#they're just snails man
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D-Do you think the snails were a metaphor for Grian's love for his friends, unbreakable and always chasing them, but whenever someone gets too close, he ends up killing them?
#wild life smp#Grian#I think my angst brain has gone too far#they're just snails man#BUT WHAT IF THEY WERENT#widows curse#wild life#life series#trafficblr#traffic series#the life series#wlsmp#wild life snails#Grian mc#traffic life#Winnie talks
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LET THEM BE CORAL
Also in what fucking universe are corals almost protists

who let biologists play dnd
#Snail rebubbles#D&D#marine biology#corals are cnidarians#Like very specifically if you're allowed to be a man o war you should be allowed to be a coral#they're both a bunch of cnidarians stuck together#You can't just go calling every multicellular animal you don't like a protist words mean things#...were they thinking of sponges???#I can *sort of* see the argument for sponges#with the minimal tissue differentiation and the amebocyte trick
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Trans Tim off handedly mentioning random things that just confuse people more and more because he never told them he was trans (only Bruce and Alfred know)
Tim: "For the mission I'm thinking I'll go undercover, but it'll take some work to hide the bruises I got earlier. They're everywhere"
Dick: "Oh I think Steph is free right now!"
Tim: "...Ok?"
Dick: "Don't worry I'm sure she'll help you out with this! "
Tim: "That's awesome but I don't think I'll need help. I know how to use makeup."
Dick: "Really-? Ohhh, yeah your public image is like, way more public than ours. That must be tiring, having to hide the bruises all the time."
Tim: "Well yeah but I knew how to use makeup before that. For like, galas as a kid and stuff"
Dick: "...yeah..."
-----
Steph: -Complaining about a man- "And then he said "Oh you should smile more" like "you look like you don't want to be here" like what- what the fuck-??? Maybe I fucking don't dude."
Tim: "Oh yeah I hate when they do that. Like you've spent the entire time bitching about the consistency of snails, I can close my mouth for a few seconds."
Steph: "..."
Tim: "...What-?"
Steph: "Well- I mean yeah but- you know I have to deal with it like...way more, and it's just a bit weird that like, you as a guy are, I dunno, trying to relate? I mean you don't have to deal with it litreally everyday"
Tim: "Well yeah not anymore, but, you know...I still did."
Steph: :...What-"
-----
Tim: -Resting against one of the rooftop ledges-
Jason: "Woah, I can't believe it, Red Robin, slacking. What would Bruce do if he saw this!"
Tim: "Fuck off, it's just period cramps." -Jumps off the edge of the building-
Jason: "Yeah whatever Timblina...
Your fucking what-"
-----
Bruce: "And for this mission, we'll be needing someone for the Caroline disguise, but we already know who that is so-"
Dick: "Wait does Steph actually know how to fight in heels-??"
Bruce: "...N-"
Steph: "Yeah Bruce, I mean, you could at least actually ask me before volunteering me to go fight crime in that dress."
Bruce: "You-"
Jason: "I mean no offense, but literally who else would do it? Cass isn't here right now and I don't think any of us are willing to get a boob job for the mission"
Bruce: "No one's getting a boob job-"
Steph: "Yeah! This is bat tech, Bruce probably has ultra realistic titties in everyone's color and size! Jason you wouldn't even need an attachment."
Jason: "I don't think Caroline Hills has fifty gun shot wounds and muscles the size of most those guys heads."
Steph: "Yeah bu-"
Bruce: "None of that will be necessary because none of you" -Pointing at the right side of the table- "Will be going. No one at this table will be needing any prosthetics...Or boob jobs."
Steph: "...Ok but who the fuck is going then-"
Bruce: "Tim."
The entire table: "..."
Steph: "Tim are you really willing to put on boobs for this-"
Dick: "I don't think that's the best idea-"
Jason: "You just said no prosthetics- Oh this'll be fucking rich"
Tim: "...
I...wouldn't need a boob job?? Or prosthetics?"
Jason: "Timbo, that dress is a pretty low cut, and, no offense, your training hasn't given you that many enhancements."
Tim: "...Thank you for the binding compliment?"
Dick: "The what-"
Tim: "Guys I- I already have boobs-"
The Table: "..."
Steph: "WHAT-"
Dick: "You do-?!"
Jason: "Bruce if you made Tim get boobs for some weird mission-"
Tim: "What- No! No one made me get boobs??? Besides, I don't know, biology I guess??? Genetics maybe???"
Dick: "...I'm extremely confused"
Steph: "WHO GAVE YOU BOOBS-???"
Tim: "I'm not really sure seeing as I was born with them"
Dick: "...
OHHHHHH-"
Steph: "What- is this like a birth defect or something???"
Dick: "Tim- Tim I think you're just gonna have to-"
Tim: "I'm trans."
Jason: "...That's-
Yeah
Ok yeah no that- that explains...a lot."
Steph: "..." -Head in hands- "I am such a fucking idiot"
#tim drake#timothy drake#timothy jackson drake#dick grayson#jason todd#stephine brown#bruce wayne#red robin#nightwing#red hood#batgirl#spoiler dc#dc universe#dcu#batman#batfamily#batkids#trans tim drake#batfamily incorrect quotes#batfam#batfam incorrect quotes
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Don't Panic
The lads men finding you asleep with your child in your arm while you were trying to feed them. You're a first time mom you're not going to be perfect. A/N: This is a mommy mc if you're uncomfortable with the idea of mommy mc this is your warning [Requested by: who-mentioned-rhys-larsen]
Summary: You were a first time mom and motherhood was the hardest hood you’ve ever lived in. Even with your husband doing his fatherly duties you were still exhausted. You checked the time on your watch and noticed it was feeding time. You hoisted your baby into your arms and sat down on the bed to breast-feed. You blinked rapidly trying to keep yourself awake “I’ll nap when you’re done eating” You said more so to yourself rather than the baby when suddenly …. you woke up. When did you doze off? The sun was up last time you checked now it's dark out. Where’s the baby? Oh shit where’s the baby!?
Zayne
Zayne came home to find you curled up with your child who was snoring quietly while you held them snuggly in your arms. He picked your babygirl up careful not to wake you and moved her to the adjoining nursery. She squirmed a little at the loss of warmth, but calmed down once Zayne swaddled her.
A few hours later…
MC: ZAYNE!
Zayne: Darling stop yelling before you wake the baby
MC: Where is she?? I fell asleep while feeding her oh fuck im a terrible mom
Zayne grabs you by the shoulders
Zayne: Breathe my love she’s fine I put her in her bed
MC: *teary-eyed* did I hurt her?
You dropped your gaze feeling your heart shatter at the thought of hurting your child
Zayne: You had her held safely in your arms she’s fine go look
You rushed to the nursery to find your babygirl in a peaceful slumber. A wave of relief washed through you causing you to fall to your knees.
MC: I won't let that happen again
Zayne: Go get some sleep my love you’ve earned it I'll take care of the baby
MC: but-
Zayne: You’ll be no good sleep-deprived go rest
Rafayel
MC: WHERE ARE THEY?
You rush out into the living room after tearing your room apart looking for your babies
Rafayel: Quiet down. Why are you yelling?
MC: I CANT FIND THE TWINS
Rafayel: You lost our kids?
MC: I-I accidentally fell asleep and and and when I woke up they were gone I-I-I omg im the worst mom alive
Rafayel: Are these two not ours?
You walk around the couch to find them each fast asleep, one laying in his lap and the other sprawled out next to him on a blanket.
MC: I should punch you in the jaw fuck I think I just had a heart attack thats not funny
Rafayel: I found you asleep in the bedroom with your titty out
MC: Well thats embarrassing
Rafayel: It was a nice surprise … This baby shark was trying to climb on you when I came in
Rafayel said pointing to your baby boy who was drooling all over his lap
Rafayel: and this little sea snail was curled up next to you
Rafayel placed his hand on the tummy of your babygirl
MC: I’m glad they're safe
You sighed, relieved that your babies were fine
Rafayel: You should probably go do that pumping thing you always do …. you’re leaking
MC: Shit!
Rafayel: My little leaky faucet
MC: Please put your top and bottom lip together

Xavier
You sat up quickly almost head butting Xavier who was standing over you
Xavier: Whoa you should change your shirt you have spit up on this one
MC: Where's the baby!?
Xavier: I just put him in his crib
MC: Is he okay? I didn’t roll over on him did I? Was he breathing?
Xavier: Yes. No. and Yes.
Xavier began removing your shirt
MC: Wait wait I need to see our son
Xavier: Okay but lets change your shirt first
MC: No—I need—-Xav move
You end up wrestling Xavier who’s just trying to get you out of your soiled shirt. He manages to slip it off and you dart out of the room with no shirt. You quietly make your way in the nursery and see your baby boy sleeping soundly. Man he looks so much like his dad it’s crazy.
Xavier: Here. *pulls a shirt over your head*
MC: Thanks Xav Im sorry I was just so scared
Xavier: I understand ... now according to Jenna since the baby is down you should get some rest too let’s go
MC: Are you going to nap with me?
Xavier: Jeremiah was in the living room when you ran through to get to our son
MC: Did he see.....?
Xavier: He won't remember even if he did
MC: JEREMIAH IM SORRY
Sylus
MC: WHERE IS SHE??
Kieran: Calm down
Luke: You’ll wa—
MC: DON’T TELL ME TO CALM DOWN
Sylus: She’s right here
You turn to see Sylus holding your baby girl in his arms. She's playfully tugging on his necklace while he continuously moves her little hand away.
MC: Mommy is so sorry baby …. did I hurt her? I didn’t mean to fall asleep
Sylus: You’re going to make yourself sick with all this worrying
MC: I just fell asleep with our child in my arms that seems like grounds to worry Sylus
Sylus: She was fast asleep on your chest and you had your arm wrapped around her
MC: It’s still dangerous
Sylus: and yet she’s fine live and learn sweetie everything will be fine
MC: It’s like my third day out here okay im still learning this mom shit
Sylus: Rule number 1 don’t cuss in front of the baby
MC: Oh shut up
Sylus: Rule number 2 don’t be rude to her dad
MC: Anything else?
Sylus: Rule number 3 dont forget to pump
You look down and realize you have two wet patches on your shirt
MC: Shit!
Sylus: Rule number 1—
MC: Shut it!
#love and deepspace#sylus love and deepspace#sylus#lnds sylus#love and deepspace sylus#lads#lads rafayel#lads xavier#lads zayne#lnds#lnds zayne#lnds xavier#lnds rafayel#lads sylus#zayne love and deepspace#rafayel love and deepspace#xavier love and deepspace#nikaaaaimagine
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Phil: I still stand by, if I get a snail, I'm gonna fail RP and log out.
Sneeg: I don't think they're gonna give you one just like, unsolicited. Especially 'cuz you've threatened to not play? 🙄
Phil: [Cracks up] I've played these games before! I've done it before, man! I genuinely probably need therapy, but I'm just putting it off! [Laughs]
Sneeg: How do you explain to a therapist that you're attached to an Egg from Minecraft though? 🤨
Phil: Ok, so there's this server, right? And it's ran by my friend, and– It's– brings in people from various different cultures and languages, and then– and then he decided: "Oh, you know what would be really cool to keep people playing? And invested? What if we give them a fcking EGG?"
Phil's Chayanne and Lullah emotes were made by @strawbekka.
[ Full Transcript ↓ ]
—
Phil: I still stand by, if I get a snail, I'm gonna fail RP and log out.
Sneeg: I don't think they're gonna give you one–
Phil: Good
Sneeg: –just like, unsolicited. Especially 'cuz you've threatened to not play? 🙄 Um...
Phil: [Cracks up]
Sneeg: I don't think they're... I don't think they're gonna gamble on that.
Phil: I'm not doin' this NPC, like– actor– like, thing on server again! I've played these games before!
Sneeg: [Laughs]
Phil: I've played these g– I've done it before, man! I genuinely probably need therapy, but I'm just putting it off! [Laughs] For- for fckin'–
Sneeg: How do you explain to a therapist that you're attached to an Egg from Minecraft though?
Phil: Ok, so there's this server, right? And it's ran by my friend, and– it's–
Sneeg: [Overlapping with Phil] There's this server– and then there was an Egg, with a glock. [Laughs]
Phil: –Brings in people from various different cultures and languages, and then– and then he decided: "Oh, you know what would be really cool to keep people playing? And invested? What if we give them a fcking EGG?"
Sneeg: Attachment. [Laughs] Attachment to something!
Phil: "What if we give them an Egg that- that has wants and needs? And you need to look after it."
Sneeg: And a personality!
Phil: Yeah, "And a personality, and- [stammers] and quirks and- and–"
Sneeg: [Overlapping with Phil] And its life's in danger, people– things were trying to kill it.
Phil: Yeah. And things keep trying to kill it, and you have to save it, you are its– you are its only s– hope.
Sneeg: If it dies, it's your fault. It's your fault! Your fault. [Laughs]
Phil: [In unison with Sneeg] Your fault! Your entire audience of thousands of people will be PISSED if you don't care! If you don't care, you are a MONSTER!
Sneeg: [Overlapping with Phil] And they're so valid, they're so valid 'cuz it's true.
Phil: [Laugh] Imagine joining my stream, and I'm just like reading a bedtime story to a little Egg.
Sneeg: [Cracks up]
Phil: Like– [Laughs] Like, what a CRAZY way to come back!
Sneeg: "Oh, my favorite vanilla Minecraft streamer Philza Minecraft's on– playing Minecraft today, let's see what he's doing!" [Voice cracks as he tries not to laugh]
Phil: Yeah, "What's- what's Kusump?" [QSMP]
Sneeg: –and you're like: [Leaning into his mic] "Humpty Dumpty." [Laughs]
Phil: "What's Kusump? What's this? Why's he got an Egg, and why is it just holding up a sign that just says 'Food'?"
#Philza#Sneegsnag#QSMP#The Realm SMP#Phil#Sneeg#January 24 2025#Edited#I'll be real I had this ready to post like 6 hours ago#But I just didn't have it in me to write the transcript#I've got like 7 other clips I was going to trim down and post but. I'm just tired#And I probably need to let the folks on Twitter know I'm going to stop posting there pretty soon#I'll share this clip though#Anyways. Hope this gives folks a laugh#I wanted 100% confirmation that strawbekka did those emotes because I wasn't sure so I frickin pulled up the VOD#Stream date: January 15 2024 Timestamp: 5:42:55 Phil talks about commissioning them
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Delilah's language (part three)
Previous | Master Post | Next
Danny stood next to Mr. Bruce, watching as people milled around and chatted. a large group gathered right in front of them.
They had flown to Gotham last night, and Danny had been given a nice room to stay in at some fancy hotel. motel? which one was supposed to be fancy?
eh, either way, Danny settled into the room and promptly went back to sleep. He managed to get a total of twelve(12) hours of sleep before waking up. he spent the time after that just sitting and playing on his phone until his alarm went off.
that was two hours ago, and now here he was, standing in the middle of Gotham City Zoo at 8 in the morning. No one had noticed them yet, which Danny was greatly appreciative of; he had not been ready for this.
Sure, Mr. Bruce had said he invited all the scientists, but this? this was not what he was expecting.
he was expecting maybe one or two scientists to be standing around, watching Dalilah and her family as some rich kid hounded them for answers. they were scientist, surely, they had better things to do than attend some kid's birthday party.
but no.
All of them were here. All. Of. Them.
the whole scientific team was in attendance, and right in the middle of them was the birthday boy. his voice drowned out by the scientists all hungrily trying to force their knowledge into his brain.
oh dear ancients what had Danny agreed to?
suddenly, an older boy (slightly younger than Danny, it seemed) approached the group and turned the birthday boy to look in their direction. Danny's poor overstimulated enhanced hearing instantly zeroed in on what they were saying, a pool of dread settling in his stomach. "look, Damian. Bruce is back with that dude you wanted to meet."
Immediately, the kid's green eyes lit up in excitement as they settled on Danny and the kid's father. The boy promptly shoved past the other scientist and marched over to them, mouth somehow set into a scowl even though Danny could feel the kid's excitement increase tenfold. The older boy easily followed behind in amusement.
before the kid could open his mouth, Danny felt the air shift next to him. It wasn't a ghost, they wouldn't have been so obvious, and his sense hadn't gone off, so human then. (he should have heard them earlier, but with how loud it was? Danny wasn't too worried about how he had missed the person) which means, Danny couldn't react obviously or people would ask questions.
tensing up, to prevent his body from reacting on instinct, he waited for the person to act. Not even a second later, someone threw their arm around Danny's shoulders and pulled him close to their side, their voice bright and cheerful. "Damian! look who Bruce dragged in!"
Danny turned his head to glance at the man, he had black hair and blue eyes. This wasn't a surprise, considering almost all the kids Bruce adopted had the same features, so which one was this? One of the older ones, obviously, hmmm. Slim frame, but still musculer. perfect for swimming or gymnastics. So, that would mean, this was Dick Grayson, the oldest?
"tch," Damian scowled even more, "release him, Grayson." bingo. Danny had been correct then. and that was one heck of a scowl, how did the kid do that? Danny could feel he was happy at the sight of the older boy, but somehow, he looked like he'd rather be eating snails than deal with the man.
maybe he should introduce him to Sam, she'd love to learn how to do that.
"Alright! Alright!," Grayson chuckled, what was Danny supposed to call him? Dick or Grayson? Richard? "I'm just trying to be nice."
he turned to face Danny, releasing him from his grasp, his smile almost blinding, "Hi there! my name is Dick. Yes, that is my name. No, I'm not joking. It's nice to meet you, what's your name?"
Danny blinked, then hesitantly shook the man's hand. he should have stayed home, anything would have been better than this. oh, shit they're all looking at him now. "uh, my name's Danny. Danny Fenton."
"Danny! nice. So, what did you do to be invited?" Dick asked, resting his hands in his pockets and lifting a brow. Mr. Bruce had walked away a while ago, so Danny would have to deal with this himself it seems.
Damian rolled his eyes but looked curious as well.
"uh, Mr. Bruce," This got an immediate reaction from all three of them; their eyes widening in surprise and maybe a hint of glee, "invited me. something about how Damian wanted to learn how to speak with Dalilah."
"Really?" asked the other boy, Tim? "you can actually speak with them?"
"Tch, of course not, Drake. The purple-backed gorillas do not have a spoken language, they use their bodies to communicate. Daniel here is the only person in the world to figure out how to communicate with them."
"Don't call me that," Danny cut in, wincing when they turned to look at him, "my name's Danny, not Daniel."
"isn't Danny a nickname for Daniel?" Damian asked, his brows furrowed. "I do not call people by their nicknames, it creates a false familiar connection."
"Usually," Danny conceded, "but my name isn't Daniel. My parents chose Danny, it's not a nickname. and if you really don't want to call me that, then you can use my last name. It shouldn't be a problem considering I'm the only Fenton here."
"Oh," Damian blinked, then thought about it for a second, "Danny it is then."
The other two shared a glance, clearly surprised for whatever reason. Sighing, Danny waved his hand in agreement. The kid could call him whatever he wanted, just not Daniel. Anything but Daniel. (Ancients forbid if he gets called Dan.)
"Anyway, like you were saying. Delilah speaks with her body movements but there is a vocal part. It's a little like sign language and that one whistle language combined, but instead of just using your hands, facial movements, and whistles to communicate, you have to use your whole body. All at once."
Danny then rubbed his neck, "And I'm sure someone else would be able to speak with her if they just paid attention. It's not that hard."
"Not that hard?" Grayson asked, glancing at the gorillas. "how long did it take you to figure out her language then?"
"Oh," Danny blinked, then shrugged, "like, two hours. Like I said, it's really not that hard, you just have to watch her talk for a while."
"two hours?!" Tim, Danny's pretty sure his name was Tim, gaped, staring at Danny like he was nuts. which, Danny didn't appreciate by the way. "It only took you two hours to figure it out?"
Danny wasn't sure if he should feel offended or amused...
"That's impossible," someone scoffed, dragging all of their attention to an approaching scientist. "It takes upwards of three months to multiple years of hard work to even understand human sign language, let alone animal gestures. You couldn't have learned it in just two hours."
Danny rolled his eyes, he remembered this guy. Dr. Trynul or something or whatever, he absolutely refused to believe Danny the last time they talked. he was a real stick in the mud if Danny ever saw one.
"Danny Fenton is listed as the only person in the world to have the ability to communicate with the gorillas. It even says as much in the scientific papers your group released last month." Damian huffed, narrowing his eyes at the man.
Dr. Trynul rolled his eyes, "I requested they leave that false information out, but Mertil absolutely refused to listen to reason."
"and it's a good thing she didn't," another researcher cut in. Danny remembered her from the first time he had to talk with the scientist involved with Dalilah. Real stern but a nice lady.
"This young man can communicate with them just like he would if he was one of them. I've seen it with my own eyes." she then turned to the group, a small smile growing on her face.
"Danny, it's so good to see you again! Delilah has been just such a sweetheart, and her baby is just the cutest thing in the world. You have to come and see them."
Danny rubbed the back of his neck and smiled back, "Sure, Oh!" He turned back to Damian, "maybe I can introduce you to them if you haven't been already?"
The boy nodded his head, his excitement rolling off of him in yellow swirls. Turning back, Danny nodded his head with a small smile, "Please, lead the way."
Next
#danny has no clue what's going on#danny is a genius#especially with languages#dp x dc#dc x dp#dpxdc#danny phantom#danny fenton#dcxdp#dp x dc crossover#batman#part four coming soon#dead silent#but like they're both ace#because i said so
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The Woman Next Door
Pairing: Lando Norris x Reader
Summary: After winning the Dutch Grand Prix, Lando returns home to Monaco, eager to prove his genuine feelings to his neighbor, especially after their bet.
Word Count: 4181
You're my downfall, you're my muse My worst distraction, my rhythm and blues I can't stop singing It's ringing in my head for you
Lando had been your neighbour for nearly two years, a friendly presence in the building. But with you, his charm seemed to intensify. He flirted casually, his eyes sparkling with a playful passion. "You're my type!" He'd always say. Yet, your heart remained unmoved. The women he brought home were a strong contrast to you: tall figures in designer heels, showing their immense beauty. You, however, were a simple person who preferred simplicity over expensive clothing and felt most comfortable in jeans and sneakers.
Lately, his flirtations had intensified. He always ensured you knew he was single and was waiting for you. His promises of making you happy and treating you right were sweet, but you weren't fooled. Deep down, you couldn't deny a flicker of attraction, but you kept it hidden. Lando was a handsome man, but you'd seen enough to know he was more than just a pretty face.
"How was your family?" Emily asked, turning to you as she drove. She'd picked you up from the airport in Nice.
You smiled. "They're fine! It was great to be back home. I missed them."
"You know who else missed you?" Emily teased, a mischievous glint in her eye.
"Who?" You asked, confused.
"Your hot neighbour! I ran into him yesterday at the supermarket and he asked about you."
Your eyebrows furrowed. "Did he?"
"Yeah! He said, 'How's Y/n? I haven't seen her for a while. The building seems quite boring without her.'"
You crossed your arms. "He didn't say that!"
"I'm serious! I told him you were coming back today, so maybe he'll be waiting by your door, ready to confess his feelings. And then... BANG! Happily ever after."
You couldn't help but wince at Emily's over-the-top dramatic gestures. Despite her tendency to go overboard, you couldn't help but love her for it.
"You've been watching too many films."
"You're going to end up together. Mark my words." She replied and you made a gagging sound that made her laugh.
As she dropped you off at your apartment building, you grabbed your luggage and thanked her with a tight hug. You entered the building and pressed the lift button.
As the liftdoors opened, you stepped inside, dragging your luggage behind you. You were admiring your reflection in the mirror when a hand stopped the doors, causing them to reopen.
You turned to see Lando, dressed in a McLaren white vintage t-shirt and black jeans. His curls were perfectly coiffed, and a smirk played on his lips. Like always.
"Look who's back!" Lando's voice filled the cramped lift. "Good to see you."
"Hi, Lando." You replied.
The two of you lived on the top floor, making the lift feel even smaller and slower. "How were the holidays?"
"Fine! Too short." You admitted, the tension palpable. "What about you?"
Lando studied you from head to toe, his gaze lingering on your face. "They were good. Family, friends, good weather. But I'm glad to be back to work." The lift seemed to be moving at a snail's pace. "And happy to see you again."
"Here we go!"
Lando chuckled. "What?"
"You know what! You know that flirting with me isn't going to work. I'm not interested."
"But I am!" He said. You quickly looked away, praying for the elevator doors to open. "I'm very much interested."
"To how many girls have you said that?" You asked, your voice laced with scepticism.
"None, believe it or not." Lando replied, his tone sincere.
As the lift doors opened, you stepped out and fumbled for your keys. Lando leaned against the wall beside you. "What can I do to convince you to go on a date with me?"
You took a deep breath, finally finding your keys. He was starting to make you nervous. "I don't think your fans would like to see you having dinner with a woman."
"That's not a problem for me." He said confidently. "I'll have dinner with whoever I want." As you unlocked your apartment door, he continued, "But if that's the issue, we can have dinner at my place, eat McDonald's in my car, anything to make you comfortable."
You pushed your luggage inside and faced him. "Lando…" You began, your voice soft but firm. "I'm not looking for a one-night stand. I want a relationship. A public relationship. I want to go out with my partner, have dinner, eat ice cream, have meaningful conversations on the balcony. I want trust, and I don't want to worry about being cheated on. I want kids and I don't want to wait until my thirties. Marriage isn't essential, but I want this person to be my last. If you want me to go on a date with you, prove to me that you're that person." Lando listened intently, his expression serious. "Bye, Lando!"
You started to close the door, but Lando's hand quickly stopped it.
"Uh, when was the last time you saw me bring a woman home?"
You swallowed hard, trying to regain your composure. "What?"
"I haven't brought anyone home since I told you I liked you. Four months ago! I never told you I was looking for a one-night stand. I've always been open about my past relationships and I've never cheated on anyone. I also want to have a family and I'll convince you to change your mind about marriage." You stared at him, speechless. "But if I have to prove myself, I'm up for the challenge!" He said, winking as stepped away. "Bye, Y/n."
You closed and locked your door, your heart pounding in your chest. Your cheeks were flushed. For the first time, he had left you speechless. You'd always dismissed his flirting as a joke, but now you realized that maybe it was more than that.
Later that night, you invited your friends Maria and Lisa over for dinner and a movie night. You didn't want to be alone with Lando next door, and you needed to talk about it.
"He's so into you!" Lisa exclaimed, her eyes sparkling with excitement. "It's the classic boy-next-door story."
You set the popcorn and wine on the coffee table. Maria, already a bit tipsy from dinner, was making the most confident comments you'd ever heard from her.
"Just go on a date with him. He's handsome, rich, and lives next door. What more do you want?"
"I want stability, honesty, and someone who makes me happy and laughs with me." You replied.
"He already does that!" Maria insisted. "He was honest with you, you laugh with him, and I'm sure he'd make you happy, if you know what I mean." She chuckled, and Lisa joined in.
"You're drunk!" You teased.
"I am, but I'm still the wiser one." She retorted. "Why don't you just sleep with him? See how that makes you feel."
Your eyes widened in surprise. "You know I'm not like that. When I'm with someone, it's because I like them."
"But you do like him." Lisa argued.
You rolled your eyes and stood up. "I'm going to the bathroom."
Lando was engrossed in a game with Max when the doorbell rang. He glanced at the clock, surprised by the late hour. He wasn't expecting anyone and it was unusual for someone to just walk into the building and ring his bell.
"Someone's at the door." He told Max, removing his headphones. The doorbell rang again. "Give me a second."
He was taken aback to see your friend, Maria, standing there. Her cheeks flushed and the scent of alcohol was strong.
"Lando, hi!" She slurred.
He furrowed his eyebrows, confused. One of your other friends was watching from your apartment door.
"Hi, Maria! What can I do for you?" Lando asked, his tone polite but curious.
"Quick!" Lisa whispered to Maria.
"Look, I'm going to the point. Y/n wants to go on a date with you, but she's afraid you only want to get in her pants." Maria blurted out.
Lando crossed his arms and leaned against the doorframe. "Is that so? Does she know you're doing this?"
You were nowhere to be seen, and he couldn't believe you'd ask your friends to do something like that.
"Of course not! But we're her friends and we know she really likes you. She doesn't show it, but she does." Maria insisted.
You dried your hands and glanced in the mirror, adjusting your hair before opening the bathroom door.
To your surprise, the girls were gone from the living room, but you heard giggles coming from the door. As you approached, you realized what was happening.
"So, about the date…" You pushed past Lisa, finding Maria deep in conversation with Lando.
You quickly stepped out and grabbed Maria's hand. "What are you doing?" You were panicking.
"I'm helping you!" She whispered, but everyone could still hear her.
"You're not. Come on!" You started walking her back to your apartment, but Lando stopped you by gently grabbing Maria's wrist.
"You can't take her now. She was about to tell me what I need to do to convince you to go on a date with me." He said, smirking. You resisted the urge to slap the smirk off his face.
"She's drunk. She doesn't know what she's talking about." You argued.
"She clearly does." Lando insisted.
Maria nodded in agreement. "Yes, I do. Lando, you just have to win."
You and Lando looked at her, each holding one of her wrists.
"What?" You asked.
"She'll go on a date with you if you win the next race." Maria announced.
Lando smirked and looked at you. You opened your mouth to protest, but he was quicker. "We have a deal!"
"No, we don't!" You said, but no one seemed to be listening.
Maria extended her hand for Lando to shake. "Deal! You better win, because I won't be able to help you again." She winked and went inside your apartment.
You looked at Lando, your arms crossed. "That's not going to happen, you know that right?"
"Why? Are you afraid I'll win?" He challenged.
"No!" You replied.
"So, let's do it. If I win, you go on a date with me--"
"And if you lose, you'll stop asking me to go on a date with me!" You added. Lando stood still, considering. "What? Are you afraid you'll lose?"
After a moment, Lando extended his hand. "Fine!" You grabbed his hand and shook it.
The weekend arrived sooner than you'd expected. Lando had qualified P1, making you question your decision to agree to the bet. You were a Mercedes fan, but deep down, were you rooting for McLaren? It was great to see him win again, but was this really the best time to root for him?
You sat on Emily's sofa between Lisa and her dog, Zeus, watching the race. You wore your Mercedes cap, while Lisa and Maria sported their Ferrari t-shirt. Neither of your friends was a McLaren fan, but today they couldn't stop shouting the name of the British driver.
"Oh my god, he's going to win!" Lisa exclaimed.
"Don't jinx it." Emily replied, slapping her arm.
You slumped on the sofa, unable to say anything. Only when the race ended did you let out a sigh you didn't realize you were holding. He had won the Dutch Grand Prix. He had actually won.
Your friends jumped in the air, celebrating his victory. You ran your hands through your hair.
"Guess who's going on a date with a hot British driver!" Lisa mocked, pulling you up from the sofa.
"You are!" Emily repeated, jumping around you.
An hour later, you were walking home alone. The Monaco weather was pleasant, and the streets were bustling with people.
As you arrived at the building, your phone vibrated in your pocket. You pulled it out to see a message from Lando.
Lando: Hope you're free tomorrow night! I can't wait for our date.
Fuck, you mumbled to yourself.
On Monday, you left the apartment earlier than usual. The night before, Lando had knocked on your door, hoping to talk to you, but you couldn't bring yourself to answer. The next day, you woke up an hour earlier and left for work, hoping to avoid him on your way out. But the universe had other plans.
As you were leaving the building, you bumped into Lando, who had been out for a run.
He chuckled. "Leaving earlier to ignore me?"
You cleared your throat. "No, I just have a big project going on… and have to go earlier."
"Okay." He said, clearly not believing you. "So, I hope you're excited for tonight."
"I don't-- I don't think I have time tonight." You stammered.
"Well, I already reserved our table, and I don't think you'd back out of a bet. So, I'll pick you up at 7 pm. Wear something orange if you have it." He whispered in your ear before walking away.
You'd been thinking about Lando all day, your mind racing with anticipation and nerves.
Upon returning home, you immediately took a long shower and emptied your closet to find the perfect outfit. A nice orange summer dress caught your eye. You couldn't remember the last time you'd worn it, but you recalled how flattering it was with your tan.
When you put it on, it looked even better than you remembered. However, doubts crept into your mind. What if he just wanted to get in your pants? What if this was all a joke to him?
Lando knocked on your door at 7 pm sharp, and a few seconds later, you opened it. Lando struggled to contain his astonishment at your appearance.
You were wearing a cute red dress and heels. Your long hair was wavy and you looked stunning. You always looked amazing, but tonight there was a special glow about you. It was a shame you weren't wearing orange.
"Wow!" He said, taking in your appearance. "You look... beautiful."
You blushed and looked away, trying to hide it. "Thank you." You whispered.
You closed your apartment door, and Lando called for the lift. The ride to the garage was silent, surprising you that Lando hadn't said anything flirty or teased you.
He guided you towards his Lamborghini Urus, and you muttered a silent thank-you that he chose the Urus. Of all his cars, it was the most "normal" on the streets of Monaco.
As you left the garage, you broke the silence. "Where are we going?" You asked over the soft music of the radio.
Lando glanced at you. He looked good in his black pants and white shirt. You loved a man in a white shirt.
"It's a surprise."
"I hate surprises!" You said.
Lando laughed. "You hate surprises or you hate my surprises?"
You looked away. "Look at the road, Lando."
After a minute or two, Lando spoke again. "You look really beautiful."
Once again, you blushed. Thankfully, it was starting to get dark. "You already said that."
He stopped at a red light, gazing intensely at you. "And if you allow me, I would say that to you every single day." For a moment, his intense gaze made your legs feel like jelly.
The tension was broken only by a car honking behind you. Lando raised his hand in apology and pulled away. Three minutes later, he pulled up at the marina.
"I agreed to a date with you, not to run off." He said, getting out of the car.
You unbuckled your seatbelt and Lando opened your door. He gently placed his hand on your back, barely touching it, and guided you towards a large yacht named Aurora.
"It's from a friend of mine." Lando said as he pulled you towards the yacht deck. "He named it after his baby daughter. He let me borrow it for a few hours." Your mouth gaped open in surprise at the sight of the table for two, beautifully set with roses and candles. "I thought you'd be more comfortable alone." He explained. "Without the prying eyes of strangers or paparazzi."
Once again, he'd left you speechless. The candlelight, the city view, the soft music, and the sound of the water hitting the yacht created breathtaking scenery.
"I didn't picture you as the romantic type." You said.
Lando put his hands in his pockets and looked at you. "I can be romantic… when I have to." You didn't respond, just stared at him. He had two buttons undone, revealing the tan of his chest and the necklace he wore. "Let's sit?" He suggested and you nodded.
He pulled out your chair, demonstrating his gentlemanly side. He sat down opposite you, and a moment later, a man in a black suit approached with a bottle of wine.
The man poured the wine for the two of you. You could tell it was a very expensive wine just by looking at the bottle.
"Cheers!" Lando said, raising his glass. You clinked your glass with his and took a sip. It was delicious. "Do you like it?"
You nodded. "Are you trying to get me drunk?"
Lando chuckled. "Far from it. I want you to stay sober and experience firsthand how great of a date I can create for you."
"You're really taking this seriously!"
"When I like someone, I always take things seriously." He said, his face turning serious. "I fight for what I want. And it's no lie that I want you."
You swallowed hard, trying to hide your emotions. Before you could respond, the food arrived. It was a pepperoni pizza for you and a prosciutto one for Lando.
"How-- how did you know--?"
Lando smiled. "You order a lot of pizzas. Like… a lot. So one day, I stopped the delivery guy and asked him what you had ordered. He said you always ordered the same one."
You tried to suppress a laugh at his silliness. "Not creepy at all." You said sarcastically.
Lando laughed. "I know, I know. But I wanted to do something nice for you."
You kept on talking and eating, and you both laughed a lot. You had to admit that you had never felt so comfortable with someone before. After you finished eating, Lando and you walked to the car.
"I'll take you home." he said. He turned on the car but paused. "Unless you don't want to go home yet." For a moment, he seemed shy, which was unlike him, at least around you.
You thought for a moment. "I don't know..." It surprised you that you were considering spending more time with him than necessary. "I'm not going home with you if that's what you're thinking."
Lando laughed. "Well, I guess I'll have to call you an Uber if you're not going home with me. Like, to the same building." You blushed and let out a sigh. He loved teasing you. "Do you trust me?"
You gave him a side look. "No!"
"Wow, that was brutal. Let me rephrase the question: Can I take you somewhere, please?"
You hesitated, but eventually nodded your head.
Lando drove to the top of the hill, a spot he liked to visit when everything felt overwhelming. The view was breathtaking. Monaco looked beautiful during the day, but it was at night when the city truly took your breath away. He parked the car, and you both stepped out.
"This is beautiful." You said, looking at the view.
"It is. But it's not as beautiful as you," Lando replied. You blushed and looked away. You'd never blushed so much in your life.
You sat down on the bench and Lando joined you. "What do you really want from me?" You asked, breaking the comfortable silence.
"What do you mean?" He replied.
"I'm not stupid, Lando. You're an F1 driver. You're young and handsome. You could have anyone you wanted."
"But I want you!" He smiled. "You're smart, funny, and incredibly beautiful. And you're different from the women I've dated in the past. You're genuine. Like I've already told you, I like you. A lot."
You looked at him, your heart filled with a mix of excitement and uncertainty. "I don't know, Lando."
He squeezed your hand gently. "I understand that I'm not the easiest guy to be in a relationship with, but I'm willing to take things slowly. I just want you to know how I feel." The two of you sat in silence for a while, simply enjoying each other's company. "Do you want to go back?" Lando asked after a while.
You nodded. "I think it's time."
As you drove back down the hill, you couldn't shake the feeling that something special was happening between you and Lando. You were excited, but also a little nervous.
When you arrived at your apartment building, Lando parked the car in the garage, but neither of you made a move to step out. "Thank you for tonight. I really enjoyed it." You said.
He smiled. "I'm glad you agreed."
"Well, I had no choice, remember?"
"Yeah. Remember me to thank Maria for the bet." He laughed, and you joined him.
"Yeah, yeah." After a while, you leaned in and kissed his cheek. It was a sweet kiss, and Lando closed his eyes as he felt your lips against his face.
As you pulled away, Lando hesitated, but after a second, he cupped your face and gently kissed you on the lips. Your heart raced, and you closed your eyes, quickly kissing him back and tangling your hand in his hair. He deepened the kiss, his lips moving slowly against yours. His touch was gentle, and you felt a warmth spread through you.
When you pulled away, you were both breathless. You looked at each other, your eyes filled with love and desire. "I've been wanting to do that, for a very long time." He said.
You looked into his eyes, your heart pounding in your chest. "To how many girls have you said that?" You teased him.
He looked at your lips. "None. And if you let me, you're going to be the only one." He said and he couldn't help but smile.
You smiled back. You couldn't help but think that your life had just taken a turn for the better. And so did Lando. Finally, he got the girl. The woman next door.
#f1#lando norris#lando norris x reader#lando x reader#lando norris x y/n#lando norris imagine#ln4 imagine#ln4 fic#ln4
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HSR characters as ways animals court and mate
Welcome to the (hopefully) weirdest biology lesson you'll ever have! Essentially a shitpost. I shouldn't be allowed near blorbos. There might be better suited animals, these are all my takes on the characters and animals picked from ones I knew.
Repost from my old blog so I added more characters as compensation.
Characters included: Sampo Koski, Veritas Ratio, Ruan Mei, Jing Yuan, Argenti, Sunday, Kafka, Caelus, Moze
Warnings: nsfw in the way a national geographic documentary is, there are no graphic details but proceed at your own discretion, breeding mention for Jing Yuan, Sampo's ridiculously large appendage, Caelus slander,
MINORS DO NOT INTERACT
Sampo Koski - Limax maximus (leopard slug)
Truly, few people are as slick as Mr. Koski. You might not even notice at first that you are being observed by a mysterious, handsome stranger. Sure, his methods may be a little on the unusual side, but he values being well-informed before acting. Once he does decide to act, you may find yourself in quite a few unfortunate situations, luckily, your good friend Sampo is there to help you out. He is quite well endowed in certain departments, but where others might feel shame or even outright fear for their partner's comfort, this ingenious entrepreneur prides himself on always having the right tools for the job. Rest assured, your comfort and pleasure is of the highest importance! Or, for the right price, he will gladly put himself on the receiving end to satisfy your desires. Limax maximus is somewhat unusual in its mating habits compared to other slugs. They also have a ridiculously large penises (largest observed being 92cm or 36 inches) - mind you, a snail's penis emerges from their gonopore which is located on the side of their head. The leopard slugs court by circling each other for hours before eventually climbing a tree, coiling around each other and producing a string of mucus to hang upside down from - letting gravity unfold their penises. Since these slugs are hermaphroditic, both receive a sperm package and goes on to lay eggs.
Veritas Ratio - Strix varia (barred owl)
While Veritas might not exactly be keen on grand gestures to express himself, your persistance in seeking him out and staying close does eventually lead to the realisation that his days wouldn't be the same without your presence. Though he prefers to save his words, there's never a shortage around you, always talking, asking, listening, engaging in conversation that only you can provide. The shift in behavior is endearing, Veritas becomes keen on inviting you home, cooking for and with you, bathing together (something that had been near unimaginable for him). His hands gravitate towards you as often as possible, either just resting there or rubbing tension from your muscles. He takes care of you and lets you take care of him. It's a beautiful everyday life, after all, why would he confine himself to expressing his love a few times a year, when he could do it every day in countless ways instead? Strix varia - as many owls - remains mostly monogamous, with the exception being in instances of younger, widowed birds. Their courtship usually involves the owl hen following around the male for a time before they both begin engaging in duets and mutual preening. Every year for a period of time before mating, the male will take up all hunting responsibilities and dote on his partner :3 These owls are also, compared to closely related species, known for disliking man-made nesting boxes (microbiome is inferior to a hollowed out tree trunk) and they're considered some of the most curious and polite predators.
Ruan Mei - Timema (genus of stick insects)
While you might be interested in Ruan Mei, chances are she won't be interested in the same sense. There is little time for such 'pleasantries' and even less willingness to make time for it. Whether she cannot, or doesn't want to, understand the concept of love, she recognises the value it holds in terms of reproduction and evolution. And even then, she has gone about creating life by herself just fine. So, perhaps she will let you into her bed for a night, but it's unlikely that she lets it lead to more. Members of the genus Timema primarily reproduce through the process of parthenogenesis (virgin birth), meaning they reproduce asexually and males are very few and far between. Sexual reproduction is incredibly rare and speculated to only be done by a few individuals to keep a diverse enough gene pool.
Jing Yuan - Panthera leo (lion)
It's no secret that Jing Yuan has had ample time and opportunity for sexual experiences. Nor is it any secret that he's attractive (which he's aware of), despite his long life, Jing Yuan appears to be in the prime of his life and health. All that experience doesn't make his time with you any less special, it simply means that your pleasure and desires are exceedingly important. Anything you could want to try he will indulge, of course, you'll have to tell him, use your words, even if the answer is written all over your face. The one thing he does often want to indulge for his own sake is finishing inside. Other than that, Jing Yuan is more than happy to lay back and watch as you pleasure yourself with him. If you ask, he's happy to help, he knows your body quite well by now - ah just don't ask him in the afternoon. He's napping. Male lions are - apart from on the rare occasions that they have to defend their territory - very relaxed individuals. The females hunt for him while he sleeps (and looks good). The mane serves as a 'sexual ornament' and shows off how 'healthy' a male is. A more pigmented mane means higher testosterone levels (Ignore the pigmentation part for Jing Yuan and just consider how healthy and well taken care of he looks). A few days before the female enters estrus, the male picks up on changes to her scent and starts following her around. Female lions are known for having incredible stamina during estrus, often to the point of tiring out the male to a point where he will try to stalk off and sleep. Also worth noting that lions have a barbed penis that scratches the vagina upon pulling out, this can cause the female to ovulate just like I would if Jing Yuan did me
Argenti - Panthera leo male x Panthera tigris female (Liger, hybrid)
A knigh of Beauty passing by, not exactly the smartest choice to throw your heart at, is it? Argenti is kind, chivalrous, perhaps a little odd, and beautiful. He sees in you a work of art, compliments you as though he has no choice but let the words flow. Unfortunately, he doesn't let anyone get close. Perhaps he will indulge you for a night, find pleasure in seeing you come undone while he remains clothed. There is no settling down for him, no family life, he swore an oath that he must keep. Ligers are incredibly rare and only found in captivity. As with other hybrids, ligers follow Haldane's rule meaning the heterogametic sex (in this case the male) is sterile. These hybrids are stunning creatures, highly social, and the biggest living cat. But there is no 'successful' mating for them. Reproductive behavior in females follow that of their parent species.
Sunday - Anthochaera phrygia (regent honeyeater)
Once Sunday becomes free to act for himself, it's not particularly hard to recognise his little displays of interest. They're sweet and awkward at best and downright embarrassing at worst. He tries his best - he truly does - by learning from those around him. Unfortunately, those people are now the Astral Express crew, and aeons above, some of them aren't great at flirting to begin with, but having Sunday attempt mimicry? Horrendous. Once he gets a little more confident (perhaps you should reassure him that you enjoy who he is) you can expect him to open up more. Expect his care and love to be presented with something akin to devotion. With time, perhaps he'll even sing for you? Unfortunately, regent honeyeaters are critically endangered. This is in part due to the loss of their unique song. During early life, birds spend months learning various calls that will be important for signalling. These are typically learned from the parents, but regent honeyeaters leave the nest before this happens and a loss of habitat meant fewer individuals to learn from. Males have begun copying other bird species, leading to significantly lower interest from females, accelerating their decline.
Kafka - Crocuta crocuta (spotted hyena)
So you're enamoured with Kafka? Difficult not to be, she truly just... has a certain appeal wouldn't you say? Approaching with care and submission rather than aggression will see your chances of success increase. Kafka is confident in herself and her abilities, knowing what path she walks and the destination. But that doesn't mean she won't indulge in a little fun from time to time, after all, the script she has doesn't dictate every single action. She's in control throughout it all, even in the occassion of you being allowed on top, there's still no doubt about the hierarchy. She would have every stellaron hunter ready to protect you if your safety is deemed worthwhile. The spotted hyena lives in highly complex social groups with females most often ranking higher than males. Anatomically, the spotted hyena females have developed a 'pseudo-penis' (very enlarged clitoris) complete with faux scrotum and testes that cover the vagina - making forced copulation by a male impossible. The female needs to retract the pseudo-penis which is also what the male will insert his into. Males that remain passive and subservient have higher chances of successful mating compared to aggressive ones.
Caelus - Ailuropoda melanoleuca (giant panda)
Teeny tiny penis. Caelus is very easily goaded into doing things, sometimes you don't even have to suggest a stupid idea before he's halfway done trying. Poor man has no idea what to do with himself the moment things turn spicy. Very cute, very sweet, probably good cuddles. But you're gonna need a toy. At around a whopping 3cm (~1 inch), the giant pandas aren't giant everywhere. Courtship can involve males doing a handstand against a tree and peeing as far up as possible to signal that he's near. Famously, giant pandas seemingly lose interest in mating when kept in captivity and there's been a lot of initiatives to figure out how to get the spark back (this includes showing them panda-porn and giving them an equivalent to viagra)
Moze - Canis lupus (grey wolf)
Though he may appear reserved (and a little scary even) once you get to know Moze, it quickly becomes clear that he just.. he has a certain way of showing his affection. It's almost like having gained a shadow with how he follows you around. At first, he may be more inclined to keep you away from any and all danger, but gradually warms up to the thought of being partners in every sense. His trust in you is absolute and nothing could sway his loyalty. Still, Moze does enjoy seeing you well taken care of (going so far as having Jiaoqiu give him lessons on your favourite foods). Once he loses himself in the pleasures of your body, it becomes near impossible for him to stop. All that careful control slips from his grasp until the moment you're both panting for breath and utterly exhausted. During those times, he wraps his arms securely around you, keeping you there for as long as he can justify. I think we all know how dogs mate, no? Mounting, knotting, all that. Wolves are monogamous and form tightly knit packs. Mated pairs are excellent at cooperating, both for hunting and raising pups. The male wolf hunts for the first couple of weeks after the female gives birth, making sure she can rest in the den and look after the young. Interestingly, the more newly bonded a pair is, the more frequently will the male scent mark their territory to dissuade any potential intruders.
Hsr masterlist
#didn't want to add any of the amphoreus cast because I haven't played the quest to end and even then#it wouldn't be enough for me to be comfortable with picking an animal lmao#anyway sorry for the repost - i hope the three added characters can make up for it just a little#hsr x reader#honkai star rail x reader#sampo x reader#dr ratio x reader#ruan mei x reader#jing yuan x reader#argenti x reader#sunday x reader#kafka x reader#caelus x reader#moze x reader#hsr fanfic#crow with a pen
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Breaking Point Chapter 4
Whitebeard Pirates x Teen GN Reader
7.2k words
First / Prev
Summary: Akainu realizes he has been duped, Whitebeard has a conversation with the mystery caller, and you are left facing your most dire foe yet. Boredom.
Warnings: choking, suicidal ideation, brief mentions of anxiety, depression, and self harm, descriptions of past child abuse, invasion of privacy, brief pregnancy mention
I made some major changes to chapter one since the last update, so please make sure to go reread it if you haven't already. Enjoy the extra long chapter lol
tap tap tap tap tap tap tap tap tap tap tap
A trench was going to be imprinted upon the deck at this rate. Akainu couldn't stand still. Not when his mind was racing in every direction all at once.
Those pirates are fucking late.
Akainu stops sharply and shouts up to the crow's nest, “Can you still not see them?”
“No, sir! There's no one around for miles!”
His blood may very well be literally boiling. A vein in his forehead throbs uncomfortably, and he can hear a faint sizzling coming from somewhere on his person.
A hesitant, meek voice calls out to him, “The wind is pretty weak today, sir. Maybe they're just running behind because of that?”
“That didn't stop us from getting here on time!” Akainu snaps at the marine. He stomps closer to the man, easily matching his hasty steps back until he is towering over him. “They are damn near five hours late, and you want to blame it on the fucking wind?! What's next? Did they stop at an island because they were hungry, too? What other excuses are you going to make for those things?!”
“I-I-I wasn't trying to excuse them, sir, I promise!” The marine is bent backwards over the railing in a desperate bid to put some distance between them. “It's just- I have a kid at home, too! I know that I would be worried sick if I was in your shoes, so I was trying to say something encouraging!”
Akainu grabs the man's neckerchief and yanks him closer, not caring to notice that he was choking him in the process, “I don't need encouragement, I need those damned pirates to keep their end of their deal and get here already!”
“I'm sorry, sir!” The marine was clawing at the fabric around his neck and wheezing.
Such a pathetic display. Whatever. He wasn't worth the effort of dispatching. Akainu shoves him away, nearly sending him over the railing and into the sea.
The seething Admiral turns to face the bridge, “Return to port, they aren't coming.”
Surprise flashes across the helmsman's face. “Are you sure, Admiral?”
“Positive.” Akainu strides to where his private office is, “The longer we waste time here, the more time they have to scheme. We are returning at once.”
He doesn't wait for a response. His crew knows better than to disappoint him. He can hear a flurry of boots hitting wood as everyone rushes to unfurl the sails and raise anchor.
It's only because he's on a ship that he can't afford to sink that he's able to keep his magma in check. He can feel the flow of it under his skin, just begging to be unleashed. But, alas, he would be stranding himself in the ocean if he did.
He's too fired up to even consider sitting down right now. He rips open the drawer that his transponder snail is in and tunes it to the desired frequency before sending out the call. It rings twice, then the gruff voice of his superior answers.
“Let me guess. They never arrived.” Despite the conversation having only just started, Sengoku already sounded exasperated.
Akainu inhaled deeply in a vague attempt to calm himself. “They didn't. They violated the terms of our agreement.”
“Pirates didn't keep their word? How surprising. Should I tell the papers about this?”
Sarcasm was the last thing that Akainu wanted to put up with right now. His hand tightens around the receiver and he spits out, “This isn't a joking matter. My (Y/N) is still with them, and I haven't been given any proof of life since the initial communication.”
“I'm aware.” The sound of papers being shuffled followed by pen on paper trickles in from his side.
Teeth grind against each other painfully to the point that he should be concerned about cracking a molar, but he can't be bothered to focus on such a thing. “Is that all you have to say? That Emperor is holding a Commodore hostage, and all you can say is that you're aware?”
“An ex-Commodore.” Sengoku says plainly, as if it was nothing of note. Like he just fired a janitor. “I've already taken the liberty of terminating their position and reallocating their unit.”
“You can't be serious. You better not be serious.” The nails on Akainu’s free hand dig into the varnished wood of his desk and smoke begins to rise.
“I am. You were made privy to my stance on this matter beforehand. (Y/N) abandoned post and got themselves captured. That isn't the kind of behavior I want to see in an Ensign, much less a Commodore.” The sound of a pen being dropped can be heard. “And just in case you need to be reminded, my decision still stands on not permitting any action against Whitebeard. A civilian isn't worth that effort or trouble.”
The wood of his desk smolders, then catches to fire. “Do you honestly expect me to do nothing about this? Am I just supposed to leave (Y/N) in the hands of pirates and not do a single fucking thing to retrieve them? Is that genuinely what you are expecting of me?”
A deep sigh can be heard through the receiver. After a bout of silence, Sengoku speaks again, “I understand that this is your child, and that you have a duty to them as a parent. But, you also have a duty to the Marines. You have a duty to not upset the delicate balance between us and the Emperors. There is only room for one of those duties to be your top priority.
“I'm not going to reprimand you for being distressed, but I hope that you will make the correct decisions going forward. You're an excellent Admiral, and I want to help you where I can, but I can't continue covering your ass when you let your desires and impulses control you. You need to be wholly dedicated to the greater good, and let's be honest here, (Y/N) is no longer a part of that category.”
Sengoku allows him time to stew in what was said. To take it all in and try to force himself to come to terms with it. But he can't. This isn't right. You have always been a star soldier. You've given your life to the cause, and now you're getting chewed up and spit out because you were overpowered by a fucking Emperor.
“If it's any consolation,” Sengoku pauses as he carefully chooses his next words, “I anticipate that (Y/N) will be released eventually. Of all the pirate crews that could have abducted them, the Whitebeard pirates are about as tame as one can hope for. They don't have a history of executing hostages. Once they realize they've gotten as much out of this situation as they can, I'm sure (Y/N) will be released without incident.”
Loath as he was to admit it, Sengoku had a point. If a crew like Beast pirates had gotten ahold of you, it would practically be guaranteed that you would die in their custody. The Whitebeard's, as powerful as they were, didn't pose the same risk level. The worst that had ever happened involving them and Marines outside of direct warfare was the occasional conversion, but he knew that you would never fall for such a ruse. You were far too independent and intelligent to be tricked like that.
But even if you were released, that still begged the question, “Will you reinstate (Y/N)’s position once they've been returned?”
“What?” Sengoku sounds completely flabbergasted, “No. Where did you get the idea that I would? I already explained why (Y/N) is no longer fit for the Marines. Were you not listening to a word I said the other day?”
“I heard you, but that doesn't mean that I agreed with it. You aren't being fair. Anyone of their skill level would have lost against those pirates. I know my soldier, and I know that they have what it takes to do good for the Marines. You can't cut their career short before they've even reached their maximum potential.” Akainu exhales sharply and drags his hand down his face, “What would they even do if they weren't a marine? They would have nothing.”
The sound of Sengoku drumming his fingers makes it through the transmission. “(Y/N) is a sharp individual, I know that they would succeed in anything they applied themselves to. I did them and you a favor and labeled them as an honorable discharge. They should have no trouble finding employment elsewhere.”
That answer wasn't good enough. Akainu didn't want you to wander around until you found something else to do to get by. He wanted you to stay in the Marines and do what he knew you were meant to do. This is all so frustrating, he feels like he's talking in circles.
Without thinking, he barks into the receiver, “What's the damn point if they can't even be a marine?”
The drumming coming through the line stops instantly. “Pardon?” He can hear Sengoku's chair creak, followed by a hand slamming down on the desk, “The damn point is that you'll have your kid back alive and well! The point is that you won't be left to wonder what became of them as your mind fills in the blanks with nothing but worst case scenarios! You could stand to be a little more grateful for the fact that you have a very good chance of being able to see your kid again!”
Indistinct words are grumbled under the Fleet Admiral’s breath. He inhales deeply, then lets it out. He speaks clearly and concisely, “I'm done with this conversation. Do not bring this up to me again.” The line went dead.
This didn't feel real. It was like a nightmare. He's worked so hard to get you to where you were, and now Sengoku has callously ripped it all away based purely off assumption. Was his life's work not good enough to be worth fighting for? Was he insinuating that Akainu had raised a useless marine?
Did he have any idea how bad this would make Akainu look?
There's a tug on his hand. His transponder snail is trying to escape the flames encapsulating the desk but is being held back by the receiver still in his grasp.
… It would be inconvenient to have to make a trip just to acquire a new one.
Akainu picks up the snail and drops it onto a nearby shelf. He stares at the burning desk with apathy. Was there anything important in it? Probably not. Some paperwork at most.
Glass cracks and then shatters loudly. His eyes dart over to the source of the noise. A framed photo of you that was taken after your recent promotion to Commodore. Oh, shit! He lurches forward to try and salvage it, but he's too late. The picture singes and curls in his hands as flames consume it.
Your emotionless face distorts, then vanishes as it's reduced to a pile of ash.
—
Everyone had left the room upon Whitebeard's request to do so. Now it was just him, the transponder snail, and whoever was on the other side of this transmission.
Whitebeard situates himself comfortably and speaks in the commanding voice expected of someone of his status, “We're alone now. You can speak.”
There's a beat of silence, then a stern but feminine voice comes through, “Captain Whitebeard. I appreciate you agreeing to speak with me regarding this urgent matter.”
“It isn’t often that someone from Totto Land wants to speak to me. May I know whom I'm speaking to?” He was running all of the voices of Big Mom's children that he knew through his head, but none of them were a match. It could be one of her daughters that he hadn't met before, or maybe his memory simply wasn't as sharp as it used to be.
“You may have heard of me under the alias of Ms. Edmonds. I used to work with various pirates by giving them insider information on the Marines, but I've worked exclusively with Charlotte Linlin for some time now.”
Whitebeard had heard the name floating around several years back. A former disgraced marine turned informant, either out of spite or genuine necessity based on who you asked. The question still stood on why she was so insistent on getting in contact with him, and what exactly his most recent addition to the ship had to do with it.
“Is (Y/N) still aboard your ship?” Her voice had a noticeable tinge of desperation to it.
His arms cross over his chest and he leans back in his chair. “They are. They’re on the deck with my sons as we speak.”
A loud sigh of relief comes from Ms. Edmonds. Seemingly encouraged by his response, she begins speaking at a fast pace, “Whitebeard, I must implore you to not return (Y/N) to Marine custody. I am prepared to pay whatever ransom you deem necessary. Treasure, medicine, I could even connect you with new potential crew members. Just name it, and I will make it happen.”
“I have already decided that (Y/N) won’t be going back to the Marines.”
There’s a brief moment of silence, then a quiet, “Huh?”
“(Y/N) made it clear that they didn’t want to go back. I’m not in the business of forcing people to do things against their will, much less a child.” Whitebeard leaves the explanation vague. Ms. Edmonds hasn’t shown her hand yet, so he has no reason to either. She’s given him no reason to divulge precisely why he’s made the decision that he has. “What I want right now is to know why you are so invested in that child. I take it Big Mom is interested in them?”
A few theories are swirling in his mind, but one was especially prominent. It wouldn't surprise him in the least if Big Mom was interested in getting a turn using you as a bargaining chip. Linlin loved having leverage over others, and she no doubt knew that she could get a lot out of having you in her custody.
If that is the case, she is going to be sorely disappointed. He has zero intention of putting you in harm's way or triggering another attempt. You aren't going anywhere.
There is a lengthy pause as Ms. Edmonds mulls over her next words, and Whitebeard doesn't rush her.
She lets out a deep breath, then finally breaks the silence, “I'm their mother. I'm sure you've heard the… unsavory rumors about me. I was dishonorably discharged when the affair I was having with my superior came to light after I discovered I was pregnant during a medical exam.”
A bitter chuckle comes through the connection, “They raked me over the coals. Called me every name in the book and told me I had no right to my own child. They took (Y/N) from me the second they were born. I've never so much as held them.”
None of this had been what Whitebeard had been anticipating. Her story was extreme, so much so that he was dubious of how honest she was being. Especially since she had yet to give a real name. “Do you have any proof for this story?”
“I do.” Her words are firm and confident, “I managed to snag my file before I was thrown out on my ass. It includes details about everything I described to you. It will be under the name of Portgas D. Louise, and I can send it over to you right now if you will let me.”
Whitebeard wasn’t sure which struck him harder. Her having the same surname as his son, Ace, or the fact that she just admitted to having the Will of D. And if this tale turns out true, that would imply that you do as well. If he had to guess, you didn’t even know this about yourself.
This situation is becoming increasingly complicated by the second. It’s an insane story, but something in him is telling him that it’s true. He concedes, “Yes, I would appreciate it if you could send it to me at your earliest convenience.”
The woman, who he now knows to be Louise, can be heard shouting orders to mail the file to Whitebeard right away. The voice of the other person is too far away to be made out, but he does pick up on the sound of a door opening and closing.
“Thank you so much for being willing to entertain this. If it’s not too much to ask, I have another favor to request from you.” Louise’s voice is tentative as she asks.
“Go ahead.” Whitebeard can about guess what she’s after.
“I need to see my child. It may have been a bit presumptuous, but I have already begun preparations of a ship to make the voyage to get to yours. Can I trust that I will have your continued cooperation and that I’ll be allowed entry onto your ship?”
Whitebeard lets the question hang in the air as he thinks it over. It will likely be a few days before the evidence gets to him, but if Louise is coming all the way from Totto Land, there will be a wide margin of time for him to lose them if the proof proves itself to be illegitimate. He nods to himself and answers, “Yes, you will have our continued cooperation so long as the evidence confirms your story.”
She lets out a loud sigh of relief, as if she’d been holding her breath. “Thank you. You have no idea how much this means to me.”
“Think nothing of it.” At this point, he had as much of an interest in seeing this woman as she did in seeing her child.
Just as he was planning to end the communication, Louise speaks up again, “... How is (Y/N)? Are they well?” Ah. He had admittedly been hoping to avoid this question. He pauses to try and gather his thoughts, and it doesn’t go unnoticed. Her voice takes on a more urgent tone, “What’s wrong? Are they hurt?”
“Not physically… but I’m not sure that I can say that they are well, either.”
Louise urges him again, “What’s wrong?”
“It’s upsetting.”
That gives her pause, but she presses on, “My life has been upsetting. Tell me what’s going on with (Y/N). I’m their mother, I have the right to know.”
“Very well,” Whitebeard relents. He takes a moment to attempt to find the most delicate way to say what he needed to, but there simply isn’t a nice way of putting it. He’s just going to have to come right out and say it. “When we were still planning on trading (Y/N) for safe passage to and from an island, they became despondent. After they were told that they would be back with their father soon, they went into a panic. They managed to wrestle a knife away from someone… and then they attempted to end their life.”
Silence. He can’t even make out the sound of her breathing anymore. After a few seconds, he hears some shuffling and the flick of a lighter, followed by a long inhale. She exhales shakily, and her voice tremors just as much, “How hurt are they?”
“Ace caught the blade before they could do any damage. They are unharmed, and we have them under a constant watch to ensure it stays that way. (Y/N) is in good hands, I can promise you that much.”
“Ace…” Louise mumbles something under her breath that he can’t quite make out. She clears her voice. “Okay. Thank you for informing me. I need to leave to assist with preparations for our ship. I’ll be in contact with you later.”
He reaches forward to terminate the call, but she interrupts him, “Oh, one more thing. I don’t want you to tell (Y/N) that I’m coming. I don’t know what- if anything- they’ve been told about me. I would prefer to be there to plead my case in person rather than letting them stew in whatever Akainu has told them about me.”
The call comes to an end before he even has a chance to respond. She apparently had a good deal of faith that he would honor that request. Which she wasn’t wrong about. He would. You already had too much on your mind as it stands, he didn’t need to be adding more to your plate. The transponder snail’s eyes shut, and it promptly retreats back into its shell for a much needed nap after the lengthy back and forth.
Whitebeard leans back in his seat to take in everything that he just heard. While he still wanted to see the proof for himself, he already felt certain that Louise was telling the truth about who she was in relation to you. Frankly, the bigger question to him was who she was to Ace.
And what Big Mom was hoping to get out of this.
—
There have been many complicated hurdles in your life. Brutal training sessions, unforgiving missions, merciless foes, but now you’re facing a whole new beast.
Boredom.
Due to how heavily structured your life was as a marine, you were never left wondering what you should do. Everything was already pre-established ahead of time, and there wasn’t a single second that was unaccounted for. So what were you supposed to do when that schedule was ripped away from you?
During those few weeks on the run, you had been away from your usual routine, but you were kept plenty busy with surviving and making sure your path would be an untraceable one. But now? Now you have nothing to do, and it’s driving you crazy!
It’s been two days since your capture by the Whitebeard pirates, and it has been a wild ride.
Marco returned last night with the medication they used you as leverage to get. True to Elise’s word, he did not proceed to immediately drag you back to the Marines. Instead, what followed was a private interrogation between you and him where he asked you all sorts of invasive questions.
At first they were pretty tame. Have you eaten? How much? What has your sleep schedule been like recently? Then it started to get more uncomfortable. Do you have a history with depression? Do you often find yourself feeling anxious?
And then he asked the question that you knew was coming. Are you having any thoughts of self harm or suicide?
All of your answers were short. This wasn’t an exchange that you wanted to entertain. You gave vague answers where you could, and outright lied when you couldn’t. None of this was any of his damn business. And what the hell kinds of questions were these? Do you have a history of depression? As if you could have done everything you did as a marine if you were depressed and anxious. How absurd.
And self harm? Please. Akainu harmed you plenty. Why would you do more than that unless it was to end it all? Of course, you still had the desire to do just that, but there was no opportunity to. These people were watching you constantly.
There was a rotation of nurses that stayed up to watch you as you slept all night. If you wanted to go to the bathroom, someone had to be with you. A humiliating experience, but at least the nurses had the decency to turn their back. You declined to bathe last night because of that whole experience. You did not want to be completely naked around these people. Fuck that noise.
Ever since your release from the confines of the medical gurney, you’ve been hovering around the nurses. You didn’t exactly trust them, but they felt safer to be around than any of the pirates. In an attempt to stave off your boredom, you’ve taken to helping the nursing staff out. Cleaning medical equipment, organizing supplies, washing laundry for the infirmary. It kept you busy last night and into the morning, but they eventually ran out of things for you to do and even went so far as to shoo you out of the infirmary with orders to “relax already”, whatever that meant.
Ah, yes. You’re just going to kick back and chill out around a bunch of savage pirates that hunt your kind for sport. Who wouldn’t do that? What a silly goose you are for your apprehensions!
Much like yesterday, all of the pirates were being weird as all hell. The act they had going on yesterday was still in full swing. They were all pretending to be friendly with you and drag you into their games and hobbies to lower your guard. Thatch tried luring you into the kitchen under the guise of showing you how to make bread. You declined. His division had probably been lying in wait to stab you to death with kitchen knives. You wouldn’t give them the satisfaction. You’d much rather die by your hand than theirs, thank you very much.
The rest of the crew followed suit. Izou tried waving you over when he was making tea. A group of them tried to get you to join them in fishing over the side of the ship. Ace attempted to get you to play a game of cards with him. Admittedly, you had almost agreed to that one just to distract yourself, but you held strong.
Presently, you were sitting against the railing, staring blankly up at the sky while absent-mindedly fiddling with the seastone cuff on your wrist. Marco hadn’t taken it off. Your lackluster response to his questions were probably to thank for that. At least the IV was removed. You’d been anticipating a rush of energy and increased alertness now that there wasn’t a steady stream of presumed sedatives flowing into you, but that had yet to come. You felt just as aloof as you were. You suppose that the seastone exposure was preventing you from fully recovering.
This location choice of yours seemingly had the pirates on edge. You were still being watched closely, that much was obvious. As soon as you approached the taffrail, Namur abruptly declared that he was going for a swim. So killing yourself by diving over the edge was a no-go.
“You look bored.”
There went your peace and solitude. You look over to your left to find a Division Commander looming over you with a smile on his face. It goes to show how desensitized you’ve become that all you felt in response to a clear threat was annoyance.
Swift-Saber Haruta. You’ve seen his face on wanted posters, and you recall him being in the crowd yesterday, but this is your first time interacting with him directly. You aren’t interested in making a good first impression. You scowl at him, “What the hell do you want?”
It does nothing to dissuade him. He laughs and hops up onto the railing, “You sound like Ace when he first got here.”
“Don’t compare me to some damned pirate.” You scoff at the observation. How insulting.
“Sorry, I didn’t mean to hurt your marine pride,” his mocking tone indicated that he was anything but.
That word bothers you, too. You huff and bring your knees to your chest while mumbling, “Don’t call me that…”
“What? Are you not a marine?”
“Not anymore.” Those days were long behind you. Arguably, you never really were a marine. Not in spirit. Not in the way that someone like Garp was. You never had the passion, the drive. You put in the effort, but it was just an obligation to you. A job that you were forced to do under duress of what would happen to you if you dared to underperform.
“Oh?” Haruta inches closer to you on the rail, “You want to elaborate on that?”
“Not at all, thanks.” You lean against the bars of the railing again and close your eyes, hoping that he’ll take the hint and leave.
That doesn’t happen. Haruta lightly nudges you with his leg, “Okay, well if you don’t want to do that, how about sparring?”
“What?” Did you mishear him? Your eyes open, then narrow at him.
“Vista’s usually the one I spar with, but he’s busy, so I was wondering if you wanted to take his place?” He looks to you, and when all you do is stare at him in confusion, he continues, “You don’t have to, I just thought you might want something to do. It’s your call.”
Sparring with a pirate would be a horrible idea. Suicidal, really. Lucky for him, that’s exactly what you are. You feign confliction, then sigh, “Sure, fine. Why not?”
“Great!” Haruta drops down from the railing and holds a hand out to you. You ignore it and stand up on your own. If he’s insulted by the display, he masks it well. He nods his head to the side, “The room we use for sparring is just over there, follow me.”
You trail behind him slowly in an effort to look casual and not like you’re planning to grab the first weapon you can get ahold of and use it on yourself. He doesn’t appear to be monitoring you as closely as the others. If you make it quick, you should be able to succeed.
As soon as you’re inside the sparring room, your mood sours. There are weapons here, but they’re all wood. Fuck. Taking yourself out via bluntforce trauma isn’t technically an impossible feat, but it would be difficult to do quick enough to be effective. You’ll either be stopped before you’re done, or you’ll just knock yourself out and have nothing more than a splitting headache to show for it.
Should you leave? You don’t really want to be here anymore.
“Any preference?” Haruta is standing by a wall lined with wooden swords.
… Well, this does beat being bored. You sigh and join him by the wall, “My specialty is hand to hand combat, but I’m well versed in many weapons.” You grab the nearest sword, one designed to resemble a cutlass. Standard issue for marines. It’s one of the first weapons you learned to use.
“Works for me.” Haruta picks up a wooden sword of his own and walks to the center of the room, “I’ll go easy on you since you’ve still got that cuff on you.”
You scoff, “Don’t you dare. I’m just as capable with this thing on as I am otherwise.” That was a boldfaced lie. You’ve been lethargic ever since it was slapped onto your wrist. But your pride couldn’t handle being seen as weak regardless of whether or not you had what could be considered a valid excuse.
The attempt to talk tough fell flat. Haruta chuckles at your response. “How feisty, you really are like Ace. Are you sure you two aren’t related?”
“Keep talking like that. See where it gets you.” You meet him in the center of the room and raise your sword into a front guard.
Haruta raises his sword, but when he fails to make the first move, you lunge at him and thrust the sword toward his chest. He easily parries and sheds the attack, then advances toward you with a strike of his own. A clean and beautifully executed riposte that has you retreating.
His smile remains, “You’re only making my case for me by talking like that, you know?”
“Shut up.” Such a witty retort. You’re really bringing your A game here. You guard yourself against an onslaught of attacks from your opponent. Much to your chagrin, you can tell that he’s holding back. This slow speed is nowhere near what you’ve heard he’s capable of, yet you find yourself struggling to hold your own regardless.
He shrugs nonchalantly, “What? I like to talk when I’m sparring. Give me something else to focus on if you don’t like the subject.”
You feint an attack to the left, then strike from the right, making him step back and successfully regaining some ground. Sparring has never been a social affair for you, but you’d rather entertain his request than continue being subjected to him spouting off his inane observations and speculations over your heritage.
Conversational skills have never been your forte. What do people usually talk about? The weather? Themselves? You pick the latter and run with it, “How did you end up among pirates? According to your file, you used to be a prince. That’s quite the dramatic career shift.”
Haruta brings his free hand to his face and closes his eyes, “Aww, you’ve been keeping tabs on little old me?” Despite his eyes being shut, he was still expertly deflecting your attacks.
“Don’t flatter yourself. The Marines keep tabs on all pirates, especially when they’re associated with an Emperor.” You charge forward to try and overwhelm him, but he disengages you with a circle parry and sends you stumbling back. Damn it all, he’s making a fool out of you! You grit your teeth and correct your stance, “Are you going to answer my question, or are you going to deflect that, too?”
“Temper, temper!” He laughs and backs off slightly, which only enrages you further. He isn’t taking you seriously at all. “I will answer it, so hold your horses. And straighten your feet while you’re at it, you’re going to trip over them again.”
This fucker. You straighten your feet, furious that he was right about your footwork being off. Your strikes become more aggressive, but your foe remains unphased. “Did you leave to become a criminal out of boredom? Were you too good for your cushy lifestyle?”
“Eh, something like that,” Haruta stands his ground, blocking each attack with a practiced ease, “but it had more to do with my father.”
That answer wasn’t what you had been expecting. “What? Did he make you leave?” That didn’t line up with the file. The king had put in a request to the Marines the day Haruta vanished, so it would seem that he did want the prince around. He wouldn’t have offered up such a handsome reward for his capture otherwise.
Haruta shrugs, “In a sense, I suppose.” He begins countering your attacks again. “He kept saying that I wasn’t doing enough. No matter what I did, he had a problem with it. My sword fighting skills weren’t good enough, my academics weren’t good enough, my etiquette around the other nobles wasn’t good enough, nothing was. So, since I was such a disgrace in his eyes, I did him a favor and left.”
A pang of familiarity thrums through you. Memories of Akainu criticizing, but never complimenting reared their ugly head. You didn’t appreciate the reminder.
He frowns and rolls his eyes exasperatedly, “And you would think that he’d appreciate that, but no! He got mad about that, too. There’s just no pleasing some people, am I right?”
That was painfully true. It made you feel strange to hear such a sentiment from a pirate. Since when were pirates relatable? You shake your head and throw yourself back into the match. You don’t want to dwell on that, “So did Whitebeard immediately pick you up like some sort of posh stray?”
“Ha, no! I was on my own for a while after that. Around a year, I think? I got by as a bounty hunter, and that worked pretty well for me.” He retreats in small steps as he takes your flurry of attacks. “But then I got a little too big for my breeches. I got greedy and thought for sure that I could take on one of these guys. Thatch seemed like easy pickings. I thought, oh, he’s just a chef, how tough can he be?”
Your swords clash again, and he holds strong as you put your full weight into trying to make him budge. He continues speaking as if this wasn’t a strain on him in the slightest, “As it turns out: very tough. He made a fool out of me and had me disarmed and on my ass in a matter of seconds.”
Haruta pivots sharply, and the sudden absence of resistance sends you tumbling forward. Your arms flail as your torso tips forward in a desperate effort to regain balance. It works, and you right yourself and whip around, visibly frazzled. Your combatant chuckles, “I bet I looked a lot like you do right now.”
Bastard. Why must he insist on comparing you to pirates? You scramble to correct your stance. He lets you, which has you feeling more angry than grateful. You were nothing more than a joke to him. You lunge forward and cut down at him, but he easily avoids it with a fade.
“Your story doesn’t make any sense,” you all but snarl at him. “I asked you how you ended up with the Whitebeard’s, and you tell me a tale of trying to kill one of them. You wouldn’t be here if that was true.”
“Come now, do you really think me a liar? You wound me.” Oh, how you wish you could! Calling his previous move a fade had been a mistake on your end, he quickly revealed it to be an empty one when he leapt forward again. You just barely manage to parry it in time. “I’m telling the truth! After my humiliating defeat, pops offered to let me become his son.
“I couldn’t wrap my head around it. Like you said, it didn’t make sense. He just saw me lose a fight spectacularly after trying to take the head of one of his sons, yet he wanted to keep me around? I thought for sure that it was some cruel joke or a plot to finish me off.” Haruta kept yapping carelessly, yet you couldn’t find a single opening. If you could just rip this fucking cuff off, you would be able to make him take you seriously, you’re sure of it!
“I acquiesced, but more so out of a morbid sense of curiosity than anything. For weeks I kept waiting for the other shoe to drop. Weeks turned to months, and now I’ve been here for years.”
This story was so baffling that you stopped just to stare at him, “And they just… let you? They were okay with what you did?”
Haruta lightly taps your sword to get you back in the game. Akainu would have taken such an opportunity to show you what exactly happens to someone when they lose focus like that. You’ve got scars for making that mistake around him. Why didn’t this pirate add to your collection of marks?
While you’re floundering in internal confusion, Haruta carries on, entirely unbothered, “I mean, I guess so? One attempt on Thatch was nothing in the grand scheme of things. Ace tried to kill pops like a hundred times, and he’s still here.”
“He fucking what?”
Rather than calling your attention back to the fight, your opponent exploits your shock. Before you can even blink, he hooks his sword around yours and breaks it from your grasp. Your weapon is sent clattering across the floor, and you fall down with it. The thin mat on the floor does little to cushion your fall, but it’s not too bad. Nothing you can’t walk off. Your pride is infinitely more bruised by this than you are.
There’s a gentle tap of cool wood on your sweat dampened neck, “Looks like I won this round.” You glance up and find Haruta grinning down at you. “You aren’t bad, but you could use some more practice. I’m guessing you didn’t keep up with sword fighting much since you prefer hand to hand, right?”
“Something like that…” It was exactly like that. Upon reflection, you’d only ever been shown the basics of other weaponry. Hand to hand combat was the only thing that you ever trained in consistently since that was also what Akainu favored. Your skill level in any weapon that wasn’t yourself simply couldn’t hold a candle to a real master.
A hand is held out to you. Haruta had a relaxed smile on his face as he waited to see what you would do. It was a stark contrast to the rage that would be plastered over Akainu’s face when you collapsed. Akainu would yell at you for the pathetic display. Akainu would kick you across the room if you didn’t get up fast enough, not caring if a rib or two was cracked in the process.
But Haruta wanted to help you to your feet.
You take his hand, and it proves itself to not be a trick. He pulls you into a standing position without incident. That doesn’t prevent you from taking a step back after he does. You aren’t about to be too lax around him.
“That was fun!” Haruta is practically beaming. It’s unclear why. You know damn well that you didn’t pose any real challenge to him. What was a full body workout for you was little more than a warmup for him. “Same time tomorrow?”
He… wants to do this again? He wants to spar with you more? Well, referring to this session as sparring was generous. He no doubt had to have felt as if he had taken on the role of a teacher, and with a very unimpressive student at that.. There was absolutely nothing for him to gain from engaging with you in this way. Yet he wanted to.
“... Sure.” You avert your eyes and pick at your nails. “If I don’t have anything better to do.”
“Excellent! I look forward to it!” Haruta slings an arm over your shoulder and brings you into his side as he makes way for the exit. You’re forced to walk awkwardly alongside him.
What the hell was he doing? You squirm against him, “Knock that off. I can’t walk with you holding onto me like this.”
Rather than relinquishing you, his arm tightens. One of his hands pinches your cheek as he speaks in a taunting tone, “You can’t? Ah, well, I suppose that isn’t too surprising. You could barely walk straight when we were sparring.”
“You asshole-” You flail in his grasp and manage to shove him away. You choose to tell yourself that it was because you overpowered him, and not because he let you.
Haruta laughs at your agitation, no remorse in sight. Piece of shit. How dare he? You storm away from him in a huff, eager to get the hell out of this room and away from him. When you look up at the door, you find it cracked open with several heads peeking through.
Ace, Marco, and Elise are all blatantly spying on you. How long have they been there? How much of that did they see? Your face heats up and you snap at them, “What are you three looking at?! Go away!”
Nonsense. This day was utterly ridiculous!
Taglist: @twotrucksinatree @tigerstarstorm @mu5hro0m @brooks-real @one-piecelover @ratchetprime211 @ithoughtthinks @simpfor2dpeoole @vinillies @selfindulgenceisthekey @deleted-1-800 @weirdothatreads @eravariety @qhevy
#yandere one piece#one piece x reader#one piece#one piece x y/n#one piece x you#akainu sakazuki#akainu sakazuki x reader#sengoku the buddha#whitebeard one piece#whitebeard x reader#marco the phoenix x reader#marco the phoenix#portgas d ace#portgas d ace x reader#thatch one piece#thatch x reader#izou one piece#izou x reader#namur one piece#haruta one piece#x reader#reader insert
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The Pirate King of the North: Part 4
Main Themes: Villain Sanji, Alternate Universe, Zosan Ship
Warning: Long post ahead with One Piece spoilers. Contains strong language and explicit content.
Part 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 | 16 | 17 | 18 (Special) | 19
Three days after the call, Sanji follows Zoro’s instructions to the book and waits for him at an island with a bustling town in the middle of the day. The blonde is well aware of the local Marine base in the area but he ignores this fact and turns up at the townsquare just as he promised, not wanting to disappoint his, hopefully, future fiance. Unsurprisingly, he is met by navy officers who tell him to come along quietly.
Law had refused to use The Polar Tang to contain their guest as he didn’t want to risk his submarine and crew to suffer any potential consequences as a result of the interrogation that they're planning. Zoro had to pull strings to borrow a room at the Marine base, stating that it’s for an official Warlord business. He and the doctor had been waiting for over half an hour overtime for the soldiers to return with Sanji. Zoro sends additional troops to investigate the delay. After another suspicious amount of time of having received no news, the two decide to investigate the matter themselves.
Zoro and Law make their way to the townsquare where the swordsman had instructed Sanji to be. Upon arrival, it was clear what had happened to the navy soldiers that he’d sent out. Deep red and severed body parts taint the white tiles throughout the block. A few had somehow made their way on top of trees and the shops’ window sills. Some float lifelessly in the fountain right in the middle–its sprinkling water had changed to a scarlet red. Liquid splatters grossly against the white marble sculptures that decorated the water feature.
Law grits his teeth, his knuckles turn white from gripping his sword tightly.
Zoro all but rolls his eyes. He hates the fact that he’s used to Sanji doing this sort of thing.
Zoro
What a waste.
They follow a trail. It’s not hard to find where Sanji had gone given how much blood there was, and Zoro had a sneaking suspicion that the blonde had purposely left his stained footprints to show where he’s going. He enjoys Zoro chasing him this way after all.
While walking, Law sends a message through his own den-den mushi to his crew, ordering them to check in on the citizens and make sure that everyone’s safe. Not long after, Bepo reports that the citizens are unharmed–extremely shaken but they’re untouched. The polar bear adds that a few witnesses say that it was only the Marines who tried to force the Pirate King into cuffs that had been torn apart. Some had apparently been allowed to flee.
Law looked to Zoro, as if expecting him to have a reasonable explanation as to why the Pirate King behaves the way he does. Cutting down local town Marines seems a bit too excessive in his opinion. The swordsman confesses that he's just as confused, and that over the years he'd just accepted that he's just mad because it's just the way he was born.
Zoro
All the more reason he deserves to die.
Zoro stops in his tracks, standing on the wooden pier of the docks. It looks like the rest of the bloody footprints lead right through to the very end. Looking at the ocean, he sees a distinct murky area of red on one spot. A head of blonde and white hair pokes out from the middle, the sun shining beautifully over it. Zoro felt–
Zoro shakes his head at the thought.
Law follows Zoro's gaze, ending the call on his transponder snail when he sees who's in the water.
Law
Speak of the devil….
Zoro
OI!!!
The blonde turns to look at the source of sound.
Sanji
MELLORINE!!!
Sanji waves enthusiastically at the duo staring at him.
From afar, Zoro could tell that the man practically had heart eyes bulging out of his eye sockets.
Sanji takes a plunge into the water, swimming away from the murky area then reappears next to the wooden pier just under where Zoro was standing. His head pokes out gracefully, then gives the swordsman a warm smile.
Zoro takes a step back to distance himself, suddenly feeling like a girl whose skirt is being perverted on.
Zoro
Don’t give me that, idiot. Your outlash may have cost me some pull from the Marines.
Sanji
Oh? Has it occurred to you that that may have been my plan?
Zoro’s eye twitches, clearly infuriated at being toyed with. He pulls himself together internally and lets out a defeated sigh.
Zoro
Is this for not meeting up with you in person like I said I would? I got stuck with all the bureaucratic paper bullshit.
Sanji
I don’t know…
Sanji had a teasing tone behind his voice. He effortlessly pulls himself up to sit at the edge of the wooden planks, shakes his head and starts wringing his hair over his shoulder.
Sanji
Next time, don’t make promises you can’t keep.
Zoro lets out an offended huff.
Zoro
Next ti–? NO! There’s no next time! We're enemies. And what, is this your way of punishing me? To make me feel guilty? By murdering a bunch of Marines?
Sanji
Oh please, it was out of self-defense! They came onto me first….
Sanji calmly stands on his feet. Slowly, he begins to strip off his top, revealing his lean but muscular figure.
Zoro’s eye trails from Sanji’s scar across throat, down to the defined v-shape below his waistline. He recognises the cuts and burns from their battles, and some he guesses are from his own volition. When the blonde turns to fix his hair, Zoro eyes a small red tattoo, located below the nape of his neck. For some reason, he’s never noticed it on him before–a red circle with four triangles, arranged to look like the claws of a dragon. It has a cluster of messy scars over it, as if it'd been attempted to be removed by means of violent scratching. Like all else, he’s wondered what the story behind this is–
Zoro almost slaps himself to shake the thoughts out of his head. He makes an effort to look the blonde in the eye before he notices him staring.
Sanji gives Zoro a side glance before squeezing the damp clothing in his hands to dry it. He closes his eyes and his mouth curves into a cheeky smile. He gives his top one last flick before tossing it over his shoulder.
Sanji
I gave them a chance to apologise but some of them didn’t have any manners and charged in. Really, they were quite rude.
Zoro
You could have just knocked them out. Some of them were fresh blood. They’re probably just trying to prove they can do a good job to impress their seniors.
Sanji
By overdoing it. And now that fresh blood is all over my poor clothes. All because they tried to force me into those…heavy, rusty fuckin’ pieces of–
Law clears his throat.
Zoro and Sanji look at him, annoyed at the interruption.
Law
If you’re done bickering like an old married couple….
Zoro’s eye visibly twitches, his brows furrowing angrily at Law's poor choice of words.
Sanji practically swoons, his hands slap his own reddened cheeks while the rest of his body squirm comically.
Sanji
OH, YOU–stop that! We’re not married yet, you bastard!
Zoro
WE’RE NOT GETTING MARRIED. PERIOD!!!
Law could practically feel the veins in his forehead pop.
—
They start the trek back to the Marine base, purposely taking the longer way through the shoreline to avoid panicked citizens after Sanji’s onslaught.
Sanji
Marimo-kun~!
Zoro ignores the man, and concentrates on walking quietly. He attempts to put his mind in a meditative state.
Sanji
Ma–ri–mo-kun~?
The shade under Zoro’s brows darkens. He focuses on his breathing–he inhales, holds it, then exhales. He repeats it several times more.
Sanji crumples his heavy damp clothing into a ball then throws it at the back of Zoro’s head, causing the other man to stumble.
Sanji
I SAID “MARIMO”, YOU ASS!!!
Zoro grabs the wet top and throws it hard onto Sanji’s face square on, knocking the man down on his butt.
Sanji
THAT HURT!
Zoro
DON’T THROW GROSS THINGS AT ME! WHAT DO YOU WANT?!
With a blink of an eye, Sanji’s demeanour changes. He bites his lip and looks up to Zoro with a large puppy eye.
Sanji
Why is he here? Isn’t this a date?
Zoro
Fuck off. I never said it is. We’ll tell you when we get to the base.
Sanji
Hmm…no, then I’m not going.
Sanji crosses his arms stubbornly. His legs do the same, planting himself firmly on the ground.
Law
Zoro-ya, can’t you just tie him up and drag his ass along? I just want this over and done with.
Zoro
You’ve seen what happens if you force him into things, idiot.
Sanji
Yeah, idiot.
Zoro
I’m not talking to you.
Sanji
Then do, otherwise I’m not coming along. You're taking me into a Marine base after all. I'd be at a disadvantage as soon as I step inside. You have to give me a good reason to go with you.
Zoro
You said you'd help me.
Sanji
You? Sure. I was hoping to gain your personal favour. Him? Ehh…. He's not exactly my type.
Sanji looks at Law, slowly dragging his eyes down his frame.
Sanji
Hmm…I guess he could be if he's willing to play.
Law nervously takes a step back, feeling hot and bothered.
Zoro sighs. He considers for a moment, trying to come up with a way to make sure that Sanji cooperates with them peacefully for as long as possible without sacrificing anyone to indulge in whatever sexual fantasies are in his head. After a time, he speaks firmly.
Zoro
Tra-guy, tell him everything you told me.
Law
Here? We’re doing this right here, right now?
Sanji
I'm glad you understand, Marimo.
Law
I… I don’t know.
Sanji
I don’t need the whole sob story, Trafalgar D. Water Law.
Law blinks in surprise that Sanji knows his name. Sure he had a bounty but he didn’t think it was anything noteworthy. He certainly wasn’t aware that the Pirate King would care enough to know about it. He opens his mouth as if to say something but gets interrupted.
Sanji
I have eyes and ears everywhere, love. What I don’t know is why the Surgeon of Death is looking for Doffy.
Zoro
Doffy? The same guy who gave you your new weapon?
Sanji
Aww! You remembered?! …Are you jealous?
Sanji gives Zoro a suggestive wink, taking the swordsman aback.
Zoro
Don't be ridiculous.
Sanji
If you like, I can call off my affairs with him and just make it exclusive with you….
Law
As much as I want to kill that monster, I don’t think I can right now. Not at my current strength.
Sanji snaps his gaze to Law, giving him a dangerous look.
Sanji
You’re right. You can’t.
Law
I’m just looking for my friend. It’s…it’s his brother, Donquixote Rosinante.
Sanji raises a brow.
Sanji
Corazon has been dead for years.
Law
Then you better check your sources, Mr. Prince-ya. Because I have letters from him from the last several months.
Sanji stands on his feet and approaches Law slowly.
Sanji
Show me.
—
Back at the Marine base, Sanji and Law escalated into a heated argument in the interrogation room. Sanji insists that if they truly want his insight into Donquixote Rosinante, the doctor should show all the letters that he claims to have.
Naturally, Law refused to show the blonde, stating that it’s all too personal.
Zoro knows he shouldn’t, but for once, he feels relieved that someone else is dealing with the mad king’s temper. He hides a smirk behind a bottle of sake, taking a swill.
Sanji
Don’t be an idiot. I don’t give a flying fuck what’s in them!
Law
Then there’s no reason for you to see a single one.
Sanji clasps both of his hands together, and gently sets them down the wooden table in front of him. With a deep voice, he speaks.
Sanji
Enlighten me then, how do you truly know it is him?
Law
If you must know, all his letters have…details that only he and I know.
Sanji firmly presses his fingers down the table, then speaks slowly but clearly.
Sanji
All the more reason that you could be in bigger danger than you think, doctor.
Law frowns.
Sanji
You're far too enamoured to think straight. How do you know it’s not just someone else messing with you? Hmm? Someone like Doffy?
Law crosses his arms then leans back against his chair, listening intently.
Sanji
Think about this… very… carefully.
Sanji shuffles in his pockets and fishes out a pack of cigarettes. When he opens the box, his eyes furrow in disappointment, seeing that all of his smokes are heavily damaged from water and blood. He throws the pack over his shoulder then snatches Zoro’s bottle of sake as the swordsman was about to take a drink.
Zoro
Oi!
Sanji takes three big gulps before slamming the bottle down on the table.
Sanji
Given how touchy you are about the idea of me reading them, I’m guessing you’ve become quite emotionally attached to the letters, haven’t you? Just consider, whoever wrote them knows an awful lot of details about you. What’s more, they know where to find you, and how to find you.
Zoro raises a brow at that. He notices that the doctor is starting to lose his composure slightly as a tiny bead of sweat falls on the side of his face.
Law
You assume it’s being sent to me.
Sanji
A trail, then? He’s leaving you clues and you’re more than happy to follow it.
Law
That’s…
Sanji takes another big drink, then explains his point further, waving Zoro’s bottle in front of him as he makes hand gestures to emphasize his speech.
Sanji
What if it’s a trap? If someone, say…I don’t know–like Doffy–is pretending to be Corazon, then you’d have been sold out for a fool.
Law slams his hand aggressively on the table, cracking its surface where his fist landed.
Law
You’re wrong!
Sanji stares at him unimpressed but doesn’t say anything, as if allowing him the chance to explain himself. He leans back against his chair.
Law
Look, I just know, okay? It’s him. I’m sure of it.
Sanji
You just know…?
Law
Yes.
Sanji
Then you’re hopeless.
As Zoro attempts to steal his sake back, the blonde slaps his hands away and takes several more swills from the bottle, as if telling the swordsman that he’s not done with his turn yet. He wipes his mouth with the back of his hand then returns his focus back to Law.
Sanji
And how is it that you just know?
Zoro
Tra-guy, he’s not going to stop until you show him.
Law
You’re on his side, Zoro-ya?
Zoro
Look, you don’t have to show him everything, just show him one–like the bit where you’re stuck. It was enough to convince me.
Law pinches the gap between his brows.
Law
What you’re basically telling me…is that I should trust him with this information? That I should trust this mass murdering fucker with something extremely important to me?
Sanji
I told you, I don’t give a shit what’s in it–
Law
That’s what worries me! Because I care–a lot! I….
Law’s ears visibly reddens in embarrassment. He rubs the back of his neck awkwardly, averting his gaze.
Law
He was… is… very important to me. The letter is from him. I’m sure of it. And if you don’t care about it then I’m not letting you get your hands on it.
There was a moment of silence. Sanji watches Law in his vulnerable state. After a while, the blonde takes another drink from the bottle and sets it in front of Zoro.
Zoro grabs the bottle enthusiastically. He raises it above his mouth and nothing but a single drop falls onto his tongue. His smile vanishes, and his shoulders droop sadly until his arms and face melt onto the table. He sets the bottle down, pushing it away from him.
Sanji
I apologise, doctor.
Zoro and Law both look at Sanji in surprise.
Sanji offers a warm smile to Law.
Sanji
I’m afraid I’m not so good at these things. I’ll help you however I can.
Zoro stares at him in disbelief, cocking his head on the side against the table, processing the genuinity behind Sanji’s tone. He detects no ill will or malice behind it. He tells himself he’s just a bloody good liar.
Sanji
However, I still need to see a letter–just one will do, like the swordsman said–so I can study it. I promise I’ll take good care of it. If it resembles Doffy’s writing in any way, I will tell you. If it’s not, I’ll see what I can deduct from it, given that you’re apparently…”stuck”.
Law
I…thank you, Mr. Prince-ya.
Sanji slightly bows his head at him in acknowledgement.
Law
However, there is one thing that still bugs me….
Sanji
Oh?
Law
Why the interest in Corazon? You seem very keen to find out if he’s really dead or not.
Sanji
Corazon was–is…Doffy’s brother after all. His death shook a number of undercover Marine agents, enough to blow their covers.
Zoro
How would you know that?
Sanji
Because it all happened under wraps, which I make it my business to know. Your precious World Government made sure to cover it up nice and snug to keep up appearances.
Meanwhile, everyone else who actually did the work started pointing fingers, accusing each other of who ratted out your mate, afraid that they’re next. Ultimately, they hunted each other down. Now, while I don’t give two shits about the Marines, this whole ordeal should not be taken lightly.
Sanji leans forward on his seat.
Sanji
If he is alive, then Doffy has lied to me, which violates the rules of our country’s alliance. I’ll need to look into this matter personally to keep this quiet. If you let me help you, this will be beneficial for the both of us, I assure you.
Law takes a moment to process everything that Sanji had laid out for him. Reluctantly, he nods. Thinking it takes a criminal to know one. He reminds himself that he just needs advice and nothing more. He leans forward and shuffles in his pockets. He pulls out a folded piece of paper but before he could stretch his arm to offer it to Sanji, the blonde raises his hands in front of him.
Sanji
Let me just wash up. I still have Marine blood on me and I don’t want to get them all over your letters.
Sanji stands, then walks to the door.
Zoro’s eyes follow him. His expression softens at the blonde’s thoughtfulness and unexpected change in character. It must just be the single sip of the sake that clouds his own thoughts. He makes it clear to himself that it’s just acting–no doubt to get on Law’s good side then at the last second stab him in the back.
Sanji
Marimo-kun, the door, please?
Zoro
Ah. Right.
Zoro unlocks the door, then hollers for a couple of Marines to take the Pirate King to the washroom, instructing them specifically to “be nice” if they value their lives. Hesitantly, they do as he says, even with the odd request, too scared to do anything out of hand especially after learning what had happened to their colleagues in the townsquare.
Law kicks back on his seat, placing his hands behind his head.
Law
He’s not what I expected.
Zoor closes the door behind him, and turns to the doctor, glaring at him.
Zoro
That may be the last thing in your head if you let your guard down. Remember what I told you earlier.
Law
His mind is his real weapon, not his claws. I know. But he–
Zoro
As soon as he charms you, he’ll make you do things you’ll regret. Luffy would kill me if he gets to you.
Law
You sound like you talk from experience….
Zoro
Don’t even go there. Have you forgotten that he’s just murdered a bunch of Marines not far from here?
Law
I…you’re right.
Zoro approaches Law, jabbing a finger on his chest.
Zoro
Don’t forget what I said.
Moments later, Sanji returns to the interrogation room, escorted by a couple of trembling Marines behind him. They bring him inside, then rush out the door, locking it behind them in a panicked state. The blonde looks and smells a lot cleaner this time, and his hair is damp again–presumably after having borrowed the navy’s shower room. Zoro and Law also can’t help but notice that he’s completely changed out of his blood-stained clothes, and is now sporting a Marine officer uniform worn with the coat buttons undone and no shirt underneath, keeping his front exposed.
Sanji saunters, twirls gracefully, then strikes a pose to show off his new outfit proudly. Zoro can’t help but let out an unexpected hearty laugh.
Zoro
That looks awful on you! You didn’t just pry it from the dead, did you?
Sanji
Goodness, no. They had spares. I admit, it’s a little loose, but you don’t have to be so mean.
Sanji flicks his hair, keeping his other hand on his hip. The small spray of water from his hair strands makes it look like sparkles in the air with the way the room’s light shone on it. He looks down at the swordsman, making the other man stop in his fit of laughter.
Sanji
Besides, I feel fantastic in it.
Hey, tattoo guy, let���s do this.
Sanji is back on his seat. The look of confidence he usually wears on his face has dithered away. He looks dumbfoundedly at the piece of paper that Law had given him. He flips the paper to check its back, looks at the front again, then flips it once more.
Sanji
This is it?
Law nods. His face had gone red.
Sanji
It just says “I love you.”
Law pulls out a stack of the similarly sized papers of varying shades from his breast pocket and lays it down in the middle of the table.
Law
Now you’ve seen one, you’ve seen it all. But uh… you can’t touch these.
Sanji slaps his forehead with the palm of his hand.
Sanji
I don’t know what I expected. THEY’RE NOT EVEN SIGNED!
Law
It’s something he’d do, okay?! You wouldn’t understand.
Sanji
No, I don’t!!! This is ridiculous! Is this seriously it?!
Sanji stops abruptly. His eyes stare at the stack of papers, shifting left and right, as if suddenly deep in thought–and he’s thinking fast. He inspects the one closely in his hand, then holds it close to the stack on the table, comparing the two.
Sanji
These papers are all not from the same place.
Law
Why does the paper matter?
Sanji
Because, my dear, this means that you’re always in his thoughts–or whoever’s writing it anyway. They didn’t write this all in one go then went about scattering it. They took their time, and wrote down a new letter each time they thought of you with whatever they could get their hands on.
Law freezes. Whatever thoughts he has, he keeps it in his head but it’s noticeably making his hands and lips tremble. After a few quiet moments, Zoro breaks the silence to help him out.
Zoro
Tra-guy, show him the other thing.
Law
Right….
Law pulls out a long envelope the length of his arm. He carefully places it in front of Sanji
Law
This came with the letter that you’ve got in your hand.
Sanji tilts his head curiously. He carefully sets down the letter he’d been given earlier, then gestures towards the envelope.
Sanji
May I?
Law nods.
Sanji gently lifts the flap, then pulls out a delicate feather from the envelope.
Law
The letters always come with a clue where to go next. My crew and I have been travelling for several months now, mostly in the Grand Line. This is the latest, and the reason why we thought Doflamingo may know something, or has got Corazon locked up somewhere. But we haven’t been able to track him down for quite some time.
Sanji pinches the hollow shaft, spinning the feather to admire its features.
Sanji
Hmm…I don’t think it’s Doffy. Though this would make a nice feather for a hat.
Law
What makes you say that?
Sanji claps his hands excitedly.
Sanji
Ooh, I’m glad you asked! There’s this hat that Zoro’s dad wears everywhere. It’s got this gorgeous white feather that makes it stand out nicely with–
Zoro
Not about the hat, stupid! Why do you think it’s not Doflamingo?
Sanji
Rude. But that’s a simple question. Doffy’s coat is pink. This is more purple-pink. Hmm… I think this might be from a South Bird. They’ve got a big body and an even bigger personality. They’re native to Skypiea.
Zoro’s brows shoot up.
Law
Skypiea? The legendary island in the sky? Isn’t that just a tall tale?
Zoro
I remember those birds. I can see why there’d be some confusion now.
Sanji
Have you been there, Marimo-kun?
Zoro smiles softly at the feather, then reaches out for it. Sanji obliges, handing it to him by the hollow shaft gently, their fingers brushing each other. The swordsman runs his hands through its soft barbs.
Zoro
Sure have, while travelling with my old captain.
Sanji watches Zoro admire the feather, taking notice of his brightened expression and hazel eye. He wonders what sort of tales he has in store. He doesn’t speak much of his old captain to him. Then again, he doesn’t really share a lot of things with him because why would he?
Only now did Sanji realise that he hasn’t really taken his time to admire the swordsman’s features up close. He makes a mental note to plan a sneaky peek under a different light–maybe outside during dawn or dusk when the colours of the sky would bring out his eye colour more.
Law
How do you know for certain that it’s from a South Bird, Mr. Prince-ya? I don’t recall you being an aviary expert.
Sanji
Oh, I’m not claiming to be a scientist in any way. But I have this thing for feather coats since Doffy likes to use it for sex.
Zoro drops the feather from his hands.
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Here's a more polished art to make up for the longer chapter.
#pirate king of the north#villain sanji#villain au#one piece#vinsmoke sanji#fanfic#opfanart#roronoa zoro#one piece fanart#one piece fanfiction#sanji x zoro#zosan fanfic#one piece zoro#op zosan#one piece zosan#zosan#old zoro#warlord zoro
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Splatoon community is great, it's just looking at all these rail-thin, jutting-pelvis-edges J-pop idols and saying "ok but what if they had body fat/muscle aside from that strictly needed to function at a basic level."
And it makes sense too, because most of them are canonically athletes, and a few are canonically huge foodies. Like I get the beauty standards of being an idol and all that, but they should have at least some Mass. Something something repeating the mistakes and flaws of humanity alongside the beautiful and true things.
Anyway, I just love how the community has largely decided this game takes place in a wholly body-positive society. It makes sense, really, in a world with dozens to hundreds of intelligent species. When your neighbors are a 3 inch tall non-anthro shrimp, a 6-armed crab man the size, weight and strength of a Ford F150, and a 10 foot tall, borderline emaciated, neon orange man with rail spikes for hair who eats live basketball-sized snails, you're not going to stare at your own species's fat dudes.
Cross-dressing is seemingly wholly normalized in canon, there's at least basic Non-Standard Pronouns, and Pearlina is so razor-edgedly close to being canon, so interspecies gay celebrities are also all but canon. Why WOULDN'T this society be body positive? There are 5 femboys on every street and graffiti is seemingly legal. This should be a no-brainer. This society has a doctorate in acceptiveness, and we're out here having to add in comparatively high school level stuff.
Honestly, it's an interesting case of the society a piece of media was produced in "holding back" the fictional society within it. Nintendo designs these characters for mass appeal; fittingly, since they're idols. And in Japan, idols are skinny, end of story. But we, the queerest, most hot-chip-eating fandom currently alive, say nay. My version of this character is buff. This one is fat. This one has a cane. This one is visibly trans. If you won't do it, mainstream Japanese AAA studio, then we will do it in your stead. Gimme the reins, Nogami, and say goodbye to Kyoto. We're going to headcanonland.
(christ, this post went off the rails)
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Hi, I love the way you write and represent Sans with every detail, I was wondering if you could do a SFW AND NSFW headcanon of SansxReader. If you don't mind of course
Hi thanks so much for requesting, you asked and I shall deliver!! I'm just assuming they're general headcanons since it wasn't specific, I've been meaning to get around to some general headcanons because I feel they're a good way to work out some personality✨ I did masc and femme sans nsfw headcanons and left the reader ambiguous, As always hope you enjoy!!
Sfw:
•Expect alot of lazy cuddle times, they're his favorite he just loves being near you really, and his constant state is tired so being able to just take it easy with you is nice.
•On a completely opposite note you do motivate sans to do stuff he normally wouldn't. He'll get off the couch and out of bed to spend some time outside with you, his favorite date place is still grillbys but he'll try out new places with you sometimes.
•He sends you memes that make him think of you or he finds funny even if he's right next to you and can just show you. He'll send it and then watch you for your response, he'll make a joke about your phone going off if you don't check it immediately.
• The patrons at Grillbys get updated on you occasionally. Sans feels comfortable there and he knows most of the people so he lets his guard down and you're really special to him. So he ends up gushing about you and what you've done together ,nothing private of course, after a few drinks and his buddies are all really happy for him. They think you're good for him he seems a lot more stable since you came into his life.
•Sans will absolutely drag you out of bed to stargaze, he gets excited like a kid on Christmas his eyelights big and shining as he drags you outside with his telescope. He always plans little dates when there's going to be a space event like a super moon or meteor shower. He loves being able to indulge in his interest with you and hopes you have as great a time as he does.
•He loves making you actually laugh with his jokes and it makes him feel good and he loves hearing your laugh. It makes him feel proud of himself anytime he gets even a smile out of you.
•Sans just loves being close to you he'll follow you around the house, if you're doing dishes he has his arms wrapped around your waist and his head on your back. On the couch? His head is in your lap or he's just sprawled out over you. In the bathroom? If you're comfortable with it he's sitting in there with you on his phone looking at memes. Just enjoys being in your presence in general.
NSFW:
•One of Sans favorite things is giving oral, he gets to be between your thighs and can go at whatever pace he wants. He's an absolute tease and is definetly into edging while doing this as he wants to spend as much time in between your thighs as possible.
•Sans is a switch preference towards bottom. Not saying sub because he's still a teasing prick when he's underneath you but it's not hard to get him to sub. He looks pretty cute face flushed cornflower blue, moaning underneath you as you ride his cock/eat him out while his hands are tied to the bedsheet.
•Cockwarming is a big thing with him too, he likes to just lay there cuddled together while he's inside you watching a movie or on your phones. He likes to see how long you can last before you start moving as he's pretty patient. He might grind into your occasionally if he's in a teasing mood.
•On the opposite note if you want him to be on top he's more than happy to help. He enjoys snail position alot because he's close to your calves and can bite on them, or anything that really gets him close to your legs as he is a leg man.
•Feel like his ecto-cock is about 5.7 inches not the biggest but it's girthy and has some vein to it, his ectobody itself is chubby. In femme form he's got d cup tits and his chub is still there but he has more of a hourglass figure than before, and a cute blue innie pussy. (There's innies and outies y'all you're welcome for the info)
•His go to is the masc form but if you want femme he'll give you femme. Squeezing his plush thighs as you eat him out. A blush across his face as he watches you eyes lidded praising you for doing such a good job slipping a joke in there somewhere while he gently presses your face closer with a hand on the back of your head.
#undertale fandom#undertale fanfiction#sans x reader#sans undertale#sans x you#sans the skeleton#sans#sans headcanons#smut#undertale headcanons#my headcanons#headcanons#request#requests open#send asks#Pls
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hi!! how’re you??? can you write something about drunk Ellie?? in my head she’s a totally loser lol
plus: i love your account 😭 thank you for feeding my passion for Ellie 🥲🫶

hi sweetheart!! im alright, better than usually even.. and thank you ahh youre so nice anon🫣‼️ anyways, warnings: slightly suggestive, throwing up, obviously alcohol and.. i think thats all. also i imagine it more as college!ellie since i think older ellie would rarely drink + only drink to cover up her sorrows;(( i hope you guys get what i mean..

drunk!ellie who can't drink alone or she'd completely pass out. either you or dina have to tell her when to stop, though 'telling her' doesn't really work. the only option is to just take the alcohol out of her sight.
drunk!ellie who becomes a full-time shit talker. she'll be so mean, but right, you're scared what she might think of you. of course, no one really takes her too seriously, since every insult leaving her mouth is slurred and... immature. in moments like that, you always bring up people you hate and listen to her rambling about every little pathetic thing about them. she can go on like that for minutes, hours even, and it's like music to your ears.
drunk!ellie who wants to make out with you so so badly. she forgets you're 'just friends' and her big, huge crush on you starts showing as she gets all touchy with you. when you or anyone else calls her out, she of course refuses to admit it and insists that she isn't doing anything (her hand rubs your inner thigh, moving higher and higher each second).
drunk!ellie who blames everything on jesse or dina. someone threw up? dina, of course. someone drank your father's liqueur, which was supposed to stay untouched? she saw dina emptying the bottle and tempting jesse, as if they're adam and eve. someone broke a vase? she saw jesse accidentally pushing it with his elbow.
"but ellie, i saw you—"
"y—yeah! he pushed me and um— yeah. jesse... it's his fault, i s—swear." and it almost seems she believes her own lie, though it doesn't seem so convincing to the rest of you.
drunk!ellie who starts doing the most random things ever. board games, rubik's cubes (even though she never managed to solve it without watching a step by step tutorial), and don't even let me start on puzzles— if she finds a set, she'll have a goal for the rest of the night - completing them, even if they have thousands of pieces. the point is, she never succeeds. her vision is too dizzy and her head is spinning too much, she can't find two fitting pieces at all.
drunk!ellie who keeps telling everyone random funfacts or the most impossible to happen thoughts.
"did you guys know that snails can sleep for three years? man, lucky motherfuckers. i hope i'll be one in my next life."
you don't even start on how they're slow, how people stomp on them all the time or how their lives are simply boring. you know nothing will change her mind.
"hear me out... what if—" she's so invested she has to make a dramatic pause. "this room just exploded. like, right now."
drunk!ellie who falls asleep snuggled up with you, drooling on your chest and unintentionally moving her hand in a way that slides your shirt upwards, but you don't fix it and enjoy the view of your loser best friend being so adorable and quiet once in her life. jk shes always adorable
✧˖°
#reqs open#ellie williams#ellie williams x reader#ellie williams x y/n#ellie williams x you#ellie x reader#ellie x y/n#ellie tlou#ellie the last of us#drunk!ellie#drunk!ellie williams#drunk!ellie williams x reader#drunk!ellie x reader#loser!ellie williams x reader#loser!ellie x reader#loser!ellie williams#im actually so loser!ellie coded#loser!ellie#nerd!ellie#nerdy!ellie#college!au#college!ellie williams#college!ellie#college!ellie williams x reader#college!ellie x reader
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Yall ever think like, considering above and beyond, like its been years for them and they're so experienced.
the octo agents met them with all this cool tech and experience and protocol and ability
but like none of them know that barnacles kwazii and peso once wore a fake walrus costume in order to pretend to be a walrus
none of them know that dashi barnacles and kwazii tried to escape THE INSIDE OF A WHALES MOUTH by just :') RUNNING FULL SPEED AT THE BALEEN PLATES (weird whale teeth)
none of them know about the time professor inkling tentacle wrestled a giant squid TRYING TO FIGHT/EAT THE ENTIRE OCTOPOD?
none of them know about THE CONE SNAIL INCIDENT
LIKE??? couldu imagine being like an agent of what's essentially water based rescue NASA and then u find out the guy in charge absolutely tried to rescue his coworker by "waving through kwaziis spaghetti distraction" or whatever the fck (kawaii was going to "distract the whale by weaving around like a piece of spaghetti or something similar LMSO)
like I just haven't seen anyone talking to how they must look to outsiders
like. They eat kelp in EVERYTHING. and its not like they're just like all in a vegan world, paani canonically enjoys dried bugs. I'm sure there's some animals that are like, more irl animal behaviours or whatever lol
butseriously, kelp cakes, kelp biscuits, kelp marshmallows, kelp kebabs, kelp stew- Yeah these btches autistic-
but seriously imagine going to your friends house and their ENTIRE FAMILY just offers you "lentil cake!" or "lentil Mac and cheese!" or "lentil chicken nuggets!" wouldnt they look fcking crazy?
i just think its funny cuz like "oh yeah shout-out to the one time a bunch of sea creatures literally stole the octopod hahaha or lol, the time we flooded the ship so slippy the sea cucumber would be able to breathe under water haha, man we must have purposefully flooded the octopod what? three times at least? "
LIKE WHAT ARE THE UNDER SEA SHENANIGANS-
like I just want ONE octo-agent (and it cant be paani this guy would just be like "oh yeah makes sense :)" to look at them and go??? yo what the FCK? oh God... maybe the ocean pressure effected their brains?!"
LIKE-
like yeah they're all SO FCKING serious about ping pong too, and they all absolutely have the weirdest behaviours because these guys have spent literal years in the middle of the ocean with eachother 😭
i just love them so much-
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hi hi hi snail!!!!
i have a big question for you sorry if you've already answer it!!
how do you think, out of yandere man, who would infantilise the reader the most and in which ways?
idk i just had a really weird random thought that some of them could be really dramatic during your period, insisting that you need special care like massages/stretches and etc with which they will of course help cause they believe you are too silly to know such things and cant be trusted to do them properly on your own (we all know where it ends tbh...)
thank you in advance with each of your post i fall in love more and more with your blog (and platonically with you (with your consent))🌹
❄️
mwah mwah mwah
Love you ❄️ anon!!! Apologies if this is bad. 😔 im a bit blind right now but this invaded my thoughts more than I'd like to admit.
TW: Infantilization, slight smut, period care (in his way), Humiliation, Yandere behaviors.
This is so Nanami coded but!! He doesn’t infantilize you by calling you baby names or dressing you in frills (though he does sometimes pat your head a little too often, acting like you’re a particularly slow student who finally got the answer right). He does it by removing your choices (isnt that so sweet?), and making it feel like he’s doing you a favor.
It starts with your period, sure. You're tired. He gets it. So let him handle dinner tonight. Let him draw the bath, pick your clothes, rub the cramps out of your belly with slow, circular movements while chastising you about how you always try to push yourself too hard.
Nanami doesn’t trust really most menstrual products. He’s read too many clinical papers, knows exactly how common TSS is and how poorly most products are regulated. He doesn't like the idea of anything being inserted unless it's medically necessary, or unless he’s the one putting it there. (You always get so squeamish when he tries to put the tampons in)
Tampons? Too invasive for yourself to do and you won't let him do it. Claiming its gross. So what if he's licking his fingers afterwards. Its you. Menstrual cups? Never, too foreign. Pads? Uncomfortable, messy. Sometimes they're bleached. What if you get a UTI? No. It’s all too much risk.
So, he handles it.
He doesn’t forbid you from using them. Not exactly.
He just starts leaving alternatives on your side of the bed. Softer, organic pads folded neatly in a linen pouch. Washable, reusable, gentler for your skin. No dyes. No fragrances. “Better for your pH,” he murmurs softly. “Less risk.”
He always says it so calmly. So kindly. And it’s hard to argue when he’s already drawing your bath, one hand stirring the water to check the heat while the other rests briefly on your waist, keeping his silly girl beside him. You don’t even notice how often you stop making your own decisions.
He insists on helping with cleanup. Always has. Not in a humiliating way, at least not in his eyes. Gentle touches. No fanfare. Just his hands and his voice and the faint scent of sandalwood as he kneels between your legs, work sleeves rolled up.
“Looks like you bled yourself again,” he says softly, more observation than complaint. “No, baby, they don’t make heavier ones (they do). Just let me take care of you, okay?”
His breath brushes against your damp ruined panties, and your thighs tense without meaning to. You can almost see the need in his eyes at the bloody mess you made.
“Sit back,” he murmurs. “I’ve got it. You just look pretty for me.”
His thumbs hook the sides of your panties, sliding them down with ease, his fingers grazing your skin with just enough pressure to make your breath hitch. He steadies you with palms braced gently on your hips, firm enough to say stay still. His eyes flick up to your face, reading every microexpression as his hands return to the mess between your thighs.
But it’s never just that. You know that now.
Because the moment your breathing changes, the second your thighs twitch or your voice falters, he notices. Doesn’t stop.
“Sensitive today, aren’t we?” he hums, wiping you clean with slow, gentle movements. Not cruel. Not teasing. Just... aware. Like he’s logging each reaction, committing it to memory. His fingers linger, just slightly. Press a little firmer. Trace lower until you're bucking into his palm.
“You’d rush this,” he says gently, brushing along your skin with the cool damp towel. "It's why I need to take care of you"
He shifts to sit more comfortably, one hand stroking along your inner thigh while the other continues cleaning you, soft cloth passing over your folds, too tender to be neutral. Then he sets it aside.
“Are your cramps bad?” he asks, thumb beginning to draw slow, soothing circles over your clit. The tone is so sincere it makes your stomach twist. Like he really wants to know. Like he’s trying to ease them for you, and not get you wet.
But the pressure deepens. His thumb shifts lower, brushing against your slick entrance. His breathing stays calm, even as yours slips into something needy and short. When your hips buck, reflex, nothing more, he catches them with one large hand and holds you still.
“Oh?” he murmurs, low and thoughtful. “Is this helping... or am I making it worse?”
He doesn’t wait for an answer. He’s already kissing your belly, then your hipbone. His mouth brushes the plush curve of your inner thigh, reverent and hungry all at once. His other hand strokes your skin, thumb ghosting over the softest part of you like he’s trying to memorize the way it twitches.
“You’re not in the right state of mind to take care of this properly,” he says at last. And his voice is so calm, even now. Even with his face buried so close, his breath making you burn.
“Not when you’re like this,” he adds, lips brushing your skin.
Slow, precise strokes of his fingers dipping inside, testing what makes you gasp, what makes your walls flutter, how you pulse around nothing. He’ll edge you with just enough skill to make your belly tense up, to dull the pain into something soft, flushed, wet. Then he’ll ease off.
“This is what you need,” he says, curling his fingers inside you as you pant out needy whines, hips twitching. “Not pills. Not pads. Not anything foreign inside you.”
And then he pushes in deeper. One finger. Two fingers. Three if he feels like you're ready.
Slow, deep. Curling gently inside. Then maybe more. His mouth. His cock. Something thicker. He’s already cleaned you. You’re already in his care. What difference does it make now?
“You poor thing,” he whispers. “You never know what’s good for you until I show you, do you?”
But then it never stops there.
He orders your groceries. He tracks your supplements. He installs a cycle app on your phone but shares it to his own device too.
And if you argue?
Nanami never raises his voice. He doesn’t fight. He just tilts his head and asks, “Why would you want to take unnecessary risks?” Or worse, he’ll go quiet, disappointed. A quiet so heavy it makes your chest ache. Makes you feel guilty. So how could you not give in?
Because you know he’s not doing this to be cruel. You know he’s doing this because he loves you. Because he doesn’t trust you to care for yourself, not because you’re weak, but because you don’t value yourself as much as he does.
He’ll pick you up early from work without warning. You say, “You didn’t have to,” and he kisses your cheek and answers, “But I did.”
He’ll reorganize your closet to make sure only comfortable things remain. “You looked so uncomfortable in that skirt. I got rid of it.”
He going to control your world without ever admitting it’s control. It’s just what you need right now. Just until you’re better. Just until you can be trusted not to neglect your own well-being. At least thats what he keeps telling you.
#Nanami has a thing for periods I fear#As much as his silly little needy for babies#Yandere jjk#yandere jujutsu kaisen#Yandere nanami kento#Yandere nanami x reader#Yandere kento x reader#Yandere nanami kento x reader#Yandere jjk x reader#Yandere x reader
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Imagine Showing Izou Your Appreciation (Izou x Reader, fluff and smut)
I originally wrote this just for a silly but I really liked how it turned out.
Imagine you want to show your appreciation for Izou. Just as he wants to spend solo time together, so you do. You see all he does for everyone, how high the standards are he holds for himself and others, how hard he works….show your man some love! Does devolve into smut....
WC: ~1.2k
You invite Izou to join you in a private room you've prepared in the infirmary. Normally they're well, clinical. Cold. Sterile. But you've put the massage table in the room, covered it in a clean sheet, moved things around, set up candles and an ambient noise snail to give off soft sounds. You've spiced the room with lavender incense. Not too much, just enough to give a subtle scent, just the way your lover likes it. Izou knocks and enters and you can tell he's a touch surprised. He doesn't show it in his eyes or his expression but the abrupt turn of his head is a small sign. You're wearing a loose fitting garment and give him a kiss when he enters the room, putting your arms around his neck.
"What have you been scheming, my little Blossom?" he asks, looking you in the eyes.
"No schemes this time. I simply want to show you my affection. Let me massage you," you say simply, already rubbing the back of his neck with your strong fingers. Working on a ship had its benefits, namely your fingers of steel. Izou gives no resistance as you guide him to the prepared massage bed, taking off his kimono and folding it up the way he prefers. He allows you to undress him slowly, your touch lingering but still with purpose. Once he's down to his fundoshi, you lay him on the massage bed.
"I must say, this is quite a pleasant surprise," he murmurs, laying his chin on his crossed arms. You kiss the middle of his back and sweep his long, silken hair off to the side, revealing his impressively carved back. "You deserve it. Just relax," you reply, rubbing massage oil into your hands and starting to work on his scarred form. Izou is a man who generally keeps his feelings to himself but as you work into his tight back, shoulders, and neck and feel him loosen, he lets out a small moan. You don't say anything about it and the sound doesn't repeat but you know you've got him in the palm of your hand. You take your time, enjoying the glide of his skin under yours, the feeling of someone so strong and powerful submitting themselves to you, even if just for a moment in time.
"All done on the back," you say, running just a fingertip down his spine.
"Flip over," you purr, putting more massage oil on your palms. You're naked underneath your garment and already oiled yourself up before he entered the room. The wetness between your legs is just adding to the slickness of your skin. He grumbles a little, having been so relaxed under your touch. But needless to say, he adjusts and turns so he can see you getting on the table, throwing one leg over him.
"Mmm. Full service massage?" Izou asks, not even bothering to arch an eyebrow at you. He doesn't seem surprised you're naked underneath, but then again, he does know you well, you've been together for some time.
"Only for you," you say, rubbing massage oil down his front. You do spend some time rubbing his tired shoulders, arms and pecs but you also adjust so your slick folds are rubbing over his hard cock . Leaning over to knead his sore muscles automatically has you sliding over his twitching cock and you do everything in your power to accentuate the action. Normally Izou does not tolerate being teased for longer than a moment but right now he's allowing you to rub back and forth on him, never allowing penetration just stimulation for the both of you. It's like a jaguar allowing you the pleasure of petting its dense fur. He groans a few times as you lean over to massage his scalp, his tip nearly entering your sopping hole when you lean back. You're massaging his trapizeus muscles when he finally snaps and holds you by your hips.
"Sit down," he orders softly, pushing himself into you. You moan as he begins stretching you, the slickness of both your bodies allowing for faster movement. You put your hands on his pecs to start to slide down his cock before Izou clucks his tongue at you.
"I didn't say to stop massaging. You do you work and I'll do mine," he offers, rolling his hips.
You should have known it would end like this, you thought as you tried to continue massaging his muscles. Even seemingly docile under you, Izou is always in control. He rocks his hips into you in such a way that you're not too jostled as you continue to massage with shaking fingers.
"Come now little Blossom, let's see who finishes first, hm?" he says languidly, his supple body now at ease. You nod but in your mind you're not sure you're in control anymore. Maybe you never were, you think as Izou fucks up into you. One of his hands moves to rub at your clit, making your legs twitch.
"Can I r-ride?" you ask, tossing your head back. You really want to but Izou saves it for special occasions, like when you're not being bratty. So basically never. "Hmm. You've been quite selfless, giving me such a treat. I don't see why not," he muses, still rubbing your clit.
"Th-thank you Izou," you say, leaning down to give him a kiss. Izou allows you to bounce yourself on his cock, your squelching filling the small room over the sound of the ambient sound snail. His cock fills you to the brim as it hits you in all the right places. You switch from bouncing to grinding as he continues to gently rub your clit. Now you're the one moaning as he looks up at you with half lidded eyes. You love being on top of Izou, the view of his hair spread in front of you never failing to make you thank the stars you were blessed to be with this beautiful man.
"Izou, p-please? Can I come?" you whine, hoping he allows you. "Hmm," he says, drawing out the time before he answers.
"I h-have hot stones I prepared for you -" you grit out, willing the orgasm to halt until you get permission. You wager that Izou might be more inclined to let you if there's an additional surprise for him. Massages, hot stones, nothing will save you if you break his rules.
"What a thoughtful little Blossom. Go on then, seek your pleasure," he says benevolently, stroking your ass cheek with his hand. You rock yourself on Izou's cock rapidly, your high fast approaching. Between running your hands all over his muscled body, feeling him relaxing under your touch, knowing that you're providing him something he needs, it doesn't take much for you to get close to orgasm.
Just as you're about to come, Izou reaches down and opens the bucket of hot rocks on the floor and grabs two. He pushes them into the small of your back, making you arch even further and the coil in you finally snaps. You wail your pleasure, the heat from the stones nearly too much. But they rapidly cool off as you come down off your high, leaving you a slick, oily, sweaty mess. Izou kisses your forehead as you lay down on his chest, his softening cock still inside you. "Thank you for the surprise, Blossom. I could not ask for a better or more attentive partner. Seems we've found another use for your rocks, hm?"
Ace, elsewhere: tilts his head and frowns Thatch: what's up, buddy? you alright? Ace: it's….I just had a feeling that someone was doing……it's probably nothing.
#Izou x reader#x reader#op x y/n#Just a little fun time#Pamper! Izou! All! The! Time!#HE DESERVES IT#look at him#i love him so much#izo x reader#izo one piece#izou one piece
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