don’t realise it but Uncle Brendan just kept an eye on me, he never had the big enough name to demand I get work. People just realised the working our asses off is a family trait when they realise we’re related.”

“It’s not like you can help that he’s an actor. A producer is different.” Tom pointed out. “As I said before, I did some of this in college and being honest, I cannot, for one-second grasp how you do it. Looking at a camera and running lines seems so easy in comparison.” “I couldn’t do that, I love organising too much. My dad used to laugh at me for how I organised the calf registration every year. Apparently, the local vets were gutted when I moved to London because my dad’s forms went back to making no sense and don’t even start on the Department of Agriculture, I got more calls about those forms the first Spring I lived in Britain. I had to actually start taking a week off in Spring to go home for a week to help Dad. Especially when they put everything online, he was gone altogether then.”

Seeing her laugh at family memories, Tom smiled. He had absolutely no knowledge of farming practice, he was not of that background, but clearly, Niamh loved it. “Do you find your name causes issues?” “Only for idiots. I mean, when I first start on a set, there can be a few mishaps. I have been called. Nie-am a lot or Nie-am-huh but when you tell people your name a few times and refuse to acknowledge incorrect versions after that, you find they learn it very quickly then.”

“I find Irish names fascinating. They don’t sound like they are spelt.”

“It’s not a phonetic language.” She shrugged. “My cousins, my family, all of us, we all have Irish names. My brother Aidan, most people get that. Then there’s my idiot cousin Domhnall, you all know him from the few things he is in, he’s sound. Tara is my sister, her name is easy too.”

“Yes. I’m afraid my mother and father kept it very simple. Emma, Tom and Sarah.” “Nothing wrong with that either. So, now, my turn. How does the son of a pharmacist or something to that effect, according to Ben, become an actor?” “My mother was a stage director for years.” “Ah, that explains it. Got the bug from that, then?” “Yes, was it like that for you and your uncle?” “Yes, we went to see them filming Michael Collins when I was a teenager, it’s an Irish film and I was behind the camera watching everyone running around. I am shit at acting, I can’t do the small nuances needed but I love behind the camera and there was this man by the name of Stephen Woolley, I worked with him a few times since he explained to me what was going on. He knows Uncle Brendan and he saw I was interested so he explained what was happening. All growing up, I had no idea what I wanted to do. I got the usual nudges you expect from your Irish farming parents, nursing, teaching, you know but they never appealed to me and that day, it all just clicked immediately. I figured out what I wanted. I did all the research, my mam literally drove me to Uncle Brendan’s the day I told her and he had me go through everything. Domhnall is the same age and he already had it in his head that he was going to be involved in film too so we both ended up studying filming in college and both ended up on opposite sides of the camera in the end, both very happy with our respective decisions. He started in directing and writing but found his way in front of the camera while I am still incredibly happy behind it.” “That’s great that you have family support, I found that important too. Though, my dad took some convincing.”

“I suppose he blamed your mum?”

“Yes, actually. That and my flair for dramatics as a youngster. Dad’s side are…”

Tom began into his background, keeping an eye on Niamh’s reactions to see if she was merely placating him or bored but the polite questions from time to time implied she was paying enough attention to spur him into speaking more.

“I am sorry if I bored you.” “It’s fine, I actually liked getting all this dirty lowdown on you so I can now force you to do as I say on the sets we share in the future.”

It was clear that she was joking causing Tom to chuckle. “So, that’s your secret.” “Yes, people don’t like me, they fear me and being actors, they hide it well.”

Tom laughed again before shaking his head. “Ten years, I missed ten years of your sense of humour for a stupid comment.”

Niamh threw her head back in frustration. “God, I am going to go back to not talking to you if you keep harping on about this, I swear to fuck.” Tom looked at her guiltily. “I’m serious, Elsa, let it go...I...oh, I am definitely going to call you that from now on if you don’t stop apologising.”

Tom hoped she was not being serious but he was grateful it was better than her last nickname for him and he looked forward to seeing if she was because she genuinely seemed like a good friend and it was unusual to feel as though he could be open with someone. He had not felt he could leave his walls down to a new person in years.

When they arrived at their destination, Tom made a slight joke about her driving.

“You know you’re an asshole, right?” She scoffed.

“I may be, but at least I am the Nicest Asshole in Hollywood.”

[realityhelixcreates]

Beta, Theta, and Me Chapter 10: Territorial

Chapters: 10/?

Fandom: Thor (Movies), Avengers (Movies) Marvel Cinematic Universe

Rating: PG-13

Warnings: Relationships: Loki x Reader (But not right now),Drug Use

Characters:  Loki(Marvel) Additional Tags:  A/B/O, Sorta, More Of An Exploration Of  Life And Self Expression Within An A/B/O Framework, Loki Does What He Wants, But Loki Does Not Actually Do What He Wants, Antagonistic Bosses,  Loki Has A Throne Now, But It’s Not What He Wanted

Summary: You learn the reality of not being alone in the universe

You hunkered down in your soft, fold-out futon couch, shaken by what you now knew.

They were invaders. Loki, Thor, all  the Asgardians, an invading force.

But they weren't invading this planet.

You didn't think you'd ever forget the blazing triumph in Loki's eyes, as he explained the plan. He might as well explain it to you. There was nothing you could do about it. There was nothing you would do about it. And Loki knew it.

Rain slammed into the glass like stones, flung by screaming wind. It had been pouring all day, even before you'd served Loki his breakfast.

“Did someone piss off your brother or what?” you joked. Loki swiftly grasped your hand before you could crush his pill for the morning.

“Yes, and I would have my mind clear when he comes to visit. I will bear the pain until afterwards.”

Thunder cracked the personable atmosphere of breakfast.

“You should retire to your rooms for a while.” Loki said. So you gathered up what was left of your meal and returned to your apartment. You had a nice little table in front of a window, where you sat with your orange juice and pancakes, watching the sheeting rain.

The sound of the Bifrost roared down louder than the rain. Thor had come by to discuss things with Loki several times now, you hiding out in your room each time. You weren't sure why you were never allowed to be seen-perhaps servants in Asgard were supposed to be invisible or something. Or perhaps Loki wasn't actually supposed to have you. Oh well, it wouldn't be the first time you were living somewhere illegally.

The two of them talked very loudly, almost shouting, but it didn't sound like a fight. It sounded more like enthusiasm, rising and falling, the foreign words and unfamiliar cadence. Thor stayed for several hours, keeping up their lively discussion, but you didn't once hear either of them laugh. Whatever their enthusiasm was about, it probably wasn't a cheerful thing.

You relaxed in your apartment, reading a battered old book while they hashed out whatever they were working on, making yourself a light lunch while the rain weakened and petered out. The Bifrost roared again, just as the sun struggled out of the clouds.

Not long after, you heard Loki calling for you, always as if he were right beside you. He was waiting at the table when you exited back out into his miniature kingdom, eyes bright with the exercise of thought. He waited patiently while you prepared fresh tea for him, and mixed it with his medicine, drinking it without complaint. Thor's Alpha scent hung around the place, somehow harsher than Loki's. You were tempted to dampen it with a scented spray, but you knew Loki didn't like them. 'Stinking, chemical concoctions' he called them.

You did chores around the penthouse, as he went over the contents of a notebook. You knew his medicine was taking effect when he suddenly started talking.

“How do you feel about this building?” he asked abruptly, shoving the notebook at you.

“How do I feel about it? Uh, well, let me see.” You took the notebook, full of runes and sketches. The sketch of the house Loki indicated appeared to you like a man-made hill, a cluster of little domes around a large dome, with no windows but several doors. It had a vintage science fiction kind of look, as if someone had designed a Hobbit hole for the far future.

“It's cute.” you said. “Looks like some kind of earth house?”

“Not quite.” he said, smug amusement coloring his voice. “Would you live in such a house?”

“Sure, I'd live in any kind of house. A house is a house, and I'm never gonna be picky about that. I do wonder about the inside lighting, since there's no windows.” “Oh, it would be lit by magic. Magic light it so easy to make that many forms of magic create light as a by-product! It would be bright as day on the inside. There could be no windows, because the structure would be partially underground, and the outside walls would be about nine feet thick.”

“Wow. I knew earthworks need thick walls, but that seems like kind of a lot.”

“But would you still live in such a home?”

“Well yeah. Still a house, after all. Look, I know you're high as a kite right now, but this is about something, isn't it? Is it what Thor was here to talk about?” “Insolent thing. I'm not that high. Am I? No, of course not. But yes, this is about our meeting this morning. Twice has my brother come bearing distressing news about the future of Asgard, and this time, we began planning. These houses are a part of it.”

“Is something wrong with Asgard? Are you guys gonna be okay?”

“Oh yes, we will be fine. I foresaw something like this happening, and my brother's pride is sorely bruised, but our people are in no danger. You see, the government of Canada set aside some land for Asgard to settle upon-a handful of islands off the coast of the larger island of Nova Scotia. This seemed quite generous at first, and quite in line with the kindliness that country is famed for. I could have told Thor that it would prove somehow false. If not humanity itself, then the governing bodies of humanity certainly are the least trustworthy things in this whole great galaxy.”

“What did they do?” you asked. “Are they trying to bilk you? Make you pay for it all? Force you into debt?”

“No, no. They gave us the land so that the native peoples they stole it from could never get it back. Settler's laws, or some such.”

“That's awful!” The disillusionment led straight to disgust, and no small amount of disappointment. Because Canada did seem so nice, and maybe it was just a form of American wish fulfillment to believe that Canada was somehow 'better' than the States. But realistically, both countries had been formed in the same way: European settlers sweeping from one coast to the other. And the only way it seemed that they knew how to do that was to smash their way through whoever was between the Here, and the There.

“Indeed.” Loki sneered. “Thor is enraged at the sheer ingratitude. Many times he has been involved in the protection of your backwater globe, and these fools seek to use him as a pawn. I may occasionally want to stab his face off, but he is still a god, and we are all of us above the petty greed and power games that humans play against one another.”

“What are you going to do?”

“It's very simple. We are going to secure the land, build a legal cage so tight that it cannot be taken away, make it ours completely, and without question. Then, when we have gathered the necessary supplies, we will turn the land over to the people it was stolen from, and Asgard will leave. We will invite them to live among us in the interim, and likely leave a small garrison behind to guard against Canadian invasion.”

“Ha!” you burst out. “Good! Fuck those guys! But where is Asgard going to go then? I can't think of anyplace that isn't already full of people. Except maybe Antarctica? It'd be pretty hard to live there though.”

“Asgard has the technology to make practically any rock a paradise.” Loki bragged. “But we will not be moving to Antarctica, no. We will not remain on Earth. No, Earth had it's chance, and chose betrayal. We will be moving to the planet you call Mars.”

“What? Mars? Like Mars, Mars?” you sat, shocked, the notebook in your lap. “You can't just...”

Loki silenced you with a thin, smug smile.

“Whyever not?” he asked. “Who lives there? What lives there? Nothing, and no one. We would not be pushing anybody out of their homelands, nor posing a danger to any ecosystem. There is nothing there but remote controlled toys. No one has claim over it. I know there is at least one fool who fancies himself a genius, and has convinced many that he owns the place, but how is he going to get there? In one of his constantly exploding vehicles? No, Earth has no power over Mars, and soon it will be ours. We are the ones who can make it a livable land. Humans simply don't have the technology or experience. Can you harness Bifrost energy to get the core and mantle moving again, to create a magnetic field? You do not. Can you live safely on the surface for long enough to get anything done? You cannot. In fact, for humans to be safe on Mars, you would have to hide behind around nine feet of Martian soil.”

“Nine-like the house? That design is for a Mars house?”

“Clever thing. Yes, it is for a Mars house. Part of a community partially above and partially below ground, connected by buried roadways. A city adapted to the planets unique characteristics. We will alter the landscape, reignite the magnetic field, cleanse the soil of radiation, perhaps use that as a secondary energy source for a while. The planet is rich in water: this whole system is so rich in resources that it would absolutely be under attack at all times if more people knew about it.

But you have us now. We know how to render empty planets useful. Once we have made Mars into our new Asgard, we will turn our eyes to the great potential of the one you call Venus.”

“You're gonna take Venus too?” you exclaimed.

“Take? Again, who owns it? No one. There is no one to take it from. Imagine thinking that just because you see something, just because you name it, that somehow means you own it. No one lives there, and there are no habitats to destroy, so why does this offend you so?”

You couldn't really answer. Everything he had said was true. And yet, you still somehow felt a sort of proprietary nebulous collective ownership over the planetary system that was your species only home.

“Do you feel entitled to the asteroids as well? The comets? The moons and atmospheres of the giant planets? The very dust of the stellar cloud? Your species once shared this backwater world with multiple other human species, but now that you are the only ones left, you've forgotten how to share with anyone.”

“Is it sharing? You can travel around better than we can. Will there be anything left by the time we're able to travel like you?”

He chuckled, the condescension like a thick layer of butter over bread.

“Oh, I understand now. You're so used to the overarching greed and cruelty of your own people, that you can't imagine that we could be any different. We aren't going to lock you little humans away from Mars, or Venus, or any other place. Indeed, why do you think we've been studying how thick a wall is needed for human safety on Mars? It is all but certain that humans and Asgardians will live side by side throughout this star system. You will join us sooner or later. It is inevitable. The instant the perceived challenge is issued, your desiccated space programs will flare back to life. You humans are incredibly competitive, though in a different way than Asgardians. We are more individual, but you drift towards teams. It will be interesting to see how the competition plays out.”

“You're looking forward to this?” you asked.

“I am counting on it.” he said. “Now, do you think that house would be big enough for you? It will be roughly three times the size of your current apartment, and partially underground. Would that bother you? Would you need more space?”

The notebook slipped to the floor. “You can't mean...” you whispered.

“Give it some thought. It won't be for a while yet, but I'm pretty sure it will be within your lifetime. Would you like to be the first human on Mars? Beat that so-called genius to the red planet? See us kickstart the world?”

It was a fantastic dream. Impossible. Completely impossible. But could you? “I-I don't know...”

“Think on it. But for now, I think this medicine is making me weary. I am losing track of time and thought. Take me to the window, and sit with me there.”

You did, making yourself comfortable on your special cushion, as he rambled about Asgardian building techniques, methods of energy storage, and how to contain oxygen in their hypothetical underground cities while working on building a sustainable atmosphere. He talked about Mars as if it were no more than a challenge, explaining all the resources that made the planet such a likely candidate for the transformation process. How they could alter the thin atmosphere with Thor's power to create ozone, split molecules to create oxygen, how to decontaminate irradiated soil, and even enrich it with naturally occurring resources. You didn't understand much of it, but the gist was that they had done this before, and only lacked the resources to build the tools they needed. As soon as they had that, there were no limits. According to Loki, it could all be done very fast.

And he was very fixated on the idea of you coming with him, seemed to have a very romanticized view of the human drive to explore. In some ways, he wasn't wrong. The thought of being the first human to travel to the red planet, to walk on its surface, to live there-it was thrilling. It was a dream humankind had harbored for a long time.

On the other hand, as far as you understood, Mars was kind of a shithole.

Yes, Loki claimed that his people could change that, prattling on about groves, and grasslands, and even tropics. He was also high. He could just as easily be talking nonsense.

Atmosphere notwithstanding, Mars was farther from the sun than Earth was. Wouldn't it always be colder? You could envision, after a lot of work and change, the planet hosting the kinds of things that grew in Siberia maybe. Lichens and short, scrubby grasses, possibly even conifers. Maybe seaweed, in the great seas and lakes he described the icecaps filling up.

But delicate tropical flowers, and big, soft fruits, and plants that needed three hundred days of strong sun and sweltering temperatures to thrive? No way. Better to leave the jungles to Venus.

Which was apparently part of the plan. The thinning of the atmosphere of Venus, would contribute to the thickening of the atmosphere of Mars. It involved even more technobabble that you couldn't grasp, but Loki was very sure about the viability of transferring resources throughout the solar system. From atmosphere, to water, to metals, to trace elements, Asgardians apparently knew how to do it all. It almost made you believe it.

Loki babbled like a bird all through dinner and the evening, and you were almost glad to be sent off the warm his bed. Your brain was exhausted, but he was as energetic as ever.

Stripped of your uniform, you snuggled into his luxurious bed, still trying to resolve the image of Loki-lover of opulent baths, rich clothing, and indulgent bedding-with that of an excited, daring, and rough living pioneer. You drifted off to a daydream of him, in a pith helmet and beige jodhpurs, standing majestically in a jeep that kicked up the Martian dust behind it...

                                                                               ******

...And awoke to Loki sniffing your hair.

He was pressed all alongside you, snuggled up with an arm thrown over your waist. And he was sniffing your hair.

He must have noticed a change in your breathing or physical pliancy, because he withdrew his arm immediately.

“Ah.” he whispered. “The jig is up, as they say.”

You scooted quickly away from him.

“What the hell do you think you're doing?” you demanded.

“Forgive me.” he said, yawning. “You just seemed so peaceful. I thought it a shame to wake you.”

“Did you turn off my alarm?”

He had the grace to look mildly ashamed.

“That...might have happened.”

“And there was nothing you could do but try to cop a feel?”

“I prefer to think of it as a friendly cuddle.”

“Well don't! Don't think you can just do whatever you want with me!”

“I shan't, I promise. As your master, I promise, I will not again overstep the bounds of our agreement. As my servant, I ask your trust.”

“...Maybe tomorrow.”

Face burning fiercely, you exited the bed, and hurried for the door. Your clothing was on the other side of the bed-the other side of Loki. In the dark, he might or might not getting a good look at your underwear clad rear, depending on how well Asgardians could see in the dark, so you booked it out of his room, across the hall, and into yours before he could say anything.

You threw yourself onto your futon, huddled down in your nice new blankets, and shivered. Your trust? He asked for your trust? He asked you to leave everything you knew, your whole world, to walk the distant sands of Mars? Something you couldn't even safely do until the planet had been transformed? He dared to lure you into a false sense of security in his sweet-smelling bed, and then ask for your trust? How much of your life were you willing to give?

[ad1thi]

and then there’s you | Au-gust Day 8: Superheroes/Superpowers AU

AU-gust masterlist

i took a brief hiatus but now im back!! this is possibly one of my favourite things ive written, ever

//

Steve was never expecting to get along with James. He didn't have the best start with Tony - even though he likes to believe that they've moved past that and have become good friends - and James' protective streak was well known. After all, the man broke records trying to fly back to New York fast enough and managed to show up just as the Hulk picked up Tony from the sky.

 He still remembers the way James landed around them with a thud, his faceplate snapping up and shoving all of them to the side so that he could get to Tony. He remembers the way Tony's face softened; the way James reached out with one metal encased hand to awkwardly rub his hair before settling on his shoulder.

 He remembers fiercely missing the time in his life when someone looked at him like that, like he was the reason the world continued turning.

 In retrospect, Steve honestly should've seen this whole thing coming, but he's still blindsided by the whole thing.

After the last of the Chitauri are felled down, Thor and James raging in the sky until they drop like flies, they regroup back at Stark Tower. It's almost too easy, over in a matter of hours, even though Steve feels like it's taken ages. They lock the Spectre away and clasp chains around Loki's body - and he can release a breath that he didn't know he was holding it.

 "Colonel Rhodes," he says, later, when they're all lounging in a beatdown shawarma joint, shamelessly taking advantage of an extremely grateful store-owner, “I just wanted to say thank you for all your help. Having two heavy hitters in the sky really helped us take down the stragglers. We couldn't have done it without you."

 James and Tony (from where he's resting on James' shoulder) both turn to him and give him identical looks, the kind that makes Steve want to duck his head and rub the back of his neck.

 "No need to thank me Cap," James says finally, "Just doing my civic duty." But he keeps looking at Steve, in a way that stirs feelings inside Steve that he thought had died when he went into the ice.

 Guess not.

 He nods once and is saved from answering by Tony grabbing the Colonel into another discussion. He takes another bite into his wrap, the food feeling wooden inside his mouth. Tony has one hand in the air, gesticulating wildly, but the other is wound around James, inter-twined with his own. It twists something inside Steve, and he tries to tell himself that it's just him missing his life before the ice. Before he was dropped into the twenty first century.

 He looks up to see Thor giving him an all too knowing look for a man who only met him a couple of hours ago. It makes him so uncomfortable that he stands abruptly, pulling both Tony and Rhodey out of their conversation.

 "I have to go," he says stiffly, "I have some work to attend to. I'll see you guys at the Helicarrier tomorrow at 0900 for a debrief," he nods at his team, "Colonel, it would good to meet you."

"Call me James," he says, nonplussed, "that’s what everyone who isn't this fella calls me," he thumbs at Tony; who's face twists in mock outrage.

 Steve doesn't say anything, spinning on his heel and all but running out of the shawarma joint, lest he dwell too strongly on the fact that James called Tony fella.

 Despite their horrendous first meeting, Steve and James actually get on fairly well. He's in New York a lot, despite still being on active duty. Ostensibly, it's because the War Machine - now rebranded as Iron Patriot armour needs regular check-ups and after what Tony and James mysteriously refer to as the Hammer incident - Tony is the only one who fiddles with it.

 It makes sense, since Tony designed the damn thing, but Steve knows that James is a genius of his own right. Privately, he thinks that James is equipped to deal with any and all faults in the armour, but he makes it a point to come for Tony. Watching your bestfriend strap a nuke to his back and fly into space with no concrete desire to return tends to do that to someone. Hell, if Bucky had pulled something like that he wouldn't have left him out of his sight.

 Besides, now that Steve has been living with him and gotten to know the man behind the mask so to speak, he can see why Tony inspires that kind of loyalty. The way he badly misjudged Tony still digs at him, even though Tony has waved off his apologies multiple times and promises that he harbours no bad feelings.

 Steve isn't complaining though. He likes that James visits, even though he frowns everytime James complains about how hard it was to finagle time with his superiors. Clint calls it his Captain America face, says that he makes it every time he thinks there's a fight. Steve doesn't know if he has a specific face, but he does know that it doesn't sit right with him that James has to fight that much to come stateside.

 That was the whole point of the War, that they would fight so that future generations don't have to. There's a lot to be said for the twenty first century. His country's proclivity with inserting themselves into every war that side of the Atlantic isn't one of them.

 Still, James' regular check-ups mean that Steve has gotten a chance to get to know Tony's bestfriend - since he winds up spending a lot of time in the workshop these days; sketching while Tony putters around. It's like white noise - the sound of a wrench or a blowtorch, interspersed with Tony and JARVIS sniping with each other, and it reminds Steve of the barracks, of the Howlies huddled around a single fire and sniping around each other.

 (It reminds him that he's no longer alone)

 When James comes however, the entire workshop lights up, and Steve along with it. Despite his best efforts, the smidgen of interest he'd felt in the shawarma joint has buried itself inside him, planted seeds and grown around his heart. It doesn't help that James is one of the most easy-going people he's ever met, the kind of person one gravitates to.

 He reminds Steve deeply of Bucky, but then again - Steve was never overcome with the urge to bear Bucky down and kiss him until they both couldn't breathe.

 "Steve!" James cries out, as the workshop doors open with the faintest snick, "It's good to see you."

Steve looks up from his sketchbook - where he's been drawing James funnily enough - and gives him a warm smile, "James. Good to see you. How's the Iron Patriot?"

"Don't call it that," Tony wags his wrench at Steve, looking like he's contemplating the merits of lobbing it at him, "You do not call it that in my workshop. This is a sacred space."

 "She's handling like a dream," James says over Tony, but he still walks over and pulls Tony in for a small hug before making his way over to Steve. The first time this had happened, Steve was almost jealous, but he's since realised that it's just a part of James' schedule. The need to physically remind himself that Tony is okay.

 "There's been a couple of tough missions," he continues with a grimace, after he's done surreptitiously looking Tony over and found his way to the couch where Steve is currently propped up. "I've definitely got some fresh bullet dents. But nothing Tony can't fix, isn't that right Tony?" he calls out to where Tony has turned back to his holo-screens and gets a half-hearted gesture in response that Steve takes to mean that Tony has heard James.

 "Enough about me though, not in the least because I could be arrested for going into detail," James reaches out and places his hand over Steve's; and it takes everything in Steve to not react to the touch, "You getting through the list okay?"

 A month into his stay at the Tower, Steve was listlessly chewing a banana in the Common Room when James came out for some water and saw him. "They taste weird," he'd said, when James asked if the banana had done something to offend him, "I guess I was just hoping it was something that hadn't changed."

James had regarded him for a second, and then pulled out a napkin from thin air, "You should make a list. It's what I tell most of my rookies, when they're going back after a long tour. Make a list of everything you want to catch up and work through it on your own pace. At the very least, it gives you something to do."

 Ever since then, Steve keeps a small black book on his person, filling it with a never-ending list of things. The entire team pitches in, depending on what it is that Steve is about to discover about the twenty-first century. Steve likes it best when James carves out time for him though.

 "I'm adding more things than I'm crossing out," Steve admits, and James clucks sympathetically, "but it's good. I've not Star Wars on my list next? And Tony made me promise to wait for you to come back so that both of you could introduce it to me together."

 James whistles lowly, but his eyes light up, "Oh I am so happy that you waited for me for this. Never listen to Tony, he thinks the prequels deserve rights," he bends down to whisper at Steve loudly, "we don't recognise the prequels."

"Is that prequels slander I hear in my safe haven?" Tony pipes up, spinning around to face them. He's still got the wrench in his hand, "Don't make me revoke your access honeybear because I will, don't test me."

 James holds up his hands in mock surrender. "I'm going to go freshen up," he says with a clap, "but after I'm back, we can discuss Star Wars strategy."

 Steve watches him go, until he disappears around the corner. When he looks back at the workshop, he sees Tony looking at him with a look that's half speculative, half sympathetic.

 "You know that nothing can happen right?" he says apropos of nothing, but Steve knows exactly what he's talking about, "It's against the law. DADT. If his superiors find out, his career is over. 's why me and him ended in the first place."

  Steve found out about Tony and James' history only a month ago, and the sting has faded. Mostly because he knows it was a long time ago, and neither of them harbour those feelings anymore.

 "I know," Steve says carefully, because Tony is still James' bestfriend, "and I wouldn't ask him to risk that. Doesn't change how I feel though. And if I have to wait, or hide it, or even ignore it until he's ready to deal with it - I'm ready for all of it."

 Tony nods, like it's the answer he's expected, "You'll be good for him Steve. He deserves someone who'll wait." Unlike me, who didn't goes unsaid.

 "I don't expect anything from him Tony," Steve says, looking Tony right in the eye, "but I can't just pretend I don't feel the way I do. Especially not if there's the barest possibility that he feels the same."

 Steve isn't generally good with these sorts of things, recognising interest. Still, he doesn't think he's imagined the looks he's gotten from James the past couple of times he's been over, over misread the touching, the talking, the borderline flirting.

 "He does," Tony confirms, "but like I said - nothing can happen." He says in a careful tone, and it takes Steve a couple seconds to cotton onto what Tony is implying. It leaves a rush through him, reminding him of back-alley trysts, protected by the shadows.

 "Nothing can happen," Steve repeats, and Tony pointedly turns his back as Steve leaps up from the couch and follows James out. He thinks about calling ahead, or maybe messaging - but there's a decent chance that James already knows about this conversation, since Tony wouldn't have brought it up unless James had expressly allowed him too.

 Steve might not know much about the twenty first century, but bro-code well enough.

 He knocks on James' door, thrumming with energy, and his heart stutters when James opens it in a towel; one around his waist, catching the droplets of water falling down his chest, and another around his neck.

 "Steve?" he asks, and there's no mistaking the hopeful tone in his voice. It confirms Steve's suspicions, that Tony was talking to him on behalf of James.

 Steve doesn't reply, just pulls him for a kiss.

 Fin

[the--sad--hatter]

Mischief & Madness - Chapter 3 (Loki X Reader)

Fandom: Marvel

Pairing: Loki/Reader (No physical description of reader other than female presenting)

Warnings: LOKI, Angst, lots of violence, graphic gore, extreme cursing, anxiety attacks. 

Summary:

Living in New York has its ups and its downs. Upside - You have a cushy job at Stark Industries. Downside - You wind up getting yourself kidnapped by The God Of Mischief.

All you wanted was a decent cup of coffee, now you’re stuck on the otherside of the universe with a sociopath who has only begrudgingly not murdered you.

To get back home you’ll have to work with Loki, and probably stop trying to stab him.

To regain his power, he’ll have to work with you, and probably stop trying to slaughter you.

When Mischief and Madness collide, chaos ensues. Even if you survive this, the universe probably won’t…

Masterlist 

Chapter Three

As soon as the doors opened Natasha sauntered out of the elevator, leaving you to trail after her. The first person to notice and acknowledge you was Vision, who drifted over and held his fist out to you.

 “I have garnered from watching the interactions of the team that when a friend is victorious it is customary to offer them your fist so that they may bump it.” He explained, pleased with himself.

 You shifted your coffee to your non-dominant hand and accepted the proffered fist bump, cooing under your breath at his adorableness.

 “There she is, my favourite lil genius!” Sam crowed loudly, jogging over to sling his arm around your shoulders.

 “Excuse me? Is she the genius who pays for everything?” Tony squawked, offended.

 “Shush, let me have my moment.” You scolded.

“You did very well today.” Wanda said softly, and you had to look around for a moment before you spotted her on the couch, sandwiched between Clint and Steve.

 “Yeah, I had Friday pull the footage so I can watch it on repeat.” Clint sniggered ecstatically as Sam swept you over to the seating area.

 Something cold touched your wrist and you looked down at Bucky who was splayed across an armchair. He didn’t say anything, just caught your eye and gave you a firm nod of approval.

 “What kind of coffee is that?” Tony demanded, snatching the cup from your hand and taking a sip.

 “Gimme a break, I took an impromptu and unwilling flying lesson today.” You scoffed, snatching it back.

 “But I caught you!” Peter exclaimed, wiggling in his seat like a proud puppy who’d successfully performed a trick.

 “Yes, yes you did. Three cheers for Spiderinfant!” You scoffed, letting Sam push you onto the couch next to Steve.

 “I agree, congratulations are in order for the young ones and their part in todays battle. Were this Asgard, we would feast for days to honour them.”

 “Let’s go to Asgard then.” You stage whispered to Peter.  

 “Alas, I have just returned from Asgard and I have much news.” Thor admitted heavily.

 “Lay it on us, how much did Loki screw up Asgard?” Tony asked.

 “While masquerading as my father Loki ruled Asgard fairly and justly. He built monuments to himself of course but the people did not seem to mind. I suspect many of them knew it was Loki in disguise but choose to continue the charade. Indeed, Asgard is peaceful and prosperous.” Thor admitted, befuddled.

 “Huh. How about that? The would be King was actually fit for the job. Maybe we should have just given Loki the planet.” You sniggered.

 “Joking. Obviously.” You quickly added when you were subjected to numerous hard stares.

 “So what’s the bad news?” Steve asked, getting back on track.

 “The Enchantress Amora began causing havoc in Asgard, that is why Loki came here to find a weapon to stop her. She has been captured, though only barely. I believed Loki was acting in Asgards best interest until we went to the Vaults and the tesseract disappeared.”

 “Loki has the Tesseract?” Steve asked sharply.

 “I do not know. The Tesseract was in the vault. It disappeared before our very eyes and we know not where it has gone.”

 “Friday, where’s Loki?” Tony snapped out quickly.

 “He is on the balcony reading about childhood trauma and the effects it can have in later life.” Friday responded.

 “Who gave Loki a book?” Steve sighed.

 You sunk down in your seat guiltily, refusing to meet Natasha’s eye.

 “I did. Thought he might learn something.” The redheaded Russian said blithely, covering for you.

 You put your hand up nervously.

 “You can go to the bathroom, you don’t need to ask.” Clint whispered, shaking his head slightly at you.

 “Good to know, but… What do you mean The Tesseract disappeared. In all the years it was studied on Earth it never acted on it’s own. Someone had to have taken it, somehow. There’s only one person we know of who can do anything similar to that, and he knew where it was. It had to have been Loki.” You suggested.

 “Agreed. Friday, up the security on Loki and around the tower.” Tony instructed, taking your suggestion seriously.

 “I will guard Loki personally.” Thor said sagely, picking up his hammer.

 He didn’t really wait for an agreement, just stomped out onto the landing and stepped over the edge.

 “Love that guy. Knows how to make an entrance and an exit.” You snorted.

 “You’ll get used to it.” Steve assured, patting your shoulder.

 “Will I? Because as fun as today has been, I don’t really see myself hanging out with you in much of an Avenging capacity. Feel free to invite me to Pizza Parties though! And by feel free, I mean do it or I’ll subscribe you to every penis enlargement scam on the net.” You warned.

 “You wanna tell her?” Steve asked Tony.

 You looked between them, teetering between curious excitement and nervous fear.

 “Tell me what? Tell meeeeeeeeee!” You demanded.

 “Wanna hang out with us in an Avenging capacity? Pizza parties included.” Tony asked giddily, looking quite proud of himself.

 “All of our scientific minds are also out on the front, fighting. We think it would be beneficial if we had people working full time on tech, communications, weaponry etc… People we can trust. We already know you, we like you, we trust you and you’ve more than proven how capable you are.” Steve added.

 Proud of you, Tony was proud of you, not himself. You were being extended a coveted invitation to…

 “So you want me to be your ‘Q’?” You clarified.

 “Yes.” Steve agreed, rolling his eyes when you and Tony gaped at him in surprise.

 “I’ve seen James Bond.” He said flatly.

 “We’re offering you a job Princess. We want you to move into the compound upstate and work for The Avengers full time. You wouldn’t be in the public eye so you would be safe, and yes you will have your own lab. All the toys and funding you want.” Tony explained.

 “Barnes and I have worked out a training schedule for you, not that we’re expecting you to go on missions.” Natasha added, smiling over at you smugly.

 “We picked you out a room next to mine.” Wanda said excitedly.

  “I stopped Tony from making your room pink, but I couldn’t talk him out of the Canopy bed.” Sam snorted.

 “That beds awesome. If you don’t want it, I’ll have it!” Clint offered enthusiastically.

 “Banners at the compound now, setting up your lab equipment.” Steve added, explain the Doctors absence from the meeting.

 “Wait, you’re taking her upstate?” Peter piped up, near pouting.

 “Relax kid, we’re not locking her up, she’s not going from Sleeping Beauty to Rapunzel. You can still have playdates.” Tony assured.

 Throughout all the excitement you had remained uncharacteristically silent, something that started to dawn on everyone.

 “Uh, I… My coffee is cold. I’m going to make a fresh one.” You muttered, getting stiffly to your feet.

 “Princess?”

 “Just give me a minute, please. I’ll be back.” You said briskly, high-tailing it towards the elevator.

 “Well done guys, you scared her off.” Sam grouched as you slipped into the elevator, trying not to hyper-ventilate.

 It was a more than generous offer, it was a dream come true. But you couldn’t help but wander back to your lab in a daze, trying to untie the knot in your stomach. This was literally the biggest thing to ever happen to you, being invited to work with Earth’s Mightiest. You’d have access to resources and tech beyond your imagination, you could work directly with Tony and Banner not just for them. You could have a hand in saving the world, changing it, improving and saving lives.

 So why were you sat on a chair with your head in your hands and trying not to cry?

 “Princess, your heart rate is elevated and you are showing signs of distress. Is everything ok?” Friday asked, her volume lower than it normally was.

 “And there is your greatest fear, laid bare. You can’t stand the thought that your death will be as meaningless and unimportant as your life.”

 “I’m fine Friday.” You answered numbly.

 “The genius in a tower of people smarter than her, brushing shoulders with champions and knowing she will never be one, surrounded by greatness but unable to achieve it herself.”

 “Should I inform Mr Stark you need him?” She prodded.

 “You hate that you are insignificant, that you will never rise above the mediocrity that is so prevalent in your race.”

 “No. I don’t need Tony. I don’t need anyone.” You replied coldly.

 You knew what was wrong now. You were scared. Scared that you’d have the chance to be something more, to be important and that you would blow it. It was easy to hope for something but when that hope came to fruition it wasn’t easy to follow through.

 What if you weren’t as smart as they thought you were?

 What if you messed up and someone got hurt?

 What if you crumbled under the pressure?

 What if you let yourself down?

 What if you let Tony down?

 What if you got what you wanted and realised it wasn’t what you needed?

 What if you didn’t fit in?

 What if they realised the same thing everybody else always inevitably did, that you weren’t likeable?

 What if you got thrown out and lost everything?

 You were so consumed with what ifs that you didn’t notice that Friday hadn’t answered you. You only looked up when something you couldn’t quite put your finger on let you know something was wrong. You looked around the lab, on alert, searching for what was wrong, when you heard it.

 Or rather, you didn’t hear it. The lab was full of equipment and machines that were always on, humming and whirring, the white noise of machinery. It was silent now though, and now that you realised that you could see that all the blinking lights were off.

 “Friday?”

 There was no response, and a chill ran down your spine. You pulled your phone from your pocket and frowned at the black screen. You raced towards the elevator, knowing full well what you’d find and you were right. There was no electricity in the building, or anything in the building. Something had drained all the power.

 Which meant…

 “Hello Vænn.” He hissed, right behind you.

 Loki’s cell was useless.

 His fingers closed around your elbow and you were forcibly slammed into the nearest wall. His green eyes glinted in the darkness and something sharp and cold pressed into the tender flesh over your thrumming pulse.

 “Is that a dagger at my throat or are you happy to see me?” You laughed breathlessly, without humour.

 “You bested me once, I can not let the insult pass, nor risk you doing it again.” He explained almost amicably.

 He was so close you could see the flecks of gold and emerald in his eyes, and the regret as well. It almost distracted you from the sharp pain in your neck until you felt something damp drip down your skin. The dagger was so sharp it had started to slice through your skin even though he’d made no move to injure you yet. His gaze flickered down and he watched the thin rivulet of blood roll down your throat.

 “You’re hesitating.” You accused him.

 “Are you so eager to die?” He threw back.

 “Just wondering if that connection I felt we had was in my imagination, because after our moment on the balcony I thought we were friends. And friends don’t slit friends throats.” You told him, half joking-half imploring.

 His eyes darted across your face like he was searching for something, some kind of sign about what to do. Or maybe he was just relishing in your terror and you were projecting.

 “I was King. I had the throne and the power. The people adored me, even if they didn’t know it was me. I had everything and it’s lost because of you. You took everything from me and taking your pathetic life isn’t an even bargain but it is all you have, so it is what I will take in recompense.” He hissed, his eyes brimming over with darkness and hate.

 “Loki, don’t. Please don’t kill me.” You whispered softly.

 “For someone with so much pride, you do beg so prettily, sweet Vænn.” He whispered back, his tone hard where yours had been gentle.

 There it was again, that word. What it meant was still beyond the reaches of your knowledge but it hardly seemed pertinent right now, with the tower shrouded in darkness and your blood painting your skin.

 They had to know Loki would be free, The Avengers had to know. If you could just stall long enough, distract him, you could survive. You could beg some more, play up to the pathetic mortal gig, wait for someone stronger than you to come and rescue you.

 “You can try as hard as you like to lay the blame with me but we both know you were never really King, you were a bastard prince playing pretend.” You snarled.

 You didn’t want to die, but in the end you were still you, and you didn’t want to snivel and beg. There was no point in surviving if the price was being unable to look yourself in the mirror.

 Thunderous crashing above you made you flinch, unwittingly slicing your own skin a little more. The entire tower shook and for a moment you thought an Earthquake had struck New York, but everything soon became clear.

 “Loki! Stop this at once!” Thor roared, his booming voice reaching you a split second before he came crashing into the lab, the hammer swinging in his hand. When he saw you, half hidden behind Loki and blood beginning to stain your shirt, his eyes widened. Which begged the question, if he didn’t know Loki was about to kill you, what was he demanding that Loki stop?

 There was one final crash as the ceiling above your head collapsed, plaster and concrete raining down on your lab in a dusty explosion. Instinctively you hid behind Loki, using him as a shield and forgetting about the dagger that he thankfully pulled away in time. When the dust cleared you realised he wasn’t even paying attention to you, his eyes fixed on the centre of the lab. Out of the corner of your eye you saw Thor raise the hammer but you couldn’t care less.

 Levitating off the ground, smack in the middle of your lab, was the Tesseract. Blue light shone from it, casting a glow over everything it touched. It was… mesmerising. Utterly entranced by it you stepped forward in tandem with Loki, unaware you’d put yourself between him and Thor. Thor was yelling something but you couldn’t make it out, it was like you were underwater, separated from the world and drowning in blue light. The only thing you could clearly hear was your own heartbeat, slow and steady, calmly pulsating as you walked towards the Tesseract as the light got brighter and brighter.

 And then the floor dropped out from under your feet and swirling blue light was the only thing left.

A/N - Aaaaaaand we're off.

I think it's setting itself apart from MMYM. I feel like Princess and Kitten, while both sassy af, are quite different, and this Loki is a little bit different as well. I could be wrong though, so, thoughts?

Ngl though, I am already digging the Princess/Loki dynamics.

Permenant Taglist (Closed) @buckysknifecollection​​ @my-patronus-is-a-raptor​​ @thelostallycat​​ @dilaila95​​ @dropthepizza346​​ @destiel-artemis​​ @hiddles-rose​​ @myfandomlife-blog​​ @fangirlwithatrowel​​ @liveonce-sodoitright​​ @spnrvt​​ @tarastudiesalot​​  @dahkness​​ @sexyvixen7​​ @jaynnanadrews​​   @pinkisokay​​ @angieptt​​ @anamcg317​​ @belladonnarey​​ @queen-kayy92​​ @breezy1415​​ @penumbrawolfy​​ @fairislesheets​​ @lianadelphius​​ @youhavebeenspared​​ @candyxcyanide​​ @musingpredilection​​  @isaxhorror​​ @destiel-artemis​​ @my-drowning-in-time​​ @isabelcrichards​​ @teh-nerdette​​ @dlcita​​ @deathofmissjackson​​ @life-wanderer​​ @cleo0107​  @drdorkus​​ @inquisitor-selvala​​ @le-mow​​ @zeannastardust​​ @nighmxre​​ @writingforbucky​​ @abo4280ooof​​ @mad4oak​​  @aven-gers33​​ @helloimanavenger​​ @brownlee-22​​ @amoonagedaydreamer​​ @cowardlycandy​​  @secondsineternity​​ @mywinterwolf​​     @stressedandbandobessed7771​​ @jamesbucktitybarnes​​ @thirstofgames​​ @boxofteenageideas​​ @dark-angel-be-thirsty-af​​ @cdwmtjb8​​ @happybookmuffin​​ @belles-garden​​ @themusingsofmany​​ @infallible-thoughts​​ @adefectivedetective​​ @riverdaleserpent04​​ @jazztherebel​​ @unlikelygalaxygiver​​ @stuckybanner​​ @littleredstarfish​​ @vikkleinpaul​​ @tenthousandcolors​​ @for-the-love-of-the-fandom​​ @wherdtonygo​​ @bloglovelylady​​ @angelofivory​​  @tell-me-a-poem​​ @xthefandomequestrianx​​ @kaz22992​​ @sleepingspacedragon​​ @it-jinxed-us​ @iwritesmutsandfluff​ @brat-in-a-teacup​ @rvgrsbrns​

Mischief & Madness Taglist

@get-the-salt-now​ @myownviperroom​ @iamnowspider-fanbitch @jn-wolf​ @evythepokemontrainer @pink-meraki​ @lookalivefrosty​ @delicatelygloriouspenguin​ @maaryisafangirl​ @kaetastic​ @lokis-high-priestess @lisaspageofstuff​ @it-jinxed-us​ @hanniballecters​ @pandness​ @condy-wants-a-cookie​ @jessieray98​ @darkangeldesignstudio​ @rjohnson1280​ @cateyes315​ @pandacookieowo​ @petra-arkanian-1497​ @unfriendlyrightfighter​ @termaks @inquisitor-selvala​ @aurorawitchcraft​ @myfandomlife-blog​ @casket-of-ancient-mischief​ @severepienerdturkey​ @oldspirit​ @iwritesmutsandfluff​ @myfandomlife-blog​ @call-me-ziphon​ @noshi-chan​ @nonsensicalobsessions​ @alexakeyloveloki​ @donteatmycookiesplease​ @midgardian-mistress​ @humbledarkness​ @bionic-otp​ @sammy-jo1977​ @lieswithoutfairytales​ @thankyouforanonymity​

[gingerwritess]

"Isn't it past your bedtime?" / "Isn't it time you died?" pRE-DATING IDIOTS AKHKSHDKAJSJ

uh ohhh did i completely ignore the quote you gave me and decide to focus on only the “pre-dating idiots” part ???

Y E P

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

You can count all the times you’ve encountered Loki Laufeyson on one hand.

It only takes two fingers. You’re not exactly friends.

The first time ended so well, with his torso punctured by bullets and Loki frowning across your office at you pulling the trigger with your eyes squeezed shut—the second accidental encounter in the showers was no better.

After swearing off communal showers altogether and deciding to completely avoid the psychiatric floor of the tower, you expected your days running into a god with slightly greasy hair might be over.

But he’s in your office again.

Already lounging comfortably in your chair, ankles crossed up on your desk.

He sits up when you slip in the door, trying not to bring any attention to the fact that you’re exactly seventeen minutes late, and for half a second Loki looks just as surprised as you are.

Although, Loki doesn’t whip out a taser with a quick shriek of fright and jolt his body with a good 50,000 volts of pure electricity.

Nope, you’ve got that part covered.

You weren’t expecting him to actually pass out, but he crumples onto your desk before you’ve caught your breath, eyes rolling back in his head.

Twitching.

His mouth is still half open with the almost “not you agai—” he was trying to get out.

Note to self: tasing a god works much better than shooting him.

“What the hell are you doing in here??” You hiss, tossing the taser on your desk and shoving him hard in the arm.

Loki just…jiggles.

Okay, you weren’t expecting him to be that deeply unconscious.

“Loki?”

No response. You poke him a couple times with the end of a pencil—he just twitches a couple more times, body jolting with a few leftover sparks.

Oh god.

People come in here. Appointments, meetings, memos, your coworkers and supervisors come in here constantly, and now you have the highest secured prisoner in the tower unconscious on your desk.

You give him a good shove and hiss his name, only for him to flop onto the floor with a loud thud.

Oop.

Cringing and praying nobody heard that, you hurry to the door and shut it, just in case.

He’s out cold.

You tug a lock of his hair, flick him on the forehead, pinch his arm, and he still doesn’t move.

His skin is strangely cold, now that you’re actually touching him. Feels normal otherwise, though you didn’t really know what else to expect—I mean, it’s not like you’ve ever touched a god before.

But he seems pretty…human, up close.

Having his cheek squished into the hardwood floors is certainly helping, and oh—yep, okay, now he’s drooling.

This guy threatened you?

Power feels good, let’s just get that out there now. It’s a thrilling rush, a little fizz in your soul that you never want to lose, knowing that you just took down a god.

What you’ll actually do with him until he wakes up…yeah, that’s a good question.

After a pointless ten-minute struggle of trying to drag his body behind a filing cabinet, his legs still stick out a mile in plain sight, so you have to haul his limp ass back to your desk—under it seems to be the only option.

Common sense seems to be telling you to please, please just call security, but your idiot side of the brain is curious.

It’s just weird, why he keeps showing up in your way, out of all the other employees here; you just want to ask him. Just want to…try your hand at a little interrogating.

Knowing you have the power to knock him out might already be getting to your head.

Well, that, and Loki looks like an idiot.

That whole terrifying image you’d had of him, the one where his blue eyes were rimmed with red and flashing across tv screens with warnings, that image of him sneering at you in the showers, him unaffectedly covered in bullet holes, put there by you—gone.

All you can see—and will ever see—now is Loki, god of mischief, quite literally shoved under your desk.

Butt in the air, face smushed against the floor, arms flopping by his sides.

Almost an hour later, Maria Hill stops by, knocking on your door and peeking her head inside.

“Did you get the transmission from Hungary?”

“Working on it now,” you smile, tapping your computer. “Need anything?”

“Nope, just checking, keep it up.” She looks a little distracted, reaching up to press a button on her earpiece. “Oh! I should tell you, Loki’s being pretty cooperative today.

You blink.

“I-is he really?”

At that exact moment, of all the moments in the world, a cold hand wraps around your ankle and gives your leg a very telling, very rough tug.

You have to bite your tongue not to squeak.

“His therapist told us the session they just ended went better than ever,” Hill continues, over a paper on her clipboard as she does, “we upped his visits to three times a day, seems to be helping. Thought you might want to know since you’ve had a couple run-ins with him.”

“Nah,” you croak out when Loki squeezes your ankle harder, “don’t care!”

“Oh.” She shoots you a strange look. “Okay…well, still stay away from him if you can. He’s still extremely unstable.”

You nod vigorously, the possibilities of everything that could go wrong with having Loki hidden under your desk ricocheting around your mind.

Particularly the one scenario where his fingers crawl any higher up your leg.

Or the one where Maria Hill, who holds your fate at this company in her bare hands, finds Loki under your desk—and not at therapy—and you get fired to hell.

“You okay? Don’t look so good.”

“Just peachy!” You laugh, waving her away and going back to your computer despite the grip on your ankle tightening. “I’ll get this back to you as soon as I can.”

Thankfully she flashes you a smile and a nod and shuts the door behind her.

You immediately fumble for your taser as Loki shoves your rolling chair away from the desk, spilling out from under it with a groan.

“Don’t move,” you hiss, jumping to your feet and pointing the taser in his face. “Get up, sit in the chair. Quick.”

“Do you have to put me there? Couldn’t have possibly lain me out somewhere, given me a pillow?” He rubs his aching cheek with a scowl, fingers finding the trail of drool down to his jaw and quickly wiping it away.

You might’ve imagined it, but it sure did look like his cheeks reddened upon feeling it there.

He’s back to a dreadfully annoyed scowl, glaring daggers at you as you hold the taser all the way out in front of you, eyes wide and clearly, laughably terrified.

“You almost fooled me, mortal,” he chuckles, slowly raising empty palms to you as he sinks into your desk chair. “I thought you quit. But you haven’t scurried off quite yet, have you, hm?”

“I’m not going to let you ruin my future,” you snarl back, and by some miracle, your voice doesn’t shake. “A couple creepy guys aren’t going to force a decision like that on me.”

Loki nods, eyebrows twitching suspiciously as he looks at you sitting on the edge of your desk, your taser still at the ready.

“I’ll use it again.” You shake it, just for emphasis.

“I don’t doubt it.”

An uncomfortable silence settles over the little room.

He just stares at you.

Loki does a lot of staring, you’ve noticed. From the showers incident to passing in the halls, he’s always staring.

“To be fair, I thought the office was empty.”

You blink, dropped back into reality by his strange accent.

“Why the fuck would you just assume it was up for grabs??”

“Oh, she has a mouth on her,” Loki laughs, leaning forward in the chair.

“Fuck you.”

He spreads his arms with a smug little smile. “Have it your way. You were, might I just add…” he glances at his bare wrist. “Exactly seventeen minutes late. Little rebel.”

“And why do you know my schedule?”

Loki sighs, evidently bored with all this and annoyed that you decided to come into work today. Like a normal person.

“I observe, you only watch. I reckon I know every employee’s schedule on this floor, I have to find some way to entertain myself…” he sighs again, dramatic and it just makes you want to slap him across the face. “Don’t flatter yourself, darling. It’s not just you.”

“Don’t call me darling.” Eyebrow raised, you slide off the desk with a slight boost of confidence at the fact that he’s not just stalking you. “What about the showers, then? Or the first time you were in here?”

“Ah, the time you used me as your personal shooting range?”

“…yeah.”

Okay, maybe you’re starting to feel a little bit bad about shooting him.

“Strange workings of the universe,” he hums, looking a little too relaxed in your chair now. “Our paths keep crossing. Believe me, if I had it my way, I’d keep well away from the likes of you.”

“Gee, thanks.”

“You’re offended?” He actually looks surprised, cocking his head a tiny bit to the side. “Do you want me to like you?”

Your eyes widen—crap. “No, no, I just—that was a little mean. I mean, I, um, don’t want people to hate me, obviously, but, uh…we’re getting off-topic.”

Very smooth, self, very smooth.

Loki seems to be mildly amused.

“Hill said you were in therapy,” you quickly snap, frustrated at yourself for slipping. “But you’ve been under my desk for the past hour and a half. What’s that about?”

“See, if you hadn’t been so eager to electrocute me, I could’ve explained myself.”

“Well, what else was I supposed to—”

“Anyways,” he butts in, shaking his head, like you are the problem here, the little—

“I’m avoiding it, I thought that would be obvious.”

“Why avoid it?” You ask, and a tiny part of you is actually genuinely curious; “Therapy’s good for you.”

“I don’t particularly enjoy talking about my feelings.”

You gasp. “No…you??”

Halfway through your first snort of laughter and a chunk of snow hits you across the face.

“What the hell,” you sputter, swiping the wet slosh off your cheek. “It’s fucking August, Loki, why—”

“Beyond your comprehension,” he hums, clearly pleased with himself. “I already told you. I don’t like talking about my emotions.”

“That’s really unhealthy. Someday you’ll just explode and you’ll be miserable.”

He points at his chest with a small smile. “I’ll keep all my emotions right here, thank you. Then one day, I’ll just…die.”

“Great plan.”

“It seems to be doing just fine, given that they truly believe that I am in there, pouring out my darkest secrets to a stranger—”

“Who is in there then?”

You blinked—you blinked—and poof, there’s two Lokis.

Two.

Exactly the same, perfect clones of each other, both slightly spreading their arms in a silent what do you think?

You don’t know what to think.

“You drugged me,” you decide, blinking again in confusion and backing away. “Yeah, you drugged me, and I’m hallucinating.”

The two gods shake their heads. “Beyond your comprehension,” they repeat, a strange echo to their voices as they meld.

“So…” you rub your eyes, trying to figure out just what the hell is going on. “They’re talking to a clone of you?”

“A rather emotional one,” Loki laughs, waving a hand and the other clone fizzles into nothing. “I’m giving them the story they want, telling them all about my deranged pleas for attention, how my complete isolation led me to become starved for power and resort to seeking out drastic measures to obtain it…”

“That just makes you seem worse. You get that, right?”

He nods with a small shrug. “They have their ideas of who I am. Nothing at this point could change that, so I might as well speed along the process.”

“So that’s not the truth, then?”

“What?”

“You…being the villain.” None of this makes sense. I mean, it went downhill after you tased him, but then one snowball and two Loki’s later, it’s actually gotten worse. “The stereotypical villain, I mean.”

Loki pauses, gaze drifting away from you to the floor. “What makes you think that, mortal?”

“Just the way you said it,” you explain, “made me think that your clone is in there lying. I dunno, you just made it sound like a lie.”

The god laughs, a small, halfhearted chuckle that might even be able to be called nervous, and he pulls himself to his feet.

You catch him shoot a quick glance at your taser resting beside you, just in case.

“God of lies, da—”

The door swings open.

“I CAN EXPLAIN,” you nearly yell, bolting to the door and nearly running into agent Hill.

“What?” Papers fluttering to the ground around her, she gives you a look of pure bewilderment.

Then you turn around and understand why.

“Explain what, darling?”

Waitwaitwait.

That’s not Loki’s voice—oh god, you can recognise his voice now??

The man laughs and this time it’s you who’s doing the staring: that’s not Loki.

This man is blond.

Wearing a normal business suit.

Sitting on the edge of your desk.

“Forgive her,” he chuckles, pushing off your desk and coming to help pick up Hill’s paperwork, hand coming to rest on your back when he stands. “She’s a bit of a klutz, isn’t she?”

You gape.

Yes, get that dying fish look in your head, because at this point your head is as good as chopped off and stuck on ice.

“I’m sorry,” Hill slowly says to you, a smile starting to appear on her lips. “I didn’t know you had a meeting right now.”

Still staring.

“Oh, no, no,” Loki—or whoever this is—chuckles politely, “I stopped by unannounced, blame me if anyone.”

“And you are…”

“Laing.” Loki flashes a smile. You gape some more. “Doctor Robert Laing.”

Hill shakes his—Loki’s—hand. “Were you a new hire?”

“Ah, no…” Loki’s hand slips to your waist and you would scream, were it not for the inability for you to even lift your tongue. “I’m just here for her, just stopping by. I’m her, ah, well…you know. I’m her’s, she’s mine, that sort of thing.”

Wait. 

WHAT—

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

hope you enjoyed, please reblog and feel free to send me ideas!

~ masterlist link in my bio ~

loki tags: @bluediamond007 @himitoshi @drakesfiance @destiel1597 @dangertoozmanykids101 @archy3001 @jcalpha1 @yzssie @skullvieplu @forthesnakeofdragons @skulliebythesea @wegingerangelica @storiesfrommirkwood @agarwaeneth @adaliamalfoy @laurfangirl424 @paradisaicsam @fitzsimmons-is-forever @ladylokimischief @katelinwrites @tarynkauai @polaristrange @loavesofmeat @canadian-ravenpuff-multishipper @lou-makes-me-strong @holyn0vak @chocolatealmondmillk @swtnrholland @kenzieam @jessiejunebug  @catticas @the-republic-and-face-of-texas @doralupin01 @whitewitchdown @atomiccharmer @falconfeather23435 @babygirlicecream @avengrcs @vethrvolnir2 @bookgirlunicorn @wabisabigrl @myhealingstar @khaleesi-marvel @ei77777 @spacecrumbs @scarlettghost13 @rocks-are-pretty-odd @confessionsofastrugglingteen @easilydistractedwriter @arttasticgreatnessoftheawesome77 @fluffyllamaswearinghats @milktearose @lcyouinhell @h0tshotholland @dontmesswithmemundane @southsidesarcasticwriter @helnik-s @lilith-akemi @fire-in-her-veinz @unlikelysamwinchesteronahunt @mischievousbellerina @kcd15 @mellowgirl01 @lokislilcaribbeanprincess @allthingzhiddleston @scorpionchild81 @lokixme @blue-automne @galaxycharmed @devilbat @kangaroobunny @end-up-well @planetariumx @sarcsep @mrfandomtastic @amaru163 @im-way-too-many-fandoms @caswinchester2000 @kybaeza @wester-than-west @vintagesunshinebitch @adefectivedetective @poetic-nikolai @moonduhsted @kerri-masson @iamverity @innaminitus @spnbarnes @narcissxblack @woohoney @anxiousamandapanda @padmeisgay @authordreaming13 @lokisironthrone @theunknowinglys @highfuncti0ningfangirl @epicfallenismine @stubby-toe-589331 @fandomnerdsarecool @retrofantasyland @arch-venus25 @forever-trapped-in-my-dreams @littleredstarfish @marshyrebelcloud

[thebibliomancer]

Essential Avengers: Avengers #232: And Now... Starfox!

June, 1983

“From Titan with love... Starfox!”

oh god no

Err. Anyway.

Last time on Avengers Z, the Avengers were bad enough dudes and lady dudes to rescue the president from wooden dopplegangers. The sinister and badly dressed Plantman (not to be confused with a Mega Man boss) summoned a giant-sized man-shaped swamp thing to battle the Avengers. They were doing a decent job fighting it when Starfox crashed his spaceship into it in his rush to join the Avengers.

And now, what happens after that.

Hawkeye is a terrible patient.

So also last time, a ceiling fell on Hawkeye’s leg and it be broke. He’s apparently the kind of dude who thinks its more manly to refuse anesthetic so She-Hulk has to literally pin him down long enough for Ordinary Doctor Donald Blake to cast it up.

And wow, that cast goes all the way up!

Where did you break your leg, Clint? At the sternum?

Actually this reminds me of Avengers: Earth’s Mightiest Heroes because Hawkeye got his arm snaked and in-this-version-a-paramedic Jane Foster was asked to look at it but Hawkeye was similarly uncooperative there.

I wonder if that was an intentional reference or whether an accurate portrayal of Clint’s sparking personality just gets you there naturally.

But with the casting call done, Dr. Donald Blake makes to leave, making a point to mention how lucky that he was in town instead of in Chicago where he supposedly lives.

THUS Thor’s secret identity is secure forever.

Wasp and Captain America take Ordinary Doctor Donald Blake to the elevator to show him out but really, he just transforms back to Thor in the elevator.

Because Cap and Wasp already know his secret identity. As does Dra- oh wait, he’s dead. As does Iron Man.

In fact, after Cap mentions he doesn’t think he’ll ever get used to seeing Dr. Donald Blake transform, Thor mentions very few mortals have ever seen the change.

Thor: “E’en Iron Man -- with whom I did share the secret of my dual life -- seldom watched me assume my godlike form. I believe it disturbed him.’

Wasp: “Uh-huh.”

Uh-huh is right. That’s a weird, random character beat! I wonder why it bothered Tony. Is it the god part? Transformation in general? Would it bother him to watch Bruce Banner turn into the Hulk? Or Captain Marvel/old broke version and Rick Jones chaaaaange places?

I’m intrigued. And yet there’s no further information. Hmm.

Anyway, the three founding or retroactively made a founding Avengers pass through two sets of ultra-security doors because obviously the thing in your base you most want to protect is your conference table.

Its got the cool, personalized chairs. Don’t judge.

As always, I wonder what symbols the other Avengers get.

Wasp delayed the resumption of the Avengers meeting (because it got interrupted by presidential ransom situation last issue) by a half hour because she wanted to run some things past Thor and Cap.

Wasp: “After all, we are the only core members on active duty and... well... I wanted to ask you both first... should I step down as Avengers chairwoman?”

Thor asks if she feels unduly burdened by the job but she says no, in fact it makes her feel so aliiiiiiiiiiive.

Cap: “Then stick with it, Jan! You’ve been doing a fine job! What on Earth made you even think of stepping down? Surely you don’t blame yourself for Iron Man leaving -- ?”

Surely in fact, she does do.

That weird call they got from an Iron Man quitting the team has shaken her. She probably thinks its because of Wasp dumping him. And in fairness, Tony ghosting the team happened not very long after that. But its not actually related.

Also apparently, Captain Marvel (the new cool one) was made a full active member and not an in-training to fill the vacancy Iron Man left. But now Hawkeye has gotten injured and there are no reserve members available.

Hercules is off doing him knows what. Beast is with the Defenders. Wonder Man is on the West Coast, presumably trying to make it in Hollywood. Vision and Scarlet Witch are trying to be civilians.

Wasp: “We used to have too many members around. Now we may not have enough!”

Yeah, ever since the roster shake-up that was soon followed by Hank’s No Good Very Bad Day, the Avengers have had a bit of a difficulty in keeping the team at good numbers.

Dammit, Hank!

Thor suggests, hey, we have Eros of Titan hanging around asking to be made a member. Why not... let him?

Thor: “Perhaps we should induct the brash Eros! He is swift -- and nearly as strong as an Asgardian!”

Cap: “Yes, but is he Avengers material? Does he have the proper training?”

Wasp: “Training! That’s it! We could try him out as an Avenger-in-training! It worked for Captain Marvel! She was almost totally unused to super-powers when she came to us, but she developed into a peach of an Avenger! With a little on-the-job training, I’ll bet Eros would fit in, too!”

So she calls the White House and asks if the president is back from his kidnapping yet. She has networking strings to pull.

And this honestly brightens her right up. Being group leader really does make her feel so aliiiiiiiiiiive. That and being able to call in favors from the government.

Twenty-six minutes of calling in favors later, Wasp reconvenes the meeting, this time with special guest Eros.

She asks why he wants to be an Avenger.

Eros: “Why not?”

This gives Hawkeye an anger and he bangs the table and also accidentally bangs his broken leg.

Eros decides to expand on his answer and says that he’s a lover of adventure and what better way to seek it than as an Avenger? He’s already aided them in the past so they already know of him.

Thor: “Aye! Against the threat of your mad brother, Thanos!”

Eros: “Too true. But I believe your brother Loki has also given the Avengers trouble hasn’t he?”

Wasp has to interrupt and tell the two to keep family matters out of the conversation. She makes a better moderator than some.

Eros: “You are quite right, Wasp! I hold no one -- god or man -- responsible for the actions of relatives! I seek but your fellowship! Indeed, I can think of no assemblage so appealing... so charming... anywhere in the cosmos!”

Wasp, Captain Marvel, and She-Hulk seem to approve of this answer.

... WAIT ARE YOU USING YOUR CHARM POWERS ON THEM? EROOOOOOOOOOOOOS!!!

Anyway, since Hawkeye is out of action-

Hawkeye: “What do you mean, ‘out of action’? Who says I am?”

Cap(tain America) says he is and tells him he can’t be expected to charge into action with his leg in a cast. Which Hawkeye sadly agrees.

Anyway, since Hawkeye is out of action, Wasp decides that the Avengers can accomodate Eros as an Avenger-in-training. But the government did have one condition for letting his alien man become an Avenger.

He needs a codename.

Wasp: “Frankly, the president was hesitant to approve of anyone named Eros. He would rather you were called something less provocative in public.”

Hey, fuck you, Reagan.

But Wasp has an idea.

Wasp: “You’re a pretty foxy guy... and you’ve been out among the stars... how about ‘Starfox!’”

Good god, Wasp. Did you really just name this man Spacehunk? You’ve gone mad with power.

Also, I jumped the gun last post. I didn’t realize that Wasp comes up with his codename here so I was using Starfox to refer to him already.

Also also, he has a fox emblem on his shirt. Why does he do that if he wasn’t Starfox yet? What does the fox represent in Titanian culture??

Eros: “Starfox? I don’t know... Is this necessary?”

Captain America: “Well, it could make things easier, and you’d still be Eros to your friends. After all, my real name isn’t Captain America!”

Eros: “It isn’t?”

Hah.

I adore that last exchange.

Imagine the incredulity in the tone. ‘I thought that Earth names were Just Like That.’

Anyway, Eros accepts the name Spacehunk Starfox and the position of in-training so Wasp decides to get him started right away.

Remember that thing with the president and the wood men? Happened like an hour ago?

Well, there’s a Navy task force tracking the submarine which was spotted escaping from the scene and they’ve requested Avengers help. But, eh, why send the whole team?

So Wasp sends Thor, Captain Marvel, and Starfox-in-training.

And in fairness! That’s a trio that can handle a whole heck of a lot with their respective powers!

So off they go.

Starfox: “Duty and glory, Thor! Songs shall be written about this day -- even if I must write them myself!”

You know. That’s actually a very good attitude to have. Eros will be the fanfiction he wants to see in the world.

With that issue handled, Cap(tain America) and Wasp head off to take care of some other business.

Leaving She-Hulk and Hawkeye with only each other as company.

Hah.

On their way to the mission, Captain Marvel zooms all around, practicing her cornering in flight. As a new superhero... like its been under a month, I think? Captain Marvel still thinks flying is the neatest thing.

And she’s right!

But she’s also discovered a new ability. Since her energy form is made of energy and she has control over energy. Instead of flying around as a vaguely her shaped glowing blur, she can concentrate to create a light image of herself, why not!

She has made herself harder to draw but easier to portray!

Thor: “Your radiance rivals that of the golden apples of immortality!”

Captain Marvel: “I’ll have to take your word for that!”

Hah.

She zooms over to where Starfox is flying. Captain Marvel has been eyeing him throughout the book, which Wasp has been assuming was because he’s a space hunk.

But maybe she just wanted to learn more about Captain Mar-Vell because that’s what she asks Starfox about.

Starfox: “He was a gentle warrior... a noble soul. He was a true hero... Worthy of rank and name!”

I guess the description or the sadness Starfox still has at Mar-Vell’s death makes Monica feel like shit, like maybe she isn’t worthy, so she zooms ahead to let the navy know the Avengers are on their way.

Starfox: “Have I offended her?”

Thor: “Eros, I begin to wonder if your reputation with the ladies is truly deserved.”

Hah.

But also: If you have magical fuck-me powers you don’t need to actually be charming, I guess? Dammit, Starfox!

Captain Marvel arrives on the deck of the navy task force flagship as a bolt of lighting (SHAZAM!), alarming the navy in two ways.

First, lightning. Its just so loud! But second, wait the Avengers only sent one person?

Captain Marvel goes nah I got Thor and Spacehunk but they’re slowpokes. Not moving the speed of light. Imagine.

Admiring Admiral: I don’t know who the redhead is, but I’d sail into Hades itself with Thor in my crew!

Its fun the insight we get into how respected and beloved Thor is. I don’t think that’s the case anymore with modern Thor. The marvel citenzry has just become jaded to the cool hammer man.

The admiral explains the situation. That they’re chasing the submarine seen in the area of the presidential ransom attempt. But its hiding in an undersea canyon that navy frogmen kero kero can’t reach and that its somehow been deflecting depth charges.

The admiral was going to wait for navy subs to arrive but hey, if the Avengers want to try, this is their book.

Meanwhile, in aforementioned sinister submarine, the horticultural horror... Plantman! Nah, just kidding. He’s a goofus and I will point and laugh.

His cool sub lets him pre-explode the depth charges before they reach his sub but even he doesn’t want to tangle with trident-class submarines so he wants to skedaddle. And if the navy is blocking his way, the navy gotta pay.

He activates his PLANT RAY which is a real thing, look it up, and energizes the kelp in the undersea canyon.

The kelp reaches up like a kraken, a kelpken, and starts trying to pull the navy ships under.

Thor: “‘Tis an attack by yet another form of plant! Our unknown foe has struck again! Stand you back... the son of Odin shall end this threat!”

And then Thor jumps into the ocean, leading a confused Starfox to ask whether Thor needs to breath.

Captain Marvel helpfully informs him and the audience that Thor can hold his breath for hours.

Thanks, Monica!

And then some kelp yanks Starfox and then Captain Marvel off the ship.

Meanwhile, a very expensive Manhattan apartment occupied by a grumpy Tony Stark.

Tony Stark: “Why waste good money getting a T.V. remote control fixed, when I can do it myself faster an’ better? Hah! When I’m done with it, it’ll do more’n change channels... it’ll walk the blasted dog!”

... Tony, how though?

And do you have a dog?

What is going on in your mind?

His remote repair reverie is interrupted by a binging and a bonging on his chamber door. Only this and nothing more.

He grouses about the interruption but HEY ITS HIS FAVORITE PEOPLE! Its Wasp and Captain America!

They’ve been stalking him, a little.

The pressing matters they had to attend to was running down a list of homes owned by Tony and searching them one by one to find him.

He’s happy to see them though and offers them some morning whiskey. Or bourbon. Or perhaps chocolate soda.

Look, I googled eyeopener and its booze you drink in the morning to wake up although I’m pretty sure its afternoon now and if you need to drink booze to wake up, you might want to consider limiting your intake actually. Especially for Tony Stark who had an entire story arc about alcoholism. Dammit Tony!

Wasp: “Eye-opener?! Tony Stark, where’s your mind? We’ve been worried sick about you! No one’s been able to find you for days on end -- you haven’t answered Avengers emergency calls -- and when you did call this morning it was to resign!”

Tony Stark: “Now jus’ hold yer horses! Maybe I have been outta touch... but I’ve had my own ‘mergencies to handle! An’ I didn’t call you this morning! I don’t even know what you’re talking about!”

Iron Man: “He’s right! I’m the one who made that call!”

Imagine being someone who reads Avengers and not Iron Man. How blown would your mind be seeing Iron Man fly into a room Tony Stark is already in?

Somewhat, right? Somewhat.

Imagine being Captain America and Wasp and seeing Iron Man fly into a room where Tony Stark is when you know for sure that Iron Man and Tony Stark are the same guy.

Cap demands to know whats going on and who is in Tony’s armor.

Tony Stark: “Jus’ who he appears to be... Iron Man, my faithful armored companion and bodyguard... jus’ like it says in the Stark International press releases! Ya see, boys an’ girls, ol’ Uncle Tony has decided to quit the hero biz while he’s still ahead of the game! No more playin’ Iron Man for me! Nosirrebob! Time to let a younger man wear the boilerplate!”

Oh.... Tony.... if this only weren’t the perpetual superhero narrative, you might be able to bow out gracefully.

And its not like this is gracefully anyway. As indicated by the charmingly tousled look, the slurred speech and the morning drinking in the afternoon, Tony is quite drunk.

Wasp asks New Iron Man to confirm and he does. He clarifies that the reason he quit the Avengers is because he doesn’t feel experienced enough yet to hold his own on the team.

And apologizes for the confusion. The Iron Man helmet has voice modifying circuits so New Iron Man (secretly James Rhodes) sounded just like Old Iron Man (aka Tony Stark). He didn’t realize that the Avengers knew Tony’s secret so didn’t realize he’d just be creating an intriguing mystery prompting readers to check out the Iron Man book slash confuse the Avengers.

Tony Stark: “Yeah... I forgot to tell ya that Cap an’ the Wasp were in on the ol’ secret. Thor, too! Oh, well... no harm done!”

Then he drinks some more booze alcohol. Cap asks him doesn’t he think he’s had enough? And Tony is like hey no I don’t and don’t butt into my life kthx.

Wasp: “We don’t want to pry, Tony! We just don’t want to see you throw your life away... like Hank did.”

Tony Stark: “I am not Hank Pym, lady! I’m nothin’ like your ex-hubby! I don’t need your help -- an’ you don’t need mine! The Stark Foundation will pay the Avengers’ bills with or without me! So, if you’ll kindly get out of my life -- !”

Oof. Why does everyone Wasp dates turn out to be a jerk?

I assume she was just leaning into it the time she dated Havok. But otherwise, oof.

They really have no choice but to leave Tony to make his own bad decisions. At least he was responsible enough to get someone else in the Iron Man armor?

Geez though. Geez.

Hate seeing you like this, Tones.

Meanwhile, back in the Atlantic Ocean... Captain Marvel fairly casually assesses the situation of being dragged into the water.

Captain Marvel: “Never saw any kelp like this before! It grips tighter than an octopus, and it feels as tough as steel! I could just turn to some form of energy and slip out of it, but then it could grab some poor sailor!”

So instead she explodes, which she can do, shredding the kelp holding her.

Then off she goes to find how Starfox is faring.

He’s faring okay. Just casually punching some kelp like it ain’t no thing.

But since teamwork does make the dream work, she blasts the kelp for him. Starfox thanks her though also says that he could’ve kelped himself.

They discuss how they can hear each other perfectly well underwater thanks to SCIENCE! The science of water conducting sound. I find it a bit dubious but whatever. Not as dubious as the next bit.

Captain Marvel asks how Starfox is breathing underwater.

Starfox: “A thin shell of air clung to me as I was pulled under... due to the gravitic potential of my body, I suppose! It all relates to my flying abilities. I was surprised myself! This is the first time I’ve ever taken an ocean plunge!”

Fun way to discover that, huh!

Also, heck, how long does a thin shell of air last underwater? How shallowly do you breathe, man!?

-google- Huh, Wikipedia has this description of his powers using almost the exact words (although not the word order) from this scene. I feel that it does not come up much so this is the primary source.

It also says that he doesn’t need to breathe as much as a normal hooman. So that’s answered.

The two newest Avengers find Thor already has things well in hand freeing the propeller without need for any further kelp.

So all three Avengers surface (and Thor retrieves his helmet, which in a nice bit fell off when he dove into the water and just floated on the surface).

Thanks to ex-boat cop Monica Rambeau knowing navy semaphore, she recognizes the signal from the navy vessel that the enemy sub is making a run for it.

And since none of these three Avengers have trouble fighting underwater, Starfox suggests they give chase.

Plantman: “NO! Not the Avengers! Not again!”

Yes, again. Yes, always.

He shoots some anti-personnel torpedoes, hoping they’re enough to stop the Avengers.

“They’re not.”

Hah. I love when captions get sassy.

The Avengers soon are busting into the sub, breaking through bulkheads and coming for Plantman.

Plantman realizes that they’ll have him trapped in the control cabin in seconds. So he pulls the last resort lever that his silent partner told him to pull as a last resort.

Some manner of escape sphere forms around Plantman, launching him high into the stratosphere and capsizing the sub right on top of the Avengers.

I mean, they’re beefy. I’m sure they’ll be fine.

But no time to verify that, SCENE CHANGE.

Over on Central Park West, She-Hulk has carried Hawkeye all the way from Avengers’ Mansion to his apartment. On foot.

Dang! Mighty nice of her! Even Hawkeye points out that he could have gotten a cab.

(But do we believe that Hawkeye has money for a cab?)

After gently dumping Hawkeye on his couch, She-Hulk asks if he wants to have her stick around. She literally has nothing better to do today.

Hawkeye: “Will you get out of here and leave me alone!!”

She-Hulk huffs off in anger because this is a rude way to thank someone who helps you home.

Hawkeye even realizes that he shouldn’t have yelled “but I can’t stand to have anyone mother-hen me! Besides, I have things to do... important things!”

Yeah, Hawkeye does seem like the kind of guy who hates getting any help at all because men are self-reliant and junk. Toxic masculinityyyyyyy!

And the important things? I dunno! He calls his head of security workplace Cross Technological Enterprises and tells them to send a car for him.

That’s probably going to be a thing in another issue. God forbid it be a thing in another book. I’m not made of time. I’m still dreading West Coast Avengers where Hawkeye goes off and makes his own team. The jerk.

Okay, back to the plot.

Thor, Captain Marvel, and Starfox of course shake off a submarine imploding on their heads without much effort. Starfox is the most shaken by it. Guess the new guy isn’t used to submarine implosions lol.

Meanwhile, Plantman’s escape pod keeps escaping up, up, and away but mostly just up.

Then a prerecorded message from Plantman’s ‘silent partner’ and/or ‘mysterious benefactor’ plays.

Wizard: “Plant-Man! This is a recording. If you have been so stupid as to get yourself in a predicament where you needed to use the emergency handle, you are now hearing this message.”

“While I appreciated your aid in escaping prison, the equipment I gave you should be considered payment in full. I owe you nothing more than an explanation.”

“Thanks to my anti-gravity generators -- which you activated along with this module -- you will soon find yourself safely in orbit!”

Plantman: “In orbit!”

Wizard: “There, you will be of no further embarrassment to me or our ‘partnership’ as you so distastefully called it. You will be beyond harm... for as long as your oxygen holds out. Farewell!”

Oof. Ice cold.

Ice cold, the Wizard.

Captain Marvel phases through the pod floor to basically say the same thing.

Plantman begs her to save him from his own dumb decision making. She’s like huh look, I don’t really know about anti-gravity but I do have an idea.

Then she blows a hole in the side of the pod.

And the pressure difference blasts Plantman out of the pod, right through Captain Marvel who has turned into intangible energy.

Captain Marvel: “Don’t say I didn’t warn you!”

HAH!

That was mean, Monica. I love it.

But as Plantman hurtles screaming toward the ground, Thor catches him and tells him to stop screaming beside.

Thor: “Cease your cowardly whining! The Avengers do not wantonly kill their foes... not even such as you!”

These days though... well... probably still not wantonly? Depending on how you define it? Maybe during War of Realms though. The kid gloves came off then.

Starfox is loving this by the way. The whole thing that just happened.

Starfox: “What grand sport! Yes, I think I’m going to enjoy being an Avenger!”

‘Ha ha we made that guy think he was going to die!’

Also, Plantman’s outfit looked green and purple in the sub. I guess it was the lighting because its just jolly green now. But its still a terrible outfit.

Meanwhile, back at Avengers’ mansion, Wasp is back from Tony Stark locating duty! She-Hulk is back from being angry at Hawkeye duty!

She-Hulk mentions that she took Hawkeye to his apartment and for a loudmouth, he has a really nice apartment.

She-Hulk: “I wish I could find a nice apartment, but I’m still getting lost in this town. I don’t know where to begin looking.”

Wasp: “Well, if you’re so set on getting a place of your own, why don’t I give you a hand?”

Wasp is going to fulfill her delayed promise to take She-Hulk apartment hunting! And hey, why not focus her efforts on a friend that will let her help?

So Wasp changes into street clothes (or since we see her shrink later, its more that she changed her Wasp outfit and put clothes over it, which is almost like getting dressed in street clothes) and takes Jen out on the town.

Apparently, the Daily Bugle has the largest section on rentals and real estate of any New York paper. I guess they need something aside from diatribes about Spider-Man to attract subscribers.

Ben Urich’s award winning investigative journalism can’t pay all the bills.

Because this is the same New York which frustrated Tigra, some idiot immediately starts hitting on She-Hulk at the newsstand.

Some idiot: “‘Ey, beeg mama! I love that green body paint! You need any help removing it? Huh?”

She-Hulk: “Stuff it, creep! Or better yet -- stuff you!”

And she puts the garbage man in the garbage can. Where he belongs. While Wasp literally looks the other way.

She-Hulk: “Sorry, Jan, I just don’t care for men with fresh mouths. This sort of thing would never happen in California.”

Wasp: “Oh, fer shure...”

That sounds like the polite way of saying ‘Doubt.’ Surely there are sexist jerks everywhere?

Sadly for the She-Hulk Apartment Hunt, her expectations are also a little LA centric. You’re just not going to find an affordable condo with a hot-tub in New York.

Wasp asks what She-Hulk has against the free rent at Avengers Mansion with its built-in sauna that they’ve apparently always had but never mentioned.

Avengers Mansion is real nice!

She-Hulk says she can’t get behind the idea of living where she works but as someone who works from home its actually highly recommended! Although, She-Hulk’s situation is more ‘firemen live in the firehouse’ so it lacks the ‘don’t have to wear pants to work’ aspect.

Then the apartment hunt is interrupted by an incoming crossover slash a stampede.

She-Hulk grabs a random panicking passerby out of the crowd and asks whats going on but he can’t give a good answer.

She-Hulk: “Hot dog! I was hoping something would happen to break up the monotony. So far, this afternoon has been a big, dull...” -THUD-

First, I love She-Hulk’s enthusiasm for punching.

Also, hey, who put thin air in She-Hulk’s way!

There’s some kind of invisible barrier right across the sidewalk.

She-Hulk instantly decides that the thing to do is to TEAR INTO THE PAVEMENT TO SEE HOW DEEP IT GOES.

Instead of, y’know, feeling to see how wide it stretches.

Wasp tries blasting thin air too but to no avail.

Despite She-Hulk reminding everyone that “at close range, your sting can knock down a wall!”

And when she really tries, a whole house.

She-Hulk: “Wasp... This is impossible! We’re Avengers! Nothing can stop us!”

Wasp: “She-Hulk... I’ve the strangest feeling it just did.”

And apparently: this is to be continued in THE ANNIHILATION GAMBIT! Which is a crossover with Fantastic Four!

Which means I actually need to pop over to an Avengers Annual first because despite running into the invisible wall (Sue, is that you?) the Avengers are doing stuff on the Moon before getting involved.

I dunno. I’ll see when I get to it.

And you will too! Provided you follow @essential-avengers​! Also maybe like and reblog? Who can say.

[jcmorrigan]

In Defense of Archibald Snatcher

Oh, wow, we’re coming up on almost the sixth anniversary of The Boxtrolls, my favorite film of all time, and though the fandom for it seems to be either dead or in hibernation, I still have the torch lit.

I actually have been of the mindset of the opinion/s I’m about to present here for all those six years, but never really thought it prudent to lay them out until I recently had a friend I was recommending the film to who I warned about some of the elements considered “problematic” and I offhandedly mentioned that I could do a whole essay about why they don’t bother me and said friend replied with a desire to want to hear it because we share infodump for infodump, so here we go, I’m poking the hornet’s nest surrounding a controversial film with a dead fandom.

But if you were on Tumblr back in the heyday, you might’ve seen the reaction to this film when it first debuted. Specifically, what a lot of people honed in on wa that the villain, Archibald Snatcher, employed a dragsona to be able to push his agenda and implement his evil scheme. There was outrage. There were accusations. There was lambasting. And above it all, one question hovers: was this transphobic?

I want to start, before we get into the weeds, by saying that if you are anywhere on the LGBTQ+ spectrum and you were offended by this film or this character, your experiences are completely valid. I’m about to present the counterargument in language that assumes my take is fact for the purpose of not having to write fifty thousand clunky disclaimers, but analytical as this may be, it IS an opinion, and if you don’t think it’s right, then hey, that’s super valid, and I’m not gonna try and change your mind, because if you’re hurt, then you’re hurt! You just may want to nope out of this post right now because I’m about to lay out my observations and thoughts to the contrary of the accusations of this being homo/transphobic.

First of all, the obvious facet that comes to mind is how strange it is that we only ever saw the word “transphobia” put on this phenomenon rather than “homophobia” when using a female alter ego as a disguise or a performance art is not the same as being a woman assigned male at birth. One only needs to take a look over at RuPaul’s Drag Race to see examples of this culture. Lots of gay men wearing dresses. No women perceived male.

All the same, I will say that on the surface, adding any kind of queercoding to the story’s villain, who the audience is supposed to boo and hiss at, looks really, really bad on paper. However you interpret it, Snatcher is definitely queercoded. He openly flirts with the man he’s trying to trick as a means of getting what he wants, he displays sincere enjoyment of wearing the dress, and he runs the gamut of flamboyant hand gestures. But if you dig a little further, there’s even more to the story: his tale is one of a man who desires to pass as one of the elite class in his society, but is held back by something he can’t change about himself no matter how he denies it.

Let’s look at the rest of his story. Snatcher is in pursuit of the White Hat: the ultimate status symbol. To that end, he’s decided to otherize the Boxtroll population of the town and play upon the culture shock in Cheesebridge to convince the humans of the “upper world” that the Boxtrolls are predatory monsters who must be killed. This sounds like a pretty black-and-white good-and-evil scenario, right? You’ve got your population of innocent sweethearts being attacked and your genocidal racist orchestrating their destruction. But there’s a third layer still: Lord Portley-Rind, the chief White Hat himself. Lord PR is actually the worst of the lot. It’s because he doesn’t accept Snatcher that Snatcher feels he has to resort to this tactic. He demonstrates open hatred of the Boxtrolls and of Snatcher (”I’m not sure who should be more worried: the Boxtrolls or us!”). There are implications in how he treats his daughter that he’s a textbook sexist who believes there are men’s roles and women’s roles in society and nary the twain shall cross. And he’s the rich guy controlling the entire city and letting children’s hospitals and crumbling bridges go to waste by spending the budget on frivolous cheese. In short, Lord PR is basically the ur-example of a nightmarish fictional Republican (and oh, how I WISH he hadn’t been so prophetic).

I’m not saying Snatcher was justified or good. No. He’s in no way redeemable. But over the course of his interactions with Lord PR, you can see just how much society’s elites treat him as inhuman or like a dirty buffoon. He’s looked down upon, he’s insulted even when he’s doing the “service” Lord PR desires, he’s rejected until he’s gone above and beyond his contract and I think it’s even a little bit implied that Lord PR would’ve reneged on the whole deal if the mob hadn’t cheered for Snatcher in the end. So what you have is a prim and proper billionaire who subscribes to gender roles telling a man of the lower class, obviously economically downtrodden, that he doesn’t deserve what Lord PR has.

The idea of meritocracy is woven throughout the film. Listening to the speech in the background of Snatcher’s anaphylactic attack, while the visuals are focused on Eggs rescuing Fish, you can hear Snatcher rambling about how his father told him that if you work hard, you will receive a White Hat, but he worked hard all his life and got nothing. One of the White Hats literally says he got his through being rich. It’s not hard to infer that Snatcher has figured out how broken the system is and realized the only way to win the game is to cheat.

But there’s still one more thing holding him back from his victory, something that actually trips him up when he achieves what he wanted. Cheese is presented as another status symbol: the rich eat it and are connoisseurs of its flavor. Snatcher is deathly allergic to it. The goal he’s chasing, he can’t even have without threat to his own life. His reaction is to pretend he isn’t allergic and to expose himself to having allergic reactions on the regular to show how much he’s ready to become part of the elites. I’ll reiterate: Archibald Snatcher wants to join the elites, but is held back because of something about himself he cannot change that only matters because the upper crust said it should.

Okay. So we’ve established the man is gay, or somewhere on the queer spectrum. How is this not really, really horrible?

Because the narrative invites you to feel some sympathy for him. No, not for his actions or any secret soft side or tragic backstory (that’s a job for the fans), but because he is chasing a dream he cannot attain. Perhaps the film’s biggest shortcoming is how little consequence comes to Lord PR in the end, because Lord PR, for all intents and purposes, is the worse villain on the board. Snatcher’s ploy is to take the class below the one he inhabits and paint its members as the bad guys: a nuisance that must be exterminated for the betterment of society. And we’ve seen this. We’ve seen plenty of real-life examples of have-nots turning on have-lessers because the haves benefit from oppressed groups infighting and being distracted from who holds the money and the power. A lot of times, you see that while intersectionality is definitely something we need to pay attention to, racism, sexism, and homophobia are not concepts that are all explicitly linked. If you experience one, that doesn’t mean you don’t project one or two of the others on other people - particularly if you’re trying to make yourself feel better about the discrimination you face.

When you look at the hierarchy, Snatcher is, I reiterate, a very bad person. But he’s also a victim. Not as much of a victim as the poor Boxtrolls, who get the malice trickling down from both the Red Hats and the White Hats, but he is a victim. We see him mocked, laughed at, turned away. And though he’s not redeemable, there are aspects in which he is sympathetic.

But what about Frou Frou? What about that particular disguise?

Well, for one, it’s used to make yet another allegorical statement. Snatcher is able to get attention paid to him if he weaponizes female sexuality - though it is a very shallow attention that largely results in the straight men of the town swallowing his propaganda while also objectifying him. Most of the comments made on Frou Frou are slimy, smarmy “compliments” on her body from the White Hats. Lord PR’s wife harbors a distinct distaste for Frou Frou because her husband most certainly prefers ogling Frou Frou to actually paying attention to their marriage. Frou Frou is a propaganda vehicle to make it look like more than one person is on the same page as Snatcher; Snatcher himself drives the action of his scheme and gets the dirty work done.

It’s also worth noting that if you take away the implications, villains using alter egos to trick their nemeses is a tale as old as time, from sea witch Ursula making herself more supermodel-esque in order to marry the prince to mythological Loki actually crossdressing much in the same vein in order to fool the Frost Giants. There’s a reason disguise masters and shapeshifters are intriguing villain archetypes: because we’re always a little bit afraid that someone isn’t who they say they are, and because - yeah, I’m about to go here - I think we all wish we could shift shape ourselves to take on new forms that suit the goals we’re trying to accomplish, even if that means “fooling” others. So it’s reasonable to think Laika wasn’t aware that there was any queercoding to even be had here - but I do think the crew was aware, and not in a malicious way.

However, watching Snatcher’s scenes as Frou Frou, there’s something that comes across in his character that you don’t see so often when he’s presenting male: he’s legitimately having fun. He dances, he flirts with the crowd, he adds more flourishes to his speech, he gets sassy. Frou Frou is a means for him to express himself, to allow himself to be feminine when he has built his philosophy on needing to do “what a man does” (he repeats this at least twice) in order to achieve greatness. He can be a little more himself when he’s Frou Frou, even though Frou Frou isn’t him. Taking a new identity that’s allowed the other half of the gender roles allowed in Cheesebridge (which runs on a binary because it’s run by the White Hats) lets him act a little less like what he needs to be to be taken seriously and a little more like he has freedom.

Put this back in context of the greater narrative: given all the parallels we’ve seen, it’s safe to assume that Cheesebridge, as a whole, is not accepting of deviations from gender roles, whether it’s being open and proud of your LGBTQ+ identity or simply wearing the clothes that don’t belong to your gender. Snatcher is taking an enormous gamble here by using Frou Frou at all. On one hand, it’s a calculated risk; he knows if he can appeal to Lord PR’s unchecked sexist libido, he can secure another avenue to being heard. On the other, however, it’s not really much of a leap to say this is something he wants to do, someone he wants to be more like, and isn’t allowed to, and since he’s cheating at the game anyway, he might as well go all the way and do what he wants with his life.

I’ve seen a lot of people take issue with the scene where he reveals himself to Lord PR and comparing it to some actual homophobic/transphobic media. And again, if that still stands to you as your primary analysis and emotional reaction, then feel free to turn away, reject my analysis, and know your thoughts and feelings are completely valid. But I think this scene differs from your usual “person with male parts tricked you into thinking they were a woman” scene in a couple ways.

For one, Snatcher decides to out himself on his own. To Lord PR, it’s when he’s got nothing left to lose. Again, when he realizes the game is broken and the odds are against him, he takes control and decides to be himself a little more. Now everyone knows he likes to act a dragsona because he wanted them to. But also, earlier on, when he revealed himself to Eggs, it was again on purpose. Eggs didn’t figure him out. Snatcher needed Eggs to know the level of the threat he was dealing with: that he was the person Eggs has been running from since the start and is no less dangerous in a dress. It’s always been of his own volition. There’s no “I thought you knew” or disrobing to see a body that doesn’t match expectations - Eggs ripping Snatcher’s wig off is maybe a little iffier, but again, in context, that’s him trying to show Snatcher’s identity, not as a man but as Archibald Snatcher, to expose the corruption, and Snatcher actually plays it completely off because he’s that good of an actor.

Which brings me to my second point. There’s only one person who reacts in an “Oh, gross!” manner to this revelation, and it’s Lord Portley-Rind. The one we’ve established is sexist, homophobic, and your textbook Rich White Straight Cis Man. The one at the top of the food chain. The one who’s been objectifying Snatcher and acting like a slobbering pervert about Frou Frou from the beginning. The homophobe realizes he has been a little gay. The sexist realizes his objectifying a particular person he perceived female has consequences. And this is why to me, that scene is actually hilarious. Because I don’t feel like I’m laughing at Snatcher’s expense. I’m laughing because Lord PR just got called OUT, and this is exactly the kind of discomfort that is karmic given how he’s treated his daughter, his wife, and everyone in his city who’s needed him.

Cycling back to when Snatcher outs himself at the ball, Eggs doesn’t really seem to care that there’s a gender-role-play involved here. His concern is not that this is actually a man; his concern is that it’s specifically the person who he knows is trying to ruin everything. Same with Winnie when Eggs passes it on. Eggs trying to reveal Snatcher to the crowd doesn’t even begin with “Frou Frou is fake,” but a line I will never forget: “Archibald Snatcher has lied to you all.” Not even drawing attention yet to the fact that he’s in the room. Starting out by having everyone remember that guy they are all sure ISN’T there and pointing out he’s bad news.

To look at Lord Portley-Rind’s “Oh my God! I regret so much!” as a dig at Snatcher is to say that Lord Portley-Rind is the lens through which we should be viewing this story, which it most certainly isn’t. The lens is Eggs and Winnie. Adjacent lenses are Fish, Shoe, and Jelly. Lord Portley-Rind is an antagonist to every single character in this film save the other White Hats.

Which is why if this film falls flat anywhere, it’s in letting Lord Portley-Rind get away without consequence. I think I can take a guess as to why this primarily happened: it needed to wrap up in a little under two hours, and dismantling systematic oppression and abuse of socioeconomic power can’t be done in a two-hour escapade. I still wish he were at least villainized a little more, as that’s where the narrative was leading up to that point. One of his earliest scenes with Winnie foreshadows that he will have to choose between her and the hat, and it takes him two tries to make the right choice. This story, until the very last act, has not supported him being a character to like or sympathize with, even in such subtle ways as Trout and Pickles stealing his hat and running around with it to taunt Snatcher - showing that a symbol is really only a symbol, and doesn’t indicate your worth. Anyone can put on a hat. Lord PR has just been brought onto an equal footing with them, if only for a moment.

Okay, so why have this whole three-layer narrative anyway? Couldn’t we have made this story more clear-cut between the Boxtrolls and White Hats, with no queercoded villain to get in between?

Yes...but I’m not sure that would have been best for the viewing audience. And there’s plenty of precedent as to why Laika thought it was a move for the better.

Queercoded villains are in every aspect of our fictional and fandom lives. Here’s a bitter pill to swallow: all your favorite Disney villains are queercoded. All of them. “But Frollo’s arc is about - “ Being a man in a religious system afraid of being tainted as sinful for being attracted to the wrong person. “Gaston, though, is - “ Very chummy with LeFou, and I’m talking the animated versions. They’re all colorful, flamboyant, foppish for the men and full of socially-unacceptable strength for the women. These were the cornerstones of our childhood nostalgia and characters we still feel culturally attached to.

It’s not just in Disney. Are you a fan of musical theater? Well, then your favorite villain probably got a big song and dance in which they wore some glitter. Classic lit? Google the name of your favorite literary canon villain and “queer theory” and see what happens.

I don’t think we can really say this is good or bad. On one hand, it’s not great that a marginalized group can only see themselves in the character we’re supposed to hate. On the other, though, we don’t always hate that character. Villains hold a unique place in our culture. They do bad things, horrible things, but the story can’t take place without a conflict, and we like when that conflict has a name and a cool design such as a tall, imposing sorcerer/witch in flowing robes - or perhaps a tall, graceful man in a long red coat and a towering crooked top hat.

I’ve had lots of friends and trusted Internet reviewers talking about how queercoding in villains can actually be really empowering. If you’re a fan of the villain, you get to see a power fantasy in which someone who has something very big in common with you gets to enact karma on others for wronging them! You get to wear the cool robes, sing the fun song, do things that are not really legal or acceptable! I think a great analogy is if you check out the book “Dead Blondes and Bad Mothers” by Sady Doyle. It’s primarily about sexism rather than queer issues (though it does touch upon them!), but examines how women throughout pop culture and storytelling history have always been the witch, the monster, the demon, and how that sucks, but it also means that women have a great pile of fictional power fantasies to pick from to indulge in. It’s the same principle. I myself may not be same-gender-attracted, but I am asexual, and still waiting on my glamorous villain who uproots society as revenge for being forced to do something analogous to having a sexual relationship...*taps wristwatch*

Meanwhile, queercoding is not as prevalent in heroes. And I think that’s where everything’s tripping on its own feet. Because a gay villain among a bunch of straight heroes does look pretty bad. Are some of the heroes queercoded as well, though? Well, that’s just realistic diversity. People are gay, and there happen to be some good ones and some evil ones here. I don’t think Snatcher’s dragsona is entirely unproblematic, but I do think it could have been mitigated a lot with more implications that Eggs and Winnie might be queer in some way (and believe me, I choose to interpret them that way, because the more the merrier).

The thing is that in pop culture as of late, there seems to be a trend to scrub away all villainous queercoding because it’s seen as a black-and-white issue. To go back to the Disney villains, do you feel like the live-action recreations of Jafar, Scar, and Gaston are missing a certain je ne sais quoi? Well, think about it through this lens and it might be that you savez quoi after all. They’ve all been made incredibly straight as of late, with off-the-record actor confirmations about having obsessive crushes on the film heroines. I can’t speak to why this has happened; there’s a lot of history behind any given social movement, and I haven’t managed to really unpack this one. “Blame Tumblr” is too easy; I would want to know who were the loudest voices, why they said what they said, and what was the intended accomplishment, not to mention if this had built on other social-media or real-life platforms over the years and was influenced by any outside source by news or marketing. I can’t say why queercoded villains are being burned; I can only say it’s happening. And it was happening big-time in 2014, when The Boxtrolls was released.

I also feel like I would be remiss to mention that The Boxtrolls is based on “Here Be Monsters,” which I believe to be one of the worst books I’ve ever read, bar none. That version of the story has...pretty much everything that’s perceived to be in the film version’s text as problematic. Frou Frou is presented as something to laugh at Snatcher about throughout, largely because everything about Snatcher is presented to make him seem gross or like a buffoon. There’s a whole scene of the hero rifling through his desk to find soiled underwear. Not to mention that the original purpose of Frou Frou in the text was to manipulate the town’s women by dictating the fashion trends they should follow and the beliefs they should hold in order to fit in. This is something that does need commentary on it, but in that text in particular, it seems like the women are silly and easily swayed, and that they’re the town’s weak link because they’re slaves to fashion. The Boxtrolls completely flips this around so that the town’s weak link re: Frou Frou is the rich MEN who objectify women, particularly the men that happen to be in charge of the whole town, and looking at that divide alone tells me how much care was put into this adaptation at every level.

So why’d I do this, besides having a friend who wanted to read it? Because Archibald Snatcher is legitimately one of my favorite fictional characters. Yeah, I know, he’s a horrible person and terribly racist, and no, I don’t think his demonizing an entire people is anything to be emulated. But on one hand, there are places where I not only empathize but identify with him, particularly where it comes to living out the majority of one’s life trying to live up to a meritocracy - I did everything right, so why am I not on top? He’s also just fun and satisfying to me. He’s the exact brand of evil I eat up. He’s quippy, flamboyant, sadistic to a point, and altogether enjoying his job way too much. Even though he isn’t in power all that long, he is a power fantasy for me, too - wishing I had his talent to talk my way into others’ hearts by saying the right thing, and maybe cultivating a little bit of that I didn’t realize I had (but not to use for evil purposes). I loved him from the moment he turned up because of his sheer dynamic presence - his drawn-out vowels, his sinister smile, his silver-tongued manipulations - and to this day I find him an inspiring character when it comes to writing fiction, both in the realms of fanfiction and original villain creation. You could say he’s a comfort character to me. And maybe this has been the delusional rambling of a woman trying to protect a character she likes for surface reasons by spelling out what look like analytical points of discussion.

But I don’t think Laika was trying to be mean-spirited or homo/transphobic in their character creation. I think they were trying to make an engaging villain who had some layers you could pick at to see more about the narrative as a whole and the message of societal corruption and how the way to overcome it is to be true to yourself rather than defined by your status: a lesson Snatcher fails at the finish line when Eggs gives him one last chance to “make you.” And ultimately, if you really and truly did like Archibald Snatcher, you’re not wrong or invalid in the least.

[writing-is-my-guilty-pleasure]

Stormy Weather || Thor x Reader

Main Masterlist

Marvel Masterlist

‘Would you want to do a Thor x Reader where the reader and Thor are spending the day together in Thor’s place and the reader has to leave to do some work for Cap or Tony but Thor causes a thunderstorm so that she doesn’t leave because he knows how much she hates getting wet (she doesn’t mind though!)’ A/N: I didn’t know whether you meant Thor’s place as in his own house or living in the Avengers tower, but I’m going to set it after Civil War, (we saw Thor looking for different roommates and lets say he managed to find a place of his own. Also mentions of siding with Steve in Civil War soz if you didn’t but I feel like Thor would have sided with Steve.) and just ignore the fact it might not totally fit into the timeline of the movies but hEy I did my best I’m still struggling to accept Infinity War even though Endgame is in like two weeks.  Also sorry if this is too short, I’m trying to overcome writer’s block!

 “You know, when you said you had your own place, I never expected it to look this good.” You said absentmindedly, leaning against Thor as you watched the TV together. Thor chuckled, and you felt it rumble through his entire being – his loud, booming voice was not restricted to speaking, it radiated from his entire being.

“I’ll take that as a compliment, considering my taste in decoration seems to have exceeded your expectations.” Thor grinned at you, moving his arm so that it rested on your shoulders, eyes not leaving the screen infront of the two of you. You smiled at him, eyes resting on the world outside one of Thor’s windows. It was a relatively normal day: the sun was shining, and there were only a few clouds in the sky, or so you could see from your limited point of view. You could hear the world moving as normal around you, the occasional car horn standing out amongst the usual bustle that was the citizens of America.  “I appreciate you taking the time out of your week to come and visit me, Y/N.” Thor’s voice broke you out of your train of thought, and you turned your head back to him.

“It wasn’t any trouble at all, Thor.” You grinned at him. “I’d much rather be here spending time with you than out fighting bad guys and putting my life on the line, which by the way,” You paused, shifting around on the sofa, sitting up straighter. “Is a lot more tiring when you aren’t a god or a super-soldier who doesn’t feel like they might collapse after a few hours of fighting.” You pouted as Thor let out a laugh at your rant.

“You make a good point Y/N, it is certainly much more enjoyable to spend time with someone as ruggedly handsome as me, who would obviously never let anything bad happen to a mortal such as yourself, and is much more experienced and trained in combat than our fellow Avengers.” Thor said, puffing out his chest physically, and also somehow expressing the same vibe when speaking. Loki’s energy has really been rubbing off on him, you thought to yourself as you shook your head, smiling. You found yourself doing that a lot more these days, especially when you were around Thor. He just seemed to have that effect on you, often reducing you to a giggling mess.

“It’s certainly nice to know that I’m appreciated for something other than my combat skills and for actually being a decent human being.” You resumed your position of resting against Thor. It was peaceful moments like this where you forgot that Thor was a god, and heir to the throne of Asgard. He felt normal to you, sure he was a little naïve when it came to realising how this world worked, but he was a genuinely kind and gentle person. You’d watched him grow as a person since you first met him when the Avengers initiative was finalised and launched, maturing over the years and realising that the Avengers never saw him as a Prince, but as one of their own and a relatively normal person. You’d also seen him grow as a so called ‘superhero’, growing used to handling his power in different ways and saving the world multiple times. When you heard about how he saved the world against the Dark Elves you couldn’t believe that it was Thor who had done it. Well, you could believe it but a few years ago, the Thor that you knew then wouldn’t have risked so much to save your world.

And hey, if in the time you’d known Thor you’d developed a slight crush on him, who was to judge you? And more importantly, who was to know? You’d never told anyone how you felt towards Thor, although the only person who you thought would know anything about your emotions and what went on inside your head was Wanda, as you’d felt the extent of her powers when you all first encountered her and her brother. The battle of Ultron really gave you some time to reflect on whether you wanted to remain a member of the Avengers, and unsurprisingly, it had been Thor who had reasoned with you and asked you to stay. But then not too soon after you’d made your decision, he’d told you all in one last meeting with some newer recruits that he had to leave to return to Asgard, and to explore parts of the universe to recover things he called ‘infinity stones’. That had almost broken you, losing one of the people you cared most about in the world – well, worlds. So while you’d stayed with the Avengers back on earth, and fought off more bad guys than you could count, there had always been a Thor-shaped hole in your heart, and for a while it had been hard not seeing him every day around the new compound, but you’d made friends with the newer members; Sam, Wanda and Vision.

Then, the Avengers split up. They straight up, boy-band, split up. Like how the Beatles split up, and how One Direction (it still hurts) split up. You’d sided with Steve and met up with Clint again and a new guy called Scott Lang. You’d never felt worse when facing your old team-mates, but you wouldn’t be free if you sided with Tony and signed that damn agreement. It might even have prevented Thor from re-joining the group when he came back. It wasn’t a proper fight – nobody wanted to seriously hurt anyone else, (except maybe T’Challa when it came to fighting Bucky) and when Steve and Bucky made it away from Tony and the reason that the fight had started, the rest of the team had to face the consequences of their actions. That had to have been one of the worst moments of your life, the time you all spent in those cells. It hadn’t helped when Tony came by to visit, and even when he tried to help, you still weren’t sure about him anymore. He’d changed.

Fast forward a few weeks, and you found yourself on the run from the government, accompanied by Steve, Sam and Natasha. You travelled from hotel to hotel, never using the same name when booking rooms, and you and Natasha had had to dye your hair to try and keep your real identities secret. Hey, it had worked so far. You’d run into Thor a couple of weeks ago in a library, and almost had a heart attack upon seeing him. He hadn’t recognised you at first, but as soon as you spoke his face had lit up, and he’d pulled you into a bone-crushing hug. You’d explained your situation to him, and while he seemed to think that the whole event was completely ridiculous and simultaneously offended that you hadn’t thought to invite him along to the fight, he appreciated that you had to lie low for a while, so the two of you couldn’t meet up in public.

So, today was the first day in a long time that you had been able to truly relax, and you immediately got in contact with Thor, because if anyone can make you feel relaxed and safe, Thor can. Bringing yourself out of your memories, you saw that the movie you two had been half-heartedly watching had ended, and the credits were rolling. Without speaking, you reached over Thor, picking up the remote and clicking through the vast selection of movies that Netflix supplied, and once finding a movie the two of you wanted, you pressed play, and set the remote on the coffee table infront of you, and resumed your position against Thor.

“Thanks for letting me stay here today.” You said quietly, only half-focusing on the movie, half-focusing on the literal god sitting next to you. Thor’s hand shifted from resting on your shoulder, and brushed a few shorter strands of hair away from your face, and gently ran his fingers through your hair in a soothing motion. He didn’t reply, simply letting out a long breath, acknowledging your thanks silently. You abandoned trying to focus on the TV, and let your eyes roam over Thor, from his long, blonde hair down to Mjolnir, which was resting on the sofa on the other side of Thor. As you gazed at him, you felt your cheeks flush, as your emotions decided that now would be a great time to express your affections towards Thor.

As if you had spoken aloud, Thor turned his head to look at you, and his gaze softened as his eyes roamed over your face. “You know, my father used to tell me that humans were ugly beings, and were never worth our time.” Thor rumbled, and you sat up abruptly, eyebrows raised, feeling rather offended. I mean sure, you weren’t the prettiest and most good-looking person in the world but now that’s just plain rude. Realising what he said might have come off a bit too harsh and not at all like it had sounded in his head, Thor hurried to correct himself. “And while I did believe him when I was younger, my personal opinions have changed quite drastically.” He shifted, pulling you closer. “You changed my mind, Y/N.” His usual smile graced his features, and for you, it lit up the whole room. “I’ve never met anyone so beautiful, and if I could, I would give you all of my free time, because you are worth all the time in the world.” During his speech, the distance between the two of you had lessened.

“Thor,” You breathed, face even redder than before. “I-I don’t…” You couldn’t find the words to express your reaction to his words, but he seemed to understand what you meant. He rested one of his large hands on your cheek, tilting your head up and simultaneously leaning down towards you. You were so close that if you leant forwards the slightest bit, the two of you would be kissing, and lord knows when you’d stop.

Just as you were about to close the gap between the both of you, your phone decided to say a big ‘fuck you’ and let out the harsh sound of your ringtone. You stayed where you were for a few seconds, and when your phone didn’t stop ringing, you let out a loud groan of annoyance, and heaved yourself off the sofa, grabbing your phone.

“Hello?” You answered, a bit more rudely than you probably should have, considering you didn’t check who had called you.

“Y/N? Is this a bad time?” Steve’s voice rang through the phone and you mentally hit yourself multiple times. “Only something’s come up, and if you aren’t busy we could really use your help.”

“Oh…no, its not a bad time at all,” You answered sheepishly, on full alert now. “I’m…” You looked around at Thor, who was watching you with an affectionate expression plastered across his face. “Hanging out with a friend, what’s up? Let me know where you are and I can probably come and find you guys.” You mouthed ‘It’s Steve, I have to go.” at Thor, hopping around ungracefully on one foot as you struggled to pull your shoe on. Thor frowned slightly, and turned to look outside. You followed his gaze, and no sooner than you did, the bright blue sky began to turn a dark grey, and the rumble of thunder echoed across the sky. You sighed as Thor turned around again, a cheeky twinkle in his eyes as you bit your lip. “Actually, Steve, it’s not looking too great out there and I don’t want to risk getting in an accident trying to get to you guys…and you know I have a thing about getting wet.” Steve sighed on the other end of the phone, but didn’t seem too bothered about you not coming, and you hung up the phone.

“Thor, that could have been an important mission…” You reprimanded half-heartedly, because who could be truly mad at Thor?

“If it was that important, you would have left anyways.” Thor said truthfully, and you knew he was right. Besides, you weren’t complaining that you got to spend an extra few hours with him. You grinned, pulling off the one shoe you’d managed to get on correctly, and resumed your position on the sofa next to him, and you felt your heart flutter as he placed one of his arms around you once more.

[sherrybaby14]

Who Am I Chapter 20

Summary:  You believe your Alphas rejected you, while they believe you no longer want them.

Warnings: Angst, smut.  This is a non-con/rape story. Please do not read if this offends you.  A/B/O Dynamics

You sat at your lab station and tried to look busy, but you kept glancing toward the door.  It had been a week since you laid eyes on another soul and were eager for Bruce’s arrival.  

Imagination and wishes were starting to blend.  It was easy to view the door opening and it not being Bruce.

“Hey Doll.” Bucky struggled to keep the smile off his face. 

“What’s wrong?” Steve stood behind him, never trying to hide the look of concern. 

“I’m sorry.” You couldn’t get the words out before you ran over to them and jumped in their arms. “I’m so sorry.” 

You blinked and the images vanished.  What would happen if you did apologize? You never really got the chance.  Maybe they would forgive you?  But that would mean risking rejection, and even though you tried to fight it, their lack of contact with you was not normal for an Alpha. It wasn’t normal for your Alphas either.  

They were staying away because they wanted to because they didn’t want you.   “Stop.” You yelled at your brain.  This was why you needed to keep busy or else this was all that filled your head. 

  Finally, the sound of keys made you rise from your workbench.  The door was locked on the outside, but you could push it open from the inside if you wanted.   You smiled as Bruce walked into the room carrying shopping bags. It was nice to see him, but the fact it wasn’t Bucky and Steve reminded you how silly your fantasies were becoming.  

“Been keeping busy?” Bruce’s voice echoed across the space. “It’s sort of creepy down here.” 

“I hadn’t noticed.” You looked around and saw most of the area was dark. “Did you bring me the chemicals?” 

“Yes, Ma’am.” Bruce dropped some bags by the fridge. “And some food too.” You frowned, carrying more about your cell splicing theory than the bland groceries.

“Your list was a little strange.  How would bromine help with your pills?” Bruce set the other bags on your work table. “I’d love to hear your theories on its impact.”

Of course, Bruce would try and interpret your list of requests. 

“Maybe someday.” You tried to shake it off. “Once I’m finished.”

  “Right.” Bruce nodded. “You probably don’t have time for scientific discussion.  I know you Y/N, eager to get back to work.” 

“Yep.” You nodded your head in agreement. At least the old you was obsessed with work.  The new one still valued science but was starting to seek more of a balanced life. 

“So any breakthroughs? Anything I can help with?” Bruce looked down at your lab space.

“I don’t think so.” You didn’t want him checking out your set up and asking questions. “What’s going on in the outside world?” 

“You haven’t searched google?” Bruce raised an eyebrow. “Are you working non-stop?  Two minds are always better than one.  Why don’t you walk me through what you’ve done so far?” 

“I meant how are Steve and James?” You blurted out the first question that popped in your head and cringed, immediately regretting it. 

Bruce’s brow smoothed and his lips parts, softening his features.  At least his eyes were on you and not the table.

“I haven’t seen them.” He tilted his head. “Do you want to see them? Send a message? Anything?”  

“No.” You dropped your gaze. “Just making conversation.” 

“Y/N. I guess we’ve never really talked personal before.” Bruce scratched his head. “I know I’m a little awkward with this stuff, but I’m here if you need to talk.” Bruce tried to sound sweet, but you knew he would rather discuss particles than romance.  Your relationship had always been professional.  When he came to see you after your heat he couldn’t even say the word.

You shook your head.

“When you broke up with them they were pretty devastated.” Bruce pulled out a chair and sat down. “I brought you back here because you needed an Alpha, I didn’t know any others and I figured with your past they were the best bet.”

“And I thanked you.” You put on a fake smile, wanting this conversation to end. “But I should get back to work.” 

“Look, I don’t know much about this Alpha-Omega stuff.” Bruce held his hands up. “But based on what I know, I would say the ball is in your court.”

“Excuse me?” You knew that Bruce was missing a lot of details about how things went down with Bucky and Steve, but in what world could he think that?

“You broke up with them.  Being with an Avenger was too dangerous, right? I realize that it never occurred to me, do you want to go back to them? Because I can ask.” 

“Don’t.” You squinted your eyes shut and put your hands on the counter. 

  The last thing you wanted was to explain to Bruce about your detoxing situation with your Alphas, or how you told Loki and Tony. Plus there was no way he could comprehend their absence after your heat.  It was too much. 

“You’ve done enough, really.” You put on the fake smile again.  “But, I am eager to get back to it.” 

“Alright.” Bruce stood up. “And you’re sure you don’t want any help?”

“I’ve got this.” You went to the bags and started unpacking. “I’m fine.  Really.” “Not to add pressure, but how much longer are you thinking?” He glanced at your workspace.

“No clue.” You shook your head. “I’m trying my best, but nowhere near figuring out the compound.” 

“Well, keep e-mailing me. Call if you need anything.  I’ll check on you next week?” Bruce gave a half smile. 

“Uh-huh.” You tried to keep moving your hands to stop any sort of shake from showing.

“Okay then.” Bruce let out a loud breath and stuck his hands in his pockets. “Good thing you’re not scared of the dark.”

He walked away, his footsteps echoing.  You glanced up at him as he left, then looked around the giant empty floor.  It was pretty dark, but you’d never noticed.

  You shut your eyes and threw your head back, feeling guilty for lying and endangering him and Tony about the pills and some relief that you’d bought yourself another week. 

~~~ “Ugh.” There was a poke in Steve’s shoulder. 

“See. He’s alive.” Tony sounded far away.

Steve blinked a few times and was met with a splitting headache. He groaned and sat up, pulling his head into his arms.

“What the hell did you two do?” Tony’s voice cleared. 

Steve dropped his hands and glanced at the mess.  The brand new table was splintered, there were pieces of drywall on the floor along with human-sized dents in the wall.  

Bucky let out a groan and rolled to his side.  

A light flashed in Steve’s eye and he brought up his arms, shielding the flash and seeing Bruce with a doctor’s pen aimed at him. 

“I don’t need a check-up.” Steve started to stand. “Enhanced remember? I’ll be fine in a few hours.”

“Oh, I walked in and saw this mess, ran and got Bruce.” Tony took Steve’s arm and helped him up. “But not because you needed a doctor, because I wanted someone else to witness this scene to prove I wasn’t dreaming.” 

Steve steadied himself as Bruce helped Bucky to his feet.

“Just so we’re on the same page, you two did this to each other right?” Tony pointed back and forth. “There’s not another villain on the loose in my tower?” 

“It’s nothing.” Bucky walked towards the kitchen. “We needed to let off some steam.” 

Steve heard the water going and walked over to the sink.  Bucky placed a glass out for him and he took it, slamming the entire thing. 

“Is this about Y/N?” Bruce looked shocked. 

“It’s private,” Bucky answered. 

Steve leaned against the counter. 

“I’m guessing ten thousand in damages?” Tony held his arms up. “You do realize a large chunk of the building is currently under construction?  You two are paying for this.”

“A bunch of stubborn morons.” Bruce shook his head. “Do you guys want to see her? I’m sure she wouldn’t mind.  Maybe communicating with words is better than kicking the crap out of each other?”

Steve looked to Bucky.  He’d taken the lead on things and they ended up here.  His best friend locked eyes with him and Steve dipped his chin.

“Like I said.” Bucky took another drink of water. “It’s private.”

Bruce’s mouth hung open and he slapped Tony’s arm.  Steve knew Bruce didn’t have the entire story and was certain if he heard it they would be dealing with the Hulk in a manner of seconds.  

“Well like I said.” Tony pointed at them. “You two are paying for this. Hire your own contractors.”

Tony turned and Bruce followed him.  The two of them started whispering and Steve knew it was about him, Bucky, and Y/N.  Betas could never understand.   Bucky came up and leaned on the other side of the counter. 

“You said no?” Steve knew Buck was the more sensitive one, for those few seconds he held out hope his friend would follow his heart and they would be reunited with their girl.

“You were right. I don’t want to force anything on her again.” Bucky sighed. “She had a choice, and she didn’t pick us.”

Steve stared at the ground. The feeling of dread worked its way into his bones.  If Bucky felt that way too he knew what was coming soon: acceptance.  It terrified him to let her go. ~~~     This time you were prepared.  Your chemicals were set out exactly on the counter and you had a story for Bruce regarding your lack of progress. 

Unfortunately this week you had a bit of a breakthrough on your side experiments and wished you could run your theories by him, but there was no way you could explain why you were working on that and not rediscovering your pills.  

“Hey.”  Bruce didn’t have any bags with him. 

“Hi.” You stood up straight, trying not to look nervous. 

“Make any progress?” Bruce came to your table.

“Yeah, actually.” You looked down. “I think I have it narrowed down to twelve isolated variables.”

“Good.” Bruce nodded and leaned against the table. 

“Do you want me to walk you through them?” You had spent yesterday practicing. 

In reality, you spent your week YouTubing hobbies some more. Meditation was never something you could master, but you were getting braiding your hair down.  Your favorite had been the scientific stuff, but again you needed more supplies.  

“I can’t stay long.” He stuck his hands in his pockets. “Y/N, are you sure this is what you want?”

“Yes.” You gave a nervous laugh. “Why?”

“You seem…happy? Not being on the pills I mean.  Are you sure you don’t want to head to an Omega home?” Bruce was trying so hard to seem relaxed you saw right through it. “No offense, but you’re living alone in a dank dark basement without going crazy.  You used to be a little more uptight?” 

“No. Not an option.  I’m sorry it’s taking so long.  I’ll try to hurry it up.” Adrenaline flared.

Creepy basement or not, this was the first time you’d ever gotten to know yourself without any outside influence.  Besides that, if they forced you out of here before your heat hit you would never get a chance to see Steve and James again.

“Did you bring what I asked for? I think the acidic base could create an entirely new component.”  You needed to change the subject.

“Right.” Bruce nodded. “Actually I had another idea. It’s Tony’s birthday this weekend.  We’re all going to celebrate in Napa.”

“You’re joking right?” This was a trick. “I can’t leave the tower.”

Were they going to drag you away?  Your heart raced so hard it felt like it was going to beat out of your chest.

“Oh no.” Bruce held a hand up and waved it. “I meant, his penthouse will be empty. I thought you could use a few days of sunlight, even if its through windows. Take the weekend off.  Refresh.”  

“Are you sure?  I thought isolation was best?  What if someone sees me?” This still felt like a setup.  

You glanced towards the door and wondered if authorities were on the other side.

“It’s the weekend, most employees are gone.  All of the Avengers and close SHIELD agents are leaving for the party. I think you’ll be safe. You can trust me Y/N.” Bruce stood up straight. “A lot of them left already. My flight is in thirty minutes so I can take you up now or you can stay down here and I’ll bring your stuff on Sunday.” 

“Should I change?” You had on a pair of yoga pants and a white tank.  It was your uniform since that was all that was in the bag of clothing provided to you. Twenty pieces of the same clothing and undergarments.  “Or bring anything?”

“No. Tony knows you’re coming. It was his idea.” Bruce waved his hand over his shoulder. “Sort of a mea culpa.” 

Bruce started walking and you followed.  This was happening too fast.  You stopped.  

“Y/N, you have nothing to worry about.” Bruce kept moving when he got to the door. “But remember Tony has a pool. Live a little, take a few days off.”

You were too familiar with Tony’s pool.  After spending time with Bucky in there you assumed you were on the banned list for not following his rules.  

Analyzing every situation was how you’d always operated. Bruce was operating too fast. 

“Or stay down here, alone.  It’s up to you.” Bruce held open the door. 

Your heart lurched and stomach knotted.  Bruce dipped his chin. 

“Come on Y/N.  Let’s go.”  

Even though it didn’t compel you it was easier to listen to him and leave the basement than let your mind run over every option known to man.  

You walked down the long hallway to the elevator.  The box was waiting and both of you headed inside.  

“I wasn’t expecting this.” You didn’t want a silent elevator ride to fall back into your thoughts. “Why didn’t you mention it over e-mail?” 

“Spur of the moment.” Bruce shrugged. 

“So I’ll be all alone?” You weren’t sure if you were making small talk or trying to find out if two other people were going to be in the building.

“Steve and Bucky are coming to Tony’s party.” Bruce glanced at you. “Sure you don’t want to talk to them?”

You hated it that he went there.  This small talk needed to drop.  You looked forward and nodded.  

“I know I said you looked happy down in that basement, but there was one other time I saw you happier.” Bruce kept his eyes straight ahead. 

The memory made you cringe.  You were wearing Bucky’s clothes and probably looked freshly fucked in front of a colleague.  

Your reaction reminded you of what you had come to know though.  You weren’t you on the pills and you weren’t you after being intimate with your Alphas.  

There was more you cared about than pleasing them or focusing on your job.  Omega or not, you were a person. You’d learned more about yourself in two weeks than you had in your entire life.

The elevator came to a stop and you braced yourself, still scared this was a trick.  Instead, it opened up to Tony’s plush apartment.  

“Loki.” You said the name as you walked out, remembering the last time you were here.

God of mischief was an appropriate title for him since he started this whole thing.   “You don’t have to worry about him.” Bruce was a few feet in front of you and pointed up to the balcony. “Upstairs on the left is Tony’s room.  Stay out of there.  The right has two guest rooms.  Pick whichever you like.  Otherwise, you’re on your own.” 

“Just like that?”  The ceiling was at least sixty feet high. The huge windows showed the dark blue skyline, skyscrapers starting to light up. “You’re leaving?”

“I’ve got a flight to catch.” Bruce put his hands on your shoulders and leaned in, placing a kiss on your cheek. “Enjoy yourself.”

The gesture was uncharacteristic of your fellow scientist.  But the touch almost made you cry.  You were enjoying getting to know yourself, but that didn’t make you any less lonely.  

Lonely.  Even thinking the word made you gasp.  You could lie to a lot of people, but when the truth slipped out in your mind it was hard to deny.

Bruce walked back to the elevator. You were still processing your thoughts. 

 Maybe you should call out, stop him, have him take you to Bucky and Steve.  Maybe they would forgive you, maybe the three of you could find a way to work.  Maybe it was worth a shot.  

Before you could raise your concerns the ding sounded and Bruce disappeared, leaving you alone in the giant apartment.  

You deserved solitude, but at least your Alphas had each other and we're going to have their friends this weekend.  You could take some solace in that fact.   The window called to you and you walked over to it, pressing your hand against the pane.  You were about to lose yourself in your min when another ding sounded.  

Bruce came back.  You looked over your shoulder, unsure if you should tell him to get your Alphas or keep with the plan.  

When you opened your mouth to speak you froze. It wasn’t Bruce.

  Steve stepped out first. He had on dress pants and a blue button down. Bucky was right behind him dressed all in black. 

“Are we the first ones?” Steve glanced around the apartment, his eyes stopped moving as soon as they landed on you. 

You looked to Bucky who had also spotted you and was now staring. The dark-haired Alpha’s lips parted in shock.  Steve’s eyebrows were raised too.  Neither of them expected to see you.  

They were about twenty feet away from you, but it felt like there was a thick ocean separating them.  A small gasp escaped your throat and you shut your mouth, not realizing it had been hanging open.  

“Y/N.” The sound of Steve’s voice was stronger than you remembered and it made your knees start to buckle. 

This was too hard, you missed them and seeing them without being in their arms, without knowing everything was alright was too much. Even though you didn’t want to look away you had no chance of keeping it together if you kept looking at them. 

It was too late though.  Your legs gave out and you crumbled to the floor as a sob escaped your lips.  

“Y/N, you have to calm down,” Steve spoke through gritted teeth.

  The harshness of his voice made you look up.  Twilight was setting in, but you saw it clear as day, his pupils starting to turn black.  

Would that be so bad? Triggering their Alpha to take care of you?  Like the first time.  If that was going to happen you wanted to get a chance to apologize before they vanished again. 

“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.” You blurted out between sobs. “Forgive me. I’m so sorry for what I did to you two.” 

“What?” Bucky stepped forward. 

“I should never have left. I should never have involved Tony. I understand why you hate me, but you’re still so good you helped me and I didn’t deserve it.” You were still on your feet but needed to put your hands on the floor before you fell. “I’m so sorry. I’d give anything to take it back.” 

“Hey.” There were hands on your back and under your knees, scooping you in the air.  

Immediately you hands went behind Bucky’s neck as he carried you over to the couch. Feeling his body next to yours was making you melt even more.  When he left this time it was going to be harder.

  He walked you over to Steve, who also had his arms out. When you reached him you stretched and pulled him close and his hands went to carry you as well.  Both of them leaned their heads towards you as the held you in the middle of the apartment.  

“I’m so sorry.” You sniffled.  

“It’s alright Doll.” Steve kissed the top of your head. “We’re sorry too.” 

“Why?  You didn’t do anything wrong.” You lifted your chin and glanced between the two of them.  “All you did was try to help me.” 

“I think we should all sit down.” Bucky kept you close as he pulled you away from Steve. 

The two of them walked over to a couch and set you so you were half on each of their laps, both of them twisted slightly toward you.  Steve took one of your hands in his and brought it to his lips, giving your knuckles a light kiss.  

“We thought you didn’t want us.” Bucky’s metal arm snaked around your waist pulling you further onto his lap, but twisting you so you both faced Steve. “Especially after you didn’t ask for us.”

“What do you mean?” You looked over your shoulder at him. “You mean when you helped me through my heat? I thought since you weren’t there when I woke up, you were just doing your duty to help an Omega.”

“Never Doll.” Steve kissed your hand again, making you look towards him. “We gave you a choice. We wanted you to make it without any influences.  I told you before we left, all you had to do was ask and we would come running.”

“I don’t remember.” You glanced between the two of them. “I didn’t remember anything from my heat. Only flashes, and feelings. I knew you were there, I knew it was you, but I was like an animal. I don’t remember any conversations at all.” 

Bucky let out a small grunt and Steve went from looking shocked to sheepish.  You couldn’t help but giggle. 

“What?” Steve tilted his head. “How is this funny?”

“We’ve all spent the last two weeks without each other for no reason.”  You shut your eyes and felt like the weight of the world was lifting off your shoulders. “So you want me?” 

“More than anything.” Bucky kissed your head. 

“Always.” Steve’s other hand squeezed your knee. “And you?  You want us?” The warm tears formed as you tried to think of what to say, but there weren’t words so instead, you nodded furiously.  

“Yes.”  You kept nodding and took a breath. “I love both of you. I love you so much it hurts.” 

Steve broke out in a smile and Bucky pulled you even tighter.  

“Can we go home now?” You looked over your shoulder. 

Bucky was smiling and he stood up, pivoting you so he was cradling you once again.  

“Let’s get out of here before the rest of Tony’s guests show up.” Steve held your hand as he rose from the couch. “I want it just us for the next few days.” 

“You mean the people going to Napa?” You asked. “Bruce was leaving for the plane. He told me I would be alone here all weekend.”

“Clever Betas.” Bucky laughed.  

You smirked. A few minutes ago you were certain this was a setup, and it was.  You rested your head on Bucky’s shoulder as you walked into the elevator.   Steve hit the down button and the doors shut.  

“Good evening Mr. Rogers, Mr. Barnes, Dr. Y/L/N.  I have a message from Mr. Stark and Dr. Banner.  They say: ‘all three of you are stubborn idiots and you’re welcome.’” The AI’s voice filled the elevator.  

You pinched your eyes shut with embarrassment as Steve and Bucky laughed.   “I hate it that I’m putting them in danger by being here.  Unmated Omega.” You wished they had claimed you during your heat. 

“We’ll take care of it during your next cycle.” Steve rubbed your back. “We promise.”

“Who knows when that will be.” You wanted it now. 

It was worth the wait though, trying when you weren’t in your heat would make it next to impossible for them both to claim you. 

“We have plenty of time to practice.” Bucky’s eyes danced down your face.  

He steadied his gaze on your lips and licked his own. Your body flashed with lust at the simple gesture.  A purr came from Steve, who continued to rub your back.   There was no way it was going to be anyone but the three of you for the next several days.   ~~~ You were carried up the stairs, still cradled to Bucky’s chest with Steve walking in front of you. You had never felt safer in your entire life.  A warmth was spreading through your body. You were home.  Not because you were back in the apartment, but because you were with the two of them.  

Steve opened the door to his room and all three of you went inside.  The anticipation of what was to come made wetness pool at your core.  You pressed your legs together, aware that the scent was making its way to your Alphas. 

Even though you knew you were protected there was a slight shake to your body when Bucky set you down on the edge of the bed.  

“Are you scared?” Steve knelt in front of you placing his hand on your knee, while Bucky took a seat, putting his arm around your shoulder.   

“No.” You lied and shut your eyes. 

Both Alphas let out low growls and you popped your lids open. They knew you were lying. 

“Yes.” You let out a whimper.  

“Why?” Steve leaned down and kissed your knee at the same time Bucky kissed your shoulder. “We’d never hurt you.”

“We can tell you're getting excited.” Bucky kissed down your arm, lifting it in the air to meet his lips. 

“In a way, this feels like the first time.” Your legs parted as Steve kissed down your thigh. 

“Relax Doll,” Steve spoke between light kisses. “Let us take care of you.”  

“There’s nothing we want more in the world.”  Bucky reached your wrist at the same moment Steve came to your apex. 

You gasped as Bucky lifted your arm in the air and Steve rose your behind from the bed.  Both of them worked quick. Bucky pulled your tank top over your head at the same time Steve pulled off your pants and panties. Bucky’s hands went to your back and unclasped your bra right when Steve tugged off the bottoms, making you fall back into the bed, completely nude. 

Both of your Alpha’s rose and looked down at your naked form.  Instinct made you move to cover yourself but again they each growled. 

“So beautiful Doll.” Bucky started unbuttoning his shirt. 

“Our perfect Omega.”  Steve untucked his and ripped it over his head. 

The sight of his body rippling with the motion made you moan and even more slick gather between your legs. 

Steve leaned down and grabbed one of your ankles.  You pointed your toes as he lifted your leg to his mouth and started kissing.  His lips felt like they were burning your skin and comforting it at the same time. The position made you fall back on your elbows, with your other knee bent on the bed and legs slightly parted. 

“I bet you taste better than you smell.” Bucky’s voice made you look towards him. 

You got a glimpse of his equally perfect bare torso before he fell forward, his head landing right between your legs. 

“Ah!” You let out a small noise when his tongue ran up your slit.  

Steve kissed down your calf, before dipping your leg and wrapping it around Bucky’s shoulder. His tongue flickered against your clit making you moan.  He kept the light pressure, and you found yourself trying to use your heel to pull him closer.

“Patience Doll.” Bucky chuckled. 

The bed dipped and your eyes snapped back to Steve.  He came down over you and pressed his mouth to yours.  You did not hesitate to open your lips and take his tongue against yours.  At the same time, Bucky pressed himself harder against your pearl and you moaned even louder into Steve’s mouth.  

It was like the two of them were aware of exactly what the other was doing.  Steve’s tongue rolled against yours in a deep wave while Bucky used his to bring your body to life.  

Steve’s hand went to your stomach while Bucky repositioned himself so that each of his arms wrapped around your thighs.  You brought your other leg around his shoulder and put your arms around Steve’s neck as you fell completely back into the bed.  

Fingertips ran up your stomach and the same time as another set loosened its grip on your thigh.  Steve’s traced upward until they reached the bottom of your breast while Bucky’s swooped down until they lightly glazed your entrance. “Mmmm.” You whimpered into Steve’s mouth.  

You found yourself trying to arch your back into Steve’s touch and flex your pelvis into Bucky’s finger at the same time. The movement was impossible and resulted in receiving either touch further while lessening the other. “Mmmmppph!” You cried out again, but Steve only deepened the kiss.  

Both of them touching you, but neither giving you exactly what you wanted was driving your crazy, making you wiggle underneath them in a constant, erratic movement.  Finally, you couldn’t take it anymore and flipped your head to the side, ending the kiss.

Before you could speak you started to pant. 

“Please.” You panted again. “Please. I need more.” 

A hand was on your chin, whipping your head back towards Steve.  You gasped and another wave of excitement shook your body when black eyes looked down at you.

“That’s what you want.” His fingertips applied more pressure and started to work up your breast.

“We know what you need.” Bucky looked up from between your legs.  

His eyes were just as black as Steve’s.  Seeing them like this made you moan and drop your head back.  It was you causing this.  The first time you were so scared, but now you understood the control you had over them, your body forcing each of them into the Alpha state.  It sent a surge of power through you.   Right when Steve’s fingertips reached your nipple Bucky’s finger slid into your canal.  Steve pinched while Bucky filled and you squealed, arching your back.   Steve leaned over you and started to kiss your neck while Bucky’s wet tongue pressed against your clit again.  You dropped one hand and ran it through his hair while you brought the other to Steve and did the same.  

Bucky’s tongue pulsed, while Steve rolled your bud into a hard pebble.  Then Bucky started to curl his finger and your legs shook.  Steve used the opportunity to kiss down your clavicle until his mouth replaced his fingers.  

He sucked your nipple into his mouth and began teasing it with his teeth, alternating between biting and lightly grinding the nerve center.  His other hand went to your neglected tit and began giving it the same amount of attention with his fingertips.  

Bucky clicked his fingers inside of you, bringing your fleshy patch to life while his mouth sucked your bundle on nerves to the point it was almost too much.   The attention began to gather at your core.  Everything they were doing to you traveled to the single place and piled up.  Each of their motions made you climb higher and higher.  It was tightening, to the point, you were a moaning mess on the bed, incapable of focusing on anything but the release that loomed over you. Steve sucked harder and Bucky clicked faster. The buildup scattered as you through your head back, the orgasm sending the pile of pleasure through your entire body. 

“MmmmmMmMM!” You tossed your head to the side, certain that you were going to lose consciousness.  

All the nights you missed this, missed them only intensified the orgasm.  Your body craved your Alphas and you had been denying yourself far too much.   Bucky’s finger slid out and Steve’s head disappeared.  You curled on your side, unsure if you wanted to ecstasy to carry you into sleep or try to fight it down for more.  

“We’re just getting started Doll.”  The mattress dipped and hands were on your hips. “I missed you.”  

You forced your eyes open as you were lifted in the air.  Bucky position you so you were straddling him.  He bent his knees and set your back against them, giving you the support you needed since you were still reeling from the orgasm.   His hand went between the two of you, while the metal one stayed on your hip and lifted you.  His cock was at your pussy, pressing against your hole.  You closed your eyes as his head pushed inside of you.  

“AH!” You almost fell forward, forgetting how large he was.  

“So beautiful Doll.”  His metal hand pushed you down. 

You were soaked from the previous attention, but still felt every bit of him as your pussy stretched down.  He was thick and your walls started to convulse.  You whined, unsure if him filling you was causing a residual orgasm or you were struggling to accommodate him.

“Eeeee!” Either way, you let out a screech.  

Your thighs slid apart as you were impaled. All of your nerves were scrambled, but there was no doubt the sensation was amazing.  

His other hand returned to your opposite hip and held you upright while you settled.  

Even though he was holding you up, your shoulders started to slouch.  You expected to keel over, but a hand touched your chin.  

You opened your eyes and looked to see Steve kneeling next to Bucky.  His cock was rock hard, and right in front of your mouth.

   You barely had a chance to lick your lips before he pulled your head forward.  You opened your mouth and tried to relax your jaw while he pressed against your tongue. 

“Good Omega.” Steve purred.  

Bucky’s fingers dug into your hips and he flexed up, making you pop and take Steve further into your mouth.  When the dark hair soldier lowered you back down he didn’t give you a second to recover before he lifted you up again.   This time Steve’s cock went even deeper, you had to press your tongue down or risk gagging.  You brought your hands to Steve’s thighs to brace yourself and moaned.  

Bucky slid you up and down his pole, and every inch that left your pussy an inch of Steve entered your mouth.  The taste of Steve’s precum was more delicious than you remembered and you found yourself hungry for more. 

It was enough motivation to start flicking your tongue.  Bucky must have sensed the eagerness return and began bouncing you faster.  The stuffed feeling was sending you into overdrive and you started to rock your hips, making his cock bump into your G-spot with each thrust.  

You continued working your tongue against Steve, wanting to taste all of him.  The thought of his cum hitting the back of your throat, floating down into your belly made you whimper.  You needed that.  

So you began bobbing your head faster, desperate for all of him.  Saliva started to pool at the corners of your mouth.  You were desperate to taste him. “Ahhh.” Steve let out a groan.  

Then you felt it.  Your eyes popped open and you almost fell over, taking Steve down your throat in the process, as Bucky’s metal finger pressed against your clit.  

You had been so focused on getting Steve off you forgot about the giant cock spearing you.  Bucky’s finger brought you back to your own pleasure as he began rubbing circles.  

The attention was too much and you cried out, trying to jerk your hips backward.  You were met with Bucky’s knees, keeping you from getting away from his touch.  

You jerked your head back to drop Steve from your mouth and tell Bucky you were too sensitive, but Steve’s hand grabbed your skull before his tip fell.  You looked up at him with pleading eyes but were meant with the black ones staring back at you.  

“Remember.  We know what you need.” Steve’s voice carried a warning.  

They were the Alphas.  They would never hurt you.  You gave your head a nod and Steve lessened his grip.  

“Good Omega.” Bucky purred this time. 

Your body shook in response to the praise. Bucky flexed his hips up again as his finger pushed even harder and your eyes rolled into the back of your head. 

“That’s it Doll.  Give yourself to us.”  Steve rubbed your head, his cock still in your mouth. 

  Bucky was working your body too much and you could no longer concentrate on blowing Steve, instead, the only movement from your mouth was the result of Bucky lifting and dropping you

   The coil of pleasure began to form again.  This time you didn’t try to meet it.  You let Bucky remain in control, guiding your body to its release. 

  Whines and moans left your lips, but they were all stifled by Steve’s cock pressing against your tongue.  

“That’s feels so good baby girl.” Steve ran his hands over your hair.  

“Mmmmph.” You didn’t even know what you were trying to say.  

“So good Omega.” Bucky chimed in and pressed down hard.

His finger was torturing your clit at the same time he was sliding you up and down his shaft.  When their praise mixed in you couldn’t take it any longer.  The coil burst free and euphoria spread over your entire body.  

It felt like you were falling and gasping for breath at the same time as you were flying and exploding.  You had no control over your body whatsoever. And you were grateful if it meant feeling this way.  

Suddenly your lungs burned and the passion continued to works its way through your veins, but it brought on the blackness as you gave over completely to the orgasm.  

A hand was rubbing your back.  Your breathing was heavy. You struggled to open your eyes, but the chest underneath your started to vibrate.  You were cocooned by two arms, pressed tight against your Alpha. 

“Such a perfect Omega.”  Bucky’s voice calmed you.  

Your senses started to return and you lifted your head.  His hands left your back and went to your cheeks and he pulled you down for a kiss. 

His tongue slid into your mouth and you barely had control of your jaw as he started to kiss you.  You sighed, but he kept at it, coaxing you into action.   The rest of the world started to settle in and you realized he was still buried deep inside of you, his cock slowly pulsing while his tongue moved.  Your body was still tingling with pleasure.  

Hands were on your hips, urging you to start to rock yourself.  They must have been Steves. You whined in protest.

“You can handle more Baby Doll.” Steve encouraged you. “Trust me.” 

His encouragement made you lift your hips slightly and then slide back down. You’d already cum twice and neither of them had.  Even if you couldn’t take anymore you were not going to leave them wanting.  

“That’s it.” Steve’s hands vanished. “Doing so well. Our good girl.”

You moaned and started moving faster. You wanted that: to be their good girl.  You slid up Bucky further before impaling yourself again.  Every nerve in your pussy was fried and you felt every inch of him.  It was almost Utopia.  

Bucky continued to kiss you, holding your face to his as your body was bent over him.  There was a movement behind you and Steve’s hands slid up your thighs to your ass.  He caressed your cheeks before spreading them apart. 

Panic filled you as you sucked in a breath and tried to pull away from Bucky.  He responded with a low growl. 

“Do you trust us Y/N?” Steve situated himself behind him and you felt a coolness at your rear.  “You need to relax.  We only want to give you what you need.”  

The adrenaline had brought you back to life, but the panic was starting to fade.  You responded by returning Bucky’s kiss.  

“What a good girl.” Steve’s voice was so commanding it made you relax even more. “That’s it Doll.” 

You didn’t tense when you felt his head press into your passage.  He pressed forward and you groaned into Bucky’s mouth.  It wasn’t the first time you’d taken both of them, but it was the first time you were this aware.  

Every push of Steve’s cock into your ass only made your body more aware of Bucky in your pussy.  Your groan turned into a moan.  It felt like your entire body was alive, even places you never knew existed anymore. 

Steve kept his descent slow. You knew it was for your benefit, but it made a slow pleasure pop through you. Igniting something you weren’t sure you could handle.  You tried to sit back, wanting him to enter faster.  

“Grr.” Bucky pulled his tongue out and brought a hand to your side as he sat up, pushing you down with him. 

“AHHHH!” You didn’t hide the scream as your through your head back. 

Bucky’s movement had set Steve’s entire cock in your ass.  The blond Alpha adjusted himself so his arm was on your other hip. 

All three of you sat upright, with you sandwiched between them.  You’d never felt this full in your life, literally or figuratively.  

You reached behind you and pulled Steve’s head forward. His mouth went to your neck, just like you wanted.  You moaned when Bucky dipped his head to your chest and started kissing and licking at your breasts.  

Both of them were moving their cocks too slowly. You lifted yourself and them dropped back down, getting moans out of both of them.  You repeated the action still feeling completely stuffed, but it didn’t stop the ache from forming.

“Ohhhh!” Your head dropped to Steve’s shoulder as you got into a rhythm. You were the one guiding it, but your Alphas worked together. Diving at the same rate. Your bodies were being guided by instinct and all they needed was each other.  

“Eeeeeemmmm!” You weren’t even making coherent noises.  

It was pure passion driving your beings. You were going to cum. They were going to cum.  Bucky lifted his head at the same time as Steve and you lowered yourself one final time, exploding. 

Before any of the sensations could be comprehended both of their mouths hit your neck again and teeth sunk in. 

“AHHHHH!” You let out a blood-curdling scream. 

They both hit your bonding marks at the exact time your body shook from the orgasm.  Their cocks pulsed inside of you filling both of your wholes as their claim spread through your body.  It was indescribable, but you tumbled over and over again into pleasure.  

At that moment you sunk down and rocketed away.  Pure love was filling every atom in your body, heart, and soul.  

You weren’t capable of forming a coherent thought and didn’t care if you were ever able to have one again.  

Pressure fell on your back and you collapsed, welcoming the free fall. ~~~ When you woke up your head was heavy.  Your neck ached and your hands pulled in and touched both sides.  Your fingertips ran over teeth marks.  Claimed. Bonded. Mated.  

Your eyes popped open.  You were being cuddled by two Alphas.  No, by YOUR two Alphas.  It worked.  You weren’t in your heat and it worked.  

They said it was a one in a million chance, but you were a one in a million couple.  Both of them were fast asleep as their arms draped over you, chests moving with deep sleep.  You wouldn’t wake them.  

All this time you were so concerned with who you were, trying to define yourself in any way possible.  But now that you accepted your make up you realized that was never a question.  

Every mistake you had ever made, every choice had led you to this point. And it was all worth it.  You were an Omega, you were a scientist, you were smart, you were emotional, you were loved, you were in love, you were safe, you were protected, you were cherished, and you had a long, happy life ahead of you with two truly beautiful Alphas.  

You were you. And that was all you hoped to ever be. 

WHO AM I?

A/N: Thank you so much for reading! This was my first Marvel story so it really brought me into the fandom.  I am so grateful to have people reading my stories, it means the world to me.  Thank you again! Xoxo