#they would be the MOST fucking chaotic
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#dbtag#silly hours#god#I feel like that's a really clear and consistent thing throughout the entirety of the manga but OTL leave it to Toei!!!!#lays on the floor I wish people were less afraid of letting “good guys” be flawed and selfish and reckless without having to like.#idk vilify them?#like Goku does and always has had a ton of negative qualities about him but what keeps him a protag and what keeps those negatives charming#is that 1) he never promises to be anything Else. If you're upset by his behavior that's a you problem Goku's just doing Goku#He's only upset when Other People get hurt because 2) almost none of those negative qualities contain any malice whatsoever#even as a kid when he was 'i killed that guy' it was like 'i solved a problem why are you mad (gen)' not 'good fucking riddance lol'#and he kept that as an adult too even when he learned more about compassion he's still 'well if you're not gonna stop i have to kill you'#it's never 'fuck off and die' it's always 'listen buddy either you knock it off or i knock you out there is no option c '#and god i love that Goku. I spent so long thinking I hated Goku growing up but I only hated Toei's Goku. Toriyama's Goku is GREAT.#like look if an antagonist is just a hero with the wrong perspective a hero is just a villain with the right one#and the fact that Goku has all of the qualities of a villain with none of the malice or intention makes him SO POWERFUL as a character#Goku doesn't like bystanders getting hurt. That doesn't make him less chaotic and self-centered and simplistic in his worldview.#A hero sacrifices his loved ones to save the world -- a villain sacrifices the world to save his loved ones --#Goku sacrifices himself because you cannot kill him in any way that matters#idskahds anyway here's another essay in the tags for your wednesday evening scroll#the justification the interviewer gave was that the anime was for kids but my beef with that is that Hero Tropes strip chaotic characters#of their emotions. Goku's conflicts are emotional. Goku's power is emotional. Goku's childlikeness keep him authentically emotional.#MORE kids -- ESPECIALLY little boys -- deserve a male protagonist who leans into his emotions to persevere and win.#Super deciding his “angelic state” would kill him makes me want to tear my hair out lmao Goku's EMOTIONS are too strong to hold it.#you could've just asked toriyama about it why'd you decide on the most basic high-stakes shorthand possible OTL#aNYWAY#media analysis#in the tags at least lol
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"duke just seems less traumatized by comparison he just seems mentally stable yknow by comparison, he just seems normal and regular and he's a bat! so hm you know he has to be kinda quirky by definition just not as interesting or competent as the rest of them, you get it!!! he just seems boring by comparison"
do you see how yall sound
#in a fandom where its a constant competition to see whose fave can be the most traumatized most chaotic and surprising#like w the constant output of pov outsiders youd think YOUD THINK that people would try to hide their blatant racism#its like when someone draws a group of characters of all of them are redesigned and have personality and shit except one of them#like we know damn well who u dont give a fuck abt#no need to pretend otherwise#the signal#duke thomas#thought bubbles
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spent the first hour and change at work deleting some old files and am having a grand ol time laughing at myself for not realizing i was a lesbian sooner
#vulnerable tag rambles ahead please be kind abt them i didnt intent to ramble this much but i dont wanna delete it eitehr#me to every single man i have ever dated after 6mo-1y: yeah hey this really isnt working out i dont really know why but i really hate mysel#and i dont want to blame you because i dont think you did anything inherently wrong here; i think this is something about me but i need#space to figure out why im feeling this way [every single one reacted by telling me No i wasnt allowed to leave btw]#i hold very complex feelings about these relationships esp bc of them ending in very violent/chaotic ways most of the time#but its interesting to look back at it all and realize ive left every man for the same reason (which is that ive hated myself Every Single#Time ive dated a man) and its funny bc i recognized the self hate pretty early on w/ cishet men but when it came to queer men it was#much more confusing (esp w/ nto knowing Any lesbians at that point in my life). im so happy im a lesbian tbh#i have a lot of issues w/ the racism fatphobia and transmisogyny present in lesbian groups#and also coming out as a lesbian really truly saved my life. before i met my wife i was quite literally in a 3yr abusive relationship that#definitely would have died in if i hadnt realzied i was a lesbian and ran from him#its also weird seeing liek the hard evidence of the things that happened to me btween 2016-2020 tbh#cause that was such a bad time of my life. i truly dont know how i survived it but im so glad i did#like the three major relationships in my life b4 meeting my wife was: guy who was in college when i was in HS who stalked me when i left;#guy who was a year younger than me who cheated on me the entire time while telling me he was being victimized (he wasnt; this was very mess#guy who saw the very messy toxic ldr i was in and helped me dump my ex then decided that meant we were in a relationship [insert 3 yrs here#and admittedly all 3 years with him werent the same level of abusive but it was definitely unhealthy from the start considering I Didnt Kno#we were together until he wanted to celebrate vday and got mad i didnt know our anniversary - and like this isnt including the other stuff#that happened between those Relatonships[tm] (cause ive never been monogamous; these were just the Major Relationships)#like i genuinely think if i hadnt come out i'd be dead rn given just how dangerous my relationships were/continued getting#i am also so tired now that ive seen all this cause like. fuck i can barely believe it and i not only lived it but have PTSD about it#i should write about my life sometime. i feel like it'd be cathartic to try and make a tangible timeline and stories from the years ang stu#anyway yeah. be nice about the tag rambles. dont message me with pity or curiosity or anything about this. i dont usually talk abt this stu#publicly bc i hate the ways ppl start tryign to baby me when they realize my life has been extremely fucked up until only a few years ago#n im still working on accepting kindness from others bc of [insert life traumas here] but its a long process so pls respect my need for jus#being heard rn w/o too much pressure< 3 (but ig if u do read this can u like it cause i feel a little crazy seeing all the evidence of the#stuff i experienced now also cause fuck ik logically it was but also i cant believe it was all real still yk)
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Okay sound off, who do you think from current DA media is going to become a companion in DA:D and do you think they will be romanceable?
I will bet and eat my Left Shoe that our boy Marius (ostensibly from Magekiller) is going to be a romanceable companion. The build up in the comics around him and his past and his sad wet intense personality- he's a perfect set up for a "I Can Fix Him" companion. I can smell it.
#dragon age#da4#dragon age dreadwolf#its so fuckin funny how people treat him in the comics#his best friend and magehunter partner has a hot spy gf#and is essentially his fucking baseline for normality#cuz on his own he would not speak for fucking days#and then come out with the most unhinged shit#that makes the party look at him like 'maker's balls we need to get this man into therapy'#even stoic Fenris cant relate to him#his sense of humour has aged like fine wine and hammered under the chaotic#nature of the kirkwall gang#and he can't connect with abused ex-slave Marius At All#amazing stuff
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I saw this poll on YouTube and can’t stop thinking about it. In a fight that was Obi-Wan Kenobi and Count Dooku vs Anakin Skywalker and Darth Maul who would win.
#this has so many layers#Anakin and maul would be the most chaotic fuck you the fuck up team#but obi-wan and dooku is the one team up that really could have changed the game#they just each compliment each other well and light or darkside would make a damn good team#Anakin skywalker#count dooku#Darth maul#maul#obi wan kenobi#Star Wars#polls#i am actually mad we never got this
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wouldn't it be nice if the author of the fics finished them. the author is me.
#vent#for the last 4 months my life has been in stupid crisis mode#like constantly#from major ones where i had to move out for a while because it was impossible to stay where i lived#to not being able to use my kitchen for over a week#and like other more or less minor house related stuff that made it impossible for me to use something normally#not a single week without something like that or shit at work which is constantly being so fucking chaotic#and now someone died in my family#not someone very close but i liked them#and of course like feeling sad that they are gone can't be the only thing#because it has to come with the headache of i need to travel for their funeral and it's just before easter#so there's no one in this city to leave my dog with#because most of my friends either live abroad or have cats or are busy before easter..#i'd just want a week where nothing happens#and like the writing is weighing heavy on me#because i miss it#also i wish i could finish something#i wish something good would happen that i could feel proud off#also because i'm mentally ill and fucking stupid when i was going crazy with my kitchen not working and work shit#i bought new furniture#because after 15 years i've finally had enough money to buy some that aren't fucking black and inconvenient and ugly#which is like a huge project and a crisis i brought onto myself#just because i was too burnt out to write#and i wanted something nice to happen to me#like a nice living space that doesn't make feel like i have no ownership over it because everything in it was some else's choice#and that old furniture was bought by my mother and my brother ages ago and it's handmedowns#and my fucking horrible mother feels personally slighted that i want to get rid of a bed that is broken#because my brother's kids jumped on it regularly when they used to visit pre covid#yeah it's been broken that long because i lost all my savings during covid and had to change careers to a souless pointless corpo job#long pathetic whine and overshare over
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I BURNT MY FUCKING SAUCE. I BURNT MY FINGER. I ALMOST BURNT MY NOODLES. RAGE AND HATE ON PLANET EARTH
#this wouldnt earn me a bad grade! this would earn me a reverse invite to fucking cooking class!#daily life thingies#most chaotic kitchen session since i made cake with my cousin and the cake came out of the oven with a mysterious hole in the middle
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i’m crying I just thought of an Alice in Wonderland AU with the junior trio where Jin Ling is Alice, Lan Sizhui is the white rabbit, Lan Jingyi is the Cheshire cat, Lan Wangji is the caterpillar, Wei Wuxian is the mad hatter and Jiang Cheng is the Red Queen
except Wonderland’s creatures and environment are all based on Chinese mythology, flora/fauna, ancient architecture, etc.
like the absolute chaos of this situation, i’m gonna s c r e a m
#the thought of LSZ constantly running around with a fluffy tail and bunny ears while screaming about being late is so fucking funny to me#ahhdajhdAHDAHD#LJY as Cheshire annoying the crap out of JL everywhere he goes lmaoooo#LWJ just trying to meditate on his goddamn psychedelic mushroom#but this whiny Jin kid won’t leave him alone#WWX being an absolute chaotic hatter giving everyone the most whack advice that somehow always ends up being good advice#Jiang Cheng is red queen bc he’s a moody bitch lmFAO#mdzs au#fic ideas#apple babble 🍎#I’m sure the other characters would fit in somewhere I just can’t remember all the other ones rn ajdhajhdja#god now I wanna write this ngl LOL#would be funny as shit if it was just JL having a fever dream#he wakes up to see LSZ taking care of him at the cloud recesses or something#and he’s like#‘where tf is your tail’#ajdhaAJDHAJD
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I somehow managed to watch 6 full episodes of Limited life in one sit... how tf-
#i have like 2 left for limited life and then the entirety of secret life (9)#Also i just realised FUCKING SECRET LIFE FINISHED LIKE A MONTH AGO????#/unr but i just found out that the last vid i watched of grian was ep24 of Hermitcraft s9...#smh limited life seems way less chaotic than its predecessors#I would say double life but last life was definitely the most chaotic so far (imo)#limited life#talking hatrack
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Vyvanse is such a silly little drug. I get up at 11, take it at noon, what's a normal sleep phase I don't know her.
The first hour passes and I'm like "dude nothings happening except me getting sweaty and my heart's going a bit faster" and then I blink and it's another 2 hours later and I've just blitzed doing every chore available to me, organized all my shit for the day, read through 500 tumblr posts, watched some random-ass YouTube clips, and made myself food I don't want to eat because my appetite is suppressed but I know food consumption is a task. It's like all of my ADHD bullshit for the entire day happens at light speed over a few hours.
Then I sit down and can do The Big Task of the day for 5 hours or more and, unlike with a hyperfocus, can remain focused on it even after taking breaks to go do other stuff.
Then the end of the day hits and I'm tired and need to go to sleep but I still feel the Productivity Need so for some reason I watch 50 more "Educational" YouTube videos until it subsides and then finally fall asleep at 2am.
Like. Does it cure my ADHD? Absolutely not. Does it make me less chaotic? No. But does it allow me to consistently channel my ADHD energy productively? Oh, yeah. I'm not 100% sure that's what my doctors were going for when they prescribed it, but I gotta be honest I kinda love it.
#not video games#late nights with ali#nd blogging#actuallyADHD#I'm pretty sure my docs were intending for a bit more... how you say... stability?#but a lot of my ADHD traits don't go away. just the most important one- activation-based executive dysfunction#And honestly without that I think I like the way I function with the rest? usually anyway#If I'm in control of it. I love my hyperfocus. I love my bouncing around chaotically. I love being impulsively spontaneous#don't get me wrong. there are days where I do hate my adhd. when the emotional regulation problems kick in it's hell.#rejection sensitive dysphoria is a bitch. I can forget self care in lieu of 'more important' things. my working memory can fuck me over.#but in comparison to how I lived before medication? it's amazing. and I've learned to be fond of aspects of my disorder#and to live with the ones that are inconvenient. it's so nice honestly#I could do without the sweating and appetite suppression. but it is SO worth it to like my own mind again.#before I was diagnosed I knew I had it. so my only options were self medicating with caffiene and developing an anxiety disorder.#the thing that bypasses the dopamine-based activation is adrenaline-based activation#so I literally just. got so anxious about stuff I needed to do that it would trigger the adrenaline activation where dopamine failed me#I don't think I actually 100% KNEW that's what I was doing per se. but I do think some of my anxiety came from intentional doom spiralling#anyway moral of the story. Vyvanse helps with ADHD is some truly strange ways but at the end of the day it's a fucking miracle#New River Pharmaceuticals developers of lisdexamfetamine I am kissing you on the mouth
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some extremely minor characters from my CRUSH. soapghost fanfic series. matthews gets buried alive not far from where ghost is and o'connelly is the field medic who helps soap get them out again.
#mw2#call of duty#modern warfare#call of duty oc#mw2 oc#cod oc#oc#it literally doesnt come up that con is gay but i do think it's funny how ghost walks around assuming everybody who likes men is attracted#to soap because WHY WOULDNT THEY BE. do you HAVE EYES#and here are 2 people who are like. anyway#matthews is cute she's absolutely useless in the cave in besides talking constantly and holding ghost's hand sometimes#con is useful hehe he impresses soap and looks good in the reports#ghost's report of the cave in would be the most chaotic thing ever considering he was in shock the whole time#it just reads: fucked around and found out unfortunately.#LMAO
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ok i guess im posting my dnd opinions today. alignment as a system is so fickle and debated because the average ttrpg player is not somebody who is interested in philosophical theory, let alone an in-depth discussion of morality, so defining both the good/evil and chaotic/lawful spectrums is fucking difficult because NOBODY here is equipped to answer questions like "what is evil?" let alone "what makes a person Inherently Evil or Inherently Good", and the fact that the average dnd group would need to satisfactorily ANSWER those questions in order to rules-lawyer certain spells/items/abilities is absolutely fucking ridiculous
#and thats not even touching on how ridiculous lawful/chaotic is#like i just use it as a legalist/anarchist scale but some other definitions get really fucking esoteric really quick#the most common one ive seen is lawful means having a personal code you use to make decisions while chaotic means not doing that ig#but now youve defined it as having literally any ideology at all which. everything is ideological all the time always.#like am i lawful for being an anarchist?#its an internal code i follow so by popular definition it would make me lawful right? nvm that the code is a rejection of laws as authority#like it just makes no goddamn sense but thats what people come up with when they dont have the mental frameworks to actually discuss this#and someone notices that legality and morality are attached to 2 different axes even though authoritarian society says theyre the same thing#you get answers like ''well clearly lawful doesnt mean literally actually law-abiding because how could the law be evil?''#its. why the fuck is something so subjective and conceptually advanced still a core mechanic of the worlds most popular ttrpg#it doesnt HELP except for establishing the bare bones of ''your character should have a personality and it should affect their choices''
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Yo! It's ya boi, Guzma.
So I've seen people goin' around and sendin' lovey-dovey letters to their cuties. What's up with that? Dunno but I thought, ya know, why not send one to ya, heh? OK maybe Plum' elbowed me in the sides sayin' I should force myself to be romantic for once. What's up with that?
But ya know. Thought wouldn't leave my mind so here I am, writin' to my sweetie. Hope you'll like it, my li'l Butterfree. Man, ya boi's bad at romance, OK? But I love ya. For reals.
Maybe we could, I dunno, go on a fancy date or some sh- somethin'. In Malie Garden, maybe? Away from the boys for once, just me and ya, yeah? Yeah, man. Sounds perfect to me. I just wanna cuddle with ya, y'know? Have a bit o' peace and quiet alone with my beautiful Beautifly. Is that too much to ask, Arceus?
Sorry, no point complainin' to mythical mons. I just wish we could have a moment, ya know?
OK this is gettin' embarrassing. Imma go train Golisopod for a while, then maybe we can get outta Po Town and do something cool together, yeah?
Ya boi who's bad at romance but hella grateful for ya, Guzma 🪲🖤
real actual images of me when i woke up and opened tumblr to see this a couple hours ago HELP MEEEEEEE
whoever wrote this,,,, you are incredibly good at writing in character voices godDAMN, and also YOU ARE GOING TO KILL ME (/positive)
don't mind me while i just. stare at this. repeatedly. all day. "for reals".......... sobs !!!!!!!!!!
#AND IT WOULD BE SO BUSY ALL THE TIME YOURE SO RIGHT#do u know how chaotic it'd be with a bunch of teens running around getting into shit bc thats like... their whole shteez. fucking shit up !#i feel like im animorphing into a giddy schoolgirl whenever i look at this HFHDSGHSDGJKL im going to COMBUST#he tries SO HARD and he's so bad at it but honestly thats whats so charming fhsdgjkl he TRIES even if he isn't good at being romantic fsdjk#anon u are giving me brainworms FHDSGJKL i feel like i gotta go leap into a snowbank or smth#also this has sparked a couple art/writing ideas in my brain so thank u doubly for that - hopefully i have time to work on smth today :3#AUGHGHGHHH i can't stop looking at this JFDSJKL#anyways thank u again LOL i wasn't sure how i'd feel about ever receiving this sort of thing but fdsjkl this is . so good#i hope your day is MOST excellent and treats you well :D !!!#save#💜so good at being in trouble#dandy.cmd
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KABOOM TIME
Everyone say hi to Nitro!
Nothing changes except Pedro is an explosion maniac
Meaning he only fights using things that go boom
He blew up his right arm several years ago and after he destroyed two prosthetics the same way, the family refused to pay for another one
He found that reasonable and basically decided that it was "one less thing to worry about"
The amount of explosives he carries on him at all times is ridiculous
How has he not blown himself up yet
He came up with his own composition of explosive and it's probably the worst from his stash
~~~
He's learned to do everything with one arm
He's mostly cool with it
Though rarely, he cries out of frustration when faced with a situation in which his handicap is a problem
#Explosive Personality AU#My Friend Pedro#Nitro#he's the most chaotic one so far#and I fucking love him#would you believe if I say that he can still manage to use a rocket launcher#and yes his shoes are asymetrical
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i do love that vash is the Definition of high int, low wis. he puts on the goofiness to get ppl to not pay attention to how absolutely Bonkers skilled he is so ppl just assume he's a dumbass. and like. he IS. in some ways. he is SUCH a dumbass. but he's an incredibly intelligent dumbass. he has layers.
#speculation nation#focusing on the wiki page's bit that says his IQ is higher than most humans#like YES he's a rabid little guy (big guy tbh) all bark no bite least intimidating motherfucker around (until he Gets Serious)#but he's also like. legit super sharp. like Geeze it takes me by surprise anytime i see it#if any1 thinks he's genuinely stupid. Pls. pls. pay attention. he is VERY smart.#he also is the kind of stupid where he would shoot a hole in a jelly donut#listen you can be highly intelligent and highly stupid at the same time. believe me. that is my entire existence.#me projecting onto vash in yet another way re: high int low wis#im a total dumbass & make all sorts of stupid decisions. many just for the fun of it#like how yesterday i sampled the hazelnut extract. despite knowing FULL WELL that sampling the rose and vanilla extracts#made my tongue numb. guess what happened when i tried the hazelnut extract?#if u guessed that it made my tongue numb. ur right!!! i had to go to the sink to rinse out my mouth just like i did with the rose n vanilla#did i know that was going to happen? yes! did i sample it anyways? YES! this is the kind of chaotic dumbass im talking about here#sometimes life is boring and you gotta do what u gotta do to get ur kicks ok.#vash is an immortal guy living his life trying to be underestimated so he doesnt have to get into fights#but pulling out the Big Guns (heh) if it comes down to it. and STILL manages to be skilled enough to keep it non-lethal#the fucking Precision he needs in order to shoot nonlethally with his pinpoint accuracy is Insane#ok im a wolfwood girlie first and foremost but the more i think about Vash the more im drawing hearts around him in my mind#i think. im more in love with trimax vash than tristamp vash is the thing. i love them both but FUCK dude#trimax vash is just. hooooooooooooo boy#just like wolfwood. i prefer trimax wolfwood over tristamp wolfwood. that's just the facts#idk where im going with this. im just drawing hearts in my mind's eye around them Both now. there is no downside
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Well. This is Not Good. Probably. I guess -Remus
#I don’t know what to fucking do I didn’t think this was a situation I’d ever have to deal with and that’s coming from me#The most unpredictable chaotic bastard ever#Like okay would I be a terrible person if I just… do nothing and wait until he naturally stops regressing lol#ooc tags:#remus#middle!roman
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