#these exiled years

[clatterbane]

I probably ought to go ahead and acquire some more grey market antihistamines off eBay. The stockpile is starting to run lowish, and you can't get anything but the 24-hour nondrowsy types here. Nothing fast acting for more acute allergic reactions and skin reactions.

Apparently there is one liquid form of diphenhydramine/Benadryl available by prescription here. Specified as salty licorice and anise flavored, and anise-flavored medicine has actually made me puke before. Also, good luck getting that prescribed, I'm guessing especially as an adult with "just" generally bitchy allergies to basically everything.

Also (in translation): Cases of abuse have been reported in connection with the use of the active substance diphenhydramin. The risk of addiction is greater in patients who have previously had drug abuse.

Which I have not notably--though very possibly by their standards, because I have tried me a few actually illicit drugs over the years! It just never stuck. But yeah, we're talking about liquid Benadryl. They acted goofy enough about the stuff in the UK, but it's all zero tolerance BS all the way down here. And Benadryl is apparently addictive now. Who knew?!

(Pretty sure I have heard of it sometimes getting used to cut heroin or something? That could apply to about anything, though.)

Yeah, eBay is looking damned good.

[pariahfox]

Finally going to try to embark on a new study plan, of slightly more structured DIY SFI.

The actual classes are free--but logistics, neurospiciness, and rolling burnout have been getting in the way of enrolling in any. Even what distance options I was finding for our area. But yeah, that is at least intended to help get immigrants up and at least semi-functional in daily Swedish ASAP.

As befits my nerdy, "unusual relationship to language in general" ass, I am currently all over the map in terms of skills here. Deciphering some written Icelandic and spotting German cognates, sure! Scanning "normal" written material, and at least getting the gist of maybe 50%-90% depending on subject matter? Usually yes, by this point. Formulate a halfway comprehensible e-mail with some vocabulary help from a dictionary? It'll take at least 3x longer than in English, but I can mostly manage. Just don't ask me to carry on a basic conversation, or do much more than (badly) order some coffee.

The osmosis approach really hasn't been helping so much with this. Neither has the fact that I haven't been able to get out and interact with people even anywhere near as much as my awkwardness could handle otherwise. Honestly haven't had the best luck trying to figure out how exactly to remedy any of this either.

So, my idea to get my ass in gear now is to pick up the appropriate textbooks (likely through less-than-official means) and follow along with at least one of the frequently recommended folks like Peter SFI covering this shit less officially online.

Also, suck it up and practice on the household captive native speaker more than I have been up to this point. If anybody is used to ridiculousness coming out of my mouth, it would be him. It just feels harder when it is someone that you do care what they think of you, who was also at near-native level in your primary language when you met them over 20 years ago. 😬

There are obviously the executive function pitfalls to keep in mind, but yeah. Trying to get more organized on my own is probably a better approach than doing much on a more formal basis. So, we'll have to see how putting an hour or two a day into this semi-structured approach might go.

My brain is pretty fried tonight, so I intend to start into that tomorrow. (Cue "Jane Says"... 🙄)

[senvurii]

oh bedrock bros. i wish you could come home

[indimiart]

thank you for reminding me what the sun feels like

They’ve both got a lot of years of missing sunlight. Lucky they get to relearn warmth again together🫶🏼

[boarloved-art]

Wei Wuxian should be able to get drunk for once. I think he'd either be singing bawdy drinking songs on the roof of the Jingshi or he'd be getting irrevocably lost no matter where he is. He's found in the bushes behind the mountains like a cryptid, and then he's like "I can't believe you all got lost" (extremely slurred) as if he didn't get embarrassed by something Lan Wangji had said and just somehow disappeared when everyone looked back at him

oh ABSOLUTELY im walking with u and nodding and agreeing, i can see him becoming an absolute menace to keep track of at his drunkest.

anyway heres wonderwall The Gang (Wangxian & their fave group of ducklings) in a city known for its STRONG wine and wuxian being like well. ur all grown now, youre technically not juniors anymore. we have to see whos lasting the longest against this stuff!, smash cut to a suspiciously wei ying-less group of the worlds drunkest cultivators being wrangled through the woods by designated driver hanguang-jun, with at least 2 of them clinging to his robes at all times.

[mayexiled]

"Bring down the blade with the strength to shatter fate."

[boneshine]

Brush my hair

Read my lines

It’s time to go

Wear my suit

Put the make up on

Put on a show

Up, up, up, to the Heaviside layer

Up, up, up, I'm going straight up

Take my lunch Lose my lunch It's a shaky start

I'm old Deut

Now he's old Deut

I've lost the part

Down, down, down, to the center of the Earth

Down, down, down, I'm going straight down

[theokapuco]

A broken hero

[thegreatyin]

when the interactive fiction has an option you can't select as part of the narrative >>>

[exile-arc]

ON EXILE AND LOSING YOURSELF.

Sources: ship of theseus, britannica / @.thunderbottle / rat a tat, fall out boy / silhouettes, shadows and reflections, mission vista / i don't know, ghost quartet / window of awareness, holly warburton / exile vilify, the national / @.waddei / rat a tat, fall out boy / event horizon, wiktor jackowski / tommyinnit tvtropes page

[neloangelo0]

....happy jostiversary @exilethegame (I'm a month late)

[clatterbane]

One good thing that came out of today's early morning trip out for more bullshit bloodwork: I found some promising-looking vegetables, which are pretty exotic by local standards but remind me of home! One of the benefits of living in an immigrant-heavy neighborhood. (Doesn't really matter where from IME, just as long as it's got longer warmer growing seasons there.) Hasty lap shot of today's haul when I was about to head home.

Much better view after getting home! Some nice young examples of one common Middle Eastern variety of summer squash, along with some okra. Which was borderline overgrown by my standards, but it didn't feel like it was going all tough and dried out yet--and it's the nicest fresh okra my admittedly near-hermit ass has spotted in years.

On the way home this morning, I got Mr. C to drop me at the nearby shopping center, so I could pick up an Instabox package (shoes) and enjoy the weather and a little exercise while "strolling" the rest of the way.

It was still early enough that at least half the businesses weren't even open yet, but that also meant that things were enough less busy that I felt like I could get in more easily for a better look at a couple of stores I'd wanted to check out more. One of them a halal butcher shop with attached fruit and vegetable shop just across from there, obviously run by the same people. Both are usually mobbed enough that I haven't felt like shoving myself in--especially with the chair.

The butcher side was still not looking so accessible, even with only a couple of other customers in there, plus a few workers finishing getting things set up for the day. I also figured that I didn't really need to go on an early-morning meat buying spree in hot weather--much less when my backpack was already completely full of shoebox, and carrying capacity was already pretty limited. So, no meat for me.

The other side did, however, lure me over with some gorgeous plums. Which sadly turned out to still be so hard that I noped away from those. Yes, I am that produce prodder, and I can be particular. Was hoping they would have some nice leafy greens out front today, but no such luck.

But, then I did spot the okra and then the squash.

I didn't grab much today, since I am the only one in the house who really likes either thing. Plus the okra was running the equivalent of US$7.69/kg, or roughly $3.50/lb. 😓 Squash was $2.90/ or $1.30/lb by comparison. I got away at about $2.50 for both of them together, which really wasn't at all bad by local standards. I am also cheap as hell sometimes and also still mentally comparing with prices on locally grown squash and okra in a much more rural area 15-20 years ago when I was last buying anything back home.

I am also now lowkey pining for some Floyd County peaches, and J. Random Farmer's cantaloupes that he's selling off his truck by the road. Then there's the fresh just-picked regional variety corn. 🙄

If that okra is any good and I see more there in nearly as good a shape, I may have to pick up enough more to try pickling a few jars of it. That's one thing that I do miss sometimes, and I don't really want to try with the frozen stuff--which is usually better for cooking than what I see fresh anymore.

The produce side also carries a bunch of dried fruits and nuts, and some other loose bulk goods including some interesting-looking Afghan brown sugar in like fist-sized chunks which I'd never seen before, but made me think of panela or jaggery. May need to try me some of that.

Also looks like the place to go if you want a sack of pumpkin seeds or similar at reasonable prices! Today I did not, and also did not particularly want to carry that home in my lap because that would have been the only place for it.

Their produce is all out front, but I did go ahead and bull my way back through the rest of the store to get a good look at the dry goods. Needed to shove a couple of obstructions out of the way in the narrow aisles, but I was the only customer in there at that point and idgaf. It was well worth a look around. May need to go back another morning after a few things that looked good.

There is also a spice shop a couple of doors down, which always smells heavenly to go past but is usually so packed that even Mr. C hesitates to peruse it on foot. There were few enough people in there too that I had to roll through and case the joint. Did look and smell like some quality stuff at decent prices. Also some pretty good looking bulk bin dried fruits and nuts and other snack items, and some assorted Middle Eastern sweets. I didn't buy anything there either today, but will probably need to make a morning raid on that too before too long.

But yeah, the day was not all bad. I also got to see a delightful young Boxer out for a walk on the way home.

[littlerune]

i hate the "banish the wardens from orlais" option because it's like.... by what authority?? i get it, the inquisition is framing itself to be a powerhouse but i feel like they still don't have the ability to banish people from a kingdom they don't rule lmao

[bijoumikhawal]

hello! i hope it's alright to ask you this but i was wondering if you have any recommendations for books to read or media in general about the history of judaism and jewish communities in egypt, particularly in ottoman and modern egypt?

have a nice day!

it's fine to ask me this! Unfortunately I have to preface this with a disclaimer that a lot of books on Egyptian Jewish history have a Zionist bias. There are antizionist Egyptian Jews, and at the very least ones who have enough national pride that AFAIK they do not publicly hold Zionist beliefs, like those who spoke in the documentary the Jews of Egypt (avaliable on YouTube for free with English subtitles). Others have an anti Egyptian bias- there is a geopolitical tension with Egypt from Antiquity that unfortunately some Jewish people have carried through history even when it was completely irrelevant, so in trying to research interactions between "ancient" Egyptian Jews and Native Egyptians (from the Ptolemaic era into the proto-Coptic and fully Coptic eras) I've unfortunately come across stuff that for me, as an Egyptian, reads like anti miscegenationist ideology, and it is difficult to tell whether this is a view of history being pushed on the past or not. The phrase "Erev Rav" (meaning mixed multitude), which in part refers to Egyptians who left Egypt with Moses and converted to Judaism, is even used as an insult by some.

Since I mentioned that documentary, I'll start by going over more modern sources. Mapping Jewish San Francisco has a playlist of videos of interviews with Egyptian Jews, including both Karaites and Rabbinic Jews iirc (I reblogged some of these awhile ago in my "actually Egyptian tag" tag). This book, the Dispersion of Egyptian Jewry, is avaliable for free online, it promises to be a more indepth look at Egyptian Jews in the lead up to modern explusion. I have only read a few sections of it, so I cannot give a full judgment on it. There's this video I watched about preserving Karaite historical sites in Egypt that I remember being interesting. "On the Mediterranian and the Nile edited by Harvey E. Goldman and Matthis Lehmann" is a collection of memiors iirc, as is "the Man in the Sharkskin Suit" (which I've started but not completed), both moreso from a Rabbinic perspective. Karaites also have a few websites discussing themselves in their terms, such as this one.

For the pre-modern but post-Islamic era, the Cairo Geniza is a great resource but in my opinion as a hobby researcher, hard to navigate. It is a large cache of documents from a Cairo synagogue mostly from around the Fatimid era. A significant portion of it is digitized and they occasionally crowd source translation help on their Twitter, and a lot of books and papers use it as a primary source. "The Jews in Medieval Egypt, edited by: Miriam Frenkel" is one in my to read pile. "Benjamin H. Hary - Multiglossia in Judeio-Arabic. With an Edition, Translation, and Grammatical Study of the Cairene Purim Scroll" is a paper I've read discussing the Jewish record of the events commemorated by the Cairo Purim, I got it off either Anna's Archive or libgen. "Mamluks of Jewish Origin in the Mamluk Sultanate by Koby Yosef" is a paper in my to read pile. "Jewish pietism of the Sufi type A particular trend of mysticisme in Medieval Egypt by Mireille Loubet" and "Paul B Fenton- Judaism and Sufism" both discuss the medieval Egyptian Jewish pietist movement.

For "ancient" Egyptian Jews, I find the first chapter of "The Story of the Jews: Finding the Words 1000 BC-1492 AD” by Simon Schama, which covers Elephantine, very interesting (it also flies in the face of claims that Jews did not marry Native Egyptians, though it is from centuries before the era researchers often cover). If you'd like to read don't click this link to a Google doc, that would be VERY naughty. There's very little on the Therapeutae, but for the paper theorizing they may have been influenced by Buddhism (possibly making them an example of Judeo-Buddhist syncretism) look here (their Wikipedia page also has some sources that could be interesting but are not specifically about them). "Taylor, Joan E. - Jewish women philosophers of first-century Alexandria: Philo’s Therapeutae reconsidered" is also a to read.

I haven't found much on the temple of Onias/Tell el Yahudia/Leontopolis in depth, but I have the paper "Meron M. Piotrkowski - Priests in Exile: The History of the Temple of Onias and Its Community in the Hellenistic Period" in my to be read pile (which I got off Anna's Archive). I also have some supplemental info from a lecture I attended that I'm willing to privately share.

I also have a document compiling links about the Exodus of Jews from Egypt in the modern era, but I'm cautious about sharing it now because I made it in high school and I've realized it needs better fact checking, because it had some misinfo in it from Zionist publications (specifically about the names of Nazis who fled to Egypt- that did happen, but a bunch of names I saw reported had no evidence of that being the case, and one name was the name of a murdered resistance fighter???)

[ranticore]

sorry if u already posted this. but is there a side by side comparison of cuinn/ice storm over kosa before and after becoming a king? im interested in how that process would change a harpy

yes there is!! it's old but shows it off well i think

here's cuinn with his old king thunder strike, when cuinn was a tiercel

the main changes are 1. size, a king is about 1.5 - 2x the size of a regular harpy, this is true for all types, 2. beak - it gets bigger and turns the face less human, 3. streamer feathers grow longer and more pronounced, this is what makes up their mane.

i did once write up a timeline of changes but i don't remember exactly how long it takes. it's definitely more rapid than you'd think, a couple of months. the most noticeable feature (i.e the beak) develops last, because if your established kings see you turning into one they'll treat you as a potential threat. so the winning strategy is to keep it under wraps for as long as possible before very quickly (one month ish) changing and immediately challenging an established king. it is at this stage that most new kings die.

before that final big change the regular cob or pen seems to have an increased appetite and more prolific feathering, but that can be excused by other factors and isn't necessarily a kingification warning sign until they start getting bigger

[ilkkawhat]

I know I've mentioned the Journal before, but this Saturday marks the one year anniversary of the day that I decided to play Alan Wake 2 for the first time, and my life changed for the better. I've used this journal to keep track of various gameplay stats (not pictured is the AW2 page where I'm literally keeping a tally of how many times I've played it which I'm in my tenth full playthrough); notes such as the stash puzzles, deer heads, etc though I still gotta finish the list of nursery rhymes and maps beyond cauldron lake; dreams I've had involving alan or anything remedy related; doodles and drawings (which is huge for me on a personal level cause I have this like. slightly traumatic experience with drawing early in my life that I won't go into detail here); and even a few poems I wrote...and I hadn't written poems since maybe high school.

This year has been rough on a personal level especially with work but like other cornerstone obsession's I've had, Alan's journey resonated with me on so many levels and gives me strength to keep going. The night I bought and played AW2 on a whim just because I saw a meme that "friendship ended with Silent Hill now Alan Wake 2 is my best friend" will go down as a tremendous turning point in my life. I was on a creative dry spell, I had stopped everything and never thought I'd start again, I had exiled myself from any sort of fandom space/interaction thinking I was poison, isolated myself to such a terrible degree from my family and friends, I was in such a deep depression and a new level of hopelessness than I had ever been in before, and I can just go on and on forever on how much this game means to me but the most important thing Alan Wake taught me is the beginning of the final draft, that realization that all is not lost, that my life is not just a loop of depression then fleeting joy then depression then fleeting joy then depression then fleeting joy (yes, sometimes I wonder if I'm bipolar) and his monologue sums it up best:

A fictional poet once said "Beyond the shadow you settle for, there is a miracle, illuminated." I will not settle for a shadow. I will find the miracle, through the night. It's not just victims and monsters; I see now, there are heroes as well. We can find our way through the darkness. We will break through the surface and crash into the light.