#theyre so father and son to me

[booburt]

law and roule father and son eahaha im replaying laws story on world seeker

[waitineedaname]

I think the Bradleys are unintentionally the funniest part of fmab. Wrath is the leader of a country but King is his first name, not his title. His adopted ten year old son is actually at least 350 years old and his oldest brother. Mrs. Bradley somehow seems unaware that her son does not age or get injured. Pride is so scary and fucked up that even other homunculi don't like him, but he apparently goes to school like a normal little boy and writes essays on how cool and awesome his dad is. Wrath and Pride both hate humans but they both agree that Mrs. Bradley is pretty great. When they die, Wrath ages several decades in like seconds, and Pride gets turned into a fetus. What the fuck is up with them

[scatterbrainedbot]

Hello :D

You're so cool

Anyway have you thought that in your rat sons au Splinter might outlive the boys?

You're very cool :D love your stuff dude

(tw for some blood, light gore, implied overdose (kinda??))

hi copper!!! this is a fantastic question!

so obviously typical irl rats have far shorter lifespans than the average irl tortoise. according to google (yes, be awed by my spectacularly in-depth wealth of research) the average pet rat lives between 2-4 years ish, and the oldest on record lived to be about 7. meanwhile, an African spurred tortoise (Splinter's species) averages more around a 50ish year lifespan in captivity, tho is suspected to possibly exceed 75 or more in the wild.

Now, the mutation does give us a lot of wiggle room for playing with these numbers. For the rat sons boys, id say their natural lifespan probably clocks in at about 45-55 years old? definitely not old by human standards, but not young young either. (though, its also important to note that the boys were exposed to the mutagen just days after being born.)

For Splinter, meanwhile, aging is slightly more complicated. He lived the vast majority of his life as a regular normal African spurred tortoise (well, non-mutated at least. there were perhaps some shenanigans of a more mystical variety going on before he was mutated, but thats a separate matter) He was about 70ish i think? when the boys were born and they were all exposed to the mutagen. so he is already distinctly an old man turtle papa. id guess he'd probably still have another eh lets say 25-30 years after his mutation. he could probably push it a little farther even with some mystic nonsense, but when push comes to shove id say his 'natural' post-mutation lifespan would put his death like a solid decade or two before his sons.

of course, the tricky part of the matter is that theres no way for Splinter to know any of this. theres no way for him to know how the mutation affected them all, or if it even affected them all in the same way. especially since the boys dont show many physical signs of mutation for the first few years, and just kinda look like normal rats, (albeit with a more human sort of intelligence) — what sort of health standard do you hold them to? what if they simply dont show external signs of sickness or old age anymore? how do you actually know if something is wrong?

for a while there Splinter is very worried that one of his babies will just essentially reach the end of their normal rat lifespan, fall and not get up again.

so mostly, he just tries to live in the moment, enjoying whatever time he does have with his little ones, taking each day as a gift <3

still,

that fear

never

really

goes

away.....

[bugspray333]

i have this weird ass headcanon that clown adopted zam and i dont feel like explaining everything right now but when zam was in eclipse fed he tried to ask clown for dating advice without telling him who its about (clown guessed it was subz and vitalasy immediately) so i have this

[dumbazzsz]

I've seen no one talk about this and I just need to

God, the favouritism. No hesitation, Warren is definately the strongest and definately gonna beat Gun and I'm definately not saying this because I trained him and he's like a son to me no definatley not. He definately has a better chance than Johan and everyone else, yes sir.

[vigilskeep]

I know you went into this briefly before. But truly. HOW INSANE adding a child into the Isabelamance arranged marriage Hawke.

Is the child expected to inherit? Does it remove potential matches Hawke could have had, potentially making the fiance lower on the social ladder than Hawke?? The implications?? Does Isabela even LIKE the kid??? What if the kid gets seasick. What then. How does no attachments no complications Isabela allow herself to fall in love with THE most attached man in Thedas.

AND THE KID WOULD BE OLD ENOUGH TO HAVE AGENCY AND OPINIONS AND AND SHIT IN ACT 3 AAAAAAAAAAAAAAJHHH

making this woman the not-stepmother to a kid growing up in a hightown estate just to feel something

[rosalinesurvived]

HOTD 1x07 was where I knew I would be Team Hightower forever. Team Green. I wanted to get my opinions out about That Scene.

Lest we forget, Aegon and Helaena were in the room there. Aemond's eye had been ripped out and nobody gave a fuck. Those children watched their mother, the Queen of Westeros be forced to cry and beg their father for some sort of justice, beg for their Father to give a shit once in their lives. Those three were confronted with the fact that their father not only let the one who ripped out Aemond's eye go free but defend their older sister's mistakes. They had to listen as he threatened to rip out the tongue of people who spoke the truth. The king of Westeros would mute people, his own family who spoke the truth. Imagine what his children would've thought of that? What would Aemond think, who refused to rat on his mother? What would Aegon, with alcoholism already, who had just been blamed by Aemond, screamed at by Viseys and slapped by Alicent think, after he too showed a brother's solidarity for the first time and also refused to tell on her?

For the first time we see a correlation between the Green brothers for their traumatised, gaslit mother against the king in the face of this Injustice. They alongside Helaena realised that in this world they could only trust themselves, as they watched the proof of their mother willingly drawing blood from the Princess for her children. Aemond's step into power here and his calmness sets the way for his role as the family's protector in the future, comforting his mother after she fought for him. You could feel that this was the moment the Green Siblings stepped away from their childhoods, however unwillingly.

[adamsworld96]

another strahm and adam comic

[everythingisawayoflife]

the writer in me…she’s cooking…i think this is the longest thing ive written yet. i shall leave a sample below so i’m satisfied with sharing at least a little bit before i post the full thing (this to me takes place in the new batman adventures universe but feel free to imagine otherwise):

Dick is worried. Tim isn’t the chattiest kid but he can certainly hold a conversation. Dick’s tried everything: school, movies, TV, even casework. All he’s gotten are some unenthused grunts and hums. Tim may not biologically be Bruce’s kid but he sure does take after the guy. He cleaned up a bit before leaving and there’s a little bit of color back in his face but he still looks tired. Devastatingly so. Dick keeps stealing glances at his little brother in the passenger seat of the car. His arms are folded tightly against his abdomen, as if he’s protecting his stomach from something and a slight shiver courses through his body despite Tim bundling up with at least three layers, a scarf, a hat, and very thick gloves. The kid’s got to be cooking in his makeshift snowsuit, but then again…

They’re stopped at a red light. Five minutes out from the mall, three minutes out from the nearest urgent care.

Dick steals another glance towards Tim and decides to reroute to the clinic, get him checked out. Dick tuts quietly, it’s a shame he’s starting to come down with something right before Christmas, right before his first Christmas with them. Dick’s been in his shoes before; falling in a pond ice skating with Barbara. She managed to be just fine whereas he spent Christmas on Bruce’s couch laid up with pneumonia. He hardly remembers that Christmas from being so damn delirious but he remembers the warmth that wasn’t from fever. It was familial. The whole time he remembers being with someone. It was hard to deduce who was with him when but he was never alone. And if Tim was about to go through what he had been through, or something similar, he’d need them. But first, Dick just wanted to check for a fever in the first place. All signs pointed to one but Dick wasn’t sure yet. Careful not to wake the sleeping boy, Dick reaches out for Tim’s forehead.

HONK!

Dick quickly retracts his hand and places it back on the wheel, pressing the gas. To the mall. Tim doesn’t jolt awake but the car horn is clearly loud enough to stir him. He blinks slowly with a grimace, like he’s in pain.

“Are we there yet?” Tim asks, pitifully quiet. Like talking louder than a whisper would kill him.

“Almost, Tim, you can go back to sleep for a bit,” Dick says, taking a left towards the mall.

Tim makes a disapproving noise. “I wasn’t sleeping.”

Hm. Denial is the path he’s choosing here.

“Are you sure? Your eyes were closed and you weren’t talking. Telltale signs of sleeping to me,” Dick says lightly, trying not to come off like he’s interrogating Tim.

Tim laughs a little. “Nope, just resting my eyes.”

“Okay, old man. You’re too young to rest your eyes. Resting your eyes is for old people. Just look at Bruce.”

“Hn.”

“Oh my gosh, B, is that you?” This gets a more hearty laugh from Tim. It’s the most awake he’s looked since this morning.

alrighty thats all im posting, im gonna show the utmost restraint until i actually finish this thing.

[leoleolovesdc]

Bruce acts like he's Stephanie's father but never treats her like a daughter

Stephanie never acts like she's Bruce's daughter but she treats him like a father

[icyfox17]

NEW BLORBO ALERT

Your honour I've seen two (2) episodes and im in love with him

[roe-and-memory]

headcanons

hi tumblr ihave like three headcanons to share currently (there will be more soon i just need to see how well theyre taken, do we like headcanons on here??)

(based off of him not having headlights but how i perceive it humanized even though racecars cant have headlights in Real Life) lightning has light sensitivity issues with his vision . he cannot see. the sun is too bright sometimes and if its dark he will trip over one of the floorboards in docs house, no matter how many times hes walked this floor. (hes very prone to tripping Always but it just gets worse when its dark) (he has rips in the knees of every single pair of jeans he owns)

docs old sunglasses have his name lasered into the arm, lightning found them basically untouched in a box in docs garage. he pulls them out and starts using them when its too bright outside and doc has learned to just hand them over whenever lightning shows up like

2. lightning just. doesnt sleep ?? he is 100% an insomniac and his nightmares are to blame. he would rather work himself to exhaustion than willingly sleep at a normal time. cue him spending most nights out in the fields or at the junkyard with mater building things or whatever until mater is the one to be like ok im tired im going to bed and lightning is forced to go back home, climb back through his bedroom window, and stare at the ceiling until he passes out. he hates sleeping because every night, without fail, he has nightmares. vivid nightmares about whatever his brain can think of, and when he does sleep hes basically fighting his sheets for five hours because of these nightmares, and then he wakes up early and goes about his day as if he wasn't at war with literal demons 20 minutes ago.

doc knows about these nightmares, of course he does, he's a light sleeper and lightnings room is just across the hall, he's also completely aware that the kid sneaks out the window every night because, although lightning is quiet around the house, he is not too graceful when hes attempting to climb out the window -- he's fallen into the bush beneath it countless times.

because of this, doc has tried everything to help him with the nightmare issue, from melatonin to getting him to just write down whatever he was dreaming about to show himself it wasnt real, and absolutely none of it worked. in fact, melatonin seemed to make it worse, and doc gave up there.

3. doc wears a silver "wedding" band. he's not married, in fact he's never been interested in having a partner or getting married at all (i dub thee aroace) but when he was younger he was certainly eye candy for girls at the racetrack and they fawned over him like nobodies business. he comes up with the great idea to get a silver ring and lie, he makes up some tragic backstory to tell whenever a woman asks him why he has a ring or who the lucky person is, and it makes them back of pretty quickly. in reality, the ring is made from a small wheel bearing, and smokey made it for him when he asked because he thought it was funny as hell and was like yes sure but pls make it sound ridiculous . and dont ever tell the same story twice. confuse them.

word gets around and he's told multiple different stories so everyone is confused, but if someone questions him he just gives them a Look and they shut up about it.

even after his crash and his inevitable leave from the piston cup and thomasville, along with his change of address, he continued to wear the ring just in case he got recognized or something.. (it was for aesthetic reasons, he loves that ring its just his signature thing now)

ok... thats it for now, is this how things get formatted here??? do we Like this???

[blusandbirds]

jason and bruce (went looking for a creation myth, ended up with a pair of cracked lips)

fight club (chuck palahniuk) // batman (#650) // batman: under the red hood (2010) // at the dinner table with god and my father (b: william bearhart) // corpus christi (terrence mcnally) // the sun is also a star (nicola yoon) // sun bleached flies (ethel cain) // i know the end (phoebe bridgers)

[plutoslvr]

if I think about this too long I spontaneously combust

[bugspray333]

[tandytoaster]

The lil 14 year old trans boy at my work said I was his favourite