#there will be guilt later
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I can't cry... I want to cry... I feel so much sorrow...
#Something about having an expression that isn't yours. About feeling trapped. Muted. (How I've felt especially in 2023.#Literally unable to cry despite how utterly sad I felt)#It's also not about guilt. It's about feeling other's grief and being sorrowful for them.#candlebell art#fan art#Sun and Moon#I posted this unrebloggable at first. đ
Sincerely interesting to me how it killed the awareness (not sure what word to use) of it#even tho I said I'd change it later. How it got just 20 notes on it's own. xd
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tee hee (*´âď˝*)âż
#zu art#comic#studio#zudio#backstage#dream!sans#undertale#undertale au#utmv#I wanted to make it part of the plot but it's too kawaii to be true xd#although he does have problems with self-control and aggression in particular#scientists associate outbursts of anger with deep-seated feelings of guilt and narcissism; as well as comparison with a sibling :')#(it'll be shown later ig <3)#sorry for so much of [Dream] content xp We'll switch to [Cross] soon ;)#OH and thank you guys so much for 17 900+!! (*´ęł`*)
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just put a bandaid on it
#OC#mira#ark#gore //#blood //#it's about. the cinematic parallels#something something la pieta#thinking wistfully about how ark died in miras arms and she traded immortality to bring him back to life#and then 6 months later he falls in love with someone else#and of course immortality means nothing if shes going to have to live without him#but imagine u trade everything for someone and you lose them either way#not even mentioning the guilt of knowing. in some ways. that ur the reason hes dead#lol. lmao even.
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Circeâs PowerPoint presentation
#Eoic the musical#Manwhore au#Epic the musical Circe#Epic the musical Odysseus#Epic the musical Zeus#suggestive#Now Iâm thinking about other songs as PowerPoint presentations .#Poseidon with a 600 slide PowerPoint on why ruthlessness is mercy upon ourselves#and 557 are just pictures of newly dead creamates he just killed#Polites has a PowerPoint presentation about greeting the world with open arms that turns into a PowerPoint on the nature of guilt#(guest speakers Anticlea and Eurylochus)#Athena has a PowerPoint presentation entitled âyou dun goofedâ about all the ways in which Odysseus fucked up . This is later used by Zeus#to explain to the other gods why Odysseus shouldnât get home . All of god games is just different PowerPoint presentations in rapid#succession . Tiresias and Hermes explaining whatâs going to happen to Odysseus via PowerPoint presentation (honestly wouldâve saved him a#lot of trouble in Tiresiasâs case I feel) but now Iâm rambling
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In which Ford struggles so badly to relate to other people that he wonders if heâs really human at all. The more isolated he becomes, the harder it is to reconcile with his own humanity.
#my art#gravity falls#Stanford pines#ford pines#bill cipher#comic#eye strain#TIME TO DUMP EVERY ONE OF THE 27483949 THOUGHTS IVE HAD INTO THE TAGS BABY#OK!! SO!!!!#I feel like Ford would wonder why he and Stan (being identical twins) arenât. yk. identical. shouldnât Stan have polydactyly too?#as a kid he would dream about secretly being nonhuman and being whisked away to a fantastical world full of people like him#finally free of new jerseyâ finally somewhere he belongs#a lot of this disconnect from humanity came from utterly failing at social interactions while others (including stan) navigated them easily#the feeling waned after Stan was kicked out and he didn't have that direct comparison but it never left#then out in the wilderness of gravity fallsâ his isolation and immersion in Weirdness dragged it back up to the forefront#he deserves to have a breakdown over questioning his own nature. as a treat <3#color symbolism time bc I have a problem and use it at every available moment!!! blue and yellow get more vivid#the further from humanity the subject is#bill is entirely made w pure rgb blue and yellow (+ approximately 2674835 textures/layers/blending modes. I reached 150+ layers. help)#I like the idea that he would appear to ford like pure math considering hes a geometrical motherfucker and how the rest of the mindscape wa#I tried to mostly use trigonometry and related stuff for the Math Greebling. as well as fractals i love you forever fractals#MORE SYMBOLISM:#the grid-ish diamond pattern in all of the mindscape bgs (and elsewhere) is a penrose diagram of spacetime#which shows other universes on the other sides of black holes#SOMEONE ASK ME ABOUT MY EUCLYDIA HEADCANON LATER. IVE DUMPED ENOUGH DUMB HCS IN THESE TAGS ALREADY#BUT I THINK ITS VERY FUN#anyways. fuckt up guys n their egos influencing how they view humanity. bill tells ford hes as human as they come bc he was so easily foole#ford cant reconcile with his humanity bc of a failure to perform in one area#and then the immense guilt and shame over what hes done <3#I have So many ford characterization thoughts. no man nor god can stop me
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Dick: *Found out what Tim did in Robin #52* "YOU KILLED SHIVA?!"
Tim: "Well, I revived her afterwards, so that doesn't count."
Jason: "Oh is THAT how it fucking works?!"
#batman#dc#tim drake#dick grayson#jason todd#robin#I love how Tim canonically didn't feel any guilt over literally killing Shiva that one time#âI have nothing to atone forâ My brother in Christ you committed murder#Just imagining how his two older brothers would react#Dick *Felt tremendous guilt over killing Joker even after he was resuscitated* Grayson#Jason *Was killed by Joker and revived later* Todd
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one of those nights
#small vent#lately Iâve been questioning things a lot#and this overwhelming feeling of being lonely takes over#and I question myself and my feelings and thoughts on certain things#sometimes i end up thinking im a bad person#the guilt i feel because I donât do ship art gets overwhelming sometimes#and i end up feeling like an asshole because of it#but I genuinely just canât (at least not for the gf fandom)#family and platonic moments are just way too important to me#which might explain a small desire wanting to have that but unable to#maybe itâs the aroaceness in me idk#it just gets really lonely sometimes in your own corner#iâm sorry#I know things like this can be annoying but I needed to vent#some more light-hearted things hopefully soon#delete later
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Hunter, Year 4036
#I just realized that some of the dates aren't coinciding. The current Beatrix is from Season 3 and not Year 4038.#It is likely that Year 4038 was the year she woke up after her slumber cycle and also the same year she met Hunter.#He was definitely much different before her! Not as welcoming or laid-back as he's seen later on in the story.#After becoming Hunterâ he joined rescue teams in Fusionsprunt city in a desperate attempt to fix his mistakes.#He got increasingly depressed over the few months he worked there but managed to solve a few cases and even get his job as a technician.#Aloof and irritable. He was constantly on the edge and paranoid about having his identity discovered.#He would exhaust himself hours on end because of his guiltâ which would result in accumulated stress and bleeding.#After he found Gutoâ he was forced to change his lifestyle and bad habits into healthier ones for him.#You could say the guilt still weighted heavily on his shouldersâ but Hunter certainly started taking care of himself again.#fusionsprunt#fusionsprunt hunter
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This is how it feels working on another comic right now
#this meme is so good for this#GJLKSJLKJGLKAGJ#literally exactly how it feels HAHA like#sorry steve. sorry adam.#I'll be back later I promise....#I PROMISE....#I HAVENT FORGOTTEN YOU...#I've literally only been working on this for like 3 days#there's just so much guilt HAHAHAHAH#and yet. I'm doing it anyways...
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I fucking hate when I see a good art piece but at the bottom of the post they say âdonât like if you wonât reblogâ or âif you donât reblog this Iâll block youâ like dude, this is not helping you, I am now NOT liking OR reblogging your post, itâs petty but itâs really annoying when I see shit like this, like yes, I understand being upset you donât get reblogs, I think every artist would like more reblogs! But holy shit! Donât guilt trip and or be a little asshole about it! Wtf! Itâs not that deep! Chill!
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"hit me. if that's what's gonna make you feel better, hit me. hit me as many times as you need to to get this out of your system- do it right, and do it right now. hit me, dammit."
Monday Night Raw, July 17, 2017 | I Donât Smoke, Mitski | Royal Rumble, 2022 | The Drowning Faith, RF Kuang | Wrestlemania 40 | Soft Sounds From Another Planet, Japanese Breakfast | Monday Night Raw, June 2, 2014
#so many chairshots and beatdowns in shield history but i really love this chairshot that *didn't* happen#for once dean chooses kindness#Seth doesnât understand in 2017. Roman didnât understand in 2022 and he didnât understand on Sunday#but I think Seth might now#this is also so so much about Sethâs relationship with guilt#this moment reframes his later interactions with Roman for me#in 2022 he goaded roman on until the chairshot was inevitable. except it didn't fix anything for either of them.#in 2024 he gives himself up to Roman one last time#but now he's not looking for Roman to give him absolution. heâs found it for himself.#jifs#Seth Rollins#dean Ambrose#Roman reigns#insufferable bird of paradise#birds of a feather#Iâm coping with Sethâs hiatus#// flashing#the dead eyed stare + he actively gets frustrated when dean doesnât hit him + that last gif where heâs confused and surprised#+ hopeful
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forever obsessed w the fact that in bh lore vampires do actually die and stay dead for a short bit and then come back wrong. something that sadly never really gets elaborated on but that i find deeply fascinating bc it is implied that they remember the afterlife! which is such a cool and insane nugget of lore to give ur vampires like hello. also the implication that it scared the shit out of them, or at least out of mitchell..... can we talk about it!
mitchell eating his stupid fucking noodle box as hes waiting w the newly turned vamp to make sure he doesnt wake up alone and scared even though lauren mocks him for it!
mitchell making sure to remind george to NOT look at what's beyond the threshold when they are preparing to say goodbye to annie when her door shows up!
that little moment when annie decides to tell owen the secrets of the dead to drive him insane and george asks what that was all about and mitchell shakes his head so annie goes ahaha lol i was just improvising even though both her and mitchell know better!!!! thats their best friend who they will protect from the horrors of death as long as (in)humanly possible! they love you alive boy âĄ
#me trying to make any post abt a single member of the og trio: ok btw did u notice that all 3 of them loved each other so so much#being human#being human uk#john mitchell#i wish the fact that mitchell remembered Death was used beyond s1 bc it is one of my favourite creative decisions wrt supernatural lore tbh#its not really super prominent and they do keep his fear of death in the later seasons but that specific angle was sooo delicious#especially if u take into account the whole Guilt sitiation george has got going on that hes the only 'alive' member of the household#and as such the only one w a chance to Do Something More w his life and get out of there (he cannot. and hes never getting away from them.)#and how hes torn between wanting A Life bc he still has a chance however flimsy and The House (but it was never going to be human was it?)#and how as much as both annie and mitchell want him to stay bc they belong together (and it is heavily implied that a wolf/vamp/ghost trio#is actually the only truly stable environment for all three categories which is what has kempp and co so freaked out)#they also want him to seize life bc even though they cant he still can and he Should!!! and thats such a great element of tension imo#that sadly gets lost in s4 &5 a bit bc toms relationship to the mortal world is entirely different since he was never a normie so to speak#but yeah. i would make a webweave abt this except i lost all of my fucking episodes Plus my poetry collection when my pc died so#u get this 3 am ramble and if uve read this far u will also get the reminder to fucking make backups of ur stuff!!! do it for me pls!!!#the wise one learns from his mistakes but the genius learns from others mistakes or wtv ...... please learn from my mistakes lol#cavetext
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continuing this
#twilight#alice cullen#bellice#bella swan#twilight saga#my art#art#drawing#sketch#work in progress#something about guilt and mirroring your guilt#symbolism or something i am writing an essay about this in the tags#might add onto the post later tho
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Things don`t last Forever
If he only knew that back then
#ben 10 fanart#kevin levin#ben 10 uaf#ben 10#ben 10 series#kwarrel#sketch#may lineart later#the way kevin is suffering from survivor`s guilt despite doing what he was asked to do#no wonder he struggles with authority figures#having ptsd from the whole thing#really makes me wonder how things would have turned out if they managed to escape together
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i also think it's fair to say that charles was projecting onto erik a tiny bit during that fight on the jet to paris. when he says that erik took raven from him. when you're watching first class it's sort of very clear to see that charles did his share in pushing raven away throughout the film. especially when she's portrayed to be in this space between acceptance and rejection of her mutation. after erik enters her life around the same time she finds more mutants to bond with, she gets positive reinforcement surrounding her blue skin. when before, she asks charles and he sidesteps the question, and hank outwardly rejects her. she was definitely a kid at the beginning of the film before transitioning into someone who decided she deserved more than to be hated for who she was at the end. and in that process left the person who had raised her but also never seemed to see things the way she did; see her the way raven saw herself. becoming mystique and shedding the name raven was a way to divorce herself from charles' influence but! erik still played his fair part in bringing her over to his side. both charles and erik pushed her away from home and both charles and erik needed to work together to bring her back to her family
#x men#x men days of future past#x men first class#x men movies#charles xavier#erik lehnsherr#raven darkholme#mystique#magneto#professor x#cherik#i think raven is a very important person tbh#i dont like how they did her in dark phoenix and not as much in apocalypse either#but the throwaway-ish line in dofp where charles implies it was erik who stole her#definitely felt like he was trying to ignore his guilt in pushing her away as well#she is such like. a good example of something this franchise was built on. ability to hide herself away but slowly coming to the conclusion#that she shouldnt need to constantly be playing a character when no one else is#i have more thoughts but i cant figure out how to organize them in my head#so ill come back to this later
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merlin who stands against the wall while uther reprimands arthur, who stands behind arthur at dinners where utherâs disapproval and disappointment is apparent, who has been there when arthur is quiet and despondent after private meetings with his father, who has watched for years the sting of utherâs words and sometimes hands against his own son, who has bit his tongue and followed arthur with gentle hands and softer words as he puts the pieces back together of the man he knows and loves.
merlin watching uther lose his temper over arthur going against him for their people and watching arthur crawl into himself and shove his feelings down to be the emotionless prince his father expects of him. once utherâs rage has quelled somewhat, he dismisses arthur without another look and arthur leaves, his back ramrod straight and his chin held high despite the glazed look in his eyes, his last shot at keeping his composure. and merlin breaks, he glares at uther and waits until the doors shut to speak, in case arthur was close enough to hear.
merlin rants and raves at uther, calls him out on his bs, and tells him to be there for his son. ofc uther isnât having any of it and yells back at merlin but merlin isnât deterred and keeps going on and on about how much of a disappointment uther is as a father and how much better arthur deserves. uther steps in close and raises his hand as if to backhand merlin but he doesnât. the two stare at each other, heated glare meeting heated glare, and finally uther mutters that he should have merlin flogged for speaking like that to him. merlin doesnât waver as he welcomes uther too but he couldnât just stand by and watch uther tear arthur apart anymore.
uther slowly lowers his hand and turns his back on merlin but he hasnât given in to merlinâs argument so he switches tactics. he asks how uther expects arthur to be the sure, determined, and just king he is meant to be if uther wonât let him grow into his power and autonomy, let him learn his lessons and apply them as king. uther finally lowers his shoulders at merlinâs argument which just irks him more as uther clearly cares more for arthur as a future king rather than a son but he doesnât point that out.
uther turns to stare at merlin and asks if he really just disrespected the king so horribly just for arthur, merlin nods once without hesitation and echoes âfor arthurâ. utherâs lips twitch despite himself and he nods and says how he is glad arthur has someone like merlin looking out for him. merlin tests his luck once more and responds that arthur could have more than just him, he could have a dad, not just a father.
merlin watches as arthur reports back to his father the next week about an expedition they had gone on to protect one of camelotâs outlying villages from raiders and uther grins wide and pulls arthur into an awkward side hug thatâs more a complicated pat on his shoulder but at least itâs something. uther says openly how heâs proud and that camelot should feel lucky to have a prince who is looking out for her.
arthur is stunned and manages a slight bow to his father as he leaves (merlin and uther exchanging a glance and nod as he passes). merlin watches arthur as the room empties and a wide, proud smile stretches across his face. merlin feels warm and fuzzy at the sight and chuckles as arthur spins and pulls merlin into a similar side hug while laughing loudly. the two of them have the most fun that day, spending the rest of the daylight goofing off and running around with no particular goal in mind other than enjoying the day. itâs the happiest merlin has seen arthur be for such a long period of time.
#obviously uther is a pos and doesnt remain like this for long before falling back into his anger and rage and belittling arthur again#merlin is disappointed but not surprised#he gives up on uther and decides to just be arthurâs support#OR#uther tests it out and makes a deal with merlin that heâll be more supportive of arthurâs independence#but if he steps too far out of line or grows too arrogant as to stand against him or makes a big mess of things#it will be merlin who suffers the punishment rather than arthur#this results in merlin getting dragged down to the dungeons and getting whipped#uther wanted it to be a public flogging but knew how much merlin meant to him so he decided to do it in private so arthur wouldnt blow up#merlin hides his wounds and uther returns to his shitty ways and takes the bit of confidence arthur acquired#years later established merthur and arthur is tracing merlins scars in bed and asks about the whip marks on his back#merlin hesistates bc he doesnt want to tell arthur the truth and tries to lie but arthur calls him out on it#âwe said no more liesâ and merlin folds and tells him#arthur (guilt ridden) and merlin (protector of pretty prat partner) have sad sex đ���đđ#bbc merlin#merlin emrys#arthur pendragon#fanfiction#fanfic#fic#merthur#uther pendragon#cw parental abuse
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