#this episode is a literal soap opera

[preacherboyd]

OZ | 3x07 Secret Identities

[aunmenosheteroenespanol]

911 3x06 Monsters and the award for funniest B-plot goes to: adult man terrorized by small bird

[so-you-melted-22]

i might get an internship at the sturm der liebe set so guess what im fucking watching tonight

[gaystardykeco]

desperate housewives is so funny bc every time a character has more than one kid they just completely forget at least one of them exists for long chunks of time

[themthistles]

watching kairos can't stop thinking about that star wars post it would be so good if it was good

[pisshandkerchief]

gonna be honest I'm not even sure what's going on in doctor who anymore

[babygirlracing]

Bro house of the dragon is the most boring show ever created why was it so hyped 💀

[tealvenetianmask]

A lot of the discourse on The Full Moon/Apology Tour has revolved around the pedestals that our boys put each other on. But I think the pedestal Stolas has Blitz on in particular often gets misunderstood.

I've seen a lot of takes that says that Stolas can't really love Blitz. He just loves the idea of Blitz . . . the one he's built up in his head based on romance novels and rom-coms and soap operas.

I think the reality is more complicated, and that even though, yes, Stolas idealizes Blitz, he also very much loves Blitz for his true self.

Let's look at some times when Stolas saw "the real Blitz," as his quirky, resilient, innovative, low-class self, and very much loved that person, and not just the knight in shining armor version of him.

The Circus.

Some have used this moment to say that Stolas idealized Blitz as a fantasy of what it must be like to be free.

And . . . yes. BUT ALSO. He only falls more in love (in a kid-crush kind of way) when he sees Blitz mess up on stage, get booed by the crowd, and make a joke that's clever but quite dark and niche. Creatively, to work his way through a difficult situation. There is SO MUCH in this short minute that reveals to us AND TO STOLAS who Blitz really is.

Seeing Stars

Oh boy. Let's make a list. I'm too tired to make this exhaustive, but in this episode, Stolas sees Blitz

Being careless in a way that puts Octavia in danger

Using an absolutely stupid costume to disguise himself

Getting terrible stage fright

Going way off script in the sitcom in (again) a way that's niche humor and does not appeal to most of the audience

LITERALLY HAVING A BREAK FROM REALITY AND SHOOTING UP THE TV STUDIO

Okay, so when Via is in danger, Stolas is unambiguously peeved by the mistake, but he forgives Blitz because Blitz puts in effort to find Via and make it right.

And in the rest of these instances, Stolas EITHER affirmatively likes the cringy and silly side of Blitz's personality:

Or without the slightest hesitation, when Blitz shows a real weakness, focuses not on disappointment that this man is not his perfect soap opera hero, but puts that aside and tries to help Blitz get out of trouble.

There's also this moment in Western Energy where Stolas is absolutely unbothered by Blitz's atrocious spelling and is genuinely just happy to think for a moment that Blitz cares. I feel like someone COULD twist this to be about Stolas having blinders on about what's right in front of him, but I don't think so. I think he's fine with Blitz not having all the same strengths that his society clearly values, and just wants to be loved back by this person who he has genuine feelings for.

So what doesn't Stolas know about Blitz before The Full Moon/Apology Tour? He doesn't know that Blitz hates himself. He doesn't know that Blitz pushes away people he cares about. He knows that Blitz has walls up but doesn't know why. You can fall for someone without knowing their deepest darkest hurts-- you can even love them. But you do need to know these things to have a deeper relationship with the person.

His focus on romantic media is a problem because it forms his expectations about relationships, not necessarily because it blinds him to who Blitz is. He wants to be rescued. He wants to be chased after. He doesn't understand that good relationships take a lot of work . . . and he'll need to learn that.

But he doesn't just love Blitz for these ideas. He loves Blitz for being Blitz.

This, like many of these essays, was inspired by a conversation with @akirathedramaqueen.

[mysticwinterkit]

“Audience, did you ever think you’d see a soap opera about two minecrafters and a horse?”

That’s literally every episode 1, Etho. What do you think we’re tuning in for? The red stone???

[cookie-crumblr]

Desperate Cookies<3

a Dark Desperate housewives/weeds style F!Reader X multiple Yan OC’s (M!doctor/Vet Ivar, F!bully Serana, M!Professor Reichsgraf, +more)

Episode 1~

Episode 2 here>>

MINORS DNI!

CW: Fem! Reader, reader has a vagina, reader referred to as she/her, reader has a bad relationship with food and her body(i usually add a lil comment to hopefully make it a little easier to read), threats with gun violence, guns, HARD DRUG USEAGE by reader and pm everyone else tbh, cervix fucking(just about), names against reader (dumb whore, little cocksleeve, ) p in v, failing marriage(for now 😚✨), cheating on both sides mentioned,

Disclaimer: I fully expect you to not like reader/not relate to reader, this is purely for entertainment and i implore you to think of it more like you’re an actor in a crazy DARK soap opera! :3 or this is a chance to get all the chaos out of your system, like me!

(DISCLAIMER: don’t do drugs plz, coke literally only lasts like 15 minutes, and it’s so dangerous. smoke pot instead if you need something and are able to responsibly an all that🥰✨! this is just how this reader feels)

Song rec: Do I make you Nervous? by Lilyisthatyou

“What!? What do you mean ‘lost’” You scrunch your two fingers in the air to quote the forbidden word in the face of your newest enemy.

“I donno what to tell ya, we just lost it.”

“How do you lose an entire shipping container!?” you rub your temple.

You could just about rip your hair out.

and unbeknownst to you, your face says it all.

Reaching under the diner’s table, you push the barrel of your gun to the thick meat of his left thigh.

“I’m s-sorry ma’am, I dunno what happened, I swear!” he cowers slightly with his hands up.

“Shut up.” When you speak, he instantly zips his lips.

The diner is decorated with paper bat and pumpkin bunting and pumpkin cutouts cover the windows.

A waitress comes to your table and puts a couple things down. She’s cute, you’ll give her a decent tip. two, maybe three hundred? Your eyes follow her rump in that frilly diner dress, the bow from the apron over her front makes her waist look so perfect too. you shake your head, back to the present.

You have a milkshake in front of you, vanilla, with whip cream, a cherry, and a red and white spiral striped straw.

Your delivery boy has a plate of various american breakfast items.

Neither of you touch the food. You’re watching your carbs(stupid disgusting fucking societal standards) and he’s clearly too scared.

You pull the gun away.

“Find it.”

At home~

The trees surrounding your estate are a multitude of golds, and bright orange.

Your “husband” isn’t here, thank the gods, cause fuck, do you never want to see him.

Ever.

Especially now that you’ll have to tell him a shipment is missing somehow. You put your gun in the safe in his office. The dark wood panel closes over the safe seamlessly with a turn of a busts head back into position.

Neither of you hide anything from eachother, affairs and all laid out bare, right on the table. too bad it’s only because neither of you care about the other in the slightest.

You grunt, and your head falls to the side, landing your eyes right on your antique candy dish…

You sigh, and stand to approach it.

Taking a deep breath you take the jagged pattered crystal glass lid and set it to the side. dipping your pinky into the white powder, you’re reminded that:

Every bump you take, you say you’ll quit.

You touch your little finger to your nostril and inhale sharply.

The drip down your throat almost makes you gag, you’ve still never gotten used to it.

But your good at hiding the bad sides of things.

It hits instantly, You feel as though you can do anything, and succeed. This time you inhale freely, without any weight on your shoulders, and exhale blissfully.

Getting the house ready to receive guests is more than a breeze, sure you could do everything without it, but it’s so much more fun while on it.

*Ding Dong*

Double dipping your pinky into that candy dish, and putting the lid back on, you’re now ready to head to that looming front door and open those flood gates.

They rush in in a massive herd, handing off their coats to your doorman, and rushing to complement you on either your attire or your home.

Yes yes, you’re both lovely, don’t let it all go to your head yet reader!

Now back to business.

“Is everyone comfortable? good, good. Now,” you stand in the back of the living room, opposite the closed french doors. “How are we feeling about the last chapters of the book?” You ask.

Yes.

You host your neighborhood book club.

Of course you are an active member of society, why couldn’t you be?

Just because you have a little cocaine empire on the side?

You still have to be a good trophy wife and keep up appearances.

~

A rough hand squeezes your neck, as the man attached pounds his dick deep into you, practically piercing into your womb.

“Yes! Yes! Ye—” Your voice squeaks as he cuts it off.

“Bad girls don’t get to talk,” He slaps your ass, eliciting another squeak from your throat.

The red hot sting comes down onto your ass again and you bite your lip. Your hips are digging into the desk, it hurts so much it’s raw, but holy fuck is his dick amazing.

“P-Professor!” You manage to breathe out.

“How did they lose a SHIPPING CONTAINER! Y/N! You dumb fucking whore. They Stole it!” he seethes as he yells at you through clenched teeth, his hips slapping into your ass.

He lets go of your neck to tangle his hand into your hair and pull you back against his body, and slaps your tit, as he bites your neck.

He’s left innumerable marks across your body tonight.

Your stupid husband.

You were arranged to marry this lazy, asshole, cougar chaser of a man by your parents. It’s not like you love eachother…

But his dick game is truly top tier.

“Ahhh~!” you whine out already too dumb on his cock to speak anymore.

“That’s it, take it, like a good little cocksleeve.” His long, hard dick presses deep inside you, the way he moves his hips while it’s still inside making sure to rub every spot you like makes you melt and shudder against him.

The sweet cashmere scent of him surrounds you, as it rolls off his glistening body in waves.

His thrusts become more unstable, and he bites down harder into your shoulder. It feels as though he wants to tear you open!

His hand comes down to your burning sex, to rapidly massage you.

You cry out, “Ah! mm-mm haaah!”your body twitches as he fucks you through your orgasm. Cum mixes with cum, forming a thick ring around his cock base.

He throws your spent body down onto the bed and then leaves you in the master by yourself to catch your breath.

You push your shaking self off of the mattress, wrapping the silk duvet around your sticky body before you go.

Upon inspection in the mirror, your hair is stuck to your forehead. Uhg.

Dropping the duvet, and without evading the chill of the air, you hop into the shower with Felix.

You don’t notice his eyes roaming your body, you’re too busy trying to stay warm in the water.

He hands you your shampoo with a sly smile.

“What?” Your voice is way more annoyed than you meant it.

“Nothing,” He shrugs and nonchalantly looks up at the ceiling as if it were anything interesting.

[theloganator101]

"But the problem here is that Vivziepop is claiming to have come up with some of these ideas on her own and that by confirming that more fan theories are gonna be true in Season 2, it KINDA exposes that you’re too lazy to come up with anything on your own and would rather just take other people’s ideas instead.

And I wouldn’t even too surprised if the case is the same for Helluva Boss and she just butchered that too."

Oh that's definitely the case for sure. Look at HB S1 and then HB S2 and you'll see that they don't really mesh well at all together.

Stolas and Blitz meeting as children? Fan thing. This was fanart.

Stolas and Stella's arranged marriage? Fan thing. Look at EPs 2 and 5 carefully, does anything in those episodes imply an 'arranged marriage'? No in fact, quite the opposite really. But people just spun it in their heads because Stolas said "we weren't in-"

As if that's a conclusive statement(It wasn't), that automatically means arranged marriage(it isn't).

Did any of those episodes imply a 3rd party(King Paimon) was involved with their marriage? No, in fact...quite the opposite with Stolas' song.

People clung to stupid stereotypes and an incomplete line, while ignoring literally every other bit of context within the episodes, that seem to imply that Stolas and Stella had SOME relationship together and that it certainly wasn't an arranged/abusive one.

But no fans parroted this around as if it was some fact...same thing with Vaggie being an Ex-Exorcist....even though her having an X over her eye and wielding an Angelic spear isn't poof of anything, because the Exorcists just leave their weapons behind, she could have easily just picked it up and the X wound even being a factor is just...dumb, that could be from anything. That and this reveal was just poorly written in.

Same with Charlie n Vaggie being a couple, also a fan thing.

The show shifting to this poorly written 'romance' soap opera? Fan thing.

It makes 0 sense for either Blitz or Stolas to want eachother given how S1 played out and even how S2 is playing out. There's no chemistry between them, they've insulted one another, they've used one another....so why? There is no narrative reason for them to be together, at all.

In trying to do this, S1 was bulldozed basically by removing Stolas as an important character by getting rid of the Grimoire, so retroactively he doesn't matter to the story anymore because of the Asmodean Crystals which bring up a whole load of questions and different ways S1 could have been done WITHOUT Stolas entirely. He only matters, because now the show is trying to shift it to make him relevant with contrived/forced writing.

HB S1 and S2 just don't work together when one actually thinks about it.

... Wait I was actually kind of right about this?

THAT JUST MAKES THIS EVEN WORSE!!

Please, if ANYONE on Tumblr can link me or even reblog this with the drawing PLEASE DO! I NEED to see this for myself!

Holy fucking shit Vivziepop! You REALLY are not helping yourself here and making it obvious just how lazy and uncreative you really are!

[mdhwrites]

I'd like your thoughts on the segment of TOH fandom that attributes Luz' behavior to her having been bullied and ostracized in Gravesfield. Canonically there is nothing showing Luz being bullied or says that she was bullied in Gravesfield. Quite the contrary. Yesterday's Lie had Vee, who had been living as Luz for months, living a good life where she had made friends at camp and at school. She resented Luz' return and castigated her for not appreciating how good a life she had. The episode Thanks to Them had the guidance counselor ask Camila if she had been bullied in school to which Camila answered that she had. He then asked if she wanted Luz to struggle as she had. That question strongly suggests that Luz was not yet having any social difficulties beyond those of her own making and that sending her to camp would keep that from happening. When we see Luz back in Gravesfield HS she was having no difficulties dealing with other students and that some of her contacts with them were friendly and admiring.

So what are your thoughts on this insistence of certain fans that Luz had suffered this bullying and ostracization when the show itself not only doesn't support it but contradicts it?

Because it's necessary for Luz's character to function.

That's really all it comes down to. Luz is kind of monstrous if she has never actually known strife. She wants to be seen as the victim after all. She wants to be justified in abandoning her mom for her fantasies. For rejecting the consequences of assaulting people. Heck, that's still true in S3 where she needs to be able to claim that the human world would be some torturous hell hole for her so that her self martyring actually comes across correctly instead of someone going, "Oh, that sounds like a lot of work and might actually be dangerous so I'm just gonna stay home with my loving mom instead."

If her home life was good, was kind, was what we wish our home lives with a parent who will enable us to do whatever we want short of breaking the law... What the fuck is she doing? The audience insert, who goes entirely unquestioned in the show besides "Hey, you kind of messed up, go apologize," (which she doesn't do well all the time) is suddenly this whiny brat who wants to be enabled by literally every person in existence because she needs to be the most special person there. It's the antithesis of what people want "I just want to be understood!" to be about. She wants to be understood so you go "Oh, I get it, you keep being you," and never hold her accountable. Otherwise, she might not lie all the time because she might be willing to actually face the consequences of her actions.

It is a shift in Luz's character irreversible in its damage. You just cannot like the show in the same way when you have to admit that Luz is a self entitled little shit. And mind you, her normal archtype is of that sort. Danny Phantom and Randy Cunningham and even to some extent Kim Possible are all flawed teenage characters who are clearly growing. Who need to be better people so while they're protagonists, you're supposed to learn as much alongside them as from their example, if not more. You are meant to take from Luz by example though. She is meant to be the audience surrogate after all. And, you know, if she's unjustified in her actions... What does that say about you all of a sudden who connected so deeply with her?

That's all of why this can't vanish. I actually want to add onto your proofs though because people will go "What about her panicking during Knock Knock Knocking?" Yes, that is the ONE time we are ever given the idea for her being mocked for something and even that one... Well, she's worried about going too over the top. How much do we want to bet Luz came to school in her suit to ask the person she liked out like she was in some sort of soap opera? That's gonna get you reasonably laughed without a VERY specific sort of partner like Amity.

HOWEVER... That's the one time, a season and a half into the show, her actions imply someone who has been bullied. Otherwise, she is very confrontational, she does nothing to hide herself, she gives almost no shits about what anyone thinks about her besides "Fuck you, I am totally the greatest" everytime Eda doubts her. The closest before then is her worrying about Amity seeing her as lame but Amity is the only one she cares about for that. Even then, she never seems bothered by the fact that Amity is a bully. She is willing to stand up to her regardless. This is further reinforced by what she does with Boscha where she either just brushes her off during Once Upon a Swap or is entirely confident in confronting her in Winging it Like Witches. NONE of that is the behavior of someone who has been bullied, harassed and hurt by constant bullying. Add all the elements where she clearly could have found people like her but chose instead to chase more popular clubs like cheerleading and acting and it paints a REALLY bad picture of Luz.

It paints her as Liz Lemon from 30 Rock, or Goob from Meet the Robinsons. Both people who claimed the world hated them when the reality was that they were awful to reality, one being a bully and the other ignoring all signs of kindness and acceptance that was attempted to be given to him. This is far worse when you remember that Luz never appreciated her mom properly, like Goob, and also is genuinely an asshole to both King and Hooty for their interests, like Liz Lemon.

Luz is a bad person. But for the show to function, you cannot believe that. Once you do, it will only to start to collapse faster and faster as the contradictions pile on top of themselves.

So why not just twist the truth instead into the pleasant lie Luz is actually the archtype of the bullied nerd that the first episode tried to imply she was but then failed to ever deliver on? It's easier that way, even if it's dishonest. Luz wouldn't judge you for it, not so long as you didn't try to lie to her. Because all that matters in the end to Luz is Luz.

======+++++======

If the idea of a fact that's not well supported by the show being critical to a character functioning sounds familiar, it's because it's the same reason why people need Odalia to be pure evil. Both Amity and Luz need to use having been hurt by others to justify their own behaviors, even when their behaviors don't correlate in ways that actually support those excuses.

I have a public Discord for any and all who want to join!

I also have an Amazon page for all of my original works in various forms of character focused romances from cute, teenage romance to erotica series of my past. I have an Ao3 for my fanfiction projects as well if that catches your fancy instead. If you want to hang out with me, I stream from time to time and love to chat with chat.

A Twitter you can follow too

And a Kofi if you like what I do and want to help out with the fact that disability doesn’t pay much.

[mikuni14]

Jack & Joker - Ep 7

This episode was extremely hard for me to watch, because it's like someone took the tropes I hate the most and decided to put them here one by one. Lack of communication, misunderstanding, saying something horrible about a loved one when don't mean it and they hear it, a love triangle, a love triangle with a girl in a BL series, noble sacrifice, noble, stupid and unnecessary sacrifice, being mean for a "noble" purpose to protect a loved one by rejecting them, heartbreaking fights, jealousy, the pain of rejection, suffering alone. I hate every single one of these things and a series that I like so, so much decided to throw them all into one episode, at once. So it's easy to imagine that I'm not having a good time 💀

So many bad things happened in this episode that I started crying at the end, it was just too much. What really depressed me was that many of these things were unnecessarily bad, and there was a kind of malice in them that was hard to watch on screen.

I had some understanding (not excuse - understanding) for Save in the last episode, but then I didn't know all the facts. Now I have only contempt for him, because he is simply stupid and cruel in what he does. Save didn't even arrange something specific for Hope, or even for himself, which is exceptionally stupid, since he literally sold his soul to the devil - as it turns out, for nothing. On top of that, he didn't have to include Joke in his schemes, my jaw just dropped when after everything he did to Jack and his grandma, he himself, without being asked, says to Boss that there is one more dude who can mess with your plans, like bitch fr? Save dangerously plays god, messing with people's lives (in grandma's case - her LITERAL life) and for whom, for his boyfriend who works for the mafia and openly says that he actually likes doing it and unlike Jack - is a real loan shark who beats people (his behavior radicalized Tattoo). Hope was beaten, which is a risk of the profession he does, he wasn't beaten up randomly on the street for money, or bullied at a regular job., ffs! But what Save will never earn my forgiveness for is that for the sake of unclear privileges for his boyfriend 1) he could've killed an innocent person 2) he destroys the lives - and I want to emphasize this - LITERALLY DESTROYS THE LIVES of 3 innocent people. And not that I like Rose, but it also affects her life. Thus, grandma, Jack, Joke and Rose are just pawns, a colateral damage in his plans, for his own personal gain.

SAVE IS LIKE TEE FROM DFF. Sorry, but just as I had no sympathy for those guys, I have no sympathy for Save. He doesn't have to do this, he doesn't have to do such cruel and plainly evil things, he doesn't have to be so zealous, such an "employee of the month doing 200% of the norm" lol. It's very interesting that Save, instead of persuading Hope to leave this job and even run away, since he's oh so worried about him, directs his efforts to protect him, by harming others - others who are in the same or worse situation as he is.

..........

This whole marriage plot is so silly and soap opera and that's how I decided to treat it, so that I could still like this show 😅. Gods, it's just so stupid and when Jack initially didn't agree, I was so happy that finally, a voice of reason, and yet.. I don't know how Boss and Jack imagine doing this? I mean technically and.. just… generally???? How Jack plans to marry a woman he doesn't care about (with potential sex? children????) and at the same time follow Boss's orders, while being, you know, himself??? Not to mention that there is a whole ass person in this puzzle: Rose? And I'm not even mentioning Grandma, who is not stupid - how will she feel knowing that Jack literally sold himself for her health? From Jack's words in this episode, I gather that he is more or less aware of Joke's feelings. And I'm a little upset about the fact that Jack hurts him so much, knowing this. And his "noble motives" do not excuse him, because Jack leaves scorched earth behind him, destroys people around him and HIMSELF. And it will get even worse, because there will be no way out of this situation, in which he is digging himself deeper and deeper, which is what Joke was trying to tell him. Jack does something I particularly hate: he "sacrifices himself nobly" but he is really selfish in this sacrifice, because he doesn't ask if anyone actually wants his sacrifice it's The Sign all over again, fuck. And the fact that he does all this alone, officially, to protect his loved ones, shows that he really doesn't trust those close to him, that they can either help him, or that they could decide for themselves. And although I don't like Rose, Jack is ready to marry her without love, for his benefits, which is... suddenly not so noble, right Jack?

I know that all this is the law of slightly exaggerated TV romances, because if Jack had trusted Joke and his grandma and talked to them, maybe together they would have figured out another way to get money for her treatment, but then again, there wouldn't have been all this drama 🙄

But Jack didn't even try.

And he's really getting to the point where even if he wanted to stop, he wouldn't be able to, and even if he somehow managed to, there would be nothing to save, because everyone would be too hurt by him to forgive him. And he's so blinded by fear and the belief that he's doing the right thing that he doesn't even see it.

The approach of Save, Jack and Joke to situations when they feel they have no choice is very interesting. Save sacrifices others without hesitation, Jack sacrifices himself (consciously) and others (unconsciously), Joke sacrifices himself. Joke is truly selfless in all of this, because he is able to humiliate himself in front of his father for someone he cares about, work for pennies, but legally, as Jack wants, when things are very bad, he still feels duty towards the grandma - a person, who was kind to him. Whatever he does, he's alone in it, he doesn't involve others, any harm falls only on him. Apart from that, he blames himself for everything...

...........

Despite everything that the series has shown in tis ep, and which I actively hate, I cannot but praise the series for a few things:

the actors gave it their all in this episode, especially in the micro-expressions on the faces of Jack, Joke and Save, when you can see that they are trying to hide what they are going through

as always, I have to praise the incredibly accurate socio-political-economic background of the series. That there is always a bigger shark in the pool, the total detachment from reality of the rich and that they do NOT WANT to know this reality and that they don't really care. How easily the poor fall into a spiral of debt, a system of dependency, passivity caused by constantly hitting a wall and helplessness in the face of constant adversity (how Jack did not even consider other methods of obtaining money, but went straight to Boss)

that in reality it's so easy to manipulate the poor, who ultimately harm themselves and each other, which is exploited by the elites. The elites know that it's enough to set people against each other and they will jump at each other's throats, doing all the dirty work for them, while they feast on exquisite dishes in beautiful interiors, in expensive clothes. Tattoo, Save, even Jack, do what is expected of them on their own, and their actions negatively affect… themselves and people like them. This is a very brutal and gloomy conclusion to this series, unfortunately also very realistic. Because the rich, the elites know that a divided, depressed society that lives in fear is easier to manipulata and control. Becasue if Jack, Joke, Tattoo, Hoy, Save and Hope joined forces, they would probably be able to oppose Boss, to come up with something for themselves. And so from the beginning we see how their various selfish actions throw themselves and others like them under the bus. Because really, as sad and awful as it may sound, neither Boss nor even Rose could have done anything if not for the significant "help" from Tattoo and Save

the unexpected, but weirdly compelling het ship 😆

Finally, the most beautiful scene. I really appreciate the choice of shots in this scene, especially when only the hands are framed and the focus is on them, without showing the face… 💖

Why can't they be like this all the time 🥺

[niobiumao3]

So like...

I really did NOT like Phee being absent for the Pabu invasion, that felt so fucking not great :( And so much of these episodes was SO GOOD.

Cross and Omega's argument! Pheeeeee my beloved!! Wrecker saving Gonky (called it on he saw the charges, grabbed Gonky and RAN).

But here's the thing, the Tech Tells on CX-2 are VERY strong at this point, except, we have 4 entire episodes in which to reveal how he became a Clone X when Crosshair didn't while ALSO not apparently remembering anything (Soap Opera Amnesia from the fall? Conditioning so bad his brain broke? did he make himself forget??) and then to reveal him AND fix this.

I don't see how that is getting done in 4 episodes in any GOOD way, one of which at a minimum involves the Juggernaut heist. In my estimation that's not enough narrative space to do this except Super Mario speedrun memory hacks with frame placement style stuff ala the power of Omega's love and like, that is simply not a compelling plot to me. Maybe they can pull it off, I dunno. It worked with Cross because it was spread over 5 months of in-story time, and we SAW the development in an entire episode dedicated to that. Are we getting that here? I just doubt that.

At least a couple casual viewers have commented it doesn't seem likely CX-2 is Tech now because, yeah, 4 episodes left and how does he not know anything? Amnesia so he forgets and has to remember? This is a classically disLIKED plot point from soap operas. So from a not-obsessively-examining-the-man's-every-motion POV it seems less likely, not more, due to the season rollout and current status heading into the back third.

From my POV, I feel like the tells are SO heavy. Placements on Pabu, 'domiciles', etc. But the show's writing is so very Occam's Razor that I don't see how Clone X Tech behaving like this makes literally ANY sense aside from a narrative which is a pale echo of Crosshair's merged onto an amnesia plot and and then cut brutally short.

The reviewer reactions DEFINITELY sounded like we get a Tech reveal somewhere in 10-14, for sure. Just, not clear on what kind.

But man I don't want Shifty Thrifting Crosshair Arc: Tech Version. Just. Do Not Want. Here's hoping they have found some way to do it well/right, if that's indeed where this goes.

My personal prefs are:

Tech is actually IN one of those CX conditioning pods, refusing to submit, clinging to his sanity

Tech is the partial-success m-count transfer subject and was such a problem Hemlock put him in isolation, having realized he made a huge mistake in giving this man even a LITTLE additional Force sensitivity

Tech will pop up out of the ground ala Gandalf in 12-14.

[nightcolorz]

on one hand one of my favorite things about Armand’s character in the books is that he is a fundamentally different kind of unreliable narrator then guys like Louis and lestat bcus he isn’t capable of overtly lying in his narration to make himself look better. he has sm trouble with memory and with conceptualizing and understanding his own life in a chronological manner that when he tells his story he is more focused on trying to understand it himself then attempting to portray himself well for an audience. He’s more like amc Louis in that respect, while book Louis does the lying to make himself look better thing very overtly💀

so I am very disappointed that amc iwtv seems to be taking the “Armand tells a unreliable probably fake version of his past with lestat that makes himself look better” direction bcus it takes away from one of the things about Armand that is most interesting. Of course I prefer this over the alternative of “Armand was telling the unbiased truth” bcus that would be a horribly botched rendition of literally my favorite thing in the entire series (Armand and lestats past in tvl) that nulls everything about it that makes it interesting and turns it into a soap opera esc dramatized bullshitty shock value alternative that I hate. On the other hand I thought the tvl section of the episode was SO FUCKING FUNNY AND ENTERTAINING and I was crying laughing for 20 straight minutes so like well done amc who am I to complain I like it when the gay vampires have crazy insane messy gay sex

[llamagoddessofficial]

A lovely commission from @vallleyoflilllies, Error being a silly tsundere and not knowing how to deal with his crush on a human <3 absolutely CLASS idea

---

He was back again.

You could always tell when he was back- you’d come home from work and hear the sounds of a random dramatic soap opera drifting from the TV. He liked those... he would binge-watch entire series’ in one sitting. 

... You shook some of the droplets off your coat, then hung it up to let it drip-dry for a bit. The weather was pretty grim outside. You headed to your room first, changing into pyjamas and picking up your project... you didn’t have any other outings planned today. Sitting with him on the couch sounded really nice.

You made your way to the sofa, flopping down beside him unceremoniously. He didn’t look at you. He wasn’t watching a soap opera today, though- he was watching some cooking show you’d never seen before, based in Italy.

“This is new.” You commented. “Why’re you watching an old people cooking show? You never cook. All you do is eat my food.”

“i put-t-t it on for you, actually. since your cook-k-king is gross.” He said, still not looking at you. You knew him well enough to know his words had no real venom to them. “take notes, glitch.”

You snickered. “Doesn’t stop you from coming back. Weirdo.”

You liked when he was here. 

Error... he had a habit of appearing out of nowhere. Literally- he’d appear out of thin air. Disappearing for days, then showing up again, acting like no time passed. Your first encounter with him had been him shaking you awake in the middle of the night; he was visibly upset and berated you for leaving your stove on by accident, informing you you could’ve had a fire if he wasn’t there to turn it off. You were so tired, and so perplexed by what was occurring, that you just sheepishly apologised- convinced you were dreaming. Apparently somewhat mollified by your apology, he proceeded to... vanish like a mirage.

...

Well. You obviously wrote that off as the strangest episode of sleep hallucination you’d ever had.

The next occurrence was when you left a cupboard door open, and almost stood up into the opened door. You would’ve whacked your head pretty hard. But a firm, large hand on your head stopped you from standing up fully- you heard the sound of a closing cupboard and a glitched “st-t-upid human, you’re going to hurt yoursel-l-lf.”. You were absolutely shocked to look up and see that the monster from your ‘dream’ the other night was real, and glaring down at you.

... He then disappeared. Again. Like he wasn’t even there. You didn’t have time to process it.

It happened with further and further frequency, and for lesser and lesser reasons. At first, it was things of genuine concern, he would make sure you weren’t leaving your oven on, he’d replace the battery in your carbon monoxide alarm. Then stuff of slightly less importance... shutting off a tap you left running. Plugging in your phone overnight when you’d forgotten. And it wasn’t long before it was stuff of absolutely zero concern- turning off the TV when you weren’t in the room, tidying up your shoes when you left them at an askew angle by the door, washing up plates you’d abandoned on the counter. 

Oddly, it felt like in certain ways, he had completely slipped under your radar. Of course you were concerned that a large glitching skeleton monster somehow possessed the ability to instantly get in and out of your home. Of course you were worried about your privacy, your safety, his intentions. He would sometimes look at you for several seconds, unbroken, yellow eyelights blank despite your nervous queries- other times, he would say confusing jittering things to you or himself, about ‘universes’ and ‘alternates’. ‘Mistakes’ he had to ‘eradicate’.

... But... also...

... You weren’t worried at all.

Error was funny. Both intentionally, and unintentionally. He tried to act all tough, speaking with barbs and calling you a ‘glitch’- but to you, he was so clearly all bark and no bite. You shot right back, calling him a broken record player and a weird homeless guy... he took it in stride. He obviously delighted in having someone to play off. To banter with.

... He clearly liked you. He kept coming back, again and again. And you’d be lying if you said you didn’t like him too.

Did you still have questions? Sure. But in the end, it wasn’t really worth driving yourself crazy over stuff like his secret backstory. He could obviously go in and out of your home completely at will, he could rob you blind or murder you if he so pleased. All he did was do a few menial chores, and occasionally eat some of your food.

He clearly just... needed someone.

At this point in your... ‘relationship’... Error seemed to have given up on the excuse of doing chores in order to be in your home. He still did them, sure, but sometimes he’d just stay anyway. Once he seemed to clock that you tolerated him, whether or not he was unexpectedly picking up your dry cleaning, he began sticking around all day. He would hover nearby you, drifting in and out of whatever room you were in, watching you like a curious cat. If you acknowledged his existence in any manner, like with a question about his day, he’d visibly brighten and start chattering. He’d sit on the couch with you. Listen while you rambled about work, family, friends, anything... making snide remarks and staring with those bright yellow eyelights.

He was more akin to a helpful, close friend/roommate than anything else. You’d grown to kinda just accept that Error was part of your life now.

... He was very easy to accept.

///---///

Error let a slow breath escape him. His temper had been, only moments earlier, absolutely foul. Foul enough that the multiverse would’ve done well to fear him.

... You had no idea that before you arrived, he’d been seething on your couch, glitches overtaking his vision- literally blinding him with anger. Twitching, burning, infuriated by his difficulty with simple tasks while angry. It had been an awful few days, so awful not even the TV could distract him.

... Then he’d heard your front door open. He heard you sigh to yourself, shake off your raincoat, kick off your shoes.

... His vision had cleared. His Soul had thumped. Finally- the only thing that could distract him.

Your home was the only place where he felt warm. It felt like the only place he could come back to, that welcomed him, with familiar smells and sounds and trinkets that brought him back to reality. Even better when you were physically in the space with him, like you were now, nestled beside him on the couch. Unlike the anti void, a vast expanse of white nothingness where he had only himself to talk to, he liked how your home was full of things that had meaning to you. Your Soul’s energy had soaked into every item in the home- as had your scent.

... He glanced at you, then back to the TV again. Did you know you were the only creature in the multiverse he wanted closer?

(He had one of your shirts, in the anti void. You didn’t know. He figured he probably should return it soon... but it kept him company, when he couldn’t directly be with you.)

It was odd. You calling him a weirdo had made him feel so calm- affirmation that you still didn’t know what he’d done, that you still liked him. Still wanted him in your home. He sometimes asked himself what he, the destroyer of universes, was doing hanging around in a tiny backwater AU with a nobody human... but like most things in his life, he found that if he asked too many questions, the pain in his head became too intense. 

At the end of the day, you being close to him and talking to him made him feel good. That was all he needed to know.

Even just watching you had calmed him down; back before he realised you were happy to let him in.

You had settled in, your breathing was slower. Someone, relaxed around him... it felt good. Though he desperately wanted to stare at you, and talk to you, he also didn’t want to seem clingy. He tried to act like he didn’t care, pretending he was watching the Italian cooking show.

...

He didn’t manage long.

“there are aus with m-m-much better looking-g-g mediterraneans than that.” He said, yellow mouth pulled into a sneer.

... You gave him a customary ‘mhm’. 

You had no clue what an AU was. But you humoured him; he liked that. You didn’t really know what most of the things he talked about were, you’d just give him some nods and hums, maybe you’d tease him. You probably just thought he was nuts.

He finally glanced over at you. You were leaning on the side of the couch... something in hand.

...

He felt his Soul skip.

“a-a-are you crocheting?”

... 

... You looked up at him, you seemed surprised to hear him comment on what you were doing. Your eyes on him made his magic all but purr. He was looking at your ‘project’- a few terrible tangled messes, a ball of brown yarn, and a crochet hook pinched between your thumb and forefinger.

(You were in pyjamas. He liked when you were in pyjamas... he liked when you were comfortable. Comfortable around him.)

“... Oh. Uh... well, I’m trying to crochet.” Your voice soothed his glitches. Everything about you was a balm to his angry, spiteful, troubled Soul. “I’ve only just started. I can’t really work it out.”

He tilted his skull. “what are you-u maki-i-ing?”

Were your cheeks getting pinker? “... Nothing in particular, maybe a scarf? I just wanted to get into crocheting.”

He stared. “what don’t y-y-you understand?”

“Making the knot at the beginning. I dunno where to put everything.” Your brow furrowed. “You know how to crochet?”

“of course.” He said, sitting up. The TV was now purely background noise. “why do you seem surp-p-prised?”

You gave him a look, and a teasing smile that made him feel fidgety and hot. 

“... You’re so right. How could I have been so blind. You scream ‘guy who likes to crochet’.”

Error shifted. “how can you not know how to make a slipknot? they’re easy. there’s a lot of method-d-ds.”

“There are? Course you'd know, grandma.”

“maybe try a pret-t-zel method.” He pointed to your yarn, sitting forward even further. “make a pretzel sh-shape with the yarn. then catch the inside loop.”

You made a loop over your finger.

... Then kinda just paused, unsure.

“n-n-no, a pretzel.” He narrowed his sockets. “don’t you kn-kn-know how to make a p-p-pretzel?”

“No.” You said, honestly. Then you glared at him. “But also, you’re shit at explaining.”

He loved when you sassed him. He leaned in. “maybe the cross method is easier for your t-t-tiny human brain. loop the thread twice ov-v-ver your fingers so it’s an x shape. then tuck the loose end under the x and catch that. eas-s-sy.”

... You looped the yarn over your finger twice.

...

“But like. Where do I tuck the end of it?” You said.

“under the x. you... ugh.” He grunted. “c’mere. gimme the-the-the end of the thread.”

...

You flushed. But you shuffled, sitting up, passing him the yarn.

Error leant over- he took your hands in his.

...

He took your hands. In his.

He froze, for a split second. Your hands were in his. He stared down at them; tiny, soft, warm, shrouded in his blackened bones. He had expected contact with you to feel like lightning, but it didn't, your hands were just... nice. Everything he’d dreamed of. 

... 'fuck' was the only thought running through his head. Repeating over and over. He didn’t mean to take your hands, he didn't realise what he was doing until he’d already done it- he was just so accustomed to instinctively hating the idea of touching anyone, he had no idea how to stop himself from doing it when the urge overcame him. He was just so comfortable with you, so warm- he hadn’t thought twice. In that moment, the thought to recoil from you hadn’t even occurred to him.  

He hadn’t thought twice about touching you. 

... It wasn’t until this very moment, your hands warming his bones, that he realised he was indulging an urge he’d had since the moment he first saw you.

...

Error couldn’t allow himself to acknowledge how deeply he’d been taken off guard. And equally, he couldn’t allow you to see it. So he forced himself to continue.

He didn’t want to let go of your hands.

“it-t-t’s a basic slipknot. i don’t get where you’re conf-fused.” He said, defaulting to insults, as he did when he felt any kind of gentle emotion. He hoped his glitches would hide the nervous stutter.

He moved your fingers in his claws, precisely, holding up the end of the yarn. Your hands felt tiny in his.

“do it lik-k-ke this. you want the end to be about this long. not too sh-short.” With the eye of someone who had done it a thousand times, he looped it over your first two fingers. “make an x, over your fingers, like that-t. you see? then you tuck the tail under here. but not-t-t all the way through.”

... 

... His eyelights moved from the thread, to your face. He caught you looking at him. He was very close, his mouth only a few inches from your face. Close enough to literally feel the warmth coming off you. 

... Just like that, he found it was difficult to swallow. 

You flinched, seemingly flustered at getting caught staring- you forced yourself to look back down at the crochet hooks. You bit your lip, apparently in embarrassment.

Your mouth.

...

It took him a few long, difficult moments to draw his eyelights away from your soft, soft lips. 

“... pinch the tail so you dont lose it.” His claws continuously brushed yours as he circled the thread over your own fingers. He took your left hand. “put your other finger through the loop. like... that. then slide the hook through and catch it. there you go, a slipknot.”

... He could hear your heartbeat. It was faster.

“make sure not to tighten it too much. the knot doesn’t count as a stitch. if you were knitting, it would count. but it doesn’t count in cr-crocheting.”

...

He felt like he’d reached the end of his list of excuses to keep holding your hands.

... He let go. And... he sat back against the couch, refusing to look at you, worried about what he might do if he did. He could feel the energy in his cheekbones, they were probably bright blue. 

His hands balled in his lap.

...

“Thanks.” You said, gently. Genuinely.

...

Error didn’t know how to process what he was currently feeling. He wasn't sure if he'd ever know how. So he just kept his sockets glued to the TV.

“... s-s-sure." He said. "whatever.”