#they make me insane in the head unfortunately

[lambilegs]

your best friends older sister!sevika fanfic had me gnawing at the bars of my enclosure. love the way you write her as a mean teasing flirt ☺️ may i suggest roommate!sevika who does everything she can to get reader worked up such as bringing home girls to purposefully fuck them loud as fuck to make reader jealous 🙂‍↕️ hehe

roommate!sevika headcanons

note to anon: OMGGGG thank you so much bae!! and right? I feel like if she found someone who got on her nerves, she'd enjoy being the rudest flirt alive, hehe. ALSO, YES, I LOVE THIS IDEA SOOOO MUCH. took me a while to write it out, but I hope you enjoy!! <33 contains: sfw and nsfw content (minors + ageless blogs dni), reader receiving oral and strap, porn-watching, kinda voyeuristic (reader gets horny from sevika having sex with other girls), throat-grabbing, smoking, reader's body is referred to with the terms "pussy," "g-spot" and "clit"

roommate!sevika who doesn't really bother talking to you at first, just keeping to herself. she's not a fan of sharing her living space with people, but money's tight, and this is what she can afford right now. she's not interested in friendship, or some sort of everlasting bond to form between the two of you. she just wants to live in amicable peace, and have her space to herself.

and so, the two of you barely talk. you try, at first, but it becomes clear three days in that she's utterly uninterested. which, you can't lie, is a pretty huge disappointment, considering that the prospect of living with an incredibly hot and stoic butch was one that had you thrilled initially. but, unfortunately, she seems anything but truly interested in any sort of connection with you.

roommate!sevika who remains in her bedroom most of the time, working on one contraption or the other, or watching videos on her laptop.

or gaming. because, yes, she games, and she does try her best to keep quiet, she really does. but, the idiots she plays with have her occasionally shouting, cursing loudly as they cause her team to lose yet again.

every now and then, she'll hang out in the living room, watching TV, but that's usually reserved to when you're not home, or locked up in your own bedroom. when you come out to cook in the kitchen, or sit on the love seat so that you can fold laundry, she'll usually linger for a few minutes, carefully observing, before standing up to head back to her bedroom.

it's not like she hates you or anything. you're pretty okay -- nice to her and not sloppy and disgusting like some of the other roommates she's had before. you even share the food you cook with her, and have always been cooperative about splitting chores with her. so, in sevika's books, you're not a person who she's keen on disliking, and she actually feels pretty damn lucky for having found your ad.

roommate!sevika who does nothing to quell the sexual frustration you've had for months due to the serious dry spell that's been plaguing you. walls are thin, and you can hear the loud ass girl she's brought home, moaning and whining as sevika's bed frame rocks against the wall. every now and then, her noises are met with sevika's hushed grunts and filthy words of, "tell me, who's a good girl?"

you twist and turn in bed, rolling over to glare at your phone. it's 2:03AM -- how does she still have the energy to be fucking at this time? you're exhausted, irritated, and insanely horny from what you're hearing. because horribly enough, this girl doesn't sound like she's faking -- no, she's truly enjoying herself. sevika is just that good of a lay, it seems. and that piece of knowledge has your pussy beginning to dampen, soaking through your panties.

if you shut your eyes, and drift into the hazy world of dream land, you can pretend that it's you and her making those noises. that she's the one fucking you right now. god, just the thought of that notion has your clit aching.

but, it also has you feeling a strike of insecurity. because the truth is, that probably won't be you and sevika anytime soon. she doesn't even give you the time of day. you don't know what it is you've done to her, but she avoids you like the plague, never returning any of your offers of kindness or bonding. and it's beginning to sting really bad. if she can canoodle with a stranger (and, yeah, you're painfully aware it's a stranger, since her text said, "Hey. I met a girl at the bar tonight, is it okay if I bring her over?") well enough to have sex with her that very night, why can she barely spare you attention as her roommate?

the thought is a cold wash over your horniness, and all it leaves is a bitter taste on your tongue.

roommate!sevika who's giving you the most bewildered stare as you shake the soaked thong of the girl she brought home last night, yelling about how you're convinced that said girl stole one of your underwear after this one got ruined.

"how would you even know that?" sevika snickers, eyeing you in disbelief. "are you that anal?"

"my drawer was half open, sevika! and I never leave it like that because I'd knock into it on my way in otherwise!" you snap, your eyes wide and glossy with anger. sevika's honestly a bit unnerved by the sight -- she's never seen you this pissed, but jesus, she thought it'd take more than a singular, flimsy piece of fabric to get you to this state.

"it's just one pair," she deadpans. "I'm sorry serena -- or, selena, I don't know -- took it, but it's not that big of a big deal."

"maybe not for you, but it is for me! listen, I don't care if you don't know the names of the girls you bring here, or anything about them -- but, just make sure they're not a thieving dumbass, okay? is that enough for you?"

sevika's jaw shifts, irritation beginning to sizzle in her from the condescension layering your words. you're talking to her like she's a fucking child, tone taking on a faux sense of guidance.

"okay, listen, I'm sorry she took your underwear, okay? I'll buy you a new pair if you're that bent out of shape over it. but, you don't need to be such a piss baby about it."

your head flinches back, eyes sharpening in clear anger. sevika feels a twinge of guilt. she knows she fucked up, since ensuring the girl from last night didn't do anything out of line was her responsibility. but, your anger has her own defenses kicking in automatically, and she's equal measures embarrassed and angered at being spoken to this way.

"I have every right to be pissed if you're gonna be stupid about the people you bring in our apartment."

well, that manages to snap her out of it. "because I could just magically anticipate that she'd steal your shit? I get it, she did something shitty, but I couldn't have known that. I've got lots of skills, but that's not one of them."

you scoff, the noise loud and unabashed. "oh, trust me, you made a great display of your skills last night. not that you seem to fucking spare any of that attention to someone unless you're gonna get a good lay out of it."

sevika immediately freezes at that, her brain running into overdrive. your tone has shifted into something biting, but lowered with what seems like -- frustration? frustration not just at that girl, but at sevika herself. and if you're frustrated about sevika possessing an attentiveness that she spares only to certain people, then that must mean--

sevika snickers softly. oh, yeah, you've definitely given her an opening in this argument. "what, you jealous?"

immediately, you're spluttering, broken words and half-gasps flinging from your mouth, sentences barely strung together. it only heightens sevika's newfound delight in having found something to hold above your head.

"you are, aren't you? what, haven't had a good fuck lately? need me to get one of my boys to come over and take care of you?"

sevika can see the way you work your teeth behind your pursed lips, and it only causes her flame of amusement to burn brighter.

"first of all, I'm not fucking pitiful, okay? I can handle getting fucked. second of all, I'm not into guys, something you'd know if you even spoke to me for two fucking seconds."

sevika's eyes widen at that. this interaction definitely had her suspecting it, but to hear you confirm it only sends another wave of satisfaction, mingled with surprise, through her. so, you're gay and bitter over having no attention, and specifically not hers? you're making it too easy.

"so, what, you're into me?" she asks, her voice twisted with snark. "been wanting me this whole time? mad I'm not giving you attention?"

she knows it's risky to be goading her own roommate like this, flirting and teasing. but, she can't help it -- not when your mouth is finally shut and she knows she has something on you.

she stalks up to you slowly, using her height to her advantage as she dips her head down, staring at you with a piercing smirk. "well?"

your eyes are wide, blinking rapidly like a pretty little butterfly. they flicker down to her mouth, and sevika feels something stir in her gut at the sight. she's always been neutral about you, but there's something undeniably attractive about seeing you like this -- seething, wanting, in need of someone to take care of you. as her gaze roves over your features, she finds herself struck for the first time that you're, frankly, pretty good-looking.

but, then, you draw in a sharp breath, and sevika reels back in surprise when you hiss, "no."

she's left baffled as you whirl on your heel, stomping to your room, muttering out, "perverted jackass."

sevika chuckles at that. perverted jackass, huh?

roommate!sevika whose noises are so bothersome that you cover your ears, gritting your teeth at the rattling-headboard noises that are running through the apartment for the fifth fucking time in these past two weeks. how sevika manages to get this many girls in her bed is beyond your human capabilities. all you know is that it was never this often in the past. no, this -- this is fucking personal. you can feel it in the way she shoots you a haughty smirk the next morning, and how she encourages the people she's with to moan louder, move back faster. it's gotten to the point where you can even hear the fucking skin smacks.

it makes you utterly enraged. and impossibly soaked. but, for your own sense of justice and determination, you refuse to get off to the noises. in fact, everytime she continues her habit of asking you politely if she can bring someone over, you ensure to respond in as chipper a tone as possible. you don't want her thinking she's having an impact on you. you want to convey the self-image of being unbothered, unfazed and completely okay with every little dig she's attempting with you.

what makes you snap is when you're on your way to work one morning, and from where she's seated on the couch, lip bitten in frustration as she does a crossword puzzle like a fucking nerd, she says, "enjoyed the show last night? I can pick someone else up tonight. thought I'd ask in case you need to charge your vibrator in advance."

stay calm. stay calm. don't attack her. don't sit on her face.

"well," you drawl with a forced smile, "you'd like that, wouldn't you? so, your next girl can steal it for herself."

she immediately bursts into a loud round of laughter, her gap revealing itself unabashedly. your eyes linger on it, struck with a sudden bolt of fondness. it's one part of her that is unarguably adorable.

you turn away before she can catch you, heading to the kettle to pour the boiling water into your tumblr.

"wait, no," sevika calls out from the couch, eyes still fixed on the newspaper. "the counter."

your eyes curiously travel to the wooden surface, gulping in surprise when you see a fresh pot already made. you know sevika always drinks coffee before her shift at the mechanic's, but that's usually just a single cup. never an entire pot like this. "did you, uh, make this for me?"

"don't flatter yourself. just take some."

her voice is a grunt and no-nonsense, not allowing for her meaning to be minced whatsoever. she wants you taking the coffee, and that's that.

with a bitten smile, you pour it into your tumblr, the pleasant scent of it wafting through your nostrils. it's the brand you always use, the one you've offered to sevika before that she's never actually taken you up on. at least until now.

she's at least half-redeemed to you until she says, "just needed some energy after last night, you know? wait, what am I saying? you were listening, won't you?"

your skin stretches over your knuckles as you tightly grip the doorknob.

jackass.

roommate!sevika who you try to get back at by watching obscenely loud porn. sometimes, you touch yourself to it, while other times, you just let it play in the background while folding your laundry, or wiping the dust from your furniture. you know it's immature as fuck, and will probably never equate to the personal touch of her being the one to incite those noises when trying to piss you off. but, hey, if it keeps her up at night and pisses her off, you're more than content. and judging from the glares she silently shoots you in the morning, you can tell you're succeeding.

at least, until one day, she leans in from behind when you're making eggs, her mouth lowered to your ear, and mutters, "c'mon, you're easy on the eyes. can't be so hard to find someone that you resort to porn, right?"

your nostrils flare, nearly slamming down the pan on the stove. "oh, fuck off."

"don't you mean 'fuck me'?"

your mouth cracks into an almost-smile. it's one thing to wanna fuck sevika, it's a whole other thing to have your stomach tighten up from how funny she is. makes it all the harder to deal with your current predicament. "no, I mean 'fuck you,' actually -- thanks for helping with that clarification."

"anytime," she huffs in amusement, lightly smacking your shoulder, which sends you nearly tumbling from her strength.

you glare at her back as she leaves. god, it's a good back. you hate that she has a good back.

roommate!sevika who's almost... thankful for this situation? because paying more attention to you, being in your way more often, ends up revealing to her that she was, admittedly, a damn fool for not having taken notice of you earlier.

because you're smart. like, wicked smart. what she suspects is mostly out of spite, you've started leaning over her shoulder, your scent flooding her senses as you spoil the answers to her crossword puzzles. at first, she rolled her eyes, grumbling that she would've gotten it without your help. but, now, she anticipates your stupid antics before you can even think about disrupting her mood with it. that translates to her raising the newspaper to you right as you meet her in the kitchen, an action which you first met with a disapproving glare.

but, in a matter of days, you're sitting right next to her, a pencil in hand, the two of you debating over answers together and groaning in frustration whenever you get something wrong.

when you bump her arm, whining, "c'mon, I told you it was wrong!" she can feel her face heat up like some fucking teenager.

and when you roll your eyes when her answer ends up being the right on, it only eggs her on, the motion usually followed with her murmuring, "sorry, what was that again?"

whenever you two finish, she always says, "thanks for ruining it," to which you singsong, "anytime, sevika."

and she hates to admit it, but you're funny, too. there've been several times where she's actually been rendered silent from just how good a comeback of yours was, or where you said something that caught her so off guard she nearly laughed in a moment where she was just annoyed.

and fuck her, you're so fine. so goddamn fine.

a notion that seizes at her when you come out of your bedroom one evening, dressed from head to toe in clothes she certainly has never seen you in before. clothes you'd surely never wear to work or when lounging at home.

she licks her lips, her mouth suddenly feeling very, very dry. "what-- where are you--?"

"putting myself out there." you shrug, idly stroking a palm along your head, smoothing your hair. "I mean, it always works for you. and, you're right, porn can only do so much. I think it's time for me to, you know, actually try to get with someone."

sevika's jaw clenches. like the fuck you will. "no."

"what do you mean 'no'?" you scoff, swinging your bag over your shoulder. "I can do whatever I want."

"well, I'm not letting you do this," she snaps, standing from her seat on the couch and rushing to block you from the door.

"why not?"

"because I--" she cuts herself off, teeth pressing in together as her mind is shaken with an influx of thoughts. because what can she even say? it's not just about wanting to fuck, not anymore. she's actually interested now. so interested that it's been weeks since she last brought a girl over. no point in doing so if her mind is filled with thoughts of you touching yourself to the noises, anyways.

you raise an eyebrow, crossing your arms over your chest. "yes?"

she leans in closer, propping a hand next to where your shoulders rest along the door. there's an inexplicable urge tugging her forwards to you, and she doesn't have it in her to resist it. "because I," she rasps, her voice low and scratchy, "I want you safe."

jesus, is she an idiot?

your face is deadpan, not a twitch of expression in sight. "you do it all the time. besides, how will I learn unless I'm out there, doing it?" after a beat skips between you two, you add, "unless you wanna come with?"

sevika snorts. "you really think I'm gonna watch you fuck about with some other people who don't deserve you?"

you brace your head against the plane of the door, eyes tracing over her face, making sevika's skin tingle in response. "then, who does?" you mutter quietly.

your tone is no longer flat. it's raised in pitch a bit, almost sounding hopeful. sevika swallows hard, her own body beginning to tense in anticipation. she latches onto that audible sign, using it to propel her forward until her lips are ghosting yours.

"me, you idiot."

and with that, she cups your face, drawing you into a soft kiss, your chapstick-smeared lips thick and slippery against hers.

roommate!sevika who makes you come so many times that night that you lose track. first with her head between your thighs, mouthing at your clit, fingers pumping into your hole as she spreads you loose and open. her lips wrap around the stiffened bud, drawing it in in tight, sharp sucks, the pressure of the movements making your legs tremble around her head, pressing into her ears without relent.

"damn, you trying to suffocate me?" she murmurs against your clit, the vibrations of her words making you whimper.

"it's what you deserve," you chuckle once the fog has cleared a bit, the noise dissolving into a whine when her tongue darts out, flapping over your clit with hard presses up and down, up and down.

"you're right," she hums, pressing a soft kiss to the spot just as her fingers curl up and begin stroking your g-spot, making streams of pleasure pulse from your pussy into your tummy, which tightens in anticipation. "I've been a dick to you, huh? I'll make it up to you tonight."

and make it up she does, her strap plunging into you and stretching your hole into a dull ache as her strong fingers hook onto her headboard, raising herself over you as your hips smack together. the mix of lube and your juices send filthy little squelches flowing through the room, and the noise only adds to the whirlwind of pleasure she's throwing you into without pause.

when she kisses you hard, making you whine as her fingers wrap around your throat and her tongue shoves into you, you can't resist quipping through your moans, "gotta say -- those girls had a point."

she chuckles against your mouth, nipping at your bottom lip. "and I was going easy on them. just wait till I'm done with you."

roommate!sevika who wraps her arm around you when smoking her cigarette afterwards. after lying together with nothing but some faded music playing in the background for a few minutes, she presses a tentative, slow kiss to your head, muttering, "I wish I had started talking to you earlier on."

you blink in surprise from the words, the tenderness of the moment sending a flood of emotions through you. you don't want to sound needy, but now that the topic has been brought up, a part of you aches for reassurance, wishing for the hollow part of you her initial avoidance had bore to be filled. "was it because I seemed uninteresting, or...?"

"no, no," she immediately cuts in, her voice hard. "I just wasn't interested in bonding with any roommate. never have been." her nails gently skim along your arm, and her voice lowers before confessing, "I thought you were sweet, though."

that sends satisfaction pumping through you, and you need to purse your lips together to halt a wide smile from breaking over your face. "yeah?"

"yeah, until you started being a little fucking menace," she whispers with a grin, her hand snaking down to squeeze your ass, a motion which nearly sends you moaning.

"hey, you started it with your panty-stealing girl."

"my panty-stealing girl?" she asks incredulously, her chin pointing down to shoot you a wide-eyed, incredulous look. "you think I'm gonna call anyone mine except you now?"

feeling suddenly bashful from the bold declaration, you nuzzle into her neck, your face heating up. "I don't know."

"huh, you know, you're cute like this. docile, quiet--"

"oh, fuck off."

she laughs, lightly pinching your arm, which sends you squealing. "eh, I knew it only could've lasted so long."

"like you'd have it any other way."

she takes a drag, the corner of her lips curling up. "got a point there."

no sentences and/or parts of my writing are allowed to be reposted or reused without explicit permission or credits given.

[nanamineedstherapy]

Ooga Booga Gojo tries to Court you

Previous Chapter 1: Ooga Booga Battle Royale (Tumblr/Ao3)

Summary: Prehistoric, period-accurate Neanderthal JJK daddies courting you with grunts, rocks, & zero verbal communication. Just prehistoric buffoonery.

A/N: I wasn’t gonna do a part two, but apparently, many of you are feral and demanded more, so here we are. => This is a different reader, but the same Gojo—unfortunately for you. => Some bits might be slightly suggestive (mentions of mating), but nothing in detail, only in comedy. => This is Gojo’s chapter, but don’t worry—the other guys are also getting their solo stories, with guest appearances in each other’s on a regular. So I recommend reading all of them, but I can’t force you to make good life choices. Now, enjoy the chaos.

Gojo Satoru wakes up face down in dirt.

Brain? Scrambled.

Skull? Pulsing like tribe drum.

First mate? Gone. Vanished. Poof.

Gojo blinks. Confused.

Grunts. (Where bonk mate? Where cave cuddle?)

Nothing. Only wind, dirt, and pain.

He grunts, stands. Shakes off the dirt like a dog, and squints against the glaring prehistoric sun. Then—

Oh.

Oh.

Shiny.

Gojo decides you are shiny.

Not rock-shiny. Better.

You glow like big fire in sky.

Gojo’s brain: Mine.

He lunges like wild beast with zero coordination. Arms flailing. Legs kicking.

You grunt. (NO.)

To you he looks like an old man with dusty white hair and a dusty large white beard.

Not good mate material.

You grab a rock.

And bonk.

Hard.

Gojo blinks.

Head throbs.

But he is built different.

Bones like a mountain. Skull thick. (No thoughts.)

He absorbs the impact like it’s just a pesky mosquito bite.

“Grrr!” he growls, shaking off the hit, eyes wide with a mix of admiration and sheer determination.

Translation: Me want shiny!

You stare back, half-amused, half-terrified

He then grins.

Breaks a coconut with his arms. Then flexes.

Translation: Me STRONG. You MINE.

You?

You grunt back. (Die.)

But he does not die.

Instead, he grabs you.

Easily.

It’s like picking up a small animal.

You scream.

Bite.

Kick.

Writhing? Yes.

He giggles.

And hauls you away.

His tailbone wagging like some long-lost creature that never made it into the history books.

You hiss.

Doesn’t matter.

He’s giggling.

---

His cave is—insane.

Just... useless, reflective rocks. (They are gemstones, but you are too big brain to know yet.)

He dumps you on a relatively comfortable pile and sits cross-legged in front of you, wagging mammoth-like white eyebrows.

You put one shiny in your mouth and chomp on it.

Almost break teeth.

They do NOTHING.

Not food.

Just useless shiny.

You rub your jaw wincing.

Gojo grins proudly.

Gestures at the pile of shiny.

Grunts. (Good cave. Best cave.)

You stare.

He stares back.

You bonk him on the head with the rock.

He gasps.

Betrayal!

But you do not care for his emotional damage.

You grunt. (Why no food?)

He tilts his head.

Like a confused wolf pup.

You grab your stomach.

Point outside.

Chomp air dramatically. (FOOD.)

This should be a simple task. A test of basic survival skills.

Gojo pouts.

And dramatically flails onto the cave floor.

Then stares at you like a man contemplating the weight of the universe.

Gojo sighs like a dying mammoth.

Grunts. (No want.)

You throw another bigger rock at him.

He gasps.

Another BETRAYAL!!

But also?

Braincell activated.

Gojo drags himself outside.

Grumbling.

Pouting.

Reluctant.

Like a child forced to fetch water.

---

Gojo tries to hunt.

Looks for big beast. Small beast. Any beast.

No prey. No food.

Nothing.

His stomach grumbles.

Gojo’s brain. (??? Starve???)

But then.

Big brain moment. Like divine inspiration from an unknown prehistoric god, he gets an idea.

He runs to and peers.

Into Nanami’s cave.

Nanami has much meat.

Stored.

Safe.

Also, Nanami is busy right now.

Mating.

Sees his rival absolutely plowing his woman.

His respect for privacy is nonexistent.

Gojo grins.

He sneaks in, giggling to himself, and starts hauling an entire chunk of dried meat out of the stash.

It’s heavy. Unwieldy.

He’s tiptoeing, which is hard when you have no shoes and the floor is rock.

Nanami almost notices.

He grunts.

Pauses.

Looks around.

Then shrugs and goes back to his woman, who’s busy making cave paintings on his back with her nails.

Success.

Gojo runs away like a thief in the night, dragging the stolen meat back and grinning like a victorious idiot.

Which was a whole six feet from his cave.

Very brave.

You see Gojo carring meat.

Big meat.

Looks good.

Too good.

You squint and grunt. (Hunt where?)

Gojo freezes.

Grins.

Gestures vaguely. (Over there.)

You grunt. (Lie.)

Gojo grins bigger. Nervously. (No.)

You narrow your eyes.

But meat is meat.

You take. You eat. He eats.

The meal is good. It is... almost pleasant.

Gojo relieved.

Until—

Rock flies out of nowhere.

WHACK!!!

Gojo collapses.

Directly into your chest.

Unconscious.

Nanami, standing in distance, furious. (THIEF.)

You blink and look down at Gojo.

Who is drooling on your chest and smiling for some reason.

You shrug and continue eating.

Nanami’s woman drags him back to their cave by his hair, and he goes back to plowing her.

---

The next morning, you wake up to a horror scene. Not a mammoth stampede, not an unexpected saber-toothed tiger attack—something worse.

The cave is disgusting.

Bones scattered like some sort of primitive murder mystery. Half-eaten fruits fermenting into what is, hopefully, not the first beer. Piles of unidentified objects—some organic, some suspiciously shiny, all offensive. It smells like wet fur, old fire, and bad decisions.

You turn to the source of this chaos. Gojo.

Sleeping peacefully. Sprawled out like a very contented, very problematic deity.

His wild, tangled hair is half-covered in dried mud.

A single bone dangles precariously from his beard.

His makeshift loincloth is barely doing its job.

You throw a rock at his head and he wakes up startled like a pray.

You glare at him. Then the mess. Then back at him.

You point. Stern. Judgmental. (This. Is. Filth.)

Gojo squints. Tilts his head like a confused baby mammoth. (What. Is. Problem?)

You do the only reasonable thing. You grab a rock and aggressively scrub a small patch of the cave floor. Clean.

Gojo watches. Gasps. Betrayal. Yet Again.

He clutches his chest like you just stabbed him with a saber-toothed toothbrush. Dramatically throws himself onto the floor. Rolls once for emphasis. (Why? Why do this? This is not way of cave.)

You are unmoved. You thrust a hand at the chaos. (Fix. Now.)

Gojo groans. Drags his knuckles like he’s about to march into monkey battle. He begins picking up his treasures—various shiny rocks, random bones, a stick that looks vaguely like a snake—and starts organizing them into piles. The categories make no sense.

You throw out a particularly suspicious-looking object.

Gojo gasps. Almost cries.

You ignore his dramatic arm clutching. Cleaning continues.

After an exhausting amount of actual hygiene, the cave finally reaches a semi-respectable state. But one final task remains.

You grab Gojo’s loincloth (that’s the only thing he wears, and the rest of him is too gross to touch) and drag him somewhere.

He grins and follows.

No survival instincts.

Too happy to be walked around like a dog by his woman.

Once there, you point at Gojo. Then at the river. (Wash. Now.)

Gojo whines again, this time more dramatically. Final Betrayal.

He shakes his head. Backs away. Flails. (No! Water is enemy! It steals warmth! It is cold death!)

You are smarter.

You grab him.

You drag him.

He claws at the dirt, wailing like a dying dinosaur. (Mercy! Mercy! I did nothing wrong!)

You do not care.

With a mighty shove, you push him into the river. He vanishes beneath the surface, limbs flailing like an overgrown, drowning bat.

Then—

He emerges.

Oh.

Oh no.

The mud is gone.

The dirt is gone.

The layers of filth, possibly accumulated over years, are gone.

Gojo is now blindingly clean. Too clean. Also, looks like a wet white cat because there is no blowout for Neanderthals and their naval-length bread plus hair combo.

The sun catches on his gleaming skin, illuminating him like some divine being sent to curse the land with unbearable brightness. His hair—previously a natural camouflage of filth and dust—is now a shocking, blinding white. His skin, underneath all that grime, is ghostly pale. The water around him glows like some celestial event.

A beacon of unfortunate genetics.

You shield your eyes. (Too bright.)

Gojo stares at his reflection in the water.

Blinks once.

Twice.

Then—

A bloodcurdling, soul-shaking scream.

He flails backward. Trips. Falls into the river again.

You sigh.

This will take a while.

---

Soon after, Gojo Satoru is in love.

Or at least, he thinks he is.

His bones feel weird when he looks at you. His stomach too. Like hunger, but not.

You are the best thing in his cave (besides his shiny rocks).

But you? You treat him like an inconvenience.

Like a raccoon that won’t leave.

This is unacceptable.

So, he must court you.

Gojo watches other men in the tribe. He studies their tactics.

The way they bonk their women.

How they share food.

How they puff their chests to look stronger.

He has plans.

Gojo selects the shiniest rock in his collection. It glimmers in the firelight. He holds it up. Perfect.

He marches to you and slams it into your hands, chest puffed in victory.

You stare at the rock.

Then at him.

Then at the pile of identical rocks behind you.

You drop it.

Gojo gasps.

He clutches his chest like you have stabbed him.

Attempt failed.

He moves onto the next attemp. 

He sees how men impress women with movement.

So, he dances.

It is horrible.

Arms flailing. Knees bending in ways knees should not.

He jumps. Spins. Grunts. Nearly dislocates something.

He looks at you, sweaty and expectant.

You blink.

Get up.

Walk away.

He flops onto the floor in despair.

On to the next attempt.

Men show their strength. He must do the same.

So, Gojo grabs a rock.

A big one.

He lifts it.

Grunts.

Lifts it again. Louder grunt.

He looks at you for approval.

You look unimpressed.

Gojo panics.

Lifts a bigger rock.

It is too big.

His legs shake.

Spine bends.

He collapses under the rock.

You do not save him. Immediately.

He makes a final attempt: the ultimate sacrifice.

Gojo hates sharing food.

But he must.

So, he presents you with the best meat from the latest hunt. (Stolen from Nanami again.)

He doesn’t even take a bite first. He just hands it to you and watches.

You inspect. Take a slow bite.

It is... good. (Because Nanami actually cooks his meat.)

Your face softens.

You look at him differently.

Not as a dumb cave rat, but as a... potential mate?

Gojo sees it.

The shift.

His tailbone wags.

He giggles.

Then you pick up a shiny rock—the one he gave you earlier.

Hold it up.

Gojo freezes.

Oh.

OH.

SHE ACCEPTS.

He screams in happiness.

Falls to the floor. Rolls around like a deranged animal.

You watch, both amused and deeply concerned.

The courtship has worked.

You are his now.

And unfortunately, he is yours.

---

Days pass. You get used to Gojo’s presence.

Mostly.

Now that Gojo is your problem, you take a good look at him.

He is... old?

His navel-length beard, his wild, tangled hair, all white as bone. You assume he was ancient. Unfit for mating. Practically dust.

You frown in thought. You are young so you need a strong mate.

But you have already accepted the rock.

There is no undoing the rock.

Gojo, unaware of your internal crisis, is giggling in his sleep.

You sigh. There must be a way.

Then, next day, you see him.

Nanami.

The only man in the tribe who does not look like an unwashed bear.

His face is smooth. (Because, of course, it is. Even in prehistoric times, Nanami knows how to shave. Unlike you and your mate.)

His hair is also controlled.

You grab your mate’s jaw and make him look at Nanami.

Gojo, who was previously busy comparing his toes with yours and giggling to himself, squints and points. (What?)

You pull his bread. (Why man-face not look like mammoth fur?)

Gojo is intrigued. He stalks Nanami.

For days, he watches. Hiding behind bushes. Peeking over rocks.

Then one fateful morning, you see it.

Nanami is using a sharpened shell.

Scraping the hair from his face.

Gojo gasps. (Magic.)

You gasp. (Forbidden ritual.)

Gojo nods. (We do.)

You nod. (We do.)

Later, you steal the shell.

Gojo sits. Determined.

You shave.

It is not graceful.

You butcher his beard. It is uneven. Patchy.

He looks like a plucked bird.

Then, his hair.

You cut. Too much.

Now, instead of looking old, Gojo looks... strange.

Like a newborn rat.

You stare.

Gojo stares in a nearby puddle.

Both of you realize the mistake.

Then—

A shadow looms over you both.

It’s Nanami’s woman.

She sees the shell. The shaved Gojo. The hacked hair.

She gasps.

She roars.

She points. (THEY TOUCH MY MAN’S MAGIC SHELL!!!)

You both scream.

Nanami’s woman lunges.

You both run.

But then Gojo trips.

So you drag him.

Behind you, she is gaining.

You dive into your cave and block the entrance with a boulder. Then you both pant and sweat.

Gojo, breathless, touches his face. (I look different?)

You nod. (Still ugly. But not old.)

Gojo grins. (Good enough.)

Outside, Nanami’s woman snarls. Threatens death.

Gojo winks at you.

You roll your eyes.

Nanami puts his woman on his back and takes her back to their cave for dinner.

//

The next day you stare at Gojo and gesture for him to follow you out.

He does, like always, thinking you are finally taking him on a prehistoric date.

Then you grab a sharp rock.

Gojo’s eyes go wide in fear.

You point at his face. Then the rock. Then back at his face. (Fix. Now.)

Gojo screams and flees.

You chase.

The entire tribe watches as you tackle him, pin him down, and shave his beard like a shearing an unwilling goat.

Gojo flails.

Whines.

Cries.

But only when it is done, you step back.

And blink.

He is… Not rat.

Gojo blinks too.

Touches his smooth face.

Squints at his own reflection in a puddle.

Then his eyes widen.

He gasps. A discovery!!

He points at his reflection. Then at you. Then at his reflection again. (I… am… beautiful???)

You nod. (Yes. Obviously.)

He gasps again. A second discovery.

He points at himself. Then at you. Then back at himself. (You… like? You… choose?)

You stare.

Then sigh.

Grab the shiny rock he gave you.

Hold it up.

Gojo screams.

Falls to the floor. Rolls around like a deranged animal.

The tribe cheers.

You sigh again.

This idiot is yours now.

A/N: Drop your chaotic demands (you can also suggest other JJK characters of any gender or gender bender) in the comments, and may the most deranged option win. You guys send your ideas as well in my ask on Tumblr.

Next chapter will be out soon. :)

All Works Masterlist

[rekaisbored]

Posting a fic excerpt again bc im bored and in need of any and all validation (story of my life😖)

“Regulus?” He hears a voice from behind him. He mutters another string of curses, quickly wiping his cheeks from the wetness of his tears before turning around to see James bloody Potter.

He groans, his head tipping back. “Potter.”

“Hey.” The Gryffindor boy whispers. “Can I sit?”

Regulus knows he should say no. He also knows it wouldn’t matter. “Sit.” He says, expecting Potter to take a seat on one of the benches by the wall. He sucks in a surprised breath when instead, he slumps down onto the floor, scooting close to Regulus. “Sirius must be really desperate if he sent you after me. Everyone in this school knows I tolerate you even less than my… than Sirius.”

Potter flashes him a broad grin, his cheeks forming small dimples on either side of his stretching smile. “Your brother, you mean. You can say it, he is your brother.”

If it wasn’t for the unfortunate and incomprehensible fact that Regulus finds himself insanely and miserably attracted to James Potter’s body, he figures he would’ve pushed him out the window by this point. “No. You are his brother. I only used to be.”

James does a double take at him, his mouth slightly open in shock. “Is that what you really think?” He blurts.

Regulus closes his eyes but opens them immediately after a memory of Sirius flashes in his mind. “Do I look like I would make the effort of lying for you and your lot of all people?”

“Well, you did lie to Sirius when you told him you willingly took the mark.” James says.

“How do you know it wasn’t the truth?”

For a while, the only answer he gets is a shrug. “Because I think you’re a good person, Regulus.” Potter announces then simply, and Regulus considers that if he can’t push him out of the tower maybe he himself should jump. It’s too much, James of all people here, the person he hates more than anyone, yet he is so thankful to, for being a new brother to Sirius, for taking him in when he had nowhere to go, for loving and caring for him the way he never could. It’s too much, that he sits on the freezing floor with him and smiles and casually says things like that.

Find me on ao3 (noonelikesamadwoman) if u liked this

[pbaz7]

was going through an insane crash out yesterday and the tenn game was just the cherry on top. really needing this rn lmao.

“Go back to sleep, pretty.”

tearing up alr

“You’re lucky you look like your mama, you know that?”

if their kid does end up looking like azzi that little girl is about to be spoiled beyond anyone's wildest dreams

“Yeah, yeah, I know. You’re more important,” she sighed, giving her tiny hand a gentle squeeze.

🥹

“She thinks I don’t know it, but she’s been running my life since I was fifteen.”

azzi had her on a leash for nearly a decade atp

“I swear, she could tell me to do anything, and I’d do it. No hesitation,” Paige admitted, a small smile tugging at her lips. “And now you? I just know you’re gonna be the same way. I’m gonna be in trouble with you two. Probably broke.”

at least she's aware!

“And you? You’re the best thing we ever did…”

ever better than getting that 2025 natty?! (let me stay delusional)

Azzi’s heart melted.

how could it not

Azzi watched in disbelief before shaking her head. “Oh, this is ridiculous. She’s already got a favorite.”

p tends to have that effect on people unfortunately (fortunately)

Aliana was sound asleep, bundled up in her little UConn onesie, oblivious to the fact that she was about to make her first official appearance in Gampel Pavilion.

uconn fan since BIRTH quite literally

Azzi sighed, shaking her head as a small smile pulled at her lips. “I still can’t believe we call him Grandpa now.”

oh em gee this is adorable. geno pls get ur act together and stop making game losing calls and maybe this can happen irl!

“Oh. My. God,” she gasped, eyes wide with shock and excitement.

still extra and dramatic all these years later

her fingers already moving to undo the straps.

can't even call you out for the double entendre bc this is genuinely so adorable

Ice shook her head, laughing. “Oh, you already on that parent logic, huh?”

girl math parent logic

just Paige and Azzi, tucked into each other like they were back in college, stealing moments in between practices.

just thinking about them being so cute and annoying during practice and lit tearing up. I can't have it be over guys😭

Paige tightened her hold, letting out a small hum of satisfaction. “I missed this,” she admitted. “Just… holding you.”

longing for simpler times right with p and az... oh how I miss Hopkins p

“You’re my wife. Meaning you’re irreplaceable, Bueckers.”

literally can't imagine either of them with anyone else

When they pulled away, she whispered, “God, you’re beautiful.”

azzi almost looks like ai she's so perfect. like sometimes I wonder if she's real

Paige smirked. “I do know. But please tell me more.”

she's just the same

“Yeah, but when she doesn’t want to sleep unless she’s on your chest?

this trait seems to be hereditary then...

Paige pulled out the tiny noise-canceling headphones and carefully adjusted them over Aliana’s little head.

just thinking of kate martin holding her nephew with those stupid little headphones over his head

The moment people noticed the baby in Paige’s arms, the volume somehow got even louder.

cuz they know that little girl bout to be playing for them in like 17 years

After a moment, Paige sighed and carefully, almost reluctantly, shifted Aliana into Azzi’s arms.

this is so dad watching the Super Bowl core

Paige smirked. “Guess she likes messing with you already. Knew she’d be just like me.”

azzi got TWO of these hoes to deal with. someone give her an award for patience

“I get it, baby. Auntie Nika is a lot sometimes.”

would NEVER in a million years trust nika with my kid... but love that for p and az!

but they’re practically vibrating waiting to meet you.”

me core I fear

“She was always putting me first. It didn’t matter how much pressure she was under, how exhausted she was from practice—she always made sure I felt loved.”

azzi stop talking before I start sobbing

You and me? We’re the luckiest girls in the world.”

and a tear rolled down my cheek🥹

Paige leans in and presses a quick but lingering kiss to her lips, not caring in the slightest about the people around them.

just one of these is all I want! it doesn't even have to be on the lips guys just a cute little kiss on the forehead at the draft or smth

“I mean, can you blame me? I bagged the most beautiful woman in the world and we have the cutest baby ever. I think I’ve earned the right to be a little cocky.”

I mean she does have a point...

Paige and Azzi both chuckle at the comment. Paige leans in slightly toward Azzi, murmuring, “They’re already trying to recruit her.”

knowing who her parents are you can't blame em

“Move over, CD. Let me see my granddaughter.”

gramps is so sassy lmao

a familiar but unexpected face appeared beside them.

wait im scared

“You and Azzi still going strong, huh?”

who is this ugly hoe..

As soon as the woman was out of earshot, Azzi turned to Paige. “I thought we were done with your groupies at this stage.”

nah that's just what comes with marrying Paige bueckers

Now, Azzi was straddling Paige’s lap, her arms draped lazily over Paige’s shoulders as they kissed.

OH?!

“Doesn’t change anything,” she said, her voice low but firm. “You know I can’t do it.”

yeah im on team Paige here I would efintley not have sex in front of my kid lmao... no matter how young they are

Azzi let out a laugh just before Paige kissed her again, pulling her under the warmth of the water, their laughter fading into something softer.

can't even be mad I was robbed cuz this is adorable

ugh I love pazzi as parents so much

truly still in shambles about yesterday

dare I say I knew we were gonna lose from before the game even started...

anyway author, as usual, I love you

-🍉

tearing up alr

everybody said this 😭

ever better than getting that 2025 natty?! (let me stay delusional)

exactly you see the vision..yup..yup

oh em gee this is adorable. geno pls get ur act together and stop making game losing calls and maybe this can happen irl!

please luigi i need you to get it together

azzi almost looks like ai she's so perfect. like sometimes I wonder if she's real

this is so real

would NEVER in a million years trust nika with my kid... but love that for p and az!

i wouldn’t trust any of them with a child

and a tear rolled down my cheek

sorry 😬

just one of these is all I want! it doesn't even have to be on the lips guys just a cute little kiss on the forehead at the draft or smth

man gimme something please

also i’m letting that game drift from my memory permanently ✨

[actual-changeling]

Very good analysis, OP! We really do not talk about the gender aspect enough.

Another episode that I feel really fits into this is Excelsis Dei. Mulder doesn't understand how personal this case is for Scully, how horrible the experience that the nurse went through is—that it doesn't matter who or what it was, they need to solve it.

A "logical" leap for him. Mulder always trusts the victims, he always trusts their insane theories and stories, he always goes with the most out-there option. EXCEPT when it comes to rape apparently.

MULDER: Given the emotional and psychological violence of rape, the face or identity of the attacker is often blurred or erased from memory. That he could be perceived as invisible is a logical leap for me.

Then there's the interaction in the bathroom with Hal where Scully is exposed (quite literally) to sexual harassment and he a) doesn't even attempt to protect her and b) makes fun of it right after.

SCULLY: What do you think, Mulder? MULDER: (grinning at her) About the guy's plumbing? SCULLY: About his story.

Someone shoving their genitals into your face and then further harassing you is far from funny, Mulder—and you FAILED to protect her. She looks to you for help because unfortunately men only take other men seriously. She looked to him so he would get them out of this situation but he just kept going.

Later, he's not doing much better.

MULDER: Between the rape case and the Alzheimer's? When they're not drawing childlike pictures they're brutal sex offenders?

He simply does not understand the weight of the women's experiences but Scully does, most likely because she's been in at the very least one situation like that. Being a woman or queer automatically makes you a target for sexual harassment from the day you're born.

Scully cannot just walk away from this and he can—that's the defining difference.

MULDER: I-I think you're looking too hard, Scully, for something that's not there. I think Michelle Charters concocted this story to get out of a job she hates. SCULLY: Her lip required 13 stitches. The blow to her head resulted in a subdural hematoma. That's quite a concoction. Look, I just want to talk to a few more patients there. We can catch the same flight out tomorrow night.

For some reason, Mulder is a sexist asshole throughout the episode right up until the end. He undervalues Scully's theories and explanations, he applies the presumption of innocence to the offender but not to the victim. He didn't do anything but she is lying, with her obvious physical and psychic wounds; great guy.

All the sexist bullshit he does throughout this episode is, in my opinion, a big part of why Scully says she cannot talik to him about this in Irresistible.

Mulder wants Scully to be vulnerable with him but he refuses to create a safe, trusted space in which she can do so without fear of judgement or betrayal. Him being a man means he has to work harder and he knows that, he just doesn't want to because this man is allergic to self-reflection.

Scully, Mulder, Gender, and Irresistible

Upon rewatch, what really struck me about 2x13 Irresistible is the way it prods and pries open the unspoken presence of gender within Mulder and Scully's working relationship.

Within the safety of their private little two-person world, you won't find many echoes of the misogyny that exists outside in society, or in their tremendously male-dominated profession. The implicit trust, respect, and mutual devotion that Mulder and Scully have built their friendship on is, in an of itself, a subversion of traditional gender norms. In their little world, they are equal to each other, have always been, and always will be.

But on the outside, if you pay attention, Scully is very very often the only woman in the room throughout this series. In police stations, meetings, at crime scenes, she carries that invisible burden. Suspects make passes at her on the job. Random people mistake her for Mulder's wife. But in Irresistible, the dial is turned up, and she is physically endangered because of her gender, and confronted with the existence of a vile hatred of women. She not only has to grapple with the terror of this fact, but the terror of being suddenly so much more vulnerable than her partner.

"I don't want him to feel like he has to protect me."

She wants to be by his side, not behind him, trotting at his heels, shielded from the world by him. Scully fears that if Mulder felt the need to protect her, in a way, that would tarnish the dynamic of their partnership. It would be admitting a weakness: and she's probably spent her entire career building walls around any possible weakness.

"I can't talk to him about this."

... Because he is a man. Mulder can be as understanding and supportive as he usually is, but deep down, he will never truly understand what it is like to be in her shoes in Irresistible. She is alone in this way, and that is horrifying.

So to me, (while the hug is truly life-changing), this little exchange is such a perfect moment of trust and affirmation within the episode.

At this point, Mulder knows that she's scared. Scully knows that she's scared. But they both recognize that being afraid doesn't make her weak, or any less capable, any less of a true partner than she always has been. Always.

Being a woman in a dangerous, male-dominated profession often means putting up high emotional walls for one's own safety. To be emotional, sensitive, or vulnerable can be seen as a sign of weakness. But at the end of Irresistible, Scully's emotional break is catharsis. It's not weak or humiliating ... it's very human.

[nordidia]

doodle set in pre-movie times from a few months ago,,,

[portraitoflestatonfire]

"...you've been my instructor in loving..."

[theanonymousninja247]

✨ Star Friends ✨

When I found out that @chessman-protocol boy Crit liked Astronomy, let’s just say I was beyond estatic and immediately planned this little comic. Here’s to my boy Vincent doing his best to make friends with folks who share similar interests 😅💙

Funny enough, I didn’t realize I put this in Vincent character’s until I looked at the whole thing, but Vincent very much shares the lack of stranger danger the way I did/ I do to this day. To quote one of my past managers I’m “abnormally friendly” or whatever

I can’t tell you how many times even as a small child (drove my parents nuts) that I saw a cool person with whatever connecting factor and I just straight up walked to them and was like “Ok cool. We’re friends now.” And nobody’s really stopped me? So apparently I have friends now. 😆

Vincent however is just a wholesome baby boy who doesn’t realize he’s actually an intimidating hunk of a turtle and randomly walking up to strangers and not saying anything can be taken the wrong way.

Like I said, he’s trying his best. He wasn’t exactly the most socialized if you can’t tell, but he does love dearly and is certainly a boone of a friend to have once you get past the inevitable social awkwardness. He’s loyal to put because he really doesn’t know better, and I adore him for that. Anyway, dunno if Crit knows any ASL or not, but either way Vincent is just excited to meet somebody else who likes space ✨🌌 💙

[k1tty5]

hello :D please tell me more about your mezalian (is that how you spell it??) smalletho I will forever be indebted to you

(they are gorgeous I love them sm)

hey hi !! it would be my pleasure … (and I’ve been spelling it mezalean ??? but i have no idea LOL. there might be a canon spelling but i havent watched joels esmp1 since… probably since it ended. i will have to check sometime)

apologizing in advance because i will probably get very ramble-y!!

ummm. Oh god. How to start. Lets see. WELL. In this silly little au (i guess it has become a bit more than just me doodling designs LOL) in my head they have like this sort of zelink dynamic? obviously without all the zelda lore & stuff, just that kind of … okay forgive me I haven’t brushed up on my zelink lore for a good many years but. Like the princess and her personal knight that doesn’t really talk much sort of thing.

this made more sense in my head. But yeah. They have the vibes of zelink ? At least if i remember zelink right, I have a really bad memory :’) not exactly the same, i do think etho talks to joel (whereas if iirc link never really talks) - especially after getting to know him a bit - but just. they have the Vibes. You know?

I reckon Joel’s definitely very into sculpting in this au, maybe dabbles a little in painting - I imagine mezalea to be very heavy on art and expression in general. think you’d especially see lots of pottery and textiles all around the place. He probably also has an interest in some form of like. um. whats the word. Some sort of … fighting. lmao. Specifically thinking of fencing, i had this idea in my head that he’s watched Etho practice outside the palace at some point and is just absolutely fascinated and enamored. by both the practice and etho himself haha.

and for etho… talented swordsman? he is Not washed. i dont really have many ideas for his character in this au To be completely honest, mostly just of his personality. Although, I alsooo think he’s probably not actually from mezalea? I like to draw him with those pointy elf ears, and i think mezaleans are just humans. I cant remember if thats canon or not but um. mezaleans have human ears, so i’d imagine etho’s probably from like.. rivendelle? Is that. What it’s called. The elf guys? Are they elves??? Goodness I cant remember. Grimlands would make sense too since i THINK they’re kind of like. technical engineer guys? but i dont know what species they are um so ,,, yeah,,,,

i think joel’s probably a bit put off by etho at first, mostly just because he’s not super enthused about the idea of a personal guard, but also because the guys a bit odd, you know? but he’s also probably suuuper intrigued by him. he wants to figure this new guy out, and when they start talking a bit more, i think. They are both incredibly charmed by the other. head over heels? possibly.

most of my ideas of this au are just little scenes that are cute and silly but dont follow any main plot. I would love to write some one-shots of some of the ideas i have in the future, but as of right now im experiencing a bout of creative burnout and am busy with the holidays - spending time with family, so… not right now lol!

hopefully this is what you wanted,,,, i tend to get very ramble-y when talking about literally anything, so i do apologize for that haha, i am Not good at explaining things in simple ways, as i’ve said many a time before.

[smilingfriends]

Meet the FREAKIN ARTIST!!!!!!!(me)

[kitkat13001]

update on love song event: i am hard at work on remaining requests! so far im planning to complete every one i’ve gotten so far, it just might take me a while bc i’ve been really busy as of late 🙈

[xproskeith]

I'm making anime opening credits in my head for Twenty One Pilots' lore, mostly with albums in mind.

So that's where we are.

[lesbiansanemi]

Remind me to never live with neurotypical ppl who have never had money issues in their life/have families who are willing to give them however much money they want whenever they ask. Genuinely infuriating ppl to live with who do not consider how their actions affect others ever. How am I on round 2 of this

[tbob-enthusiast]

Messy school doodles HAHEHHE

Season 2 Robbie (not canon Robbie ofc, but rather the "S2" of my own fic which I may or may not ever finish). The lore is that his hair was MUCH longer than this, but it got shaved off due to Lore Reasons™ and now it's growing back :]

NOT STAN. That's my beta Dipper HAHEHHEE. My notes are just emphasizing how similar they look. Me, earlier today, drawing beta Dipper: "STAN PINES ?! 😨😮😮😨😨😨"

Perhaps. Gay people. I am thinking about it really hard fr

[easyaesthetics]

Imitates human behaviors to an uncanny degree, Akira remembers from the lab notes. Mimic skill on par with any natural predator that imitates another animal to lure in prey.

Scene from the amazing mermaid fic, I like to think I’m a good person by @relationshipcrimes (READ THE TAGS BEFORE BEGINNING)

[phagodyke]

dating an art student was so crazy I'm just thinking abt that one birthday I had where my ex got me stickers from the etsy of the person they were cheating on me with....