#they dont rly like each other. they dont even /know/ each other. but theyre also kinda all the other has?
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unfortunately, it was inevitable for my ghostie to marry their brainwashed stalker, but they're still making it a punishment for him.
(ya might be wondering damn what makes someone inflict poor edward on themself? well, to put it simply. you take what you get)
for starters, this ⬇ was the first dream i came across after my 8 year hiatus.
so i was like, oh, ok. love? what love?
guess chasing love is a main theme for them now. good luck rei. you woke up alone, and you have no family whatsoever. you certainly don't care about that right now, but you will, your ambition will make sure of that.
cue a string of unsuccessful crushes/love interests that were either using them, only interested on something they owned, or just. straight up made their heart skip several beats and then left. (i was also focusing on LF so hard i skipped on acquaintances, and didnt start/continue MYN and other storylines that could've given them possible npc friends/platonic interests. i also thought the bewildering procession needed 125 base persuasive, which i didnt have at the time)
i feel like if they had one (1) meaningful connection that wasn't scheduled to move on without them by the end of the ambition, if there was one (1!!) person they felt would consider sticking around by their side. edward would be deadward. 100%.
but they didn't
they didn't have anyone.
this blond weirdo was the only person that would stay by their side no matter what, at least for a while, and that was only because he had no actual choice in the matter.
this marriage represents reisz giving up on chasing love. pure and simple. after months of having people to come back to they'd be left with nothing. truth or not, this was the mindspace they were in. they were just. so tired
so yeah how could they possibly not take this opportunity to assure there would be at least someone out there waiting for them. that might as well have been the only chance they'd ever get to walk down an aisle anyway.
#the reason theyre 'together' might be based on pure angst but the actual dynamic in my head is more like a dark comedy sitcom ngl.#they dont rly like each other. they dont even /know/ each other. but theyre also kinda all the other has?#there was no honeymoon. theres barely any intimacy(tm). specifically bc reisz doesnt want to give edward what he wants.#but sometimes. they take off the things that cover their faces and sleep sharing a bed in the most absolute but comfortable silence#which in a way is absurdly intimate#theyll both prob die with this one weird unspoken thing never resolved idk yet. juicy either way. my touys#fallen london#fallen london oc#nightmarriage#poor edward#the twilight phantom#chaindoodles#light fingers spoilers
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they should get to kill each other at least twice .i think
#gravity falls#stanford pines#stanley pines#lg doodles#i drew this a few days ago but im so tired after work ngl . sittingnin bed like =__= ..#and im visiting family this weekend so idek if ill get to it until next weekend#but ya i love them i loge them so much#i love the tension in atots right after stanford comes back#and hes like writing sll this shit ab stan in the journal#while learning that he stole his identity and so on and stans like hey so i did this rly selfless thing for u can you at least#acknowledge it and they r just stewing in their own anger 😭#actually i love their dynamic so much . the arguing as they mimic each other 1:1 and rhe animosity and#ykw im gna make another post but the grammar stanley scene is my favorite#magbe its not post worthy nvm idc but thats probably one of my fav interactions in the whole series#its so stupid that u know its real HELPPlike yeah that rly isnjust how it is . in fact ive done more over less 🫶#HAHAHAHAH#ugh.love . lovee i wish#i dont think gf needs a continuation im totally in the 2 season boat here#but if they ever did a post series stan and ford exploration ohhh believe . trust tht i would not shut up ab it ever#i want to see them talk so bad . im so greedy bc i feel like they didnt talk enough in the series bc im partial 2 them i just want them in#everything .#i think their personalities are so fun esp bc ford isnt the annoying nerd archetype i like that hes a cocky bitch#and i like that stan is an equally cocky bitch and they both have too much pride that they butt heads over literally everythjng#but they also recognize how ridiculous it all is like 😭. even when theyre fighting over the journal they both r like ok pause r u ok#hmm.. so many ppl here capture their dynamic well too.😭at least the people who dont generalize either into a single personality trait yk#imso tired im tired#but guys i love talking ab ford and stan theybr so everything to me in ways i dnt think incould ever articulate like u see them and u just g#get it . ugh. turning my head and passing out . ford is so funny hes so stupid i love him i cant bekieve i was a ford hater im sorry ive#atoned im changed im a changed oerson i didnt realize the magnitude of his serve .but stanley as my day 1 will never change . just know .(k#idk if anyonf ever reads this fsr down but if u r here say cheesee📸📸
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this tagline...T_^ thinks about how main story alrdy referenced other timelines such as boundary power captain & like all of the events currently on the anni page? isnt only the sara & cagliostro events missing? along with all the different jobs, like its ssooo cheesy but i alrdy rly loved that they rly do lean into the timeline thing with 'everyone experiences granblue differently', so seeing this...regardless of the intention of it
#stardust speaking !#gbf spoilers//#I THINK...gbf is such a lovely game. and i think its perfectly fine to only enjoy the parts u want in what capacity u want#when they first mentioned timelines i was Very concerned<3 but? with the way theyre doing it..................im very fond of it#im keeping track of food rn so i cant rly have the focus to put together my words like i want to#but i think saying 'u can experience gbf in ur own way' along with how they already handle events (even if at this point u often have to#accept the narrative that these ppl know each other (even if they often Are introduced within the event/story#so i feel...? its ok. probably. im not new anymore. but also having the tab on the preview page#that says 'hey these are the related events + characters' has been such a lovely change too#even on the anni page directly linking the imprtant chs?!?!? i think its cool! like! i would nvr look thro all that as a new plyr but!#i like it#anyway having 'soar to the cosmos' when cosmos isnt there on the page is a crime#like i dont supercare but i also do think its hilarious LOL
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Bwoahh thank you for the lore. It’s really interesting to see the spectrum of views towards humans. Their feelings are so different yet they’re so similar (like night and day lmao) . Rip Goddess of Earth for having to deal with those two for a millennia. Love to hear more about these two <3
— Penalanon
Aaaaaahh yes!!! That's my main intention with my god ocs tbh. Two things: what is their view towards humans(A), and what governing style do they believe is most effective(B)? And I guess also to an extent, how do they feel about interplanetary relations, but that's a bit too meta 😭 I just think Luna and Sola are an interesting case study because they're so uninvolved compared to all the others. But yeah 😭 they are so similar, but ofc they'll never see it. I like to think they're both fascinated but one is like this 😍 and the other is like this 😟
But here I will give you the thoughts of some other gods regarding the two things I mentioned earlier, bcs I think it's a fun thing to play with. At some point I'll have to make a chart like the political compass one about this lol.
Earth(Eden)
A: They're creatures of the land with their own autonomy and goals
B: I will not interfere, it is also my duty to observe and come in only when really, truly needed(read: never.)
Saturn(Sabah):
A: They're like toys I can play with and manipulate.
B: Proxy wars are fun! I love anarchy and chaos! I will play to each side at will, and switch whenever it gets boring.
Neptune(Nikola):
A: They're my citizens whom I govern and watch over. I love to see their creations, its interesting to see what they come up with!
B: I am like a monarch, I can carry out my will through the people if need be but I don't micromanage them.
Uranus(Ustinya)
A: They are like my children, even if I don't understand them all the time, I still care for them and watch over them.
B: I am like a figurehead and advisor. I won't get involved too much unnecessarily, but I am honored they look to me for guidance, advice and encouragement.
There's others but these are the ones that came to mind first so :D I feel like most of them are pretty rational...and then there's Sabah 😭 I need to make more of them a bit evil I think
#theres so much meta 😭😭 that i domt even know if i wanna get into it#but i guess i like viewing them somewhat as political leaders#or in the view of politics#bcs that is what im into :)#also theyre like typical omniscient and omnipresent gods#but usually tend to have a human form in one place#people can pray to them and they might help them. depending on their ruling style#but they can also go in person#the prayer stuff is more like. pregnancy and personal matters#and going in person is more political kind of things#also there could be so much said about how they view each other#a lot dont like Eden bcs they see her as irresponsible and negligent#and she sees them as cruel overlords who over reach severely#and of course everyone just hates sabah#cause they cant rly interfere but have to watch from afar like wth is going on over there#poor Ustinya having Saturn right next to her :( considering her views#she might be my favorite dhfjgk#i love her bcs shes super cold and distant seeming like very serious and above it all#but she truly loves them just doesnt understand human things no matter how much she tries#ANYWAYS#lore stuff yeah :)#oh yeah also dw about how the other planets are habitable dhfjkgkg#they just are.#its mostly by virtue of the gods bodies being the celestial bodies#so they make it work ykno#functionally they're all just earth tbh. maybe just variances in size#i think they probably can portray things a certain way to the people like ooo heres how space works btw#<- like our science but in reality its actually just above human limits of understanding#also all the moons are helpers :) and have their own stuff going on#catie.asks.
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"Hachi —"
"He didn't tell me. Not exactly. But he —" Jinbei's voice falters, and Nami fights to keep her shoulders squared and her expression smooth, when he says, "— he warned me, about the kinds of things I might do that he felt might...be upsetting to you. So that I could avoid those behaviors."
Some part of Nami's heart breaks, and she smiles, faint and almost sharp, at the idea of Hatchan trying to protect her in this small, simple way. It's kind, but it's something else, too. "And based on what he said, you've...guessed."
He doesn't pretend otherwise, and she appreciates it. "Yes. Not the finer details, but...some of it."
She sits, body suddenly feeling heavy, and sinks into one of the room's plush seats. It's quiet, in the library. Just her and their newest crew member, who she does not fear. Who she does not fear. But her body remembers. Suddenly she can do little else. "What did he say?"
Jinbei would clearly rather not say, but he sits, too, and respects her too much to lie or evade. "He said it might make you uncomfortable to see me using a firearm." Her mind fills with images and sounds, the bang of a gunshot / the sight of her mothers skull exploding, viscera falling out like a spilled bowl / Nojiko's scream. "He told me to let you eat first, before myself, if there was ever a situation where we needed to eat in turns." It's been years since she's been forced to skip a meal, either because her captors decided she wasn't worthy of food or because spending even a cent on a meal was selfish, but she remembers the clutching, devouring hunger and the way her ribs felt against her skin nevertheless. "He though it would be best if I avoided waking you at night if there was any other option." His voice twists, and she doesn't have it in her to wonder what he's imagining. The first six months were the hardest, as far as sleep goes, never being allowed more than a few hours at a time because Arlong wanted to break her circadian rhythm, forcing her up at random to redo maps she knew were perfect. The years after, when she'd wake screaming and be beat for causing such a racket, and the way now she can't scream when she wakes up at all.
She swallows thickly, does not try to force the memories away, does try not to let them settle.
"Was that all?" Nami asks, her voice stronger than she feels.
"And he...suggested I shouldn't come near you generally while you're working on maps."
That has her stiffening. A too - large hand against her skull, slamming her face to her work table, smearing wet ink on her cheeks and blooming bruises beneath it. The memories always float closest to the surface when she draws maps, and that makes her so fucking angry she still wants to scream some days, because drawing maps is her passion. She loves little more. And he took it from her, transformed the simple, warm joy into a source of fear and anger. It's hers, now, but it isn't just her body that he left scarred. It's her dream. Every day, the scars fade, and she believes that someday, it'll be all hers again, but that she has a scar to heal at all is all wrong.
"Hah. That was kind of him." Her hand raises, pressing idly to her tattoo and the jagged scar beneath it. "I kind of hate how weak it makes me seem, though. That he thinks you need to walk on eggshells around me, just because Arlong hurt me."
"Not weak," Jinbei says. "I know that you're the farthest thing from weak."
Nami smiles, not looking at him, and tries to remember that he's right. "I want to tell you about it. Everything that happened." Hatchan was being kind, to tell him this. Nojiko was being kind, when she told Sanji and Usopp. She understands. But it's not their story to share. "I want you to know, and I want you to hear it from me."
He stiffens, and she can tell even without looking at him by the way his breath skips. Fishmen and humans breathe differently. She knows that, too. She imagines hearing a fishman's breath at her back while she draws a map, and is forced to consider that at least one piece of Hachi's advisements may be wise. Jinbei nods and says, "Of course."
"I'm not telling you to hurt you. This crew is like a family to me, and that means you, too. I want everything to be out on the table between us." She looks at him, still smiling, tired but not lying. "And I think we both need the reminder that we're strong enough to bear the truth."
Jinbei smiles, too, and nods again. Nami inhales.
"The reason Hachi probably thought it might upset me if I saw you with a gun — the first thing Arlong did to me was invade my village when I was ten. He took it over, and demanded tribute from everyone. My mother, she — she only had enough money for herself or for my sister and I, and she chose to save us. Arlong — he shot her in the head in front of us." She's surprised at how even her voice is, even while he heart breaks at the memory. She'd tried to help Bellemere after; tiny, trembling hands reaching as though she could put her brains back in her skull, and Nojiko had held her back. Jinbei looks, again, like he may cry, and Nami feels herself grow more tired.
He starts, "I'm so —"
"No," she says. "Don't. It's not your fault. I don't blame you. You've apologized already, and I accepted it. You're not your brother, and I know that. Seeing you with a gun wouldn't scare me, because I know you're not like him."
Jinbei nods, lips thin. Nami looks back to the half - finished map resting on her work table. It's nice, that she can take breaks whenever she wants now. She lets her eyes rest there.
"After he killed my mother, he found a map I'd drawn. I don't remember what I said, but I must have gotten mad at him for touching it or something, because he realized I drew it. Even back then, I was good at it, and Arlong took me away. A man in the vilage who cared about me — he's like a father to me — tried to stop him from taking me, and he was...he got hurt, real badly for it. He almost died."
She doesn't look back at Jinbei. She thinks of Genzo's voice, ragged, barely - there, soaked with blood, I'll save you, Nami. She thinks of screaming, begging him to abandon her. It took her so long after to learn that she was allowed to let others protect her, that she doesn't get everyone who loves her hurt.
"Once he took me away, Arlong beat me and made me watch him sink the Navy ships that came close. I didn't understand what he wanted, but...he was just trying to prove to me that I was alone. That help wasn't coming. He said I could join his crew as their cartographer. I —" Her voice breaks, just barely, as she remembers the little girl, so scared, so small, who'd had to be so, so brave. She wishes she could hold her. She wishes she could tell her that it would be okay someday. "I told him I'd only work for him if he'd let me buy the village back from him someday. And he agreed."
"He did?" Jinbei sounds sincerely surprised, and Nami laughs weakly, eyes drifting to her knees.
"He did. I'd just have to earn one hundred million berries for him, and I'd have the town's freedom. And my own."
"One hundred —"
"I was still a little girl, so I — I didn't really understand just how big that number was. But I didn't...there wasn't any choice. I d - didn't see any other choice. No one was coming to save us. Either I protected the village, or...or they'd all die, like my mom did." She inhales raggedly. "It was all I could do."
"I'm sorry," he says again, and her head snaps to him but before she can tell him to stop, he says, "I'm not taking responsibility. But I am sorry that happened. That shouldn't have...no child should ever be put in that position."
He's right. Nami smiles, and allows herself a few tears. All of the others said the same, when she'd told them. It's a good reminder, that her pain was as horrible and wrong as it had felt. As it still feels, on the worst days.
"Anyway, I ended up working for him. It was more like I was his prisoner than a member of the crew. He gave me a tattoo on my arm of his Jolly Roger, like — hah, well. I guess like a brand." Jinbei's face twists, a mixture of guilt and fury, and she thinks of Fisher Tiger's last words and understands, at least a little. "He was...awful to me. Almost the whole crew was. I went without food a lot. I got beat a lot. He didn't let me sleep enough or eat enough, and he almost killed me more times than I can count. I think he expected me to die. I think he wanted me to." It hadn't felt like an option to her. She was all that stood between Arlong and the village. "He let me stop wearing chains when I turned twelve. A birthday present." Jinbei's expression contorts further. She reaches out her free hand, hesitates, and then commits, resting it over his. His eyes widen as his head snaps towards the contact, then towards her face.
She smiles, trying to comfort them both. This aches, but she's told the story to the others enough that at least the wound isn't new. The hurt is like a stone, stuck in the center of her chest — whenever she tells someone, it feels like chipping away at it.
"He was...exacting about his maps. He locked me in a little room for a long time, didn't let me see any other humans for years. It was just work and maps and getting hurt whenever I tried to rest. I couldn't breathe. When he finally started letting me leave the island, I started stealing from — anywhere. Anything I could get my hands, to save the money to buy the island. Eventually, I started stealing from pirates."
Nojiko's horror, the first time she came home, blood dripping from her mouth and wounds across her arms and chest. Who cares that I'm hurt, I got ten thousand berries right here!
It's easier, to tell this part of the story.
"They hurt me, too, but...honestly, it was still better than being at Arlong Park. Nothing that any of them did to me could match what Arlong did." She inhales slow, exhales slower. Jinbei moves his hand beneath hers slowly, so as to not startle her, and flips it so her hand rests in his wide palm. She doesn't flinch, when he curls his hand gently around hers. "That was...my whole life. For eight years."
The number seems to wound him, and his eyes lower. Nami breathes, but does not stop. She must not believe herself fragile. She must not believe him fragile, either. "I had saved a lot over the years. Arlong figured out how close I was, and he had one of the Navy fuckers he was paying off steal my stash, so that I was back to square one. They shot my sister — she lived, thank god." She'd been so scared, mind conjuring images of Belle - mere's blood in the grass, another person dead because of Nami. "I — the villagers were so angry at Arlong, and so angry on my behalf, that they...they decided they'd rather die fighting Arlong and his men than live another day like this. I tried to convince them I could just...earn the money again, but..."
Inhale. Exhale. This part is hard. It had been so strange, to go from universally despised to so, so loved, and all in a matter of hours. To know that she was going to lose the people who loved her again. "The village loved me, even if I didn't know it. They wouldn't let Arlong get away with hurting me like that, and I think they...they thought that if they died, at least I'd finally be able to escape. I wouldn't have anybody left to save except myself." Her smile turns bitter. "Idiots. At that point, I'd have just died, too."
Her hand against her scar finally falls, and Jinbei's eyes fall to the exposed flesh. The scar is audacious and ugly, but it's mostly covered by the pinwheel. He seems to only now realize how extreme the wound is. "I was so angry at him, and so scared for my family, and so sick of — of having his mark on my body, this reminder that it wasn't really my body, just his tool, and I just — I snapped. I basically tried to carve his brand off of me." Jinbei winces, eyes shining, teeth gritting. There is no fear in her that the anger he expresses is aimed at her. "It's a miracle I can still use my arm at all, honestly. Luffy found me like that, and he didn't even know the story, he just...hated seeing me suffering like that. He and the others marched off to Arlong Park. And against all odds...they won. Luffy, he — he destroyed the room Arlong kept me in, destroyed all the maps I'd drawn in captivity. Destroyed everything connected to — what Arlong did to me. After that, after all that pain, I was...finally free."
Jinbei is silent for a long, long time. Nami doesn't rush him. She needs the quiet to swallow her tears, to let the memories wash through her and leave without drowning her. Fishmen hands feel different than human hands, but she's glad that holding Jinbei's hand doesn't chafe. It feels comforting. It feels kind.
Finally, the fishman says, "how long ago were you freed?"
Nami breathes out. "Almost three years ago."
"Three years of freedom after eight years of captivity and abuse from my brother. I don't fault you for being uncomfortable around me."
"Hey, stop that," Nami commands. "Listen. I'm not uncomfortable around you. We're holding hands now, and all that makes me feel is safe." Jinbei's eyes widen, head raising to look at her face. Her lips are set in a stern line, shoulders strong. "I'm not saying that there won't be bad days where I might jump when you greet me or something or feel anxious drawing my maps around you or the memories might make things hard. But it's not about you or about you letting Arlong go. I get that way about Sanji or Brook or the others sometimes, too." He doesn't look entirely convinced, but he squeezes her hand like he wants to be. "It's not about you. It's just the memories. We've both suffered a lot because of each other's people. But I don't blame you, and I know you don't blame me. There's no part of me, not a single one, that believes you'd ever hurt me the way Arlong did." Jinbei's eyes widen and shine and hurt. Softer, she adds, "There's no part of me that believes you'd ever hurt me at all."
The older man's voice trembles, breaking like the tears flowing from his eyes, when he says, "You are — far kinder than I deserve, and unimaginably brave." She smiles again, helpless this time, as she feels her own eyes begin to well again.
"Now you know my whole story. Thank you for letting me tell you."
"I'm a part of the crew," he says, still crying, but his voice is steadying. She thinks of the singular time she'd caught Arlong crying. He'd beat her for daring to see his fear and pain, and she knows that Jinbei is much stronger than him in many ways, that he is not afraid to allow himself to feel and cry and grieve. She is, too. "You said it yourself. This crew is like family, and there shouldn't be secrets." He breathes out a stuttering laugh, his tears slowing. "It's a bit strange to adjust to how close you are all."
"Give it a month or two," Nami shoots back, teasing a little now. "Luffy will have you so overwhelmed by how stupid we all are that you'll have no choice but to adjust."
"I hope to learn from all of you," he says, free hand wiping at his eyes. She releases his palm, and the other presses to his chest, and to the symbol that had frightened her in the early days "I hope that someday I may possess a fraction of your strength, Nami."
That draws a laugh from her, startled and shy. "The others on the crew are much strong than me."
"I don't believe that," he says, and he means it. He does. Her heart feels — light and heavy both. Floating on saltwater. She is strong, she knows. "To be strong enough not only to endure that hardship, but to have coped and moved on to the extent that you have...to be honest, I envy you. Arlong hurt you far more than he did me, and yet...the strength you display with regards to him is not something I can ever hope to match."
Her brow furrows. "He was your brother. He is your brother. That doesn't excuse him, and I'll always hate him for what he did to me. But it's a hell of lot easier to move on from a villain you hurt you than from the brother that you love."
Jinbei smiles joylessly. "Strange that the same man can be both, isn't it?"
She doesn't have a reply to that. All she can say, after a long moment of silence, is, "you're strong, too." To take responsibility for what is only barely his fault, to cry to a human even though humans have hurt him, to hold the love and the hate for Arlong together in his heart and not fall apart with it.
Jinbei smiles, not looking convinced, but doesn't argue.
"Do you want to — stay with me?" Nami asks suddenly. "While I finish this map?"
His eyes widen. "Are you sure you'd be comfortable with that?"
His concern isn't unwarranted. This conversation has memories bubbling to the surface, pressing against her head — Belle - mere, pain, years of abuse. The time Arlong drowned her and then crushed her hands. A fishman's breathing near her while she draws maps. It might be hard, but — "I'm strong," she says, because she needs to. "And I think I need..." She exhales, trying to think of how to word it. "I used to be afraid of pirates, you know? Much more than I was afraid of fishmen. When I started traveling with Luffy, I was terrified of him. But every day when none of them hurt me, the fear got...smaller. The memories of my crew being good to me drowned out the memories of the crew that hurt me. And I think...I think I need memories of maps and fishmen that are safe, too. To drown out the memories that aren't." She laughs quietly. "I guess I'm being selfish."
Jinbei smiles, almost paternal, eyes still red from his tears. "I think that makes perfect sense. I'd be happy to keep you company."
Nami grins. She's sure it might ache. But she's sure, too, that he won't hurt her. Even now, years later, what a relief — to know her crew won't ever hurt her.
"Thank you."
#drabbles.#just thinking abt nami telling jinbei abt everything yknow......and i think nami deserves 2 be the one to tell this story#its always been somebody else doing it for her#abuse /#violence /#gore /#i dont rly know how to tag it but theres also a very brief moment that implies that jinbei might#(incorrectly) be guessing that nami experienced csa#its brief and only a quick vague suggestion but i wanted 2 mention it even so!#anyway god i love them. i love them.#theyre so good. i love them. i love the idea of jinbei getting almost a little paternal abt her#like both of them fully loving each other despite the trauma; namis trauma w his brother#and jinbeis trauma w humans#they are both so strong and my mipys#I LOVE U JINBEI IM UR BIGGEST FAN !!!!#personal blogs i am literally BEGGING U not to touch this. literally begging
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yeonjun nsfw alphabet
cw: lots of afab!reader but no gender stated!
a = aftercare (what they’re like after sex)
runs u a nice bath— most of the time w him bathing w u bc of ur insistence; words of praise, crinkled eyes with gentle smiles as he kisses into ur wet skin hehe
b = body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)
of his i can definitely see it being his mouth, and who wouldn’t b obsessed w lips like that!!!!!!!!!! likes how they look covered in ur lipstick, bruised from kisses, covered in ur cum and everything along that nature<3
on you i think it’d be ur thighs or ur ass, mainly based on how much he gropes his members as is LOL. loves the plush of ur thighs in every position, loves biting and groping at the soft skin and leaving his mark on u <3 thinks theyre especially cute when they tremble when u feel particularly good ^_^
c = cum (anything to do with cum, basically)
lovvvesssssss cumming in u when u’ll let him (read: always) — doesn’t cum a whole lot nor is it thick but he’ll make sure u take every drop until he’s sure u’ll probably have a scare … shrugs …
d = dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)
probably lowk does hope he’ll knock u up even tho u guys r so adamant that ur not ready ٩(^‿^)۶
e = experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)
a little experienced maybe but doesn’t necessarily transfer every detail to his next partner if that makes sense? he knows generally not everyone feels pleasure the same ways and at the same levels so while he thinks he knows what hes doing he likes the confirmation and a little guidance where necessary bc he rly wants it to be good for u
f = favourite position (this goes without saying)
missionary w ur thighs over his hips … what more can i say
g = goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)
definitely likes to joke around, he can be serious if u really want that but if u want him as he is hes gonna be giggling and smiling bc he just loves u so much he cant believe he gets to have u like this!!!!!!! probably gets more serious the closer he is to cumming hehe can’t hold himself together long enough to even try giggling <3
h = hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)
well groomed id say he cares abt his appearance but not to the point where hes completely bare i dont think , just well kept ! :]
i = intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)
hes romantic in the aspect of making u feel comfortable w him, like w the answer for G i think he can be quite silly during but thats what makes it more intimate bc its u two getting to know each others bodies best!!! just loving on each other, holding each other close and giggling into each others mouths which occasionally breaks off into pretty moans
j = jack off (masturbation headcanon)
loves to send u videos of himself jerking off imo !!!!! if hes not filming it for u i cant imagine he cares much for getting off by himself at all anymore whats the point of that!!!!!
k = kink (one or more of their kinks)
hmmmmmm said it before but spit is a big one for him i think !! drooly kisses, calling u his good baby when he spits in ur mouth, spitting on ur cunt before he fucks u open w his tongue and fingers … the possibilities r simply endless !
l = location (favorite places to do the do)
probably likes a little thrill, semi public spaces and such where its not THAT likely someone will find/hear u but just a sliver of a chance perhaps ฅ/ᐠ. ̫ .ᐟ\ฅ bathroom at a party or smth is probably the riskiest he’ll go <3 otherwise just either of ur homes is the way to go !!
m = motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)
literally almost anything abt u but especially i think any glimpses he would get of ur hips or thighs during the day would make him froth a little and he starts to think more abt those thighs on either sides of his head— all thoughts out of his own perverse nature
n = no (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)
as much as theres a general hc i cant see him as a hard mean dom but that could just b me and to each their own!!! he’s realistically too much of a sweetheart so the idea of being especially mean to u ever even if its meant to be hot just doesn’t rly quite do it for him but he’s willing to try at least once if thats what u really want
o = oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)
oh hes a GIVER. that boy is a MUNCH!!!!!!!!!!!!!! and hes GOOD AT IT!!!!!!!!!!! the teasing leadup, the way he gives himself into it wholeheartedly, moaning into u like its him getting off… and again! that mouth! case closed!!!!
p = pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)
depends on how pent up he is!!! generally he likes it fast but not too rough, but sometimes he gets worked up enough he’s a little rougher and harder w it, or whenever u want it he’ll get a little rougher !! however u want it, he’s willing to give it to u<3 almost always its sensual tho have u seen his hips :3
q = quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)
would probs love a good quickie but prefers when he has the time to tease u up to ur orgasm, knowing u always come harder w the anticipation and perhaps just a little edging :p
r = risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)
definitely game to experiment especially if theres smth u wanna try and u get so squirmy and heated in the face talking abt it, probably not too risky tho!!! nothing that could seriously hurt u or himself
s = stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)
stamina is pretty criminal, could take u for about 3 rounds before he finally tires out but only for a break, then he’s on u for ur fourth orgasm on his tongue, strong ass jaw workout ill tell u that
t = toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)
YES! vibrators absolutely, nice silk ropes for bondage, pretty glass dildos to use on u, a galore of things he wants to try on you but sometimes he thinks abt you using them on him and gets himself so hard he thinks he could cum in his pants if u so much as kissed him
u = unfair (how much they like to tease)
a LOT !!! but thats all part of his foreplay ur just so easy to rile up and so cute to make squirm under just his fingertips
v = volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)
pretty loud ? but not much and not on purpose, breathless moans that break off into longer pitchier whines when pleasure wracks through his body hehe
w = wild card (a random headcanon for the character)
he’s definitely cum in his pants more than once just from eating u out
x = x-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)
honestly? i think he wouldn’t actually be that big like average or even just a bit below BUT!!! that’s just the thing isn’t it bc size doesn’t matter if u know how to use it! and lord does he!!!!!!!!
y = yearning (how high is their sex drive?)
pretty high, but can u blame him when he has someone as stunning as u to always be his
z = zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)
i don’t think he’d fall asleep fast unless u guys have had Excessive rounds … but anyway defo stays up w ur head pressed to his chest, playing w ur hair and telling u silly stories until u fall asleep first <3
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zl fic idea
hii everyone i wrote something yesterday about an au idea i had for zolu and. i thought i'd share it here since its a bit too messy and disjointed in places to post on like. ao3 or something.
4.7k words, warning for temporary major character death but do not worry all will be fixed in due time. i'll put the rest under the cut
ok i have an idea for an au thats like kind of reincarnation but like reality displacement but like. okay just listen.
so we start at laughtale. its a couple years into the future from where we are in canon the strawhats are achieving their dreams luffy is about to find the one piece theres a big battle happening between them and the blackbeard pirates and whoever the fuck else is there idc. the rest of the strawhats are fighting the bb crew while luffy and zoro head off to find the one piece and also end up fighting black beard himself. luffy and zoro atp r like basically a thing but they never talk about it cuz theyre luffy and zoro and they kind of just exist with each other but like. theyre basically in love and everyone knows it. anyway they go off together luffy has the one piece almost in his grasp blackbeard attacks they fight its a big battle blood is shed bones are broken uumm in my mind luffy and zoro are like teaming up against bb bc his devil fruit is lowk broken and op and like ok theres gear5 too but i didnt rly consider that so lets just assume bb’s devil fruit can negate gear5 somehow or luffy exhausts it before bb is fully defeated.
finally theyre able to knock bb down and hes out and theyre both tired and worn but they DID IT and the one piece is luffys and theyre facing each other grinning ear to ear and zoros saying “you ready, king of the pirates?” and luffy laughs and goes “not just yet zoro, i still gotta-“ and then theres a spear piercing right through his chest. and in the next moment its gone.
theres a gaping hole through his captain and theres blood, theres so much blood and luffy’s still smiling like he hasnt realized it yet, like it hasnt even registered. zoros ears are ringing and he doesnt know what to make of whats hes seeing because its just not real, it CANT be.
he looks over luffy’s shoulder and blackbeard is on the ground with his hand outstretched , black energy coiling back into his form and he’s laughing and laughing with bloodstained teeth. hes fucking laughing. one moment zoro is still standing parallel to luffy and the next hes in front of blackbeard and the mans head is rolling through the dirt and gravel, wado dripping crimson, a terrible gap toothed grin still stretching the man’s cheeks.
zoro is breathing heavy, hes trembling and hes almost mesmerized by the blood pooling around a lacerated neck— then he’s remembering luffy and turning around and calling his name and he can see right through him theres a HOLE right through him and he chokes and stumbles and rushes to his side right as luffy starts to crumple to the floor . catches him and lowers him gently and doesnt know what to say.
hes still shaking but cant move his mouth and everything is muffled, the sounds from the battle outside are distant and they dont matter but what does he do. what does he do.
he snaps out of it when luffy gently calls his name. a strong “zoro,” like hes not fazed at all. like there isnt blood soaking into zoros clothes.
his brain kickstarts and he’s speaking. saying things like “youre ok you’ll be ok” and “choppers right outside i’ll just call him and he’ll fix you right up” and “you always bounce back, right captain?” and hes thinking “dont die please dont fucking die. not now, not when we’re this close please dont fucking die” and hes silently praying to all the gods he doesnt believe in but luffy calls his name again and his mouth clicks shut. luffys saying it’ll be fine, that he had fun. that hes proud to have made it this far with all of them. and those sound a lot like parting words so zoro’s shaking his head no but luffy is still smiling. hes saying that hes glad he had zoro, that he made him happy. hes saying to tell everyone he’s glad they met, that hes glad they all had each other, that he knows theyll be just fine .
zoro wants to say that luffy should tell that to them himself, when hes wrapped up and recovering and alive but his mouth is glued shut again and he feels that interrupting luffy now would be cursing him to death, like his words are the only thing keeping him tethered here, he just needs to get him to keep talking to stay awake.
he tries to smile but it comes out ugly and wrong and he feels his lip wobble so he drops it. he settles on rubbing his thumb on luffys shoulder. something to keep him here.
so he rubs and luffy talks little things until he cant anymore. until his eyes grow dull and his skin loses its warmth and still zoro rubs and he rubs.
—
thats how law finds them. zoro hunched over a body that should never be as still as it is. and its really no surprise hes there, hes been gunning for the one piece since the time he could captain a ship (or a submarine) but it all feels so wrong.
zoro either doesnt notice him or doesnt care, but either way the man doesnt acknowledge law until he’s right behind him. its not like law can say anything to announce himself either, not after seeing the state of the body that zoros currently holding. the body that used to be luffy’s. hes still processing it all when the other man(the one whos alive) finally speaks.
zoro asks if hes got a devil fruit. less of a question and more of a statement, but he should know anyway since theyve spent considerable time together and hes literally seen him use it. law cant unstick his jaw so he hums in affirmation. “and you can switch stuffs’ places?” another hum. “what about time.”
that makes law pause. “what?” his voice comes out stronger than he feels.
“what about time? can you switch things in time?” by this point law has awakened his devil fruit or some shit dont sweat the logistics but hes never tried anything of that sort so he kind of stumbles “im not- maybe? ive never attempted-“ zoro interrupts “send me back”
“what?”
“send me back so i can fix this. you can do that, right.” it clicks. law would pity zoro if he didnt know any better, instead he just feels mounting despair and resignation.
he may not be crew, but he knew luffy too, he was allied with the man for fucks sake, and this just feels- wrong. he sighs, a tired, heavy thing.
“what about your crew?” its useless. zoros as stubborn as his captain, with arguably a handful more screws loose. “it wont matter. they’ll never know because i’ll make sure this doesnt happen.” he still hasnt turned around. law doesnt know what expression hes making and hes sure he never wants to find out.
hes ready to deny it, cut his losses and head for the one piece himself (hes not heartless, but if he stands here any longer and has to look at. well. he think he might never be able to move again) but then he really thinks about it. could he? would it even be possible? surely this isnt the way things were supposed to go, surely this isnt right. luffys never been one who was supposed to die just like that, like this, law knows that much. he thinks hes going to regret this, but he counts it as one last thank you for everything luffy did for him.
youre gonna owe me big time strawhat-ya. if i even remember this, that is.
he puffs a breath “i can try. i cant- promise anything but. i think we both know this,” he makes a vague, weak gesture, “isnt right.”
zoro doesnt say anything, law didnt expect him to. he just bows his head slightly and law takes that as the acknowledgment it is.
he brings his hand up, “dont do anything stupid, zoro-ya. or, at least, make it stupid enough to bring him back.”
he positions his fingers in way so familiar, but the weight of it now is nearly unbearable.
room.
shambles
—
zoro’s world shatters, differently than before, and then theres nothing.
—
he wakes up in bed, bleary eyed and a pounding headache assaulting his senses. his alarm clock is going off which only adds to the drumbeat against his eyes. he grumbles and whacks around aimlessly to shut it off. the silence lasts a moment before his eyes fly open and he jolts up, sheets pooling around his waist. luffy. where was he? where was zoro? did the crew find him and take him back to the ship? did law fail? but this didnt look like chopper’s office.
he looks around to find hes in a room hes never seen before in his life, yet he instinctively knows is his. it all feels so wrong, like he doesnt belong in his own skin. he scratches lightly at his arm. he needs to go to work.
work?
what the fuck is happening.
its like his mind is at war with itself, one truth trying to dominate over the other. he trained at sensei’s dojo. he aged out of foster care. he was a swordsman, he was the first mate of the strawhat pirates. he didnt go to college, hes working construction. he made a promise, and kuina died. kuina…died. huh. his captain, his luffy, someone he knew so intimately and who knew him in turn. hes never met someone with that name his entire life. he needs to go to work, he needs to find his crew.
he doesn’t understand what the fuck is happening.
without his permission his legs stand him right up and he moves confusedly, surely, to the bathroom he didnt know he had. his reflection stares back at him in the mirror and its him, of course it is, he doesnt know why he expected someone else, but hes also…different. he has both function of his eyes, first of all. a scar in the same place as before but its light and healed over and doesnt seem to have blinded him like it once did. his hair is green, sure, but black roots peek out from underneath the familiar shade. hes grown stubble, he should shave. he needs to go to work.
hes so confused, but his body moves like its been doing this its whole life. as far as zoro knows, it has.
he continues getting ready, mind still at odds, and makes himself a cup of coffee (in his own kitchen. his own kitchen? the state of it leaves less to be desired. sanji would surely skin him alive) before tucking into his shoes, grabbing his wallet and keys and heading out the door. he seems to live in a single room apartment, and a crummy one at that. his legs move him faster, he has to go to work, he cant be late again (again?).
his car is parked outside the building, he has no fucking clue what it is but he unlocks it all the same and settles in. he feels like he shouldnt be operating this sort of machinery. franky would know better than him how it must work. he starts it up and backs out. trusting his gut to get him where he needs to be. he should be more concerned, he should be frantic and inconsolable, his captain was dead in his arms and now hes? what? going to lay some bricks or some shit? but he finds that part of him dulled in favor of following whatever mundanity this body is pushing him towards.
uumm whatever whatever he arrives at work eventually i dont know how construction jobs work are there offices or something. idc thats not the point. johnny and yosaku are there and zoro is surprised to see them since, as far as he knows, the last time they were with each other was at arlong park which was years ago for him. but the two greet him like this is a daily occurence, like theyve been working together for years. and zoro thinks, knows, they must have. but this is good, this is great fucking news actually because until now theres been no confirmation if zoro was here alone (wherever “here” is) but now his proof is right in front of him because if johnny and yosaku are here, and they exist the same as from before, then that must mean everyone else is here too right? he clings onto this hope with both hands trembling.
nami, usopp, the cook and chopper and robin and franky, brook, jinbe and fuck. fuck, luffy. theyve got to be here somewhere, zoro just has to find them. hes not sure if they remember things like he does but hes got to try because they are his as much as he has always been theirs and they should all exist together as it has always been.
so then yeah he finishes his shift because its what hes ‘supposed’ to do but he doesnt go home. he drives around aimlessly before pulling into a random lot and pulling out his phone (theres no snail attached to it. weird.) he doesnt even know where to begin. hes not usually the one coming up with plans, he just goes where theres blood need to be shed. but no one seems to be in any danger here except for maybe himself, and its not like he has his swords anyway- shit. fuck did he still have wado? he must have right? he knows there was a kuina that existed here too, he knows because he remembers. and she, well she wasnt around anymore so he must have wado. he must. with shaking fingers he pushes that aside for now, though barely. he needs to find luffy, but he wouldnt even know where to start. luffy could probably find the rest of their crew by simply wandering around and happening upon them, thats how he did it before. but zoro has no idea where he’d be, he doesnt even know where he is. nami or robin would be a good bet to at least form a plan, but he wouldnt know how to find them either.
is there even a coco village here? would robin still be part of baroque works? he needs someone who has a defined location that he could google or something (what the hell is google?). usopp would be at syrup village right? shit. is there even a drum island? these are all too broad, he needs something specific. specific…..a place with an identifiable name, somewhere smaller that would be easier to stake out…
a lightbulb goes off.
fucking shit he thinks. of course. of fucking course it would come down to the cook.
he types in “baratie” to his maps and a location pops up, just 27 minutes from where he is now. he hasnt eaten yet either, so he figures thats killing two birds with one stone. he taps the address, backs out of the lot and drives.
(if it takes him nearly an hour to get there thats nobodys business but his own)
he pulls up to the building about a quarter after 7. it seems packed enough already, but if memory serves him right then that was just par for the course for baratie. he parks, gets out and locks his car, then shoves his hands in his pocket and resigns himself to another oncoming migraine hes sure to get upon interacting with the man hes certain is waiting somewhere inside.
the tables are full, the host tells him, he slips a 20 from his wallet and suddenly (of course) theyre more than willing to serve him.
he gets settled in a far and somewhat isolated booth and a waiter comes up to him, but he cuts the man off as hes introducing himself and says “you got a blonde working here? stupid ass side part with a weird eyebrow? goes by sanji” the waiter looks shocked and put off by his rudeness but quickly collects himself and says “we might. depends on whos asking” zoro snorts “just tell him hes got someone who wants to talk to him,” he cringes at this next part, tries to smile but knows it comes off as a sneer. hes not sure if he still has conquerors haki wherever he happens to be now, but he tries to channel that energy the same way he would if he were in battle and says “tell him im a fan.” the waiters eyes widen, in fear or surprise zoros not sure (most likely a mix of both) before he nods and scurries across the floor, weaving in between patrons and coworkers alike until he disappears behind the double doors to the kitchen.
zoro sits with his arms crossed and skims through the menu out of boredom and impatience. its a couple minutes before he sees a familiar head of blonde hair emerge from across the way. a smile climbs onto his face despite himself. sure, the guy annoyed him to hell and back and their…friendship (if you could really call it that) was a tumultuous one, but it was good to see someone familiar nonetheless. he schools his expression before the blonde can spot him. a few moments pass before hes standing right in front of zoro, his stupid suit primped and pressed as always, and a cautious look on his face.
“you asked for me?” his tone is the one he only reserves for men who he deems not worth his time. zoro grits his teeth but says “yeah, theres something ive gotta discuss with you.”
hes never been one for tact, forever blunt unlike his swords.
sanji quirks a brow “i dont plan on talking about anything with anyone unless theyre a paying customer” zoro feels his eyebrow twitch but grabs his menu nonetheless and points to a random item without looking “i’ll have this then, and whatever booze you got.” sanji leans in to see what hes pointing to before his one visible eye widens and a grin slowly overtakes his previously unaffected face.
he speaks condescendingly. “wonderful choice sir, coming right up.” before zoro can get another word in he grabs the menu out of his hand, spins on his heel, and marches back to the kitchen.
zoro clenches his fists and does his best not to grind his teeth into a fine dust. no matter where they are or what displacement in time the fucking curly brow never fails to be absolutely insufferable. at least this way though, zoro knows its him for real.
its another 20 minutes before the shit cook reemerges from the back with a platter and a mug in his hand. he steps up to zoros table and places the plate and cup down in front of him with a smug look. zoro has no idea what the fuck hes looking at on his plate. he doesnt have time to question it before sanji plops down in the booth seat across from him, disregarding all previous faux-professionale and asking “so what do you want” zoro tears his eyes away from his plate and looks into sanji’s, trying to convey as much emotion, as much urgency as he possibly can.
“luffy needs us. and we have to find him” whatever the cook was expecting him to say, it definitely wasnt that. the other man regards him more warily now, looking him up and down with a tense frown before replying “i dont know what the hell youre talking about. and i dont appreciate being mocked or having my time wasted” he goes to stand up but zoro grabs his wrist, yanking him back down unceremoniously.
he blinks before rounding back on zoro, flaring his nostrils in a way zoro knows means hes about to get himself in deep shit “oi, what the fuck do you think youre-“ he doesnt let him finish “im not mocking you. this isnt some stupid prank or whatever youre thinking. and despite how much i would enjoy punching your teeth in right now im not looking for a fight either.”
the cook still looks affronted but seems to actually be listening. zoro continues “look, i dont know what the fuck is going on. i was at laughtale with you and the others, with luffy, and then i woke up and now im here and i dont know how but this is all wrong. its all wrong but i need to find luffy and fuck, i cant do it alone. i need your help to find him. find everyone.” the blondes eye is wide, but he blinks and its gone. he looks more tired than zoro has ever seen him
“im not paid enough for this shit. i dont know why i even-“ he looks like hes getting ready to leave again but zoro is desperate at this point so he blurts out whatever he thinks will convince the other man hes not bullshitting.
“we met you here, at the baratie. me and nami and usopp and luffy. luffy busted through one of your walls so your old man punished him by making him wash dishes. i dont, i dont know what luffy said to you, or how he convinced you to join us, but he changed your life like he did mine. we sailed together, and we had each others backs no matter how much we got on each others nerves. you were our cook. i was our swordsman. luffy was our captain and youd do anything to help him, i know you would, same as me. youre a pervert and an asshole and a damn annoyance, but youre strong. i could still kick your ass though” if the cook’s eyebrow could go any higher hes sure itd be clear off his forehead by now.
“and you- your dream. you wanted to find the all blue.” he stalls there, engine sputtering. zoro doesnt know what else to say, so he snaps his mouth shut.
the blonde is still gaping at him like a fish, but he mouths the phrase “all blue” like hes been searching for it his whole life, like he always knew but just never had the words.
he blinks.
then he blinks again, rapidly. there are tears pooling in his eyes. his mouth flaps for a moment before he seems to finally be able to push out words.
“you- zoro?” he sounds small. he sounds hopeful. zoro grins.
“yeah, yeah its me.” sanji stares at him a moment, then looks around, as if hes seeing everything with clear eyes for the very first time. zoro figures he might as well be.
“holy shit. holy shit.”
zoro laughs, a rough thing. theres a ball in his throat that he cant seem to dislodge. “nice to have you back, curly brow” sanji’s gaze snaps back to him before he scowls and tries wiping away the tears that are now streaking down his cheeks. its useless though, it seems they cant stop. zoro laughs again at the sorry state of the asshole in front of him, this time more full and genuine. he feels so relieved he doesnt know what to do with himself.
“yeah yeah, whatever dick head.” sanji grumbles. zoro quiets down, glances away, lets him have his moment. “fuck, mosshead, im still on the clock and you unload all this on me? how the hell am i supposed to finish the rest of my shift?” his words are sharp but he doesnt sound angry at all. in fact, when zoro turns back to look, hes smiling.
“you remember now though, dont you?” he has to be sure.
“what does it look like, dumbass? think im tearin’ up cuz of pollen or some shit?” the cook rolls his eye. theyre both silent for a moment, trapped in their own heads, before he speaks up again. “so, what now?” zoro doesnt even have to think before he answers “we find everyone else, obviously.” “well no shit, but how?” zoro glances to the side. “i was hoping youd figure that out” sanji stares before bursting out laughing. zoro scowls and hunches into his shoulders.
“of course!” sanji cackles “of course your dumbass wouldnt know what to do! you probably just typed in the most recognizable place you could remember and hoped one of us would be there!” zoro doesn’t answer, because yes thats what he fucking did, but it worked didnt it? he doesnt see whats so funny.
“fuck you.”
he wants nothing more than to bash that smarmy mouth in, but the familiar egging settles something in his soul. sanji gasps a few breaths before calming down, now wiping tears from his eyes for a completely different reason.
“alright alright, well lets figure this out then, yeah? we figure out how we got here then we can figure out how to get back right? simple enough”
zoro nods, “law was-“ he stops. remembers dull eyes and clammy skin and wrong wrong wrong. he shakes his head, “no, no we cant” sanji looks at him confused.
“we cant go back,” zoro presses, “not until i fix things. i promised i would” the other man seems to pick up on his panic and his mood dampens, becomes more serious. “promised what?”
zoros never been one to sugarcoat, but now he wishes he could find a way to soften the blow hes about to deal. he inhales, pushes the breath out. says, “luffy died, sanji.” the fact the hes actually using the other mans name seems to fly right over his head in favor of the first part. “what?” zoro huffs, is he really gonna make him say it again? “luffy di-“ sanji interrupts, angry now, fists clenched and whitened from the pressure “i heard what you said. but what do you mean.”
he doesnt want to have to tell sanji what happened, doesnt want to talk about it at all, wants to slice it up into small enough pieces that it very well may have never existed.
he told law the others wouldn't have to know, that he would make sure of it, but he's realizing now just how unrealistic that is. as much faith as zoro places in his own abilities, he's aware he's only one man.
and, he figures, if there's anyone i can trust enough to share a burden heavy as this with, might as well be the one who's strength i'd count on just as much as my own.
sanji cant help if he doesnt know what went down once they got separated at laughtale, so zoro sets his shoulders, clenches his fists, prepares himself like hes riding into a battle he knows he has no chance of winning—hes the first mate for fucks sake—and resigns himself to filling the other man in on every horrible detail
by the end, the cook looks much the same as zoro feels, pale-faced and shaky. he runs a trembling hand through his hair and clenches his eye shut. “fuck mosshead, thats…” he doesnt bother finishing, and zoro stays silent—already knowing just how much of a shitty situation it is that theyve found themselves in.
—
(btw the reason sanji was so smug about what zoro randomly chose on the menu is bc its one of their most expensive dishes. even upon regaining his memories he still makes zoro pay it cuz hes an asshole like that. business is business 😁)
uuummm i dont feel like detailing the rest basically my idea is that they work together to try and track down all the members as well as law, since hes also a part of this. i dont know how or when or in what order but i do know finding luffy would come last. so yes its zolu but for a majority of it more in spirit than anything. maybe i can throw in some luffy pov of him living with ace and sabo . he knows something is off but cant place his finger on what. he knows something is missing but hes got his brothers with him so what else could he possibly need? etc etc. you get the idea
#devil fruits don't work like this but don't sweat the logistics. just read with your heart not your head#it starts off rough cause im kind of just rambling about my ideas then the more i go the more it just turns into a fic#let me know your thoughts in the comments or my inbox or whatever i love discussing stuff hehe!!#as you all know im an artist first and foremost but sometimes my ideas get a bit too big for my current drawing skills so i write them down#so heres that#one piece#zolu#theres no guarantee i'll ever like. srsly continue this but i rly rly like it as a concept im invested LOL#and i have a few ideas on how the rest of the crew would be found that ive discussed w friends#so perhaps if i find motivation and can outline. an actual plot progression and clean up this first part...#well who knows... XD#also im not a zs truther in fact my insta followers r well aware of my. certain feeling on the ship#HOWEEVVEERRR i do think zoro and sanji have such an interesting unique and important dynamic/relationship#that i enjoy studying outside of a romantic lens#anyway ive spoken enough . pls enjoy! or dont thats fine as well
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idk if it’s ever been talked abt before but i was suddenly gripped by physicist in the love hotel thoughts like. what would be their ideal??? what would go down???
the love hotel is actually an insane concept but now i can’t help but think about it with physicist (and physouma, of course)
phys in the love hotel .... i dont think ive talked abt it before ? at least not at length . probably bc the love hotel is Slightly Weird to me , even if u hc the characters as adults which i do, there's still like . shinguuji, shirogane and iruma's which are just certified dr freakishness all over.
HOWEVER i think ive said before im a big fan of some of them. i love ouma's for character reasons and bc when i played the game i was a much bigger saiouma shipper than i am now ( not that i dont ship them anymore they just dont take up as much space in my head + i prefer kiiruma lol ) . i loved amami's , kiibo's, harukawa's, and momota's too :3
PHYS THOUGH . ok lets think. lets ponder together. we r those monkeys holding hands and spinning rly fast in a circle. you mentioned with physouma BUT i wanna quickly explore what a canonverse phys kamasutra event would look like, which would be with saihara.
i think it would be one of the events that kinda . border on romantic ? but is never explicit. definitely one of the more wholesome ones that would maybe revolve around them bonding or opening up to each other and ends with some slight physical touch ( which is sort of a big thing for phys ) like them resting their head on saihara's shoulder or them cuddling up in bed together and falling asleep. i think that could be kinda cute :3 as for the 'ideal' saihara would play for phys i can imagine it being maybe a childhood friend or a classmate they've known for a while, so they dont have to do the building blocks of building intimacy or small talk . which makes them anxious.
OKAY PHYSOUMA TIME. claps hands. the 'ideal' ouma would be playing would probably look different, since it's implied a big part of phys's initial attraction to him is trying to solve what makes his brain tick. they're a lot like saihara in that sense , and i feel like their love hotel event would take a similar form to the saiouma event in the game, with ouma playing like a phantom thief and saihara as a detective . very classic. but phys doesn't suit the role of a detective , exactly...
ok angsty thought . it's been mentioned that phys has passed through a few orphanages and foster homes so what if ouma as their ideal was another kid there . one who was super mysterious at first but is implied through phys's dialogue to have gradually opened up, and is now at the point where they have a fully trusting relationship. like phys makes comments on 'i'm so glad you opened up to me eventually' and 'i feel like getting to know you was such a puzzle... but i'm glad i stuck with it in the end! because it was worth it, for you.' AHHGHGHH sticking my head into a drain and screaming so my agony is reverberated throughout the entire street. just . so much emphasis on how phys's ideal for ouma is one where he trusts them entirely and their relationship is based on open and equal communication.
i can also see phys confessing and that being like the central kind of .plot point for lack of a better word. like the whole thing is kinda building up to it and ouma's getting progressively more nervous as he realises what they're getting at. i think he would try to evade it at first , do his normal tricks, but it risks the dream ending because phys's ideal of ouma is one that Doesn't Do That. so he very uncertainly relents and allows them to express how they feel . and at this point he's all I've Made A Big Mistake because its gotten way too emotional and intimate and theyre looking at him for an answer and it feels so real .
would he confess back or let the dream end . i guess it depends on how far in the story we are . sickening as it is. in a non killing game au i think he would confess . i think far enough into the story he also would , knowing that he cant and wont in real life because of what he plans to do in chapter 5 . but who knows ! who knows.
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hello! first of all, i love the concept of an illustration tournament! all of the illustrations add a more in depth feeling to doyle's stories, and there's something about those crisp lines. it's wonderful good to see there's someone engaging with them and taking the time for this poll! i myself have been looking for different illustrations of hutchinson's and paget's but i haven't found any good scans like the ones you post on your page. i was wondering if they were your scans or perhaps you had found them somewhere? i would love to know where to find them! cheers!
hi! thank you so much!! i really do think the illustrations are such an important element of the stories and it has been so cool to see how much fun people are having with the tournament <3
i definitely dont have any original scans unfortunately (i do have a 1912 strand annual at home but alas, no holmes stories that year 😔) but i have a few sources i got illustrations for the bracket from, plus just editing/cleaning up what i could of the ones that i couldnt find in better quality. i'v said a bit of this before but i havent actually gone through with links/explanations so:
Sources for Holmes Illustrations
Wikisource-UK Strand Holmes Portal - missing most of the Return collection for some reason, but a great source for Adventures, Memoirs, and Casebook, plus HOUN. generally good quality resolution but a bunch are edited to have transparent backgrounds which can be annoying depending on how you're trying to use it. (probably your best bet if you love those crisp-lined paget ones from Memoirs, which are also a lot of my favourites dskfdk)
And then more generally you can find a lot of stuff just clicking around the individual stories' pages on wikisource and wikimedia commons, im not gonna link to all those for the sake of brevity but theyre easy to find
ACD Encyclopedia - im linking directly to STUD so you can see the page format but at the bottom of each story's page is a more or less full list of known illustrations, these are not always great quality but its a good place for reference and there are a few where this was the only source i could find at all (the Steele piece for DYIN comes to mind)
Archive.org: Strand // Collier's // Hearst's Intl etc . The strand scans are pretty comprehensive but vary wildly in quality from some of the best ive found to ones so covered in moiree artifacts that they were not even salvagable. But especially for the later stories with Wiles and Elcock, it was often the only reliable source. Collier's is missing a lot of issues but you can sometimes find things and at least the covers are usually good. Hearst's i can only find for 1923 but its a rly good scan so if anyone can find the 21, 22, and 24 from the same source im 👀.
and I have had no luck at all locating online resources for the other magazines but i love seeing the pages in their original context so im kind of passively looking all the time lmao
I thinkk that covers where i got everything, obviously its been a while since i was doing all this so i might have missed something and there may be other places i never found, but these were the major sources i used at the time. Im not sure if this will help with Hutchinson since i was focusing on first publications only and im pretty sure he was only on book collections iirc? But i think his are on wikimedia at least.
#if hutchinson was in first print collections then woops he should definitely have been included at least in the elimination round#but hes not in my spreadsheet so i must hav ruled it out for some reason#sorry my memory is so bad dskfksfh#uh but yea i had fun with the puzzle of digging around for the best quality images and i lov to share resources so#i also fwiw did not go looking for any of the like originals or full color versions#like ik w paget theres some of the sketches and watercolors extant#which i have not looked for and so cannot help with#but theyre around#and presumably thered b a few of those for the other artists#at least maybe steele?#but yea also i read an article i THINK in the cambridge holmes handbook about pagets illustrations#and how they effected the popularity so much and the perception of the characters in general#and it rly stuck with me so! i do love seeing how into it ppl seem to be!#modern holmes fans 🤝 original strand readers
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idk if this is the type of question u wanted but how do u see the individual relationships between zan and flamberge vs zan and francisca? what is the sister lore according to u
YIPPEE TYSM FOR ASKING I WAS THINKING ABT THEM EARLIER
from canon we have that implication theyve drifted apart from what they used to be, theyre supposed to be a glued together trio but in game we hear all abt francisca n flamberge being close but no dialogue or screens regarding them n zan, meanwhile zan herself does show a lot of affection w the diabetes inducing "my darling franny and berge"
so going off of that, in general, i think zans enthusiasm for hyness no matter what hes doing started causing a drift between them, francisca does still hold some care for him n their faith but knows smth has been wrong for a long while n flamberge is getting spiteful abt it bc she has what r called standards, but zan is.a lot.its v hard to keep a positive opinion off someone whose standards r "he can hurt me if he wants i just dont want to be forgotten by him" n defends someone hurting you like its breathing no matter what hes doing, i dont think they dislike her tbh? but started just leaving her to her thing bc shed easily become upsetting to talk to, be it abt how hes treating them or how hes treating her, zan on the other hand is mostly unaware of this drift bc she spends sm time on work n thinks theyll accept his right to do anything to them since he saved them someday+shes the kinda person who after a fight just.acts like it didnt happen.she picked this up from hyness n again they just need to learn to accept it ! she believes theyre fine n clings into pretending nothing is changing they just need little reminders from her
but you didnt ask for general info so lets go into more detail !
zan n flamberge naturally butt heads even in a good day, zans the loyal devoted worker while flamberge can n will slack on the job bc its boring, zan follows rules while flamberge breaks them, lots of petty fights the jammerjabs cover their ears while walking nearby, but already prior for a long while n during KSA its.bad.very verrry bad.nearly all of the time they talk they start fighting abt smth regarding hyness, hes overworking them, hes being violent, hes clearly unsafe to be around, flamberge doesnt think any of his sad excuses work for hurting them (frankly her biggest concern is how its affecting francisca) n that drives zan absolutely insane.they WILL start screaming at each other over it n then solve nothing bc zan wont take anything for an answer.and part of their fights start bc berge is actually.v concerned abt her.like yeah shes RLY pissing her off w her apologism specially when frans safety is involved but they grew up together n zans just sad to watch.she cant help but bring up hes hurting her bc god why does she just accept it? so ultimately.zan thinks shes kind of stupid and is being stubborn, but still thinks of her as being close to shes just in denial, while berge ultimately focus her hatred on hyness instead of zan, who she just pities.bc zan says all that hes allowed to hurt them if he wants to yet when hes mad she pushes her sisters behind her to protect them.so odd.
francisca on the other hand, again, seems to have some passive acceptance of the situation, she wont defend hyness like zan, but she stays devoted n attached to their past together, so zans.fine w her.i think shes actually quite soft, reminding her the Dark Lord Will Reward Them With Paradise For Their Efforts ! while patting her on the head, fran on the other hand.is also uncomfortable around her, like yeah hyness used to be kind but god the stuff she excuses and justifies is just.a lot.but she hates seeing her and berge fight as well someone just give this girl the version of her family she has in her head back
tl dr fucked up in here ! youd assume theyre latina or smth from all the abuse apologism n issues caused by irresponsible parenting
(also its late if this doesnt make sense sorry </3)
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i REALLY need to express this somewhere bc i didint knwo where to go BUT since ypure the CEO of madarei (and orher rarpeairs i RLY like) i just can NEVER get over the fact that they have so much undiscovered lore togetjer 🥲🥲🥲 its like. they have a red string tying their bonds for fuck knows why (that successor business shit we never got to know what) and ITS MAKIGN ME LOSE MYMINDDD EVERYTIME I THINK OF ITTTT like what the HELL was he doing at their livign place??@?$#??#?$ this successor business shit is literaly fuckigng INSANE to me like what the actual fuckity fuck was that abouttttt 😭😭😭 (i even wrote like. a non-idol au fic thingy about this.) n im kinda sad the writers lowkey do not give a fuck abt elaboratign on this further .... UGHHGJJJ its just that they have so much THINGS going on behind the screen and its makign me rip my hair out EVERYTIME its slightly mentioned or implied 😭 like. how long have they known eachother????@??#?@??# im so fucing emo abt thrm omg
WAOW am i the ceo of madarei now ????? tis an honor o7
YEAH ITS CRAZY HOW LITTLE THEY ACTUALLY INTERACT ON SCREEN im kind of obsessed with it actually it makes them seem sooo mysterious .... i love me a good ship that doubles as a thinkpiece .
i dunno if its that the writers dont care to elaborate on their relationship , i think theyre doing it on purpose for the suspense and ambiguity. sometimes the best flavor to add to a piece of writing is the parts you leave up to suggestion . makes people have to think a little harder and become more invested in the characters as a result . the secrecy of it all is part of what makes madarei so interesting to me..... the writers do a really good job of writing from anzus point of view as a classmate and coworker, shes the protag but not the protag of every story so from reading the stories , we only have a little more information than she does. so the fact that we barely know anything about madara and reis relationship, in addition to the fact that the only other character that seems to know anything about their relationship is ritsu , suggests that madara and rei are actively hiding something. and ritsu only knows because madara was living with them for awhile when he was exiled; they didnt tell him. he wouldnt even know any more than the rest of the cast currently does if he wasnt reis brother .
i wanna bet theyve probably known each other since they were kids. at the very least since middle school cuz by the time madara was exiled, he and rei were already close enough that rei invited madara to stay with him and his family until he got back on his feet . the sakumas are incredibly secretive and cagey about practically everything, so the fact that reis parents allowed that to happen at all implies that they also already knew and trusted madara. which, for the sakumas, is not an easy or quick status to achieve .
so yeah. theyre up to something . cant say what it is or when well know, but the longer the writers hold out on telling us the harder itll hit when they do. ya think rei and madara are planning for rei to turn him into a vampire and thats what he means by successor? hahahahah. wouldnt that be something.
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ooooooh ok juicy sfc posts happening !! i rly honestly truly love to see it. here's my unasked for two cents, as someone who did find the story really hopeful. im posting this not to like, discourse or disagree or discount what im seeing, but to just maybe offer a different pov for ppl who might be trying to file this story away in a less devastating way.
i, of course, think baz deserves better than what he gets from his family. we all deserve to have families that love us unconditionally, and so many of us DONT have that -- including baz. that hurts !! i also think simon didn't deserve to lose his magic, and penny didn't deserve to take on the sole responsibility for keeping simon safe, and agatha didnt deserve to be shoved into every princess/damsel role ppl cast on her, etc etc.
what i like so much abt this series is that ppl dont get what they deserve, but theyre still okay. its why i also love the end of awtwb -- simons LICH ER ALL Y crying lol. he got a whole mega-bucket of extra trauma dumped on his plate that he hasnt even started to process. but its still so clear that he's got the support he needs to live a good life alongside this terrible knowledge. the mage fucked him over even more than he knew, but he doesnt have to define himself by these terms anymore -- we've seen his growth in this regard.
bazs main arc in the series is about how he sees himself -- in crudely simple terms, he rly wants to be a Good Guy (you know, not a vampire, straight, a good pitch etc etc) but sees himself as cursed with that impossibility. this continues as his idealized Good Guy self develops over the course of the books into something that actually feels more achievable to him and is less reliant on the shit his family put on him growing up.
the cool thing about snow for christmas is that -- just like when simon finds out abt the mage at the end of awtwb -- we get to see baz's new sense of self tested. we get to see what he's using to draw the lines of morality. and we get to see that while of course he still cares about what his family thinks, and it still causes him anxiety and trauma and all the shitty things that he doesnt deserve -- he has grown from that place where their value system can make him hate himself.
and moreso on the hope part -- the grimms value, above all, the ability to fit into the roles they think theyre supposed to hold. its bullshit, and they've both caused themselves problems and absolutely are fucking up their children. daphne fully had to be saved by a cult bc of it and shes still not over that mindset -- these ppl need therapy lol. so it's def sick n twisted that they're celebrating baz being able to hide better rather than celebrating who baz is, but is this not the utmost sign of love that they're capable of? baz gets to fit in better -- that's all they've ever wanted for him, whether we agree with that or not. baz seems to recognize the balance of this in the story. he narrates the rest of the dinner with a sort of dry, relieved, disbelieving tone. it’s like hes huffing a laugh, shaking his head, thinking, “did i really used to pin so much of myself on this stuff? how silly.” he is not distressed bc he understands his parents, and he has, again, divorced his sense of self from their expectations. so much so tht he says fuck it and gives simon the lil kissy at the end, because THIS is his new value system: he ALWAYS kisses simon goodbye!
so, is this a step forward for the grimms being more supportive parents? yeah, maybe not. maybe it never gets better than baz hiding his fangs at dinner and everyone doing the bare minimum to accept simon's role in baz’s life. that's not what baz and simon deserve. but it could be enough, because simon and baz have different ways that they measure their happiness by. they have each other and penny and shep and ruth and agatha and niamh and every other person they'll meet in the many, many years ahead of them whose opinions they can choose to make important to them, or reject. i love this for them! the true queer hope story imo. thats what i want for myself and for the people i love.
to be clear: this story made me sob so hard i scared my cats. (im not rly a crier, they did not know what to do). i had to put it down in the middle because i couldnt see the page. any queer person who has Family Shit is bound to get whammied lol. but! i personally find comfort in the idea that we can coexist with people who are important to us but also very difficult to be around, even if its not totally what we deserve. its a very quiet, somber hope -- but that only makes it feel more real to me.
#snow for christmas#snow for christmas spoilers#idk if we're still doing that hahahha#sfc#ss#a#<my ol simon snow analysis tag LOL been a while
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alright wybie here's a free ask to talk my ear off about fitpac GO
this is like a trap isnt it ih gos ok yea
the thing that gets me abt fitpac is that its not that deep. and i dont mean that in an insulting way or that their impacts on one another arent expansive and hugely helpful but i mean it in that like. theres no catch. i love spiderbit for their complexity i love fitpac for their simple, slow, love
that by no means is me insinuating its not got its edges though. theyre just. sweet.
i think both of them have a lot of trauma when it comes to imprisonment and just general fear for their lives and while that could be said for a lot of people on the server i think whats important is that they’ve recognized that in each other? or at least fit has from what ive seen
and pac (and mike tbf) need a constant right now. things are crazy people are disappearinf theres no stability but they can always trust that fit will be there and he will listen and more importantly that he SEES them and will defend them
i think my thoughts abt them boil down to ‘pac needs consistency. a solid rock. he needs a recognizable pattern that doesnt change so he can have a safety net’ and ‘fit spent so long in survival he doesnt know how to just Live and he needs someone to be patient with him’
and its not easy for Either of them especially right fucking now. whats happened is that fit is trying to be the solid foundation for a bunch of people and its wearing him thin. and pac is just speedrunning traumas.
god the babysteps thing will forever be imprinted on the back of my eyes tho. like yeah fit needs to go rly fucking slow. hes a traumatized single father and hes fucking cautious about everything. always has been. letting someone into his life and giving them space in his heart is a big fucking deal. he just cannot afford to make that choice lightly. hell even ramón had to be patient for a bit
whats the fuckin saying like. fell first but he fell harder? wheres the ‘he fell first but didnt wanna think about it until he accepted it at which point he fell so fucking hard it would ruin him to lose it’ thats qfit. he literallt cannot even say the words date or romance or love or wven really Like in a romantic context about pac because shit will get too real and he needs to go slow rven if he has to FORCE HIMSELF to move slowly.
gkd i dont even know where to start with pac. he needs consistency so bad. and mike was that- mike IS that. pac is someone who needs company he needs someone to be near especially lately after his whole kidnapping thing where he was alone in that fuckin room after whatever they did to him—
hes been through so much shit and he just needs someone to stay- someone to turn to and know he’s got slmeone on his side. like pac in his own right is sort of paranoid —not the kind of way he has been recently though.
but like if you had to force tazercraft into designations of head and heart, pac would be the mind and mike would be the heart. pac is thinking ahead, he’s trying to force himself to move on because he knows mike wont, he’s trying to avoid doing things too crazy to keep them off the radar— he’s keeping them out of trouble when he can remember to.
not to say hes not chaotic and passionate in his own right but yknow. comparisons. but hes a thinker yjnow he plans for the future and if he doesnt have someone to be his safety net he fucking panics and doesnt do things he wants to because he’s worried about being caught out alone without any support
all of this to say that he doesnt Really think of romance more then Fun because he needs safety nets first. which is also kind of why the moving slow thing works for him because he’s definitely not going to realize how in deep he is like love wise until its too late. and he probablt cant even fuckin risk it right now considering yhh like Everything going on.
#sorry this ended up more as a character analysis and its so messy#i just have a lot of thoughts about them#long story short; gay men with ptsd love each other through recognition of the other and their flaws#and it makes my heart ache#qsmp liveblogging#asks
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ive been having fun looking through the cards on the intimacy page and seeing what all i can understand/intepret from them and i just wanna ramble a bit about each so thats going under the cut (currently i have owyn, delos, xiel, mishe and heigl so just them until i get the others. also a little bit spoilery ofc)
no particular order so starting w/ mishe
his has the most obvious pieces i think. cityscape with a clock tower when he was raised in one after being taken in by his grandfather. books on shelves surrounding him because thats how he preferred to live etc etc. i think the stars in the inner circle could represent the sky that he loved to watch at the top of the tower during the evenings dotted with stars with everything still and calm. * i think what im most interested in is the outer ring (w/ the zodiac symbols) bc it looks a little like a magic circle and might be a nod to where he was originally from also hes got a very calm and neutral pose but i dont think theres much to glean from that
even with how much time has passed and heigl knowing his wife is dead and gone it still looks like hes waiting for her. which is funny considering her name which i have been ao sad about for days. If you didnt know, her name was Laica (which im sure is supposed to be said like laika. yknow the dog that was sent to space on a one way trip) and she left one day (on their anniversary no less) and didnt come home. but hes still there and he looks like hes thinking hard, probably about all the time he missed spending with her in favor of work. theres ofc also the gravestones at the bottom and the candles for a vigil. also did a quick look because i noticed the roses in his hand and scattered around the edges, and 3 (in his hand) can mean "i love you" and 8 (around the borders) can be a symbol of appreciation. also the roses in the border look like theyre on textile and from his backstory laica seemed to enjoy sewing and knitting.
ok from here i have a bit less to say/its a lot less concrete continuing:
owyn's looks the most peaceful to me tbh. out of all of the ones ive seen hes the only one thats smiling and seemingly content. what i will point out though are two things: one being the eagle, which im wondering is just a bird he might know or if its the one that was the messenger between helsinf and whoever it was that was warning him about people pursuing beastmen like owyn, and the other being the flowers in the border. unlike with heigl's theyre kind og hidden behind the border designs which feels to me like it represents his past with experimentation (and from what i can tell it was probably experiments eith the vialis curse). i wonder if he still thinks about it at all
i think the first thing i noticed is just how. empty delos' feels. like its still just as elaborate as the others so i dont mean that it LOOKS empty..but it FEELS like it is. despite how confidently he appears for the most part in the actual story here it looks like hes trying to hide. he doesn't want to be seen and i think its a mix of not wanting to take on his father's duty as the zarketh yet (mix of not feeling worthy of the role as well as feeling that if he takes it then its the same as writing off his father as dead which u see in the current event) plus feeling shame for not being the protector he swore he would be even if nothing that happened to his family is his fault. because at the end of the day he was supposed to be there for them no ifs ands or buts. and while the ocean is an important part of zarcove and a symbol of it i think you could also take it for the feeling of him drowning in his own insecurities and grief and lonliness
i forgot who i saw point it out or if it was on here or twit ill look late but i really didnt notice at first that he isnt smiling. i guess bc it looks so close to his actual sprite and he has a small smile there but it rly is a blink-and-you-miss-it detail i like. honestly to me his feels a bit empty like delos' just instead that "emptiness" is filled w/ a pretty background that screams opulence but like. it means little to him because thats just what he was expected to inherit. honestly while it has a church look to it (which i wouldnt understand much rn how that would fit in anyways i havent unlocked his last room) it does also remind me of a bird cage a little and i wonder if the floating pages have anything to do with all of the books and general entertainment he just couldn't have while growing up
#noctilucent: before dawn#noctlu#there might be some typos i gave it a quick once over but ill come back to fix it later#cliffnotes/.txt#feel free to add on if u like also 👍🏽 discussion fun
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thinking abt this because of the thing that im writing right now (im almost done with it holy shit)
the fact that donnies name gets changed once hes hypnotised is so important to me. names in general are something incredibly important to me for so many reasons. names represent identity, names represent the person who uses them. even if they are sounds we use to get each others attention, in a lot of ways, names are the summary of who we are. as a trans person, names gain even more significance to me even with that in mind.
when donnie get hypnotised and all his memories get removed, and his perception of himself and who he is gets so fundamentally changed that he simply isnt donatello anymore, he gets a new name. he is a new person, he is galois now. the name galois represents this new set of values, new identity, new perception of himself that he has. donatello is simply a different person, nevermind all the similarities between donnie and galois, nevermind the fact that theyre technically the same person. theyre different identities.
galois has a new set of formative memories. even if theyre altered versions of donnies memories. memories are the reason why we are who we are right now. if not for our memories and experiences, were nothing, no one (can you tell that im a strong proponent of the nurture side of nature vs nurture). and all of galois memories? theyre different from donnies. this fundamentally makes him a different person.
then theres the fact that donnies family refuses to call galois galois. galois used to be donnie, yes. but in some ways, donnies dead right now. maybe hell come back, if galois unlocks those memories (which he prolly will, its the only TRULY interesting thing, narrative-wise, no matter how much i thirst for a bad ending), but hes as good as fucking dead right now.
and yet donnies family doesnt acknowledge this. to them, galois is donnie, so theres no point in referring to him by the name that represents him. its an act of defiance. the name galois also represents the fact that draxum killed donnie and replaced him with a new identity. from their perspective, it doesnt matter if 'galois' doesnt remember being donnie! hes still donnie!
yes i do have the advantage of having seen galois perspective of all this, which does change my perspective on all this. because they dont know that galois barely know who this 'donatello' even is!
im gonna stop rambling here cause im just gonna start going in circles, but. galois having a different name is so fucking important to me. yes it happens in a lot of other similar fics to doth, but. i dont know, its just somehow different here, more Important. probably the fact that galois doesnt even have a notion that he was ever anyone BUT galois.
(keep in mind that this is all written from the perspective of someone who rly rly wants galois to stay with draxum because 1. plot, 2. i have no reasoning, i just like 'bad' endings lmao. i rly do treat galois as a different person from donnie because he is, to me at least)
(also i hope this isnt incoherent, i am very sleep deprive right now)
People have made parallels from Galois to 2012 Karai, and I feel like that applies here. Because it always really rubbed me wrong that Splinter kept calling her Miwa. That wasn't her name; she was not Miwa anymore. She'd been Karai her entire life and clearly felt more comfortable using that name. Yet Splinter just kept calling her by the name of his dead baby daughter, like he expected her to just jump back into that role. (I apologize if he does start calling her Karai later on, it's been a while since I watched the whole show through, but I don't remember him doing so)
And that just feeds into all the bullshit Karai feels about her identity after the truth comes out. She's quick to renounce Saki as her father, but is hesitant to embrace Splinter as such. She never moves in with the fam, despite still being a minor and there definitely being room for her there, since April lived with them for a while. And still, she claims herself as Saki's heir, taking over the Foot for herself after the Shredder is dead. She has a lot of complicated feelings about her past and her own identity, and Splinter calling her Miwa right off the bat must have been salt in the wound. The decision to go back to her birth name, to trade Oroku for Hamato, that should have been her decision, to be made whenever she damn well felt like it. It was not for Splinter to tell her who she is.
I don't want to spoil things too much, but a lot of that's going to come into play in Book 4. Donnie is going to have to come to grips with that fact that he is not Galois, Galois never really existed, but at the same time he's not really Donnie anymore. And he'll have to come to terms with who he is now and the roles both Donnie and Galois played in that.
I decided pretty early on that I wanted Draxumized Donnie to have a real name many of the above reasons. I didn't want to use 'Three' or 'Purple,' or just leave him without a name like some separated aus do. Slushie outlined it pretty well in hers-a number is not a name. A number or color could be easily set aside for his return to Donatello, because they were never really names at all. They're just denominations. Everything he was under Draxum could be easily swept under the rug, because that wasn't really anybody. Just Draxum's brainwashed slave, without a character, without a name. And that wasn't what I wanted his time as Galois to be.
I will say that his memories didn't alter his personality as much as it would have if he'd actually lived it all. Donnie already had a fully-formed personality when he went into the Galois machine, Gale wasn't built up from ground zero. He still does and says things based on how Donnie would have acted, even if it wouldn't make all that much sense for Galois. His middle-childness, for example, he's a shithead little brother to Cass a lot despite Galois being an only child and having no frame of reference for having siblings. Sometimes his implanted memories and his personality cross each other, however, and leave him very confused for a bit, so those Donnie mannerisms are fading and being replaced by Galois.
(Honestly, I don't think there's a single way for a 'Gale stays with Draxum' ending to work at this point. Maybe back during the Table Arc, maybe if Draxum had let him up then and swore to change his ways, maybe if they talked a lot and Donnie was able to ease the fam into forgiving him, then maybe they could have had that father/son happily ever after. But the brainwashing was a point of no return, Draxum can't pull back now and his mission is doomed to fail. Any bad ending at this point would just result in their deaths)
Part of the fam's reaction is denial, Donnie can't be as 'gone' as he seems to be. They'll pop his memory back in and everything will go back to normal.
But the other part is that they still love him regardless of what he's calling himself. So he thinks he's the son of an evil scientist and bites them if they try to give him a hug, big whoop. He's still the same soul. He's still their son, their brother. He's still family.
And family means nobody gets left behind.
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im already about to cry and the episode hasn't even started yet, so that's a nice sign that'll probably foreshadow how tonight is gonna go
PLS I LOVE HER SO MUCH
SHE ACTUALLY LISTENS AND TALKS TO KANGHAN
SHE IS MY GODDESS
MY QUEEN
MY MILF
9GO3U4ERHDSGN9P8IO4EURBDGN980OEUVDS
I KNEW SHE WAS CAPTAINING THE SHIP BUT HOLY FRICK NUGGETS
GUEOJRKBGNUOERJDFBGEUOR
IM SOBBING SO HARD RN
lmao nice joke
based on this scene being right at the start here, this episode is definitely gonna be the one where he properly realises his feelings for sailom (if he hasn't realised them already, which I dont think he has. he hasn't accepted it, at least)
AND BASED ON THAT LOGIC, generally the way these writers and directors etc base these ones, they fully lean into the fell first / fell harder dynamic, and almost immediately after the second person realises, they kiss
SO im very much hoping for a kiss at the end of this episode (but it also might not be til next episode)
WE'RE WHAT, ONE MINUTE INTO THE EPISODE?? AND WE'RE ALREADY GETTING TO THE INTIMATE STARES????
OH BOY IM SCARED FOR THE REST OF THE EPISODE
I THINK MY GAY LITTLE HEART MIGHT ACTUALLY EXPLODE
oh yup, oh yup, we've got the heartbeat sound in the background. kang's feelings are coming to lightttt (PLEASE LET THEM KISS TODAY)
AAA
IM SO EXCITED FOR WHATS GONNA HAPPEN BC OF THIS
my theory that they're gonna run away during school hours is still going strong
NOOOOO THE SCENE WAS SO NICE AND HAPPY AND FLUFFY WHY ARE YOU HERE TO RUIN IT YOU BASTARD???
yup okay so that theory is definitely right
(the theory that saifah's gonna like steal from kang's house, and his dad is gonna get shot in the process. not my own theory, it's from @ respectthepetty and it's such a good theory, I love it so much)
OML THIS IS SO FUNNY
I CANT WAIT FOR MORE BATHROOM SHENANIGANS, THIS IS GONNA BE WONDERFUL
awh is he lonely?
he needs a hug
from kang
all through the night
it'll be insane if they do tho, its literally night one, there's no way
I TAKE IT BACK, APPARENTLY IM WRONG????
OKAY NVM APPARENTLY I WASNT WRONG
im half convinced kang is gonna walk in or smth tho
YALL IM SCREAMING, HE FULL-ASS JUST HEEHEED
THEY ARE FRIENDS
AAAA THE LYRICS
I JUST LOVE THEM SO MUCH
THEYRE SO PLAYFUL WITH EACH OTHER
WHAT THE HELL
what I wouldn't give to be that driver rn
THE ARM OVER THE SHOULDER???????
THEYRE LITERALLY SO IN LOVE?????????
OMG
PIMFAH
MY WIFE
I rly wish that screenshot was better but the wifi is being stupid for no reason (which isn't surprising since this is Australia and we have the shittest wifi there is)
anyway IM SO SURE JUNE IS GONNA SHOW UP TODAY
GIVE👏US👏LESBIANS👏
DID I NOT SAY IT?
I WAS RIGHT YALL
AAAAAAAAAAA
LITERALLY IMMEDIATE
AS SOON AS THE OTHER MAJOR FEMALE CHARACTER WAS INTRODUCED, B O O M, LESBIANS
I VERY MUCH APPRECIATE THIS
although I wasn't expecting it to be teacher/student
she is just a trainee teacher, but its still a bit ick
idk tho
I guess we'll see what they do with it
gay panic in real time
ooh yes ive been waiting for the familial need for an heir thing to crop up, yesyesyes
making me think of drarry now
OKAY SO MAYBE I WAS WRONG
MAYBE HE DOES LIKE HER
but the things I said are still true
the evidence we've gotten before just now havent really felt solid enough to argue that kang likes pimfah
but now... I guess I have to agree
pimfah knows/suspects/ships it and no one can convince me otherwise
IM WHEEZE-LAUGHING THIS IS HILARIOUS
THE MUSIC PLAYING IN THE BACKGROUND?????
I CANT RN
SO THIS IS DEFINITELY A DREAM SEQUENCE, RIGHT?
I wasn't expecting imaginary scenes from this series but I deeply appreciate it
I CANT STOP LAUGHING
THIS IS SO EMBARRASSING, SAILOM
YOU SHOULD BE EMBARRASSED
BUT ITS ALSO SUCH A MOOD
also I like kang's shoes
Y E S
I WAS HOPING FOR OPEN HOUSE VIEWJUNE
again, I wasn't expecting it to be teacher/student, but anyway
OH YOU LESBIANN
G3I4ORENHGKLS
I would do the same tho
June is so pretty
and so is view
and so is chimon
and so is Perth
(and so is satang)
(no I will not shut up about my satang and perth siblings agenda, its too good to keep to myself)
NO IM OUT OF IMAGES
on the bright side, it took a lot longer to run out today than it did last week
#quodekash disregards sleep because of dangerous romance#dangerous romance#dangerous romance series#dangerous romance the series#kanghansailom#kangsailom#sailomkang#sailomkanghan#perthchimon#chimonperth#chimon wachirawit#perth tanapon#view benyapa#june wanwimol#viewjune#juneview#pimfahnabdao#nabdaopimfah
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