#these are just 10 of the funnier ones i decided to screenshot | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

myfriendsarerealidiots · 4 years

Text

Comparing Adaptations

‘Kay so I went on one of my whims again and did something stupid. Couple weeks or so ago, I wasn’t really in the mood to watch anime so I opened up Netflix and watched a Cdrama that I wanted to watch for a while now.

That Cdrama was ‘The Untamed’ which, prior to me watching it and doing said whim, I thought was just your typical historic Cdrama. Oh boy I was wrong. As I was watching it, I was thinking to myself, “This show’s really selling itself off as BL.” Which, I found out after finishing it was because it is BL. Hah...and that was just the start of it.

As I was doing my ‘Post-show research,’ I found out that it was based of a novel, called ‘Mo Dao Zu Shi’or as translated by the people on the internet as ‘Grandmaster of Demonic Cultivation.’ Said novel had 2 more adaptations along with ‘The Untamed’ which were a manhua and a donghua. So me being me, I decided to watch the donghua adaptation and read both the og novel and manhua.

So how I went through this was...

The Untamed (2019)

The Donghua aka Anime I guess

The Manhua which I read while having class (such a responsible student aren’t I)

The original novel

All hail this person who has too much free time on her hands.

Anyways, as it says on the tin, I’ll be comparing the 4 adaptations/versions of the story and see what changes between them as well as the pros and cons. (Wow I sound so professional)

Some background of myself just to avoid confusion

I am not a mega hardcore Fujoshi. I don’t really enjoy reading smut, nor am I old enough to do so bear that in mind

I have 7 years worth of Chinese lessons under my belt which means I barely understand a thing and that I can get some of the jokes like how Wei Ying’s sword is called ‘Sui Bien’ and it’s funnier to hear in Chinese. In other words, compared to like actual Chinese people who live in China, I pretty much have the knowledge of a 10 year old.

The versions of the Manhua and Novel that I read were translated in English so somethings might have been lost in translation.

I have a bit of a goldfish brain so forgive me if I wrote something wrong or forgot the name of a certain character, most likely I will look it up to correct it but if I don’t...well sorry.

I am writing my opinions on each version as I finish them, so if they don’t link up to the original that’s the reasoning behind it.

All of these are my opinions and thoughts on the story. You are not entitled to follow them if you disagree. I personally believe that everyone has a voice of their own and they should use it. (Even though I don’t half of the time.)

Slight Spoiler Warning

I will be breaking down some of the scenes and characters for my comparisons so please keep that in mind.

The Untamed (2019)

As this was my first exposure to the story, I didn’t know what to expect. I loved everything about it except for the fact that literally half of the show was spent in the past, building context for what was happening in the present.

The characters were lovable and all had distict personalities, especially Wei Ying and Lan Zhan which I guess makes sense since they’re the main characters (their actors are also cute and have good chemistry.) Speaking of characters, Yanli has a more forward role in the story here compared to the other versions. The way certain characters were introduced was different too. Since it’s live action, it’s also harder to show things like extreme blushing and such so it makes Lan Zhan look very stoic and way more unexpressive here than in the other versions.

The soundtrack is nice to listen to, especially with the 2 mains singing the theme song together it’s so cute and gives it another meaning in itself. Although, I do wonder how that poor bamboo flute Wei Ying made in like 2 mins plays decent sounding music. Chen Qing(is this the name of it?), the flute he uses after his trip to the Burial Grounds has the same sound quality as that bamboo flute which is just, “how???”

They took out most of the extreme BL!!! I feel like that is the biggest difference between this version and all the rest. I know they did that to appeal to more people but it does remove some of the context to things. That doesn’t mean the moments that were kept in weren’t cute though. It did make the pair look more plantonic than romantic.

As for the story itself, as a story on its own, it’s nice, as an adaptation that’s where the line gets blurry but it leans more towards the good side. They did indeed change some things, made them work better with the medium than if they didn’t.

An example I can place is the mask. Where the other versions used white make up with oddly placed red circles around the eyes, this one used a mask instead. I agree with the choice they made, seeing as they removed the fact that Mo Xuanyu was homosexual and so the make up wouldn’t make sense. It also looks nicer than what I imagined what could’ve happened with they kept with the make up. They do make a reference to this in the show when Jin Ling and Wei Ying have a conversation in Carp Tower. “You’ve seen my face right?” “How do I know? Your face is always caked in make up or covered by that mask.”

Another issue I had which I’ll touch on later was the first episode—I had no idea what was going on for those 40 minutes of screentime.

Donghua

As of writing this post, season 3 of this has yet to come out.

My first reaction to this was “Man, the animation’s pretty, and they made Wei Ying look scarier.” Watching stuff at 12 in the morning isn’t the best thing but that’s what I do.

Anywho, this version made Wei Ying really attracted to going down the path of ‘evil’ compared to the other versions. I don’t really understand why they made this change...but they did so we have to deal with that. And his eyes glow red!! It makes him look scary and cool at the same time. I love it!!

The transitions between certain events were a bit weird to say the least. For example, at the end of episode 2/3 Wei Ying gets forcibly dragged into the Cloud Recesses and the episode ends there. By the next episode, we’re 16/23/13 however many years in the past. This makes it really confusing for someone who hasn’t watched or read any other version of the story. It definitely made me confused and I already finished one.

While ‘The Untamed’ told us everything in one long flashback, the donghua broke it up into small chunks placed whenever information was needed. I don’t think that was a good idea, but then I also think it was a better decision than what they did for the Cdrama. As I watched this adaptation, I found myself confused from time to time because what happened in the prior episode didn’t always match what happened in the current episode like I mentioned earlier.

As for the artstyle, personally, I think some of the characters look similar minus the hair. However, I do like the little ways they made Lan Zhan express his feelings towards Wei Ying.

Speaking of which, when I first saw them together in this version in the forest near the Goddess Temple, I had to do a bit of a double take because of the height difference which wasn’t so evident in ‘The Untamed’. I soon found out that Lan Zhan was taller than Wei Ying before and after he gets reincarnated(?) Prior, it was just a small gap of 2cm which later turned to 6cm after possessing Mo Xuanyu.

I didn’t notice their height gaps while watching ‘The Untamed’ because Wei Ying’s actor, Xiao Zhan, is taller than Lan Zhan’s actor, Wang Yi Bo by about 2 inches which is like 5 cm? and so they had to do some weird thing with platforms to make Xiao Zhan look shorter in comparison.

Soundtrack wise, I personally think that ‘The Untamed’ was better in that sense. Where it had an amazing souding flute, this one had minor earrape in a nutshell.

This version made itself, in my eyes look more like a historical fighting anime as opposed to the BL vibes I was getting from ‘The Untamed’ and the other versions. They added a lot of action scenes and made the mystery more interesting for me. Along with this, the overall look and feel of this made it seem like it came from a completely different source material.

Manhua

Small FYI, as of writing this post the Manhua is at 147 Chapters.

(I should’ve kept up the trend and got a screenshot from that scene in the Manhua but I didn’t so here we are with gay rabbits.)

As your local internet friend who reads more manga than normal books nowadays, I enjoyed reading the manhua and finished it in a couple days.

Compared to the first 2 versions here, these last 2 are both things that you have to read to get through, albeit one has pictures and one doesn’t.

While normally, one would read silently, I like listening to music while I do. And seeing as the OST of ‘The Untamed’ sounds really nice, I listened to it while reading both the manhua and novel when I could.

This one brought out the BL elements that were missing from the first 2. They gave Wei Ying and Lan Zhan a lot of kissing or just straight up affectionate scenes which I think ties in with the general theming of the original novel more.

As this one is probably the closest of the adaptations to the original, it’s the least confusing to read, although that might’ve been influenced by my experiencing the story for the third time at this point. I say that, however, there were many story elements that weren’t present in either one prior to this.

Examples this can be seen with their collecting of body parts that belonged to the former Nie Sect Leader. In ‘The Untamed’ they find the sword spirit which guides them through the rest of the story. In the Donghua adaptation, they get the arm, but also get the head of the the Jin with the hundred holes curse which was an original addition. Here, they get the arm from Mo Manor, find the other one then find the torso and so on before finding the head in Jin GuangYao’s possession.

The flashbacks in this version were also executed really well, in my opinion, as it doesn’t feel super confusing while reading it and it gives just enough information to help the events unfold. It also gives us a chance to see how much of an ass(sorry) Wei Ying was when he was the Yiling Patriach from his own perspective as well as give us a moment of WangXian in the middle of all that chaos.

Novel

Here’s a picture of gay rabbits for everyone.

At this point, I was switching between the novel and the Manhua to read whichever one I wanted at any given time which might have blurred my sense of what belonged in each one so I’ll try my best to make sure.

Since this one is the original source material, it was clear from the get go that this will be the one with the least confusing version of events and the most amount of detail.

I was surprised on how close the manhua and ‘The Untamed’ was to the novel. Although, the former condensed the mystery to fit within the timeframe while the latter hasn’t finished just yet.

Personally, I like this author, and will probably read more of her works further down the line. Even though the version I read was in english, I still could feel the meaning behind certain aspects which I think shows her skill as an author.

The novel clearly shows the mischief that goes through Wei Ying’s head and their gradual (I say gradual but I think Lan Zhan just snapped) change of attitudes towards each other.

Arc One- Mo Manor

Past here I’ll break down the first arc of each one because I think all of them did it in relatively different ways. Be warned for spoilers if you haven’t watched or read all of them.

The Untamed (2019)

Out of all of these versions, this one definitely had me scratching my head in confusion the most even after watching it a second time once I finished the entire show.

As the only version that had the curse issued at the start as a moving factor of the story as well as the Yin Iron which was specifically made for this version, it didn’t explain enough at the start.

There were many things I could say were wrong about this beginning, from starting at a flashback to not properly introducing us to our characters but the biggest problem in my mind was the lack of explanation at the present.

Like I mentioned, starting at a flashback is a terrible idea as it gives the viewer high expectations only for it to be crushed the second it ends. Here, it shows a small portion of the battle at the Nightless City without much context then it quickly changes to 16 years later with a seemingly random group of people.

Another issue is the amount of useless characters who were introduced. In the other versions, there were only 2 Lan disciples who were given names and were introduced properly while here there were more than I want to count. Add to that the one telling stories about the YiLing Patriarch and the weird guy walking around with a flag, and you got yourself total confusion.

Donghua

This one was slightly less confusing to watch. As it starts with a clip of Wei Ying commanding corpses which matches the overall feel of the donghua. The rumors that he died stretched over the time skip and we meet this version of Mo Xuanyu who is caked with make up, whether or not he was a cut-sleeve (gay) in this version, I forgot.

It fully explains the curse and instead of having a couple of Lan disciples just standing there watching, we get to focus on the 2 important ones, Lan Sizhui and Lan JiYing. It gives us a slightly deeper insight into Wei Ying’s mind, as he states ‘you got the wrong one,’ just after being reincarnated, indicating that he isn’t as vicious as painted by the first few minutes of the show. Like the other versions, they also show how he considers the cons of using his demonic abilities and that Sizhui would probably tell on him to Lan Zhan, meaning that Sizhui was a keen, observant young man.

Manhua and the Novel

As for the introductions, these two were very similar. Both have the rumors of the Yiling Patriarch across the screen as we get further down the story and meet our main character.

It gets the details from the Donghua adaptation and mixes it with more information to create a more detailed account of what was happening, also making this Wei Ying seem smarter compared to his counterparts in other versions. He also hesitates more on showing his abilities, knowing that he’s going to be caught if he does.

Final Thoughts

As of writing this, I’m only halfway through the novel but it covers the portion until where the manhua is currently at. I would finish reading it before posting this but it would take too long and probably make this post even longer than it currently is, which isn’t such a good idea. If I had much more patience and effort I would really like to break down each arc and their differences from one another but I can’t be bothered right now. (Sorry)

I can safely say that in terms of adaptations, ‘The Untamed’ is relatively close to the novel, albeit a very condensed version. As flashback filled as it is, it wasn’t very confusing to watch past the first two episodes.

The Donghua adaptation takes several liberties, going more of an action oriented route instead of the calmer more, I wouldn’t say love but character oriented novel.

The manhua is definitely the closest to the novel, so if you really don’t want to read a lot of words, and I mean a lot of words, then go ahead and read it.

What else do I have to say...if you’re new to the story, welcome, if you’re a veteran who’s been here longer than me, sorry for taking up space on your feed. And congrats for making it to the end.

#the untamed #mo dao zu shi #manhua #donghua #cdrama #wei wuxian #lan wangji #wei ying #lan zhan #fujoshi #comparisons #mdzs #wangxian #yiling patriarch #yiling lao zu #hanguang jun

48 notes · View notes

carlatsukinamistolemyhamsandwich · 5 years

Note

Facial expression ask from the ask game, I‘m too dumb and lazy to search for the emoji😂

That’s understandable lol, thanks for the ask!

✿ Which boy makes the funniest facial expression?

I had to think about this one but ultimately I decided to go with Kino for this expression:

The other boys have surprised expressions but Kino’s is just the peak of “Oh shit” and I find it hilarious (also having Carla glaring at him in the background of this screenshot makes it 10 times funnier).

#reply

7 notes · View notes

minervamagicka · 6 years

Text

CC Creator Question Tag

I was on a CC bender and saw the talented @murfeelee doing this, and of course, I think it’s bloody fantastic, so here are my answers. It was actually pretty fun to do, all things considered.

Under a read-me so I don’t bomb some dashboards with long paragraphs.

1. What was the hardest project you’ve worked on so far?

Honestly, the Wrench CC I released a while back. This was mainly because no pre-ripped models from Watch_Dogs 2 exist, which meant I had to export models from my own copy of the game. Now, normally, this isn’t an awful fate or particularly hard for me to have to do, but for the love of God, Ubisoft makes it HARD to sift through their game files. That was probably the hardest part of making that set, mainly because I couldn’t find the poor guy’s textures and spent way too long having to blindly search through W_D2′s files.

2. How long have you been creating cc?

Eh, I don’t know, 2016? 2015? I did private recolours and such earlier but I really got into the heavy stuff when The Witcher 3 came out and I wanted to start converting clothing, which is how my earlier abominations came about when I started heavily experimenting with meshes and rigging. I’ve done stuff in Garry’s Mod previously -- Damn it, Valve, I want to learn how to rig for Source but it’s TOO HARD -- involving .obj files and the like so I had some prior knowledge of modelling programs, but little knowledge of how to apply it to the Sims 3. A lot of my education was trial and error.

3. What’s your most favourite thing you’ve created?

GARRUS.

Call me the staples button because that was easy to determine. I don’t even know why I decided to start working on that project, I think it was a mix of fascination and hard-on for Mass Effect at the time, and also to see if it was possible with how I understood the Sims 3′s functions. And, well, it was! It was also so different than other CC I had seen coming out, and involved a beloved character... Perfect storm for me to be proud.

4. What’s your most hated thing you’ve created?

As cliche as it sounds, I really don’t like the job I did on Triss’ outfit from the Witcher 3, which was my first piece of CC on this Tumblr. I am 100% going to go back and re-do that (And more) just to make up for how trash I think I handled that outfit, to bring it up to my current standard of quality. In fact, I might start on that now.

5. What inspires you to create?

Honestly? Lack of what I wanted. Unless I’ve received a request for something, 100% of the time, when I release something, it’s because I wanted it in my game. Also that I want my fandom OCs to be dressed properly in clothes from their universes, damn it.

6. What gets you unmotivated to do anything or to delete your project?

When I hit a roadblock I can’t overcome no matter what I try. I generally have ‘systems’ I can run myself through when making CC, especially conversions -- ‘Oh, that doesn’t work? Cool, I’ll just try this..’. -- But when that fails too that’s when I’m like ‘Welp, time for a work-around to the work-around!’ and by that, I usually mean finding an alternative means of getting the effect I want.

7. What’s one thing you wish you knew how to do/do better?

Making actual sims. Most of the time I’m pretty insecure/worried about how my Sims stack up to others, and tend to overcompensate for that by decking them out in custom CC that makes them speshul.

8. How long does it usually take you to make something?

That sort of depends. If I want it, and I want it now? I can have an outfit in-game in 3 or so hours, and that’s working nonstop on it. That doesn’t necessarily guarantee it being perfect the first time around, but I’ve streamlined my outfit conversion process down to the point it takes me no time at all.

9. Is there a certain schedule you stick to when publishing?

Seeing as this blog was literally dead for half a year because I didn’t want to put anything out... No, not really. Whenever it’s done.

10. Your favorite programs to work with?

I would be lost without Blender. Seriously. Without Blender I’d be screwed. Milkshape and Photoshop take a close second as I use all three at once in my creation process.

11. Who do you look up to (creator wise)?

@kurasoberina was always an inspiration, but I think a lot of people can say that :^)

12. How many projects do you have at the moment?

Good joke, kid. Uhhhh. Currently, I would classify my crusade to convert Assassin’s Creed: Syndicate objects and clothing to be my project, and there are various subprojects under that -- Assassin attire, Victorian-era attire/props & then the attire and props from the hidden WW1 segment of the game. Right now, focused more on the Assassin attire and the WW1 objects because that’s where my OC is, lmao.

13. Screenshot your wips folder (if you have one)

Take me out to dinner, first.

Yes, the New Folder thing is real. Yes, I actually use that as an organizational system. Yes, it works for me. It’s best not to ask how or why. The name of my WIP folder is funnier, tbh.

14. Do you plan on creating for a long time or is there a certain period you know you’ll stop?

I don’t see myself stopping until it becomes completely unviable to do, I.E. TS3 becomes too outdated or something. Maybe my public releases will slow down -- Hell, they already have, but I still want nice clothes in my game.

15. What helps you keep focus during your creating process?

I have Spotify character playlists that I listen to when I’m doing conversions for a particular character -- I.E. I listened to Ayessa’s playlist whilst doing her outfit. Or I throw on Netflix. Actually, weird as it sounds, when I really want to focus I put an episode of Ghost Adventures on, because watching 3 surfer dudes yell at the Devil is surprisingly helpful.

Not sure how many CC creators follow me, but I’d love to see any of you guys give this a try too. Could be fun.

#simblr #question tag #cc creator

7 notes · View notes

ak-fantasies · 7 years

Text

Tonight

EXO Baekhyun

Pairing: Baekhyun x Reader

Genre: Angst (?)

Song of Inspiration: Winner - Tonight

(This is in Baekhyun’s POV)

A/N: If you all would like me to write this in the reader’s POV, let me know. I had just finished my finals so I’m using some free time to write some one-shots here and there.

I sit up on my bed, looking at the person next to me. I bit my lips, feeling my heart drop. I looked at her face but all I can see is _________. I inhale before sighing. I could feel a sharp pain on my heart. All I could do was look at the girl next to me currently and imagine _________. Recently I’ve been thinking about _________. I remember when I used to like this current girl and was sick of __________.

“Baekhyun!” I heard _________’s voice, making me rolled my eyes. I was tired and honestly was sick of _________ always nagging at me.

“Hi _________..” I looked at her and gave a small fake smile. __________ and I have been dating for about 2 years but recently she’s been really annoying. I also met with my friends the other night and he introduced me to a few of his friends. I managed to convince __________ to let me go since it was a friend that I haven’t seen in a long time. There I met another girl, Minhye, and we instantly hit it off. We got each other’s contact and from then I’ve been texting her non-stop, without _________’s knowledge of course. She trusts me and doesn’t need to know about me texting her.

“What’s wrong?” She asked and I shook my head. I felt a vibrate and turned on my phone. It was the other girl. I quickly unlocked my phone and texted her back.

“Who are you texting?” She asked and I shrugged putting my phone in my pocket.

“Just my friend,” I replied, I’m not technically lying.

“Who?” ___________ asked, annoying me a bit.

“Taeyeon.,” I said, lying this time. __________ knew that Taeyeon and I were friends so I hoped that she wouldn’t ask more questions. I wasn’t in the mood to answer any more questions. I had just finished a mid-term and just wanted to relax.

“What are you two talking about?” She gave me a small smile and I just rolled my eyes.

“Homework.” I gave a quick reply. __________ quietly nods her head and was in a cheery mood. I sighed and we both walked home together. She softly took a hold of my hand which I pulled away.

“We in public. Remember what I said?” I looked at her and she pouts. She sighs nodding her head.

“I know.. But I barely get to hold your hands anymore.” __________ said. I had entered a university away from my hometown, __________ being only a year younger had stayed behind. We kept our relationship long distance before she had moved to the same college as me to be with me. My parents didn’t accept our relationship though, so we decided to keep it a secret. I didn’t want any of my friends to find out because I had wanted to stay in a relationship with _________ and I was afraid that they would tell my family. We stopped showing skinship in public.

“Well, you know we can’t..” I said, sighing. She sighed.

“ I know… I know.”

I just shook my head, annoyed and sick with being with her. __________ was annoying and I just didn’t want to deal with it.

Later that night

I had been texting Minhye and I started to really like her. Well, I could tell she really likes me. She invited me to go shopping with her family and since there was a break coming I decided to go. We even Skyped and her personality was cute. It was different from when I’m with __________. I used to think that __________ had a funny, cute personality but I don’t really see it that way. She just became so annoying and honestly, I really think Minhye was funnier and cuter. I screenshot our Skype call and it captured Minhye’s smile so beautifully.

The next morning I had been half awake and sort of out of it. My mother had called me and I let it slipped about me and __________. My mother was furious but she told me that she wanted me to talk to this other girl that is the daughter of her friend. My friend was rich so because ___________ wasn’t in the upper class, my family didn’t like her. I sighed, I mean I did feel sad because I really do love __________ even if she had gotten annoying. Plus it’s not like I would’ve gotten with Minhye because I care for __________ and don’t want to hurt her. I had to tell _________ later that day and she put up a smile and said that she would be okay. I trusted that she will, she was strong.

The next day I went with Minhye and her family to the shopping plaza. I figured that __________ worked, so I didn’t text her at all. I muted her messages and had my time. I had found out that Minhye was the girl that my mother wanted to talk to. I got to hold her hand that day and posted it on my snapchat. I didn’t get home until 10 almost 11 and that's when I decided to text ___________. She should understand that things were going to be different and I had talked to her. ___________ and I had boring conversations and that was fine for us but not things are different. I had been texting Minhye for about 2 weeks non-stop and I could tell she liked me. I found out that she had a boyfriend for 1 year and had recently just broken up with him. She told me that she had lost feelings for him a few months ago. I haven’t made things cleared about me and ____________’s relationship. We haven’t broken up yet, so we were considered a couple.

I saw __________ less than usual and spent most of my time with Minhye. But __________ had texted me today asking to talk. I figure it was time for us to really talk and be clear about where we are at.

Tonight I had a lot on my mind. I realized that I never really knew how hurt _________ was and I don’t know if I would ever really know. __________ had always smiled around everyone, always hiding her vulnerability. Though there are times where she would just cry to me and I don’t like it when she cries. I don’t know how to comfort her but I try my best. It hurts me to see __________ cry. She had cried when I told her that my mother wanted me to talk to Minhye, she cried when she wanted to be cleared with our standing in the relationship but in the end, she would tell me that she was okay. I started to doubt her but I also knew that she would be. We agreed to be close friends like brothers and sister. She had still cared for me and I still cared for her. Though I am unsure if it’s out of guilt or out of my love for her. I looked at Minhye, who is by side. I don’t like this feeling tonight. I thought it was easy since I had started developing feelings for Minhye but now I feel like crying. Right now Minhye looks just like ___________. Tonight, I felt lonely when I held Minhye I longed for _________. A sad night tonight and __________ won’t ever come back tonight.

The next morning I went to her apartment, knocking. I wanted to know that memories of me didn’t die. I wanted to see her again. I knocked again, no answer.

“__________… It’s Baekhyun... Please answer. Are you there? Give me an answer.” I said, continuously knocking. No answer. All I want is an answer. I miss her. The ache in my heart misses our conversation, our memories, our love, everything we had. I missed how annoying she would be to me. I miss her and I want to see her. But it’s not going to bring her back. ___________ isn’t coming back anymore.

I met up with Minhye after she had finished her classes. I looked into her eyes, but all I could think about was ___________.

#exo #exom #exok #exo k #exo m #exo l #weareone #baekhyun #byun baekhyun #exo baekhyun #exo imagines #exo imagine #baekhyun imagine #ak-fantasies imagines gallery #kpop scenarios

41 notes · View notes

chromemuffin · 7 years

Photo

Quan Zhi Gao Shou / The King’s Avatar Manhua (Chapters 6-10)

Onto the next five chapters! Thank you to everyone who read my weird ramblings in the first part!

There will probably be some overlap between this liveblog and my liveblog of the novel, but I’ll try to minimize it.

Chapter 6: Thief Shouting Thief

How nice of you to offer to help dry clean his coat, Chen Guo!

xD Ye Xiu’s “Oh...” reaction.

Ah, so he actually said this through audio. I couldn’t tell when I read this part in the novel. That makes it funnier, him saying it with that flat expression. And Sleeping Moon’s “Hello my ASS” comment haha.

Decided to live up to that ‘shameless’ label, I see. The funny thing about this being in-game is that you can have that comedic moment of Sleeping Moon pointing up at the banner and have it not be a sort of fourth wall thing you’re supposed to ignore for the sake of the story. Like, the notification can actually be on screen here.

Did you not learn your lesson, like you really think you can screw him over, haha.

The names aren’t as fun this time around, though: Drifting Water, Sunset Clouds, Seven Fields. I think these guys have more experience than the previous party though, so perhaps that is meant to reflect that.

lol this time, no one is fooled. I love the chibis. Everyone’s expressions are really great throughout this thing, actually.

Actually it’d be better to say: use him for hard labor, then kick him out.

I LOVE THE HONESTY. AND THE IRONY.

You actually made your in-game avatar yawn. I know it’s a first person game and this is technically just an expression of the characters in real life for the benefit of the readers, but.

There was no way to represent the hilarity of these panels without screenshotting them all. Their progression through the cave, each expression changing with each panel, the little “being careful” vs. “vigorous strides”. I love how they’re so on edge, and Ye Xiu is looking bored. And Sleeping Moon looks like a scary imp.

I need to make icons of all the funny expressions made in this manhua or something.

lol after their wild theorizing on how he could be that good or pull off those combos, they then go “you know what, we shouldn’t piss this guy off” to being in awe of his skill.

Chapter 7: A Showdown in Spider Cave

T-the little chibi characters trying to climb up giant Lord Grim...it’s so cute.

LITTLE MOON MOON. I actually remember this from the animation, but it’s still hilarious.

AH. It’s Blue Brook Guild’s arrival on scene...They’re half the reason I got so confused with all the names in the first place. Their names all follow a theme and they’re too similar urgh. Ok. I’ll get it straight this time.

Pretty boy here is Blue River, yes?

Lol, DRAMATIC FIRST KILL CLAIMING SHOT--

Oh, never mind someone beat you to it!

lol someone who’s not freaking out about it right this moment. I liked Blue River in the animation, he was a fun character.

Chapter 8: Seizing first kill by ten seconds’ lead

They needed 11 ellipses for the silence that befell them after they were done killing the boss.

And back with the ragtag team with Lord Grim...they’re singing his praises up the wall.

Poor Little Moon Moon. Why do I keep screencapping him? His super dejected expressions are gold, that’s why.

He’s a far cry from his confident, smug first appearance:

remember when he had some class?? xD

Ah, I remember when everyone started calling him Little Moon Moon too xD I love how no one even listens when he threatens them to stop calling him that.

We’re all adults here. Don’t be childish. It’s just a game. Don’t let this upset you.

words of wisdom to live by. too bad a lot of people are so horrible at this irl.

Blue River’s manhua version is so pretty...I have a weakness for bishounen characters, ok. Even if he’s currently just a character in a game and I don’t know what his real life character looks like.

OH GOD. it’s the nice ones that snap first.

I wish they would decide whether they want to censor curse words or not...I’m not going crazy, am I? It was spelled out some chapters ago.

CHEN GUO. “You don’t want to live anymore!?” She went to sleep, got up in the morning when it’s nice and sunny, and he’s still playing...Furthermore, he’s teamed up with the guy who trash talked him and everyone is willingly giving up drops to him. No wonder she’s bewildered.

I mean, it’s stopped absolutely no one before, but yes he has a point.

“You not only transformed your foes, you made them your followers as well!?”

The madness and shenanigans of the 10th server are just beginning.

What a handsome Ye Xiu. You do not look like you pulled an all-nighter. You should be dead on your feet.

But aww, Chen Guo fixed up the spare room for him. She did feel bad about it earlier, I remember from the novel.

Uh, is he taking his shirt off to sleep in the middle of winter...? he didn’t bring a change of clothes or anything either.

Chapter 9: I was exiled to to the Qin Mountains in the autumn wind

What’s with the chapter title this time around? I think I’m missing so many references here.

The press conference and announcement of Ye Qiu’s retirement was a strong moment in the animation, and it’s presented nicely here as well. The look on Ye Xiu’s face is particularly painful, as he stands alone in the back of the room essentially watching the last 7 years of his life summed up on screen.

As well as Chen Guo being absolutely devastated that her idol retired. Haha, he’s still coming out right and telling her his identity, but she doesn’t believe him.

The irony in asking if he wants tissues to cry over Ye Qiu’s retirement, and he says “Why would I? How could I ever cry?” when he really has the most cause to cry out of anyone at that moment.

For someone who was never into publicity and stuff, he has a suuper charismatic smile apparently. Look at that thing.

omg yeah I remember now, Sleeping Moon being a fan of Ye Qiu and depressed that he retired. Must be so awkward for Ye Xiu.

Speaking of awkward, he feels awkward having to keep relying on the others, in his words ‘free labor’ lol. I don’t think his feelings were so clear in the animation.

Wow, these skeletons are well-drawn. And wonderfully gross.

Chapter 10: At the blue bridge, you returned to Changan with the spring snow

Had to take this page directly, I wanted to get a better look at all the character designs. Aaah, I really love the designs. All the little details~

Ooh, so this is where the manhua works in its explanation of the weapon types. Nice little graphics to go with it too.

Was this the best image to pick to go along with the idea of ‘professional research facility to create silver weapons’...?

So Blue River is Blue Bridge Spring Snow, but in the 10th server. Thaaat’s not confusing at all. (his name is a reference to the chapter title which is a line from a poem, right?)

T-the Cleric’s name is Bound Boat...

I didn’t recognize her at first either. HAHA Ye Xiu was also surprised.

I do like Chen Guo’s explanation why she doesn’t think Ye Qiu should retire, she’s quite perceptive and analytical. Even though this is her idol, she sees that his performance hasn’t been good and that was probably why Excellent Era used him as a scapegoat over the years (apparently more than once).

Once again, the designs are so nice. And we get a little sneak peek of the real people behind the characters.

lol Ye Xiu not listening to Chen Guo at all. SHE WAS ONTO SOMETHING, TOO.

“But that machine’s the server!” “I’m the boss.” hehe Chen Guo is too much.

“I forgot to read the guide.”

oh no. so much for mr. textbook player.

← back・onward →

#quan zhi gao shou #king's avatar blogging #qzgs manhua blogging

8 notes · View notes

fly-pow-bye · 7 years

Text

Powerpuff Girls 2016 - “I’ll Be Bake” & “Blissfully Unaware”

No, I wasn't unaware of these. Part 1 of 2 of the four shorts they put up alongside Power of Four!

I’ll Be Bake

Wow, that is a lazy pun. Such laziness is not unfitting for this short, really.

As the title implies, this episode is all about baking. It would be a good break from the norm if the Reboot Puffs doing normal things in this reboot wasn't the norm. I'd be fine with this if it was doing the norm in a superhero way, but it's not going to be very apparent in this short.

The short starts with Blossom preparing to bake a cake. Bubbles and Buttercup show up, holding vases. They argue over which vase is more priceless, and immediately break them as soon as they see Blossom. Already, this short establishes that Bubbles and Buttercup are going to be on the insufferable end of their new personalities.

Bubbles and Buttercup beg Blossom to have them help her bake that cake, which she allows, but only if Bubbles and Buttercup are filling to follow the steps precisely. There is a potential for comedy there, though it never really pays off.

We also learn that she's making it for Student Council, in that wording. This is the only line in the short that raises any sense of urgency, but it does raise a question: didn't she forfeit the Student Council in Presidential Punchout? Maybe she could have meant making the cake for the Student Council, possibly to appease them to give up one of their seats, or maybe this is something the writers didn't think about. I'm going with the latter.

As predictable as it is, the rest of the episode is essentially just a bunch of scenes where Blossom tries to tell them something to do, and Bubblescup ruins it somehow. I say "Bubblescup", but one thing I can give this short over Bubbles Beauty Blog (But On Video) is that they try to give them things to mess up the cake in ways that fit their character.

For example, when asked for milk, Bubbles persumably steals a cow. She did have that habit of bringing random animals to the Powerpuff household in Helter Shelter, but I think it's more of an "oh, that silly Bubbles" joke. There's also Buttercup using tons of mixers with the butter, leading to a shot of a window getting covered in butter. Like blood! That's the closest this short gets to a joke I can recognize. Oh, and she says this before she does it:

Buttercup: Hasta la vista, budda.

Oh, so that's why it's called I'll Be Bake! It has a random Terminator reference! After Bubbles and Buttercup decide to play with the icers instead of using it to ice the cake, she's had it. What is she going to do? Is she going to inspire them to use their creativity in a good way? Is the cake just going to be ruined?

No, she just ties them up with duct tape, and finishes the cake herself. At least duct tape a step up from ordinary rope and rubber bands. What lesson did we really learn here? Don't let incompetent people work on anything?

This is pretty much that Bubbles Beauty Blog short, but with cooking instead of fashion, and it's Blossom being tormented instead of Bubbles. I don't look back at that episode too fondly, either. Other than some cutesy scenes that are somewhat relatable, as hard as calling anything in this reboot cute can be, this short just felt pointless in the end.

Blissfully Unaware

Oh yeah, I’m unaware of any bliss when it comes to this show, but that's not the bliss they're talking about.

But first, this short starts with an overly muscled chef named Chef Mussel. He's all about flexing his muscles, and adding a pinch of salt. For a show about little girls that can do feats of strength despite looking like cutesy little girls, they sure like muscle-related humor. At least there's some humor in the contrast.

If you haven’t guessed, this short involves everyone’s favorite character, Bliss. Just assume this happened between Bliss appearing and Bliss moving Saturn all by herself by just how amazingly not powerful she is. It really does sound like an exaggeration, but that’s actually what happens. Bliss can move entire planets, while the Powerpuff Girls you all know and love can be stopped by duct tape!

We get to know one more thing about Bliss the special didn't get into: she likes pizza. She asks the Professor if he's making pizza, and he says she's close.

The Professor is actually making something called Broccoli A La Grossier, which is filled with all the things that make 6-year-olds, and apparently 16-year-olds, squirm: broccoli, brussel sprouts, and parsnip sprouts! You know it's gross when they have to use actual photographs!

Bubbles: That’s more sprouts than I can count with my fingers!

I hope the joke is that she can only count to zero. Bliss isn't a big fan of the brocolli-based dish, either. I guess she was on an island for 10 years, so I should cut her some slack on never learning to eat her greens, or beat them for that matter. So she decides to do a plan.

While the last short was about throwing a bunch of jokes and hoping one of them sticks, this one focuses on one joke, for the short's benefit. She telekinetically moves all of the healthy food away. That sitcom dad ends up being blissfully unaware that his replacements aren't necessarily healthy. I can't say the title doesn't fit!

Bliss and the girls, their involvement is so little in this short that they might as well have a "and the rest" credit, remain smiling throughout this, acting like innocent little angels. That screenshot looks really important for some reason!

We get a montage of Bliss magically swapping the ingredients, and the chef saying things that remind me of the "Stir, Whip, Stir" scene from the Star Wars Holiday Special. PPG 2016 reminding me of great things, let me tell you. At least it's slightly funnier due to how over the top the chef is, though that's not a high bar to clear.

...the Rude Broccoli is finished, which looks suspiciously like a deep dish meat lover's pizza. Of course, the Professor looks at this, and, in a shocking twist, he doesn’t notice a thing even after staring at it. On one hand, he did say pizza was close to what he was going to make. He's happy to see the girls happy, and he promises that he'll make broccoli every night, causing them to gag. Maybe even the girls knew Bliss was temporary.

I found this better than I'll Be Bake, even if most of it is on a technicality. At least it involves a superheroine using superpowers, something that was extremely rare in the last short. I would complain about the Professor being the oblivious sitcom dad rather than the genius he should be, but that's sadly consistent with his character in the reboot.

I probably could have done all four shorts in one go, but then I’d have nothing for next Saturday. Also, I needed the break so I could use more time to study for my midterms. See you next week!

← Power of Four (Parts 3-5) ☆ Bedtime & Mojo Jojo Builds A Shelf (shorts) →

#fpb reviews #fpb ppg 2016 #ppg 2016 #powerpuff girls #cartoon network

6 notes · View notes

cupcakeshakesnake · 7 years

Text

Watching The Return of Doctor Mysterio for the first time

Ayyyy long title.

-SERIES 10!!! SERIES 10 IS HERE!!!!!!!

-SDALDFHGALSDHFGAS,LDHFASLDFGASLDFHASLDJFGASLDHFALS

-LASGFLERN283WQUR’QSEI;RWQER;WIERXIUI;I::weif:weif:eifE;IQUGWIF

-*cough* okay... Let’s watch this

-(I just realized the episode I’m watching is flipped horizontally because of copyrights or something, so the screenshots are gonna be flipped too because I’m too lazy to edit them)

-Ah, this takes place in the U.S.

-WUT

-What’s swinging outside his window

-DOCTOR WHAT ARE YOU DOING

-Well this is a dangerous situation for him, I doubt that even Timelords can regenerate if they fell from the sixtieth floor, there would be no piece of body big enough to regenerate from

-Pardon me if I’m wrong on that though, I’m not the best at Doctor Who science

-His voice what happened to his voice

-WELL OF COURSE CLARK KENT IS SUPERMAN DOCTOR PLEASE KEEP UP WITH AT LEAST SOME OF THE MEDIA

-Well this is a weird start to an episode

-”Vomiting, hair loss and death, fat lot of use.”

-What is that those

-”How did you even get a glass of water in your pocket?” “Skills.”

-I’m calling it, his pockets are bigger on the inside.

-All this fucking Christmas shit again

-Annnd I’m dead

-But seriously, I grew up in an un-religious household in Asia and Christmas was just this little holiday with trees and presents and--

-GEMSTONES THEY’RE TALKING ABOUT GEMSTONEs I should shut up

- --Anyway it was this little holiday with trees and presents and department store sales--

- -- HOLY SHIT DID HE EAT IT

-"What are you, 36?” “Eight.”

- --AHEM anyway yeah, that little holiday, and--

-HE’S FLOATING??!?! WHO THIS? WHAT?

- -- UGHHH anyway, yeah. I grew up with that and then there’s this Western Christmas culture where it’s such a big thing and it’s, just, really, strange. Initially that little rant was gonna be a bit longer and better articulated, but interesting things kept happening in the show.

-”YOU’RE A SUPERHEROOOOOOO”

-IS THAT NARDOLE

-Okay what is happening and what is wrong with these people

-BRAINS WTF

-Why do science fiction lights always turn on so loudly

-”Donated to the facility by our benefactors” “DONATED” yeah. Looks like he murdered those benefactors after all.

-What’s the Doctor even eating

10/10 face

-What’s with the guy coughing blue milk

-WHAT

-For some reason I am inclined to pet this brain creature (pf which, by the way, I failed to upload a screenshot because everything else would be uploaded except that image, even with the quality lowered), but because there are many hideous monsters in Doctor Who that are not to be judged by their appearance, I’ll keep a neutral opinion on this guy until further progress in the plot is made to prove either its hostility or its friendliness.

-Yep, I’m not petting you, brain dude. You’re not friendly. You get no pet.

-”I had a change of mind” WAS THE JOKE REALLY NECESSARY

-And were those surgeons just standing there doing nothing 24/7 until someone came in

-WELL THIS IS TERRIFYING ALRIGHT

-Who’s the writer again... *takes a look* Yep, Steven Moffat.

-”No one will believe that, this is America.”

-”Special Agent Dam Dangerous Schgsfilurfylas” My English hearing’s not the best, okay

-Dude’s hand is shaking, that yells terrible aim

-”o on, tell them you shot us in the back for self-defense.”

-Heyoooo, it’s the boy with the glasses, except he’s not wearing glasses anymore and I’m NOT talking about Harry Potter.

-God damn I wish someone would turn down that guy’s accent, it’s like he has a swollen tongue and is trying to decide whether to spit out or chew a hot piece of bacon

-Where did Nardole even come from

-Heyooo

-WHY DID THAT KID GROW UP TO SOUND LIKE EVERY PARODY OF BATMAN’S VOICE EVER

-Flashback?

-So is he gonna sh-t out the gemstone or

-nevermind what I just said

-HE GREW UP WITH A THESAURUS AS WELL APPARENTLY

Pffft

-what’s with the wind noises

The Doctor with a baby is the best thing ever, it doesn’t even matter which reincarnation he’s in

-BUT WHAT’S WITH THE WIND NOISES

-Nardole with that elephant lol

-Wait... Isn’t that the reporter girl?

-WHAT IS WITH THE FRICKING WIND

-ACTUALLY I JUST REALIZED THAT THIS WIND SOUND SPANS ACROSS THE ENTIRETY OF THE EPISODE, IT’S NOT THE EPISODE ITSELF IT’S THE GUY WHO UPLOADED IT

-OR SOMETHING

-GOD I WAS FREAKING OUT ABOUT THIS STUPID THING

-IT HURTS MY EARS

-I’M WEARING HEADPHONES AND THIS WIND NOISE IS TORTURE

-X-ray vision would actually be great because everyone would be spooky scary skeles

A HA HA HA HA HA

-Did the Doctor just drink alcohol from that bottle

-Yep, he’s getting wasted

-*unholy squealawking* ”This is Mr Huffle. Mr Huffle feels pain. Meet me in the kitchen.” what the fuck was that

-I DON’T LIKE THIS WOMAN NOR THAT LITTLE RUBBER DOLL

-I DON’T LIKE YOU AT ALL

-I HOPE YOUR LITTLE MR HUFFLE DRAGS YOU DOWN INTO HIS SPECIAL HELL WITH YOU

-You can just see how those soulless eyes of his are begging for the sweet release of death

Wake me up (wake me up inside) Can’t wake up (wake me up inside) save me

-He is screaming, free me, free me, free me from this pain

-look here lady you are clearly very clever and all but you better close your bedroom doors securely at night and make sure that lil guy is outside or you might never wake up one day

-Change of subject: I thought this guy would be the one called Dr Mysterio but instead it turns out he’s called the Ghost. Not this Ghost either.

(Image from Star Wars Rebels)

-The deathly stare of Mr Huffle is refusing to leave my mind, help, what do I do, I have been cursed

RUN DOCTOR RUN, HE BLAMES YOU AS WELL AS HER

DOCTOR: THE HORROR GAME Do not let him look into your eyes!

-IT’S THOSE OPEN BRAIN MEN FROM HUSBANDS OF RIVER SONG, THEY’RE BACK AT IT WTF

-”Good to keep an open mind, ha!”

“I am totally against bantering.”-

-Ah, back when his floof was still flat, calm and level one.

-Woohoo speech

-WAIT WHAT THE TARDIS SHOWS UP AT WHISTLES TOO

-Oh, so that’s why that guy’s wearing jewels in the trailer, I tought he was always like that.

-And apparently the Doctor got him out of the robot king to keep him as a companion.

-”I’m not avoiding anything, I’m just trying to save a planet.” “Which is what you always do when the conversation turns serious.”

-”Hello Doctor nice suit” “Hi” “Good morning” “Whatever” “So uh.. what happened to Clara” “WHOOPS GOTTA GO SAVE A PLANET BYE”

-Bet that guy wanted to rip his shirt open to reveal the supersuit inside for years

-Why are they suddenly in Japan

-”I flooded downstairs with Pokemon.” 1. I laughed at that bit in the trailer, but it’s somehow even funnier considering they’re in Japan. 2. BBC doesn’t even care about copyrights anymore. In fact, they haven’t careed for quite a while. 3. favorite scene in the episode so far.

-FUCKING TEA

-WELL IF THIS ISN’T BRITAIN

-Oh yeah, brilliant plan, have the creepy stare-y surgeons march along down the street in a line, no one will ever notice

-An ambulance? Okay, less stupid plan

-Random question: Why are those guys’ heads split diagonally and not vertically or horizontally? It gets on my nerves. Besides, what if one of them is left handed?

-That mask reveal took a turn, and uh but uh “Grant, the man I took for granted” SHE’S MAKING PUNS EVEN WHILE GRIEVING

-That’s awkward

-”What do the rich old men always do when the fighting starts? They’ll find the safest place to hide themselves away and send all the young people to die.” I feel bad that this is too true to be taken lightly.

-”Oh, there’s the smile, I don’t like the smile!”

-”You’re completely out of your mind!” “How is that news to anyone?” I love the dialogue in this episode

-WOOHOO

-”He’s actually left handed” So I was right, crackheads can’t be left handed?

-GRANT, THE BOMB

-Welp

giving up on life like

The Doctor’s having none of your shit

sarcasm.jpg

-WHOA BITCH THAT HEAD IS BLANK

-”Put in a call to Osgood.” Nice reference.

-WHOOPS THAT SOLDIER

-”I’ve been away for a while but I’m back” Also nice reference to the previous episode (that I CRIED ABOUT)

-DAMMIT STOP TORMENTING MR HUFFLE IF YOU WISH TO AVOID A PAINFUL DEATH

-OH GOD NO

SHE’S PASSING THE CURSE TO THE DOCTOR

-HE MUST BE SAVED

-REBLOG TO PASS THE CURSE TO SOMEONE ELSE OR WHATEVER

-#SAVETHEDOCTOR2017

-OH DEAR GOD THE CURSE IS WITH HIM, NONONONONO DOCTOR DON’T TAKE IT WITH YOU SHE’S TRYING TO DEFLECT ITS RAGE TOWARDS YOU

The... shirt... That’s a first.

-Oh jeebuz crisxenz now Mr Huffle is in the Tardis and he will bring bad luck to us all and he will be the reason we will be crying in any future episode ever and he will cause Twelve’s regeneration mark my words

-Dear Lord protect us

-Oh wait Moffat’s not gonna protect us is he

-We’re screwed

#watching for the first time #reaction #review #long post #whovian #twelfth doctor #peter capaldi #doctor who #the return of doctor mysterio #nardole #dw series 10 #soulless eyes #dead inside #mr huffle #is cursed #save him

5 notes · View notes

topicprinter · 4 years

Link

Yesterday I made a post here, and even though the comments and reception were overwhelmingly positive, the mods decided to remove it. I tried to get in touch to ask why and didn't get a reply, but I assume it's because I linked to my Medium blog post. (IMO that's quite stupid. If a link doesn't add value the post will be downvoted, I don't see a reason for the mods to act as if the sub members are children, but fair enough - not my sub, not my rules.)So, because I don't care about the Medium traffic that much and because my main goal was to share my personal experience with likeminded people, I'll post again today with the whole gargantuan text copied here.(I'll still give the original link at the very bottom because the sub doesn't allow pics in the text post, and I specifically made comic strips to make the post easier to read and hopefully funnier (and there are a couple of screenshots). Feel free to ignore it.)- - -5 Lessons from 2 Failed Startups7years ago, on my last year in university, I unwittingly embarked on a startup journey. Here are the five most important lessons that I picked up the hard way.(comic 1)The main reason I wrote this piece is so that I don’t repeat the mistakes I list below, but I’m publishing it in hopes that my experience will have a positive externality — that someone out there will internalize these lessons without paying the cost of money, time, and tears.FIRST STARTUP What it was: the first premium educational platform for a popular competitive video game (Dota 2); My role: main content guy — I wrote most of the content and worked directly with our influencer partners, but with time got more and more involved; Timeline: created platform and developed content; launched successfully and found decent traction; slowly faded into obscurity due to lack of sufficient funding; LESSON 1: Be prepared for different levels of successNaturally, when we started the project we had great expectations for its future financial performance. We also kept in mind that it could crash and burn, as we knew most innovative products fail.The two options in our heads were either:great success — the business supports itself just fine and growsor total failure — we close down and search for “real” jobs.What we failed to anticipate is the vast land in between those two extremes. That’s where we ended up. When we launched we started making enough money to indicate we are onto something, but not enough to fully support and grow the business.(comic 2)When you hear something along the line of “90% of startups fail”, you imagine that 10% of startups hit the jackpot while the other 90% lose their money and close their doors instantly. However, this statement lacks a time dimension and a grayscale between the whiteness of success and the blackness of failure. It could be useful to investors, but it is misleading if you are a founder.I’m sure some startups lose their money very fast and are left with no choice but to close operations. Yet, I’d wager a big chunk of the unsuccessful 90% spend a long time trying to navigate mixed signals from the market. The problem is that in such conditions decision-making is not straightforward. Are you wasting your time, or are you on the brink of something worthwhile? Not an easy call to make.When faced with such decisions, pessimists quit too early, while optimists tend to believe success is just behind the corner perpetually. Both mindsets are wrong.If you quit too early, you are cutting short the chances that you’ll hit a lucky breakthrough.But if you fight for too long, it could get you stuck in a terrible limbo people in the startup community call “the land of the living dead”. You make ends meet, barely, but in reality, you are just wasting your time, potential, and testing the patience of all the people with a stake in your success or failure (people in both your personal and professional life). A business is, generally speaking, not a worthy cause for martyrdom.In our case, we ended up in the second option. We had over-promised so our investors and business partners were unhappy with the performance, yet we were not ready to give up yet because we still saw a lot of potential.At the same time, without the full support of the inventors and partners, we had no chances to succeed. We spend over a year in this state. You need to be realistic about these things, and in startups, the business of selling dreams, this is harder than it sounds.Plan for success, plan for failure, plan for everything in between.Retrospectively, what we had was a successful proof of concept which required further funding to grow and become a real business. Our failure to anticipate this outcome meant that neither we nor our partners or investors were prepared, which spelled the slow and agonizing death of the project.If you’re a founder, you need to be granular in defining success and failure. You need to have a timeline everyone agrees upon (not only the founders but all stakeholders) and a definition of different levels of success so that nobody quits too early or leads a lost war for too long.For example: Great outcome: X months after launch, we’re making enough money to support the business. We agree to reinvest and grow it slowly to avoid dilution (lifestyle business route) or to fundraise to grow fast and search for an exit (startup route). Good outcome: X months after launch, we’re making money, but not enough to support the business. This is expected — proof of concept. We’re in the process of fundraising. If we succeed to fundraise until month Y (money runs out) — great. If not — we close the business. Bad outcome: X months after launch we’re making very little (if any) money. We pivot if we still have resources, if not — we close the business. LESSON 2: Find a mentorThe three main components people talk about when evaluating startups are usually the team, the product, and the market.It’s hard to argue if any of the three is more important than the others. Usually, you need all three to be good enough to reach success.In our case, we were lucky enough to have a favorable market — demand for what we were offering and lack of any real competition.The product was so-so: it could have been much, much better considering our lack of experience & resources, but it was good enough to attract the early adopters and with time it could have evolved.The team, however, had 0 experience.We did this straight out of university (I worked on the project part-time until I finished my masters). The founder was the technical guy and he was a junior developer at best. I was the content marketing guy and even though I had some marketing courses in uni (which mostly focus on traditional, big businesses), I had 0 real-world experience.Our lack of technical/marketing experience proved not to be fatal — we were learning on the go and managed to push out a working product and to reach our customers. We had vision, passion, some domain knowledge, and the willingness to work hard.What was fatal, however, was that we had 0 experience running a business. Honestly, we had close to no knowledge about startups and what to expect of these kinds of projects. Doing the actual work takes thousands of hours, and the minutes spent making a bad decision can easily invalidate all your efforts.If present-day-me could advise and mentor this startup, I’m certain it would have become a successful business.(comic 3)If you are a young entrepreneur, you need a mentor. An official one, with a small share in the business in order to have skin in the game. Ideally — an entrepreneur who has some startup experience behind his back or at least someone who has been deeply involved in such businesses. Turn to your local startup community and it won’t be that hard finding someone interested: after all, most people like giving advice as well as getting free shares in companies.[If you don’t have an official mentor, at least make sure you’re getting mentorship from other places intimately familiar with your business (investors, startup groups or communities, etc.).]Embarking on your first startup journey without a mentor is like trying to become an MBA star without ever having a basketball coach. Unless you are incredibly lucky, you will simply fail. You’ll make fatal mistakes like the one above (and many more I can list, but it would take forever). Frankly, even nowadays, being much more experienced, I doubt I’ll ever work on anything innovative without a mentor.SECOND STARTUP What it is was: a monetization platform for video game influencers and content creators in the same niche My role in it: founder Timeline: fundraised (a bit more ambitiously this time, $90k); created platform and developed content; launched and found 0 traction; turned the website into a profitable gaming blog for a year; tried to pivot in the meantime, unsuccessfully; LESSON 3: Market expertise doesn’t trump startup common senseAs you’ve probably noticed, startup one and startup two are connected. What happened is that the founder of startup one finally had enough and bailed. I still had a chip on my shoulder, however, and managed to convince one of the old investors (and a few new ones) that there is merit in having another go at the market with a new (more ambitious) concept. Naturally, things didn’t turn out as planned.“Fail fast, fail cheap, and leave yourself time to pivot.”That’s probably the most frequently repeated startup advice. And probably the most valuable one you can get. The one that you need tattooed on your forehead if you’re a founder.So, even though I was aware that the biggest startup mistake is to spend all your resources developing something no one needs, I made exactly that mistake. Like many a startup, I burned through 90% of our bank to acquire the validated learning that there’s no demand for the product we’re making.What led me astray was the belief that I was an expert on this particular market niche and knew intimately its needs.(comic 4)The confidence I had, obviously, was false.What’s true is that the previous startup validated that the market actually exists, which is a good start.What’s not true is that the previous startup validated in any meaningful way the new product we’re developing. We had a new concept, a new marketing approach, etc. Equally importantly, the market had changed since the first project — competition was starting to pop up, etc. I was probably one of a handful of people on the planet intimately familiar with this small market niche, and yet my ideas weren’t bulletproof anyway.After we launched and saw 0 traction, I tried to pivot with a new idea based on the market feedback. The problem was that I had to validate it on my own with no budget and no team. I couldn’t do it properly, and I still don’t know to this day if this idea would have worked out if I had more resources to test it.Looking back, if I had focused on being an expert on running a startup as much as I did on being an expert on the market, things could have turned out quite differently. I could have tested the waters for plan A with 20% of the budget. That would have left me with enough resources to try out at least three more different approaches. We were working from Eastern Europe (Sofia, Bulgaria) and mainly with freelancers, which meant that our burn rate was quite low.Failing fast and cheap would have made the company four or five times more likely to succeed. I suspect that this number is even higher because the accumulated expertise by smashing your head into the wall (market) repeatedly means that plan B is usually better than plan A, plan C would probably be better than plan B, and so on.Every startup needs to be lean (test your assumptions with minimal resource investment) and agile (be ready to continually change your concept/priorities base on market feedback). This is simply not negotiable if you want to succeed no matter how much of an expert you believe yourself to be.“Startups almost never get it right the first time. Much more commonly you launch something, and no one cares. Don’t assume when this happens that you’ve failed. That’s normal for startups. But don’t sit around doing nothing. Iterate.” — Paul GrahamLESSON 4: Don’t regret correct decisions that didn’t turn out your wayAfter launching and finding 0 traction with almost no money left in the bank the realization where things are headed hit me hard. I wasn’t ready for a second failure just yet, however, so I poured all my efforts into finding a source of income for the business to give us some breathing room.Content marketing was my biggest strength, so I made a content strategy and started churning out articles. I managed to grow the traffic of the website significantly (reached 240k unique monthly visitors at its peak), and at the same time, I was doing cold outreach to any viable business that might want to advertise with us long-term.(Google Analytics Screenshot)I deliberately made some of the content well suited to advertise a certain type of business in our niche. Eventually, I managed to close a deal with such a business, which gave us just enough income to keep our head above water.During this time, an unexpected opportunity presented itself. A new game closely related to the one I was writing about pupped up and started gaining popularity (Auto Chess, which later turned into Dota Underlords). I was in a great situation to start writing about it and to turn our website into the main authority site on the subject, and slowly but surely I managed to rank our website in the first place in Google SERPs for most relevant keywords.(SERP screenshot)The hope was that the game was going to continue to grow (and our traffic along with it). This, in turn, would allow me to land bigger advertising contracts, giving me the needed funds to bootstrap a team and continue the validation experiments related to this new market and our newly acquired audience (I was trying to get the business into a positive feedback loop).Then this happened:(steam charts screenshot, player base falls)Dota Underlords (the game we attached ourselves to, our market) fell from over 200k to about 10k concurrent players. Naturally, as I had invested most of my time into Dota Underlords content, our traffic started falling as well, which invalidated the authority site plans and made new advertising sales much, much harder.You could argue I should have diversified our content to avoid this situation, but the reality is that you have limited resources and you need to plan how to use them. The business was created as a startup, it had investors, which by definition demands at least some level of ambition. Surviving as a niche gaming blog wasn’t going to cut it for the people involved, so I decided to go all-in on the opportunity I saw.It didn’t work out, but that’s OK. As mentioned, most startups fail. Sometimes they fail because of avoidable mistakes (as demonstrated above), but sometimes they fail because the educated bets they make don’t work out.Making educated but risky bets is what startups do, so don’t regret the second kind of failure when the risk is anticipated.LESSON 5: Accept full responsibility(comic 5, this one's not that funny :( )It’s quite easy to blame the circumstances when you’re looking back at past failures. It’s a great way to protect your ego. Going back to my own journey as an example:Startup environment: access to mentorship, funding, and know-how would have been much better if I was located in Silicon Valley. Yet, I tried to play the game of startups in Eastern Europe. Paul Graham sometimes mentions the concept of the Milanese Leonardo. In two words — there is no such thing, all great 15th century painters come from Florence, not Milan. So where are the Milanese painters? The theory is that the environment in which you develop trumps any kind of talent and probably even hard work. Maybe I’m a hardworking genius, but simply failed because of the unfavorable environment half-a-planet away from the Valley.Influencer partners: our two key influencer partners for the 2nd startup project bailed just before we launched. Surely they are to blame for the failure at launch, not me?Crisis in Ukraine: speaking of partners, our main business partners for the first startup were a Ukrainian esports organization. Shortly after launch, the political crisis in Ukraine happened and naturally, they were unable to fulfill all of their promises related to our project (they had bigger problems of their own). Surely we couldn’t have predicted geopolitical events while managing an esports startup?I could go on, we’re all masters at making excuses. However, this is a fool’s game. Analyzing your past circumstances is important, but only in the light of taking valuable lessons into the future. An excuse means you learned nothing from an important event.All of the above seems like it’s something I don’t have control over, but I’d argue that’s not true.Environment: I didn’t want to move to SV, but there are other ways to solve this problem at least partially. E.g. I could have reached out to people to ask for remote mentorship. “We have funding, we’re building this product, we want mentorship (weekly/monthly Skype calls) and we’re ready to give you a small share in the company to commit.” That’s not a bad offer and a viable way to make a connection to the real startup world.Partners: I could have done a thousand things to keep them more interested or involved in the project to minimize the chance they’ll quit. Even that aside, I could have made sure we’re not as reliant just on those two and involved more partners in advance.Crisis: sure, I couldn’t have predicted the geopolitical events, but I could have prepared for potential problems with our partners (same point as above). If someone is so important for your business that you fail if they underperform, you better have some plan to mitigate this risk. As a startup founder, you constantly operate in a high-risk environment. It’s your job to protect the project against the most critical and most likely of those risks.Past failures are a blessing — put them on your shoulders and they will make you stronger.Future failures are the ones you want to avoid, and your past failures are the best tool for the job.- - -If you were crazy enough to read all of it, I hope it was useful.(Here's the original Medium link if you want to see the images, feel free to ignore it. If it gets removed again without an explanation I give up.)

#/r/entrepreneur #reddit

0 notes

3one3 · 8 years

Text

The Sequel - 799

Thursday Night Inaction

André Schürrle, Juan Mata, other Chelsea/BVB players, and random awesome OC’s (okay they’re less random now but they’re still pretty awesome)

original epic tale

all chapters of The Sequel

Why am I so tired, Christina thought groggily when she realized she’d slept through at least 30 minutes of Europa League action. It was not her intention to lie down immediately after eating dinner and pass out. In fact, she usually made sure to remain upright for a while after eating in order to give her stomach a proper chance at tackling the food. Am I turning into him? He falls asleep whether he’s tired or not. There was no need to question why Juan was snoring through the Thursday Cup. He didn’t care about sitting up after dinner. He got comfortable, and then Christina got comfortable next to and on top of him, and then Mourinho’s team put them both to sleep. It was halftime when the rider woke up.

I don’t want to move. I wanna go back to sleep. But if I sleep for like two hours right now, am I going to struggle to go to bed later? I can’t stay up all night and sleep in. Espen doesn’t get here until 9 so I have to do the baby, before he climbs out of his crib and tries to pee on his giraffe or something, she thought, trying to be still as she yawned and not wake her friend too. From her vantage point on the left of his chest, his evening nap looked peaceful and nice too. I wonder what he’s dreaming about. If I were him I think I would probably have dreams about scoring crazy goals all the time, or anxiety dreams, caught in some weird situations with me and Taylor. Or maybe he has some totally unrelated dreams, where he’s just a guitar playing hipster kid, unfamous, under the radar, enjoying public transportation and meeting genuine girls. How many different ways would he try to hurt me if I broadcast his nap on Instagram Live right now? Where’s his phone? It would be funnier to do it on his own account, for his fans. I don’t know how many of his fans still follow me. Probably just the girls. His four and a half million followers would find a live stream of his nap far more entertaining than my half a million. The Daily Mail would probably publish a story about it. Such scandal. Friend falls asleep at friend’s house, on the couch, fully clothed, with a dog on his lap. Actual headline: “Mou’s Man United puts Mata to sleep with lonely Christina Schürrle”.

Christina managed to get through the first few minutes of the second half and then dozed off again. Like her dogs, it was very difficult for her to resist a nap when in a comfortable position and in contact with a warm, steady-breathing body. She had a little dream about being in an airport and unable to find the right departure gate for her flight. It was kind of distressing, but not enough to wake her. Juan’s phone did that. It was about 10 o’clock and his dad had something to tell him. His ex-girlfriend really hated it when dads have something to communicate to their sons when she was trying to do things with said sons. André’s dad interrupted many a nap. André responded to her irritation by teasing her for secretly just being jealous of people who actually take calls from their dad, but that stopped when hers was no longer able to call. She texted the German while the Spaniard wandered around the house on the phone.

“Tell me something good to try to have dreams about tonight,” she requested of her partner, who she figured was getting ready for bed. He would have had late training since the team played Wednesday night, which would mean no afternoon nap, which would mean early to bed. Borussia Dortmund lost 1-0 to Benfica. They created about a million chances to score and nobody could get the ball in the net. Marco missed gimmes. Auba wasted good opportunities and blew a penalty. They had complete control over the game but couldn’t get a goal, and the one they conceded was mostly a goalkeeping error. André got to play a bit towards the end, but Marco and Auba came off and left him with the sort of second tier of attacking players to try to make something work. It didn’t. And the team’s next match, against Wolfsburg, would happen without the encouragement of the 20,000-strong Südtribune, closed by decree of the DFB as punishment for the actions of violent ultras against Bundesliga culture outcasts RB Leipzig. No one could argue that the situation at the club wasn’t growing tense.

“How about landscaping? Do you want to get some gardener people in to make everything beautiful? I know it’s winter but spring is coming!!! Dream about your stable and our nice home dressed up in plants and flowers :)))” the team’s #21 suggested with a small smile on his face. He was in the process of transferring from video games on the couch to a movie in bed, and he liked that Christina wanted to have a good dream, and even more so that she asked him for an idea. The one he gave her rose from his longstanding belief that nice landscaping is a sign of class and care. He liked when people took pride in the impression given by their home, inside and out. Having tidy plantings could really make a property look nice, and most importantly, make it look like a place people care about. André wanted his wife to develop an emotional attachment to their new home, because he thought that would mean she was happy there. One of the first things he did when he wanted to get her back from Juan was get the guys in charge of keeping the grounds presentable to go plant bushes and flowers at the barn so that it looked inviting and permanent to her when he brought her there to see it. Landscaping was like a sign of roots to him. It was like the opposite of an apartment full of Ikea furniture with nothing on the walls and no signs of “homeyness”.

“So your son can “water” these plants?”

“Once again, why is he MY son when he does something bad and YOUR son when he says a difficult new word?” André thought Lukas trying to pee on a potted plant was the funniest thing ever. He died laughing when he got the text about it, and the photo of the puddle on the dining room floor. He sent a screenshot of the message and picture to all his friends. Marco replied that Noah “rage peed” on things now and then to get back at people for punishing him or preventing him from doing something he wanted. Things included his two-year-old cousin. André decided not to warn his girl that they could be in for that sort of thing.

“Because it’s your genes that compel him to do bad things. I would never pee on a plant.”

“No, you just pee behind garbage dumpsters.”

“I had no choice! He literally doesn’t have to do anything to pee. He can just go. If I had a diaper on that night then I wouldn’t have peed behind a dumpster.”

“If you were the kind of person who goes out drinking in an adult diaper, I don’t think we’d know each other.”

“Are you going to leave me when I’m old and have to wear diapers? :(“

“I’m sure I’ll be in them before you, and probably with dementia, so I won’t know who you are anyway.”

“That’s depressing. I don’t want us to get old.”

“Where is the chocolate cake, my angel of delicious food?” Juan groan-sighed as he suddenly gripped Christina’s shoulders from behind the couch. “I need more cake.”

“Angel of delicious food?” she asked back skeptically.

“I don’t know. I was winging it.”

“You’re making angel puns now?”

“Just one. I need cake though.”

“Why?” The rider leaned her head back on the couch cushion to get a look at the weary sounding footballer. “Restaurant problems?”

“He wants to change the name. Materials have already been ordered. Permits are already in writing. It’s all been tested, and there is a whole marketing plan. I want to suffocate him with a flour sack.” He covered her mouth with his hand to demonstrate his frustration, but the rider’s cheeks lifted and scrunched into her eyes to prove she was smiling under there anyway. It was novel for something to go wrong for him, or for him to appear stressed about something that wasn’t to do with her or his girlfriend. Also, she rather liked it when he covered her mouth. “I need more cake and coconut whipped cream.”

“Both are in the fridge,” she told him when he slid his palm down to the front of her throat to knead her neck. “I have vanilla frozen yogurt too if you want to heat up your piece of cake and make an epic stress dessert out of it and have scary dreams from all the sugar right before bed. Speaking of bed- are you staying?”

“I brought my pajamas.” The Chelsea man gestured down at his adidas shorts as if having changed into them was a guarantee that he was sleeping over. Christina didn’t really need to ask, regardless of his outfit. She couldn’t remember the last time he came over and didn’t stay. “Do you want cake?” Juan questioned, evidently satisfied that the question of where he was sleeping had been settled.

“No thank you.”

He pinched her nose before turning to head to the kitchen, and left her to return to her texting. André said they were a long way from getting old. He said she didn’t look a day over the day he met her, which evoked laughter.

“I wish I could say the same about you, babe. But you’ve aged like 10 years in about 5.”

“You’re so mean to me. I gave you chocolate pretzels.”

“I gave you a child.”

“Yeah but he pees on plants.”

“I was talking to Nat earlier about how I need to pack some things before the movers come, like my jewelry and our vital paperwork, and sex toys. I have 3 questions. What should I actually do with that stuff since I’m not coming back here between Sweden and Germany? I don’t want to fly with hundreds of thousands of dollars worth of jewelry and our un-lose-able documents and keep them in a hotel safe. And how are we moving the cars?”

“Do you want to fly home on Weds and drive one of them here? You could lock everything in the boot before you go to the horse show.”

Not really, Christina thought. I don’t want to road trip between Spain and moving, and I don’t want to drive across a bunch of countries with a car full of valuables. Just imagine if Stef and I got in an accident, or someone tried to carjack us when we stop for food. A scruffy man with cake sat next to her Indian style and smelled like burning chocolate.

“Sure you don’t want any?” he asked.

“No. How long did you microwave it? Five minutes?”

“Thirty seconds. It’s perfect. What are you doing?”

“Trying to figure out how to get my jewelry and important files to Dortmund. I don’t want to leave that to the movers or fly with all of it since I’m going all over the place,” she explained before giving André an answer about driving.

“You could leave it with me and take some whenever you go back and forth. How many files are you talking about?” Juan wolfed down a big chunk of cake with melting frozen yogurt and stiff whipped cream made from the solids that separate in cans of coconut milk.

“Not many. It’s like birth certificates, Lukas stuff, horse registrations. It’s more the jewelry I’m worried about. Like your diamond, and a drawer full of Cartier.”

“Why don’t you just use an insured shipping service to send it in the mail? People ship very valuable things like that all the time,” he shrugged before taking another big bite. Just looking at that is making my teeth hurt, the rider thought, her fingers tapping on the edges of her phone, knowing André was waiting for a reply. Not that I wouldn’t eat it. It also looks delicious. “Are you sure you don’t want a bite?”

“Yes. And it’s not the money I’m worried about. I don’t want to lose the things. I have so many pieces that mean the world to me- stuff my dad gave me before I hated him, stuff I wore like everyday when I was younger, special Schü gifts, your diamond.”

“Why do you keep calling it my diamond? It’s yours. It’s not like I gave it to you on loan.”

“I dunno.” Christina shrugged and told André she’d figure something out.

“I don’t want to drive. At least not that day. Can’t we ship the cars? Or I’ll come back and get them later. I’m sure there will be some reason that I have to come back here that week.”

“I guess. I’m going to sleep. Love youuuuuuuuuuuuu.”

“Love you. Nighties.”

“André?”

“Sí.”

“How is he?”

“Do you actually care?”

“Not especially. This is so good. I feel sick already, eating it, but it’s delicious.” The Spanish player made a face of mixed agony and joy, like he was professing his love to his cake while also breaking up with it over a long standing family feud or something. Christina laughed because it reminded her of herself when she was drunk, particularly when she was very drunk and granted the great pleasure of binge eating pizza. She believed that was the most intense love/hate relationship in her life- delicious, yummy, hot, gooey pizza that helped her not feel sick from drinking too much, but pizza she knew she was going to throw up later, or that would cement itself to her thighs.

“Chocolate fixes almost everything on the stress spectrum. And that cake at least isn’t full of white flour and butter. It’s like almost not totally terrible for you. Or it was until you covered it in frozen yogurt and whipped cream made from fat,” she smiled at the player savoring his dessert.

“If you had let me give you that diamond as I originally intended to, in an engagement ring, I would be so fat right now. If we lived together all this time?”

“I doubt that. You’d eat out less if I were cooking for you at home every day, and that’s automatically better for you even if I do make things like cake and fried chicken and giant dishes of macaroni and cheese sometimes. And- newsflash- that would have been a disaster anyway.” Christina frowned and patted her blanket down in her lap to invite Spencer to sit with her. Both pups were on their feet and on alert for cake crumbs. The tricolor one indeed moved over onto her, but he wasn’t ready to get comfortable and be petted. Juan was studying her while she was trying to get the dog’s attention.

“What would be a disaster?”

“I was going to live with you half the week and down here half the week because we couldn’t find a place for the horses, remember? I’m pretty sure I know now that that arrangement doesn’t work. Husband in one place and horses in another is too hard.” Her sudden onslaught of sadness and resignation was met with total nonchalance.

“Yeah but I would never let it get like that, like how it’s been for you. I told you that.”

“Why do you guys like to say shit like that? Like you can magically just fix problems? Then you don’t actually do it, and you don’t keep the promise, and then it’s worse. Then it’s not just the original problem, but also the letdown.” They’re all the same, the rider decided. At least all the guys I fall for, anyway. They want to fix everything, and take care of everything for me, and instead they make me go through hell while they realize it isn’t actually going to happen the way they wanted and promised.

“I say it because I mean it,” her ex shrugged, fork poised to capture some soupy vanilla and coconut mix. “If it didn’t work for us, I would have bought a facility near Manchester. You didn’t want to do that because of the cost, not because no acceptable place existed. And if you didn’t like it there, I would change clubs.”

“No you wouldn’t.”

“Yes I would. I would have changed that summer if it didn’t work for us.”

“No you wouldn’t. That would be silly.”

“I left there in the next window after that anyway, entirely because of you. It wasn’t right there without you, and I wanted to be closer to you to repair our relationship. I want to play football and have a good life off the pitch. It doesn’t matter that much where the two things happen.”

“Yeah but you’re saying that like your priorities are different and more noble than Schü’s,” the brunette with the bun argued. “He had to leave to be able to play.”

“Says who? You don’t think he could have done the job Marcos is doing? Marcos is no defender and he has half the ability going forward as André, and less pace. He was playing last year, and with a new manager coming in you don’t know what the situation is in June. He didn’t have to leave. He didn’t have to make the decision and then figure out how to handle it after, either.” Juan’s mouth was full of yummy cake but his voice was full of distaste. He’d harbored real disdain over what “André did” to Christina’s family, and never really let on about it until that night. His eyebrows got angry, which was something she seldom saw happen in any kind of serious way. Her response was mixed, because she didn’t like hearing her partner attacked but did like that someone wanted to speak up for better treatment for her. “If he was thinking of going, he could have figured out first where you would live and how long it would take to be ready. If he knew it would take half a year, then he could have waited and made the move in January. It’s trickier with the clubs, yes, but when you don’t even know what you’re trying to leave yet, what harm is there? And if the new club doesn’t want you badly enough to wait, are you really that important to them? Is it really going to be the situation you want? Family comes first for me. You come first. Never would I put you or any girl I love this way through what he has- not just this time, but last time too.”

“He let me decide, though.” Her defense for André was meek, and based mostly in her sense of loyalty rather than injustice. “He didn’t make a unilateral decision and force me to go along with it. I told him it was okay.”

“He only asked because he knew you wouldn’t say no. Just as I would never force that situation on you, you would never make him miss out on something he wants. You couldn’t even say no to him when he broke your heart into a hundred pieces and made you question if there was any point to living anymore. You only had that situation in the first place because you wouldn’t risk upsetting him during a football tournament to be honest and tell him you were in trouble and needed some help, some understanding. He asked you because he knew you would put his needs and his career first, like you always have. Don’t fool yourself into thinking anything else. It has nothing to do with your career and your life being more flexible than his, or his chances being more temporary, or any other way you justify your thinking. You just can’t say no to him.”

“Why are you so angry about this all of a sudden?” Christina asked, exasperated by the fervent ranting happening beside her on the couch. Cake crumbs were spilling out of the player’s mouth into his bowl because he was talking so fast and wouldn’t stop trying to eat at the same time.

“All of a sudden? Are you kidding?” he laughed.

“No.”

“I’m angry about this all the time! I’m angry that you woke up on Christmas Eve and called to tell me you love me and couldn’t wait to get home from the horse show so that you could be with me on Christmas and be one day closer to living together and having everything we want, and by the end of that night you were ignoring everything you felt in the morning simply because he asked you to. He asked you to ignore your feelings and go back to him based on his own feeling that you were supposed to be together, and you couldn’t say no! You just gave in. Don’t even try to tell me that it was the right decision either. You know better than anyone that your relationship with him has never gone back to the same. You get to the verge of leaving him every 6 months! You have the permanent doubt. You made this situation for yourself because you couldn’t deny him something he wanted. I’m never not angry about this. For you, and for myself. I’m never not angry that he can treat you like absolute shit and get away with it while I do everything you’re supposed to do when you truly love someone, and what I get for it is to be your backup boyfriend when you can’t be with him.”

Christina didn’t like being talked at. Juan was talking at her. He was complaining, and argumentative without arguing. He was frustrated, angry, aggrieved, disappointed, and condescending in a way his friend was quite familiar with. Every now and then he managed to make her feel very small and stupid, and she really hated that. It upset her instead of making her angry though. When people she cared about made her feel dumb, it was upsetting. When anyone else took a shot at her, it was an invitation for her to destroy them, and she usually accepted. The Spaniard also dropped truth on her all the time, and she couldn’t say what he ranted about was entirely wrong. In fact, nearly all of it was correct.

“You’re right,” she said after a brief pause to organize her thoughts and pet her dog. “But not about why I went back to him. It wasn’t because I just didn’t want to say no. I wanted him to be in love with me. I wanted to know that he was always in love with me and that I wasn’t stupid for thinking all that time that he was and always would be. I went back to him because he convinced me that he never stopped, or- I guess- I guess I should say he convinced me that he could convince me. I didn’t fully believe him that night, but I wanted to. I had no idea what to do, or how I felt, or what would happen. He convinced me that he was going to show me that he loves me forever no matter what. We get in fights now because he keeps giving me reasons to think he doesn’t.”

“And me? Do you ever think I don’t?” a smug looking midfielder questioned.

“No.”

“Why do so many intelligent girls choose a man they don’t believe really loves them over one they know does?”

“Just because he sometimes does things that make me think he doesn’t love me the way I want doesn’t mean he doesn’t actually love me. It just means I take things the wrong way.”

“What difference does it make if he really loves you if he makes you feel like he doesn’t? What do you want in life? To feel loved, or to be told you are?”

“Juanin, I am a grown up with a family. I have a son. I have a husband that I love dearly. We’ve been through a ton of terrible shit together and he’s still my partner in life. I’m not just going to leave him because sometimes he makes me feel bad, or feel like he doesn’t love me as much as I love him. I’m not 16. It’s not a fairytale. We don’t just throw away relationships, and families, because-“

“Okay, stop, stop, I get it,” Juan sighed. He put his fork down, leaving about two bites worth of cake left in the dish with it. He rolled his eyes too. “I’m just saying, don’t give him more credit than he deserves. It messes with your head. You think you owe him when you don’t. You don’t hold him accountable when you’re entitled. That makes you...It diminishes you, in a way, cariña,” he advised with earnestness and humility. “It makes you weaker, and when you feel weak in one area then it spreads to the others like cancer.”

“I know. I know what you’re saying. You’re not wrong. And I’m...like working on all of that. And I never forget that it’s different with you.” The rider rubbed his left arm, slowly and with real purpose. His forearm was warm, and her fingertips carefully rooted under the dark hairs to lift them almost one at time. She thought she knew what was really going on, and that it didn’t actually have that much to do with the injustice of her relationships with the two players. “I know you love me, and you always make me feel very loved, and I love you too, so I know how hard it is for you when you think someone doesn’t understand how much you care, or how much you’re trying to do the right things. Or when they don’t appreciate it. I appreciate very much that you always make sure you treat me like nothing in the world is more important to you, and I’m sure your dad appreciates the work you’re doing for the restaurant. I’m sure he’s not trying to change stuff because he doesn’t realize what you’re trying to do for him and that you’ve already made plans. He probably just didn’t think about it from that side. Everybody gets kind of single-minded in their pursuit of personal projects like that. It’s easy to ignore one’s better judgement when wrapped up in a dream. Don’t let it upset you.”

“You’re a sweet girl, cariña,” the blue Blue sighed with a halfhearted smile. He reached over the bowl in his left hand to pat her knee with the right.

0 notes