#thinking ‘oh so he really is just that fucking stupid’ with every lore drop

[dracoj]

glass onion demonstrates how great satire often seems prophetic since it draws on what’s plain to see in the present. fake-elon Miles Bron waters a crowd of sycophants to do his bidding, throws money around until smarter people turn his idiotic ideas into something workable; worse-elon bought twitter in what looked like a childish fit of pique, grand proclamations to finally rid the platform of bots and meanies*. but that can’t be what’s going on right? theres gotta be something we’re not seeing, no one would make such nonsensical, expensive, dangerous decisions just for notoriety. there’s gotta be some master plan. but no, glass onion says (way back in 2021!), the center is clear. to see it, you just need to accept that he really is that fucking stupid.

[ghostsarepeopletoo-2]

My Live DRDT episode 16 reaction

HERE WE GO CHATT

SPOILERS UNDER THE CUT

“Are we all ready to vote?” It’s so Aceover

how much you wanna bet David voted for Teruko

“Congratulations!” ITS ACEOVER 😭

“I’m proud of us-!” Can he stfu already

“What do you have to say in your defense?” Can SHE stfu already I’m sorry Hu fans but at this point she makes me want to punch the wall

“I killed her. And if you never forgive me for that, then there’s nothing I can say.” THE NICO PARALLELS?!?!! THE FOILS OF ALL TIME

“This… This all could have been prevented, couldn’t it?” YES THANK YOU EDEN

of course Eden would be the one to point that out first…

“It’s just… misfortune.” Yeah you would know a thing or two about that wouldn’t you

I actually see this line as Teruko refusing to accept either blame or the idea that she could turn out like Ace

“So we can’t possibly blame ourselves…” Hu. HU.

This time I KNOW she’s refusing to accept blame. It’s become a theme in her character, that she refuses to take criticism or herself or those she cares about. It’s a very interesting character trait and I really love her as a character but oh my GOD does she make me mad-

I guess I should specify that while it’s technically everyone’s fault that Ace committed the murder, it’s Ace’s fault most of all for making himself so unapproachable in the first place. I’m not gonna ignore that just because he’s my fav, I’m not gonna do the same thing I literally just criticized Hu for. However, it was Nico’s botched murder attempt that led to Ace finalizing his murder plan, and Hu’s blind defense of Nico didn’t help matters. Out of everyone she might be one of the people who made him want to kill the most.

“… He was happier, and he trusted people more.” “Like adding stones one a pane of glass… until eventually, the glass cracks.” Okay nvm you guys really did ruin him didn’t you

“Nico’s attempted murder isn’t a cause, it’s just a symptom…” Maybe I was wrong okay I’m sorry Hu

“Whatever. Whatever!” Uh oh

“Did you all get the Veronika virus or what?” “You all are wrong, so shut up!” I was gonna say, it’s pretty rude to talk about him like he’s not there 😭

“I didn’t want to die. That’s all.” My boy… my boy you are cooked

“Don’t think that I forgot about your secret, you damn murderer!” Man I was so sad about everything else I almost forgot about Acevi. Almost.

“It’s really funny in hindsight how you acted all betrayed when you found out Levi was a murderer, as if you were unaware that you yourself had killed someone.” I fucking hate him but fair.

I’m not gonna quote anything else David says unless it’s important because I hate him with a burning passion

“But still, I-! I don’t care what it was! I don’t care if it made me a hypocrite!” Acevi is gonna kill me dead just fyi

“I just needed a reason to stay mad at you…!” This yaoi is so doomed I’m gonna kms/j

“I can’t understand you, no matter how hard I try.”

“I need you to do a favor for me right now. It might just save your life.” Huh???? Wha??? Teruko what’re you cooking

is she gonna ask Ace to dropkick Monotv omg

“The whole reason this killing game keeps going on is because we’re all forced to follow MonoTV’s rules.” HOLY SHIT SHE IS

I wanna see a cg of Ace vs. Monotv so bad ngl

“Yeah, more murder! Wait, what??” I love this stupid cat. Rip Monotv you will be missed

“I can’t…do it.” What is wrong with him/genuine concern

“I don’t wanna die. I can’t do that-” my brother in Christ you are cooked anyway. Go out in a blaze of glory

OH MY GOD A WHOLE ENTIRE FUCKING ANIMATION!?!?!! AND HE GOT MONOTV, ITS MONOVER

I FUCKING KNEW THAT WOULDN’T WORK THERE’S NO WAY- wait did that say XF-TURE?!?!?!!

XF-TURE IS BEHIND THIS, OR AT LEAST CREATED MONOTV

Help ain’t no way Ace’s about to get cooked by a default personality 😭

“Sorry, Ace.” Help 😭

“To run this killing game until the death of every participant.” WHAT

okay lore drops this episode: XF is behind, or at the very least heavily involved in, the game. The game is designed to run until every participant is dead, implying that the mastermind wants every participant dead- possibly including themself. If that’s true it puts major points for people such as Hu, David, or maybe Whit to be the mastermind as they have been shown to have suicidal ideation. (Whit not so much but I can assume)

“I will pass the punishment for breaking the rules to the one who made that decision.” ITS TEROVER. wait but she’s the ultimate lucky so she’s probably gonna survive

imagine it becomes a running “joke” that Teruko has a near death experience in every chapter lol

ITS TEROVER- does she not gaf 😭 maybe Teruko could be up there with our suicidal peeps

she really doesn’t gaf 😭

this is so wild she doesn’t care bc she’s lucky and her life sucks and-

“I was perfectly willing to get shot.” Was???

ITS LEVIOVER NOOOOOOOO

MY POSITIVE ASPD REP 😭

ACEVI BOTH DOWN IN ONE CHAPTER WE ARE SO COOKED

“LEVI!!” Oh so you do care. Okay. Okay. A single tear rolls down my cheek

oh yeah I forgot about Charles’s whole thing. Thanks for being a good bf Whit

“His injuries are not fatal.” PRAISE THE LORD HALLELUJAH

YOU CAN’T TAKE HIM TO THE INFIRMARY YOU HAVE TO WATCH ACE GET COOKED- wait YO IS THAT A SAD WHIT SPRITE??? Isn’t that one of the harbingers of the apocalypse or smthn

Ace is gonna die not knowing if Levi survived… oghgh

Ace speeding up his own death to save Levi 😭 I’m gonna 😭

“Stop saying you can’t do it, because you can!” Maybe with the power of belief, anything is possible

Ace is gonna die and Arturo’s gonna be like “yeah Levi’s dead” like immediately

ARTURO HAVING A MOMENT THATS NOT ABOUT HIM SUCKING HELL YEAH

not Ace calling him a coward 😭 stones in glass houses looking ass

here we go boys/gn… it’s Aceover

HES COOOKED

NOT A THANATOPHOBIA THEMED EXECUTION I QUIIIIT

the last ones gonna be death by horses just watch

DID HE DIE OF FEAR???? IM KILLING MYSELF

THERES NO FUCKING WAY THAT HORSES WEREN’T EVEN MENTIONED

Teruko what’s your deal

“I’m a hypocrite” chewing on her. Grrr grrr

“I have no choice…” there is no way drdt is out here trying to give depth to the MONOKUMA equivalent, of all things. I’m out

she blames herself… honey no…

the. the ending. I’m killing myself I quit I can’t-

ace has hand trauma too??? You know what sure at this point

you don’t get any final thoughts bc I’m tired. Have a nice day

[delusionalbitchinthehouse]

Special angst. Featuring touch-starved Special, homemade quintessence fuckery and lore, basically Special can't touch anyone or they die, Omega and Delta try to help.

CW : Angst, like pretty heavy angst I think, Hurt/comfort, talk of death

Ghouls are social creatures. Not all to the same extend, not all in the same way, but the fact remains : ghouls thrive in eachother's company, in the knowledge that someone, somewhere, is waiting for them, ready to welcome them.

And, ghouls are physically affectionate, as a result of this need to be close and feel surrounded by loved ones. Of course, it's a generic rule, and it doesn't applie the same way to each individuals, but, most of the time, ghouls live off of casual touch, hand holding, hugs, cuddles, clasps on the shoulders, arms slung around waists, tails intertwining.

It's Satan's best joke, really, that Special can't even have that.

That he's so fucked up that not only no one bears to be in his presence, but he could also kill the poor ghoul who'd pity him enough to try and give him a hug.

Because Special's elements are all pulling him in different direction, trying to evade the too tight confine of his body, weak fire sorrowfuly begging to be smothered out, destructive quintessence furiously grasping at every bits of vital energy it can find, literaly sucking the life out of anyone stupid enough to have any kind of skin-to-skin contact with Special.

At least it's vaguely less awfull now that he managed to contain the devastating effect of his quintessence to his body - the screams of agony of the people who tried to approach him after his summoning, Omega's pained grunts as he backed away, the soft blanket he had held out for Special falling at his feet, the sheer terror on the ancient ghoul's face as he watched the humans unfortunate enough to be in Special's quintessence's range dropping like fly, oh, Special remembers it all so well.

Six Siblings died that way, simply because they were standing too close to him. Omega was, too, and is only alive because of his highly resistant nature, allowing him to stumble back in time.

It took weeks of sitting across from Omega, safe distance between them, training relentlessly to try and tame his quintessence, before Special could evolve around people without draining them. But it worked.

Provided he stays dressed head to toe, not a silver of skin showing, of course.

Special could, theoretically, be on the recieving end of ghoul's typical affection, the soft nudges, pats and caresses rythming their lives, long as no one makes contact with his skin, long as all those displays take place through a layer of clothing.

But then again, Special can't blame them for being wary, and prefering to stay away altogether. They're right, after all. You never know what might happen, if Special won't suddenly lose control and kill everyone in a three meters radius just by existing.

Special hasn't see anyone in days. Omega said he'd come by, but he hasn't yet. Special vaguely remembers something about Delta the...water ghoul, right ? Well, one of them anyway. There's a lot of those around, Special keeps forgetting who's who, doesn't see them enough to properly remember. He sticks to the dark corners, only goes out in the dead of the night, only watches the other ghouls from afar, except maybe for Omega.

But Omega's not here, hasn't been here for too long, busy taking care of Delta, whatever that means. Special wonders if he'll come back. Special wonders why he needs Omega to come to his room, why he can't bring himself to get up and go find the quint by himself. It's not like it's forbidden or anything. He just can't do it, the thought of opening his bedroom door in the middle of the day strictly unfathomable.

No, Special, at least during the day, needs someone to open it, someone to drag him outside if he really is needed, like for interviews, because apparently he's the only fucker who agreed to do them when neither Papa nor Omega are free.

A third choice, that would probably be even further down the list of candidates if it wasn't for his uncanny ability to entertain humans, with jokes and crudes, snarky remarks masking the cracks of his shattered soul.

So Special waits, sitting motionless in the middle of his bed. He hasn't seen anyone in days. He hasn't been touched since forever. No, that's not true. Omega cupped the back of his head the last time he was here, protected by the mask and balaclava Special always has to wears, and pressed a kiss to the metal covering his forehead.

It had nearly unraveld him.

Special doesn't know why Omega still bothers with him, what sick sense of responsability pushes the quint to visit Special as often as he can bear, why he insist on being so patient, so gentle, smiling with sadness in his eyes.

Special doesn't want pity. But he could never tell Omega not to come back.

His hair is getting too long. It's itchy in the back of his neck, keeps getting stuck in folds of fabric. Special shifts uncomfortably, thinking about stealing a pair of scissors and chopping it off himself. It's always a delicate task, cutting his hair : he's not good at it himself, but whenever Omega's doing it, he has to be extra cautious, avoiding any contact with Special's scalp, not even able to properly run his fingers through it. Special's hair is never perfect, always a bit messy, as a result, but now it's even worse.

He really needs Omega to come back.

It hits Special like a freight train.

He needs Omega to come back. He needs to hear his voice, to see the lines and creases on his face, the tired slope of his broad shoulders, the softness of his eyes. Special needs his tentative, fleeting touches, needs to talk to him, needs to be carefully held, even if it's all tainted with Omega's guilt, obligation and pity.

He needs to know Omega hasn't moved on, hasn't chalked him up as a lost cause, that Special hasn't lost the only comfort life ever granted him.

A knock startles him out of his thoughts, his whole being shaking with relief at the familiar pattern.

"Spesh ? Can I come in ?"

Special nearly sobs. His voice scratches in his throat.

"Yes."

Omega slips in the room. He's maskless, and Special drinks him in like a ghoul starved. He looks tired, like he hasn't slept in days, but. He's smiling. Omega is smiling, wide an bright, eyes gleaming. It makes Special's own lips pull in an unfamiliar direction, up up up, until concealed under the mask, his mouth weakly mimics Omega's.

"I have good news for you, Spesh. Really good news. Would you let me bring someone else in here ?"

Special visibly flinches, though still half frozen, cossed-legged on the bed. Omega's face softens in that way Special yearns for.

"It's okay, it'll be fine. I promise. Do you trust me ?"

Special doesn't need to think about the answer, nodding with more conviction than he ever displayed before. It gets a soft chuff out of Omega.

"Attaboy."

The quint moves with a grace Special envies, reaching for the door and opening it like it's the easiest thing in the world. Maybe, to him, it is.

The ghoul that steps in looks just as tired as Omega, if not more, but is also sporting a smile, hair an absolute mess, looking like it got chopped with absolutely no regard for the aesthetical result, as uneven as it is unruly.

"Spesh, this is Delta, remember ? Delta, this is Special."

Special blinks, unmoving as a statue, as he often is. Sometimes, he thinks that if he keeps perfectly still, the universe will forget that he is supposed to be, and simply let him stop existing.

Delta. Yes Special remembers. He doesn't smell like most water ghouls, though, it's quite disarming.

"Hello, Special," Delta breathes, barely above a whisper, "it's nice to officially meet you."

Unsure of what to do with that soft tone, with how genuine Delta apparently is, Special looks toward Omega, silently begging for guidance. The quint goes to sit next to him, one hand brushing his back ever so slightly. Special has to bite his tongue to contain a relieved whimper.

"He's here because we discovered something, and I have a theory," Omega explains.

Delta is standing straight, hands folded behind his back, withstanding Special's wary scrunity with an easy smile. Something about him is...off, Special notes. It's not necessarily bad, but it intrigues him.

Delta looks like a water ghoul. Blueish tint to his grey skin, gills, needle sharp fangs, webbed fingers, a few fish-like scales visible on his forearms. And yet...

Special doesn't realize he's leaning forward until Delta tilts his head in amusement. He leans back immediately, clasping his gloved hands tighter on his lap.

"I think," Omega goes on, "that he might be able to touch you without consequences."

It's instinctive, the way Special stiffens, shaking his head desperately at Omega, clearing his throat to find his voice again.

"No, no, no, Megs, it'll end up badly-"

"Listen- listen to me, Spesh, listen," Omega interrupts his panicked babbling, craddling his masked face between two big hands, "i'm not pulling this out of my ass, okay ? Delta here, well, we needed a new quintessence ghoul, at least for a little while, until we could summon a new one, and...Delta volunteer for an...elemental transition of some kind."

Special blinks, shaking in Omega's grip. Well, that explains the funny feeling, the strange scent.

"But...Delta's still water," Special rasps. Omega hums, nodding.

"Yes, but not exclusively. He's not...quintessence either. It's more like...he became a vessel quintessence can pass through. He can channel it from the outside, dig it from the source rather than something within him like us quintessence ghoul do, quite literaly pull it from thin air, let it flow through him, and release it."

Special frowns, trying to wrap his mind around all this.

"But...raw quintessence, the one that is everywhere, is impossible to access to unless you are a quint, because your quintessence connects you to it, opens you a door. Right ?"

It's more words than he's spoken in weeks outside of interviews, but excitement suddenly buzzes in his body, brain finally feeded something to think about, to analyse, to study. Special is a cerebral creature, no matter what people might thing, and such an incredible discovery makes him feel almost alive.

Omega laughs, a breathless, amazed little thing.

"I know. But, apparently, we managed to crack that door open for Delta. He doesn't have much control over the quintessence he releases, but it's enough for the Clergy, for now."

Special glances toward Delta from the corner of his eyes.

"That's...you wrote it down, right ? Records of this could be incredibly useful-"

The smile he gets makes Special's heart miss a beat. Omega looks so fond, so full of love, it's almost painful.

"I did. I'll hand you my notes. But, back to you. What your quintessence does, is devouring energy out of living things-"

Special hangs his head down, shame creeping up his spine, wrapping around his throat.

"Hey, none of that, Spesh," Omega soothes, pulling his head up by the metal point of the mask's chin, "let me finish. What if someone was full of an energy they can fully dispose of ? If someone could let your quintessence take without it harming them, that means they could touch you. Delta could touch you."

Special blinks.

"But...you can't touch me."

"Because your quintessence takes the one at my core - drains me dry of a source of power so entangled in my being that losing it would mean losing me. But Delta's quintessence doesn't come from him."

Slowly, Delta comes closer, kneeling by the bed, offering his bare hand to Special, smiling, and Special- can't understand why. Why anyone would willingly take such risks - first the attempted elemental transition, now this.

Omega brushes Special's shoulder.

"Please, try it. I know...how hard isolation is for you. Please, sparkle, try. If anything goes wrong i'll pull Delta away before any real damages can be done, I promise."

The coppery taste of blood hits Special's tongue, and it's the only reason he's aware he's biting his lip. Then Delta talks.

"I volunteered, Special. I know this is going to work. I trust Omega's theory, and. I think I can trust you, too."

This time Special does sob.

"If I hurt you..."

"You won't. Give me your hand, Special, it'll be okay."

And Special is terrified. Terrified that it won't work, that he'll hurt Delta, who seems the nicest ghoul you could ever wish for. Terrified that it'll work, that the one time he manages to touch someone without killing them will kill him, that all it would take would be a brush of skin against his own to destroy him.

Despite all that, Special slowly, oh so slowly takes one glove off, revealing too-pale skin and twitchy fingers. Delta' smile widens, then the air shifts a bit, starts blurring around him. One of his eyes turns purple, his skin shimering slightly.

"It's a bit like holding my breath," the water (?) ghoul explains, "i can't keep it for too long, maybe a couple of minutes, after, i have to release it. Open the valves, kind of. But, if I just keep them open, just let quintessence flow in and out freely, like this-"

Another shift in the air. The shimer on Delta's skin dims, his features relaxing.

"Then I can keep it that way as long as i like, effortlessly for the most part. That's how we can touch. I'm ready when you are."

He's going to do this. Special is going to do this. His hand is shaky when he wraps it loosely around Delta's - ready to pull away at any moment - but the second their skin makes contact, he gasps and can't help tightening it.

Delta doesn't flinch. His skin glints a bit more, but that's it. Special's quintessence is hungrily drinking in the one flowing though Delta, but he doesn't need it. He can let Special take it.

Salt. Salt on his tongue, now. Special is crying. Holding onto Delta's hand for dear life, shoulders shaking, Special is crying, the water ghoul shushing him softly, thumb drawing circles on the back of his hand.

Omega helps unclasping the mask, watching with tears of his own as Special takes it off, throws it somewhere, who cares, where the balaclava and second glove quickly follow.

Delta opens his arm, still not letting go. Special sobs so hard he's sure it's going to turn him inside out, slidding off the bed and into Delta's firm, tender embrace, burrying his face in the water ghoul's neck, finally able to touch, to feel, truly feel.

He can't see it, but Omega's crying in earnest now, Delta fighting tears as well.

Special isn't okay. Special might never be okay, Delta might be the only person he'll ever get to touch, it might stop working at some point, there might be a catch, but oh, Special doesn't care.

He'd trade his infernal eterinity for this moment in time, folded in arms that hold him like something precious.

[asmo-d3us]

The Marauder’s Era characters as Uncles/Aunts

James Potter-Black - The Embarrassing Uncle

This man is giving that child ass loads of chocolate and sugar, and Regulus is watching from the side without a word.

Will hear the child fart and will start to tell everyone about what he heard without shame, thinking it’s something cute to say but it’s really not.

Will give you a 2 dollar bill because he thinks that makes him the cool uncle and that’s just even more embarrassing.

He will buy you a toy truck/a Barbie house when you’re 18 and think it’s cute because that’s what they played with “back in his day”.

Will pick you up from school and trip, grab the wrong kid, say hi to an old grandma and get whipped with her cane, cuss in front of a staff member, wear a cartoon t-shirt, etc.

Sirius Lupin - The Judgmental Uncle

Will talk about the wildest shit omd

He’ll be at a family gathering and start talking shit about everyone he can. “Yeah you know uncle Barty? Now, you know I’m not one to judge, but apparently his father whipped him because he fucked a man!” And Lily from 5 miles away is like, “SIRIUS BLACK THAT IS A CHILD!!”

Says the most out of pocket things, like it’ll be complete silence in the room and all of a sudden he says, “…I heard Marlene listening to Olivia Rodrigo, but the songs she made back in her Disney days-“

Remus repeatedly tells him to calm down with some of the shit he says because dear lord-

Was at a pool party once and Regulus got thrown in the pool and he went, “Poor boy can’t even swim, look at him he thinks he’s a mermaid…why’s he flapping around like that?”

Remus Lupin - The Wise ‘Old’ Uncle

Knows the weirdest facts? Like why does this man know how to hide a body (it helps uncle barty and evan at least?)? How turtles look like naked? What’s in outer space? How does he know we aren’t alone?-

Everyone comes to him for facts and studying and homework and he’s just a wise old man who looks younger than everyone else yet he’s smarter??

Will say some stupid quotes and speeches from books/theaters as ‘inspiration’ and he’d think he’s so wise and he just had a mic-drop moment.

Always tells Sirius to mind his own business and calm down yet he’s always being nosy and interrupting conversations with a new quote he heard.

Dedicates every single thing in life after something inspirational. This man is saying the goofiest shit like, “Oh c’mon don’t worry about those things! Hey, you know what I like to say? When life gives you lemons, make lemonade!!”

Peter Pettigrew - The Painfully Independent Uncle

He’s shorter than everyone else and people offer to help him when he’s reaching for the top cabinet but he always denies them bc one of the kids asked him for once.

Perhaps he’s independent because no one pays attention to him and that’s just what he’s used to.

Sorry.

Lily Macdonald-Evans - The Oversharing Aunt

No one knows why she shares so much about everything. She probably saw a poster that was looking for a missing dog and she’d talk to everyone about it.

This woman is yapping whenever she tells a story: “So I walked out of the house and I noticed the crunchy leaves and it reminded me of fall, oh did you know there’s a parade during fall? Crazy! Anyway, so I walked to a cafe and got my order and—WAIT so like the girl was really cute I asked her for her number, she was so sweet and so was the latte! Anyway--“

The type of aunt to order something with you and mention: “Yes that’s my order. I told ___ to order but they’re too embarrassed! Kids these days am’iright?”

Mary Macdonald-Evans - The Story Telling Aunt

This bitch be dropping some bomb ass lore every damn time there’s a family get together/gathering.

“When I was your age we used to go outside. There was this one time where I sliced my thumb in half when running! And then I saw the pope and he blessed me with a banana, and then I went back home and ate a knife—“

“You know, your aunt Lily murdered someone once—“ “did you know that uncle barty once beat me up—“ “uncle James ate 6 bees one time.” “I used to go outside and eat raw fish in the pond and I got salmonella. I could’ve died!”

Is making wild ass hand gestures at the table when telling a story and Lily repeatedly elbows her so she sits tf down.

Marlene Meadows-McKinnon - The unexplainably weird Aunt

Will sometimes approach you and smile at you for 5 minutes before walking away.

Will laugh at something so unfunny and will make a bored face when something is hilarious.

Will cut her finger and drink the blood and start hissing at everyone and will cackle to herself. People start feeling bad for Dorcas.

Will see a hot girl on screen and start barking and growling like a wild animal.

She’s just weird and the kids don’t get it, only the elders do.

Dorcas Meadows - The Artistic Aunt

Has thousands of tattoos that all mean something to her and it’s insane how many she has.

When you enter her house she has a whole room dedicated to her work and she does everything; painting, sketching, drawing, pottery, clay art, tattoos, piercings, etc.

Can look at your face and memorize literally every tiny detail.

Offers to do your tattoos/piercings when you’re older behind your parents’ backs because she gave ear piercings to all of the kids when they were little.

Regulus Potter-Black - The Stern Uncle

Won’t let you eat or drink anything sweet after 6 PM.

Will get upset when you sneak out or ditch school.

Very cold but when you know him very well you can tell his heart is made of gold—I mean seriously how can you think otherwise??? Uncle James is married to him!

Has favorites and allows them to do whatever they want. Will tell kids that if they don’t wash their hands the boogie monster will come and gut them. James told him to stop.

Barty Rosier - The Insane Uncle (duh)

Will casually announce to the whole table that he recently murdered someone. You would sit there in shock and look around the table, noticing that no one even batted an eye. Hell, uncle James asked him how it went!!

His and uncle Evan’s house is all dark and almost satanic. They have real skulls, blood and teeth in jars, they have a whole room filled with all kinds of weapons and body parts. You don’t know how they haven’t been caught yet.

They have a ‘plant’ room that they sell around.

For some reason he’s the best fucking uncle alongside evan and James bc he’s just so fucking funny and cool and chill and his kids are too and sometimes you wish they were your parents instead.

Right when you turn 18 he takes you out to make your ‘first kill’…and it’s not an animal. He also shows you how to defend yourself (if you’re a girl/weak especially), and shows you how to beat the shit out of someone.

Evan Rosier - The Crazy Uncle

Is the only one that manages to balance out barty.

Isn’t that crazy but whenever he is…it’s horrifying. (It turns uncle barty on for some reason?? Their kids hate it.)

Is so hot. Every time a friend is over they all fall in love with him. He notices this and he starts to feed their delusions. Every one hates it. You, Barty, and Sirius find it funny though!

One time he was so angry that he legit went out for a whole day, made Barty worried (which never happens), and came back 3 days later in the middle of the night drenched in blood and 50 murders circling the news.

Pandora does not support this behavior but evan got angry at her one time for bothering him about it and she let it go. They’re very stubborn which means he hasn’t apologized and she still brings it up to make him guilty.

Pandora Lovegood - The Adorable/Therapist Aunt

She’s just so whimsical and sweet and caring and nice and cute and pretty and and and

Always buys you crystals and spiritual things that she insists is very good for you and will protect you.

Surrounds herself with those blue eyes (?) to keep off bad energy.

Is covered in tattoos but they are small and meaningful.

Gives the best advice and her laugh is so fucking adorable.

She’s just here to show you that you belong, that you matter, and to include you in everything so you’re never left out bc she gets it. She’s the only one you can come to for anything.

[nitewrighter]

I think one of the reasons dc/warner bros like to push Batman (other than “cool/dark/edgy”) is ironically, it’s the easiest hero to sell toys of. As a character with no powers, he has to make do with tech, that means accessories! He can’t fly and doesn’t have super speed, ergo the Batmobile or batwing, or a bat jet pack! He needs different suits for different jobs, so that justifies variant figures! With other heroes, you’d just get the figure and that’s it. Why would the flash need a car? Why would Superman need power armor? If you’re old enough to remember, or research back enough, you’ll know the stupidity of the Superman mobile, or the just sad justice jogger. You could have a super figure’s eyes light up to show heat vision, but that’s about it. I guess you could have a green lantern toy line with construct accessories, but clear green plastic might be flimsy or too expensive, I don’t know. I’d think this was why they gave Wonder Woman a sword and shield, cuz they thought the lasso was lame, if not for BoYz DoNt LiKe GiRl HeRoZ! (Convo for another time, but even as a kid I hated that, and I was a boy)

So tldr, one of the reasons dc pushes bats is once upon a time they saw dollar signs at the idea of bat ji Joe.

Also the fact that you can make Batman Merch out of anything just by making it black and/or gray and just slapping a Batman logo on it--it's just probably a lot easier than finagling around other hero's color schemes.

Thinking about the Batsketball again...

But on a lore level, yeah, Batman is basically the "Cool Toys" superhero. You pretty much have every person in the DC universe commenting on how many "Cool toys" Batman has, or how much of a manchild having all those "Cool Toys" makes him. Like, I hate hate hate Frank Miller and of course I would fight him any day of the week, but the one thing All Star Batman and Robin had going for it was the GIANT BEAUTIFUL JIM LEE ILLUSTRATED BATCAVE PULLOUT MULTI-PAGE SPREAD. Like I need you to picture me in bed, giant glass of ice water on my nightstand, absolutely fucking miserable as I trudge through the worst fucking Batman characterization of my goddamn life, and then, AND THEN-- I go, "Oh, this is a pull-out," I carefully unfold it because library book, and then my jaw drops. I literally felt all the 8-year-old boy parts of my brain activate, and then you have young Dick Grayson's voice narrating it with five little words: "And it just. keeps. going."

A thing I really do like about all of Batman's tech and toys is they're all very tactile, and one of the things that's making Arkham Knight very fun as I'm playing through it is this factor of figuring out which of your little gadgets to use in which situation, and you're so proud of yourself when you figure out when the game expects you to use a certain gadget without the game cuing you to do so, or when you get a new gadget and then go back to all the parts of the map you previously weren't able to access without it (Baby "Square shape goes in Square hole" brain activation...) and the game also has very fun sound and vibration design and camera work to make using the various doodads feel very tactile even as it's happening in the game, but okay, let's take all those factors and pivot to Superman.

Superman doesn't have the Batcave, he has the Fortress of Solitude, and the Fortress of Solitude is not a Toy Chest like the Batcave is. The Fortress of Solitude is not a teenager's basement room to brood. The name itself is very intentional: It's Superman saying, "Yes, I save humanity, but I need breaks from it, I need a space to contemplate my work and my heritage, as well as get some distance from it for perspective, or else I will go fucking bonkers." And it's not just a house or a trophy room, either, it's a museum, it's an archive. I think about the Grant Morrison commentary about the bottle city of Kandor being a family heirloom like a snow globe or a music box--beautiful and yet distant, and that also sets a lot of the mood for the Fortress of Solitude: If the Batcave is a big toybox full of robot dinosaurs and a batarang target range and a lot of tactile stuff, then the Fortress of Solitude is a lot more, "You can look but please please please do not touch unless you really know what you're doing." You touch one crystal in the Fortress of Solitude and Jor-El's giant hologram head pops up booming 'KAL-EL, MY SON, THESE ARE THE PRECIOUS RECORDED HISTORIES OF OUR PEOPLE--' and you're like "Oh Jesus fuck how do I turn this off---"

One of the things I've come to really like in recent comics is how, as Superman has embraced having a family, that the Fortress itself feels warmer and more dynamic--Lois is using it as a space to research and write a book about Krypton, Kara tinkers with Kryptonian technology, Jon spent stints there as a toddler in Superman: Space Age, Krypto is there... It's actually kind of reflected how museums have become a lot more dynamic and kid-friendly in recent years. It's still clearly a space they all respect, but there's a much stronger element of enrichment than, "Look at this thing behind glass."

But anyway, yeah, Superman's stories are really more, like, fantastical than Batman's, so it goes to reason that Superman-play is more daydreaming and broad imaginative concepts while Batman-play is more physical and tinkering. So Batman in general is more likely to have lots of toys.

[becausebuckley]

fuck it friday!

it's saturday but i'm saying fuck it and therefore don't care. here's another bit from my post-s7 eddie fic, wherein ravi casually comes out to eddie and eddie tries very hard not to think about himself. we're gonna unrepress him i swear it's just gonna take a few chapters thanks @inell and @diazsdimples for the tags! tagging anyone else who wants to say fuck friday let's do this on saturday <3

“I mean, yeah, it sucks”, Ravi says, “but we’ll figure it out, you know? And it’s not like I’m in this alone. I have you guys on shift, and Bobby’s always around anyway, and I get to go home to my fiance every night, and he’s the best, so. I can handle it.”

Eddie nods, brain reeling from what he’s just learned. A new bit of ‘Ravi lore’, as Buck would call it. He wonders if Buck knows about this.

“Anyway,” Ravi continues, seemingly completely unaware that he’s thrown Eddie for a loop, “did I tell you what my fiance called Gerrard last week? It was so funny, he said that Gerrard’s just a–”

“You have a fiance?” Eddie blurts out.

Ravi looks at him as if he’s the one being weird. It’s stupid, considering Ravi is the one throwing truths into the parking lot at seven in the morning. 

“Uh, yes?” Ravi’s expression doesn’t let up in the slightest. “We’ve been together for years. I proposed to him when he got me McDonalds at three in the morning two months ago. It’s pretty cool.”

Ravi rambles on, either not noticing or not caring that Eddie isn’t fully paying attention anymore.

Because honestly, Eddie not knowing Ravi is seeing someone kind of tracks. He’s private like that, and really, Eddie is pretty convinced it’s not so much because he likes to keep work and private stuff separate, and more because Ravi likes the chaos he creates when he drops things like being a landlord and almost going to the national ultimate frisbee championships before deciding to become a firefighter instead into casual conversation. So no, that’s not what Eddie is hung up on.

It’s the pronoun of it all, he thinks, and he has one horrible moment of thinking oh no, am I homophobic before realising that that’s kind of bullshit. Because what he’s feeling right now isn’t disgust or anything.

It’s envy, he thinks. Maybe longing, too. Because Ravi drops his queerness into conversation so casually, not even pausing before going on about how he’s met his fiance – Eddie picks up something about crochet and strawberry allergies and protests, which makes no sense whatsoever yet sounds very Ravi – and here Eddie is, feelings buried so deep within the well it makes him nauseous to try and dig them up.

Eddie doesn’t dare pick up the shovel. Hasn’t done so in years.

He doesn’t want to think about what he might unearth if he tries.

[seth-burroughs]

mdarc chapter 1 rewatch part 3, and yes, i am aware of the massive pile of asks i have on all my blogs however as always i shall keep running. no don't stop sending them i absolutely appreciate the attention its just i need to mentally prepare two weeks in advance and cry in order to give a sufficient response. you should give it a try and converse with yours truly again some more if the thought of torturing and killing me slowly sounds fun and exciting to you👍

oh look its the child extortion scene

you would think halara, who's got all that trauma from having their family get scammed and destroyed by a friend* they trusted as a child, would be just a tiny bit less comfortable with swindling kids out of their money rn but like you know that's just my thoughts......

they're Reclaiming it <3

*listen. like i know i can't be the only one that thinks that way, but so far so many people ive seen that played this game just went through this gab and thought "oh wow a middle schooler just scammed them that is so crazy lmao", and like. i was under the impression that halara was the one in middle school the entire time, and their "best friend" was just some adult con artist that gained Halara's trust (or just flat out groomed them, honestly) so they could scam their parents. like, you do know this interpretation makes infinitely more sense than... very nefarious 12 year old manipulator investment scamming adults or whatever

has nobody already made a halara "fuck them kids" joke or do i gotta pull out that art program again

this child is like fucking what, five?? literally crying what is your PROBLEM halara...... halara i don't even think he understands half of whatever you're saying to him right now.....................

they didn't even give it back to kei they just tossed it over to yuma???????? lmao?????????

still. they're so fucking cool. i'm giving them the highest honor i can bestow (narcissistic personality disorder and massive autism)

AH WAIT I FORGOT WE ACTUALLY INVESTIGATE SHIT IN THIS GAME OOOOoooooh. ooooooooooh.

i forgot to read the report by the way

*points at jiei colan* SYMMETRY TOOL LMAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

oh holy shit wait canon age??? jiei is 48??? ok now that is information i am going to blast into my mind permanently and not like. anything slightly more important

casual fatphobia jumpscare

pink blood scene *nods solemnly*

holy shit i know exactly who the culprit is you wont believe it. im so fucking smart. im a genius im a fucking god fondle my nuts while you blow me

i can already feel seth approaching rapidly because my eyes are getting teary and my chest is doing really funny stuff right now. the sense went off

once he arrives i will keep a list of "memorable and beautiful things seth has done in all his 4 scenes" as well as "memorable and beautiful things desuhiko has done in the entire game or perhaps his life" and then compare once we finish. wish me luck

chapter 1 >>>>>>>>>> every other fucking chapter. i am going to kill a man on this hill

THERE HE COMES .

I'm twitching like hell right now. my muscles yearn for the burroughs

UUAAAAAIIIIIGIHUGFFYDFUUUUUGHGHHHHGAAAAAAAAAAGHUSYDGHSDUUUUUHHHHHHHHGGHHHHHHHHHGGGGGGGGHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! H H

HE HIS STUPID FUCKIDGFG WALK

take that rain cape off you fucking coward this is kanai ward. noticed his lil fox symbol on his back and got reminded of wackpedion's religious seth post but im not gonna look for it now. but yeah he's 100% metal fox church guy i told you this chapter got layerssss to it. this is cinema. video games lore have peaked at rain code chapter 1. scott cawthon has been really silent ever since rain code chapter 1 dropped

his face. its heeehhhhere. i am going tocommit vehicular manslaughter. and ask him why is his skin fucking gray

holy motherfucker I TOTALLY forgot how his japanese voice sounds. he sounds. slightly more normal actually. less pathetic if that was possible. its like he still has hope. help me he sounds so young

i like how. he just calmly extremely quietly tells them to stand up while standing like 20 feet away from them and knowing his voice usually doesn't reach above 30db. like he just stands there mumbling to them to plss get up now knowing they probably can't hear him. he jsut. gives it a try. maybe this time

maybe he's trying to awaken his telepathic abilities.

omg god a charlie radiohead wackpedion oc cameo???? i can't believe that wiki let spike chunsoft put charlie in their game in order to help increase sales it is so cool how they support smaller creators like that once again

that cunty stance. who stands like that.

its not fucking on. how did you notice its not fucking on. or did he just did but tried regardless. dead silence.

truly, a flattering introduction

and he. wasn't even that fucking mad he just gave him a very dissapointed look to go and fix that. which makes me think it has happened before. and numerous times

finally, seth has succeeded. you know whats crazy about that scene?? the peacekeepers were knocked out a solid while ago thats gonna be at least 15, if not just 20 entire minutes. realistically if youre uncounscious for that much time (and im pretty sure halara whacked them on the head) then you're gonna be concussed as fuck perhaps even have serious brain injuries (and im pretty sure halara whacked them on the head HARD) like youre not gonna be ok after this. his voice literally healed them. he commanded them to rise and so they did. combined with the blatant christian themes of rain code (makoto is satan. martina's motorcycle is the ark) the answer is obvious seth is jesus where was i going with this again

seth is so fucking chill its unbelievable. its the fourth time something has happened to him this moment, megaphone guy fucked up the fucking volume and he just. takes a few steps back motions with his arms and doesn't even say anything. if that were yomi he'd just bring out the whip. if that were martina she'd verbally abuse them so fucking hard they would not be able to look her in the eye ever again in their lives. if that were guillaume she'd start screeching at dominic to decapitate that man

i am going to look away whenever they mention Bodies Rotting Quickly In Kanai Ward from now on. i shall not. it is not worth it.

megaphone guy cringe moment

i would say something about the entire "public execution" moment but i think i already said enough before. so.

goodbye seth you absolutely fucking SLAYED it

[sunnychuuya]

Getting a Lil play time rn so

Whats happened with charley why do they know it's not him really and why is he replaced or whatever ??

Boglogogkalna

Whatvrhe fuck im confused

Everything from last night is blending together ngl

is it bad that I just googled the code for Ms packeryojs floor safe thing prolly but I don't get how that code relates to her in any way..?

God damnit Larry u just had to lose the key to the creepy cult tunnels

"The tooth will set you free" lmao

damn that vending machines empty forever

SAL NO YOY MOVIJG HERE DOES NOT WORK OUT ITS NOT GOOD YOU FUCKIJG DIE

Yayayya gonna live with larry

-"do y remember the first time I saw you without your mask?"

"How could I forget."

"You were headbanging so hard, it flew right off and whacked me in the face! Heh.

You were so worried about my bloody nose that you didn't even notice at first."

"I felt bad"

"Yeah but then once I told you I was fine.. why did you cry?"

"Because you didn't look away."

CRYIJG SCREAMING THROWIJG UP WHAT THE FUCK THEY DESERVE TO BE HAPPY

-huH WDYM SAL THE FUCK

-Guys what the flip

-"I think your dad was an alien or something" WHAT THE FUCK SAL THATS NOT CASUAL LORE TO DROP

-Larry honestly yea it's a bullshit story but so is like the rest of this fucking game so I mean

-yall wait has larry never had a bed in his room

"search apartments" mothefucker I've wrnt in every room what do u want from me

-"you want the tooth?! You can't handle the tooth!' Larrybim begging u to stop

-"what, no stupid pun this time?"

"I couldn't really think of any, to tell yathe tooth."

Ah so this is how Larry died, I reach through the screen and fuckijg strangle him

-ne/sw wtf can that mean

-Never eat soggy waffles like the directions is all I can think of lmao

-OH WM GEE ITS A COMPASS THING I WAS SMART SHCOKING

-it made a weird noise

-guys wtf why is it glowing

-"reality is a tangled web"

-t h e fu c k y o u m e a n t w o h r s l a t er w h a t h a p p e n e d

-what happened the last time ash tried paranormal stuff

-i don't like ash that much but thos moment with her and sal is cute

-okay I'm going to the dentist now time to daze the fuck out and think about sally face still cuz this is an addictiom

@mypinterestgotbannedsoimherenow

[vvitchering]

lmao ok last review of the season

That was the most mediocre thing I've ever seen. THAT was their finale?? LAST week's episode felt more like a finale than whatever milk toast this was.

And don't come for me with that "oh Hannah you'd be upset if they actually did something too weh weh" crap. YEAH I PROBABLY WOULD BE. Cause every single episode of this entire season has been one of two models:

Lets do Absolutely Nothing

Lets do The Worst Possible Thing But Make It Stupid, Too

So I guess in the grand scheme of things it's better to have gone the do Absolutely Nothing route for the finale. But also what a disappointing end to the most disappointing and shit season yet.

Aight let's talk specifics.

Why the fuck was that so easy to do. Din didn't even have to be there for any of that. They could have sent him a postcard later on like "ay whats up we retook mandalore" and it would have had the same impact. Nothing anyone did mattered because Axe just ended up dropping an entire ship on top of Gideon, negating any actual struggle.

Oh he broke the darksaber, are we going to explore the ramifications of that? Will this affect Bo-Katan who has done nothing but lust after that stupid sword for two entire seasons? Will we finally get some thought about what leadership means? Absolutely not!!!! It means nothing!! Toss it away and never speak of it again!!!!! SURE OK!!!!! GREAT.

We didn't actually physically see Gideon die and and you know how that goes so maybe he'll be back. Can't say I like that the clones he was making were clones of himself, I still think evil little grogus would have been more disturbing and fun.

oh so Paz dying didn't actually matter either, good to know we did that for shits and giggles Only.

No helmet off scene, either. Bleh. Whatever, I guess.

None of this had any actual teeth. No drama, no emotion, just a bunch of (kinda shitty actually??) CGI explosions and whoop looks like we won yay great

I'm actually very annoyed they they didn't follow up on any of the suspicious shit the armorer has been doing all season. I was SURE she was going to be one of the spies last week's episode referenced. We never did get an explanation about that, did we? lol

Okay let's look at the very limited list of things I actually did like:

Din finally adopts Grogu!!! But nope we're not doing the Mandalorian adoption rites and Din is going to act as unenthusiastic as physically possible about it. Cool cool.

Din Grogu? What. Is that how Mandalorian names work???? You know what would have helped with this? Some actual Mando lore at all at any point in this entire season about Mandalorians. Wow.

This isn't really a list of things I liked huh

sorry lol

Uhhhh IG is back? I think? Maybe? Hard to tell if its actually him or just a reset IG-11 model. So was IG-12 a totally different droid??? (Also if it was literally as easy as stopping by any random bar and finding a head why didn't we do that in the first place. What the fuck.)

uhhhh they have a very tiny little house now? With a froggie pond! That's cute.

Din still refuses to actually call Grogu his child in any capacity, despite just literally adopting him as his own. Din get over your issues, that kid has been yours since the second you made eye contact with him. I wouldn't be as annoyed by this if they'd given me any reason why Din would be so hesitant to call Grogu family.

Everything about this just felt too easy and too neat. It's an entire episode of "blink and you miss it because it took 5 seconds and no work to do" events that have zero emotional payoff because they wasted the entire season on stupid shit that was never followed up on or made any sense.

My only decent takeaway is Din and Grogu both survived, nothing that happened this season apparently matters AT ALL to ANYTHING, so maybe things can get back to normal next season.

I hope we get some kind of official explanation for this at some point. I maintain that something must have happened internally for the writing to suddenly take such a drastic and obvious nosedive. All I can hope is that this was a temporary fluke and I don't have more seasons of this kind of boring nonsensical bullshit to look forward to.

Season overall gets a .5/10. And that's being generous. Disney, you should be ashamed of yourselves. "Best season yet" my entire ass.

I wash my hands of this season.

[moyazaika]

My birthday was on the 25th of July, but due to certain circumstances we couldn’t have a celebration with my family (both sides of my family). I had a small celebration with some family on my actual birthday and it was really nice, but we will be having another celebration on the 3rd of August, this time with both sides of my family and also with some family friends. It’ll be Spider-Man themed because I’m a sucker for him. I had wanted to do a “dress inspired by a marvel character” but I don’t think it’ll happen. I’ll save you a plate of cake and also some of the food served. A family friend will be cooking and he’s amazing.

Know for a fact that the moment some sort of lore of Red is dropped, I’ll be the happiest person on the planet. I’ll defend their actions with everything I’ve got, they’re my beloved and they have a special place in my heart. I just wanna get inside their head (and Valentine’s too) and just,,, learn. I kinda feel like the pathetic yan, maybe that’s why I like him so much. But,,, I just need to understand them. Or maybe just to learn more and more and slowly piece together all the information given. I love your characters, they’re probably the first ones who have me like this.

So, while I was reading the part about the scene bitches I actually snorted and almost choked on my drink. The same thing happened while rereading an ask an anon sent that said “It’s always 2 dumb bitches telling each other exactlyyy”. I’ll keep them in the small folder I have of things that make me laugh. There’s many amazing anons here and even if they may not know me, I love all of them.

My middle school self felt attacked by the “he would totally make a powerpoint presentation and it definitely has those stupid fucking star transitions that are so slow they take 3 entire seconds to get to the next slide.” I felt so cool adding transitions and animations and even those clapping sounds in the end, now I see why some classmates thought I was weird /j😭 Twinning with pathetic yan

My main language is considered a romantic language (Spanish), so I can’t really say much regarding the preference Europeans have for themselves. Latin Americans winning once again- Still, I love languages, I love learning, and so far I’ve seen so many amazing phrases and words that have me just frozen in place having to understand just how beautiful a word or a phrase can be. Languages can be such a beauty, I’m hopelessly devoted to them. Something I wanted to share: There’s this word in Nahuatl (native language in Mexico) which is “apapacho” that could be translated in English to cuddle. It means “to caress with the soul”. It’s one of my favorite words. And there’s also this phrase in Nahuatl which is “Mitztemoa noyollo” which could be translated to “My heart looks for you”, which as far as I’m aware could be used to say you miss someone.

I feel like I write too much, end acting like some sort of overexcited puppy. I just get too happy, can’t help it. I’m jumping from one topic to the other 😭 anyways, hope you have an amazing week, you deserve it. Remember to drink water, eat well, and all the stuff you’re supposed to know. Keep the hard work but remember to rest when you need it! And even sometimes when you don’t feel like you need it but you’re supposed to. You deserve nice things, hope life treats you very well. Also, been thinking about drawing once again but I don’t really know what to draw, so please do share some ideas or stuff.

- With love, ❤️‍🩹 anon.

BRO I /COMPLETELY/ MISSED THIS ASK HEART NONNIE BELOVED HELLO <333 always loveeeee hearing from uuuu 💗💗💗

i hope ur bday was the loveliest so far!! as well as your actual celebration. would have been a week since then, but nevertheless i hope u enjoyed yourself!! spider man themed oh yEAHH i remember we gushed over the spider verse movies around the time the second one was popular good times haha when the internet was obsessed with o’hara fuck i need that man carnally 😂🙏🏼

know that every time you mention my oc’s in an ask you send i am in love with the way u talk about them. it just feels so introspective and i can tell u put thought into what u say and it flatters me greatly bshshuhshushjsj

I REMEMBEE THE CLAPPING SOUNDS HAHSU back in the days we used to use microsoft powerpoint now everyone just wants to use google slides damn 💔💔 but the dissolve transition.. the star one… they will Never lose their charm that shit was fire

languages are so lovely!! ive always wanted to learn spanish purely bc i hear it’s relatively easy for english speakers apparently, but it sounds so different to anything i speak and conjugations and grammar rules fuck me up and i’m scared 😭😭

my heart. my heart What. my heart. MY HEART LOOKS FOR YOU. IM FLOORED GAGGED THATS SO GORGEOUS OH MY GOD. bro. bro don’t even i’m like 2 seconds away from downloading duolingo i need this in my daily vocab ❤️❤️😭😭😭 oh that’s actually so beautiful; LOTE expressions of love my beloved <3 it reminds me of farsi’s jiggaram which is like,,, technically my liver,,, but comes off more as a term of endearment for people reeeealllllyy dear to the speaker and the connotations when speakers use it to mean like,, a part of myself i can’t be without,,, T_T I LOVE LANGUAGES THEYRE SO BEAUTIFUL 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

hmmmmmmmmmm i’m super indecisive so the worst person to ask for conclusive ideas or advice but maybe try drawing some marvel character? i know you like the mcu, so that might be fun!!!

[roseworth]

Finding out you watched tangled the series sent me into a reblog spree from your tangled tag because I recently finished it for the first time. so now I'm curious give me all of your fix it thoughts on the bad writing

hello im so sorry for ignoring this for so long but i forgor </3 but i love tangled the series so much it just makes me want to rip my skin off because of how much it sucks

the thing is. there is so much potential. if it was just a bad show i wouldnt care but the problem is it could have been such a good show <////3 i love every character and the plot lines were ALMOST there every time and it could have been so good i could fix this fucking show hhghghjghhjghgmhgjhjg

like right off the bat theres all the shit with the proposals that i LOVE. i love eugene and rapunzel both trying to propose to each other like 5 times but neither of them could ever get the timing right <333 but the problem comes in with. literally everything surrounding it. the idea that the marriage would trap them pisses me off bc at first i assumed it would be like. they eventually realize that marriage isnt a trap and its not the end of their lives. but thats not what happened. instead it was like "yeah the marriage is us accepting that our adventures are over and we're settling down" ?????????????? and everything chris said always makes me think like. can someone please check on his wife oh my god

THEN we've got varian. literally such a great character, his villain arc is the best arc of the whole show !!! but!! then it was over. honestly i think that varian was one of the characters that made it out relatively unscathed with no stupid choices for his character. but even then thats mostly because he just kinda got ignored after season 1. he didnt show up at all in season 2 except in a hallucination, and im not THAT mad about it bc obv they werent in corona so its not like there was really any place for him but like. please. anyways he got a quick redemption arc in season 3 but the worst part of that was that it was a little rushed so he made it out ok. but the problem comes in with the fact that chris got pissed off that everyone wanted to talk about varian so he refused to give varian anything interesting to do overall. but the problem is that there were already seeds planted earlier in the show to give him more to do (like everything with quirin and the letter) that got dropped bc they didnt want to deal with it

and CASS. oh my god. ive talked about her villain arc a hundred times because it makes me so fucking insane. it could have been so good. like you can go back to pretty much the first episode in season 1 and see cracks starting to form in her & rapunzel's friendship and there was soooo much to work with. but. "gothic was my mom but she kidnapped and abused you instead so you stole my destiny" what the fuck are you talking about. talk about being overshadowed! talk about being forgotten and never taken seriously!! talk about ANYTHING that youve already been upset about in the show!!!!!! what the fuck!!!!!!

and then fucking. the dark kingdom stuff at the end of season 2 with eugene:( :( :( i was a little excited for the dark prince stuff bc ! it could be fun!!! he found out that hes the prince of a dead kingdom and his mother died because of the stone thats the opposite of rapunzel! there was sooooo much there that just got forgotten :( we never even found out how the queen died or her fucking NAME. why did we abandon all the dark kingdom lore at the end of season 2 :(((( i love the dark kingdom its such a fun concept and i want more of it but like. go girl give us nothing ig. the kingdom got completely abandoned and forgotten about within 25 years! lets talk about that!!!!! fuck lets acknowledge ANYTHING about dark prince eugene !!!! and on that note i wish they had done a little more with the fact that edmund had been protecting the moonstone for his entire life just for someone to take it and leave and now his life's purpose means NOTHING.

also it pisses me off that season 3 became The Cass and Rapunzel Show. there were so many other characters with problems but everything else was ignored bc look! cass and rapunzel!!! like can we PLEASE focus on anything else for like 5 seconds.... why was the finale entirely just cass and rapunzel's fight :( everyone was dead on the ground and it was "and now cass and rapunzel are gonna spend 3 seconds handling it" like please..... you have a beautiful cast of characters that want to affect the plot so badly let them help

as a rapunzel fan i think that one thing that annoys me a lot about the show is that. rapunzel can never be wrong. i get that shes a disney princess and its a disney show so they cant make her TOO bad but like,,, all her weaknesses are the shit you say in a job interview. "shes too nice" "shes too upbeat" "she trusts people to much" i wish she had actual problems. like she tends to accidentally be selfish and focus on how she feels without thinking about how it affects other people!!! thats something they could have thought about more instead of making her always right about everything. and the fucking episode on season 3 where eugene says "cass abandoned you you need to let her go" then she goes back in time and changes his past and then hes like "yeah you shouldnt leave cass behind!" NO HE WAS RIGHT THE FIRST TIME. cass literally took the moonstone and left she doesnt want to come back why is the lesson here that rapunzel shouldnt let her go

and oh my god. lance im so sorry for what they did to you. he is SUCH a fun character i love him so much he should have had so much to do but NO he gets one lance-centric episode and a few lance-and-eugene-centric episodes in season 1. then he never gets focus ever again. he gets the moment in the season 2 finale where he starts fighting the ghosts (and i love him so much i love that moment) and then he never affects the plot again. hes so fun because he and eugene have basically the same backstory except lance never had The Moment where he chose to give it up so its so fun to see his approach to just. everything in the show. but we never get to see him!! he gets ignored and shoved to the side so that there can be more hookfoot centric episodes. i will forever stand by the fact that theres something about hookfoot could've been a lance episode. ALSO ALSO ALSO the episode that was pitched with the broken window at the orphanage :( :( :( :( :( i mourn it every single day i wish it had happened. he doesnt get taken seriously as a character even though they had sooooo many opportunities to! then i literally love that he adopts kiera and catalina at the end but. it doesnt get any focus. we dont get to see him getting closer to them (okay we get a little bit of it but STILL there should've been more) so it feels so unearned. i love their little family so much but give me MORE. NOW.

okay im gonna stop now but i have so many thoughts about this show i could fucking fix it. there is so much potential and i love every character so much and i love the version of the plot lines that only exist in my head

[auniverseforgotten]

1, 2, 13, 20

This ask surfaced in my box three weeks late SO HERE WE GOOOOOOOOOO

I am pretty sure this is for this game here !!

list 3 positive things about your current fandom(s)

[I never really leave fandoms but I'm just gonna list the ones that I know I actively reblog about?? Mostly to spare this ask from being five miles long szdfxcvg]

Fate Grand Order

-FGO is built on the back of SO MANY DIFFERENT fate IPs that you can honestly swing most headcanons and still have a really chill time in the fandom. It's also especially nice to find cool people who have cool HCs and shlorp them up into your brain.

-Really was the kick in the butt to finally start posting my writing. Posted one Saliama[ish] fic and people??? Liked it????? And my brain went !!!!!! and so I just kept going szdfxcg it's been great to practice writing more.

-Salieri is here next question [If that doesn't count, the people!!! Love you all]

[ALSO FAN SERVANTS]

Pokemon

-FAKEMON I love love love seeing everyone's fakemon!!! Or like non-existent regional variants of pokemon that DO exist, fossil versions, etc etc I just really love the creativity people have!

-Trainer designs! Yes even the stupid ones! Stupid referring to Official Gamefreak trainer designs szdfxcgvh I love seeing the designs of key figures in every generation and I always find a few favorites!! In Scarlet it was Arven [best boy,,,], Saguaro [who I swear. I SWEAR. HE LOOKS LIKE HANZO SHIMADA OKAY.], and Clavell. Tbf tho that's a mix of personality and design. TYME AND RYME THEY'RE ALSO SO GOOD, esp love Ryme's hair...very fond of Grusha as well.

All time fave tho is Wallace I fUCKING LOVE HIM

-So many fun characters to write!!! I haven't. Written much for Pokemon. And what I have written I haven't shared. BUT IT STILL COUNTS!

Tolkien

-Fan interpretations of characters!! I especially love seeing designs for Finwe's children/grandchildren because there is so much variety and diversity in the designs people create??? My fave are PoC middle earth designs tho bcus the movies are,,,so very white,,,,and it really makes no sense,,,,also fond of Radagast designs bcus I'm sorry guys but the fuckin bird poop hair whyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy

-Really in depth lore discussions! I rarely have the time to consume these/do deep dives, but there's just SO MUCH lore that Tolkien has shoved into these stories that I can always find a post discussing any specific thing I want to think about at any given time.

-Chill!! It's a pretty chill fandom!!! I rarely see drama!!! Everyone here stays in their lane and I love it!!!!

2. a headcanon you weren't sure about at first but have come to like!

Honestly with HCs I'm usually pretty open and just picking up neat ideas people have and dropping them into my brain smoothie! Typically when i don't like a HC I kinda just leave it there for those who do?

I guess you could count like. When I first saw female Salieri for example my reaction was just "oh that's neat, I like that!" and now I have multiple WIP writing pieces [and some published ones] with my favorite trans composer who you can remove from my grasp over my dead body. But it never hit a point where I wasn't sure about her tho bcus I thought the vibe was neat from the get-go, hmmm

Uhhhh younger me absolutely refused to believe that humans in the Pokemon world ever ate Pokemeat in any capacity? And now myself and a friend [and others I am sure] have discussed sustainable Pokemeat things such as Kinglers, whose big threat claw eventually has to be removed or it'll just. It'll just get stuck and die there. Or the concept of Bird Pokemon specifically laying unfertilized eggs that can be eaten, or the idea of Slowpoke tails voluntarily coming off [though that is now illegal due to Team Rocket's actions in the well].

Mind I do still think there are people who would NEVER in their life eat Pokemeat, which is why it's so fun to play around with! I was actually working on an Ingo fic set in PLA where he just. Has to adjust to people eating Pokemeat because that's just how it is. They need meat to survive and it's a time where Pokemon are seen more as nuisances and threats than treasured partners. So throughout it he struggles to really eat things for quite a while [getting flashes of memories when Pokemeat COULD be considered safe for ??????? reasons] and it's a whole adapting to it kinda thing with the help of others around him. And then he goes back home and he's still screwed :D

13. your favorite type of fandom event (gift exchange, ship week, secret santa, prompt meme, etc)

Hmmmm. Well I think they're all cool, but for me personally I'm not really confident in writing things as a gift for others. Orz Definitely don't really feel like my writing is at a stage where it would be good enough for a gift exchange or a secret santa. Ship weeks are fun, I'm still trying to finish up my late stuff for a rarepair week...and I do enjoy prompt fills! I should go find the boards and forums and such for my active fandoms, it would be fun to try and fill some!

20. your very first fandom!

Oooo hard to say. The first media I really consumed with a fan mindset was definitely Pokemon, but I mean that as in like. I was buying the VHS tapes, getting the games, the cards, have a whole ton of figurines, plushies, etc. But I didn't really interact in fandom spaces as much with it?

The first fandoms I really peeked into fandom spaces for were about the same time, and that was for a manhwa called Demon Diary and Tolkien's works. That was the first big finding out about livejournal and ff.net and all that shit and actually consuming fanmade media on top of official stuff.

Tolkien also has my first big ship, Glorestor [Glorfindel/Erestor], which I still love to this day and is also very much that meme about how people will see two people who NEVER INTERACT and go "yep that's it that's the ship" BUT IT WORKS WELL with them bcus of their roles in Imladris and etc etc I won't get too off topic here xdfvb

Thanks so much for the ask!! :D

[ntshastark]

MAWS s2 liveblog: 2x05

turns out i'm not getting any notifications from serializd, which kinda defeats the purpose of having the app at all (i used to use tv time but then they completely ruined their desktop ui), so i'm apparently 3 eps behind and had no idea

ever since the dcu superman film set photos came out i've been on an early!clois fic-reading binge (mostly rereads, it's the first time i do this) and it highlights so much everything this adaptation missed out on having........ the rivalry, the identity porn, the banter........ i know i talk about this every time i watch this series, but they've literally taken out every shingle one of my favourite things about early!clois (which is my fav clois era!!), and i just can't understand why someone would do this on purpose!!! i mean, we could be having this

"oh but it's a kids cartoon" you say. well, then we could be having this

i just. WHY DID THEY HAVE TO SAND OFF LOIS' EDGES SO MUCH, THIS IS NO FUN!!!!

and i have my complaints about clark, especially how they handle his secret identity and make him look stupid, but i'm overall much more flexible about his characterisation (in that i have my personal preference but am ok with a bigger range of the 'is he truly clark or superman' spectrum) than i am about lois' (in that she is My Girl, and she needs to be mean, tired of everyone's shit, and at least a little bit scary, otherwise that's not the woman me and clark fell in love with!!)

==

OH HEY

SPEAKING OF 'SHE'S MY GIRL AND THEY SHOULD LET HER BE MEAN'

SHE'S FINALLY HERE (i think?)

(and she's just? walking around town?? in earth clothings???)

==

AND SHE'S MEAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

==

oh

hm

idk how i feel about this

i mean, i was a sucker for karolsen in cw supergirl, but that was a very different jimmy (and, i'd wager - and hope - a very different kara)

(also i 100% thought maws!jimmy was gonna be gay tbh)

==

i genuinely hate how this series treats his secret identity (which, again, is one of my favourite parts of superman lore. so. targeted attack, i tell ya)

(and you know what else gave me a watered-down lois and a clark with a crap secret identity??? man of steel. how is this series so completely opposite in tone and yet still keeps so many of the same sins??)

==

🤨

she did say her name is kara, but i remember fake-out supergirl in smallville, so i'm not holding my breath

==

my mind cannot comprehend giving someone mint chocolate chip as their first ice cream, the first time i ever actually saw mint chocolate chip ice cream for sale i was a full grown adult

==

^ exact opposite reaction i had two days ago when i started mulheres apaixonadas only to find out the pairing i'd been looking forward to the most are first-degree cousins

(yes, they end up together. and yes, i dropped the novela. can't stomach incest ships, it's why i never started house of the dragon despite loving royal intrigue stuff)

==

wait, wasn't he married??

==

oh god... did they mention his full name the other times he showed up?? bc i thought it sounded familiar so i googled it and it's fucking cyborg superman, i'm so fucking stupid

==

omg silver st cloud!!

was i supposed to recognise the other two as well? bc i'm really bad with names (as i've just demonstrated) and also not all that knowledgable about minor dc characters

==

oh i was wondering about that

==

[banging head against the wall] WHY DO THEY HAVE TO MAKE HIM SEEM SO STUPID

==

so pretty tho......

==

why is everything so bright.....

also that hot dog looks dry af

==

see, this is what you get when you skip all the fun identity porn phase. the masses don't even think lois and superman are fucking.

==

and she's also stupid!

==

genuinely, can you imagine any other lois lane getting told this???? i get they want to make their female lead relatable in her struggles or whatever, but ughhhh

like, where's this energy

and i get wanting to have a younger lois who's not so established in her career in order to give her conflict and opportunity to grow stuff, but the attitude!! smallville!lois didn't even want to be a journalist (which is a creative decision i'm also not a fan of), but she was so absolutely lois in the way she acted, y'know? not a single person who knew that girl would be surprised to find out she'd bagged a semi-god! meanwhile this lois has just. such loser aura.

and i know they're aware of this because that one episode with the multiversal lois league or whatever was basically all "yeah, this lois is kind of a loser when compared to the other ones, but this clark loves her anyway!!"

==

oh she's so angry!! i love her!!

==

ok great scene

==

hard to connect emotionally with this scene when i basically agree with everything she's saying

==

uh

==

why is she speaking english instead of kryptonese tho

==

oh she looks cool

==

OH SHE'S STRONGER THAN HIM!!!!!!!!! GO KARA BEAT HIS ASS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

==

well. it's definitely not what i was expecting. but i guess it fits with how they were developing krypton, and it's definitely interesting! i was worried about kara having been shown as a baby while leaving krypton, that maybe they would've made her grow up in the ship with only false memories, but she's... immersed in the culture, i guess... somehow... it's definitely not what i would've guessed, and whether i like it or not is gonna depend on how they deal with it (if this was mainverse kara i definitely would've hated it, but an au is au, so let's wait and see)

tbh i was worried she'd get the the cartoon!starfire* treatment and be depicted in an overtly childish manner (which is. not exactly unheard of in this series), so her instead being an imperialistic war criminal is better than what i was expecting lmao

(*= whom i love! but whom i met 1. before knowing anything about the original kory, and 2. as a child. and who's also done irreparable damage to mainverse kory, so can't blame a girl for being afraid)

now i'm curious about her "father"... she said her and clark are the only kryptonians left, but it could be something similar to the jor-el hologram thing, i guess. i know zor-el has been depicted in a more villainous light at some points so who knows, might even be his consciousness inside a robot or whatever

anyway, it's an interesting change. has potential. at this point i don't really trust this series to explore it as deeply and seriously as i would like, or to not fall back into the tropes i was afraid of as soon as her redemption arc is over and she becomes jimmy's born child-friendly yesterday girlfriend, so i'll not keep my hopes too high, but this could be fun!

[thatonegayship]

Oh, I fucking ROLLED in this one, straight BATHED in it, holy shit. Once again getting my thoughts together so that I write more than just a 'djhfjhskjfhajkhs' and a bunch of fire emojis.

First of all, let me just say that I absolutely love the way you opened this with that slow, building reveal. I was a bit confused going in, I hadn't expected a whole meal walking into what looked like an extra long ask at first, so it took me a second to realize you were feeding us. Like, oh? They're in a cave? There are feathers involved? Bill is complaining again? I love how you drop us into these scenes without fully explaining the circumstances. Of course, that's not really necessary with the opening note above, but it's still so cool that you don't just open with "They're in the cave because ___." Like, I'm just supposed to accept that they're there, and they're being gay about it. So true, bestie <3 <3 <3

It's always such a treat watching these two interact; they're goddamn adorable the whole time. I love those little nibbles of extra lore you give us a peek at, how Dipper's brought him home little souvenirs like emeralds and harpy feathers and stuff. Can we talk about how cute it is that he goes on these dangerous excursions without his flame-throwing husband, spends a couple days gone, and when he gets back, he's bringing gifts??? Ehehehehehehe <3 He was thinking about him!!!! He wanted to surprise him!!! He got kissed all over for it!!!

**Petition for Dipper to bring home at least ONE limb from every monster he fights so crazy familiar husband can swoon over how ruthless and scary he is**

What is this Flower Incident we speak of? I'm very interested to know more :3 Is it, perhaps, an aphrodisiac? Or perhaps something deadly? Is there a story to this that I'm not remembering??? My curiosity is piqued!!!!

I'm gonna be that bitch, but it's so cool how Bill literally just Knows languages. Idk, like you know in movies how there's always like a scientist or archologist who finds a wall inscribed in a dead language and they just go "ahh, this is the long-forgotten tongue of the Shen-ty tribe, I have studied their culture for decades and so speak a broken rendition of their language." Bill is that guy times a million. I don't think Dipper would ever admit it, but it's super useful having him around for that sort of thing, really helps them out wandering through old, abandoned caves and tombs and such.

Still, I can't help but think it would be really funny if Bill, eternal, infinite, practically-all-knowing Bill, knows nearly every language, except for, like, French or something. Purely because he thinks the French are stupid to deal with, so why bother? So he just doesn't know that language, even though he knows long-dead languages, and languages from across the galaxies, and languages spoken by different species. And I think it would be really funny if they end up needing someone who can speak French, and Dipper ends up being that guy because he took maybe 2-3 years of it back in high school. He's kind of rusty, but he gets the job done.

Bill is just so nonchalant about finding cursed items, huh? Had me shaking my head the whole time because I KNEW what was about to happen. Yeah, sure, it's soooo safe. Just put the cursed object back into the squishy mortal's hands, why don'tcha? That's like saying a landmine isn't dangerous because it's old and moldy. GET A CLUE, BILL!!! DON'T GIVE THE CLUMBSY OOPSIE-DAISY FALLS-FLAT-ON-HIS-OWN-FACE-OFTEN GUY A CURSED TABLET!!!! DON'T!!!

Their subtle affection is soooo sweet. Bill's lil hair-ruffles, and Dipper's "I think I can live with that" fjdhsfjhfdjsjhf. Living. Dying. Collapsing to the floor in a broken mess of tears. I love how Bill just tries stuffing Dipper's brain full of knowledge when he's feeling it, and Dipper's just like "HA! Nice try, jerk. My brain is a sponge and it's soaking up every last drop >:D" Their love language is just challenging each other constantly, and rising to the occasion because they're so well matched and I eheheheheheheeeeeee!!!! Had me kicking my feet a few times, ngl

And then the TRAP!!! Oh my god, the way I gasped through that whole scene. Honestly, I was a bit curious how the curse was going to happen- if maybe Dipper was already cursed, and we just didn't know it. It makes sense that the whole You Break It You Buy It moto would apply here. In this case, Dipper pays a pretty high price. Personally, I don't see 100% truth as a total curse, not unless you're a compulsive liar, but Dipper is of course an acceptation to this rule. Because the second HE tries to lie and truth comes out, Bill goes full panic-mode and starts searching. Sometimes I forget that, while they're a lot more open with each other than before, their relationship still relies heavily on mind games and half-truths and outdoing the other at all times. They aren't used to having open and honest conversations, and they definitely aren't used to telling each other everything. Made me wanna smack Bill over the head when he was finally like "but you don't usually complain." Yeah because he's a big strong man, now kiss him better, idiot.

It's the fact that Dipper said "It hurts," and just immediately braced for Bill to poke fun and mock him for it. Babe, I hope stupid Bill stumbles over himself every time and tilts your head and checks your eyes and pries your arms away gently to examine even the smallest little cut. I hope he kisses you all better, even though he's a massive dingle nut with pee for brains. You deserve the world, baby boy. You deserve it all.

NOT HIM TELLING BILL NOT TO GET UPSET FDHJHEJHWEH LIKE HE REALLY WENT THERE!!!

I feel like an unspoken rule between them has always been "Don't bring up Bill caring about you and having FeelingsTM," but you know what? Fuck that, I'm feeling sentimental tonight and I say Bill was soooo upset for those last fleeting moments, and he would've gone absolutely feral with dread if something ended up being wrong with Dipper. Something IS wrong with him, but it's not life-threatening at least! Not like last time. Last time, which I'm STILL crying over, mind you. It's so nice getting those little crumbs of reference to the whump throughout btw. I immediately knew what he was referring to when he mentioned the scar. As someone who works a lot with visuals and such, I'm like, SO interested in what that looks like. Like I re-read it, of course, and I just keep picturing what a massive scar like that would even come out looking like.

Because I'm thinking- The claws start at Dipper's shoulder, right? Sorry, my imagination gets away from me at times, so it's hard to recall when something was written, and when I've just altered it to suit my tastes. BUT! As far as I can remember, it starts at the shoulder and rips down his torso. THAT! Is a badass fucking scar, if so. I'm talking full four claw-marks just absolutely tearing across that chest in a hella cool jagged pattern. And not to be a whore, but I like to think the tip of one of the claws nicked his upper lip, so he's got the slightest corner-scar going on there 😳 No, but how fucking cool is this scar? At least an 8 out of 10, right? Like this is a badass fucking scar, and it's sexy and cool and makes Bill kinda excited once he gets over wincing at the memories. Hey! That's the price of marrying a badass human! He gets roughed up and sexy-hot with this massive, mysterious scar that just adds to his design. Now all he needs is a couple of magic tattoos and a tongue piercing, and he's Gravity Falls' Number 1 Bad Boy.

Back to the matter at hand; I'm gonna ring Bill's neck <3 Not him saying "Don't kill yourself, I'll have to replace you." BRO SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UUUUUUUP!!!! Okay, I get it, you're a whimsical bastard and you didn't mean it, but it's so hard to root for you sometimes T0T I'm sorry, I love you, may you never be wronged, but good sir, I hope Dipper speaking this level of truth inadvertently shows how freaking bad some of this is for him. The fact that he was literally like "lol yeah, it worried me sick last week that you were going to cheat on me because I'm not good enough for you." DO YOU SEE THE ISSUE WITH SAYING THAT SORT OF THING TO YOUR EXTREMELY SELF-CONSCIOUS AND ANXIOUS HUSBAND, BILL??? DO YOU????

Don't Take It Too Seriously And Immediately Baby Dipper Challenge (Impossible)

I'm sorry, but I must come to his aid. I just want Bill to ask something that he thinks is gonna stroke his ego and ends up setting off a whole landmine truth on himself. Just a full blast to the face of "I'm afraid you'll abandon me" and "I know you love me, but sometimes I wonder" that gets him thinking like, oh, shit, I may have fucked with him a little too hard. Yes. Yes, you have, and now the only way to amend it is by saying something of your own, that is ALSO vulnerable and embarrassing and sincere. After the word-vomit Dipper let out, he's probably balled in a corner out of mortification, thinking Bill's gonna mock him for this, too. How pathetic of him.

"I've done it before" had me SCREAMING by the way. Literally killed me and brought me back to life. Just fucking punched a hole through my skull and swung me over its head like a Neanderthal. I'm banging my chest at it, frfr. Might need to check me into a mental hospital later. What kinds of secrets is he keeping? STILL keeping, I should say, because we know a few of them now. I'm sort of impressed that Bill hasn't used this truth curse to his advantage and tried getting it out of him. Then again, he's not the type to want every little puzzle solved for himself. He likes the slow reveal of those special thoughts. And maybe some things are best left un-said.

Damn it Bill, I'm a little mad at you at the moment, but I am SO glad you jumped at the opportunity to squeeze a lil something outta your husband, it was so satisfying to hear. Yes, he does love you, and you are the most handsome man he has ever met in his life, it literally broke the scale he was rating you on. You are literally perfect for him. Just the most awful and wonderful being he's ever met. Dipper is literally obligated to tell the truth, and he is TRUTHING IT UP!!! Let's give it up for 100% sincerity!!!

And then he hits him with the WHAM!!!

Subjectivity is SUCH a low blow but damn it if Bill doesn't deserve what's coming to him. Of course, someone as snarky and clever as Dipper is gonna find a loophole in all of this, and that probably wasn't the ONLY one! I mean, just because Dipper has to tell the truth doesn't mean he has to tell the truth about whatever's been ASKED of him. Maybe some asks him "Oooh where is the magical key that unlocks the evil king you imprisoned???" and Dipper's just like "The capital of New Jersey is Trenton." Truth curse is easy and dumb, actually. Soooo easy.

That butt-smack made it all better, Bill. I forgive you now.

Lol omg at your last ask because imagine dippers under some truth spell and ends up spilling a bunch of secrets that Bill already knew and had stashed to use for later

This is no longer 'last ask' relevant because I had this partially written in my drafts for like a million years - but a Truth spell on Dipper would be very interesting!

So I took this prompt and didn't really answer it except in some ways.

Here's a thing!

“You never bring me any souvenirs.” Bill complains. In an all-too-whiny tone, and an all-too-close lean into Dipper's personal space.

Plus, it's a blatant lie. One Dipper shouldn't respond to. 

He does anyway. “I literally brought you harpy feathers last week.” 

“Doesn’t count! That was for a ritual you wanted to pull off!” Bill sounds miffed, though he also plants a palm on Dipper’s head and starts ruffling hair. “Now where's the emerald from last March? Or like, the headdress from that cult with all the rabbit bones? The good stuff."

Dipper grunts. He focuses on navigating back out of the cave, turning the clay tablet over in his hands.

Figures Bill would remember all the times he did get something. His memory is excellent. And he’s greedy, because a new toy every time is a big ask. 

What does Bill expect, anyway. Not every situation Dipper gets into has something to bring back. What could he even offer? An ear taken off every monster he has to fight?

Wait, no. Bill would love that.

Dipper makes a face. “You've just proved that it's not ‘never’. With examples." 

"Sure, but when’s the last time it was cool?” 

Dipper sighs. No point in arguing. Bill could go on forever about how 'unfair' it is that he doesn't get trophies from every trip, or trinkets from conquered lands, or, again, ears from every enemy. When he’s decided to complain, no reasonable argument will shake him out of it.

“Too bad, then. You’re only getting some gifts.” Dipper shakes his head rapidly to dislodge Bill’s hand from his hair. "It’s hardly the worst thing that’s ever happened to you."

“Hey! I could argue that it’s related! In fact -”

Dipper tunes out the rest of Bill’s ramble, rolling his eyes. Listening with half an ear to Bill's ongoing tirade about being a poorly kept man, and unappreciated in his time. 

Despite how much he already has, Bill always wants more. Somehow he sniffed out Dipper’s latest excursion, showing up right at the end and looking for ‘loot’.

Which Dipper, by all rights, should prevent. 

 Anything magical falling into Bill's hands can cause chaos, no matter how innocuous it seems. The flower incident alone is reason not to hand Bill anything, ever, and the fact that Dipper still does sometimes should be appreciated, damn it.

Bill's complaining on and on, but whatever. Eventually he'll get bored.

 In the meantime, Dipper turns the clay tablet around again with a frown. He found something interesting, at least.

Whatever this is, it’s definitely not a language he recognizes. The script is strange, scrawled in different directions. For all he knows he’s holding it upside down. He hopes Bill doesn’t notice until he’s figured out - 

"Whatcha got there?" Just as expected - and right on time. 

Dipper feels the tablet yanked out of his grasp, unfazed. He doesn't break his stride.

"I found it in the lair, after... you know." Charred bones, explosions - Dipper wishes he could use, like water, or something, but mastery over even one element is powerful as is. "Anyway, that monster was collecting a lot of weird magic stuff, and this was the only interesting thing it had." He shrugs. Then, because Bill will like it, adds, "So... to the victor go the spoils?"

“Now that’s the spirit!” Bill gives him a grin, holding the tablet up to squint at it. Thankfully not turning it around. One point for Dipper, on not looking incompetent.

Still, if anyone can read it…

“What language is this?” Dipper not-so-subtly leans over, trying to peek around Bill’s arm.

"Old Draconic," Bill says, without missing a beat. Humming to himself as he apparently reads the text. Perking up a bit, smile widening. "Oh, hey! Iambic pentameter."

"What does that mean?"

"Nothing, sapling. I just wish when people did the whole 'ancient poetry curse' thing, they'd get a little more creative. You never see hexameter! Or tetrameter! Not even a tasteful use of spondee.” Bill sticks his tongue out.  "Come to think of it - I don’t think anyone’s done a prose epic that made the reader wanna tear their eyes out since Joyce."

Sometimes with Bill, you have to read between the lines. The long, irrelevant babbling lines.

"Just tell me if I need to get Ford or not." Dipper says, flat. He rubs at the bridge of his nose. 

Among all the other stuff, Bill said ‘curse’. Never, ever a good sign.

Though the monster he just took down wasn’t a dragon, and that wasn’t really a ‘horde’ so much as something resembling the contents of the Mystery Shack, there’s absolutely no good thing about a curse. If Dipper somehow triggered it - 

Great. As if hanging around Bill alone didn’t invite enough bad fortune, he’s picking up parts of his own stupid curiosity.

"Nah, don’t bother with the loser uncle!" Bill waves his concern away, amused. “This is just purple prose! Buncha  ‘oooh, bad things’ll happen if you mess with my stuff.’ Totally boilerplate spellcraft with some flowery wording.” 

With a shrug, Bill dismisses the whole thing. Which includes chucking the tablet over his shoulder, but Dipper manages to snag it before it falls and shatters into a million pieces.

“Typical dragon horde enchantment. All bluster, no burning.” Bill keeps walking without a care in the world. “They’re full of hot air!”

“So I’m not cursed,” Dipper prompts, catching up to him. “Aside from you, I mean.”

“Flatterer,” Bill says, slightly warmer. He continues, shrugging. “No reason you would be! No dragons in the area, and the warning sign there’s too old. By my guess, the original horde was raided centuries ago! Just another piece of random crap that got dragged into that junkyard." And he ruffles Dipper’s hair again, in the second-most annoying way. "You’re stuck with me, though.”

Dipper ducks and twists, thus freeing himself from the minor torment. “I think I can live with that.”

One would think that chatting with a demon - one as cryptic and ominous and aggravating as Bill - would only cause irritation, at best. 

It still does, of course. But when it comes to Dipper, Bill… sometimes lays things out straight. On occasion. Especially when he’s instructing, doubly when it comes to magic. Like he’s trying to pour all the facts he can into Dipper’s brain, overfilling the cup.

If his goal is to overload this one mortal mind, though, he'll have to work a lot harder. 

Dipper gets out his notebook, while Bill looks away, and pretends he didn’t see it. Yet another poorly-veiled lesson, with Bill obviously trying to plant seeds re: actually casting curses. Tough luck managing that. His subtle lean towards chaos might escape the unwary, but to Dipper? Bill’s way too transparent.

The fact is, that Dipper absorbs things fast. Even Bill will admit it, sometimes without being prompted. 

That Includes stuff Bill doesn't even know he's teaching.

Bill’s also rambling on about historical curses, and how often these things backfire, or misfire. It’d almost sound like a series of unconnected, gossipy anecdotes, if it weren’t for the extra technical details. 

And Dipper’s not falling for it. As far as he's concerned, his first curse was his last one.

But then…

Even if he’s not going to use the knowledge, there's no reason not to learn it. Knowledge about making curses can also be used to break them, after all. Taking all the facts Bill smacked a ‘For Evil Purposes Only’ sticker on and using them to shatter an evil plan would be very satisfying.

They’re nearly out of the cave at this point, so Dipper figures it’s fine to let his guard down a bit. The monster's dead, all the traps were cleared out on the way in - everything should be fine.

He clicks his pen a couple times, and asks Bill to repeat that last thing, about the life drain. It gets a snort of amusement, but Bill’s more than happy to elaborate at length. Dipper struggles to keep up with Bill’s rapid-fire speech; he's trying to make this intentionally difficult, damn it.

Bill leads on with careless gestures and an uninterrupted stride. Getting ahead of Dipper by several meters, but Dipper’s got to note down what he says before he has to do something awful, like ask Bill to repeat himself.

Dipper is, in fact, so busy trying to write in shorthand, and walk, and not hit a stalactite with his face, all at the same time, that he sort of loses track of where he is.

And okay, maybe he trips over a rock slightly, and nearly faceplants, bonking against the sudden curve of a wall with a swear.

Dipper takes a step back, rubbing at his forehead. Annoying, but, whatever. There were a few traps around, but he pretty much cleared out the cave on the way in, so it’s probably - oh, hell.

Not fine, he dropped the stupid tablet.

Great. The only really interesting object, shattered into half a dozen pieces. So much from saving it from Bill; Dipper himself fumbled the bag.

He backs up to evaluate the damage -

The stone sinks under his foot, and something goes ‘click’.

With a start, Dipper raises a shield without thinking, arm jerking up as he wills his magic into the gesture. It's solid enough for something done on reflex, but an impact hits hard on his side, with sudden, stinging pain. 

And a pretty hard impact, at that. He didn’t get it solid enough, damn it, wasn’t expecting something physical -  

Dipper wheezes out a breath, slumping to the ground and clutching his stomach. 

Alright. So. He got most of the traps. 

He sits down, and lets his head thump back against the stone, teeth bared in a grimace. Stupid. Should have been paying attention. 

The commotion makes Bill turn his head, blinking at Dipper sitting on the ground. 

Then -  because he’s an asshole - he starts laughing. 

“I know I’m fascinating, sapling, but really?” He tuts, setting fists on his hips. “Not sure if I should be flattered that you’re obsessed with me, or disappointed that you’re dumb enough to walk right into a wall.”

Dipper sucks in a breath, gingerly touching his side. Doesn’t seem like - he glances down. Sure, it stings, and his shirt’s torn, a long, shallow cut on his stomach, just near the old scar. But that’s about it. Over to his side, an arrow rolls against the ground, stone head clicking against the ground.

Over by the cave mouth, Bill’s cackling. God, he’s a jerk sometimes. 

But he must not have seen the trap set off, too wrapped up in his own stupid bullshit, or he’d be less of one. Dipper knows that for a fact. Though he’d really, really prefer he’d never had that experience. 

“C’mon, kid. If you’re not even more brain damaged from your bump, let’s ditch this joint.” Bill jerks his head over his shoulder. 

Dipper hugs himself around the torso, grimacing. Not bothering to respond. His heart is still pounding, or he’d have a retort ready. Adrenaline’s helped him out in a lot of situations, but not with talking. He’ll get up when he’s ready.

“What, you smash your skull open or something?” Bill raises one arch eyebrow. 

Though Dipper knows why Bill’s like this, it’s still deeply annoying. He shakes his head in lieu of a reply. In a second, he’ll be calm enough to tell Bill exactly what he thinks of his incredibly poor bedside - and cave-side - manner. 

“Figures. Can’t leave you alone for five minutes without your guts spilling everywhere.” Bill clicks his tongue, folding his arms and stepping forward. “What’s the damage?”

“It hurts.” Dipper says, through gritted teeth. Then pauses. Wait, he meant to say - He shakes his head rapidly, only for more words to force themselves out, unbidden. “I got cut again.”

Again, not what he intended. Dipper lowers his chin, teeth clenched. What the hell, he shouldn’t have said that. Bill’s mocking aside, maybe he did hit his head a little too hard. Once Bill gets the mockery out of his system, he’s going to be a total pest about it, too.

With a huff, Dipper slumps. Settling in for a sulk, waiting for the next jab - But there’s no insult forthcoming. Or argument. 

In fact, Bill’s gone totally silent. Which is super weird. 

Dipper looks up at the cave entrance, expecting a comment or a question, or at least a huge grin. He tenses up, hunching over.

And meets a frozen, unsmiling face. 

Bill dropped his arms, they hang limp by his sides. His expression’s gone blank.

The next moment, he’s right in front of Dipper, kneeling and tugging at his arms with alarming urgency. 

“Alright, lemme see.” Bill’s face is very close. Though he’s trying to pull his arms away, Dipper resists out of sheer surprise. Bill growls, eye darting around until it lands on the arrow. “Oh for - Really can’t leave you alone for five minutes. Move.” 

Another pull, less hard this time. Like he’s trying to ease Dipper’s arms away.

“Wh- Hey!” Dipper plants a foot against Bill’s chest, but that hardly stops anything. He raises his arms. Holding them up, in fact, like he’s at gunpoint. Where’d this come from. “Don’t get upset, I’m fine.”

“Ha! Good one, sapling. Who’s upset, exactly?” Bill says, teeth bared, and in a deeply upset way. He tugs Dipper’s shirt, up, fingers tracing the cut before pressing into his stomach. “I’m just wondering if I need a replacement mortal this soon into your miserable existence. No big deal!”

Okay, this is too much. 

Dipper struggles up, despite Bill trying to shove him down again. Bracing himself on the cave wall, and glaring. “Calm down already.”

“I’m perfectly calm.” Bill says, through gritted teeth. At best he looks miffed, but he’s at least stopped trying to make Dipper lie down in the recovery position or whatever. With a glare, he tugs up Dipper’s shirt, prodding at the shallow cut. “What the hell, kid. I thought you said it hurt!”

“Ow.” Dipper’s stomach jumps at another poke. He smacks Bill’s hand away. “It does, alright? Quit poking.”

Bill doesn’t seem impressed. His fingers trail over the larger, older scar on Dipper’s left side, then glares at Dipper’s stomach like it’s insulted him. A beat, then - “You don’t usually complain.”

“I-” Okay, true. Dipper glares anyway. “Shut up.” 

He doesn’t complain because it’s the only option. For all that Bill whines and teases and taunts Dipper, all the time, about being some ‘fragile mortal meatsack’, already rotting before his eyes, he really doesn’t like it when it’s brought forcefully to his attention. 

God, he shouldn't have said anything. Ninety-five percent of the time, there isn’t any harm to mention. But when Dipper does ends up showing he is kind of… mortal, and it’s small, he just. Doesn’t bring it up. For all that they bicker all the time, he doesn’t like to make Bill upset.

Bill grunts, mouth turned down at the corners. He stands up quickly, folding his arms. His lip curls up in a sneer. “If you wanted attention, kid, there are way better ways to-”

Oh, fuck that. Dipper flips him off, and starts storming off. 

God, this is stupid. Whenever Dipper ever breaks a bone or something, he gets teased about being so weak and vulnerable. Which he is, but neither of them like the reminder. 

These days, it also comes with some weirdly maybe-sincere ‘kiss it better’ thing that Dipper then has to disinfect. A lot of hovering, and rambling commentary. Sometimes creative descriptions of how much worse it could have been, and Dipper never needed those, at any time. Bill gets oddly fixated on such random little moments, and it’s just -

Dipper doesn’t like it, is all. Bill gets the way he gets, it’s a lot, and it’s easier just to avoid it. If he were a different guy - a human guy, or even mostly-human monster- Dipper might try to talk to him about it.

But Bill’s a demon. Not normal, barely sane even on his best days, and worse, he’s Bill, so. That conversation would go precisely nowhere.

Behind him, he hears said demon approaching, fast. Stupid jerk. He should be as tall as his real form. That’d be fair. More accurate, too, and then Dipper could properly stomp off without Bill catching up so easily.

Already the bastard is by Dipper’s side. A tall, irritating presence. Hovering close without grabbing on, which adds to said irritation. 

Dipper leans away, but Bill catches him around the waist and drags him in.

“Don’t get so grumpy, sapling, you’re fine! A little nick in the outer layer rarely killed anyone since they invented antibiotics.” Though he pinches Dipper’s cheek, he yanks his head away with a grunt. Bill sighs. “Everything’s a-okay here! Looks like I don't have to find a replacement just yet.”

Bill’s an idiot. Dipper scoffs, though an unpleasant feeling crawls in his gut. “Oh yeah? Who would you replace me with?”

“Eh, not like I got anyone specific in mind.” Bill waves that off, nonchalant. “But I have options! Lots of options.” He bumps a hip against Dipper. “Keep that in mind before you go charging off into obvious traps.”

This goddamn liar. Dipper  elbows him in the side, because the asshole deserves it. 

Not that Dipper’s worried, or anything. From what little he’s heard of Bill’s exes in the demonic rumor mill - Bill’s been, as they say, less than successful. Already Dipper’s outstripped his longest by years.. Bill can lie day in and day out about his options, put on a brave face - but they both know he’s not going to find this again. Not easily. 

“Good luck finding another husband, asshole.” Dipper says with appropriate derision. It’s annoying that Bill even brought it up. There’s a good riposte in there, somewhere - but while his brain is coming up with an insult, his mouth runs on automatic. “But I was really worried that you would last week. I couldn’t stop thinking about it all day until you sent a dick pic. It was weirdly comforting.”

Bill turns toward him with genuine surprise. He even blinks a few times, no retort emerging, and Dipper looks back at him with equal surprise. 

Until his mind catches up with what he just said. 

Dipper digs his heels in the ground, slamming to a halt. Clapping both hands to his mouth, eyes wide.

Beside him Bill nearly trips at the sudden stop, flailing for balance with a swear.

Shit, shit shit. Dipper really didn’t mean to say that. He knows Bill’s not looking around, that he’s not interested. Cynically, that he couldn’t manage it if he was. Last week was just a one-off anxiety, like all the others Dipper’s brain comes up with when it gets too much free time. Totally irrational, and really hard to stop fixating on.

Bill keeps staring. Not angry, just confused, for long enough that Dipper wants to shrink into the ground and melt into nothingness. 

Then he asks, “What the hell, Pine Tree?” 

“I don’t know! I don’t know why I thought that. I don’t know why I said that.” Dipper cringes into himself, grimacing and ducking his head. He runs a hand over his slightly sweaty face. “I didn't even want you to know I got hurt.” 

At that, Bill snorts. “Oh, please. I’d have seen that first time I got your shirt off. You can’t keep secrets from me!” 

Dipper folds his arms, internally seething - and his stupid mouth moves to say,  “I’ve done it before.” 

This time, the silence is tense.

Dipper wipes his sweating forehead again, not daring to meet Bill’s eye. God he shouldn't have -

Before he can think, he blurts out, “I think something’s wrong.” 

“Probably!” Bill agrees, with a smile just a little too sharp. He takes Dipper’s face in both hands, eye narrowed. “Hold still a sec.”

As Bill’s eye flickers blue, and the magic between them surges -  Dipper squirms a bit, but. Well. If anything’s wrong with him - magically, anyway - Bill’s the best one to diagnose it..

Bill tilts his head to one side, then the other. After a moment, his mouth twists up into something unpleasant, eye glowing slightly brighter for an instant.

Then he sighs, and lets Dipper go. His expression is neutral, except for the slightest downturn of his mouth. His lips part like he’s about to speak, then twist up into a grimace.

Uh oh.

Whatever Bill saw, he didn’t like it.

“What?” Dipper pats his head, then his chest. If there was something weird, magically about him, he - wouldn’t be able to tell, actually. He’s too close to get a good look. Oh god, what if he did hit his head too hard, and something in his brain is bleeding, or worse. “Wait. Am I dying?”

“Worse! You’re telling the truth.” Bill claps his hands together. Though he’s smiling again, it’s brittle and annoyed. “Don’t suppose you know any curse breakers that aren’t your great-uncle?”

“Not really,” Dipper admits. Bill's words catch up to him, and he bites his lip. Then, because the situation deserves it, “Fuck.”

Protection curse. The tablet.

Damn it.

A part of a horde, from a long time ago. Messed with. It should have been something less awful. Like warts, or sprouting plants from his skin, or a big fireball. Pretty much anything else would be less awful.

Truth curses are rare, they’re difficult as hell - but judging by the words spilling out of Dipper, he’s caught a pretty strong variant.

Of all the curses that could hit him. Why this one.

Hell, maybe it’s intended to be the worst curse possible for the ‘thief’. That would explain how targeted this feels. 

And knowing Dipper’s luck, that part was explained on, like, the back of the tablet.

“Welp! Good thing I’m not short on contacts, kid.” Bill grapes his shoulder, shaking him a bit, before he trails an arm over Dipper’s shoulders. “Who wants some fumbling idiot uncle to fix this kinda spell, anyway?”

Dipper would! If it was feasible. He makes a brief attempt at shrugging Bill’s arm up before letting his shoulders slump.

The idea of Ford hearing about this is….

Dipper sucks in a breath through his teeth.

Ford really would have a way around this. He'd certainly have the best intentions, Dipper’s certain. He'd...

Also not have the best sense of boundaries.

Though he'd be doing it for the right reasons, he'd ask the wrong questions. Out of concern, and arguably valid worry; he's never fully believed that Bill can't influence him. Despite how many times Dipper’s tried to explain it to him, Ford just can’t wrap his mind around certain truths.

With this curse, though. Between poor social sense, the Pines curiosity, and what Dipper might blurt out, while compelled to answer - 

On this, Dipper agrees with Bill. They’ll have to find something else to break this.

In the meantime, he’ll manage, like he has all the other times his life has sucked. Hardly the worst case scenario. If Bill had been cursed - someone who lies like he breathes -  Who knows? Give it a few days, and he might just explode from all the backed up bullshit.

“Wait.” A horrible thought strikes. Dipper reels on his husband, eyes wide. “Are you okay?”

“What, me? I’m a perfectly moral human man,” Bill says, resting a hand on his chest, lifting his chin with pride. “A boring sentient mammal who’s never found curses entertaining.” 

Yep, Bill’s fine. As always, it’s Dipper who gets the short end of the stick. 

He breathes in slowly, and lets it out. 

Yeah. Still sucks. He’ll deal. Cursed, but not dead. In danger, but not the worst - and his husband’s being annoying, which means he’s perfectly fine. There’s a solution too - it’s just going to be a huge, annoying process getting to it. 

“So,” Bill says, slowly. Drawing the word out in a long string, while he finger-walks his arm up around Dipper’s shoulder.

Uh oh.

Speaking of annoying…

“Watch it,” Dipper hunches his shoulders, not daring to look his idiot husband in the eye. “You’re this close to sleeping on the couch for a month.” Not a big enough threat, Bill’s still thinking- “Or for a year.”

“Oh, sure,” Bill says, in a distracted tone. His fingers pause on their walk, one ‘leg’ poised on Dipper’s clavicle. They hold the position for a long moment, tapping out a little marching step - and seconds later, his palm slaps down on Dipper’s shoulder. “So, Pine Tree! How do you feel about this ‘Bill Cipher’ guy?”

Though Dipper resists, and he really tries to, the words slip out past his teeth, his lips form the sounds -

“I love you.” God. Damnit. He clenches his fists, as Bill’s sheer smugness radiates from him like heat. “And I’m thinking about shoving you off a cliff right now.”

When Bill paused, Dipper thought he might have fended this off. Wishful thinking, really, Bill’s almost impossible to stop. Dipper used what leverage he had, but all he’s managed to avoid are the worst, most invasive questions.

When it comes to Bill, that’s pretty close to a win.

Not that it’s going to feel like one.

Bill has, in fact, been encouraged. Now that he’s heard something he likes, he leans in like a weird creep. Dipper can practically hear the leer in his voice. “And on a scale of one to ten, how handsome am I?

“Ten point five,” Dipper needs to loosen his jaw or he might break a filling. Being pumped for information is bad enough without pumping up Bill’s already ridiculous ego. “You bastard.” 

Bill’s chest puffs out, there’s a strut in his stride. The grin is so wide now Dipper’s pretty sure it should hurt- and if he dares to pucker up, he’s not getting lips on his awful face.  “And am I the most clever and sexually amazing guy in the universe or what?

This time, Dipper snorts. 

“Definitely not.” He ignores the sharp, indignant sound next to him, tilting his head in thought. “For one, there’s succubi and incubi, so. Sexually, you’re not even on top amongst demons.” He glances over at the offended ‘o’ of Bill’s mouth. “And I know you’re not the most clever, because I win our debates nearly half the time. Maybe you’re up there, but not the most. And that’s just the surface level stuff.”

Dipper doesn’t have a complete cosmological view of the multiverse, but he has learned a lot. Mostly stuff he picked up from his husband, and demonic gossip. It’s absolutely enough to go on a long, long ramble about how Bill most likely doesn’t rank number one in anything. If Dipper avoids the topics where he actually is.

He’s barely fifteen seconds in before Bill starts scowling, with a grumpy hunch to his shoulders - But screw him. 

Dipper starts smiling, just a bit. Then, to be a dick, he adds, 

“The ten and a half is just me, anyway. To the average human, you’re maybe an eight..” Dipper continues, over another spluttered protest. Again, true; not everyone likes the slightly inhuman maniac cyclops look. “Six with your personality.” 

Bill groans. “Ugh, you pedant.” He squeezes Dipper’s shoulder, jostling him slightly. “C’mon, you know what I meant! What’s the real - “

“Don’t ask questions if you can’t handle the answers,” Dipper warns, jabbing Bill in the chest. So far it hasn’t been too much, but it could be. Time to draw a line. “I will suck so much fun out of this for you.” 

Bill Cipher, unintentional teacher once more. Now Dipper knows the curse isn’t about perfect truth. When he can deliberately misinterpret a question’s intent, and can go on tangents  - that means he has loopholes. There might even be more, if he tries.

And if they can’t get this settled soon, he’ll need every one of those he can find.

“Clever brat.” Bill’s frowning, but he can’t disguise the amusement in his voice. His eyebrows wiggle, his arm hauling him close -  "Go ahead, then. Anything else you wanna share?"

"I know two and half ways to kill you, Bill Cipher." Dipper gets right up in his face. He won’t let Bill push this any further. "Don't tempt me to use them."

Being face to face like this, Dipper watches Bill’s eye go wide - ha, didn’t expect that, did he. With that threat, he’ll - 

Start cackling. And weirdly, turn a little pink. Dipper feels all the momentum he had whoosh out of him like sad balloon animal. 

“Boy, you are a saucy one!” Bill whistles, low. He places his hands demurely on his cheeks, fluttering his eye at Dipper with amusement. “Oh, yeah. Talk deadly to me.”

By this time, Dipper figures he should be used to stumbling into demonic flirtation. Only it turns out it’s basically fractal in nature, and he keeps running into new and newer edge cases.

“Fun as this is - we gotta get you cleared up, and no time like the present!” Bill’s calmed down enough to scoop an arm around his waist, leading Dipper onward. “Can’t have you babbling everything to everyone, y’know?”

“What, you don’t want me telling you everything?” Total bullshit. Dipper elbows him in the side. “I thought you wanted to get in my head.”

“Hey! I didn’t ask for our game to be set on ‘beginner’ mode. That’s boring.” Bill flicks his fingers - but he’s got his ‘evading questions’ look on. “You’re lucky I’m so- oof.”

Another elbow, harder this time. Bill grunts, but capitulates. Rubbing at his eye briefly, he sighs.

“So! How many of my secrets would you say you know, Pine Tree?” Bill tightens his grip on Dipper’s waist, tugging him closer. “And I’m talking about the ones that I wouldn’t enjoy getting out in the world.”

“More than I can count.” Dipper says without thinking. Then, with thinking -  “Oh.”

Dipper hadn’t considered how much Bill’s taught him, before this exact moment. How much he’s learned. Even unintentionally. Especially unintentionally. 

Crap, even his threat before was kind of - 

Shit. There’s definitely, absolutely, no way can they go to Ford about this. Total recipe for disaster.

“See? We both got liabilities in play here.” Bill moves easily as Dipper picks up the pace. If anything he’s amused, and not feeling nearly as urgent. Another reason he’s an idiot. “All we gotta do is get you patched up quick, and no more loose lips sinking ships! Easy-peasy.”

“It better be,” Dipper mutters. Nothing ever goes right for him. And by extension, them.

“Trust me, kid! I got this handled!” Bill snaps his fingers - and smacks Dipper’s butt with a wink. “I know some guys!”

[ghost-ghost-baby]

We're Just Friends! (Omega!bakugo x alpha!reader x omega!Izuku) pt. 3/?

Pt. 1 / / pt. 2

A/n: cannot believe we made it to pt. 3 I’m sksksksksk,,,, they finally get together! Pt 4/5 will b them all together and adjusting and then it’ll b readers bday so 👀👀

Lore: Once an Alpha reaches 21 they get their first rut, they’d either already have their mates or the rut will act as a push for them to get together and bond.

Summary: Reader and Katsuki have been friends for years, and everyone expects them to get together, until reader rescues an omega that lives in their building, and things get a touch more... complicated

Warnings: swearing, omegaverse, mad pining, Katsuki get exposed for going to therapy lmao, Izuku is kinda a shithead, Katsuki b mad insecure, reader is still dumb- everyone except for Izuku is bad at feelings

The two of you had gotten sidetracked, really quickly, it wasn’t even twenty minutes before you were putting a horror video on the tv. That was almost an hour ago, and you were about to doze off now, laying on your back with your head on the arm rest, Izuku right on top of you with his head tucked under your chin. You didn’t know how you got into this position, but you weren’t complaining, it was… nice. Perfect, almost, but something still felt like it was missi-

“Y/n- why the fuck are our stupid friends asking me about your new- Deku?” Katsuki burst through the door, already yelling, and his scent took on a burnt tinge that almost had you gagging when he slammed the door behind him.

“Kacchan! I didn’t realise you were Y/n’s roommate!” Izuku perked up almost immediately, sitting up so he was straddling you with his eyes fixed right on Katsuki.

“Wait, you two know each other-“ You tried to sit up, barely managing to turn your head to see Katsuki, Izuku was stronger than he looked, and he obviously didn’t want you moving-

“Yeah we go way back, childhood friends, right Kacchan?” Izuku’s tone was light, but you couldn’t see the feral look on his face from where you were trapped on the couch.

“Right… that doesn’t explain what the fuck you’re doing here, Deku.” Katsuki snarled, and Izuku giggled at the blonde. What the fuck kinda thing were you stuck in the middle of-

“What does it look like, Kacchan? We’re courting now! And Y/n’s already been such a good alpha, I’m surprised you didn’t ask them-“

“What does he mean you’re courting?” Katsuki’s tone was something you’d never heard before, and your heart twinged at it. “Get the fuck off of them Deku.” He walked closer to the couch, until he could grab onto your arm and haul you off, Izuku sliding back to the couch and pouting.

“He asked me on the way home and I accepted-“ Katsuki’s heart sank, he’d been too late? “I didn’t think you’d care, aren’t you courting Kiri?” Your scent was far too comforting, and the way it accompanied Izuku’s had Katsuki feeling something he definitely didn’t want to. Deku was a stalker! A creepy little nothing stalker! With great hair- no! And you looked so cute when you were confused like this-!

“Katsuki, are you okay?” You waved your hand in front of his face, and the blonde only let out another snarl. What if you found out about what he’d done to Deku, you’d never look at him the same, and from the way Deku was smirking the bastard knew it too.

“Whatever- I’m fucking going to bed.” Katsuki pushed past you, and you could only gawk as he disappeared down the hall and into his room.

It wasn’t supposed to go like this, you were meant to be with him, it had been the two of you for years! Why were you such a fucking idiot! Katsuki was fuming even as he hugged the pillow he’d stolen from your room, how dare Deku come back and steal you! Still, the nagging thought that coming back to the two of you… had felt like home wouldn’t get out of his head and it was only making him angrier.

“Katsuki? Izuku went back to his apartment, do you have any requests for dinner?” Your voice floated through his door and Katsuki opened his mouth to respond on instinct. No, if you wanted to be with Deku so badly you clearly didn’t care about him, and so he would stop caring about you.

“Katsuki? Please come out, I don’t understand why you’re upset but I want to.” You tried to keep the desperate tone out of your voice. It didn’t work, and Katsuki was biting the inside of his cheek to stop himself crooning in an attempt to calm you down.

“Okay… I’ll uh, just be in my room if you want to talk.”

This was getting out of hand, it was like you were living with a ghost. It had been three days of Katsuki ignoring you, three days of no contact whatsoever, and even though you had Izuku, and he was just… amazing, it still felt like something was missing. You actually didn’t think you’d gone this long without talking to Katsuki in- well since the two of you had met. But, it was finally the weekend, you’d have to run into him at some point, and then you could finally talk, even if he didn’t feel like it.

You were pulled into Izuku’s apartment before you could even knock, the omega giving you a deep kiss before quickly tugging you into a hug and rubbing his cheek over your scent gland.

“I missed you, Y/n! What took so long?” Izuku only pulled away when he couldn’t smell anything except you, and pride filled him when he saw you were wearing his sweater.

“Sorry Bub, I was trying to get Katsuki to talk to me but he’s still giving me the silent treatment.” You shrugged as he walked you over to the couch, something already playing in the background, and Izuku pushed you down without hesitation. You let the omega position you how he wanted, wasting no time wrapping your arms around him once Izuku settled down next to you with his head on your chest and your legs tangled together.

“You know… it does seem like he likes you, maybe you could suggest a triad? I know I wouldn’t object.” Izuku’s tone was so nonchalant you’d expected him to ask what you wanted to watch, not suggest bringing Katsuki into the relationship.

“You’d be okay with that? Really?” You hadn’t even considered that, you felt kinda stupid, honestly. Why hadn’t you- oh, right.

“I think he’s courting someone else, actually, I’m sure that’s why he’s being so weird.” You pushed any hope you had down when you remembered how much time Katsuki actually spent with Kirishima, and how close they seemed to be.

“If you say so, but I wouldn’t write the idea off, Kacchan’s always been good with surprises.” Izuku shifted to press a kiss to your scent gland, before he grabbed the remote and returned his attention to putting on a show.

It was Sunday, you hadn’t seen your roommate all weekend, this really wasn’t going how you planned. A sigh left you as you pushed open the door to your apartment, you’d been with Izuku for most of the day, and you were so, so ready to just go to sleep. You’d been exhausted for the last few days, and Denki kept commenting about how snappy you were and asking why your scent was ‘so weird man’ when the three of you had met for lunch. It was sweet how much they cared, but annoying as fuck nonetheless. You were wide awake outside your door though, almost missing the sweet caramel smell that leaked out until you had your hand on the handle. Your room didn’t usually smell like that, not unless-

“Katsuki-? What’s going on?” You pushed open the door to a very, very startled Katsuki, like a deer in headlights, really, and your confusion only grew when he was holding onto an armful of your clothes. “You could have just asked if you wanted something for your nest, but isn’t Kiri helping with that?” You closed the door behind you, and Katsuki’s eyes darted from you to the door. Fuck, you weren’t supposed to be home for another twenty minutes, you’d usually spend at least two hours at Deku’s place, why the fuck had you come back so early? Katsuki clutched the clothes tighter against his chest as neither of you spoke, you really still thought he was with shitty hair when all he really wanted was you?

“Katsuki? This is ridiculous- what’s going on with you? Why won’t you talk to me?” You stepped forward and Katsuki growled when you got within a foot of him, the sound setting you on edge and making you release a growl of your own on instinct.

“We’re gonna talk about this, I’m not letting you ignore me anymore, it sucks! It feels like there’s a piece of me missing-!” You stepped forward with every word, flinching at yourself when you heard your voice crack at the end.

“What does any of that matter? You have Deku now, the two of you are perfect together, you don’t need me anymore!” Katsuki yelled back, everything that happened the last day and the confused puddle that the state his feelings were in finally bubbling over. It was too much, he’d barely seen you and now here you were, reeking of Deku of all people, and accusing him of liking someone else.

“How could you say that? I need you, Katsuki-! I always need you! These last few days have been hell without you! It’s bad enough I have to deal with you courting Kiri, but now you don’t even talk to me and I don’t understand what’s going on!” Tears kept welling up in your eyes, and Katsuki dropped the pile of clothes on the floor, his hands balling into fists by his side.

“Because I don’t know- I don’t know what the fuck I’m feeling!” Katsuki’s voice broke, and you barely had time to open your mouth before he continued. “I thought that we- that we were set in stone, and then I come back to you and fucking Deku on the couch and fuck that hurt! But it fucking- it fucking felt like home, and all I wanted to do was join you and I don’t understand why!” He turned around to wipe his eyes, and your jaw hit the floor as you tried to process. He wasn’t… courting Kiri…?

“You’re such an idiot- you couldn’t just tell me this?” Exasperated didn’t even begin to cover how you felt.

“How could I say anything? I was horrible to Deku in school because I couldn’t deal with my feelings, why would either of you want to be with me after how awful I’ve been?” There was no anger in Katsuki’s tone anymore, and the guilty scent he was putting out was just putting you on edge.

“You regret it though, don’t you? And I know you’ve worked really hard to be better, and you even go to therapy now-“ Katsuki snarled at the last part, he hated whenever you brought up therapy, but at least you weren’t yelling.

“We actually talked it over and… Izuku and I both like the idea of a triad with- well with you, if you wanted.” You reached out to grab Katsuki’s shoulder, though he refused to look you in the eye when you turned him to face you. You had to be lying, you had to, you couldn’t mean that and he didn’t want to get his hopes up for nothing.

“Katsuki, you gotta talk to me, I can’t read your mind.” Your cards were all out on the table now, and your anxious scent was a dead giveaway to your feelings. What if you’d ruined everything? What if you’d gotten everything wrong- you were never good at guessing-

“You’re being serious? This isn’t some kind of payback?” Red eyes finally met yours and you could only nod, you still got caught of guard by how pretty he was. “Okay, I’ll join your shitty fucking triad.”

Taglist (pls lemme know if any of em r wrong)

@pasteldaze @hopeless-ro-simptic @ntngann @somerandominternetgirl-blog @ianem005 @lalaluvzen @antisocial-minnie @rogueofbullshit @hakunamatatayqueen @so-uncute @therealwalmartjesus @unlightedfool @all-the-kings-reblogs @cth-l

[vryivs]

she really sees right through his big boy act its so cute

yanqing acquires a new parental figure every patch that he's in. obsessed

"thank GOD i dont have to somehow maintain a one person polycule"

she makes a good point. yet another w for my beautiful daughter whose companion mission i still havent played

lingsha POV!

do not fear, team cunt are here

btw it causes me sympathetic pain seeing hanya's chest plate be a cup size too small. imagine the chafing. jesus. i <3 practical fantasy armour

his voice is so much softer talking to these guys i love 孙晔. his line delivery literally never disappoints. also look at him.

exact right vibe. perfect casting.

help i went to gush over his talent and found out he's also voiced wu xie? remarkable. what a man.

also jing yuan is GUILTY the way he speaks to dan heng (former prisoner) and lingsha (former prisoner). he's like teddy after he tears up a pair of shoes and gets told off

h. hello?

ok well i am definitely finding out what that is about

oh its just more sanctus medicus stuff. nevermind. i wanted to see jing yuan transform into a catboy but i guess not all dreams can come true

jing yuan likers how are we feeling getting explicit confirmation that this man is soaked in trauma

GET HIS ASS

he's so nice about it. good. he better be

the framing of this shot is so funny.

anyway, i kind of really like how this is handling the shackling prison. like it was obvious (to me at least) that it wasn't going to be an 'oh there are flaws but its a good system' because dan heng exists. seeing them really emphasise that the shackling prison is based out of a real desire to enact vengeance, rather than to dish out just punishment is great

the xianzhou alliance and its politics are so appealing to me. they arent trying to tell us 'hey this is a good system.' theyre letting it exist and letting us witness it ourselves and make our own minds up (which i think is why despite having the same rating the honkai games feel more mature than genshin--i struggled playing genshin with how it seemed always to explain how the good guys are morally pure even if their actions suggest otherwise)

yeah that sounds like fu hua (affectionate)

---------> imbibitor lunae

she will NOT let him catch a break omg. i love her

NO FREAKING WAY

omg omg omg. dan heng lore??? the fact he has the memories isnt an inherent botched rebirth thing he was literally experimented on. thats crazy

no wonder jing yuan is the most understanding about dan heng's relationship to his past if he knew this all along

jing yuan is so dramatic dropping this lore all while looking like this :3

mf you could have said this back when dan heng was having a crisis at jingliu's reunion party and yet

i love lingsha. girl was enjoying her grudge and now she's gotta let it go. devastated for her

lingsha's plan is great she is. god i cant think of the word but she is so venomous. so conniving. thank GOD she's on our side because her mind is created to light fire under everyone's asses. she does NOT pull her punches. no nonsense girlboss.

youre so obsessed with him it makes you look stupid

ok that is quite fucked up. infact

everything he says just makes her sound better and better

i am in love with this woman

i am so so so in love with this woman