#they can do epic flips and love to jump around

[zweables]

found a new slugpup i named her snowball

[bronx-bomber87]

Hello lovely fandom and happy Wednesday. We are cruising along with 6x09. Can't believe we're already on the second to last ep. Not a ton of Chenford or Tim in this one but what we do get is GOOOD. It's an all around good episode though. Let us begin.

6x09 The Squeeze

Recap of 6x06-6x08 got me all in my feels before this one even starts. Poor Tim killing me right off that bat. Always be floored by Eric and his ability to convey so much with a look. How it just makes me wanna hug his hurt away. No wonder Lucy always pulls him in for hugs. How could she not? I’m sure he hasn’t even begun to process how he feels. It’s a lot what just happened to him. It all unfolded in the blink of an eye.

Someone who he used to work closely with killing himself in front of him. Doing so because he’s a dirty cop. Not only that but taking all his secrets with him. Only thing Tim got out of it was Dr. London being dirty too. Grey shows up to the scene and startles Tim out of his thoughts. He debriefs Wade letting him know Mad Dog confessed to being dirty. That he believes Blair to be apart of it as well. Now we all know he didn’t mention her by name.

BUT it was pretty damn implied. With the awkward interactions in the hospital and the rooftop scene. Wade asks if he used her name specifically? Tim tells him no….But it was clear she was who M.D. was speaking of. Grey reminding him to be careful of accusing without any evidence. As amazing as his cop gut is that’s not evidence unfortunately. Loving the hat on Wade btw. Very fitting.

It’s not too long before the accusatory Detective Pearson shows up. Not loving him from the jump. Couldn't stand him for couple reasons. One because douche bag just comes off him in waves. Two the way he comes at Tim makes me wanna knock him on his ass. This guy coming in way too hot for my liking. Far too eager to pin this on Tim.

Makes my protective Sicilian side emerge and she’s not happy. I do love Grey being quick to Tim’s defense. No one better to have his back in this moment. Lucy would be great of course. But Wade is the superior in this moment so his 'back off ' holds more water. Gotta love this man. Always protects his people.

Wade can tell Pearson wants to have a slam dunk case against Tim. It’ll further his career to get such a high-ranking officer tangled in a dirty mess. It's why Grey tells him as such. Ugh. What a schmuck. Kudos to the actor though. I instantly dislike him so well done sir LOL The way Tim watches the body get wheeled away breaks my heart. Damnit Eric you’re too good at your job. Expressing so much in that look I just want to hug him. But that’s Lucy’s job later…

We join Celina officially moving in. This will be an interesting dynamic for s7. Especially after they get back together. I’ll be intrigued how that is all handled... But I’m getting way too ahead of myself. It's hard not to when we don’t know anything. It’s easy to daydream and speculate about the unknown. Anyways John is there and sadly not as a friend but to check in on Celina. She says he’s just making sure she’s not late for her shift.

Nolan commenting would reflect poorly on him and his performance review is coming up. Not selfish at all John….His review should be ‘Needs work.’ But we all know how I feel about him as a teacher. He asks Lucy how she is? I don’t think he expects the epic rant he receives. I mean she has healed some but not nearly enough. Her words sounding like she’s trying to convince herself. Makes me sad. Doing her best to flip all this upheaval into a good thing.

Our girl feels really lost in her life right now. All the turmoil that I don’t know she’s really dealt with. I think part of her having Celina move in is she doesn’t have to deal with it as much. To not have to be alone and sit in her feelings. Because I am the the same way. If left alone too long with my thoughts they eat at me. This scene just being more proof she hasn’t dealt with much of it at all IMO. I know the prevailing theory of the season for Lucy was she was alone. Isolated. I mentioned this in my mini too.

I think a lot of the isolating is self inflicted. Her and Tim are very alike in how they handle emotional distress. At an arms length and solo. Other than Jackson, Tim is the only one she’s really allowed close to her. Tamara yes but that's always been more maternal and not like what she has with Tim. And even him she doesn’t tell everything to and vice versa. It’s very in character for her to do this. I know people thinks because she’s bubbly, optimistic and outgoing this isn’t the case. But it is. Just like how people who are depressed don’t come off that way. When there a signs of it despite their ‘happy or sunny’ demeanor.

She was isolating herself before the breakup even occurred. Rewatching this season she was doing so from the very jump of s6. Their fight in 6x01 being proof of that isolation. She felt herself overloading and shoved him away with her accusation. That was just the start. 6x04 and her rash decisions with Jeff Budny is a huge one as well. She didn’t include the one person she should’ve in that ep. It's how we ended up in that hospital room with her. I’ve said this many times before. But her and Tim are quite alike in how they handle their emotions.

Tim’s is showcased more especially this season. It's easier to detect. If you're really looking you can see her's. Lucy’s were screaming through out this entire season as well. She is a control freak just like Tim in the way she shuts people out. Even her person couldn’t get in and vice versa. They have the same fatal flaw. It’s why their lack of communication became their downfall. Our girl has as much growing to do as Tim does. I’m hoping all this is a setup for s7 for her. To me her explosion here is an example of her not dealing fully with what happened still. Shall see how s7 is handled for her. I'm hopeful.

Their convo is interrupted by Angela calling Lucy. First off I love her looking out for Lucy. Just like she does with Tim. There was a great parallel set for this and 2x12. Angela providing comfort to them both when the other is in distress. Our on-screen cheerleader for them both and I love it sfm. Even knowing what a weird place they’re in, she knew Lucy would wanna know from her than anyone else. We love you Angela Lopez. You’re a real one.

She also knows Lucy well to tell her right off the bat he’s ok. You know her heart stopped when she began that sentence. We watch Lucy instantly go into wifey mode. Both in her body language and tone of voice as Angela explains. How she turns her back to the others when it’s about her person. Needing a moment to herself as she absorbs this information.

Melissa crushing it in this scene with everything she does. From closing her eyes taking in the severity of this situation. To the concerned wifey tone she switched to quickly. We all know she has a million and one thoughts rushing through her brain right now. Mainly was he ok? Does he need her? The worry for him settling into her soul and growing rapidly by time the call ends. Once Angela hangs up she finally turns around and updates them. Concern flooding her tone.

The wifey vibes continue when John gets a call shortly after. Tim has called him to be his union rep. (Only reason he would ever call Nolan in a personal matter...) We watch as anxiety all but pours out of Lucy. Worried wifey mode has activated and it’s not going away. Despite everything they’ve been through. Everything he’s done. Her number one instinct is worry and concern for him. It's deeply rooted. It's who she is.

She loves him so much still. That is written all over this scene and her reaction. That instinct to be there for him coursing through her like a powerful current. I love her stopping Nolan before he goes. The worry seeping out of her tone. Asking how he sounded? Nolan just replying ‘Tight.’ Which is apropos for Tim in situations such as this tbh. The reason she asked this was that she could gather everything she needed to know about his state of mind from that information alone.

When she hears Nolan’s reply her worry increases tenfold. Melissa is killing me in the best way in this scene. Props to her and Eric once again for this season. I can't praise them enough honestly. It hurt so much but hot damn if they weren’t giving their A game and more every single episode. Holy hell. Not that they don’t always. Just with such limited episodes they did really good with the material. Writing was superb for them. They rose to the occasion and then some.

Tim is so anxious waiting for Nolan it’s making me anxious. He is wound so damn tight right now. Not that I blame him but we can feel the anxiety just seeping out of him. The tapping of his feet, hands, and whole body is tense before Nolan arrives. He pops right up the minute John enters the room. He doesn’t look at all prepared for what Tim is about to thrown down at him.

Nolan tries to ask him questions but Tim doesn’t have time for it. Immediately let's him know what’s going on. That they’re going to want to hang this on someone. Now that Mad Dog is dead their scape goat is gone. All that is left is Tim. He’s STRESSED they’re going to hang this around his neck. That he needs Nolan to take over the investigation. I said this in my mini and I'll say it now.

My first thought was I don’t trust Nolan with this….That I wouldn’t have chosen him to spearhead this whole thing. But Tim doesn’t have a ton of options atm. So he’s gotta go with what he’s got. And that happens to be John Nolan right now. He asks Tim who to investigate? Tim tells him to look into Blair London the rookie police department shrink.

That he’s been seeing her and so has Aaron. That he thinks she had leverage on M.D. and that’s why he jumped. I wanna pause here and say how proud I am of Tim in this moment. Look at him reaching out for help this time. Not trying to quarterback this alone. Handling this completely differently than how he handled Ray. Not isolating himself and trying to figure this out solo. He’s going through the proper channels this time. Not wanting to do a OP and segregate himself from everyone.

To say it sucks Dr. London is dirty is an understatement. Because my greatest fear would be what she does in this episode. BUT I am forever grateful to her in the same vein. Because despite her being dirty she truly helped Tim in short time he had her. Look at the growth in this moment right now. I’ve said this many times already but I truly hope we continue his therapy journey. The results are astounding and I need more of this growth. It’s just like Chenford ship crack to me. Tim growth is my other drug of choice haha Give it to me writers LOL

We see Pearson is under Dr. London thumb. (Monica’s really) It leads up to this next scene that makes my blood boil. I hated watching this scene the first time and I didn’t love it any better second time around. It makes me sick to my stomach to watch unfold. How Pearson comes after Tim like a dog with a bone. The way he uses Dr. London to solidly his reasoning makes me all kinds of angry. I'm seeing red.

I HATE them using his sessions and twisting them for their own gain. It was like I said earlier this was my biggest fear of her being dirty. This right here. Gotta commend Danielle Campbell though. She does a really good job in this scene. Even though this was her idea you can see the conflict raging in her. Because she is the one who convinced Tim to go to therapy. For pure reasons actually. To help him out. Which she did. We know that’s why she’s under Monica thumb.

She used her need to help people against her. That she is only doing this because she is being coerced. Doesn’t excuse a damn thing, but explains her hesitation and almost tortured look in this scene. Especially when Pearson comes at Grey. Accusing him of favoritism. Saying he cares more about that than this city. You can see the restraint on Wade's face not to knock this punk out. How very dare you come at him and Tim like this. Makes me wanna rage so much.

This scene right here is why love Angela Lopez so much. That fiery passion she has for those she loves. How she is unwaveringly loyal to those she holds dear. Tim being that person in this moment. Not gonna lie that’s why I love this moment so much. Calling her husband. Love her of her life to chew him out to defend her brother. Her first instinct just like Lucy is to protect him.

To make sure if he’s charging Tim that she better know first. Hot damn Angela. Tell us how you really feel. haha This man is so lucky to have this fire ball in his corner phew lord. Telling Wes she stands by Tim a thousand percent. That he’s family. Ugh my heart. Gonna make me cry. I love their friendship so much. Give me more of them in s7. Their dynamic is fantastic and I need far more of it in my life.

We arrive at the best part of the episode. After nearly fifteen minutes filled with tension…We need this hug as much as these two do. My god. I adore her being so attuned to him. Lucy sees him and knows she needs to go to him. She can see how tense he looks. The clench in his jaw very evident. Her look damn near mirroring the worried look she had in 5x19. That same longing look to reach out to him surging through her. Worried Lucy is a fav of mine and we got to have that a lot in this episode.

This time she doesn't stop herself and we all love her for it. She worries about him, regardless of the state of their relationship. It’s what drives her to go after him before his elevator closes. That magnetic pull she can’t explain nor describe. All Lucy knows is she needs to be near him and comfort him. That even from afar she can tell he needs her. As I said earlier Lucy is so attuned to Tim and what he needs. It’s a beautiful thing to witness.

To say Tim is shocked when she keeps the elevator from closing is an understatement. Not only that but stopping it so they aren’t interrupted. Wanting to ensure they have a moment alone. Even when she says to be clear she’s still mad. That this doesn’t change anything. He’s still clueless as to what is going on here. You can see it all over his face above. He has zero idea why she is in here right now.

Because in his mind there is no way she’s thinking about him. Let alone wanting to be there for him in this moment. Which breaks my heart. The last thing he ever expected was for her to care for him. Or about him in any way shape or form. Also the 4x09 vibes coming off this hug had me losing my friggin mind. This hug is everything. It showcases their bond, the intimacy that still exists between them, the vulnerability has me reeling and how they are each other’s safe place still. *happy sigh*

The way she pulls him in reminiscent of the 4x09 hug. Tim standing there not expecting this moment of comfort and getting it. It’s the way she draws him into to hide in her arms. Just like she did in ‘Breakdown.’ I’m fine….Only difference in this hug from that one is the way he just melts into her arms. The face smoosh into her shoulder. Once again mirroring that infamous hug. We watch all that anxiety and stress just drain out of him. The tension he was carrying into the elevator leaving his body once he's in his happy place. Closing his eyes and surrendering to the comfort she brings him.

He immediately wraps his entire body around her. Melding into her. Easily falling into this hug and her arms. Like two puzzle pieces that are meant to be together. Fitting back together so effortlessly after time apart. Encasing her back in his hands and snuggling in for good measure. Clinging to her like she is his emotional life raft. Because. Well she is. Holding her as close as he physically can. Cherishing this moment. Because I’m sure he never thought he would experience this again. Holding her in his arms like this. Feel her comfort and love.

These two make me insane in the best way. Also let me once again point out Tim's growth. He didn’t even try to fight her like he’s done in the past. He sees this for the gift that it is and absorbs this moment. Savoring it really. The peace you can see on his face floors me. Eric at it again. You can tell this is first time in long time he’s felt whole. This hug is beautiful on some many levels. You can feel the raw emotion coming out of them both.

The concern that’s been building up in Lucy since this morning coming out in waves. She is tucked in TIGHT to him. Clinging to him as much as he is clinging to her. I'm not ok. You can hear the immense worry in her voice as she asks him if he’s ok? Despite everything she felt the draw to be there for him. The way she looks like she can finally breathe as she asks him that question is EVERYTHING.

We get some good hands hands hands in this hug. I can’t stop staring at her thumbs in that gif either. The soothing way she is running her thumbs up and down on his back and arm. Methodical in her soothing of him. Gah I cannot you guys. Her remarkable empathy shines through in this moment. This was a balm my soul needed so much. That all of us needed. We all know how much our boy longed for this.

Can't get over her face pressed so tightly into his neck. Doing this, as she asks him what she’s been dying to since she received that phone call. Like she couldn’t breathe until she knew the answer to this question. Look at the concern on her face when she does. I’m reeling and sobbing. Lucy looks on the verge of tears herself. Their hearts are just starting to mend in this glorious hug. You can feel it. Ours too.

No one does hugs like our ship does. They’re always top tier goodness. Holy hell. They’re just breathing each other in. Calming one another down. The anxiety that was raging in both of them cooling down to a simmer in this embrace. He has melted into her like butter at this point. Reveling in the comfort and empathy she's providing him. The way he says ‘I am now.’ Reminiscent of 5x21 and their phone call in the alley. How he wasn’t ok till he heard her voice.

Song remains the same in this moment. He wasn’t ok until now. Until she had her arms wrapped around him for this hug. Didn’t know he was holding his breath till she released it for him. It’s how he sways with her and sinks even further into her arms. Smooshing his face even farther into her shoulder. It’s so sincere his reply back that I am just a puddle of emotion. He’s so vulnerable in this moment with her.

Letting her know he wasn't ok until she was there. Imma scream at how much I love this growth in him. If there was any more doubt in Lucy’s mind of his feelings for her, this hug and his reaction to it should clear that right up. That is a man who is still so in love with her. Letting her know he wasn’t alright until she came and found him. I’m not crying you are…. Find you a person who knows what you need when you need it. Even when you’re not in the best place. That’s Lucy Chen for this man. Reigniting him falling in love with her all over again in this moment.

Lucy picking up on this growth reflects in her reaction back. Gah it’s the way she tightens her arms around him after she hears this. Closes her eyes and tries to bring him even closer. Trying to wrap him up in her arms even tighter. Absorb any stress he is carrying right now. The sheer relief written all her face. The way she shuts her eyes knowing he’s ok because she is there. *sobs*

Just melting into this man as she holds him as close as she can. Clinging to him as much as he is to her. I’m not ok in the best way. I remember thinking this hug would feed my soul into the hiatus. Just gonna scream into a pillow how much I love this moment. Their chemistry is insane and with a hug? Even more so my god. We are blessed to have a ship where our hugs are this amazing.

I love this faraway shot of their hug. They are in-sync as they part. How do they do that? We can see how deeply entangled they are. Nary an inch between them. You can see how they were just clinging onto each other for dear life. Look at Tim’s arms/hands. How gentle and intimate his are placed.

Having her as close as he can. It’s the hand gently wrapped around her lower back that has me losing it. It’s just so intimate I can’t get over it. Lucy is retuning the favor in kind. She too is just as intertwined as he is in this moment. Arms clinging to him and her face buried in his neck. Their chemistry on massive display here.

You’d think the hug alone would be enough to make me squee to death. Lucy follows it up with fixing his collar. I’m dead. The most wifey move of all moves. Reminded me of the lint picking from 5x12. Such an intimate coupley thing to do. I’m losing my damn mind over it. Wife energy coming off her in waves. Just seemed so automatic and natural when they part.

Also she touches her arm before reopening the door. She can’t keep her hands off him and I’m here for it. Tim looks like he’s going to cry in that elevator. I also love Tim putting his hands in his pockets right after. Because if he doesn’t he’ll never let her go. They’ll never get off this elevator. He could've stayed in that hug all day.

Basked in the comfort she had to give him. So he puts his hands immediately in his pockets after they part. Ugh my heart. They miss each other so much and this hug is screaming that. Also screaming how they didn’t miss a beat. How natural and wonderful it was. *happy sigh* This hug giving me true hope for the first time.

They re-open elevator to find Angela and Harper waiting for them. They look like they’ve been caught. Like they didn’t just have this deeply emotional embrace. The looks they share before Lucy leaves are LOADED. The expression on Angela’s face... She knows they interrupted something. I adore her saying she can get him extradited if he needs it. Love this woman so much. We know just like Lucy she is willing to do anything for this man.

Makes my heart so happy. All these women in his life want is to support and protect him. You can tell Angela wants to be tagged in so badly. Tim telling her won’t be necessary. He didn’t do anything wrong. That she had his back last time. He has different forces at play this time. Adore her saying 'Different isn’t me.’ Not it’s not ha Sadly last of Tim for this ep. *pouts*

Another telling scene for Lucy. Really really need s7 to clear these things up for her. Because despite being wonderfully empathetic human to Tim. She is still lost in life and not sure who she is. I NEED UC and some other things clarified for her next season. I really do. Just because she’s amazing at UC (and she is) doesn’t mean it’s her path. I do love this scene because it’s just Lucy being Lucy.

Having EIGHT covers ready to go. Our little nerd in action here. I adore it so much. It’s the most Lucy Chen thing she could do. Telling them it takes twelve off duty hours to grow. I love her so much. It’s not a mystery why Tim is so damn gone for her. Their faces as she explains cracks me up. Tim wouldn’t be shocked in the least. Hell I’m sure he was there while she was growing some of them.

The detective line is just another stab at our hearts though. Hoping for clarification and goodness for her career in s7. Manifesting it. As much as I need their reconciliation.(and I need it bad) I need her path resolved just as much tbh. For her to find her purpose and grow. Because once her and Tim do this. That reconciliation is gonna be even sweeter because of it.

I will say I was impressed with Nolan. Enjoy this it won’t last ha He handled investigating Blair really well. Rattling the cages of the potential dirty cops she was seeing just by showing up to her office. I forgot seasons 1-2 Nolan was a good cop. He just got really annoying after s3. LOL Also roping Smitty in was hilarious. He was already there for the food so might as well use him.

It’s the first time in what feels like a long time I enjoyed John. He enlists Nell too to help him with data from dispatch. Maybe it’s Bailey that makes him extra irritating to me. Lmao Sorry Jenna....lol Anyways quite the miracle Nolan pulled off in this ep getting me to like him. Not only that but commend him on the job he’s doing. Helping out Tim in a major way and I can’t deny that.

Nolan’s plan works out like gang busters. He went to her office to rattle a dirty cop into revealing himself. Pearson does it perfectly. Losing his mind about finding out they were in Mad Dog's apt. Like I said earlier I commend John on his work in this. Had Tim’s back and then some with his investigation. If they wrote him like this more wouldn’t dog on him so much lol

The other part that is so great is Grey. He is a papa bear ready to devour anyone messing with his work kids. This part was so cathartic to watch after earlier. Watching him dismantle Pearson like the schmuck he is. Was sick of him stomping around the station. Acting like he can just be top dog when he's really on a leash.

Rubbed me the wrong way being disrespectful to Tim and threatening Wade. Watching him attack Nolan/Celina is Grey's final straw. Puts that turd in his place. We watch him visibly shrink as Grey tears him a new asshole LOL All but telling him to stay in his own lane. Get em’ Wade! Nolan putting together the connection of Pearson and Blair due to this. Was fun to watch them piece this together.

Scenes like this give me agita like no other. My heart was beating in my chest for her. Lucy did a really good job despite the toy. Unfortunately it’s one of those loud musical ones. That not only gives away her position. But possibly her cover in the process. He find it’s on the floor. Looking menacing af. This man gives me the creeps on so many levels. I hated this mission for her on so many levels.

Unfortunately they’ll need her going back into the house. Now that Monica is in play it’s crucial she is there. Especially with Batista investigating who tried to kill her. Lucy is worried they’re going to blow her cover faster with her involved…But it’s a risk they have to take. If Tim knew about this he would be feral. Oh Feral Tim how I miss you. I need more 2x11 feral Tim in my life. That's a wishlist for s7 I suppose.

The ep ends with Nolan making a deal I’m not sure he can make lol But he was good in this episode so I’ll give him a pass. You can see how panicked she is. I am impressed John got her on this bench I will say. Getting her to almost spill her guts to him. Saying she didn’t think anyone would get hurt. That's what they all say....

I will say I missed Tim a lot in this ep after he was gone. That's my man. But it was a good episode. Reminded me of what a good ensemble cast we have as a whole. That's all she wrote for this one.

As always thank you to everyone for reading, liking, commenting and reblogging these means more than you’ll ever know. Shall see you all in the finale with 6x10 :)

~~~

Side notes-non Chenford

We get more insight in how Dr. London is being leveraged. Of course it’s a Monica connection because she is the absolute worst….

It’s great to see Pearson get nailed to the wall at the end of the ep. Prick.

[mentaly-british-biologist]

How TF2 mercs enjoy pool days:

Ok, so this may be based on my own beliefs on what they would do during a pool day, but screw it. I want you to think of a scenario. All the mercenaries finally decide to go on a summer break to a nice hot area [Orlando, Cancun, whatever you like.] however, they didn't exactly read the website correctly, and instead of getting into a resort with a public pool, they end up getting a personal pool with their resort house. This will include Ms. Pauling because yes.

Scout:

-Immediately jumps into the pool, clothes and all.

-Says he played an 'Epic prank' on Medic by putting Ms Pauling's bikinis in his bag instead of his swimming trunks.

-Hits everyone with pool noodles for hours, apart from Spy. He can never find Spy.

-Planned a sick joke with Sniper to push Medic into the pool. [More on that later]

Soldier:

-Has to be stopped from covering himself in honey before jumping into the pool. [For the sake of that poor water filter]

-Also hits multiple people with a pool noodle and ends up sword fighting with Scout.

-Tries to take bites out of the pool noodles, as well as all the other foam items he can get his hands on.

-Refuses to take off helmet despite being halfway underwater.

Engineer:

-Stays on the sides, will occasionally jump in as long as his mechanical arm is wrapped up tight. [Water damage, yknow?]

-Adores how Pyro has so many different toys to play with by the pool, often watches over them as they play with them.

-Only one who takes photos

-Made a little beach themed watercooler near the hot tub to fill with alcohol and drinks.

Demoman:

-Ends up making personal drinks for everyone, a bartender at the hot tub.

-Absolutely destroys his skin by not wearing sunscreen, ends up walking away fried.

-Somehow sets fire to the water in the pool.

-Falls asleep in the pool at multiple points in time, sometimes face down. [Soldier flips him over, can't let him drown]

Heavy:

-Basically the lifeguard in all this chaos, wondering how the pool is simultaneously on fire and freezing. [It's Demoman and Sniper's fault]

-When he jumps in, it becomes a goddamn wave pool, and I'm talking about the ones that could drown people.

-He normally hangs out in the hot tub beside the pool, not normally going in unless it's important.

-Wants to chat to Medic, but he can never find him near the pool. Talks to Spy instead.

Sniper:

-Hangs around the deep end of the pool, hanging off the edges like spooder man.

-Never knows where Medic is during the morning and afternoons, so he decided to help Scout with a prank so he could figure out what's going on with him.

-Normally has a soft drink during the slow pool hours when everybody is relaxed.

-Threw ice into the pool when it lighted up. It did nothing.

-Like Soldier, still wears his hat despite being up to his neck in water.

Pyro:

-Refuses to even touch the water. The only time they jumped in is when the water was set alight. Loved every second of it.

-Has many water-safe unicorn toys and rubber ducks by the side of the pool to play with instead of actually going in the water.

-Keeps the mask on. Cmon, what did you expect?

-Can and will sit in the sun for the entire day if possible.

Spy:

-Stays cloaked whenever Scout comes around the pool with his pool noodle.

-When he does decide to get in the pool, the ashes of his cigarettes get in the water. Yuck.

-Wears only the finest of wool woven swimwear shorts. [That's a lie. They're silk too.]

-Found Medic one night. Drowning. Was a bit confused, but pulled him out anyway.

Medic:

-Physically does not know how to swim. Packed Ms. Pauling's bikinis instead of his own swim gear, so he didn't have to. Scout found out and pretended that it was his doing.

-Doesn't like the loud noises of the day, so usually comes out in the evening, dangling his legs into the water of the deep end.

-Comes out in full uniform like a weirdo. I'm talking about the lab coat, the white cardigan, the white shirt, the red rubber gloves, the baggy rouge/brown trousers, the black boots, all of it.

-Got pushed into the deep end by both Scout and Sniper. Started drowning, and eventually Spy found him and pulled him out.

Ms. Pauling:

-Sits by the side of the pool, usually with a martini or a cold drink.

-Got confused when she found her swimming costume inside Medic's suitcase.

-Usually dives into the pool with grace... with her glasses still on. Refuses to also take them off, due to the fact that she won't be able to see without them. [Excuses, excuses.]

-Will normally get a call from the Administrator. Everyone goes silent when this happens, due to the fact that they're supposed to be working.

Yeah, I think that turned out pretty well, but these are just headcannons. Agree if you want, but you don't have to.

:]

[sillystringpasta]

my maniacal theater kid brain spat this at me.

if epic the musical the musical ever became a thing, i pitch these as characters dances:

ody is whatever fits the scene. he's clever and adptable. he dances with the other characters, matching them. likewise, i think athena should get a mix of things implying that she taught him those styles/adaptability. she can also dance to the other gods tune in god games. if she got a seperate style of her own, i think ballet?

the crew + eurylochus is cheer. flips and lift and holds and stuff. lots of trust in that sport.

polyphemus is tap dancing. he stomps. the club makes loud smacks. it fits. (slow cramp rolls as the club hits. jump up and do a bell then fall back instead of sticking the landing when fainting from the wine.)

circe is flamenco. i envision her first other ways of persuasion fully lifing the skirt lmao, then the end having her cup her hand to her breast like she's in love. she could also do belly dancing though...

aeolus is ribbon dancing. wind god, y'know? lots of flowy movements. could also be water sleeve/long sleeve (traditional chinese dance, it's really pretty).

calypso gets tango for obvious reasons.

the sirens get some sort of syncronised swimming.

i think penelope should get salsa or swing jazz or waltz. harder and sadder without a partner, and full of passion.

telemachus has some sort of... freestyle hip hop. he had no one around to teach him, so his dancing sucks, and he improvs from athena.

[srasdoesthings]

[MONDAY 5:05 PM] - Wonder Stage, Phoenix Wonderland :･ﾟ✧:･ﾟ✧

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“Please!” A chipper voice pleads with the rest of her troupe mates. Emu bounces from where she balances herself on one of Wonder stage’s seats “It’s a nice story! And I really, really wanna see Nene-chan in a mermaid costume again…” 

Tsukasa mutters to himself: “That’s your reasoning..?” before sighing. It wasn’t a bad idea, all things considered. While darker than the shows they had done, it wasn’t too dark that parents would be opposed to showing it to kids. An interesting flip to a story known and loved by people. 

With Rui’s writing magic, they would no doubt make the original’s themes of growing up and seeing the truth of the world palatable for kids to be taken along for the ride while giving their older audiences a bittersweet tale. 

--Tsukasa had toyed with the idea of doing a more serious and emotional play recently; this could be a good opportunity to dip his toes into this sort of play.--

Though, he didn't want to let that sort of selfish reasoning sway his resolve. As the leader of a troupe, he needs to see to it that everyone is pleased. “It might work. What’re your thoughts? Rui, Nene.”

“I’m fine with it.” Nene’s focus stays on her game, only the slightest glance to the other members before flicking back to the screen. “You did say you wanted to make the new show cooler than others. Up the production and all that.”

“Considering the stunts we’ll have to perform in the story, I've no doubt it’ll be a bigger production that can still be within our means.” Rui smiles from where he’d been jotting ideas. Tsukasa can faintly see a few bullet points already, some circled and some crushed out, others underlined and others annotated. Their genius director was hooked too. The warmth of his smiles changes to that of mischief as he meets Tsukasa’s eyes. “Of course, that’s if Tsukasa-kun is willing to flung around in the air the whole show.”

“FLUNG AROUND!?”

“Duh,” Nene finally looks up properly, a sound of victory ringing from her phone. “You’re obviously going to play Peter. And what does Peter do the whole time?” Mockingly, he slows her words, almost as if explaining to a child. 

“That's…true…”

Emu, the ever cheerful soul, attacks Tsukasa with a hug, exclaiming out: “It’s okay, Tsukasa-kun! I’m gonna be the fairy, so we’ll fly around together!‘

“And if we fall?”

Her grin grows brighter and she grabs his hands, lovingly. “Then we fall together!”

Tsukasa sighs again, Emu’s silliness and cheer infects him and he can’t help but smile too, leaning into the smiling girl. “I suppose we will.”

“Now, now,” Rui steps in, a pleasing smile on his face. He holds the two close, draping his arms around them. “No one will be falling, I can assure you of that. Don’t you trust me?” Despite his resolved smile, Tsukasa can see the worry in Rui’s stance and he flashes him a smile back.

“Of course! We’re in the best of hands. Thank you, Rui.”

“Anything else we have to add?” Nene moves closer to the group, phone tucked into her pocket and shuffles beside Rui, joining the odd warmth pile they’ve made and leaning her weight on his shoulders. “Since Mr.World Star here wants a hand at more heartfelt shows, then we have to pay attention to stuff like Peter and Hook’s backstory. Ugh, there’s gonna have to be a bunch of things we’re gonna have to pace out…”

Rui nods “Mhm. And we’ll have to figure out how to convey a good chunk of the show with just the four of us.‘

“I can ask the mascots to be background characters!” Emu volunteers, standing up to jump around in excitement, waving around in joy. “Like in the epic pirate fight scene! And the Epic pirate bombing! It’ll be so wonderhoy to have everyone play together!”

“You sure?” It would be  amazing, and it would remove the worry of stretching everyone too thin, but would that be asking too much? “We don’t want to make your brothers-”

“Boo, I’ll just convince them!” Emu grins. She places both hands on Tsukasa’s cheeks, holding to his face with the warmest of smiles. “It’s to make our most wonderhoy of wonderhoy shows after all! And I’m sure we can make it the bestest if we give it a try. So I’ll put my all into convincing them, and making the stages and props and stuff!”

“Ah, that reminds me. Roles.”

Nene shifts, wrapping her arms around Tsukasa’s shoulders and leaning her head on his.“Aren’t they obvious?”

“Yes, but not just stage roles. Our production roles.” Rui Clarifies. “What would they be?”

“I can take care of costumes and choreography.” Tsukasa volunteers. “Since Emu is going to be busy with stage and more business side of things.”

“Ehhh, are you sure? Emu can handle it!” 

“No no, it’s fine.” He places a hand on Emu’s own, a smile slipping on his face. “After All, you’ll be in charge of making the stage as magical as it could ever be. And that’s a big job, right?”

“Mmm, true true.” She turns to Nene, grinning. “And Nene-chan will be there to help me, right?!”

The girl smiles, head on Rui’s shoulder. “Of course. I’ll do my best. Oh and Rui, I’ll work on the script, just pass me an outline. You’ll need to focus on the rigs.”

Rui smiles, “thank you, Nene.” He stands. “Let’s make this show amazing, everyone.”

Tsukasa grins. “Wonderhoy?”

They all smile and cheer: “Wonderhoy!”

• • •

The Portrait of Pirate F

Roles:

Tsukasa Tenma…Peter Pan (Choreographer, Costumer)

Emu Ootori…Tinkerbell ( Set Director, Producer)

Rui Kamishiro… Captain Hook (Stage Director, Machine rigger)

Nene Kusanagi… Mermaid (Assistant Director, Scriptwriter, Producer)

[herzzgeist]

2) Check Mate

Pairing: Law x fem!reader | Word count: 1.3k | Warnings: none

Dividers by cafekitsune

The penetrating sound of expanding metal heating up in the sun wakes Law from his short lived sleep. Still drowsy he looks to the night stand and reaches out for the glass of water, which tarnished due to the cold that night. Outside the corridor is the already up and about crew, preparing for their duties.

The doctor pulls himself out of the sheets and sits on the edge of his bed. "Coffee“, is the only thing he gets to grumble. What a strange night he thinks to himself. Will the day be just as curious?

He strokes through his messy raven hair and stretches his soul awake, feeling quite tense. While getting dressed he peers over at the book he wanted to take a look at before all that commotion.

With the hat now back on his head, Law flips through the pages. Hovering over some cheesy quotes, his gaze gets stuck on one: "True love is seen by the heart, not by the eye.“

In thought he narrows his eyes and closes the book. Normally these kinds of observations don’t leave a wide impression on him, but this time it's clinging to his mind. Putting the impertinent literature in his pocket, he makes his way to the kitchen.

"Hey, where's my coffee?!“ - „You just drank it you oaf!"-"Can someome please hand me the egg rice?" The gang fights it's way through the breakfast buffet . Whilst the men rowdy and shove eachother around, you and Bepo enjoy your food in the corner of the room, grinning from ear to ear.

As the Captain enters the kitchen, the door closed shut behind him for everybody to hear, he musters a dangerous glare at his disorganized crew: "Good morning“. In no time everybody is lined up and alert. Suddenly everyone is well behaved and quiet. The bear can‘t hold it in and giggles to himself while munching on a tuna sandwich. So do you, you join the low belly cramping snickering. Little tears of joy forming in the corners of your eyes.

This ends as soon as the Captain joins your table with a cup of coffee in his hands: "What are you guys being so chipper about?" - "We just love to see your epic entrance, Captain.“, you explain to him taking a bite off your chocolate croissant.

Disgust makes itself vacant on Law's face, seeing you chomping down the pastry. To your notice you apologize. trying to set it aside. "Don't worry, as long as I don't have to eat it“, he reassures you, taking a few sips of his strong brewed coffee.

Bepo jumps in with a proud grin: "Captain, I found the monster this morning and brought it outside. Though I was really scared it would bite me I used all my courage to bring it to safety!“

You observe how Law's stern face turns softer to the slightest, feeling yourself smile timidly in response. "Way to go, Bepo", he praises with a hint of delight. It's more than his usual deep monotone voice.

The mink happily goes to the buffet for a second round. Or was it his third? You couldn't tell anymore. After all, he's a bear, of course he needs a certain amount of food to function.

"You two still need something?" - "Oh, an Onigiri please." the man asks his Vice Commander, but gets a shaking head as an answer: „I believe we’re out of that, Captain." Not sure why, but the crew had an intense hunger today, leaving the kitchen crumbless. One thing is certain, you had to go grocery shopping to fill the stock again this afternoon.

Law sighs waving off Bepo: "Well, back to the off-". Without a word you tug on his sleeve, getting his attention. You rummage in your bag and put a freshly packed Onigiri on the table: "Please take it. I can fetch my lunch in town".

Eyeing the rice ball on the table he declines, but his rumbling stomach tells you otherwise. It‘s almost like a whale lives in there. "Always so humble“, you smirk at him and give the Onigiri a little nudge in his direction.

Though embarrassed he takes it, lowers the tip of his hat and mumbles a low: „Thank you“. You adored his soft side peeking through the stone cold wall he built around himself. The tips of his ears turn the slightest bit red. It was reward enough for you.

Unexpectedly, Law's steel colored eyes fixated on you while you took a sip of your hot bevarage: „What happend to your forehead?" Pointing at his own he tries to turn your attention to yours, mirroring you.

Shyly the fingertips of your hand hover over the bump that comes out through your hair. "Oh that? Uh…at kitchen duty I hit my head at the narrow shelf back in the storage this morning.“, you explain, a sweat drop forming on your temple.

He's gonna know, he’s gonna know, ran through your head. Nervously bouncing your leg you smile as if nothing happend. Boy are you bad at this. To Trafalgar's amusement he smirks, putting his white hat aside and shifts the black strands out of his face: „What a coincidence. After a nightly walk through the sub, Bepo nearly gave me a concussion again. I can’t keep track of how many times this happend already.“

Acting wasn’t your strong suit. It never has been. With an overreacted gasp you lean in closer taking a better look at his head. It’s too obvious (Y/n)-ya, he thought.

„Was it the monster Bepo talked about?“, you ask briefly while taking another sip of your cup. The man nods grinning to himself: " Yes, a cockroach crawled onto his bed." - "Wasn’t it a spider?". You swallow empty. The surgeon of death has you right where he wants you.

„Oh yeah, right. It was. How did you know?“ - „Oh, umm…y‘know. Intuition?“ This isn’t going well for you. In awkwardness you scratch your neck and chuckle like a little girl.

There's still hope, you ask about his night and if he even took a shut eye. Smoothing his smile he stretches his inked fingers. Damn those fingers! Law plays his cards elegantly: „Just the usual. Worked on a mountain of reports and started a…"good" read before the walk." Poor you, walking right into his trap. "Which book did you start?“, you ask, his fingers hypnotizing you to a certain extent.

It tears you out of your focus as his hand slips into his jacket pocket pulling out a very specific bundle of paper. The Captain puts it on the table infront of you. Your face grows pale. It's your book. Law flatout hums triumphantly as he unpacks the Onigiri and takes a big bite of it. Check mate.

Game over, you can’t talk yourself out of this one. Page after page you flip through the book playing coy: „Interesting. Since when are you into such things?". The man suppresses a chuckle, trying to meet your gaze. Nonetheless he doesn't reply, making you shuffle in your seat.

After a short while which felt like an hour he finally replies, his deep voice nearly vibrating in your ears: "I have a hunch who this might interest more-", you rapidly turn your head to the side and hold your hand around your ear shell to exaggerate a listening gesture: "What was that Penguin? You need help with the plates? Sure thing, yes!“.

In a rush you heave yourself out of your seat and begin to gather the dirty dishes from your table: "Sorry Captain, duty‘s calling.“ This confirms his thesis. You were that shadow running from him and you definitly know something about this book.

The doctor only gives you a knowing sneer, dismissing you with a nod: "Well, back to the office I guess.“

So, will the day be just as curious? Yes, it definitely will be. After your little conversation, Law was certain this isn't over yet.

[satoshi-mochida]

Tchia coming to Switch this summer, Steam version now available

From Gematsu

Awaceb will release Tchia for Switch this summer and is available today for PC via Steam, the developer announced.

Tchia first launched for PlayStation 5, PlayStation 4, and PC via Epic Games Store on March 21, 2023.

The Steam version launched with the following new content:

Soul Melodies

Spawn Food – Immediately summon a—frankly ridiculous—amount of food in a circle around you, to replenish your stamina. Stash the leftovers in your backpack for later! It’s fast food the Tchia way!

Random Cosmetics – Don’t spend hours fretting over your outfit—let the game decide. Who says you can’t wear a shark hat with a clown outfit? Not us, that’s for sure. This randomizes all of your cosmetics :)

Acrobat Mode – Why jump a reasonable height when you could jump a completely ridiculous height and distance? Spin in the air faster and pull off the best flips and tricks you could possibly imagine.

Human Torch – Become fire! Your slingshot will be able to shoot fireballs, and every object you touch EXPLODES! Super good for clearing camps.

Super Boat – Your boat can go super duper fast with this. Fun for exploration, and for doing super quick sea zoomies. The fish will be in awe.

Invoke Boat – Forgot where you parked your sea vessel? Worry not. Summon a boat whenever needed, and sail the seas without a care.

Cosmetic Perks

Attract Animals – Wear a full outfit of a certain animal, and you’ll suddenly find them following you wherever possible! Lead a gang of sharks, crabs, or cows, or birds, or—well, any animal in Tchia. Has no benefit other than looking super cool.

Comfort Setting

Infinite Soul-Meter – You will be able to find this in your comfort settings. Tired of your Soul Meter depleting? Here’s a way for you to play soul melodies to your hearts content without the bar ever going down… Be a bird forever, the sky’s the limit!

Here is an overview of the game, via its store pages:

About

When an idyllic series of islands is attacked by strange fabric-made creatures who kidnap her father, a young girl named Tchia answers the call of adventure to rescue her family and her home. Tchia has plenty of tools at her disposal, ranging from a simple slingshot to the ability to jump into nearby creatures and objects. Called Soul Jumping, this power lets Tchia control animals. She can soar high in the sky as a seagull or swim through beautiful blue oceans as a fish. Using these abilities and more, Tchia fights off the monsters that have taken over her home and helps the island’s inhabitants. Jump into this love-letter to New Caledonia, a bright adventure filled with tender moments, beautiful vistas, charming characters, and a story that contends with a young person’s place in the world.

Key Features

Soul Jumping – Tchia’s special gift lets her take control of various animals and objects scattered across the island. By using their unique abilities, she can solve puzzles and uncover secrets.

Exploration And Travel – Tchia can jump and glide her way across a vast archipelago and use a Tricks system to do fancy dives and cool stunts. Tchia‘s free-climbing mechanic also lets Tchia clamber up anything she wants, including the game’s physics-driven trees.

Ukelele – Whether she’s by herself or with a group of friends, Tchia can bust out her ukulele for some guaranteed good times. It can be used at key story moments or to trigger certain events, like attracting animals or even changing the weather.

Story and Music – Over the course of her heartfelt adventure, Tchia will meet her island’s people, a group inspired by New Caledeonia’s culture. With animated cutscenes that are fully voiced in New Caledonia’s traditional language, players will be teleported into a unique and immersive world.

Customization and Items – Tchia’s clothes and her boat can be customized with hundreds of unlockable cosmetic items ranging from traditional garbs to more outlandish get ups.

New Caledonia – The world of Tchia is inspired by New Caledonia, a tiny island in the Pacific Ocean and the homeland of Awaceb’s co-founders. Inspiration was taken from the rich and varied local landscapes, cultures, music, languages, folklores and traditions to create a fictional world and tell a universal story that anyone can understand and enjoy. The characters re voiced by local talent in traditional languages and subtitled in many languages including English, French, Russian, Chinese, German and more.

Watch a new trailer below.

New Features And Switch Announce Trailer

[x--daughters-of-darkness--x]

“I was a raging alcoholic!”: Jonathan Davis meets Amy Lee

Two iconic rock stars, one epic interview – Evanescence’s Amy Lee and Korn’s Jonathan Davis talk fame, nu metal and living on the edge

On the surface, Jonathan Davis and Amy Lee don’t appear to have much in common. While Korn’s vocalist is best known for purging his psyche and utilising pure rage to fuel his art, Evanescence bandleader Amy is a classically trained multi-instrumentalist. To an outsider, the primal roar of Korn and the vast, intricately crafted swell of Evanescence could seem worlds apart.

In reality, the two share many similarities. Both have endured childhood trauma, which colours the music they make, giving Korn and Evanescence an honesty that connects with their fans on a massive scale. Both the bands they front have survived well beyond the nu metal tag of their early years, and are now thought of as unique artists in their own right – latest albums Requiem and The Bitter Truth charted in the Top 10 in the UK and the Top 20 in the US. Both have experimented beyond the boundaries of those bands, entering into film scoring and classical work. And, as we find out when we join a Zoom call with the pair in the aftermath of their recent co-headlining tour across the US – where they teamed up to perform Freak On A Leash together each night – both have an immense amount of respect and affection for each other.

We’ve been granted a rare opportunity to converse with two giants of the metal world. But, as Jonathan sits with his brand-new puppy on his lap – a subject that dominates the first few minutes of our conversation, and leads to Amy telling us that she’s in the process of getting a kitten – today feels far more like an informal catch-up than a rock star state of address.

Can you remember the first time you heard each other’s music?

Amy: “Gosh! I’m not sure what the first song was, but it was in high school for me!”

Jonathan: “You’re already making me feel old!”

Amy: “It was like nothing that I had ever heard. We all have certain artists in our life that we hear and they have a spark, they have an impact. Korn was absolutely one of those artists for me. The music was coming from a real place. So, I became a fan right away. My favourite album was [2002’s] Untouchables.”

Jonathan: “That’s so surreal for me. I still trip out on it. You have to remember that I was this green kid from Bakersfield, but we relocated to Huntington Beach. I gave up my whole life to live my dream, and I can’t believe that this thing we did could be so impactful. We were just doing our own thing, these punk kids telling everyone to fuck off – and we’ve gone through our entire career like that! Even the name! Who names their band Korn, man?! And to hear Amy say she first heard us in high school and… now look at what she is doing!”

Amy: “That’s what metal is, that’s what rock is supposed to be, that nonconformist attitude. ‘This is what this is supposed to look like? Well, I’m not gonna do that!’ The whole idea is that you are meant to break the mould.”

Jonathan: “I remember driving around in my car and their song [Bring Me To Life] came on, and I flipped, I thought it was cool. Listen… I hate everything, man, but I loved her voice. I liked that there was a girl doing some rock music and it was badass.”

You both had to shake off the tag of nu metal around that time as well…

Amy: “I have a feeling Jonathan may feel the same, but I don’t like boxes. As artists we are unique. The real value in something is being who you are and not trying to fit into a certain genre. I want the freedom to make whatever music comes out of my soul. When [2003 debut album] Fallen came out, I was fresh out of school and I was like a cartoon of myself; it felt like nobody got me, it was just a 2-D representation of me based on people only knowing a couple of songs. I really struggled with that.”

Jonathan: “For me, we were making Untouchables, and that was when so many bands were coming out and jumping on the bandwagon. Now I don’t mind the tag ‘nu metal’ – they named an entire subgenre after my band? Holy shit! That’s cool! – but punk-ass, crazy Korn back then, we were like, ‘What the fuck? Fuck everyone! We’re going to make this insane record.’ Keep people guessing. It had become a parody of itself – I don’t want to be defined like that! Nowadays, I don’t care, but back then, I hated it. I make the music I make… you don’t call Metallica some thrash band! They’re fucking Metallica! You don’t call the Chili Peppers a funk rock band! They’re the fucking Chili Peppers! And Korn are Korn!”

Amy: “Exactly! You did it, there is only one Korn!”

Both of you seem to really dig deep into your personal lives and experiences to make music.

Amy: “That’s what sticks, that’s what stays, that’s what really touches people. Not the bullshit. It’s when you’re really taking a chance and speaking from the heart. I want to feel something real when I listen to music – it’s food for the soul, to feel not alone in the universe. When it comes to the bands that really stick, they’re the ones that really put everything out there.”

Jonathan: “For sure. Kids have bullshit detectors; they can hear that shit a mile away.”

Amy: “We had to fight the power with labels and stuff throughout my career. It’s always been a fight. Not now, I fought my fights…”

Jonathan: “And you won!”

Amy: “I did! The fights were always for the fans’ intelligence. They are not as stupid as the industry thinks they are! We’re going to give them something real, and it can’t be fake… anything but that! That turned into fights about real strings versus synthesisers. I knew we had to spend the money to make it sound right, because I knew it was what I would have wanted as a fan.”

Jonathan: “I feel the same. We were lucky, because we always told them that it was going to be our way or no way. We got into fights with magazines, fights with video directors, literal physical altercations, because we were so sure that it wasn’t going to go down like that.”

Amy: “‘Y’all want a single, say fuck that!’”

Jonathan: “Exactly!”

Amy: “When [Korn’s] Y’all Want A Single came out [in 2003], it really affected me again. I was like, ‘These people get me! This is my people!’”

Jonathan: “When the managers said, ‘We gotta try and get a single,’ we were like, ‘OK, here’s your single!”

Amy: “[To Hammer] They play that song every night, usually near the end before the encore, and we are all always side of the stage like, ‘Oh boy! Here we go!’ It’s always one of our favourite songs to warm up to before we go on, too.”

Is it hard for both of you to get into a place where you have to deliver such personal material every night?

Jonathan: “It’s like a switch flicks in my mind and I go to that place. Honestly, I kind of enjoy it. Most of the time I’m happy as fuck, but when I hear my band, and there’s a crowd, and it’s loud as fuck, I go there. I feed that to the people that want it, and they purge it and they let it out and it’s a huge release. I need it to get whatever is inside of me out, but by the end of the tour I’m so exhausted I can barely walk. I’m in hell, I want to go home and sleep for two weeks. But I need it, it’s therapy.”

Amy: “It’s a release, and there are days when you don’t feel like going onstage. But, without fail, when you get to the point where you walk up onto that stage and something takes over, it’s purifying.”

Jonathan: “Totally. I’ve said, ‘I’m gonna go on autopilot!’ so many times and…”

Amy: “Never gonna happen!”

Jonathan, how difficult was it to do Daddy live for the first time in 2015, on the 20th anniversary of your self-titled debut?

Jonathan: “I felt like I robbed the world of doing that live for so long. I felt like I owed it to our fans that were hardcore enough to come and see us on the 20th anniversary of that album, but I don’t wanna do it again. Going out and touring that record, I realised how dark it is – it’s some depressing shit. As we got into Follow The Leader, it became more about groove. The emotion was there, but it wasn’t that particular darkness we captured on that first record. In a few years, it’s the 30th anniversary and… I don’t think I wanna go through that again. It was difficult, and I think I was proving to myself that I could do it too.”

You both had to deal with an intense level of fame early on in your careers. How was that?

Jonathan: “I became a raging alcoholic. You can’t go anywhere, you can’t do anything, you have to have a fucking bodyguard 24 hours a day. Crazy shit. Still to this day, it’s tough, but that’s what we signed up for. Everyone in Korn went a bit nuts in the late 90s.”

Amy: “It was a hard adjustment. I was 21 [when Bring Me To Life came out], and I was often the only female anywhere. In my mind I thought, ‘That doesn’t matter!’, but you do start to feel alone. It wasn’t just about being female. Like I was talking about – it was that you start seeing the cartoon of yourself, the album cover version, the interview version. How can you feel like everyone knows me… but nobody knows me…? We’ve grown up and times have changed, but in the beginning it was scary. I used a lot of that as inspiration for the second album [The Open Door, released in 2006]. Billie Eilish’s second album does that too, and I found myself really relating to a lot of that.”

Jonathan: “It was hard for my little boy, Nathan. People would rush me and he would start crying, because all he knew was that ‘This is my daddy and this is my daddy time.’ He would cry and I’d have to say to this person, ‘Yo, I’m with my kid.’ And they go away pissed off. It’s mentally taxing. I know Amy can relate, but most people can’t.”

Amy: “Yeah, you’re ungrateful!”

Jonathan: “‘You’re an ungrateful fuck, fuck you! I’m burning your CDs!’ That sort of shit.”

Do you remember meeting each other for the first time?

Amy: “I do. It was at a festival, I guess. I was too nervous to knock on the door. So, I wrote a note saying how big a deal it was to have played with them, pushed it under the door and was happy to leave it at that. But they chased me down. Their security guy came and got me and brought me in. You were really nice to me, Jonathan, you were like, ‘Hey come on in, sit down!’ It was really sweet. Do you remember that now?”

Jonathan: “Yeah, I do now. I haven’t thought about that for years!”

Amy: “Fast-forward a few years and we’re doing Family Values [in 2007], and they really taught me how to have fun on tour. There was one night where I was stood by our bus, and suddenly these golf carts came out of nowhere, and all of Korn are on them and they say, ‘Hey! We’re gonna go let off some fireworks!’ It was just like they were still kids. There was something really pure about that.”

Jonathan: “That’s the whole reason we become artists, so that we can remain kids. Not to conform to what society tells us we have to be. I’m a 51-year-old kid. I remember that tour now. It was us and you, Trivium…”

Amy: “I remember Atreyu was on that tour and… Flyleaf, and Hellyeah.”

With Atreyu and Trivium on that Family Values tour, did it feel like there was something of a sea change happening in heavy music?

Amy: “Music has changed all along the way, and I think that is a good thing. That’s what keeps it interesting and genuine.”

Jonathan: “I just like anyone that is nice to me!”

Amy: “Ha ha ha! I had such a great time with you guys on this last tour! Coming back after doing that Family Values tour, what, 15 years later, it actually means more. After the pandemic, the passion from the audience to the bands and the crew, it was a moment of coming full circle. You get older and you recognise that time is fleeting, and we’re very lucky to have that moment and to have each other.”

What did you think of Amy’s cover of Korn song Thoughtless in 2004, Jonathan?

Jonathan: “I LOVED it! I loved how you broke it down and really got the chord progression and the melody; I wrote that fucking thing on an acoustic guitar in my room in Arizona, when we moved to go and write [for Untouchables]. I locked myself in my room and I would just write all night. I came up with that riff, I played the drums on the demo, I laid it all down, and I just love that she made it so… beautiful. Then when you put it out [on 2004 live album Anywhere But Home], they didn’t put the [Parental Advisory] sticker on it…”

Amy: “Oh yeah! They ripped it out of Walmart! Ha ha ha!”

Jonathan: “All because some uptight Christian family were pissed at the language on there!”

Amy: “It didn’t have the parental sticker and they said, ‘What? I thought Evanescence was a Christian band?’”

Jonathan: “Exactly, all that shit. I was going, ‘Yes!’ I love that.”

Amy: “It’s one of my favourite songs. I think the thing with metal is, it still needs to have a melody for me, and something I love about Korn is their beautiful melodies. When we started this tour I said, ‘We gotta do some collab! You can pretty much pick any song!’ I was really inspired by Tori Amos. She’s done a million covers, and she showed me that you can take pretty much any song and give it a whole new perspective and make you hear the lyrics in a different way. She did this cover of Smells Like Teen Spirit, and she gave it this deep pain. And Korn have done so many cool covers over the years…”

Obviously, you did Freak On A Leash on the Korn MTV Unplugged set too, Amy. It aired in 2007. How did that come about?

Jonathan: “I do not remember…”

Amy: “You guys just asked me! I was like, ‘Hell yeah, I’m gonna do a Korn song!’”

Jonathan: “You know what’s funny about that? Originally, we were going to do a mash-up with Metallica as the last song, but they were in the studio and couldn’t leave. My second choice was The Cure [who performed Make Me Bad / In Between Days].”

Amy: “I remember Robert Smith was there!”

Jonathan: “They all were! And that freaked me out, because that’s my band right there. But we knew we wanted to have guests, and so we asked Amy, because of the Thoughtless cover, and we wanted people to hear Freak On A Leash stripped right down. It was so intimate, we wanted to have people hear the actual melodies. We didn’t really rehearse, remember?”

Amy: “I feel like we ran through it once or twice, but I’m a practiser – I had run through it a whole bunch of times at home.”

Jonathan: “Well, I appreciate that… because I’m not! Ha ha ha! I just gotta feel it!”

And not many people would have believed that metal could translate to an acoustic style in that way, either…

Jonathan: “Nobody believed we could pull it off! It was the most intricate thing we had ever done. We had all these extra musicians, strings, a glockenspiel player, the glass harmonica player. ‘Korn can’t do Unplugged!’ ‘Yeah? We fucking can, watch this!’ We had to look at what Korn is really about, it’s about me purging my demons, but we did exactly what we wanted, and we wanted to come out of leftfield. A lot of people hated it but we really didn’t care!”

Amy: “Anything great that comes out of nowhere is always going to get people going, ‘Nah! Hated it!’ But to bring everything full circle, for me to get to do that every night on stage [on our recent tour], to do the heavy version, was such an honour. I’ve always wanted to do that.”

Jonathan: “It was great, too. Everyone loved it every night.”

Amy: “It felt like the ultimate celebration every night, right at the end of the encore after a night of so much love. I’m going to miss doing that.”

At this point, our time is up, and Amy and Jonathan quickly make plans to speak again soon. It’s been a trip learning about their journeys and how they’ve connected over the years, and before we go, we ask both icons what they most admire about each other.

“I respect the shit out of how she can sit down in front of a piano and make such beautiful music,” Jonathan immediately replies. “I respect her as a musician and a person totally.”

Amy beams, before answering, “It’s interesting… he was a legend before, and now we’re friends. That’s a weird way to start. It’s amazing to me. He’s a rad, down-to-earth, normal person with an amazing talent. It’s that simple.”

And with that, these two friends, so different on the face of it but so similar at their core, bid us farewell.

[umichenginabroad]

Madrid Week 18: Ultimate Guide to Madrid

Hola a todxs!! 

Foreward to this super ultimate epic guide: I started this when I was in Madrid. I’m finishing the blog now, over a month later. Is my memory as sharp? No, but maybe that’s a good thing — only the most memorable things will make the list :). Hopefully this guide helps, even in its immensity! Onwards.

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Introduction

I think this post may be one of the most useful ones to any prospective study-abroaders who end up choosing Madrid as their destination. I hope that it's equally as useful to someone who might want to travel there for vacation. I wanted to pour as much of my knowledge of Madrid into this post -- a kind of all-encompassing guide, if you will. Of course, this will be nowhere near all-encompassing, because Madrid is an incredibly large city with endless things to do.

Nonetheless, I did my best to capture things I’ve experienced and learned from living here for 5 months, from January to June. This guide will be separated into sections/lists, and it will be long af (what’s new).

Also of note, I’ll mention “CEA” a few times in this post, which was the study abroad program I was involved with in Madrid. This guide still applies if you’re not with CEA, and it still applies if you’re not studying there. 

By no means is this post meant to be read from start to finish, but the information is all here so you can pick and choose what to focus on yourself. Let’s jump in.

Notes About Culture

Generally, Spaniards tend to live life at a slower pace than Americans. Mealtimes are later and longer, people value rest and time with loved ones very highly, and punctuality isn’t as important (in social situations). In general, this follows suit with the Mediterranean lifestyle, similar to Italy and Greece (my roots <3). Of course, it’s hard to say exactly what it would be like living in Spain as a real person instead of an exchange student studying there for 5 months, but I really loved Spanish culture.

Moving to Spain will certainly come with a culture shock, but many things are very similar to the USA — both are ‘Western’ cultures, so you won’t be flipping your entire way of life upside down (maybe just sideways). Anything I could say, you’ll find out yourself firsthand (most of the big differences will be explained in a study abroad orientation anyways). 

Adapting to and learning how to exist in this new culture was one of the most enjoyable and rewarding things I experienced in my time in Spain. Embrace the discomfort of it all and be kind to yourself, and I think you’ll experience the same!

A couple things I thought of randomly that I wish I knew beforehand:

You pay for your grocery bags. Don’t accidentally steal them and get called out by the cashier (embarrassing) (who would make that mistake…)

Madrid’s tap water is incredible (the locals will make sure you know that). Don’t pay for bottled water, ask for agua del grifo (tap) or un vaso (glass) de agua.

Public Transportation

One of my favorite things about Madrid? Its metro system. It is extremely well connected (and reliable), so much so that you’re never more than a 30 minute trip away from almost anywhere you could want to go around the city center. Combined with its pedestrian focused urban planning, this makes Madrid extremely walkable, which really improved my quality of life and happiness here (do better, US cities). Trains come really frequently, and the system is intuitive and easy to use.

Past the metro, Madrid also has a bus system and a regional above ground train system called Cercanias. I used the Cercanias to get to Leganes and Getafe, where UC3M’s campuses are located. The Cercanias are also very reliable, usually running on time and as expected. The buses are a tiny bit less reliable, but honestly I didn’t have to use the buses that often — metro covers most of the city.

Important things to know about the public transportation: 

It costs 8 euros (!) a month for adolescents under 25. This works for all public transportation in Madrid (not just the capital city of Madrid, the entire region). You need to have a special metrocard for this with your identity on it, which you can get by making an appointment with the metro company. More info here. Many study abroad programs (CEA included) will do this for you if you give them the right information in time.

The metro runs from 6 a.m. to 1.30 a.m. It’s very safe at night. Be aware of pickpockets at all times, especially on crowded metros.

The Cercania runs from 5am to 12am. Careful taking the Cercania alone at night when you’re far out from Madrid’s city center, the farther away you are from Madrid city center the weirder the people get (speaking from experience).

The buses run all day, and less frequently at night. Ditto on weird people on night buses, especially far out.

Settling in & Shopping

Where do you buy the essentials to get set up in Madrid the first week or so? Two recommendations:

Primark: Huge department store, they have a home section with a bunch of cheap stuff with pretty much anything you might need to get set up (towels, bedding, homey stuff, etc). Probably not the best for the environment but very good for your bank account.

El Corte Ingles: Corte Ingles is another huge department store common in Spain. The stuff here is a bit pricier, so I wouldn’t recommend getting things like linens here. It is great, however, for electric appliances (hair dryers, electric razor, straighteners —  Do NOT plug your appliances from the USA into the wall [don’t bring them], the voltage difference will fry your shit [rip my razor]), school supplies, etc. Some Corte Ingleses also have grocery stores in them — maybe on the pricier side, but still relatively very cheap compared to USA.

How do you set up your phone to work in Spain? There are plenty of options, but the one that I chose was an eSim from Holafly. If your phone is newer, you can download the Holafly app and get a new sim card digitally. Holafly is great if you anticipate using unlimited data -- you can get unlimited data that works across Europe (not just Spain) for $90 for 3 months.

Also, check out City Life Madrid and Smart Insiders. These organizations offer help/resources for internationals in Madrid. Check them out if you’re looking for housing, community, financial/legal guidance, etc. They have a ton on their websites.

Los Barrios

Madrid, much like many other cities, is split up into barrios (neighborhoods). Each one has a distinct vibe, but it all feels really cohesive (unlike Barcelona, which I talked about in a previous post). Madrid has their own website with great information, but here I’ll provide some more personal takes about each one. This isn’t all encompassing — there are more barrios that I didn’t mention!

Sol: The historic city center. This is where you’ll find all the most typical touristy stuff, which is awesome and definitely a must see. I lived directly in the Puerta del Sol, which is smack dab in the center of it all. Sol gets really crowded on the weekends, especially during tourist season, so it’s best to explore during the week or at odd hours. My best recommendation for exploring the area? Rick Steves tour! He does an amazing job, per usual, and I highly recommend it. Check out the listen tab and scroll down a bit for the audio tour and the map (free). The streets surrounding Sol are a bit pricier and more touristy, but there are still a ton of great options for nightlife and food (especially tapas).

Gran Via: The main street in Madrid, with all your big brand name stores. Some of the most beautiful architecture is there. Super busy big city vibes. I <3 the Schweppes sign.

Malasaña: Trendier neighborhood. Tons of thrift stores, cool bars, sweet cafes, tight streets, and generally great energy. Plaza dos de Mayo has great vibes at night too.

Chueca: Right next to Malasana, they are really similar. Chueca has a bit more shopping. It’s also the gay neighborhood of Madrid, you’ll find many queer-friendly shops and bars here.

La Latina: Probably my favorite place to walk around in the city, feels very open. La Latina has a ton of terraces, bars, and cute restaurants, perfect for a springtime outdoor meal. To me, it feels less trendy and more like, ooh yeah Spain. If that makes sense. El Rastro happens here.

Lavapies: A really pretty neighborhood. Very hilly with colorful houses, nice plazas, and cute cafes. Lavapies is a predominantly immigrant neighborhood, and consequently they have great African and South Asian restaurants.

Las Letras: Another great neighborhood for an evening stroll. Kind of feels like a mix between Malasana and La Latina, tight streets but still a ton of terraces. There are words on the ground with some cool history behind them too.

Salamanca: Little bit more high end neighborhood. Newer too, so there’s a grid system (makes it feel a bit less walkable, but it’s still nice). Didn’t spend too much time here, but there are some good restaurants and fancy shops to be found.

Madrid Rio: South of the city. Some really pretty walking paths. The place to be if you rollerblade.

Moncloa: Moncloa has a ton of chill, cheap bars. It’s right next to a ton of universities, so you’ll find a ton of young people hanging around here. Good vibes.

Chamberi: A really lovely vibe. Very chill, older and more traditional architecture, with some authentic cafes and bars for some tapas. Great for a walk (as well).

Attractions

Here is a non-exhaustive list of some of the major attractions to see/do in Madrid. Like I mentioned above, the Rick Steves tour gives a great overview the the most obvious stuff around the center.

See also the related google maps list: Cool Spots in Madrid 

Royal Palace: The Royal Palace of Madrid is the largest palace in Western Europe, and is 100% worth it to see the inside — it’s extremely ornate and beautiful. Make sure you book tickets pretty far in advance, because they do sell out (and you don’t want to wait in an extremely long line). I’ve had friends also book group tours which they said were worth it.

Puerta del Sol: See ‘Sol’ in the neighborhoods above. The literal center of the city (and country). You can’t miss it. 

Gran Via: Also see the section above. Also can’t miss it. But so beautiful. Definitely see it at night and day, all the buildings are lit up at night and the signs are so iconic.

Plaza Mayor: Old square. Very pretty. Look a bit closer at the walls to see the paintings, they’re underrated.

Retiro: The biggest park in Madrid. More on this in the parks section. Fantastic vibes year round.

Faro de Moncloa: Not enough people know about this! A huge tower in Moncloa that gives you panoramic views of the entire city. Very cheap and worth seeing once.

Chocolatería de San Ginés: Historic Churro restaurant, must try. Bomb af. Lines get long at peak hours. Open 24 hours on weekends (check their hours beforehand), which is so clutch after a late night out.

El Rastro: Huge flea market in La Latina. Happens every Sunday morning to afternoon. A good amount of touristy stuff, but a ton of great thrifting, artisans, and antiques as well!

Mercado de Motores: Huge market/fair that happens once a month in the train museum of Madrid — art, thrift, food, concerts. I never got to see it because I didn’t plan ahead — it happens infrequently so look it up in advance if it’s something you want to see.

Flamenco (Tablao las Carboneras): Flamenco is a must see while in Spain, IMO. Totally improvised, epic rhythms, very unique and exciting. Tablao Las Carboneras is the venue I went to — they rotate out the dancers and are very authentic. CEA takes you to one (for free!). Bonus points if you see Flamenco in the Andalusia region, where it originated.

Bull Fight (Las Ventas): Another incredibly unique cultural experience in Madrid. I went to one at Las Ventas arena, and I’m not going to sugarcoat it — it was brutal. 6 bulls get killed at a show, and it’s really sad to see it happen. Simultaneously, the whole experience was unforgettable. Bull fighting is kind of like a look into the past. It’s one of the few remaining blood sports that is still accepted and celebrated in the world (by some — many people protest it), and the entire event is rooted in centuries old tradition. The event I went to was nearly full, and seemingly all Spaniards. Not something I would go back to, but something I’m glad I experienced.

Templo de Debod: An Egyptian temple reconstructed on top of a hill in Madrid. The temple is cool, but the sunsets at the park that surrounds it are cooler. Every night, people gather here to watch the sunset go down over a beautiful view of the city & the Royal Palace. There is always great energy, buskers, and people singing/dancing. In the warmer months tons will bring a blanket and some food for a picnic. 10/10 vibes.

Catedral de Santa María: Another cathedral in Europe (you will see many). Right next to the Royal Palace. This one’s not a must see — but it’s free to enter and the stained glass / painted ceilings have a really colorful modern look to them that’s pretty unique out of the many cathedrals I saw in Europe.

Santiago Bernabeu Stadium: Real Madrid’s stadium. I never visited, but people say it’s epic. You can book tours there. Real Madrid games are really expensive, but if you can snag tickets (look ahead for cheaper games), the environment is insane.

Food

I won’t go into too much detail here either. The classic dishes can be found all across the city (and country), and you’ll get to know them quickly.  I loved the food in Spain, and the tapas lifestyle never got old. A couple notes:

Spanish food puts emphasis on the ingredients that make up the dish and shies away from using a ton of spices.

Spanish food is highly regional. Depending on the city/province you’re in, you can find very different specialized dishes. Look them up beforehand, and try the specialties!! They’re always better in their region of origin.

Spanish ham is the best ham. They feed the Iberian pigs acorns

Tortilla in spain is not a flat flour yummy thing. It’s more like an omelet. Better with onions.

Spaniards don’t really do spice. The normal takis (the purple fuego ones) you buy in the USA are labeled as the EXTREME MAXIMUM SPICE level in Spain. The other flavors with less spicy levels are still pretty good though.

Here’s a google maps list of restaurants and whatnot that I tried out when I was in Madrid (and some other Spanish cities): Restaurantes de España

Mercados

Madrid has a ton of great food markets that are nice for a friendly hangout, a grocery run, a lunch, dinner, etc. Each has a distinct vibe and some awesome food.

Mercado de San Miguel: This is probably the most famous market in Madrid. It’s really old, cool example of cast iron architecture, and will top many lists of attractions in Madrid. It’s right next to la Plaza Mayor in Sol. This is definitely the most expensive and touristy food market of all the ones on this list, but the food there is really good, and there’s a ton of awesome traditional Spanish options. I’d recommend going at an off time — otherwise you won’t find a seat. Look out for the giant severed fish heads sitting on ice in the corner.

Mercado de la Cebada: El Mercado de la Cebada is right in the heart of La Latina, and has a much more laid back, local vibe when compared to San Miguel. You can get quality meats and cheeses here, along with other ingredients you might be looking for. It’s also huge, and has as many restaurants as chill bars where you can grab a drink with friends.

Mercado de San Ildefonso: San Ildefonso is around the Malasaña area, and totally fits that vibe. The space is a lot more industrial, and has plenty of seating and tons of great food options (some spanish, some international — it’s kind of like a gourmet food court). The options here don’t sell groceries/ingredients, only meals.

Mercado Anton Martin: Similar vibe to la Cebada — a mix of (some really cute) restaurants, bars, and ingredients, but much smaller. The space itself isn’t dressed up as nice as San Miguel or San Ildefonso, but that brings some of its charm. Great if you want to buy some ingredients without feeling overwhelmed with options.

Yatai Market: An asian street food market near the center of Madrid. There are options here from a ton of cultures, and while I wasn’t blown away by the food, it was good, and the vibes were nice. If there’s a specific Asian dish you’re missing from home, they probably have it.

Cool/Iconic Landmarks

Madrid in itself is iconic, but there are a couple of memorable landmarks that I think are worth seeing (and whose image will be etched in my mind for eternity).

Palacio/Fuente de Cibeles: My favorite building in Madrid, with the fountain right in front. The palace bathed in golden hour light is required viewing.

Puerta de Alcalá: Right next to Cibeles/Retiro, a massive gate. Super cool. Also great in golden hour.

Metropolis: One of the most iconic and recognizable buildings, right at the entrance of Gran Via. Very photogenic.

El Oso y el Madroño: A sculpture of a bear and a strawberry tree in Puerta del Sol, representing the coat of arms of Madrid. Very cute.

Schweppes Sign: Yes, it’s just a billboard, right on Gran Via. But I liked it a lot. Wait for night and it lights up in fun colored patterns.

Tio Pepe: Another billboard, in Puerta del Sol. But an old billboard (Tio Pepe is a brand of wine). You can’t miss it.

Palacio de Cristal: Deep in Retiro Park, a glass “palace” that faces a lake. You’ll have to look for this one.

Las Ventas: Even if you don’t go to watch a bullfight, this building is really beautiful to visit! A bit out of the way, something you’ll probably only see if you seek out.

Puerta de Europa: A less visited part of the city for tourists, but worth seeing if you have the time and energy. This is located in the Financial District north of the city, which doesn’t have too much else except cool buildings, but the buildings are very cool. This was a stop on a rollerblading route I took once — highly recommend visiting it on wheels.

Museums

Madrid has a ton of amazing museums. The most important thing to note upfront? Many of them offer free entry for students. Do your research beforehand to make sure you’re not paying when you don’t need to! For almost all of these, I would recommend reserving tickets in advance to avoid lines, unless you’re going on a weekday in the offseason. Some museums also have periods of time where they let everyone in for free. Avoid these times — lines get insanely long, and you will probably wait a few hours unnecessarily.

Museo del Prado: Classical art, one of the big three in the “Art Triangle”. A beautiful building that has tons of super iconic paintings, especially from Spaniards (Goya, Velazquez, El Greco, Bosch, more). I liked it a lot. Reserve online beforehand, especially if visiting on a weekend. The area around the museum is also very beautiful, I recommend exploring.

La Reina Sofia: Modern Spanish Art, with a big focus on Dali and Picasso. In the Art Triangle. I’m not a huge fan of either, so the museum wasn’t my favorite, but I still think it’s worth seeing if you have time. The museum also has a cool cafe and an epic library that’s open for students to study in (if you register, for free). Highly recommend if you like quiet spaces.

Museo Thyssen-Bornemisza: A massive private art collection in the art triangle. I never got the chance to visit, but I have friends that say it was their favorite. It has a wide range of art throughout history with a focus on later centuries.

Museo Sorolla: One of my favorites. Sorolla was a very influential impressionist Spanish painter in the 1800s, and this museum is set inside of his house. It takes you through his most important works of art while you tour through his studio, living room, garden, and more. The house and the art were beautiful, and the museum is small. It’s very cheap for students. I recommend going on a nice sunny day so you can enjoy the private gardens to the max.

Matadero: Matadero resides in an abandoned slaughterhouse, and was repurposed into a cultural center. The space is quite industrial, and has a classical architectural style at the same time (really cool). Exhibits are constantly rotating in and out, from live performances to multimedia art pieces. They also have free screenings of movies for students, and an epic cafe. Worth exploring. 

I never visited the following museums myself, but I heard great recommendations for friends — worth checking out.

Archaeology Museum: Apparently, a very impressive collection.

Naval Museum: Self explanatory. My friend swore by this one.

Museo ABC: Drawing/illustration. The architecture of this space is really unique.

Royal Collection of Art: Classical stuff at the royal palace.

Museo La Neomudejar: Another more cultural center kind of vibe. Very modern, very chic, very industrial space. Apparently there’s room to study, too?

Parks

Madrid’s parks are top tier. You’re never far from green space, and “park culture” is also very strong — you’ll always find enjoying the parks with you, especially when it’s nice weather! One of my favorite things about this city.

Parque del Retiro: Absolutely massive and beautiful park next to the center of Madrid, and a must see. It used to be the private garden of a king. You could spend an entire day exploring — green space, running trails, a museum, a lake (with boats you can rent), fountains, monuments, the list goes on. An absolute vibe for any day of the week, especially a Sunday.

Botanical Gardens: Huge, beautiful, and worth checking out. They have a huge variety of plant species here. The greenhouse is my favorite part!

Casa de Campo: Even bigger than retiro. Less infrastructure/people, but more space and miles of trails for biking and running. There’s a pool here too that you can reserve spots for online for those hot days.

Parque de San Isidro: A nice park farther outside the city center. Notably, the Festival de San Isidro happens here on and around May 15th — a huge ‘county fair’ type setup, with rides, games, and free concerts. A huge botellon gathers here as well in the evenings, which is fun for a pregame.

Parque del Oeste: Equally as beautiful as retiro, but much more of a chill vibe, in Moncloa. It doesn’t get as crowded here, and is fantastic to set up for a peaceful picnic.

Parque de la Quinta de los Molinos: The place to see Madrid’s cherry blossoms when they bloom in the spring (February/March).

Parque Madrid Rio: A great development on Madrid’s river in the south, fantastic for walking, running, chilling, etc.

Cafes & Cafe Culture

Cafe culture in Madrid is quite different than it is in the USA. In Spain, there are two types of coffee. The first: regular coffee, which is a not so carefully crafted shot of espresso, with or without milk — kind of the equivalent to a pot of coffee you might get at a diner in the USA. Quick, easy, functional. You can find it at a more traditional spot, or at your university’s cafe. 

Then there’s “Specialty coffee”. Think of a nice cappuccino or cortado with that perfectly steamed milk, the beans freshly roasted, etc. The cafe itself will probably have a cute vibe too that’s nice for studying, meeting friends, etc. 

Because my university was far away from the city center, I did most of my studying in cafes like the one above — but this is a bit trickier than it might seem. Presumably because Spanish culture values social connection very highly, it’s really difficult to find cafes to study in on the weekends. Most will prohibit the use of laptops to preserve a vibe, which I simultaneously really appreciated and found quite inconvenient. Always check the website or call the place you want to go to before setting out — you may show up and find a “no laptops” sign on the table you sit at.

With that said, there’s no shortage of awesome cafes with great coffee and awesome vibes, for studying or hanging out. I visited over 20 and that’s barely scratching the surface. Below I’ve listed some of my favorites.

Rut Cafe: Very small, cute vibe, good wifi. The best thing about it? It’s one of the rare cafes that lets you study/do work every day of the week. Grinded here for my finals, very clutch. Also, I’m pretty sure it’s family owned <3

La Bicicleta: A very popular coworking space in Malsana, which is great if you don’t mind sharing a table with someone. The coffee here is quite good, and you can also get great food (and natural wine!). Study only on weekdays.

HanSo Cafe: Most notable for their brunch options. They make really good food (along with coffee), and have some really interesting japanese style options. Cool vibe inside too, study only on weekdays.

La China Mandarina: Less of a cafe, more of a bar — but a great vibe to work (in the afternoons, not in the evening, to preserve the vibe) if you want to switch things up a bit (trade a coffee for a vermouth? Yes please)

Ambu Coffee (Las Letras): Super tiny shop. Not the best for studying, but a very intimate space with bomb coffee (probably my favorite cortado) for a journaling sesh or a (friend) date?

Faraday: Never tried it, but looks so awesome. It’s a record shop with a cafe inside. Laptop restrictions definitely apply, so don’t try it on a weekend or in the evening (I got turned away :( )

Here’s a google maps list with these and more: Cafe de Madrid 

Communities

“Communities” is a very vague category. I would argue that solely living in Madrid comes with a feeling of community. I really felt a sense of connection and belonging to the city, which I believe stems from the culture of Madrid's vibrant city life (again, thank you walkability). 

Everyone can find their community in Madrid, as long as you actively seek it out. Here are some examples:

Rollerblading/skating: 

Integrating into Madrid’s rollerblading community was one of the highlights of my time there (I wrote a blog about how I got involved). There is a truly massive amount of people who blade/skate in Madrid, and people love getting together to go on routes around the city.

If you already love and practice rollerblading/skating, I promise that you will not regret bringing your skates (pack them in your carryon = no weight restriction). However, even if you’ve never tried it before, there’s a place for you in the community! Community members will regularly host lessons for all skill levels at the explanada (a big flat piece of asphalt covered ground, the rollerblading Mecca for Madrid) and lead routes through Madrid nearly every night of the week of varying speeds, distances, and vibes. 

The larger community also hosts Madrid FNS (Friday night skate), which is a very well organized route through the city with police assistance for road closure and an impressive attendance (try 500+ people!). Everyone I met was really welcoming of me as a newcomer and foreigner, and by the end of the semester I would see someone I knew at every event I went to. Speaking Spanish is a plus, but it’s by no means required — many people speak English (and some are looking for opportunities to practice!).

So, how do you get involved?

Follow @madrid_fns on Instagram — they post information (when, where, how, etc) about the big monthly skate nights. These are a blast, and a great way to meet people.

Follow @madridrollernight on instagram — basically the same event as Madrid FNS, just a different name.

Follow @rollerbirra on Instagram — they post some events and cool rollerblading videos of Spaniards.

Click on the link in @rollerbirra‘s bio (or right here) and join the Telegram group, nearly 2000 members strong. Telegram is a messaging app, similar to Whatsapp. In this group, people post information about lessons, city routes, and other rollering events in the city. Some will ask rollerblading/skating questions as well. Pick a route that corresponds to your skill level and go, no invite needed! From there you can meet people, who might add you to sub-groups, and maybe sub-sub-groups, where there are even more opportunities to meet up.

Follow @roller.secret.society on instagram and join their Whatsapp/Telegram group, links in their bio. Yet another group that posts about meetups, routes, etc., but a little smaller.

There are about a million more accounts and groups that you can find with a little bit of research. Getting involved was really intimidating for me at first, but all it took was getting to one event. From there, I felt welcomed and encouraged to attend many more throughout the semester. I hope you can get involved and have as much fun as I did.

More Communities!

La Bicicritica: I blogged about this too. Madrid’s version of critical mass, on the last Thursday of every month. Basically a party on wheels, more bike focused, a fantastic time.

Salsa, Bachata, Kilombe: There’s a ton of bars where people go to practice latin dance, and there are a ton of events that are free if you know where to look! Many venues hold weekly lessons/free dance events, and many of the same people will show up on a weekly basis. A friend of mine got heavily involved into the community of @mymo_latindance (the people there are really good!). This Whatsapp group posts flyers for events all week, many of which are free.

Couchsurfing Madrid: Madrid has a very vibrant couchsurfing community! If you don’t know couchsurfing, it’s basically a way to meet cool people and get free housing when you’re traveling (I wrote about my experience couchsurfing in Amsterdam). People also host a ton of great events for members of the community, and Madrid has a very strong one! The people there are a bit older, but all super dope and well traveled — I had a lot of fun at the events I went to. They’ll host bar nights, game nights, watch soccer games together, go to fun city events… the list goes on. Worth checking out! Just set your location to Madrid and browse.

Sputnik Climbing: Climbing may be huge in the USA, but it’s pretty big in Spain, too. Sputnik Climbing is a gym that I went to, and they have a bunch of locations throughout the city. Would recommend, great way to meet people.

ESN Madrid: I mentioned this in the UC3M blog I posted previously. Erasmus Student Network is basically an organization that hosts events for international students. There’s probably one for your university, and if there isn’t, you can join events from another Uni (they’re pretty open). Another good way to meet people — and go on some awesome cheap trips around Spain, too!

Social Rugby: I met a british guy at the bicicriti once, and he added me to the whatsapp group for their team. I never ended up going, but if you love rugby (or have ever wanted to try — no experience necessary), here ya go. It’s a very open, international group of people, and they have weekly practices and frequent matches. I would follow and DM them on instagram @madridlionsrfc and ask to join their whatsapp group. Alternatively, show up to their pub and see what’s good.

Alfar de Lavapies (Ceramics): I never got a chance to practice ceramics in Madrid, but this was the closest studio to me. They offer classes, but you can also just work in the studio — send an email and someone will respond to help you get set up (like they did for me).

Nightlife

Madrid’s nightlife is top tier. People are out and about every season, and you can find a party to go to nearly every day of the week. Things start late (club is empty at 12am) and end late (6am is a normal closing time), and there are seemingly endless options for things to do based on your preference. I wrote a blog about Madrid’s nightlife (another blog? go figure) with lots more details on the timing of things, the typical sequence of events, and drinking culture (+ a healthy amount of self reflection :P). 

There are two categories for recommendations I’ll make here: Bars and Clubs. Both of these are on the google maps list: Nightlife in Madrid 

Here are some highlights with more thoughtful descriptions below:

Clubs

The biggest, I repeat, biggest piece of advice I can give to anyone who wants to have a good night out clubbing in Madrid is to follow @mucho.fomo on instagram. This instagram account is goated. Basically, they post about every single electronic music event happening around the city, for every day of the week. All of that information can be found on their website. They’ll also frequently post lists you can sign up for to get into events for free. With this account/website, you’re golden for electronic music.

Another great resource for clubbing that is used around the world is Resident Advisor. Promoters list their events on RA Madrid. Similar to @mucho.fomo. 

Almost all club parties require buying tickets, either at the door or in advance. I’ll assert that all of my recommendations come from my personal preference in music and vibe, so take all of these with a grain of salt. These clubs/promoters are more well known in Madrid. There are countless lesser known events that are incredible and have fantastic music (and will still be listed on @muchofomo)!

Laster Club: The place to be if you like purist type techno. The biggest names in techno get booked here (Rodhad, Rene Wise, Luke Slater, Marron, DVS1, Oscar Mulero, etc). The sound system in Bassement is very good, and the club is pretty intimate. The crowd, while a little commercial, gets hype, I met really cool people there. Buy tickets in advance!

Mondo: Another one of the more famous clubs in Madrid, with a little more of a fun/light vibe and less of a dark/serious vibe when compared to Laster. Big names come here, maybe a little more mainstream than Laster. The club itself has great sound and an awesome open dancefloor.

Fabrik: The most insanely massive club in all of Madrid. At peak, it has 7 stages, all with huge sound systems and elaborate decorations and tons of people. Generally very intense, and can be overwhelming. It is quite far outside of the city center (look into their shuttle service), and going is a commitment. Events they host are less like parties and more like festivals (check out the CODE event for techno), and they get some big names. A good time if you’re in for a proper rave with thousands of people.

Goya Social Club: Great venue if you like house, deeper and groovier. Good DJs are always booked there on the weekends.

Laboratorio Octogon: Never got to go but it looks so sick. Look up @octogon360 on instagram to see what I mean. All kinds of music gets played here.

Also:

Kapital: This spot is really hyped up (7 floors, 3 stages, etc), but if you go there expect a transplantation of American party culture into Madrid — not necessarily a bad thing, but not an intercultural experience. Their disco ball was very pretty though.

Fucking Mondays: Same thing as above; It’s pretty much only tourists that go here. It is on a Monday though and almost always sells out, which is cool. If you want to go, get tickets pretty far in advance, or better yet, join a bar crawl (shoutout our guide Ben from pubcrawl! This was fun).

Bars

For every club in Madrid, there are even more bars. You can get a huge range of vibes depending on where you go. Bars open earlier and end a bit earlier (3 am ish) than clubs. Here are some recs:

La Vía Láctea: Super cool rocker type bar, with a pool table and generally great vibes and interior. Also historical — this was one of the main venues of La Movida. The crowd here is pretty international. Sometimes they have a DJ spinning vinyl old school bangers, and people bust down. Would recommend, get there early on weekends to avoid a line.

El Chapandaz: Being in Moncloa, Chapandaz gives much more of the college bar type of vibe. It gets really fun and rowdy, and the crowd is pretty local (There are also tons of other bars in Moncloa to grab a cheap drink beforehand). The inside looks like a cave (cool). Try their leche de pantera, but be careful — it sneaks up on you FAST (like it did on me). Get there early on weekends to avoid the line.

Jack’s Library: Cocktail speakeasy. There’s literally a secret password to get in (look it up online), it’s super fun. The cocktails are a bit pricier but very bomb af. Sit down chat vibe with amazing interior decor. Get there early on weekends to avoid a line.

Sala Equis: Bar that is located in a previous porno theater. The space itself is really chic and industrial looking — high ceilings, ivy, seating everywhere — great vibes. They also host events here frequently, and have live bands on Sunday during the day!

La Gílderia: Nothing too special about this place, but they specialize in vermouth and have a nice seating area in- and outdoors. Vermouth (Vermut) in Spain is a must try IMO. Spaniards drink it solo on the rocks with a little olive or orange peel and it’s just a great vibe. One of my favs, you can get it everywhere.

Haircuts

Just wanted to shout out Yolanda @yolbecool at Corta Cabeza (Barcelo), she did me so well and was sooo nice. They do edgy cuts well (i got a… mullet). Speaks English but is more comfortable with Spanish. Let her know Niko from USA recommended you if you go to her, and if not, they have tons of other talented stylists.

School/University

I already wrote about my experience going to university in Madrid at UC3M. Read on here!

Travel Within Spain!

Spain is an incredible country with a huge diversity of cities, natural beauty, and culture. A well connected train system makes travel around the country accessible and cheap. Here are some ideas:

Day Trips

Madrid is located smack dab in the middle of the country. Combined with the amazing public transportation, there are tons of day trips you can take!! CEA organizes a bunch of these, I recommend hopping in on the (free!) trips whenever you can, they’re well worth it and the staff is awesome (tell Dana and Miguel I miss them <3). The following descriptions are short blurbs, with my most recommended listed higher up in the list.

Toledo: A must see. Epic cathedral, tight streets, chill vibes.

Segovia: Roman aqueduct, amazing food, cool palace.

Valencia: Vibey town, nice beaches, modern museums, good paella.

Cuenca: Historic moorish city, with hanging houses.

Salamanca: Beautiful college town.

Cercedilla: Great hiking in the mountains outside of Madrid.

Ávila: Medieval vibes, walled city.

El Escorial: Palace, monastery, etc.

Alcalá de Henares: Birthplace of Miguel Cervantes, with a cool university.

Valley of the Fallen: Monument commemorating deaths of those in the Spanish Civil War. Has a huge cross.

Parque de Atracciones: Theme park. Very close to the city, and I heard that it had some pretty good rides.

Weekend Trips:

First, I would highly recommend checking out tour groups for trips within Spain and around Europe/Africa. The two that I know of are City Life Madrid and Smart Insiders, which I also listed in the Settling In section. I did a trip to Northern Morocco with Smart Insiders, and it was great — cheap price, well organized, awesome itinerary, and a fun/young group of people. Super nice to forget about the planning and just follow along for a change.

Of course, planning trips yourself is awesome too, and Spain has an incredible array of destinations. I could have spent every weekend traveling somewhere new, and regret not seeing more of the country. Big cities in Europe will always be easy to get to, smaller Spanish destinations not so much — take advantage! Here are some more noteworthy cities in Spain that deserve a weekend trip, again with my highest recommendations up first in the list:

Barcelona: Self explanatory, a must see (I compared Barcelona to Madrid in this post)

Costa Brava: A nice extension to a Barcelona trip. Mediterranean coast, small towns.

Sevilla: There’s so much to see here! The capital of Andalucia. CEA does a trip here as well, don’t miss it.

Granada: La Alhambra alone makes Granada worth visiting. Lots of Moorish influence.

Córdoba: Close to Granada, can see both in one trip if you plan it right.

Málaga: Big beach city on the southern coast.

Basque Country (San Sebastian/Bilbao): Basque country and language (Euskera) is very distinct from the rest of Spain. Super interesting, beautiful cities (and coastline), and incredible food. 

Mallorca: Island beach vibes. Palma is the biggest city, and parties a bit more — it would be worth checking this out and then one of the smaller towns for a more peaceful vibe.

Canary Islands/Tenerife: Ditto on the above. More tropical, and a bit calmer. People that went to Tenerife said they were joined by a lot of old British tourists.

Ibiza: Island beach vibes, but party to the max.

Picos de Europa National Park: Incredible national park in Spain. The mountain landscape was amazing and unique, and the small towns that surround it are charming. If you love nature, I wouldn’t miss this park.

Galicia: Galicia is a region, not a city. Regrettably, I never got the chance to go, but a trip to Galicia provides a chance to experience another unique Spanish subculture (and language — they speak Gallego). I hear that the coast is incredibly beautiful. The Camino de Santiago stops here, too, in Santiago de Compostela.

Lists

I made a lot of google maps lists during my travels, which is a hobby/impulse of mine, for better or for worse.  An important note about those — they contain all the places I’ve been, not just ones that I like. Make sure you check out my notes, because not every single one has a good review 🙂. Here’s all of them in one place, some of which were included in sections above, some of which were included in previous blogposts:

Madrid

Nightlife Madriz

Café de Madriz

Spots Guayes de Madriz 

Places to Try (things I didn't get to in Madrid) 

Spain

Restaurantes de España (mostly Madrid)

Sevilla 

Granada 

Barcelona (+ Costa Brava) 

Northern Spain (Picos de Europa, San Sebastian, Bilbao) 

Europe

Italy (Milan, Rome, Florence, Bologna, & more) 

Amsterdam

Berlin  

London 

______________________________________________________________

So, here ends my incredibly long and (hopefully) comprehensive guide to Madrid. If you get even one thing out of it, I’ll consider that an incredible W. I loved my time in Madrid, and the idea of helping others get the most out of their experience there too brings me a lot of joy. Let me know if one of my recommendations led you to an awesome experience, I would love to hear it :)

Don’t hesitate to reach out with questions, comments, or recommendations for how I could make this guide better — I’m always open and willing to talk! Have an amazing rest of your day, wherever you are in the world!

Ciaooooo,

Niko Economos

Aerospace Engineering

Universidad Carlos III de Madrid

Madrid, Spain

economos@umich.edu 

P.S.: This post is on substack too, which is a bit easier to share because you don't need an account to read on mobile. Read here.

[youthofnausea7]

The resorts will be closing in about a week or two, and while I'll most likely have another session in that time and for sure will be going to Mammoth in June, I figure now is as good of a time as any for an eos report.

Tricks I've locked in:

Frontside shifty with nose grab to tail grab

Frontside 50-50 (most rails and pipes at Bear Mtn)

Frontside noseblunt/lipside (most pipes at Bear Mtn, two of the rails at Snow Summit)

Flatground fakie cab 360s

Switch frontside 360s

Pole jams (Scary for me, so a big deal. Nothing fancy off of them for the reason mentioned, just as much of a steezy shifty as I can get fs or bs)

Tricks I've attempted/stomped but still look really ugly:

Tamedog (Fast cartwheel style frontflip)

Bs Miller flip (I'm basically doing a fast knuckle/hip tripod [nose of the board and hands on the snow with the tail sticking up] using the momentum to swing a full 360 or 270 depending on the feature back to regular with enough speed and air that the board becomes airborne basically resulting in a flip while dragging my fingertips. My hope is that I can do it with enough send that it becomes more like a corked bs 360. My eventual goal is to get it to a point that neither my board nor my hands touch the snow resulting in a proper corked 360 off the knuckle)

270 into boardslide (Most beginner boxes and rails at all resorts)

Tricks I want to land next season:

Fronstide 540 (Was planning on landing one of these this season and it didn't happen, was actually expecting it to happen switch)

Tamedog (Off of jumps, when I tried it was off of a bank and was basically like a somersault)

Backside shifty nose grab to tail grab

Frontside boardslide

Bs boardslide pretzel out (270 in the opposite direction)

Better and more frequent grabs with my 360 spins

Corked bs 360 (as mentioned in reference to Miller flips)

Fs (proper) Miller flips, preferably over a barrel or other park feature

Backflip maybe? They're supposedly really easy, just kind of scary

Top speed this season: 42 mph

Steepest run: Cornice at Mammoth (was hoping to hit Climax which is steeper but it looked crappy)

Setup: Board: 2015 Arbor Zygote/Flux GT bindings year unknown, 2023 Rome Agent/Union Flite Pro bindings 2015. Boots: Thirtytwo TM3 Bear Mtn Edition unknown year. Pants: 686xMatix Street Pant unknown year. Jacket: 686 Smarty 3 in 1 2024/Pullover sweater and/or my trusty red flannel. Gloves: Crab Grab Cinch Trigger Mitt (Rip, lost them and was about to buy another pair but the brand majorly cheaped out on materials with no difference on price so I got the Punch Mitt because it was the only one they still made with the same materials. Felt bad still buying from a brand that sold out so brutally but it was still the best quality gear I could get that was vegan). Goggles: Electric EG3 2022/Electric Mahi sunglasses. Helmet: Smith Maze

Fucking excellent season, not as much snow as last season but I'm okay with that. I don't need to be spending hours shoveling when I'm already losing sleep working back to back shifts 16 hours a day. The powder days weren't nearly as epic as they were but I still got to hit it and had still got to have perfect days just having fun vibing around.

It's not all about doing the sickest shit! I enjoy snowboarding because it's my favorite thing to do, I've been doing it my whole life never missing a single winter and am not nearly as good at it as one would expect. It's basically just my happy place, most days I'll just cruise around and hit a couple jumps and rails while spending plenty of time at the bar, so don't be scared of being judged or looking stupid if you're trying it for the first time. We're all here to have fun and most of us are totally patient and accepting if you need any sort of guidance, just ask.

All of the love and shred on!

[sweeterthanthis]

Your Filthy Heart

Part Three: The Pure and The Poison

Your Filthy Heart Masterlist

Thank you to @ozarkthedog for reading this through for me and to @msmarvelwrites for the support and some epic dirty talk suggestions!

Summary: It’s time to give Daddy a taste of his own medicine by bringing your boyfriend, Peter Parker, home for dinner.

Pairing: Stepdad!Bucky Barnes x Female Reader, Peter Parker x Female Reader

Warnings: Explicit sexual content, explicit language, daddy/stepdad kink, infidelity, vaginal sex, dirty talk, derogatory language, a touch of face slapping, cum play(?). 18+.

 Word Count: 3.5k

“I’m nervous, like really nervous. Is my tie straight?” 

There was a part of you that felt guilty for dragging Peter into your shit, truly. But you’d be lying if you said you weren’t enjoying his affections. 

He was handsome, a strong jawline, kind eyes, a boy next door kinda attitude. Peter was everything that Bucky wasn’t, and maybe a little part of you made the conscious decision to start dating him because he was so different.

You knew you were pushing your luck, but when the thought occurred to invite him home for dinner, your mouth engaged before your brain and you’d already asked. 

“It’s just dinner, Pete. You didn’t need to wear a tie at all.” You couldn’t help but smile at him as he fixed his hair in the rear mirror, but the pit of dread in your stomach was only growing more by the second. “Come on, Mom’s probably bouncing up and down in anticipation.”

“Your Stepdad’s gonna be home soon right? Fuck, I wanna make a good impression.” 

Placing a hand on his thigh, muscular and firm, you gave it a reassuring squeeze. He really was adorable, an underlying sexiness about him because he was so concerned with being the most decent guy he could be. And he didn’t deserve a single second of the torture you were about to put him through. 

Was that going to stop you? Absolutely not. 

You knew your mother would be too high on the buzz that you’d finally met a guy you’d deemed important enough to bring home for dinner. She wouldn’t notice the impending tension, of that you were sure. 

Stepping out of Peter’s car, your tummy flipping at the thought of Bucky coming home to find his spot in the garage taken, you readjusted your skirt and motioned at Peter to get out of the car with a roll of your eyes and a nod of your head. 

“Sorry, I don’t know what’s wrong with me.” He muttered, reaching for the bouquet of flowers he’d bought for your Mom in the back seat. 

Grabbing his hand, you tugged him towards the door connecting the house to your garage, you made your way to the kitchen -- the scent of pot roast, of course, filling the air and the sounds of gentle piano music playing softly in the background. 

Your Mom really had gone the whole hog to make a good impression, and you couldn’t blame her. She had no idea you were screwing her husband, feelings of possessiveness and bitterness growing with each passing day. 

She loved Peter. That much was very clear from the second she’d been introduced to him.  

You feigned interest as she sat across from him on the plush, cream sofa; asking him a thousand questions and not allowing him the airtime to answer a single one before she’d thought of another. 

But all you could think of was him. The look on his face when he saw Peter sitting next to you on the couch, the hand that was currently resting loosely on your knee, your Mother’s beaming smile as she informed him that we had a dinner guest. 

You revelled in the power you held — the power to drive him insane with jealousy. 

You zoned out as you helped your Mother set the table, the sound of her voice muffled in your ears when you heard the low rumble of a car engine pull up on the driveway; blood instantly pounding in your ears. 

“Oh, that’ll be James.” Your mother gushed, clasping her hands together and straightening out the cutlery on the way back to the kitchen. 

James. 

She always did like to abandon the nickname when she was trying to impress. You’d heard the name ring out in the night air on more than one occasion that week. And the thought made you sick. 

You held no claim over him. Not really. But that didn’t stop the rage from bubbling in your belly each and every time. 

“Hey, you okay? You look as nervous as I feel.” 

Peters hand resting on your lower back, his soft eyes looking down on you with gentle concern, you forced yourself to smile and nodded. 

“Yeah, yeah I’m fine. He can just be a little,” you paused, wringing your fingers together in front of you, “intense.” 

He wrapped his arm around your waist, tugging you into his side to give your body a reassuring squeeze — guilt thumping through your veins as you cursed yourself for dragging him into the mess you’d found yourself in. 

“Anyone wanna tell me who’s car is in my spot?” 

The sound of his voice, laced with irritation and curiosity, had your heart beating rapidly in your chest; the reality of what you’d done setting in as his footsteps drew nearer. 

“Hey, it’ll be fine. I’ll make a good impression, I promise.” 

Peter was too good for you, of that much you were certain. But you forced a smile anyway, leaning up on your tiptoes to meet his waiting kiss. 

At the worst possible moment. 

“What do we have here?” 

Exhaling a shaky breath, you composed yourself, opening your eyes to meet his fiery stare. There he stood in the living room doorway, rolling up the sleeves of his crisp, black button up. You couldn’t help but let your eyes wander to the way the veins in his hands flexed. 

Before you could speak, Peter stepped forward; holding his own hand out for Bucky to shake. 

“Mr Barnes, Sir, I’m Peter Parker. It’s nice to finally meet you.” 

All you could do was watch as Peter’s hand hung in the air, Bucky with his hands on his hips, leaning back on his heels slightly. The tension was evident, yet only you and he knew why — the weight of your entanglement heavy in the air. 

“Finally, huh?” 

Bucky caught your anxiety-ridden stare over Peter’s shoulder, chewing on the inside of his cheek; brow furrowed as he blew out a heavy breath through his nostrils. 

“Nice to meet you, Peter. I didn’t realise we’d be having a guest for dinner.” Bucky stepped forward then, forcing a smile and shaking Peter’s hand firmly with one hand, and planting the other firmly on his shoulder. “Would’ve come home earlier, but then nobody tells me anything in this house.” 

The intent to agitate Bucky was clearly paying off, but you never anticipated the way it would make you feel — stomach churning and headache inducing. 

With Peter in the room and your Mother hovering in the next room, you knew you were safe. Yet the thought of what he might do later that night after your Mother had passed out from necking too much Chardonnay had your tummy fluttering. 

“C’mon, Pete.” Bucky threw a smirk in your direction, throwing an arm around Peter’s shoulder and guiding him towards the kitchen. “Let’s go get a beer and leave the ladies to it, huh?”

Your mouth hung open in astonishment and your feet planted to the floor, all you could do was watch as your lover took your boyfriend aside for what you could only assume would be a desperately uncomfortable conversation. 

As you helped your Mother to prepare dinner, absentmindedly chopping tomatoes for the salad, you kept one eye on Bucky who was already sitting at the dining table across from a flustered Peter — and mentally kicked yourself for putting yourself in such a stressful situation. 

You tried not to look at him as you walked over to the table, salad bowl heavy in your trembling hands.

Walking around the back of his chair, you did your best to flash Peter a reassuring smile, his eyes flitting from yours to Bucky’s while he tried to keep his attention on the conversation. 

As you leant over to put the salad bowl on the table, a discreet, firm squeeze to your ass made you jump; his fingers digging into your flesh in not so subtle warning. 

“Oh!”

“Are you okay?” Peter asked, shooting a concerned look in your direction. 

Breathing a short sigh of relief when his hand withdrew, you straightened yourself out and walked around to your Boyfriends seat; blood hot with frustration at the way Bucky had put his hands on you in such a fragile situation. 

Suddenly, you simply didn’t give a fuck. 

How dare he try to lay a claim on you after everything you’d had to deal with; having to watch every day while he played at happy marriages with your mother. 

“I’m fine, Babe.” You leant down then, planting a gentle kiss on his cheek and shooting Bucky a warning stare. “I’m gonna go wash up for dinner, okay? Be right back.” 

Your anxiety was slowly morphing into vitriol, your hips swaying as you marched past your Stepfather’s unamused gaze. 

Fuck him. 

You washed your hands in the bathroom, gearing yourself up for what was sure to be a very awkward dinner — checking your makeup in the mirror, and fixing your hair. 

He’d riled you up, and now you had a point to prove. And you had every intention of doing so, one way or another. 

Making your way out of the bathroom, you straightened out your pleated skirt - the one you knew drove Bucky crazy - walking down the hallway with a confidence that you’d seemingly plucked out of nowhere. 

“What the-” 

One strong arm wrapped around your midsection, pulling your back tight against a broad chest -- and you needed no clue as to whom it belonged to. 

He yanked you through the door to the garage, shoving you forwards a little as the door clicked shut and the lock twisted. 

Everything inside you told you to give him a piece of your mind, spinning on your heel, your cheeks hot with disbelief. 

But as he stepped towards you, his eyes trained on your shaking form, you felt warmth flood your groin and you were putty once again. You hated how easily he reduced you to a desperate mess of a girl. Truly, you did. 

The fact remained, your Boyfriend was the other side of the wall and your Mother was floating around the house fussing like a woman possessed. 

“How dare—”

Bucky’s hand gripped your throat in warning, wedding ring digging against the supple flesh of your neck - the fire in his beautiful eyes causing your pussy to clench around nothing.

Shoved up against the passenger side of Peter’s car, you lifted your chin in defiance, a slight smirk gracing your glossy lips as you soaked in his fury. 

“You tryna piss Daddy off, Princess? ‘Cause you’re doin’ a real good job.” 

Your fingers dragged up your bare thighs, lifting your skirt up higher, his thigh pressed firmly against your lace covered cunt. 

“What’sa matter, Daddy? You jealous?” The low growl that emitted from his throat made you shudder, his breath warming your face as he tilted your chin up roughly with his fingers. “You not enjoying getting a taste of your own medicine, Daddy? Is that it?”

“You fuck that kid? Huh?” The hand around your throat squeezed, thumb pushing against your pulse point, his lips inches from yours. “You better answer me or I swear to fuckin’ God, girl...”

One hand palming at the throbbing erection in his trousers, the other gripping his own as it shook against your throat, you smiled. And he looked like he wanted to fucking murder you. 

“So what if I did? Seems fair to me. At least you don’t have to listen to me screaming his name. And Daddy, he makes me scream.” 

You ignored the fear bubbling in your chest, your bratty mouth unable to stop itself from running merry hell. 

“He’s so big, Daddy. Stretches me out so good.” Bucky pulled you towards him then, teeth clenched and jaw ticking, on the edge of losing every bit of control. And you just couldn’t help yourself. “You should see it.”

The dark chuckle that fell from his lips held no humor, his tongue pressed against the inside of his cheek and his head cocked to the side. 

“Is that what this is, Princess? Fuck, that jealousy’s just eatin’ you up, huh? Poor baby…” 

Your confidence waned for a moment, whimpering pathetically as his thumb traced your trembling jaw. You couldn’t stop yourself, hips winding down against his thick thigh, a twinkle in his eye as he watched you with a faux pout etched on his lips. 

“If you weren’t so fuckin’ cute, it’d be pathetic. Lookit you; grindin’ down on Daddy’s leg like a bitch in heat. What would Peter say, hmm?”  

Shame swam deep in your gut, but it was nothing compared to the warmth spreading between your legs, the damp patch on your panties staining the material of his suit pants.

“Daddy—” 

His fingers nestled between your lips, pressing down on your tongue as they slid down your throat - gag reflex kicking in when the tips of his fingers found your tonsils. 

“Suck.” 

You did as he asked, eyes boring into his as he thrust his fingers back and forth between your lips, garbled moans vibrating in your throat, spit coating the platinum band on his ring finger. 

“Why do I always gotta remind you who you belong to, huh?” You couldn’t answer, mouth stuffed full, tears pooling in your eyes, and spittle dripping from the corners of your mouth. “You think I was just gonna make nice with your little boyfriend in there? Bet he doesn’t know what a dirty little cockslut you really are does he?” 

A sharp tap to your cheek, spit slick against your skin, had you quivering. Yet your hands found the collar of his shirt, gripping it tightly and yanking him down towards you. Your lips crashed against his then, a satisfied grunt vibrating against your mouth, one hand gripping your ass while the other dove between your legs. 

Bucky held you tight against his chest, fingers dipping beneath the gusset of your panties and swiping through your sloppy folds as he walked you clumsily round to the hood of Peter’s car - lifting you effortlessly and setting you down, cool metal causing you to shudder from the chill. 

You watched as he yanked your panties down your legs, your heart pounding at the thought of your Mother and your Boyfriend next door, waiting for you to return.

“I can’t trust you to be a good girl, can I? Can’t trust you to keep those fuckin’ legs shut.” 

“Daddy, I-” 

“You’re gonna shut your fuckin’ mouth and take it, you got that Princess?” 

Before you could open your mouth to answer, he’d balled your damp panties in his fist and forced them between your lips — teeth clenching down onto the salty-sweet lace. 

It was humiliating, degrading; but when was it not? You craved it, the way he treated you. That feeling of being owned, completely surrendering yourself to another person. He made you need that.  

“Look at that, always so wet for Daddy.” 

His palms splayed out against the flesh of your thighs, he pushed them apart, spreading you open and putting you on display just for him. 

Your heart was racing, the thrill of being caught at any moment thumping adrenaline through your veins. He could sense it, lips twitching into a satisfied smirk as he watched your eyes flit frantically back and forth between him and the door. 

“D’you have any idea how much I wanna drag you back in there and fuck you on that table. Make them both watch, show them that you’re mine?”

Your moans muffled by the material stuffed between your teeth, two thick fingers stretching out your cunt as he unbuckled his pants — you shook your head. 

You knew you had an effect on him, you knew he couldn’t stop himself from touching you, from creeping into your room late at night. But the way he looked at you now, the burning intensity in his eyes; it shook you to your core. 

“If I had the time Princess, I’d eat that slutty little pussy right here. Make you gush all over Petey Boy’s car. He make you come as hard as Daddy does?” 

Frantically, you shook your head from side to side. Peter had never even so much as grabbed your ass, but you’d riled Bucky up to the point of insanity. A man on a mission to prove just who you belonged to. 

“No? You've sure changed your tune.” 

You watched as he pumped his thick cock in his palm, the tip of him nudging against your clit, your pussy twitching. 

“Daddy’s gonna fuck the attitude right outta you, so stay quiet and keep those legs open for me.” 

Your arms hooked beneath your knees, thighs spread wide, you barely had time to brace yourself before his cock split you open inch by inch. 

You’d expected him to rut into you with excruciating force, to take you roughly. So when he thrust into you with slow, patient strokes; you could do nothing to hide the curiosity on your face. 

“I know you know who fucks you the best. You just love riling Daddy up, don’t you? Get so - fuck - goddamn jealous of Mommy.” 

Your head lulled back as his dick dragged against the throbbing walls of your cunt, his thumb finding your clit while he caressed your breasts with his free hand. 

It was too much, too much tenderness, too good. 

You hated yourself for wanting it. The new sensation of his knuckles softly grazing the hollow of your throat as he undulated his hips against your pelvis, hitting spots inside of you you didn’t even know existed. 

“You know what you do to me, Baby? Look at me.” 

Baby. 

Bucky leant forward then, elbows either side of your head on the hood, balls deep inside you as he ground his hips into yours at a torturously slow pace. 

“I got you all spread open wide for me, and my fuckin’ wife is right next door. She could walk in here right now and fuck, I still wouldn’t stop. You know how fucked up that is?” 

It was nonsense, the broken words falling from your panty stuffed mouth, heat rising in your belly when he pulled out completely and slid on home once again. 

He fit you perfectly; there was no doubt about it. The way your cunt wrapped around his dick, it was fucking sinful how perfect it felt. Sparks of pleasure shooting through your core as he rubbed tiny, delicate circles over your swollen clit. 

“Tell me how much you want me.” Bucky ripped the panties from your mouth, shoving them in his pocket as you licked your dried out lips. “Need’ta hear you say it. Come on, Princess.” 

You’d never seen it before, the needy side of him, the way he practically whimpered when your pussy clenched around his girth, his hand gently squeezing your thigh while the other tentatively worked your sensitive nub. 

You tried to speak, tried to find the words he so desperately needed to hear — mouth hanging open in sheer confusion. 

“You’re not coming until you tell me, and we’ve been gone a while…” 

He halted inside you, only the tip of him nestled between your pussy lips, thumb hovering over your clit and a soft, yet entirely serious look gracing his gorgeous face. 

“I—I want you, Daddy.” You yielded, your voice barely above a whisper. 

Your hand flew to your mouth, muffling the yelp as he slammed back into you in one brutal motion — slowly withdrawing and circling your clit with the tip of his dick. 

“Again.”

“I want you, Daddy.” Insistent this time, no tremble in your voice, hips winding down towards his length, eager to have him back where he belonged. “Only want you, Daddy.” 

There was no hint of a lie in your tone, and as he fucked you - possessive and hungry - you wondered how any other man could ever match him. 

Sprawled out on the hood of Peter’s car, legs hooked over Bucky’s shoulders, you begged and panted; nearing closer and closer to sweet release. 

“You do, don’t you? You belong to me, Princess. Daddy’s all the man - shit - you need.” 

Garbled words choked in your throat, the breath punched from your lungs when he pinched your clit roughly with his fingertips, stars dancing behind your eyelids as pleasure twisted in your abdomen, limbs shaking and numb. 

Pathetic whispers of daddy, daddy, daddy had him slamming into you, unforgiving and merciless while he chased his own orgasm. 

“Fuck lookit you, fallin’ apart on poor Parker’s car, cunt full’a Daddy. Wanna fill you up so bad Princess, but I’ve got a better idea.”

You felt the hollow emptiness of his withdrawal, hazy eyes flickering open to catch sight of him; teeth bared, fist furiously pumping his cock, white, hot spurts of come smattering against the already sopping flesh of your swollen, fucked-out pussy lips. 

“Bucky! Darling, where are you?”

You panicked, hopping down off the hood and scrambling to push your skirt back down your aching thighs. 

“Fuck, gimme my underwear.” You hissed, holding out your hand as you bounced on your heels. 

“Nuh uh, Princess. You’re gonna sit there all night next to Peter, who seems like a real nice kid by the way, with my come all over you. Be real hard to forget who’s little cockwhore you are then, won’t it?”

You watched, dumb struck as he casually tucked himself back into his pants, swiping the wine bottle from the counter and making his way to the door. 

“Hurry now, we’ve kept our guest waiting long enough don’t you think?” 

With a wink and a sardonic smirk, Bucky disappeared through the door, your Mom’s soft laughter ringing in your ears through the wood. 

Dinner was surprisingly a lot less awkward than you expected, aside from the jabs from Bucky thrown in your direction every now and again. But you’d much rather he targeted you than Peter. 

Sitting with Bucky’s come smothered between your thighs made the guilt in your gut throb every time Peter’s soft fingers found the bare flesh of your knee beneath the table. 

No matter how much water you chugged, your mouth was dry throughout, your instincts driving you to get through the meal without choking and needing to excuse yourself.

As the evening drew to a close, your Mother tipsy and insisting that Peter come back to visit again the following week, you couldn’t wait to get him out of there and wipe away the mess from between your legs. 

“Parker, you ever play golf?” Bucky asked as Peter pulled on his jacket. 

You couldn’t believe the audacity of him, shame and fury eating at you as he played the perfect, welcoming parent.

“Uh, a little from time to time.” He answered, looking down at you with a proud smile as he sensed an invitation coming. It killed you, the sweetness on his features. You didn’t deserve an ounce of it. 

“I’ll get your address from our girl, huh? Pick you up Saturday, say, just after lunch?” 

Our girl. 

It made you cringe, chewing on your bottom lip as you took hold of Peter’s hand and led him to the garage where you’d been full of your Stepdad’s cock just an hour earlier. 

“Yes, that’d be great Mr Barnes. Thank you!” 

“Please, call me Bucky.” 

You couldn’t stand it any longer, making your way to the garage while Peter trailed behind you saying his goodbye’s.

He kissed you softly, and it made you want to weep—the way his hands cupped your cheeks, his thumbs stroking against the corners of your mouth. When he pulled away, the look of adoration on his face had your heart skipping a beat. 

This was what you needed.

This relationship was healthy. Safe. Right. 

So why did it feel so wrong? 

What you had with Bucky could never go anywhere, would never progress to more than secretive fucks and risky situations. 

“Your Stepdad seems like a decent guy, but he’s really hard on you huh?” 

“You have no idea.” 

[niko-jpeg]

Multiverse HC Chain.

-Geno would fist fight the sun if he got drunk enough.

-Dream is genderfluid and wears skirts unironically sometimes

-Ink climbs trees sometimes, but gets stuck because he doesn't want to jump down.

-Dust does competitive table flipping with the rest of Nightmares crew.

-Blue sprays Ink with water if he draws "questionable" art and tries to show people. Or does anything stupid and reckless at all outside of battle.

-Dream is clingy.

-Error is a kleptomaniac.

-Ink is secretly obsessed with liminal spaces.

-Cross nicknamed Epic "the Walking Grape".

-Epic nicknamed Cross "the Living Embodiment of Angst".

-Error refers to Fresh, Epic, and Cross and Tweedle dumb, Tweedle Dumber, and Tweedle Dumbest.

-So does the rest of the multiverse actually.

-Nightmare curls up in a ball and sleeps in weird places like a cat.

-You can bribe reaper not to take your soul with enough coffee. Don't quite know how you're gonna get that much but if you do more power to ya.

-Nightmare can swap between passive and not, but still be goopy af.

-Killer will chase a laser pointer.

-Dream likes singing, but is too shy to do it in front of anyone.

-Dream and Nightmare used to playfight like what cats do before the apple incident.

-Paperjam and Gradient got lost in an Ikea once when they were little.

-Dadmare

-Paperjam is older than Gradient by two and a half years.

-Epic and Cross once defenestrated someone.

-Cross doesn't like Fresh very much.

-Dream secretly writes fanfiction.

-When Ink found the folder full of fanfiction that Dream has saved on his computer, he pulled three all nighters to read it all in secret.

-Occasionally, Epic, Dream, and Cross cuddle. Just because.

-Horror likes sunsets.

-Killer is really just a four year old with knives and swear words.

-Killer is also a Persona fan.

-Classic Gaster was a great boss. Relatively chill, supportive, and one time threw a bag of Popato Chisps at the King because all is fair in war and truth or dare.

-Error has so much blackmail on the entire Multiverse its almost creepy.

-Ink has ADHD

-Blue is unnaturally strong and once nearly broke Inks arm

-There are a lot more outcodes than the ones that are most commonly known. A lot of them stick to their own stuff and keep to themselves.

That's all for now. I'll add more soon! I have a lot of fun with writing HCs that contribute literally nothing to any plotline but are just funny side notes. If you want to continue this with your own headcannons, feel free! I'd love to hear what everyone else's takes on the characters around the multiverse are!

[beels-burger-babe]

All is Fair in Dice and War

***Soooo, @bagelsinatoaster I love this request. However, you didn't specify which board game and as I am a huge nerd I decided to take some creative liberties and combine this with another idea I've been meaning to write which is: MC introducing the demon bros to Dungeons and Dragons. I certainly had fun with this and I hope you like it!*** Summary: Leviathan's world is flipped upside down when MC tells him there is a game that basically allows him to be the Lord of Shadows in real life!! He demands that his brothers join him as MC introduces them all to the chaotic shit show that is Dungeons & Dragons. For once, it was a peaceful day in the House of Lamentation. Lucifer was lounging in the living room with a cursed record playing softly in the background. For once, Satan had willingly joined him and was sitting by the fireplace, thumbing through a book on the human world. Belphie had been passed out on the couch when he arrived and was still laying there with an impressive puddle of drool collecting near his mouth. Even Asmodeus and Beel had joined in, with Asmodeus gently humming to himself as he painted his nails and Beelzebub happily munching on a snack as he enjoyed the sight of his family getting along. Yes. It was perfectly quiet and peaceful, and Lucifer didn't even have any traces of his regular migraine. But of course, nothing good lasts forever. Everyone jumped as the door slammed open and a wide-eyed Leviathan dragged you into the room. The two you very closely followed by Mammon loudly complaining. "Oi! You're gonna hurt them! Cut it out, Levi!" Lucifer sighed and closed his eyes, momentarily mourning the peace that he had just barely begun to enjoy, and closed his book. "Leviathan, let MC go. What are you freaking out about this time?" Lucifer regretted asking the moment the words left his mouth. Levi looked at it with the expression he only ever got when his limited edition Ruri-Chan merch arrived; his eyes were wide and glittering with excitement while his face bore a grin so large that Lucifer was surprised it didn't rip his skin. The third-born was practically vibrating as he let go of your wrist and pushed you forward. "Tell them! Tell them about the game!"

You laughed at Levi's excitement and casually rubbed your wrist. "I was just telling Leviathan about a game that we play in the human world called Dungeons and Dragons-" "You get to make a fantasy world that everyone plays in, and everyone makes characters. You can be a wizard and cast spells against a huge monster! Or a war hero fighter that has been betrayed by his brother! Or a noble knight who is looking for his lost kingdom! And the best part is that it's real!" Levi interrupted, nearly jumping in place as stars danced in his eyes. You put your hands out towards him to try and calm him a bit. "Well, not entirely real. It is played in person, but it's a role play tabletop game, meaning it mostly relies on the players' imagination. That is unless you have thousands of dollars to spend on 3D maps and figurines of your characters." Levi's eyes grew even wider, if possible, as he started shaking his hands up and down. "I CAN HAVE A FIGURINE OF A CHARACTER THAT I MADE?! GAAAAAAAAAHH!" A pillow flew across the room and hit Levi square in the face as a now awake Belphegor glared at him. "Will. You. Shut. Up?" the Avatar of Sloth hissed as a dark dangerous aura grew around him. Beel gently patted his twin's head in hopes of calming him. Leviathan pouted as he noticed no one else seemed to be getting excited about it. "C-Come on guys! This isn't even a video game! It's a thing that we can all do together and personalize it to be something that everyone will like. It'll be fun! Right MC?" You nodded as you gently tossed Belphie's pillow back over to him. "Yeah. I love D&D. I played it all the time in the human world. There's action, suspense, and even romance if you really wanted it," a couple of the brothers perked up at that. "I could put together a one-shot for you guys to try it out if you'd like? I'll help you make your characters, and we can all get together for an evening and play it sometime in a couple weeks." The room went quiet as everyone thought it over. Most of them had no interest in the game itself, but if it was organized by you... "I'm in," Beel decided with a nod. "I think it will be fun. All of us trying something new; it could be neat." Satan casually flipped a page in his book, "The creative aspect of it is definitely appealing. We'd be the masters of our own fate, and that most certainly piques my interest." Asmodeus smirked as he put the cap on his nail polish. "And you said it could be whatever we want? My, one might say that this game could help our wildest fantasies come true~" he made sure to wink at you as he giggled. Belphie, who had only just got back his pillow, scrunched up his face in disgust and launched it at Asmo. "Don't make this weird Asmo," he looked over at you and shrugged, "So long as you do all the work in putting together the character thing, sure. Why not?" Mammon looked over at you from the corner of his eye. "Ya mean to tell me, that you can make it so I'm some awesome, rich, and powerful prince?" Asmo scoffed as he pushed the pillow off his lap. "Please Mammon, even the world of make-believe has its limitations." Mammon blushed as he growled at his brother. You just chuckled and teasingly elbowed his side. "Don't listen to him, Mammon. There is a set amount of how much money you start out with depending on your class and background, but I'm sure we can find something that will make you happy." The second-born blushed even more as he grumbled quietly under his breath. Lucifer tilted his head in thought. "I suppose that if everyone else is playing, naturally I must as well," he stood and began to make his way to his office. "I look forward to seeing what you come up with MC." The next two weeks were spent planning and carefully figuring out the details of the one-shot and the characters that everyone was going to play. Levi was, of course, the first one who came to you to build his character. The two of you spent hours going through the Player's Handbook and sourcebooks to find the perfect build to recreate the Lord of Shadows. In the end, you put

together a human fighter that you gave a couple magic items to make Levi's vision really come to life. It seemed basic, but for the Lord of Shadows, it was perfect. The moment the two of you finished, Levi dove to his computer and ordered a custom-made mini that looked exactly like his character. Satan was genuinely interested in the game, especially after he learned about all the lore and rules behind the different classes and races. You had just been chilling in your room one day when the door burst open. Satan stood there with wide eyes holding a copy of Volo's Guide to Monsters. "MC, why didn't you tell me there are cat people?!" You chuckled, knowing exactly where this was going. "They're called tabaxi, but yeah, they're basically cat people. Would you like to play as one?" He scoffed and snapped the book shut. "Is that even a question? Of course, I'm playing as one." After some discussion and bouncing back and forth between classes a couple of times, Satan settled on a tabaxi druid; that way he not only looked like a cat, but he could speak to them as well. After a few days of you spending time with his brothers focusing on getting their characters ready, Mammon came to you wanting the coolest, most epic character ever. At first, it was clear that he wasn't fully invested in the process, but as he saw the customizable options and all the cool stuff that his character could have, you got his attention. You ended up designing a golden teifling rogue (you tried to tell Mammon that teifling usually wasn't yellow, but he gave you such a sad look that you couldn't say no) that was decked out with piercings and gems all over its horns and tail. He tried to act like he wasn't that excited about it, but one day during class you caught him doodling what looked like a stick figure version of the character on his sheet with a big smile on his face. Asmodeus came in shortly after Mammon finished,

insisting on having the most charming and beautiful character there was. You tapped your chin at the request. "I mean, stereotypically bards are extremely charming and...well seductive...almost too seductive. But that's only thei-" Asmo had hearts in his eyes before you could even finish. "That's what I want to be!" You sighed and made a mental note not to include any dragons in the session as you marked Asmo down to be an elven bard and helped him create his character sheet. You hadn't heard anything from Lucifer for nearly that entire first week, until one day as you were lounging in the living room, he walked in holding a stack of resource books. "Ah, MC. I've been looking for you. I wanted to inform you that I will be playing a half-elf multiclassing as a paladin and hex-blade warlock." You blinked at him as he put all the books down in front of you. "O-Oh. Would you like help putting together your character sheet?" He just grinned and began to make his way out of the room once more. "I've already done it. I must admit that this was quite a bit more interesting than I thought it would be," and with that he was gone, leaving you to try and figure out what had just happened. With only a few days left until the one-shot, you had to go find the twins and get them to make their characters. Beel apologized like crazy for you having to track him in down in order to get his character made. The poor guy was in the middle of peak Fangol season and had completely forgotten. Once the two of you sat down in the kitchen with an empty character sheet in one hand and snacks in the other, Beel gave you his full attention. He put a lot of thought in his character and wanted to make it really good since he appreciated that you were doing something that they could all do as a family. He bashfully decided to play a halfling. Not only did the little creatures share his love for food, but he thought it would be neat to try being small for once. His class was also a surprise. After carefully flipping through all of the class options, he had eventually settled on a cleric. "They're the healers, right? This way I can help the others if someone gets hurt." You gave him a huge hug then and there. Belphegore, on the other hand, was not so easy to work with. "Belphie, come on. Just flip through the book and choose something!" He groaned into his pillow and rolled onto his side to glare at you. "I told you I would play if you did all the work for me. Me flipping through a book is work. It's not happening." After an entire hour of trying to get him to cooperate, you gave up. In retaliation you made his character a goblin barbarian, just to drive in the fact of how much of a brat he was acting like.

Finally, the day came for you all to play the one-shot, and much like you expected, it was complete and utter chaos. You had tried to maintain some structure and keep everyone on track, but it was hopeless. Levi and Satan were taking the game seriously and, Diavolo bless them, were the only reason their party was making any progress. Mammon was trying to pick-pocket every non-player character that they met while Asmo distracted them by flirting. This worked great for them until Mammon got caught and would've died from the resulting injuries if it wasn't for Beel. Speaking of Beel, the poor fella was trying his best to do well in the game but kept getting confused by all the rules and different stats and modifiers. Belphegor spent most of his time, trying to explain it to his twin, but in the end, Beel accidentally ate his dice and Belphie passed out on his shoulder. And then there was Lucifer. He had been mostly quiet the entire game. Surprisingly, he let Levi and Satan take the charge in any investigations and puzzle-based interactions, but he did so with a smirk. You had a funny feeling in your stomach that he was up to something, and you were right. It was the final boss. Satan and Levi were on the edge of their seats, having worked so hard to get the party to this point. You smiled, knowing that one of the best parts of D&D was finally taking down the big bad. In this case, you had prepared a beholder for them to fight. It would be no easy task. The fight should have required them to work together in an epic battle of wits, magic and melee attacks. Only, when everyone rolled initiative, Lucifer went first. The eldest smiled as his eyes sparked menacingly. "For my bonus action, I'd like to use my hex blade's curse on it, which allows me to add my plus four proficiency bonus to all damage, and makes any rolls of nineteen or twenty critical hits. I will then use my long sword with divine smite at third level to attack him and attack him again using my extra attack," barely giving you time to process what he said, Lucifer rolled his dice twice. "And that would be a nineteen and a natural twenty, meaning they're both criticals due to the curse. That should hit, yes?" "Wha-" You could only watch as Lucifer, now with twice the amount of damage due to his critical rolls pulled out a disgusting number of dice and rolled them all. And of course, with his luck, they all rolled high. "So that's 90 points of damage plus the extra damage from the curse and the bonus from my duelist ability per attack, brings this 102 points," he smugly perched his chin on top of his hands as the table gaped at him. You gulped and looked down at the beholder's character sheet, "Y-You just took o-over half of his hit points in one round..." His grin widened at the information, "What, like it's hard?" You never got the chance to finish the game, as Satan burst into his demon form and pounced on Lucifer, the eldest laughing like a mad man, while Levi tore up his character sheet in a fit of jealous rage. Levi never asked to play with everyone again after that. ***This was just so self-indulgent and I just- I loved it. It combined two of my favourite things and I have never been happier. This was more crack than fluff, but either way, it was fun and I hope you nerds out there enjoyed it 🥰 Thanks again for the request @bagelsinatoaster!*** Taglist: @mimik248 @roseytoesy @ester-is-here

[chai-latte-knight]

Dear Gamers, Readers, Dreamers

You jump into these worlds, so quick. Deeply getting invested, until the world you live in falls away and you immerse yourself utterly into that new universe. Marinating in the escapism of it all. Watching or being in the role of hero, the builders, the lovers, the excitement of having control over ones destiny and autonomy. Often taking accountability for this other world's problems by watching the through reading or jumping into the multiverse that is a save file of those games... yet, how often do we do this with our own lives.

Yes we go about our daily lives, perhaps "pay it forward", but really, how is it that so many of use grew up with wonderful stories and games of a heroes who save the world... yet ours is falling to ruin.

How many of us are actually trying to be the hero of this world? We work so hard to save the realms of our stories in games and give our watchful mind's eye to our precious pages... yet our world is dying, our people are dying, the creatures and beasts of this world are literally on thin ice... yet here WE are. The heroes of relms, the readers of countless fates... we all need a distraction, we all need to feel like we can accomplish something, we all want to feel like we know more then what's being said... yet we feel so powerless to stand up to those multibillion dollar companies that are ravaging this world, OUR world...

Our word's scientists say we have 6 years before climate change is irreversible...

Sounds like the beginning of some sort of netflix movie... but it isnt it? I wonder who in the future will read our stories and ask themselves how we let it all happen. How we just sat here, investing our time in saving universes and world of our human creation in the multiverse of the save files, while it all crumbled down around us... there is no easy answer, there is no easy path, there is no old man mentor who's going to come get us for this epic quest, there is no magic spellbook to empower us, there is no radioactive spiders or destiny amulets... there is only us.

"The heroes journey" is the most popular storyline we all tend to love... but our storyline is not so simple. We cannot make change by traditional means anymore. We need to start looking at the positions of power and realise they've been paid off by the bad guys. We MUST vote for our destiny to change and in some casses voting isn't enough like that two party system in the usa. We need to start becoming the people in those positions, there is no sword nor beast to slay, we must take up the pen and aim our 'active quest' to becoming the ones in power or voting in those who will stand up and be the heroes this world, OUR world needs.

We have 6 years... this isn't a flipping switch, this is a slow decent, look at the news, look at the fires, the storms the floods, the wars, the starvation, the rising prices, the rebelling farmers.... the screams of the innocent dying, crying out for help. Look at us saving these other man made realms of escapism... how long before the famine empties our local shelves, how long until the flood waters kiss our doorsteps, how long until the choking heat of smoke makes your skies orange and hazy... we turn a blind eye in fear, and run into the safety of these worlds. Fixing their problems seems so much easier, our human made worlds being repaired over and over again by each reader and each players save files... I wonder if anyone will ever read our story some day.

I sit here somewhat cynically. I'm interested in saving this world yet I am also a gamer, reader, dreamer... I do not want to loose faith that we'll manage to make everything right in the end as a society... but the fact is, the people in charge, the people handling the money (paying the politicians like sportscare racers who have the sponsorship logo patches on their vest) are the only ones who can change things, yet they feed their wallets until we'll all burn like they always have. They're only REAL power is purchasing and getting us to purchase their goods. They use politicans and judges as their tools, without them they are mostly defanged.

So dear gamers, readers and dreamers... please, please vote, please try to run for office, please try to do at least do some small thing in ONE main mission quests of YOUR world.

My world is dying and I'm tierd of fighting. The indomitable souls around me, my fellow heros, busy in other worlds. I can't fight this all alone, no one can. The ones who have been fighting, protesting, we all need to help them. Protesting is going mostly on def ears, for the villain won't just stop if we ask nicely.

We need to take back the tools and place them in the hands who aren't corrupted by big gass/plastic companies and so on. We need to ask the companies that we work for to change, even if its a small change as getting them to stop using plastic knives and forks at work... even if it means being brave and doing a presentation to our boss how a filter on the chimney to our plant will help keep immisions down and telling them of the tax exemptions some governments have. We need to tell our city leaders we want the rivers cleaned, we need to volunteer at clean up beaches organizations, we need to get salmon selling companies interested in saving their products eco systems and breeding grounds, what ever it takes, what ever small quest we can do to help the bigger one. We don't have the luxury of a save file, we can't just flip the pages or write fanfic to make it all better. This life is the only save file / cannon we have

This main quest, cannot be completed alone by one hero... but maybe, maybe we many heroes of 'man made' realms, doing small mini task quests to complete OUR worlds main storyline... maybe, we can have a chance... we only need one chance to make things right.

Sincerely, just another voice in the void, that dares to hope

[let-them-read-fics]

Yours Truly (Pt. 1)

Requested By: Some of you!

Pairing: Jisoo x Fem!Reader

AU: College

Word Count: ~ Part 1 -> 9,786 // Part 2 -> 7,433

Warnings / Misc. -- Pining, Angst, Fluff

Disclaimer: This writing is a work of fiction, and no disrespect is meant for those mentioned herein.

A/N: Hey everyone! I finally have a few days off, so we're back to our (semi) regularly scheduled programming with this fic! I really hope you enjoy it; lmk what you think :)

PS ~ Once again, I had to split it into two parts to appease the Tumblr Overlords.

♡ Happy Reading ♡

Part 2 -- Click Here

🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤

1.) A Day In Class

Where does true beauty come from?

Is it strictly based in someone's DNA, rooted entirely in the attractiveness of their features? Or is deeper than that; does it extend from their soul? The very essence of stardust and personality that makes them them? Is it in how they interact with others? How they carry themselves? 

You, being the wannabe philosopher that you are, love hearing people's answers to those questions. Every response is unique in its own way, altered depending on the person asked, and you find that to be one of humanity's most wonderful qualities. Like snowflakes, we're all different; as such is our definition of beauty. It lies in the eye of the beholder, subjective in its nature, and you find that comforting. Just think: if 99% of the world's population found you unattractive, 78,000,000 would beg to differ. 

Though, for one person, you're sure those rules don't apply. She's objectively beautiful, and no one even attempts to pretend otherwise. 

Who, you may ask? Kim Jisoo, of course -- head of your school's student council, resident girl next door, and keeper of your heart. She's poised in every way, and refined to the point that you question if you're even deserving of knowing her. Humor and kindness radiate from her no matter where she goes, so it's really no surprise that so many people love her. 

A tap on your shoulder pulls you from your thoughts, and you turn to look at your best friend. "Yo, Y/N. What did you get for number 32?" Jeong asks from his seat in the row directly behind you, trying to be as inconspicuous as possible. Your history professor likely wouldn't take kindly to being interrupted during his lecture, so you choose to show him your answer instead of responding out loud. 

Jeong thanks you and continues to work on the activity you finished nearly 15 minutes ago, leaving you to half-heartedly listen to your professor. You're a good student, but even you have a limit to how much monotonous speaking you can handle in one sitting. As his words drone on, you roll your neck -- intending for the action to relieve some of the tension in your aching muscles; you're in for a surprise, however, when you lock eyes with none other than Jisoo herself. She offers a warm smile and wave, and the innocent actions send swarms of butterflies to take flight in your stomach. After sitting there for a moment, dumbstruck by her beauty, you snap to and return the gesture, making her giggle quietly. 

Huh. So that's what angels sound like, then.

She turns back to her work after a minute, flipping the page every so often as she follows along with the lesson. You take note of how her eyes dart across the materials laid out on her desk, how her fingers mindlessly flirt with the edge of her sleeve in contemplation when she gets to a question that stumps her.

Never have you ever found yourself in such inner turmoil before. The sight before you begs to be seen -- to be admired -- but class continues on. As much as you try to fight it, your resolve eventually crumbles; foreign concepts now falling on fully deaf ears, you allow yourself to be entranced. 

2.) Out In The Square

A Few Hours Later

Throngs of people stretch out before you, everyone making their way to various parts of campus as the blazingly hot sun beats down on them. Some run like their lives depend on it -- likely having overslept or missed campus transit -- while others take their time, catching up with friends and gossiping all the while. The soft pfft of sprinklers set up across the sections of lawn around you can be heard, going off every so often, and occasionally they're followed by the shouts of some unfortunate people getting soaked. 

"You're so lucky, Y/N," Jeong groans from behind you. A grimace sits on his face as he flips through the pages of his Trigonometry book, looking for the reference graphs again. "No more classes for the rest of the week and you don't have any more assignments to finish? Remind me again how to become a teacher's pet, please." You roll your eyes with an amused smile, leaning back on your elbows to talk to him. 

"I'm not a teacher's pet, Jeong. I just do my work on time instead of partying every night." He picks up a leftover piece of bread from the picnic basket that sits to his right and tosses it at you in retaliation to your little remark. 

"I don't care what you say, those parties are always epic. One of these days I'll convince you to come along." 

You shake your head, knowing there's no way you'd willingly attend one of them. From his stories, all those "epic" nights consist of is ridiculously drunken beer pong, sweaty people doing jello shots, and regrets.

"Not in a million years, loser." You say adamantly, not letting him trick himself into believing he's capable of swaying you. 

With one last muttered phrase of, "we'll see about that," he returns to his studies, and you turn your attention elsewhere.

Scattered light filters in through the leaves of the tree you're sitting under, wrapping you in a blanket of warmth as your eyes scan across the crowd again. The sight brings to mind an idea that always fascinates you: everyone you meet is busy creating their own stories, writing and rewriting new possibilities and endings for themselves with each new choice they make. You can hear snippets of their conversations -- see instances of some having their best days while others are living through their worst -- and it really puts things into perspective. Although we may appear as side characters in those books of life that others are writing for themselves, we have no idea what they're going through at any given moment. So, you believe, that makes it all the more important to leave a positive impact on them; whether it be a kind smile, holding the door, or even a simple compliment, you're determined to have your legacy be one rooted in kindness. 

Speaking of kindness in human form…

There she is, you think to yourself, feeling that all too familiar pitter patter of your heart pick up. Jisoo exits Building C, where her latest lecture just ended, and rushes down the stairs with her books in her arms. She's studying to become an actress, as far as you know, and you can't help but smile at the thought; she'll make an amazing star someday. 

You watch as she meets up with 3 other girls, whom you immediately recognize as Lisa, Rosé, and Jennie, and they eagerly bounce their way over to the refreshment truck that one of your school's clubs had been so considerate to hire. It's the perfect day for a cold treat, after all. 

Jisoo's dark hair flows in the gentle breeze that rolls in, looking like silk as it rides the currents. She's gorgeous in every way, and you can't help but be smitten; besides, it's not like you're not alone in your pining. She practically has the entire student body wrapped around her finger. 

"Y/N, don't forget to blink. You're staring pretty hard," Yuqi says, raising up onto her elbow beside Jeong. He laughs with her, but his eyes remain glued to the notebook paper he's scribbling his work onto.

Your eyes dart away following her statement, and you know you've been caught. "I thought you were asleep," you bite back, attempting to hide the blush of embarrassment that's quickly flooding to your cheeks. 

"I was, but I guess my intuition as your best friend woke me up. It's my mission in life to tease you." 

"So I've gathered," you sarcastically smile at each other, making stupid faces like always. 

"You love me," she flips her hair over her shoulder, appearing self-assured with the smirk that tugs at her lips. 

"Do I though? I don't know sometimes..." she socks you in the arm, making you chuckle. 

"All jokes, babe. Don't pout," you pinch her cheek until she grins, and then she begins telling you all about the dream she just had. 

----

Jisoo leads her gang over to one of the nearby tables, making sure to choose her seat strategically. A special someone caught her attention earlier, as they have from the moment she first laid eyes on them months ago, and she hasn't been able to fight the urge to admire them. She watches as they laugh along with something their friend said, tilting their head back as the cheerful noise rings out. She finds herself smiling along, imagining what it would be like to make them laugh like that; it's a uniquely wonderful sound, and she can't help but adore it. 

They lean across the blanket they're sitting on and dig through a picnic basket, retrieving what seems to be a sandwich packaged up in plastic wrap. One of their friends exaggeratedly thanks them, tackling them to the ground in a messy hug with a shout of gratitude that even Jisoo can hear from across the square. 

"Earth to Jisoo!" Jennie says, raising her voice slightly as she snaps her fingers in front of the unnie. The former jolts back to attention with a little jump, clearing her throat to gather her thoughts. 

"You know, you could always go talk to him. I've heard he's sweet." She tells the other girl, noticing the look of longing that's befallen her features. 

"Yeah, Joy has Art with him on Thursdays. I think his name's Jeong or something like that." Lisa butts in before taking another lick of her ice cream. 

Despite being so smart, the girls are really oblivious sometimes; Jisoo wasn't looking at him at all. She was looking at you. 

She doesn't know if now is the right time to tell them that, though. She hasn't officially come out to them, but she isn't afraid that they won't accept her -- she just wants that moment to be special, and sweating in the middle of the campus square doesn't seem like the golden opportunity that she's been hoping for.

"Just eat your treats, knuckleheads." She concludes, taking a spoonful of the shaved ice she opted for instead of ice cream. The truck had multiple types of treats, with all kinds of different toppings and flavorings lining the walls.

"Okay…" Rosé trails off before adding, "but don't say we didn't try to help when you start wishing you had said something later." Jisoo uses her spoon to lower the one that Rosie had raised accusingly at her, reassuring the girl that she'd be fine. 

She knows it's a lie, though; as the 4 of them later toss their trash in the bins and make their way to the student council room, Jisoo sneaks a last wistful glance at you, wishing she would've had the courage to start a conversation.

3.) One Step Closer

Friday, 1:34 PM -- A Few Days Later

"Hey, Minji. How many do we have today?" You wave at what kids have already been dropped off, your presence making their little faces light up with joy. 

Your coworker responds from across the room, tossing a couple stray toys into their labeled baskets to keep the space tidy. "10 or so, I think. The last ones should be arriving soon." You nod and take off your coat, setting your things in one of the small cubbies against the wall just beyond the entrance. 

"Y/N!" A small voice shouts from behind the counter, hidden from view. You smile deeply when you realize who it is, and you quickly dart around the corner to say hello. His chubby hands cover his mouth, but they do little in hiding his adorable grin. "Seungbum! How's my little munchkin?!" He squeals and runs into your arms, giggling loudly when you pick him up and spin him around. His dark hair sways from side to side with the movement, the slight waves sticking out in random places. A few seconds later, he wraps his arms around your neck and pulls back to look at you, settling into your secure hold. 

"Can we play when Jia gets here? I promised her I'd show her the new trick I learned, but I wanna show you, too." 

You smile at the sweet sentiment. "Of course, buddy. As long as you eat well at snack time, we can play however much you want." You raise an eyebrow at him, showing your authority, before saying, "I saw you put your veggies in your pocket last time and skip to dessert, so it'd better not happen again." He lowers his head after realizing he had been caught, and a hint of redness flushes his cheeks in embarrassment. 

"Okay Y/N-yah." 

You tickle him to make sure he knows you aren't mad at him, and soon he's laughing again. "Now, go wash your hands and get settled at the table, please." 

"Yes ma'am." His tiny sneakers squeak against the floor as he races off towards one of the lowered sinks that borders the kitchen wall, and you shake your head with a smile. 

Not even a second later, you feel a soft tug at your pant leg, and you turn around to find the source. 

A head of brilliantly auburn hair is the first thing you see, and its shade compliments the child's outfit perfectly. "Hi sweetheart. Are you new?" You squat down to the young girl's level, noting how she shyly toys with her fingers as they rest in front of her. She nods, the movement so subtle that you almost don't notice it. 

"My name's Y/N, and that awesome lady over there," you lean closer to her and point towards your coworker, "...is Minji. You can stay with us today, or you can play with the others, okay?" She nods again, her mannerisms letting you know just how shy she really is. Gently taking one of her hands, you hold it and look at her with a reassuring smile, asking, "Will you tell me your name?" 

"I'm Aera." She meekly says, only maintaining eye contact for a second or two. 

"That's a beautiful name," you compliment, seeing progress as she lightly smiles at your words. "And I love your bow," you add, touching the delicate material that rests near her ear, nestled into her straight locks. It has cherry blossoms and butterflies on it, all vibrant and neatly colored. 

"Thank you, I picked it out myself." She perks up a bit now, raising her head to look at you with a proud smile. "Wow, really?" You put on an impressed expression, wanting to boost her confidence even more. "You'll have to help me choose one the next time I go shopping, then. You're great at it." The praise makes her chuckle, and her eyes squint into soft crescents in the process. 

After stealing a glance at the table where everyone else has already gathered, you realize that they're waiting on you to start. "Alright, Aera, it's time to grab a bite to eat. Do you want to sit with me, or are you ready to be with the others?" You tilt your head to the side, asking the question softly so she doesn't feel overwhelmed. Having had this job for a while, you've gotten the hang of adjusting your behavior to put them at ease. 

"With you," she says, growing a little timid again at the idea of mingling with them yet. "That's perfectly fine." You reassure her, smiling one more time before standing and leading her to the room. Her hand remains clutched in yours, wiggling around slightly from the height difference as she looks around. 

"Who's ready for some snacks?" Minji asks the group, laughing when they all raise their hands and get excited. Their high pitched voices carry around the room as they discuss what foods they want to trade with each other, and soon everyone is happily munching away. You rub Aera's back sweetly as she eats some cucumber sticks, swinging her feet through the air beneath the short chair you retrieved from the table for her. She looks up into your eyes with a smile, melting your heart with the cuteness of her full cheeks. You squish them before turning away, feeling your 6th sense kick in as you scan your eyes across the rest of the group. 

"Seungbum…" you warn, catching the way he's mischievously eyeing the carrots laid out before him on the table. He pokes at one of them and sighs, eventually giving in as he takes a hesitant bite of it. With some more convincing, he finishes the rest of the pack and gets started on his dessert. 

----

Honestly, you feel sorry for the birds outside.

They must have had hundreds of mini heart attacks upon hearing the somehow earth-shattering roar of the 10 young kids, all blasting out the side door towards the playground. Some of them automatically race towards the swings or slides, while others approach the basket of toys and sports equipment. Aera, however, hangs back, her entire hand wrapped around just a few of your fingers. "What do you wanna do?" She shrugs, looking around at the different activities that the others are already starting. 

"I can push you on the swings, or we could race. There're some monkey bars and a merry-go-round, too, that nobody's using right now." You suggest, hoping to catch her interest with one of them. Her attention snaps up to you at that last option, and she dramatically drops her jaw. "Did you say merry-go-round?" You nod with an amused grin, laughing when she lets out a cute noise of joy. After pointing her in the direction of it, she dashes off ahead of you and makes her way to it, only stopping to make sure you're still coming with her once she gets there.

"Hold on tight, little one." You advise, cheering when she giggles in anticipation. Her chuckles fill the airwaves as you spin the bar around, making sure not to pull too hard and make her too dizzy. You were once a kid, too, though, so you make it a point to add some serious speed every now and then to keep her entertained and happy. You remember playing on these all day when you were her age.

---

"Auntie!" Aera shrieks, excitedly thundering towards the fence that borders the playground. You finish cheering Seungbum on after watching his trick, grinning as he tries to flirt with Jia; she looks impressed. You turn around at Aera's commotion, feeling your eyes practically pop out of your head at who you see standing on the other side. 

"How was your day, my love?" Jisoo asks sweetly, leaning over the metal divider to run a hand through her niece's hair lovingly. She still hasn't noticed your presence, and for that you don't know if you're relieved or saddened. Watching her interact with the young girl is quite adorable, though, and you're distracted from your personal gay panic for the time being. 

"I've had so much fun. And Y/N-yah said she likes my hair clip! I told you this one was prettier than the one with just trees on it!" Aera says smugly, happy to have her decision pay off and prove her aunt wrong. Jisoo tenses up, not expecting to hear your name right now. Seeing that this is her first time picking Aera up, she had no idea you work at the daycare; though she'd be lying to say that it comes as a surprise -- you're a very warm person, so it's no wonder that you're good with kids. 

As per Aera's request, you walk across the playground and join her in front of Jisoo. Now it's your turn to be shy; you sneak a glance at the student council president and immediately feel your cheeks heat up, so you busy yourself by patting Aera on the head. She hugs your leg and settles against your side, causing Jisoo to raise her eyebrows. "I'm impressed, Y/N. She usually doesn't open up to new people very easily." 

"Ah, I'm surprised that such a cool girl like her wanted to hang out with me." You tease, tickling her side lightly when she hides behind the material of your shirt. "Do you want to come in and see what she drew today? She's definitely skilled." You suggest, trying not to sound too hopeful as you muster up the courage to look at Jisoo again. She's already smiling at you, a soft sort of adoration shining in her eyes as they rake over your features. She accepts your offer, and you walk over to the gate to let her in. Aera demands that you carry her, so you scoop her up into your arms as you make your way back into the daycare center. Her head sits on your shoulder, and you can feel her playfully making faces at Jisoo the entire way; her tiny frame jolts with each loud giggle she lets out, and the sound makes you smile. 

---

"Yeah, she was my sidekick for the day." You respond to Jisoo, continuing your conversation as you watch Aera remove her drawing from the cork board that she taped it to earlier. Displaying the kids' artwork is something that you advocated for when you first began working here, and you're so glad you did; they always get excited to share their works. 

"She's a lucky girl, then." She says, doing her best to ignore the feeling of your eyes on her. Focusing on anything other than you is already hard enough for her, but she knows there'd be no hope left if she gives in now. 

"Y/N helped me draw this. She doodled Dalgom in the corner," Aera cheerily says, breaking the slight tension in the air as she approaches the table. Most of the other kids have already been picked up, and Minji's watching the handful that haven't. 

"It's not very good," you cringe, scratching the back of your neck. You've seen him a few times since the beginning of the year, whether it be on walks across campus with Jisoo, or perched on her desk during "bring your pet to class" day. 

"It's adorable; Dalgomie will be honored when I show it to him." Jisoo says with a nod, shutting down your insecurities within a second. You fail to contain the laugh that slips past your lips, disbelief present in your voice as you ask, "You're going to show him?" She looks at you like you have 3 heads. "It would be a disgrace not to."

With a breathy chuckle, you say, "You're so strange. I like it, though." 

Jisoo smiles at that, and the three of you discuss all of the fun things you did that day. Jisoo tells you about the classes she had to sit through, and even how she stepped in gum and had to borrow a pair of Rosé's shoes. 

---

All good things must come to an end, though, and after about half an hour of talking, it was time to say goodbye. 

You lead them out the door and down the sidewalk as per Aera's request, yet again (that child is basically a mini dictator at this point, but she's cute so she gets a free pass). As she rustles around her bag in search of her keys, Jisoo accidentally knocks her earbud case out, sending it tumbling to the ground. "Oh! Here, I'll grab it for you." You kindly offer, stepping past her to retrieve it from the grass. She takes it from you with a word of gratitude uttered in that angelic voice of hers, and you begin your goodbyes upon hearing Minji call your name. 

"I'll see you around, Jisoo. And Aera, I expect to see you next week." You wiggle a finger at the little girl, donning a shocked expression when she pretends to bite it. "Can't you tell we're related?" Jisoo asks with a smile, ruffling her niece's hair. "The resemblance is uncanny," you laugh, watching as both of them join in with you. 

"Y/N, come on!" Minji whines, sounding like a toddler herself. You initially go to brush off her request in order to spend a few more seconds with the two of them, but when she stands in the doorway, entering your line of sight, you see why she's so desperate for your help -- two of the children still waiting on their parents are climbing on her, about to knock her over at any second. Her face is beet red from the effort she's exerting, and her hair is mussed wildly. 

"Oh shhh---" you start, catching yourself when Jisoo widens her eyes at you and goes to cover Aera's ears, "--shiitake mushrooms!" You finish with a nervous smile, gaining a stunned laugh from your crush. "Bye girls; gotta go. I'm on my way, Minji!" You call out like a superhero, running to her aid as fast as your legs will carry you. 

Jisoo watches you wrangle one of the squirmy kids off of her and initiate a tickle fight to distract him and give Minji time to deal with the other one. She smiles like a dork at your actions, realizing she would be content with watching you all day. You're a natural with them, and seeing you in action is something she wishes she had the chance to do more often. With that, she turns around and picks Aera up; the youngster nuzzles into her embrace, lazily slumping onto her after having such a tiring day. As Jisoo goes to take a step forward, she notices something on the ground: a piece of paper. It's been folded neatly many times, and it reminds her of the notes she would always pass to her friends back in elementary school. Her curiosity gets the better of her, and she can't resist the urge to pick it up. 

"To The Girl Who'll Never Know I Love Her"

Her eyes scan across the words and she unfolds the note, making sure to keep a steady grip on Aera with her other arm. An almost unnoticeable signature is scribbled in the bottom corner, and she nearly scares Aera by squealing in pleasant surprise. 

It's your name, curled into the letters that are so uniquely yours; the paper must've fallen out of your pocket when you bent down to get her case earlier. 

After buckling her niece into her car seat and climbing into the driver's seat, Jisoo unfolds the note again and begins reading. She's like a giddy kid all over again, and part of her feels bad for giving into temptation. She reasons with herself by promising to give it back to you the next time she sees you, and that manages to rid her conscience of some of the guilt she feels. For now, though, she's eager to see what it contains. 

The first thing to catch her eye is a poem written neatly underneath a doodle of a rabbit, likely serving as some sort of label. Everyone on campus knows of her nickname and resemblance to rabbits, and she can't help but hope that your drawing wasn't simply a coincidence. 

Poison, is what you are

A bittersweet mix, intoxicatingly beautiful 

For one glance from you

Steals every breath I had so foolishly believed was mine to take

For one smile from you

Sends me reeling, falling all over again

She nearly swoons at the words, rereading them multiple times over and imagining you saying them to her. She wonders how the syllables would fall from your lips, which ones you'd stress to alter the meaning into whatever you imagined when you wrote them. Whether or not they're written for her, she may never know; all she's aware of right now is how they make her feel, and how that feeling is one that she never wants to stop experiencing.

4.) Practice Makes Perfect

2 Weeks, 3 Exams, and 1 Mental Breakdown Later

"Coming!" You call out, using all of your strength to push your rolling chair away from your desk and across the room towards the door. 

"Y/N L/N, at your service," you say, doing a little bow in your seat. Upon looking up to see who's in front of you, your eyes lock with the same girl who's been living in your mind rent free ever since you met her. 

"Jisoo!" You announce a little louder than intended, scrambling up into a standing position before kicking the chair backwards. You wince when it collides with something behind you, filling the room with noise as a few of your knick knacks clatter to the floor. Jisoo has to fight to contain the smile on her lips, pursing them as she looks towards the ground so as to not embarrass you. 

It's too late though -- you've already made a fool of yourself, and right in front of your crush, no less. 

"What can I do for you?" You ask, finally relaxing your face from its previously scrunched up position. 

"Are you busy right now? I have a favor to ask and you might be the only person who can help me out." Her eyebrows raise inquisitively at you, quirking up in that special way they always do when she's focusing in class. 

She could ask you to do just about anything, and you'd be agreeing without hesitation; no questions asked. 

"N-no, just doing a little studying is all. How can I help?" You'd normally curse yourself for sounding so shy, but she looks especially gorgeous tonight and you can't even blame yourself for it. The fluorescent bulbs of the dorm's hallway fail to even put a dent in the glow she's radiating, and that's no small feat -- those horrible little things are usually capable of making anyone look bad, and yet, once again, Jisoo manages to break the mold. 

"Mrs. Choi assigned a rehearsal for me tonight, and I need a peer to score how well I do. I trust you to do it." She says, having no idea how much her words are affecting you. 

Review portions of the semester are crucial to every major's success, but arguably none so much as those studying to be actors. The peer and admin reviews that they receive account for a large chunk of their grade, so you can imagine how nerve-racking it would be to put that kind of power in someone else's hands. You're touched that she trusts you with it. 

"I'd love to help, Jisoo. Just curious, though: why don't you have one of the girls help? They probably know more about it than me, after all." Everyone knows how close JenChuLiChaeng are, so her decision to choose you is genuinely intriguing. 

Shit. For some reason, Jisoo hadn't anticipated that you'd ask that question. The thought had never crossed her mind earlier, when she was preoccupied with convincing herself to come in the first place, so she has to think something up on the fly. 

"They're all busy with work. Couldn't afford to lose any precious cramming time, you know?" She says, a hint of nervousness behind the small laugh she lets out. It's uncharacteristic for her, considering she's usually so confident all the time, but you think it's adorable.

"Ryujin's the same way," you tease, turning your head to look at your roommate. She's across the room on her bed, reading through her book as she holds her middle finger up to let you know she heard your comment. "What a sweetie," you coo, blowing a kiss at her that makes her roll her eyes and smile despite herself. She pretends to be hardcore, but after spending the past few months with her you've discovered that she's actually the human embodiment of a cinnamon roll. 

"Well," you say, turning back to Jisoo, "when do you have to start?" 

She pulls her sleeve back to glance at her watch before returning her gaze to you. "Gotta be back at the dorm in 10 minutes." 

Your eyebrows shoot up in surprise, the inner honor student in you already panicking. "10 minutes?! It's all the way across campus, Jisoo!" 

She laughs at you now, bringing a hand up to cover her mouth. "I'm kidding; we still have a couple hours. You should've seen your face, though. Priceless." 

"That's no way to treat someone who practically has your grade resting in their hands." You say smugly, a little smirk playing on your lips when her jaw drops dramatically.

"You wouldn't dare," she narrows her eyes, referencing the notion that you might give her bad marks because of that little prank. 

"Maybe, or maybe not. Perhaps I'll be merciful if you take me to get something to eat first." 

"Food as a peace offering? Alright, I can do that."

You smile, doing a dorky little cheer at that. "Okay, I'll be right out; just give me a second to make myself look presentable." 

Jisoo accepts your words with a curt nod, but she wants to tell you that you already look more than presentable. When you first opened the door earlier and she saw you in your study glasses, she couldn't help but smile like a fool; you're adorable, especially to her, and she wishes you could see that. 

A couple minutes later you exit your dorm and find her leaned up against the hallway wall, her hands fidgeting in front of her. Is she nervous?

"So, where would you like to go?" You ask, pulling the thin material of your jacket over your shoulders. It's lightweight -- seeing as how the weather doesn't call for a large one -- and it feels soft against your skin. 

As the two of you fall into step with each other, she responds, "It's up to you, princess. Since I'm at your mercy and all." Her smirk is visible in your peripheral. 

The nickname causes your heart to flutter in your chest, thudding around even harder than it had before. "U-uh, how about the noodle place?" You suggest, trying not to cringe at the stutter in your voice. You've heard that she likes chicken and ramen, and that shop is known as the best restaurant on campus for it. 

"110%. You know me so well," she says dreamily, batting her eyelashes at you with a silly smile. 

"Called it," you retort, brushing your shoulder off nonchalantly. "Now come on, I'm hungry and ready to spend all of your money." Her hand slips into yours when you reach down for it, almost instinctively, feeling like it was meant to be there all along, and you tug her down the hallway towards the elevator. 

----

"I know! If Mr. Johnson assigns another project like that then I'll politely be jumping out a window." 

Jisoo laughs at how animated you are, even having to stop chewing her mouthful of food momentarily to make sure she doesn't choke. She really loves hanging out with you; you make everything fun, and all of the stress she feels on a daily basis seems to vanish into thin air. 

"I did pretty bad on that last one," Jisoo adds, grimacing as she remembers her score. 

"You literally got a 93 out of 100, shut up." You shake your head with an amused smile, reaching across the table to snatch a piece of gimbap from her plate. 

"Hey--" she goes to yell at you, but her phone vibrates against the table, successfully stopping her. 

"Hello?" She answers, silently starting a chopstick war with you when you reach for another piece. When the person on the other end begins talking, she stops playing in order to concentrate on what they're saying. 

"Did she cancel?" She asks, furrowing her brow as her lips form into a natural pout. She sighs, rubbing her temple gently as the conversation continues. "Okay, I'm out with a friend right now, but you can go ahead and head that way. We'll meet you there. Alright, love you, too. Bye." 

You raise an eyebrow, wordlessly requesting info about what new plan you're being involved in. "That was my brother; the babysitter cancelled on them last minute, so we have to watch Aera for a few hours." Jisoo loves her niece dearly, but she can't deny that she wanted to spend the evening alone with you. She's afraid the little girl will steal all of your attention away, as childish as that may seem. 

"You're such a good person," you compliment, only to frown when she brushes off your words. "I mean it, Jisoo. You always take care of everybody around you; it's admirable. Now take the compliment or I'll team up with Aera later and tease you." 

She rolls her eyes with a smile, saying, "You're gonna do that regardless." 

"That's not the point," you pout, stomping your foot on the ground lightly. 

"Fine; tis I, Jisoo, the greatest person in all of existence. Happy now?" 

"Ecstatic." You beam at her, returning back to your cheery self. "I'll go grab some boxes for us, okay?" She nods, and you scurry off on your mission. 

----

Back At Jisoo's Dorm

Images flash across the large, flatscreen TV mounted to the wall across from you, displaying scenes of whatever cartoon the network decided to air right now. Aera isn't being picky; she's content with sitting in your lap, mindlessly fidgeting with the necklace that loosely dangles from your neck as she remains entranced by the screen. Your arms are around her to make her feel secure, and her small frame racks against you with every sweet giggle she lets out anytime a new joke is told by one of her favorite characters. 

Jisoo observes from the kitchen, leaning back against the countertop to settle in while she waits for Aera's favorite snack to heat up. She watches as you point to various things on the TV, having her name the ones she knows and teaching her others that she doesn't. 

She loves seeing you like this. You're beaming in that special way that sets her heart on fire, and the flames are only fanned when you turn to look at her. Somehow, the sight reminds her of the first time she met you:

It was orientation week -- the beginning of the school year -- and you were taking a tour around campus with some of your friends. You were lucky to have them; you'd only kept in contact with a handful of people from high school, knowing full well that most of those relationships were only rooted in superficiality, never meant to last. But this motley crew was different; they saw you for you, and all of you genuinely enjoyed each other's company. It didn't have the same air of awkward tension as the fake friendships had -- this was real and honest, and you thanked your lucky stars for them on the daily. 

All of you had managed to get into your dream schools, and the reality was bittersweet; you'd all be moving away from each other and beginning your own lives, having less and less time for each other in the process. You were beyond proud of them, and yourself, for that matter, but it still hurt to think that they wouldn't be just a few blocks away anymore. That you couldn't just swing by their house to go on a late night drive through the city like you used to. As exciting as your new experiences were bound to be, part of you was terrified; your life up until now had been fairly safe, creating a little security blanket to protect you from all that life had in store, but now you were on your own and the idea was a bit daunting. The memories you made together comforted you, though, and kept the sadness at bay. 

"Dude, this place is sick. How did you manage to make it in again?"

"Because she's smart, dumbass. We should be asking you that question."

"Ouch, (Friend's Name), that hurt."

"Do you still have those chips from earlier? I'm starving over here."

"Yeah, here, they're in my bag."

Pockets of separate conversations can be heard from behind you, all of your friends chatting away while you walk ahead of them, map and schedule in hand. The campus is fairly large, and with so many buildings and classrooms it's easy to get confused. You continue walking, running a finger along the map to trace the path you intend to take towards the Help Center. 

In your preoccupied state, you don't even realize that you're headed straight for a trash can that sits on the sidewalk, mere seconds away from colliding with it. 

A passerby notices just in the nick of time, reaching an arm out in front of you to prevent the accident with a noise of warning. You tense up, not expecting the sudden interruption, and look up into the eyes of your savior. Her dark orbs peer back at you, an innocent gleam in them when she sees your lips slowly tug into a smile. 

She mirrors your actions, neither of you saying anything yet. You couldn't utter a word even if you wanted to; her beauty leaves you speechless. 

"That was close," she says quietly, only to you. Your friends have almost caught up with you now, still busy with their own conversations, though they'll tease you once they see a gorgeous stranger's arm wrapped around you. 

"Thank you," you breathe out, clearing your throat as you take a step away from her. 

"Ooh, who's this, Y/N?" One of your friends coos, garnering a chorus of childish "oohs" and kissy noises from the others. Why are they so obnoxious?

You apologetically glance at the girl one more time before turning around to respond to them, but she speaks up before you can. 

"Kim Jisoo." She introduces, facing them with a wide smile. It's easy to see that she's done this before; her tone is pleasant and light, not even a hint of hesitancy in it. She's used to being the center of attention; you can tell by the way she carries herself and commands the space. 

"I see you guys are taking a tour, right?" She looks between all of you, though her eyes linger on you for a second too long to be brushed off as 'just friendly'. 

You nod, saying, "I can't find my last class. It's a Gen Ed one; World History, room 435. The map says it's in Complex D, but the room was vacant when we went by."

She listens intently, paying attention to your every word. "They must've handed out the old maps by accident, then. Mr. Johnson had to move rooms to accommodate larger class sizes. When do you have him?" 

You unfold your schedule again, gazing down at the slightly crumpled sheet until your eyes find their target. "Tuesdays and Thursdays, 1PM." 

Upon registering what you said, Jisoo does her best to contain the grin that threatens to spread across her face. "Ah, same as me! I can take you to the room, if you'd like. That way you can find it next week." She offers, pleased by the fact that she'll be seeing you more often. Your cute mannerisms have already thrown her for a loop, and she wants to get to know you better. 

"That would be great." You let out a relieved laugh, releasing the worry you felt; tours are meant to end within 20 minutes or so, and before Jisoo came you were afraid you'd never find your last class. She's saving the day again, it seems. 

"Great, follow me," she smiles warmly, placing a gentle hand on the small of your back to turn you in the right direction. When you give your friends one last glance over your shoulder, you find them giving you thumbs up with smirks on their faces. One of them puckers their lips at you, and you stick your tongue out in return. 

You're not sure what they'll end up doing while you finish your tour, though it'll likely involve either skating or eating fast food. They have each other to keep themselves entertained, so you're not worried about them in the slightest. You make a mental note to text them when you're done to meet up again. 

Jisoo smiles like an idiot when she realizes what's happening behind her, failing miserably to hide it when you spin back around and give your full attention to her. 

"What?" You ask, leaning in closer to her to nudge her shoulder when she looks away, blushing. 

"Nothing," she shakes her head, only to be prompted by you again. "You're just cute, is all." 

You have to use all your power to hold back the squeal you want to let out at hearing that. Kim Jisoo, as you now know her to be, thinks you're cute? You must be dreaming. 

"That's funny, I don't remember turning into a mirror."

"Yah, babo!" She chuckles, not expecting that as she smacks the back of your head with no real force. The two of you share a laugh and continue talking while you make your way to the room.

Beeping sounds from the microwave bring Jisoo back down to Earth, causing the pleasant memory to fade more and more with every incessant signal that cuts through the air. She grabs a couple heat guards and approaches the machine, carefully opening the steaming package and pouring its contents into a big, shareable bowl. Though it may be Aera's favorite food, she'd be damned to not make enough for the two of you as well. After all, keeping her entertained will take plenty of energy. 

"Did this princess order one heaping bowl of popcorn or am I at the wrong castle?" Jisoo plays, padding into the room with a bright smile on her face as she looks over at her niece. The smell of her snack snaps Aera back to reality, making her eyes light up with pure joy as she leaps off of your lap and runs to Jisoo. She wraps her arms around her legs, thanking her in that sweet little voice of hers as she gazes up at her aunt with stars in her eyes. 

"Thank you, thank you, thank you!" She chants, wiggling her body around in excitement. She lets go when Jisoo goes to walk to the couch, following close behind her like an eager puppy. 

She approaches you again, making grabby hands for you to lift her onto your lap even though she's more than capable of getting up there by herself. Nevertheless, you pull her up with a humored grin, watching as she puts her hands in her lap and patiently waits for the two of you to get a bite first. Her ability to follow manners is commendable, though the slight twitch of her lip when she gets a whiff of the food is pretty adorable. 

"Dig in," you say around your mouthful of food, locking eyes with Jisoo when Aera jumps at the opportunity to follow your instructions. You never have to tell her twice when it comes to food. 

"Yep, definitely related." 

Jisoo laughs at your comment, reaching over top of Aera to flick you in the forehead. She shrugs at your pained exclamation, uttering a nonchalant "Sorry, not sorry," as the two of you crack up together.

----

"Y/N, how the hell did you manage to do that?" Jisoo whispers, not bothering to censor herself when she sees Aera fast asleep in your arms. It's not like she could hear her anyway. 

"She was already kinda tired when she got here; I just made sure to get that last little bit of energy out with the games. Have you forgotten that I know a thing or two about kids?" You tease, turning to her with a smile when you finish walking up the short staircase. 

"You don't understand: usually it takes us hours to settle her down. She's just a totally different person around you." 

"Must be my awesomeness." 

"Hmm, must be," Jisoo hums, quietly opening her bedroom door for you and watching as you carefully lay Aera down. You tuck her under the blankets with care, making sure to brush the hair out of her face and adjust her pillow a bit. Jisoo leans against the doorframe, adding the scene before her to her list of reasons for loving you. Seeing you in such a domestic situation gives her baby fever, and she has to push the persistent feeling away. 

"Ready?" You whisper with one last look over your shoulder, giving Jisoo your undivided attention once you confirm that Aera's alright. 

"Let's do it," she says, pulling the door to but not latching it. The two of you will be in the living room, just down the hall, and you want to be able to hear her in case she needs something. So responsible.

You take in the dorm as Jisoo leads you towards your destination, amazed at how much bigger it is than yours and Ryujin's. This one has separate rooms equipped with their own personal bathrooms, a decent kitchen, and, of course, a living area. Clearly, having ties to the school and being president of the student council come with some major perks. Your socked feet pad against the hardwood floor, and you close what little distance is left between Jisoo and yourself to press your body against her back, wrapping your arms around her. She lets out a little noise of surprise, but doesn't protest; she tucks one of her hands into your clasped ones and uses the other to rub your forearm. 

A few moments later you plop down onto the couch and get comfortable on the cushions. Jisoo digs around in her bag that leans against the tv stand, searching for the script of her upcoming production. Her shirt rides up slightly, giving you a perfect view of her beautifully sculpted stomach, and her skin looks ethereal as it glows in the soft lamplight of the room. Embarrassed for admiring her in such a way, you avert your gaze, failing to notice how she subtly bites her lip as she approaches you; she planned that little show, and it worked. 

"Okay, so here's the scoring sheet," she hands you a semi-formal looking paper, along with a pencil and clipboard to use as a stabilizer. "I'll be reading from the first few pages on my own, but I was wondering if you'd fill in for the male lead for some of the other parts? It's a lot easier to get into character if I have someone's energy to feed off of." 

You smile at how cute she sounded with her little rambled request, and nod. "Of course, Jisoo. I doubt I'll be any good, though." She releases a sigh at that, happy to have you agree; her plan is coming along nicely, but there's always room for things to go wrong. 

"I'm sure you're better than you think." 

"Stop sucking up, Chu. Flattery won't make me raise your grade," you warn, pointing the pencil at her sternly. Your tone sends a shiver down her spine, though it goes unnoticed by you. 

"Let's just get started." She concludes, doing her best to keep from getting too flustered under your already watchful eye. 

----

Her show is well underway, caught somewhere towards the end of act two, and you're enthralled by the performance she's giving. The paper that once rested in your lap is marked up with comments of praise and proud annotations to accompany your high scoring, though now it lays forgotten about on the coffee table, serving no purpose any longer. You finished all of the required sections necessary for your peer review, and now you're just enjoying the journey that Jisoo is continuing to take you on. 

You look back up into her eyes after reading off the lines of the character you're filling in for, looking completely unskilled next to the pure talent that she's exuding. She stands from the couch, looking down at you with an exasperated expression as she remains in character. 

"You don't get it!" She raises her voice slightly, though not loud enough to wake Aera. Even while in the intense mindset she has to be in for her character, she keeps one foot in the reality of this world, making sure to behave appropriately. 

"Enlighten me, then." You stand and retort, shifting a bit closer to her after reciting your line. 

"Only when I'm with you do I feel true happiness. Your kind eyes bring me comfort like no other; I'm safe in your arms. For you, my love," she pauses, her eyes brimming with tears from the emotional words she's spent so much time rehearsing. "...there isn't a thing in this world that I wouldn't do." Your breath is held tightly in your throat, and your hands subconsciously grip onto the material of your jeans. 

Only now do you realize how close the two of you have migrated to one another; she's merely a breath away, so close you can feel the warmth radiating from her. You swallow thickly, feeling your nerves come alive with every second that passes in heated silence, neither of you knowing what to do now. You've lost the desire to read your next line, and she doesn't seem too upset by that fact. Her eyes slowly scan over your features, and the lovesick look in them makes you question if she's still in character or slipping out of it. 

After her gaze darts down to your lips and she licks her own without even realizing it, you seriously begin hoping for the latter of the two options.

She searches your face for any sign of refusal as she leans in closer, now bringing her arms up to wrap around your waist and lightly ball the material of your shirt up into her fists. Your hands rest on her shoulders, and you glide your fingertips over her jawline. A singular nod is the last form of consent that you give her before she pulls you closer. 

Her lips ghost over yours, receiving some of the vanilla balm you applied earlier; her breath hitches when you tug at the collar of her university sweater, teasingly taking her bottom lip between your teeth. She wants to savor this moment, so she fights against her urge to dive right in and get lost in you. 

Within seconds, she's kicking herself for that decision. 

"Auntie? Y/N?" Aera calls sleepily from just around the corner, making the two of you spring away from each other. When she appears less than a second later, you realize how close you had been to getting caught. Jisoo refuses to meet your gaze when you look towards her, and that simple action disheartens you a bit.

"Hey, sweetheart. Bad dream?" You ask, using your inference skills after noticing the way that she's clutching her stuffed bunny close to her chest. Her lip trembles as she nods, and the sight breaks your heart. Quickly, you pick her up again, assuring her that she's safe and that you'd slay any monster that dared to hurt her, even in her dreams. A small smile tugs at her lips, and she brings a fist up to rub her eye. "How about this: I'll do a quadruple check of the room for you, and stay with you until you fall asleep. Sound good?" 

She utters a tired, "Yes, Y/N-yah", before laying her head on your shoulder and waving a goodbye towards Jisoo as you take her back to the room. 

Four sweeps of the room and one fight with a ghost later, you tuck her in again and lay a sweet kiss to her forehead. "Love you," she mumbles lazily, making your heart melt. Kids say that phrase quickly, without even realizing the weight that it has, but you're always glad to accept whatever they imagine it to be. Whether she loves you for playing with her, tucking her in, or defending her honor against imaginary monsters, you don't really care all that much -- she loves you in the ways that she knows how, and that's all that matters.

"I love you, too, Aera. Sleep well." You tuck a piece of hair behind her ear and settle against the wall, prepared to come through on your promise. 

----

"Hey," you start, albeit a bit awkwardly. 

"Hey," Jisoo returns, pushing her leftovers from the restaurant around her plate half-heartedly. You approach the marble countertop that she sits behind, silently begging for her to look up at you. 

"Should we talk about earlier?" You quietly ask, picking at imaginary imperfections on the surface of the countertop. 

"What about it?" 

"We practically kissed--"

"It was in the script to do so, Y/N." She says, finally looking up at you. She sounds a bit hostile now, like she's getting defensive for some unknown reason. 

"Oh," the simple utterance is all you can manage, seeing as how your brain is running a mile a minute. You want to ask if it meant anything else to her -- if she would've taken it farther, had Aera not walked in -- but you don't.  Her tone serves as enough of an answer, and you're not sure you could stand to hear her verbalize your fears anyway. 

"Well I guess I should go, then." You retract your hand and put it in your pocket, realizing how stupid you were for thinking she could like you back. She doesn't; she was just in need of a helping hand tonight, and you offered that. You shouldn't have tried to turn it into anything that it wasn't. 

Hearing the disappointment in your voice makes her want to confess right then and there, but something still holds her back -- some force is yelling at her to keep her feelings hidden for fear of rejection. "I can drive you." 

You shake your head. "Nah, it's okay. I'll have Ryujin come get me. You can't leave Aera here and I wouldn't want to have to wake her up just for you to drive me across campus." Jisoo agrees, realizing that she didn't even think about that at first. 

"Goodnight, Jisoo." You say, heading off towards the front door. She returns the gesture, reminding you to be safe as she locks it behind you and watches you dial up your roommate's number. Before long, she pulls into one of the parking spaces in front of the dorm, and the two of you drive away. 

Click Here For Part 2

[neonacity]

HYACINTHE | CHAPTER 4: JAEMIN X READER

SUMMARY: 

Na Jaemin is far from being your typical 20 year old. Instead of slaving through college, he wastes away his hours cracking safes. Weekends that should be spent partying with friends consist of illegal races on good days and small scale bombings on bad ones. 

Na Jaemin is far from being average, unless you consider being a member of Seoul’s top organized crime family normal. There is no such thing as a sense of normality and peace in his trainwreck of a life, so when he met a barista who was brave enough to call out his dangerous taste in coffee, he was like a moth to the flame. Everything about her is normal, which means she is forbidden to him, in all sense of the word. So why, then, does he always find himself at the front steps of her shop, breaking all his personal rules even if he wishes he could stay away?

A/N + Disclaimer: this is a side story to Black Daisies, my main mafia fic feat. 0T23. While the plot is based on the main story, this can also be read as a standalone fic. As usual, this is purely a work of fiction and in no way am I implying any member of NCT to behave the way I write them here. 

TW: crimes, heists, potential death, mentions of drugs and other illegal activities.

PAIRING: Jaemin x Reader 

CHAPTER 1 / CHAPTER 2 / CHAPTER 3 / 

FIC TRAILER

MASTERLIST

"Hi. Can I have one iced americano, no sugar, with an espresso shot, please?" 

 My hands froze and hovered momentarily on the drink I was preparing as I heard a male voice say that from the counter. I didn't turn around to check who it was, but my boss—who is currently helping me man the cafe today—was quick enough to dash the pit-pattering of my chest. He hooked the order slip on the board in front of me and my eyes immediately raised to read the name there. 

"One to-go, americano for Youngho." 

I sighed internally. Whether it be from relief or disappointment though, I don't really know. A part of me wanted to be in denial of my emotions, but I realized you can only go so far if the person you are trying to fool is just yourself. 

It's been almost three months since that night that I last saw Jaemin. I wish I didn't know the exact number of days that passed since then, but I do and I couldn't help it. Every little detail of what happened was still marked fresh in my mind, especially the feeling of hollowness that exploded in my chest when I woke up that morning to see them gone.

If not for the chip on the edge of the table left by Jeno as he tried to hold a half delirious Haechan down that night, I could have easily brushed off everything as a fleeting dream. But it isn't. It is a nightmare, at least in my part. 

He really meant it when he said he would leave me alone. 

There were no calls, no messages, no visits, nothing. It was like he didn't exist at all, the past year spent with him nothing but an imagined illusion. 

We were back to being strangers again, exactly like how he wants to. If you think about it, it's selfless of him to do this, but I hate it. I hate it with everything I have. 

Why? Because now I have to live through the feeling that I'm the only one suffering from all of that has happened. I couldn't watch the news anymore without thinking about him. For heaven's sake, I couldn't even get an iced coffee order without freezing like a statue because I remember him. I hate it. I hate every single moment without him, as much as I didn't want to admit it.

I placed the plastic cover over the finished drink with a soft sigh before turning to hand it over to the customer. At least I can still manage to put out my well-practiced, service smile. 

"Iced Americano for Youngho," I called out into the receiving area as I slipped a straw on the cup sleeve. A tall man looked up and walked over to me to receive it. 

"Thank you for coming to Brick and Beans. I hope you visit us again soon," I said in autopilot, my words so well-rehearsed that I didn't even have to think through while delivering them. The customer smiled at me before giving me a wink.

"I sure will. Thanks for this, sweet cheeks." He turned and left the shop, leaving me slightly confused. 

My attention was then called by my boss who had just finished wiping down the counter. The man—who really has been more of a father figure than an employer for me—gave me a warm smile and motioned me over. 

"Can we talk? I have something to tell you." 

I briefly glanced at the clock. It isn't my break time yet, but the store is empty so I guess it will be fine. I shrugged. 

"Sure."

"Grab a cake for you and me while you're at it," he nodded towards the pastry fridge before walking towards the nearest empty table. I wordlessly took two slices of basque cheesecake, his favorite, before following him. The man has a mean sweet tooth and we both know it.

He was silent for a little bit as he took the fork to take a bite of his treat. I waited patiently for him to speak, hands politely folded over my lap.

"I'm going to sell the cafe." 

I blinked and stared. I wasn't expecting that at all. 

"You're… what?" 

He sighed and leaned back against his seat. He looked a little sad over what he just said but he managed to offer me a small smile.

"I'm getting older. You know how much I love this place because I started it with my late wife, but I really can't continue to manage it anymore. My children, unfortunately, do not have any plans of continuing the business. And they've been asking me to retire, too." 

I nodded slowly, taking the news bit by bit. 

"Do you already have a buyer, ahjussi?" 

"I do. It is kind of strange, actually. Someone offered to buy off the franchise at such a perfect time. And for a very good price, too." 

That made me smile. I've had this job ever since I started college so it makes me a little sad that it's going to have a new owner, but I really am happy for him. I just hope whoever buys it off takes care of it really well. The old man loves this place to bits. 

I felt him take a hold of my hands from across the table. I looked up and was met with a fatherly smile. 

"Don't worry. You won't lose your job. The new owners said that they aren't planning to change anything here and I told them that they had to take you with them." 

That made me almost want to burst into tears. I squeezed his hand back in return. 

"Ahjussi... You didn't have to do that. I can always look for another job." Who am I kidding? I know it will be hard for me to land another sideline especially with all the financial hiccups I am already dealing with so this is really sending me over to the edge of tears. 

"Nonsense. You are part of this business. You've done so much for this place so you deserve this. Don't worry, they said yes to my condition." 

I gave his hands another squeeze and he answered back with a fatherly pat. 

"Thank you…" 

"You're welcome. Just promise me, when you become a doctor, you'll give me free checkups, okay?" 

"No, I won't. Because you will always be healthy and won't need my help at all," I said with a wrinkle of my nose. 

That sent the two of us laughing. 

"When will the new owners take over?"

"By the end of the month," my eyes rounded with surprise and he nodded in understanding. "I know, I know. It really happened too fast. I can't turn down the offer though. To be honest it was way beyond what the business is worth." 

I sighed. "Well… as long as you are sure about them." 

"I am. For now, I'll be here for a bit with you. I just need to enjoy my last days here. So just don't mind your old man, okay?" 

I grinned. 

"Only if you promise to give me a free cake every day you are here." 

He reached out to ruffle my hair. 

"Deal."

----

It was a slow day at the cafe so my boss decided to turn down the jazz music that usually floats from the speakers in lieu of the television volume. It was an odd hour in the afternoon and I found myself smiling as I watched him flip the channels over to look for a good show to watch while I dried some mugs. Just then, the overhead bell on the door dinged, welcoming with it a pair of uni-looking kids. 

My boss looked over, but I was quick to jump to action instead. "I'll take care of it," I mouthed to him, to which he gave me a smile before turning his attention back to what he was doing.

"Hi. Welcome to Brick and Beans. What can I offer you today?"

"We'll have one dirty chai latte and one irish coffee over ice. Make it to go. " 

The couple offered their names and I nodded as I punched their orders on my POS. "Would you like some pastries to go with that?"

"No, that's all."

"Got it, you can wait over there to the side. I'll have your drinks with you shortly," I said with a smile. The girl pulled the boy over into the receiving area to continue their conversation. 

"So what I'm saying is, we gotta go. Tonight is going to be epic. The bets will be high for sure. We can get some mean cash if we put it in the right car." 

The other gave a soft snort and started drumming his fingers against the wood of the counter. I let their conversation act as white noise while I worked behind the bar.

"I don't know. You're not even sure who is going to be there." 

"Jeno is in the line-up. That at least is confirmed."

I dropped the metal scooper I was using on the floor with a resounding clang. 

The three others in the room looked over to me as I hurriedly picked it up with shaking hands. I gave all parties a sheepish look before turning on my back to continue what I was doing. 

This time, I was full-on listening. 

"If Jeno's going to be there, then it is a goner. There's no chance for others. It'll be full-on suicide," the boy said thoughtfully. The girl, however, shrugged in reply. 

"They said the others might come, too. You know, to make the run a little bit more balanced," she offered. 

"You mean the seven?"

"The Four, at least."

"Oh shit."

"Uh-huh. So I'm telling you, we gotta be there man. If we can't bet then fine, but we have to see it. It’s been ages since they actually went on lane." 

I didn't really know how I managed to finish what I was doing, not with how hard my heart was beating in my chest. I'm not sure how many Jeno's there are in this part of town, but I am sure as hell that there is only one who is a member of a seven-piece 'group.' 

"Here's your order," I said thinly as I pushed the finished drinks over to them by the counter. The boy offered his card and I took it quickly, all the while thinking of what I should do next. The few seconds of me typing away at the terminal was the longest quarter minute of my life.

"Here's your receipt. Thank you for coming and see us again," I said, my voice a little weaker than usual. The couple gave a quick bow before turning to leave, drinks in hand. 

There are two ways this could go. I could let them out of that door and have my only possible chance of getting in contact with any of the boys leave with them. Or I could call after them and…

I whipped around to call out to my boss, my figure already halfway out from the bar. 

"Ahjussi, I'll be back in five minutes, sorry. I promise I'll be quick!"

He had barely looked up when I started running out the door.

-----

"Excuse me!" 

The duo looked back at me, then at each other in confusion as I tried my best to hurry up to them without landing on my face. God, why do they walk so fast? They were just a few seconds ahead when they left the shop! Thankfully, they stopped at my call, giving me a chance to skid before them as I tried to catch my breath.

"Um… Is there a problem? We paid, right?" The boy asked me with an odd look. I waved my hand before finally trying to answer. 

"Yes. I uh—"

Well, I obviously didn't plan this out clearly. How do I say this now without sounding like a lunatic? 

"I heard your conversation earlier. You were talking about Jeno."

The pair exchanged glances again, this time tinged with suspicion. It was the girl who answered this time. 

"Yes, we were. What about it?" 

"I… I just want—to maybe know where he is? You were talking about tonight's—"

"The drag race?"

I stopped for half a heartbeat before nodding. 

"Yeah. The race. I wanted to come, too, but I don't really know the address." 

The boy cocked his brow at me in blatant suspicion. It took all of me to pull out all the basics I learned from drama class back in high school to remain calm before his withering glare. 

"You know Jeno but don't know the address? That doesn't make any sense," he said as he crossed his arms over his chest. "If you've been in one before you should have been included in the text blast."

Oh shit. 

I could feel my palms growing cold from nervousness. Still, I tried pushing on. 

"W-well, I was invited before by one of them. But then things fell apart and I started not getting any of the...texts anymore," I said, not having the slightest idea of what I am saying myself. What's ironic though was that what I just blurted out was sort of a half-truth, too.

Apparently—and miraculously—it also made sense by the look of understanding that dawned on their faces. 

"I see…" the girl trailed off. She cleared her throat and looked at her friend before glancing at me again. 

"Look, I can give you the address, but promise me that you never got it from me when someone asks, okay?" She asked. The boy looked at her incredulously.

"Are you crazy? She was already shadow banned!"

She shushed him and waved her hand off to shut him up. "Look, this is a girl thing. Don't mess with it. Just go ahead to the car, I'll take care of it." 

He scoffed but stalked off towards the direction of the parking lot. 

She turned towards me again and pulled her phone from the pocket of her leather jacket. I watched as she unlocked the screen before showing it to me. 

"Do you have your phone with ya? Here, take a photo of this address." 

I swear I could almost kiss her. I scrambled to get my phone from my back pocket and didn't waste another second to take a snap of her screen.

"Thank you so much." 

She nodded in understanding before locking her phone again and shoving it into her pocket. "Hey, a girl's gotta stand up for another. Who was it? Was it Haechan?" 

"Um…" 

She didn't wait for me to finish. 

"Really, whoever it is among them, I can't really blame you. They're all cute, but they do need to be taken down a notch when it comes to girls. Those boys," she tsked. "Dangerous." 

Oh…

Oh. She thought I was an ex-fling who wanted to teach one of them a lesson by crashing the race. I let that sink in before a frown settled on my features. 

Well, aren't you one? The devil on my shoulder cackled at me sardonically. 

"Glad to have helped though. But remember, you didn't get it from me, okay?"

With a wink, she strutted off, leaving me staring at her retreating form. 

----

I told myself I simply wanted to see him again. 

I reminded myself that for the hundredth time tonight as I parked my car on a free space by a gravel road, my eyes roaming the darkness beyond. The place looked deserted, and I had to do one last check if I really put in the right coordinates on my map before finally turning off my engine. The road beyond was wide but uncemented and to its left is a half unfinished building with metal banisters reaching out to the sky like skeletal arms. I swallowed. Every little thing about the space beyond screams danger.

Which probably means I am in the right place. 

I reached out to zip up my jacket and pulled the hoodie over my head before getting out of my car. My sneakers crunched on the gravel as I made my way towards a low wall circling the building beyond. 

Just try and take a look. You don't have to talk to him. You can keep your distance. 

I repeated that in my head again and again as I approached what I assume to be the entrance. A part of me still wants to berate myself for doing this but I am too far gone to try and play the denial game again. I want, no, I need to see Jaemin's world.

The moment I passed through a crack on the wall, it felt like I stepped into a different world. It opened up into an even wider area, the shadows of a multi-lane road behind the abandoned building beyond. Milling around is a throng of people, some smoking, others sipping on red cups on their hands. Some cars were parked against the wall I just passed, their headlights on with music booming out of their rolled down windows. 

I tried to swallow the lump on my throat as I looked around. Already, I felt out of place in the crowd, but I steeled myself to push on, my hands digging deeper into the pockets of my jacket.

"Hey." 

I looked up to see a boy around my age wave at me. He was also holding a red cup and what looked like a bundle of paper. My eyes widened as that came into focus when he got closer. 

Money. 

Wads and wads of cash. 

"You put your bets already?" He asked as he stuffed the bills into a small belt bag hidden beneath his oversized shirt. He pulled his phone out then, unlocked the screen, and looked at me, waiting for an answer. 

"Uh…" 

He gave me an odd look.

"Who are you betting on?" He asked again. 

I gave the first name I could only think of. 

"Ja-Jaemin," I stuttered.

That earned me a low whistle from him as he typed away at his phone, probably to record my choice of 'player.' "I don't know, man. Dude seems pretty out of it lately, but whatever floats your boat." He stuck out his hand to me then, and it took me a few seconds to realize what he was asking for. 

"Oh," I scrambled to grab my purse. I was in the middle of pulling my card from my wallet when I saw his face. Slowly, I put it back to reach out for bills instead. 

"Cash only." 

I sheepishly handed him the last few hundreds I have. He took them, expertly flipping through each bill to count them off. 

"First time, eh?" 

I nodded. 

I watched as he slipped the money into his already overflowing belt bag, thinking that he would leave after that. Instead he nudged his head towards the direction of the building and motioned me along. 

"Come on then. At least try and get a good look at your first race." 

I blinked in confusion but ran after him as he started walking away. 

We stopped at the front row of the half ring of people that had already gathered in front of the abandoned rafters. Just then, a huge spotlight shone over the road behind it, driving everyone to erupt in cheers. Parked in a single line at the foot of the road are five cars, headlights opening one by one.

"Jaemin's the yellow one," the boy nodded towards the one occupying the third lane. I stared. I know next to nothing about cars, but I know enough to be sure that none of the ones in front of me now are something you can buy from your run-of-the-mill auto dealer. Lowered, with shining reams, and a low motor hum that reverberated to where I was standing, I could only briefly compute in my head how much each of those customized rides must have cost. 

I heard the boy beside me snort amusedly. "Your first race and you get to see this. I'm telling you, this happens once in a blue moon," he said with a smirk. I didn't say anything, my gaze never leaving the yellow car. 

Slowly though, I noticed the crowd's noise die down dramatically the same time that a petite form walked out from the building. The woman stopped in the middle of the road and raised her hand into the night sky, a small pistol in her grasp.

Everyone has gone so quiet now that you could almost hear a needle dropping. Just then, the resounding bang of a gunshot pierced the air. Few other large spotlights turned on simultaneously, revealing the snaking road ahead that was disguised under the darkness earlier. I gasped. The roaring sound of engines blared beyond and with a new uproar from the crowd, the cars were speeding ahead, leaving trails of light in their wake. 

My heart was beating so hard against my chest as I tried my best to follow the speeding cars ahead. I was only able to comprehend the real expanse of the road the moment each ride took over its lanes—the place looked more like an abandoned air dock field more than anything else. I was barely aware of my nails digging on the palms of my hands as my eyes switched from Jaemin’s car and the others, particularly on the deep red one that he was currently toe in toe with. The space between the two were a hair’s breadth away and I could almost swear their sides would collide any second. 

That went on until a curve on the road appeared. It was the last turn before the finish line and the crowd turned wilder as the nose of each car tried its best to take the lead. I didn’t even realize that I was holding my breath until the last second when the yellow one took over the inner space of the road before swerving successfully ahead.

Everyone around me erupted in cheers. I gave my own gasp, hands covering my lips before joining the rest.

Jaemin’s yellow lambo parked on the finish line, the rest of the race participants trailing behind. I watched as his door opened, revealing his beautiful wide grin and tousled hair. He was glowing, cheeks flushed from the adrenaline. I was so caught up in the image that I barely noticed Jeno appearing from the red car, followed by Renjun, Mark, and Haechan from the other rides. 

I couldn’t hear what they were saying, but I watched with a smile as they huddled over Jaemin, playfully pushing and cajoling him for his win. They looked happy, carefree.

But it seems like they aren’t the only ones who were out there in the road. My gaze moved back to Jaemin's car when I saw his passenger seat open. As if in slow motion, a girl got out of it, wearing the same wide smile the others have. The group hooted at her as she joined their huddle. 

That’s when I felt as if time has stopped.  

The smile on my face slowly faded as I watched Jaemin wrap his arms around her before pulling her into a tight hug. 

---

A/N: Hey guys! This is going to be the second to the last chapter of Jaemin’s side story! I originally wanted to finish it in one go, but I thought it would be nice to release the epilogue on Nana’s birthday! So yes, that’ll be out on the 13th, lol. Thank you so much to those who have continued reading this side fic! <3

Chapter 5 (END)

Taglist: @negincho​, @springdaybreaks​,