#they may or may not work side by side in the future...
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theinfinitedivides · 3 days ago
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wi papa look a thing there for me. awa.
prefacing this with a PSA that i'm going to try and keep short but basically regardless of anything i say here let me make it known that i do believe he should apologize. whether or not he's still actively saying that word in 2024 it is something he's used in the past even if he isn't performing said play anymore/saying things like that so flippantly. granted if he does apologize there's always going to be a section of fandom that's like 'he only apologized bc he got caught' yes?????????? that's what always happens????????? lbr you're not going to get on IG and announce you killed your ex two decades ago and you'll be turning yourself in when there's an entire true crime community in the depths of the internet who will dig up the cold case + the suspiciously convenient alibi anyway without you lifting a finger. politicians who get called out for blackface in college do not go around telling people they did blackface in college. celebrities who were homophobic on this hellsite in high school back in the early 10s before they realized they were gay are not going to let you know what their handle was. this is how the world works.
that being said i must confess i caught wind of the stirrings of this a bit early bc during the clusterfuck that was the Jam vs Zamasian RPF poll (i did not go in the notes. rancid ass shit) someone had taken a screenshot of a reblog made as a 'gotcha' to Zamasian voters by implying that they were anti-Black for voting for a ship featuring an actor that said the n-word in a play he hasn't performed for several decades since, with a short taped example that the general public was not going to know how to find unless they were on a mission. i poked around, saw a couple hints here and there that implied that the clip actually existed, marked that down for future ref and went about my business. disappointing? sure. run of the mill especially among people his age in the industry from that time period who are perceived to benefit from white privilege? absolutely. the former bird identified app dragging all of this back into the light (including the interview with Chris Rock. which i have not seen though there's no way it was within the last few years for AMC to still hire Eric if they had seen it. correct me if i'm wrong pls) is unexpected but tracks for the fandom on there.
generally i don't believe in cancelling someone for things they said or did more than ten years ago if they are no longer the same person they were back then. i don't believe Jacob or Assad or any one of the staff of color who may have been working behind the scenes would have agreed to continue interacting with Eric if he had the same attitude as he did when he first wrote and performed the play. i don't believe his Black comedian niece would continue to talk about him and share photos with him if he was calling her or the Black side of her family the n-word. i am willing to give the 'Eric Bogosian n-word' reply tweet he reportedly made before deleting it shortly after the brief benefit of the doubt bc it was 1. supposedly under someone else's tweet talking about the play incident and 2. i cannot count how many times i have accidently commented/almost posted something on here or YouTube or Reddit or ao3 bc i was on mobile and once the keyboard's open the app/browser flips the fuck out and puts the search bar and the comment box too close together. now if his ass shows up and shows out and stands ten toes down while he's currently on time-out or doesn't address any of this we're dealing with a different story. if more examples of him acting like this come out i'll drop him faster than you can call the election it will be that serious.
anyway for now i'm choosing to keep an eye on this while acknowledging that us Black folks do have the right to be upset and pissed as fuck. we deal with enough racism/microaggressions in fandom spaces as it is we definitely don't need new ones, and we don't need them from the past career choice of the main cast of a show a lot of us enjoy. amen
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oopsabird · 2 days ago
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it may seem like an odd niche but whenever i catch myself in despair these days, whenever i think the world has gone to places we will never reel it back from, i think about peregrine falcons.
more specifically, i make myself go read again andy johnson's cornell birds article about peregrines at taughannock. it describes how the diligent decades-long efforts of conservationists working for a future they might never see with their own eyes brought the peregrine falcon back from the absolute brink of extinction in north america, through the lens of their recent re-appearance in an ancestral breeding ground from which they had previously disappeared over fifty years ago:
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On June 9, 2020, the first of the young falcons leapt from the ledge, tak­ing unsteady but successful flight across the gorge and alighting back on the cliff wall below the nest. The others hesi­tantly followed suit later that day. After fledging, the young would return to the nest ledge to roost at night, hunkering back into their familiar sanctuary after long days of exploration and learning. The venturing young birds soon discov­ered a dead hemlock trunk that reached out almost horizontally into the gorge, affording an expansive view from which to rest and preen. As luck would have it, this newfound real estate was on my side of the gorge, jutting out just below my vantage point. As one of the fledglings took flight from the nest ledge, I watched it glide below eye-level straight toward me, crossing the creek far below, and swooping up to land on the near snag, backlit and radi­ant. The adults’ slaty plumage was dusty and worn by this point in the season, but the juvenile seen up close sported buff-colored banding and scalloping on its fresh new feathers, and even a little tuft of down still on its head. It turned on the perch, adjusting its clumsy-taloned grasp and beating its wings to regain tentative balance. While the young bird was still finding its footing, it was every inch a Peregrine Falcon. By August, the gorge was quiet once again. The falcon family had departed on migration, streaks of white guano beneath the empty ledge the only sign left of their return. Months later, deep in the winter of 2021 and well before the first signs of a new spring, two svelte adult peregrines returned to the gorge and began their rituals anew, flying in unison, reorienting to the sensation of shale underfoot, and undertaking the serious work of growing their numbers, a few hard-shelled eggs at a time. As of this printing in late summer 2021, Taughannock’s wild Peregrine Falcons have embarked on their next half-century with a resounding affir­mation of past progress. This year they successfully fledged another four young.
To watch young falcons emerge from the mouth of Taughannock two years in a row, toward new gorges yet to be found, was thanks to a far-reaching and defiant vision. The decades-long recovery—a bold experiment to reel a species back from the brink of extinction with our own hands—was characterized by the uncompromising tenacity of a few peo­ple who had faith in the impossible, and a commitment to ends that might not be realized in the span of a human lifetime.
In February of 2019, at age 91, Dr. Tom Cade passed away, perhaps in the same moment that wild Peregrine Falcons first canvassed Taughannock gorge for nesting. He certainly would have loved to see Peregrine Falcons here in Taughannock, further culmination of a life’s work—a new line of peregrines completing a homecoming of their own accord, and a fully fledged testament to the long span of tireless work poured into recovering their forebears.
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scourgeofmyownbrain · 2 days ago
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The Man, the Myth, the Legend, it's Every Version of Soundwave Across the Multiverse! Fucking look at all of them, all 14 of them. It's a Soundwave Height Chart! Yay!
Quick Disclaimer, if any of the images look weird, it's because I had to stitch a few separate images together to create a full body shot of the character.
Here are links to my Bumblebee Chart, my Optimus Chart, my Megatron Chart, and my Shockwave Chart. Please go gawk at how many Optimus designs there are, sweet fuck, there are so many. For future reference, all these charts will be filed under my "Transformers Height Charts" tag and my "aka the adventures of a..." tag.
Explanations and Sources below the cut, because I have always have words to say.
TFA V1 - 6 feet 5 inches (Animated has no actual numbers, but the lovely @phoenix-inanis has provided a frankly astounding resource with their own calculations for the heights of all the TFA characters. Go look at it, it's wonderful -> https://phoenix-inanis.notion.site/TFA-Height-Chart-f6ad2960ca8c4c5b859ee4958723aaa4?pvs=4.)
Unicron Trilogy Cybertron - ~13 feet (TFWiki, for the uneducated, the Unicron Trilogy has given each of its 3 seasons separate names and 3 separate art styles. This is the design used in Cybertron (S3) though he only shows up in Cybertron. This bitch was so hard to get a full body shot of, he was always standing off to the side or standing behind someone)
Earthspark - ~15 feet (No actual source for ES, but using a barn door to get Bumblebee's height, then Optimus's, then Megatron's height, I was able to make a guess at Soundwave's. Soundwave comes up to about Megatron's chin; the screenshot I found has the two fighting, so it might be a little off, but I'm confident this is pretty close. Also, this might be the shortest of universe to date; I am consistantly finding these iterations to be some of the shortest out of all of them. It may look like the UT has it beat but in S1 everyone is much taller than they are later. No, I don't know why.)
TFA V2 - 17 feet 7 inches (Once again, phoenix-inanis did a fuck ton of work, go look at it, it's wonderful -> https://phoenix-inanis.notion.site/TFA-Height-Chart-f6ad2960ca8c4c5b859ee4958723aaa4?pvs=4)
Gen 1 - ~18 feet (TFWiki. I do not have anything else to say)
Netflix Cybertron Trilogy - ~18 feet (I have no source for this, other than assuming that because this design is identical to Gen 1, they are the same height. It's all I got so it's what I'm using)
Knight/Capel-Verse - ~18 feet (No source, and he never stands next to anyone I can measure him against, but because the TFOne director has said that this movie is both canon to the LA movies and its own separate canon, I am assuming the height I figured out for TFOne applies to this universe as well. Capel directed the ROTB movie if you're wondering why his name is there)
One - ~18 feet (No source, I got this number by comparing him to Shockwave who I compared to Optimus. Now, I am aware of the TFO heights listed on the wiki, but I reject those numbers on principle. A: Those numbers are sourced from the Walmart Promotional AR Experience that came out before the movie. B: There are three decimal points, and that number does not convert into a whole number in meters (which is originally what I thought was weird about it). C: The director has said that this movie is both canon to the LA movies and its own separate canon, so I have elected to use the few given heights we have from KCV and worked from there. My Optimus post has slightly more context if you want it)
Cyberverse - 19 feet 3 inches (This comes from a screenshot of this video which has the Cyberverse height chart everyone uses, though the quality of the screenshot is iffy.)
Bayverse - ~22 feet (Okay, so this is from the wiki, but it comes from a concept design for the second movie that never got used, so I went to find my own number. And in the third movie, I was able to compare Soundwave to Megatron and I got a the same number as the first unused number... Kinda backwards but okay)
Aligned Cont. WF/FOC/TFP/RID15 V1&2 - 26 feet 2 inches (I originally got this number from Fandom, but I can't for the life of me find the page with the info. Fandom has like 6 different pages for the same character, it's so frustrating. Also- Freakishly tall universe there is no reason for them to be this tall)
Not Pictured: Bayverse Satellite Soundwave - I do not know how big he is and I can not compare him to anyone who I do know. I am sorry satellite Soundwave fans, he evades me with his stupid floating in space all alone bullshit.
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teamdilf · 3 hours ago
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Veilguard's Ending and a Story Turned Folktale
Veilguard ending spoilers after the cut.
Given that the Solavellan ending was heavily inspired by the story of Loki and his love, Sigyn, I've been thinking about how their story would shift as the centuries go on. The inquisitor is widely viewed as a deity in Southern Thedas, whether or not they accept the designation, the same as Solas, who is viewed as a god despite his refusal.
Now, Rook leaves the Throne Room with a tale of the Herald of Andraste - one of the most powerful people in Southern Thedas, leaving the waking world forever to live by the side of an ancient elven god. It's a romantic story, and I think after any initial backlash (whether it's because people perceive Lavellan as abandoning her duty to the south or because of the wrong Solas has done to the world), it will come to be viewed in a romantic sense.
Some may see Lavellan's decision as a sacrifice, but my Lavellan, Iris, would be furious with anyone who saw it that way. She'd planned this for years, recognizing that any future she'd have with Solas could not be in Thedas, but in the Fade. She had a bag packed, and said her goodbyes to Dorian, who is the only person she told definitively about her plan (though I assume Morrigan figured it out during their time working together). This was what she wanted - what she always wanted. She didn't want to be a politician; she saw her duty when the gods were freed, but once they were slain, believed those she put in charge of her duties while she was away would tend to them more capably once it became known that she was gone, never to return.
She made her choice out of love, but she could also see that Solas needed her more than anyone in Thedas. Long ago, she swore to herself that she would never allow him to die alone, and so she's promised him an eternal life by his side.
So, I can definitely see it becoming a folk tale or mythological tale - though both Iris and Solas would be terribly irritated if they discovered people were viewing their love story with a religious lens.
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heat---lightning · 1 day ago
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Orc Story pt 6
Many days have past since you've been taken to the Orc stronghold. You've been trepidatious with you interactions around camp but you have grown to see these Orcs from as-of-yet-to-be-determined far off land, as nothing more than a peoples trying to resettle their lives after a tragedy.
Your captor, the old Orc, who you've learned goes by the title Cothor the Angler. From questioning carefully as to avoid offense around the encampment you learn that he and his family were once fisherman who sailed the coasts and deep rivers. This clue along with the architecture of what looked like upturned hulls on some the buildings, gives you the idea that these Orcs may have sailed here from across the see.
You've been kept in Cothor's lodgings since that first night. He treats you well and you wonder of his future intentions with you, but as of now you feel almost relaxed.
Your second day here you rested most of the day, sleeping off the long journey as well as the vigorous sexual encounter you had with the old Orc Cothor. He's showed no particular interest in repeat copulation, you wonder if it's due to his age, his obligations to his clan, or hesitation to bed a human repeatedly.
Either way, you can help but feel the urge again, you spend your nights lying next to him every night, nestled in his big arms, face pressed against his big chest, breathing in his musky armpits. It gets to you, you can't help but feel some way about it. You decide to ask him tonight to lay with you again.
After the camp had died down and the meals had been finished, Cothor began settling him self down for the night. He removed his various garments of animal skin and leathers and was head towards his own private bath which he had built himself. It reminded you of a natural spring, it must have been one of the first things built here given the comparative extravagence of the design and completeness of the structure.
You stop him before he can reach his destination, he's puzzled. "Please, let me bathe you tonight." You say in more of the tone of a question than a statement. The old Orc thinks for a moment and agrees. He stands aside and motions you towards his bath.
You begin disrobing as he sets himself down in the hot water, you follow suit and set yourself down next to him.
You begin washing his body, your hands getting to touch and caress every inch of him from his large biceps, his hairy chest, big belly, thick thighs, and pleasantly ample back side which you spread wide to his bewilderment and amusement.
"What business of yours do you have back there?" He chuckled. "Curiosty" you replied as you unhand his cheeks.
No matter how well you clean him, the inescapable scent of an Orcs musk clings to his skin, it's something you don't mind and in fact actively find attractive.
You move on to the front and take time care to wash his heafty sack and penis in a way in which you hope elicits arousal. Your hopes become a reality as his member slowly begins to raise.
Cothor looks to you and smiles "were your intentions tonight always to get me into this state?" You simply nod and continue fondling the old Orc "Very well! By all means continue!" He says in a satisfied tone.
You work your hands up and down his shaft while occasionally paying attention to his heavy testicles. He's leaning back with eyes closed, enjoying the stimulation. You carry on with this a for a while before your own curiosity and personal depravity get the better and you and you stop to give in order in a tone you never thought yourself capable of making "Stand up. Turn yourself around." You say as sternly as possible. His eyes open and he meets your eye to stare at you for moment before wordlessly doing as told.
There before is Cothor's ass, big, round, firm and slightly hairy. You reach one hand around him to the front, he's so large you come close to being un able to, you firmly grasp his shaft in one hand and begin moving your hand back and forth. Your other hands runs itself up his thigh and onto his ass cheek, where you begin to spread it as much as you can one handedly.
The light is dim, the only source being the candles nearby but you can make out the sight of his hole. You start you adventurous endeavor nose first, you can't help it, his scent draws you in. Your bury your nose between his cheeks as you hear him chuckle to himself "I've not had this experience since I was a young man!"
You take that as good sign as any to go further. You move your mouth over his hole and slowly, nervously, stick the tip of your tongue against the skin.
Your senses overwhelmed, your lust fully controlling you, you drop an pretense of nervousness now and begin kissing and licking Cothor's asshole as if you were making out with him, you push and prod and try working your tongue inside of him but the old Orc's too tight for just your tongue.
With your one free hand you begin wriggling your index finger inside of while trying your best to keep your mouth there aswell, you pay careful attention to any sign or indication to stop, but all you can here from the old Orc are soft, quiet moans of pleasure.
You eventually work one finger in enough to make room for your tongue to explore his hole. His moans grow more audible and dripping with lust
You pump his cock more vigorously now, your tongue buried deep in his asshole as far as you can, you feel him shifting his hips and tensing up, you know his about to cum.
You work his cock over as well as you can and try sticking your finger in again with your tongue, you're working hard for his completion, which happens with a loud roar and a bucking of the hips as he sprays cum all over the floor.
Through heavy breaths he turns around and stares you down with an ominous, predatory look of lust in his eyes. "Now for my turn"
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visspellbook · 23 hours ago
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May I introduce y’all to my TDP Future AU?
This AU follows the draggang as they get older and go through all their milestones and the story of their children’s lives! This is currently still a work in progress and I’m working on more characters designs + stories but let’s start with the Rayllum kiddo’s!!
Sarai ~Jr~
Sarai is Rayla and Callum’s first born, she’s their spunky, quick witted and adventurous daughter. She’s an explosive mix of both of her parents but to their delight and annoyance at times. She was named after, Callum’s late mother. Sarai is more of a fighter than a mage but she finds magic interesting and wants to see how she can incorporate it into her sighting style. She was born connected to the moon arcanum and has learned the ocean arcanum.
Aydrin
Aydrin is Rayla and Callum’s youngest child, unlike his sister he’s a lot more reserved and quite; mainly because Aydrin tends to be non-verbal in spaces where he isn’t with his family, he prefers to talk through sign language as it’s less stressful for him. Aydrin loves to visit Runaan and Ethari and has picked up his creative side from his father and grandpa. He loves weapon smithing and designing armor and other weaponry. Aydrin was born connected to the moon arcanum, he has yet to learn any others.
Thank you for reading about these sillies, if you have any questions please feel free to ask, I’d love to answer them!
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tlatollotl · 1 day ago
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The frustrating thing is that my research is specifically on non-instrumental power, sometimes known as associational power. It is the power of the masses to band together and work together towards a common goal without having a clear leader(s). It is a bottom-up direction of power that can and has overthrown the mantle of tyranny, righted injustices, and established better conditions for the people. What I witnessed last night was our country unable to come together to stop an abuser of instrumental power. In fact, Trump seems to have gained support as a result of his flagrant declarations of future abuse. If Vance pushes Trump to enact Project 2025, things are going to become a lot worse for everyone. And this time, Trump will have the legislature and Supreme Court on his side. Not only might many of us not live long enough to see another election, we may not see another election again as the nation embraces MAGA authoritarianism.
My mental health while trying to work a full time job and complete a dissertation has not been great these past couple of months. And last night's election results had not helped. How can I care about archaeology when our civil rights and the very lives of my fellow brothers and sisters are on the line? I'm so angry and so upset and just want it all to end
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technically-human · 18 days ago
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Charles vs Charles
@i-am-as-normal-as-you-are has once again commissioned me for the Reverse Verse, and this is only part 1, so expect more comics soon!
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platoapproved · 3 months ago
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iwtv ships + book quotes
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turtleblogatlast · 1 year ago
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You think Future Leo, Future Hypno, and Future Warren ever give each other that look of “oof accidentally had a hand in starting the apocalypse lmao” Solidarity?
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rosecentaur1916 · 1 day ago
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TW: Death and Suicide @rosencatholic Number one: I'M AMERICAN. Number two: Shit did happen!
Wake up, Princess and smell the coffee!
There have been countless women who have died since the overturning of Roe v. Wade because they can't get treatment for legit reasons other than traditional abortion that can't get a Dilation and Curettage (D&C) due to pregnancy complications and their doctors being afraid of persecution. There have been countless women who died because they had to go outside of their home state due to the over turn of Roe v Wade. Babies and death are NOT punishments! Babies are blessings so before you spew that bullshit. There have been countless deaths and suicides because of harassment, homophobia and transphobia thanks to that man. A trans man I followed back in 2022 on tiktok committed suicide because of all of the transphobia he was experiencing. His family didn't even respect his pronouns or his chosen name. There have been countless deaths of black people due to rampant police intimidation and bullying which got *worse* under your emperor with no clothes. Like oh... I don't know: George Floyd and Breonna Taylor plus countless other people of color! May they rest in Power! These are just *some* of the things that happened that I can think of off the top of my head. Sources: Mama Doctor Jones is not only a influencer. She is a board certified OBGYN originally from Texas and a mother of four:
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Milo: Along with showing you Milo (He's on the right hand side) you'll see a cause he was working towards and it got rejected:
A memorial video for Milo because he took his own life:
All the black people who have died from police violence as of 2020:
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A brief history of black deaths due to police imputiny:
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13th about the 13th amendment and how it effects black folks, black men more disproportionately than white folks
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So these are just *some* of the people that were effected by your emperor with no clothes. This is not *all* of them. I wouldn't be able to get all of the names and groups of people he has harmed. There is blood on 72,560,841 peoples hands for the lives we're going to lose in the next 4 years. I am LGBTQIA+, I was assigned female at birth. I am a part of the 67,878,826 who voted for Harris. I am a champion for the poor, marginalized, sick, and those who can not speak or fight for themselves. I fight for my child and his future in this world. That they may grow up in one that is loving and compassionate and won't hurt them or spurn them for their loving heart. I didn't even mention the effects that all of this will have on the poor! And I'm part of that demographic! We'll lose crucial health care protections because he wants to recall Obamacare. We'll get less aid to be able to feed our children. Children who are just like yours or the ones that aren't yours that you hold dear. I don't wanna hear your bullshit about "well you shouldn't have had them if..." Put a cork in it. You lost the right to say that when you supported and cheered the overturning of Roe v Wade. Then the children! I didn't mention the children. Children are going to be effected because you know he's not going to do anything with gun control. I support the second amendment, but *not* when it could get my child killed! You care more about the child I could carry in my womb than the one that sits in a classroom every day! How can you call yourself "pro-life" when you won't protect the lives of people that are already around you? But you'll protect a patch of cells that has a small chance of becoming a child. Did you know that 10 to 20% of known pregnancies end in miscarriage? Did you know that number is likely higher due to unknown pregnancies? Not all sacks of cells become babies. According to the NIH a babies brain doesn't start working until the end of the second trimester? (Source: https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/books/NBK234146/) If my father can be called "brain dead" (He died from a motorcycle accident where he was severely shaken and developed what is called Diffuse Axonal Injury and was declared brain dead by the hospital before we pulled the plug) and that's why he's no longer a living person, than a baby is not a living person before their brain starts to work. The body and heart aren't a person, their brain is. But that patch of cells is more important that my living, breathing, learning and loving kid? The one who loves to draw and paint? The one who loves to build things out of cardboard. That loves Five Nights at Freddy's and Gravity falls and Owl House? The one that cuddles me still, even as big as they are? The one that still insists he sleeps with me at night even though they should stay in their own bed? My child who could get killed by a school shooter because "You'll have my gun when you pry it from my cold dead fingers." OH! And I'm also a single mother and left an ABUSIVE relationship that your emperor in no clothes wants to shove me back into. No way. I will not go back. I will not take my child back to a bad environment because of your so called want for a traditional family system. All that does is perpetuate abuse. I have lived experience. MY life and the life of MY child are lives that are going to be affected and all you care about is the price of milk and bread. How do you sleep at night? Before you answer, that's rhetorical. Watch and educate yourself *before* you reply to this. If you don't watch, and watch *completely* I will not reply. You're not worth my time. Sit with yourself and your vote for a better price at the gas pump that was more important than peoples lives. For "less immigrants" that are *people* just like you. That have families and loved ones just like you. Sit with the fact that you condemned people for your own convenience.
Don’t understand the dramatics. People, we already had Trump for four years and nothing happened to you. You’re fine, it’s not the end of the world. Stop scrolling through social media and turn off liberal media channels. Go get some fresh air.
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runawaymarbles · 1 year ago
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at this point i am simply uninterested in any opinion on a hot-button political topic that treats human beings as a mass of meaningless hypotheticals
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portraitperpetuity · 2 months ago
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My characters, Gerlach and Otto Wilder.
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satans-knitwear · 2 years ago
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Same fool, different day ✨
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fettery-fetterie · 3 months ago
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I'm just kinda thinking over what could it been had things gone just. Just every so slightly better
Had some fundamentals been challenged further
Had the right words be spoken
Had they didn't go all in
It's just so sad, because I ultimately do see them working on the right scenarios, but they're all just...fantasy, a fleeting dream, the unreachable
Oughhhh I love them so much. They're so doomed
#perceptive little crow#this is about teopeka btw#i just listened to something good can work and it was like 'man. this would've been the ideal'#because YES i do believe the first phase of their relationship was full of hope for the future for both ends#peka just found himself on a new world that seemed detached from the previous. he could start anew#tbh tho teo simply followed out of pity and a bit of hopelessness. I wouldn't be surprised if her life was just kinda shaking a couple days-#before she met peka. and after seeing what he was capable of she kinda just....relaxed. knowing it may go well after all#it was a gamble she took. but damn did it pay off. and she gets to enjoy the benefits for a fair amount too#then The Incident happened#then a new department that was the opposite of what she advocate for formed on the company she wanted to create#then she started being pushed more and more on administrative/executive roles and was basically out of the field#then she felt disconnected of her world. her passion. her people#no place to go to no shoulder to land on. she wasn't alone she just....was a deeply lonely woman at the end#sorry. im not even sure if this actually fits the direction I'd like her to go to on my au/fanfic. but ig it fits#anyways. maybe had stuff gone differently she would've enjoyed the benefits all the way through#she maybe could've had both sides of the cake#who knows#it's just kinda interesting to think about the gambles she took went it came to hlev/peka. both on moments of desperation/loneliness#both the same weird ass guy that she saw at first and went 'what the fuck is his deal'#both just...so endearing she can't help but love them#maybe she needs them as much as they need her#maybe any and all their relationships never were meant to last#but that's kinda dooming it further and honestly I'd like to see a happy ending (where i get to be with my crush x3!!!!!!)#so I'll leave one side to rot and the other to bloom. easy.#sorry im rambling too much now. night night
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dredshirtroberts · 7 months ago
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finally tackled the absolute mountain of laundry in various states of cleanliness around my room. now all of it is sorted and put into its respective zones of "away".
#98% of my room being clean with visible floorspace is just finally handling the laundry#i am ashamed and embarrassed that i always have so much dirty laundry#eventually i'll get back to the point i was at when i was the coach of laundry where i'll have like a week's worth of shit to get done#and not a backlog of several months#eventually#and i will be working on not feeling so much shame about the state of my laundry#i don't *like* that i do it but there's nothing inherently immoral about it like the voice of my mother that shouts in my brain thinks#the put away laundry plus the effort i've been making to Make My Bed before sitting in it has helped me feel more settled in the space#so that's good#when i am not as concerned about blocking the various registers in my room i will be in business#(mattress on the floor only fits in one specific corner right by the intake)#(output register is awkwardly directly in the middle of the opposite side of the room which makes arranging the furniture where i'd like it#an interesting endeavor that i'm not super excited in attempting to orchestrate in the future)#i know where i'd *like* things to go#whether or not that'll actually be feasible is another story#also i think i'm going to have to just go through my clothes with the mindset of actually getting rid of things#i threw out a couple pairs of socks because they were worn so thin i'm not sure mending would have fixed the holes#like that that point i'm making a whole new sock and you know what i could do instead? not do that#i also have a lot of Baggage Items i haven't quite gotten around to divesting myself of#(as in the items of clothing have a lot of emotional baggage tied to them that i may or may not be using to negative effect on myself)#lots of old shit lots of things that don't fit lots of things i don't even like actually#but it was free or nearly so and i've just held onto it because free#only a few things are kept because i like wearing them and the texture is nice#so we'll just. go through some stuff and eventually i'll get to the point that even if *all* of my clothes are dirty and on the floor#it doesn't take up my WHOLE goddamn room#that said this has in fact been a problem my whole life and so i don't imagine it's going to be quick or easy to fix lol
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