#there's fics on ao3 being uploaded every month what is going on here

[esoteric-choleric]

how is the reanimator fandom still alive. it's been 40 years

[hurtspideyparker]

Hi, sorry but could you recommend any of your favourite Peter Parker fics please?

For sure !!! *cracks open ao3 bookmarks*

Thirty Hours by polaroid15 - Peter doesn't take any breaks during a lengthy fight with the Avengers. The mind-melting fever that follows really should have been expected.

Hurt Peter Parker, my favourite tag <3 I love when Spider-Man is a badass and also lacks self-preservation. He's so cool fighting alongside the Avengers and we get some sweet hurt/comfort irondad!

Fitting In (Tiny Spaces) by aloneintherain - Peter's trapped beneath a collapsed building during a mission, hurt and unable to move. Luckily, his comm still works. Unluckily, the Avengers don’t realise how bad of a state Peter is in, and Peter isn’t inclined to tell them.

This fic is an icon in the fandom and for GOOD REASON. I just can not get enough of Peter Parker hiding his injuries. More heavy whump and angst!

All good things come in threes by Bergen - Peter has three secret identities: Spider-Man, the superhero who swings around the city to save people. Parker Benjamin, who gives Tony Stark unsolicited advice on his research. And NightMonkey, the Instagrammer who keeps uploading increasingly popular but embarrassing drawings of Iron Man.

And he can juggle them all just fine, thankyouverymuch.

Okay here is the fluff!!! Peter is a genius, a menace, and a sweetheart. Tony Stark runs into him (again and again) and can't help but have a soft spot for him every time. Funny and cute and an all 'round good time!

Held Together by Spiderwebs by TunaFishChris - Steve is not coping well in the twenty-first century. At all. Three months after the Chitauri invasion, he decides he's had enough.

But just as he's about to end it all, he runs into the new hero in town.

This one focuses a lot on Steve but I really like him and Peter's relationship in it, and I think this is great Peter Parker characterization. TW for discussions of depression and suicide, it gets a bit dark!

5 Times Spider-Man Saved an Avenger's Ass (and 1 Time They Saved Him) by TunaFishChris - this fic showcases how strong and capable Peter is, he's definitely a BAMF. I really like this genre where the Avengers know Spider-Man but not Peter Parker, makes Peter feel more independent and mature like in the comics.

Five Time Faculty Members Had to Call Peter's Emergency Contact + One Time He Shows Up Anyway, Five Times Tony Stark's Fabled Intern Just Showed Up + One Time He Was Invited, and Five Times Strangers Talked About Peter and Tony + One time Someone They Know Did by kingdomfaraway - I am just gonna recommend this entire series. Super fluffy, extreme irondad and spiderson. They're just adorable from an outside perspective and I love when Peter gets to just be Tony's intern and a teenager for a while :)

research and disaster by blueh - “So, uh, Mr. Stark definitely knows Roomba-Kid,” Becket says and discreetly tilts his head in the direction of the pair.

“Oh my god,” Jess says. She almost sounds gleeful. “Oh my god, he’s not just some random kid. He’s Mr. Stark’s kid.”

or: the interns at Stark Industries have some questions about Peter Parker. The answers aren’t quite what they expect.

I just love intern Peter mk? Let him be a kid genius and have fun!!! Fluffy and humorous, again with the irondad.

Captain, Oh My- Not My Captain! by uncouth_peasant - Peter swallowed hard before firing a web to swing into the fray. “Cap’s going after civilians. I’m out of time.”

Bruised and bloody men <3. Just Peter being a badass and getting beat to a pulp. Cool fighting, lots of Peter whump, and of course the Avengers being protective.

Good publicity by Bergen - Between Peter Parker barely speaking, and Spider-Man being the ultimate chatterbox, how was Tony ever supposed to figure out that they were one and the same person?

Tony Stark is secretly a softie for cute kids, especially when they're a genius and have a sense of humour to rival his own. Peter is a foster kid who ends up finding a home with Pepper and Tony, very sweet.

The Third Option by Uncertainty_Principle - When Ben is murdered Peter goes into foster care. It takes just a tiny taste of superpowers for Peter to decide he doesn’t want to put up with his horrible foster father anymore—the streets are infinitely more appealing. All he wants is to be Spider-Man anyway.

So he leaves, simple.

Simple, that is, until Iron Man needs Spider-Man’s help.

Heavy TW for this one, mind the tags. This is a popular fic and for good reason. A very mature and realistic portrayal of the foster care system and homelessness. The Peter angst is really great and I could barely put it down, that boy needs a hug so bad.

Now here's some hydra!Peter fics cuz they're my jam:

Peter is a precious chickpea by Bergen - They attack the HYDRA safe house shortly before sunrise.

The only people defending said safe house are Peter and Leo, and Leo slams his cell door open and starts spitting out orders, but then promptly gets clobbered over the head and keels sideways.

So that just leaves Peter. And he’s not even going to try to fight a whole team of Avengers. He looks up at Iron Man filling the doorway. “I surrender.”

He’s never been captured before and he’s not sure what to do. Escape, probably.

This entire series is PERFECT. I just love how adorable Peter is, and all the relationships Peter forms with the Avengers absolutely melt my heart. Peter's characterization in this is really unique and I wish there was more. The Bucky and Peter friendship is everythingggg. I love hydra!peter and bucky fics.

Indoctrination by phoenixon - The Avengers thought they were on a typical assignment: Infiltrate the Hydra base and find the weapon. What they didn't expect was the small boy raised by Hydra that they found instead. And they definitely didn't expect him to stay at Avengers Tower or how he somehow wormed his way into their lives. As for Peter, he just wants to be good and obey what the Hydra men told him so he doesn't get in trouble.

I just really love hydra Peter changing into a sweet and intelligent boy once he's rescued and safe, and how all the Avengers take up such heart-warming parental roles around him.

out there, living in the sun by Hailfire_73 - The Avengers rescue Peter from a Hydra base ran by his father, Richard Parker, except Peter doesn't really see it as a rescue, and has trouble settling into a new life away from Hydra and his father at the Avengers compound. OR - Peter learns how to be an actual teenager, live life, and put his abusive past behind him, and Tony learns how to be a father.

Hydra Peter but he's most definitely a traumatized and moody teenager. I really enjoyed Peter's character arc and the exploration of his trauma. It felt more realistic the way his journey isn't just a straight or clear path. He's more mature in this one and it was a really compelling read, balancing the angst with some humour and fluff. Loved the ending.

Tinker, Tailor, Spider by Bergen - Tony is roped into a mission to transport a teenager to safety. But when things go south, it soon becomes more and more puzzling who the teenager is and what ‘safety’ means for him.

I really enjoy that the author doesn't water Peter being hydra down. Yes he is a highly skilled assassin and a badass who's trauma pervades his every thought and decision. Made me fall in love with the Tony, Pepper, Morgan and Peter as a family dynamic. Super domestic while still highlighting Peter's troubled past.

[melancholy-of-nadia]

heart on the window #6 (m) | ksj

title: heart on the window (m) pairing: ksj x reader(f) rating/genre: m (18+) ; smut ; roommates au / streamer/cam boy au / office worker au, childhood rivals to awkward roommates to lovers? au summary: Job hunting is inevitable as you want to be professionally employed again despite your secret camming side hustle with Jin. however, finally, you reached the final interview for a role you applied to at Netflix! But Jin wants to spontaneously also have a house/apartment party on the same day as well?! what kind of shit will happen as you juggle prepping and going to a big interview that could change your life and a party with friends after that might reveal secrets and have you thinking twice about your old childhood friend / housemate / camming partner? note: surprise again! uploaded this a day earlier since i somehow got time to edit and have this done! s/o to @daegudrama for continuously helping edit this mess of a fic. pls enjoy the climax ;) because its all downhill from here. warnings: HELLO! Another BTS MEMBERS cameo because bts know each other somehow in every universe, many more cameos, mild language, house party, this is the most tame chapter, job interview is a warning bc that triggers ME, yoongi being a lil shit, confessions, secrets revealed, jin is a simp, jealousy, namjoon kinda crushing on reader, drunk arguing, angst, drunk messy makeout, a lot of internal monologuing drop date: May 9th, 3:00pm pst word count: 11.6k crossposted on ao3 here <- chapter 5 | chapter 7 -> - -

Another day of streaming on Chaturbate, you sit perched on the living room couch in a maid outfit that leaves little to the imagination, your stockings tugging high against your thighs as Jin fusses over the setup.

“Hey,” Jin’s voice pulls you out of your thoughts. He’s standing in front of you now, holding a small ring light in one hand and a cable in the other. “Do you think this angle looks okay? Or should I move it closer to the couch? I’m trying not to make it obvious to people who have been theorizing Big Tuna Man is me.”

You glance up at him, then at the setup he’s been tweaking for the past twenty minutes. The couch is bathed in a soft, flattering glow from the ring light, and the angle seems just right—enough to highlight your outfit without giving away too much of the room’s details. You can’t help but laugh a little at how seriously he’s taking this.

“Jin, it’s fine,” you say, adjusting the frilly headband perched on your head. “If people are that obsessed with figuring out if you’re Big Tuna Man, they’ve got way too much time on their hands. Besides, it’s not like your ‘just chatting’ streams show this much of the living room anyway.”

He frowns, still fiddling with the cable. “Yeah, but you never know. The internet’s full of detectives. One wrong angle, and someone’s going to connect the dots that Streamer Jin is BigTunaMan.” He steps back, tilting his head as he surveys the setup. 

“You usually set up a green screen for your gaming streams on the couch, I think you will definitely be fine.” He shrugs in defeat and settles for what he got set up.

You scoot over to make room for him on the couch, and he sits down beside you, close enough that your shoulders brush. He smells like his usual mix of citrus and something warm, like vanilla. It’s a scent you’ve grown accustomed to, one that feels like home.

“So,” he says, leaning back on his hands and stretching his legs out in front of him. “I overheard you talking on the phone with your friend earlier?

You sigh, running a hand through your hair. “Oh yeah, that’s Yunjin. She and another one of my friends want to come over to visit me and have a little get-together of sorts. It’s been very overdue and we’ve been delaying it because they’ve been busy with work.”

Yunjin was supposed to come over months ago when you moved in with Jin for a house warming party, but with her being busy at her corporate job as well, it just never seemed to work out. Same with Wendy.

But it seems like they finally aligned and took this upcoming Friday off.

Jin hums thoughtfully, his fingers drumming a light rhythm against his knee. “A get-together, huh? That’s cute. But…” He trails off, his lips curling into a grin that immediately sets off warning bells in your head that he’s plotting something.

You narrow your eyes at him. “But what?”

“Why not make it bigger?” His grin spreads wider, eyes gleaming with a mischievous light you know all too well. “We could throw an actual party. Like, a real one. I’ll invite my friends, you invite yours. We’ll have drinks, music, food—the works. No cameras, no streams, just a good time.”

You blink at him, caught off guard. “A party-party? Since when are you the type to host anything? You’re usually the guest at other people’s parties.”

Jin gasps in mock offense, clutching his chest like you’ve just mortally wounded him. “Hey! I am perfectly capable of hosting a killer party. I just… haven’t had a reason to. Until now.”

You scoff, shaking your head. “Right. And where exactly are we going to fit all these people? Your apartment isn’t exactly a mansion, Jin.”

“Details,” he says with a wave of his hand, dismissing your concern. “We’ll make it work. Come on, it’ll be fun! Don’t you think we deserve a night to just… relax? No work, no stress. Just us and our friends having a good time.”

You hesitate, your mind racing with all the reasons this is a terrible idea. It’s not just the logistics of cramming that many people into Jin’s small apartment—it’s the stuff. The things that have become a part of your strange, shared life here. The sex toys, the costumes, the equipment. The things that live in drawers, closets, and sometimes out in the open because you’ve both grown too comfortable to care.

“Jin…” you start, your voice trailing off. “You realize we’d have to… hide everything, right?”

He tilts his head, feigning innocence. “What do you mean?”

“You know what I mean.” You gesture vaguely around the room. “The… production set up. The costumes. The toys. Unless you want one of your friends stumbling across a vibrator in the kitchen or tripping over your favorite handcuffs in the living room.”

Jin bursts out laughing, doubling over as he clutches his stomach. “Okay, okay, fair point,” he says between laughs. “We’ll do a full sweep of the apartment before the party. No one’s gonna find anything they shouldn’t.”

You give him a skeptical look. “You’re really serious about this, aren’t you?”

“Dead serious.” He sits up straight, his expression suddenly earnest. “I think it’d be good for us. To just socialize and be normal for a night here. No personas, no performance. Just you and me and our friends, having fun.”

The sincerity in his voice catches you off guard, and for a moment, you forget to argue. He’s right. Things have been so tangled lately, so wrapped up in the strange bubble you’ve created together, that the idea of stepping outside of it—even just for a night—is undeniably appealing.

“Okay,” you say finally, leaning back against the headboard. “But if we’re doing this, you’re helping me clean. And you’re in charge of hiding your stuff.”

“Deal,” he says with a wink. “This is gonna be great, princess. You’ll see.” He laughs, the sound rich and warm, and it makes something in your chest tighten from the way he refers to you.

And as much as you hate to admit it, a part of you hopes he’s right.

“Gee, I hope so,” you deadpan, but you’re smiling. It’s easy to smile around him. Too easy.

The two of you fall into a comfortable silence, the kind that doesn’t need to be filled with words. You watch as he fiddles with the settings on his camera, his brow furrowed in concentration. It’s moments like these that make you wonder if he feels it too—this unspoken thing between you. The way your eyes linger a little too long when he’s not looking. The way he always finds an excuse to touch you, even if it’s just a casual brush of his hand against yours. The way the air seems to shift whenever you’re alone together, charged with something you can’t quite name.

But neither of you says anything. Not yet.

“Alright,” Jin says finally, breaking the silence. “You ready?”

“Always.”

Of course, the universe has an odd sense of humor. The one day you’re frantically juggling last-minute party preparations—decorations, confirming guests that will be there, and a “menu” that still isn’t finalized—is also the day of your final-round interview at Netflix. Not just any interview, but for a Consumer Content Insights Analyst role. You’d been dreaming about this opportunity for the last two weeks, and somehow, against all odds, you’d made it this far. 

You’ve made it to a couple of final rounds for other roles, so you’re telling yourself not to get your hopes all up, but to give it your best.

As you step into one of Netflix’s sleek, glass-walled buildings that late Friday morning, you can’t help but feel like a lost deer wandering into a forest of overachievers. The moment you step into the towering glass building, you feel like an imposter. The Netflix logo looms over the lobby, and the swarm of well-dressed employees moving with purpose only amplifies the pit in your stomach. You’re not supposed to be here. This is Netflix—Netflix. It feels too big, too surreal, too out of reach. The irony isn’t lost on you—your current odd way of life with Seokjin and your borderline-obsessive love for Netflix’s romcoms have collided in the most absurd way. Shows like Never Have I Ever, The Kissing Booth, and To All the Boys I’ve Loved Before weren’t just guilty pleasures, but your comfort zone, your escape, and apparently, your secret weapon.

During the earlier rounds, you’d managed to strike a balance between professionalism and fangirling, especially with the Talent Acquisition lead. She seemed to appreciate your genuine passion for Netflix’s content, paired with the analytical chops you’d honed at your last job. It’s a miracle you made it this far, but here you are, standing in the lobby, clutching your portfolio and trying to remember if you’d actually brushed your hair this morning.

You take a deep breath, reminding yourself that this is it—the final hurdle. Whether it was your love for romcoms, your ability to geek out over data trends, or just sheer dumb luck, you’d earned this shot. Now, all you had to do was not screw it up.

But somehow, by some miracle, you’ve made it this far.

You smooth down the fabric of your blazer, clutching your portfolio just a little tighter as the receptionist checks you in. Your reflection stares back at you from the polished elevator doors, and for a second, you barely recognize yourself. You’ve spent months streaming in lace and silk, whispering sinful things into Jin’s mic. And now, here you are, dressed in corporate chic, about to pitch why you belong in a boardroom instead of on a not-safe-for-work streaming website.

The universe is funny like that.

By the time you’re escorted to the conference room, your nerves are a tangled mess. You pass by walls adorned with larger-than-life posters of their biggest hits—Stranger Things, Bridgerton, Wednesday, and, of course, To All the Boys I’ve Loved Before. It almost feels like a taunt. Your ridiculous love for Netflix romcoms might actually be the thing that gets you this job.

Inside, four panelists sit across from an empty chair, their smiles polite but unreadable. You recognize one of them immediately—Gia Kim, the woman who would be your direct manager if you get the job. You’ve done your research on her. She’s sharp, a powerhouse in consumer insights, and someone you know you could learn a lot from.

“Welcome,” Gia says, gesturing for you to sit. Her voice is even, professional, but there’s a warmth to it that helps you breathe a little easier. “We’re excited to chat with you today.”

You settle into your seat, offering a polite, rehearsed smile. “Thank you for having me. I’m really excited to be here.”

The first half of the interview goes as expected—questions about your experience, projects you’ve led, data you’ve analyzed, strategies you’ve developed. You navigate them smoothly, pulling from your previous job, highlighting how you’ve understood consumer behaviors, engagement trends, and audience retention analytics. The other panelists nod approvingly, jotting down notes, occasionally exchanging glances with one another.

Then, Gia leans forward slightly, setting her pen down. There’s a shift in the air, like she’s about to ask something different and out of the ordinary.

“One last question,” she says, resting her chin on her hand. “In this role, you’ll be helping us understand why people connect so deeply with certain stories, why certain characters or narratives resonate across different cultures. In your opinion, what makes a story unforgettable?”

The question hits you in a place you weren’t expecting.

Your mind floods with images of living with Jin these past couple of months. His laugh, his voice murmuring in your ear, the way he looks at you when he thinks you’re not paying attention. The slow, dangerous unraveling between you, the blurred lines, the quiet moments off-camera that feels like it means more but just not addressing it.

What makes a story unforgettable?

You take a slow breath, collecting your thoughts before you speak.

“I think the most unforgettable stories,” you begin, your voice steady but thoughtful, “are the ones that reflect something deeply human back at us. The ones that make us feel seen, even in ways we don’t fully understand.”

Gia watches you intently, nodding for you to continue.

“Whether it’s a coming-of-age romance or a dark psychological drama, the best stories don’t just entertain—they expose us. They show us our own fears, our desires, our contradictions. They remind us of what we’ve lost, what we still want, and maybe, if we’re lucky, what we didn’t realize we needed.”

You swallow, feeling your chest tighten slightly. “It’s not just about the plot or the characters. It’s about the way a story lingers. The way it makes you think about someone days later, even when you don’t mean to. It’s the way it changes how you see yourself, or how you see someone else.”

There’s a silence. A pause.

Oh shit… did you fuck up with that philosophical ass response?! You look at each of the panelists waiting for a response, which ends up coming from Gia. Fuck. This may not end well after all– “That was… beautifully said.” Oh? Uh, you’re not sure if that’s sarcasm or genuine, because you can’t honestly tell after many amazing interviews that end up with a rejection days or even hours later. But fuck it! You tried, and if they don’t want you, then you’ll keep trying. Either applying to another role at this company or elsewhere. You recall a memory of Seokjin teaching you how to make pajeon, being afraid of flinging the pajeon once you try to flip the pan to cook it. “If you fling it, then you fling it. You can always clean up and try again.”

You smile, remembering that moment and the response you gave to their question.

The panelists exchange another glance, and for the first time all morning, you let yourself think—whatever happens, happens.

After coming home from your interview and running errands, you immediately notice two things upon opening the door: the living room looks completely different, and Seokjin is standing there in nothing but a white t-shirt and a pair of ridiculously short shorts that show off his toned, golden legs.

He appears from around the corner, a bright grin on his face. “Hey! You’re back! How did it go?”

You blink, momentarily distracted by the absolute scam that is his genetics, before shaking yourself back to reality. “Oh, uh, I think it went well? But I honestly don’t want to get my hopes up.”

Jin waves a dismissive hand, walking closer with an easy confidence that somehow makes his whole outfit look even more intentional. “Nah, I’m sure you got this! I overheard you talking excitedly with the recruiter a few weeks ago, so I do think you have a high chance.”

You snort, rolling your eyes as you set your bag down by the door. “Thanks for inflating my ego.”

“You’re welcome,” he quips, placing a hand on his hip. “I inflate mine all the time, and that’s how I got here.”

You burst into laughter, the stress from earlier melting just slightly. Typical Jin.

Stepping further into the living room, you finally take in the sheer effort that’s gone into setting up for tonight’s party. The couch has been pushed back to make room, streamers are partially hung along the walls, and the coffee table has been swapped out for a makeshift drink station, complete with bottles of soju, whiskey, and a ridiculous amount of mixers. The chairs from the dining table are missing—probably relocated to hold the obscene amount of food you assume Jin ordered.

And then, hunched on the floor with an expression of pure suffering, is a familiar figure.

Yoongi.

Jin’s longtime best friend, the guy who essentially convinced him to start streaming (games and porn) in the first place, and someone who, by all accounts, prefers the company of his music studio over people. It’s been so long since you’ve last seen him. This is probably the fifth time you’re seeing him in person compared to any of his other friends. He doesn’t even bother to look up as he speaks.

“Hi. Nice to see you again after so long. My back is fucking killing me thanks to Seokjin making me from sit and hunch over to make this shit,” he deadpans, still threading a streamer through his fingers.

How lovely. Such a contrast from Jin, yet somewhat similar.

You blink, glancing at the pile of tangled decorations in front of him. “Uh, well, hi.”

Jin chuckles from behind you, clearly unbothered. “Yoongi’s not exactly a party planner, but he’s suffering through this for us. Isn’t that nice?”

Yoongi scoffs. “I actually am, and also I’m here because you bribed me with the promise of good food and free drinks.”

“Well, you are getting free drinks,” Jin points out, arms crossed. “That has to count for something.”

Yoongi finally looks up at you, his sharp eyes assessing. “Surprised your infamous roommate is still here, Jin. Do you know he talks about you way too much.”

You arch a brow. “Oh? And what exactly does he say?”

Jin clears his throat loudly, throwing a warning glance at Yoongi, who just smirks. “Nothing too incriminating, but just a lot about the sex you two are hav–.”

“Alright, alright,” you say, waving a hand. “Yoongi, if your back hurts, you could sit on the dining chairs—”

“He moved them,” Yoongi interrupts flatly, tilting his head toward Jin. “To put all the food and alcohol on the table. He’s also going to set up a beer pong table later.”

You sigh. “Never mind.”

With a shake of your head, you step toward the hallway leading to your room. “I’m gonna go change out of this stuffy blazer and then I’ll come help you guys. Sounds good?”

“Sounds good,” Jin calls after you. “But don’t take too long. I need you to approve my outfit choice.”

You pause mid-step, glancing back over your shoulder. “Why do I need to approve it?”

Jin grins. “Because you have good taste, obviously.” “Well, it’s not giving ‘party’ vibes to me, it’s giving ‘run club’.” Jin rolls his eyes and scoffs. Yoongi groans, already regretting being here. “God, just go change before he starts monologuing about how hot he looks.”

Laughing, you disappear into your room, already feeling lighter than you did when you first walked in. Twenty minutes later, you emerge from your room, freshly transformed. Your light green Solid Ruffle Knotted Rib Crop Tank Top hugs your frame just right, the delicate fabric subtly highlighting your curves, while your medium-wash flare jeans flare out at the perfect moment, accentuating your silhouette. A pair of star-shaped hairpins glint on either side of your hair, adding a playful touch to the look.

Yoongi and Seokjin—now dressed in a University of Michigan crewneck and khaki pants, respectively—are lounging in the living room when you step in. The moment they see you, their conversation trails off, and their eyes widen slightly. You pause, giving them a slow twirl, the fabric of your jeans swishing softly as you turn.

“Well?” you ask, a teasing smile tugging at your lips. “Thoughts?” For a moment, they’re silent, their expressions caught somewhere between awe and disbelief. Yoongi’s eyebrows shoot up, while Seokjin’s mouth opens slightly, as if he’s about to say something, but no words come out. They just stare, dumbfounded, and you can’t help but laugh at their reaction.

“That good, huh?” you say, breaking the silence as you smooth out your top, secretly pleased with their stunned silence. Jin is the first to snap out of it, blinking rapidly as if rebooting his entire system. “H-Holy shit,” he mutters under his breath, just loud enough for you to hear. His eyes flicker over you, taking in the way the snug fabric of your crop top clings to your curves, the way your jeans sit perfectly on your waist, emphasizing all the right places.

Yoongi, ever the composed one, simply lets out a long, dramatic sigh. “I already know tonight’s gonna be a fucking headache.”

You smirk, placing a hand on your hip. “I’ll take that as a compliment.”

Jin clears his throat, finally finding his voice. “I mean—yeah, obviously. You look… wow. Really good.” He gestures vaguely at your outfit. “Like, uh. Yeah.”

“Like, uh. Yeah?” you repeat, teasing. “Is that all you’ve got?”

Yoongi rolls his eyes, standing up from his spot on the floor and brushing imaginary dust off his sweats. “You know you look good. Don’t make him suffer.”

Jin scowls. “Shut up, dude.”

You laugh, reaching over to adjust one of your star hairpins. “Alright, enough staring. What’s left to do before people get here?”

Jin, still looking slightly dazed, snaps back into party-host mode. “Uh, we still need to get the speakers from Yoongi’s car, set up the drink station properly, and—oh! We need ice. Lots of ice.”

You nod, rolling up your sleeves (metaphorically, since you’re sleeveless, but still). “Alright. I’ll help grab the speakers. Give me the keys.” You motion towards Yoongi, who shuffles for them in his jeans’ pockets and hands them to you. “It’s parked in the guest spot by the gate. Don’t you dare drop those speakers, okay?”

“Got it, will be right back.”

You go out the door and leave it slightly ajar so you can come back in easily. The two men are working on their tasks in silence until they realize you’re at a far enough range where you won’t hear what is being said inside. Yoongi looks at Seokjin, who’s hunched over the cooler, shoveling ice inside a little too aggressively. The tips of Jin’s ears are still tinged red.

“So you two aren’t dating yet?” Yoongi asks casually, as if he’s commenting on the weather.

Jin nearly drops an entire bag of ice onto the floor. “Goddamn it, Yoongi…what are you on about now?”

Yoongi leans against the counter, expression unreadable as he watches Jin fumble to compose himself. “Well, considering how you’ve clearly gotten real close in the past few months, I was just wondering.” He shrugs. “You know, since you were so adamant that she, and I quote, ‘absolutely did not want to live with me and doesn’t like me at all.’”

Jin exhales sharply through his nose, standing up straight and dusting his hands off like that’ll help shake off whatever Yoongi is implying. “She didn’t like me at first,” he argues, though there’s no real conviction behind it.

Yoongi hums, clearly unimpressed. “And now?”

Jin doesn’t answer immediately. Instead, he focuses on the ice cooler like it’s the most fascinating thing he’s ever seen. But Yoongi isn’t stupid. He catches the way Jin’s jaw tightens slightly, the way his fingers still against the rim of the cooler like he’s sorting through thoughts he doesn’t want to say out loud.

Yoongi smirks. Interesting, he thinks.

Yoongi doesn’t let up. He leans against the counter, arms crossed, watching Jin with that same unreadable expression.

“So?” he presses. “What’s stopping you now?”

Jin exhales sharply, rubbing the back of his neck. “I don’t know,” he admits, his voice quieter this time. “We’re trying to be adults about this. Keep things professional since we’re roommates and agreed to do camming together.”

Yoongi lifts a brow. “Professional?” He snorts. “Jin, you two are literally fucking on camera for money. The line was crossed the second you got her naked in front of an audience.”

Jin glares. “It’s not just that.”

Yoongi doesn’t respond right away, letting the silence stretch. Jin feels the weight of his own words settle between them.

“It’s different off-camera,” he continues after a moment, his voice low. “The way we talk. The way we are around each other. It’s… real.”

Yoongi tilts his head slightly. “And that scares you.”

Jin swallows. He doesn’t answer.

Because yeah. It does scare him.

He’s spent months pretending that what happens between you two is just another part of the arrangement. That the way he watches you when you’re not looking, the way he feels a pull in his chest when you laugh at his stupid jokes, the way his body reacts when you’re just there—all of it is just residual chemistry from the streams.

But it’s not.

And the fact that he can’t stop thinking about you, even when the cameras are off, is proof of that.

Yoongi, ever perceptive, sighs like he already knows exactly what’s running through Jin’s head. “You’re an idiot,” he says finally.

Jin scoffs. “Yeah, well. You’re not wrong.”

The conversation dies down for a moment, both of them lost in their own thoughts. Then Yoongi straightens, glancing toward the front door. “She’s been gone a while. Think she got lost?”

Jin smirks, glad for the change of subject. “Nah, she probably got distracted by some guy’s dog in the parking lot. She does that.”

Yoongi chuckles, shaking his head. “Yeah. You’re so fucked, man.”

Jin doesn’t argue. Because Yoongi is literally so fucking right.

By the time you return with the speakers, the living room has been completely transformed. Jin and Yoongi have finished hanging the last of the streamers, and the drink station is fully stocked with a dangerously large selection of alcohol. The speakers are strategically placed for maximum sound, and the atmosphere has shifted from quiet preparation to something far more electric—anticipation hanging in the air, thick like static before a storm.

As the sun dips lower, casting golden streaks through the windows, the apartment feels alive with energy. The furniture is arranged to make room for dancing—or whatever chaos the night might bring. The drink station is well-stocked, with liquor, mixers, and neatly arranged cups, and the snack table is just begging to be raided. In the corner, you spot Yoongi, who’s now pouring himself a drink, leaning back on one of the chairs like he’s already bracing himself for the mayhem to come.

For a moment, you just stand in the doorway, taking it all in. The apartment looks completely different now—transformed from your shared, quiet sanctuary into a party-ready space. And despite the slight unease fluttering in your chest, you can’t help but smile at the thought of the night ahead.

As if on cue, the first guests begin to trickle in.

Namjoon is the first to arrive, effortlessly cool in a fitted black shirt and jeans, a bottle of whiskey in hand. He gives you a friendly nod when he steps through the door and sets the whiskey on the kitchen counter, greeting Jin with a casual handshake that turns into a hug.

“Looking good, man,” Namjoon says with a grin. “Big night, huh?”

“Yeah, we’re doing it up right,” Jin replies, his voice just a little louder than usual, a bit of that party-host enthusiasm bubbling up in him. The two exchange a few more words, and Jin motions toward you. “Hey, come on over. [Y/N], I’m sure you remember Namjoon.”

Namjoon gives you an easy smile, his presence as warm and reassuring as always. “Hey there, it’s been a while! How’s everything?”

“Good, good,” you reply, trying to keep your voice casual as you glance around the room. “Job hunting, binge watching a show, the usual.”

Namjoon laughs softly, offering a comforting smile. “I get it. Hope it’s going better for you. You’ll land something soon, I’m sure.”

You offer a small smile in return, the familiar reassurance doing a little to calm your nerves. You hope so too.

The door bursts open once more, and Hoseok enters with his exuberance, his energy practically palpable as he greets everyone. He’s always the life of the party, and tonight is no exception. “What’s up, everybody!” he announces, practically vibrating with excitement. He immediately starts giving hugs to everyone in sight, first to Jin, then Namjoon, and then you, pulling you into a bear hug that’s more playful than anything else.

“Hoseok! It’s been some time since I last saw you. Busy with work?” You look at him joyfully after he lets go of the hug.

“I know, right?” he grins, practically bouncing on his feet. “I’ve been living my best life working as a Tour Choreographer, but I had to take a small break to party with you guys. Feels like it’s been forever since I last saw you at the hot pot hang out 2 months ago!”

You laugh, the infectious nature of his enthusiasm working its magic. “Yeah, but you were prepping for Bad Bunny’s tour! You haven’t missed out on much here.”

“But, hey, I’m here now, so the party’s officially started,” Hoseok declares, winking as he turns toward the rest of the room.

The next guests to arrive are Jimin and Taehyung, walking in together. They both carry themselves with an effortless confidence that seems to make the air around them shift. Jimin, with that familiar smirk, immediately catches your attention. He doesn’t say much but his presence is felt all the same. Then there’s Taehyung, with his boxy smile as easygoing as his flirtatious reputation he apparently has on Twitch. Though, most of it is him messing around with Jimin, whatever that means.

“Hey there,” Jimin says, his voice smooth, his smirk more of a playful challenge. “I wanted to see you again so badly, Noona.”

Here we go with the formal, endearing terms to call a girl slightly older than them.

“I…Jimin, just call me by my name! Not noona!” you laugh, feeling the warmth in your cheeks from his constant teasing. “I see you’re still driving people crazy as ever,” You don’t really see Jimin often as he lives across a few cities and doesn’t come over for irl streams, but his flirty attitude is also still the same as Taehyungs’.

Taehyung, ever the playful one, leans over to Jimin, raising an eyebrow. “Are you ever free to hang with us? We’ve been wanting to go out to a fancy omakase dinner, but Seokjin keeps cockblocking.”

You laugh as you glance at Jin, who’s watching with mild amusement. “I fear as long as that man is still around and acting as my supposed manager, it may not be possible,” Jin has warned you about their scandalous behaviors, so it may be best to stay away.

As they settle in, the door opens again, and Jungkook steps in, looking effortlessly cool in a simple black hoodie and sweatpants. You’ve been knowing he’s a big name in streaming, of course, one of the earliest people Jin started collaborating with. This is your fifth time seeing him, the first being when they did Jin’s first IRL stream together at Cheesecake Factory, then the Mario Party and Mario Kart March Madness competition streams they had. Don’t even ask what this means.

Jungkook flashes you a smile that feels both familiar and comforting.

“Hi [Y/N]! I missed you!” Jungkook greets you. “Glad to see you’re still here.”

“Aw, yeah, good to see you again,” you respond, your smile a little warmer this time. You glance at Jin, who’s watching the exchange with a slight smile.

Behind Jungkook, a few more people start trickling in—Mingyu, Yugyeom, Eunwoo, and Jaehyun, all streaming housemates from Jungkook’s crew at their “97z” streamer house. They’re all friendly, and soon enough, the place is buzzing with energy as they greet everyone. It’s a mix of Jin’s college friends and a few of his more recent streamer buddies: Kim Dong-hyun, Lee Yi-kyung, Kian84, Kang Seung Yoon, etc.

From the people that are Jin’s non-streamer friends, you spot a few familiar faces: Moonbyul, Sandeul, Hani, Ken—people from your elementary school days you haven’t seen in ages. You’re genuinely grateful to see them here, especially with the unfamiliar crowd. It feels comforting to have a piece of your past here among the chaos.

Then, just as the place starts to feel like it’s reaching its peak, the door opens again.

It’s Sakura. She’s an old work colleague you’re close to, and as soon as she spots you, she beams and rushes over to greet you. “It’s been so long! I’ve missed you at work.”

You hug her tightly, laughing. “Yeah, I’ve missed you too. Glad you made it.” “I’ll be here for a bit as I gotta rest after a tough week!” “No worries! We appreciate you coming by!”

The other familiar faces follow from your core college friend group, Daisy, Joshua, and Vernon, all grinning as they spot you. “We made it!” Vernon announces, clearly ready to dive into the chaos.

And just like that, the apartment is full. Music is playing, drinks are flowing, and the room hums with life. It’s chaotic, loud, and full of strangers you’re just getting to know—and old friends you’ve been craving to catch up with.

You’re beginning to get a little restless as the night progresses, occasionally scanning the room to see if Yunjin and Wendy have arrived yet. They had promised to finally hang out, after all this time, and it felt like everything had fallen into place for tonight—finally, after all the delays, they’d be here. 

You chat with your friends and Jin’s friends, exchanging pleasantries and getting to know the people in Jin’s circle, but in the back of your mind, you’re still waiting for the familiar faces that bring a sense of ease with them.

As you linger by the door, you start to wonder if they’re even going to make it.

Just as you’re thinking it, you hear the door creak open once more, and then you see them.

Yunjin steps inside first, her outfit effortlessly chic—she’s wearing a black leather jacket over a flowy white blouse tucked into high-waisted ripped jeans, with combat boots that give her an edge. She’s holding a large gift bag, clearly for you, as she walks in with a wide grin. Behind her, Wendy steps through the door, immediately catching the attention of the room.

Wendy’s fit is on another level—her black crop top is paired with a mini skirt that highlights her toned legs, and she’s wearing thigh-high boots that make her look like she’s walked straight out of an edgy fashion magazine. She has her hair styled in loose waves, and the confidence radiating off her only makes her look even hotter. You can’t help but feel a little grateful that she’s here tonight, if only to make the energy feel more familiar.

Both of them walk toward you almost immediately, and as they approach, your smile brightens. "You two are fashionably late! I’ve missed you guys soooo much," you exclaim, throwing your arms around both of them in a quick embrace.

“Same here!” Yunjin says, pulling back with a smile. “Sorry we’re late, work’s been crazy as an assistant to the creative director at my company. But we’re here now, and we’ve got gifts!” She hands you the large gift bag, and you take it with an appreciative grin.

“Thanks! You really didn’t have to,” you say as you look inside the bag to find a beautiful necklace and the moomin keychain plushie Yunjin promised to give you so long ago. Finally made its’ way to you.

“You deserve it,” Wendy chimes in, offering you a playful wink. “Also, I’m glad we’re finally doing something fun. It’s been way too long.”

As you continue chatting, you’re interrupted by a small group that gathers around you, eager to greet the two women. Daisy, Joshua, and Vernon, of course, immediately move in to say hi, pulling them into the fold of casual banter. You step back, watching them for a second, a soft smile tugging at your lips. It feels good to have all your friends under one roof.

Then, Yunjin glances across the room, narrowing her eyes as she scans the area. "Where’s your lovely roommate who’s been looking after you?" she asks, voice teasing but still holding a note of curiosity.

Without missing a beat, you point across the room, where you can see Jin chatting animatedly with a few of his gamer friends by the glass doors that lead to the balcony. “Oh, he’s over there, talking to a few of his streaming friends,” you say, feeling the conversation shift slightly in your stomach.

“Woah, he streams? Like on Twitch? Is he big on there?”

“He’s pretty up there! It’s this new hobby he started not so long ago.”

“That’s so cool!”

While Yunjin’s interest peaks in hearing about Jin’s side hustle,  Wendy’s eyes widen when she sees him, and for just a moment, you see something in her expression shift—surprise, maybe even a little discomfort, though it’s quickly masked. She doesn’t say anything, but then you catch the look she shares with Yunjin, who suddenly gets very quiet.

You quickly try to push the awkwardness away. “Hey, go on, mingle, get some food, drinks, whatever. I’ll be over in a second,” you tell them, trying to distract yourself and them. You’re not sure why the change in energy unsettles you.

The two women nod, heading off toward the snack table, and you turn your attention to the next task at hand—making sure everything goes smoothly for the night.

But just as you’re walking toward the kitchen, you’re suddenly pulled back by a hand on your arm. It’s Yoongi.

“Hey, Yoongi. What’s up?” you ask, turning to face him.

He looks around cautiously, making sure no one’s nearby, and pulls you just far enough away so you’re out of earshot from the rest of the group.

“Y/N,” he says, his voice low. “I’m not the type to get into drama, but I’m curious. Why did you invite her?”

You frown, a little confused at what he’s even referring to. “What the fuck are you talking about?”

Yoongi gestures vaguely in Wendy’s direction, where she’s now talking to Jin, her head tilted as she laughs at something he said. “That’s… his ex girlfriend,” he mutters, clearly unsettled by it.

Your stomach drops. “What?” you whisper, at a total loss for words.

“You didn’t know?” Yoongi’s voice is almost incredulous, like it’s impossible that you wouldn’t have known.

“No! I—I didn’t know,” you hiss, trying to keep your voice low. “Wendy and Jin…they were together?”

Yoongi’s lips press together in a tight line. “Yeah. They were. A while ago, but... still.” He shakes his head, clearly frustrated. “But hold on, you really didn’t know? This is fucking insane…”

You shake your head, your stomach twisting into knots. No, you hadn’t known. Not a clue. You’d known Wendy since your sophomore year of college, meeting her in an accounting class of all places. She’d been your friend ever since—reliable, kind, and always there when you needed her. But relationships? That was never something she flaunted. And with the way Instagram’s algorithm worked these last few years, you’d missed any subtle hints she might have dropped.

“No, I didn’t,” you mutter, your voice steady but laced with defensiveness. “I’m not exactly the type to stalk people’s love lives, especially on social media. I’ve been too busy worrying about my own shit, so… sorry.”

Yoongi’s face softens, realizing he’s been a little too harsh. “Sorry. It’s just… Jin was kind of broken up about it. He did like her, but they ended things because they just weren’t working out. Wendy wasn’t happy. Stuff like sex wasn’t really fulfilling for her, she wanted to be with him more, but he was always working. He loves his job at Riot so it was always his priority. And eventually, they grew apart. It wasn’t messy, though. They both agreed it was for the best.” He pauses, searching for the right words. “She was still important to him, and it kinda killed his confidence for a while.”

You feel your chest tighten. Wendy was his ex. Wendy was that ex he mentioned. The ex that he learned about more sexual stuff with.

“Jin finally moved on after starting his Twitch streaming hustle, but you know, shit always stays like that in your heart somewhere,” Yoongi continues, rubbing the back of his neck. “But I’ll stop pushing. I just wanted to make sure you knew before you…” He trails off, looking back over his shoulder toward the crowd, where Wendy is laughing with Jin.

You let out a long sigh, the weight of it all settling in. The complicated side of Jin that you didn’t know about, and this now tangled web between your friendship with Wendy and what you’ve shared with him.

“What are you implying?” you whisper, barely audible.

Yoongi looks at you, his dark eyes searching yours, trying to convey something without saying it outright. And then it hits you—he’s not just talking about Jin and Wendy. He’s talking about you. About the late-night streams, the flirty banter, the way you and Jin have been dancing around each other lately. He’s talking about the possibility of feelings—real feelings—creeping in where they shouldn’t.

Your face flushes, and you quickly shake your head, as if trying to physically dispel the thought. No. Absolutely not. Whatever little thoughts you’ve had about Jin were born out of loneliness, boredom, maybe even a touch of curiosity—but that’s it. This thing between you two? It’s just a fun way to make money. A distraction. Nothing more.

You don’t like Jin. You can’t like Jin. Yoongi’s gaze doesn’t waver, his expression serious but tinged with something almost sympathetic. “You know what I’m talking about,” he says, his voice low. “But for the sake of Jin—and out of respect for you—I can’t say it out loud.”

You swallow hard, your throat suddenly dry. Of course you know what he’s talking about. The late-night streams, the teasing banter, the way Jin’s voice seems to linger in your mind long after the camera turns off. But it’s just work, right? A way to make some extra cash, to fill the void until you land another corporate job. It’s not supposed to mean anything. It can’t mean anything.

Maybe you really need to separate yourself from whatever insane feelings or thoughts have been sprouting in your head over the past few months, you think, gripping the edge of the counter to steady yourself. Those good, mind-numbing orgasms? That’s just work. Don’t forget that. It’s transactional. It’s temporary. It’s not real.

But even as you repeat the words to yourself, they feel hollow, like a mantra you’re trying too hard to believe.

“I need some air,” you mutter, more to yourself than to Yoongi. He nods, his expression unreadable, and you slip away from the conversation, weaving through the crowd until you reach the center of the party. The music is louder here, the laughter brighter, but it all feels distant, like you’re watching it through a foggy window.

Out of the corner of your eye, you see Jin signaling to you, holding up a shot glass with that familiar grin of his. Normally, you’d smile back, maybe even tease him about how many he’s already had. But tonight, you can’t bring yourself to look at him. Instead, you grab a berry cherry limeade BuzzBall from the table and head straight for the balcony, your heart pounding in your chest.

The cool night air hits you as soon as you step outside, and you take a deep breath, letting it fill your lungs. You lean against the railing, the city lights stretching out before you, and take a long swig of the BuzzBall. The sweetness is almost too much, but the alcohol buzz spreads almost immediately. This is a distraction, something to focus on besides the mess in your head.

You look out at the stars, at the other apartments across the way. The lights flicker from behind windows, and for a second, it feels like you’re completely alone. In your own space, with no one else’s expectations weighing on you. But even then, you can’t shake the nagging feeling in your chest. You try to force it out—tell yourself you’re overthinking, that this is just another night. But the tension still clings to you, wrapping itself around your thoughts. The same dread and confusion you felt with Mingi, but now somehow it feels more twisted. Because you know, deep down, this is different. Jin isn’t like Mingi. Not at all. And that’s what scares you.

You think back to those weeks before when you were drowning in heartbreak after Mingi’s betrayal. You remember how desperate you felt, how everything seemed so out of your control. 

Just when you thought you’d moved on from the Mingi cheating disaster, thanks in no small part to Jin helping you forget, here you are again—caught in another complicated web of feelings you never asked for.

Back to square one.

Get a grip.

Before you can spiral any further, the sliding door behind you opens, and you tense, not ready to face anyone. You don’t need to turn around to know who it is, but you do anyway. But when Namjoon steps out onto the balcony, his presence is surprisingly calming. He gives you a warm, quiet smile.

“Hey,” he says softly, his deep voice carrying a note of concern. “You okay?”

You let out a humorless laugh, still staring out at the city. “I’m just… grabbing some air. It’s stuffy in there. Do I look not okay?”

Namjoon steps closer, leaning against the railing beside you. “Not really. But I figured I’d ask anyway.”

You glance at him, his calm demeanor a stark contrast to the chaos in your head. “I was thinking about how shitty my love life is,” you admit, your voice barely above a whisper. “I need to swear off any potential relationships.”

Namjoon raises an eyebrow, a small smile playing on his lips. “That bad, huh?”

You shrug, taking another sip of your drink. “Just… tired of the drama. Tired of feeling like I’m always one step away from messing everything up.”

He nods, his gaze thoughtful. “Sometimes it’s not about avoiding the mess. It’s about figuring out what’s worth cleaning up.”

You freeze for a moment, his words hitting closer to home than you’d like. But you quickly shake it off, not ready to unpack that just yet. “Yeah, well, I think I’ve done enough cleaning up for one lifetime.”

Namjoon chuckles softly, and for a moment, the weight on your chest feels a little lighter. But you’re careful not to say too much. Namjoon is sharp—too sharp. If you let your guard down, he’ll figure out exactly what’s going on with you and Jin, and that’s a conversation you’re not ready to have.

Not now. Maybe not ever. "Well, then let me help you. You wanna hang out sometime next week?"

 "Huh?"

You blink at Namjoon, caught off guard. "Hang out? Like… just us?"

He shrugs, taking a sip from his drink. "Yeah. Why not?"

Your brain short-circuits for a second, still stuck on the conversation you just had—your messy love life, the lingering thoughts of Jin, the complications of everything happening in your life right now. And now Namjoon, with his quiet confidence and perceptive nature, is offering you an out. A distraction.

“I mean, I guess,” you say hesitantly, swirling the drink in your cup. “What’d you have in mind?”

Namjoon smirks slightly, tilting his head in thought. “Dinner? A museum? A bookstore? Maybe something that doesn’t involve people getting wasted off Buzzballs?”

You huff out a laugh. “That might be a nice change of pace.”

“Good,” he says, his voice warm, reassuring. “Then it’s a plan.”

You don’t know why, but there’s something grounding about Namjoon in this moment. Maybe it’s the way he listens, how he doesn’t push, just offers you a space to breathe. You haven’t had that in a while.

But before you can say anything else, the balcony door swings open again, and Jin steps outside.

The air shifts instantly.

Jin’s gaze flickers between the two of you, something unreadable crossing his face before he covers it up with a lazy smirk. “What’s this? You sneaking off with my roommate, Joon?”

Namjoon, completely unfazed, leans against the railing with an easy grin. “She needed air. I’m just keeping her company.”

Jin hums, stepping closer. He’s got a drink in his hand, the condensation dripping down his fingers as he tilts his head at you. His tone is playful, but there’s something in his eyes that you can’t quite place. “Didn’t take you for a party-escape type, Princess.”

Your grip tightens around your drink at the nickname. You haven’t heard him call you that outside of the streams before. Or even outside this home where only you two live in. You shoot him a look, forcing a smirk. “Didn’t take you for the type to notice when I’m not around.”

Jin’s smirk falters for a fraction of a second before he recovers, chuckling under his breath. “Please. I always notice.”

Your breath catches, but before you can process it, Namjoon clears his throat, setting his cup down on the railing. “Well, I should probably get back inside. We’ll talk later, yeah?”

You nod, watching as he heads back in, leaving you alone with Jin.

The silence that follows is thick.

Jin leans back against the railing next to you, staring out at the city. "So. You and Namjoon, huh?"

You scoff. “Don’t start.”

He grins. “What? I’m just curious.”

“No, you’re fishing.”

Jin chuckles, but there’s something behind it—something almost hesitant. He takes a slow sip of his drink before turning to face you fully. “Do you like him?”

You freeze. Of all the questions, you weren’t expecting that.

Your first instinct is to deflect, to make a joke, to push the attention away from whatever this is. But for some reason, the way Jin is looking at you—open, unreadable, waiting—makes your throat go dry.

You swallow. “I don’t know,” you admit, voice softer than you intended. “But it doesn’t really matter, does it?”

Jin studies you for a long moment, his expression unreadable. Then, he exhales, shaking his head with a small laugh. “Yeah. I guess not.”

But the way he says it doesn’t feel like he believes it.

And neither do you.

Jin’s presence lingers beside you as the two of you step back inside, the warm air of the party wrapping around you like a heavy cloak. The energy in the room is still buzzing—music playing, drinks flowing, laughter echoing from different corners of the apartment. But despite the crowd, your eyes immediately land on them.

Yunjin and Wendy, standing near the kitchen island with Hoseok, Jungkook, Jimin, Taehyung, Yoongi, and Namjoon all gathered around.

The moment Wendy spots you, her brows furrow slightly. “Where have you been for the last half hour?” she asks, tilting her head, curiosity laced in her tone.

And once again, it feels a bit hard to breathe. A bit hard to look at her.

The weight of Yoongi’s earlier revelation presses down on your chest like a brick. That’s his ex. That’s your friend. She dated Jin. She slept with Jin. She knows what he’s like behind closed doors. She knew before you ever did.

You force a smile, gripping your drink a little tighter. “Just needed some air,” you answer, voice even. “Namjoon came out to check on me just before Jin showed up.”

Jin hums beside you, taking a slow sip of his drink as if the conversation isn’t affecting him at all. But you feel it—the way his body tenses just slightly beside you and his usual playfulness is suddenly more subdued.

Wendy nods, but there’s something unreadable in her expression as she glances between you and Jin. “Well, good timing,” she says, her tone light but observant. “We were just about to take shots. You in?”

A distraction.

You exhale, finally forcing yourself to meet her gaze. The feelings swirling inside of you—confusion, unease, maybe even the smallest hint of bitterness—don’t disappear, but you shove them down.

“Yeah,” you say, lifting your cup. “I could use one.”

Jin watches you for a moment longer before flashing one of his signature grins. “Make it two for me.”

And just like that, the conversation shifts, the moment buried under the burn of alcohol and the chaos of the party. But deep down, the questions remain.

What does Wendy really think about all this?

And why does Jin keep looking at you like that?

The party is in full swing, and the energy has shifted into something livelier. In the middle of the living room, Jin and Namjoon are setting up a beer pong table, arranging the plastic cups in neat triangles at either end, filling them up with cheap beer. Yunjin, Wendy, Jungkook, Hoseok, and Yoongi have gathered around, some leaning against the counters, others lounging on the couch, watching with amused anticipation.

You’re feeling a little looser now, the initial unease from earlier beginning to wear off thanks to the alcohol. And maybe, just maybe, you need something to really push these thoughts out of your head. So when Namjoon asks for volunteers, your hand shoots up without thinking.

“I’m in,” you say, stepping forward.

Jin snorts beside you. “You?”

You shoot him a glare. “Yes, me.”

He raises an eyebrow, arms crossed as he tilts his head at you. “No offense, Y/N, but you’re not a great drinker.” Everyone laughs, which makes you scoff. “Excuse me? I can drink just fine.”

“You get tipsy off one soju bottle.”

“That was one time!”

Jin smirks, clearly enjoying this too much. “Yeah, one time last month. Pretty recent, don’t you think?”

The others chuckle at your expense, and you narrow your eyes at him, determined now. “You know what? You play against me then.”

His grin widens. “Ohhh, so we’re back to our childhood rivalry, huh?”

“You started it.”

“Oh no, you started it by thinking you could win.”

You roll your eyes, but before you can fire back, Namjoon steps up beside you, a relaxed smile on his face. “I’ll be her drinking partner,” he says casually.

Jin’s expression falters for just a second. “What? That’s cheating.”

Namjoon raises his hands in mock innocence. “I’m just here for moral support. Plus, you said she’s a lightweight, right? I’m helping balance it out.”

You grin, nudging Namjoon. “See? Teamwork.” You high-five the tall, buff man.

Jin clicks his tongue, clearly annoyed. “Whatever. I’m still kicking your ass.”

And so the game begins.

—

Though turns out, you’re actually pretty good at beer pong.

You weren’t sure if it was the confidence boost from earlier, the competitive streak inside you, or just pure dumb luck, but shot after shot, you manage to land the ball in Jin’s cups. The crowd hypes you up every time you score, and you can feel Jin getting more and more agitated.

But, of course, Jin is better. Annoyingly so.

Every time you think you’re about to get ahead, he evens the score, sinking shots with ease. He’s in his element—relaxed, confident, smirking every time he throws the ball. And the worst part? He knows how to rile you up.

“Wow,” Jin muses as he lands another shot effortlessly, arms stretching behind his head. “I almost feel bad, you were doing so well in the beginning.”

“Don’t get cocky,” you grumble, grabbing the ping pong ball.

“Too late.”

You narrow your eyes at him, fingers tightening around the ball. Okay. You need to distract him. You need something to throw him off so you’re back to winning.

And then…an idea pops into your head. A very reckless, impulsive idea, thanks to the alcohol.

You shoot Jin an innocent look, twirling the ball between your fingers. “Hey, Jin?”

He hums, not even looking up, too busy lining up his next shot.

“Can you tell me how you know Wendy?”

Jin freezes. His fingers slip ever so slightly, and his shot, which would’ve been perfect, veers off course and misses.

Bullseye.

Yoongi, who’s been watching from the side, lets out a sharp breath and shakes his head. He is definitely regretting ever telling you about his ex earlier.

Jin blinks at you, caught off guard. His face doesn’t immediately betray any emotions, but you can tell he’s scrambling to figure out why you’d ask. You see the way his brain works behind his eyes, piecing together the fact that you know.

Wendy, who had been sipping her drink and conversing with Hoseok, suddenly stiffens at the mention of her name. She glances at you, then at Jin, her expression unreadable.

Jin clears his throat. “We went out,” he admits, tone steady. “And we ended thing mutually, so I guess we’re just friends now.”

He turns slightly, nodding toward Wendy, silently asking for confirmation.

She meets his gaze and nods back, a small, tight smile on her lips. “Yeah. Just friends.”

There’s a beat of silence. You don’t know why, but it feels heavier than it should be.

Jin shifts his attention back to you. “Didn’t know you two were acquainted too.”

You lick your lips, feeling something weird settle in your stomach. “Yeah. Wendy and I have been friends for years.”

Jin watches you carefully, his fingers gripping the ping-pong ball just a little tighter before he tosses it in the air and catches it again. There’s something unreadable in his expression—like he’s waiting for you to slip, to give yourself away.

“I don’t know how you found out,” he says casually, rolling the ball between his fingers. “Is the fact that I dated one of your friends bothering you?”

He shoots his shot. The ball arcs smoothly through the air, landing perfectly in your cup. Of course, it does.

You pick up the ball and twirl it between your fingers, forcing yourself to keep your voice even. “Of course not,” you say simply, aiming for your next throw. “Why would it?”

Jin tilts his head, smirking like he doesn’t quite believe you. “No reason. Just thought you might have opinions on it.”

Your grip tightens slightly, but you don’t let it show. Instead, you launch the ball toward his cup. It bounces once, then sinks inside.

You meet his gaze, holding it. “It’s your life, Jin. Your past. Not mine. And not up to me to judge you on that.”

He stares at you for a beat too long, then chuckles under his breath, shaking his head. “Right,” he mutters, lifting his drink and taking a slow sip. “Not yours.”

But the way he says it makes something twist in your stomach.

And from the sidelines, Yoongi lets out a quiet sigh, shaking his head like he’s already regretting ever opening his mouth.

Your fingers tighten around the plastic cup, the cold condensation pressing against your palm as you try to make sense of what you’re feeling. The truth is… you don’t know.

Sleeping with your friend’s ex-boyfriend? That alone should have you feeling guilty. But then there’s the fact that Jin isn’t just some guy—he’s your long-time childhood rival, the person who’s been tangled up in your life in ways no one else ever has. He’s always been there, challenging you, frustrating you, pushing you to your limits. And now? Now you’re living together, sleeping together, making money off your bodies while pretending none of it means anything.

It shouldn’t mean anything.

But standing here, playing this stupid game with him, feeling his eyes on you like he’s waiting for something—some kind of reaction—it all suddenly feels very real. Too real.

The alcohol is starting to work its way into Jin’s system, loosening the sharp edges of his usual self-control. He walks toward you, his gaze darkening with something unreadable. And then, just as you’re about to take your next shot, he whispers it.

"Are you jealous?"

Your fingers slip, and the ball veers off course, bouncing off the rim.

Shit.

The surrounding group erupts in laughter at your failed shot, but all you can focus on is Jin, who’s watching you with that infuriatingly smug expression as he goes back to his side. Like he knows he hit a nerve. Like he’s enjoying this way too much.

Namjoon hands you a cup, a silent reminder that you have to drink now, and you take a slow sip, letting the bitterness coat your tongue.

You set the cup down, leveling Jin with a look. “Why would you assume that?”

He tilts his head, like he’s actually considering it. “Dunno. Just because you brought her up when you could’ve said anything else.”

You let out a humorless chuckle, shaking your head. “Jin, we’re living together, but I know my own boundaries.”

His smirk falters for just a second. It’s quick—almost too quick—but you catch it.

He tosses the ball absentmindedly in his hand, his smirk still lingering but not quite reaching his eyes. Is the alcohol getting to him now? Or is it his own jealousy of you being alone with his friend? Either way, it’s loosening the usual filter between his thoughts and his words.

"You know your own boundaries?" he echoes, tilting his head slightly. "That’s funny. Thought we blurred a few of those while living together."

Your stomach flips, but you mask it with a scoff. “Oh, please. It’s not like—”

But the words catch in your throat before you can stop them. Not like you two sleep together? Not like you let him fuck you on camera? Not like you think about him more than you should?

Jin’s eyes widen slightly. He catches the slip before anyone else does. Shit.

You’re about to say something—maybe backtrack, maybe pretend it was nothing—but before you can, Jin moves.

In an instant, he closes the distance between you, his hand clamping over your mouth, muffling any potential disaster that could spill from your lips.

“Alright, that’s enough drinks for you,” he says quickly, his voice unnaturally light, like he’s trying to play it off.

The others blink in confusion, Yoongi narrowing his eyes as if already piecing things together.

“What the hell, Jin?” Jungkook laughs. “Where are you taking her?”

“She needs to cool off in her room,” Jin calls over his shoulder as he practically drags you away from the table, his grip firm but careful. You struggle slightly, letting out a muffled protest against his palm, but it’s no use—he’s already guiding you down the hallway.

Everyone that was watching the game looks at you two confused, but then go on to continue playing, now with Jungkook and Hoseok playing against Yunjin and Wendy, who is still stuck on the two of you being a bit weird. Before Wendy has time to question it to Yunjin, Jimin and Taehyung show up to watch them play.

On your end, the door slams shut.

Then—

Your back is against the wall.

Jin’s body is pressed against yours, his palm still covering your mouth, his other hand braced against the wall beside your head.

You freeze, eyes locking onto his, heart hammering against your ribs.

The air between you is thick, electric. His chest rises and falls, breath warm against your cheek. His eyes—usually so playful and teasing—are dark, serious. Frustrated.

You make an indignant noise behind his palm, glaring at him.

Jin exhales, running his tongue over his bottom lip before leaning in closer, so close that you feel his breath ghost over your skin.

He finally releases you, and you stumble slightly, glaring at him as you wipe your mouth. “Are you insane?”

Jin exhales sharply, running a hand through his hair. “Me? I just saved your ass from exposing everything in front of our friends!”

Your breath is still uneven from being manhandled into the room, your pulse racing for an entirely different reason now. You cross your arms, trying to steady yourself. “I wasn’t going to say anything—”

“You were,” he cuts in, his tone lower, more serious now. “You almost did.”

Uh, well…

You can’t even argue with that. He’s right. You did almost say something. And now, you’re not sure if it was just the alcohol or something deeper clawing its way to the surface.

You suck in a breath, staring at him. “You didn't need to drag me away, though” you accuse, voice coming out shakier than you intended.

“You were about to say some dumb shit that neither of us need getting out,” he shoots back, still keeping you caged against the wall. “What the hell was that?”

Your face burns. “Maybe I was tipsy! I don't know!”

Jin exhales harshly, tilting his head back like he’s trying to gather patience. “Jesus,” he mutters.

You swallow, trying to ignore the way your skin is burning under his proximity. He hasn’t moved. His hands are still caging you in, his body still too close, and—god, why does he smell so good?

Is that a scent of fig tree with a cedarand woody note? Wait, no, you gotta focus. You meet his gaze, pulse erratic. “Are you mad?”

Jin lets out a short, humorless laugh. “No shit.”

Oh no.

Silence.

Neither of you move. Neither of you look away.

And then—

His eyes flicker down to your lips.

Your breath catches.

"I'm sorry," you say. Jin’s jaw tightens, his frustration evident in the sharp rise and fall of his chest. His hands are still braced against the wall, caging you in, but his anger—hot and immediate—has shifted into something else entirely.

Something deeper.

His eyes flicker down to your lips again. Just for a second. But you catch it.

You feel it.

Your throat bobs, and you suddenly can’t decide if it’s the alcohol making your head light or the fact that Jin is looking at you like that.

"I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to almost expose us," you repeat, softer this time. “I was just being stupid.”

Jin exhales through his nose, his gaze lingering on you, the sharp edges of his irritation dulling just slightly. He wants to keep being mad, wants to keep drilling it into your head that you were reckless, but…

You look too apologetic. Too sincere.

Too fucking cute.

The slight flush on your cheeks, the way your lips are slightly parted, the way your body feels small under him—it’s enough to make his resolve crack.

And maybe it’s the alcohol lowering his inhibitions.

Maybe it’s the past few months of unspoken tension between you two.

Maybe it’s the fact that he can still taste the way your body feels around him, that the memory of your breathless moans isn’t something he can just shake off like he does with meaningless encounters.

Maybe it’s all of that.

Or maybe Jin just wants to shut you up. Erase mentions of his past with thoughts of the present.

And so—without a second thought, without warning—he kisses you.

Leaving you in complete shock.

His lips crash onto yours, his hand moving from the wall to cup the side of your face, fingers curling into your hair as he tilts his head and deepens the kiss instantly.

You gasp against him, your body stiffening for just a second before melting into the heat of him. His mouth is hot, insistent, and when he presses in closer, slotting himself flush against you, you feel it—the tension between you finally snapping into something undeniable.

Your hands grip at his shirt, tugging him impossibly closer, and Jin groans low against your mouth, the sound vibrating through you and straight to your core.

Fuck.

This isn’t like before.

This isn’t the mechanical, transactional chemistry you two have in front of the camera.

Or the casual closeness you have as friends in this home.

This is different.

This is raw. Messy. Real.

And that terrifies you.

Just as Jin’s lips part from yours, your phone vibrates in your back pocket, the sudden noise cutting through the hazy warmth of the moment.

You jerk away from him, breathless, pressing a shaky hand to his chest to create some distance. His brows furrow in confusion, lips still slightly swollen from the kiss, but you’re already fishing out your phone.

An unknown number flashes across the screen.

Your heart pounds for an entirely different reason now.

You swallow, trying to steady yourself before answering. The muffled bass from the party thrums behind the bedroom door, and you pray the caller doesn’t hear it.

“Hello?” you answer, your voice only slightly uneven.

“Hi, is this Y/N?”

You straighten at the sound of the polished, professional voice. “Uh—yes, this is she. How can I help you?”

“Hi, this is Gia, Content Marketing Director at Netflix,” the woman says smoothly. “The team and I discussed our decision, and I didn’t want to wait any longer to inform you. I’m calling to officially offer you the role.”

Your stomach drops.

“I—” You suck in a breath, gripping the phone tighter. “That’s… amazing. Thank you.”

Gia chuckles lightly, her tone warm. “Of course. We’d love to set up a time early next week to go over the details through a phone call. Would Monday at 10 AM work for you?”

Your thoughts are spinning, but somehow, you manage to ground yourself enough to say, “Yes! Monday at 10 works perfectly.”

Jin, still standing close, mouths, Who is it?

You shake your head quickly, unsure of what to say, unsure of how to process what’s happening.

Oh my god.

You just got the job.

Oh god.

“Perfect,” Gia says. “We’ll talk more then. Congratulations again, Y/N.”

“Thank you so much,” you manage, voice slightly breathless. The call ends with a polite goodbye, and you’re left standing there, phone still clutched in your hand, stunned.

Jin tilts his head, still waiting for an answer. “Well?”

You lift your gaze to meet his, wide-eyed and almost disbelieving.

“I just got the job offer at Netflix.”

And just like that—with a new situation arising, everything changes.

- -

a/n: i have no long notes to add. except REMEMBER TO PRE-SAVE AND PRE-ORDER JIN'S 2ND ALBUM ECHO, NOW !! but anyways, that was a crazy ending to this chapter. there's only one more left and that will be released the day before jin's album so look forward to that!!!

➸ let me know what you think OR join the taglist for future works! ➸ check out my masterlist for other fics I have made

[guudak]

andante, andante

[epilogue] - allegro

click here to read the original fic i.e. the rest of it as this is only the epilogue chapter. Also cross-posted this on AO3.

pairing: jungkook / oc genre + tags: college au, f2l, alcohol, pining chapter warnings: mentions of / direct references to sex but no smut or descriptions of it. word count: 4,490 The aftermath of your best friend singing that ABBA song, clumsily flirting with you and then drunkenly professing his love to you multiple times in the same night.

And honestly? It doesn’t take long. 

Your first date you both labelled officially as a couple had been bowling. Which you, by the way, had royally sucked at, but it at least gave you an excuse to ask him for a demonstration (i.e. a chance to have him pressed against you while he guided you during your turn) - sly, but clearly not sly enough since he called you out on it. Subtle had never really been your thing, but at least he’d played along. No, you had always been a master of the art of un-subtlety. You never had any shame in saying things without thinking too thoroughly or (respectfully) staring, as well as being the one to make the first move, owing to the amount of flings and almost-relationships you had prior to Jungkook. 

He’s always been handsome. Truthfully, he isn’t your conventional type. As in, not the typical guy you used to go for, but you’ve always known he was handsome. But back then, it hadn’t been in a butterflies-in-your-stomach kind of way, but in an objective sense, because if you uploaded a photo of him on prettyscale.com it would have given him a 90% but if you did the rating yourself you’d give him 100. Now that he’s yours you could stare at him all you want without it being weird and he’s a total dreamboat, and you could finally say it. You don’t hide it from him either because you remind him every chance you get, and you revel in the satisfaction from the way his cheeks tinge pink when he notices you giving him the eyes. 

The thrill of seeing him blush under your gaze never gets old. You catch him trying to suppress his shy smile when he notices, pretending to focus on something else entirely, but the corners of his lips betray him every time.

“You’re not subtle, at all.”

“Can you blame me?” you shoot back, your tone light and teasing, “With a face like that, I’m just appreciating the view. And I like seeing you all blushing and flustered.”

“I’m not blushing,” he mutters as if offended, but the grin he hides says otherwise.

Though the dynamics of your relationship have shifted, the essence of your connection remains beautifully familiar. He’s still your best friend, only now, there's a deeper layer of intimacy woven into the fabric of your bond. It feels like a gentle, inevitable progression of the love that has always simmered quietly between you. There's a newfound softness in the way you look at each other, a tenderness in the touch of your hands that find their way together instinctively, drawn by a magnetic pull when you're close. He’s always been there, and maybe, you have since concluded, a constant is what you want. What you need. 

Over time, you’ve come to realise that Jungkook's steadiness is like a gentle glow that doesn't rush to overpower, but instead slowly illuminates what surrounds it. His reliability isn't loud or showy, and it doesn't need to be. It's in the quiet moments, the consistent support, the unspoken understanding. With him, there is no dramatic shift in your world, just the comforting assurance that no matter where you turn, he is there, like a lighthouse guiding you back to shore. And in the chaotic blur of your own life and your thoughts, his enduring presence has become something grounding, anchoring you back when your head is in the clouds.

When it comes to your love life, you've always kept things simple, governed by a single, steadfast rule: the six-month timeline before saying the L-word. That monumental declaration wouldn't escape your lips before month six. That has always been your rule. A timeline not just drawn from caution but from a lack of conviction about what it truly felt to love someone in the all-encompassing way that other people seem to romanticise. Your previous relationships, hovering close to that mark, dissolved before the pivotal sixth month. But you stand by your belief in the saying that when you truly know, you just know, without any second-guessing.

You had been upfront with Jungkook about this from the very beginning, laying your cards on the table with the kind of transparency that leaves no room for misinterpretation. He took it gracefully, in that dignified way of his because that’s just how he is but you knew he’d understand. With that stoic composure of his that masked the depth of his feelings - feelings that had matured over time, unlike yours that were still forming, and still tentative. 

He’d confessed his love for you again one moonlit evening on the beach. It was the midst of winter, and the air was bitterly cold as you both walked back from a party. On a whim, you had taken a detour, ending up by the seafront. Each of you held a handle of a grocery bag, the one that carried your leftover bottles of gin and toffee vodka from the night. The waves crashed nearby, their rhythm mingling with the crisp sea breeze and the sand crunching beneath your footsteps. His breath formed little clouds in the frosty air, and you could see the shine in his eyes reflect in the moonlight. You’d huddled closer as both of you sat side by side on the sand.

“I’ve loved you for a long time,” he said, his voice carrying over the waves. “You’ve been my best friend even longer than I’ve loved you. But I love you to the point I would have been content if we’d never changed a thing - anything to have you around in my life and seeing you happy, even if it was with someone else. But being here with you now, like this, is more than I could have ever hoped for.” His words were as raw and vast as the ocean before you, and surrounded by the echo of waves and winter’s chill, you felt a warmth that only he could kindle. His words were as sincere as the first time, but this time clarified, unlike his drunken confession that he barely remembered, but still heavy with the weight of emotion he had harboured for so long. But with it came a gentle reassurance: he didn’t expect, nor did he need, an immediate reciprocation. “And I know you don’t feel that way about me. But I’m here, no matter what it is you feel towards me. I’m happy just being with you.” 

You’d melted at that. You gave his hand a squeeze, interlocking your fingers with his. “Jungkook, being your best friend is one of the easiest things in the world. What I feel for you, sometimes it confuses me, but whatever it is … and I know I’m not fully there as you are yet. But it’s real, and it’s deep, and it’s growing each day. I’m getting there.” Your words had hung between you, a tethered promise in the making. 

You’d known he was content to wait, giving you the space to let your feelings blossom naturally, unforced and genuine. It had been this patience, this unwavering steadiness of his love, that touched you deeply, challenging every preconceived notion you held about love and its mysterious timeline.

.

“I think I have feelings for you,” you tell him one evening, as you both lay sprawled across his bed, one of his playlists softly playing in the background. His room is dimly lit, the glow of his lamp spilling a warm amber. The ambient lamp was a recent addition he bought since you were spending more time in his room and him being familiar with your spite for overhead lighting. 

Jungkook blinks, taken aback by your suddenness. “What made you reach that conclusion?”

“Well,” you start. “I can say I like a ploughmans sandwich, and I can also say I really like a ploughmans sandwich, and I know what that feels like, but I can’t exactly say I have feelings for a ploughmans sandwich, you know? And what I feel, I know I like you more than just really liking you.” 

His eyes soften as he processes your words, the corners of his mouth curling into a hesitant smile. 

“You’re serious?” he asks, his voice a mixture of hope and surprise.

“I am,” you affirm. “It's different with you. You're not just comfort food. You’re the homemade kind but you’re just better, better than a sandwich I impulsively make just because it’s my favourite and it's 2 A.M. and I need something. Does that make sense?”

He laughs softly, his initial shock giving way to a warmth that radiates from his eyes. 

“It makes perfect sense.” He reaches across to squeeze your hand. It’s a sweet, genuine moment, wholesome in its simplicity. Jungkook is a touchy lover. Yet, you noticed how sentimentality always seemed to kindle a spark of desire in him, a stirring deep within that brought a slightly more insistent touch to his hands and a need in him to take your clothes off. This had been a pattern - a very amusing pattern you’ve noticed in him.

“Ugh, you’re so handsy.” You roll your eyes but the bells of your laughter give you away while he pulls the edge of your shorts. But with him it never took much for you to be persuaded, charming and handsy as he is. His fingers linger with playful intention, tracing a line so light and teasing along your waist, that it has your back arching to have him closer to you.

“Behave,” you murmur, even as your voice and your body betray you. His grin widens, eyes glinting. 

“I'm trying,” he says, his voice low, but not exerting any effort to sound convincing.

You draw him in, giving him a kiss that was deep and profound. And for the second time during that evening, you lift your shift over your head. 

.

You thought you knew him well, but soon you began to notice the little things. Jungkook, though sweet, showed his competitive and mischievous sense of humour more after you started dating. It was like (as said by Shrek) peeling the many layers of an onion and uncovering the deeper facets of his personality (except, of course, Jungkook isn’t an ogre). At the indoor crazy golf course, his modesty disappeared and he delighted in teasing you whenever you missed a shot, suggesting a scoring system where points were awarded for missed holes instead of successful ones. Of course you hit his ankle with your club after that but despite his playful jabs, it was difficult to resist his charm.

When it approaches the fifth month you begin to question your timeline. The pace at which you caught feelings for him, and the depth you’re plunging into, is admittedly terrifying. Despite you approaching this relationship with an open-mind, it’s a sobering and an almost embarrassing realisation. What is it that you’re scared of? That’s the question that’s been bearing down on your mind.

You’ve been invited for drinks at the beach in the evening. A friend of a mutual friend’s birthday, of whom you couldn’t remember their name but assume it’s the guy wearing the glittery party hat and sash that says Birthday Bitch on it. It’s unlikely Jungkook could make it tonight as he has a deadline due at the end of the week, but promised he’ll come down later if he inevitably becomes sick of staring at his computer screen. In the meantime, you try to find familiar faces. 

You spot Yerim, sitting criss-crossed and staring at the sea. Her hair is slicked-back into a ponytail, no longer the bleach blonde you’re so familiar with, instead a lovely sheen of black, which is definitely a change. In the time you’ve known her she’s never had her natural hair, always dyeing it, but she’s just as pretty as she’s always been. It’s been a while since you last spoke to her but she greets you warmly, standing from the sand and dusting herself off to pull you into a hug when you endeavour for her eye contact. 

You talk to each other about many things, catching up with what you both missed from each other’s lives. Truth be told, you stopped talking as much after her and Jungkook broke up. When they distanced from each other, you saw Yerim around less and less. 

She’s on her fourth can of beer, and her face is a warm flush. “I miss having him around, you know,” she admits later on. “That’s probably the main thing. Not the gifts, or the attention, or the sex. Just him. And I never properly said thank you … to you. I know how close you were to him and I know you distanced from each other on purpose when I dated him.”

“Well, would have made it easier than having a conversation with you telling me to fuck off, you know. But I get it. I do.”

You had done it out of respect for her, and her relationship with Jungkook. You had told him that you couldn’t be with him alone like you used to, and if you did spend time together, other friends would be present if Yerim wasn’t around. You could tell at the time he was a little upset, but ultimately could see your reasoning. It made sense. He invested a lot in his and Yerim’s relationship. He wanted to make it work, so badly, but she broke it off. 

Yerim shifts uncomfortably, opening her mouth as if to speak, then closing it again. She looks like she’s summoning the courage to say something, and you have a sinking feeling you know what it is. 

“Are you and Jungkook together now?” 

And there it is.

“Only for about five months,” you tell her. You’re honest about it, you owe her that much. 

She nods slowly. “Did he ask you out?”

“Uh … well. We kind of both did, in a way. He was tipsy, then the messy, awkward stuff happened where he tried to avoid me for weeks and couldn't look me in the eye, etcetera, etcetera, and then I confronted him about it. Then I thought, we’re already friends anyway so why not? And here we are.”

You exchange a knowing look, then share a small, relieved laugh.

“That’s really great,” Yerim finally says. “I mean it.” Her smile reaches her eyes, and the expression on her face is all soft lines, free from malice or hidden jealousy. It’s what you’ve always admired her for, and why Jungkook was drawn to her in the first place. She’s a kind person, not just seeing, but finding the good in circumstances and in people. When she broke up with Jungkook, he was devastated and turned to you for comfort. It took him time to heal, because he just couldn’t understand where he went wrong. 

“Yerim…” you begin, nerves tightening your throat while she looks at you with quiet expectation. “Why did you break up with Jungkook?” 

To your surprise, she giggles.“To fully answer that I have to go through the entire emotional turmoil I went through. I was so torn about it, I hope you know that. I didn’t want to break up at first. To put it simply, and I know this is so fucking cheesy, but I thought to myself - if you and I were hanging off the edge of a cliff, and Jungkook could only save one of us, who would he pick?” She gives you a small, knowing smile. “Even in that impossible situation, I knew it wouldn’t be me.”

“No, Yerim, he would have tried to save both of us.” 

She turns away, her gaze settling on the sea instead. “Maybe. But it’s always been at the back of my mind. It always would have been at the back of my mind. I know it was partly me being insecure and I know you drifted yourself from him for me so I wouldn’t feel that way, but I knew what you meant to him. He was such a good boyfriend, but I didn’t have him as a best friend the way you did. And I realised I could never really get past that.”

“I’m sorry.”

She looks at you, her expression gentle. “Don’t be.”

There’s a pause.

“I’m glad it’s you,” she finally says, her voice steady. “I always knew he deserved someone who could be everything for him. A best friend, a partner, someone who really understands him. And that was never going to be me, not completely.”

You feel a lump forming in your throat, a mix of gratitude and sadness. “You were so important and meant so much to him, Yerim. You still are. He was so happy with you.”

She nods, her dark eyes shining with something that looks like acceptance. “I know. And that’s enough. I want him to be happy, and if that’s with you, then I’m genuinely okay with it. I have always been okay with it.”

The sincerity in her words touches you deeply, and for a moment, you’re overwhelmed. The love, the loss, and the resolution that seems to settle between you.

“Thank you,” you say, meaning it more than you can express.

She reaches out, giving your hand a gentle squeeze. “Just take care of him, okay? Keep him in line. All drunk phases of him.”

You exchange a laugh, and you both sit there for a moment longer, the unspoken understanding between you finally at peace.

Jungkook comes down to the beach about two hours later. 

There's a strange flutter in your stomach as your eyes search for him. His gaze sweeps the area, scanning for you amidst the crowd. A few people greet him as he arrives, including Yerim. You know they haven’t really had a chance to talk since the breakup. Not like this, where they can genuinely connect. You notice the subtle tension in his posture as they exchange a few words, his shoulders stiff at first, but it doesn’t take long for him to relax. You stay back, letting them have their moment. 

When he finally spots you, his face lights up.

“Yerim’s not blonde anymore,” he says, his tone wrought with disbelief. She had been bleach blonde the entire time he knew her, and the change seems to have caught him off guard.

You laugh at his astonishment. “I know right? I think black hair really suits her.”

“It does,” he agrees, nodding slightly as if still processing it. You notice his expression, suggesting he’s thinking, perhaps a memory or an inside joke only him and Yerim shared in relation to it. Don’t they say hair holds memories? You don’t pry or ask him further, sensing that this brief flicker of sentimentality, is something that belongs to them only. 

“How are you doing?” he asks you, leaning to kiss your temple.

You pull your jacket a little tighter around yourself. “I was about to head home. It's getting a bit chilly. Sorry, I was going to text you, but I got distracted.”

“Don't worry about it,” he replies, his voice gentle. His hands interlace yours, which doesn’t help the awful fluttering in your tummy. God, this is awful, after all that talk that you didn’t like him that way all those months ago and now you feel like you’re a naïve teenager tripping over your own words all over again. 

“I would've come anyway to walk you back,” he tells you, “I’m not really in the mood to drink tonight.”

“Are you sure you don’t want at least one drink? You’re already here,” you suggest, though part of you is already eager to leave the noise behind.

He shakes his head with a small smile. “Can’t be arsed. I just want to lie down.”

“You know what, me too.”

.

When you’re both back at his place, you both make a beeline for his bed to collapse on the mattress with a shared sigh of relief. 

“I’m so tired. This assignment was driving me insane,” he groans, flinging an arm over his eyes as if to block out the world. 

You roll onto your side to face him, watching the way his chest rises and falls with each breath. “Are you almost done with it?” you ask.

“Yup. All done, actually.”

“That’s actually very impressive.” 

He peeks at you from beneath his arm, a small smile tugging at the corners of his lips. Reaching out, he tenderly strokes your hair, his fingers gentle and reassuring.

Despite the comfort of his touch, your mind drifts back to the conversation with Yerim. Her admitting that she missed him and his presence in her life, weighs heavily on you. It forces you to reflect on your own relationship with him. Losing Jungkook, or no longer having him in your life, makes your stomach sink with dread. Even though it was your idea to date each other to see how things would go, because you trusted him, you realise now just how devastating it would be if you ever had to break up and couldn't remain friends. The idea of a life without him, in any sort of form, feels unbearable.

You shift closer to him, pressing your forehead against his shoulder, needing the physical connection and the comfort of his warmth to anchor your swirling thoughts. 

“Jungkook,” you whisper, the vulnerability in your voice surprising you, “I don’t ever want to lose you.”

His hand pauses in your hair, then resumes its gentle caress, a quiet understanding passing between you. 

“You won’t,” he murmurs, his voice soft but resolute. “You’re my best friend, I’m not going anywhere.” He pauses, his hand trailing to trace your cheek. “And I love you.” He doesn’t anticipate your reply, like the many other times he’s said it, just kisses you deeply.  

In his arms, the exhaustion from your walk along the beach finally catches up with you, and you drift into a peaceful sleep. At some point, you feel him move beside you. He gently lifts you to free himself, careful not to disturb your rest. You peek through half-lidded eyes, watching as he reaches for his noise-cancelling headphones on the bedside table. The quiet thumps of footsteps from the room above - Jimin’s room - fill the air, a familiar annoyance for Jungkook. He has always been sensitive to noise, a trait that often makes you question why he chose the downstairs room, knowing how much he despises the sound of footsteps overhead. He always argues that he preferred being closer to the kitchen and thought Jimin wouldn’t be a heavy walker, but it didn't take long for that assumption to be proven wrong, and now he’s stuck with the downstairs bedroom with the stomper in the room above. 

As he settles back beside you, he gives you a tender peck on the forehead before lying on his back, his headphones securely over his ears. You shift slightly, turning to face him, and find yourself captivated by the peaceful rise and fall of his chest, the even rhythm of his breaths. 

It hits you all at once. That what you feel for him is far more profound than you’ve allowed yourself to admit. Far bigger than just feelings for him, far bigger than plain fond affection for a ploughmans sandwich. No, it’s something far deeper. Something that has quietly, but steadily grown into something that has wrapped itself around your heart, anchoring you to him in a way that’s both exhilarating and, strangely, not as terrifying as its fast development had been. The realisation is both startling and liberating.

You continue to watch him, your chest tightening with the weight of this newfound understanding. The words are right there on the tip of your tongue, and though your heart is pounding, you take a deep breath and whisper, “Jungkook?”

When he doesn’t respond, your heart sinks slightly, but of course he’s not responding, he’s wearing his noise-cancelling headphones. You almost laugh at yourself for forgetting something so silly. But you persist, because maybe saying it now, even if he can’t hear you, will make it easier when you find the courage to tell him later when he’s fully present. 

“Jungkook … I don’t think I can follow my six-month rule.” You take another deep breath, your voice steady despite the fluttering in your chest. This was a big deal. “Jungkook, I think I love you.”

His eyes shoot open, a look of surprise and curiosity flashing across his face. 

“What did you say?” he asks, his tone laced with disbelief. 

He pulls off his headphones, tossing them aside, his eyes locking onto yours with a gaze so intense that your breath catches, a mix of confusion and realisation dawning on you. 

“I think I love you,” you repeat, the words coming out more clearly this time, though your expression betrays your incredulity. “You could hear me that whole time? I’m gonna whack you, you idiot.” You laugh softly, nervous but relieved.

A slow smile spreads across his face as he shifts closer, his eyes never leaving yours. “I could hear all of it. Sorry,” he says, the warmth in his voice wrapping around you. “I love you too. But you already know that.” 

You nudge him. “I can’t believe you made me say it twice.”

He chuckles softly, his hand reaching out to gently brush a stray strand of hair from your face. 

His voice is low and sincere. “I needed to hear it twice to make sure it wasn’t just a dream.”

You roll your eyes. But there’s a softness in your gaze as you look at him. 

“Well, it’s not a dream.”

He closes the small gap between you, his forehead resting gently against yours. 

“I know,” he says, his breath warm against your skin. “And I’m so glad it’s not.”

.

Notes: Wrote the epilogue after 4 years but finished the final 3/4 of it in a day, the writer's block was definitely rampant! As well as just how busy my degree made me. I've started this chapter in so many different ways before and could just never finish it. When I first posted this fic it was months before I started university, and now 4 years later I have my degree plus a job lined up how absolutely insane is that. What’s even more insane is that when I posted this fic 4 years ago I hadn’t had a boyfriend ever or gone through any of the gross feelings leading to having one, which is also probably why I struggled so much with the epilogue when I finished the second chapter. Now myself and my other half have been together 3.5 years (?!?). And when I wrote this chapter, I definitely had him in mind. Gross. So many different takes on love and what it is, this is mine. Also ploughmans sandwich supremacy. Also I haven't been on tumblr in years does anyone still use tumblr 😭 But anyway, that’s a wrap!

[familyvideostevie]

hey.

okay. hello! i'm back. :)

maybe you noticed, maybe not, but i have been away for a while.

i wish i could say i've been out living my life, so caught up in happiness and joy and loving each day that i've just not had time for tumblr. but....that is not true. i have been having a tough time! being away has been good, as i've had time to do other things that i like and to put energy into my own well-being, but it hasn't been the best time, I'll tell you that.

i peeked on the dash every now and then to keep my queue full and reblogged soothing things to my main blog and tried my best not to feel guilty about it all (i was also booping on April 1 lol). i just...I really needed a break. i've really enjoyed being here the last six or so months as i've changed my blog and entered the pedro/tlou space but i've also felt so, so alone.

and i know that it doesn't really matter!! like, we should all take breaks and go outside and all that stuff. and I know plenty of people are not very active, but this blog has been such a vital part of my life and happiness since I started it almost two years ago, so any lapse in activity feels like a loss. I've met lifelong friends and flexed my writing muscles and learned a hell of a lot. the fact that I have started to feel isolated and alone on here is a sort of personal betrayal, and there is no one to blame but myself.

So, I’m pulling back.

it means a few things — i don’t know how much writing I’ll be doing from now on. For Joel, especially — it’s been wonderful to meet folks in that community but it has also been really detrimental to my passion for both the game and writing. I’d like to return to some other characters on my masterlist, but we’ll see. I’ve got endless personal projects away from tumblr that I want to pour love and time into (my non-reader fics, my newsletter, a romance novel, a sci-fi novel, poetry, etc). I need to fall in love with my own work again.

it's a me problem, I want to stress that. i'm working on it! irl stuff has been kicking my ass. I've had a really, really hard winter and my mental health has suffered probably more than ever before. i let things I love -- like this blog -- fester and become negative and no longer being me joy. writing became stressful and difficult and I was focused on notes and interaction and looking around me and seeing success and then looking at myself and only seeing lack.

but that's why I took a break! i am getting help and support irl, i am putting in the time and effort to feel better about being alive and to be a better friend and person all around. And I want to tell you all about it because I am so grateful for your time and attention and support, even if we’re just strangers on the internet. i know this probably seems silly -- who cares about a fanfic blog? well, i care! i care a lot! it matters to me and therefore it matters!

anyway. on to the important stuff. here I am! and here's what's going to happen on this blog:

I am working on replying to asks and reblogs and comments I missed. Thank you for being patient with me! I don't know if I'll get to them all but know I see them and I am honored every single time.

I made a totally separate ao3 account with this blog url. I'm working on uploading everything I've posted here onto there and hopefully will continue to crosspost. It is going to take a long, long time, so please be patient! (you can follow my other ao3 here for my non x-reader fanfic).

I posted this fic! Jackson!Joel pulled me back into his world. It’s the first thing I’ve written in ages, so let me know what you think. as of now it's the last planned fic for that series, but who knows!

I hit a milestone while i was away that I am absolutely blown away by. I'm planning a celebration around it sometime this spring (hopefully) and I’d love to see you participate :)

lastly, thank you so much to my friends for letting me complain, whine, winge, etc. I am so sorry for missing all of your work, your celebrations, your bright energies, and all the rest. i am so sorry if it seemed like i was ignoring you. you are my guiding lights, my silver linings, my touchstones. you make me want to be here. i will try to make it up to you!

I want to be online less but make sure I’m connecting more in the moments that i am here. I want to pressure myself to write less and not feel bad that I’m not engaged all the time. I want this blog to once again feel like a place that nourishes me and not sucks me dry. i want to stop feeling like shit about all of it!!!!

so. come hang out in my inbox, my dms, let me know what you've been up to. I am really sorry for missing so much. thank you for sticking around. <3

[crystalclear365]

Some things that I'm working on

Now that I'm finished with How Are We Friends? (THANK GOD.), I'm finally able to work on some other projects I've been wanting to share with y'all! I'll be making a separate post for each of them, but for now, here's a bullet-point list with a short description of each of them. I hope to have all of them uploaded onto ao3 (completed or not) by the time I go to start posting chapters for the sequel to HAWF. :)

Apple Cider: A Mega Man farmer/country, human AU. (What has my life come to...) Instead of building robot masters, Light and his kids are all a bunch of farmers, along with the Wilys. They have a deep rivalry with each other, and it doesn't help the fact that they live right next to each other. But there's a vacant house in the middle, which the Cossacks will move into and become enveloped in the chaos while trying to live in their new environment coming from Mega City. Both the classic and X-series characters will be involved. :D

Unbreakable Bonds: A Mega Man x Pokémon AU, which is basically a big huge what-if scenario if the characters from both the classic and x-series were human, and living in the world of Pokémon. They all live in the "Neo Region", and the narrative follows both the classic and the x gang as they gain gym badges and ribbons from gym battles and contests. Unfortunately, a persisting group of bad guys keeps getting in the way... but it'll probably work itself out!

Two Sides of the Same Coin: A Mega Man role-swap AU, where Light is the villain, and Wily is the good guy, which in turn would make Bass the protagonist of the series, and Rock (Mega Man) the anti-hero. However, the only catch is that they all keep their personalities and beliefs (to some extent). This creates an interesting narrative. Bass will actually have to put his ego aside, and learn how to be a good person for once. But will he be able to do it?

Mega Man: Restart: A crackfic where it's a retelling of the main games, but every death the player, or Mega Man gets actually counts in the story. Including the level restarts. Wily is going insane trying to figure out how Light rebuilds him so fast, with Bass being just as baffled, if not more so than Wily.

Untitled Mega Man x Kalinka fanfic(s): Unfortunately, I don't have a name for this one. But I plan on writing maybe a couple of one-shots or a multi-chapter fic of this rare pair. C:

Secret project with @pale-opal: Opal has mentioned it a couple of times in her previous posts, but I also want to mention it on here since it's still a WIP. Unfortunately, I can't say much, but there's a lot of cooking and baking that's going to be happening. Does anyone want some freshly burnt water?

I have other projects that I plan to work on, but they're mainly one-shots. But I do have one fic that I'm going to upload either tomorrow or later this week called "Publicity Stunt". I started working on it back in November, but I couldn't work on it for a while because I had to focus on my main project. But fortunately, I was able to complete it earlier this month, and I'm so glad that I was able to. :) (I hope you guys will like it!)

If you guys have any questions about my fics, feel free to ask! ^^

[runninriot]

this wasn't planned but i guess Sweet Thing is now a two-parter

written for @subeddieweek

complete fic uploaded on ao3

Safe Space

rated: E | tags: Client Eddie Munson, Pro Dom Steve Harrington, 18+ content, sensation play, anal play, smut | snippet, complete fic and tag list on ao3

Master H, it says on the website Eddie stumbled upon one lonely night a few months ago. He introduced himself as Steve but Eddie never calls him by his name.

He calls him Sir when he addresses him. It’s what they agreed upon when Eddie entered the dungeon for the first time. It felt almost like an interview, like he was applying for a job. Which is kind of funny because it’s the other man who gets paid to do these things to him.

Eddie didn’t really know what to expect when he decided to get his fix from a stranger, a professional, someone who knows what they’re doing. Turned out it was the best decision he could’ve made. Ever.

This is a safe space to explore, to want without being prone to fall for yet another man making false promises. Another man abusing his trust, abusing his desire to give up control.

Here, Eddie can fully succumb to the feeling of letting go.

    “Please, Sir. I need more.”

It should be embarrassing how whiny his voice sounds, how messed-up he already is, trembling violently, helplessly pulling at the restraints keeping him tied to the bed. They’ve only started their session and he’s already so hard, so ready to come. So ready for Steve to tip him over the edge. But it would be a shame to fall so quickly because it’s the before that really gets to Eddie every time.

He enjoys it maybe too much. To be at the other man’s mercy, unable to get away from his heavenly torture.

The clamps on his nipples hurt, send a rippling wave of pain through his whole body whenever the Dom tugs at them or tightens the screws to punish him for squirming around although he told him to stay still.

Ordered him to be good, to earn his reward.

Eddie wants to be good, tries his best to keep his body from jolting up at the feeling of needle-like pricks biting into his skin when Steve uses this tool that looks like a mix of medical device and instrument of torture. It’s called a neurowheel, Eddie’s learned when they talked about their scene. Before they started. Before Eddie got spread out on the bed like a offering for a God – and maybe he is.

Because the man currently teasing the ever-loving shit out of him, tormenting the insides of his thighs with a satisfied grin on his handsome face, truly is a divine creature.

It’s not only his looks, although Eddie has found himself getting lost in his big, beautiful eyes a lot lately; they’re so soft in comparison to the hardness in his demanding voice when he orders him around, tells him what to do.

    ‘Kneel down.’

    ‘Open up.’

    ‘Hold still.’

    ‘Come for me.’

He’s guardian angel and soul-eating demon,  both morphed into one perfect body.

And not for the first time, Eddie wished he was real. That he could have someone like him in his life. Out there, in the real world. That he could have this, always, not only when he’s paying for this perfect illusion.

But he’d rather have this than nothing at all.

It’s enough, at least for the time being.

And he’s not going to let his mind’s racing thoughts ruin the moment. He needs more though, to shut up the voices.

   “Sir, please! Fill me up, let me come! Please, I need it!” Eddie begs, doesn’t feel stupid doing so because he knows how much Steve likes when he dissolves into a pleading, sobbing mess. He can see it in his eyes and the way he greedily licks his lips like he’s craving for a taste.

Eddie would let him. Hell, he’d let him eat him alive if that’s what he wanted.

But that’s not what Steve does when he unbuckles the shackles at his feet, rubs soothing thumbs over the irritated skin on his ankles before he bends him in half.

It’s always messy when he fucks him. When he uses a dildo to split him open. Lube is dripping down his crack while Eddie’s hole is stretched almost painfully wide around the base of the silicone toy. So deep inside that he thinks he can feel it in his throat. Every time his torturer pulls it back out, a sobbing breath leaves his lungs like he can’t breathe with it inside him. And every time he pushes back in, Eddie’s body convulses, wrists tugging ineffectively at the restraints keeping him in place.

There is something about the other man’s aura that sends a wave of fear through Eddie, a darkness in his master’s eyes that reflects something like frustration mixed with deeply engraved desire. Like Steve’s greedy for Eddie’s pitiful whimpers. Like seeing Eddie fall apart is as satisfying for him as it is for his willing victim.

It’s almost as if Steve, too, is falling apart. Only a little. Almost unnoticeable.

But Eddie can feel it in the way he pushes the toy inside him, fucks him harder than he ever has before. The merciless hand around his cock is almost too much, too rough, too tight, angry. But when Eddie looks up at him, he finds so much devotion in the other man’s hazel eyes that Eddie nearly loses it.

The words are right there, on the tip of his tongue, waiting to spill.

    Want you inside me. Take me. Take all of me. Make me yours.

Thankfully, they never get the chance to fully form when a loud and desperate cry drowns everything else out. Eddie comes hard, feels like he’s falling.

And then everything goes black.

[oriley42]

BUCKLE IN, LOML, THIS IS GONNA BE A LONG ONE.

hi !! i'm bea, aka meekspeeks on AO3, and i have only recently managed to properly sink my teeth into House MD, being exam free and all. and, akin to any other Normal, Sane person, i immedietly went onto ao3 to cure my bone rattling depression by immersing myself in fics. any kind, people, any kind. and then i found yours.

and my GOD.

you, my dear, dear, sweet friend, are the best writer . ever, dare i say? i have downloaded your books onto my phone for easy reading when i'm... actually, when i'm doing anything. just woke up? ah, yes, the sound of birdsong and an oriley42 fic to sweeten the summer morning. about to go to bed? well, why not get comfy with an oriley42 classic. i highlight them. i seriously, seriously consider getting them tattooed to the inside of my eyelids. all of them. i am not kidding.

in fact, if i was a tech savvy bastard, which i am not (sometimes i Glance, i Peek, i even bloody Breathe in the direction of my ipad, and it restarts. same goes for my phone. and my computer), i would have made an entire new collection on my ao3 account, simply yet perfectly dubbed "oriley42: The Saga", and thus announced to the entirety of the internet my undying love for you, of which there is A LOT. you are amazing and sometimes i wonder if you're even real and not some kind of... demigod?

(i love your fics so much that i get a little e-mail every single time you upload. that's my level of devotion.)

i have never ever laughed harder at anything than i do your fics. when i add said fics to my hilson collection, i make sure that i have a section devoted to a portion of the bits i've highlighted that made me Lose My Shit. i love randomly quoting phrases to my baffled, non-house-loving friends, and even they giggle. you are a riot, my good lord, and i owe you my life.

i'm a true oriley42 expert, i've read them all. no one knows oriley42 like i know oriley42, apart from you, oriley42.

it's a fun name to type. oriley42.

anyway! this is long. my sincerest apologies. but, coming from a frazzled kid who's just finished her a levels, you kept me going through all the horrid, hasty revision that i had to conjure up out of Thin Fucking Air, by making me laugh when no one else could. thank you so much, and i look forward to any other fics that are Brewing in that Lovely Head Of Yours !!!

have a great... day, week, month, year, life !! i love you !!! <3

my buddy, my pal, my dear new bff, thank you so very much! it means the world to hear this, and I'm so deeply touched that my stories could be companion to you, especially as you fight your way through what sounds like a very difficult bit of schooling (wishing you all the success there btw!!)

to give someone Real Feelings, and most of all a Real Laugh, is my greatest aim in sharing my writing--thank you for making me feel like the frankly terrifying vulnerability of posting these stories up where any old Tom, Dickhead, or Harasser can make jackass comments is worth it, because of the chance that my words will cross paths with a kind reader like you <3

your own writing voice just here in this ask is charming and clever, and makes me once again grateful for the incredible talent and kindness the internet allows us all to connect to and enjoy (cheesy, I know, but I really do get teary thinking of all the wonderful people who draw and write and comment and reblog and contribute to these magnificently silly fictional worlds we weave together!)

I hereby grant you a Master's Degree in ORiley42 studies from the University of Internet Friends--much like my own advanced degree, it will not get you a job anywhere, but hey, it's about the joy of learning ;)

Thank you for stopping by, I hope to see you on the digital streets of House MD fan-land again!

xoxo

PS - I have soooo many hilson WIPs brewing, too many to keep straight, but I'm hoping to pick one, focus, and get it posted in the next week or two...stay tuned! 💖

[adiraofthetals]

On Tumblr For Five Months!

Five months!! I still can't believe it! I will note not much of excitement happened this month. It's a new year so people have been busy with life. So I guess without much more delay we shall recap this month!

@ajtal has been doing his @ajtal things. Posting pretty art and has two new fics this month! "Ceramic" and "I.S.S. Opportunity". Like I have said before his ao3 is AJ_TAL2671 and is registered ao3 users only. Also, he has been working on a terran doctor cosplay!

@sadmushroomgoblin has been doing the fanfic grind. They are at a total of 1093 fics with 759 being Discovery! I still can't believe they are still writing about Discovery every day. I feel like I would die if I had to. We worship you our crazy mushroom majesty.

@ashlexzz birthday was yesterday. So go tell them happy birthday if you haven't already! They have been posting art on their Tumblr so go check them out!

@weltato has been posting some fics with month. If you haven't seen it yet they made a Mirror!Adira sequel fic that was posted not long after my last recap. Go check it out on ao3 under the username of Welcome2MyWorld.

Last but not least @mxflowercheck. They haven't been that active but we have been assured they are still alive. I know this because they message me to explain American things to them. Though I don't know if they are working on anything as far as I know. We still love them tho!

Finally, what have I been up to? Well, school has been kicking my ass so haven't been working on fics as of late but hopefully soon I will get back on the fanfic grind. Update Just Another Day In Eureka. Cause it has been uhhhh. Maybe let's not talk about how long it's been.

But I did post a fic about Paul getting high called "Dirt Man" and my school story about the 1906 San Francisco Earthquake. Which you can read here (registered ao3 users only for this one cause I don't need my school to find it.)

One last main thing! Its been a month of the Star Trek Discovery community and I am so happy for the dumb little things we post on there. Hope to see more of it!

I have been posting on @littlestoftheprincesses which uploads the official manga chapters from Guardian Tales coming from the hellscapes of Twitter onto here for Tumblr fans to enjoy and not have to touch that site. Also, I am trying to post more on @discoveryineureka so I will hopefully have more posts soon. (My DVDs and Eureka comic + Discovery comic are all coming tomorrow so I got some things to post.) And now thinking of it I should post more on @grayofthetals too tbh.

[tennessoui]

ko-fi fic uploads

hey guys, I'm going to start putting some of my new tumblr prompt fills and writing warm-ups (ficlets of 4k-6k length) up on my ko-fi!!

Monthly supporters will be able to go into the gallery tab on my ko-fi and click on an uploaded image. The title will be which tumblr-based au the ficlet fits into and how many words it is. The description beneath the image will be a quick summary of the au and a link to the google doc containing the ficlet. The "root" au post, aka the post that started the au on my blog, will be linked as well on that google doc.

This will not affect my wips and progress on them in any way! I feel like that's very important to state - I write these sorts of ficlets all the time because it helps get me in the writing mindset for writing ao3 fics. I will just be spending a little extra effort on them to put them up on ko-fi.

I will NOT be posting any ficlets on my ko-fi that you need to read to understand a fic on ao3 - that's some disney monster conglomerate kind of shit. I will also still be posting shorter ficlets (1k-3k) on tumblr as I write them, especially if I'm answering a prompt someone sent me here. Again, I think it'd be a bit of dick move to not do that

I'll try to vary which ficlets go up on ko-fi and every time I upload one, I'll make a post about which au it is as well as a link to the page in case anyone wants to, idk, unsubscribe for a month because they hate the hopeless in coruscant au, and then refollow next month because they enjoy the playmaker au etc etc

I'm definitely still trying to figure out what I want this to look like and what feels fair or reasonable, so hopefully this isn't a huge mess on my end!

All this being said:

I've posted the first ficlet/fic on ko-fi: it's for the Senator Menace AU, an au that's basically "What if phantom menace but reversed? how fucked up would anakin get over the youngling his father master died to protect?"

the first au post is here // my ko-fi is here

[your-dose-of-obidala]

I’ve felt the fandom so dead these past weeks/month 😭 not a single story has been uploaded in ao3 💔

Nonny, I feel for you! Sometimes being a rare pair shipper sucks. It sucks a lot. I know, I know. Seeing every other pairing florish and fics beibg posted and talked about... yeah. Sucks. But the thing is that Obidala is a fucking old ship and I think for that fact we do alright?

And the thing is that these past few weeks fandom has been aflutter with activity. Royal Blue has come out, Good Omens 2 arrived and killed a lot of people (me included, sorry for the absence), Heartstopper has come out, Hozier brought out a new album... well. We are all just people and mostly neurodivergent at that which means we go were the dopamine is.

But you know what? There will be more fics. I promise you. There will be people thinking about fic ideas and plotting and writing again. There are always waves for a ship like Obidala. Remember when Kenobi came out? There was a flood of new content. But before that it was pretty quiet here too. So, get out your old faves and re-read. Is anyone open for fic requests rn? Maybe hit them up! Or maybe, maybe try and write your own story that has been silently lurking in yiur head for oh so long. In any case, the draught is only temporary.

Love, peace and Obidala ✌🏾

[kirby-souljourney-au]

Welcome to Kirby: Soul Journey!

Hello!! My name is Bugthing, I use he/xey/it/they pronouns, and I am the mod of this account. This is a sideblog made very specifically for all things regarding my Kirby AU, Soul Journey! I store whatever Kirby-related content I make here, including a project I’ve been working on since the 20th of December, 2022.

If you’ve been following me for long enough, whether here or on my main blog (@goblinbugthing), you know very well what that is, but for the new people, allow me to introduce you to the biggest project I have ever worked on in my entire life…

The Kirby: Soul Journey AU fic!

As I said before, this has been in progress since 2022, and it is currently unfinished. I had put the fic itself on hiatus for months before I said anything, though the announcement of the hiatus itself was only posted in November 2023.

At the time, I had been working on chapter 2, and eventually gave up on it entirely because it wasn’t living up to my (unreasonably high) expectations.

However, soon after I announced the hiatus, I decided I would be rewriting the entire fic from scratch.

And that brings us to where we are today! The rewrite is in progress, research is being done, changes are being made, and I’m slightly more confident in my writing than before. So, make sure to check in with the blog every now and then to see any updates!

Everything else, under the cut!

(Divider gif via @/animatedglittergraphics-n-more)

Stats:

Currently in the planning stage.

Chapter in progress: None

Asks: Open

Send in anything regarding the AU! I love answering questions!

Ref sheet masterlist doc here! [Unfinished — we’ve got a LOT to go]

I must add that ArtShield desaturates the colours slightly after shielding, so please reference the hex codes written down in the post for the correct colours!

Voice claim masterlist doc is readable here!

Chapter Index

IT RETURNS. (Teaser A) (AO3 / Wattpad)

The Destruction. (Teaser B) (AO3 / Wattpad)

A Reaper’s Blade (Prologue) (AO3 / Wattpad)

Read the Original (VERY OUTDATED) (AO3 / Wattpad)

Teaser A - The True Ultimate Life-Form (Tumblr ver.)

Teaser B - Threat to the Multiverse (Tumblr ver.)

Prologue - Preparations (Tumblr ver.)

Chapter 1 - Return of One and Introduction to Another (Tumblr ver.)

Read the Oneshots (ALSO VERY OUTDATED) (AO3 / Wattpad)

MERCY (Tumblr ver.)

Hold the Stars (Tumblr ver.)

Taboo (Tumblr ver.)

Exile (Tumblr ver.)

Once So Great (Tumblr ver.)

Awaken (Tumblr ver.)

Gentle Angel (Tumblr ver.)

Righteous Anger (non-canon) (Tumblr ver.)

Comics

Wanderer’s Curiosity (OUTDATED)

If any of the links are broken, please let me know! I'll get to fixing them right away!

Tag Key

#sincerely - mod bugthing — Posts from me, the mod, ranging from nonsense to progress updates.

#k:sj au — Things generally regarding the AU itself (e.g. voice claims, character refs, worldbuilding).

k:sj new generation — Anything regarding the future of the Soul Journey universe (e.g. future fankid designs)

#k:sj voices — Character voice claims.

#k:sj characters — Character reference sheets.

k:sj newgen characters — New Generation character reference sheets.

#dreamland’s mailbox — Any asks you send in.

#dreamland’s polls — Any polls I make here.

#dreamland art exhibit — Original art regarding the AU.

#not k:sj canon — Things not canonical to the AU (e.g. what if scenarios, crossovers).

#not soul journey / other aus — Posts unrelated to K:SJ, and/or other people’s AUs.

#kirby: soul journey — Actual, real, canonical, proper chapters and oneshots.

I tag triggers with #cw: (trigger)

I tag OCs with #oc: (character)

Please note that this section may be updated in the future.

Socials

YouTube (I rarely upload, but I do use community posts sometimes)

Wattpad (My fanfics’ second home)

Archive Of Our Own (All my fics live here)

$$app (Consider supporting me by donating)

Ko-Fi (Commissions currently closed)

For now, that appears to be it! Have a good day, and enjoy your time in Dreamland!

— Mod Buggie

[honeekyuu]

hey this is the shy anon from the other day that read through your ao3 and i just wanted to stop in and say to take your time and don’t let these anons get to you. i know you’ve been writing on your ao3 for a while now but your tumblr is literally brand new and i’m honestly at a loss for words that you’re already getting rude anons and people pressuring you to post more.

you seem like a really busy gal and i’d hate for demands like that to burn you out. you’re doing amazing and don’t let anybody be an asshole to you. post what you want when you want/can, i’ve seen far too many people give up on fandom because they feel like they have to constantly churn out content to the detriment of their creativity and passion. you’re so talented and based on the frequency with which you’ve been writing in the last few months it seems like you have a fire in your soul for haikyuu. i hate seeing it taken for granted and i just wanted to let you know you have support in doing whatever the fuck it is you want.

(feel no obligation to reply to this, just wanted to offer some support after seeing such atrocious fandom etiquette literal days into the life of this blog)

wow, i really dont know what to say--

i saw this as soon as you sent it in, but i was honestly super shocked that id gotten it, so ive just been sitting here thinking ab it.

it means probably more than you realize that you sent something so kind. i've been writing for a long long time now (both here on a different blog and on ao3), and it's true that i am very busy, because unfortunately being a phd student and running experiments and spending all my time running back and forth between my advisors and conferences and the lab means i have a schedule thats not really a schedule, and i can never really say when or what im going to be inspired enough to write, enough that i can pull myself out of daily burnout. i experience writing droughts often, sometimes lasting up to a year before i feel the urge to sit down with a doc again. and i have a LOT of half-written fics that have never seen the light of day, which i plan to get back to eventually but which, in reality, may never get finished.

ive gotten so much love and support over the years, and it's brought me back to writing every time. i love haikyuu with my soul, and i think about my fics almost every day because i feel a burning need to write them. if not for anyone else, then just for me.

but this blog is brand new, so, even though that anon i received definitely tops the list of unfriendly comments ive gotten over the many years of writing, i wanted to be as kind and accommodating as possible. because i dont want people to think im ungrateful and will ignore criticism, because no one likes those kinds of writers. but i am also a person, and writing is hard, so i think i will continue to do things my way.

my writing style is this, for anyone who'd like to know: i am erratic, and i dont have an upload schedule, because i cant realistically manage one. i have periods of inactivity, because life is hard, and i have periods of hyperactivity, because i love this fandom and the way that haikyuu makes me feel in a life that's full of terrible feelings. this may annoy some people, and i can understand that. but i cant force myself to write if im not in a place to write, and i cant force myself to stick to one fic at a time, because then it'll be clear that it's been forced.

im extremely annoying and unhinged and feral and i will talk about several different fics and smaus and text threads and headcanons all within the same breath. but i will always write what i love, so if you'd like to see work that is well-loved, feel free to stick around.

thank you very much to everyone whos been so kind in my inbox tonight, and i hope to see you all tomorrow <3

[shadowqnights]

this might be a really stupid ask but how did you come up with the plot of loverman? obviously most of it is just the original diaries plot with some divergence but i guess what’s your thought process behind writing it?

literally not a stupid ask at all! loverman actually started with the ending! originally i was just gonna write a little oneshot au of mcd with a tragic ending, kind of like 'oh what if mcd ended with [insert big spoiler here]' and i was like okay I'm gonna write a little fic cause i'm inspired! i was actually telling a group chat i was in at the time about the fact that i had a nasty angst idea to write and i was excited about it. it originally wasn't planned on being a massive project with this many words, it was just going to be a fun little au oneshot on ao3. but then i started writing and i realised that with my writing style it'd need to be multi-chap.

i realised i wanted to take it way slower. and slower. and slower. until we got to the pace we are now. when i first started loverman i was in the middle of my final exams for high school, and when they finished i was writing and uploading a new update every single day because i was so utterly fixated on it. it was all i breathed. which i don't regret in the slightest, even though that pace was very demanding and now as a uni student uploading once a month or greater works a lot better considering i can only write when i'm not studying. but at the time, freshly graduated, it was the best thing in the world to finally have a project that i was so consumed and in love with that i just couldn't stop working on. because of the fact that i was literally just writing every day without stopping and not planning much, all of loverman's early plot was made up on the spot. just as i went along on impulse, so like if you see plotholes or inconsistencies from ch1 to ch50 its probably because im writing it 2 years later and trying to plan ahead for once. but from the beginning everything has been working towards the ending because thats what i started with and thats always been in my mind definitely and unchangeable.

so no, its not a stupid ask at all<3 i forget that not many people actually know the loverman origins and the fact that from the start it's always been about the ending :) but its been so long by now that i've obviously developed the story a lot beyond the ending and there's a lot more narrative to come :)

[justworthlessreblogs]

waffleverse: full bibury fic author's notes

this fic is so long and i had so many writing decisions/notes i wanted to talk about that they couldn't all fit in ao3's 5000 character limit. so i figured i might as well put them here. they'll be under a cut to prevent any accidental spoilers!

writing notes:

- first off this fic drove me CRAZY. another one of its nicknames was “the frankenfic” because i really did feel like i had 3 fics i was shoving into one. and it also took on a life of its own. every day i wake up and scold myself for deciding that covering 33-40 was a good idea. it was not helped by me not having many strong feelings about any of the episodes in that set, which led to me feeling really bored when writing them, and then in the last month of writing i said “fuck it, we ball” and started just making up shit. i also remembered Hey I Made Bibury Try To Kill Rio Back In May I Should Do Something About That. so you get bibury backstory! plus i was sad that they never explore her’s and rio’s time working under noir in canon aside from like. one scene in episode 18

- rio is trying his best to be better at emotions but it is definitely an uphill battle and not linear. the other cures meant well by accepting bibury so easily - after all, it didn’t really work out that great when they were constantly suspicious of him - but he didn’t see it the same way they did. in his eyes bibury was getting away with everything even though she did similar things to him. this was inspired by how the show itself does not seem to ever hold bibury accountable (at least as of where i’m at) but makes it very clear that rio needed to do something to make up for what he did (which i am fine with! this is not a “omg poor rio he was so hated by the writers” moment. i just found it interesting and thought i could explore it)

- episode 37 was the reason for like. nearly all of my original writer's block. it almost got cut, but in the end 34 got the chopping block instead because i felt that bibury didn't really have a justification to be there and 36 got basically entirely cut because i thought it was boring. plus 37 was just… too important to not acknowledge unfortunately. i still definitely want to write a waffleverse version of 34, though, i just think it’d work better on its own! which is why i summarized it here. i had the entire thing written out and saved it, so the original version will probably get uploaded to spice of life someday

- rio being like “i am so mad at my sister. however she is upset so i will make her waffles” was very funny to me. the duality of rio kuroki

- i left the bib & rio talk at the end open-ended, since i had so many things they could have possibly discussed that i couldn’t fit them all in naturally no matter how hard i tried. so let your imaginations go wild lol. however i guess i do have to thank that original draft of their conversation since it was the thing that finally, finally, made me figure out what i wanted from this fic - exploring not just bibury, but bibury and rio. this fic was originally a lot more ciel-heavy than what the final product ended up being, and frankly bib & rio didn’t interact much at all, and i wasn’t able to get to the bottom of why they still hated each other until i remembered. hey. attempted murder

- you are all so lucky that i ended up incorporating 26 into this fic because the original plan was for the scenes that changed to be stuck into spice of life when i got around to writing them someday. the mcu-ification of waffleverse is defeated for another day

- no fantastic animale because i really dislike those super forms and the attack. this is one of two times i have actively disregarded canon, i usually try to stick as close to canon events as possible (which is why the crystal animals are in this. you have no idea how badly i wanted to cut them). fantastic animale is Just That Bad. this was literally the first thing i decided after i started planning this fic. so animal-go-round is powerful enough in this ‘verse. just roll with it please

- no "do sweets bring sadness?" dilemma here because i didn't vibe with that part of the episode. i was looking forward to bibury shenanigans :( the crystal animals are just cielbib shippers /j

- if the writing seems disjointed i apologize it's because this thing was written on and off over a period of 3 months and is also super long

- i had so much fun writing the bathroom scene. finally allowing myself silly rights. the flashback scenes were also really enjoyable

- i messed with the yukari v. kirarin fight because i was a little disappointed with how it played out in canon. yukari tells everyone right away here because she had a Realization because of part 4. kirarin is more resistant than the average fairy to diable in this universe but not fully immune

- RIO FINALLY GETS TO SAY FUCK WOOHOO i've waited so long for this. also bibury is definitely a character who would cuss if the show's rating wasn't the japanese equivalent of tv-y7 so i was a little looser here

- you all know it in your hearts that aoi was 100% a vine kid. also there was no way i was letting that joke slip past me

- did the math and i'm preeettty sure that rio's age in the prologue section checks out with the waffleverse timeline? when i started this series i was under the impression that rio had been gone for way longer than what the series ended up implying, and so in waffleverse i decided he was gone for about a year. he's 12-about-to-turn-13 in the prologue and 14 in the present (his & ciel’s birthday was shortly after part 4!)

-bib starts calling him rio pretty quickly because a) she may have been evil, but she respects people's preferred name choices and b) yukari already had an arc about realizing how he's not julio anymore and i really didn't want to write that same arc a second time!

- waffle’s secondary attack finally shows up!!! waffle protége my beloved. giving him some sort of barrier just Felt Right (and waffles are the perfect shape for it). i like to think he can split it apart and use it offensively a la rosetta reflection. it was originally supposed to show up in 34 (which got cut) then in 37 (then i cut the battle from the episode since it felt very forced) and then i worried i wouldn’t be able to fit it in at all but got the opportunity with the climax rewrite

- in regard to bib's aging i'm going with "noir's presence slowed down her aging a lot somehow, so she may be chronologically 106 or so, but in all other aspects she's around 13-14 and will now start aging normally again". the same would've happened to rio had he stayed with noir longer. insert noir child labor joke here

- hey remember that time noir tried to take rio back!? i guess 40 kinda busted that for canon by establishing he sees them all as expendable but in my defense while i was writing part 3 i saw it more as a twilight-dyspear situation. and then i ran with that. at this point i’m just gonna have to accept that waffleverse isn’t purely canon divergence any more thanks to me writing it as i watch the show, which leads to the show debunking things from earlier parts 

- was a bit disappointed that the great fairy meeting episode didn't really involve, well, a meeting. so they actually get some time to talk strategy here! i'm so sad the technological limitations of ichigoyama meant that i couldn't have waffle give a powerpoint presentation on noir like i wanted to. it would've been so funny. maybe i'll make it for fun someday

- yeah i messed with episode 40 like. a lot. sorry. it's just how it ended up working out tbh. i actually debated back and forth for literal months on if i should give bib a "canon cure waffle" moment or not, and nearly did it, but decided against it because in the end it just didn't feel quite right for a multitude of reasons. so you were going to get fairy combat and then bib yelling at grave instead. and then that got rewritten once i decided i wanted to expand more on why rio & bib are so antagonistic to each other. you can still see traces of the original climax though in ciel showing up with the fairies, as well as the part where bib confronts grave! bib also originally wasn’t supposed to be dragged into the town with them, she was gonna stay on the mountain and then venture down with ciel and the fairies. but rio said Nope She’s Coming With Us once the fic's course changed direction

- my beta enabled me on the "bibury hasn't slept in an actual bed in a century" thing. i originally sent it to him as a joke. he told me to go ahead with it. but let's be real noir would do something fucked up like that

- let waffle fight the townspeople 2k23. this is the other time i actively disregarded canon in the fic idc what it says He Would Do It

- bibury’s verbal beatdown of grave was inspired by her canon one in episode 40

- ciel & bib's relationship isn't gonna progress past "mutual crush" at any point in waffleverse simply because i cannot write romance sorry. rest assured it blossoms into a beautiful love story. they get married on the island where they met properly for the first time. rio is ciel's best man

- i came to the realization that a lot of my decisions regarding this fic were along the lines of "fuck canon". idk what that means

[pyrrhocorax]

Hi there was a playlist attached to one of your fics on ffn.net, I tried to find it today but it looks like your fics there are deleted :( do you still happen to have the playlist somewhere? I understand if you have moved on from that era of your digital footprint.

oooooh interesting! it does initially look like that everything is gone, but somehow i managed to. work around it??? and get back in there??? so i have access to everything and i am gonna. likely back everything up for posterity's sake. not sure where????? but i likely should re-upload all my really old writing somewhere. maybe orphan it on AO3 ?????? ?? idk i gotta think about it. so thanks for the head's up actually. i have def moved on from some of it in the sense that i wrote those stories as an extremely unstable mentally ill teenager with a laundry list of diagnosed mental/developmental disorders that i should have been institutionalized for that was deeply traumatized by a lot of things and trying to sort it all out. it was def a project of the times and my mental state/being a Youth. so i am not completely removed from it (why i left everything up -- writing helped me figure stuff out, but also helped a LOT of other people struggling with those same things, and that's what matters most to me, that i helped somebody who is struggling as deeply as i was back then, even if i've changed my interpretations of things since and would drastically re-write entire aspects of it if i re-wrote it today). and the way i view my writing is once it is in the public space it is no longer fully mine and my intent behind it is on the same level as another person's interpretation of my intent. i don't really remember what i write after i write it ngl, so it ceases to feel like it is fully mine to me once it's been a few months. ANYWAY rambling sorry my Assumption is that you are talking about Silence??? In which case, here is the soundtrack, Song - Band - any special time I used the song specifically Springleik - Gåte - Negative: Switch (Chapter 1) Curtigh - Punch Brothers - Positive: Siblings (Chapter 13) Packt Like Sardines in a Crush'd Tin Box - Radiohead - Negative Vault (Chapter 18) The Blind Leaving the Blind Mvt 2 - Punch Brothers - Denmark-centric chapters Fljótavik - Sigur Rós - Positive chapters Built For This - Ben Sollee - Positive: Every (Chapter 23), Iceland-centric And the Forest Began to Sing - Röyksopp - nature-centric chapters Singing with the Whales - Yukimi Yamamoto - Negative: Ships (Chapter 26) 3055 - Ólafur Arnalds - negative chapters Fel del Av Gården - Movits! - Positive: Siblings (Chapter 13), Positive: Hidden (Chapter 7) Tornado - Jónsi - negative chapters Everything Can Explode - The Ghost - positive chaoters Brand New Sidewalk - Nickel Creek - Neutrality: Equilibrium Little Talks - Of Monsters and Men - general theme You Are - Punch Brothers - the song Denmark sings in Positive: Skype (Chapter 25) i also remade it for you here: Youtube Playlist (says there is one thing missing for some reason?) Spotify Playlist (unfortunately missing a few songs too) also spoilers under cut for a new project i am going to be working on in the near future below b/c it is relevant to Silence, if Silence was important to you.

the next project i am going to write is a direct sequel to Sendlingur og Sandloá (era 2 pyrr writing, versus silence is era 1, we're currently beginning era 3), if you have ever read it. technically speaking, the few main things I still really like about Silence (unusual non-linear narrative structure, nor being mute, some of the philosophic arguments it makes, etc) and some of the events of Silence are "canon" prequel events to what happens in SOS. Silence isn't a prequel to SOS, but Silence is essentially the prototype version of SOS in that without Silence, SOS would have never existed and SOS was directly built upon Silence's corpse. i mean death of the author and all of that, but there isn't any denying that if you analyze the two works i think that is a very easy conclusion to come to. the new project i'm currently formulating is essentially taking SOS and those aspects of Silence i think are still valuable now that i am nearly twice as old as when i wrote it, and putting them both into a blender and seeing what happens when i reconstruct them. you will not have to read Silence or even SOS to read it, but if you have read either or both you'll go AH YOU MOTHERFUCKER at me, probably, a lot, when reading it. :/

ANYWAY SORRY FOR RAMBLING i am a ramblin sort of man lol.