#they think be sounds like that bc he’s french but no he’s just full of snot

[jeanmrow]

if he does LA TOTALLY kicks his ass, when i was there for 4 days a couple weeks ago it wiped me out for an entire week and a half after the fact

random silly headcanon where jean moreau has spring allergies that’s it that’s the post

[clownniac]

SDV Bachelor/Bachelorette Surname Headcanons

i find it silly that we only really know the surname of like,, 3-4 characters total so i went ahead and assigned everyone their own, because it makes life easier - this is just the bachelors and bachelorettes for now but maybe i'll make another post with everyone else's

minor spoilers for alex's backstory and sam's full name under the cut :)

Bachelors:

Alex Mullner - this one is practically canon bc his grandparents are the Mullner's, but i like to think that whether or not his parents were married he refused to keep his dads surname

Elliot Arthur - i dont have much explanation for this beyond it just Feeling Right, something old and (generally) english

Harvey Lieberman - i saw someone headcanon harvey as jewish, and lieberman means "dear/beloved" so this was another one that just Felt Right

Sam O'Neil - picking a surname for sam was kinda tricky tbh bc it had to flow nicely with samson And the rest of his family's names, but O'Neil means warrior which suits kent and it sounds nice

Sebastian Kang - couple headcanons in this reasoning: his bio dad is half korean And seb is a natural ginger, so Kang bc it means "ginger" in korean

Shane Miller - shane has always just been a purple haired alcoholic version of nick miller to me tbh

Bachelorettes:

Abigail Duval - duval is french for "from the valley" which ties in pierres whole frenchness And the game itself

Emily Murphy - this was another case of finding a name that flowed nicely for multiple characters (Haley)

Haley Murphy - same as above ^^

Leah Reilly - reilly means courageous which i feel she is for taking the risk of being an artist (speaking as an artist shh), and it sounds nice

Maru Taylor - this was mostly because it is Hard to find a surname that flows nicely with the name demetrius

Penny Adams - this will make little to no sense to anyone else but adams has always felt like a ginger name to me, and it works well enough with pam

[egophiliac]

like 70% of my knowledge about twst is because I read all the comics about it you do bc they're hilarious, but can I confirm that Rook's character arc was basically just an 'Applejack -> Rarity hypeman (malicious)' pipeline??????

yep, Rook joined NRC as a full-on Rowdy Boy who wore the same ripped-up jeans and sweatshirt 24/7 and was 99% split ends, until one day Vil convinced him to dress up a bit for a concert and he was like, "oh. hmm. actually, I like this." and swung fully into the other extreme of Fanciest Lad. Rook just...does not do middle grounds.

(tangential, but my personal 100% crack actively-contradicts-canon-but-I-don't-care headcanon is that French doesn't exist at all in Twst. Rook personally just made up a collection of fancy-sounding words that, by complete coincidence, happen to sound exactly like earth-prime French.

"but in the City of Flowers --" no, look, his family is VERY rich and VERY weird, it is not out of character that they paid an entire city of people to throw out a few words of their kid's conlang whenever he visits. it makes SENSE --

this is mostly because I think it would be funny if, after Rook gives someone their special little nickname, he has to sit down and explain to them what it means. which I've actually just decided he does anyway, so never mind.)

[f1-stuff]

Girl dad Carlos please! I miss that fic so much 🥲

Okay. So.

I mustered up the energy to write a little vignette of this AU bc I also miss it and bc I didn't want to leave you two hanging! This is skipping ahead quite a bit to halfway through the season, but I'm still planning on writing and fleshing out that portion. I've just known for a while that this was gonna be an important part of the story and that I could jump into writing it right away!

It will probably be edited and adjusted for when the actual chapter is posted on ao3, but this is the 'rough draft' I guess! (Disclaimer: I know zero French and I haven’t had someone look over that bit yet!)

Anyway, enjoyyyy...

When there’s a knock on his door about two weeks into the summer break, his brain doesn’t compute for a full minute after he’s opened it.

Because why would Charles, his teammate, be here? In Spain? At his apartment? During their summer holiday, when they’re supposed to be ignoring any and all people and things related to F1, recharging their batteries, and remembering there’s more to life than racing cars? He and Charles have barely ever even texted during the summer break, let alone seen one another. So, again, why would Charles be at his front door.

Also, he’s a bit sleep deprived and delirious, so there’s every chance he’s hallucinating this.

“Uh...” he says, rather eloquently.

“Hey,” Charles says. And there’s a tentative smile on his face that Carlos can’t even begin to parse the meaning of. His brain isn’t just one step behind, it’s five steps. “Can...I come in?”

“Oh.” Again. Eloquent, Sainz. “Eh- yeah. Yes. Come in.”

“Sorry to stop by without a warning,” Charles is saying. But Carlos is too busy looking around in barely disguised panic at the absolute trash heap that is his home.

It’s not that he didn’t realize how much of a mess the apartment was before, but he sees it now through Charles’ eyes and feels a little like curling up and dying. There are bowls of half eaten food and dirty dishes piled in and around the sink. Various toys, games, books, and drawings are strewn over almost every surface, along with clothes (mostly socks, so many socks) littering the floor. Boxes and boxes of Lucy’s things that he hasn’t had time to sort through are stacked against the walls and in the corners. One of the only exposed walls by the couch has colorful marker all over it, Ana having done that particular masterpiece when he’d accidentally nodded off during Peppa Pig. (He’d been too tired to even properly get angry about it, which was perhaps a bad precedent to set if he didn’t want a repeat performance.)

It looks like a tornado has swept through his apartment. A tornado named Ana.

Not that Charles is much neater on a good day, and he doesn’t even have a kid as an excuse. But Carlos has a feeling that if this is the current state of his apartment, the state of his own appearance is probably no better. He hasn’t properly showered, shaved, or slept in days, and he doesn’t think he’s looked in the mirror in all that time either. For all he knows, he’s still got remnants of the braids Ana put in his hair yesterday. He certainly can’t remember taking them out...

Charles, on the other hand, looks fresh and groomed and sunkissed - everything Carlos would expect during the summer break.

He smells good, he thinks, unbidden. Then, immediately, Stop it.

Charles takes in the space around them, his eyes eventually settling on Carlos with an amused (and maybe slightly concerned) expression. But just as he’s opening his mouth to speak, there’s the sound of the bathroom door opening down the hall and the smattering of tiny feet running across the floor, before Ana declares in her tiny, yet surprisingly bold voice, “I didn’t have a diarrhea!”

Carlos doesn’t even have enough shame left to be embarrassed by his kid. His first instinct is just relief.

“Stomach virus,” he mumbles to Charles, by way of explanation. Then, to Ana, in Spanish, “That’s great, mi niña! Did you wash your hands?”

“Yeeeees!”

“Are you sure?”

“Uh-huh!”

“Good, because we, eh- we have a guest!”

It’s quiet for a moment, before Ana’s head pokes around the corner slowly. But her face lights up as soon as she sees who it is.

“Cha!” she shouts, but then immediately looks embarrassed by her own show of excitement.

“Coucou, Ana,” Charles says, amused. He kneels down and encourages Ana closer, accepting the tentative hug she gives him.

No matter how much they had bonded last time, it’s still been a while since they’ve seen one another, and some of Ana’s shyness has clearly returned. Still, it’s huge that she’s even initiated a hug, and Carlos feels a telltale twinge in his sternum at the image they both make.

“As-tu été bon pour papa?” Charles asks, cuffing her gently on the chin. Ana grins and nods. “J'ai un cadeau pour toi.”

Charles reaches into a bag that Carlos hadn’t even noticed he’d been carrying until he’d set it down to hug Ana, and he pulls out a pink rectangular thing, that Carlos squints in confusion at for a beat. He realizes what it is simultaneously with Charles’ next words.

“C'est une caméra. Pour que tu prennes des photos de ton papa.”

It’s a pink camera for kids, a unicorn adorning the front where the lens peeks out. Carlos almost rolls his eyes - of course Charles, with his recent photography kick, gifts his kid a camera. But the way Ana’s expression transforms with wonder as Charles demonstrates to her how it works is pretty precious.

Charles hands it over to her and she immediately points it at him. He pulls a silly expression, making her giggle. They both examine the photo, heads bowed close. Ana points it up at Carlos next.

“¡Sonríe, papá!”

He sticks out his tongue and her little finger presses the capture button. The joy on her face as the photo pops up on the screen, tilting it to show them even though it’s upside down, fills Carlos with so much warmth and love that he legitimately almost tears up.

God, he’s so freaking tired.

Ana bounds off to her room to gather her stuffed toys to take a ‘family picture,’ and Charles straightens back up, smile lingering on his cheeks even after Ana has disappeared down the hall.

Carlos wants to kiss him so bad. Becoming a father has turned him into such a sap.

“Ehm,” he clears his throat. “Thank you. That was- a nice gift.”

“No problems.”

“You know, you don’t have to buy her something every time you see her,” he says, humor lacing his words.

“I want to,” Charles insists, simply. They smile awkwardly for an extended beat, listening to the sounds of Ana down the hall in her room, talking to her animals. Charles’ eyes stray to his hair. “You have...something in your hair. Is that a braid-?”

“What are you doing here, Charles?” he asks, choosing to ignore the comment. “I thought you would be in Corsica, or somewhere.”

“I was. But I heard you and Ana had to cancel on the trip to Mallorca and-”

“Heard, how?” Charles looks sheepish, triggering his suspicion. So he repeats it. “Heard, how, Charles?”

“Your mum texted me-” 

He sighs, eyes shutting briefly in frustration. He wishes his mom would just stay out of this whole- thing with Charles. But, clearly, she knew he wouldn’t accept help from anyone else. And that he wouldn’t be able to turn Charles away…

“She didn’t tell me to come,” Charles rushes to say. “She was just worried because you refused to let her stay and help, and that you hadn’t found a sitter, or someone, yet. So I just offered-”

“Charles, please...” He breaks off with another sigh, rubbing his temples to stave off the oncoming headache. But it’s already too late, if the subtle pulsating pain, slowly increasing in intensity, is anything to go by. “You should not have come.”

“Carlos, don’t be stupid,” he scoffs. “Anyway, I am here.” And he supposes that’s true. Nothing can be done about it now. “You look tired.”

He huffs a small laugh, dropping his hands from his temples to meet Charles’ gaze.

“This is what someone looks like when their kid catches a stomach virus and then they catch that same virus from their kid, just when their kid is starting to feel better-”

“Why didn’t you let your mum help-?”

“I’m her dad,” he interrupts, breathing hard. But he softens his voice with his next words. “I can do this on my own. I just wanted to...”

He doesn’t really know how to finish that sentence, though. It sounds stubborn and stupid when he starts to say it out loud. None of this should be about him. It’s about Ana. And if he’d really needed help, he should’ve asked for it. For her.

Charles seems to know that he doesn’t have to say it - that Carlos is already thinking it. So, instead, he just claps a hand to his shoulder and squeezes.

“I think,” he says, “-you should get some rest.”

“Charles-”

“No, I’m serious. Go to your room, Mister Sainz.” A slow grin pulls over his features. And along with the genuine concern in his eyes, it’s almost enough to break through Carlos’ resolve. “You are exhausted. Ana will be fine - I will watch her. Just...rest for a minute. Okay? You don’t look like yourself.”

And he knows that must be true. He knows that he needs a lot more than just a few hours of sleep to feel somewhere close to normal again (a shower would be a good start). But it’s hard to even think of himself when he’s been so worried about Ana for days - researching how to get her fever to die down, trying to get her to drink fluids, watching her fitful face in sleep, his heart in his throat despite how the pediatrician had assured him she’d be fine.

But, then, he’d gotten sick, too. And instead of focusing on his own recovery, he’d had to fit in sessions of retching over the toilet in between caring for his kid and making sure she was properly fed. And the two of them had managed, even if it wasn’t ideal. They’d grown closer, he thought, by virtue of her needing him so much.

He couldn’t keep it together forever, though. Eventually, if he didn’t take a break, he’d fall apart completely.

It takes him a stubborn moment, the urge to argue bubbling up inside despite how glorious resting his head on a pillow sounds. But eventually he nods, releasing a breath he didn’t know he was holding.

“Thank you.”

Charles just looks at him with a mixture of fondness and exasperation. “You are welcome, Carlos. Now, go. You look like you are going to fall over at any moment.”

“I feel like I’m going to fall over at any moment.”

Charles laughs under his breath, pushing Carlos’ shoulder gently to aim him toward the hallway. “Well, fall over into bed, then.”

“I’m going,” he insists, letting his tired limbs and the heavy touch of Charles at his shoulder guide him toward his room.

He can deal with how insane this situation is - Charles showing up here, and what the hell it means that he’d come at all - once he’s had some sleep. For now, he’ll happily take it for granted.

He doesn’t even really remember climbing into bed before the exhaustion takes over, his body surrendering to fatigue now that he knows his kid’s in good hands. Trustworthy hands. Charles’ hands.

He thinks he can hear the faint sounds of their French floating down the hallway. It makes him smile with the last vestiges of energy he has left.

God, he is in so over his head.

----

WIP ask game

Link to fic on ao3 -> (x)

[raapija]

Strollonso headcanons that haunt me:

They got together in 2018, Lance had just turned 20 and Fernando was 37.

Lance was the first person to settle Fernando down as he was previously known as a bit of a playboy.

They had to keep the relationship secret as both of them would be accused of corporate espionage. (especially not a good look on Fernando... remembering spygate) The rules were changed later in 2021 when Fernando signed with Alpine.

During Fernando's time off from F1, they came out and it was a bit of a scandalous affair. The media tried to drag Lance but Fernando went on a full-on campaign to support him so they moved on from it in a few weeks.

Fernando buys little gifts for him all the time and Lance pretends to be annoyed but actually loves it.

They mostly talk in English, but occasionally slip into French which sounds like complete nonsense to everyone else because of their accents. But they understand each other perfectly fine.

They got married in 2023 during the summer break. It was a small wedding with just family and some close friends. Lance's parents wanted a Jewish wedding, Fernando's family a Christian wedding. They ended up with a civil officiate to stop them from fighting.

They have two dogs; a shiba inu named Nyla and a golden retriever named Rósa. They treat them like their own kids and they often travel with them to the races.

Lance will tell you that they're polar opposites in their personality; he is quiet and more reserved, Nando is a chatterbox and slightly insane. Fernando thinks it's the other way around (delusion).

They would want to have a family but both of them are too stubborn to retire and become a home dad, so, it's on hold.

When Lance is around, Fernando is banned from practicing any kind of magic tricks as it makes Lance feel dumb for not figuring them out and Nando refuses to tell him how they work.

They have an ongoing bet on which one of them turns gray first. It's currently almost tied and Lance is worrying he's going to lose. (<- suspects Nando of cheating and dying his hair)

They mainly stay in Canada at Lance's or Switzerland at Fernando's house, but spend at least the minimum time in Monaco for taxes 💅 Also Spain. And thinking about Japan, bc Nando is obsessed with the country.

Every formal function they're invited to, Lance has to be dragged in like a cat refusing to go in a bathtub.

They've done Daytona 24h together, with Lando as their 3rd team mate.

Lance has a bad habit of forgetting jewellery everywhere and losing rings all the time which is why Fernando peppers him with pretty things. It also causes Fernando to wear both their wedding rings to keep Lance's safe. Lance would never forgive himself if he lost it.

Every time Fernando comes back from the karting school, he recites the whole day back to Lance and updates him on all the kids' progress. When they have small competitions, Lance helps as a race director.

Lance has a lot of hockey jerseys and Fernando wears them all the time. Lance is prohibited from touching Fernando's football shirts.

[girlfriendsofthegalaxy]

tuesday again 9/24/2024

you might be wondering “is my dear friend tumblr user girlfriendsofthegalaxy still unemployed?” the answer is yes. take this cat off my hands please i don’t think he’s causing the unemployment but he certainly isn’t helping

listening

via Wendy @dying-suffering-french-stalkers, Huoy Meas' ប្រគល់ក្ដីស្នេហ៍មកខ្ញុំវិញ. figuring out what this incredibly zippy Cambodian rock song is named and what it's about was really difficult bc spotify is a bane upon this earth and won't let you fucking copy-paste and OCR was not working on the Khmer script. i ended up listening to the first couple seconds of each of her songs on apple music, and finally figured out this roughly translates to Give Me Back My Love and is about begging a fuckboy for closure.

via the spotify discover weekly, Night Club's Pretty Girls Do Ugly Things. all Night Club's songs sound the same so if you like one, great news! i had this song on for a full gregorian hour bc, i am only a tiny bit ashamed to say, i was storyboarding a The Man With No Name fancam to this. i think it would go pretty hard.

Smoke you like a cigarette Choke you like a lariat Fatalistic tourniquet Do you want more?

-

reading

thank you mackintosh.

i did not Adore any of these comics from the library. i sort of enjoyed Night of the Ghoul, a one-volume TPB by Scott Snyder and Francesco Francavilla. i think ive blogged about this before but every once in a while i'll get a bee in my bonnet to read some horror comics even though i am a giant baby about horror movies.

Night of the Ghoul is about how you can't save your dad from PTSD but also about a lost horror film and also about the extremely dad behavior of tracking down every scrap of info about an auteur. there's also a monster.

the subtle art changes from present day to the remains of the film to the non-film flashbacks are well done, imo. the cover screams mignola but the inside pages are really fun pulp nonsense. i love a piece of genre writing that rolls around and delights in being a piece of genre writing.

im doing my level best not to get sucked into tiktok but i DO love watching this lady revive antique nail polish and look for dupes for shades from like the 20s. she found an almost exact dupe for a shade produced during wwii which is crazy insane to me!!!

-

watching

The Asphalt Jungle (1950, dir. Huston), it's a very painterly heist noir. i even like Sterling Hayden in one of the more prominent roles, even though i think he generally has the appeal of undercooked dough.

much like Fritz Lang's M, it presents the criminal element of the city as its own class with its own reputation and reference systems. it got in some trouble with the censors for having a VERY clearly laid out heist plan and execution. it's also got the babiest Marilyn Monroe in one of her earliest roles

this was such a gloriously messy movie. everyone is such a fucking mess. this woman only known as Doll is heartbreakingly, head over heels in love with Sterling Hayden's character. she's a little flighty and bumbling and silly, but determined! they're constantly orbiting the gravitational weight of her desire for this man and desire for a real life with this man. and that's just one subplot! she has maybe five minutes total screentime! she should have gotten a supporting actress oscar!!! everyone acted their fucking hearts out and it was so much fun to watch!

-

playing

monument valley is in the netflix games library this month (i don't actually know what their liscencing agreements would even look like, they and the studios they worked with were very tightlipped about that when they were rolling this out three years ago) but i assume it's going to be on the service for a while. i have never played this game, which makes me feel a little bit like a bad gamer. you can tell it's ten years old from some of the color and texture choices, but WOW did literally everyone take inspiration from this game.

this is the platonic ideal of a phone game. i get why everyone went insane about it and there was a brief boom of geometry-based puzzle mobile games. it is MUCH much harder now to get people to pay money to play a game that has a planned endpoint and planned number of levels, so netflix is a good home for it.

i was often frustrated but always delighted. the level below involves making something happening that made me genuinely gasp out loud in glee. well worth the annoyance of downloading the netflix app and scrolling through the poorly labeled and poorly sorted carousel of games.

great retrospective, a bit about how you need to have tiny teams go off and just kind of fuck around and bring weird stuff back, and a lot about how they actually designed the levels

The end result had a pixel-perfect axonometric aesthetic that not only went hard on its references to Dutch master artist and printmaker Maurits Cornelis Escher, but also dug deep into classic video game design, going right back to early arcade machines and 8-bit titles. Each of the ten levels is like a piece of fine furniture, built with invisible dovetail joints and inlaid with marquetry, stuffed with secret compartments and little design flourishes. Gray cites the world of theatre and stage design, as well as graphics, as important keystones in the way the levels were constructed. ‘Ken would always talk about flower arranging, and how you frame a silhouette of a level on the screen,’ he says.

-

making

update on the Phantom Menace fabric: pinked the raw edges and threw it in the laundry again with a very large quantity of vinegar. 50% poly was too high for it to really do anything, which is interesting. it didn’t lessen the seam edge effects either, which is a little annoying bc the seams were so gigantic and that’s a good chunk of fabric to lose. i am going to buy a camp shirt pattern at some point when i have money again but for now it goes in The Box

also! thrifted a pack of o-rings for jars for a dollar and finally put my grains etc in my pretty jars. they’re going to live in the pantry but today they live out on the countertop

[funtheysaid]

IWTV 2x02 Initial Thoughts (Stream Of Consciousness)

- ooh the title card changed! I’ve been wanting to see the Eiffel Tower as a “fang” since season two was announced. WE IN PARIS BABY!

- ayooo three-way (interview) incoming

- Daniel’s “Paris sucks” aka “Paris is where my ex-bf is from and he sucks (dick), but not mine anymore, and no, I’m not bitter abt that, his city just fucking stinks (literally)”

- not two minutes in and Devil’s Minion is already flirting bickering

- ALICE MENTION alice!armand truthers are gon love that shit i just know

- “I’ll tell you what a woman is” That’s my sapphic-coded queen!!! 🕯️ pls S2 give me claudeleine 🕯️

- “Gauche” well, yes.

- Loumand: 🥰🥰 Daniel: 🙄 he‘s so second-hand embarrassed for them I can’t

- I mean, it’s crazy. What? We finish each other’s- I WAS WITH HIM FOR LONGER THAN LESTAT WAS WITH HIM WRITE THAT DOWN WRITE THAT DOWN DANIEL PUT IT ON RECORD WEVE BEEN FUCKING FOR LIKE DOUBLE THE TIME …that’s what i…was….gonna say?

- Louis would be that faux-intellectual hipster who has his own darkroom full of overexposed and blurry, unfocused photos that are his “art” bc he took them on film (affectionate)

- Not claudia calling him out on it in the next scene “let me think I’m deeper than I am” okay honey you do you

- “She’s miserable but she doesn’t want to fuck with your too delusional left bank dilettante vibes” ahh the narrative foils are foiling, I see

- The show: Alice was pregnant, My dumb ass: OMEGAVERSE DEVILS MINION !?!?

- “joyfully joyless” MOOD.

- Claudia looking at Madeleine like “I don’t know if I want to be her or be with her” Dw babe it’s a rite of passage for all of us you’ll figure it out

- “Your French is ugly” 🥹👉👈 weally?

- “the dress for my body” LOOK I know what she meant, but I can’t help it that my mind is perverted

- LMFAO NOT GLORYHOLE PARK

- okay why Loumand playing with my heart “I will never harm you. And I never have” wtf wtf wtf

-Oh no the ole business card trick! we all know that’s Louis’ kryptonite he loves a man with credentials

- i like girls, but why is santiago kinda…

- Woah the Annika scene was really hard to watch which I think was the point but goddamn idk if I’ll be able to rewatch that part

- Estelle is my self-insert. I’m claiming her.

- “You both fucked Lestat!?!” HOW DID THEY KNOW WE WANTED HIM TO SAY THAT!?

- “He tasted of vermouth and annihilation” We both know you have no earthly idea what that man tastes like, Armand. Be so fucking fr right now.

- Did Armand just casually drop that he had a threesome with a father and son? I’m sorry, sir????

- “Now I know what two blood fat cocks slapping hands feel like” When I tell you my spirit left my body

- oh shit here we go. I’m a caged animal and it’s time for my weekly enrichment. give me my loustat.

- there’s a letter !?!? Wait wait I wasn’t ready for something like this wait stop stop please

- “all my love belongs to you. you are its keeper” just take me out back and shoot me at this point

- “it is a thin veil” fucking fuck why was that so romantic??

- the blood tears welling up in Lestat’s eyes I’m-

- “Rebound of my life” and in that moment, he spoke for the people

- WHAT IS HAPPENING???? Jesus Christ, they were talking about Alice and then it cuts to FUCKING ARMAND!?! This is not a drill. Everyone to your stations, this is not a drill.

- “You sold your Dad’s playboy magazines at recess” Hmmm? You’re telling me a “straight” teenage boy sold porno mags instead of keeping them for himself??? Yeah, I call gay on that one

- “she wanted to say yes” you motherfuckers.

- Oh shit Louis is pissy tonight rawr kitty got claws

- Devils minion girlies are thriving, skin glowing, hair silky, breath minty, pillow cold, stomach full, dreams sweet, and by Jove, we fucking deserve it !!!!

- daniel’s shaky “um- gulp” …….guys this is gonna sound crazy but i think there might actually be a god

- ooh the camera/photography being like a divide or barrier between Louis and his present situation. Like he wants to capture the moments, but only as if an onlooker and not a participant… interesting!

- “Who?” will never not be funny

- “Mon ami” in the same episode as “Mon Cher” FUCK ME GENTLY WITH A CHAINSAW

- “Armand for you” nah nah nah i changed my mind, you can do like Leatherface and shove that chainsaw in rough and hard

- Close up on Louis’ conflicted face, fire blazing behind him…. That’s not foreboding in any way. I’m sure they’ll all live happily ever after from now on :D

What a ride! Until next week! 🧛‍♂️🩸

[1-49]

TOURIST GUIDE: The top 7 things you don’t want to be doing when in Paris.

Imagine,

the brightest, most perfect winter’s day imaginable. Crisp, chilly, and beautiful. Warm cafés, busy streets, and gentle breezes ──── stellar architecture, metros, and museums. If anything, Paris is the most magical place on earth, but having Sungchan there makes it even more so.

That being said,

here is a list of the Top 8 things and situations to look out for, & don’t indulge in when you are in Paris if you don’t want to fall in love. A doomed guide for both tourists and locals, eh.

tags: fluff, love, sure it carries its angst though ⁝ fun concept to approach given i wasn’t going to write a fic nor it fits exactly into headcanon, so yeah. he has made me dizzy with his paris photos im sooo sorry. wc. 3k

Fan fact: The French term ‘Coup de foudre’ describes when someone feels completely blown away by someone they have recently met. In literal terms, it means lightning strike. If you have been ‘struck by lightning’ in this way, a common feeling is that you can tell the person everything bc they just get you

Good luck!

THE CRASH

A stunning stranger seated a short distance away from you in a small cafe is always a threat—but this is not just any stunning stranger. As you converse with your friend, he’s also conversing with his group of friends. Passing phones and a camera make their giggles sound like a good time. 

Every chance you get, you glance at him while speaking with your friend because it’s so tempting to do so. Little sparks shoot out the moment the stare is returned; when your gazes meet halfway; when he’s caught, too, for naively trying to get your attention.

When your friend catches on to the fact that you’re looking at what is behind her rather than her.

When she turns around to reinvestigate the situation and notices that he’s staring in your direction, she instantly understands.

When she gives him a smile and turns back to face you, who moved too slowly to stop her.

The stranger which then believes that you both had a conversation about him.

The friend who first exposed you is also the one who is now pushing you to use the restroom; for if he meets you halfway again, chances are good he’s into you too.

Her point is validated when you find yourself in a small hallway, pretending to scroll through your phone, as he moves toward you.

Scents of rich vanilla, chocolate, coffee, and wine fill the dimly lit secluded part of the café, which has burgundy walls. His physique is too large to fit in the narrow hallway. His eyes and smile translate love. His confession is full of tenderness, affection, & promising good times.

THE ‘NO’ PLAN

It’s already outside of your plan to plan the remainder of your day. Order breaks out. Chaos ensues. What was already set in motion was interrupted by him, a tourist named Sungchan. But a Paris show-off won’t be a show-off without a museum, so there goes that theory. 

In any case, a museum or art gallery is a must, so thirty minutes later, you are showing him around one of the many museums. The grand rooms echo with silence as you hope that the angels are praying for you to make it to the end of the tour. It’s simply so overwhelming to be next to such beauty. You can’t stop thinking how much he fits the scene. 

The line of his nose; his lips; the shadows of his collarbones; the wrinkles of his smile; the flow of your hair; the trickle of his laugh—for all of these, he is worthy of a museum.

So when you finally get your hands on the previously ‘passed-around’ camera, an exhibit of blue curiosities rests on his shoulders. Quickly, you take some pictures of him with the Rothko piece. It’s impossible to determine which is more beautiful—him or the artwork. 

There are repercussions for that, as he leads you to allow him to take a picture of you—his ulterior motive, though, to have a picture of you forever. You’ll be with him no matter what, even after he leaves this city and you behind.

JUST TOURISTY THINGS

Time will separate the two of you, just as a river divides Paris, but as you continue to stroll beside the Seine, where musicians sing of hopeless love and painters craft their works in the open, the issue of time is not a priority. If anything, all the time in the world at this moment is yours.

He grabs your hands and spins the two of you around, his hair brushed with sun-kissed shades of cinnamon brown. Claiming he isn’t immune to music, so you can’t be critical and should just follow his example.

But when the spinning becomes too intense and he feels lightheaded, he tries to steady himself by staring into your eyes for longer than he should. Your proximity scares you, but you’re concerned and ask if he’s okay. 

A smile appears on his face as a result of your concern for him, while a heavenly presence is tipping from his eyes as he’s making a promise that he’s good, if not better than ever.

A smile that inspires hope & makes you believe. A smile that undoubtedly had great power to bring you both to this point. He’s beautiful in every sense. Mentality, personalty, appearance.

He’s even surpassing the Eiffel Tower in terms of beauty with ease!

Your captured images, with him as the subject, create the most ideal postcards, and as you’re showing them to him, it’s when a feeling of sad nostalgia envelops you prior to even parting ways with him. You come to the realization that you desire to spend more time with him, not just one day.

But all you get is one day... 

A magic day... that is gradually starting to turn into a night—and as the two of you walk on the fresh-washed gravel paths through the Luxembourg Gardens, the wind becomes clearer and sharper.

Even the bare trees, which you’re used to seeing against the sky, seem to be feeling the warmth of his touch as he insists on pushing and spreading his fingers inside your palm. His vibrance makes even the leafless trees feel less lonely. He takes your hand in such a way that you aren’t even allowed to give him a warning look. Hand in hand, you have no choice but to chase after him.

NO DESTINATION BACK UP

Does it even matter that he doesn’t know the city? 

The ecstasy you are running on is surley telling you that it’s all about getting lost and  discovering yourself in unfamiliar places—and that’s all because of him.

The startled look in this stranger’s eyes as you two nearly cross a street at a red light due to his rushing… 

As he begins to apologize while biting his lower lip, claiming he didn’t mean to. 

His deer-eyes in the headlights are all that you can focus on really. It’s tempting to say, ‘It’s okay,’ but there is something about his apologetic expression that makes you feel as though he’s completely enclosing you in his gaze. 

His eyes are hugging you while he apologizes. It has been a long time since you felt something like that—felt completely safe. Sincerely, and risk-free. He’s a walking green light. So then, it’s a bit sadistic of you to wish for his apology to last longer. 

But how can you not?

When his hand squeezes yours even harder, and he turns all starry eyes while biting his lip in fear?

Someone you would definitely want to try and fit into your pocket, regardless of his height or width.

CRAMPED SPACES

When the cruelness of the night finally reaches your bones, chasing a tiny, romantic restaurant is the only way to soothe the cold.

The warmth of the atmosphere meshes with his gray cardigan, and you find yourself moving more and more into his comfort zone due to the crowded space, where many are seeking refuge for the same reason as you two. 

His rich scent fills the air around you and his knees keep touching yours due to the close proximity. The wine glass dangles in his hand and his lips become more and more affected, picking up a cherry hue.

His collarbones exhibit every movement of his body, and for whatever reason, you feel an insatiable urge to reach for the soft, grey wool and uncover more.

You’re so invested in this delicate area it’s making you feel absolutely irrational. The constant spreading of his hand through his lush hair and pushing it behind is only adding to your obsession. Regardless of how often he does this, the silky hair flies back into his eyes every time.

He has this habit of dipping his small fork into your chocolate mousse, taking a bite, then flirting while he listens to you talk and plays with the fork, letting the sharp tips sink into his soft lips.

The gesture merely begs for your attention, so in order to stay true to yourself, you greet him by clinking glasses with him. But as soon as his glass touches yours, you have to look him in the eyes again and be so sincere... You lose either way.

This gorgeous person’s natural flirtatious charm can’t be escaped. His focus shifting between your lips and eyes as he attentively listens to you is quite possibly the hottest thing about him. 

And although he insists on practising some French words, he continually mispronounces ‘croissants’ and ‘creme brulee’. He got ‘Bonjour’, ‘Bonsoir’, and ‘baguette’ right, which is worthy of notice; and the greatest reward would be a peck on the cheek, which he hasn’t yet received...

The fork remains sunk in his lips. If there’s one dessert that can be described as the ‘most scrumptious’, it’s him.

UNDERGROUND MISHAPS

Running with him in hand is a somewhat exciting experience. You aren’t sure where he got his stamina, but you’re sprinting down the stairs and will have some downtime when you two board the next metro.

When you reach underground platform though, a sea of tourists waits impatiently to go home or explore the outside world.

His hand carefully slides around your waist as you wait, standing side by side, your chests exploding from all the running. Whether it’s to protect you or keep you to himself, the intent is unclear.

And just as you’re about to look up to give him another warning glance, you realize that you’ve already forgotten how many there were. His adorable facial expressions are the reason you never succeed.

Obviously, the wine has increased his energy—his feelings are in his eyes. 

His features quickly and suddenly take on an emotive tone. A line appears between his brows and a hint of melancholy on his face as recognition dawns. Maybe the effects of the end of the day are finally starting to catch up with him.

You realize that he’s a lot of fun—the type of person who always sees the glass half full but who is also, presumably, grounded enough to realize that something is in the way and the glass isn’t quite enough full. Though he’ll eventually have to face it... saying goodbye to you is probably the biggest treat.

His hand is trembling inside yours...

... whether from anger, sadness, or excitement, it can be all of them or then

“Sungchan,”

You barely have time to finish what you started before he pulls you in and gives you a hug. Metros, come and go. People are walking past you, but he freezes this moment.

His coat’s lapels seem kind enough to part away, giving you more personal space and allowing your ear to fall directly on his heart.

His hand falls effortlessly over your head, as soft as a snowflake as he says, “It’d ruin everything if we said anything. Let’s not.” He carasses your hair and then plants a kiss.

A hug so strong that it keeps you safe from the passing of time. 

However, even this beam of sunshine has a heart, and it rains. Not even he has the complete ability to stop time from passing. The earth orbits, and the leaves dissipate.

Though what he can do is, 

he can certainly seize some of the light in the circumstance as he pulls on your hand once more, making the promise of, “Trust me.”

FALLING IN LOVE

There is definitely a sense of a ‘Trust me’ irony in the situation however, about how you won’t fall in love with him.

He seems to be pointing you in the direction of the photo booth at the end of the platform, which he noticed while your bodies were merging together. 

You’re fairly certain that those will be your favourite, worst-ever photos of the two of you, but the only memory you can physically hug, so you decide not to argue.

Naturally, the cubicle is small, but what do you expect from a metro photo booth?

The sweet giant battles his height and shoulders to enter, and when he does, he just hovers above you, looking down. His palms pressed against two different walls, and his neck bent at an awkward angle because you have taken all the ‘what can hardly be called a’ seat. 

Like it is your fault, right?

With a tongue poke to his cheek and raised brows, he’s subtly advising you to do ‘this one thing.’

Like hell, “I’m not sitting in your lap,” you bat your eyelashes at him. 

“It’s too late to back out. Plus, I don’t think there’s any other way to make this work.”

The goofy grin morphs his whole face into what it would be to stand under the sun; his cheeks rise higher the more he shows teeth. He’s so cute. It melts your heart.

Your mouth stays open in shock as you say, “But it is you who wanted this,” before you endearingly defend yourself. “This was your idea.” How very ‘trust me’ of him. In the end, you accept. “Okay, fine,” you sulk while pouting.

Satisfied, he clicks his tongue. You both knew that you would accept; you just wanted to have some fun, didn’t you?

You eventually create room for him to sit, but when it comes time for you to sit, you hesitate. But then you feel his hands dragging your waist down, and the next thing you know, you’re in his lap. He has lost all patience.

You sigh with annoyance, but even you know it is all a front. 

Now hesitant to move, your back remains pressed against his chest, and you’re even halfway there trying to maintain your balance on your feet instead of lounging comfortably in his lap. However, his back hug is particularly effective because it feels like his palm is pressing deeper into your tummy, encouraging you to relax even more into him.

His thighs radiate unnecessary heat, and his warm breath tickles the side of your neck as his chin rests on your shoulder. He teases you, whispering, “You can face me you know, I don’t bite.”

There is an absolute anarchy, there beneath his palm, in your belly. Not the whispering tone!! 

You tilt your head back (ironically, letting it rest where his shoulder and neck meet), gazing at the near ceiling and mentally calculating the number of seconds until you lose your mind.

He rests with you, for a minute, or two… his heart densely kicking in your back, but you swear it’s a peaceful moment. He’s able to magically stop the flow of time, no matter what!

Perhaps outside of the small world that you two inhabit, the metro passes by for the fifth time, and perhaps the waiting area is swept by cleaners once more while your shoes peek out from under the curtain, threatening to blow your cover.

However, time never really stops—especially in this place, the City of Light, Paris, a city that never sleeps.

“Let—um” His voice cracks for the first time before he finally says, “Uh—Let us take those pictures.”

You shut your eyes, allowing the angst of the situation to have its way with you before turning to face him.

His brows appear flat, and the crack between them is even deeper than it used to be. Even his lips are fuller than they used to be. Or could it simply be the face-to-face intimacy that is causing them to appear in such a way?

All this time, you thought it was just a playful lust, an undeniable attraction, when, in fact, what you’re finding is love—love looking straight into your eyes.

You no longer need to hold it within you. You just admit it, completely aware that nothing will change but that it will undoubtedly have some significance because it’s better to let things out than to hold them inside.

“Sungchan,” you pause for a moment, “I don’t want you to leave.”

Like you haven’t already felt them, he takes your hand and puts it over his heart, allowing you to feel the butterflies surging through his chest. Your lips to your eyes is the route he prefers to travel most. “I don’t want to leave either,” he admits voice light and airy.

As you look at him, every time the photo booth camera flashes a bright light, the butterflies burst rhythmically—because of that, and as much at the magic, and at the calculated touch of a girl who, in the past, had learned to trust no one. Yet, here you are, choosing to trust someone you have just met & won’t see again.

Your hands tremble against his cheeks as you gently cup his face and begin your slow, careful inspection. His tense muscles slowly relax under your touch as you run a finger across the peak of his eyebrow.

You feel an influx of emotions as you begin to understand that this person is an angel. You’re tracing every inch of him into your brain—soaking up every star in his eyes and every mole on his face—because an angel like this can never be met twice...

His greatest quality, you think, even in this kind of ‘damned’ situation, is that he can’t stay serious; a smile lights up his face. The only word that adequately expresses how you feel is wanting to ‘devour’ the damned smile that lingers close to your lips. He’s irresistible.

Cute or sexy are terms that are so confusing with him. You aren’t sure to which he’s supposed to be leaning towards. It’s driving you crazy. He simply can not be defined.

And the more he holds you, the more confident he gets. He started off politely, treating you like a paper bird, and then he abruptly stops apologizing. His lashes start to make out slowly with the narrow look he gives you. His thumb glides over your bottom lip. There is only one meaning to it.

Conversely, the photos taken are sitting in the photo outlet. You whisper, “Sungchan,” gesturing to the pictures and apparently indicating that ‘your work here is done.’ 

His firm grip on your jaw, however, fiercely brings your face into his. His winey breath is coating your lips.

“But,” you knit your brows, “our series of pho—”

His index finger stops your lips from moving mid-sentence. “Let’s make another one.”

“You—you’re getting too comfortable in this,” You stagger over what you are saying as his nose brushes against yours, “for-for well, for something that will never happen again.” 

“That’s exactly why I need those photos,” he says, chewing the inside of his cheeks in response to your somewhat insensitive comment.

“And we—And we,” you keep breaking, “We’ve been her—

“Can I kiss you?” He brutally cuts you off.

His sugary lower lip is already pressed against yours. It no longer interests him what you’re saying. It’s a quiet question, but there is some dangerously real intent behind it.

Yes, but can he beg for a kiss?

Sure,

as if he’s breathing in the air that he knows he’ll be missing out on, his lips remain waiting for a sign before they get messy.

His thumb ignites ‘instant fire’ in every pore on your cheek with each precise circle. It’s more like he is consuming you in advance. 

Your thoughts are numb, and your heart is stuck in your throat. You don’t want to forget any part of it all, and you’re bound to in the high you’re experiencing right now... He was right when he advised it to be documented.

The gaping mouths. The tender lip-stroking. The deep, slow breathing. The hot air exchange.

His teeth clenched in pain. The energy he surrounds you with is so intense.

Your “Fuck!”

& Sungchan’s “Please,”

occur simultaneously.

© 𝟭-𝟰𝟵. do not copy, translate, repost, and modify my works.

[reverie-darling]

HEY I SAW UR POST ‼️‼️

Can I know more abt ur hcs on Nodth African James? Its cool asf and I'm interested to know more 💚🍀🎀

HII IM GLAD YOU LIKED ITTT

Soo on my NA!James this is focused on Marocan/Algerian

I feel that his Arabic name would be either "Jasir(ja-sir n it means courageous/bold it's too on the nose tbh but it's pretty)" or "Jad and it means and bear w me on this serious hehehe"

Soo I don't think he's gonna like Kouskus like at all ,it feels like sand in his mouth and it doesn't fill him up and the vegetables get mixed up and he hates chickpeas and and- he can come up with a thousand reasons why he doesn't like it

by Effie makes it every Friday "it's tradition to do so James! deal with it" Soo boy eats noodles every Friday 😭 he'd pout about it

Sirius l o v e s Kouskus and doesn't get why James is so picky and eats it every Friday without fail- even gets second servings Effie is always telling James "look Sirius like it, you're just dramatic"

speaking of food, Sirius was used to your typical croissant and coffee french breakfast,so seeing a whole ass feast for breakfast was a jarring experience

I'm talking boiled eggs , coffee,milk, flatbread,homemade fresh and warm bread (Effie is an early bird and she bakes almost every morning) leben (fermented milk), garlic,olives , olive oil

like Monty eats raw garlic in the morning, Sirius is shocked,but then again that man has the power of horse,maybe that's why

also their coffee is strong and Effie drinks that shit black

James knows Arabic, french and English and some berber,so yeah, Sirius/regulus talking french ain't shit,he can n will keep up

he would listen to ray so muchh I hate him

he owns a djellaba and a burnous, Effie makes him wear them in Yannaer (berber's new year)

Effie does henna to both Sirius and James,but not full palm n fingers maybe just a bit in their pinkies

Effie is amazigh (berber) while Monty would probably be from Shlef or something

he would use the sound "aaaahhh" to express multiple emotions , it's like it's own language

Soo yeah, I don't have much bc I thought of him this morning but I'm sure I'll have more after he marinates in my head

[plaguethewaters]

hey lychee heeyyy if you ever wanna yk talk about the beeduo kids I will. I will Very gladly listen (<- avid listener)

my french hw is looking at me very badly.

ANYWAY i have been having very heavy brainrto about a second beeduo kid her name is Maple and she is absolutely perfect in every single way.

i have.l extensive enderman headcanons about pretty much all of their society and biology - because im sick and dumb in the head mostly, but also because i have a pretty detailed space au with endermen as a race where most of the wordbuilding came from. Then again, in my canon continuation au (wich started with the idea of making a better ending to the dsmp and then spiraled into like two more seasons and twenty to forty more years of story) ranboo is, in fact, a full blooded enderman and also a prince from the end so i kinda needed to get mysself some lore for that too.

Strictly maple specific biology fact include

endermen do not have any gender, but they also do not have any sexes. Unlike humans and other human based hybrids, endermen reproduce entirely asexually.

enderman reproduction is strictly based on the End, because endermen are technically made of End Dirt. There's a small, slightly related specie of enderman that is instead made of Nether Dirt. Ranboo is a little bit of an experiment, because they're made of both. (it was not an experiment on purpose. His older sister accidentally spilled the wrong dirt while he was being made)

This works basically like these: two or more people (more often more, as children are raised communally in hauntings. The only "single parent" household that really exists in the end is the royal family, and that's a whole other can of worms) decide they want a child. They gather around one of the Sacred Birth Places, which is any space that has a decently high density of dragon magic, and then they perform a ritual that i have yet to properly think about to make that baby. The baby is then made from the magic dirt and it'll proceed to grow pretty much like a human child.

The Dirt Baby is made 40% of dragon magic, 10% of Dirt, and 50% of their parent's shared souls.

(in my minecraft wordbuilding, a "soul" is the code a player runs on. For endermen player specifically, their sould is physically made into the enderpearl)

(the endermen that get farmed for the pearls aren't players, mostly. Kinda like the difference between and ape and a human irl)

Now enderian children. They are such fucked up little creatures and i love them very much.

First fact! They Do Not Have Mouths

just like. they don't. just skin down there.

It is mostly a defense mechanism: most predators in the end do not have the same kind of night vision enderman have, and hunt mostly by sound. Which means endermen children are uniquely silent and still most of the time.

The mouth does open with time - it fully opens around the time an enderman is fully matured. My ranboo, for example, still has his mouth kind of attatched by new lmanburg, and gets it fully open by the end of canon

children, not having mouths, cannot actually speak. They communicate mostly by vibrating (a purring kind of sound they produce with a secondary set of vocal cords that sits in their chest, just below their pearl. It can make a purring sound, a static kinda sound, and many many others), gesturing, and flapping of their secondary ears

their two sets of secondary ears are much smaller than the main set and will gradually disappear by the time they're like, 12 (which is also when the mouth is generally open Enough to start making sounds). Think of it like losing baby teeth.

And now, the star of the show (and the end of this post bc it is getting kind of long and i do actually need to study lmao)

BABY MAPLE!!!!

maple happens when Micheal is around thirteen (so think, 9 to 10 years after the end of the serie), and after a lot of things have happened in my regular canon

(For context, in that time period: The main villains (the egg and dream and dream xd) have all, separately, been defeated. Ranboo has been brought back to like, michael has lost his first two lives, the nukes have been launched, the apocalypse has happened for a few years, the dsmp as a political entity has been disbanded and every association to that has been made a bannable offense, our Main Cast beeduo family included has moved to a new, much normaler city, ranboo has discovered he's the long lost prince to the enderian empire and he has got a mother and a sister and he's actually even fucking richer than he was before, benchtrio has gotten a decent new life, michael has started elementary school and made a few friends, wilbur has gotten so much fucking therapy and is gradually trying to mend his relationship with his family. Not necessarily in that order).

At one point they just. decide to have a baby, just because, and michael is SUPER fucking on board with the idea. he loves the thought of a baby sibling, he adores the idea of having a partner iin crime, he's already decided the ways he will corrupt them to his side and use them to get more ice cream after dinner. he's happier about it than his parents tbh and they're really proud of that.

So they go to the end, and poof out baby maple with the usual enderian dark magic. Maple is a biological beeduo mix, and since my tubbo is a dragon hybrid, she's half enderman half dragon.

Given that she's made of end Dirt she's mostly enderman looking and deveopment wise, but she will grow wings at one point and her horns look a lot more like tubbo's than ranboo's.

Her name was given by tommy, because she has a cute little tail that looks like a maple leaf. He absolutely cried when they told him they're calling her maple, and he will deny this to his death.

They raised her pretty gender neutral because of the whole "endermen do not have gender thing" (and also bc in my minecraft world. people do not have gender at all mostly? Like sexes exist for human and human hybrids but there's a much much less strict gender spectrum) - but the second she was aware what gender identity was she fell in love with being a girl, and that was it. She was like, 6, but her opinion never changed much.

She becomes taller than michael by the time she's seven. He is adeguately horrified by that fact. She is still shorter than ranboo tho and it makes him gloat quite a bit.

She's very fem presenting, but she keeps her hair short by endermen tradition. (for enderman, the act of cutting one's hair is considered basic hygene. Not cutting it indicates grief, mourning, or a general tragedy big enough that you can't even take care of yourself. Ranboo, who still didn't remember this but did it by instincts, stopped cutting his hair after doomsday. Even decades post canon he keeps it super fucking long, out of the respect for the Goddess of Death that allowed his revival) (and also he thinks he looks relly fucking pretty with long hair) (he is right)

i have more thoughts but it Is 6 (six) pm so i am stopping. Good lick and very much thank you if you actually read my whole rambling lmao

[imjustavenuxwithaboomerang]

random kaz headcanons cause s2 kaz owns my heart

he can have full blown conversations in spanish (or french cause of the parapluie scene in mighty med) but for some reason, can't recognize that he's not speaking english

^it takes chase playing back a recording from his hard drive for him to realize

^then he'll playfully make fun of chase (for funsies) for having a hard drive

he really likes dying his hair and it either looks terrible and he'll cover it up or it will look amazing and people fall in love (he 100% had frosted tips once in his life and immediately regretted it)

^he covers all of the bad dye jobs with black dye and it shocks everyone when they find out that his supposedly natural hair color isn't actually natural

he can do a backflip (he just gives that vibe okay??)

he's actually a great cook but he's messy and doesn't want to use the elite force compound's kitchen because he's too used to his kitchen's layout back at home

he likes having people sit in his lap (like not in a sexual way, just like in general, it's comforting)

^there will be times when the elite force members will just sit on him (either cause they didn't notice or think they'll get a reaction out of him) and he won't even flinch, he'll just sit there, scrolling on his phone or having a conversation

he 100% makes "that's what she/he said jokes" (im right!! this is so right it's basically canon)

he owns thousands of hoodies but only wears the same 4-5

he wears vans (you can't convince me otherwise)

he had a klepto phase as a kid (literally in canon he steals pens a lot so im basically right)

he used to have a true crime podcast but made himself too scared to sleep so he stopped

^he's thinking of starting it up again now that he's less jumpy

he 100% just jumps and/or latches onto people for the fun of it

^chase will just be at his work station and suddenly there's a kaz hanging on his back. oliver will try to make a sandwich, and suddenly there's a kaz now attached to his torso and sandwich ingredients on the floor

getting dressed to go see movies was one of his favorite things as a kid (like how people wore pink for barbie and suits for the gru movie)

he can sleep standing up and even though the rats also technically sleep standing up it still freaks them out

^it also freaks skylar out (even though she's an alien)

he used to make fun of chase for owning sound-proof headphones (bc he wasn't using them for music) but after stealing chase's when he was out one day, he now owns a pair and loves them very dearly

he hates documentaries with a passion and will dramatically turn one off if someone dares watching one (even if he's in a different room)

okay it's getting lengthy so im gonna stop here

[whatsaudreythinkingabout]

randomly assorted scott pilgrim headcanons!

(mostly involving roxy)

(some involving future scenarios)

envy & roxy have the same weak spot behind their knee. they are also girlfriends. this is the most important headcanon & i have a whole separate thing that goes more in-detail on this but this is all you need to know

kim is a huge tegan & sara fan (she’s from canada and definitely bi so it makes sense). she likes their earlier albums (since it takes place in the mid-2000s it would probably be around the time so jealous and/or the con were released), and when heartthrob and lytd came out she tried to pretend she hated the new pop sound but she secretly loves it.

lynette lost her arm while performing a show with tcad that brought the house down. literally. the frequency of the vibrations emitted from their performance was powerful enough to cause a minor earthquake, and while the band was trying to escape the venue, her arm was crushed by falling debris.

envy is bilingual, having grown up in montreal, and speaks both english and french.

roxy & matthew are best friends. however, when they first joined the league, they absolutely could not stand each other. each thought the other was totally obnoxious, and they would constantly bicker and fight with each other. they also definitely got into the pirates vs ninjas argument on more than one occasion. eventually, after a sparring match gone wrong, they bonded over the fact that ramona had used them in some form while they were dating her (matt for his powers, roxy for her sexuality), as well as their love of too much black eye makeup, and they’ve been inseperable ever since. they definitely have a partners-in-crime dynamic, and their friendship is 80% snark and 20% chaotic dumbass.

later on, lucas gets roped into their friendship as well, and they form an unstoppable friend trio. roxy sees him as a cool older brother type. matt has such a huge repressed crush on him you don’t even KNOW and roxy teases him about it literally all the time

after the events of the series, they form a 3-piece punk band called roxy & the hooligans (title derived from a book i read when i was a kid). roxy is the lead singer and bassist (she learned how to play out of pure spite just to flex on scott & todd), matt is lead guitarist & backup vocalist, and lucas is the drummer. matt is also their special effects/pyrotechnics guy.

they’re also housemates for a little while, then matt & lucas start dating and roxy moves in with envy when they start dating. of course, this does not affect their friendship, and they have double dates frequently.

after she starts dating envy, roxy also forms another best friend group with julie powers and lisa miller. at first envy is worried roxy and julie won’t get along bc she thinks julie will be jealous of roxy for “stealing” envy’s attention, but they end up bonding over their shared hatred of scott.

lisa and roxy are identical twins who were separated at birth. (this was bc they’re both portrayed by mae whitman but i might retcon this one, idk)

meanwhile, roxy & todd actually, genuinely HATE each other. todd was always kind of a bully to her when she was in the league & she hates how much he gets on her nerves. to make up for it she loves to rub in his face how much he fumbled the bag with envy

envy was genuinely hurt by lynette going behind her back with todd bc she thought they were friends. lynette is pretty indifferent about it.

after the events of the comic, ramona starts a support group for all the women affected by gideon.

envy is a natural redhead, but started dyeing it blonde once she had her big rockstar makeover, and often alternates between the two shades.

(tentative, still figuring out whether i wanna make this a full headcanon) roxy is a natural brunette, but dyed (and maybe also cut) her hair after ramona broke up with her, as the gays™ are known to do. she also used to wear her hair in space buns instead of pigtails (whaat nooo this totally wasn’t inspired by spinel what are you talking about)

roxy doesn’t really care about the spelling of her name; she spells it with a “y” and with an “ie.” (alternate idea: she spelled it with an ie before the breakup and with a y after the breakup?)

barbie movies exist in this canon, and envy recorded “hope has wings” for the magic of pegasus when she was a teen (back when she was still going by natalie) but she’s super embarrassed about it. she has literally done everything in her power to hide it, but as soon as her friends find out about it they refuse to let her live it down.

likewise, finally out of pe exists in this verse except now it’s just part of envy’s early discography, which she wrote before she formed TCAD.

technically the events of the story happened at the same time the early barbie movies & brie’s album came out but we can afford to move the timelines around a lil bit just for funsies

kim created the maid costume herself, & she’s a closet geek/cosplayer. later on she & envy end up bonding over their secret nerdy sides.

she’s also a closet theatre kid

roxy is the kind of person that tries to put on a tough front to avoid getting hurt & being seen as weak but if you give her even one (1) single tiny bit of affection she will instantly fall apart (especially if you happen to be a pretty girl)

when gideon was messing with everybody’s memories, he ended up causing a rift in the universe that caused the timeline to branch into two separate realities (the books and the movie, respectively). when he was defeated, they merged into one again, but the characters now have memories from both realities. it’s a little confusing

wallace ends up getting together with stephen later on (maybe? they seem like they’d have a fun dynamic), and they’re happy together, but once wallace finds out about matt & lucas dating he’s so fucking salty about it bc HE HAD A CHANCE WITH LUCAS LEE THIS WHOLE TIME

ramona eventually becomes the lead singer of shatterband. scott & kim decide the two-person lineup isn’t working out for them; they need a frontman, someone with charisma to tie them all together. then they hear a voice coming from the bedroom. they go to investigate and find ramona singing softly to herself. she’s a bit hesitant to join at first bc she’s not super confident about singing in front of others, but they manage to convince her by telling her how she could totally one-up envy.

matthew is a proud, unabashed theatre kid. roxy is the kind of person who acts like she absolutely despises theatre kids (even tho she’s really just as melodramatic as matt but won’t admit it) until karaoke night rolls around & she suddenly knows all the songs

roxy is a mixed media artist & is proficient in quite a few different techniques, but her specialty is graffiti. since being a ninja takes a lot of discipline & she often got criticized for letting her emotions get the better of her, it gives her an outlet to be more uninhibited.

the twins are pretty aloof & don’t really talk to anyone else besides themselves; they just kinda do their own thing while viewing everyone else with either mutual respect or smug superiority. gideon doesn’t really give a shit about the other league members, but the twins are his “favorites” (relatively speaking) just bc of how efficient & powerful they are

scott & ramona end up in sort of a semi-throuple with kim. no one really knows what their exact situation is; whether they’re an open relationship, friends with benefits, or just officially all dating each other, but wherever they are, kim is usually also there, & they don’t question it. (honestly the more i think about it the more i like the idea of polyamorous ramona just bc there’s so many characters i ship her with)

maybe wallace also gets involved. just for funsies

in the future, roxy ends up taking knives on as her ninja protégé. as a mentor, she’s pretty no-nonsense bc she wants her to be able to reach her full potential, but she also tries to keep her temper in check & not be overly harsh on her just bc of what she went through in her own training (at the ninja academy she was looked down upon for her half-ninja status & constantly belittled for being too soft, undisciplined, emotional, etc. which caused her to push herself to the brink of total physical and mental exhaustion to prove them wrong, & that led to her parents pulling her out bc they were worried she was gonna push herself so hard it would kill her, & that whole situation is the main source of most of her insecurities). at first she’s put off by how relentlessly upbeat knives is, but then she sees how eager she is to make her proud & roxy can’t help but see a bit of herself in her. over time she comes to see her as sort of a kid sister, especially when knives eventually comes out to her, though she refuses to admit how much of a soft spot she actually has for her. she knows knives can handle herself, but she’s also grown more than a little protective of her (and scott is terrified of her for this reason)

i have a LOT of other HCs regarding specific backstories/relationship dynamics/etc that i might post later if i get the motivation for it but these are just some of my shorter ones

[kikisfuneralservice]

LEE TAEMIN BF HEADCANONS

always wanted to know what lee taemin is like as a boyfriend? your questions have been answered…

includes nsfw content‼️

*ALL CONTENT IS PURELY FICTIONAL AND NON-ASSOCIATIVE WITH ANY OF SHINEE OR SM ENTERTAINMENT- PURELY FOR ENTERTAINMENT PURPOSES!*

FLUFF:

likes waking you up early

for no reason too he's just your alarm clock cuz he’s loud as hell in the morning

clashing shit around n bein loud

he takes longer than you to get ready

you are ready to leave in sweatpants and he’s got a full outfit on and you’re like come the fuck on

wants to buy you expensive things so you two can be the stylish couple instead of the trashman and the hot guy

you like being the trashman tho so it’s ok

swings your hand that he’s holding while u two are walking n starts skipping n shit cuz he thinks it’s cute while you’re like :| what

ties your shoes, buttons up your coat, puts on your scarf, etc. loves taking care of you

loves laying his head on yours when yall are on the bus or train

he also likes sharing earbuds with u!! he just does it to be physically closer to u tho lol

writes gross poems out in the notes app in his phone for you and they physically make you ill because of how cheesy they are

*some odd interpretative dance in the middle of the street* “this represents my love for you”

you: 🧍 “take it back pls”

u both are just very chaotic

copies people that he sees on the street bc life imitates art

tries to say profound things but they end up coming out sounding like tongue twister

sends up just telling a story from ten years ago that you’ve already heard before

but you’d never tell him that

likes to take the scenic route even though it’s far longer because he loves taking photos

speaking of which, he has more than 10k photos in his camera roll, half of them being of the sky and the other half being memes from twitter

is a big fan of trashy reality tv—sometimes more than you

i hc him as a huge love island fan

he likes ordering you both large coffees from starbucks and sitting down on the couch and gossip about the love island contestants

always somehow roots for the couple that gets eliminated the fastest

is very passionate about voting on reality television shows

tries to imitate their accents (he is convinced he could be Australian)

also is someone who yells at the tv, but also stops it every five seconds to talk about what’s going on in depth bc no one else would understand

loves doing karaoke so u guys have karaoke nights

he buys the goddamn microphones too

he just loves doing the things he loves the most with you

as long as he’s with you :)

SMUT:

loves touching u more than anything else 

loves getting on his knees to look up at you while you run ur fingers through his hair

loves loves loves praising u but only if u reciprocate it back

just very very sensual and does everything slow just to take it in

french kissing/??!?!?!?!?

yeah

puts your hands everywhere on him

rlly likes handjobs???

he just wants ur hands on him

he loves getting off on the thought of u

loves when u sit on him facing each other just bc he wants to see ur pretty face as u get off on him

mutual masturbation!!!!!

does that thing and pulls u closer to him by ur legs

likes when ur on top of him just cuzzzz

it’s the best seat in the house

he likes seeing u in control thats all it makes him feel loved and wanted

loves putting ur foreheads together so he can feel ur breathing against his lips as u slowly fuk him👀

his eyes are way too much to handle

slightly hooded and pupils dilated so much it’s like he just got back from the eye doctor

“lemme show u what i've always wanted to do to u”

wants to know he’s making you feel good

---

how do we feel about these taemin hcs that have been sitting in my wips folder for actually about a year?? i’m sorry ;-; i wanted to upload a little something before i go ia this weekend, and i thought i’d upload the taemin hcs! if you are interested in more content, please make sure to see my pinned post!

please make sure to rest well this weekend and heal: i will be here or on my twitter for anyone who would like to reach out.

TAGLIST FOR THE SPECIAL PEEPS (lmk if you’d like to be a part of this to get notifs on my new posts!): @keyloml​, @jjongolese​, @taeminscheesetouch​, @dayskz​, @jonghyuns-husband​, @taeminscult1​

[oumaheroes]

I'm gonna send you a few, lol. But if you hate the ideas you can just delete them, np. #1: Matt's old iPod from 2008 is full of Nickelback music and Alfred tries to tease him for it. But Matt isn't ashamed bc Nickelback is great and y'all are haters.

I'm not sure this counts as fluff, Anon, but I hope you enjoy a real quick drabble of some bros being bros

Characters: America, Canada

.....................

‘Move.’

‘What?’

‘Move.’

‘Jeez, snippy much,’ Alfred sat up from where he was sprawled along the entire length of Matthew’s sofa and instead twisted to prop his feet on the coffee table, ‘Where are your manners, boy?’

‘Dad doesn’t sound like that.’

‘And who said that was supposed to be the old grump?’

‘The terrible English accent you just did?’

‘Damn. Guess my inner dick head voice is English.’

Matthew sighed and placed the bowl of popcorn on the coffee table, where it stayed for merely a second before Alfred grabbed it up, ‘That’s not funny.’

‘Then why’d you smile?’

‘I didn’t smile.’

‘Aw, got gas then?’

Matthew somehow refrained from punching his brother on the arm and flopped heavily down next to him.

‘Woah woah woah, watch the landing there, Rocky.’

Matthew grabbed a handful of popcorn and popped a kernel into his mouth, ‘So what’d you pick next?’

‘The Martian.’

Matthew groaned.

‘Hey! What’s wrong with that?’

‘It’s terrible.’

‘No it isn’t? What’s wrong with you.’

‘Al, it’s a shit story.’

Alfred gave an exaggerated gasp and held a hand to his chest, ‘It is an awesome story, number one. Number two, people who have an iPod full of Nickelback don’t get an opinion on what’s shit and what’s not.’

‘How do you know what’s on my iPod?’

‘You left it at mine and I looked.’

Matthew blinked, ‘When? I don’t even use an iPod anymore.’

‘I dunno like... ten years ago?’

Matthew was thrown, ‘Wha... what’s that got to do with anything?’

‘You’ve got shit taste.’

Alfred gave him a sympathetic look and clucked his tongue, ‘I know it’s hard to accept, don’t worry. We can talk about something else.’

‘There’s nothing wrong with Nickleback.’

'So you still listen to them, then?'

'And?'

‘They’ve done some great songs.’

‘Sure they have.’

‘What are you, a walking naughties meme?’

Alfred shovelled a handful of popcorn into his mouth and dug around in the sofa cushions for the remote, ‘They’re bad.’

‘Tell me why they’re bad.’

‘They’re corny.’

‘And how are they corny?’

‘I dunno, they just are.’

‘You’re corny.’

‘Yeah.’ Alfred gave him a dazzling grin, ‘And even I think they’re bad.’

Matthew huffed and grabbed another handful of popcorn from the bowl, ‘Well, I like them.’

‘And I like The Martian.’ Alfred flicked a popcorn at his cheek, ‘Now shut up and turn turn the lights off.’

‘I’m picking the next one.’

‘If you can stay awake.’

‘I’m staying awake just to make you watch some French surrealism.’

‘Ugh.’

[photmath]

I'd trust you more Emily to be apart of the recovery team than whoever in PSG. I'm sure the staff is great but I don't trust the institution behind them to put his mental and physical health first especially with all these constant transfer/selling rumors

OKAY. BECAUSE I DO HAVE A LOT TO SAY ABOUT THE PHYSICAL HEALTH ASPECT of this, so i'm going to sit here and spill it.

I HATE HATE HATE PSG'S RECOVERY TEAM. LIKE FULL SLANDER AHEAD TOWARDS THEM IDC. Just a straight, unrestrained piece of my thoughts and their physiotherapist team and LACK of professionalism.

TW: mentions of Hakimi, not of what is going on with him, but player-injury and performance wise. Kimpembe's ruptured Achilles ):

so not sure how many people know this but I’m a third-year undergrad student studying to be a physical therapist (PT) right. I’m American, so the logistics of this get lost between America and Europe--and even between the states of America because everything is so different when it comes to injuries and recoveries, etc. I recently found out that even like a team like PSG, doesn't have “athletic trainers” which is what we — Americans — call on-the-sideline medical people. they have “physiotherapists.” which in America, sounds similar to “physical therapist” but turns out it isn’t the same thing at all, although they're similar. Athletic trainers are the first on the scene, they're who you see that first treat an injured player (in America), and PTs are more behind the scenes. They're more in charge of the recovery process after an injury/problem, while the ATs do the first initial findings and just make sure the injured player gets off the field in a safe manner.

So my assumption, is that a physiotherapist (in anywhere other than America) is in charge of both on-the-sidelines examinations and off-the-pitch recovery?? I could be entirely wrong or maybe some are in charge while others aren't. In America, that is simply not how we do it, so I've just been trying to make connections ever since the World Cup. But if you know or anyone for that matter knows, please let me know because I am so intrigued.

Anyways, all that to say, Hakimi and Kimpembe's ongoing injuries should never had happened. It was known that after Morocco played their last match against France, that Hakimi was battling an ongoing thigh injury. He had been battling it throughout the WC. So when he returns to PSG, he plays for approx. 11min against Strasbourg on Dec. 28--which okay, not bad. Semi-green flag, although no one knows how injured/uninjured this thigh really is.

The real problem starts when he comes back to play the FULL 90min on Jan 1. Which, raised major alarms in my head, because this a hamstring we're talking about. Hakimi is known to be an explosive player, so it's bound to be strained whenever they sprint. Anyway, he's suspended for the next match bc of yellow card accumulation, so he doesn't play again until Jan. 15 (FIFTEEN!!!) for 34 min--which, okay, not bad. I'll let this one slide. It's a little over a 15-20min range and literally fourteen days have gone by without him playing a high-intensity 90-min match. So I'll say it's a yellow flag.

And then we hit the match against Riyadh and Hakimi plays for 64 min which okay, that isn't all that much bad but it's still kind of a lot. We've gone from 11min to 90min(!) to 34min and now 64min. Like seriously what are we doing here? Then, we have that 7-0 game in the French Cup that he plays for 31 min, which okay, we've dwindled down more than half of the minutes he previously played. Just I mean, the roller coaster is riding itself here. It's a lot, it's chaotic, not consistent. And consistency is what WE WANT. It shouldn't be chaotic at all.

He then plays FOUR matches for NINETY MIN EACH the next couple of weeks, BUT then only plays for 25min the game before Bayern. I think this was around the time he had reinjured his thigh at some point during training, so it tracks (and makes sense why he's having problems). Then, Hakimi is obviously subbed off during half time because of that thigh against Bayern. AND LITERALLY WHAT DID THEY EXPECT. i mean, i was so baffled at that. Just straight chaos at best there. We haven't seen him since that Feb 14 matchup [but won't be surprised to see him in the starting lineup against Bayern now that Mukiele is injured].

Kimpembe's history IS EVEN WORSE. LIKE HIS IS SO MUCH MORE WORSE. He hadn't played since November 2022! And even then it was on and off between his Achillies and hamstring in September-October 2022. So he misses the World Cup, doesn't play again until Feb 11 2023 against Monaco, wooo!! I think everyone did like a loud standing ovation when he entered at the 80th min, which wasn't bad. I liked that. Green flag!

But then Bayern match on Feb 14, Kimpembe is the one who replaces Hakimi at the 46th minute so you know okay, this situation certainly isn't ideal for Kimpembe, but PSG is just out of options here and it's Bayern. So, everyone is just forced into this bad position.

An Achillies injury, any kind of pain or minor sprain to it, is just complete ASS. It's awful, debilitating, I mean you simply cannot continue unless you want to endure major pain and cause further damage. An Achillies is like the major tendon that holds the whole backside of the leg together. I mean part of the ankle, bottom of the foot, and both calf muscles, are all being connected to this damn Achilles. So it's kind of important. Think, like the ACL of the knee.

And then Kimpembe plays the FULL 90 MINUTES in a match five days later. Red flag. I mean, c'mon now, it's a lot. I mean I wish I could say I was surprised that in his next match after that 90min game, he goes and ruptures his Achilles, but I wasn't. There was no gradual re-entrance of him. This is a defender we're talking about. Sprints and break-aways are going to happen. You have a guy like him with an injury like that play 10min-44min-90min back to back like that?? I get it, injuries were tight, defense was awful, the youngsters were playing horrible. But holy hell, why did we have to sacrifice our guy like that?

Kimpembe's injury should have never happened. It was too soon of a full-on return, not at all gradual, just completely awful management of both PSG's physiotherapist and medical staff--and fuck it, coaching staff. They obviously have the education so my opinion is just unvalid, but I don't understand how they were completely fine with letting Kimpembe play for so long in such short time. It wasn't like he was playing in mock 90-min scrimmages and following an explosive player (ex. Mbappe) around. They don't that. Scrimmages are no where near the real game anyway.

So yeah, that was a lot, but god only knows how upset I am about Kimpembe's situation and PSG's lack of efficiency. And God, do not get me started on Mukiele's CURRENT Achilles tendon pain going on or Nuno Mendes iffy return as well.

[rainypebble07]

heyy so i have a story!! about my life!! BASICALLY when i started at my school four years ago there was a guy i hated so badly because he beat me in a poetry competition and i was SO PISSED!! and the hatred continued until six-eight months ago because he always got higher grades than me in maths and science BUT i would beat him in english, french, history etc. up until the start of the last school year it was like a one sided rivalry but then he found out about it and it was like reciprocated and we would each get our best friends to ask each other what grades we got and whenever i beat him in something he looked hella mad it was really funny. not to sound full of myself i'm so sorry but we were the two "smartest" in the class. like we got the best grades. (we are actually both idiots but). anyway. so. about six-eight months back, i noticed that. unfortunately. he is extremely fine. which is extremely upsetting. but SUDDENLY i had the biggest bloody crush on him it's so embarrassing. and THEN a month after this realisation MY FRIENDS STARTED SHIPPING US. and they won't shut up about it. so NATURALLY i vowed to never ever tell them i actually do like him bcs they would NEVER SHUT UP!!! so they still don't know- but THIS GUY we keep making eye contact in class and it's so embarrassing but like is it a coincidence?? is it because i'm like starting too much and it's weird?? or like what. what is happening. i hate everything about it. THATS MY STORY sorry it's so long man i just. have a lot of feelings. and since i can't tell my irl friends i won't shut up to my moots :)

This is so enemies to lovers that even I'm rooting for you. Sounds like some sort of high school rom-com, and usually I'm not a rom-com fan, but I'm kinda here for it. Unfortunately, it sounds like you're both so smart that the sheer power of you two working together would simply obliterate us all with a giant wave of knowledge.

If he's a nice guy, I'd go for it, but since you're enemies, I feel like he's a meanie, and you should definitely not date a meanie. Idk man, I'm aro/ace so I'm the worst at love advice. If anything, make peace with him first and then see what happens.

Also, of course you're the smartest kid in your class. Like, I'm not even surprised.

Also hahaha you used the word 'bloody'! Hahahaha Europeans! I wish Americans used 'bloody', I think it'd solve all our problems.