#this feels very ed coded too
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cha-lii · 5 months ago
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take a shot every time a shounen protagonist apologises for their trauma
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laniidae-passerine · 1 year ago
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sorry for loving Ed and Izzy more than Stede but maybe they shouldn’t have made Ed like that (a fellow mixed race babygirl suffering under her mental illnesses with a sadistic streak that is both informed by and independent of her childhood traumas) and Izzy like that (absurdly pathetic but in need of help and trying to get better)
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lovebugism · 1 year ago
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istg that “just because you’re beautiful and a good kisser does not mean i forgive you.” “you think i’m beautiful?” is sooooo eddie coded.
i'm picturing a sorta enemies to lovers with eddie pulling yet another prank on reader (we all know this boy has the emotional maturity of a five year old when it comes to making a move on the girl he likes) but he really does hurt her feelings this time so he tries to make it up to her and they end up kissing.
from what you've written before i think you could put a great spin on this sorta scenario, if you feel like it <3
hope you like it! :D — you're eddie munson's biggest enemy. and, yes, you're also his soulmate. (enemies to lovers, secret relationship, 0.9k)
bug's one year celebration ♡
You storm into the bustling lunch room, having traded your pretty corseted blouse for a piece of oversized Corroded Coffin merch — definitely not by choice. “Do you have a death wish?” you ask when you reach the Hellfire table at the very back of the cafeteria, zeroed in on its leader at the head of it.
Eddie turns slowly, blinking up at you with innocent button eyes. His chews through the hamburger wadded in his cheek. “Potentially,” he answers, muffled before he swallows it down.
You huff, too easily frustrated. It isn’t any wonder why he likes to mess with you so much. “Where are my clothes?” 
“The ones you left on my bedroom floor last night or…?”
“No, you idiot— The clothes you stole from the girl’s locker room. Which makes you a total perv, by the way.”
“Oh, that sexy little number?” he croons, turning in his seat to face you more. “It’s in my locker, actually.”
“Well, get it out,” you say with gritted teeth.
He thinks for a moment, pursing his lips to the side. “Hm… I don’t think I will.”
Your jaw tightens. “Why?”
“‘Cause it’s a little revealing, don’t you think?”
“Well, yeah, that’s kinda the point, Munson.”
He smacks his lips against his teeth, then scrunches the bridge of his nose. He wags a sarcastic, ringed finger at you. “See— Those aren’t the values a nice girl like you should have—”
“God, you’re infuriating,” you groan and stomp off again.
Eddie smiles to himself while he watches you go, cheek tilted lazily to his shoulder. The only thing he likes better than seeing you come (in more ways than one) is watching you leave.
He sighs a deep, contented sigh and turns back to the rest of the table. They’re all wide-eyed and silent, still musing on the sudden interaction with the disbelief that it had happened at all.
Eddie only grins, wider this time. “Ah… She’s obsessed with me.”
—————
By the end of the school day, your blouse hasn’t yet been returned to you. You’re still stuck in the stupid shirt Eddie had left for you — all black, too big, and obviously his. You know it belongs to him because you’ve worn it thousands of times while sleeping over at his place. It smells just like him, like weed and cologne and boy.
You’re heading towards the exits when a hand pulls you into an abandoned classroom around the corner — pale, ringed, and lanky. As if you needed any further confirmation it was Eddie Munson. 
You stumble in, and he locks it behind you.
“Don’t you think you’ve bothered me enough today?” you squint.
“Oh, so you don’t want your shirt back?” he teases, waving the thing in his free hand. You reach for it, and he snatches it back, smirking softly down at you. “Uh-uh. What’s the magic word, sweetheart.”
“Give me my shirt back,” you answer in a monotone.
“Not even close, but I’ll give you a kiss for it.”
You sigh like it’s a chore for you and lean in to kiss his cheek. Your lips just barely graze his stubbly jaw. Eddie shrugs. “You missed, but I’m feeling nice today, so—”
You snatch it from him when he hands it to you. “You can’t keep doing this, Eds. We’re supposed to hate each other.”
“Well, one, we do hate each other. Obviously,” he scoffs and leans back on one of the desks. It shifts under his weight, and he stumbles. He decides to sit on it completely while you laugh. “And two, this was, like, a genius prank on my end. I made my arch nemesis walk around in my shirt all day— you’re not giving me enough credit for this, sweetheart.”
“Yeah, except I got called the freak’s girlfriend all day.”
“By who?”
“Who do you think?”
He ponders for a moment. “…Jason?”
You nod, all slow because it’s obvious. The only one who hates Eddie more than you do is Jason Carver. You wonder if he’s secretly in love with the town freak, too.
“Well, it’s about time he knows who you belong to,” the boy says with a laugh. “He’s only been trying to get with you for two years.”
You cross your arms over your chest. “I don’t belong to anyone— I’m not a toy.”
“Well, yeah— only when you wanna be,” Eddie teases, reaching out for you. His ringed fingers curl around your wrist to pull you closer. You sigh in annoyance but walk between his thighs anyway.
“You’re so annoying.”
Eddie grins, pink and boyish. “But you like me anyway. So who’s the real loser?”
“I thought we hated each other,” you quip with narrowed eyes.
“I was kidding— Just kiss me.”
You giggle quietly and lean in to peck his lips. He tastes like nicotine and spearmint, mouth soft like flower petals. You get lost in him too easily. One peck becomes two — then three — then a longer, languid, and more drawn-out thing.
You feel Eddie smile against you, knowing he’s won now that you’re melting for him. You pull away with a smack when you regain your senses.
“Just because you’re pretty and a good kisser, doesn’t mean I forgive you, by the way. You know that, right?”
“Mhmm,” he hums mindlessly, already leaning forward to kiss you again.
You pull softly back. “And that I’m totally getting you back for this?”
“Yep.” He pecks your lips once, with a lot more self-restraint than you’d had. “So… When are you coming over to get the clothes you left at my place last night?”
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jazzyblusnowflake · 2 months ago
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(If this was asked before, I swear to god.) FullCompany (NUziVJ) Headcannons?
aaaaaaaaa time to write once more- i missed being able to type away like the lil shit i am-
anyhow- okay lets see- gonna add some things here- tbh my ideas was mostly for Jenvy ideas mainly- but i guess ill fit Uzi in there lol
Some JeNVUzi HCs:
[once again- Drone au only, and maybe minor suggestive content but not nsfw]
The polycule is essentially formed around Uzi pulling them back together-
J's original reason for siding with Cyn which was rooted in fear- was on the basis that she still had her team on her side so she could keep them safe and so theyd have eachother to rely on even after Cyn destroys everything. she did not however, account for Uzi coming along and messing everything up and ruining her team's alignment while she was "dead".
the entire reason J tried to kill N or V at any time was cuz she knew a clone of them would be sent back anyway- she has basically become desensitized towards death in general given she had also died around 12 times herself [canon]- V and N try to help her through this- during which they also deal with Vs behavior and Ns trauma too.
to communicate with J they often had to spar with her- seeing as she hated talking about feelings- but this became their own thing they all did afterwards to unwind and communicate- as J opened up a lot easier after feeling like she was reached out to.
Uzi and J bond over anime and gaming- the latter being somewhere J could actually use her anger on more effectively XD
they all like reading books every now and then where one would read and the others snuggle or cuddle- they take turns. [this is from their manor days]
J is... unable to emote or show emotion easily and it eats her alive. she can't show the appropriate needed emotion to the mood of the room and it makes her have breakdowns- occasionally throw up- as though you are desperately trying to cry but the tears wont come so you try heaving it out- make yourself fit in and look normal by trying to FEEL something- but she cant. J is a dated business model drone- custom made for office work- she was made to be this way- Cyn didn't change her- and she grows to hate herself for it. so when a situation happens that she doesn't know how to react, she leaves or hides- until N,V or Uzi find her- usually disassociating or somewhat catatonic.
Uzi occasionally feels out of place with the group, as though she's just being a literal 4th wheel, since they have history together. the others try to show her that she is important to them each in their own ways-
addressing the elephant in the room- yes, it took a long time for N and J to come to terms with eachother- J eventually accepting that her original reason for hating N [him being better than her or preferred over her esp by Tessa] wasn't important anymore- and tries to appreciate him and V and Uzi more in whatever is left of her life.
make no mistake V and J are still very much bitchy on a surface level- just cuz they are all growing close does not mean they are all now lovey dovey with eachother or sweet and character-redemption-ed with everyone around them. therefore: "playful catfights" >:3 !
V and Uzi tease J alot- this is one of the reasons why J found more comfort with N- not gonna tell him to his face tho lol.
J teaches N to draw better and they bond over that alot-
Uzi and J like attention alot- and they wanna get it by being as wordless as possible- very cat coded.
Uzi, V and N like to drag J into doing more normal things that have less to do with work. so far J has mostly shown some interest in writing and maybe poetry but she WILL shoot your head off if you try to read her stuff-
J's first kiss was with Uzi- N and V having kissed once back at the manor being eachothers first kiss. J thinks V kisses the best tho lol.
N and V like to cuddle a lot- J and Uzi are usually dependent on mood-
V likes to bite- J likes to be bitten, N and Uzi like both- :3
J likes playing with N and Uzi's fluffy hair. V only lets N touch her hair.
during intimate cuddles- J has passed out the most lol. Uzi following a close second lol-
Uzi and J yap alot about tech work-
hmm this is all i can think about for NOW-
:"3
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gnomewithalaptop · 6 months ago
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I'm still too distracted to write so here have a list of YJ-cast centric fics that make me froth at the mouth
Kon-centric recs:
I Want It That Way (1990s Tim/Kon) by WynterSky / @wynterstars -- A revamped, 90s-style Superboy origin story with added Lex Luthor AND a lil bit of 90s Robin for spice and flavor. Honestly, this whole series is so elite -- goes hard with the Superboy mythos + angst PLUS the third fic leans hard into the secret identity shenanigans in a way that'd make Miraculous Ladybug jealous. The first fic splits its attention between Tim and Kon, but the latter two are solidly Kon-centric
one plus one (easy math) by connerdrakewayne / @comphetkoncass -- Cassandra Cain and Kon go to a gala together. I'm always a sucker for a good Cass + Kon friendship. This one's very short and sweet, and it gets the job done -- 10/10 would read again
a timeline can be a haunted house by connerdrakewayne -- post-universal reset Kon angst + terrible coping mechanisms! This one goes so hard I read it three times. Tbh this author has an excellent handle on Kon as a character in general, so I honestly recommend just checking out their whole fic stash
Tim-centric recs:
Top 10 Secret Identity Fails by @havendance -- Tim's new English teacher is his on-again-off-again superhero teamup Helena Bertinelli (aka the Huntress). This one's just fun, okay -- the whole thing reads like it could be straight out of Tim's 1993 solo run, plus I love the dynamic between him and Helena. Overall just a very cool vibe
only the dead stay 17 forever by Sky_Dust (couldn't find their tumblr sorry) -- Listen, I've really been restraining myself here, because I realize my love for time-travel bullshit is not universal, but I genuinely couldn't not include this one. This bad boy is a Tim-centric time-loop featuring a seriously unhinged Tim -- definitely a darker tone, but I can't stop rereading it
Bart-centric recs:
reflections on respawning: a gamer's uncertainty by merils / @mamawasatesttube -- Bart has a hard conversation about his death and subsequent resurrection (feat. Kon) man, I just vibe with this one so hard. It's such a thoughtful take on Bart's more contemplative side, while still managing to keep his personality intact
the backlash to the backlash to the thing that's just begun by @kermit-coded -- trans/gnc impulse my beloved <3 also we get some funky Max & Bart bonding, made much rawer and more real by the fact that it's the 90s and nobody knows what they're doing. Again, feels like it's straight out of Bart's solo series
Cassie-centric recs:
you and I, we are more than just this armor by @suzukiblu -- KonCassie bonding + gender feels. They're both so trans in this, and the author does a great job of really digging deep into their complicated feelings (both about gender and about each other)
(also PLEASE somebody give me more Cassie-centric fic recs I'm literally begging you)
Team recs
I'm all yours but you're all mine by suzukiblu -- Poly Core 4 Soulmates AU! Essentially, everybody gets their 'soulmark'/soulmate-identifier (not really, but the best word) right when Kon wakes up in his pod, and because Superboy hasn't really made his big splash yet, they misidentify their soulmate as Superman; this is an issue mainly because 1) they're all 14-15 and Superman is roughly 30-ish, and 2) by the time this fic takes place, Superman is pretty verifiably dead. Currently in-progress, but this is such an interesting and fun take on the usual soulmates trope. I pinky promise you won't regret reading it
Love, Not Loved series by @popsunner -- hoooomygod this series makes me cry literally every time I read it, it's genuinely one of the most realistic representations of grief I've seen on AO3. Basically explores the general fucked-up-edness of pretty much the whole YJ Core 4 Squad dying one by one, with each fic focusing on a different funeral (complete with survivor's guilt, regular guilt, and just plain old complicated feelings). We get Cassie feels, we get Tim feels, we get Bart + Kon feels -- it's the whole shebang. Don't worry -- there's a happy ending eventually, but you def gotta work for it. This series beat me up and stole my lunch money and I'd happily do it all over again
Lost the Last Piece of Me by InsaneTrollLogic / @last01standing -- YJ Core 4 Animorphs AU! I'm sad to say I've never read the original Animorphs series, but every single Animorphs AU I've ever read has been such high quality. Unsurprisingly (I love this author, okay), this fic is no exception to that rule. Solid alien-invasion plot, character driven, and the world-building is explained well enough that even a newbie like me can understand (feat. some TimKon, but it's not the main focus)
Ikonoclast by anantipodean (couldn't find a tumblr) -- Tim and Kon get sent to an alternate reality that's almost (but not quite) like their own. This one's just fun for me -- I love the TimBart buildup and the worldbuilding on the other Earth is a funky time. Also, the other universe's Tim is goth and absolutely cannot stand mainstream-reality Tim, and I find that extremely funny for some reason
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wannaeatramyeon · 1 year ago
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The Crew Heads with Reader: Shopping
G/N. (Jake Kim, Eli Jang, Johan Seong, Samuel Seo).
Bro Code | Dinner | Shopping | Television | Gacha | Board Games | Suits
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The general public is split between taking a wide berth-
(Who can blame them? The four intimidating men in your company cast a menacing aura.)
-and ogling.
(Who can blame them? The four striking men in your company cut a very impressive figure.
Figures.
Tall and muscular, pretty and lean, charming and swoonworthy, sexy and brooding... There's someone for everyone.)
Samuel walks a few steps ahead, as if he's too good to be seen with the likes of you lot. He's not an equal, he's the leader.
In his head, anyway.
Yet when you catch up to talk to him, he slows, pace matching yours. Arches down ever so slightly to make it easier for you.
Jake and Eli flank you. Both smiling; one just a small, sweet quirk of the lips, the other a full toothy grin. Enjoying your company, your quips and running commentary.
Johan trails a little behind. Like a petulant teen out with his family. Still, being with you, even here, is better than not. So he follows, pouting and bored.
Yet can't stop the brightness in his eyes, when you turn around and give him a smile. A soft look to just say hi.
.
.
"No."
"It's just a t-shirt."
"I'm not paying for that."
"Workers pay that poorly?" Jake pulls a faux look of concern. Or it could be sincere. Who knows with Jake and Samuel. "You really should come back to Big Deal, we'll treat you right."
Samuel takes one deep breath before yanking the item from Jake's grip, and proceeds to the register with the rest of the clothing you have been interested in.
Some jeans you have ooh-ed over. A couple of jackets you have aah-ed from afar. And now also a stupid t-shirt.
Which is tacky and tasteless, Samuel thinks, mean and a touch childish.
"This one too?" You add a small dress atop the pile as the shop assistant rings through the purchases.
(Samuel pays for everything.
Took it as a personal offence the first time you said no, many moons ago. Now it's just a habit, almost expected. You're grateful, nevertheless.)
"Doesn't seem like your size," Samuel comments and you look up at him. Puppy eyes on full display and bottom lip jutted out.
A little, not too much. Don't want to overdo it.
Samuel sighs. "Fine."
He's not an idiot. He knows what you're doing, yet he's always powerless to resist.
You beam at him, giving his bicep a squeeze, "Thanks Sammy. Yenna will look adorable in it."
Samuel doesn't say anything. Couldn't give a flying fuck if Yenna will look adorable or hideous. Irritated that he even knows who Yenna is. Gives one quick glance over to Eli, who is still looking at the toddler's section, a pair of shoes in each hand.
"It's fine," he mutters as you lean up to kiss him on the cheek.
.
.
Johan perks up when it is time for lunch. The only time he has been anything other than sullen.
"So hangry all the time," you tease, and receive a scathing look in return.
"You've just proved me right," you snicker, reaching out to ruffle his hair as he slurps on his ramen. The glare remains, but there's no heat to it.
"You know," you give your coffee a stir, watching the crema dissipate, "You don't have to come out with me if you don't enjoy it."
Johan doesn't respond. You look back at him and he can't meet your eyes.
He swallows, feels the noodles and broth burning his throat. The tiniest, "I do," leaves his lips.
A ‘blink and you would have missed it’ admission.
.
.
"Y/N. Let's go." Eli whispers urgently into your ear, interrupting you gawking at a bag that costs three months of rent.
"What-"
"No time." Jake says, hoisting you up into a princess carry (effortlessly, you didn't fail to notice) and sprinting out the store.
"Put me down!" You squirm and wriggle to no avail.
"We'll explain later," Eli laughs, matching Jake step for step. Neither breaking into a sweat, neither even out of breath.
They round the corner, joining up with Samuel and Johan at full speed. All with matching gleeful expressions.
.
.
"We stole his clothes." Eli holds up a pair of trousers, Samuel a shirt, and Johan a jacket.
You're speechless. Almost. "How the fuck-"
"This genius," Jake nods at Eli, "saw Gun trying on a new suit. Admiring himself in the mirror. Probably seeing if the bucket of hair gel he usually uses is enough." A fake gag and roll of the eyes. "Johan and Sammy wanted to fight him."
"Samuel-" Sammy corrects, and is ignored. As per usual.
"I suggested the pacifist route," Jake grins. And you know he means he's not going to cause any trouble for you, even if you’ve noticed his eyes clouding over with anger.
It goes as quickly as it comes. He doesn't want you involved with Gun Park at all.
You snort, "Yeah but he can always just buy and walk away in a new outfit."
"Maybe," Eli shrugs, " Maybe not." And he fishes out the phone and wallet from each pocket.
Oh. Oh! 
You think of Gun Park standing bewildered in his undies. 
Left stranded. Clothes gone. Personal belongings gone. 
A victim of a crime committed by the bosses of the four crews and you laugh so hard you think you might never be the same again.
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rubycruzin4abruzin · 8 months ago
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behind the curtain
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Summary: Sequel to never been (stage) kissed. After shooting wraps, you and Ruby part ways. Eight months later, you see each other again at the premiere screening, and decide to “sneak away” during the after-party. How will you two navigate the paparazzi after they catch you in a compromising position?
Pairing: ruby cruz x actress!reader
Contains: mature language, adult humor, kissing, angst, fluff, hair playing, secret relationship trope, brief mention of an ED, publicity tweets and comments, invasive tabloids, the price of fame
Word Count: 4.2k
A/N: This is a sequel to my previous RPF, so the RPF Guidelines still stand. This fic contains a very brief mentioning towards an ED, and should not be triggering (at least I don’t think so). I am not insinuating anything by this mention, it is simply meant to shed light on how invasive and presumptuous Hollywood can be. That being said, I had the most fun EVER writing this! Enjoy! :)
———
Ever since the first “kissing lesson,” you and Ruby had spent every on-set lunch break in her trailer. Nothing ever progressed beyond kissing, but with the way Ruby’s hands entangled themselves in your hair, and how she shivered every time your hand grazed her thigh, kissing was really all you needed.
Your mid-day rendezvous were kept a secret from the rest of the world. None of the cast or crew knew exactly what was happening when the door to Ruby’s trailer closed, but it was clear that something was working. Since the trailer lunches began, your on-set chemistry became palpable. It even got to the point where the director would shout words of praise after “cut!”
Eventually, like with all movies, filming began to wrap up. The last day on set, you and Ruby spent all of your down time wrapped in each other's arms, tears falling at the thought of parting. Everyone on set sympathized with the both of you, except for the makeup artist who kept having to touch up your alien makeup after every fallen tear.
You and Ruby promised to keep in touch, and you did for a little while. But daily FaceTimes eventually became weekly phone calls, which turned into sporadic texts, until silence settled between you, save for occasional likes on social media posts. You missed her terribly, and while your pride and fear of rejection kept you from reaching back out, you couldn’t help but wonder if she was missing you too.
About eight months after shooting wrapped for “Aliens of Atlantis,” you were going over sides for an upcoming audition when you got a call from your agent. Upon answering, she announced that “Aliens of Atlantis” post-production had wrapped, and the film had a scheduled premiere where the cast would be making an appearance.
A blissful daze settled across your face at this news. Your agent kept on talking about the when, the where, and the dress code of the upcoming premiere, but you were only half-listening. Her words mushed together, flying in one ear and out the other as the only thing that mattered to you consumed your mind.
You were going to see Ruby again.
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On the morning of the premiere, you woke up with a knot in your stomach. You couldn’t tell if the cause was nerves or excitement, but you chalked it up to probably being a little of both. You tried everything to settle your stomach, from aspirin to deep breaths to simply distracting yourself with other tasks. Despite your attempts, when your driver arrived later in the day to take you to the premiere, the knot was still there and prominent as ever.
By the time you had arrived and were about to get out of the car, the knot had seemingly spread throughout your entire body, making you feel like an absolute disaster. You took out your phone and checked your reflection in the front-facing camera, just to remind yourself that you weren’t. In fact, you looked good. You were wearing a metallic blue floor-length gown as a not-so subtle nod to your alien character from the movie. Pale blue eyeshadow decorated your eyelids, and you left your hair down in loose face-framing curls. You knew the press would go crazy as soon as they saw you, and that thought alone gave you enough of a confidence boost to calm down a bit.
When the car pulled up to the red carpet, you took a deep breath and stepped out, immediately being bombarded with cameras flashing in your face. You blinked, overwhelmed at the bright lights, and quickly attempted to paste on a smile and act like this wasn’t your first red carpet event.
You stumbled down the red carpet and looked around for Ruby, but the constant camera flashes and bright lights made it difficult to see much. Every now and then you would stop to strike a pose and flash a pretty smile in some random direction, or answer one of the million questions being thrown at you.
“Who are you wearing?”
A fucking blue dress. “Valdrin Sahiti!”
“How do you feel about your first red carpet event?”
Overwhelmed. “So excited!”
“What are you most looking forward to tonight?”
Seeing Ruby again. “Everyone finally getting to see all the hard work from the cast and crew!”
After what felt like an eternity of paparazzi and bullshit answers to trivial questions, the end of the red carpet was finally approaching. You felt yourself let out a breath you didn’t know you were holding. It wasn’t easy, but you managed to make it down your first red carpet without making a complete fool of yourself.
Eventually, the cameras seemed to dissipate, focusing on the next pretty young thing that had just arrived. You blinked, trying to restore your vision infringed upon by the blinding lights. Once you could see in front of you again, you looked up, and a gulp forced itself down your throat at what might have been the prettiest sight you’d ever seen.
There, standing at the end of the red carpet, was Ruby Cruz, radiant amidst the flashing lights.
Her gown was long and form-fitting, sporting bright streaks of color and a slit up one of her legs. Dark brown curls hovered above her shoulders and cascaded down the back of her neck, while glittery red eyeshadow made her blue eyes pop. She looked so natural, posing and smiling for the cameras, that you couldn’t help but feel a bit envious of her.
Upon seeing you, Ruby’s eyes brightened, and a goofy grin spread across her face. She walked towards you, wrapping an arm around your waist and instantly making the cameras go wild. Your cheeks flushed into a bright pink tint. You missed her touch, and having her arm wrapped around you like that almost felt like deja vu.
While the both of you posed for the flashing cameras, Ruby leaned down to your ear and whispered one single sentence, the answer to a question you didn’t need to ask.
“I missed you.”
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Unsurprisingly, the movie premiere turned out to be a massive success. The audience was extremely receptive to the storyline, cheering and gasping at all the right moments. Critics even approached you after the screening to rave about your performance and promise a glowing review.
The after-party was held at a nearby banquet hall, decorated to look like the underwater city of Atlantis. Filk music blasted through speakers while an open bar served space-themed cocktails.
You were busy making your rounds, establishing connections with other attendees while sipping a ‘cosmonaut’ from the open bar. While posing for a photo with a fan, you couldn’t help but realize you hadn’t seen Ruby in a bit. You craned your neck to look for her, but she was nowhere to be found. You shrugged it off, thinking it’s just a big venue and you’d probably run into her at some point during the night.
After several photos, impromptu interviews, and business cards you had nowhere to put, you were exhausted. You tried to make yourself as invisible as possible, leaning against a curtain by the back wall and downing the last sip of your cocktail.
While scanning the room, you noticed some of your castmates appeared slightly tipsy. You felt bad for them, knowing their press interviews would come off as less than professional, but there was a small part of you that wished you had more to drink throughout the night. The party was fun, sure, but took a lot out of you, and alcohol was sure to make it more tolerable.
Suddenly, while you were immersed in watching a crew member profusely apologize to an intern she had drunkenly stumbled into, you felt a disembodied hand appear out of nowhere and wrap around your arm. The hand pulled you behind the curtain you were leaning against, causing you to gasp and drop your empty cup.
You whipped around to see who grabbed you, preparing to throw a punch or scream for help if you had to. Instead, your eyes softened and you lowered your fist upon seeing Ruby, standing there staring at you with a devilish smirk.
“Hi pretty girl.” She cooed, taking a step towards you.
“Ruby…” you half-whispered in shock, eyes traveling up and down her body. “What are you doing?”
“I missed you,” she rested her hands on your hips and bit her lip, letting an ounce of vulnerability shine through her otherwise confident exterior. “I missed this. I feel like we barely got to see each other all night.”
“Me too,” you responded, internally melting at the feeling of her warm hands on your torso.
You wrapped your arms around her neck and leaned close to her before a sense of paranoia made you backtrack. “Ruby, it’s a big party, what if someone sees us?”
Ruby simply shrugged, completely unbothered. “Like you said, it’s a big party. Our castmates are drunk, the press is too focused on capturing their embarrassing moments.”
Her words seemed to reassure you, and you pulled her close to you again, feeling the warmth of her body against yours. “I’m glad you pulled me away.”
Ruby crashed her lips against yours, forcing a soft moan to escape your throat. She pulled back, looking deep into your eyes and holding your face in her hands.
“Careful now. We don’t want anyone hearing us.”
You nodded, non-verbally promising to keep quiet before Ruby brought her lips to yours again. Both of you sighed into the kiss, eight months of absence making itself prominent with passion. She tasted like sweet nostalgia with a hint of coconut rum, probably leftover from a drink she had earlier.
Ruby pressed herself against you, and you grabbed at the back of her neck, desperate to be as close to her as possible. She kept her hands planted at your waist, thumbing over the metallic fabric of your gown. Each time her fingertips pressed into your sides sent electrifying shocks through your body, making your knees stutter and causing you to lean more into Ruby for balance.
You brought your hands up to play with one of her curls, prompting a gentle sigh to travel from her mouth into yours. A smirk appeared on your lips, realizing your beloved brunette enjoyed having her hair played with.
Just when you were about to fully take advantage of this newfound information, a sudden crash engulfed your ears, followed by a blinding light and a collective gasp. You and Ruby pulled away from each other, turning your heads to check out the commotion.
One of the interns had drunkenly stumbled into the curtain and pulled it down with him as he fell, leaving you and Ruby entangled in each other and completely exposed to the rest of the party.
All hell broke loose. Interviewers screamed questions from across the room while paparazzi cameras flashed in your face. Those without cameras pulled out their phones and filmed the both of you, desperate for their fifteen minutes of fame.
Anxiety overtook your body as you felt a lump rise to your throat and your heart sink to your feet. You turned to look at Ruby, eyes full of fear, but she wasn’t looking at you. She was looking straight at the flashing cameras, with an expression that made your blood run cold.
You had never seen her bright blue eyes filled with so much anger.
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The pit in your stomach grew as you scrolled through the tabloid headlines and Twitter articles featuring your and Ruby’s “stunt” from the other night. This was bad. So bad, that both of your agents had gotten together to hire a public relations manager just for the situation.
Two days after the movie premiere, an emergency meeting was called. Five of you were called to the manager’s office, with both of your agents sitting on either side of him, and you and Ruby placed across from the three of them.
The manager, named Rick, held out his hand and you gave him his phone back, sick of scrolling through the headlines anyway. As far as you could tell, Rick didn’t seem like a bad guy, but it was clear Ruby didn’t feel the same. She hadn’t said a word throughout the entire meeting, instead keeping her arms crossed in front of her chest and pointing a cold glare towards the man in front of her.
She didn’t trust him, and everyone in the room knew it.
Rick gave the both of you a sheepish grin. “As you both can probably see, you’re kind of the flavor of the week right now.”
Ruby’s agent nodded in agreement. “I have a friend in New York, and she heard a rumor about an SNL sketch being written about the whole thing.”
Your agent sighed, clearly having heard the rumor herself. Ruby simply scoffed and rolled her eyes.
“Is it really that big of a deal?” You piped up.
All eyes turned to look at you, making you shrink in your seat. “I mean, can’t we just wait for it to blow over? All we did was kiss at an after party.”
“It’s not like we were fucking, Rick.” Ruby growled through her teeth, causing a blush to appear on your cheeks.
Rick cleared his throat, uncomfortable with Ruby’s candidness. “Well it’s not really that simple…”
“No one knows what you are.” Your agent interrupted. “All the public knows is you were caught going at it like teenagers in a basement, and now the media is going to be on top of everything you do until they figure it out.”
Ruby’s agent nodded. “Before this, we wanted you both to appear single to the public. You’re both very attractive girls. People want you, and we want them to think they can have you.”
“But that’s not really an option now.” Rick pointed out. “Fortunately, both of you have pretty reputable status in Hollywood. People see two of their favorite actresses together, feedback is bound to be mostly positive.”
He opened up a notepad in front of him and started scribbling down something you couldn’t quite make out.
“I’m thinking, we take this relationship and go completely public. Social media posts, dates open to the paparazzi, everything. That way, the media won’t have to do any guess work and this whole thing will blow over sooner.”
Suddenly, Ruby stood up from her seat and stormed out of the room, slamming the door behind her.
“Ruby!” Her agent called after her.
She turned to flash an apologetic smile towards all the shocked faces staring back at her. “I’m sorry. She’s not usually like this. I’ll talk to her.”
She ran out of the room after Ruby, leaving Rick and your agent to go over the details of the plan. Their voices faded into the background as millions of thoughts swam through your mind. You had a bad feeling about this ‘public relationship’ idea.
How were you supposed to go public with your relationship, when you weren’t even sure if there was a relationship to go public with?
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You adjusted your oversized hat and sunglasses while staring up at the cafe sign that read “Grind n’ Dine,” shuddering at the slightly suggestive name.
One week after the meeting with Rick, he worked with your agents to schedule a public date for you and Ruby, tipping off the press to make sure there was media coverage. Grind n’ Dine, a local business, had apparently paid Rick a large sum of money to schedule your date here in the hopes that the publicity would be good for business.
Taking a deep breath, you walked in through the restaurant doors and looked around. Several members of the press were already present, wearing cameras around their necks and sipping coffee at various tables. You breathed out a sigh of relief that they didn’t recognize you yet, thankful for your agent who suggested arriving in disguise.
In the very back of the restaurant, tucked into a booth, you spotted Ruby hiding behind a menu. She had her body and hair buried under a large black hoodie, and masked her face with sunglasses similar to yours. You made your way over to her, trying to act natural, and making sure to avoid press members as much as possible in case they recognize you before you’re ready.
You slid into the seat across from her and cleared your throat to alert her of your presence. She put down her menu and laid it flat, before tilting her sunglasses down to meet your eyes.
Her blue eyes, once lively and bright, were now bloodshot and emotionless. Dark circles hung like bags underneath them, as if she hadn’t slept in days. You felt a sharp pang in your chest. Ruby had never looked at you this way before, and you wished more than anything that she would stop.
“Ready for this?” She asked, her voice monotone and lifeless.
You gulped, nodding defeatedly. “As I’ll ever be.”
Ruby removed her sunglasses and pulled down her hood, shaking out her wild brunette locks. You followed suit, taking off your hat and slipping your sunglasses into your purse.
Almost immediately, members of the press recognized the both of you, and practically trampled the poor servers and other diners to get to your booth. Cameras were suddenly shoved in your face, followed by microphones and what felt like hundreds of pointless and rather invading questions.
“Is this a date? How would you define your relationship?”
“If you had to describe your sex life using only three words, what would they be?”
“Ruby! Do you think every liberal democrat should take home a migrant to show their support for the proposed open border policy?”
The two of you mumbled terse responses to some of the questions, and completely ignored others. After several minutes of verbal torture, a perky blonde waitress fought her way through the press and stopped at the end of your table. She sported a wide politician's smile not directed at the two of you, instead flashed to the surrounding cameras in search of fifteen minutes of fame.
“Hi guys,” she started, her voice unnaturally high pitched. “My name is Bethany, what can I get started for you today?”
“I’ll have a quinoa salad and cranberry juice, please.” You answered, handing Bethany your menu.
The press murmured imperceptible comments regarding your order, some even scribbling notes on napkins. “Quinoa… salad…”
“Just a coffee’s fine.” Ruby mumbled, order being followed by press comments as well.
As soon as Bethany walked away, the paparazzi shoved the cameras back in your face and bombarded you and Ruby with questions once more.
“Did you order cranberry juice because you like cranberry juice or because you have a UTI? How did you get this UTI?”
“I noticed you were the only one who ordered food. Could it be because you’re eating for two?”
“Speaking of, why didn’t you order food, Ruby? Are you battling some kind of eating disorder? Would you like to comment on it?”
“Enough!” Ruby exclaimed, perhaps louder than she should have.
Immediately, the press was silent, with only the sound of sporadic camera clicks being heard. Ruby turned to look at you, tears starting to well in her tired eyes.
“I’m sorry, I can’t do this…” she whispered, getting up and running out of the restaurant.
“Ruby! Wait, please!” You stood up and ran after her, leaving the paparazzi in the dust behind you.
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You found Ruby leaning against a building across the cafe. She had her head resting against the cool brick, and her face pointed to the sky while she blinked back tears threatening to fall.
A lump formed in your throat as you started to approach her. You couldn’t stand to see her like this. She looked so… miserable.
“Ruby…” you muttered softly, reaching out your hand.
She crossed her arms over her chest and glared at the concrete, refusing to look you in the eye. “I just wasn’t hungry! It’s barely ten in the fucking morning!”
You sighed. “Ruby, we both know that’s not what this is about. What’s going on?”
She sniffed, and focused her gaze on something behind you. “Can we… go somewhere else?”
Turning to see what Ruby was looking at, you noticed a teenage girl filming the two of you on her phone. You rolled your eyes, completely exasperated at this point.
“Let’s go.” You muttered, grabbing her hand to pull her away.
It didn’t take long to find a nearby alleyway, deserted except for an empty dumpster. You dragged Ruby into the back, letting go of her hand once the coast was clear.
“Talk.”
The pale brunette pushed her bangs out of her face, blinking a couple times while gathering her thoughts.
“I just… this is why my Instagram is private. This is why I’ve never explicitly labeled my sexuality. This is why I rarely talk about my personal life! I don’t want the media invading my space! I don’t want random strangers knowing intimate details about my life! It’s fucking freaky!”
You nodded, understanding her perspective, especially as you’d been recently dealing with the wrath of the paparazzi as well. She continued.
“I mean fuck! I can’t even order a damn coffee without some tabloid claiming I have a fucking eating disorder!”
Her breathing seemed to be evening out the more she spoke. She let out a shuddering breath and crossed her arms, staring at the gravel beneath her feet.
“I just… I just wanted to kiss you at an after-party. I missed you. And now everyone’s forcing us to be in this relationship and make it public but…”
“But no one asked us if we were even together,” you finished.
She nodded. “Exactly! We never even had a conversation just between us. Everyone just assumed.”
You pulled the brunette girl into your arms, wrapping them around her torso. She buried her face in the crook of your neck as you stroked her soft locks.
“I’m sorry,” you whispered. “If I had known that’s how you felt…”
“No.” She interrupted. “It wasn’t you. You didn’t do anything, I… listen…”
She pulled away, and you felt a pit form in your stomach. You waited for her to tell you that she didn’t want to see you again, that it was too hard, that it meant nothing.
You held your breath as she took your face in her hands, her blue eyes piercing into yours.
“I like you.”
“You… huh?” Shock painted your features as Ruby said the last thing you were expecting to hear.
“I like you.” She repeated, the corners of her mouth slightly upturned. “I meant it when I said I missed you. I couldn’t stop thinking about you the entire eight months we didn’t talk. I should have reached out more, I don’t know why I didn’t. I guess I was scared? I don’t know…”
She was babbling, and you didn’t think she could get any cuter. You took her hands off your face and held them in yours, flashing her an encouraging smile.
“I like you too,” you replied giddily. “More than you know.”
Ruby chuckled, a faint blush tinting her cheeks. She stared down at the gravel again, chewing on her lip before speaking.
“I like you… I really do, but if we’re gonna start this… something, I’d want to take it slow and be completely private. No socials, no media, at least for now. Would… that be something you’re okay with?”
You squeezed her hands, flashing her a goofy grin. “I would… love that, actually.”
As you stared at your former celebrity crush, turned co-star, turned friend, turned… something, a wave of courage suddenly washed over you. Letting go of her hands, you seized her face and brought your lips to hers, tentatively, testing the waters. She gasped, but soon kissed back, sighing as she wrapped her arms around your neck and leaned into your body.
You moved your hand towards the back of her neck, then slowly inched upwards until your fingers were entangled in her hair. An almost inaudible moan escaped her lips and vibrated against yours as you played with her soft tresses. You smirked into the kiss, remembering exactly how much she liked having her hair played with before getting caught at the after-party.
Finally, after what could have been an eternity, you pulled away from each other. The two of you gasped for breath, both smiling like giddy children at the other.
“So… what now?” You asked breathlessly.
Ruby hummed to herself, seemingly in thought. “We could… go on a real date? Just you and me? No paparazzi. There’s this great little hole-in-the-wall place I like to go to when I don’t want to get recognized.”
You tilted your head, shooting her a lopsided smile. “That sounds perfect, actually.”
Before leaving the alleyway, Ruby put her sunglasses back on and pulled her hood over her head again, while you dug your sunglasses out of your purse and readjusted your hat. The two of you were disguised, hidden from the world, but happy to be able to pursue each other away from public opinion.
Ruby reached out her hand, her blue eyes somehow still managing to shine behind her sunglasses. “Ready for this?”
You smiled back at her, taking her hand and intertwining her fingers with yours. “As I’ll ever be.”
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the-fandom-is-now-my-life · 3 months ago
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Hello I love you and your tdbk cats sm can we put costumes on them? :3
I NEED to see sho dress up in ribbons and a little tutu, it's for my mental health (?
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Will play dress up willingly
Kaito LOVES attention, as long as you are solely focused on him and nobody else he doesn't mind brushing his hair, dressing him up or putting bows in his fur. It might be because he was the runt of his litter and a stray but he loves the affection.
Leo is a mini internet celebrity! Every so often he does a photoshoot with so many different outfits and accessories. He is such a spoiled brat who adores being the center of attention and because of it loves every step of it
Haru and Towa have matching accessories!!! At first Haru refuses, he has to scout the garden!! But Towa manages to convince him after saving Peekaboo from Taiga. On the other hand Towa LOVES all the attention of getting brushed and styled and getting clothed!!
Romeo is a special case, naturally, he doesn't allow everything. He is strict with it being nice collars and ribbons, nothing too in bad taste. At most you could link a bejeweled bat charm in his collar but he does let you brush his .
Dress Haku as a caterpillar because he is a snuggle bug, or rather as a baby kangaroo given how much he likes to nap in your hoodies’ pocket. Regardless he doesn't care too much about it but likes the attention.
Zenji chimes in singing when you dress Haku so you assume he wants to be dressed up too, sadly anything you put doesn't stay long, any ribbons on his tail get undone and clothes slip off. He seems saddened by that so kiss and hug him.
Allows you to dress him up
Following the rule of the least effort, Jin doesn't want to move much from his loafing position next to the AC so if whatever you are doing isn't very intrusive (think crowns or headbands) he won't do much more than look at you nasty but if it's something you have to manhandle him in you might get a hiss or even a scratch.
Even if Thoma isn't excited about it he allows you to put him accessories or vests as long as they don't bother his movements too much
Luca doesn't really understand why you like to see him so much but he stands there like a gentleman.
Alan is so baby coded even if he is so huge! Even if he isn't especially keen on being a dress up doll he accepts it without any complains
I think that if you managed to put things on Romeo and Taiga he might understand and allow you something. Imagine Ritsu with a little tie!!!!
Old man Ed truly doesn't care as long as he can sleep jajaj so feel free to tie a cloak around his shoulders and call him a vampire
Is anyone surprised Jiro doesn't care? As long as it doesn't hurt him or Yuri doesn't pull it out of him he is keeping it
Get away from him
Sho is usually a very agreeable kitty so it's surprising when he hisses at you when you get closer to him with one of Leo's bows in your hands. He ends up being pinned down by Leo and you get to tie a ribbon in his fur. Even if it was against his will he keeps it on.
Ren is this close 🤏 to bitting if you get close with a costume.
If Ren was close, Taiga would maul your hand open if you attempt to manhandle. He isn't feral but he acts like that sometimes, don't test your luck.
Subaru doesn't like to be touched! He is very touch adverse and putting them in costumes requires a fair bit of touching, he already accepted it when he was an actor cat but he retired so don't force him.
Rui runs away when you attempt to hold him like always he runs off
Lyca doesn't have as much of a problem being touched for a long time but he is surrounded by cats he mimics that don't really allow you to (Subaru and Rui) so he doesn't allow you to put anything clearly costume-y just like them.
He is one of the smallest cats so Yuri hates anything that might make you think he isn't as imposing as any of the other cats, that includes most ways of baby talking and making him wear things
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eeldritchblast · 1 year ago
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Lae'zel is Autistic
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(Note: This post was written by someone with professionally diagnosed autism. A lot of what I'm about to say of Lae'zel, I can personally relate to! This is not intended as negativity or hatred of her character; rather, it is one of the reasons I adore her.)
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I really don't like that the writers have attempted to tone down Lae'zel's "rudeness" perceived by the larger fanbase. It reminds me too much of how "rudeness" is so often less about hostility and more about one's ability to perform social interactions to the standards of neurotypical people. So for the writers to decide that Lae'zel is too "rude" for not saying her please and thank yous every time she speaks, for being direct, for struggling to have two-sided conversations... well, to me, that's just saying that there was something wrong with her they felt the need to fix. I spent years with people trying to "fix" me in special ed. To teach me how to present as neurotypical, like memorizing appropriate responses to common questions, and pretending to hold eye contact by looking at people's lips. While I will admit it helps me in the workplace for example to perform these things, it also taught me to hate myself for being faulty in the first place. That's something I still struggle with to this day. So when a character like Lae'zel comes along, who I can relate to in her coded autism, I don't want to see her changed. I want to see her celebrated.
Here are some of the signs of autism I've noticed in Lae'zel:
Difficulty regulating and understanding emotion:
Lae'zel is a very passionate person, and can get carried away by that passion. At the same time, she is not very good at self-inventory of her emotions. After she defies Vlaakith in Act 3, she asks the player to help her understand what she is feeling, because she cannot place it herself.
Directness:
As said above, Lae'zel is vert blunt in the way she communicates. If you've picked up the game only in later patches, let me tell you that she was originally even more so. If the player asks Lae'zel why she is the way she is, she says it's just because she is githyanki. While I certainly think some of this could be attributed to a difference in culture, we meet other githyanki, and they do not carry the same speech and manner she has.
Taking things literally:
Lae'zel equally does not understand indirectness from others, or idioms. For example, when Shadowheart asks if they have "buried the hatchet" between them, (an American idiom to mean "making peace" which by the way, is not a very appropriate idiom,) she answers with "why would I bury a weapon?" Again, this could be attributed to a difference in background, but nonetheless something to relate to.
Dislike of small talk:
Literally the first thing Lae'zel says to you after you recruit her is, "chatter already? Tas'ki."
Inflection:
Lae'zel is voiced with minimal modulation of intonation or pitch. As such, she sounds monotone and serious, even when the words she says are lighthearted or joking.
Difficulty handling change of routine/expectancy:
When things do not go as Lae'zel is determined they are supposed to go--for example, the machine she thinks will remove her tadpole not working as she believed it would--she has wild, uncontrolled outbursts.
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There's probably even more one could list here, but for now I'm done. I may edit this later, though.
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max1461 · 3 months ago
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I didn't know rationalism of the online rationalists was not the same as the one that has the Wikipedia article. When I first saw the term on Tumblr I went to that article and skimmed it and decided I don't really get what those bloggers' perspectives are. After your post I now have even less knowledge than I did before.
The following is an oversimplification, so for those who have quibbles with the history here, well, forgive me.
Online rationalism was founded by two guys named Eliezer Yudkowsky and Robin Hanson on the blog LessWrong. Of these two figures Yudkowsky has been much more influential. The ideology that Yudkowsky promoted is roughly as follows:
humans are, relatively soon, likely to develop a superintelligent AI which has the capacity to self-improve by rewriting its own code. This will cause the AI's intelligence to rapidly explode beyond anything we can imagine, a process which rationalists onomatopoetically call "FOOM".
This superintelligent AI, if it could be harnessed and controlled, could cure death, and possibly revive all already-dead humans in a simulated world, leading to a technological utopia in which humans have merged with machines; this is called "the singularity" (the idea of the singularity predates the rationalists, and is a broader transhumanist trope).
However, it is almost certain that a superintelligent AI could not be harnessed and controlled; in fact, if such an AI was created, there is a very high probability that it would end the world (in rationalist jargon this is called an "x-risk"), perhaps usurping all of the accessible matter and energy on earth, then in the solar system, then in the galaxy and beyond in pursuit of its inscrutable goals. Thus, humans have a responsibility to make sure we never create such a superintelligent AI (in a recent op-ed in Time, Yudkowsky went so far as to say that the US should use drone strikes to destroy any datacenter found to be training a large AI model).
The reason that people do not recognize the truths above is because people are too irrational to see them. Therefore, people need to be taught to be more rational, by Yudkowsky via the blog LessWrong. The tenets of being more rational are laid out largely in a series of blog posts known as "The Sequences", later published as a book. The main take-aways are: (1) use Bayes' Theorem all the time to estimate the probability of things, and (2) to eliminate one's various cognitive biases, as outlined in The Sequences.
LessWrong attracted a lot of people who did not agree with Yudkowsky about AI, but who liked the Bayes' Theorem stuff and the commentary on cognitive biases. There is a joke that "anyone who has ever disagreed with Yudkowsky is a rationalist". The people who settled on LessWrong were largely drawn from the milieu of Bay Area tech workers, economics blog enthusiasts, and sci-fi fans. They would come to be known as LessWrongers, rationalists, or aspiring rationals. From this group, two major subgroups worth mentioning were spawned:
First is the Effective Altruists. Effective Altruism, to my knowledge, isn't a strictly LessWronger phenomenon, and has also been influenced majorly by philosophers like Peter Singer. However, they have been so intertwined with LessWrongers throughout their history that I think they are worth mentioning as essentially an offshoot of rationalism.
Effective Altruists believe that, in order to do the most good in the world, one should use one's money in a way that does the maximum amount of good per dollar. Rather than e.g. donating to charities willy-nilly based on what feels important, one should use quantitative methods to estimate how much impact each dollar is making, and donate in a way which maximizes that. The Effective Altruists are split along one main ideological line: neartermism vs. longtermism. The neartermists are basically focused on what we would traditionally think of as charitable activities: fighting disease, giving people clean water, that kind of stuff. I think neartermist Effective Altruism is pretty sensible, and I think they've done a lot of good work evaluating charities and so on. GiveWill is an essentially neartermist Effective Altruist organization, and I think their activities are very worth supporting.
The longtermists, on the other hand, are focused on "the long-term interests of humanity". They are, well, in my opinion, basically a bunch of people trying to turn their sci-fi fantasies into a reality. They are often very worried about AI x-risk, like Yudkowsky, and they're often pro-singularity, and sometimes pro-eugenics, and a bunch of other stuff. Remember Sam Bankman-Fried, the guy who committed the largest act of financial fraud in human history? Well, he was an Effective Altruist with some longertermist sympathies. Some of the money that he stole he actually gave to worthwhile charities, but some of it he used on stupid longtermist sci-fi fantasy shit. His girlfriend Caroline Ellison, who helped him do a bunch of that fraud, was a member of rationalist tumblr. Some of my mutuals were mutuals with her.
The other major group spawned out of LessWrong were the Neoreactionaries, or NRx. These guys, too, weren't a purely LessWronger phenomenon; they were also majorly influenced by people such as the philosopher Nick Land (former student of Baudrillard, who took a far-right turn in the 2000s and started advocating for "hyper-racism") and blogger Curtis Yarvin a.k.a. "Mencius Moldbug". These guys are a rag-tag group of authoritarians, eugenicists, and racists, who are interested in rationality insofar as they view it as a path that leads to their desired sci-fi-inflected far-right future.
Oh, right, last but not least I should define the term "rat-adj". It means "rationalist-adjacent". Uh. So, I was never a LessWronger, and as I think my description makes clear, I find like 90% of this rationalist stuff either goofy or actively harmful. But I have, somehow, ended up basically acquainted with a bunch of people formerly or presently part of the LessWrong milieu, and in light of this I am what one calls "rationalist-adjacent". I talk to various rationalist bloggers somewhat often. And most of them are much more normal than all this would suggest, part of the rationalist discursive sphere but not really believers in the imminent AI apocalypse. Uh. So, there you go.
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crazylittlejester · 6 months ago
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autistic elric brothers? (and winry)
please let me hear the headcanons
name me one neurotypical in fma. i’ll wait. /j
fr tho theyre SO autistic coded
- I believe in my HEART the reason Ed doesn’t wear that uniform isn’t JUST because he thinks it’s stupid, he also just absolutely hates the texture of it. He put it on his body exactly one time and went “absolutely the FUCK not” and has since transmuted it into something else to take up less space
- It’s very hard for Alphonse to regulate himself because he has no sense of touch and can’t feel anything and he feels pretty detached from reality a lot of the time, but he likes to just talk and make noise. Like banging his gloves together, just because he can, because it’s proof to him he’s still here
- I can see Edward stimming by waiting until his ankle starts to get creaky and then just rocking it from side to side and listening to the squeaks. He gets the nice feeling of moving his whole leg with his ankle, plus the bonus of the obnoxious little sounds. Mustang wants to strangle him for it, Winry wants him dead, Alphonse just wants him to oil the joint before Winry rips his leg off
- Winry and Ed are BOTH tappers when they’re thinking. Fingers on the desk, foot on the floor, doesn’t matter. Tap tap tap tap tap tap tap. Poor granny and alphonse are just so used to it by now, bless them
- Winry and Ed definitely just have YAP sessions where they ramble about their hyperfixations for literal hours on end. They don’t really understand too much about the other one’s thing, but theyre very supportive
- When Alphonse gets his body back he very much becomes obsessed with the ✨Textures✨ of different things. He needs to touch EVERYTHING and just feel it, and one of his favorite stims becomes rubbing a very nice very specific rock he found
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aropride · 1 year ago
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i saw a post the other day that said that gen z/gen alpha say "unalive" and "seggs" and stuff bc they're afraid of being "punished by an invisible force" and while i do think that the self-censoring sometimes unnecessary and worrying, i also don't think they're self-censoring for no reason.
i think there are a lot of situations where talking about suicide/death in general and sex outright would be punished by very real visible forces like parents and teachers and instagram community guidelines. like these kids (i say kids but i know people my age (20) do this, i feel like it's mostly younger genz and genalpha though at least in my experience) aren't just self-policing and self-censoring for no reason. some creators learned to adapt their language to unclear nebulous guidelines to try and avoid their accounts being taken down or their videos being shown to fewer people, then people started assuming any mentions of death or sex would be punished and started doing the same thing, and now younger kids have picked up on it bc they're online a lot and don't know any different.
but that's not the only part of this that matters bc while that is strange and a little dystopian. there are also offline real-life reasons kids would be scared to talk about this shit with actual words. like i was raised very christian, evangelical, not quite fundamentalist, "we don't use labels but we have stage lights for the worship songs but don't wear skirts above the knee" type of thing. my parents didn't teach me about sex until they found out i would have a sex ed class bc they had to sign a permission slip. and then they gave me a book for kids about sex that was heavily christian, abstinence-only, deeply homophobic etc. it didn't teach about birth control, about what things are not normal, any of that. and i was not raised in a way where i was even the slightest bit comfortable asking my parents or talking about it at all. my twin brother got the same book and would talk about sex or make jokes about it and our parents would get upset because it was "inappropriate" and he shouldn't be thinking about that or whatever. and if i had tried to talk about like, menstrual health or signs of abuse or even just made a joke about sex at all my parents would have been upset.
you can probably guess this from what i just said but unsurprisingly my parents weren't big on being upfront about mental health issues either. i have been depressed since before i can remember and was suicidal by the time i was eleven and i had no idea that the way i was feeling wasn't normal or that there was a word for it. i don't remember when i learned about suicide but i know my dad was at least willing to say the word in conversation when i was 12, which my mother wasn't happy about because it was "too dark" a conversation to be having (he had been telling me about a friend he had in college, specifically about how he had recovered from substance abuse issues and suicidal ideation).
and my parents were definitely not normal but there are objectively situations where parents are way worse about this type of thing. there are absolutely kids who aren't allowed to say words like suicide and death and sex. and they're not afraid of algorithms, there are real-life offline consequences if they slip up. so they self-censor, they talk quietly in the lunchroom with codewords and euphemisms with their friends. and that's not even to mention school, and how kids will get in trouble for anything an adult doesn't want them to talk about, how they can get in, again, real-life offline trouble for speaking frankly about this type of thing. because it's "inappropriate," because it's "upsetting," because their teacher is having a bad day, because god said not to, because they don't want their dm to a friend on tiktok to be flagged.
and i would much rather kids talk about these things with sometimes-insensitive code words than to not talk about them at all. if it's a choice between someone coming out as "tr4ns" to their friend and not having someone to support them at all, if it's between saying they want to "unalive" themself and never seeking help, i want them to go the sometimes-silly code word route. because i think they should be allowed to talk about these things and if they're not i think they have the right to try to do it anyway. the unnecessary self-censorship has been criticized to hell and back and i'm not saying it shouldn't be, especially when it's adults saying these things in real life situations. i'm just saying i think kids have a lot more pressure to censor themselves than people think, even offline.
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voidpacifist · 1 year ago
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things I loved about season four of sex ed (spoilers ahead)
the amount of representation present this season. the disability rep, the queer and trans rep, how not shy the writers were confronting different trans and disability rights issues head on.
eric's arc with his religion and his gayness and how he was able to reconcile the two. this one really hit home for me as someone who is both queer and a person of faith. I love getting to see gayness have a place within faith, it just healed something for me, okay?
otis was so classically otis but he finally (FINALLY) acknowledged his own idiosyncrasies without just writing them off as being the fault of wounds in his life. by the end of ep 8 he was dedicated to making things better for himself and for other people and I'm actually so proud of him for that.
aimee's journey with healing from her SA trauma and how she navigated a new relationship with that. also I know it probably wasn't intentional but she's a very autistic coded character to me and watching her flourish as herself with isaac just did something so special to my heart. I would level cities for her.
and adam too!! him finally getting the closure he needed with eric and them communicating !!!! the scene at erin wiley's funeral when eric is able to tell adam how genuinely proud of him he is, just,,,my heart I love it when people get to heal !! also again with the unintentional neurodivergent rep, like come on - sitting undiagnosed by yourself, handsome? he's just like me fr.
I was worried the writers wouldn't do isaac's character justice, even though he was given a good arc in season three I was still anxious about where they would take it now that maeve was overseas and honestly, they didn't give him very much of a story outside of his history and who he was when he was with maeve. similar to aimee with him, I really liked watching more of his artistic traits pop out and I loved seeing him have a healthy friendship with someone. even better, I love it when the feelings he harbored for that person were mutual with no strings attached. I wasn't expecting him and aimee to be endgame but I'm absolutely not disappointed about it (you can tell he's my fav because I've written the longest paragraph about him so far).
cal and aisha and pk. need I say anything more? my only gripe is that I wish we could have had a glimpse of the three of them on a date or even see if there were other people in the polycule but that's okay !! I also just really loved cal's journey with themself and I loved getting to see them supported for their identity it meant so very much to me.
lastly but certainly not the least, I loved that otis and o ended on mutually agreeable terms with each other, it just really added to the whole theme of trying to heal and open new doors and be okay with things not being in control all the time. it was especially touching that he gave his position as therapist to her because he knew and acknowledged he had work to do on himself like !!! very rare otis w but totally welcomed. had the show continued I would have loved to see more development w him.
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crimson-and-clover-1717 · 14 hours ago
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Stede Bonnet and Emotional Support
Stede supports Ed and Izzy emotionally at various times, but the places this comes from within Stede is different, and we feel that on screen.
For Ed, one of the most significant moments is YWFTW01. Stede’s supported Ed once already that evening by causing the French crowd to set fire to their ship. Stede is very much in his head, I think, during that incident.
But something very different happens in the moonlight scene. Stede is no longer reasoning. He’s moved to intuition. He’s in flow. Something clicks on impulse.
‘Look at that!’ He half-exclaims, half-whispers. Stede is talking to Ed, but he’s speaking partially to himself too in wonder.
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Stede’s face as he looks at the silk in Ed’s pocket
‘You wear fine things well’. The first part, Stede is still staring at the now-pocketed silk, before moving his eyes up to meet Ed’s. As much as this is a genuine compliment to Ed, Stede’s also lost in the gentle delight of the moment himself.
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’You wear fine things well’
No filter; Stede just goes with his instincts. His face and voice are soft. He delivers one of the greatest lines and moments. And there is a frisson, but it’s so…ingenuous. Stede’s falling in love, doesn’t yet know it, but cannot hide it from Ed.
Now, Stede also helps support Izzy emotionally in 205; and I do wonder if the idea there is a frisson is due to there being a subconscious link with Stede’s usual emotional supporting of Ed (not only YWFTW01, but the bathtub scene, couch scene…).
Stede’s kindness is intoxicating. It’s seductive. For me though, the whole tone of this scene with Izzy is different to anything shown or felt in YWFTW01 or elsewhere with Ed.
The scene feels a little rehearsed and mostly reasoned. There’s nothing impulsive or gut-centred here. It’s not that Stede isn’t using his emotional intelligence, but it doesn’t come from an intuitive place. The emotional centres of Stede’s mind aren’t triggered the same by Izzy as by Ed.
What happens here is very carefully thought through. Stede considers two things which make Izzy tick…
One is being held in high-esteem by Blackbeard - and Stede very carefully says ‘Blackbeard’, not ‘Ed’. He knows where Izzy’s emotional fault-line is. But Stede hasn’t come to gloat. Ed, for one, is not a prize. He carefully relays a compliment, true or not, which Izzy will enjoy.
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‘But Blackbeard did say he credits you with a lot of his skills’
What Stede does also is understand the second thing needed. Izzy needs to feel important. So Stede gives him that outlet through the mentor role. Because if you’re mentoring the captain, then you must be pretty special. And Stede might enjoy having Izzy’s approval even if it doesn’t have much weight, and is likely linked in some way to his own unresolved father-issues. This strange little set up seems to work for both even though nothing concrete is achieved.
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‘Perhaps I could learn at the feet of one of the greats’
Stede’s whole face and voice are different than 105. He’s being measured and kind, but there’s no softness or dreaminess. Stede’s thinking on his feet at times, but I feel it’s based on quick reasoning not emotional intuition. There’s an instinctiveness to Ed and Stede which cannot be replicated with anyone else, certainly not with Izzy. There is no frisson here, and this is a personal hill I will die on.
Stede’s demonstrating horizontal leadership. An olive branch. He’s treating Izzy as forgiven because that is the code by which he and the crew live. But it’s also to raise self-esteem, and stop any further plotting and mischief. It’s seeing and treating Izzy as important as a means of reining him in.
But in canon, only Ed can cause the feelings which resonate in those moonlight looks appearing upon Stede’s face.
The only person Stede seduces - unintentionally or otherwise - is Ed. And the only individual who seduces Stede, is Ed.
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askfallenroyalty · 9 months ago
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ok so for more info:
my two programmer friends have just read FR and agreed to help with the game- I feel DOWN is necessary for FR to work -it sets up crucial characterization and plot details that the story needs (at the very least to be set up) and with them helping it's going to turn out as I wanted it.
As mentioned before, I had trouble because I was manually coding the first cutscene (which has music!) and it was. a nightmare. but ToMo actually knows how to do charting for music and so we're rebuilding it to be like??? an ACTUALLY good coded thing that isn't a nightmare??? dang fr this is more than anything i could have dreamed of.
meanwhile, i've been talking with multiple people about the writing (sorry if you reached out and i didn't respond, I've been very anxious about getting help. I'll respond properly soon!) and I hit a breakthrough and its going smoothly now ;v; I hope by the time the side-story is finished, I'll be ready to draw out the chapter for real!
NightFell is still my biggest priority but we've (roughly) hit a milestone that means production on my end can slow down a bit until we finish up some details. which is why I've got so much free time on NF lately! I'm very optimistic for big things from these two projects this year hehe
under the read-more is a transcript of the grey-ed text that i felt was too long for the alt text:
in grey text the following is written: oh my god i'm so sorry i have been trying to get this story to work for so long you have no idea no idea i'ts been so horrible trying to make the game and chp 3 work but now i've got help and they're my awesome friends and i'm cryin happy i just wanna make this thing and make it as good as it can be
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velvetvexations · 24 days ago
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Really love how every time I argue with people on here about how actually trans men do not generally have it meaningfully better than trans women, people avoid actually explaining their points or providing sources and start calling me a little boy. Very fun. Love that. It's so fun to be insulted for asking asking people to explain their point
No one can actually explain that.
rhea ripley is so hot. and for what
for me to be all Weird Trans Woman about her
Honestly as an non binary person, I feel more and more pushed out of the community with the serious adherence to the binary. "if you Id as this you MUST be this thing, you're you're a liar and a faker and you're hurting other trans people" that, and the denial of trans men's oppression. It's just cruel and bitter, and seeing other trans people go down this path is pretty disheartening
it's so depressing
Well, you see, it's not like saying they're transitioning from black to white, because OBVIOUSLY, just like race, your soulgender is immediately apparent to everyone as soon as you plop out the womb
lmao so true
(also I've heard soulgender is a Black thing and it should be spelled with like, a space or a hyphen? so I'm probably gonna do that from now on)
"Trans men are the White People of the trans community" Oh okay so yeah this is just "Ace people are the White People of the Queer Community" all over again huh Begging other whities to stop comparing race and gender like this, makes you look stupid as fuck
pls
Fascinated to know if the "All trans women are nonbinary" crowd also believe all trans men are nonbinary
you'd think so the way they insist trans men cling to being AFAB lmao
Went to check /-/'s blog and she's reblogging pro Chat-GPT and anti-copyright posts now
I'm tapping the sign.
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as a nonbinary thing i feel like so much tma/tme shit just completely fucking forgets us like im not „occasionally mistaken as a trans woman” its a fucking coin flip!!!!!!!! my „AGAB” doesbt matter 2 ppl outside the the internet!!!!! all that matters is no matter what i wear no one wants me i their bathroom!!!!!
people don't even just hate you for when they mistake you for a trans woman anon they hate non-binary people AFAB too
i kinda feel like the discourse is becoming more mainstream now. im seeing a lot of trans bloggers who dont post much about trans issues making posts about it (usually along the lines of "can we be normal about trans guys please" which is nice)
good maybe the backlash will finally kick in
Idk if this is me generalizing but I’ve started noticing that headcanons of canonically male characters as trans women that get traction are usually skinny and have trauma or coded with anxiety or depression. Like idk if that means literally anything but just a weird observation I had
a lotta people on here literally define being a woman as when bad things happen to you lmao
I was looking at the Patricia Taxxon stuff (funny enough, did actually see you @ ed in deleted replies) and I saw the sentence “However, being discriminated on the basis of being perceived as a manly woman is just an adverse effect of transmisogyny directed towards trans men.” Which. Hey now. What about butch women. Like how does that not uniquely apply to cis butch lesbians, even if we ignore trans men entirely.
MAINSTREAM SOCIETY LOVES TOMBOYS
Man. It really sucks when a popular-ish figure you look up to turns out to be transandrophobic. Should have seen it coming ig. She was intersexist too, and those often go hand in hand.
well I mean it sounds like you shouldn't have looked up to her already lmao
IIRC from old drama, Patricia Taxxon also thinks toxic masculinity isn't a real thing that can harm men because it's just splash damage from misogyny and they should get over it, lol, so I'm not surprised if she's turned out to be weird about trans men
lmao literally just that radfem-libfem feminism-is-for-women comic huh
Tragic: local man forced to actually read Serano's writing for the theory he's trying to make even though the way she talks about transmasculinity and female gender nonconformity gives him a headache
F
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