#there's a reason why the main duo are named after a star vs the other teams are named after constellations

[leehama]

Hello! A friend and I were analyzing the constellations for the teams in Spica Strike and found it really cool how they contrasted (with Cygnus as a spring/summer constellation in the northern hemisphere and Lepus being a winter one). What constellation would Elliot and Nora be if they were on a team? We've theorized Virgo because Spica is a star in that constellation, or possibly Draco to follow the animal theme and because of the joke that dragons (ace people) don't exist.

It makes us both really happy to see aroace representation written so well, thank you for creating this story!

Hi there, omg this is great!!

But if I'm honest... I wasn't very careful picking out the names for Spica Strike, I semi-randomly picked "Cygnus" and "Lepus" because 1) they had names that were obviously constellations (if I picked something like "Aries" or "Capricorn" I was worried that readers would mistake the theme to be astrological signs, or if they were "Orion" or "Cassiopeia" they'd mistake it to be mythological figures), and 2) they were complex enough to look like something (vs some constellations being like... a bent line) while simple enough to fit on the lottery balls

I'm not very knowledgable about astronomy, astrology, or mythology, so it's really cool to hear your thoughts on it!!

[gamora-borealis]

hi callie i was wondering if you had any theological thoughts about phan vs jedus, im ex-catholic and kinda agnostic-atheist but i genuinely find your perspective on religion and christianity to be refreshing :)

oh thank you it is an honor to be asked 😭💖 this got really long so my answer is under the cut:

I had to go look the story of judas up again to refresh my memory on certain details because I feel like I'm mostly familiar with the simplified sunday school version in my head (I love theology/philosophy but sometimes the nuances of all the different tellings from each gospel get mixed up or forgotten in my head lol). If you want like, in depth info on the differences in the stories or arguments among biblical historians/academics about the historicity of his story I would recommend reading the Wikipedia article about Judas because it goes in pretty good depth and gives lots of citations and quotes like actual credible scholars that I read and not crackpot evangelical "historians" who try to claim that everything that happened in the bible is somehow 100% true and try to make all the gospels fit together when they actually contradict each other lol.

but essentially the main reason people even ship jedus is because in the text judas gave jesus a special greeting kiss on the cheek in front of the romans who were looking to arrest jesus to show them which guy they were looking for (he accepted a bribe for this). like I think it's more so a modern invention to make the kiss seem homoerotic or something, which like be my guest I guess lol I love making shit gay! some gospels claim he was possessed by satan, some claim he was just in it for the money, but I think it's agreed that he regretted it afterwards and didn't actually want jesus to die and so he killed himself (or had an accident after being very distraught).

but like, if you want to get real gay, john the apostle is referred to as the disciple "that jesus loved." although I have seen it pointed out that this is a bit biased considering that line is from the gospel of john which was written down by john's followers like a hundred years later. but still, also john was the only one of the 12 disciples at Jesus's crucifixion (along with Mary Magdalene who basically was a disciple but the church has tried to cover that up because she's a woman, and his mother Mary, and some other family friends who were also named Mary lmao). so like why jesus x judas and not jesus x john?? it kinda seems like childish "hehe judas kissed him GAYYYY" over like. the actual close relationships jesus had lol.

to be fair I don't think I've ever seen jesus christ super star or any other jesus inspired musical that may or may not have contributed to this ship being popular. but at least there is probably a narrative or subtext there that leads you to want to ship them, whereas in the straight up bible I'm like. idk lol.

but real talk like. dan and phil are so very like, drawn together by the universe coded (which in the kind of non-standard theology I ascribe to, God is the universe!) and are such an uplifting entertainment duo that bring joy and hope to so many people I'm like. If God and/or Jesus had to chose, would they choose this beloved real couple or the guy who betrayed Jesus and helped get him crucified??? Like please.

(also I could write an entire treatise on why theologically god is not homophobic lol I won't get into that, but whether that includes Jesus the historical guy who existed? idk he never spoke on that - though some people think he was accepting of a roman soldier who maybe had gay relationship with a servant but that interpretation is a bit iffy - but jesus did go against a lot of gender norms at the time by being a single nomadic teacher who hung out with single women and told men to leave their families and follow him and if we think of him as theologically supposedly being at the right hand of God in heaven nowadays then they would be on the same page lol).

To get actually theological about Judas though, there are people who believe that Jesus's crucifixion was a necessary in some kind of weird sacrifice for our sins situation (academically known as penal substitutionary atonement theory) which I just don't buy into that at all lmao even though it's very popular in Christianity, especially among evangelicals. so like some people might be like "well judas had to betray in order for Jesus to die which was a good thing" but I just straight up think that's a crazy thing to accept like why did God have to violently crucify a supposed version of himself and/or son in order to forgive people of their "sins" that is such a weird convoluted way of thinking but that's what happens when people insist on believing God is all powerful and then try to justify bad things happening. Whereas I'm a fan of the movement to replace the term "omnipotent" with "amnipotent" meaning God isn't all powerful but is all loving (and there are some better translations that actually support this there is a recent book about it by Thomas Jay Oord) and be like well sometimes bad shit happens that God doesn't support but God's gonna just keep trying their best!!! so like I don't think Judas had an excuse per se but also maybe Jesus was bound to be crucified anyways not because God wanted it but because he was like, building a movement to challenge the Roman Empire even though it wasn't necessarily a violent one (more like mutual aid, dual power type stuff rather than a direct, violent revolution - which some jews at the time understandably supported although it unfortunately didn't work out for them). But this is looking back at it from modern times. At the time you could say Judas sold out Jesus to the equivalent of the CIA or FBI or something, like even if he felt bad afterwards why are we shipping them... I guess people might be like "Judas had to do it for the plot it's tragic!!!" but for what other reason are we shipping them besides the betraying kiss on the cheek that was in a different culture lol

I did see some interesting arguments in the Wikipedia article about how most historians think Judas was real but some think he could have been an antisemitic invention by Christians, there's a very big messy history of Christians, like even in the scriptures, blaming Jesus's death on the Jews in a way that is just very antisemitic and probably not true so that's another interesting aspect to this as well.

Anyways this is my perspective as someone into queer, existential, process theology/philosophy that is ultimately pretty protestant despite me being a practicing anglo-catholic episcopalian who likes saints and catholic worship and some other catholic-y things lol (episcopalians are like the bridge between protestant and catholic lol). hope this big rant made sense, I got kinda hyperfixated and haven't had addedall today and have been procrastinating eating since before I started writing this so I better go do that now 😂

[drift-compatible-poll]

Preliminary Round: Poll Runner's Choice

Ok, so this poll is gonna be a bit different. I picked six of my favorite submissions that didn't get in to put in this poll. Vote for who you would like to be in the main bracket the most, and the top three duos will be added to the bracket. So, without further ado...

Hiccup Horrendous Haddock III and Toothless(top left) vs Tsukioka Tsumugi and Takatou Tasuku(top right) vs Xingqiu and Chongyun(middle left) vs Rose Lalonde and Dave Strider(middle right) vs Mabel and Dipper Pines(bottom left) vs Lio Fotia and Galo Thymos(bottom right)

Propaganda for Hiccup and Toothless: "They literally read each others minds, they're so in sync, they trust each other so much"

Propaganda for Tsumugi and Tasuku: "they're childhood friends who started acting together in school! acting requires lots of trust in your fellow co-stars like for example if they mess up or forget a line you need to be able to cover for them and keep the show going. after years of acting they're very much in sync able to match each other's energy onstage during a performance. even the player character (default name: izumi) notes in her narration that these two have a special connection onstage that no one else in their theatre company has bc of their years of acting together <3"

Propaganda for Xingqiu and Chongyun: "They have several matching design elements that balance each other out, with Xingqiu being associated with dark blue and black while Chongyun is associated with light blue and white. Chongyun uses the ice element, while Xingqiu uses the water element, which makes them formidable (or at least troublesome, since they freeze the enemies constantly) in a team together in game. They're commonly seen or mentioned together, and while Chongyun occasionally complains about Xingqiu's pranks, they get along well enough that an entire section of Chongyun's character story (in his profile) is dedicated to his friendship with Xingqiu, and vice versa with Xingqiu's story. Chongyun is a very earnest and genuine person, while Xingqiu is a bit wily and a prankster - despite this, Chongyun trusts him over and over again, despite the trouble that Xingqiu's pranks often cause for him. sorry for submitting genshin and writing a whole wall of text lol"

Propaganda for Rose and Dave: "I'm bad explanations, but the short of it is that even though they're both very cagey people and try not to be themselves, they see through each other's façade."

Propaganda for Mabel and Dipper: "They're the bestest siblings ever. They're twins and have such a wonderful beautiful relationship. Their relationship so important for the show as a whole and Gravity Falls wouldn't be what it is if not for them. They're the reason why I strive to be a good sibling to my own brother. I've been obsessed with this show and them for so many years. They're my favourite and I love them so so much."

Propaganda for Lio and Galo: "First, the obvious- they literally co-pilot a mech during the movie, and them being in sync is required for it to function: the more they understand each other, the better they fight. Also, they're very effective foils: The ice-cold arsonist and the burning-hot firefighter, who are also (as close to canonically as Studio Trigger can get) in gay love."

[paladin-of-nerd-fandom65]

Thanks for the answers :) got some more if that’s ok?

1: is there a canon reason why Jake is named well, Jacob? What’s your Headcanon about the name?

2: besides the undertaker vs mankind hel in a cell match, what’s the duos favorite OMG moment in wrestling?

3: what’s the official name for the duo: the starburst duo, starburst duo, team starburst, etc….

4: was there another name for the duo before coming up with starburst duo?

5: what’s something the duo would laugh at every time?

6: would Chris like three despicable me movies? I say yes due to the adoption theme & maybe the fart gun weapon. ( can see Jake creating his own version of that XD)

@gothicghost2000 No problem at all my friend ;-)

1) As of this writing, sadly there hasn’t been an official documented reason for Jake’s naming in New Order by his creators so for the canonical part it is currently unknown.

That having been said, Based on a Headcanon by the ever lovely @snothing , Jakand’r translates in Tamaranean as ‘Moonfire’; more implicitly he’s named after one of Tamaran’s moons though in a bit of coincidence, it’s also a name that starts with the letter J which can fit into how both his sister and him are named after Mary and John Grayson. For more on that, that post would be right here

2) Perhaps the Duo’s OMG moments will also include but not limited to:

Cody vs Dustin Rhodes, especially it’s ending from AEW Double or Nothing 2019,

Kofi Kingston vs Bryan Danielson for the WWE Championship at Wrestlemania 35

Kurt Angle Driving a Milk Truck to the Ring then Dousing Milk all Over Steve Austin (aka Milk-O-Mania)

And lastly but never the least

Goldberg vs Brock Lesnar at Survivor Series 2016

3) I probably lean on The Phantom Star Vanguard Titans as it reflects both their place of origins and roots while making them a sub branch of the Titans via their respective connections with Dick and Kory.

4) At first they try coining the Star Phantoms as a sort of nickname for them but as time went on after the press gave them their more well known moniker, it ended up sticking to them and they accepted it, finalizing it via their Twitter account being called as such.

5) Probably videos about epic bloopers, special effects failures, and other such mishaps when it comes to big budget movies behind the scenes are a surefire guarantee in getting Chris and Jake to burst out laughing so hard. It's something of a tradition for them nearly every single time they have a sleepover.

6) Oh my yes Chris would adore those movies which is quite ironic in a sense given he's a superhero and yet the main character Gru himself starts out as a self admitted supervillain. As for the tool you describe, I see Jake taking some inspiration only instead he opts for instead gas grenades, packed with instead a compound that emits a powerful odor that can be described being 'Someone accidentally cutting the cheese at the same time a skunk walks right into the room'. Jake would use it in flushing out entire rooms are armed criminals and thugs inside a building during patrols

[animationgirl89]

SHIP WARS/My THOUGHTS ON SHIPPING IN GENERAL. (Rant/Thoughts)

"Okay. So I've Been Wanting To Make A Topic On This For Awhile Now, But I Just Never Had The Time To Really Do That And Plus, I Knew Talking About This Topic Would Probably Get People Pissed At Me. But, I Just Think This Really Needs To Be Talked About, And This Is Another Reason Why I Just Think Shipping Has Gone Too Far And Is A Problem In Some Cases. After Reading @loudhousecomicsandtales2 Rant On What's Going On With Shipping And Ships Wars In The TGAMM (Ghost And Molly McGee) Fandom, I Think It's Time For Me To Give My Thoughts On Not Only The Ship Wars Going On In Disney's Newest Show, But Also Give My Main Thoughts On Shipping & It's Problems."

"But, Before I Start..I Just Wanna Say That Nobody Out There Has To Agree With Me, We Are All Titled To Opinions. You Guys Have Your Own, Just Like How I Have Mine. But, What's Not Okay, Is To Bash And Bully Someone Just Because They Don't Like Your Opinions Or Don't Like What You Like. If You Don't Like What Nobody Has To Say, Just Scroll Away And Leave."

("Now Onto The Rant!")

Alright, So I'm Sure Alot Of You Know About Disney's Newest Show That Recently Came Out, "The Ghost And Molly McGee." But, If Some Of You Aren't, I'll Give You A Quick Recap On What TGAMM Is And It's Plot.

Ok. So, 'The Ghost And Molly McGee' Is A Animated, Musical, Comedy Supernatural Series Which Was Created By Bill Motz And Bob Roth. The Show Is About A Cheerful, Optimistic Tween Teenage Girl Named, Molly McGee, Who Is Stuck With A Grumpy Ghost Named Scratch, After She And Her Family Move To A New Home. The Duo Ends Up Forming A Friendship, After Scratch Curses Her, Which Backfires And He Ends Up Forever Bond With Molly!

Now, Ever Since TGAMM Premiered Shipping Has Already Started Happening Even Before It's Actual Premiere. After The Screening Which Was Shown, People Started Shipping Both Molly And Andrea Together, Even Though The Two Characters Really Didn't Share Any Chemistry Or Didn't Really Interact Or Have Much Development. (Which Mostly In Andrea's Case) And Let Me Tell You, People Have Already Been Stating That It'll Become The Next Lumity. But I'm Not Sure About That, Because While Yes..Amity Was A Bully, But There Was Much More To Her While With Andrea Didn't Exactly Have A Whole Lot To Her, And She Seemed Like A Jerk And Horrible Just To Be Like That, All Because Molly Pronounces Her Name Wrong.

Honestly Guys, I'm Just So Worried And Concerned For TGAMM's Future And It's Fanbase..I'm Just Worried It'll End Up Like Other Toxic Fandoms Like She Ra, Star Vs, Boku No Hero Academia/My Hero Academia And Many More Out There, And I Really Don't Want That For TGAMM! And Plus, I'm Also Just So Annoyed And Frustrated That Ship Wars Are Already Happening In The TGAMM Fanbase And It's Just So Unnecessary And Ridiculous Overall And It Just Proves That The Shipping Wars Happening Already For TGAMM Only Shows And Proves That Some People (NOT ALL!!) Only Watch Cartoons For Shipping And That's It. They Don't Care About The Characters, The Story, The Depth, Character Development, Ect..They Only Care About The Ships And That's It, It's Sad And Unfortunately And Just Plan Disheartening. And Sure, I'll Admit, I'm Someone Who Likes And Enjoys Shipping, I'm Not Gonna Sugar Code Anything Or Lie About That. BUT, That's NEVER My Main Thing To Think About Or Focus On Whenever I'm Watching A Series, No Matter If It's New Or Not!

Besides, And This Is Only My Opinion. But, When It Comes To Shipping, I Don't Wanna Start Shipping Unless Two Characters Interact More And Actually Have Real And Strong CHEMISTRY And Development!! When It Comes To Shipping, I Like My Favorite Parings (Ships I Like) To Have Chemistry, (As | Mentioned Before) Romantic Chemistry, That Shows That Whether You Are A Compatible Couple Or Not. And Showing Things Like Hugging And Such Does Not Define Chemistry Or Real Romance. (At Least, To Me)

Listen, I've Never Had Any Problems With Shipping Since I Also Ship Some Couples As Well, But I Can't Say I'm Someone Who's Obsessed With It Like Others Can Be, And I Think It's Mostly Because I Don't See Shipping Being Done Very Well At Times And Often, Since Some Romantic Couples Are Either Rushed Or Forced, Or Are Just There For Fan Service. I Don't Think Shipping Shouldn't Be Something Anyone Should ONLY Be Thinking And Focusing On When Watching A Show. And In My Opinion, It Sometimes Takes Me A Bit And Quite Alot To Get Invested And Interested In A Ship/Couple Pairing And What Matters And Means To Me Is If You Can Show Me Why Two Characters Should Be Together, And Why They Love And Care Deeply For Each Other, And Show Me (And The Audience) Well, Give Me And The Others A Reason To Care About Two Characters And Their Relationship, Give Us A Reason For Us To Get Invested In Them, And Us Wanting Them To Be Together, Ect. Don't Force It Down Our Throats Or Just Hint At It Over And Over Again Where It's Just Ridiculous And Predictable, Take Time With It And Let It Flow.

Plus, Whenever It Comes To A Show Or Movie With A Romance Couple, The Romance Has To Be And Come Across As Believable And Strong. The Audience Must Be Convinced That The Couple Is Genuinely Connected And Share A Very Strong, Beautiful Bond, And There Needs To Be A Spark Of Attraction And Connection Between Both Characters! But, Having Two Characters Kiss Or Say, "I Love You!" Isn't Enough Establish A Believable, Convincing Romantic Connection. And With Romantic Dialogue, It's Very Hard To Believe Or Even Care For, When A Relationship Between Two Characters Is Rushed And Forced, Especially When They Don't Barely Share Any Screentime Or Have Any Real Interactions.

[But As I Mentioned, I DON'T Have A Problem With Shipping Since I Also Ship Some Couples And Would Like To See Certain Characters Get Together, But I Just Can't Stand Some Toxic Shippers Who Always Try To Harass And Bully Others Into Getting What They Want Or Whenever Someone Doesn't Like Or Agree With Them, Or Like Their Paring. And I'm Sorry, But When You Get To The Point Of Harassing Someone Just Because They Don't Agree With You, That Makes You Look Like A Toxic Person And Scum Bag, And You Need Some Help And Get Off The Internet ASAP, Especially Since Some Toxic, Obsessed Shippers Out There Like To Send Death Threats To Those Who Don't Agree With Them..And It's Just So Sad And Horrible!]

[avatar-index]

Statement 5201148

Waluigi is an Avatar of the Stranger.

Honestly, I could just drop BDG’s video concerning him here and just call it a day.

Aside from his appearances on the spinoff games and the descriptions provided in the Smash Bros. games, we don’t have much confirmed information on the guy, his origins, and even his exact relationship with his partner, Wario, aside from the two hatching plans together to ensure victory via shady means. He is just one giant, walking, sentient question mark with a hat, a ‘stache, and the occasional rose between his teeth; the foremost later aligning well with the general aesthetic of the Stranger.

But before delving deeper into the Upside-Down L rabbit hole provided by what pieces of canon we could find, I think I ought to bring up his meta origins for clarity’s sake: you see, Waluigi is one of the rare characters that weren’t designed by anyone at Nintendo- not exactly, he was created by Fumihide Aoki, a designer at Camelot, with some help from Shigeru Miyamoto.

Considering the competitive air of Mario Tennis, and the fact that Wario needed some sort of partner to team up with (and for the game to have a balanced number of characters), we can boil Waluigi’s entire reason for existence down to Wario having someone to back him up during these games and for the resulting duo to contrast the Mario bros; seeing how Mario and Luigi were wearing complementary colors, he was designed with a color that clashes with Wario’s- and with Wario possessing exaggerated features of Mario’s, Waluigi is freakishly tall when compared to literally everyone else in the franchise sans Rosalina and Bowser.

After his debut in Mario Tennis, he later on reappeared in every other Super Mario spinoff game; never starring in a core game, except for a tiiiiiiny reference in the Mario and Rabbids game. This explains why he often pops up with his signature tennis racket- he is just there just so he can play games with the Mario Bros. and his partner, but, other than that, he is simply irrelevant to the main storyline.

Heck, even during development, he wasn’t exactly designed with a specific personality in mind, and it might have stayed that way if not for Charles Martinet fleshing out Waluigi’s character and, in turn, making him the goofball we all came to love and even relate to. According to mr. Martinet, it appears that Waluigi is suffering from self-loathing and has a pessimistic view on life; disarray always comes to his direction, while everyone else gets the glee and joy, leading him to wish awful things on decent people- though he himself would never commit such acts. This explains why he’s never in the core games lore-wise; battles of good vs. evil aren’t exactly his thing and he sees them as rather much pointless, so that deducts some good ol’ Desolation points. However, if Luigi were to trip after getting the boi gets a free taco, you’d bet he’d just point and laugh.

Now, onto what canon provides for us-

According to several entries on SSB, he is described as quite hardworking for a trickster and double-crosser, with his uncertain relationship with Wario being highlighted. The whole “Luigi’s rival” schtick is also implied to be a one-sided thing, considering how Luigi just appears annoyed by the sight of him in Mario Tennis. It is stated in Brawl that he spent quite a long time being in the Mario Bros’ shadows training, before finally debuting in Tennis all of a sudden and making a name for himself in these party games; recall what the Distortion spoke about the three entities at play, with the Stranger’s schtick being what was supposed to be known now hidden and even replaced.

Aside from Brawl, in another one of the Mario spinoffs, Dance Dance Revolution: Mario Mix, his entire cause for stealing the artifacts isn’t created out of active malicious intent, but is, instead, another sign of his deep self-hatred- so that he can become the best dancer in all the Mushroom Kingdom. Plus, dancing, the Unknowing, yeah.

This concludes today’s statement...but, anyone else seeing how his physique is really, really uncanny, esp in Mario standards where we have MOUNTAINS with EYES? Plus, that symbol on his hat isn’t just there for laughs- it’s a fucking Gamma “Γ“ sign.

[aion-rsa]

10 Best Fighting Game Movies

https://ift.tt/31CS0wp

Once upon a time, Bruce Lee, Jim Kelly, and John Saxon visited a crime boss’ private island to compete in a fighting tournament and it was awesome. The 1973 movie Enter the Dragon is basically the prototype for the fighting games like Mortal Kombat and Street Fighter. And when those fighting games became popular, they inspired their own movies that either tried to emulate Enter the Dragon or do something completely new.

The ‘90s gave us the cheesy live-action fighting game movies from Hollywood and the animated movies from Japan. There have been several live-action Mortal Kombat movies as well as a few animated ones. There have also been multiple Street Fighter movies, four attempts at Tekken, a trilogy of Fatal Fury films, and more.

Are most of them bad? Yes. But did we pick our 10 favorite fighting game movies anyway? You bet. Here are our picks:

10. ART OF FIGHTING (1993)

Eh…it’s harmless.

The Art of Fighting series is mostly defined by the twist that the first game’s final boss is the main character’s father and the second game’s final boss is a younger incarnation of the villain from Fatal Fury. Take away those aspects and you’re left with a rather lowkey storyline for a fighting game where a teenage girl is kidnapped by a mobster and is rescued by her brother and her boyfriend.

Wait, I said that weird. It’s two different people, I swear! Except in Capcom, where Dan Hibiki is literally both of them merged into one character.

In the 45-minute Art of Fighting movie about Ryo and Robert, who are like chiller and dopier versions of Ryu and Ken, we watch as the duo gets sucked into a plot about stolen diamonds, martial arts criminals, and angry police lieutenants. It doesn’t take itself seriously and it’s a fine, breezy watch.

Ryo’s incorrect hair color kind of irks me, though.

9. STREET FIGHTER ALPHA: THE ANIMATION (1999)

This movie suffers from the same problem as Fatal Fury: The Motion Picture. It features a cast of heroes from a fighting game taking on a villain created for the movie instead of the villains we actually give a shit about. But the movie does also have some brief but awesome cameos (Kim Kaphwan and Geese Howard from Fatal Fury and Dan Hibiki and Akuma from Street Fighter Alpha) to brighten up a less-than-stellar plot.

Street Fighter Alpha: The Animation does at least get by because the original characters play up Ryu’s whole fear about being overcome by “the Dark Hadou.” This leads to some cool animations where Evil Ryu looks like a mindless, shambling zombie but also an unstoppable fighting machine.

The movie’s main storyline is about a kid named Shun who claims that he’s Ryu’s long-lost brother. He too is a fighter cursed with an inner dark side, which is used as a red herring to suggest that Shun’s father (and presumably Ryu’s father) is actually Akuma. That ends up being bupkis and Shun is just linked to some scheme by a mad scientist or whatever.

Probably the funniest thing about this movie is the directors’ infatuation with Chun-Li’s midsection. She’s wearing her form-fitting Street Fighter Alpha costume and there are dozens upon dozens of random close-ups to her lower torso from the front and back. If this were a drinking game, it would kill you.

8. FATAL FURY 2: THE NEW BATTLE (1993)

Of the Fatal Fury movie trilogy, this one is easily the best, even if it makes all the good guys seem like a bunch of overly-serious crybabies. The basic story is that after having avenged his father’s death, Terry hits rock bottom, dusts himself off, and comes out the other end stronger. Good, good. Going Rocky III is the perfect direction for a follow-up.

The problem is that Terry comes off as a bit of a whiner and the other heroes try way too hard to vilify the movie’s main antagonist, who hasn’t actually done anything that terrible. Krauser shows up one day, challenges Terry to a fight, wins, and says, “Okay, when you get better, train and fight me again.” Krauser isn’t trying to take over the world or murder orphans or whatever. He’s just a dude with huge shoulder armor who wants a good fight.

But everyone acts like Krauser’s the absolute worst. Terry starts drinking and falls to pieces while his buddies hope to get revenge. What a bunch of jerks.

While a fun romp, the worst thing about this sequel is how they redesigned Krauser. Gone is his mustache and forehead scar for the sake of making him seem younger. Kind of a bullshit move, considering he’s supposed to be the half-brother to middle-aged Geese Howard.

7. TEKKEN: THE MOTION PICTURE (1998)

This hour-long anime is almost great but just can’t stick the landing. It runs into the same problem as Mortal Kombat: Annihilation where the game series tells a specific overall story but the movie cuts corners to tell the same story. Tekken: The Motion Picture covers the first Tekken while setting up Tekken 3 and skipping Tekken 2 completely.

It means that everything’s well and good until the confusing and rushed finale. Otherwise, the movie is a fine use of the Enter the Dragon formula. Heihachi Mishima has a special island fighting tournament and the entrants include his vengeful son, a couple of cops investigating the situation, a gigantic robot, an angry Native American girl, two feuding assassin sisters, and a bunch of awesome characters who only get about three full frames of appearances each. Really would have liked to see something from Paul, King, and Yoshimitsu, though.

Other than Kazuya being pissed at everything, the best scenes are the over-the-top ones. When Jack does crazy robot stuff, when dinosaurs show up and start eating people, and that memorable sequence where Heihachi catches a hatchet with his mouth and then shatters it with his jaw.

6. STREET FIGHTER (1994)

I know this movie is just a GI Joe script with Street Fighter names pasted over it. I know it’s a cheesefest of dopey ideas and Belgian accents. I’ve long accepted that. Thing is, the movie is still a total blast to watch. What it lacks in faithfulness to the source material, it makes up for with pure camp and ham.

The 16 characters from Super Street Fighter II are represented here, except Fei Long is replaced with the forgettable Captain Sawada. How ironic that the movie star character isn’t even in the movie!

In general, the movie features some head-scratching depictions of classic Street Fighter characters. All-American Guile is played by Jean Claude Van Damme, Charlie Nash and Blanka are the same character, Dee Jay is an evil hacker, Ryu and Ken are comedic conmen, and Dhalsim is a frumpy scientist.

It’s Raul Julia’s M. Bison who keeps this guilty pleasure afloat. He’s to Street Fighter what Frank Langella’s Skeletor was to Masters of the Universe. He gives 110% and his performance is easily the best reason to watch this movie. It’s truly a wonder to behold.

Read more

Games

The Forgotten Fighting Games of the 1990s

By Gavin Jasper

Games

King of Fighters: Ranking All the Characters

By Gavin Jasper

The movie is infamous for inspiring a fighting game based on it, but you know what nobody ever talks about? The Double Dragon movie also had a fighting game based on it made by Technos and released on the Neo Geo. And Double Dragon wasn’t even a one-on-one fighter to begin with!

Anyway, if you intend to sit back and watch Street Fighter, make sure to add in the RiffTrax commentary.

5. DOA: DEAD OR ALIVE (2006)

Enter the Dragon meets Charlie’s Angels is a heck of a concept, but DOA: Dead or Alive is so confidently tongue-in-cheek that it succeeds as an action comedy that’s way better than it has any right to be. Part of why it works is that Dead or Alive has never had much of an overarching storyline, but is more defined by the individual characters (plus, you know, all the cheesecake). Enough of those characters appear in what’s your regular “fighting tournament on a mysterious island” setup.

The whole thing moves with such energy that it’s easy to get sucked in. It’s the opposite of the live-action Tekken movie, where even though the film features accurate versions of all the characters, everything is so drab and lifeless that you just can’t wait for it to be over. In DOA, the combatants spend their downtime playing cartoony action volleyball with Fake Dennis Rodman on commentary, while in Tekken everyone mopes about dystopian capitalism.

Other than Helena’s character being “important dead guy’s daughter,” most of the main characters are charismatic enough to keep your attention during the 3% of the movie when fights aren’t happening. It must suck for Ninja Gaiden fans that Hayabusa is depicted as a total dweeb, but he at least gets to do some cool stuff here and there.

The movie also has Kevin Nash playing a character based on Hollywood Hogan and he’s so likeable that I’m genuinely bummed that he peaces out about halfway into the movie. Luckily, the movie is entertaining enough that I didn’t even notice until after it was over. It helps that during that time, we get more of Eric Roberts, his amazing hair, and his special sunglasses that turn him into the ultimate martial arts master.

Spoiler alert, but the secret to defeating him is, get this, removing his sunglasses!

4. MORTAL KOMBAT LEGENDS: SCORPION’S REVENGE (2020)

It took a while, but Warner Bros. Animation is on fire these days. After that Batman vs. TMNT movie and Teen Titans Go vs. Teen Titans, the studio appears to be hitting more than they miss. That’s exactly the kind of team needed to put together the latest animated Mortal Kombat movie.

This is the umpteenth retelling of the first game’s story. Not only does it have to compete with the first live-action movie, but also the events of Mortal Kombat 9, which depicts the tournament in cutscene format. Fortunately, Scorpion’s Revenge has a few tricks up its sleeve. First, it puts Scorpion in the forefront as the protagonist. He was barely a character in the original movie and the game just had him kill Sub-Zero and feel bad about it for the rest of the story mode. Now he feels like a character in a crossover, making a mark on the original story instead of being put in the sidelines.

We also have the wonderful stunt casting of Joel McHale as Johnny Cage. More importantly, Jennifer Carpenter plays Sonya Blade, which is such a step up from Ronda Rousey’s voice acting in Mortal Kombat 11.

This cartoon has a very hard R when it comes to violence. From the very beginning, Scorpion’s origins are gruesome and grisly. Once Jax is introduced, it doesn’t take long until we realize, “Oh, that’s how they’re dealing with THAT plot point in this continuity.” Then there’s a surprise villain death late in the movie that not only comes as a shocking development, but it’s so graphic and nasty that you can’t help but be taken aback.

Scorpion’s Revenge is a fantastic first chapter of what is hopefully a series of animated movies, but it does have its pacing issues. Scorpion being the protagonist may be a welcome change, but at times it does feel like a square peg being crammed into a round hole.

3. TEKKEN: BLOOD VENGEANCE (2011)

One of the best things about the Tekken series is the endings. While the cutscenes from the first couple games haven’t exactly aged well, these CGI epilogues have become a staple in nearly every installment. What better reward for your time and success than watching a rocking action sequence with Yoshimitsu and Bryan Fury killing each other in the jungle?

And so, to play to the series’ strengths, Bandai Entertainment released a Tekken movie that’s really just one big ending cutscene. It’s not canon, but it feels at home with the games.

Since Tekken’s main conflict is with two ruthless megalomaniacs (Heihachi and Kazuya) and a disgruntled nihilist (Jin), it’s hard to treat any of them as a real protagonist here. Instead, they go with Ling Xiaoyu, who is portrayed as the person who sees the good in Jin and wants him to see the light. She’s given a robotic BFF in Alisa Bosconovitch because Xiaoyu is kind of a tame character and needs someone with chainsaw arms and a jetpack to liven things up.

The first hour or so is good enough to keep your attention and its lightened up by a couple appearances by Tekken’s best character, Lee. But once it gets to the third act, it just becomes a completely awesome Heihachi vs. Kazuya vs. Jin fight, with Xiaoyu taking a backseat to watch all the crazy shit going on. It’s a full-on fireworks factory, as we not only see Devil forms of Kazuya and Jin but a very special final form for Heihachi that’s a true delight for Tekken fans.

2. STREET FIGHTER II: THE ANIMATED MOVIE (1994)

Let it be said that for someone who grew up in the ‘80s and ‘90s, finding a faithful cartoon adaptation of a video game property was not easy. Link and Simon Belmont were unlikable sexual harassers. Mega Man was a more annoying sidekick than Scrappy Doo. Mario and Luigi teamed up with Milli Vanilli. Power Team was…a thing. When we got an animated movie based on Street Fighter II, it was mind-blowing. This was a movie where the very first scene was Ryu tearing Sagat’s chest into a bloody gash thanks to a well-animated Shoryuken.

There’s a lot going on in this movie, but at the same time, nothing is going on. By this point, there were 17 characters in the various Street Fighter II games, and outside of a blink-and-you’ll-miss-it Akuma cameo, it feels the need to include every single one of them. Some get minor roles, like Cammy and Dee Jay. Then there’s Zangief and Blanka, who fight each other for no reason other than for the sake of giving them something to do. Even Ryu vanishes for a huge chunk of the runtime.

Once everything funnels into the third act, this movie is great. And the earlier fight scenes are straight fire too, including the memorable Chun-Li vs. Vega brawl. Even though the movie already feels true to Street Fighter II, it’s even better when you realize that it’s all supposed to be a prequel to the game itself.

Or at least I hope so. Otherwise, all Sagat gets to do is get his ass kicked by Ryu and get chewed out by Bison.

1. MORTAL KOMBAT (1995)

The stars truly aligned for this one. Mortal Kombat Mania was at its peak, so it makes sense that this movie was a retelling of the first game’s story with added aspects from the second game, all while hyping up the arcade release of the third game. CGI was such a novelty in Hollywood in the ’90s that even if it looked primitive, it still looked cutting edge at the time. It was the perfect time to release this movie.

But Mortal Kombat isn’t perfect. Reptile is embarrassing. Scorpion and Sub-Zero being relegated to goons still stings. I still roll my eyes at the part towards the end where Sonya is suddenly the damsel in distress and Raiden flat-out verbally buries her by saying she couldn’t beat Shang Tsung in a million years. Otherwise, it’s the perfect storm of ‘90s action garbage.

There are so many over-the-top and charismatic performances here. Johnny Cage, Raiden, Shang Tsung, Kano, and even Goro are a blast to watch. All 10 characters from the original game are given something to do and, most importantly, they realize how uniquely weird the game’s story is and actually dive headfirst into it. The movie isn’t embarrassed to be a Mortal Kombat movie but handles itself well enough that we aren’t embarrassed to be watching a Mortal Kombat movie.

Even with a PG-13 rating, the movie was violent enough. Kano talked up seeing a pile of frozen guts in the wake of a Sub-Zero fight, Scorpion got his skull sliced apart with demon brain goo spewing all over the place, and Shang Tsung got impaled to death.

With the reboot being rated R, going for the gore could very well be the right route to go, but for the love of the Elder Gods, don’t forget to have FUN. All I’m saying is, if even Johnny Cage isn’t hamming it up, then what’s the point?

The post 10 Best Fighting Game Movies appeared first on Den of Geek.

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[waynedunlaptheorgandonor]

alpha/beta are carol/daryl foils: an analysis no one asked for; twd s10 spoilers, obviously

hoo boy. okay, so i’ve been intending to write this for days, but i had to let it marinate, and also i haven’t been sleeping and couldn’t concentrate long enough to write it down, but whatever, i digress. “we are the end of the world” was something, wasn’t it?? it is so weird to have a plotline in twd that’s like...good? and SO refreshing to have a villain who isn’t a macho, rapey, white dude. i personally believe that all showrunners should be women from now on. oh, i’m digressing again, my apologies.

here’s the actual content, under the cut bc it’s a fucking novel:

so, from alpha’s very first episode, when i saw her shaving her head, i literally thought, “oh, so she’s carol’s foil and they’re going to have an inevitable showdown, huh?” guess who was right? this bitch. but what i didn’t catch right away was how beta is also daryl’s foil, and how the main focus of this season is alpha/beta vs carol/daryl.

let’s take it apart individually first, yeah?

carol vs. alpha:

like i said, the scene that made me instantly aware of what they were setting up was when alpha shaved her head. carol’s hair was a big thing in season 9, and the fact that we had just had henry talking about carol growing her hair out long, juxtaposed with alpha shaving hers off, is what set the alarm bells off for me. i have said over and over that i don’t believe kang does anything unintentionally, and girl loves her symbolism, so those two opposing scenes was a taste of what she was setting up.

carol and alpha are both near-indestructible forces who also happen to be mother’s suffering the loss of their children at the hand of the other. (carol isn’t directly responsible for lydia, but she’s included with “the others” that took lydia from alpha, so i think alpha still sees her as part of it.)

carol and alpha both have transformed themselves to fit within the confines of the world they currently live in, while recognizing that their children weren’t meant for it, even within their own grief. let us refer to figures a and b (lol) below.

figure a:

here in “the grove” we have creepy girl who i hate and am terrified of asking carol if sophia died because she was weak, and carol straight up is like, “yes.” she doesn’t even sugarcoat it. she accepted that her daughter wasn’t going to survive from the jump, because “there wasn’t a mean bone in her body.”

figure b:

here we see alpha losing her goddamn shit, because she’s having a come-to-jesus moment with beta about losing lydia, because she can’t have lydia and be the alpha at the same time, because lydia “is not like” her. 

conclusion: carol and alpha both mourn for their daughters, but have accepted that to be the people they need to be in the apocalypse, their children needed to die (or in lydia’s case, be dead metaphorically). in short, carol and alpha are two sides of the same coin. they’ve both found ways to survive, except one is for the good guys, and the other is for the bad guys, and now they’re head-to-head, and it is d e l i c i o u s.

moving on.

daryl vs beta:

idk why the parallels didn’t occur to me when they had daryl fighting beta. i blame henry, he was distracting me by being a delightful idiot (rip my dumb bitch), but that seed was planted in season 9, too. go kang for continuity. who knew twd could do that? anyway.

the big thing that compares daryl and beta is who they were before they found carol and alpha respectively. we obviously don’t know a whole lot of details about beta’s life, but we have enough to extrapolate and compare, and extrapolate and compare we shall.

alright, so we got our favorite lovable, filthy redneck, who grew up abused and isolated, and then here comes the apocalypse, and the only person he has left is his brother, and that’s what defines him until he loses him, both when rick chained him to a roof, and then again, after a brief relapse, when merle sacrificed himself. 

next we have beta, who again, our info is limited, but he does not become “beta” until after whoever that walker alpha puts down is gone. judging by the size, approximate age, and the closeness beta had to him, i’m betting on, you guessed it, his brother. 

observe:

figure a:

figure b:

these are both turning points for these men, where they Fully Become the dudes that we know. daryl couldn’t be the daryl we know and love until merle was gone for good, and whatever his actual name is couldn’t become beta until smiley face shirt guy was smooshed. 

(side note: how fucking rank does that t-shirt have to be by now? at least the mask dries out, but do you think that t-shirt is just like, melded into beta’s skin at this point? gross.)

so time for the fun part.

alpha/beta and caryl in season 10:

season 10 finds both duos in similar circumstances, by which i mean, alpha and carol are losing their minds, and beta and daryl are like, “uhhhh, you ok?” the men are these women’s confidants, their person, the one they trust and love above all others. carol saved daryl and brought him into a community, and alpha did the same thing with beta. you want more visual aides? well, sure thing, scout!

figure a:

we’re carylers, we already know carol’s the reason daryl has the confidence and self-esteem to become part of the group, but juxtapose this with the following pic, which i will label

figure b (again):

and you will see that alpha sees something in beta that no one else does. she sees this lonely, talented man, who’s adrift and in solitude, and she essentially calls dibs. sound familiar? inorite?

so daryl and beta are now loyal to a fault to their women, and this season already has them being wary of how they’re acting. yes, i have more pictures. i like taking screenshots, okay?

figure a:

one of the first scenes we get with caryl is daryl asking carol if she’s still thinking about alpha, and if she is Dwelling, which is interesting, because...

figure b:

...that’s exactly the same thing we get with alpha and beta. the first scene in “we are the end of the world” with the two of them in present day is him questioning her motives, and then later on he’s like, “fuck, are you Dwelling?” 

and both women immediately are like:

and neither dude knows wtf to do about this, because they’re used to the women being the strong ones. carol’s whole, “you’ve got to feel it, but not me, i’m good repressing, conceal don’t feel” thing, mixed with alpha’s, “we’re living like the dead and the dead don’t feel emotions so obviously I Am Fine” motto is what their boys are used to, but suddenly carol is hallucinating dead children, and alpha is making shrines, and our poor dudes are like, “plz stop???” esp bc they know these women are FUCKING TERRIFYING, and should never be left to their own devices if they’re being crazy crackers.

ergo, both men are clinging to the hope that they can bring the women back from the brink. my last visual aides, yes i know, how sad:

figure a:

figure b:

both scenes have these dudes reaching out to their women and essentially expressing, in their own way, “i’m worried about you, can you plz stay within eyesight at all times, ilu,” bc neither daryl nor beta is equipped to have a nice long sit down conversation about feelings, and obviously carol and alpha wouldn’t bother to entertain it in the first place, so like  ¯\_(ツ)_/¯. they tried. 

will it work? unlikely! because after that showdown at the end of both eps 1 and 2, these bitches ain’t about to stop for nothing. they just straight up made enemies for life, and they’re going straight harry potter with this shit, neither can live while the other survives, someone has to die, and while beta and daryl are not super on board with this whole “being bonkers and bent on revenge” thing, you better bet your ass that they’re going to make sure their woman is the winner, which means they automatically are paired up against one another as well.

so in a nutshell: we could have just stuck goatees on mmb and norman reedus, cast them as alpha and beta, and called them mirror!verse caryl (star trek reference, yay/nay?), because they’re mother fucking foils setting up for the mother fucking fight of the century, and oh my god, can you feel it in your bones how exciting it is that it’s not going to be a rick + negan dick measuring contest again? i am So Hype.

and ofc, as a hardcore caryl shipper, i obviously have to throw in that alpha and beta are totally in love (which is esp fun, bc whisperers aren’t supposed to feel love, uh oh, vulcan violation, yes i made another star trek reference, bite me), and if they are paralleling caryl, well...extrapolate from the evidence.

i love kang, you guys. i love how she tells a story. i love that she knows how to tell a story. this show is good again, and idk how she did it, but damnit, she did.

thus endeth my pointless critical analysis. forgive me. i was an english major and have absolutely no other use for my degree.

i’m ashamed too. 

that’s all. tomorrow is the early release of the caryl episode, i mean the new episode. looking forward to dying a valiant death with the lot of you. until then, friends.

deuces,

-diz

addendum: i was editing this, and was trying to think if there’s a parallel to the bracelet scene, and the only thing i could think of that alpha gives beta is his mask. she encourages him to take the face of his brother(?), and that keeps him grounded, which is interesting, bc my prediction for the bracelet is that it’s going to end up being a grounding device for carol when she’s dissociating. i don’t have a solid conclusion drawn there, but i thought i’d mention it before posting, just to plant the seed. 

k, done 4 real, bye

[just-slide]

Rise of Skywalker - Finn is the Light Side

ALRIGHT buckle up here’s meta literally none of y’all asked for. Spoilers under the cut.

Precis: I don’t think Finn was as hard done by as some do (but still deserved better).  Cards on the table of my various opinions, because this is Tumblr and people need to know my biases so they can skip out if they don’t approve: I liked the movie, I always adored Rey and Finn as a duo in any form, and I always appreciated Kylo Ren as a villain.

So let’s get some shit out the way: I did not care for That Kiss. I did not care for TLJ deciding that 90% of Rey’s arc was her suddenly trying to redeem sad white boy Kylo Ren. The fact that Finn and Rey’s stories had been heavily intertwined in TFA only for them to be dropped as a Main Duo always vexed me. I felt TROS tried to recapture some of that but the die had already been cast that the trilogy was now about Rey and Kylo, and no longer Rey and Finn vs Evil. Thanks to Rian Johnson for benching his black male lead.

However, I’ve read criticisms saying all Finn did in TROS was run around, yell Rey’s name, and remain sidelined as a supporting character. Did he deserve more than that? Yes. Was I disappointed that, while his Force Sensitivity was proven, it didn’t really culminate in anything? Yes.

But the guy walked around all movie as the physical representation of the Light Side, especially for Rey and her conflict - which was the movie’s conflict of Light vs Dark. So I have opinions on why Finn wasn’t quite as screwed over as people think and the internet needs to know them.

Let’s break this down: Rey only ever spoke about her visions of temptation to him, where he issued repeated assurances of her strength and goodness (and yes, she was Emo in response about ‘nobody knowing her’ but let’s not forget that the narrative of the story held out that 1: Finn was right about her and 2: Ergo Finn did know her).

It becomes more overtly symbolic in all 3 of her confrontations with Kylo. When they’re fighting over Chewie’s transport, Rey is physically positioned between Kylo and Finn, one driving her to the Dark, one calling her back to the Light (could Finn have not, like, shot Kylo? I feel he should have at least tried. It would have made me feel better). On the Star Destroyer above Kijimi, when Kylo offers her his hand the second time and she refuses him, she leaps to the Falcon, away from the offer of the Dark Side and literally into Finn’s waiting grasp. And on Endor, even when Finn chasing her onto the Death Star is plot-wise completely meaningless. Its meaning comes in when Rey, in her fury, Force Pushes him back. Because he’s the bloody representation of the Light Side, her Light, and she didn’t want any of that getting in the way of her vengeful lashing out.

I agree the movie should have done a better job of demonstrating Rey’s reciprocated affection for Finn, in that he chased her a lot and she didn’t much respond to these efforts. For Finn, we get his spoken affection - for Rey, we have to go to the subtext. That he was the only one she voiced her fears and visions to. All of my above points, which are deliberate film-making choices and position Finn as more than just ‘one of her friends’ among the found family Palpatine confirms she’s made. The final Trio Hug was, yes, a Trio, but the framing emphasised Rey and Finn more. It felt like the movie really wanted them to be a majorly important dynamic but couldn’t quite stick the landing. An actual scene between just the two of them at the end, even if it had been them getting their own hug before Poe showed up (Trio Hug very important), considering they hadn’t seen each other since Rey rejected Finn on Endor (not Poe), would have gone a long way to resolving their somewhat aborted arc. This didn’t need to be romantic, so much as if they had Finn being this champion of Rey’s Light Side that she pushed away, we really needed something of them coming back together. Especially after he sensed her death. That was the bare minimum the movie should have done if they weren’t going to take further steps to develop their dynamic as less one-sided.

And who am I kidding; it was outright racism that Finn was sidelined after TFA and Finnrey was never canon. Many people of my acquaintance keep lamenting how Stormpilot never happened, and that is a crying shame. But Stormpilot arose out of excellent chemistry and acting from Boyega and Isaac. The Force Awakens, on the other hand, pretty much explicitly set up the romantic beats between Rey and Finn, and while we’ll never know for sure, I would bet my house that if Finn were white, we’d have got that. But they refused to deliver an interracial romance in Star Wars between a male black major character and a white female lead (much better for it to be between two white people even when one of them’s a mass murderer, huh?). Stormpilot was a grassroots effort which never took off because Disney are cowards. Finnrey was specifically set up in their own movies and never paid off also because Disney are cowards. I hate making it seem like I’m competing these two issues, but people can be mad about two things and should be mad about the racism as well as the homophobia that impacted these choices by Disney.

I guess I never thought Disney would ever make two of their major characters gay on screen. I thought first that they would, then that they could, keep centering a black man in Star Wars in an interracial romance with a white woman (which is, for many reasons, more subversive and challenging than white men in romances with black women in media). Oh look, I was unable to get through this screed about Light and Dark and how much I liked a particular element of this movie without descending into ‘fuck you and your racism, Disney.’ I still liked this movie, and despite having just gone on a rant supporting Finn’s role in TROS, it is unavoidable that the way the trilogy has treated Finn and John Boyega since TFA has been utterly shameful. TROS should have done a better job of fixing the damage of TLJ.

But Finn still got the be the Light Side made Manifest for our protagonist in her internal conflict between good and evil, and that’s not nothing.

[justanotherprowrestlingblog]

This wasn’t planned, but i actually had some free time so i decided to spend it by coming up for a little column, where i’ll give you “My Two Cents” on something... so today we start with the 2018 Superstar Shake Up*

From Smackdown to Raw:

Jinder Mahal: First move in the Shake up and a very predictable one because usually WWE loves to switch secondary champions between SD and Raw and they did that with Mahal but not with Rollins as i thought while watching the beginning of the show...because Jinder lost the title to Jeff Hardy who got then traded to SD the following day. Mahal on raw could be a good move if he stays away from the Universal title picture.

Riott Squad: Since their debut, they didn't do much and maybe moving them to Raw could be a good move if they also get to be treated less like a women's job squad and more like a serious treat for the division. Ruby and Sarah could have some good matches with the likes of Sasha, Bayley, Alexa, Ember and even Ronda, while Liv is still very green for me but actually showed some sights of improvement in the squared circle

Sami Zayn and Kevin owens: Another predictable move and it makes sense storyline wise that they got picked up by Stephanie to punish Angle for his actions as GM. Now it will be interesting to see what they are gonna do with them: keep them as a tag team, going singles but still friends, feuding with each other like old times. Many options and potentially a great move for Raw

Breezango: Personally not a great pick for Raw, which actually got his tag team division weaker after the shake up but we will see why later. They defeated the Bar on Raw but personally i don't feel like WWE wants to give them more than just a random win in and there, but i hope they can rebuild them and make them more legit.

Natalya: Nattie did her time on SD and it's a good move to send her to Raw, where she can work with everyone and help the newcomers. She will 100% work with Ronda in a couple of weeks and potentially it could be a good match.

Dolph Ziggler&Drew McIntyre: well...this came outta nowhere because i wasn't even expecting Drew to be on Raw and watching him joining forces with Ziggler is kinda weird but i'm sure in the next weeks they will give us a reason why they are friends. Many people see in them the new “Shawn Michaels-Diesel” duo but Ziggler wishes he could be as good as HBK and Nash can say the same about McIntyre. No matter what will happen to their team, they are both two very solid picks for Raw and McIntyre going full heel, maybe with his old gimmick, would be pure gold. Also #BringBackBrokenDreams

The Ascension: I'm happy they're still employed with the WWE but i feel like their stint on Raw won't last too much...

Baron Corbin: Could this be Corbin's big break after losing the MITB Briefcase last summer? Personally it might be, he is the kind of athlete that WWE loves and with a good booking he could become a big star. He still needs to improve in the ring but in the past we had the Great Khali as World Heavyweight Champion so it's not a big problem. I can already smell Corbin facing Reigns soon

Zack Ryder: i'll say the same i said about the Ascension, but personally they have the possibility to bring back the team of Hawkins and Ryder and i hope they'll do it because it could be a good addiction to the Raw Tag Team Division. They'll never win the titles again but at least it's better than what they would do as singles.

Mike Kanellis: he deserves more than he did in WWE. Kanellis-Bennett is a great wrestler and i loved his TNA stint as the Miracle. WWE can bring him back to at least the level where he could be a good midcarder rather than a prestigious jobber. If his wife Maria will come back on screen (which i doubt, because she has a daughter now..congrats btw) i think it could help him a lot, they could do what Zelina Vega and Andrade Cien Almas (even tho Almas is better than Bennett as a wrestler) did on NXT

Chad Gable:Quite a shocking move because i never thought they would split him from Benjamin, but i see it as a very interesting and wise move because now we can have an American Alpha Reunion or having Gable going to be the “new Kurt Angle” kind of wreslter and Gable is such an underrated performer who needs the spotlight and the chance to have a big break.

Mojo Rawley: I see Mojo in the future as a good midcarder, he is an ok performer and personally i like him but sometimes he gets to much shit from the fanbase. I'm not saying he is or he will be an excellent performer, but at least he needs a chance to prove his doubters wrong. He seems to have some charisma and mic skill, now he needs to show something workrate wise.

Bobby Roode: Last but not least wrestler that went from SD Live to Raw, we have Bobby Roode and i think it's finally time to turn him heel and bring back the real Glorious One or even the IT Factor Roode we saw on Impact. He is a great pick up for Raw and he can do basically anything and he will do great Stuff for the red brand. Raw got indeed Glorious...

From Raw to Smackdown Live:

The Miz: What a lovely time for Miz to get drafted to SD Live when Daniel Bryan got back in the squared circle. Miz on SD can easily be the star of the brand i predict him to win or the MITB or the title by the end of year...but first he might have to substain a few kick from Bryan...

Jeff Hardy: As i said in the Raw after mania, i hoped for Hardy to be splitted from his brother matt so they could do their stuff and sending Jeff to SD is a great move because you have a guy who can work with anyone and they have a always ready uppercard for any occasion when you need one. Also Jeff bring some star power to the brand for the casual fans

Absolution: With Paige being the SD GM, it made sense for Mandy and Sonya to get drafted to SDLive. And also it made more sense to send them to SD after the Riott Squad got sent on Raw.They won't do much to be fair, unless we get some women's tag titles.

Samoa Joe: Huge move: Joe on Smackdown will finally have the right place where he can steal the show and being the good old samoan submission machine. I'm already hyped for the possible matches with the likes of Bryan, Styles and even Orton, as Joe said he always wanted to face Orton. Great idea from WWE to send Joe on SD, i'm less happy that i won't see him in Turin in may but that's life and he is more important for SD rather than Raw.

Sanity: Another very solid pick up for SDLive because they bring so much stuff for the show: EY can be a main eventer-uppercard, they could have Dain do the same, they could go for the titles thanks to the freebird rule. Nikki Cross with them is a bit of a bummer at the moment but i'd say there is a reason why she hasn't yet called up on the main roster and she will be probaly called up around SummerSlam. Let's hope she won't get repackaged because that won't help her at all.

Big Cass: i honestly don't like Cass, he is not my kind of wrestler but i'll give him a chance to prove me wrong because so far he has done nothing on NXT and Raw and this could his moment to show something rather than he is 7' tall. Let's see if he will do something with Bryan

Asuka: With the shake up, they made Asuka's move to SDLive official and she can be easily the next champion and get some payback for her loss at Mania with Charlotte. Asuka vs Becky is actually one of my few personal dream matches that could be huge with the right scenario and booking.

R-Truth: another guy i'm happy he's still employed with the company but at this stage i see him retiring soon and becoming a road agent/producer for SD Live. He won't bring much to SD as an active performer.

Luke Gallows&Karl Anderson: the division on SD live is now very stacked so i don't see them being involved in the title picture soon, but i see them reforming something WWE called once “a very famous club in Japan” with someone who is at the moment the WWE Champion..too sweet right?

The Bar: I hope they get to be tag team champions also on Smackdown but personally i predict them to split soon and give SD two new single wrestler who basically can do anything.

Zelina Vega&Andrade Cien Almas: outta nowhere, we get Zelina and ELLLL IDOOOLOOOO on SD Live and this is huge for the blue brand. I loved what they did on NXT and i see them doing the same on SD Live, but this time with the likes of AJ Styles, Daniel Bryan, Shinsuke Nakamura and even more. My god...what a time to be alive...NXT lost a big name but SD gained a future star.

Overall:I feel WWE did a good job with this Shake Up because they actually balanced their roster, gave us some new fresh faces, some new fresh feuds and also brought back some interest to SD Live, that in the last weeks felt a bit stale and boring to watch. NXT suffered the more but they are the brand where they are supposed to build people from scratches and send them to the main roster when they are ready for Raw and SD.

*In this shake up analysis, i haven't included they guys and girls who debuted(Lashley made his return) on Raw and SD during the AfterMania episodes and i already talked about them

[rinovarka]

some little known scifi books i  have read and what i think of them

(Scifi in regards to like, aliens and robots. Not dystopias such as 451 or 1984, or oddballs like SH5, or medicine/biology like Frankenstein, though I certainly COULD do short reviews on them, tho those are well known…This list will be expanded the more I read lol)

The Wild Robot by Peter Brown

The story of this one revolves around a ROZZUM (ha, love the archaic R.U.R reference there) robot named Ros, who emerges from a crate lost at sea. She learns how to survive in the wild and understand animals and live among them, gaining a son and friends along the way. Pacewise, the story goes by somewhat slowly. Some themes briefly encountered are technology vs nature and “the circle of life”. The simplistic art implies that the robots in this world are high tech, but designed in a retro fashion, which I think is a cute choice! If you are looking for action, this book, and The Wild Robot Escapes, is NOT for you. If you are looking for heavy scifi, this and the second book are NOT for you.

The Wild Robot Escapes by Peter Brown

This is a sequel to The Wild Robot, which deals with Ros in human society. She goes through different facets, from rural to urban, and has some thoughts of morality along he way. Pacewise, this goes very quickly. Very. All the thoughts of Ros that could have some deep thought into it do not get expanded upon. Themes briefly encountered are technology vs humanity, do robots have feelings/morality, should robots have rights, and etc. Personally, I would have been fine had the story taken a darker tone with these themes, but given this book duo was written for young audiences, I am not surprised. 

(Not spoilery, but Ros encounters robot workers in a sewer and acknowledges that they may never go to the surface, only working in the sewage until they basically broke down. As well, she learns that odd robots such as herself are melted for “public safety”, and even notes that all she wants to do is go home and isn’t a threat. For me, this leaves me wanting to write my own thoughts on this, but through my own plans…)The ending is sweet hearted, but does leave for room for more story in he future.

Robot in the Garden by Deborah Install

This story is kind of an oddball. Our main character is Ben who is on the verge of a divorce with his wife because of his lack of resolve to do anything, and he eventually sets out on a journey to help a dilapidated retro robot named Tang that showed up in his garden and caused the wife to leave. There is some domestic squabbling and some minor adult humor, and settings and events that just kind of happen by random chance. However, Tang’s origin is discovered, the human relational problem gets solved, and its all light hearted and kind of cute. 

Not to vague any characters but, a lot of times when there is a quirky, sort of annoying yet endearing character in stories, the character is really just there to be a “cute” factor to get the attention of a general audience. Tang here actually is his own character, and is annoying in a childlike way, but serves a plot purpose, and goes through their own personal growth. 

If you are looking for action or heavy sci fi, this is NOT for you. The sci fi aspect of the world itself is not expanded upon beyond the fact that there are androids and robots. Many themes found in robot and human stories are not really developed here. A few are noted, but even less so that in The Wild Robot Escapes, in my opinion.

The Rapture Effect by Jeffrey A Carver

The setting in this story is incredibly interesting, what appears to be a country in futuristic South America, with all kinds of lights and technology. Our main cast is diverse in nature, and include a Brazilian architect/dancer, a Hawaiian art director, a Native American undercover overthrow-the-government agent, and etc. We also have an AI who turns from their moraless “destroy all alien” manufactured default to a very young-minded, very anxiety-riddled, naive AI system who yearns to learn about the world. 

The story itself is interesting, as we have a human vs alien war that humanity doesn’t know about until it’s almost too late, and we even get some insight into the alien’s way of life. We get perspectives into the alien’s lives, our main character’s lives, space traveler lives, and our world wide long AI’s perspectives. Such scenes include including running away from the government into a guerilla camp out, attack by rabid monsters, space warfare, and technological tinkerings.

HOWEVER, this story has a lot of issues. As much as I love the details about machines and aliens, it is somewhat confusing, and drags on for pages. Flat, stereotyped characterization is here, from basically all the women characters, to “sensual Brazilian man” and “black mammy” to “women’s goals revolving around attracting men and babies”. ALSO the incredibly cheesy resolution and ending. I can’t say what it is without spoiling it, but its just so cheesy.

This story can work well if it had like a huge modern update. Maybe Mr. Carver got better in this as time went on, as this book was written in the 80’s, and he has written more stories, I can’t say for sure.

If you like moderate sci fi and action, this IS the book for you, though the action happens towards the last half of the book, and some tension is dragged out too long.

Dragon’s Egg by Robert L. Forward

The author of this book is a scientist and you can tell. There is a bunch of science lingo that I was only able to decipher having taken two astronomy courses. There is also a lack of casual writing, (which is something I want to explain but I don’t have the book. A lot of the dialogue between humans is just written weirdly). If you know what all of the lingo means, then you have to get through the story. The story tells of a tiny sized groups of lifeforms called Cheela who live on a neutron star, and their development from mere molecules to complex society, alongside humanity, and first (and final) contact.  

We meet lots of different Cheela from many backgrounds, from the one who discovered numbers to a outcasted religious fanatic, these characters written more fleshed out than the humans. We also follow the line of humans who first spot the neutron star to the ones who visit it, and through them we see how time differences and planet differences would realistically affect human to alien communication.

It is explained scientifically how the Cheela are different than humanity is various ways, such as their environment and appearance, such as being the size of a sesame seed and having various eyeballs. Most scifi stories design aliens that just “look cool”, or humanoid, but are not based on a logical reason, or a planet that vastly differs from humanity.  There is even a manual in the back full of info goodies!

HOWEVER, among the issues already pointed out, there is one major dealbreaker here, and that is the amount of human influence that drives the story. I mean this in two ways. One, I find it quite lame that such a different life form would have some male and female gender division. Why this division exists is not really explained and I don’t know I feel like this category wasn’t explored so well. Also, lack of cultural info. Two, the major one, is how the development of Cheela was sped up by humanity. As in, when Cheela and humanity made communication, the Cheela basically was sent all kinds of human information, and went and based their scientific discoveries and culture around what was given. After this section of the book, there is less speculation on Cheela life, which wasn’t super fun. The author also lacked a lot of details in general as to basic things, such as how buildings would look like for paper flat Cheela, or how other lifeforms on the planet looked like.

Overall, I really liked Dragon’s Egg, and stands out to me as the most unique book I have read. If you like heavy scifi, this IS THE BOOK FOR YOU. Not so much for action, to be honest. Drama, yes tho.

AAAAaaand that’s all I have for now! I hope to find some other scifi books to review. 

One book that I really want to read is a book called Solaris, about a living planet that basically messes with human explorer minds in order to try to discover them, and they are so different its a weird experience for all involved. Its an interesting concept, but my library does not have it  and I don’t want to watch the movie :(

If you want to recommend something, I am cool with that!

[wonderfulworldofmichaelford]

Baby Driver review

Edgar Wright can do no wrong. This may seem like a horrible pun, and it is, but after seeing his latest cinematic offering, Baby Driver, I think it’s a pretty safe thing to say. Shaun of the Dead, Hot Fuzz, The World’s End, Scott Pilgrim vs. the World, and now Baby Driver… the man just seems incapable of disappointing with his films. This film was still a risky move for Edgar Wright; the man is known mostly for comedic films, or at least films where comedy is a huge selling point. Scot Pilgrim and Hot Fuzz are both action-comedies, whereas Baby Driver is more of an action crime thriller with comedic elements (hey, Wright’s not just gonna drop his signature style, is he?). It is also a low budget film where Wright insisted all the stunts and driving be done with practical effects rather than CGI, and it was originally going to be tossed in August, which is a dump month for… but after being screened at South By Southwest and receiving critical acclaim up the wazoo, it was pushed on up to June. The riskiness of jumping into another genre paid off, because Baby Driver made up its production budget its opening weekend and is still going strong!

In short, this movie is a massive sleeper hit, and for very good reason: it’s fantastic, stylish, exhilarating, and populated by some of the finest actors playing the most intriguing characters in a crime film since The Usual Suspects or GoodFellas. So what story could produce characters so good? Well, let me tell you! The story centers on a young man known only as “Baby.” Baby is the getaway driver for a criminal kingpin known as Doc, who has a gang of bank robbers he sends out to commit crimes. Baby is a kid with a tragic past, as an accident claimed his mother’s life and gave him tinnitus, which is why he constantly listens to an iPod at all times. One day, he meets a lovely young waitress named Deborah, and the two soon fall in love… and now Baby finally has a reason to leave the criminal world behind after his last job. But things never turn out so easy, do they?

The most important bit to note here is the soundtrack, and how it plays into every scene. Actions in a scene with music down to the smallest detail happen in rhythm to the music… and in scenes where things are going poorly, things start going noticeably off rhythm. Bullets, hand gestures, steps, movements, they all match up to the rhythms of the awesome soundtrack constructed of tons of awesome, old school music. This is a level of soundtrack and film synchronicity the likes of which I’ve rarely seen done so well not just in live-action film, but film in general. Even better: in the times when Baby’s music gets taken away for some reason, we are treated to the same sort of humming, ringing, buzzing sound he hears and drowns out with his tunes (this is usually a sign things are about to go to shit).

And now we have the characters: Ansel Elgort, best known for playing the lead love interest of everyone’s favorite teenage cancer romance story The Fault In Our Stars, here shows off just how badass of an action star he can be. From his awesome driving skills to his impeccable taste in music to his seemingly endless supply of cool shades, Baby is one cool customer and a likable protagonist. Kevin Spacey is here as Doc, and, well, it’s Kevin Spacey. I don’t think I need to tell you that he’s amazing. Jon Hamm and Eiza Gonzalez play Buddy and Darling, a Bonnie & Clyde-esque criminal duo who are almost always all over each other when not committing heists. Darling gets major props for subverting your expectations that she’s just the arm candy of the duo by going in guns blazing a couple of times, and Buddy… well, I’ll be explaining the full extent of why he’s great shortly. The final major character is Bats, played by Jamie Foxx, and again, I will explain the full extent of him in the following paragraph, just know that he, too, is a very well done psychopathic criminal. Even some of the more minor characters are interesting, such as the one-scene wonders Griff (a bank robber played by Jon Bernthal in the awesome opening scene and who relentlessly taunts Baby) and The Butcher (an arms dealer who is such an incredibly large ham he refers to the arms he’s dealing out using meat-related terms and is played inexplicably by famous singer-songwriter Paul Williams. You know, the guy who wrote “Rainbow Connection.”). But now, let’s go into Buddy and Bats in a bit more detail, so that I can explain why these two are perhaps the best characters in the film... but be warned; there’s some SPOILERS ahead.

The movie’s greatest trick is how it constantly subverts your expectations. Bats and Buddy are the greatest examples of this in the film; for all of the film up until the final heist, Bats is built up to be the main antagonistic force. He’s absolutely bloodthirsty and mocks everyone around him, he’s creepy, he’s intense, and he’s also disturbingly hilarious. He’s just an out-and-out bad guy who doesn’t give a fuck how many people he wastes as long as he gets paid, and proudly proclaims how no one who has ever done a job with him lives afterwards. The guy is an absolute psychopath and Jamie Foxx plays him to perfection; you can just tell Foxx is having a blast. Buddy, on the other hand, is portrayed throughout the whole movie as being a pretty affable guy; sure he’s usually seen snogging Darling, but he does try and defend Baby and even Bonds with him over music. Hell, when it seems like Baby is ducking out before the final mission, Buddy straight up tells him it would be better if he just goes if he’s having second thoughts because he doesn’t need that kind of risk. Buddy certainly lives up to his name, which is probably why Bats laughs off Darling’s speech of how crossing Buddy is a bad idea and her claim how “Once he sees red, you only see black” is nothing but a bunch of fabricated movie bullshit.

Bats is absolutely wrong. In fact, Bats dies first out of the final crew after going a bit too far. It is, in fact, Buddy who is the major antagonistic force, going from the affable bank robber to the fucking Terminator after Baby costs him something very important to him. Jon Hamm’s range is on full display here, and he is truly threatening as a villain. The jarring switch from the laid-back and cheerful big brother figure he was earlier to a cold, violent, bloodthirsty killer hellbent on destroying Baby and his happiness is nothing short of incredible. Bats and Buddy are truly great antagonists in their own rights, and fully exemplify how this film plays with your expectations. Hell, even the ending plays with your expectations a bit, but I won’t get into that level of spoilers. SPOILERS END HERE.

So after all this gushing, is there anything bad I can say about the film? Actually, yes! The romance with Deborah is the absolute weakest part of the movie, in no small part because Deborah is flat out not an interesting character. We never really get to know her beyond her being the object of Baby’s affection, and she basically functions as a satellite to baby and a plot device. She’s not badly acted or anything, but she’s not really given much to do and really seems to be there just so Baby has a solid reason to quit. It doesn’t really bring the movie down, but it certainly doesn’t improve it and is the clear weak link of the story.

Even with that, though, Baby Driver is nothing short of incredible. This is a damn good movie, perhaps even Wright’s best. The characters are great, the story is solid, the music is awesome and is woven intricately into every scene… this movie has the potential to be considered a classic down the road. Hell, considering how well it’s doing and the rave reviews from critics and moviegoers alike, it’s well on its way there! I can’t recommend this one enough, do yourself a favor and check this out as soon as you can.

Edgar Wright has apparently had this film in his mind since the middle of the 90s… let that sink in. He spent more than twenty years trying to get this off the ground, and he finally did it! If nothing else, this film should act as inspiration for any struggling director; no matter how long you have to wait for your dream, never give up on it because, who knows? You could be the one to make the next Baby Driver, and who wouldn’t want to do that?

[lostinyourears]

CMLL 84th Anniversary Report!

The show is still available at internet.tv this will obviously be spoiler filled so fair warning. I won’t have the ‘who’s who?’ sections I normally do because the primer I did before the show aired basically has pictures of what everyone looks like.  

Stuka Jr, The Panther & Blue Panther Jr. vs Polvora, Dragon Rojo Jr. & Hechicero

This opening trios match was probably the best trios of the night. I’ve always felt that Stuka Jr. and Valiente fill a very similar role and would normally argue that Valiente fills it better. Stuka Jr’s performance here has really made me rethink that position. Stuka was very impressive as was Hechicero. I think this is arguably one of the best trios matches of the year, which is high praise since about 70-80% of CMLL’s output is trios matches.  

The Panther Bros really earn this opening spot with both this and their opener 2 weeks ago at Gran Prix being the standout undercard match both iPPV’s. I’d really like to see them face Puma/Tiger again soon on a big stage like this.

While I like Panther Bros more than Polvora/Dragon Rojo Jr. Both teams deserve a pat on the back though, with each duo working excellent as a team doing double team maneuvers and each treating their odd man out as an extension of their team instead of just a 3rd person they are dragging along as it sometimes feels. Panther Bros lost the 3rd falls, but don’t feel like losers because they were in the best trios match of the night. 

Marco Corleone, Diamante Azul & Valiente vs NGD(Sanson, Cuatrero & Forastero)

A fun bout that allowed some of the bigger tecnico names of CMLL to shine and use their signature maneuvers. Valiente did his signature double springboard moonsault, we got Air Corleone and Diamante Azul got to show off his powerhouse moveset. NGD weren’t left out in the cold though, as one of CMLL’s rising trios one of the reasons they are rising is because they are great at doing team moves. Which looked good vs two of the heaviest guys on the roster : Azul/Marco. 

NGD lost, which is questionable since they are taking on such a thrown together team. Still Azul just won Gran Prix, unmasked a guy back in March and both Valiente and Marco are holding CMLL gold. So it’s not like they lost to some midcarders. I just think NGD winning their Anniversary Debut would have been nicer, but we don’t live in a perfect world and we still got a good match out of these 6, even if it wasn’t the hot match we got in the open. 

Sam Adonis, Rush and Kraneo vs Barbaro Cavernario, Negro Casas and El Felino

This match seemed to exist mostly to set up a feud for down the line. Adonis and Negro Casas has already been announced for a lightning match for Friday. This match wasn’t everything it could have been, but we got some good bits. Cavernario and Rush clash here and hopefully that is something down the line as well, though who knows how that will come to be since both are rudos, but so are Adonis and Casas... though really everyone becomes a babyface/tecnico when taking on the Trump loving Adonis. 

Kraneo/Cuije are fun as always and even Felino did a big dive. No doubt feeling the need to pull out all the tricks in his book. Every CMLL Anniversary you are in as a 50+ year old talent might be the last. While the match wasn’t great, it did what it was meant to by leading to Adonis/Casa. It might be the worst match on the card, but that’s more because of the dumb finish than any of the in ring action which was solid, if a little rushed.(No pun intended)

Princesa Sugehit vs Zeuxis, Mask vs Mask

Wow! These ladies really set the bar high for the main event. I haven’t seen the MYC yet, I’ve watched the first 2 episodes and will get around to it. So with that said, I have to say that of all the women’s matches I’ve seen this year across WWE/NXT PPV’s and TV(Though I have missed some NXT TV Women’s matches)... this is the best women’s match I’VE seen this year. That’s just that I’ve seen, I don’t know if it’s Asuka’s undefeated streak or me not really buying into Ember Moon. This just stood tall a a great match. Also, I’m certain I might be less hot on this match after seeing the MYC which I only heard good things about.

This just felt more Dramatic and the stakes seemed much higher. While the women weren’t the main event, this is the first ever women’s mask vs mask match at Anniversary. The crowd felt hot for this, arguably as hot as they were all night, though I think the main event also had it’s epic moments the crowd got behind. I absolutely loved the second fall moment when Zeuxis reversed an armbar into a pin to get the fall. 

I also appreciate the pacing of the match. While the main event was great, I would argue fall 1 and 2 happen too quickly making it almost all in the 3rd round. Which is a good tactic for building drama, I just prefer the 1st/2nd rounds not feeling like an afterthought. 

Hopefully this match and the big moment of Sugehit losing her mask wasn’t for nothing. I’d love for this to be a start of a brighter future for Luchadoras and women in CMLL. Hopefully this can occupy the space that the Sexy Star controversy has had in past weeks. With that story quiet, hopefully this doesn’t go under the radar and CMLL has things in mind for Sugehit and Zeuxis and doesn’t let this momentum slow. 

Flip Gordon, Volador Jr. & Caristico vs Ultimo Guerrero, Mephisto & Satoshi Kojima

This match was... what it was : filler. I mean let’s not mince words... it was fun/good filler, but that’s what it was. CMLL Anniversary couldn’t happen without Ultimo/Volador cause Arena Mexico would riot. CMLL likes to have some outside talent on Anniversary so we got Flip and Kojima at the party. 

This match lacks a certain urgency and it’s not hard to understand why. 

All the CMLL talent are made for life and basically on the back 9 of their careers. Volador Jr. is probably the only talent who might have more success in their future than their past, but even Volador Jr is super decorated and won the biggest prize in CMLL this year by beating Ultimo to be crowned the 2017 Universal Championship. 

Really only Flip Gordon would have something to prove and it kinda shows. The 25 year old working probably the hardest out of anyone in the match.

I find it funny that I watched 10 Kojima matches from the G1 Climax and his performance here might be the favorite one I’ve seen from him. Though, I’ll freely admit that I’m not as well versed in his tag runs with Tenzan or his higher on the card singles run from a decade or so ago. 

A good/fun light match, but not one that felt like it needed to be won. Instead it feels like a game of pickup with very little on the line... because that’s what it was for most people in the match. No one on team rudo is going to be hurt by this loss, Ultimo in particular is probably more invested in the next match on the card than he was in this throw away trios that was the buffer between the two mask vs mask main event caliber matches.

Niebla Roja vs Gran Guerrero, mask vs mask 

I think they did it... I think they really fucking did it. There was doubt going into this match. Niebla Roja disappeared for the last couple weeks, with everyone saying he had an injury. If that is true, his performance here is unbelievably good. If that’s not true, he still did a great job for an uninjured guy. 

Right off the bat we got Roja suicide diving out onto Gran Guerrero. 

Something to note is both men had their older brothers in their corners. 

Both of course fighting to keep their mask, both masks being designed to look like Ultimo Guerreros. 

I really have a hard time finding faults in this match. Which shocks me here and with CMLL mask vs masks matches in general. As far as I can tell/know, Gran and Roja have never had a singles match before this. Let me repeat that NEVER have these two met in singles competition before having one of the best singles matches of this year!

One spot I don’t like is the Gran Guerrero inverted powerbomb out of the corner... it just looks a little convoluted imo and not as impactful as an Ultimo Bomb. I get that it’s done as a way to distinguish Gran/Ultimo so they don’t have all the same spots, but it’s not a very good reimagining. 

Gran Guerrero did the signature catch twice and the first one was just amazing! I’m never not going to mark out when some diving guy is caught right out of the air. It’s also a spot that seems easy to fuck up, so seeing it done so perfectly made me very excited to see who Gran catches in the coming years. 

I can’t believe they did such a great job. I don’t know who wouldn’t enjoy this match and while it may be bold to say this... it’s better than last year's main event. While last year Dragon Lee/La Mascara had a good match I think Rush’s involvement kinda cheapened the win, even if he cost both man a fall. 

This year was just 2 warriors(pun kinda intended) battling it out for the iconic mask design of Ultimo Guerrero. While some might say that it was just an Ultimo cover band with Gran Guerrero, I think using some of Ultimo’s spots isn’t as easy as it sounds. Particularly with that catch spot that was done twice in the match. 

I’d also be so bold to say something I don’t think is controversial. This was better than the Wrestlemania main event.  No offense to Taker vs Roman, but it wasn’t exactly a stellar match even if it becomes historically significant as Undertaker's retirement. 

Final Thoughts :

CMLL Anniversary was pretty great this year. We got 2 mask vs masks match instead of one. I’d say both were better than last year's, 2 betting matches. The opening trios was great as well with the other half of the card being fun, but not really feeling like a major step up from the normal trios action you’d see on CMLL TV. Though you likely wouldn’t seen NGD paired with such a strong team. 

If you have 15 bucks to spare, I’d highly recommend this show. If you don’t, I’d highly recommend seeing it elsewhere after the fact either thecubsfan or CMLL officially releasing it. . 

Highlights : 

CMLL 84th Anniversary Highlight(No 3rd/Final falls)

[survivorhephaestus]

EPISODE 08: Underestimate Me, The Fucc

And...... out of the stars, a wild Karter appears! By a whopping 47 points, they beat out their five competitors and earned their way back into the game. Immediately after Karter’s arrival, the two teams were finally merged and got a day to relax and eat food before their first individual immunity challenge. The Ateluhcra Team (thus named because the players could not come to a reasonable consensus and Ari has been waiting to name a team after our lord and savior David Archuleta for FAR TOO LONG) also got to collectively choose three rooms for their new spaceship, and chose to install the Kitchen, the Communications Room, and the Airlock.

The immunity challenge took the form of a flash game (Asteroids), and Patrick won by a wide margin, securing himself safety from the first merge vote. Renee also secured safety for herself in a roundabout way by using the Airlock to isolate herself from the vote - she could not receive votes, but also could not cast one. At Space Council, shenanigans ensued, as a 3 - 3 - 1 tie between Karter and Richie almost sent the team to rocks, but ultimately the revote tilted against Richie, and with a vote of 4 - 1 - 1 he became the first member of the jury.

LOGAN

logan wins again. sorry carson, sorry drew. i made merge and am feeling great!!!!!

KATIE

i dont think drew trusts me anymore but thats ok because everyone else does

KARTER

I AM A PLANT SLAYER AND JESUS, y'all can't feed my ego like this

I can't beLIEVE ARI DIDN'T COUNT MY SUN PICTURE. Like I know I still won but STILL

RICHIE

we merged!!!!! at first glance it's 5 lovelace vs 5 minkowski but idk if the lines are blurred i guess we'll see??? also karter is back and i voted them out without ever speaking to them so i gotta go

JAKEY

hi we MERGED!!!!!!!!!!!! wow finally and kelsey came back into the game cool!!!!!!

so basically im p good w renee, pat, katie, richie, n kinda josh. lydia is with katie/pat so that leaves us w like 2 options for a boot. i think it'll be either drew logan or kelsey bc honestly i dont see my tribe NOT staying united for the first vote it's just not realistic sweety.

drew is trying his best to get my team to vote together to take out one of the ppl on his team (i think his main targets are katie and lydia) so who knows if thats working??? idk if the ppl from my team are buying what he's selling or whatever but tbh he's desperate and gonna say whatever he needs to say at this point since he made it clear he has no allies. does he not realize i was one of the people who voted to send out his closest ally, owen, and make sure he has no options at merge?????? prob not so if all the blame wants to be put on katie/lydia imma let that happen!!!

this game is p lowkey so like i don't want to play v hard to stand out. its strange but i almost feel like underplaying is the smartest move bc everyone who is going to be going hard is going to be targeted immediately so i def can't let anyone see how hard i'm rly working!!! renee was like "josh needs to go" right before the merge bc he was the only one doing the challenge so that was "threatening" and IDK it was very telling since i was the only person helping josh in that challenge, i don't wanna be the next target???

underestimate me, the fucc

LYDIA

LOGAN

the sides right now look like Lydia, Karter, Katie, and me vs. the other team of five with Drew off on the side somewhere. there's some possible cracks... Josh and Pat want to with with me, and Renee apparently wants Josh out, so i guess we'll see how this goes. Richie is probably the most dangerous player on the other side because he's so personable, but i don't think we can get him out anytime soon for that very reason

PATRICK

It's been a minute, hi!

So some stuff has been happening. Josh told me he has an idol, which is both good news and bad. It's good because it's a tool we can use to swing things to our advantage. It's bad because I think the target so far seems to be Richie. Who's apparently a duo with Josh.

The target being Richie came up during a conversation with me and Lydia. We were listing off who was on which team during the swap, and both of us forgot Richie. That concerned me. I think I've been pretty clear about what kind of game I think he's playing, and the fact that he's so under the radar while also being likeable is terrifying. If we can't take him now, I wonder when the next chance we'll have will be.

OTOH, I'm definitely somewhat worried about things reverting to team lines immediately afterward. Better players than me have been suckered in that way before, with promises of big things to come that never materialize. I get a different vibe from this group – I think Lydia and Logan are both upfront about working with me, and ditto the other way around. But for better or worse, I can't just kick my paranoia to the side when it's convenient. I'll just have to listen to my gut and act if something feels off.

Renee taking the airlock... I get why she did it. I can't say I fault her. But when people flip from OG teams – and it will happen – the excuse is easy. A 5-5 vote is much more of a struggle. A 5-4 vote (or worse) makes it much easier to justify self-positioning over team good. But also, playing solely for team good is a sucker's move. Gotta know when it's time to cut bait. I like Jakey. I like Josh. Renee and Richie haven't made strong enough impressions for me to want to keep them. And this isn't Minkowski vs. Lovelace anymore – now I'm a Cook in a world of Archuletas. Time to win this.

LYDIA

JOSH

oh boy jakey’s big mad at me

[cienie-isengardu]

Hector Barbossa, Will Turner & Carina Smyth and PotC in general

Yeah, you guessed right, I finally watched Pirates of the Caribbean: Salazar's Revenge (a.k.a. Dead Men Tell No Tales) and now I feel strong urge to rant about it a bit. Mainly about my favorite pirate Hector Barbossa and relationships between characters in general but also about opportunities I think new movie wasted. Spoilers ahead!

From the original trilogy, Barbossa and Will Turner were my favorite characters. One because of his ruthless yet steadfast nature, the other because of loyalty and willingness to sacrifice for beloved and friends / allies. Jack always was a fun character but from perspective of time, he doesn’t really change much. And Elizabeth I liked in general, but the whole love triangle between her and almost all main cast of male characters was too much for me since I have little to none interest for unrequited romantic drama(s).

Will and Barbossa through the course of story changed in many ways. So before I will rant about them in more analytical way, let me tell you what disappointed me the most in recent movie:

The final scene between Will, Henry, Carina and Elizabeth (well, hello ex-Pirate King it was so nice to see you’re still alive) for the following reasons :

it would be cool to see at least some interaction between Elizabeth and Carina, because this movie really lacked presence of female characters (Carine and Witch/Shansa were like only two that really mattered but they were never seen in the same scene, what a shame, the witchcraft vs science has so potential!) but also Elizabeth was Pirate King that lead alliance of pirate lords to victory over Davy Jones & Beckett’s force and she won Barbossa’s respect, she deserved some attention too. Something more than Sparrow’s few words related to her body / sex.

The whole point of Flying Dutchman was to collect all souls who died at sea and carry them to the afterlife. I can forgive that Will couldn’t show up earlier and aid main team with help against Salazar for whatever reason - though I think it would be much interesting if Will Turner had offered to take the bunch of cursed undead to the other side but was refused because of Salazar’s hate for Sparrow (who once again would fail/suffer due to his own pride). Also, wouldn’t it be fun to see Carina’s face when she learns that Henry’s dad is a actually a captain of Flying Dutchman that just showed from the bottom of ocean in the middle of fight? Priceless.

BUT WHAT REALLY MAKES ME UPSET is no mention of Barbossa. I repeat: Will’s sacred task was to collect souls of people who died at sea, Barbossa drowned to save his daughter. So he should be taken by Flying Dutchman to afterlife. WOULD IT KILL ANYONE IF HENRY ACTUALLY INTRODUCED HIS GIRLFRIEND TO WILL, SO HE COULD SAY SOMETHING ALONG THE LINE THAT HE ALREADY KNOWS WHO CARINA IS BECAUSE BARBOSSA TOLD HIM EVERYTHING DURING THEIR LAST(?) MEETING?? Seriously, I would love to see dead!Hector and Will meeting after so many years.

Also, shouldn’t Will be dead for good after curse was removed? His heart was cut out of the body like 17/18? years ago

One more thing that upset me so badly is lack of recognition - Henry was son of Elizabeth and Will who both played major role in events of previous trilogy. Elizabeth even won Barbossa’s respect in the end while Will was fated to became a new captain of Flying Dutchman and since then it was quite possible that he would meet other characters after their death at sea. Yet, only Sparrow knew about Henry’s parents (and learned about Carina’s connection to Barbossa), while there wasn’t any reason why Barbossa couldn’t be informed about young Turner especially since  a) Henry talked quite openly about saving dad from curse and b) if Henry knew about Sparrow, there wasn’t any reason why he wouldn’t hear about Barbossa and Gibbs, so he could just said his whole name and biological ties (like Will did in the first movie, “My name is Will Turner! My father was Bootstrap Bill Turner. His blood runs in my veins”). That should make anyone think twice about tying up / trying kill a son of captain of fucking Flying Dutchman and (ex-)pirate king.

There is so missed opportunity to acknowledge: former events, fame of Elizabeth and Will, but also a chance to dispute about magic & science and for Henry (and still unknowingly Carina) to hear about his (their) parents, what people they were before.

All things aside, I may never call this movie a true masterpiece yet I enjoyed watching it and frankly Barbossa & Carina plot interested me the most. Maybe because Carine in many ways is similar to Will Turner from the original movie. She doesn’t know her family and her love for father is a bit colored by her own imagination (like that he was a good man while in truth he is one of the most feared pirates). She is very smart but at the same time she is looked down because of her gender - if she was a man, other people would call her a science genius not a witch that should be killed in public execution. So I guess we can agree she hard worked to get so far despite all the hate and rejection by society. Sort of like Will who worked so hard at his swordsmanship and blacksmithing yet all the praise was given to his drunken useless master. And both met their supposedly dead fathers (pirates!) just to lost them so suddenly.

The fact that Barbossa cared so much for Carina’s mother - who could be just a prostitute? - made me thinks that he is one of really few male characters in PotC that had more complex relationship with women in general. Of course, we have the whole “love triangle” involving Elizabeth and Will, Jack and James Norrington (and later Sao Fang??) but then again through the series we saw scenes when Jack was slapped by angry prostitutes or is implied he had one night stand relationships or still chose being pirate over any relationship. Not to mention awful many sexual overtones toward both Elizabeth or Carina.

Will was more respectful towards female characters in general but then again, this is Will we talk.

It seems like Barbossa was in sort of long-term relationship with Margaret Smyth; he was aware about their child (or did he learned that after her death?) and was near the place where Margaret died since he personally gave the baby to an orphanage with note who she was (Carina Smyth) and a book as a sort of farawell gift. We know Barbossa named his daughter after the The Brightest Star in the North - a star that lead to home, so was an important symbol. Ultimate Barbossa chose his own freedom over duties to family, but then again he was already(?) well known pirate so maybe it wasn’t that selfish choice after all. I swear, the moment when he figured out that Carina was his daughter, the way it affected him was amazing moment to watch.

It’s sad that father and daughter didn’t have much time to catch up on. Still, Barbossa - the cruel, ruthless pirate lord - so easily thrown everything away for  barely known daughter. Also, he was one of few male characters in the movie who trusted her knowledge & skills despite her gender nor make a joke at her expense. What frankly reminds me about Elizabeth and the way their relationship changed through the series. In the first movie he could be real jerk towards her (at least two times he said something with sexual?? overtones) but then he didn’t go around talking about her like Sparrow did. The more they worked together, the more Barbossa respected her in the end. I think their duo is similar to Turner & Sparrow team; the same as Will changed while working along Jack, young Swann’s character grew up under Hector’s influences (is it safe to say she became sort of his protege?). Elizabeth at least 2 times in saga was inspirated by Barbossa’s words that she actually used in her monologies to win approval of other pirates:

Barbossa: “[...] the code is more what you'd call "guidelines" than actual rules.”

Elizabeth: “You're pirates. Hang the Code and hang the rules! They're more like guidelines.”

or:

Barbossa: “In another age, at this very spot, the First Brethren Court captured the sea goddess and bound her in her bones. That was a mistake. Oh, we tamed the seas for ourselves, aye. But opened the door to Beckett and his ilk. Better were the days when mastery of seas came not from bargains struck with eldritch creatures, but from the sweat of a mars brow and the strength of his back alone. You all know this to be true.”

Elizabeth: “You're right. Then what shall we die for? You will listen to me. Listen! The Brethren will still be looking here to us, to the Black Pearl, to lead. And what will they see? Frightened bilge rats aboard a derelict ship? No. No, they will see free men and freedom! And what the enemy will see is the flash of our cannons. They will hear the ring of our swords, and they will know what we can do. By the sweat of our brows, and the strength of our backs... ...and the courage of our hearts. Gentlemen... ...hoist the colors.“

Beside Carina and Elizabeth, Barbossa had also deals with “witches”. Tia Dalma brougt him back from dead so in return he helped to free Calypso from her human form. That sounds rather like strictly business than anything else (though I need to rewatch the trilogy) still one may wonder why she chose Barbossa from all of the people?

Now, the newest movie presented Shansa, a witch that Hector saved from noose and in return she helped to destroy all his enemies / rivals on sea. The witch adviced him to stay on land as it was the only place where Salazar can’t attack / kill him. Barbossa refused, because first of all he is a pirate and he will not let undead captain to take away his treasures. For what she replied if those are really worth dying for it? What made me feel like their relationship isn’t so strictly down to just bussiness and maybe they were fond of each other on their own specific way? Like, maybe it’s just me, but Barbossa seems to have better relationship with younger women than with most men, so maybe it’s all unconsciously linked to his lost daughter? The witch could be around the age of Carina, so maybe it somehow helped. I mean, Barbossa was quite protective and fond of the monkey Jack, so maybe the pet and later, the witch filled the void in Hector’s heart as the replacement for the lost family? Yeah, that probably more headcanon than a real matters, but still, Barbossa was really touched (and proud) when it comes to just-met Carina, so maybe it is not that far stretched after all.

As much as the movie was fun to watch, I would love to see more interaction between Carina and Barbossa or dead!Barbossa and the captain of Flying Dutchman (and seriously, Will shouldn’t be cured). That said, the idea of the next generation of Barbossa and Turner became one merry family while Jack can just watch the “happy end” from afar makes me smile everytime when I think about the irony(?).

[placetobenation]

SmackDown on Fox Episode #3 SmackDown Episode # 1,052 Indianapolis, IN – Bakers Life Fieldhouse 10/18/19 The show opens with somewhat of an updated intro video as it now shows the superstars that were drafted to SmackDown.  After the pyro, we go straight into our first match of the night. Match #1 Shinsuke Nakamura © w/ Sami Zayn vs Roman Reigns (WWE Intercontinental Championship)

Nakamura is in control early as he grounds Reigns and delivers a series of driving knee strikes to the head followed by a knee drop. Reigns made a come back by hitting a charging Nakamura with a boot in the corner and then taking him down with a back elbow. Reigns and Nakamura hit each other with strikes until Reigns hits a Samoan Drop that gets him a 2 count. Sami Zayn (who was on commentary) went to the aid of Nakamura and would play a big part in Nakamura regaining control of the match as Zayn pulled Nakamura out of the way of a Drive-By by Reigns and Reigns hit hard on the apron back first and then Nakamura kicks Reigns in the head as we go to commercial. 

We come back from commercial and Nakamura has Reigns in a rest hold as we are shown what happened during commercial which was Nakamura hitting a diving kick off the announce table. Reigns began to fight his way out of the rest hold so Nakamura tries for his back suplex, but Roman elbows out of it and looks to charge at Nakamura in the corner, but Nakamura gets his feet up to stop him and then attempts to dive off the middle rope onto Reigns but eats a right hand for his efforts. Reigns hit a few running clotheslines followed by his corner clotheslines and a running boot to the face. Reigns looked to hit the Superman Punch but Nakamura catches him with a rolling armbar, however, he isn’t able to keep Reigns down long as Reigns powers up (because he is “Big Dog strong” as Michael Cole would tell us) and hit a one-handed sitout powerbomb for another near fall.  Reigns was once again looking for the Superman Punch but Zayn leaves commentary for the second time to serve as a distraction, this distraction would allow Nakamura to get Reigns into position to hit the sliding German suplex. Nakamura thinks he has Reigns wore down enough to go fo the Kinshasa, but he was mistaken as Reigns hits him with the Superman Punch which leads to a very close near fall. Reigns is back on his feet and pumping up the crowd as he gets ready to finish of Nakamura with the Spear when out of nowhere King Corbin hits Reigns from behind with his scepter to cause the disqualification.  Winner: Roman Reigns via DQ    Match Rating: **1/2 After the match Corbin hits the Deep Six on Reigns as Cole tells us the reason that he interfered was that he was still mad at what Reigns’s cousin The Rock did to him on the Fox debut episode of SmackDown. Before any more damage can be done to Reigns, Daniel Bryan runs down to make the save as he throws Corbin out of the ring and then hits a top rope dropkick on Nakamura. Bryan looks to hit Nakamura with the wrecking ball dropkick, but Zayn grabs hit foot and won’t let go and this allows Nakamura to run back in and hit the Kinshasa on Bryan. The three heels walk up the ramp as Reigns and Bryan are laid out in the middle of the ring as the segment ends.  This was a good match to open the show, however, it continues the three-week streak of the first match of the night being really good but not having a clean finish. I will give this match a pass for not having a clean finish since we will see these four superstars later on in the night as it would later be announced that Reigns and Bryan would face Corbin and Nakamura in the main event of the show. They show a graphic of what the SmackDown roster looks like post-draft and while there are complaints to be made with how the draft was executed and how they completely went against their own rules for the draft and perhaps some people were drafted to the wrong show I will say that if you look at both rosters on paper they did a pretty good job of making both rosters pretty even. Unlike some years it doesn’t feel like one show got all the star power and the other got completely shafted as both rosters are loaded with talent. We cut to the back as New Day is singing before Heavy Machinery shows up and slams a picnic table down in front of them, Tucker talks about wanting to build comradery between them as they have to team up tonight in an eight-man tag. Otis walks up with an apron on and is stirring up some pancake mix and says it needs some protein which leads to Tucker pouring a ton of protein powder into the mix before offering it to New Day, but Xavier says they can’t eat this close to a match as it will cause cramps just like if they went swimming. Otis doesn’t care as he turns the bowl up and drinks it with most of it running down his beard. I feel like we have seen a segment like this with Heavy Machinery at least three or four times. You have to know that this segment most likely had Vince McMahon pissing himself laughing in the back and I’m sure his only thought about this segment was “That’s Good Shit!” Back from commercial and, Kayla Braxton tries to interview King Corbin but he just puts his crown on and walks off. Before the next match starts we get a video package showing how Chad was cursed with the name of Shorty Gable.  Match #2: Chad Gable vs Curtis Axel w/ Bo Dallas Axel takes early control by wrenching on the arm, but Gable quickly uses his wrestling skills to get out of it and takes Axel down with an arm drag into a standing armbar. Axel backs Gable into the corner where Bo Dallas provides a quick distraction that allows Axel to stomp away at Gable in the corner. Axel hits his father’s seated flipping neck snap move which gets him a 2 count. Axel continues working over Gable until he fights back and turns an Irish whip to the corner into a sunset flip pin that gets him a 2 count. Gable is sent out to the apron where he takes care of Bo Dallas who tried to interfere once again, Gable slides under the legs of Axel but gets caught momentarily in the setup for the Perfect Plex, Gable counters and takes Axel down with a drop toe hold before locking in the Ankle Lock and Axel taps out immediately. Winner: Chad Gable via Submission  Match Rating: *1/4 After the match, Kayla Braxton interviews Gable and he talks about how he has always thought his height was a hindrance but now he realizes his height is what makes him who he is and you should never be afraid to be who you really are. Gable thanks the people who make fun of him as they are the ones who made him look deep down inside and made him want to embrace who he is. He talks about overcoming insecurities and not running or hiding from them and just accepting who he is. He then says that he wants to make the name Shorty Gable even shorter and declares himself Shorty G.  I still find this whole Chad Gable is short gimmick very juvenile as no grown adult is going to tease someone about their height. This really comes down to the fact that Vince McMahon is a douche who has the mind of a child when it comes to what he determines as being funny and he, unfortunately, pushes those childish antics onto the talent by making them go out and be apart of angles like this. I just don’t get why for the love of God they can’t just have Chad Gable come out and kick ass and wrestle circles around everybody else and just become the new Kurt Angle. As far as the whole Shorty G name goes I fear Gable’s new gimmick could be that of a white rapper as that sounds like the name that was left on the cutting room floor when Jesse of Jesse and Festus became Slam Master J.  We get a Skype interview with Hulk Hogan who talks about the 10 man tag match at Crown Jewel, he names Ali and Gable as members of his team and says that by the end of the night we will know who his new team captain is since Seth Rollins was pulled from the match due to having a match that night with The Fiend. Hogan then talks about getting his hands on Flair as the interview ends. 

Match #3: Heavy Machinery & The New Day w/ Kofi Kingston vs The Revival, Dolph Ziggler, & Robert Roode Ziggler and Tucker start out with Ziggler going for a single leg, but Tucker blocks it and backs into the ropes before Ziggler delivers a cheap shot and then a dropkick, but Tucker comes back with a dropkick of his own. Tucker tags in Otis and they go for a double suplex on Ziggler, but Roode stops that from happening so instead they both get hit with suplexes. Otis tags in Big E and they proceed to do a duel hip swivel before breaking Ziggler in half with the wishbone. The Revival runs in but they both get hit with an overhead belly to belly suplex from Big E and Otis. Woods takes out The Revival with a tope con Hilo before running into a spinebuster and Zig Zag combo on the floor as we go to commercial.  As we come back from commercial we see that Wilder has Woods grounded but Woods quickly fights to his feet and hits a back suplex on Wilder. Wilder makes the tag to Dawson who is able to cut Woods off before he made the tag, Woods comes back with a flurry of strikes and an enziguri. Woods is just about to make the hot tag when Dawson and Roode pull Wood’s partners off the apron. Dawson tags in Wilder and the duo hit the Demolition Decapitator for a 2 count. Wilder makes a tag to Ziggler who sets Woods up for a superplex, but Woods blocks it and fights with Ziggler on the top rope before sending Ziggler down to the mat which allows Woods enough time to get in position to hit a missile dropkick. Both Woods and Ziggler make hot tags which brings Otis into the match where he starts cleaning house Otis does some hip-thrusting before leveling Roode with a head butt and stacks both Roode and Ziggler in the corner looking to squish them both but Ziggle gets a boot up (while this is happening Dawson has made a blind tag) so Otis just plants him with a flapjack instead followed by a t-bone suplex on Roode. 

This has become the Otis highlight reel as he is in full control. Otis hits the Caterpillar elbow drop on Roode and then catches Dawson out of mid-air, Heavy Machinery looks to hit The Compactor but Ziggler grabs the leg of Tucker. Wilder hits a slingshot shoulder block that knocks down Otis which causes Dawson to fall on top of him as Otis was still holding Dawson in his arms and this gets a 2 count. Tucker takes out Wilder and Ziggler at ringside with a double clothesline. Dawson tries for a vertical suplex on Otis, but Otis easily turns it around to one of his own, Otis hold Dawson up in the air long enough for Big E to tag in and then Otis hands Dawson off to Big E who has him over his shoulder and moments later Dawson is hit with the Midnight Hour which is enough to give the babyfaces a win.  Winners: Heavy Machinery & The New Day via Pinfall   Match Rating: **½ This was a fun match to highlight the new SmackDown tag team division and also to hype the tag turmoil match happening at Crown Jewel. It’s pretty clear that Vince McMahon is highly in favor of Otis and probably not for the reasons he should be as he sees him as nothing more than a dumb one dimensional comedy act that is the wrestling equivalent to Chris Farley, whereas I and a lot of others see him as this comedy character but also realize just how damn good he is in the ring and how well he and Tucker work together. If Heavy Machinery were taken a bit more seriously they could be the super over babyface team that WWE would need to replace New Day if they ever decide to break New Day apart which has to happen eventually, I feel the New Day split is coming sooner rather than later as there is absolutely nothing left for New Day to do as a team and it’s time that Big E gets that singles push that he deserves so that he can become a serious contender in the world title picture. 

Kayla Braxton interviews Daniel Bryan who doesn’t care about any of the drama surrounding the main event as all he cares about is having his first match on SmackDown since the move to Fox and declares that he and Reigns will put Corbin and Nakamura in their place.  A commercial is aired letting us know that SmackDown will be airing on FS1 next week due to the World Series. Coming out of commercial we get a video package highlighting Ali. MizTV with Bayley and Sasha Banks It’s now time for the must-see talk show in WWE history MizTV and Miz wasted no time bringing out his guest the new SmackDown Women’s Champion Bayley who is being accompanied by her bestie Sasha Banks. The Miz’s first question is quite simple as he asks Bayley why she did what she did last week and she replies that she doesn’t owe anyone an explanation, this isn’t good enough for Miz so he pushes further saying that she does owe an explanation to all the kids who looked up to her, but this time Bayley stays silent so Miz compares her to Brock Lesnar and asks if Sasha is her Paul Heyman. The Miz starts aggressively questioning Bayley as to why she has made this change and runs down a list of possible reasons which include respect, insecurities, and being in Sasha’s shadow. This strikes a nerve with Sasha who speaks up and says that Bayley doesn’t owe anything to someone who was picked in the fifth round which Miz retorts that it doesn’t matter what round he was picked because when he talks people listen and he doesn’t have to change his appearance or slash some Bayley Buddies to be relevant. 

Bayley has finally had enough and says that slashing the Bayley Buddies had nothing to do about being relevant it had everything to do with the fact that she always did whatever she had to do to give the fans what they wanted and all they did was take and they never gave her anything in return. Bayley said that she wanted to elevate the SmackDown women’s division when she won the title for the first time and that is exactly what she did, but when she lost the title at Hell in a Cell nobody was there for her. She always put herself second in favor of being a role model to the fans but they destroyed her. Bayley talks about nobody being there to congratulate her when she won the title last week, so she has come to the conclusion that the SmackDown women’s division is lazy and lacks passion and that she used to try and fit in and be what the fans wanted her to be but she has now overgrown them. Bayley then gives the fans some inspirational words to live by which are “Life sucks and then you die”  Nikki Cross comes out to interrupt Bayley and is tired of Bayley talking and is ready to fight and promises to give Bayley a big hug after she wins the next match and becomes the number one contender to Bayley’s title. Dana Brooke then comes out and talks about being underutilized and overlooked before saying that the flex appeal is here on Friday Night SmackDown. Lacey Evans then makes her way to the ring as we go to commercial.

I like the new heel Bayley but I’m not sure how I feel about this promo particularly as I can’t figure out how people not coming to comfort or congratulate her gets her to the conclusion that they are lazy and lack passion as someone not coming over to you in times of joy or sorrow has nothing to do with whether they are lazy or lack passion. The promo also felt like it was a bit all over the place as she kept jumping back and forth between on who to blame for her sudden change in attitude as part of the promo she blames the fans while the other she blames the other women in the division. One thing that does interest me about this promo is the fact that she used the “Life sucks and then you die” quote which came from a memorable Vince McMahon promo years ago while at the same time Sasha keeps thanking Vince and sucking up to him on Twitter, I wonder if this Vince thing leads anywhere or if it’s just them trying to get extra heat by attaching themselves to the biggest heel in the business both kayfabe and shoot wise. One thing I would love to see them do that could be a really interesting is to have Bayley’s “biggest fan” Izzy come to SmackDown and confront Bayley so that Bayley has no choice but to come face to face with one of the people who looked up to her and see the effect that her attitude change has had on her fans and maybe this time have Bayley rip the headband off Izzy as Sasha did back in NXT. Match #4: Carmella vs Mandy Rose vs Nikki Cross vs Lacey Evans vs Sonya Deville vs Dana Brooke (SmackDown Women’s Championship #1 Contender 6 Pack Challenge) Lacey Evans immediately rolls out of the ring as Sonya and Mandy take control in the ring with Mandy hitting a nice delayed vertical suplex on Carmella followed by a sliding knee by Sonya. Mandy and Sonya team up on Nikki until she turns the tables and starts fighting both women until she is taken down with a clothesline by Mandy. Mandy and Sonya are in the ring alone but refuse to fight each other and instead go out and start attacking Carmella before sending her into the barricade. Dana hits a handspring elbow on the outside taking out both Mandy and Sonya. Dana turns around and is mowed down by Lacey who finally decides to participate in the match. Lacey rolls Nikki back into the ring and decides this is the right time to dab off some of the sweat and then she throws her little towel thing at Bayley and Sasha who are sitting at ringside watching the match. Lacey turns around and is hit with a wrecking ball dropkick courtesy of the twisted sister Nikki Cross. Carmella dives off the barricade onto the three heels as we go to commercial.  Mandy and Sonya are in full control as we come back from commercial as they are working over Carmella. We get a replay of what happened during the commercial which saw the babyfaces hitting a triple suplex on the three heels. Carmella is able to fight back and gain control over Fire and Desire even hitting them with a double bronco buster, Carmella is quickly rolled up by Nikki for a near fall. Nikki Irish whips Carmella who dives through the ropes and takes out Mandy and Sonya with a tope suicida. Dana throws Carmella into the barricade. Nikki dives off the top and takes out Dana, Mandy, & Sonya only to get sent into the steps by Lacey. Lacey hits a slingshot foot stomp on Dana before having a hurricanrana out of the corner countered by Dana into a sitout powerbomb moments later which gets a 2 count. Dana then hits Lacey with a Swanton bomb and goes to pin her, but Carmella and Mandy break it up. Mandy and Carmella exchange slaps before getting into an all-out catfight Carmella locks in the Code of Silence on Mandy only for it to be broken up by a Sonya with a sliding knee. Dana gets a near fall on Sonya and then we get an exchange of finishers by all the women until Nikki finishes Mandy off with The Purge to become the new #1 contender for the SmackDown Women’s Championship. Winner: Nikki Cross via Pinfall    Match Rating: **3/4 This was a good match that allowed all six women to shine and unlike a lot of times when you would have multi-person matches there really wasn’t a weak link that dragged the match down, all six women’s moves looked good as there were no real botches and they also did a good job of being in the right place at the right time so that the match could move along smoothly. This may have been one of the better multi women matches WWE has had in recent years. Nikki winning was a good move as she is probably the most over female babyface they have and I’m sure here and Bayley can have some great matches, plus you will also have Sasha and Alexa in their respective friend’s corner and anytime Alexa and Sasha are together something good is going to happen as they always feed off their real-life dislike of each other. I know people were joking about Alexa and Nikki being apart of the “blockbuster trade” and while I won’t say it was a blockbuster trade it was definitely needed for SmackDown as without those two, SmackDown would be seriously lacking in female babyfaces, but now we have a baby face to match the star power of Bayley and Sasha in Alexa and then Nikki brings more work rate to SmackDown. I do wonder if Alexa wasn’t sick would they have had her win this match over Nikki? We get a video package of Braun Strowman who is in action in the next match.  Back from commercial and we get a recap of what happened on Raw with Seth Rollins burning down Bray Wyatt’s Firefly Funhouse and we also find out that in addition to the match at Crown Jewel being a falls count anywhere there is also a stipulation that the match “cannot be stopped for any reason”.

We get a replay of what happened on Raw during the contract signing between Braun Strowman and Tyson Fury. Match #5:  Braun Strowman vs Drew Gulak Before the match really gets going Gulak gets on the mic to introduce himself and then tells Braun that if he does his usual Monster schtick that Fury will knock him out, so he took it upon himself to make a 345 slide PowerPoint presentation as to why Braun Strowman can win his match against Fury. Strowman doesn’t care to listen anymore as he grabs Gulak and biels him across the ring and then takes him down with a big boot. Strowman does his run around the ring shoulder block and then hits Gulak with an avalanche in the corner followed by the Powerslam for the quick victory.  Winner: Braun Strowman via Pinfall    Match Rating: ½ * PowerPoint Presentation Rating: ***** This was nothing more than a showcase for Strowman and as funny as Gulak was in this segment do we really need to have guys like him in these rolls when they can easily use a local indy guy for the same role. I really hope jobing to the stars isn’t the reason why they moved the cruiserweights to Raw and SmackDown, especially a guy like Gulak who could be having phenomenal matches with guys like Bryan or Gable.  We get a commercial break as Daniel Bryan makes his way to the ring for the main event. It is announced as Reigns makes his way to the ring that he is the new team captain for Team Hogan at Crown Jewel and also next week both Flair and Hogan will be on the show as well as Brock Lesnar and Cain Velasquez.

Match #6: Daniel Bryan & Roman Reigns vs King Corbin & Shinsuke Nakamura w/ Sami Zayn Reigns started off the match out dominating Corbin with right hands and uppercuts before tagging in Bryan. Bryan hits his running corner dropkicks followed by a bulldog out of the corner. Bryan hits the Yes Kicks to the chest and then goes for the one to the head, but Corbin ducks and runs over to tag in Nakamura. Bryan and Nakamura trade strikes until Bryan takes Nakamura down with a kitchen sink. Bryan is looking to hit a move off the middle rope but Zayn gets on the apron as a distraction which allows Nakamura to kick Bryan off the rope and to the floor as we go to our final commercial. Back from commercial and Corbin hits a Deep Six on Bryan (which the camera pretty much misses as it was on a wide shot) for a 2 count. Corbin argues with the ref before taunting Bryan and tagging in Nakamura. Corbin and Nakamura look for a double backdrop but Bryan flips out of it and then takes out both Corbin and Nakamura. Bryan hits a flying clothesline on Nakamura and just as he is about to make the hot tag Corbin yanks Reigns off the apron and sends him into the steps. Nakamura hits a spinning wheel kick and a running knee on Bryan which only gets a 2 count. Corbin sets the steps up outside looking to inflict damage on Reigns but thinks better of it when the referee warns him not to.

 Bryan takes Corbin out with a wrecking ball dropkick before countering a  rollup into the Yes Lock which gets broken up by Corbin at the last second. Bryan moves out of the way of a charging Corbin and this allows Corbin to slide under the ropes and when he does he is met with a flying Superman Punch from Reigns who used the steps that Corbin set up earlier to jump off of, Reigns then Spears Corbin through the barricade. Bryan connects with all of his Yes Kicks this time on Nakamura only to run into a flying knee by Nakamura. Nakamura goes for the Kinshasa but Bryan avoids it and then hits the flying knee to pick up the win.  Winners: Daniel Bryan & Roman Reigns  Match Rating: **¾  This was a good match to end the show but nothing that will blow you away, I was a bit surprised that the babyfaces dominated the majority of the match. It looks like we are getting a Nakamura vs Bryan feud which will hopefully be as great as we think it could be and not a disappointment like the AJ Styles and Nakamura feud from last year. I really hope this Corbin and Reigns feud ends at Crown Jewel as that is not a feud I’m looking forward to.  Overall this episode of SmackDown was pretty lackluster compared to the last two weeks. My highlights for this episode are the women’s match and how well all six women did in the match as well as the first tease of the Bryan vs Nakamura feud. Hopefully, SmackDown will pick back up next week with Cain Velasquez and Brock Lesnar being on the show, or it could be even worse as Flair and Hogan will be on the show as well.