#they’re dead THEYRE ALL DEAD
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When somebody asks me about my favorite fictional character(s):
#they’re dead THEYRE ALL DEAD#fictional characters#fanfic#dead gay wizards#harry potter#fiction#media#ao3#meme#hp#stranger things#hannibal#teen wolf#daddiesdrarry on instagram#marvel#house md
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one of my favorite things about dps is the completely irrelevant background conversations/comments you’re probably not meant to hear but are still just barely audible? like the two guys in the study room arguing over their turns on the dart board, or the guys laughing under their breath and making ridiculing remarks when knox reads out his poem for chris, or the people in the opening scenes you can hear finding their friends and saying hi. it literally doesn’t matter at all, but it makes it feel so much realer and like you’ve really just been dropped into the setting with todd on the first day.
#tbh a lot of the welton extras are so fun to watch in certain scenes#the guy eating in class (who my friend nik and i dubbed Johnathan ‘Johnny’ Mark Roberts who is tumultuous besties with Stick)#the kid by the door who looks awkward as fuck when mcallister bursts in while they’re tearing out the intros to their books#the kid behinds hopkins that gives him a thumbsuo after his the cat/sat on/the mat poem#spaz and everything He gets up to (the fact that both knox and charlie throws shit at him 😭😭😭???? like LMFAOOO???????)#and ofc everyones favorite with zero dialogue stick#love them so bad i hope theyre all doing alright#dps#dead poets society
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wolfstar my loves 🫡🫡
sir yes sir
#simp sirius black#they’re soooooo#theyre gay your honor#wolfstar brainrot#he’s just so pretty#anyways#sirius wearing makeup#bc he so would#and bc i love drawing it#all the piercings in the world#alright i’m done#sirius black#remus lupin#wolfstar#padfoot x moony#padfoot#moony#dead gay wizards#marauders#fanart#digital art
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oh pallas and agnes power dynamic you really are SO unbelievably fucked,,,,,
#haven’t been able to write in days so i am posting instead. forgive me.#it’s just so. like. okay pallas has all of the material power here that’s not a question they’ve got much stronger magic they#know how the library works they’re directly placed in a mentorship role at the beginning re agnes she depends on them#for everything.#but also#pallas is very much Not Doing Well mentally (<- understatement of the century) and is pathologically incapable of processing their own#emotions related to this AT ALL. and in the process of trying very very hard to get to Know pallas (so pallas will Like her so pallas will#want to keep her alive) agnes kind of comes to understand a lot of pallas’s issues even better than pallas does and pallas starts to depend#on her for emotional support in a way they NEVER have with anyone else.#and pallas’s ability to show vulnerability has been soooo wrecked beyond belief that to them doing things like sharing part#of their backstory and being visibily hurt around someone is tantamount to placing a knife in someone’s hand and#then circling all of their weak points with a giant red marker while going ‘HEY STAB HERE’#so in their mind by doing this they’re giving agnes an IMMENSE amount of power over them like enough to kill them dead even though very#little else has changed about their dynamic. so pallas believes that they’re standing on much more equal ground then they really are#and agnes partly believes it too she thinks that by seeing this much of how broken down pallas is she’s finally found the balance in their#relationship she’s finally found a way to make it stable. and yeah. to some extent this is true!#pallas DOES listen to agnes more than any other person agnes IS the first person in years to understand them this much pallas’s dependence#on her for their mental wellbeing DOES give her some measure of power over them. but that power is given out on pallas’s terms is the thing#whether they’re aware of that or not. agnes wouldn’t have anything if pallas didn’t actively choose to be vulnerable with her there’d be#no way she’d learn about anything no way she’d get to play this role in their life#they believe that this thing is much more equal much more sustainable than it really is (pallas especially) and they’re#literally all each other have#grabs your face are you listening THEYRE ALL EACH OTHER HAVE IN THIS PLACE THEYRE BOTH IN SUCH HORRIFIC SITUATIONS AND THEY R EATING#EACHOTGER TO SURVIVE!!!!#head in fucking hands#wip: ghost story#pallas and agnes
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Dungeon meshi but instead of the Toudens it’s the Moreaus and all this time Elodie was away at a magic academy
I LOVE THIS SO MUCH you have activated my trap card…… honestly it would be quite cute though if jean was falin and elodie was laios……. doesn’t really work timeline-wise but with kevin Obviously being marcille it could be cute…………. maybe andrew is chilchuck and neil is izutsumi……… yes…. Yes….. theyre going to eat so many monsters and kevin is going to hate it all
also i just. sorry a tangent. but i love a) to think about jean and elodie in a happier light i think we should be working overtime to make aus where they get to be normal siblings and b) i love elf kevin so bad on account of my several perversions and issues. i want to flick his ear then hear it go boioioioing
#asks#kevin#jean#elodie#moreau family#THEYRE CUTE….#anna luvbug and i have created in our mind palaces a beautiful au where jean is a linecook and raises elodie……. and they’re all happy#elodie i will make a real person out of you yet. you and your dead victorian child charisma
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I fucking hate miya I fucking hate miya I fucking hate miya I FUCKING HATE HER SO MUCH I HATE HER SO FUCKINH MUCH someone is gonna have to sedate me before I EXPLODE
#hey look it’s one of those rare times I post about roots and not PDBC#I fucking hate miya have I mentioned that already#she makes me SO MAD so FUCKING MAD she’s the worst character#finally caved in and read the previously-lost-media-pages that explain what her deal is due to my brother’s constant begging for me to do so#(I was going to do it on my Own time but I’m sick of being pestered about it)#and I hate her even MORE holy shit#genuinely trying to tone down my language so this post doesn’t get marked as mature or something#she is SUCH A BITCH SHE I CANT STAND HERUHLSIHIUSNUSLINSUILUNLSNDLUNDNUIDL#don’t go read roots to see why I hate her. don’t do it genuinely don’t do it you’ll get pissed off#MIYAAAAAA 🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕AAUUGHHHHH#I know this post won’t make sense to anyone I just need to get it all out because screaming makes my throat hurt#and full disclosure I Did scream about it. I got very heated over it (this is normal behavior) (no it’s not’#my brother has the NERVE to say she’s like leif. they are nothing LIKE each other#miya will be the end of me I hate her So Much#have I mentioned that she was needlessly rude to Kurt like wha the fuck#Kurt did nothing wrong and she just was so mean to him for no reason. appalling behavior#this bitch miya has the nerve to act all morally superior to everyone else when she’s just as bad#something something glass houses something something the entire conflict is Miya’s fault#roots my beloved but also I have never felt this much genuine hatred for a fictional character before#she legitimately caused the main conflicts‼️ she’s horrible!! and not even in a funny way!!#I’m not gonna pretend finch isn’t a total jackass just because I think he’s funny alright? he is#but he’s ENTERTAINING he at least DOES HIS JOB AS A JACKASS well#I Love villains but not when they’re ACTING LIKE THEYRE NOT ONE. COUGH COUGH MIYYYAAA 🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕#miya is such a horrid. horrid thing#I’m needlessly heated over this but this hatred has been brewing for a year now#exactly a year now in fact. happy one year anniversary of the start of my unhealthy hatred of this fictional character#I need to calm down I need to calm the FUCK down#she is SO STUPID like ACTUALLY she could’ve fixed the cause of the main conflict before it even happened#but she Didn’t she DIDNT I need to CALM DOWN#if miya has zero haters then I am dead
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btw funniest option for reverseverse archangel siblings is that lucifer & michael are the twowith the dead mom killed by a demon, and gabriel and raphael are accidents that happened along the way that chuck kidnapped
#they are all still related their family situation is just a freakshow#gabriel and raphael’s moms ARE alive. they just were kidnapped a little bit kind of#this is actually very angsty if you look at it too long and ends up with a lot of turmoil from each of them because michael & lucifer like.#This Is Their Family Mission. avenge their mom. who is. Undecided Character At This Time. because im not one of those losers who makes#becky a dead wife. but someone’s gotta be the dead wife around here you know?#but anyway my point was. this is Everything to them. but its. not at all the same for raphael and gabriel.#like at this point yes they want in because those are their brothers and their grief is shared grief but at the same time. they have moms.#they haven’t been allowed to see their moms but theyre out there.#this is getting too angsty. i said this was the funny option specifically because i think it would be hilarious if chuck’s condom broke 2x#and then he had to take care of even more babies (read: hand them off to michael)#this would also mean that raphael & gabriel are significantly younger circa s1 of reverseverse. like adam-aged#i think chuck does just leave them somewhere and fuck off to do his own thing. maybe with michael but maybe just in a motel room somewhere#they’re like 15-16 and just completely abandoned. i think that does fuck them up a little. even more than it does michael & lucifer.
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she talks, he talks | max verstappen
pairing: max verstappen x reader
summary: max verstappen loves to talk, you love to talk. match made in heaven.
liked by charles_leclerc, alexandrasaintmleux, landonorris, and 625,048 others!
yourusername: skiing with cha except he eats shit every five minutes
view comments below!
user1: YN AND CHARLES CONTENT
user2: WE CHEERED!!
charles_leclerc: NOT every five minutes
yourusername: 🤨
charles_leclerc: like every ten minutes…
user3: i really needed some yn and charles content after that HORRIBLE triple header
user4: i need yn and charles content 24/7
user5: is this his girlfriend?
user6: ew no
user7: yn and charles have been friend since childhood. his gfs name is alexandra!!
user8: did you guys see those paparazzi pictures?? they were so funny
user9: LMAOOO YEAH yn talking her ass off while charles was just 🧍 staring dead at the camera
user10: he looked like he was trying to communicate for help with his eyes
user11: charles loves himself some yappers
alexandrasaintmleux: thank you for sending me that five minute compilation of charles eating shit
yourusername: anything for you my love <33
charles_leclerc: can you guys stop bonding over my hurt
alexandrasaintmleux: no!
carlossainz55: please send me that video
georgerussell63: me as well!!
alex_albon: me too!
maxverstappen1: ooo me too!!
landonorris: please send that video my way
oscarpiastri: me too!
lewishamilton: i would like to see that video!
charles_leclerc: you’re all sick.
user12: wait now i need that video
user13: PLS POST IT YN PLS
user14: yn and charles going on vacation alone while he has a gf is so…weird
user15: not really?
user16: his like his sister bro 💀 you’re making it weird
user17: alex is clearly ok with it so why is it weird??
user18: i’m pretty sure they were with other friends
user19: and even if they weren’t that would be okay!! because they are grown ups who can do whatever they please
user20: you know who would be great friends??
user21: max and yn
user20: you literally READ my mind
user21: it would be literally the 2 yappers against the world
user23: you guys are geniuses
user24: i can’t believe with all the races yns been to she hasn’t met max 😔
user25: they obviously know OF every other, they just havent met face to face  
user26: one photo pls just one photo of max maxplaining and yn ynplaining pls
— yn ln has posted new pictures!
liked by charles_leclerc, alex_albon, and 649,028 others!
yourusername: leo and his favorite aunt + his favorite max (>ᴗ•)
view comments below!
user27: OMG THEYRE FRIENDS NOW
user28: yappper mets yapper
user29: charles’s two yappers are friends
user30: his two worlds are colliding
user20: i made this happen guys
user31: no bc they definitely saw that comment and were like “yep! we’re friends now!”
charles_leclerc: you’re his only aunt
yourusername: your point?
charles_leclerc: of course you’re his favorite aunt, you have no competition
yourusername: yeah…i still don’t understand where you’re going with this
maxverstappen1: yeah charles, be more clear with your words
yourusername: he realllyyy needs to know how to communicate better 🙄
maxverstappen1: HONESTLY!! it’s soo annoying when he won’t just spit something out
yourusername: you are SO right max
user32: oh yeah, this is a good combination
user33: the yappers are yapping
user34: they just became friends and they’re already ganging up on charles 😭
user35: do you guys think she’ll go to hungary?
user36: UGH I HOPE SHE DOES
user37: okay guys listen…the last 3 gps were ASS for charles right???? and the last race yn was at was…. MONACO and who won that?? YEAH CHARLES. she’s the good look charm.
user38: you’ve literally solved the problem
user39: @/yourusername we NEED you in that garage pls yn. i can handle another horrible ferrari weekend
alex_albon: pet play date when?
yourusername: max says leo isn’t allowed to have play dates with other animals until he has a play date with jimmy snd sassy first…
alex_albon: gosh he is so possessive 🙄
maxverstappen1: sassy and jimmy need to be leo’s #1 friend. if he meets other animals then THEY WONT BE HIS #1 FRIEND. is that so hard to understand?
yourusername: makes perfect sense to me 🤷♀️
maxverstappen1: thank you!
charles_leclerc: you guys are aware that he’s MY dog, right?
yourusername: for now 😏
charles_leclerc: WHAT
user40: you guys are saying friends…but i smell relationship
user41: smell? you SMELL?
user42: oh that’s not…
user43: can yall just LET PEOPLE BE FRIENDS
user44: people just don’t believe in the power of friendship anymore
liked by user45, user46, and 64,928 others!
maxverstappenupdates: yn and max caught yapping to others and EACHOTHER at the hungary grand prix today!
view comments below!
user47: fork found in kitchen
user48: clap if your surprised
user49: dead silence
user50: this is actually so cute
user51: RIGHTT?? like he talks, she listens, she talks, he listens
user52: does anyone want to role play yn and max with me
user53: ?
user54: i’ll be yn
user53: great! i’ll be max
user54: ??
user55: the first race with yn and max being friends and they’re already like this 🤞
user56: i need her in the redbull garage next
user57: it think that would cause charles to explode
user58: i’m gonna say what everyone is too scared to say…they would be a cute couple
user59: DONT LET THEM SILENCE YOU
user60: man be QUIET
user61: y’all see the opposite sex interact and don’t know how to act
user62: they’re both so expressive when they talk and it makes they’re conversations so much better
user63: i was there and i overhead part of their conversation…tell me why they were talking about which one of them could outrun a f1 car
user64: my bet is on yn
user65: nah i don’t think so, max is an athlete
user66: yeah but he’s also the type to fall on his ass 3 seconds into the run
user67: BUT SO IS YN
user68: they are literally made for each other
user69: they make it so hard to just believe there friends
user70: THE WAY THEY LOOK AT EACHOTHER!!!
user71: FRIENDS DO NOT LOOK AT EACHOTHER THAT WAY
liked by landonorris, charles_leclerc, and 652,084 others!
yourusername: skiing with someone who won’t wipe out every 10 minutes is great! (๑˃ᴗ˂) and thank you to the random person who took that amazing picture for us! <3
view comments below!
charles_leclerc: on your mind 24/7 🙄🙄
yourusername: the image of you tumbling down the mountain and taking at least 20 people with you will NEVER leave my mind
charles_leclerc: IT WAS WEEKS AGO
yourusername: I BET THE PEOPLE YOU TOOK DOWN WITH YOU STILL REMEMBER
charles_leclerc: LEAVE ME ALONE
landonorris: i’m a much better skier then that guy 😒
maxverstappen1: please tell me where she asked
landonorris: just sayinggg
user72: jealous max?
user73: IM THE ONE WHO TOOK THE PHOTO!!
user74: omg how was it??
user73: SOO CUTE!! they made a snowman and made like 20 different snow angels 😭
user74: OMG THATS SO THEM
user75: does this not look like soft launching to you?
user76: they make it so hard to keep saying their just friends…
user77: what type of friends take vacations alone together
user78: charles and yn…
user77: oh you got me there
georgerussell63: those are awesome glasses
maxverstappen1: i just threw them away
georgerussell63: why would you do that?
maxverstappen1: i tend to do the opposite of whatever you say is great
georgerussell63: okay rude.
user78: those glasses are fire 🔥
user79: why are they lighting up? and where did he get them??
user80: that first picture is absolutely gorgeous
user81: this is literally soft launching, why is nobody freaking out?
user82: what about this is soft launching? its literally just them hanging out
user83: oh to be hanging out with max making snow angels with him
user84: they would be so cute together
user85: this is a date and nobody can convince me otherwise
user86: OH BROTHERRR
— max verstappen has posted new photos!
liked by yourusername, charles_leclerc, and 972,018 others!
maxverstappen1: launching us straight into the moon 🚀
view comments below!
user87: yapper and yapper together my dreams have come true
maxverstappen1: @/yourusername
yourusername: you get me 💕
user89: what did i fucking say. i want EVERYONE who told me i was crazy for saying they were together to APOLOGIZE.
user90: i’m sorry, truly
user91: yeah thats my bad, sorry!
user92: my bad 😬
user93: i still think theorizing about someone’s relationship is weird but okay!
user94: i’m sorry…
user95: y’all really had me out here defending your “friendship” 😕
user96: RIGHT! i feel so embarrassed
user97: truly a defining moment for me
user98: i really wanted a man x woman FREINDship to shove into people’s faces
user99: you always have yn and charles!
user98: it’s just not the same :(
user100: but they are really cute together
user101: yeah..they are
charles_leclerc: finally! she has someone else to talk too other then me…
yourusername: hey! i have other friends 😠
charles_leclerc: name 3
charles_leclerc: WHO ARENT RELATED TO ME OR WHO ARENT ON THE GRID
yourusername; okay frick you??
maxverstappen1: it’s okay liefde, i’ll listen to you talk forever
yourusername; thank you maxie 💕
charles_leclerc: barf
user102: does he mean soft launching??
user103: LMAOO I THINK HE DOES
user104: happy for you! (i wish that was me soo bad)
user105: i’m soooo normal about this
user106: charles two yappers have officially gotten together…i definitely saw this coming
user107: i knew it!!!
user108: yn posting cute little friendship pictures and max just full force announces their relationship
user109: ugh i love him
. . .
notes: summer school is officially over! i can now spend the rest of my summer writing ( ̄▽ ̄)
thank you for reading!! hope you enjoyed :)
#max verstappen social media au#max verstappen smau#max verstappen x y/n#max verstappen fluff#max verstappen x you#max verstappen fic#max verstappen imagine#max verstappen fanfic#max verstappen x reader#max verstappen#f1 x reader#f1 fanfic#f1 imagine#f1 fic#f1 x y/n#f1 x you#f1 x female reader#f1 social media au#f1 fluff#f1#formula one x you#formula one x reader#formula one x y/n
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judging his studio 🥱🥰
#marius clean those paint spots. NOW.#once they’re there….. they ever leave….#okay but his studio is actually rlly cute#HE JUST NEEDS TO CLEAN!#new date idea: he cleans <3 while i watch <3#ALSO HE NEEDS TO CLEAN THOSE BRUSHES NOW.#MARIUS IF U DONT CLEAN THEM THEYRE GONNA DIE (all of my brushes r dead)
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Seventeen as dads part 2
Seventeen as Dads Part 1 Seventeen Masterlist
→Choi SeungCheol
“Appa, are you hurt?” Siah gets on Seungcheols back as your husband laid on the couch. He just groans in response.
He had gotten drunk the night before and had a horrible hangover happening.
“Don’t worry, I’ll treat you” Siah, the older child says and rushed to her room to bring out her doctors kit.
Cheol manages to open his eyes, but his head still throbbing.
Siah walks into the living room with a toy stethoscope around her little neck and a toy injection in the other hand.
Cheol sees his baby bringing all her doctor toys to him and chuckles. “Are you here to take care of me doctor?”
“I will fix you” she says. “Where does it hurt?”
A smiling cheol points to his forehead. “Here doctor”
She takes the toy injection in the other hand and directly puts it on his forehead. This makes seungcheol laugh. “Thank you doctor, you’re so nice”
→Yoon Jeonghan
“Catch it, catch it” Jeonghan pulls at the rod, with the fish flapping as soon as its out of water.
The fish accidentally slap your 4 year old son in the face. “It's slippery” he says trying his best to catch the fish. Everytime the fish is in his hands, the next second it slips out. You watch on the whole spectacle laughing.
After the boys are done catching 2 fish, your boys rushed to show you.
“Now we eat them” jeonghan says
Horror spread across the 4 year old boys face. He immediately starts whining as jeonghan laughs.
“We can’t eat them, theyre our friends!” The little one yells at his dad.
“Tell him!” He also yells at you to defend him as he cries.
“What do we eat then now? Aren’t you hungry?” Jeonghan asks him touching his sons belly.
“No!” The baby says with every conviction in him.
“What do we do with these fish?”
“Take them back home and raise them”
“They’re already dead”
This earns your husband a playful smack to his arm. “Don’t say that” as both of you try to stifle giggles.
→Hong Joshua
“Happy Birthday Dojoonie” your husband, Joshua, wishes his elder son who turned 6 today.
Little did he know, he had a Surprise waiting for him outside in the yard.
"We have a surprise waiting for you outside" you tell him and his little legs rush to take him to the front yard.
"No way" He screams in excitement.
It was a toy car that he could drive.
"Hey, Hey, mister, safe driving only" you say as he gets on the car.
He drives exactly like Joshua. You giggle at that. "He has the same driving face as you" you say to Joshua looking at your son driving away.
"I don't have a driving face" he defends.
"You do!" and you mimic the face he makes while he concentrates on driving.
"He's learning everything from me" Joshua exclaims.
"Im glad, you're a wonderful man Joshua"
"Thank you for saying that, darling" he says wrapping his hand around your torso while you look at your son not braking in time and crashing.
"And thats a crash" you say and both of you rush to him to do damage control.
→Wen JunHui
"It won't hurt, I promise"
Your son is wailing and hiccuping through his sobs, he is terrified of his tooth falling. It's his first milk tooth and that tooth has been dangling for 2 weeks now.
He has a birthday party to attend and he wants to eat everything and anything but the tooth won't let him. So Jun came up with a solid idea of pulling it out himself. As much as I am against it, you kid really wants it taken out but is also scared of it.
"See, we're going to tie this tooth to this floss and the other end to the door handle okay? then you can push the door shut when you're ready, the tooth will fall out" your husband calmly explains.
The boy looks terrified.
"It won't hurt, promise" he says.
Your son holds your hand tight as Jun ties the floss to the door.
"3" his grip on your hand tightens.
"2" his jaw clenches.
"1"
your son kicks the door and the tooth comes out in one swift motion. Your son is ecstatic as he rushed to your side to hug you.
"I did it mama"
"You did, my sweet boy, now you can eat all the hard candies you want at Dojoon's birthday!" you say and he smiles at you front tooth missing, You giggle at his missing tooth.
"What about daddy, I did all the heavy lifting" Jun sulks.
→Kwon Hoshi
Your son jiho has been climbing everything he can reach, he's at that age where his feet are faster than his body. This time he was climbing the kitchen counter making steps out of the drawers. Its dangerous.
"soonyoung, he's been climbing everything, we need to change in child safety on the drawers, it's all broken now"
"I'll get them on the way back from work tomorrow"
Soonyoung sits in front of Jiho with a tiger soft toy, Jiho's favourite.
Soonyoung pretends to voice the tiger and starts talking to jiho.
"Jiho, its me, your favourite tiger, your dad can't hear us"
This snaps Jiho's attention to the tiger. He smiles at the tiger and says the cutest hi.
"Your dad told me you've been climbing chairs and drawers, you shouldn't do that, it is dangerous"
"dangers?"
"yes, dangerous, you could fall and give yourself a ouchie then the doctor will give you an injection"
"no injection"
"You shouldn't climb"
"I'll go now" soonyoung says to jiho in the tiger voice.
"Tiger told me not to climb" he tells his dad immediately.
"It speaks?"
"Only I can hear him, he's my best friend that's why"
"Is that so?"
"Yes"
→Jeon Wonwoo
"Daddy its torn, its torn" your 4 year old comes to you and your husband in the living room talking about his day.
"What's torn honey?" you ask looking down at her. Your daughter holds up Ms. Kiki.
Your sweet sweet baby girl, Min ju, had this one teddy bear she carried around everywhere. Ms. Kiki. It was her emotional support soft toy. She'd bring it to trips, to restaurants and even to the doctors, where she needed it the most.
"Ms. Kiki" she was bawling her eyes out. Wonwoo takes her in his lap. You inspect the tear, it was just a tear on the stitch, a few hand stitches should do the trick.
"Can I do it after I come back?" you had to head out to a meeting in some time.
she starts to whine a little again.
"Daddy will do it" wonwoo chimes and she becomes happy again.
"Ill fetch you the sewing kit, just stitch it here," you tell him showing him where.
The father daughter duo sit side by side, as Minju waits for her dad to sew it slowly.
he pricks himself with the needle the first try and hisses.
"Does it hurt daddy?" Min ju asks.
"Not it doesn't its a pinch" he says and continues sewing while you change into your work clothes.
"After 5 minutes he was done. "Tada!" wonwoo holds up the bear to minju, she was ecstatic.
You were ready to go and stopped by wonwoo to see what he did, and he did a pretty good job.
"Good job!" you praise him.
"Daddy is the bear doctor"
"Bear doctor sounds like a great title"
→Lee Jihoon
You had come to visit Woozi's studio with your 3 year old Daughter Jia, Jihoon wanted to show her his new studio with a lot of lights, he thought the baby would enjoy it.
The light projecting stars and colourful galaxies, he called it the universe factory. Quite a cute name. He was the hottest looking man when he was in his studio focusing and working. One of the reasons you fell for him.
"So? How do you like it?" he asks.
"It looks beautiful, it's so pretty" looking up in wonder.
Your baby, Jia also is looking up adoring the roof and pointing to the stars she sees.
"Stars!"
"So pretty" your child mumbles.
Your daughter now was in his lap, pushing all buttons possible and some beats and sound start to come out of the speakers. Almost like she was making music herself.
"She seems like a natural" he says to her and takes her off the keys before she deletes important files.
"A few years, she'll come for your job Mr. producer"
→Lee Dokyeom
"It's mommy birthday so we're going to bake a cake, but you have to promise me princess you're not going to eat the cake before that" Dokyeom sternly but the 2 year old babbling baby only looks up to see her boba eyes staring at him.
"You're too cute to scold" he says and starts making the cake.
Midway through the icing, Dokyeom was too focus on making the icing, he didn't realise the other side of the icing on the cake was getting eaten, little by little.
Your daughter's little fingers had swiped away at the icing one by one making a big icing mine in the cake. The back of the cake was eaten and ruined, but Dokyeom could not get angry at her. She looked too cute with icing all over her face.
"Here's a strawberry" Dokyeom tells her and hands her a strawberry to eat while he tries to save the cake.
"Finally done, you think mom would like it?" Dokyeom holds the cake to his toddler. "mmh" she hums to the strawberry she had in hand.
You had just returned from a long day of work, all you wanted was to cuddle your two main babies and go to sleep.
You come back to a dark living room and a startling noise.
"Surprise! Happy Birthday Baby!" Dokyeom says with your precious daughter in his arms and a strawberry cake.
"What's with the cake?" you ask looking up at him, then realising your little princess probably ate while making it.
Her hands held a half eaten strawberry as you take her from your husband and shower her with kisses.
"What about me!" Dokyeom sulks and you shower him with kisses too.
"Best Birthday ever"
→Kim Mingyu
Bora haas been wanting a make up set like you have for ages. Mingyu promised to get her a kids make up set on the way back from work today, and he did.
Bora was so excited she started to jump around the living room.
It was a cute toy, with a mirror and brushes and everything. You just hoped it's goes okay on her skin and doesn't damage it.
"Thank you! Thank you!" her little frame hugs Mingyu.
She opens the kit and gets everything out.
"Appa, do you want to be the first customer of my salon?" she says.
He pretends to be a customer. "Hello, I would like a make over please" he says in a fake customer voice that makes your daughter giggle.
She happily obliges and puts this towel in his collar for his shirt. Quite thoughtful.
Bora roughly brushes over his face with some powder from the kit, being careful with it ends up going into mingyu's mouth and he blows raspberries to get it out.
"What kind of a salon is this?" he says giggling. Bora only laughs.
She finishes her masterpiece with a lipstick on her dad's face. a little over drawn but cute nevertheless.
"Tada!" she says as she holds up the mirror to his face.
"Do you feel beautiful daddy?"
"I feel so beautiful baby" he says and Bora runs to her room to bring one of her play wigs to put on her dad's head.
It was a golden bright wig with pigtails to complete the look.
You sneakily take a picture on your phone as you laugh.
Bora laughs too. "Daddy you look like a clown"
This comment makes you laugh even more coming from your daughter.
"Let's go mommy next!" Mingyu suggests with playful evil eyes and you almost run away before mingyu could catch you.
→Xu Minghao
"Daddy, it's tea time, cmon! cmon!" your younger daughter grabs your husbands hand and drags him to her room.
"Why am I not invited?" you pout.
"it's only for daddy"
She's seen Minghao do his tea ceremony often. He stopped a while before, but once your daughter was born, Minghao and your daughter started play dates where they would pretend to drink tea, you found it cute.
"How is daycare?"
"No one likes to play tea party" she complains as you watch this interaction.
The little girl pours the 'tea' its just water, into the her father's cup and her cup.
"Why?"
"I'm not sure, but I have you to play with me"
"You do, I'll play tea party with you all day" Minghao says picking up the cup and putting it to his lips.
"Appa, stick your little finger out, like this" she says and demonstrates.
"Ah yes, how can I forget" he says and does as told.
Your daughter really had him wrapped around her little finger. It was adorable to watch.
→Boo Seungkwan
"Stand here and shoot" seungkwan tells your 7 yer old son.
You were at the basketball court where seungkwan was teaching your son, Channie.
"Shoot, don't get on your toes" he yells at him from the sideline.
He finally makes a score and you cheer. Seungkwan looks very satisfied with himself.
"Let's do a mother son vs dad" you suggest and run into the court to start a match.
"Oh its on"
You jump on seungkwans back while his guard is down and, it becomes difficult for him to steal the ball from Chan and Chan scores. You put both your hands up in the air in celebration.
"Your dad's not that great at this after all" you say sassily to your husband kissing his cheek from the back.
"we'll see, we'll see, get off me! no cheating this time" he warns with a playful smile.
"We'll try"
This time you decide to take both his hands in yours and literally pull him away from the court while your son attempts to score. He misses twice and Seungkwan pretends to escape to save the ball.
Chan finally scores and seungkwan doesn't let your hand go though.
"We won!" you exclaim in your husbands face.
"Come here sneaky" he says wrapping his hands around your waist, not letting you go.
"You're not going to score this time" he says and throws you over his shoulder and grabs your son by the torso holding him with his arm.
It was all laughs and giggles.
→Choi Vernon
"AAH" you hear a shriek coming from the living room. It was your husband Vernon, running to the bedroom to you.
"There's a bug on the wall, bug on the wall"
You can deal with smaller bugs, so you walk out confidently, assuming it's a smaller bug, but it was indeed a big bug.
Your 4 year old Derek, had come out of his room hearing the shriek.
"It's a bug?" he asks, while you hold a container to catch the bug and Vernon hiding behind you, neither of you taking any action to actually catch the bug.
"Derek will catch it for you" your son says in third person and bravely goes to the bug, climbing the couch to for his little hands to get to it.
"Are you sure he's my son?"
"What do you mean? Of course he's your son!" you exclaim.
You see Derek picking up the bug by its wings and asking you to stretch the container, you outstretch your hand with the container as far as you could. The bug really gave you the ice and made your body shudder.
"Done! Here's your new home bug!" Your 4 year old talks to the bug that's now in the container.
You and Vernon share a look.
"Aw my baby, protects me from bugs" you pat Dereks back.
"That was nothing" he boasts, trying to impress his mom.
Lee Chan
"What do you think?" you husband, Chan, had just shared with you the most evil plan to prank your daughter. He wanted you in on it.
"She's going to cry" you warn him.
"It's a prank, we'll teach her to be a good sport" he justifies.
"You father daughter do what you want" you let it go. You eerily sound like what your mom used to say and that makes you chuckle internally.
"Okay, I'm gonna go hide it all"
The living room was a mess with all of Yu Na toys as she played in the living room.
"Yu Na" her father appears from the bedroom, "I have to tell you something"
Yu Na thinks its batch time and start whining, she hates bath time.
"It's something else" Chan clears and she calms down.
"Appa was hungry, so Appa ate something that was Yu Na's" he starts.
"My chocolate cake?" she asks in her little voice.
"There's chocolate cake in the fridge?" he looks surprised.
"Yeah, Uncle Dokyeom brought it yesterday"
"Ah, did he? I didn't eat that"
"What did you eat?"
"I ate all your halloween candy"
She looked like she was about to cry, her lips even turned downward. but what came out of her mouth was so precious.
"You were hungry?"
"Yes baby, I was"
"It's okay because you were hungry. You are supposed to eat when you're hungry and I love you so it's okay"
Chan and you were stunned to hear that. She hugs Chan and you give him a heartfelt look.
"This prank turned out wholesome" he says to you.
"Daddy didn't eat all your candies, we were just joking" you explain to your child.
"Just joking?"
"Yeah, we can have some after dinner" the little girl leapt in excitement and ran into the kitchen.
"We're raising the sweetest girl"
"All thanks to you, my love" he takes your hand and you smile at him.
____
I've been writing this ALL day, this is like 13 fics, I had so much fun though.
#svt imagines#svt preferences#seventeen#carats#caratland#svt scenarios#svt jun#svt hoshi#svt wonwoo#svt woozi#svt minghao#svt Mingyu#svt dokyeom#svt seungkwan#svt vernon#svt dino#dad svt#seventeen dad#dad!scoups#dad!svt#lee chan#dino x reader#seungkwan x reader#hoshi x reader#woozi x reader#svt fluff#svt#scoups x reader#jeonghan x reader#joshua x reader
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Demons and Humans not understanding each other
Inspired by several other posts I read about this same thing <3 honestly even if the brothers insisted it was safe, I would consult Satan, Lucifer or Barbatos
this is mostly mammon freaking out
Humans think the deadliest things are like, adorable, like Cerberus. Mammon especially does not understand why Mc wants to run towards the very dangerous, very mad three headed dog. A few times he has had to throw Mc over his shoulder to keep them from staying behind
“MC CERBERUS BEING THE BEST BOY DOES NOT JUSTIFY HIS ACTIONS HE WANTS TO KILL US”
“But he’s so cute! He just needs a snuggle buddy”
Humans can also be very stubborn if they’re too hot or cold but refuse to admit it. It’s fine with Lucifer does it because he’s one of the most powerful and therefore resilient demons in Hell, but not so much when Mc does it. Beel and Mammon love playing in the Devildom snow, but given that it’s the Devildom, it’s definitely a lot colder than it is in the human realm. Even after ten layers, Mc is still freezing but refuses to admit it.
“Mc, are ya shivering? I thought ya would be too warm under all that”
“I’m sweating with this one jacket”
“I’ll live! Let’s go back to the snowman”
“no I don’t think you will”
On the same note, sometimes demons forget humans can’t withstand crazy temperatures. Asmo will invite Mc to a popular bathhouse, sauna or hot springs, forgetting that the temperature would literally boil Mc alive
“Hey Asmo this is the place you wanted to go, right?”
“Yes! Isn’t is cute?”
“Everything except the part where I boil alive”
“what!”
Some foods can kill humans just by being near them so imagine how the brother would feel when they learned this, it’s giving that lunatic pudding incident with Diavolo from that one card
“Mc! You’ll love this. Open wide!”
“Asmo I feel funny”
“DO NOT FEED MC THE TAKEOUT LUCIFER SAID ITS DEADLY FOR HUMANS IN LARGE AMOUNTS”
“FUCK NOT AGAIN”
In retrospect, humans probably sleep a lot compared to demons. Some demons probably don’t sleep at all, except Sloth demons. Setting aside about eight to nine hours of the day just to sit idly might not make sense to them until they learn they will shut down without it
“How are you feeling about the exam we just took? Exam week is finally over.”
“Mc? Mc, Satan is talking to you. Why are you on the floor”
“MY HUMAN IS DEAD”
“No, I think they’re just asleep idiot”
“oh. wait, THEYRE ASLEEP IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HALL lucifer is gonna kill me”
I’d say both demons and humans are social creatures, but humans will go insane without social interaction. Yeah a demon would probably be upset if they didn’t talk to someone for thousands of years but I don’t think a human could last more than ten without losing grip on reality. Humans tend to copy each other, which is probably bizarre to demons. Humans don’t even understand yawning so demons definitely won’t
Going back to the food thing, demons can probably go ages without eating, besides Gluttony demons. Humans need to eat so frequently compared to them
“So you’re tellin’ me that if Mc doesn’t eat for a whole week, their insides start to eat themselves?!”
“Yes. But, Mc ate a few hours ago.”
(Mammon was already gone when Satan turned back around)
Demons probably also play game that would definitely kill humans. My brother and I used to play crazy games when we were little (our favorite game didn’t have a name but we would put Barbies in the toy train tracks and see what would happen when different Thomas and friends character would hit her. The train tracks would glow in the dark! I did not let him put my favorite doll in the train track and he had to listen since I was the older one, she was not a barbie and had bendy feet? that’s not for now) but we never seriously got at each other throats. I cannot imagine what games demons and demon children must play. Satan was born fully grown but imagine if he was born little and the brothers had to play his favorite games with him. I feel like they would find the Barbie game I played a little weird too. Like, they would probably tell me that I should’ve done it in real life since that would be better experience or something batshit like that
“Aww, Satan, do you remember all the times we played “Five minute eye stab” with Lucifer? You were so cute. Sometimes I think Luci let you win.”
“Do not talk to me Asmodeus.”
“I’m sorry, you played what?”
“One time we gave him an actual knife by accident and since he was good, he ended up stabbing Lucifer’s eye.”
“You’ll be next if you don’t shut up and let me read”
“HE WHAT”
“Oh he’s fine now, clearly. Only took him a few hundred years to regain normal eye functions”
“Can we not talk about this anymore?”
Babe it is a miracle Mc is still alive
#obey me#obey me!#obey me belphie#obey me satan#obey me asmo#obey me beel#obey me levi#obey me mammon#obey me luficer#obey me x reader#obey me mc#headcanons#gn reader
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jaehaerys administration dashboard simulator
🫧maidenpooled Follow
listen i know all kingsguard are bastards but jonquil darke put a cigarette out on me. i think i huave shivers
♟️redwhine
ok bootlicker. you know what she did
🫧maidenpooled Follow
boots not the only thing id lick
🌸queencrowned Follow
this could literally be me and my brother if it weren't for my bitch mom trying to send me to the other side of the fucking continent
🍒saerious
GIRL STAND UP
🤎bowlofbrown
doctrine of exceptionalism meatriders when someone asks them why 75% of dragonstone is blonde and me and half of flea bottom have gleaming amethyst eyes and/or beautiful delicate cheekbones
🥀maegorwife Follow
that's different...targaryens are literally divinely ordained by the seven to rule because they're stronger and better than us...that's why they have the dragons it is in their sanctified valyrian blood
🩸knifeinthedark
SO TRUE...THEY WANT TO ABOLISH THE RIGHT TO FIRST NIGHT BECAUSE OF WOKE. AND YET THEY STILL DO IT. BUT NO ONE CAN SAY ANYTHING ANYMORE OR THOSE GENDER-NEUTRAL DRAGONS WILL BURN YOUR KEEP DOWN
🤎bowlofbrown
cannot stand this fucking website. spending my last silver stag on tyroshi blue hair dye im not going to be associated with you people.
🍒saerious
oh so when maegor has seven wives he’s “aegon’s true son” and “cool” but when i have three boyfriends suddenly im a “whore”
🫀lustywench Follow
op i support you but they did call him “the cruel” for that it was a very important part of the story that he was in fact maegor “the cruel”
🌟sevenpointedstar
🌗maidensgrace
doing all of this with a FAITH OF THE SEVEN URL...girl you better pick a hell and start hoping
#bring back the faith militant
❄️theythemderly
hey isn’t it weird that so many of the king’s children have suddenly and mysteriously died lately. under the care of the maesters. what if they’re planning something…,
🕯️glasscandled
ugh i wish🙄 speed that shit up fr
🥵ullerscorpion
likes charge reblog cast
😈themarcherrrrrr-deactivated5699
me when im in a being dead combination and my opponents are jaehaerys' whole army of childraeyn of the corn
🙌fleabottomtop
yoooooooo theyre quarrelling again.
🙌fleabottomtop
alysanne targaryen if you're reading this i could change your life just give me one chance let me hit
🙌fleabottomtop
there are gold cloaks outside of my house
⚔️errantmaid Follow
kingsguard dick is good as fuck when you don't have a motherfucker in your ear saying it violates a sacred vow made in the eyes of the king and the seven😜
⚔️errantmaid Follow
the king chopped it off and sent him to the wall i fucking hate this place can't have SHIT in king's landing
🏵️floriansjonquil
hey has anyone seen princess gael. it's been literal months and she seems to have up and disappeared with no official announcement from the palace? would be the third female relative to go missing in the king's custody after aerea and saera....
🐝beeeeeeeeeeeeesbury Follow
damn that's crazy. im sure shes fine though anyways i'm a big fan of this new road the king built theres a lot of nice new roads does anyone else like the roads
🐦⬛cloakedinfeathers Follow
day 18262 of not fighting the brackens. this is boring as fuckkkkk what am i supposed to do. pretend to care about the triarchy?
🐎brackennation
kill yourself
🐦⬛cloakedinfeathers Follow
192.158.1.38. doxxed. get your dumbfuck horse breeder knights ready because our strongest and noblest raven warriors are on the way to your nasty ass keep right now bitch
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laughing so bad imagining foxes vs kevjean
kevin: guys this is my boyfriend jean yayyyy yippeeeeee!!! 😁😁😁😁😁😁😁😁😁😆😁😆
foxes: EWWWW NOOOOOOO EWWWWWWW BOOOOOOOOO GODDDD EWWWWWWW GAGGGGG
how would you feel if your friend who is known for being bad at standing up for himself started dating someone he met at the worst point of his life and that person, on top of being extremely mean and hateful, not only has worked against the best interest of you and your friends in the past but also had a brief situationship with another friend of yours a few months before. and he’s FRENCH. let’s be real they’re eating jean up in that groupchat. my man is getting rinsed. no survivors
almost none of that is jean’s fault within context but the foxes are very unsympathetic people with a knack for assuming the worst of every situation. i would give jean perhaps five minutes of civilized conversation with any of them before someone asks if he’s planning on fucking anyone else in their friend group soon
#the jean moreau hate crusade is real#THEYRE FUNNY. THEYRE REALLY FUNNY#jean wouldnt let them go easy either so its all very hateful. all of it#i joke about this a lot but this is literally a Worse people youve ever met situation#when kevin drops the news they’re dating it’s silent#it’s dead silent. sepulchral silence. morbid silence#kevin might as well date gorilla next#hey does anyone know any serial killers in the area who are single and ready to mingle? yeah kevins apparently dating his way through#the dsm5#asks#kevjean
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im in love with your content omg😭 your writing style is just chefs kiss
can i req a reader with the tf141 being on a mission and hearing an enemy say something in british slang and they just go "what did they just say.." in comms? like a reader who doesnt know anything about slang like not even that bars in the uk r called pubs (if im not wrong) and just nods whenever a private talks in slang, and their brain is just trying to figure out what they just said?
its just a really silly plot with a silly reader :3
pardon? — python333
— — — —
synopsis just as the req says, you know nothing about british slang and on a mission the enemy speaks british and you dont know what theyre saying :3
relationships platonic!taskforce 141 & reader.
characters cap. price, soap, ghost, gaz.
word count 2.6k
warnings 2nd person pov [you/yours/yourself], usage of c/n [code name/call sign].
note HI YES I LOVE THIS REQ!! i take every opportunity i can to make fun of british people so this is right up my alley!! tysm for the compliments hjfhdjskf recently ive been getting more praise on my works and it makes me so happy i love yall. again, sorry if this sounds a little rushed or if any parts are incoherent, i wrote this at 12/1am and im both more productive and write more nonsense at this time + this one is wayyyy shorter than ones i usually do because i didnt know what else to write for it so i apologize for that as well! this is pure fluff and humor (i like to think im funny) so enjoy!!
“—eah, and now we have to camp out here ‘cause he can’t be arsed to do it ‘imself, so I feel like we should have a chat with the others, see if they’re willing to leg it out of here with us,” An enemy soldier suggests to you, his British accent thick enough that you think it might be cockney.
You cross your arms to hide your shaking hands and nod in agreement, as if you understood anything he said, and put on the same shitty British accent you’d been using for the past five minutes you’d been talking to this guy.
“Yeah, yeah, totally,” You agree, clearing your throat before asking, “You know where the others are stationed?”
“You don’t?” He asks, raising an eyebrow at you suspiciously.
“Mate, all the orders I was given went in one ear and out the other,” You sigh, holding back a wince at your desperate attempt to sound more natural using British slang, “I just know I’ve got to stand out here and shoot the enemy.”
The enemy eyes you suspiciously and he takes a moment to try and read your face before he says, “I don’t think I’ve seen you before, actually. Which would be weird, if we’re in the same platoon, don’t you—”
You sigh and quickly pull out the small switchblade you had hanging on your belt, stabbing the enemy in the neck before he can say anything else and grabbing him before he can drop to the ground, putting a hand behind his back as you half lead half drag him into a dark alleyway beside the building he was stationed outside of.
You quickly set him down into a sitting position and take your knife out of his throat, tucking the blade back into the handle before adjusting it to latch onto your belt once again, letting out a frustrated huff as you stare at the now dead man in front of you.
“[c/n], how copy?” Price’s voice crackles through on your ear piece.
You push in the PTT button and lower your voice, “Copy, I fucked up a little bit. One of the guys was onto me.”
“You were there for five bloody minutes,” Gaz’s voice rings through, his tone both disbelieving and amused, “How’d he already catch onto you?”
“The British are smarter than I thought,” You breathe out, standing up and looking around for a ladder to climb to get to higher ground before anyone spots you. You go farther into the alley and find an old, rusty ladder with rungs that look like they’d snap if someone sneezed on them too hard—perfect for climbing up.
You wrinkle your nose as your hand makes contact with one of the rungs but don’t say anything otherwise, instead wordlessly hauling yourself up onto the ladder.
“Reminder that there’s three British people with you, currently,” Ghost’s deadpan tone crackles, his breathing heavy, as you can tell he’s whispering into his mic, “All of which are very smart.”
“I caught you reading the instructions on a box of tea bags the other day, don’t fuckin’ talk right now,” You grumble, slowly climbing up the ladder, hating the creaking noises it makes as you do. It sounds like it’s going to snap at any minute, and you try to go up as fast as you can, but one wrong move and you’ll easily slip, some of the rust that flakes off of the ladder enough to make you slip up.
“They were circles,” Ghost says, exasperated, “I didn’t know if that made a difference.”
“I thought British people were supposed to know everything about tea,” You roll your eyes, putting your hand on the next rusty rung up on the ladder.
“Yeah, L.t,” Soap agrees with you teasingly, the wind hitting his mic, making it obvious that he’s running, “Thought ye Brits were s’possed to ken everything ‘bout tea.”
You laugh quietly to yourself as you finally make it to the top of the building, the top just high enough for you to look at the few soldiers below and hear a majority of their conversations without them noticing you.
You get to the edge of the rooftop and pull the sniper rifle you’d been carrying around off of your back, glad to finally be back in your element rather than trying to get in undercover, and set it up.
You pull the stand out and set it on the edge of the roof, and look through the scope of the rifle, lining it up so that it’s aiming directly at one of the soldier’s heads, specifically the one that was standing directly out of the entrance you originally were meant to try and get into—but doing this didn’t change much.
Regardless of if you got in or not, he would’ve died, and the others would’ve gotten in too. You getting in first was just meant to make it more efficient.
You press down on the PTT button on your earpiece as you look through the scope of your sniper rifle, keeping the aim on the soldier in front of the entrance, “The guy in front of the entrance is just standing still, so whenever you need me to, I can shoot ‘im down.”
“I don’t think we need to get in just yet,” Price hums, “But maybe in a minute.” “M’kay,” You hum, taking your eye away from the scope, instead just looking over at the enemy soldiers. You lay on your stomach, leaning your head down a bit to try and listen in on the enemy’s conversations easier, trying your best not to make yourself too obvious.
The conversations were pretty boring and almost the same for every soldier you’d eavesdropped on, for the most part. Enemy soldiers joking around, talking about what they’ll do once they’re on leave—like they would be able to do that after you completed your assignment—and just some general team camaraderie.
The lackluster subjects of their conversations weren’t bad at all, no, in fact, you could care less what they talk about.
It was their stupid accents you hated.
Are you surrounded by British people everyday? Yes. Does that stop you from hating on the British everyday? No. Okay, maybe the accents aren’t stupid, but God, they had the thickest cockney accents you’d heard in your entire life, and it was making your eavesdropping so much harder, and had almost been the reason you were given away earlier.
They used slang words that you’re certain you’ve never heard before in your life, and used analogies that didn’t even make sense—you heard one of them use the words, verbatim, ‘Don’t get stroppy’. Stroppy? Stroppy?
You narrow your eyes down at the soldiers below you, listening to a conversation they’d just started up.
“—eah, ‘cause he can’t be arsed to do anything about it, so now we have to camp out here and wait for somethin’ to happen,” One of the soldiers scoffs, “I’m telling you, man, if I see that skull-masked bloke runnin’ ‘round out here, I’m legging it from ‘im immediately.”
You draw your eyebrows together in confusion, but you stay silent for now. Isn’t that exactly what the other soldier said? Are they like a hive mind or something?
“You’re legging it?” The other soldier asked, sounding almost incredulous, “What happened to you chattin’ to some of the others about your loyalty and what not?” “All that’s irrelevant when the fuckin’ grim reaper rolls around and starts murkin’ people like he’s been doing for the entirety we’ve been here, mate,” The first soldier laughs, “You think I wanna be here when he does that?”
“Don’t act like a prat about it, man—fuckin’ talking’ like you can outrun him.” “A prat? I’m not—” You tune out the rest of their argument and instead try and figure out what they were saying.
A prat? Legging it? Can’t be arsed? What the fuck? You push the PTT button on your earpiece and as quietly as you can, you ask, “I need some help. Serious help. Life or death situation.” Immediately, Price’s voice rings through, “What? What is it? What happened?” “The soldiers are British and I can’t tell what they’re saying,” You answer, ignoring Price’s relieved sigh on his end, “I need help.” “Jesus, fuck, don’t scare me like that,” Price sighs, taking a few breaths before continuing, “Alright, what do you need help with?”
“Figuring out what they’re saying.” This time, you hear Gaz’s voice crackle through, “Well, you’ve got three British people here—tell us what he’s saying.”
“One of the guys was talking about ‘legging it’ if he saw Ghost heading towards him, and talked about Ghost ‘murking’ people, and then the other guy he was talking to told him he was being a ‘prat’ about it and he got all offended,” You eloquently say into the earpiece, watching as the argument gets a little more heated. You can hear an amused huff from Ghost on his end and a scoff from Soap in return.
“They’re just saying they’re gonna run away if they see Ghost because he’s been killing a lot of their soldiers, and the other guy said he was being a prat, which I guess is like…” Gaz pauses to think of how to explain the slang term before settling on, “Someone who’s kind of full of themselves, I guess. Or ignorant. Either or.”
“They couldn’t just say that?” You muse quietly, still staring down at the enemy soldiers.
“I’m gonna pretend you didn’t just say that,” Price’s voice cuts through, “Go ahead and shoot the guy down. I’m ready to head in.”
“Got it,” You hum, quickly putting your eye back up to your scope and readjusting it a bit before quietly warning, “Shooting him now.”
You pull the trigger and the enemy goes down immediately, and through your scope you can see the small twitching of his body as the other soldier starts to freak out.
You quickly aim the gun at his still-alive friend and shoot him down as well, silently congratulating yourself on your good aim and continuing to look through the scope, watching as Price runs in with Gaz and a few other soldiers.
They struggle with the door for a moment and you sigh before pressing in the PTT button on your earpiece and quietly saying, “Price, Gaz, move away from the door for a sec.”
Wordlessly, they do as they’re told, and you take the opportunity to line up the gun’s aim with the complex electronic panel on the outside of the door and pull the trigger, shooting the most crucial part of the panel, causing it’s functions to disrupt and as a result, the doors open.
“Thanks for that,” Gaz breathes out as Price kicks open the door, his voice cut off a bit at the end as he takes his hand off the PTT button too quickly in order to follow after Price.
“Uh huh. Of course,” You say offhandedly, taking your eye away from the scope of your sniper rifle and listening to the loud sirens go off in the facility the others break into, and push yourself up so that you can sit up straight to properly watch it. You grunt as you sit up, stretching your arms out for a moment before letting them fall into your lap.
“Are they in?” Soap asks, curious, his voice a little strained and breathy. There’s no loud gusts of wind coming through his mic anymore, and you look around for a moment, before your eyes catch on to him climbing up a ladder to get to the rooftop adjacent to yours.
Your lips twitch into a smile at the sight of him completely clueless to your presence and you press your PTT button to talk.
“Yeah, they’re in,” You say, watching as he finally gets to the rooftop, “Didn’t you hear the sirens?”
You can see Soap’s eyebrows furrowed together in confusion for a moment, and he looks around for a moment before finally seeing you on the rooftop directly next to his, and he looks surprised for a moment before a grin splits across his face. You see him press the PTT button on his mic as well.
“I did, yeah, just wanted tae be sure,” He says into his mic, looking right at you as he does, “It’s a surprise seeing you here.”
“Imagine how I feel,” You muse, almost to yourself, before looking away from Soap and speaking up, “Ghost, you don’t wanna join us on the rooftops?”
“Absolutely not,” He replies almost immediately, making you huff out a small laugh and Soap’s grin grow, “I’m perfectly fine on the ground.”
“Where are you?” You ask, scanning the area around you for Ghost, “I feel like I haven’t seen you this whole time.”
“I’m just behind the facility,” Ghost hums, voice still a low whisper, “I’m gonna be heading in once Gaz and Price make it to the second floor to clean up the first, in case there’s anyone left.”
“You’ve been behind the facility this whole time?” Soap’s voice cuts through, surprised by the fact.
“Mhm,” Ghost hums.
“It’s a bit boring back there, innit?” Gaz’s voice crackles through, his voice a little breathy, “You can sweep the first floor, by the way. Should be nobody left, though. Pretty sure all the soldiers were just faffing around, not doing much.”
“Fucking faffing around?” You ask incredulously to yourself, though apparently your voice is loud enough to make Soap chuckle.
As if he can read your mind, Price’s voice comes through, “Faffing around is just doing nothing or doing nothing particularly productive, [c/n].”
You sigh and push your PTT button this time, talking into your mic, “You couldn’t just say that, Gaz? You had to say something silly like faffing around?”
“It’s not silly,” Gaz says, his frown audible, “They were faffing around.”
“Jesus, fuck,” You breathe out, laughing lightly, “It’s totally silly.”
“No, it’s not.”
“Yeah it is.”
“No it’s—”
“I just want one day where you two don’t start up stupid arguments like this,” Price’s tired sigh comes through, “Just one day, I beg of you both.”
“Aw, Captain, we were just faffing around,” You whine playfully, the misuse of the slang making Soap cover his mouth with his hand to muffle his laughter and you hear Ghost groan into his mic.
“That is absolutely not how you use that,” Gaz says, though you can hear some laughter in his voice—from your very non-British accent saying British phrases, you presume, a small grin gracing your lips at the thought.
“It sounded natural to me,” You lie straight through your teeth, shrugging even though only Soap can see you.
“You’re insufferable,” Gaz groans, making you laugh quietly, “Never use British slang again, please.”
“What if I get a British accent? Will that fix it?”
“Nothing can fix what you’ve said today, [c/n].”
“Well that’s dramatic,” You scoff, “I’ll learn British just for you guys.”
“Holy shit, please stop talking,” Price’s exasperated voice interrupts the both of you, “You’re both insufferable. Drop it.”
“… I don’t think I will,” You say defiantly, making all three British people in the same voice channel as you groan in unison, the sound sounding like some sort of middle school choir trying to sing in harmony, “I’ll use Duolingo or something to learn it.”
“British isn’t a language you learn, you muppet,” Price grumbles, making you snort.
“Muppet?”
“It’s someone who’s dumb and clueless and can’t take a hint, like you,” Ghost defines, “And Soap, most of the time.”
“Daen’t go draggin’ mae into this,” Soap’s voice quickly cuts through, “I haven’t said onything.”
“Uh, yes you absolutely did, earlier, remember?” Gaz argues, ignoring Price’s protests for him to stop arguing, “About Ghost being stupid with the tea thing?”
“Oh, I’ll have you all know—”
“Ghost, don’t start—”
You listen as the once casual, teasing conversation turns into an argument and chuckle quietly to yourself, knowing that they’d be arguing about this until you all finished your assignment.
#here we go again#cod#cod hcs#hcs#captain john price#john soap mactavish#simon ghost riley#task force 141#kyle gaz garrick#platonic taskforce141#task force 141 x reader#platonic task force 141#platonic#platonic task force 141 x reader#platonic cod#price#soap#ghost#gaz#tf141#its currently 1:28 as im tagging this#am#i just watched the thing for the first time like#two hours ago#lowkey terrified but we still up#it was so gross btw#still recommend watching it tho!!#anyway
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new byler gate alert!!!!!
(miniongate master post)
tw: i’ve got super bad grammar pls ignore it
may i introduce to u..! MINIONGATE!!!!!! the theory that ive just invented that mike wheeler and will byers are actually the henchmen of the so loved gru from the despicable me franchise!!! why do i think this? well, well, well, let me tell u!
first of all, their colors.
wowza!!! blue and yellow!!!! also for the fake minions fans, in minions the rise of gru our beloved kevin, bob and stuart fly to california (the west). blue and yellow meted in the west! whoopie!!!!!!!!!!
ok ok sooo second, minions r actually supa gay🤓gear me out!!!! there’s actually so many scenes where there are minions kissing or showing affection to each other (it’s very heart warming tbh) ei:
awwww🥺
anywho. third! so there’s this:
the minions r only stupid boys!!! mike and will believe it or not r boys also they’re stupid. visual aide⬇️⬇️⬇️
so, we’ve gone over why i think mike and will are minions. ‘now how does this relate to them smooching in the next season???’ u might be asking. well, i’m glad u asked!
alright, picture this. it’s the finale, right? everyone’s fighting whatever big bad there is, and will is being vecnaed (vecnaned? vecnaeded? vecneed???) or something. mike is by his side trying to break him out of the trance yk. vecna’s giving will all them horrible sad memories and wills like, “wa wah😭😭ily mike😭waaa i’m gay😢”. but then!!!! vecna shows will a memory that he doesn’t memeber, and will’s all confused. the memory is a minion with a bowlcut looking at a cute minion, and vecna does his scary voice over and he’s like, “mwaha😈😈😈hey bowlcut, do u ember this? heh”. and will’s like “who the flip re these minions???” vecna countinues his spooky voiceover “hah lmao stupid gay boy can’t even rember anything🤣ugh dumbo, this is when u lived with gru and michealminion😈” and then will stared remebeiing EVERYTHING!!! he membered when he was a minion and he kissed mikeminion🫢and when he helped steal the moon and doctor nefario died💔and all his other minion memories. AND THEN HE STARTED SHIMMERING😯😯😯and mike was like “erm what the sigma” so will did one of those magical girl transformations
this except it’s will byers turning into a minion. so now will is a minion, and mike is like “will why ru a minion🧐” and will catches him up on all the minion lore! and mike transforms into a minion as well. and theyre like woohoo we’re minions now, then they rember that vecans still being spooky. so they go in upside down using their minion powers. so they show up and r like “haha vecna henry 1 ur sooo ugly and stinky we dont like u😡” then mike and will use their epic gay minion powers and vecna dies🤩🤩🤩🤩🤩🥳🥳🥳🥳🤩🤩🥳🥳🤩yippee! and now vecna is dead for ever! so u know what that means😏then byler gyat freaky🙁but not supa freaky they just kissed bcuz theyre 14-15 and some ppl needa get a grip🤗🤗also chappell roan started playing🫢and everything thing was right in the world cuz byler is canon!!!!!
anyways!!! thanks for reading!!!!!! let me know any of ur thoughts, theories, opinions on miniongate!!!! peace out
(⬆️art by @cmnzoq )
#i think i smoked to much weed fam😅#miniongate#byler#chappell roan briefly mentioned#byler endgame#byler theory#byler tumblr#byler is real#byler brainrot#gay#mike wheeler is a boykisser#gay mike wheeler#why they so gay#minion#despicable me#churchgate#byler kiss#silly#byler canon#byler is endgame#miwi#poo poo pee pee#freaky#ah 👅#💛💙#byler analysis#byler s5#stranger things#st5 theory#st5 spoilers
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The funniest (& saddest) thing about mr co creator arcane (Christian Linke) (a male that benefits from the patriarchy and its privileges) is that he said the asexual thing all on his own, here is what’s wrong with that, with a deep analysis relating to sociology / the patriarchy:
1: Misunderstanding the asexual definition, thinking it’s some literal „STOP” sign that says *thinking jayce and viktor can be romantic or physical with eachother is illegal* lmao.
2: He said this ALONE. out of his own volition, pretending like he spoke for the WHOLE TEAM OF ANIMATORS, EXECS, WRITERS, ETC….That’s disgusting and to me, sounds like you’re pulling an authority card. which feels severely toxic. you did not make that show ALONE.
3: You can not make a show in which you so obviously gave people many context clues of romantic interest or physical contact / attraction, intentionally, and be like „throwing up card asexual because i think asexual means jayvik dead”. „tHeYrE bRoThErs”. Sir do u interact with your siblings like this? I sure DON’T.
4: Elaboraring on point three, it’s giving SEVERE, homophobia. like SEVERE. You really are trying to throw up some ultimate magic spell to make people think they’re famillial and not queerplatonic or outright romantic…? Like that just signs to me that you dislike seeing gay men (and those rooting for them) win.
5: Elaborating on point 4, i think that usually stems from internalised or societal toxic masculinity. People stereotype gay people as being emotional „softies” and thus „less macho” or less of a (in stereotypical definitions) „man”. But, that patriarchal definition is toxic in and out of its own? so you project „ew they’re not gay but brothers” because ew they’re more emotional than straight men that way!!!! in ur eyes.
6: Building more on that, it comes off as though you are favoring lesbian relationships. Why?Because they are in the eye of the patriarchy, taken more as girls being silly, more broadly accepted because women are less privileged. & some men even fetishise gay women.
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In short Christian Linke, is just someone who benefits from the patriarchy as a privileged male. Especially in comparison to queer men, disabled people and ace people. He does not seem to understand the viewpoint, of the communities he is discriminating, misunderstanding and stereotyping.
#i am so mad#hope this made sense#to me it does#the patriarchy harms all#harms men women queers etc#i am queer and a woman btw#arcane#jayvik#arcane spoilers#viktor arcane#jayce talis#arcane season 2#arcane fandom#jayce x viktor
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