#they’re so interesting and fun honestly

[maxdibert]

Yah so how the fuck did Remus manage to "forgive" Sirius? And why does everyone in the fandom always take The Prank as an opportunity to make Wolfstar angst... Like...no?

I'm sick of seeing posts that are like "Sirius going back to his house and having a breakdown" "Remus not talking to Sirius to Sirius sends him a letter about how sad and depressed he is because none of their friends are talking to him". Oh my gosh. ENOUGH OF THAT 😮‍💨

Oh no, the consequences to my own fucking actions--- No SHIT, Remus doesn't want to speak with you. WHY WOULD HE??? And people just completely shove Severus into the corner as if he wasn't also going through something. This fandom man...

Honestly, I’ve never been interested in Wolfstar, and not because I dislike the characters but because it doesn’t make sense to me. I mean, if I had to choose a pairing for Sirius among his friends, for me, it would clearly be James, because Sirius was literally obsessed with him. He wasn’t just his best friend; Sirius’ entire life revolved around James, and even 12 years after his death, he couldn’t move on, to the point of projecting James onto Harry and getting upset when he realized they were two different people. Look, Molly Weasley gives me the creeps, but she was absolutely right when she called him out, saying that sometimes it seemed like he wasn’t seeing Harry but James—because that’s exactly what was happening.

But beyond that, Sirius shows absolutely zero interest in Remus or at least zero empathy. It’s clear that if there was any glue holding the group together, it was James. James had more sense than the two ringleaders combined, or at least more common sense to know where the limits were. He was also the one who took care of Remus when he had nowhere to go after finishing school. My theory is basically that Sirius hung out with Remus and Peter because James tolerated them, and because having a werewolf friend gave him an excuse to act recklessly. If we look at SWM, Sirius remarks that he wishes it were a full moon because he’s bored. He couldn’t care less that for Remus it’s a traumatic moment each month, because for Sirius, it means going out, living dangerously, and messing around with his friends. What’s a trauma for Remus is an opportunity for fun for Sirius. He doesn’t consider what it represents for his friend; he doesn’t show that his reason for becoming an animagus is to provide moral support. Instead, he’s WISHING for the moment his supposed friend dreads most because, for him, it’s an exciting event. That’s not appreciating someone—it’s seeing them as a means to an end, a tool. That’s pure utilitarianism, not friendship.

Now, let’s move on to the facts. In “The Prank,” Sirius doesn’t care about the consequences. He thinks it’s funny and is totally thoughtless because that’s just who he is—someone who was never taught about morals or ethics and who basically chose a different “side” than his family’s just to spite them. He’s a rebellious and chaotic spirit who despises snobbery, and that’s about it. There’s no deeper philosophy, no deconstruction. Deep down, he behaves like any other Black, believing he has the right to control others—whether it’s ending someone’s life if they’re “stupid enough to fall for the trap” (Severus, in this case), which he justifies by saying they deserved it, or using others for his malicious ends (Remus). It’s James who has a modicum of conscience and who thinks about the consequences, stopping Severus because James was taught values and understands that certain lines shouldn’t be crossed. But also, I think James genuinely cared about Remus and probably understood what it might mean for him to end someone’s life.

Then there’s the post-Hogwarts relationship. Remus is always portrayed as being very close to the group when canonically, Peter was the one who was always trailing James and Sirius like a cheerleader. Ultimately, they chose Peter over Remus to be the Secret Keeper. This happened because CANONICALLY, Remus had distanced himself from the group, and CANONICALLY, it was Sirius who suggested Peter because he didn’t trust Remus—thinking he might have joined the dark side. This wasn’t something that came from Lily or James; it came from Sirius. Sirius was the one who considered that Remus might have betrayed them. Is that really what a true friend would think? How can people even consider there’s chemistry or a sexual subtext between them when canonically, Sirius repeatedly demonstrates that he doesn’t care about Remus at all? He only starts paying attention to him years later, after escaping Azkaban and realizing his best friend is dead, and his personal cheerleader turned out to be a traitor who ruined his life. Then, when only the two of them are left standing, Sirius starts giving him attention—but only because he’s the last one left. That’s it. Even Rowling herself described Remus ages ago as “the third wheel in a two-person relationship,” referring to Sirius and James. Seriously.

And let’s not forget that Remus never doubted that Sirius could be a traitor either—he always believed him guilty. It’s funny when they’re portrayed as missing each other, but missing each other from what? Remus thought Sirius was scum the whole time! And how could he not? He’d seen Sirius be cruel, even sadistic, and show zero remorse. It’s no wonder it fit for him to think Sirius had lost his mind.

As for how Remus handled all this, it’s no mystery: Remus is very similar to Severus in terms of his position. He was a vulnerable kid clinging to any lifeline to keep a low profile and feel safe. Sirius and James provided that safety—they made him feel protected and accepted. He never raised his voice or questioned their decisions because the mere thought of being rejected terrified him. Even as an adult, he keeps justifying their crap because he’s clearly incapable of going against those who gave him a place when he needed it. Remus is also a terribly cowardly man—he doesn’t have the guts to confront things. He has a super avoidant personality, which is crystal clear when he leaves a 13-years-younger pregnant woman because he can’t handle the pressure. A 17-year-old kid has to make him come back—is there anything more pathetic than that? At 38? Sirius clearly hurt him, but Remus knew that confronting Sirius meant confronting James, and if James had to choose between the two, he would always choose Sirius. So it wasn’t in Remus’ interest to speak up or express how he really felt because the idea of losing the protection that came with being their friend was far worse than feeling like crap over what Sirius did. That’s it, plain and simple.

Honestly, it’s such a shame and a total waste that everything gets reduced to couples and absurd adolescent dramas when the dynamics among those four “friends” are fascinating because they’re built on pure power relations and are deeply dysfunctional. But instead of exploring that, which I find genuinely interesting, it all gets thrown away, their personalities are rewritten, and it’s all turned into cheap teen soap operas. But whatever.

[lunarrolls]

i’m gonna be a little incoherent here but i just wanna say. i’m actually really really proud of fcg for standing up for himself in this last episode. he is the sole truly godly faithful character among the hells and it was so exhilarating to see him actually stand his ground on his faith. i may not fully agree with him at all but i’m like YES. YOU GO YOU LITTLE ROBIT. YOU’RE BELIEVING IN SOMETHING!! it was honestly a wonderful little parallel to ashton’s development, and might have even been sparked by seeing that change—they were assured by ashton that even though the hells might argue or disagree, they’re always going to be family, and then later, fcg remembers that and disagrees with them rather than simply bottling their opinion and passive-aggressively bringing it up every now and then. it made me really happy. slowly, they’re getting better at this, and i’m so proud <3

[thatstoomanysausages]

There are people that have said that the crazy themes of the wild cards are preventing progress and lore storytelling, and I get you, but consider: whimsy and fun✨

Like yes, there’s less flow and progress cause they’re all exploring and trying not to die from crazy mods. However, creative freedom like this can make for some intense lore deaths that can be overanalysed and interpreted. Fuck your angsty narrative, these fuckers are high on acid 24/7 and they’re enjoying it after 5 1/2 seasons of stress and edgy lore.

I honestly do see the point, and the people who are politely saying it are valid, but this feels a little like the lucky block videos you’d see on Stampy, DanTDM, and PopularMMOs’ channels back in the day. I’m just enjoying the chaos and perhaps with less of a storyline, certain people will feel less inclined to convert to the bitter wants for certain duos to not team ‘as often’.👀👀

2am thoughts are hitting rn, thanks for the Halloween boops everyone❤️

[synthwayve]

Thinks about Micolash and Laurence’s rivalry that never strays from the confines of academic snark or the occasional jab despite their shared ambition(and possibly also just accompanying a general friendship they could have had since they worked together at some point. Idk I’m a softie. Sue me.) eventually involving into a full on intellectual divorce. Cries. Explodes. 72 casualties.

[insomniac-dormouse]

FUCK MAN THE ONE PIECE LIVE ACTION IS SO GOOD WTF

I NEVER THOUGHT I’D SAY THAT SHIT ABOUT A LIVE ACTION BUT HOLY SHIT

I LOVE THIS VERSION

ITS SO GOOD

[teamfortresstwo]

tbh I think Minthe and Hades was the most interesting dynamic in LO

[starbuck]

look, i know that i AM earning a real degree here and everything, but also the amount of discussion posts i do whose prompts are just “go to this website to learn a fact. restate the fact you learned. does that SURPRISE you????”

[toastedsmoreo]

not to be negative on main but jjk is pissing me off, man

[sunnibits]

*insert that one office meme* making ocs is so cool, I’d love to know literally anything about them some day :)

[hannahhasafact]

Getting another wave of “maybe having a mcmenamins passport could be fun…” but then remembering that I would have to eat a lot of mcmenamins food and like… eh

[digitaldiseas3]

i borderline hate redbull tbh that’s my unpopular energy drink opinion

[kavehayati]

Raisa telling me I’ll find “my one” but she forgets I already found him 😔

[imperpetuallylost]

i’m so in denial about needing to finish several of my college apps in a month i’ve been putting that shit off because it’s terrifying like what if i don’t get in where i want to what if i get in to my dream school and i know it costs 80k/yr and we won’t get much financial aid and they don’t do merit aid and then i have to decide not to go to the school i’d love to and make the decision to settle for somewhere else even tho my brother picked the expensive school but i don’t think i want that much debt and he did get some merit aid so it was probably cheaper and now he’s under a pressure to graduate in as few semesters as possible and use all his ap credit and i don’t want to have to deal with that but i also want to go to a competitive school even tho it’s stupid and doesn’t matter and half the reason i want to is because it’s my name that comes up when people are like who from our grade would be most likely to get into harvard which shouldn’t matter to me but that kind of thing just messes with you like how am i supposed to hear that people have such high expectations for me and think i could do some much and then turn around and not make that choice even if its what makes the most sense for me

so basically yeah it’s just really miserable i’m having mental breakdowns about this constantly i wrote my common app essay about a flaw of mine because somehow that’s what made sense to me and my mom wants me to put a more positive spin on it but i don’t know how to write nice things about myself it’s about perfectionism but the story doesn’t show that i’ve overcome it because i haven’t i’m a mess it was easier to write about that because we were repeatedly told it should be a story that helps them get to know you and your personality and who you are and not just you trying to brag and i might’ve taken a step too far but i don’t know how to balance that honesty and admission of a flaw with telling them i’m great and that they should accept me to their university because i’m like totally the best student and person ever

[sweet-as-kiwis]

6ft tall otter. Remember.

Remember……

[peak-dumbass]

tumblr isn’t letting me edit my tags unless I add text sorry OP

I will never full-on slander Earthspark.

Yes, I know S2 and "S3" writers are different (I'm always for Marty Isenberg though that was a neat surprise) AND the animation went downhill with a new studio (no hate to any workers) but it is not the worst show like I've seen people say it is ever since S1 finished. It's not "ruined", maybe lost potential but not flat out "RUINED FOREVER".

A few episodes in these last two batches were kinda "huh" BUT, I personally really enjoyed them, ESPECIALLY this last batch. Good amount of action, comedy and character interactions.

Imo, Earthspark doesn't SUCK. It is not "ruined". Circumstances may have affected the production quality, but I don't think it needs "saving" the way people think.

I do criticise the "batches" format and I will always criticise Paramount's shit advertising and Hasbro's lack of care and toy distribution. Hasbro hates money after all.

And I'm saying this as a Starscream fan? I bloody love Earthspark and the plot S2+S3 gave us.

(Even if he is a total bitch ala Starscream, I am a little concerned for him. But this is not the Starscream show, it's the Malto show!!)

[gloomwitchwrites]

I absolutely love your stories they’re so amazing! Can I please request the task force and pranking them by telling them a guy did your Brazilian wax

Thank you! I can't take all the credit. I might be the writer, but the Imagines Series couldn't be what it is without all the amazing ideas people have submitted. I'm honestly blown away by the amount of creativity and ideas sent my way. My inbox is full of wonderful requests, and while it's going to take me a bit to get to them all, I'm eager to complete them!

The amount of prank requests I've been getting has been so fun. Not just this one, but telling mom to shut up, and the premium air prank, etc. All of these make me giggle and have been a blast to work on. Thank you so much for sending this in!

Presented in four double drabbles.

For the masterlist and how to submit your own request, click HERE

Task Force 141 x Female Reader

Content & Warnings (per the warnings MDNI): swearing, suggestive themes, established relationship, pranks, non-descriptive nudity

Word Count: 800

ao3 // main masterlist // imagines & what if masterlist

John Price

John briefly licks the pad of his thumb before counting out the appropriate amount of pound notes.

“This enough?” he asks, presenting it to you.

It’s more than enough. “Plenty. Thank you, John.”

He leans forward a bit, and you eagerly greet him, pressing a quick kiss to his cheek. Drawing back, you give him your best smile. But beneath the grin is a trick.

You want to mess with him a bit.

“I have a new waxer,” you shrug, adding the cash to your wallet. “Cheryl put in her notice.”

Cheryl did not put in her notice. That woman probably won’t retire until she dies.

John inclines his head, already turning away. “That’s too bad. You liked her.”

“Yeah,” you sigh, grabbing your purse. “They’ve put me with someone new. A Mark? Mike? No—Marcus? I think.”

John freezes. He slowly turns back, cheeks bright red. “What?”

“It starts with an ‘m’,” you muse.

“Your new waxer is a man?”

“Yes,” you shrug. “And?” John’s face resembles a beet. “Everything good?”

“Where does Cherly work now?”

“John—”

He grabs his phone from his pocket and starts tapping away at it. "I want to know if she accepts walk-ins."

Kyle "Gaz" Garrick

Kyle's hand slowly runs over your newly waxed skin. "Look at you. So soft and smooth." His touch makes you shiver.

"You paid for it," you murmur.

"I did," smiles Kyle, head dipping.

His tongue makes contact, and you release a moan. It’s slightly distracting, but not enough to detract from you poking at him.

“Had a new waxer,” you sigh as Kyle goes in for another taste.

“Did you?” he asks absently, more interested in your new smoothness.

“A man, actually. Undergoing training. There were two of them in the room.”

Kyle's head snaps up. "What?"

"Why'd you stop?" you whimper.

"There were two men that waxed you?"

“No, Kyle. Just one.”

A series of emotions pass over Kyle's face. His mouth opens. Closes. And then his hand forms a fist, fingers flexing and relaxing as he mulls over something.

"Everything okay?" you ask, suddenly worried.

“Can’t be that hard.” Kyle pushes away from the couch and reaches for his phone. “Or expensive.”

“What can’t? Kyle. What are you talking about?”

You lean forward and see him adding a waxing kit to his online shopping cart.

“No,” you say firmly. “You’re not putting hot wax anywhere near my vagina.”

John "Soap" MacTavish

"Oh, what's this?"

Johnny's hands are on your thighs and then beneath your skirt in a moment.

"Johnny!"

"Is this for me? You don't have to. You know I like a good adventure through the woods."

"Johnny!" you say again, slapping his arm playfully as his fingers lightly squeeze, making your squirm in his grasp.

"Was this on my dime?" he asks.

"Maybe."

"Oh, aye. Am I gonna find an unknown charge?"

"With a tip. A large tip. My waxer deserved it. He did a good job."

"Oh, they—he?"

"Yes. That a problem?"

Johnny's hands don't retreat but he's staring at you—hard. You arch an eyebrow and he finally speaks. "Your waxer is a man?"

No.

"Yes."

Johnny nods and then he leans in, lowering his voice. “You’re taking the piss.”

“I’m—”

“I saw your location. I checked it out. They don’t have a single male employee in that place.”

Your face grows hot.

Johnny’s hands squeeze a bit harder, and then he lands a brief smack against the curve of your ass. “Lying to me, love?” Johnny tsks. He palms the curve of your ass where it stings. “Suppose I should punish you.”

“Maybe you should.”

Simon "Ghost" Riley

You reject the call and clutch your phone to your chest. You've messed up. Royally. Pranking Simon is always a terrible idea.

The texts were just a tease. Just a way to push Simon’s buttons.

I have a new waxer.

I thought it would be one of the other ladies.

But no!

It was a guy!

Your phone buzzes again and you nearly throw it across the room. It’s Simon. You decline the call. Everything is quiet for a few brief seconds before a text message from him comes through.

Answer your phone.

You click out a reply.

I'm in the car!

His reply comes instantly.

You're at home. I know your location.

Another incoming call. This one you answer.

"Simon,” you say flatly.

"What location did you go to?" he asks, voice rough with tension.

"Why?" you counter.

"What's his name?" he snaps.

"I know what you're doing, Simon.”

You always forget just how deep his possessive streak goes.

Silence. Then, "I just want to talk."

"Simon.”

He growls your name in warning.

"You don't need to go there. Just...come home. You can see the results for yourself."

He sighs. "I'll be there in ten. Be ready for me."

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