#things are weird y’all

[iteh3xael]

Gonna need every person sub 20 on this Hellsite to disclose that way I know when I’m engaging with a Baby™️

[themoonunderstoodmydadjokes]

…..

A tipsy bathroom selfie for y’all ✨✨✨ (please be kind and respectful in your comments but also tell me I’m pretty 😌)

[the-great-horse-cocktail]

Alternate timeline where Stanley doesn’t accidentally ruin Ford’s project but he still doesn’t get into Geek Life University bc some kid showed up with a baking soda volcano

[oristian]

And when Azriel prays to the Mother, thanking her, before going down on Gwyn—who is of legal consenting age, considering she’s older than the current protagonists—what, then?

[hawkeyeslaughter]

hawkeye who makes jokes that are followed with an uncomfortable silence hawkeye that says awkward things a little too loud hawkeye who is over exaggerated and does childish things that anyone else would be embarrassed to be caught doing or be around and trapper who always catches his eye and smiles at every flat joke trapper who sometimes mouths things at the same time hawkeye says them because he knows him that well trapper who happily indulges in hawkeye’s silly shenanigans . i am sick . i am sick

[yuripira4e]

trying to explain to other otasune fans that snake is NOT the one with internalized homophobia in their coupling

[dekusleftsock]

I think that there’s a fundamental misunderstanding of what exactly is…happening with Izuku’s character. Specifically in regards to chapter 425.

I’m glad that a lot more people generally recognize that Izuku is not a character that can be read at a surface level, given that he’s both a repressed person with built up emotion of basically everything and also a very glaringly HUGELY unreliable narrator, but that doesn’t necessarily mean I agree with the ways I’ve seen this most recent chapter spoken about.

I see posts, comments, etc with ideas like “Izuku don’t suppress your emotions! Open up with people! It’ll be okay I promise!” When that’s fundamentally not what is happening here.

There’s always always ALWAYS been a distinct difference in character throughout horikoshi’s writing when he is showing that a character is:

A—Avoiding emotions, thoughts, ideas less than ideal for them. Not opening up when they probably should about their problems given that they’ve been handed the space to do so. Just genuinely not acknowledging, feeling, or expressing emotions that they don’t want.

B—Reflecting on the ways they feel about the world, themselves, or other people given their new perspective on a situation. Not outright reaching out to others to talk about these problems/feelings, but instead waiting until the moment they feel they have the most confidence to do so with their new outlook on their own life.

And genuinely, guys, to grab your BkDk attention rn, this is the exact reason why Ochako’s reflection on her feelings for Izuku and thereafter decision to pull away from them WAS NEVER GOING TO END IN OCHAKO EXPLODING WITH HER LOVE FOR HIM.

This was another common interpretation I saw of Ochako and Izuocha for a long time. That because she pushed these feelings away, they were somehow going to explode in this unbelievable way and she would “get the boy” because of it. That her arc would surround accepting her romantic feelings and that she can’t just push away how she feels for a career.

But yk. That didn’t happen. At all. Nowhere close even.

The same kind of goes for Katsuki, allmight, etc. They all had moments in their arc where it was spent genuinely reflecting, and the only reason we as the audience never connected it in the same ways we do ochako or Izuku was ALWAYS BECAUSE the narrative showed their inner thoughts while doing so (mostly because Allmight’s arc after losing OFA and Katsuki’s arc on what it means to be a hero were so intrinsically tied, both starting at the same time and ending at the same time during the final war. And because they were so tied this caused their own reflections, development, and thought process to be broadcasted to us frequently throughout their arcs… to each other. They also somewhat shared aspects with Izuku, but these were cherry picked more often than not, like dvk2 for example).

To us Katsuki never seemed to be.. idk, suppressing his anger in any way because we were always told what he was doing and why (side note: this is why I’ve always thought arguments against Katsuki were so weird, bc unlike characters like endeavor or Ochako he wasn’t like… hiding who he was and how he was changing. Ever. Like the audience knows at all times past basically season 3 what Katsuki is thinking and doing. Like how do you watch this happen, stare me dead in the eye, and tell me how much of a terrible and awful teenage boy he is. Like damn I didn’t think we were this dumb. This is also my theory as to why he’s most popular, his arc is very… in your face if that makes sense). Katsuki’s entire mini arc on reflecting his mistakes and his childhood and his future is spent TELLING YOU that it’s what he’s doing. (I’m referring mostly to the endeavor internship arc, the provisional license exam makeup, and basically everything in the war arc related to him leading up to bakugou Katsuki rising here)

And see, Horikoshi will stare you dead in the eye, tell you “this girl has taken into consideration that she doesn’t want to waste her time training her career focusing on a boy because he kinda caught her fancy”, and y’all will still say that this will explode in her face.

Y’all this is a series about learning how to manage emotions, maturity in relationship to one’s emotions, how to feel an emotion, but in a way that is helpful. Horikoshi isn’t telling you “go buck wild, feel everything all the time and always express it”, in fact he explores why you DONT do that! Through Toga or Shigaraki, they show how grief and anger can genuinely consume you. But he also shows why you shouldn’t just put everything in a box to never look at or acknowledge, or why you shouldn’t just let your grief destroy the world around you, or pretending that some emotions simply don’t exist.

I can’t say this enough, so let me say it now, mha is about the extremes of your psyche. That you should control something, but not too much. Everything can be harmful. Everything can be good.

Izuku is not controlling too much, he’s expressing just enough.

I LOVE shaming this dickhead at all times in all my posts. I love saying he’s an ignorant dipshit with a weird amount of distaste for a girl who just confessed to him. I’ve joked that chapter 348 is basically an entire chapter spent on Izuku calling Himiko a mean dyke. And yet I also believe he’s doing nothing WRONG here.

In fact, I’ll even say that this moment right here?

ISNT EVEN IZUKU DOING THE SOCIALLY APPROPRIATE THING ABOUT IT! But he’s still TRYING to reach out to someone he thinks MIGHT be able to understand. (And frankly, this moment is far deeper than what it’s being made out to be, to me it reads more like an unrequited friendship that Izuku both desires and has thought of them to have, while simultaneously showing the distance Ochako has successfully wedged between them for her own sake. Maybe it was always there though, maybe in weird, miscommunicated Horikoshi fashion, this is a representation of how Ochako always read all those “fun friend hangouts” as a little more than that, and without those feelings the friendship never really held any substance to her in the first place. Where Izuku saw his first real friend at UA, she saw little more than acquaintance)

Simultaneously, Izuku is genuinely reflecting on what it means for the world to change, to be a hero, to live after loss—and trying and failing to gain the connection he desires from individuals who can not and will not afford him that.

Izuku is ready for the world to change, a few select characters are also ready for the world to change (mirio, for example), but not nearly enough are. So maybe I’ll have to take this back if I’m proven wrong and I accidentally looked into this far past what everyone else did for no reason, but I genuinely believe with moments like this

And this

Aand this

That Izuku has come forward with that aspect of his character development. He’s reflecting on his new beliefs, not repressing his emotions for them.

[giddlygoat]

hater has disturbing reoccurring dreams about wander crawling inside his ribcage that always have him waking up in a cold sweat [they just feel too real and hater can’t place why]. wander has reoccurring dreams of hater ceremoniously destroying him with the Disaster Blaster and it’s the one dream he doesn’t eagerly blab to sylvia about because he doesn’t know how to tell her that it never feels like a nightmare. soooo is anyone else sick in the head or is it just me

[wanderinghedgehog]

There’s a little note I left in my copy of Les Mis that always makes me laugh because I would not fucking say that.

When did I write this?

[hiyyihrts]

if you are a Colin lover but anti Penelope OR vice versa a Penelope lover but anti Colin go ahead and just block me man I ain’t about seeing that shit on any of the tags for this pairing 😭😭 it’s weirdly obsessive behavior to make your entire blog or personality about hating a character when you could just not talk about that character/pairing if you don’t like them like you claim you don’t

[k1ttygam3r]

Wait people are still shipping Shadowvanilla? After this update?? I thought that was like. a joke

[sweetpapercroissant]

“dean winchester is a misogynist because he lies to women to get them to sleep with him and therefore clearly doesn’t respect them”

then you actually watch the show and every time dean sleeps with a woman he’s soft and there’s a gentleness even in his passion and he always makes sure his partner’s satisfied/comfortable and he does form genuine connections with the women he sleeps with even if he lies about his name and job (which is completely understandable and actually the sane thing to do considering most of america knows him as a serial killer and there’s not a lot of people around who’d bother talking to a guy who claims he hunts monsters for a living) (or for fun ig since there’s not a lot of ‘living’ in this profession) and he spends time getting to know them and offers the little bits of himself that he can and most of the time that dean has sex with a woman he sleeps over and they see him off in the morning with a goodbye kiss and genuine affection for him and if they ever run into him again they’re clearly fond and look back on their shared memories with satisfaction if nothing else and. this is the guy who doesn’t respect women? how? by believing they are adults who can want and enjoy a night of sex with no strings attached (something he’s always straightforward about btw)?? and more importantly it’s always consensual and they like him as a person and they’re clearly both enthusiastic about it (in fact there’s actually instances where dean isn’t completely enthusiastic but never the other way around).

also any time he’s been in a serious relationship where he was going to be a part of the other person’s life he tells them the whole truth, about hunting and monsters and his role in it and what being with him would entail. so i’d say he respects women just fine but maybe you need to seriously evaluate why you feel having casual sex with women is inherently disrespectful of them.

not to mention that the sex does mean something to him. even if he didn’t it wouldn’t be “wrong” or “misogynistic” to want to have sex with a woman without a relationship BUT. the sex does mean something to him. because he craves intimacy and human contact and affection and being liked and wanted and so often when he’s going through something he’ll open up to these women (jaime, anna) and they’re willing to listen to him without judgment and they’re gentle with him, with his grief, his trauma and the sex is a way for him to connect on a deeper level with them and it helps him and he’s spent almost his entire life isolated from society and can’t form long lasting relationships for much of his childhood and youth but he actually cares about them as human beings and he feels affection for them and it fulfills his desire for tenderness that he can’t expect from anyone else. and there’s nothing wrong with any of that.

[turkeycalamitybff]

on my stranger things bullshit again anyway

Holly being a major character this time???? I’ve got SO many things to say about that. Because she’s been foreshadowed to understand more than she’s letting on this ENTIRE TIME. Like I’ve seen no one talk about this but Holly def knows more than she’s letting on. And we’ve been shown that for so long. Look at season three episode seven “The Bite” around 2:50. When the other Wheelers are on the Ferris wheel Holly sees the trees moving, (the mindflayer) and comments on it. Like!!!! She has been in so many background scenes commenting to Karen about things from the upside down. And in season one she is the first one to see the “messages” from Will and the pressing on the wall. Will and Holly are TOTALLY connected. I was genuinely confused when she didn’t get a bigger role in season four but now it makes sense.

Will is what started the series but Holly will end it. And the Duffers legit said that they were paralleling season one (going back to those groups) so wouldn’t it make sense for ANOTHER CHILD CONNECTED TO MIKE WHEELER (who has been intimately connected to the plot each season I feel like) to go missing??? This is the WHEELERS season and no one can convince me otherwise. It’s all about learning that it’s good to be different. It’s about the WHEELER family learning that.

and it helps Karen get involved! Because in all the scenes Holly shows Karen something she could’ve just seen it herself. Holly was, objectively, a character that didn’t have to exist before now. But she does BECAUSE SHE IS CONNECTED TO THE UPSIDE DOWN. My guess is that she is heavily paralleled to Will this season (the title of chapter two one of the biggest examples) and is going to be the main catalyst and I for one am HERE FOR IT.

Will is the main character this season but the Wheelers are the ones who create the plot.

in general the Wheelers have always seemed to be huge. When the Cali gang gets back it would make sense for El to be at the front, correct? Or will? But no, Mike the one “leading the charge” it looks like. He really is the heart. When his sister goes missing?? Oh it’s over for Vecna.

also manifesting a scene after Holly goes missing for Mike to have a mental breakdown about the similarities to when Will was missing and Wills like so confused??? Like Dustin and Lucas see it too and they tell Will about how insane he went and Wills just. Shocked.

also manifesting a scene for the party (or everyone) where they find out what happened at the quarry with Troy in season one bc that was so built up? (Scene where hopper says that for someone to jump off was a death sentence) and then NOTHING happened and I need it to be addressed. Like maybe something similar happens and Dustin comments on it, and everyone finds out?? Just in general I can see how losing his younger sister could lead to Mike nearly committing suicide (that boy is SO depressed, Jesus) also I know this probably actually means nothing but I’ve always thought Holly was getting a bigger role since I saw the episode title “Holly, Jolly” like idk? It always seemed so weird to me and I always thought “oh hollys going to get bigger” and she never did? Also idk the episode title is just plain weird. Like I understand it’s like a play on the Christmas lights and ironic cause no one is happy but what always gets me is the comma. Like I would’ve thought they would’ve named it “Holly Jolly” which in my opinion makes more sense and is more continuos. Plus it wouldn’t bring Holly to mind as much and wouldn’t foreshadow her being part of it. BUT MAYBE they are going to parallel that episode and I won’t be crazy but who knows even. This last paragraph is me ranting.

tl;dr Holly and the Wheelers have been foreshadowed since season one to play a bigger role and to be connected to the upside down and we’re gonna see it in st 5.

[iheartmoons]

so many ‘non-misogynistic shameless fans’ view the male characters as one dimensional and get angry when u care about them too 💀💀 like just admit ur a man hater, no one will kill u for it

[soullessjack]

another offshoot of jack being infantilized is that it’s leeched into the popular mischaracterization of jack as some soft sensitive crybaby who hates violence, hates scary things and is super nice and sweet and cutesy all the time and of course he’s used to accessorize Claire as a big mean lesbian sister who always gets them in trouble, and what makes it so unbearable besides the ableist rooting, is that it’s just canonically utterly wrong. like go back and watch 13x02 & 03. go back and watch 14x06 when they convince Dean to go on a case behind Sam’s back. or look at any time they’re defiant to Cas (and for the love of god do not look at it as “lol sassy baby dean is a bad influence bad dad 😂” or so help me I am throwing multiple rocks at you). like you can say he’s a bitch. you can say he’s a cunt even. it won’t kill you.

in fact, I implore you to, because it is a step away from infantilizing his every action as silly baby behavior and ergo a step in the right direction. look at the entire apocalypse world arc where he decides he has to personally kill Michael when the plan was only ever to escape through the rift. remember the scene where they’re crying in the woods and it got ran with as hashtag poor baby boy whump and nobody noticed that he’d literally almost strangled someone because of their impulsive temper?? or when they made the decision to brutally torture a man by snapping and twisting his skeleton and burning him so intensely his shirt fabric blackened?? and somehow that gets turned into shit like “daddy hold my sippy cup” because for some fucking reason you guys are so intent on making him out to be a child and infantilizing his canon traits to be more palatable to that idea of him.

TLDR please can we actually recognize how bitchy and violent and rebellious jack is. can you guys realize that his entire behavioral pattern of saying hi and waving hello is him masking and repressing because his emotions literally are nuclear charged and he doesn’t want to be a threat. can we please.

[eddiemunson-reader-shame]

A Freak and a Basket Case: Eddie Munson x Hispanic!Fem!Reader

Chapter 3: No One Like You

I’m back bitches. This chapter was a bastard to get out. I’ve been fucking around writing for every other scenario except the one where you two actually fucking get together. Fucking shit.

I hope you all enjoy my autistic rambling about Dune as well.

[Masterlist] - Chapter One - Chapter Two - Chapter Three (You are Here) - [Latest]

****

“You ever read Clan of the Cave Bear?” You asked.

It was such a non sequitur. You heard an obnoxious snort from next to you threaten to turn into laughter.

“No, what… what the hell is that?” Eddie was red faced. Giggling.

“Prehistoric science fiction, bro” you said. “Caveman shit.”

“Cavemen?!”

Eddie guffawed. Covering his face with his hands as his giggles threatened again.

“It’s not funny!” You whined, unable to control your laughter.

“I’m so… ha! I… I’m sorry…” Eddie insisted, taking a deep breath and exhaling through pursed lips. “I’m sorry. But you said… you said it’s about cavemen?”

“Yeah like, a girl from the Cro-Magnon people gets adopted by a group of Neanderthals and she becomes this hunter who’s all bad, right? Then she gets kicked out of her cave and the second book opens up with her in this valley where she tames a horse and a lion cub. Real girl power shit. But it’s crap.”

“Why crap?”

“Because the girl turns into this air headed romance novel heroine when she meets her perfect jock caveman boyfriend.” You said. “And the book got all torcido in the second novel. You wanna know what her boyfriend Jondalar’s biggest flaw is?”

Eddie raised an eyebrow, clearly entertained by your critique of the story.

"Lay it on me. What's the great character flaw of Jondalar, Mr. Perfect Caveman Boyfriend?"

“He’s sad because no girl on earth can handle his huge fucking wiener.”

Eddie screamed. Honest to god screamed. Screamed like a banshee and then dissolved into the worst fit of laughter you’d ever seen, laughing so hard you could have sworn you saw him trying to clench his butt cheeks so he wouldn’t laugh so hard he’d accidentally fart. He took a deep breath, trying to compose himself, but the idea of a sad dimwitted caveman crying over his trouser snake was too much.

"I swea… I…” he paused, wheezing before he finally inhaled and managed to speak, “God dammit. How the hell did that even make it into a real book?!"

“Evidently Jean M. Auel had a lot of money and a lot of free time to be traveling to sites where they dug up remains.”

You sat up straight on the leather seats of Eddie’s Gaucho, hands seeking out the tactile wonderland of the spots on the leather seats where the top grain had begun to disintegrate.

“Like… imagine though?” you said, voice lowering to a conspiratory whisper as if Jean M. Auel herself was lurking outside the windows listening in, “You spend all kinds of money to actually learn how to make stone tools, build a lean to, and then you go and fuck it all up writing about sad peepee man over here.”

Eddie laughed even harder, his shoulders shaking and his face now burning red as a tomato.

"Peepee man, oh my God... You're killing me here! And… Ha ha, yeah… all that free time and money to learn about the Stone Age, just to turn it into a cringe-fest with Jondalar and his... oh shit!"

There was a frantic scrambling to prevent disaster after Eddie’s muddy Reeboks knocked over a full ashtray, sending a few roaches flying with the blunt in a sea of ashes onto the already filthy floor of the Gaucho. He looked at you, looked at the mess, then began howling again with laughter. You burst into laughter too, a delayed reaction. The distinctly pungent, acrid odor of the aftermath had already gone stale in the enclosed space, and it made you cough a little when you inhaled.

When you both finally looked up at one another after a moment of calm, you noticed Eddie was staring directly at you, smiling widely.

“Damn… you're a bundle of laughs when you're stoned, aren't you? I’ve never met a dork like you who was so captivated by prehistoric wiener.”

“Stop it…” you threatened, shoulders shaking with barely contained laughter, “Don’t make me laugh… I… I’m gonna pee…!”

He was about five seconds away from laughter himself. Biting his lower lip to stop the sound.

“Oh? You want me to stop? Because believe it or not, I’ve got a whole arsenal of stupid jokes I can whip out to see how bad you really need to pee…”

A loud yelp erupted from his throat, followed by laughter when you began swatting him with your Carhartt jacket. The fabric made a snapping sound as it connected with his skin, and the both of you looked like jocks having a towel fight in a locker room when he began hitting you with his denim vest.

Before the van, before the two of you shared the reefer, Eddie had still been holding you by the waist back at school, the two of you hellbent on basking in the presence of one another. Then the bell rang to dismiss the first period, and you had honest to god pouted.

“Don’t make that face.” Eddie had grinned. “Who says we’re going to second period?”

“Huh?!”

“You really think I’m going to let you go to class? Away from me? Nah, we’ve got better things to do. You’re sticking with me today, princess.”

His voice dropped down into a conspirator’s whisper, hot breath ghosting along your ear as he spoke again.

“Unless…” he teased, “You wanna… you know, be a good girl and to second period…?”

“Hell no.”

“Didn’t think so.” He grinned. “After all, we only just started getting properly acquainted. What say you to us having a little alone time in my rather… unorthodox school hang out spots?”

He gave a light squeeze. A promise of an exciting adventure.

You scowled.

“… Bro I don’t even wanna be here at school.” You murmured. “I hate it here.”

His expression had softened. Maybe it was the hint of vulnerability in your voice, or the fact that you looked wilted and drained, either way he nodded eagerly. Desperately trying to please you from the looks of things.

“Yeah, okay… no, no I feel you. This dump was never designed for us. Let’s face it, we’re too badass to be here.”

For a moment you looked around. Confused as to who Eddie was talking to. Who the hell around here was cool besides him? Certainly not you.

“New game plan: let’s ditch class and go on an adventure. Just you and me.” He said.

“Okay but like… What’s there to do here?”

“Hawkins is our oyster. There’s a lot we could do. We could go cruising to the park, the lake, maybe find an old abandoned scary house and get chased by ghosts accompanied by a psychedelic synth number. The sky’s the limit. Anywhere’s more exciting than this hell hole.”

“… there’s a lake?”

You knew lakes. Liked them even. Abiquiu was a particular favorite. With the outcropping of mountains in caramel and umber surrounding the blue water…

“Yeah. Lover’s Lake. It’s quiet there on a school day. Especially now in the morning. Perfect for an adventure. You in?” Eddie asked.

“I wanna go!”

You sound like a damn kid. So eager. It’s just… no one’s ever invited you anywhere before like this. Plenty of your classmates back home ditched. One girl in your math class took off during a pizza party for the simple fact that she didn’t bring anything, and she’d just walked out of the room like nothing while you sat there at your desk gaping after her.

“Atta girl! We’d better be sneaky about it though. I don’t feel like catching hell from dirty old Higgs for commandeering you for a joyride.” He didn’t wait for you to put out your hand. He took yours in his, tugging at you to follow.

You laced your fingers with his, holding onto his arm as the both of you weaved through throngs of students, looking back every now and again to see if anyone noticed you were fleeing Hawkins High. For the most part students and faculty alike avoided Eddie like the plague if they saw him coming, and a stage five clinger like you wasn’t even a blip on their radar. Once you were both outside, the humid summer air punched you both in the face. By the time Eddie led you over to his van, parked all the way in the far corner of the lot, you were sweating and dying to get in it. The van itself was a bit beat up, but it ran, and that's all that mattered in the moment really.

"Here's our chariot. Hop on in, we're gonna have the best field trip of your life." Eddie said, attempting to move to pull the door open for you.

You did not hesitate for a single minute. Immediately once you approached his vehicle you tried the door handle. Just gave it a yank without even making sure the door was unlocked (it was) and hopped into the passenger’s side. He didn’t hesitate either, he just laughed loudly at you, making the engine sputter to life and peeling out of the lot the second he found the opportunity.

"Most girls I know would never just hop into a stranger's van like that. You're either fearless, oblivious, or just crazy," he laughed, rolling down the driver’s side window. “Did McGruff teach you nothing?”

“At this point I wouldn’t even care if you were Baron Harkonnen himself.” You said, buckling in. “I’d still go with you.”

"Well, princess, I promise you I'm nothing as sinister as Baron Harkonnen. Just a humble D&D dork with a bit of a wild side. Although, I do sometimes dabble in the melange trade." He winked at you as he turned the van out onto the road.

“Hold the phone… you… you actually know who the Baron is??” You must have looked incredulous.

No one had ever been familiar with your references to Dune, and here was Eddie just casually dropping lines about the Siridar-Baron and spice melange…

"Of course. Who doesn't know who Baron Vladimir Harkonnen is?" he replied casually, one hand steady on the steering wheel while the other fumbled for a cigarette in the pocket of his denim battle vest.

He must have done it a thousand times, you’d thought. Watching wide eyed as he lit his cigarette with one hand using a dented Zippo lighter.

"Dune's pretty much one of the major foundations for every science fiction world out there. It’s got everything. Space, politics, giant sandworms... What's not to love about it?"

“Yeah but…” You protested, unsure how to voice what you were thinking.

"But what? You seem surprised I know of Dune's existence," he said.

“I kind of am.” Alex admitted. “I never met no one who could keep up with my weirding ways…”

You had been buried deep in the desert sands of Arrakis ever since second grade, when your father had been tasked with reading you a bedtime story. That time you were so sick with pneumonia, the doctor told your parents that you had to miss more than seven days of school. You were inconsolable. You loved your second grade teacher Mrs. Viola so much, and you wanted to play with your best friend Jessica. Instead your parents kept you home and force fed you this disgusting bubblegum pink antibiotic that made you gag. Dad was home from a job luckily, it would be another month before he started hauling again. So instead of dealing with just your mom and brother, Dad was home and he’d decided to read to you from one of his old paperbacks he’d picked up at Waldenbooks while hauling in Dallas a few years prior.

The way Dad described the setting was magical. You loved the gentle intonations of his voice as he spoke aloud the dialogue of the Kwisatz Haderac: Paul Usul Muad’Dib Atreides, and the fearless women of the Bene Gesserit space witches had captivated you body and soul. Arrakis was your second home. Your escape from the world that did not understand you. You longed to learn to ride through burning sand dunes atop Shai-Hulud, to hold the Gom Jabbar with Alia Atreides as she killed the evil Baron Harkonnen, to drink the water of life with Lady Jessica and become the next Reverend Mother, the harbinger of an abomination. You even wanted to join Stilgar and Chani, feeling like a Fremen child yourself as you had been born and raised in the desert just as they were…

Four novels and eleven years later, on all levels except physical, you were still very much buried under the spice tinged sands of Dune, a blue tint evident in your eyes…

"I've read the first book and seen the David Lynch movie, I went with one of my friends." He smiled, glancing over at you briefly before returning to the road, taking a long pull on his cigarette before exhaling. “You’re not the only person in Hawkins who's been tainted by the Weirding Way. So I’ll be privy to any little Bene Gesserit mind tricks you try on me, princess.”

"You know, you're really different from anyone I've ever met before. I mean that in a good way."

It took you a second to remember that you were in Hawkins, Indiana, not on a desert planet or even a desert state. Instead you were laying back on a leather bench seat in the back of a green 1979 GMC Gaucho, smoking pot with a guy that looked exactly like Jason Newsted.

“I’m different?”

You seemed a little shocked at this. Almost offended. What? Was it not normal to get philosophical about prehistoric caveman fiction?

“That’s… that’s kinda cliche, don’t you think…?” You mumbled.

Eddie shrugged, his smirk turning into a lighthearted grin.

"Maybe it is cliche, but I meant it. You're not afraid to speak your mind, princess, even if it's about some fictional dude's wiener."

You couldn’t help the giggle that came out, covering your face.

“… I guess so…” You admitted bashfully. “I guess I just didn’t realize how many girls don’t talk about book characters like it’s some hot school gossip. I… I don’t really talk to a lot of girls, or really guys either… I… I don’t really have friends.”

"Hey… hey, princess."

His warm hand brushed against your bare shoulder, raising the goose flesh against your skin.

"You shouldn't say that. I'm sure there's plenty people who want to be your friend. You just... you need to find your people.”

“I guess but… I don’t know… I don’t… I don’t think there’s really anyone on earth, let alone here in Hawkins, who wants to be my friend.” You said this as if you couldn’t even imagine Eddie, for all his laughter at your antics and his cuddly nature, even wanted to be your friend.

The idea was laughable. There was no way he liked you like that. Maybe you were a fun time? Something silly to do on a Monday morning instead of school.

Eddie paused for a moment, his gaze unwavering.

"I'd be your friend." He said after a moment.

You tensed up. Gulping. Not wanting to look him in the eyes.

“Really?” You whispered.

"Yeah. You're smart, you're funny, and you've got a love for fantasy. Those are all… that’s badass, dude."

“Are you serious to me right now?”

Your voice was so small, so helpless. As if you couldn’t believe it.

Eddie's grip on your shoulder tightened gently. Red rimmed, watery brown eyes boring holes into yours.

"Yeah, really. I'm serious. I'd be honored to have a friend like you."

He gave you a soft, genuine smile with his laugh lines cutting deep, dimples creating divots in his cheeks. Even his eyes were smiling, crinkling at the corners.

You breathed a sigh of relief.

“Well that’s real cool because I really like you and-…” You immediately slapped your hand over your mouth, a squeak erupting from the throat when you realized you had just admitted the quiet part out loud.

Eddie's smirk faded into a look of surprise as he heard the words come vomiting out of your mouth.

"Princess..."

He said your name softly, his eyes searching your face and taking in the flushed expression.

"You... you really like me?"

You didn’t look at him, just kept your mouth covered as you looked down shamefully. Slowly, you nodded your head yes.

“You know, princess… I like you too.”

“You do…?”

“Yeah, I do. I like you a lot.”

“… even if I’m the weird kid you just met…?”

“Especially because you’re the weird kid I just met.” He scooted closer to you, cocking his head to the side and getting in your space.

"You think you’re the only one in this van that does weird out there shit? We’re both weird. We’re both freaks. I don't care if you are a weird girl that talks about sand worms and prehistoric cock. I like it. I like you."

He cupped your face as he said this. Your hands hesitantly reached up, palms over his as you stroked his fingers. Every little sensation from the callouses to the jewelry he wore begged to be touched, your fingers ran along the grooves and ridges of his many rings, finding comfort in the shapes and the feel of the metal.

“… really warm…”

Eddie's breath hitched as he felt your hands on his, the sensation of fingers tracing the edges of his rings sending a pleasant shiver down his spine. He let out a low, soft laugh at your comment.

"Warm, huh? My rings?"

“Yeah…” you nodded. “People… people say that rings are cold but… yours… the metal is warm…”

You looked up at Eddie, and noticed something magical with his eyes: when the morning sun hit them just right, his iris glowed a warm amber, like cognac. And you could see all the beautiful little lines on his face, the eye bags, the early signs of crows feet in the corners of his eyes when he smiled.

You couldn’t help yourself. Your eyes darted down to his rosy lips, chapped and a little dry, but plump. Kissable lips.

Did he taste like cigarettes? Weed? Maybe minty, like toothpaste?

Slowly, your hands left Eddie’s and cupped his cheeks, and you found herself pressing your lips against his. Eager to find out. At first he stiffened, totally caught off guard by your movements. It took a second or two, but at last he began to reciprocate, immediately wrapping his arms around you and pressing you further into his chest.

This didn’t feel real. You couldn’t believe you were doing this… A moment ago you two were having the time of your lives. Nearly pissing yourselves with laughter, enjoying the bantering back and forth and being real friends.

His lips were chapped. Bitten in what might have been a bout of nervous habit, but… oh so warm…

His fingers tangled in your hair, a wet lathing at your bottom lip as his tongue gently stroked across your lower lip. Eddie was pulling desperately at you too, as if trying to get you to hop onto his lap, and you eagerly scrambled onto him. You frowned when you realized he was licking at your bottom lip sloppily, rapidly, as if he was an eager Saint Bernard looking for peanut butter.

“What are you doing…?” you asked.

Eddie blinked, pulled out of his momentary stupor by your question. He quickly tried to explain himself, a hint of guilt in his voice.

"Fuck... I didn't mean to! I just... I thought... I got caught up in the moment! Oh shit… Princess, I'm sorry-..."

“No like… what are you doing with your tongue?” You asked, genuinely confused.

"It's... I’m kissing you? Y’know, like, Frenching? You stick your tongue out and... and kind of…”

What the fuck was he talking about?

It took you a hot minute. A really hot minute to figure it out, and just before Eddie made like he was going to push you off him, you stopped him.

“Like wait no, hold on… is that… is that what they’re doing on tv…?” You asked softly.

Eddie nodded awkwardly. Unsure of what to say.

"Yeah... yeah, it is. When you kiss and... then you kinda slip the tongue. It's called... making out…"

“I mean I know what making out is but like… I didn’t know that’s what was happening… inside.” You said, feeling a little stupid as you too turned red.

"Are you telling me you've never kissed someone with tongue before?"

“… I’ve never kissed anyone in my life… let alone done that tongue thing.”

“Jesus H. Christ, you’re a fucking virgin!” Eddie laughed loudly and obnoxiously, as though reveling in the revelation of your awkward secret.

Now it was your turn to huff indignantly, only staying because Eddie had put his arms around you and held you in place.

“I’m sorr… sorry!” He wheezed. “I’m sorry! No… no that’s not funny.”

“Pinche mamon!” You hissed.

He shook his head, wiping a tear from his eye as he smiled at you gently. His hands began rubbing at your bare shoulders, enjoying the sight of you in your sleeveless linen summer dress.

"Would you like to try it again...?” He asked softly, “The tongue thing?"

You curled your soft legs around his thin waist, your Chuck Taylors pressing into the armrest of the leather bench seats of the van. His body responded automatically, intimates standing to attention in a single fluid contraction of throbbing hot flesh through denim… when you felt him get hard, how could you stay mad at him?

“Yeah… teach me, how do you do the tongue thing…?” you asked.

He gently pressed his forehead to yours, faces mere inches apart.

"Well, princess, it's pretty simple."

He paused for a moment, leaning in slightly closer to your face as he spoke in a soft, low voice.

"Gimme the Gene Simmons, like this..."

He slowly stuck his tongue out, the tip brushing against your lips. You giggled, mimicking him and laughing when his long tongue flicked against yours.

"That's right, princess. Just like that..."

“Then what?” You asked. Words were a bit garbled because your tongue was still lolled out.

"Well, princess, once our tongues are out, we... we kind of…”

He paused, his eyes locked on your lips before leaning in a little closer.

"Let them... explore each other..."

“O-oh…”

Eddie smiled at your quiet, accepting response.

"Don't worry, we'll go slow. We don’t have anywhere to be." He said, eyes never quite leaving your lips.

"I'm gonna kiss you now, okay?"

“Okay…”

"Close your eyes, princess."

You obediently closed them, lips parted slightly as you felt Eddie’s warm breath caress your face. He evidently decided he would skip the gentle pecks and go for the tongue thing, so you kept your mouth a little open this time.

"Good girl.” He whispered, leaning in towards you, “You keep your mouth just like that…”

It was then you realized that not only did he taste like the Camels he smoked, but like cheap beer, chocolate, and some kind of cereal you couldn’t quite place. All a myriad and fucked up mishmash of different flavors.

And you loved every minute of it.