#things of my life nobody asked for

[racky000]

April killing the toughests 💀

[inkskinned]

you know, you know. no gods, no masters, no kings on pedestals. everyone is fallible. death of the author. you know! you are balanced about your intake of media - you allow the wiggle room, the grace, the gratitude, the skepticism. nobody above criticism.

but still. a weird gut-punch feeling, something akin to betrayal. you read the article. surprise! an author you love is actually: a serial fucking predator.

well, shit. what now. no, you knew he was a person (all people are), but now you're wondering - what have i overlooked by accident? what messages have i internalized that are strange and cruel? and also, like, what the fuck?

his actions lay a thick glaze on top of everything. like each place is now ruined, opaque in a new way. but okay, fine, you've done this before. you knew better, right? you've been betrayed by many a cherished childhood author.

still, this stickiness. fuck. can you pick up that book again. will you read it to your children. you've recommended it to others - will you ever do that again? and of course, of course, no parasocial relationships. you were theoretically above this kind of sentiment. but the artist informs the art, right.

so it's not something as clear-cut as feeling he owed you, specifically (a stranger) better behavior - just that you kind of, in a distant and odd way... sort of trusted him to do better. it's not like a real trust or something speakable, just the faint hope that the product (good books) was a thin representation of the soul. now it feels like the product (good? books?) was a mask. in some small or insignificant way, your previous support of this person lent them power. your money and your time and your laughter.

and the thing is - you have this terrible, echoing sensation. how many times will this happen? over and over. you find out that the singer you love is actually a predator. you learn over drinks that your favorite high school english teacher is in jail for what he did to her. you listen to the news idly and suddenly discover that a woman you used to idolize has been abusing her kids for an actual eon.

what can you touch without the static melting off. you can't even really complain about it too much (you were supposed to know better, and besides, you don't want the same re-split "it's not your fault, love what you love" basic advice), but now it's here. somehow, it feels like - you let him into your life.

it's not that things need to be pure or an artist has to be like, endlessly perfect, mindful. demure. it's more just this terrible truth that has been replayed through your veins so often it feels criminally vain. power corrupts, absolute power corrupts absolutely. did you want any one person to be worth that power?

it's just that he wrote books where he seemed to understand that. he seemed to know about hierarchies and unfair systems and bigotry and privilege. you thought they were books about what it means to struggle. you thought they were about having power and still using it for good rather than for control. he spooned you a narrative of being a good guy, a kind soul. you fucking bought what that fucking monster sold.

maybe that's why they were fantasies, after all.

[shima-draws]

Just got back from seeing Sonic 3 and HOOOOOOLY SHIT y’all. Oh my fucking god. OH my god. Ohhhh my g o d

[racky000]

YIPPEEEEEE🎉

I don't have anyone to tag 😔

Thanks tho, I liked it 😻

Psst hey.. over here

I love this picrew so much!! It makes me so happyyyy!! If anyone would like to start a reblog chain that'd be nice. Just don't tell @whipped-cheese that I'm awake. I'm kinda supposed to be slumbering rn.

@pasteldragonstuff @unpaidchildsupportt @immorbiuszguyguy @alexluminosbucket @ghosteii @miss-night @penguins-dragons @ryobitheaxololt @snake-legs2244 and anyone else who has found this and wants to join

[ghxst-bird]

He once made the mistake of joking about taking a dive into a lake because he’d been craving fish, saying he’d give anything for one right then.

Sukuna didn��t even pause before jumping right in. And only then did Yuji find out that the boy didn’t even know how to swim.

He can still feel the sharp, visceral terror of seeing those flailing limbs going under without a sound, the stream of bubbles rising to the surface as he’d stared, dumbfounded, before realizing that Sukuna wasn’t coming back up.

Yuji cried so hard after fishing the boy out of the water that Sukuna awkwardly started patting his head in consolation.

— sneak peek of “Fragilely, Gradually”, pt ii of the Ouroboros verse ✨

[dormiloncito]

OH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[carlottastudios]

Every day I get closer to making an unhinged behemoth of a post listing all of the things about Kaeya and his possible connections to mythology & stuff that I notice but NOBODY ELSE SEEMS TO BRING UP IN THEIR THEORIES

(edit: OMG I reached the tag limit I'm so sorry)

[langfield]

This is a pretty dumb question, but you're an interesting person so I'd like to see your perspective on it. I realize people tend to give flack to people in the fandom who enjoy games made by Deck Nine, due to their games usually suffering from the same issues and because the studio itself has the Nazi and sexual harassment allegations ehich are of course problematic. I don't think people who like DE and True Colors deserve harassment, you and other people definitely don't deserve harassment. If anything you seem to have far more grace and give it to far more than other people have. I guess I'm really wondering how do you go about navigating the conversation that is Deck Nine? Do you think it's s good idea to seperate the art and the artist, or do you have an alternate interpretation of it?

hello! thank you so much for the question ( which is not at all dumb, by the way! ), because i think deck nine’s mistreatment of employees is important to address whether one likes their lis games or not. i’ll preface this by saying that i rarely ever get involved in behind the scenes production for medias i consume, mostly because it never enriches or devalues the experience for me. there are, of course, interesting things to discern from the creators ; you can easily find out why maybe the latter half of a story fell flat, or why certain characters disappeared, and a bunch of fun little details like that … but that extra knowledge is merely icing on the cake for me, rather than a part of the cake itself. while the people behind a game are important, i’ve always put more weight into my own interpretation of events, which can either align with author’s intent or not. to me, media is always what you personally make of it, and as a very queer person in an extremely straight world ( whose opinions hardly mesh with fanon takes held as gospel ), i’m used to crafting my own stories within works that aren’t exactly what was meant to be displayed. don’t get me wrong! i’m well aware of the canons i indulge in! i can easily find out what a lis game was trying to accomplish ( given how unsubtle said games are ) i just might add my own spin or flavor to it. i think everything ever made exists to be interpreted in multiple ways : so pouring over companies and the conditions behind them aren’t exactly on my to-do list.

however, i am well aware of deck nine’s mistreatment of employees. i’ve read articles discussing true color’s shitshow and i follow a former double exposure writer who was laid off, one who has no qualms complaining about it and the impossible work conditions they were under. it is all very bad and very true, and that deserves to be acknowledged. anytime i defend double exposure ( or before the storm, or true colors ) i am never defending deck nine as a company! i do not care for deck nine like that, nor am i inclined to give them grace … the sympathy i give is always towards the actual employees, especially the writers of said games, whom fans are excessively cruel towards. it absolutely disgusts me when fans claim that the writers of de deserved to be fired before christmas because they did a ‘bad job’ -- when the reality is that the writers are phenomenal people who did their best to make a game and characters worth caring about. the flaws of double exposure is entirely based on how deck nine refused to let the writers breathe! they had to change the story seven thousand times because deck nine wasn’t happy, and because deck nine was betting on making a sequel, much to the dismay of said writers.

i, personally, do not understand people who hate before the storm, true colors, and double exposure simply because deck nine made it. while i support acquiring games illegally so as to not support corrupt companies, i think you should give these games a try regardless. many of the employees on deck nine who suffered through sexual harassment and general abuse have said that it brings them joy to see people love the games they worked on, or the characters they helped create. many have said that the writing that is praised in these games were decisions marginalized people on these writing teams fought for. the people deck nine has abused do care for the games they’ve created, and care for them passionately! :

the last two screenshots are rather important to me, as they prove that the writers do indeed understand the life is strange games and franchise. many claim they don’t, but they do! and they’re the ones who have fought to keep lis as lis as possible. they love these games and tried to do them as much justice as they were allowed. this is always important to understand, in my opinion.

so, where does that leave me? i think how i approach deck nine’s games is that i approach them as i would any other, out of respect to the employees who gave these games their all despite deck nine’s toxic environment. perhaps i’m far more lenient on the mistakes inherent in their games because i know the writers couldn’t make the games how they wanted, which would’ve probably be leagues better than the ones we got. i appreciate what these people fought to include ( like the topics of racism, empathy, and queerness ) and i condemn deck nine for what they’ve done, but i don’t condemn the poor employees for doing the best they could under impossible circumstances. their works are weak and aren’t even close to perfect, yet i find extremely enjoyable content within said works anyway. these employees have explicitly stated their thanks and desire for people to enjoy these games, so that’s what i shall do! it’s less of a ‘seperate the work from the author’ and more of a ‘the author isn’t just some soulless company, the author was people, queer and poc and otherwise, so it’s fine to acknowledge the abuse they faced while still connecting to their games as they have encouraged us to do.’ deck nine sucks. and maybe their lis games suck. but i find it more important to respect the victims behind the games who have made their opinions clear rather than feign activism by hating the games these victims poured their blood, sweat, and tears into, all while claiming i’m hating these games for said victims. that’s just my opinion, though! people can always do as they like, but this is how i deal with deck nine’s toxicity while also engaging with the lis titles they’ve created.

[ninyard]

god I am SO happy to be thinking about Towning again

[koka-mi]

They delayed magia exedra so they had more time to port it to consoles trust

[insipid-drivel]

Friendship and relationships are hard, I'm lonely and can't be loved by anyone, so here's some hard realities and wisdom from someone who's going to die sad and alone inevitably:

Many of you have got to try to put some effort in nurturing your relationships with your friends, or at least more clearly negotiate what your friends can and can't expect from you in the long-term.

Seriously, this whole 0-contact-aside-from-reacting-through-each-other's notes and proclaiming you're ride-or-die about someone for it? Is literally killing me. I've actually been dealing with suicidality because of how impossible it is to stay in touch with, or even on good terms with, people I thought were my friends but ghosted me, and then acted bewildered when I was angry with them for it or didn't acknowledge them as my friend anymore. "You can't be mad at me for not answering your DMs for 7 years! We're friends! I still reblog your reblogs!"

I am absolutely allowed to be angry, and I absolutely can demote you in my mind from "person I thought was a friend" to "mutual that ignores me until they need a dopamine fix or an answer to a specific question".

Months or years of unprompted, unbroken silence is not friendship - acquaintenceship, sure, but not friendship. It's a bad friend that expects love and loyalty by default no matter how long they've been ghosting their friends.

Love and loyalty are like a garden: they require cultivating and a commitment to nurture and grow, or else it gradually withers, and eventually dies. Earning the love and loyalty of a friend and then abandoning the garden of that relationship is how you find yourself locked out of your former friend's garden, or find them lonely, miserable, and exhausted from trying to keep the garden thriving when they themselves have slowly been dying inside because you haven't come back to the garden in years.

You have to learn to reach out and nurture your relationships. If you're autistic or otherwise have problems socializing, there are still some skills that you need to learn to avoid being isolated and friendless at the end of the day. Being autistic with trouble socializing is not an excuse to treat people you call your friends or that you claim to love like hobbies you can leave and come back to whenever you feel like - I learned this the hard way as an autistic person with shit social skills.

You have to negotiate what a friend can expect from you if you're an Outside Cat Friend that only drops in when you have specific reasons to reach out. It can be heartbreaking being the friend left waiting for a reply or a text without knowing the friend you're waiting for is an Outside Cat Friend.

Unless you have already agreed with your friend(s) that it's okay to ghost each other for extensive periods, spontaneously dropping out of contact with someone you've convinced is a good friend to you is really shitty and makes you a shitty friend.

"But I don't have the energy to reach out." Tell them.

"I have a lot going on and don't have time to talk." FUCKING TELL THEM.

"I haven't had anything to talk about." THAT'S WHAT FRIENDS ARE FOR.

"I've been too anxious to reach out." SAY THAT. JUST SAY THAT.

"I need a break from social contact for a while, so I don't wanna talk at all really." SAY THAT BEFORE YOU JUST DROP OFF THE END OF THE EARTH.

I've been the Reaching-Out Friend for most of my life, and in the past 5-10 years especially, I haven't been finding a whole lot of strength left to keep tending abandoned gardens that are thriving in name only. I've gotten fed up with self-professed friends that say they love me or view me as a sibling, but ultimately prove themselves to be bystanders when it's my turn to need someone to lean on and help me look after the garden.

Yes, there are absolutely friends you can have that can go years without hearing from you and still pick up where you left off when you do meet up again. They're awesome and worth keeping just as much as any other friends are.

There are also those friends that silently grieve your absence, that reach out to no avail, and wind up leaving the garden to die entirely after salting the soil with their own tears. Those are the friends that you've taken too much from without giving enough of yourself in return, and you've used them up and thrown them away without realizing you've treated someone that cared about you like a tool.

"I'm not the kind of friend that reaches out first."

That's your choice. No matter how you dress it up, when you decide it's time to neglect a friend, you're choosing to neglect them if they aren't prepared for what to expect from a friendship with you. You have the right to do that whenever you want to, but you cannot expect a warm reception with every person you do it to every time you do it. You cannot anticipate full amnesty in advance without full disclosure in advance.

If you're currently thinking of someone you've left sitting on read for a long time right now? It might be time to break your pattern and reach out for once.

Fall together, not apart.

[racky000]

I'm falling in love with this guy

[yellowocaballero]

"Come back to me when your work has invented new genders in the all-encompassing pursuit of toxic yaoi." so what do you think of omegaverse...

WHY WOULD YOU ASK ME, A NARNIA BLOG, THIS

[zlobonessa]

one aspect that always fascinates me about the witch cult is how much they are used-to-be humans-but-now-not-really-are. they were just people who sometimes were good in the way people are and sometimes were bad in the way people are. and then their lifes had been altered by powers so fundamentally that they just. lost touch with any humanity that they had. how do you comprehend being a hundreds years old? how do you comprehend being able to kill a human as simply as a mosquito? how do you comprehend being beyond time, beyond aging, beyond life and death, beyond your own body, beyond your own memories? it's a horror scenario accepted willingly, horror where instead of running from monster you shake its hand and convince yourself that that's all you ever wanted, because the alternative? the alternative is the existence so miserable you'd rather die than go back. the existence that may ask you to take responsibility for your actions, navigate your own life, change who you are as a person.

they cannot do that. they never could do that. they live for years and years, having powers to do literally anything and yet led by instructions in the book, further and further conservating in the state they were from a start, the moment they took a deal.

doomed from the beginning. never having a chance to escape. never wanting to escape, instead allowing your humanity to slowly seep away as a price for not bearing the weight of that it means to be human. damn.

[jrueships]

guess whos not going in at all this week, actually

[ox1-lovesick]

hi