#they just escaped hell ?
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When the ghost who read to you as you died activates all of your Must Protect instincts
#payneland#edwin x charles#dead boy detectives#dbda#join me as I try to ignore all of the sad implications hidden on this one#even though I was the one who hid them there#like edwin being scared of spiders#sure but charles thinking about his death as something pathetic?#comparing the way he was murdered by his own friends#to this other boy who escaped HELL?#who is kind and knowledgeable and clearly not weak#unlike charles himself who will never be worthy?#give my boy some self esteem issues#wait i'm not ignoring the sad implications#ignore that I just wanted to show that charles probably thought Edwin was pretty aces
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one downside to digital mediums of art is that you cant see the tear stains (they just slide down the screen)
#turtlearts#tf2#team fortress 2#not even gonna lie i dont think ive ever struggled to draw as much as i had during this time#these are also a couple months old . and oh my god#i literally thought i was going insane. deep in the clutches of 3/4 head hell and i couldnt escape#like no sleep levels of drawing the same thing again and again until i either got exhausted or just gave up#when the therapist and psych nurse i had at uni said that i have ocd tendencies maybe they were onto something lowkey#side note but thanks to tf2 spy i got a butterfly knife trainer bc i wanted to do tricks#unfortunately i lost the knife :(( but i did learn a couple (really simple) tricks which was neat :)
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#real#girlblogging#girly things#self healing#girlhood#girlblogger#gaslight gatekeep girlboss#whisper girl#girlboss#lana del rey#femcel#female hysteria#female manipulator#escapism#existentialism#dark feminine energy#esoteric#my year of rest and relaxation#born to die#this is a girlblog#this is what makes us girls#localy hated#just girly things#hell is a teenage girl#the bell jar#the feminine urge#the feminine urge to gatekeep#manic pixie dream girl#cinnamon girl#they hate to see a girlboss winning
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#mommy issues#it’s my first time living too#girlblogging#hell is a teenage girl#girlhood#this is a girlblog#this is what makes us girls#lana del rey#depressing shit#just girly things#escaping reality#i hate everything
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Luka vs. Till is the funniest faceoff tho. Like, what is Till even gonna DO? Purebred pedigree dog vs. stray mystery mutt found in the garbage and literally 50% discounted, FJFJEKFKDKCJEJ-
#dee p thoughts#alien stage#alnst#vivinos#luka might as well just pull out a gun and shoot till at the get go#IVAN YOU HAD A CHANCE WHAT IS TILL GONNA DOOOOOO#i trust in ivans big escape brain hes totally planned this hell figure it outttttt
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george rexstrew deserves awards for many things but i have to say. edwin’s bloodcurdling scream as niko gets killed deserves a whole award unto itself. like. that scream did not feel at all like a tv show scream. to a somewhat jarring degree. and i can’t express how much I respect that
#he has a number of very convincing screams and suffering noises which I imagine was an important prerequisite for the role#but this one is just especially chilling and again. jarring. not saying that the other actors are bad or anything but no one even comes#close to competing with george and its stark in moments like this#another screaming moment that I thought he did really well in particular is far easier to gloss over and that’s#when he and charles are escaping hell and he almost gets dragged down into lust#when he’s screaming out for charles he borderline SCREECHES#throughout that arc in general it’s just incredible but yeah#I think part of what makes it so convincing is that he isn’t afraid to be high pitched and genuinely Scream rather than yell#like. he is clearly immune to being put off by ‘you scream like a girl’ rhetoric#I think a lot of male actors avoid screaming and screeching like that for that internalized reason when. if you wanna be as realistic as#possible. a scream is high pitched. if you’re scared for your fucking life it’s just involuntary#I can also see it being uncommon due to difficulties getting that sound adequately recorded but yeah anyway you get my point#tldr: george rexstrew is great at disturbingly realistic screaming and I applaud him for that#I really hope he didn’t have to retake that part too many times..#his poor throat……….#george rexstrew#edwin#edwin payne#dead boy detectives#dead boy detectives spoilers
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re: that HEFTY siffrin sweep on id5’s isat favourite blorbos poll — this might sound silly but i do actually think it’s kinda fascinating that isat, as a game so inseparably steeped in (for lack of a better way to describe it) queer fandom culture, managed to so completely sidestep the common Fandom Phenomenon that i suspect was behind the poll in the first place by creating a main character that is also overwhelmingly the fan favourite character for once.
obviously there are any number of factors we could point at to explain the extent to which siffrin nomiddlenames nolastnames manages to grab people and absolutely not let go, but personally i think one of the most interesting ones to consider is the one specific to the medium — that is, how siffrin subverts the “silent blank slate video game protagonist” archetype in such a way that happens to be primo brainrot breeding grounds.
like, when a video game dev makes a silent protagonist it’s usually a bid to maximize immersion by closing the aesthetic distance between player and character as much as possible, right? which is especially true of rpg video games — players find connection in the generic, as that is what gives you the freedom of motion to insert yourself into the story in whatever unique shape suits you best. you are your character and your character is you.
(as ever, post ran long. yall know the drill. tossin in a quick header pic before thoughts on blank slates & blorboification continue under the cut)
and then you’ve got siffrin, who is expressly pointed out to be the taciturn type; who when initially giving the player exposition about their journey so far doesn’t seem to hint at a life or history or even really any motivations outside the journey; whose every thought and action is narrated in second person so as to keep tracing and re-tracing the connection between him and you.
even their design — all darkless and shapeless, bundled up in that big cloak, as if an invitation for you to fill it in with whatever lets you relate to them most! at this point they are their own character for sure, but they also have enough very clear parallels going on with the silent protagonist archetype to feel more than accidental.
of course, as you keep playing you start to recognize that his blankness is much, much more than just a grab at immersion; his apparent lack of backstory, itself a fundamental piece of backstory. this is where he flips dramatically in the player’s perception from “generic vessel for story delivery” to “thoroughly multidimensional character trapped within endless torment nexus custom-built to target and exacerbate all his very specific worst traits rooted in very specific traumas”.
yknow, the good stuff !
but by then you have also been playing enough to be feeling the effects of the thing isat’s design does best of all. i’m talkin bout that ludonarrative lockstep baby. every piece of isat’s gameplay is designed to make you feel what siffrin is feeling — you understand by now that he is not a stand-in for you, but all the same you share in his frustration, his grief, his rare moments of joy and the subsequent heart-in-your-shoes devastation when that joy is inevitably poisoned — and through it all, the desperate grasping for anything new — all as if they were every bit your own.
so in this way the connection is maintained, even if you were someone for whom siffrin’s particular traits & struggles might not otherwise cause you relate to them at all if you had encountered them elsewhere, in a setting where you weren’t actively controlling them as a player. siffrin still gets to carry all the “just like me fr” impact of the blank slate protagonist in the tropes he embodies and in the game mechanics’ design, while totally free to evolve completely into his own character and keep you relating to closely them all the same. now toss back in the fact that said traits & struggles very much ARE of a flavour that a great many people Would Tend To Relate To and just like that you’ve got a perfect storm cookin.
too individual and compellingly written to be an empty vessel for plot delivery. too closely connected with the player’s emotional state to be a story observed impassively from the outside. he has 92 mental illnesses and for the low low price of free u can give him yours to carry too. nobody is doin it like him. congratulations on your well-deserved nose sniffrin nomiddlenames nolastnames <3
#isat#in stars and time#isat spoilers#isat siffrin#sniffrin#been trying to write this post for the past two days straight but it kept escaping me for some reason#luckily we got trapped in airport hell round 2 and apparently there’s just something about these spaces that gets the post juice flowing#& i wanted to be rid of it#shrug#i don’t think i’ve necessarily vocalized much that’s really new here but sniffrin poll just has me thinkinnnnn#also i am making an active effort to not apologize for writing words on the Writing Words website. thank u for ur understanding mwah#atlasisms
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May your hardened heart be woken By the soft and distant song Of all you left here unspoken All the shards we keep stepping on - Take this body home Take this body home Call the wind, and let her know Take this life outgrown Take this broken soul Call the stars, call them all And take it high, take it far, take it home
#svsss#luo binghe#shen qingqiu#bingqiu#sqq#lbh#scum villain#heard the song Take This Body Home by Rose Betts and it nearly took me out at the knees#it really really suits sqq's self-detonation in hua yue city right? i'm not the only one feeling this?#considered adding some literal shards for them to be stepping on - since sqq's sword explodes - but i couldn't quite make it work#anyway this has been playing like a music video in my head for the past couple days highly recommend listening to the song#if you haven't heard it before#can't get over the absolute dissonance between how sqq views this scene and how everyone else must feel about it#like to him he's just completing his plan - hopefully keeping lbh from destroying a city with energy imbalance and escaping The Plot#nbd! he and sqh have planned it all out it's FINE :) off he goes!#meanwhile everyone who loves him - including lbh who worked years to get back to him and is trying to work through a lot of grief#and resentment and doubt and longing and... - watches him DIE in FRONT OF THEM#just collapse while coughing up blood sword disintegrating energy completely consumed#like holy hell sqq could you traumatize the people around you any more???#no wonder lbh went a little bit crazy after that like my man was already not in a great place but what the fuck#lbh watches his shizun presumably sacrifice himself for him ONCE AGAIN like after he's finally Gotten Strong his shizun is STILL#coming to harm in an effort to make up for his shortcomings#my art#most of the time out here drawing what amounts to muppets and then sometimes i get the urge for this and just need to cover everyone in blo
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Unmasked Spy just bc yes
I'm going to eat him right now
Btw surely the watch and the ring are not even on the correct hand but I am too lazy and dyslexic to correct it, so don't pay attention to it
#tf2#team fortress 2#my art#tf2 spy#fanart#spy#im gay as hell#I love this man too much#idk#There is no reason for the injuries I just think it would look badass#How we spy mains feel after escaping a compromising situation with the clock
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im going insane. heres the cyclical hell that i think apollo justice is caught in
#ace attorney#apollo justice#this is just from my observation#i think the rule is that he can never escape until he dies so next time he appears in a game he needs to keep this up#and or get murdered. like that comedic post about aa7 from a few months ago#apollo justice cyclical hell theory
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THEY ARE SO INSUFFERABLE AND HORRIFIC AND AWFUL BUT SO AMAZING AND DORKY AND THIS PART IS SO UNFAIRLY FUNNY AND CUTE AND WHOLESOME-- PLEASE, PLEASE HAVE MORE SCREENTIME IN S2. PLEASE LET THEM TAKE OVER THE SHOW. I KNOW THEY'RE HORRIBLE PEOPLE BUT I NEED MORE OF THE VEES.
And the most important scene of them all (to me):
First of all, how is Vox doing that. Second, you just know that these two douchebags are going to bang so hard with Alastor getting his ass kicked replaying in the background after this. I hate them so much.
#hazbin hotel#hazbin hotel vox#hazbin hotel valentino#hazbin hotel velvette#hazbin hotel vees#voxval#staticmoth#all their scenes in this episode were so freaking good holy shit#all their scenes in show are great actually#like-- oh my god#they are so much fun to have around#vox was literally me the entire time (minus the alastor hating)#and their evil little happy celebrating at the end was so cute it's unreal#i wanted the vees to sing together at some point and i'm so happy it was delivered vox and val sound fantastic together#and that sneaky staticmoth kiss at the end YES YES YES YEEESS#i love everyone in this show (except adam) but the vees are just built different#with adam dead can they please appear more? please? i need more of these disgusting assholes committing disgusting crimes and gay wrongs#''the future of hell belongs to the vees'' is a sentiment i can and will get behind please take over#i just finished the season finale and it gave me the dopamine rush i really needed today i'm so happy AAHHHHHH#i can't stop rewatching this scene someone please help me i can't escape their clutches i've been here for hours please#ok i'm clogging these tags so i'm stopping here but AAGHHHBKFGXGGGBB#anyways good night
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St. Hilarion's ghost story
#payneland#edwin x charles#dead boy detectives#dbda#pre canon angst brought to you by the weirdo who's always drawing post canon fluff#something about oral tradition and old timey slang#i took quite a lot of decisions with this one so buckle up#first of all the female ghost keeps edwin's eyes color because there's still some truth to the legend#the background is the same shade of green to reference hell#just like it is when he's having his flashback#alive charles is dressed all in black because he's not a happy boy#i also made it so that he grips his clothes when his mate punches him even as it's intended to be friendly#because well#these people will end up killing him so it's less friendly when you remember THAT#charles obviously doesn't mean anything by the mary ann comment#he doesn't know the slang meaning and just blurted out what he remembered from the legend#he will find out reach some conclussions and go punch a wall about it probably#about edwin tho his escape is still very recent and he didn't expect this#but even so early on he knows charles means no harm and allows himself to be comforted#it wasn't intentional but hey edwin shruggin off charles' touch is a good parallel to that one scene after charles “kills” the night nurse
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Edwin, coming back from Hell: Is this the real life?
Charles, dying in the corner:
Charles, also a Queen fan: Is this just fantasy?
#i mean if i saw a ghost appear outta a portal from hell that would be one... hell of a fantasy#is this the real life#is this just fantasy#caught in a landslide no escape from reality#i could go on for hours just in a loop#paynland#payneland#edwin payne#charles rowland#edwin x charles#charles x edwin#dbda#dead boy detectives#dead boy detective agency#queen band#queen
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#real#girlblogging#girlblogger#girly things#gaslight gatekeep girlboss#female hysteria#whisper girl#femcel#girlboss#lana del rey#female manipulator#this is what makes us girls#escapism#existentialism#female rage#my year of rest and relaxation#born to die#childhood trauma#hell is a teenage girl#just girly things#the feminine urge#the bell jar#the virgin suicides#tumblr girl#tw depressing stuff#tw depressing thoughts#tw depressive#mentally unstable#mental illness#actually mentally ill
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Charles' thing is that he wants to feel alive and that's part of the reason why he decided to never move on to the afterlife right? Meanwhile Edwin thinks Charles will move on and that he'll be alone again because 'he isn't good with people'.
But then when the Night Nurse shows up a second time Charles is ready to go wherever -including Hell- as long as Edwin shouldn't have to go back there, meanwhile Edwin refuses that they be split up, and both are okay with being sent together to the Lost and Found Department to be sorted out later as long as they're together-
#does this make sense#like#charles -> stay on earth#then charles is like -> fuck earth edwin n°1#edwin -> stay out of hell and wander alone ig#then edwin -> stay with charles#although you can argue that charles wanted to stick around the one dude that was nice to him since the start but like#idk how to explain it#he'd rather argue for edwin's case than argue to stay on earth#edwin not going back to hell is his main goal in the discussion#meanwhile edwin's goal is that they stay together + that he doesn't go back to hell#i do wonder what it would've looked like if they'd gone to the lost and found department#do they try to escape it#does charles find out where he was headed#anyways another day of being very normal about this show#dead boy detectives#charles rowland#edwin payne#paynland#payneland#i know that charles' whole motivation isn't just that he wishes he were still alive and that he wish he hadn't had his life stolen from him#but my thoughts are not coherent enough for any type of deep character analysis essay and i would probably mischaracterize him horribly#wonder what was edwin's plan when he came out of hell cuz he went back to his highschool so was he just doing a bit of visiting#“oh hello place where i died”
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#coquette angel#im just a girl#just girly things#gaslight gatekeep girlblog#girlblogger#coquette dollete#girlblogging#this is a girlblog#cinnamon girl#hell is a teenage girl#this is what makes us girls#female hysteria#coquette#girlblog#girlcore#lana del ray aka lizzy grant#pink#dollette#escaping reality#female rage#manic pixie dream girl#girl interupted syndrome#girlhood#whisper girl#girl rotting#devine feminine#older man younger woman#im literally just a girl#pink angel core#lizzy grant aka lana del rey
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