#Guilt tripping is cringe
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peteytheparrot · 7 days ago
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I fucking hate when I see a good art piece but at the bottom of the post they say ‘don’t like if you won’t reblog’ or ‘if you don’t reblog this I’ll block you’ like dude, this is not helping you, I am now NOT liking OR reblogging your post, it’s petty but it’s really annoying when I see shit like this, like yes, I understand being upset you don’t get reblogs, I think every artist would like more reblogs! But holy shit! Don’t guilt trip and or be a little asshole about it! Wtf! It’s not that deep! Chill!
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centi-pedve · 20 days ago
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where's that one post thats like "im sorry for carving out a small space to feel joy"
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frostise · 7 months ago
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louise is used to being called killer f.rost so much that she finds it confronting if someone special to her uses her real name. it depends on the context of the scene, the person in question and how they're saying her name.
with authority figures; she shrugs it off since it doesn't hold any meaning. they're just stating her name or trying to intimidate her. but her family? it's painful because it brings back memories of who she used to be before embracing her calling to be a killer—one louise felt the need to hide her sadism since childhood. her family acknowledges the fact she was someone before her moniker, but it was the version of louise they wanted to see, not the real one. her mother in particular denied her nature for over a decade until her own daughter prioritised her vengeance over the safety of her family. despite that betrayal, her mother will always refer her by 'louise' instead of what the public calls her. the rest of her family however (like her father and sister) say killer or monster with so much venom and disgust. it's a obvious rejection and she came to accept what a monstrosity she is. there's no guilt or shame in what she did. louise mostly feared being discovered until crystal had died.
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flounderish-lore-rambling · 2 years ago
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CRIMSON JUST GOT BANNED
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euniexenoblade · 5 months ago
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there are soooooooo many situations where people come out to their partners as polyamorous, "hey i've realized this about myself" and the other partner freaks out about it and basically guilt trips the poly partner into staying in a monogamous relationship longer, making a somewhat emotionally abusive atmosphere and when the relationship finally ends if the poly person cheated (understandably) it becomes "ugh youre a horrible person, cheaters deserve death" kinda shit and if the poly person didnt cheat it becomes "poly people are so selfish and destroyed my relationship"
obvi this isnt every situation ever, but every time we get the "ugh poly people mistreated me poly people are cringe poly people can also be abusive" thing people on this site do, i always think back to all those poly people who got forced to stay with a monogamous partner they didnt want.
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konigsblog · 4 months ago
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Loser!König is creepily attached to his therapist. :(
It starts off with flirtatious compliments towards your appearance, about how soft your hair looks, how perfect it would look bundled up in König's fist while he's ploughing into your rear from behind, looking deep into your eyes when you turn your head over your shoulder. Oh, and your hands are so incredibly soft. He can't stop fantasising about the texture of your skin, how it would feel wrapped tightly around his meaty, hard, and leaking cock. And those lips too... So well moisturised. They'd look better wrapped around his veiny shaft though, don't you think?
Then it's gifts for your hard work. It goes from birthday gifts and Christmas presents, to whenever he sees you, which is multiple times a week. He's creepy obsessed and it's overwhelming and horrifying to see him grow more and more desperate for you, despite your attempts to prevent this. You make sure he knows that you're not expecting anything from him, that you're just here to listen, to hear him out. That's all. No gifts are needed, but König insists.
After that, it's stalking you when you're off work and him attempting to become a part of your day-to-day life, to nuzzle his way inside. He'll text you about inappropriate things, about how ridiculously horny he is, sometimes even sending a couple unsolicited dick pictures along with it, making sure you can hear him moaning your name out between deep, sharp breaths. You cringe and remind König that this is inappropriate. That this can't go any further.
But, König is a mastermind at guilt tripping, and you fall for it too easily. You know this, from König rants and breakdowns in your office. He'll prod and push his leaking, creamy tip against your cheek and soft lips while gazing down at you, an attempt to convince you that one blowjob would distract him from the loneliness he's been feeling. Or maybe, spreading your pretty folds so he can push his sticky cockhead into your tight hole while apologising profusely and ranting to you.
He just wants to try out a different coping mechanism, that wouldn't hurt, would it?
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darkbluekies · 11 months ago
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The OCs search history <3
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Silas:
"How to take care of ptsd in partner"
"How to make someone stop crying"
"How to make your partner forgive you"
"Best restaurant"
"Dark web"
"Diamond ring/neckace/earrings/bracelet"
"Best steak"
"How to stop people from gawking at my partner"
"Protein powder"
"Best soap to wash away blood from skin"
"Best detergent to wash away blood from clothes"
"Best cleaning supplies to wash away blood from walls"
"Best spray to keep blood smell away"
"Five star restaurant booking"
"Why are my clothes thrown out the window?"
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Dr Kry:
"Morphine"
"Book series without explicit scenes"
"Healthy recipes"
"How to frame someone for murder"
"Am I secretely perverted"
"Forged signatures without watermark"
"Protein shakes"
"What happens if you mix poision with alcohol"
"Puzzles"
"PG-13 rated movies without angst or horror"
"Plushies"
"Needles"
"How to become an author?"
"How to know if your strict childhood has had any impact on your mental health"
"How to get over your phobia for germs?"
"Strong caffeine drinks"
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King Edmund (let's pretend he has internet for a hot minute):
"Is it really dictatorship if I let people complain"
"Ptsd test"
"Why doesn't my wife talk to me?"
"Nightmare analysis"
"How to cheer up an angry wife"
"Can a queen rule over a king?"
"How much alcohol can you drink before you get knocked out?"
"Beatiful dresses for a queen"
"Jewelry for a queen"
"Are public executions a good fear tactic?"
"How do women's anatomy work?"
"Can you punish theft by death?"
"Can you cook rats?"
"Why are little kids scared of me?"
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Jerry:
"Is drinkable bleach a thing????"
"What to do if your s/o is a fucking loser"
"Is saying 'you're an idiot' synonyms for 'i love you'?"
"Guns"
"Knives"
"Sexy outfits that doesn't make me look like a fucking clown"
"How to ask someone out on a date without sounding like a loser"
"Impressive date ideas"
"Alcohol that will make me forget today, yesterday, tomorrow and a week forward"
"Spare parts to motorcycle"
"Why am I so fucking cool?????"
"Why am I so fucking miserable?????"
"How to hug your s/o without it being cringe"
"How to make your motorcycle go much faster?"
"Boxing gloves"
"40 boxes of *your favorite snack*"
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Hedwig:
"Aestethic wedding ideas"
"Is baby trapping illegal?"
"Is nepotism really that bad?"
"How to guilt trip someone"
"Utterly obsessed with my partner"
"How to be a good kisser"
"Dark web"
"Buy hitmen"
"How to bankruptcy someone"
"How to impress your partners parents"
"Best flowers for dates"
"Best hotel resorts for couples"
"Can you become a super model without school grades"
"Love poems"
"Poison"
"*your adress*"
"Best perfumes to seduce someone"
"*your instagram*"
"*your name*"
"How do I know if I'm blocked on social media"
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sanzuscumwhore · 1 year ago
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Ft. Baji keisuke
Warning: cousin incest, manipulation, guilt tripping, clit sucking, marking, no protection, PiV sex, baji being a bitch, bimbo reader, (one sided?), praising.
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You flashed your auntie an adorable smile when she complimented you about your pink dress. "Tha-thank you Mrs.baji" "aii look at you, you've grown up so much!" Grown up? You looked like a big girl now, you giggled at the thought. Big girl.. yay!
"I hope it wasn't a trouble coming." Mrs.baji said with a hesitant expression "not at all!" Your mom chimed in "we wouldn't miss your house warming party for the world!" You mom continued. Mrs baji chuckled, "oh! Y/n dear, won't you go see kei?" Your smile dropped at the thought of him. You nodded your head no, "I'm sure he's busy- I wouldn't want to trouble him" your voice slowly growing faint. "Don't be silly! You two love playing with each other- remember the times where you'd be in his room all day playing, and wouldn't even want to go home" yea, right- 'playing'. You let out a nervous chuckle but thankfully both the older women were pulled by other guests. You sighed out of relief. 'Need water' you went to their kitchen to get a cup of water cause all of a sudden your throat went dry.
You took out a cup from the cupboard and filled it. "What do we have here~" your blood went cold at his voice, you turned around but got startled at how close he was. "He-hey i-itoko-san" you gulped, he flashed you his infamous grin which showed his sharp fangs. "Well hello there baby cousin~" His breath fanning over your ears. He was always so, so much taller than you. And his muscular frame, his huge hands, his long hair dropping over his broad shoulders, his bruised knuckles it made you so wet. He licked his lips "why didn't you come over to me hmm? Do you not like me anymore?" He said with a hurt expression. But in his mind he knew it was all a facade. You gasped, "no! Kei you know I'd never be like that... its just that-" "it's what huh?" He said a little louder, which scared you. You remember his reputation when he was a teen, buring cars, stripping people and beating them up. "No-no I just thought-" "hmp your not my favourite cousin anymore!" He mentally cringed at himself when he said that, you'd always be his favourite, forever no matter what. "Wha-what?" He smirked. Gotcha. Now he just had to play a little mean, but he knows his mean demeanor gets you so wet. "I'm going to c/n, she's more nicer than you" your breath hitched. You never liked c/n, she was always so mean and said nasty things to you. He rolled his eyes and walked away, you grabbed his muscular forearm "don-don't say that! I'm sorry" you mumbled your apology though he heard it. His grin reached both his ears. "Ok then.. prove it" He leaned in towards you at the perfect point to see you cleavage. The pink dress was so skimpy, didn't you realise it? He'd been starting at you all night. Hoping you'd come over to your 'kei' and greet him cutely like always. "How?" You asked looking up at him with your glossy eyes. Fuck he could feel his cock hardening in his pants, you were always go eager to please him, he found it so damn cute. "Let's play" you gulped. "Do-do we have to?" Huh? What was wrong with you today? You were always os eager to play with him, to let him use you. "So you don't like me huh!" Your eyes widen "NO! i-ill play" you blushed when he smiled.
Baji took you to his room, it was so much bigger than his previous one. He took your hands which made you a blushing mess, you were so ashamed of yourself on how you blushed and got wet with your older cousin. "Ok since you look so cute today ill let you choose, doctor or fire fighter " you bit your lower lips, you looked cute? He was always so good with his words. "Doc- Doctor" you saw Baji smile "Alright then, let's play~"
"Is everything ok doc?" You said nervously "hmmm" Baji continue inspecting you pussy. It was so hard- for him to not make out with your cute clit, to just shove his fat cock in and make you cum all over his cock, like he used to. Back then too you were so eager to make him happy, oh how you let him use you to his disposal. You remember eveytime you came over he'd take you to his room and use you, after wards he'd cuddle you and that's why you never left his room. You liked how he held you. You even let his friends use you! Mikey made you cum so hard with his cock in your asshole, and chifuyu made you feel so good when you sat on his face. All because Baji told you to do so.
"Ok so ms.l/n does it hurt over here?" Smug bastard asked you with his fingers rubbing tight circles on your clit. "Ngh~ ye-yesss~ doc" you bit your lower lips to contain your moans from spilling out. "As I thought, don't worry I have a cure" Baji grinned looking at your blissful expression. "Pleaseee doc~ make me feel better.. it hurts" Baji nodded. "Don't worry I'll make you feel so, so much better"
"Ahh~ ooh~ doooc~ feels good~" Baji continously sucked your swollen clit, with his nose resting on your mound. He let go of your clit with a pop "you ready pretty~" he asked. You blushed when he called you pretty. You nodded, Baji stood between your legs as he undressed himself. His tanned abs, his muscular pecs, his strong biceps, his even more muscular thighs, he was so dreamy, you loved your cousin soo much. "Alrighty then! Your turn" His voice encouraged. Your panties were already under his pillow, so you took off your pink dress revealing your cutesy pink bra which had a bow in the middle. He roughly grabbed your bra tearing it off. You gasped "be-be a little gentle kei-" he just rolled his eyes at you. He grabbed your ankles, pulling you towards him. "Y/n~ your so cute, your like my cute little pet~" he pinched your perked nipples. "Ngg~ you think I'm cute?" You asked with your voice shivering "the cutest~ not only cute but really pretty tooy/n-chan" you turned red with his words covering your face with your hands. "Now, now why you gettin' so shy on me, you love playing with me remember" you nodded when he took your hands off your face pinning it above your head with his one hand. "So why so cold to me? You don't hate me do yaa?" He paused before he put on a feverish face "wait? Did you tell auntie about what we play?!" He asked looking a little concerned. "No... you told me not to say anyone" he breathed in relief. "G-good, don't tell anyone okay? Otherwise we won't get to play anymore and we won't get to see each other, you don't want that... do you?" Your eyes widen, not being able to see kei? You'd probably die. You shook your head frantically. He smiled "See, your so nice to me, your such good girl" you bit your lower lips when he said that. "Now.. let's play ok~"
"Fuck you feel so fucking tight princess~ so good fo'me" he grunted. You couldn't focus anymore, his thumb playing with your clit. His fat cock piercing you with no mercy. He let your hands wrap around his neck and his other hand wrapped tightly around your waist. He bit your neck and sucked dark red hickies. He pulled one of nipples with his teeth "such pretty nipples baby". Your make up that your mom did for you was running down your face. Your mascara running down your face, your lip gloss smeared every where even on bajis lips. "Ahh~ kei~ i- I love yoooou~" you moaned with your head thrown back, clinging on him. Baji grinned before letting out a grunt "i-i know baby- fuck- your gonna cum aren't ya? Can feel you clenching- ooh Fuck~" he pulled your hair and kissed your roughly, shoving his tongue down your throat. He looked down at where the two of you were connected and he almost came right then and there seeing the white ring forming around his cock. Your clung onto him more arching your back. "Hmmpf- feels so good kei~" you boosted his ego. He smirked holding you tightly, his pelvis snapping on yours. His thrusts started getting sloppy and before you knew it, you were shaking as you came all over his cock. He thrusted few more times and pulled out as he released his seeds on you tummy. He rolled off towards your side as you were panting "fuck, that was amazing" you nodded. He got up from his bed and gave you one of his shirts that was so dam big on you. Without showering or washing up, he came back to bed and pulled your small frame towards him. You hugged his large torso while he hugged you tight in his arms. "Hey tomorrow ken and mitsuya are coming over, you remember them right, well let them play with you ok." You happily nodded your head, anything to make your favourite cousin happy. He smiled "good girl, your still my small baby ok" it was clearly a statement and not a question. "Am not a big girl?" You asked looking up at him with your doe eyes. He let out a deep chuckled "nah, your my small little baby cousin" he kissed the top of your head. You hid your face in his bare chest in embarrassment. "But don't tell your mom ok, or you won't be favourite cousin anymore" you agreed, after all he is your favourite cousin, kei.
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jiveyuncle · 4 months ago
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Keith cringes at the hiss of the bedroom door sliding open and the unforgiving hall light racing in to fill the darkness. Still, Lance doesn't stir from where he lays sprawled out across the mattress, hair mussed in the pillow and foot hanging off the edge. Keith feels a twinge of guilt at encroaching on his space as he slides his jacket off to hang on the coat rack next to Lance's.
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It's not that Keith isn't welcome here - he knows he is. This little back and forth pattern of theirs has been going on long enough that these motions should be as easy as sliding into his own bed, but it's not. Instead, it makes his heart ache just that little bit more, makes the pit of his stomach open up to swallow his insides and leave him feeling empty even as Lance pushes into his space each time to fill it. Because the problem is Lance is comfortable with Keith. He's comfortable with Keith because he is comfortable with everyone. It's who Lance is. Inviting. Open. Caring. He gives himself freely. And after the first few times of bumping into each other wandering the ship in the middle of the night in hopes of exhausting themselves into sleep, then actually falling asleep on the common room couch next to each other only to wake up with achy necks, Lance started boldly dragging Keith to bed and holding him in place to prevent him from wandering until morning.
“There's no way I'm letting you in bed with your shoes on.” Lance mumbles. A precautionary hand appears from under the sheets and flops down over the blanket to ward off any attempts to climb under them.
Keith lets out a huff of air that's just light enough to be considered a laugh. “I was going to kick them off.”
“No, no. We're civilized. Put them away.” The hand guarding the covers lifts and shoos him towards the wardrobe before dropping lazily.
“I wake up before you. You won't even see them.” Keith argues even as he crosses the room to oblige. The cabinet to the wardrobe cries out in protest as he opens it, and Keith winces, yet again, at any sound that disturbs the peaceful quiet. He makes a mental note to bug Hunk for some oil to grease the noisy hinges. If he's going to start putting his shoes in here, it's going to need to be quieter.
“I tripped over them when I got up to piss last time.”
Keith smiles to himself as he slinks back over, Lance already peeling the sheets back to invite him in. Keith slides down into the space to lie on his back and has to fight the urge to swallow hard when Lance's arm lowers down with the covers over his chest and never draws back away. “You're awake?” he says instead.
Lance hums quietly. “Brain won't shut off. The usual stuff. I was actually thinking about heading your way before you showed up.” Lance peeks an eye open, squinting through the exhaustion in the dim light. “You came in day clothes.”
“Walked a couple laps around the ship first. Didn’t know I was coming over.”
Lance lifts his chin in the hint of a nod before letting his eye fall back shut. “Glad I waited, then.” His fingers tug lightly near the collar of Keith's shirt, fiddling with the fabric in the mindless way he does with anything he can get his hands on - sometimes it's a leaf plucked from foliage as they trek through forested pathways, sometimes it's a pen spinning endlessly between his fingers during long diplomatic negotiations, sometimes it's a spoon that never settles back on his plate even an hour after he's taken his last bite and the conversation is flowing, and other times it's Keith’s shirt or hair or fingers at 3am when neither of them can sleep and whatever tension that is sustained in the daylight slips away.
And, as always, it sends a mixture of unwanted hope and desire through Keith's veins that quickly burns away to leave guilt in its destructive wake.
This habit. This closeness.
It means something different to each of them, and it's getting harder and harder for Keith's heart to remember that.
Keith reaches up to still the moving fingers on his chest, but Lance's unquestioning thumb seamlessly, innocently, agonizingly slips up along the side of his hand to trace over his knuckles instead.
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Keith controls his next exhale and tries to ignore the gentle movement, but his mind can’t help supplying a word with each tender pass of a thumb: maybe.
Maybe.
Maybe there’s a chance. Maybe these things don't mean something quite so different to Lance. Maybe, if Keith offers a hand, then warm fingers will be there to take it.
Maybe.
He doesn't move again until Lance's breaths deepen and the soft brushes eventually slow to a stop.
When Keith rises in the morning, he bypasses the squeaky wardrobe, tugs on his jacket, and slides out into the hallway with only his socks to fight off the chill of the castleship floors from seeping into his feet. The warmth of a decision burns in his ribs as Keith settles into his lion 20 minutes later to start the early journey out to pick up a member of the Blade. Red senses the change, and a growl of approval rumbles through their bond, deep and affectionate and proud.
Keith’s mouth twitches up at the corner. He sends back his appreciation.
Dead Keith/Red Paladin Lance AU (Part 4/?)
Too bad he came to that decision a little late. Now, he’s kinda stuck not wanting to initiate something that he can no longer start.
Excited for y’all to spot where little nods to this snippet pop up in future chapters.
Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4
You can now read this on AO3 as:
Empty Spaces You Left Behind
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l0vergirlwrites · 6 months ago
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how do i know it’s true? ; steve harrington
synopsis: to steve, nothing involving the upside down could surprise him after everything him & the gang have gone through. until you get taken by vecna—the worst thing steve has ever witnessed.
warnings: swearing, mentions of trauma, blood & injuries, anxiety, possibility of dying, possession, general angst & vecna (yes, that creepy dude needs his own warning). but don’t worry, there’s fluff scattered in between.
note: this fic is inspired by the blue nile’s “the downtown lights” (let’s pretend it came out before season 3 plz) & phoebe bridgers’ “garden song”!
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for a moment, everything was fine.
well, your definition of fine was watching your friends climb up a makeshift rope of bed sheets from the upside down gate in eddie’s trailer. you couldn’t help but let out a few laugh sat their reactions when they landed on the mattress eddie had placed beneath the gate as a landing pad.
this was your normal now; casually going in & out of dimensions to solve supernatural puzzles & attempt to save the day all while wondering if you were ever going to finish your algebra homework (you secretly knew you wouldn’t ever find the time).
steve, being the helpful man he’s known to be, was kneeled on the ground with his hands cupped so he could hoist each person up towards safety despite his abdomen aching in pain from bat bites. he truly was your hero.
when it came to be your turn to climb, you couldn’t help but run a hand through his hair.
“chivalry sure isn’t dead, huh?” you ruffled his locks of brown & amber, feeling your heart beat a second faster when he smiled & scrunched his nose cutely at your action.
“definitely not when it comes to you” he winked smoothly, feeling pride in his chest when you grinned wider at him.
“okay, time to hop on up miss”
gripping onto the rope of sheets, you felt a pit in your stomach start to build, but steve tapping the back of your jean covered thigh snapped you out of it.
“i gotcha, don’t worry” he assured with a determined look in his eyes.
like hell he was ever gonna drop you.
so with a nod of your head, you lifted your left foot onto steve’s cupped hands & felt him push you up.
but then everything went black.
at first, you thought your nervous system may of just forced you to shut your eyes in fear of going head first & falling upside down through the gate (you still could not fathom the physics that explained how it worked), but to no avail, all you saw was black.
soon enough, you couldn’t feel the rope.
you couldn’t hear steve or your friends talking.
you couldn’t feel steve.
now, you were starting to panic.
just as you were about to scream, you felt something sharp on your neck. a long nail dragging across your skin too softly to break the skin. the hairs on your arms stood up, goosebumps littered your body, & all you could do was freeze.
“i think you know why you’re here,” a chilling voice whispered into your right ear, making you cringe as you felt the creatures warm breath fan against your skin.
vecna had you trapped. fuck.
“you know, living with the guilt you’ve harboured for so long must be quite exhausting—isn’t it?”
no, no, no, no. this can’t be happening.
“knowing that if you had kept your mouth shut, your anger controlled, that maybe—just maybe, your father would still be alive”
in a flash you were transported back to that haunted day, back to that road trip that your father forced you to go on. you never had a good relationship with him to begin with, so being stuck in a small space for seven hours wasn’t your ideal way to spend a weekend.
it was a few months after your parents finally divorced after years of fighting, screaming, family dinners that were unsuccessful. your father had wanted to bond, to atone whatever trauma he had inflicted upon you as a young child from refusing marriage counselling (or counselling in general) to work on his behaviour.
but as expected, he was too prideful to admit he was ever in the wrong.
which leads you to that moment in the car.
he blamed you for whatever wrong turn he had made a couple miles back, & since you were the one holding the map, it began a screaming match that festered into a tug of war. you tried to get him to let go of your wrists, to let you lead you both out of the barren forest covered dirt roads so you could ge to wherever the hell he wanted to take you to, but he wouldn’t budge.
however, one wrong move changed it all.
it was when you elbowed him the eye accidentally, causing him to yell in agony & involuntarily push his right foot harder on the gas. he wasn’t paying attention to his speed, nor the way the steering wheel was turning.
one minute you were on a dirt road.
the next you were upside down on a rocky ditch that was at least thirty feet from where the dirt road was.
your vision was blurry with blood from a cut on your forehead. your right ankle aching & smushed tight between your car seat & the concaved passenger door.
your father, who hadn’t worn his seatbelt, was partially through the car’s windshield, body covered in glass & blood & you couldn’t tell if he was breathing.
you stayed like that for hours, with the car alarm blaring in your ears until a first ranger showed up as your saving grace.
but your father didn’t survive. & you still believed it was all your fault.
“wouldn’t it be nice if you could let it go? atone for what you did? stop the guilt from eating away at you?” vecna’s voice boomed in your ears.
you were paralyzed in fear, praying this moment would be over.
*~*~*~***~*~~*~*~**~*~*~~*
“you got a good grip, y/n/n?” steve asked after you stilled for a moment, left foot still in the palms of his hands, waiting to be boosting upwards.
you stayed silent. frozen.
steve called out your name again as your grip loosened on the rope & your body began tipping backwards. he quickly reacted, catching your limp body in time before your head smacked the ground.
his heart stopped when he saw your eyes rolling into the back of your head.
“no… no, no, no, no! fuck! please, please not you—not you” steve yelled, his hands cradling your face & occasionally slapping your cheeks gently with hopes you’d snap out of it—hoping vecna would let you out of his grasp so steve could make it better.
“steve? what’s going on down there?” robin yelled, her voice echoing into steve’s ears but his heart was constricting & his chest felt really heavy.
“he’s got her—he’s fucking got her & she’s not waking up!” steve yelled again, tears brimming his eyes in fear because he could lose you right now.
brushing your hair out of your face frantically, steve continued tapping your skin. “sweetheart, you gotta wake up. it’s steve—i’m right here. can you hear me? c’mon—come back to me, baby” he croaked as the minutes went on, drowning out the panicked voices in the gate above him.
“what do i do? what do i do—“
“steve! what’s her favourite song? we need her favourite song!” dustin yelled repeatedly, trying to wake steve up from his own panic mode.
it clicked—how could steve forget.
music.
“holy shit. that’s it. favourite song, favourite song…” steve began to feel hopeful, scouring his mind through a rolodex of memories until he found the one he was looking for.
“the downtown lights by the blue nile! the cassette’s in my glovebox! hurry!” he yelled with a heartbroken plea, his eyes not leaving your face. “c’mon, baby. wake up”.
steve didn’t care that he was crying now, but he wasn’t gonna give up on you. while the others were searching through the glove compartment of steve’s b&w & eddie’s stash of cassette tapes in case, steve just started to sing the song in hopes you’d hear him.
“sometimes i walk away, when all i really wanna do is love & hold you right…”
his voice was cracking with nerves, failing to stay completely steady as his chest hurt & his hands were trembling against your skin.
“there is just one thing i can say. nobody loves you this way,” he held back a sob, his heart clenching at how your eyes continued to roll back. “it’s all right. can’t you see, the downtown lights…”
~*~***~~~**~***~*~~***~**~*~
steve learned your favourite song early on when you started dating, around mid october after starcourt fell, where you invited steve over for a sleep over since your mom went out of town for a weekend.
he knew you hated sleeping in your house alone after the events of the summer, so he didn’t mind keeping you company. you both had sprawled out on your living room couch, coffee table filled with pizza, pop, & your favourite treat (which steve picked up on his way over as a surprise). the movie on the tv had become background noise by the time you both had finished eating, bodies turned to one another underneath the blanket you two shared.
“so, when am i gonna get a room tour, hmm?” steve asked as he brushed some hair away from your forehead, fingers tucking some starnes behind your left ear as you looked at him as if he had hung the moon.
“i’ll show you under one condition, harrington”
“i’m all ears” he said eagerly, scooting closer to you on the couch.
nervously, you raised your left index finger to your lips & tapped them, eyes flickering between steve’s brown ones & his pink lips. he watched you closely, getting an idea of what you wanted (which made his stomach roll with butterflies).
“ahhhh” he dragged with realization, “want me to kiss you? is that it?” he teased, making you feel smaller than you really were under his gaze.
but before you could turn away or back out, steve was cradling your cheek & bringing you closer to him. his breath fanned your skin, noses lightly brushing against the other.
“i really wanna kiss you too” he mumbled with a smile before leaning further to close the gap.
you hummed in delight when your lips pressed to his, fingers fisting the material of his sweatshirt because it felt so good. steve could hear his heartbeat loud in his ears as he continued to kiss you, his thumb brushing softly against your cheek to make you melt under his touch. the longer his lips meshed with yours, the more your body had moved to practically sit on top of his, chests just touching as your arms trailed up to wrap around his shoulders.
“steve” you breathed, pulling away with a pant but still staying close.
“was that too much?” he asked concerned, chest rising up & down as he looked at you with care.
it was you who kissed him next, one that lasted a few seconds before resting your forehead against his. “n-no—it was really nice” you exhaled with a smile, arms tightening around him when you felt his left hand resting on your lower back, rubbing up & down soothingly.
you both hasn’t realized that the movie was over & the channel had switched over to music videos. playing softly in the background was a song you had a deep spot in your heart for. turning towards the tv with a tiny gasp, you smiled harder when you saw that it was the blue nile.
“that’s my favourite song!” you whispered excitedly, turning back to steve when he tapped your cheek.
“what song is it?” he asked, not having too much knowledge about them.
“the downtown lights” you replied sheepishly.
“there is just one thing i can say. nobody loves you this way,” you hummed along to the lyrics with a small smile.
steve watched you, admiring how your face looked with the tv glow casting on your features. he thought you were just the best thing ever.
turning up the volume with the remote in his hand, steve listened intently to the lyrics, right foot tapping against the carpeted floor to the beat. “it’s really pretty—just like you” he said, smiling brightly when you chuckled at him.
“that’s so cliche, but thank you”
“cliche but true. & you’re welcome”
~**~*~~*~***~**~~**~**~
after he let the memory replay in his mind, the cassette tap for the band’s album “hats” landed by steve’s feet with a walkman & a headset.
“finally!” steve yelled more so to himself, brushing away a stray tear on his cheek to grab the items
first he put the headphones over your ears. then he attached the tape to the player & forwarded the tape to the song’s track number. turning the volume up, steve’s hands resumed their spot on your face to hold you, to coax out of whatever horrific trance you were in.
“hey, can you hear me? it’s steve, your steve. you gotta wake up, okay? you gotta come back to me” he begged, his hope growing thin as the seconds went on.
“everyone’s here—dustin, lucas, max, robin, nancy, eddie—we’re here. we want you back. we need you. i promise i won’t do anymore stupid impressions or be an idiot—i’ll be whatever you want me to be” steve continued to ramble, praying that you were listening, that you were coming home to him.
“i-i love you. & i can’t do this without you” he cried to you, not caring if any of his friends heard his love confession in the moment because you were still limp in his arms.
he could vaguely hear the yells of his friends trying to talk to you too, trying to lead you back to reality. but all steve could focus on were how your eyes continued rolling into the back of your head.
it wasn’t until the song was about to restart on a loop where steve felt your arms twitching, your chest raising up & down rapidly. before he could even blink your eyes returned back to normal, lips letting out panicked breaths as you scanned your surroundings, hands about to push steve’s away until you saw him.
“s-steve?” you asked wearily, voice feeling small & fragile after the return to hell you had just experienced. “w-what… i-i don’t understand…” you were at a loss for words, confused & scared.
“it’s me, honey—i’m right here. it’s okay now,” before he could finish, you were hiding in his chest, hands gripping the jean jacket he wore so tightly in fear that this was another trick. that maybe you weren’t safe & vecna still had you.
you sobbed hard, breaths becoming strained with each cry that tore through you. every time you closed your eyes, you were back there again—back in that god forsaken car with bloody vision & your father dead. back where vecna told you your worst fears.
“you’re safe. i’m here now. god, i was so worried—ohmygod” steve rambled assurances, cradling your head close like he was in disbelief too, making sure that you were really back in his arms.
surprisingly, the headset was still secured to your head, downtown lights continuing to play from the foamy speakers into your ears. the song calmed you down a bit, made you feel grounded. but it was steve’s touches, the smell of his cologne, & his soft whispers that called you home—back to reality.
“is this real?” your broken voice asked, needing to make sure it was really him.
so steve pulled your head back to hold your face in his hands. he smoothed the sweat, the baby hairs, the tears, & splotches of dirt off your skin, giving you the kindest look you’ve ever been given. “ yeah, i’m real. i’m not gonna hurt you. i gotcha, yeah? won’t let anything hurt you again, promise” he swore with honour, his own lip trembling when your eyes continued to well up with tears.
“god, i love you” he pressed his forehead to yours, exhaling a shaky breath when one of your hands pressed against his chest to feel his heartbeat.
that was the most intimate thing he’s ever felt.
“i love you too” you mumbled back to him, pulling him in for another bone crushing hug to say all the words you wanted to in the moment. steve got the message loud & clear.
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darkficsyouneveraskedfor · 4 months ago
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Wicked Games 5
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Warnings: non/dubcon, cheating, and other dark elements. My username actually says you never asked for any of this.
My warnings are not exhaustive but be aware this is a dark fic and may include potentially triggering topics. Please use your common sense when consuming content. I am not responsible for your decisions.
Character: Steve Rogers
Summary: you had a one night stand. Or did you?
As usual, I would appreciate any and all feedback. I’m happy to once more go on this adventure with all of you! Thank you in advance for your comments and for reblogging ❤️
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Guilt. You can't deny it any longer. Your stomach is chaos. Everything you eat threatens to come back up or churns like cement. 
Something happened. Something you can't remember but you know what it was. Yet it isn't just that mistake that eats away at you. It's the one keeping you awake. The one draining you of energy and money alike. Your marriage. 
Stupid is an understatement. You didn't think any of this through. It's catching up to you. You didn't just fuck around because you’re angry. No, you're unhappy. 
But you did fuck around. For all you can say about Barrett, he didn't do that. It's over but you just don't know how to end it. He doesn't either. 
Tonight? You say that every day but you find an excuse not to do it. You're tired, you have to make dinner, you'll do it tomorrow when he isn't in a mood. 
That night you delay the inevitable with a trip to the pharmacy. You need something for your stomach. Once you get it under control, you'll be able to think. 
You grab the cheapest anti-nauseant on the shelf and read it over. May cause drowsiness. Well, what doesn't make you tired? 
"Got a bug?" The deep timbre scares you for more than its abruptness. It's familiar. Your vision flickers like a strobe light as you look over. 
It's him. Again. Captain America. What are the odds? 
"Ate something, I think," you murmur. 
He watches you. It's like he's waiting for something. You stare back. 
"Anyway..." you glance around him. "Sorry, if I'm in your way." 
You take a step back to clear the view of the shelf. 
"Nah, this stuff doesn't affect me. Can't remember the last time I had a stomach ache," he scoffs and turns. He grips the edge of a shelf as he faces you. "You never texted back." 
You flinch and flutter your lashes. "Texted?" 
He grins and puts his hand across his chest and drags it down. He laughs, "we had a good night, didn't we?" 
"Huh, I don't know what you're talking about." 
"Really, you don't? 'Cause I can hear your heart racing." 
You blink and look around, "really I don't--" 
"I'm sure that works with your husband. You two did look awfully happy at the grocery store. I could see the disgust crawling all over you," he snickers. 
"Excuse me, I don't know you. So please, go away." 
He clucks and stands straight. He drops his arms and frames his hips, "is that how you talk to your Captain? You're not how I remember you. You were a lot... nicer." 
"Shut up. That didn't happen." 
"Keep telling yourself that," he shrugs. 
"I-- I can't remember..." you whisper. Your voice cracks, "please, I don't remember." 
You look up at him with teary eyes. It was him? Of all people you had a drunken one-night stand with Steve Fucking Rogers. This can't be real. 
"I remember," he steps closer. "I can't forget." 
"No, please, I'm married. Alright? It was a mistake. Just a drunken night." 
"Not for me," he insists. His earnestness makes you shudder. 
"Look, I'm flattered but my life is complicated enough  alright? I'm sorry but I'm sure you can find someone else, Cap. Someone who isn't twenty shades of fucked." 
You shake the box of tablets and cringe. You turn and sweep away. You head to the checkout and go to one of the self-service machines. 
He surprises you as he puts his hand on the plastic divider and looms over you. You focus on scanning the pills and paying. 
"Look, Cap, I'm sorry I didn't reply." You slip your card out of your wallet.
"You ran out. I came back to an empty apartment." He juts a leg out as he leans on the divider. 
"Sure, but I woke up in a stranger's bed, all alone. I was a bit freaked out." 
"I went to get breakfast," he says. 
"Did you not notice the ring on my finger?" The machine blares in rejection of your card. You curse under your breath and try again. 
"You didn't seem to," he retorts. 
You swallow as your card is rejected again. You toss the pills on the little ledge next to the till and huff. "It happened and I'm sorry I didn't say goodbye but I got enough going on." 
He sucks in through his nose and lets it out slowly. You turn away and he snarls, "I can hear the other heartbeat too, you know?" 
You stop short. What the fuck is he talking about? You gather what pride you have left and set your chin high. You march out without looking back. 
Other heartbeat? 
The nausea, the exhaustion, the aversion to the candle in your bathroom. No. It makes sense but it can't be true. 
You can't handle anything else. You just can't. You can't afford a pregnancy test, let alone a baby. 
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pirateprincessblog · 10 months ago
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Blue Paradise
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𝐝𝐞𝐬𝐜𝐫.: the news of park seonghwa, your best friend's brother you haven't seen in years, joining your birthday trip to maldives doesn't excite you the slightest. so far.
𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: park seonghwa x reader
𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭: 19.5k
𝐭𝐚𝐠𝐬: smut, bit of angst, summer love, innocent but curious seonghwa, experienced reader, childhood friends, a little sadist reader, almost a milf, subby seonghwa
𝐬𝐩𝐞𝐜𝐢𝐚𝐥 𝐭𝐚𝐠𝐬: oral (both receiving), public, submissive seonghwa, dominant reader, gagging
𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: swearing, nsfw scenes, mentions of eating disorder, mentions of body dysmorphia
𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞𝐬: use of the word noona! i'm not a koreaboo i promise, and i don't care if you think it's cringe, the word noona has a special grip on me. eternal sunshine prettiest boy seonghwa is the one i'm writing about in this piece <33 my sadistic side is showing a little here. also ???????
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𝐃𝐢𝐬𝐜𝐥𝐚𝐢𝐦𝐞𝐫: 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐢𝐬 𝐚 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐤 𝐨𝐟 𝐟𝐢𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐝𝐨𝐞𝐬 𝐍𝐎𝐓 𝐫𝐞𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐰𝐫𝐢𝐭𝐭𝐞𝐧 𝐦𝐞𝐦𝐛𝐞𝐫 𝐢𝐧 𝐚𝐧𝐲 𝐰𝐚𝐲.
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when you said the words i'm fine out loud, you weren't sure if you were trying to convince the group of girls in front of you, or yourself. you weren't angry. nor sad. you were simply disappointed. the notebook you were subconsciously gripping in your lap contained all the plans and goals that were now impossible to fulfill. just two days before leaving your hometown and visiting the sweet tropical delight, nearly all the people from your friend group decided they wouldn't be going. the trip was paid by you, as a celebration for your birthday.
maybe you chose the wrong location. or the wrong time. or just the wrong people. it didn't matter. you could say goodbye to the printed images of the blue water and the clear sky in the notebook, along with the idea of swimming with sharks or drinking straight out of a coconut. you worked hard to save up for this celebration. hours of working even after your shift was done, drowning in sweat and running home just for a few extra dollar bills. little by little, you saved up for all the tickets. true, your parents did give you money here and there. but you have your little hobbies and dirty pleasures, and oh, you just love desserts and dresses. it's not easy to save up when the marketing teams of your favorite stores work harder than you or your parents. how can you not buy that tight bright pink sequin dress with the feathery sleeve ends? and the heels which come in half price if you buy the matching bag? what a steal.
your eyes scan the room, looking for the slightest sign of guilt on their faces. yet, not a single one was visible. you wished to rip their plane tickets in front of their faces, throw the notebook at the girl who proposed the idea of rather staying home instead of getting drunk in a whole different location far from home. you witnessed their excitement, screaming and yelling when you announced the trip. then, what happened?
"we're sorry, but-"
"you're not sorry. you just want the feeling of guilt to disappear. that is, if you're feeling guilty at all." you interrupt, your tone pure frost.
your best friend cups your hand, making you soften the grip on the notebook. in other circumstances, she is the one who does the talking. but today, she is willingly letting you handle it. you've had enough of everyone using you and reaching out to you only when they need something.
"it's not like we took any money from you. you're acting like we robbed you or something." the girl says, looking at the rest of the group and asking for support.
"not directly, you didn't." your face stays stone cold. "but cancelling this late means i cannot get a refund. or real friends to go with me."
they all scoff in disbelief, some of them already angry and ready to start spitting insults. you don't care. you're ready for everything they have to throw at you.
"real friends? are you fucking with me?"
you feel like you're in a euphoria episode. and yes, it is as fun as it looks. especially when you know damn well you're right, and they're wrong. you watch them yell at you, accusing you of accusing them, making up a thing or two along the way, even getting into your face and pointing into your chest. you watch with a lazy smile, which only enrages them more. each moment that passes, they're only proving you right. they were here just for the money. if you asked them your favorite colour, they'd just look at each other helplessly. but if you asked them how much your parents have given you for christmas, they'd know to the last cent.
"you know what? fuck your parents, your trip, your money and your fake ass."
and just like that, you were left alone with the only true friend in the big house. the appetizers were untouched, and so were the cocktails. you feel a hand wrap around your shoulders.
"we'll figure something out. i won't let anyone ruin your birthday."
you smile, this time sincerely. it takes less than fifteen minutes to lift your spirits. with your friend saying stupid things in a normal tone, it's easy to come out of the shell. you're already opening your notebook again, scribbling over the names that were once involved, and adding up new plans.
"you know, we have to go swimsuit shopping. i'm still bloated from the period, and i don't think it'll pass until the trip. the plane ride will only make it worse."
you agree, already picturing the colour and shape you'd want to wear. but still, what to do with the remaining tickets? the amount of money is too huge to just let it go. you can't ask your parents to come, they're busy with a recent project that is supposed to help their business. you can't think of any other friends, and there's no way in hell you'll bring your sibling. constant bickering is something you wish to leave for home, not bring to the maldives.
"what do i do with the tickets?" you mumble, your head now lying on top of the notebook. you feel helpless. at this point, you want to cancel and never go anywhere again.
"well, you might kill me for this, but i have an idea."
you turn your head to the side, cheek pressing into the notebook. your friend is sprawled over the couch upside down, her feet resting on top of the backrest and her head hanging from the seat. she dramatically chews the chips, purposely dragging it out to tease you.
"come on now, we have a little over twenty four hours from the flight. i'm begging you, give me a solution that will save my money."
the girl finally swallows the chips, then looks up at the ceiling.
"when was the last time you visited my home?"
not sure how that is connected to her idea, you raise an eyebrow in confusion. "i can't remember. your parents usually come over here instead of us coming over. why?"
"well, you do know that i have a brother?"
"that i do." you laugh, remembering the little rascal. even though he was younger, he never hesitated to flip you both off when you bothered him, or kick you in your knees if you even looked at him the wrong way. ever since he enrolled to a high-school in a city nearby, you barely saw him. then, he went to college. he comes over every other weekend, but sometimes not even that. it's been many years since you've last seen him. "little park seonghwa."
"not so little now," she laughs, "i think he's, like, taller than your dad."
"impossible. he was shorter than me last time i saw him."
"yeah, because he was eleven."
you roll your eyes. she's right, but you'd rather eat scrapped toast burns than admit it. you hear the leather of the couch squeaking, then footsteps. she sits next to you on the floor, then pulls the notebook towards herself without warning. your head follows the notebook, almost falling off and hitting the edge of the table. you glare at her, but she just giggles mischievously.
"i thought, we could invite him and his friends."
"invite your little brother with us? to the maldives?"
she nods, not seeing anything wrong with it. your brain is already listing out what things are out of question and impossible.
"first of all, he's like, fifteen."
"he's twenty-four."
"he's basically a kid." you ignore her, sticking to your own idea as if you know her brother better than her.
"you'd be surprised how much of an adult he is now. little turd still gets on my nerves, but he has come a long way. he even hugs me sometimes."
you sigh. in your head, he is still the little eleven year old seonghwa with blue shorts and the green polo shirt. seonghwa with the blue crocs and a dirty ipad. seonghwa who would enter the room without knocking just so he could wipe his boogers on your clothes. gross.
"fine, let's say he comes along. am i supposed to wear a bikini in front of him?"
"that's normal! it's just a bikini. besides, i haven't seen him make a move on a girl since he got roasted by one for his hair at homecoming."
you can't help but feel bad for the poor boy. your brain forms an unwanted image of seonghwa, all dressed up and fixed for his date, only for his date to bring him down in front of everyone.
"i did not need to imagine that." you mumble to yourself, then try to take the pen from your friend. "give me that."
"no, wait! he has like seven friends, so one ticket will still be an extra. still better than all nine going to waste, right?"
"right."
"so,
seonghwa takes mel's ticket,
wooyoung takes lara's ticket,
mingi takes josie's-"
"hold on, hold on. they're all boys?"
"men, yes."
you close your eyes and pinch the bridge of your nose. you try to breathe, but the idea of taking literal kids to such an expensive vacation is driving you crazy.
"i'm going there to get drunk, get a tan and fuck somebody in my pretty pink dress, maybe even get scissored by you, not to babysit your brother and his friends. and what the fuck are those names, are they forming a kpop group?"
the girl laughs, her head falling back against the sofa behind you. all of this is so hilarious to her, while you're feeling like it's a bad dream that'll be gone if you pinch yourself enough.
"first of all, very flattering, i appreciate that. i'll think about the offer. second, you're literally just a couple years older than them. and third, they're more than capable of getting more drunk than you and fuck someone, just like us."
there wasn't any space to think about it. it's either spending the week guarding kids from getting alcohol poisoning or spending the week feeling guilt because of the lost money.
"fine."
"oh? just like that?"
"what other choice do i have? let the kids have fun."
she giggles, then finishes the scribbling on the page. you scan over the names, then the female ones that were crossed out. you feel your heart tighten, but remembering that you got rid of something you didn't need the whole time, you feel at ease.
"i'll tell them to come over tomorrow, just so you can meet them and tell them the plan."
"yeah, that'd be great."
the rest of the day is spent outside, visiting various stores and trying on various swimsuits. all of them were extremely exposing, something you weren't quite used to. still, you managed to gain the confidence and buy a risky set. a baby pink set with panties that had a lower cut than you preferred, along with a shiny waist chain, and a decent bra. the summer heat waves were more than present, causing people to run into stores just to cool off, including the two of you.
after an ice cream, a few burgers and slushies, you finally collapsed on your bed. it wasn't long until your alarm clock had your eyes peeling open. you had slept for almost nine hours, yet it felt like ten minutes.
your friend was supposed to be here around dinner, bringing takeout and the boys with her. you made a deal that the boys could sleep over, so that you can drive to the airport together without having to wait for anyone. you packed all day, proudly stacking your bikinis for each day of the week. the pink one was reserved for the day of your birthday, the shiny chains carefully placed in the corner so they don't get broken in transit.
you had just packed your backpack, changed into a dress that didn't stick to your skin, letting your it breathe and get a relief from the hot summer evening. you admired your skin, wishing for it to stay that clean during the following week. you had refrained yourself from eating chocolate for three whole weeks, and the results finally showed up. you were proud of yourself for not picking on it, and decided to keep a count for it. it'll make you happy when you see a progress each morning.
deep voices travel to your ears, a sign that they have arrived. you didn't expect them to sound this grown up. you expected those soft boyish voices, that match their boy body structures. but once you reach the bottom of the stairs, you stop breathing for a moment. these weren't boys. not at all.
they were men.
eight tall men stood in your living room, patiently waiting and helping your best friend sort out the food orders. one of them stood extra close to her, telling off others if they get too close. could it be?
and as if he knew what you were thinking, he turns his head, eyes looking directly into yours. you stand there, not moving a muscle. you are scared to breathe. a sudden wave of anxiety washes over your body. these were all grown men foreign to you. and then it hits you.
they're all going on a vacation with you. they'll all see you in a bikini, in your dresses, they'll see you drink. they'll probably see you get railed somewhere behind a club. they'll probably see you at your worst when you're near alcohol. fuck.
"oh, there you are! i was already starting to go mad with all these male alphas." she turns to look at them, and one of them sticks his tongue out at her. "let's eat first and then you'll do the introduction and all that shit."
park seonghwa doesn't avert his gaze from you. he smiles, sending you a little wave from across the room and giving you the prettiest eyes you've ever seen in your life. the sparkly irises wake up a volcanic eruption in your stomach; something you haven't felt in a while. the boy- young man- sits down on the floor, his back resting against the sofa. seeing your frozen state, the girl comes towards you, hands resting on your shoulders.
"look, i know it's a bit much for you, and you definitely didn't expect them to look or act this mature and intimidating, - and, well, bulk - but give them a chance. they're really nice and comfy to be around."
you nod, then skim over the group once again. they're all wearing short sweats with basic t-shirts, yet you feel under-dressed. you wished you put something nicer on, like that green flower dress or-
"come on, now. your food is getting cold."
they have spared a seat for both of you on the other sofa, along with a set of forks and plastic plates.
"my friend is a little shy, give her a moment," she announces, and pretends to not notice you glaring from the side. "anyways, enjoy your meals."
everyone eats in silence, occasionally murmuring something among themselves. you take the moment when you're out of focus to scan each one of them. they were all built athletically, with their t-shirts straining against their muscles and the thighs occasionally flexing as they laughed or spoke. then, you stopped at seonghwa. his dark hair was softly falling over his eyes, and his bright teeth showed up every now and then whenever his friends spoke. you watched his hands spin the fork to get the spaghetti easier into his mouth, the veins on his arms distracting you from your own food. he brings the food to his lips, eating in a way so polite, chewing with his mouth closed and no messy ketchup accidents. you were amazed that this man is the little seonghwa with boogers smeared on his star wars t-shirt.
he catches your gaze again, this time smiling wider than before.
"noona, how have you been?"
you wish to bury your face between the sofa cushions. the name he once used to call you because his mother made him, was now used because he himself wanted to. why else would a grown man call you that in the place far from his homeland, where that labeling is not necessary?
"good, seonghwa. very good." you manage to say, cheeks burning as he smiles sweetly at you. "what about you?"
"i've been good, noona. pushing through college, trying not to drop out."
"says the guy with all of his exams at not lower than ninety-five percent," his friend scoffs.
he earns himself a nudge in the ribs, then whines dramatically.
"jongho, you're basically in kindergarten." your friend teases, and the young man acts offended.
"just because i'm the youngest-"
"so, seonghwa's sister's best friend, exactly where are we going and what will we be doing?"
you laugh at the addressing, then set the plate aside. the focus is on you, and your head becomes dizzy for a moment. you feel lost in time and space, and it takes you a while to get back to reality. you're there, surrounded by nine people who are waiting for you to speak instead of staring blankly. it takes one knee pat from your friend to assure you that it's okay to speak, and that they'll listen.
"we'll be staying at bungalows, the small ones you see on insta all the time. which means two to three people per one. i'll make the list later, so we can settle as soon as we arrive and not lose time on organizing."
you continue to explain your plans, but make sure to tell them they're not obligated to follow what you had in mind. still, they all seemed amazed at your ideas that none of them protested. by the end of the meal, the conversation had gone from stiff to comfortable, with multiple people talking and you feeling confident enough to speak up when needed.
"seonghwa is scared of sharks, what do we do about that?"
"i'm not, you dipshit."
"language," you laugh, looking at the bickering young men in front of you.
"sorry, noona," and there it is, the sickeningly sweet smile again. he does it so naturally, it has your heart fluttering.
the conversation about sharks and how harmless they are continues, and your focus shifts on the dessert they brought. you ate a whole plate of your favorite takeout meal, and drank almost three glasses of soda. would they think you eat too much if you took just one cupcake?
you reach for the red velvet delight, your eyes focused on your friend as she scolds the boys for the unnecessary swearing and dirty comments. your fingers brush against something cold, and you look down to find seonghwa reaching for the same cupcake as you. he sees you hesitate, so he splits the dessert in half, leaving the bigger one for you on the plate. you give him a smile of gratitude, then lean back into the leather and listen about dinosaurs and chickens and how they're related.
almost two and a half hours later, you notice them getting sleepy. they help you pick up the trash from the dinner, and then stand in front of you, as if waiting for orders.
"i'll pull out these sofas for four of you, and the other four can fight about two guest bedrooms with a couple bed."
seven of them call dibs, running upstairs to the rooms and fighting along the way.
"like i said, kids."
"oh, i don't think kids can do this."
you look at seonghwa, who was fine with sleeping on a pullout sofa, and raise your eyebrows with amusement, and amazement, as he flexes his arm in front of you. your expression is probably priceless. the veins traveling along his muscular arms are giving you trouble breathing, or existing at all.
"stop flexing in front of my friend, you idiot. she's not impressed."
"right," he says, clicking his tongue and laughing when he gets hit by a pillow. "i'll take it from here. you go rest, noona."
seonghwa takes the covers and pillows from you, making sure to brush his fingers against yours once again, looking into your eyes with a smile while doing so. he could step on you and smile like that, you'd ask him to do it again.
"oh, it's not a problem." you insist.
your friend clicks her tongue, then rolls her eyes. she puts her hands on your shoulders, gently pushing you upstairs to your room.
"if the little turd wants to set up his bed, let him. that's the only use you'll have of him this whole trip."
"i love you too!"
and that's the last thing you hear from him before going inside your room. voices echo through the hallway, coming from the two guest rooms. you hear them play various games to decide who wins the bed, yet when one side wins, they switch to a different game that benefits the other side. they stop only after you've brushed your teeth and changed into sleepwear. you hear multiple heavy footsteps passing by your door, then knocking.
"yes?" you say, looking at the door through the mirror. your fingers don't let go of the halfway braided hair as a head peeks in, eyes quickly scanning the room, then falling on you. you remember the man as wooyoung. he's the social butterfly of the group, that you've noticed.
"nice pj's, noona." he grins, shamelessly staring at your bottom. "pandas look very cute on you."
"wooyoung you come over here right fucking now." hongjoong, you think, warns him. you laugh, still looking at the young man standing at your door, now holding it open for everyone to see inside.
four of them are lined up behind him, trying to sneakily look inside. until hongjoong rushes them all downstairs, then points his finger at wooyoung with a stern look.
"out."
"whoops, gotta go. good night, noona."
the door closes with a loud thud, hongjoong's scolding still travelling through it. it doesn't feel the same when he calls you that. only seonghwa can do it properly. wooyoung seems to be using it in a flirting way, yet seonghwa... he seems genuine with it. he says it so sweetly, with respect. you find yourself excited about hearing it again tomorrow. and the day after it. and the whole week like that. so far, you're having a great time. you can't wait to see what surprises this week has for you.
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after many plane pictures and more scolding from hongjoong and you all the way to the destination, you're finally gathered in front of the most vibrant sea you've ever seen in your life. your body soon falls face first into the mattress, as if you haven't been sitting and sleeping for hours until now. your friend, on the other hand, already had plans to dive into the endless turquoise heaven.
"come on, now. we didn't come to sleep." she throws a pillow at you, which you don't bother to avoid. it lands on your head and stays there, making her giggle. "we have all night to do that."
"if we have all night to sleep, when are you planning to get drunk and laid?" you mumble.
at the other bungalow, park seonghwa is cussing under his breath. he shouldn't have agreed to the trip right away. he should have seen you first. then, when he realizes just how hot you are and how difficult it is to maintain his polite attitude around you, he'd decline the invitation. now, he stands in front of the mirror, scolding himself for not going to the gym when his friends would ask him. and to think you'll see him shirtless at the beach for seven days straight?
then, he realizes. he will see you too. fuck, how will he survive it? to see you in a bikini, with your skin all exposed to the sun? with water drops sliding down your sun-kissed skin? what if you had a tattoo somewhere, like right above your panties on your back?
"seonghwa, are you going?"
his head follows the voice, face blank and brain suddenly frozen. "huh?"
wooyoung snickers, grabbing the deflated beach ball they had brought. "here, make yourself useful until you are capable of leaving this place in a normal shape."
he throws the plastic smelling item at seonghwa, who is now as red as the cocktail wooyoung is already slowly sipping. "it's not what you think-"
"we'll be outside, having fun. without you. bye!"
and just like that, park seonghwa is left alone in his shared bungalow, with a flat beach ball in his hands and a painful erection in his pants. maybe, just maybe, he could skip today.
his plan goes well, and he spends his free time collecting all the discarded sweaty clothes from the flight. carelessly thrown items around the place are now neatly organized on the dresser. he is now wearing a tank top, the one which makes his body look bigger and more formed. just in case he bumps into you. which he hopes he won't. not yet, at least.
he manages to clean the mess in the other bungalows, then proceeds to the last one: his sister and yours. he wonders how bad he would get scolded if he did a little cleaning inside. after all, his sister is a bigger mess than him. he stares at the opened suitcase, disapprovingly scanning the balled up clothes his sister had 'packed'. then, he sees yours. it is perfectly packed, corners neatly tucked so that you don't have to iron and creases won't form on the delicate materials. your side of the space is a drastic difference from his sister's, and it looks like something out of a cartoon.
voices travel to his ears, mingi's dominating. he goes deeper into the room, until he is standing at the other exit looking at the sea, with the net hanging above it. he has seen the view countless times on those influencer instagram accounts and pinterest, but witnessing it all first-hand is truly a breathtaking experience. no signs of sharks yet, though. luckily for him.
but the unlucky part is still here for seonghwa. he catches a glimpse of you in the deep water, your figure swallowed by the vibrant liquid, hiding your form from him. his eyes feel blurry, sudden heat spreading in his body. he's wondering what kind of swimwear you are wearing.
was it a one-piece? the one with the covered front but exposed back? the one exposed on both sides? the one with a deep cut? or the one with a regular cut but high leg? maybe it was a two-piece. maybe it was pastel, it would suit you. you seem like the type of girl to like soft themed things. or maybe you're like that just on the surface. maybe you liked fierce things, like a g-string and triangle top which barely covers your tits. or those panties that are tied up on the sides, and come off with just a pull of a single string.
he feels his swim shorts getting tight again. he looks down, hopeless. this whole trip is going to end him. the man turns around, trying to clear his head. but how is it possible, when he is standing in the middle of your belongings and he can clearly hear your laughter from outside? his eyes fall on your suitcase, again admiring your folding skills. he might have to take a few classes from you.
then, he spots the bikini section in the corner. his eyebrows raise in surprise at the amount you had packed. his fingers reach for the one on top, carefully pulling it out without disrupting the organisation of other items. a brasilian cut hangs from his finger in all its glory, the vibrant green taking all his focus. he spreads it, and exhales once he realizes how high it has to sit on your hips. the matching white top is indeed triangles, with extra long strings. will you wrap them all around your waist like he saw on instagram? or maybe you have your own creative ideas and you'll surprise him?
"seonghwa?"
caught red handed, he stands like a deer on a highway. he feels his knees go weak, barely holding his body up. he stuffs the panties in his pocket, and immediately curses himself. he couldn't have thrown them into the suitcase?
"seonghwa?" you call again, voice dripping honey as you say his name he suddenly loves.
"yes?" he says, voice raspy and tone uneven. he clears his throat, and runs his fingers through his hair. he tries to collect himself before you can see him this messy and flustered. but his cheeks become an even deeper crimson when you step into the room, colour almost matching your swimwear. he has to grit his teeth to keep his jaw from falling. but his eyes betray him. they shamelessly roam your body, taking in everything you are serving him. you're wearing a one-piece today, cuts sitting high up on your legs, and a deep cut going down to your belly button. your hair is falling over your tits, denying him a chance to be a complete creep right in front of you.
"you're missing all the fun." you pout, eyes big as you look up at him.
it takes every ounce in his body to not slam you right there and worship every inch of your body, from the food belly bump to the stretch marks decorated with water drops. he wished to hold your waist, to feel the wet fabric which stayed tight against your skin. he is breathless in front of you, and you haven't done anything but exist.
"seonghwa?" you say once again, calling him out of his fantasies.
"yes, noona?" he breathes out, hoping your eyes stay locked with his until the situation in his pants calms down.
"aren't you going to join us?"
no, i'd rather stay and stroke myself to death thinking about you.
"not today, sorry. i'm not feeling well."
he tries to leave the room, but your fingers press into his chest, pushing him back in front of you. just when he thinks you have discovered his plans and his little crime, he is confused once again. you press your palm on his forehead, then his cheeks. your brows furrow, and he subconsciously mimics your expression.
"well, you are hot. and not the it's summer kinda hot. maybe you should really stay." you say, disappointment evident in your voice.
the last thing he wanted to do is let down the person who made this whole trip and his erection happen. he closes his eyes for a moment, clearing his head as much as he can. "i'll come."
the smile you give him is enough to make him do whatever you want. you have him wrapped around your finger, and you don't even know it.
he spends the day laying in the sun, occasionally napping and waking up when cold water drops hit his hot skin and he feels a figure blocking the sun.
"you're ruining my vibes, san."
"oh, sorry, mr i'm horny for my sister's best friend."
seonghwa's eyes shoot open, and he sits up immediately. san giggles, searching his backpack near seonghwa's head. the man smacks his friend behind the head, resulting in a glare from him.
"stop saying dumb shit, you'll get me in trouble for nothing." he scolds.
san raises an eyebrow, eyes dropping to the man's crotch. seonghwa covers it with a t-shirt, cheeks burning from embarrassment once again.
"wouldn't call that thing a nothing. if anything, it's truly a something."
"you fucking weirdo, get out." seonghwa growls, head falling back on the beach towel. "as if i have any chance with her anyway."
little did he know, you had trouble keeping up the conversation with your friend. the way park seonghwa took off his tank top so sensually, exposing his defined figure so you can drool over it, had you pressing your thighs together underwater. you watch as he smacks his friend for something he has said, then briefly lock eyes with him. his gaze goes from sharp to soft so quickly, and you wonder if he is aware of how much impact his eyes have. awkwardly, you wave towards him, inviting him into the water. you're not sure if he has gotten the message, since he doesn't move from the beach towel. just when you start to shift your attention to the conversation going on near you, you see him stand up.
he steps into the water, shivering at the coldness. as hot as it was, he still felt uneasy entering it.
"ah, seonghwa decided to show up." wooyoung grins, throwing the ball his way.
you hear him cuss when water splashes him from the ball, and your thighs press again when he picks it up, an annoyed look on his face. the serious gaze has your stomach doing back flips, and by now you're sure that you're wet. all for your best friend's brother. you struggle to stop staring, hell, almost drooling, but when he glances at you one more time, you're almost sure that a smirk was on his lips. he then dives into the water, his figure disappearing completely for a few moments. you begin to worry, and you start to swim forwards in hopes you'll catch a glimpse of him somewhere. and then, you gasp.
park seonghwa resurfaces right in front of you, face to face. your jaw drops subconsciously, and if you weren't in deep water, you'd probably search for a place to sit. the young man opens his eyes, ignoring the burning from the salty water. maintaining eye-contact with you, he runs his fingers through his hair, slicking it back so that it doesn't bother him. you watch in awe as water drops glide down his golden cheekbones and lips, toned chest and arms, and you have to fight every urge in your body to not lean in and kiss him right there.
"hi, noona." his lips curve in a sweet smile, the one that has your heart beating a little too fast for two days now.
"seonghwa," you choke out, the poorest greeting that has ever come out of you.
"let's join them, shall we?"
you feel a light touch on the small of your back, and that's when you decide it's enough for today. it's only day one, and if you decide to ruin a vacation or a friendship, you'll do it on the last day. until then, you have to gain control over your body again.
"actually, i'm feeling a bit tired. "
a slight frown appears on seonghwa's face, almost barely noticeable. he pulls his hand back, and you want to whine at the loss of contact. it was only a second, yet you crave his whole existence. you want to feel him all over you, his warmth, his scent, the refreshing water beads and his firm hands on your waist as he fucks you into the hanging net, looking at the sunset over your shoulder. images form in your brain, one, two, three, four. then suddenly, a whole scenario. park seonghwa having you in the water. park seonghwa consuming you in your bungalow as you hide from his sister. park seonghwa making love to you in the moonlight in the shallow water. you breathe out, feeling your chest getting heavy with each thought that rushes through your brain.
"i'll see you at dinner tonight." you wave at the group, then swim past the man that squeezes the filthiest thoughts out of your brain without him even knowing.
you drop down on your bed, sprawled out like a starfish. you stare at the wooden ceiling, trying to collect your thoughts. but how can you, when he looks so goddamn good in those beach shorts and his hair slicked back, with a few strands falling over his eyes? it's been long since you craved someone's touch. fuck, you don't think you've ever craved someone this much. you don't remember wishing for anyone to fuck you in any place you can think of.
meanwhile, seonghwa is busy hiding his frown from the group. you dragged him outside, just for you to run back inside. he'd be lying if he said he wasn't staring at your ass up until the moment you disappeared inside the bungalow. he stays away from his sister, afraid that she might somehow hear his thoughts and become angry. she cannot know about his feelings. nobody can. well, nobody else. his friends weren't blind, but they aren't the ones to rat out a person. it is a chance for seonghwa to stop on time and save his bond with his sister. he can't even begin to imagine the disaster that would happen if she ever knew. besides, you don't look at him that way. for god's sake, he used to fight you all the time as a kid, purposefully sneezing into your face just to see you freak out. he giggles with himself, remembering your angry and crying face while running to tell his mother.
"don't you think you should get out of the water?" the female voice interrupts his thoughts, and he looks at the group that has formed a circle and is playing with the beachball.
"no, why?" san ignores, throwing the ball seonghwa's way.
"everybody's lips are practically green. let me see your fingers. i bet they're pruney as fuck."
a round of protesting and finger examining later, the woman is forcing everybody but seonghwa out of the water. as she swims past him, she makes sure to ruffle his hair, giggling at the result.
"you can stay, but don't make it too long. i don't want you catching a cold on day one. and ruin my vibes."
"don't worry," seonghwa smiles, assuring her that he will obey.
he feels his muscles tighten, a familiar sweet pain forming and telling him that tomorrow will be hell for his body. he hasn't been active for a while, and a little swimming won't kill him. just make him unable to move. and so seonghwa swims, to the boats, to the shore, and towards the bungalows. he lays on his back, absorbing the sun rays and letting his brain roam. they go back to you every time, and it's starting to annoy him. why can't he accept that he can't have you? he must be just way too worked up. surely, he'd fuck anyone if given the chance. he can't possibly have these thoughts only about you. you're his sister's best friend, for fuck's sake. and, you're older than him, which makes it impossible in his head. how could he possibly please you, when he had the least experience in the group? he has only ever done sexual things with his first girlfriend, and since the breakup, he hasn't had any encounters with anyone else. what could he know about pleasing you? maybe you liked it rough? he only knew slow and romantic. though, he is willing to try, for you. did you like it messy and sloppy? or clean and organised? maybe you liked foreplay more.
"seonghwa!"
he opens his eyes, looking the way the voice is travelling. hongjoong is calling him, and just like that, he has to put his brain on hold. he cannot think about you. he mustn't.
"be right there!"
dinner came and went, with the young men ordering simple for day one and eating in the bungalows. you, on the other hand, have ordered the most complicated meal you could, and were now humming with each bite.
"this is better than dick." the woman next to you speaks, mimicking your reactions when eating.
"depends, whose."
"let's say, like, jeffrey dean morgan's."
your jaw drops, offended, "how dare you?"
"fine. mads mikkelsen?"
you nod approvingly. she's not right either way, but how could you possibly know? you haven't tried neither of the two. sadly.
"i need to talk to you." the tone is suddenly low, and the atmosphere is no longer relaxed.
you can feel the tension in the air. she leaves the plate, then turns to sit across from you so she can look at you while speaking.
"yes?" you ask, mimicking her actions.
"seonghwa."
fuck, did she realise what was going on with you? was she going to tell you to stay away from him? was she going to threaten you?
"what about him?" you act stupid, innocently looking into your friend's eyes while the most sinful thoughts roam your head.
"he's a little, like, awkward and antisocial. he gets nervous around pretty girls, and, well, you're one hell of a pretty woman. maybe you could strike up a conversation with him? just to let him know that you're a normal person and he can behave normally around you. without all formal labeling and all that crazy shit he has been doing since he saw you. i mean, noona? seriously?"
that you did not expect. her to encourage you to talk to park seonghwa. you hold back a smile. being too enthusiastic won't look good, and will only make her more suspicious.
"i'll try, sure. but i won't force him into anything."
and you meant it. you won't force him into anything, if you decide to make a move at all. any sign of discomfort, you'll back away. you don't need that. and neither does he.
it isn't long until you have to wake up early, get ready and follow your friend. her part of the vacation was to take canoes and swim towards a little nearby island a few minutes away. good booze and hot guys, she said. so you go, all dolled up in your black bikini that ties up around your waist, and a black lace kimono draped over your shoulders. the young men trail behind you, and you can't help but imagine seonghwa sneakily glancing at your figure. doesn't hurt anyone to daydream.
"here we are. five teeny weeny canoes, two people per one." the woman points towards the famous clear canoes, the ones that allow you to see what you're rowing over. "mingi, come on."
"me?" the man stutters, but doesn't question it any longer when she grabs his wrist and pulls him in the water.
they all hop inside, leaving seonghwa and you still in the sand. the water splashes your legs, refreshing waterbeads inviting, along with the scorching sun. it finally smells like proper summer.
"noona, i think i'm feeling unwell again." he tries, already turning around.
without thinking, you grab his arm, your nails subconsciously digging into his sun kissed skin. he turns around, eyes wide. like a deer on a highway looking at the car in front of it, he stands and waits for something to happen.
"you're not going anywhere. come on, now. hop inside."
seonghwa gulps, his skin burning where your fingers touch him. the sight of your bright summer nails digging into his skin awoke a volcano inside of him, lust spreading in his body slowly and burning, like magma waiting to erupt. you put so little effort, yet you had him harder than he has ever been. he wonders if you'd dig your nails like that when he eats you out. seonghwa is weak just thinking about it; you sprawled out just for him to feast on. his cheeks are already flushed, and he begs heavens to help him erase those thoughts. but how can he get rid of them, when you stand there in front of him, in all your glory? he watches you climb into the little boat, and he has no other choice but to join you. he sits behind you, letting you take control of the rowing and only holding his paddles.
"so, tell me what you've been up to all these years I haven't seen you."
"well, I haven't been up to much. lots of studying, a little less absences, almost perfect grades. it's going fine."
he hears you hum, and he wonders what else you will question him. whatever it is, he must impress you.
"no girls?"
so much for impressing you.
"no," he mumbles, shyly dropping his head, "i'm not that desired."
his breath hitches when you throw your head back so you can look at him, position somehow a huge turn on. "not that desired?"
"y-yeah, I mean," he scratches his neck, avoiding eyecontact, "none of them ever showed interest. I had, like, one girlfriend, and that went horribly."
you hum again, then get back to rowing and following the rest of the group. he now follows your movements, silently moving in sync and definitely not looking at your ass.
"why? if I may know." you push, desperate to know how no girl could want someone like him.
"I guess I'm just a pretty face. she wasn't satisfied with, well, anything. not with the way I communicated, not with the way I ate, sat, studied, even breathed."
he opens up like a book in your hands, ranting about all the times she was angry with him for the most ridiculous reasons, and was at one point just searching for ways to make him leave her so she wouldn't feel guilty. so that's what seonghwa did, with his heart shattered by his first love, who he thought would be his last too. he was the bad guy, yet he didn't do anything wrong.
"oh, can she complain. is there anything that didn't bother her?"
instantly, seonghwa's cheeks go red, and he stutters. you stop rowing, turning your head to look at him over your shoulder.
"seonghwa?"
"well, she always said I, uh," he stops, thinking about whether to tell you, "it's stupid."
you scoff, not believing anything he has to say is stupid. with great difficulties and lots of slipping, you try to turn around towards him, so you can look at him while you talk. your eyes widen with horror when your leg slips on the wet inside of the canoe, hands desperately reaching out for anything for support. you weren't ready for a swim yet.
just in time, the young man reaches forwards, firmly planting his hands on your waist and stabilising your figure. his cheeks are a deep crimson, eyes wide with realisation at the way he's touching you. you don't move, suddenly too aware of your surroundings and the man in front of you.
"she said I had skilled hands," he whispers, subconsciously rubbing his thumb against your skin.
it pains you that you can't just lean in and kiss him right there. if only it were that simple.
"like- like massages, right?" you offer him a way out, gently removing his hands. "and, well, catching things."
"yeah," he laughs, awkwardly looking at the water surrounding you.
"in that case, I could use that little skill of yours."
seonghwa goes red again, and you fight the urge to laugh. he is crumbling in front of you, so small and gentle despite his figure being much bigger than yours. you don't remember ever having this feeling of the upper hand. it is new, and it's setting your whole body on fire. your fingers yearn to move that strand of hair that has fallen over his pretty eyes.
"I could use a massage."
and with a wink, you start rowing again, this time staying in the other position and facing him.
the day is loud and quick. wooyoung is tipsy, hongjoong has embarrassed himself three times already, and san is almost desperate for the waitress that had the thinnest waist you've ever seen in your life. right away, your appetite is gone. your gaze drops down to your body, suddenly feeling heavy and stuffed. everyone is already at their second plate from the buffet, and you're still playing with the one from an hour ago.
"noona?" 
when you don't respond, because you know just what they will tell you, you feel a soft touch under the table on your ankle. you raise your head, ready to scold wooyoung for inappropriate touching. but then you see seonghwa's worried gaze, eyes big and shiny as he looks at you, then your plate. nobody else is paying attention, half of them having stood up to do karaoke and make complete fools out of themselves.
"is it not tasty? do you want to exchange plates?"
you look at his plate filled with fruit, and it looks much more acceptable than your grease filled plate. just what were you thinking?
"I'll just try something..." you reach towards it, stabbing into a mango,"...if i may?"
he smiles, his eyes somehow prettier when he does so. you are mesmerized, and you feel like you've been staring at him for hours. you wouldn't mind doing so, when he is a walking sculpture.
"of course you may, noona. that is why i offered."
"you know, you don't have to call me noona. you can call me by my name."
"i'm not sure i can do that."
"sure you can. try it."
he stuffs his mouth with fruit, pointing towards it as an excuse for not speaking. you laugh, watching him cutely chew and wiggle his legs under the table in the process.
"cute," you say, getting up to empty your plate.
you don't miss the way he stops eating for a while, ears and cheeks a matching red with the strawberries on his plate.
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it is past midnight when you hear water splashing, and taking the nosiness from your parents, you have to get up and see what is going on. you stand at the edge of the opened glass doors, scanning the night view. the sky is clear, and no light pollution allows you to see millions of shiny dots sprinkled on it. one particular shiny dot reminds you of the way his eyes sparkle, and you catch yourself just in time before diving further into the thoughts. you've spent too much time thinking of him, and it's not doing any good to you. not when everything is starting to remind you of him.
your gaze drops on the figure in the water, and you curse under your breath. still, it's a hot night, and a perfect opportunity for you to relax without the group swarming around you like usual. it doesn't take long to change into a bikini, careful not to wake up your sleeping roommate. but even if she knew, she was the one who asked you to talk to him. so that's what you'll do. talk.
you sit in shallow water, and watch the moonlight caress his skin. he swims, back and forth, disappears under the water once in a while. then, when he comes back to the surface, he throws his head back, runs his fingers through his hair and rubs his eyes from ocean salt. whatever is clouding his mind, he could really use a conversation.
just when you want to step into the water and join him, he turns his head, eyes locking with yours. he dives in again, this time staying there longer. but after yesterday, you trust him. he doesn't need you panicking when he was simply searching for a calm swim.
even though he did it once already, when he resurfaces right in front of you, repeating the hair motion you so intensely watched, not once breaking eye-contact, you can't help but shamelessly stare.
"seonghwa," you greet, lips curving upwards and mimicking his smile.
"noona," he says, not moving a muscle.
his hands are firmly pressed in the sand, holding his body so that he is hovering in the water. you have your knees pressed to your chest, the beach lace cardigan loosely hanging off your shoulders.
"what's on your mind?" you ask.
your chin rests on your knees, hands hugging your legs as you examine his facial expressions. the young man sighs, and the smile fades away. he drops his head, thinking of ways to lie to your face.
"seonghwa," you call.
when he doesn't respond, you place your hand under his chin, gently lifting it so that he can look at you. he is surprised at the sudden contact, not hiding it in the slightest. big irises match the starry sky, an endless sparkle and mystery.
"talk to me, love."
and just how was he supposed to tell you he went for a cold swim to calm his erection? it has been difficult for two days now, and he can't take care of himself. not with so many people around him. not with you right near him.
"is it the girls talk?"
"no, no, of course not." he quickly denies, trying to move away from you.
"stay there," you ask, your other hand firmly placed on his bare shoulder. "i quite like this position."
you indeed like it; him laying in front of you, looking at you from below, and you having him right there in your hand, completely vulnerable.
"now, tell me. is it the girls talk on the canoe?"
"maybe."
"maybe?" you raise an eyebrow, thumb subconsciously rubbing his jawline.
"i don't know how to please a girl," he blurts out. "i guess my hopes were too high for this trip."
"don't be silly, sure you do."
he snorts, tearing his gaze away. "you wouldn't understand."
"why is that?"
"you're telling me that a girl would enjoy an inexperienced man? imagine me taking one home, just for her to find out i can't even put it in."
you bite the inside of your cheek. you think, for what seems like an hour. he lays there, water caressing his bare torso, eyes looking up at you for further comfort. you cup his cheeks, your brain coming to a stop and letting your heart gain control.
"noona?" he stutters, eyes dropping down on your lips.
"there's more to it than just putting it in, seonghwa."
he is a blabbering mess, defending himself and saying that he knows, it was just a saying. you let him speak, watching his plump lips move as he struggles to put a sentence together. your intense gaze isn't helping his messy state at all, and he decides to simply give up. he drops his head again, a sigh escaping his lips.
"tell me, would you waste your time with someone who can't even kiss?"
"if i'm a little fond of that person, yes."
he looks up at you, expression unreadable. his silence gives you encouragement, and you lean back and slowly peel your legs open. you feel feverish, watching his parted lips and gaze fixed on your body. the night is calm, water climbing up and down the shore, caressing seonghwa's toned back. you would be lying if you said that the simple touch on his shoulder didn't make you all worked up. he was warm, firm, inviting to bite and scratch. his eyes follow up your body, and stop at your bikini top. the lace slides down your arms, pooling in the sand and giving him a free view.
"come closer," you whisper.
when he fails to move, your hand raises his head once again so he can look into your eyes.
"you need to touch,"
your hand grabs his wrist, pulling it out of the water and placing it on your hip.
"you need to get close,"
you tug at his bicep, inviting him out of the water and closer to you.
"you need to feel,"
you drag his hand up your leg, over the edge of your briefs, and place it on your side. he comes out of the water, hovering over you and holding his body up with his free hand. slowly, you lay back into the sand, giving him space so he can comfortably lay over you.
"you need to want it."
"i want it," he whispers into your lips, holding himself back.
"then come and get it."
a groan leaves his mouth, and he is eager to grab your waist with both of his hands. his wet skin against your dry one makes you shiver, cold water drops rolling from his body onto yours. his plush lips press into yours, gently taking in your bottom lip and giving it a soft caress with his tongue. he repeats it, giving sweet kisses and equal attention to both lips. his fingers dig into your waist, the nervous feeling spreading over his body and making it painfully obvious. you place your arms around his neck, fingers creeping into his wet hair and giving his scalp a gentle scratch. you swipe your tongue over his bottom lip, tasting salty water. he pulls away, face flushed and lips plump.
"feel me up, seonghwa," you drag the tips of your fingers and nails down his arms, down to his lower back, and back up to his shoulders, "like this."
he shivers at the sensation, and without a single further touch yet, he is already growing hard thinking of ways he could feel you.
"don't think too much."
peeling himself off of you, he kneels between your spread legs. your eyes close, you know you can trust him. a sigh of sensation leaves your lips, feeling his hands almost hovering over your sides, stomach, and down your legs. he makes his way back up, feeling every inch you had to offer him.
"want to add another pair of panties to your little collection?" you tease, a smirk dancing on your lips.
"w-what?" he stutters, his hands stopping at your hips.
"you think i wouldn't notice i'm missing one of my favorite panties?"
you hear no response. you eyes peel open, lazily looking into his scared ones. it is so adorable how new he is to all of this, and so hot that you get to teach him about it. you have him on his knees, quite literally, and it feels like you've been given a puppy for training. and you just can't wait.
"you can keep them, don't worry. i'll get rid of these too." you raise an eyebrow, and place his hand on the waistband. "soon, i hope."
he doesn't move. his cheeks are flaming, and the tips of his ears even worse. he looks lost. a whole feast in front of him, and yet he doesn't know where or when to start.
"there are too many clothes in the way, don't you think?" you help him out, reaching behind to pull at the string that is holding your bikini top.
you drag his hand up your body, resting it on the crease between your breasts. he gulps, loud. it makes you chuckle, and makes him look away.
"seonghwa," you call.
"yes?"
"you don't want it." 
"i do—"
not so gently anymore, you grab his jaw, tilting his head back towards you and pulling him close. he shivers at your nails digging into his cheeks, and to say that he wasn't drowning in lust from your stern look and tone would be the lie of the century.
"then fucking take it."
his hands cup your breasts, exploring the softness and size of them. he massages them, watching your face and searching for a sign that he is doing it right. but you only lay down, eyes closed, not a single sound leaving your pretty lips.
he pulls at the bikini triangles, exposing your chest to the warm night and himself. he cups them again, this time thumbs rolling your nipples. you merely hum, and look at him through half closed eyelids. he has gotten closer, eyes examining your sensitive buds and the way his fingers played with them.
"tongue, baby," you say, holding back moans. "nipples are sometimes more sensitive than the clit, and you have to— oh, yes, just like that."
seonghwa is good at listening, that you are familiar with. he drags his wet muscle over your tense bud, then again, and again. he takes care of you with soft kitten licks, occasionally taking the bud between his lips and gently sucking.
"look at me."
his eyes lock with yours, hazy with lust. you watch as he rolls your nipples between his lips and fingers, sending gentle waves of pleasure through your body. he moves to the other one, giving it equal attention. your hips subconsciously buck into his knee, searching for friction. he pulls away, letting his fingers work. he slowly touches you, teases your sensitive area as slow as he can. he enjoys taking it slow, that you've noticed. you wish you could orgasm from just nipple teasing, but it isn't that easy.
"am i doing it right?" he asks, massaging you as he pinches your buds with his fingers.
"of course, baby."
"i'm not getting any reactions from you," he frowns, hands dropping back on your waist.
"well, we have just started. you need to work me up, give me a little attention before the real thing."
"real thing?" he stutters. "we are having sex tonight?"
"not tonight." you assure him, and almost laugh when you see him sigh with relief. "keep going."
he follows your instructions, dragging his hands to your waist and hooking his fingers into the waistband.
"you have to feel first."
he stops to do exactly what you have told him. his fingers dip between your legs, and press into your warm crotch. due to the thin material, he can feel your bottom lips through the panties. it makes him bite his lip to keep him from groaning. he slides his fingers up and down, hoping to get a noise or two from you. when he doesn't, he lowers his body so that he is hovering over your crotch. he moves the panties aside, immediately tasting you and catching you off guard. your hand reaches towards his hair, fingers grabbing at the strands as he rolled your bud between his lips. his tongue teases the tip of the clit, spinning it in circles and making your hips buck into his lips.
"press a little harder, baby," you encourage, pushing his head into your skin.
when he delivers a particularly strong lick, followed by a suck, you moan. your thighs close around his face, and when his arms grab them and force you to spread your legs for him, you lose it. you are a moaning mess, his dominant side coming out of him without him even noticing. you want him to be rough with you, to snap his hips into yours hard, to mercilessly overstimulate you, to kiss you while he stuffs you with his cock.
something about watching him give your clit slow kitten licks is throwing you into a whole different world. he has his hand placed on your lower stomach, tugging at the skin so that he can reach your clit better. placing his fingers on your soaking folds, he looks up at you, finally satisfied with the results.
he rubs you in circles, slow, then fast, then licks you a few more times. he tugs your clit between his lips, tongue swirling around it and fingers spreading your folds as he does so. nobody has ever eaten you out with such passion, and seeing him make out with your bottom lips only makes you want to take him into your mouth until he is begging you to stop.
your orgasm announces its arrival, pooling at the bottom of your stomach and waiting to erupt.
"seonghwa," you gasp.
he hums, eyes still locked with yours. you yank at his hair, trying to pull his head away from you before you can cum on his tongue. but he is much stronger than you, and much more stubborn than you. another gasp leaves your mouth, and your arms find themselves planted in the sand, your wrists firmly trapped in his hands. your legs are clenching around his head, and after a few minutes of making it difficult for him, he presses his knee against your thigh. you are trapped under his firm grip, your most sensitive spots completely at the mercy of his soft lips and hot tongue.
"seonghwa—" you choke out, orgasm swallowing your body and lifting it up from the sand.
you shake in his hands, body working on the waves of pleasure ripping through your figure and blinding your vision. you don't even notice that your hands are now free, and his are pressed on your thighs again. he is doing his best to help you ride it out, generously giving your folds soft kisses and an occasional graze with his tongue. he admires your face from below, taking in every reaction you have to offer him. your body shakes in his hands, aftershocks of pleasure still very much active. your shallow breathing and quiet gasps fill his ears, and his brain makes sure to remember this picture of you forever.
he doesn't know whether you're faking it or he really did it, but he knows for sure that the way your wet hole clenches around nothing is making his cock twitch in his pants. he isn't far from cumming; one stroke from you and he would be done. and humiliated.
you look down, finally capable of forming a sentence other than "fuck" and "oh shit". seonghwa plants a final kiss on your lower stomach, then proceeds to press his body above you one more time.
"did i do good?" he asks, worry taking over his features.
"no."
his eyes widen, and his cheeks become a deep crimson which you can see even in the dark. something snaps inside of you, seeing his vulnerable and innocent state. originally, you wanted to tell him that he did better than good. but to have the upper hand and break him little by little, until he snaps and takes you from behind and fills you up with his seed? sounds way more inviting. how mean.
"it was okay," you caress his cheek, eyes roaming his pretty face, "but a woman needs more than just an orgasm."
"i rushed." he realizes.
"you rushed." you confirm, then push him off of you.
he almost whines at the loss of contact, but he has embarrassed himself enough for one night. he was so eager to make you moan and cum on his tongue, that he didn't think further. what if he has blown the single chance he had to impress you? what if you had hopes for him, but he let you down, and now you don't wish to try anything with him anymore?
the words are stuck in his throat, refusing to leave. he wants to say so much, but afraid that he might ruin this little dignity he has, he settles for watching you stand up and get dressed. the lace cardigan slides on your body just right, hiding your curves and only exposing your chest. he wonders how you can just stand up and move on, like you didn't shake in his hands just minutes ago.
"was this just a lesson for me?" his voice almost cracks behind you. "like, a one time thing?"
when you only spare him a glance over your shoulder, then start walking back to the bungalows, he falls into the sand. he spreads his arms and legs, imitating a starfish, and helplessly looks at the night sky. one chance, and he blew it. it isn't his fault you caught him off guard. he wasn't ready. he swears he could do so much more, if only you would've let him one more time. he curses himself for being impatient, and more stubborn than obedient. though, he is always obedient when it comes to you, his stubborn side had to find a way to make an appearance tonight.
his head falls to the side, eyes following your figure as you walk away from the shore. he is tired, from thinking more than swimming or, well, pleasuring you. though the latter didn't take long.
"fucking idiot."
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another day passes, spent in the town center exploring street food and sweets. you buy souvenirs, all sorts of them. even the overpriced little magnets. you must have them all. the boys are filming everything, from the making of the ice cones to your face devouring it. you ride rented motorcycles, wooyoung holding onto your waist and screaming into your ear whenever you speed up. your friend catches up soon, holding onto her brother whose gaze only focused on the road in front of him.
the rest trail behind, ice cones in their mouth and tongues stuck out proud and green from the kiwi flavor. the whole time you've spent together, seonghwa stays aside, avoiding you at all costs. it is only when they go separate ways that he spares you a glance, much like you did to him last night. only his eyes are big and yearning, but yours were cold and uninviting.
you bite your cheek, watching as he licks the ice cone the boys have gotten for him. he isn't aware of his sensual way of eating it, and you hope his sister isn't aware of you staring at it.
you shop until you collapse, your bed suddenly the most comfortable place on Earth. you aren't sure how you'll fit all the items in the suitcase, but you'll leave the worrying part for the last day.
you now stand in front of the mirror, putting the clip in your hair and thinking whether or not you're satisfied with your appearance. even if you weren't, there was no time to change anything. you just had to obey your impatient friend.
eager to get drunk and laid, she orders shots, finishing four by the time you've only done one. she is tipsy and leaning into you, trying to tell you something over the loud club music. you laugh, hoping that she didn't ask a question. you simply don't have the energy to figure out what she is trying to say.
the boys are scattered on the dance floor, mainly making fools out of themselves and each other, trying to get most of this vacation. girls look at them, more with interest than worry because of their behaviour. you spot four familiar heads on the dance floor, and three are sitting on the couch with the two of you. the eighth one is missing.
"where's seonghwa?" you ask, trying to look and sound as careless as possible.
"we made him go to the bar." says san.
"yeah, he seriously needs to get laid."
the boys laugh at hongjoong's words, and even your friend giggles. but you don't find anything funny in that. your eyes roam the bar, in hopes to find the fluffy wavy hair and a pair of big shiny eyes. your neck hurts, raising your head every time someone gets close to the table, in hopes that it's seonghwa. but seonghwa is nowhere to be seen. until you stand up and make your way through the dance floor towards the bar.
you spot him, leaning on the bar with a drink in his hand. the girl in front of him is twirling the ends of her hair, hips swaying with the beat. your teeth sink into your cheek, keeping yourself from acting up. then, she reaches towards his hair, feeling the softness much like you did last night.
"noona!"
the voice comes from behind you, and a pair of arms touch your sides.
"wooyoung," you greet, turning around to wrap your arms around his neck.
fuck seonghwa. he's not yours. he can talk to whoever he wants to. and you're not his. so when wooyoung presses his lips against yours, you don't complain. his lips are hot against yours, and when comparing to seonghwa, much more skilled and confident. his hand grips your waist, pressing you into his firm body as he does body rolls to the beat of the music.
"fuck, noona, you're so hot." he groans into your mouth.
"am i now?" you tease, placing your hands on his and sliding them down to your ass.
"are you kidding me? with your hair in a clip like that, and your lip gloss, and your thongs sticking out of these incredibly tight jeans? i could just—"
"wooyoung."
the grip on your ass is gone, and the heated moment between you two is shattered. your eyes stare at seonghwa's side profile, watching his jaw clench as he tells wooyoung he needs you for a minute. the younger man removes his hands from your body, and then looks at you.
you don't get to protest, your wrist already in his hand and your legs following him outside.
"hey, what the fuck? let go of me!"
and he does let go. but when he does, it is by slamming you against the wooden wall of the club.
"how can you calmly kiss my friend like that after humiliating me last night?"
you take your time to admire him properly. he is wearing one of those over worn hawaiian shirts, all buttons undone and a single necklace resting on his sun kissed neck. he smells like sun protection and aftershave, and his hair is fluffier than usual.
"do you want to break me? do you want to see me at my lowest?"
"i don't know what you're talking about, seonghwa. go back inside."
"what, does he kiss better?" he bites the inside of his cheek, and his jaw clenches a lot more than usual.
"he does have more experience." you remain calm, a monotone tone leaving your lips when you speak to him. "this is all just fun. we're doing this for fun. nothing serious involved."
"then," he reaches forwards, cupping your face," let me fuck you. for fun."
"what? no."
you push him away once again, and start walking away. he gets deja vu, but this time, he speaks up.
"why? you were just seconds away from sitting on wooyoung's cock. why is it a problem when it's me?"
you turn around, still walking backwards towards the entrance. he is almost drunk, and surely doesn't know what he is saying.
"you're just not that type."
"not that type?"
"you know. you're soft. you don't fuck. you make love."
and you can't make love right now. you want him to break you, fuck you in positions that have you helpless and gripping at his built body, to make you beg for mercy as he drives you to your fifth orgasm.
and there he is, again, standing alone, helpless and horny. his legs carry him inside again, to the bar, and back to the girl he wasn't even interested in. he leans in, mimicking wooyoung's moves he did on you. when the girl moans in his mouth, it gives him a boost of confidence. he just hopes you sit there somewhere, watching this unfold.
"fuck, wanna take this outside?" she gasps, hips rolling into his.
seonghwa doesn't need to be told twice. he is thrown on one of the beach chairs, the girl already on her knees in front of him. he breathes heavily, heart beating so hard he swears it could jump out any moment. the alcohol in his veins made it impossible for him to be uncomfortable from the company around him. they didn't even flinch. situations like these are a regular occurrence for them.
"oh, shit, you're huge."
his cheeks burn at the compliment. the first few licks make seonghwa twitch in his sleep, but by the time she has him in his mouth, he is passed out. he was at the verge when he pressed you against that wall, and if he had just drunk two shots less, he would've proved that he can do better than you think.
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in the morning, he finds himself wrapped in clean white sheets. he blinks slowly, his eyes getting used to the strong light.
the surroundings are unfamiliar, and for a second, he fears that he might've slept with the girl from last night. but when he sees your almost bare figure in front of him, back turned and hair falling over your shoulders, he silently gasps. that can't be true. he didn't sleep with you. did he?
he checks under the cover, and becomes even more confused when he sees he is fully dressed.
"i didn't sleep with you, seonghwa." you answer before he manages to put a sentence together.
"she did sleep with me, however."
"wooyoung." you warn.
seonghwa sits up on the bed, and looks around the room. wooyoung is also sitting on the bed. your bed. seonghwa sighs, feeling his heart tighten. he looks at you through the mirror, where you stood to fix your bikini. you catch him staring, and your lips twitch into a smirk when seeing his flustered expression.
"headache?"
"what am i doing here if we didn't sleep together?" he asks, the alcohol in him still a little active.
"first, you were passed out with a girl all over you, so i brought you to my bed since your sister spent the night with some guy anyway. second, i would never sleep with a drunk guy. at least not that drunk."
"can't believe you fell asleep mid blow job." wooyoung teases, glancing at his older friend.
"well, if it was any good, i doubt he would've fallen asleep." you come to rescue, deciding that he has suffered enough teasing for the morning. "right?"
"right," seonghwa agrees, scratching his neck.
"luckily, that's not the case with you, noona."
"wooyoung, get out."
"of course, baby."
seonghwa is now alone with you, eyes still trailing up your body. somehow, even though his friend had you before him, he still wants you just as bad as the day before.
"he's bluffing, don't listen to him."
"is he, though?"
you sigh. you did have fun with wooyoung last night, but it didn't go to the point of having sex. even though it was very hard to keep your hands off him. he is passionate, and rough, just how you like it.
"go get dressed, seonghwa. we are leaving soon."
"why won't you fool around with me, just like you did with him?"
his words make you sigh again. you leave your lip-gloss on the dresser, then sit on the bed.
"you don't ask. you just start it, then see where it gets you. i gave you the green light for that. but i told you last night, and i'll tell you again. i realize you're just not the type. you're too soft for me."
"then teach me."
at this point, he has no regrets and refuses to be embarrassed. he wants wooyoung's confidence, his passion for sexual activities, and his charm. all he has is a figure, which is not enough to satisfy you.
"teach you?"
"yes."
"you're out of your mind, seonghwa."
you have him right where you wanted him. right in your hand, like a marionette. you decide his moves, and he obeys, like the cute little doll he is.
"noona," he whispers, desperation dripping from his lips like sweetest honey, "please."
your fingers reach towards the loose strands of hair falling over his glossy eyes. neatly tucking them behind his ear, you bring his face close to yours.
"this time," your lips brush against his as you speak, "listen to what i say. if i say stop, you stop. got it?"
"got it." he nods.
"good."
as slow and soft as possible, you press your lips into his. he exhales, relaxing further into your hands. you are one step away from pushing him back on the bed, and all it takes is just a touch from him. ironically, as if he hears you, he rests his hands on your waist, and you don't resist anymore. you push him on the mattress, laying flat against his warm body.
"your boobs are soft." he comments, noticing the way they are pressed against his chest.
"aw, thanks, bub."
so easy to make him blush. he kisses you this time, tongue hungrily searching for yours. he hums when you finally give in, allowing him to take in the taste of you.
"hey, anyone seen my brother? did he come back last night?"
you pull away, jumping to the other side of the room to buy yourself time to fix your hair and put on a beach kimono, back turned towards him. you glance at seonghwa over your shoulder, and it is enough to make your heart flutter. he is flustered, eyes shiny and big as he panics while his sister's voice is becoming louder and louder. his lips shine from your lip gloss, and his hair is a fluffy mess. oh, you want to have him squirming and milking in your hands.
"ah, there you are! i've- woah, what happened here?"
"not what it looks like-" seonghwa stutters, but you are quick to interrupt.
"he is feeling a bit feverish from last night. he fell asleep in sweaty clothes with the window open."
too hung over to think, she waves it off, turning towards her suitcase in a search for a bikini for today's adventure.  you hear seonghwa exhale, and you turn around to wink at him. he seems calmer, seeing how relaxed you are.
"seonghwa, now that you're feeling better, you want to go and get ready?"
"huh? oh, yes. yes, of course."
you watch him as he tries his best to hide the bulge in his pants, eyes full of panic as he walks away hoping his sister doesn't turn around.
"see you, honey."
"see you, noona."
he leaves the room, and you see him through the window picking up his pace and running into his own. you can't help the smile that creeps onto your face, watching his messy hair bounce, and his hand wipe off the lip gloss from his lips.
"what an idiot." his sister comments, sitting on the bed and carelessly taking off her top and bra.
"aw, come on. he's being such a good boy, why are you calling him that?"
"noona? seriously? he is a piece of shit to me, and he is so nice to you. that asshole."
"he's cute, let him be."
she makes a mocking face your way, then starts to get dressed.
the day is hotter than ever. you are laying in the shades of nature, yet you are sweating so bad that you might actually get into water. you don't feel like it today. you just want to lay down on the fancy beach chair, hiding under your big sun hat, and daydream. about seonghwa.
"you know, i met a guy last night, and let me tell you! his friend is drop dead gorgeous. i told him about you."
you scoff, but don't give any other reaction. you know where she is going with that.
"what? not interested?" she questions.
you laugh, taking the hat from your face and placing it properly on your head. you glance over at the boys, who sat down just beneath you on the bright shark towels. seonghwa is busy squeezing his hair, and doesn't yet realize that you are shamelessly staring at him.
"not really, no," you finally answer, tone disinterested and distant.
"wasn't your plan to have a one night stand of your lifetime on this vacation?"
that seems to pick up seonghwa's attention. he sits down, acting unbothered as he opens his bag of candied almonds. his side eye is very obvious to you though, and his cuteness only increases when you notice small things like that.
"that still stands."
"well?"
"well, i think i already have my eye on someone. someone... younger."
"oh?"
the young man turns his head slightly, just enough to look at you without his sister noticing. you wink at him, and when he blushes, you can't help but smile proudly. you've never had a man behave so giddy because of you, and you are living for it.
"who's the lucky guy?"
"i'm not too sure if he's interested in me yet."
seonghwa turns towards you in disbelief, as if trying to ask you how you could think such a thing. but seeing the playful glint in your eyes, he relaxes.
"can i have one?" you ask, pointing at the candied almonds.
"sure," he mutters, turning the bag towards you.
you wink at him again, before opening your mouth and sticking your tongue out a little. his cheeks are the usual red, eyes wide and frantically looking over at his sister and friends. but none of them really pay attention. even if they do, the sight would simply seem playful to them. after all, they do not know about your secret little interactions.
he carefully aims the single almond towards your mouth, and when you so flawlessly catch it, you could've sworn that his jaw had dropped just a little. he is feeding your ego, and he won't regret it.
"good boy," you mouth, hoping he would catch it.
he does, his eyes wide in shock. you love getting reactions from him.
time is slow, the boys having lost interest in the sea and opting to play games and bickering on the towels. the sun is still high up in the sky, not yet ready to end the day. you cannot stop ogling at seonghwa, who is currently trying to doze off but is constantly bugged by something.
"what is it, ddeong?"
ddeong? that's very cute.
"my head really hurts. i wanted to take a nap but it's pounding so bad." he complains, rubbing his temple.
"guess it's your lucky day, because my bestie here gives the best scalp massages."
oh, right. you do. that's so clever, and she doesn't even know it.
"yeah, why don't you come over and i'll show you?" you ask, as innocently as you can.
glancing over at wooyoung and seeing his smirk, you know he knows. the dipshit knows everything. but he isn't the type to rat you out. you hope.
seonghwa stands up, cluelessly looking at you and trying to figure out how to do this.
"sit down, silly." you pat the space in the sand between your legs.
he finally sits, slowly resting his back on the edge of the beach chair and closing his eyes. there, you have him right between your legs, in your hands. not the way you want, but you can still work your magic. his hair is soft between your fingers, and you swear you've never felt such hair on a man before. seonghwa is very neat, that you've noticed. not like all those men that you've dated. it feels nice to have someone so clean and pretty in your hands.
he sighs as you put pressure on his scalp, nails softly grazing him. he is having the time of his life, and you can't help but smile when he lets his head fall back, resting on the chair between your thighs. so close to your already leaking cunt. wonder if he can feel it.
"feeling better?" you ask, seeing that he isn't doing anything aside from breathing.
he doesn't answer. you continue your motions, watching his features carefully. he has the prettiest pink lips, and the most perfect eyebrows. he is just so... fresh. and young.
"seonghwa?" you call again.
no answer. you tug at a strand of hair gently, jolting him awake. what you didn't expect was the whine that escaped his lips, and you find yourself trying to squeeze your thighs together. he realizes his mistake, and looks at you with horror.
"y-yes?" he stutters.
"uh, i just-"
you are at a loss for words. he is so unintentionally submissive, it is driving you crazy. 
"i think i'll go in the water."
and just like that, he grabs a floatie you had brought and almost runs to the water. your eyes follow his poor attempts at climbing the armchair shaped floatie, his hands continuously slipping from the water and slippery surface. he tries a few more times, until he almost gets it, but ends up falling back into the water and flipping the floatie upside down.
"god, what an idiot." his sister scoffs, putting on her sunglasses and hiding under her book.
"aw, stop. i'm gonna go help him." you laugh fondly, eager to get alone time with him.
"don't waste your time. jesus, look at him. i can't take it, please poke my eyes out."
you also wish to poke your eyes out. seonghwa is surrounded by three or four girls, all of them making sure he's okay, laughing and being all touchy with him. you're not liking that. you're not liking the way their nails are grazing his arms, while he is still processing what is going on around him. he is clueless, and only awkwardly smiles with them. for a split second, his eyes land on you, as if asking for help. but then he looks away, back to the girls, and relaxes. his mouth moves, and the girls go into a laughing fit. just what is he doing? he isn't that funny.
"huh. how about that. my brother can rizz up girls?"
"no offence, but nobody uses that word anymore." wooyoung chips in, and earns himself a smack on the back of his head.
"shut up. seriously though, look at him. and four at once? wait, where are you going?"
you almost throw the hat and kimono at your friend, and fix your hair. hell no.
"hey? i thought you aren't getting into the water today! why is everyone so weird today?" her voice is becoming distant, and the ones in front of you are getting louder.
ha-ha, so funny. you are dying to know just what it is that have them drooling over him and forcing their laugh.
"hwa?" you call, lowering your sunglasses just enough so he can look into your eyes.
"uh, yes?" he answers, completely smitten.
oh, yes.
if someone were to film you, the scene would really look like one from a movie where the rich older woman is seducing her pool boy, all while her husband is working up in his bedroom. and you like it. you adjust your bikini top, accidentally pushing your boobs together, and finally get into the water.
the girls have their eyebrows raised at you, and seonghwa only gulps. it's as if he knows he did something that is bothering you. behind the playful smirk you are giving him, he sees the mischievous glint in your eyes. he knows he fucked up big time.
"having trouble with your floatie?"
"well, yeah, kinda. i got water in my ear and eyes."
"aw, you poor thing. let me see."
you cup his cheeks, swiping your thumbs over his closed eyes. the girls are scoffing, murmuring, and you would've felt very self conscious before. but this trip and seonghwa have fueled your confidence, and you are not scared of a pair of younger girls that know nothing more than to act dumb in front of him.
"feeling better?"
"yeah, real better. excellent in fact." he is a blubbering mess, looking between you and the girls.
"wanna get on the floatie with me?"
"yes."
"come on, then. say bye to your friends."
you swim off into deep water with the floatie, slow enough so he can catch up to you. you turn the floatie so that the backrest is turned towards the shore, and you are looking into the islands far away.
"go on, get on it."
"uh, i couldn't get on it in the shallow water. what makes you think-"
"seonghwa. get on the floatie."
he struggles again, wet hands slipping against the surface, now worse because you are right there, watching him. he finally climbs up, throwing his head back and exhaling.
"god, this was worse than the runs i do in the mornings back home."
he sits silent, eyes closed and sun bathing. when he hears nothing from you, he opens one eye, silently questioning why you aren't joining him. i mean, you came for that, didn't you?
"your headache still bothering you?"
"your massage helped, i did doze off for a while. until you started pulling my hair. which, by the way, what was that about?"
"it's going to sound stupid, but you seemed a bit too calm. i don't know. i fear those things."
"what, you thought i was dead?" he laughs.
"shut up, paranoia isn't that fun, you know? i'm currently in deep water, actually dying from fear that a shark will appear and feast on my legs."
"then get up here with me," he offers, patting the space next to him.
"oh, i'm fine right here." you place your hands on his knees, putting your body between his thighs.
"wh-what are you-"
"i'm gonna need you to be quiet."
"for what?"
"hush."
"noona-"
"hush i said." you pinch his thigh, earning a whimper. "now, be a good boy and hold my hair up so i don't make a mess. yet."
he looks at you wide eyed, finally realizing what your intention is. he gulps, feeling his swim shorts become tight. there's just something about your long nails grazing his skin and you giving him your best siren eyes from between his legs that is making his blood boil.
"hwa, baby, you have to stop being so stiff."
he melts in your hands at the nickname, and melts even more when you slip your hands in his shorts and gently pull him out. he is hard, and warm, and you can't wait to get your tongue on him. his hand finally reaches for your hair, pulling it in a messy ponytail and subconsciously guiding your head towards his cock.
"so impatient. again."
"sorry," he stops his movements.
you tease him, slowly running your thumb around his tip, not yet giving him the friction he needs. he squirms in your hands, unable to relax. he isn't used to risky situations like this. hell, he isn't used to a situation like this anywhere.
"hey," you call, seeing his panicked expression. when he looks at you, you can't help but smile fondly at him, and reach to move his long strands of hair out of his eyes. "i'll let you know if things get risky, like if anyone starts approaching. trust me. alright?"
"alright," he gulps.
"good."
wasting no time, you stick out your tongue, licking a stripe from the base up to his leaking tip, and pull him between your lips. his breath hitches, and his grip in your hair tightens. seonghwa throws his head back, letting his eyes roll and small sighs leave his lips.
using the chance when he's not looking, you pull your bikini top aside, letting your breasts fall free. you take his other hand, placing it gently on your now bare breast. he squeezes it subconsciously, making you hum around his cock. he tastes warm and salty, and you enjoy taking in every inch he has to give and explore it with your tongue. you just can't wait to sit on it. hopefully soon.
"i'm gonna cum- i think-"
you pull him out, making sure to make a popping noise on purpose.
"already?" you tease, still gently stroking him.
"sorry..." he looks down at you, blush creeping up his cheeks.
"it's okay, bun. just relax this time. we'll have plenty of chances to practice your patience."
"we will?" he asks, eyes full of hope as he looks into yours full of mischief.
"honestly..." you drag off, teasing him further, "...seeing you so confused and stiff, i'm starting to think you don't even want it."
"what? no! i- i do, really. you just- have me in a rather uncomfortable place."
flashing him a smile, you cup his face with your palms and bring his face close to yours. "kiss me."
"uh-"
"seonghwa."
"yes."
"kiss. me." your face morphs from the fun expression to a serious and lustful one. "now."
and like the good boy he is, he obeys. he leans in, lips softly pressing into yours. he is still stiff in your hands, and his lips are almost trembling. as much as you think it is cute, it is starting to drive you crazy. why can't he just rip your panties off and plunge his fingers inside you right there underwater?
switching the places of the impatient one, you pull him off the floatie and into the water, hands wrapping around his neck and lips desperately chasing his. he tastes like a fruit salad, which you watched him steal from yunho before they joined you in sun bathing. the fusion of watermelon, kiwi and pineapples is melting on your tongue, and you just can't help but feel up his body and grind yourself on him like an animal in heat. he isn't too different from you, hands reaching for anything he can grab; from your waist, to your neck and face. you notice that he isn't touching any areas that you really need to be touched.
you groan, pulling away from him.
"seonghwa, you're pissing me off."
"what? why?" he pulls away, but still rests his hands on your waist, afraid that you're going to run away from him if he lets go.
"it feels like i'm forcing you to do this. you don't seem to enjoy it, at all. not the way you're supposed to. if you want me to stop, you have to tell me that. you're giving me mixed signals here, all inviting and teasing from afar, and when i finally approach you, you're so stiff and nervous. like you're waiting for me to get over with it and leave."
the young man stays silent. that isn't the case. you have no idea how it is not that case at all. seonghwa is crazy about you, from your personality, to your body. you're a full package, but you are older, more experienced. and him? he's just a young man who doesn't know a thing about pleasing a woman, other than rubbing her until eventually she cums, whether it is a minute or thirty minutes later. fun, right?
"look, here's the deal. i will leave you alone, okay?" you reach to remove his long bangs out of his face, revealing his pretty eyes staring at you with mixed emotions. "if you decide to prove me wrong, don't do it with words. come search for me, show me what you want and how you want it, and we'll go from there. sounds good?"
"but i really want you, i just-"
"no more words i said, hwa. words are nothing at this point. you want me? you're gonna have to do something about it. before somebody else does. and i really need some relief these days, i might really cave into wooyoung."
god, not wooyoung. he can't lose you to wooyoung. not because he dislikes him or something, but because he dislikes the idea of seeing you with someone else. at least seeing you, well, relieved with someone else. he's not sure what view he has on you. it is clear you only want something physical, and something limited. something tied to this vacation spot and time. does he have the heart for that? he will fall for you, he knows it. if he hasn't already.
were your eyes always this pretty in the sun? was your hair always that satisfying to touch? and was your voice always this satisfying to his ears?
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days pass fast when you're having fun. you're sadly looking over at the last packed bikini, bottom lip sticking out in a pout.
"oh, cheer up! your birthday is in like two hours!"
"oh, my bad. yay! i'm getting older!" you grab the bottled cocktail off the nightstand, sipping it.
"what has gotten up your asshole these days?" your friend is persistent.
"nothing, why would you think that?"
you hear a scoff, and you just have to roll your eyes. she stays silent for a few moments, looking at you through the mirror while she is getting ready for your birthday party. you had agreed on going for a group night swim after the countdown, but you are not feeling it. you always get sad on trips, knowing that they'll end soon and that you'll have to go back to your ordinary life. if only you could live here. with seonghwa.
what?
think straight. you cannot want something like that with him. he is so young, he should find someone his age. someone who doesn't make him sad, confused and stiff all the time. the opposite of you. it hurts your heart a little, but you remind yourself that this is only a crush that will fade, a summer fling that will pass. nothing to get yourself worked up for.
"you're so fucking depressed today, jesus. it's making me feel like shit too."
"i'm just a little homesick, that's all."
"lies. but okay, suit yourself."
you finally slip on the pink sequin dress you have bought specifically for this night. the faux feathers are tickling your skin, and you just can't wait to take it off. why are the prettiest things the most uncomfortable ones?
"wow, those heels make your legs look so hot! you're so bringing a guy here tonight."
with a glance at your pink glitter heels, you sigh. you want one guy. and it doesn't even have to be for the reason she thinks. you could just lay there, talk about old times and new times. with each second passing, it is becoming more difficult to keep your thoughts away from seonghwa. why is he so damn addicting?
"right, let's go."
the club is loud and busy, you have trouble finding the group. but when you do, you are glad. you are starting to feel more comfortable with them, and not being around them makes you feel a bit empty and bored. seeing them occupy the couch again puts a smile on your face, but when you notice one face missing, your face drops.
"where's seonghwa?" you ask before thinking.
"he left to get a drink, i think. strange, it's been fifteen minutes now. the bar isn't that busy."
glancing at the bar, you realize that san is telling the truth. the bar is almost empty, and seonghwa is nowhere to be seen. wooyoung takes his chance, expanding his hand for you to take. when you do, he gently pulls you so that you fall into his lap, and you can't help but laugh.
"rude."
"come on, is there a better seat here?"
you notice mingi taking secret glances at you friend, probably thinking whether or not he should make a similar move on her.
"so, want to play a classic?" yunho offers.
"games? come on, yunnie, we came to drink!"
yunho rolls his eyes at your friend, and brings the bottle of vodka to his lips. it is almost empty, and he downs it with no problem. he sets it in the middle of the table, giving it a spin. "who says there won't be drinking?"
wooyoung's hands are suddenly loose around you, and before you can look at him and ask what's wrong, a familiar figure joins the table. he looks absolutely ravishing.
his hair is a wavy mess, his linen white shirt half unbuttoned, and pants loosely hanging on his hips, exposing his v-line. fuck, you need him. you need him so bad that you almost start grinding on wooyoung for any friction.
"what are we doing?"
"playing some old truth or dare. spin?"
"sure."
he sits next to yunho, and spins the bottle. the bottom lands on san, the tip on your friend. he smirks, and you see that he is fighting the urge to look at mingi.
"truth or-"
"dare."
"ah, should've known already.  i dare you to sit on mingi's lap."
mingi blushes furiously, glaring at san. your friend only rolls her eyes, much like yunho at her, and sits on mingi. "childish ass dare. do better, i'm already bored."
"oh, we're just getting started."
the game lasts half an hour, and so far, you have: kissed yeosang's cheek, because everyone likes to see him shy, drank five consecutive shots of tequila, told them some of your kinks, and accidentally rubbed your ass on wooyoung's crotch. he snickers, hands coming to your hips to keep you steady. you are feeling tipsy, but you still know what you're doing. right now, the tip of the bottle is pointing at you, while jongho is taking his sweet time thinking of a dare to give you.
"oh, oh! i got one for you!" hongjoong exclaims.
the older man whispers something into the younger one's ear, and the smirk that appears on his face makes you a little nervous.
"well?" you ask, voice a bit shaky with a nervous smile.
"i dare you to..."
why did you choose dare? why couldn't it be truth? you wanted to be fun. there you have it.
"spit it out, jongho. she's shaking." wooyoung says, annoyed.
"i dare you to drink that cocktail and kiss seonghwa with it. you know, make him drink it from your mouth."
time seems to stop for you. your eyes widen, scanning over the group. you are ready to spill out excuses and explanations, but when you see them cheer, your eyebrows scrunch. nobody is seeing anything suspicious about this? well, nobody except three people. you glance at seonghwa, who is frozen in his seat. his whiskey glass rests in his hand halfway up to his mouth. 
he sets it back on the table, mentally preparing himself for what is about to happen. you will probably decline, say you see him as a childhood friend, and pick someone else to do it with instead. but when he sees you down the glass of piña colada and get up from your seat, he feels sweat wash over his body. you'll really do it. in front of his sister. in front of wooyoung. in front of everyone.
he thinks you look cute with your lips unintentionally pouting as you hold the liquid in your mouth. a fond smile creeps on his lips just before you sit on his lap, hands wrapping around his neck and lips finally pressing into his. he takes every single drop you give him, drinking it up along with the taste of your lips and tongue. already swaying a bit from alcohol, he forgets where he is for a moment. his tongue swipes your bottom lip, collecting the remains of the drinks and biting it along the way. you give in, tongue pushing past his lips and finding his.
"woah, woah! okay!"
"guys, that's enough."
but you don't stop. not when his hands are finally touching you how you want it. how you need it. his slender fingers find their spot in the back of your head, gently pulling your hair as he desperately kisses you. you whine in his mouth, pleasant pain spreading in your body. his other hand lands on your waist, pulling you closer into him so that you can only feel his scent and his warmth. only him in a room full of people. 
"shit, live porn. how about that?" wooyoung snickers, downing another tequila.
"alright, guys!"
seonghwa is the first one to pull away, hazy eyes staring deep into yours. it only takes one look from you to show him that you know what he wants, and that you want it too.
"damn. my brother and my best friend making out. didn't think i'd see that in... well, ever."
"why are you complaining? you're making out with your brother's best friend."
"yeah, but seonghwa doesn't mind, do you?"
seonghwa hates that he has to remove his gaze from you to look at his sister. "why? you mind me kissing your best friend?"
"no, no. not at all. carry on. SOMEWHERE ELSE! disgusting."
seonghwa helps you stand, not letting go of your waist.
"i'll be borrowing this." you reach for the bottle of champagne that was meant to be opened on your birthday countdown. but you found a better use of it. "see you!"
you rush out of the club, pulling seonghwa by his wrist all the way to the shore. you push him into the ocean, cold water caressing your bodies as you keep walking deeper until it reaches your chest. seonghwa is quick to continue the makeout session he has started, and you don't complain. his lips are starved of your touch, kissing you like it's his first and last.
"wait, wait."
"what?"
you give him the bottle, offering a sip. he takes a long one, not once breaking eye contact with you. when he hands it back to you, you can't help the mischievous grin that appears on your face. he looks at you with amused eyes. you pour the champagne on your neck and chest in a slow stream, not caring about pollution or wasting at this point. seonghwa takes the signal, and grabs your waist so that he can pull you closer. his tongue licks up the champagne from your neck, chest and collarbones. you are a moaning mess in his hands.
"if i would've known that all you needed was a few shots and a high schooler game, i would've done it the first day." you admit.
the wet dress sticks to your body, making it difficult to move in the water. you gasp when you feel his fingers dip between your thighs, resting on the pink bikini you've put on. with a silent approval from you, he moves the bottoms under your dress aside, middle finger slipping past your folds and thumb circling your clit. you shake under his touch, feelings too overwhelming.
"let me make love to you."
he says it so romantically, as if he isn't knuckles deep inside of you right now.
"let me show you a different way. my way."
and you give yourself to him. dragging him back to the shore, lips not once leaving his. not caring if anyone around you is watching. your dress comes off with a few difficulties, but now that you're out of it, you feel like you can breathe freely. your bikini top soon joins the dress in the sand next to you, but the chain, heels and panties stay. seonghwa spills more champagne over your exposed chest, and proceeds to lick it all up like a starved man.
"should i take off my-"
"no, please. i want to fuck you with your heels on."
"oh? that a fetish of yours?"
he blushes a little, looking down at the sparkly heels shining in the distant club lights.
"i like glitter." he simply says.
his fingers are in a rush to take your panties off, but before he can discard them along with the rest of his and your clothes, you speak. "a little warning."
"yes?"
"i can be loud."
"how loud?"
"very."
the young man looks around for a moment, as if thinking about something important. then, he simply shrugs. "okay."
before you can react, he shoves the panties in your mouth, catching you by surprise. he strokes himself a few times, too impatient for any foreplay. there was enough teasing all these days, he knows you can't take it either.
his warm cock slides between your folds with ease, your walls hugging it tightly. he groans, and you moan around the panties. his hands grip your waist, but not the rough grip. the strong, yet gentle grip. he moves his hips sensually, like waves rather than thrusts. he raises your hips a little, angling them so that he can reach better. your eyebrows scrunch with pleasure, eyes looking up at him as a plea for more.
"i know, i know. feels good, doesn't it?"
you nod, rolling your hips to match his rhythm. sand sticks to your skin, the smell of his perfume and champagne is making you feel dizzy, and the grip on your hips is only getting stronger. you haven't felt such pleasure in a long time.
the tip of his cock rubs the sensitive spot inside of you, making you whine and moan through the wet fabric.
"oh, you were just made for me, weren't you? look how good you're taking me. all of it."
your eyes roll at his dirty talk, and you promise yourself there that this won't be the last time you're hearing it.
"fuuuck..." he trails, plunging his hips into yours and touching your cervix along the way. he continues the hard but slow pumps, getting lost in the warm feeling of you. "fuck, you're so pretty for me. look at you, you fit in my hands like a perfect doll."
is that size kink coming from him? if yes, you are having so much fun finding out about him in a situation like this.
you whimper, feeling your orgasm approaching. he doesn't notice, instead, he is so lost in his own pleasure that he barely feels you clawing at his back as you cum hard on his cock.
"huh? what's that? you want more?"
tears drop down your cheeks, overwhelming pleasure washing over your body. you can't take it, but seonghwa doesn't ask. he only holds you in place, slowing his pace and giving you time to relax and regain composure.
but what's the use, when as soon as you calm from your high, he starts snapping his hips into yours again? you now shamelessly tug at his hair, not sure if it's from pain or pleasure. but both is good to you.
"fuck, can i cum in you?"
you nod, and if you could, you'd beg him to do so. seonghwa gets down, burying his face into the crook of your neck and shoulder, his fingers finding your clit and rubbing it in circles. you desperately groan into his ear, moving your hips with his movements. seonghwa's moves gradually become sloppy, losing the collected sensual waves and instead opting for harsh thrusts, tip of his cock touching your cervix and leaving your body shaking in his arms.
fireworks paint the sky, just like seonghwa paints your walls with his seed. your orgasm washes over you once again, and you feel yourself get slippery down there. he doesn't stop, helping both of you ride it out as fireworks keep going off above you.
seonghwa is the first to gain his consciousness, carefully removing the panties from your mouth. while you are still catching your breath, he kisses your tears away.
"hey?"
you hum, looking up at the colorful explosions.
"did i hurt you?"
"in normal circumstances, i would've said i wish. but this? you just made me never wish for rough sex again."
he only chuckles, then takes his discarded shirt from the small pile. he helps you sit up, then covers you with his shirt.
"thank you, hwa."
he puts his pants back on, sitting next to you. he grabs the bottle of leftover champagne, taking a sip before offering you one too. you take it, resting your head on his shoulder.
"happy birthday, noona."
"oh, you seriously have to stop that."
as you both laugh and stare at the reflection of the moon on the ocean surface, you can't help but feed the small hope you almost killed today. maybe seonghwa doesn't have to be a faded crush or a summer fling.
"say, when we get back, do you want to go out someti-" he starts, as if he read your thoughts.
"yes." you interrupt, planting a kiss on his cheek.
🐬feedback greatly appreciated! 💙
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rafesangelita · 8 months ago
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hii again ik i just sent one but what about rafey manhandling you out of a party when you get into an argument w some girl who was like trying to get all over him (he was clearly not into it and was telling her he had a girl) and then him eating her pussy in bed that night saying that shes the only one he wants cause he loves her and her pretty pussy so much -👛
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warnings: arguing, oral (f receiving)
you were sitting next to rafe when the broad stumbled over to him, so high out of her mind that she didn’t notice your head resting on his shoulder. “hey rafeee!” your eyes shot to the source of the voice, your boyfriend immediately glancing over at you. “you got a line for me?” she smiled, tripping over her heels before falling right into his lap. “yo, come on!” he pushed her, “watch the fuck out, i got all this shit out right here.” you glared at her, annoyed with the way she was looking at your boyfriend.
“i don’t have any money on me, but i could pay you with something else..” rafe’s lip curled in disgust, physically cringing at her while you fought the urge to drag her out of the house by her hair. “go be a mess somewhere else, i got a girl.” rafe pulled you closer to his side, her eyes finally landing you. “all lines are fifty dollars, babe. sorry, no free plays around here!” you flashed her a smile, running your hand across rafe’s chest, “this is your girl? my god, i’d think you have higher standards, ray.. guess not.” you took a moment to examine her.
“then what does that make you?” you stood up. “the whole world could see where your hair extensions start, your lashes are hanging on by a thread, you desperately need a nail fill, and you could barely walk in those things called heels.. you’re as low as they come.” rafe was already packing his stuff, knowing how this would end if you two didn’t leave right now. surrounding partygoers were now looking at you two, your boyfriend tugging on one of the belt loops of your skirt. “my daddy is chief police, i’d watch out if i were you. i could shut your whole operation down.” at that, rafe cursed under his breath, dragging you away before anything could escalate.
“do it then! and make sure you tell him how you’re an easy coke whore while you’re at it!” rafe picked you up, throwing you over his shoulder while you tried to squirm out of his grip. “put me down!” it wasn’t until he made it to the truck that he placed you in the passenger seat, your hands shoving him away when he tried to talk to you. he groaned, making his way to the driver’s side. “you should’ve defended me.” rafe looked over at you with wide eyes. “i should’ve defended you? against what? the idiot that couldn’t tell left from right?” he laughed.
“it’s not funny.” you crossed your arms over your chest, scooting as close to the door as you could. “are you seriously mad at me right now?” you swatted his hand away when he reached over, making him shake his head. “just wait till we get home.” you rolled your eyes, ignoring him for the rest of the ride. you were quick to get off the truck once he pulled in, slamming the door shut as you ran inside. rafe scoffed, “well that was a little dramatic.” he went up upstairs, groaning in frustration when the door knob to his bedroom didn’t budge. “you can’t lock me out of my own space!” you were naked, about to step into the shower before you shouted, “i just did!”
you took your time under the hot water, washing off all of the irritation and anger from tonight. you knew rafe did everything he could to establish himself as unavailable and uninterested to that girl, he even pushed her for crying out loud. the guilt for being mad at him was starting to seep through, making you open the bedroom door after you got out of the shower. once you changed into a pair of his boxers and a baby tee, you climbed underneath the sheets, waiting to hear his footsteps walk in. eventually he did, sitting at the edge of the bed.
“i’m sorry,” you apologized, “i just get so mad when someone thinks they can just flirt their way into getting your attention.” he turned, rubbing your leg through the comforter. “no one, except you, has my attention, y/n. nothing else matters to me.” he uncovered you, fingers toying with the waistband of your, well his, bottoms. you sighed, pulling him to your chest where you cradled his head. “i promise i won’t be mad at you when it comes to other girls. i trust you.” he kissed you before pulling away, sliding his boxers down your legs.
you let him have his way with you, a gasp leaving your lips when he pulled your thighs on top of his shoulders. “you never have to worry about anyone else, no one even compares.” rafe left wet kisses on your folds, your back arching off the bed when his tongue met your clit. “i’ve never met someone so beautiful, ‘never seen a pussy this pretty.” he spread you apart with his thumbs, marveling at the sight of you. “you’re the only girl i need, ‘the only one for me.” you knew rafe had a mean head game, but one hour later and he was still making you cum until tears rolled down your cheeks. “please! it’s too much, rafe,” you sobbed, your body on fire as your legs trembled.
he finally pulled away, his lips shining with your slick. “i love you.” he rubbed circles into your skin. rafe waited until you were able to meet his eyes, your chest falling and rising with each breath. “i love you, too.” you blinked slowly.
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aajjks · 1 year ago
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please please PLEASE! (m)
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synopsis. He’s a determined man, and he knows a magical word, please.
warnings. ännöyïng köö, hë häs göt thë fättëst crüsh ön yöu, përsuätïön, bêggïng, tsündërë yn, evïl bräïnêd köö, cütê köö, mänïpülätïön, cöcky köö.
He is kinda cringe but yk yolo.
note. HEYYYY I already miss him so.. I wrote this in like 37 minutes.. kinda rough kind of cringe but you know… and based on the interactions and reactions, this will get this may become a little Drabble series. OK OK NOW ENJOY. AND PLEASE SEND ME SOME FEEDBACK OR ASKS THEY MAKE ME REALLY HAPPY.
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“PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE YN!”
When are you ever going to agree?
Do you know that he cannot sleep because of you? Do you know that he’s not even able to eat without feeling sick to his stomach, ALL BECAUSE OF YOU.
You are very evil. Jungkook thinks that you are very mean, insensitive! You are evily beautiful, frustratingly sexy and awfully perfect.
He HATES you.
“You evil woman! I hate you!” He’s crying, he’s devastatingly frustrated right now. He has been persuading you for a month. But you still haven’t agreed.
He looks up at you, you look bored. He’s on his knees, his hands resting on your thighs, he’s got tears in his eyes, “JUST ONE DATE!” He chokes out.
He’s looking at you constantly, but it doesn’t have an effect on you, you’re looking at your nails while he’s begging you. “I said no.” You shrug, he scoffs. What is your problem? He’s hot. He earns well. AND HE LIKES YOU A LOT.
So why won’t you give him a chance?
“JUST ONE DATEEE PLEASE.” he sounds really cringe and desperate. He’s a grown man. But he’s on his knees, begging you. “Ynnnnnnn!” Are you enjoying this? he’s sure.
He doesn’t mind entertaining you, but… he really wants you.
“Yn!” He whines, he’s even tired of crying and screaming. His throat feels dry now. He stares at you dumbfounded. You are one stubborn woman.
But he’s also very stubborn, and he knows you very well, your reason to not go on a date with him our date is very ridiculous in his opinion..
He rolls his eyes. You are about to say it.
“No kook. You’re my best friend.”
Of course he’s your best friend, that is the problem.
“BUT I LIKE YOU.” He argues back, biting his lower lip, he doesn’t know how to get you to agree. Even though he knows you very well… he’s not sure.
But one thing is for sure, he won’t stop annoying you until you agree.
You don’t reply, still looking at your manicured nails. They take his attention as well, distracting him. They are a pretty color of brown, with a gray sparkly French tip.
He loves your hands so much.
“FINE.” Jungkook pouts. “because of you, I’m gonna die alone.” of course guilt tripping has to work. You’ll have to agree now.
He has been your best friend for the longest time ever, and he knows that you cannot see him sad. He’s liked you for as long as he can remember.
And you know that very well.
“Yn… you make me very sad.” He turns his eyes away from you. And he feels your gaze shifting to his face. He can feel the heat of your gaze suddenly.
He smirks.
He feels kind of evil, but he’s gotta do what he’s gotta do.
“Y-You know I’ve liked you for the longest time! A-AND IT CAN BE KIND OF WEIRD TO DATE YOUR BEST FRIEND, BUT… just one chance.” He speaks in a very low sad tone.
Crossing his hands across his chest. And then he hears you sigh. “You are a very evil man, kook.” His ears perk up, you are definitely about to agree.
His hard work is finally starting to pay off. Maybe begging you for the last couple of weeks… was worth it after all. He’s got a goofy smile on his face, you can’t see it because he’s turned his face away from you.
“Ugh… don’t give me the silent treatment… I can hear your pout.” he is sure you’re rolling your eyes right now. The thing is that you both know each other very very well.
That’s why you are perfect for each other.
Go on… go on go on!!!
“Okay fine. UGH DON’T MAKE ME REGRET IT.” You say, finally giving in.
And at the speed of light, he turns his head, almost breaking his neck. Jungkook is looking at you with wide eyes. His mouth is agape.
Did he hear you right?
“SAY THAT AGAIN!” Standing up, he giggles. Clapping his hands like a toddler. He knows he’s annoying the fuck out of you right now, but a man’s got to celebrate.
“OH MY GOD YN Thank you I promise you won’t regret it and you will want to date me every single lifetime of yours.” He smirks, his changing from desperate to cocky in 00.0 seconds.
He winks at you while you give him the middle finger.
“You are going to want me so bad after this. I WON.” He Throws his hand into the air, doing a dramatic pose.
“Now I’ve gotta go!!! GO TO PREPARE FOR THE DATE. It has to be perfect. Bye bye ynnnnnn!!!! I love you.” He blows you a flying kiss before yeeting out of your home.
You just hope you won’t regret this.
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mjolnirswriststrap · 3 months ago
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Dark!Rafe Cameron x Plus size!Reader
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Word Count: 2,223
Summary: You go on vacation to work on yourself, but what if there’s a guy on the beach who just won’t let you.
Warnings: No specific warnings for this chapter. SERIES WARNINGS-> 18+‼️, dark noncon themes, rich boy Rafe doesn’t take no for an answer, infidelity, reader cheats on fiancé in future chapters, SMUT.
Masterlist
Some things never change; the sand, the water, the moon rising over the horizon. You hadn’t stepped foot in North Carolina in almost 12 years, but you counted on one thing; the beach was the same. When your family moved back home, you cried for weeks, you knew the island was where you belonged. But years passed, and you didn’t see your extended family you left behind in North Carolina, and the yearning for home became too much. So here you were, on a vacation all alone.
You left your fiancé and family back home, you wanted them to come, but they all had plans. Your fiancé couldn’t call off work in time to heed your cravings for salt water. Assuring him that you’d be okay alone, you ran as fast as the wind could take you, for as long as your bank account could handle. You needed this escape from reality, life was becoming too real, too fast; you just wanted to feel like you were floating for another week or two.
You knew what waited on you when you got back home, your fiancé, buying a house, being terrified of getting pregnant every time you have sex. You weren’t ready for children, you wanted marriage, and to spend your life with someone, but things are moving too fast and you can’t even decide if that’s what you still want with him. You got together when you were fresh out of high school, getting engaged at 20, now you’re 23 and you just don’t feel the same that you used to.
You needed space most of all, space from your fiancé. He wasn’t suffocating you or anything, it was the opposite. He was good, too good for you. He tried his best, and it wasn’t enough for you, you hated to admit it; you felt an overwhelming guilt because of it.
Your fiancé held an innocence that was ripped from you when you were a child. He gave you his all, every second of the day. You cursed yourself for complaining that there’s no romance. You don’t dare speak a word to anyone on how unfulfilled you feel, like there’s more out there waiting on you. You live with a growing guilt, one that the devil on your shoulder tells you; you shouldn’t feel at all.
You were falling out of love with him, rapidly. Not wanting to be the villain, you knew this trip might fix you; you hoped it would. That’s why you sat in the sand with your suitcase beside you. Jean shorts and tennis shoes already covered in the tan substance. It was late when you got here, you missed check in at your hotel, so you asked your Uber to drop you off at the beach close to your aunts house, you’d walk there after you had some time alone.
The sun was setting behind you on the sound, the empty beach was a stark contrast to what it had been when you were a kid. Then you heard them, a group of younger guys laughing and carrying on as they walk down the beach. You try to ignore their conversation, focusing on the sand you have your fingers dug into. You look out into the water, watching the gentle waves come in, your eyes don’t even register the three boys walk past your eye line, instantly refocusing on the dark blue mass.
You cringe as sand suddenly flies in your direction. A body landing not too far from where you’re sitting. Another body lands on top of him and starts putting him in an arm bar. “Woah.” You say hopping up, grabbing your suitcase in an attempt to move away from the situation. You might not have given them a second glance but you knew it was the group that just blocked your vision, loudly taking up their own space on the beach.
“Watch out,” The third guy yells at his friends, he looks over at you and you can’t help but notice the way your heart starts beating faster, like you were being studied under his gaze. “There was a pretty lady sitting there.”. He says it smugly, but there’s no hint of a smirk on his face. It’s deadpanned, devoid of emotion, like he’s too focused on watching you.
The two guys obviously play wrestling break apart. “Don’t make me kick your ass again.” The dark haired one says to the blond; but the blond just laughs maniacally. Deciding now would be the perfect time to head back to your aunt’s house; you start pulling your suitcase away. You didn’t wanna get caught in the crossfire of some drunk frat guys.
“You need some help?” The tall, non-wrestling blond asks. You turn around to see if he’s addressing you, only to find that same dark stare, studying you, as if he hasn’t looked away once. “I’m fine.” You rush the words out, not knowing what to say even if you did need help.
His face finally cracks, forcing a fake smile to his lips, you can tell he didn’t like the instant rejection. “You sure?” He bites back, “That suitcase looks awfully heavy.”.
You can tell this guys no good, just by the way he talks, as if you’d give in to his persuasion. You can’t lie to yourself, of course you thought he was cute. A tall lean body with ocean blue eyes and blond hair, he was a model for a surf magazine. You can’t be thinking like this, he was everything your fiancé wasn’t, and you shouldn’t be wanting his help. “Thanks, but I got it.”. You nod slowly as you say the words, trying to reassure him.
The forced smile drops from his face and he takes one last look from your feet to your eyes, raking in every detail you have to offer. He drops his chin in, only what you could call acknowledgment; before walking back to his friends that were busy dusting themselves off.
Not wanting to wait around for another awkward interaction you skip steps as you hoof it to your aunts. This was the first night of your trip and what were you doing instead of working on yourself? Letting a guy ogle you, simply because he was cute. He could’ve been anyone, a trust fund baby from New York or a firefighter on a night out with his friends. He could be the sweetest guy in the world or the devil; you don’t know yet you still gave him your time, more than enough if it.
Your thoughts are cut short when you hear quick footsteps behind you. Then a hand on your arm. Before alarm bells could ring or you could scream, that familiar voice from before speaks, making you look into the blue eyes of the once thought assailant. “You didn’t really think I’d let you walk home carrying this, alone, did you?” He asks, with a deep serious crease in his brow.
Your mouth hangs open, searching for something to say. But you’re too stunned by his actions, meekly letting go of the handle of the suitcase when he snatches it from your grasp. You would think he was being chivalrous, if he hadn’t been so rough taking it from you. “Thank you.” You mutter, walking in step with him towards your aunt’s. You couldn’t place his slight agitation. Was it really because you didn’t want him carrying your suitcase? You barely knew him, what did he expect?
You can only figure one thing, most women agree with everything he says. Most women probably would’ve been more than glad to accept his offer of help. You could see yourself appreciating it too; if you were more secure in yourself and your engagement. To be honest with yourself, you didn’t know his intentions, maybe he really is a gentleman. But you can’t trust yourself, his intimidating aura and even sharper eyes are everything you were afraid of.
You decide to not spark up a conversation, knowing it will only dig you further into a hole. One that’s bottom will collapse open and you’ll free fall to the center of the earth. He notices the distant look in your eye, how you kept a few feet away from him as you walked down the skinny pathway. “What’s your name?” He asks, and there was that agitated tone again. “*you* didn’t give me the chance to ask.” He says it like an accusation, how dare you not give him more of your time.
You can feel a swirling feeling in your gut, one of defensiveness, and then one telling you to submit, do not bite back. Since you don’t know his intentions, you decide to be the bigger person, plastering a small smile on your face. “Y/N, and you?” You mistakenly look over at him, and he’s silently mouthing your name, testing it on his tongue. He feels your gaze and breaks out of his trance. “Rafe, Rafe Cameron.” He says.
You just hum and nod your head. The way he said it, was like his name was meant to mean something; but it didn’t. His eyes looked like they were expecting some kind of reaction out of you, and when he didn’t get one you saw a slight sneer appear. When you take a sharp right turn he stands there for a second, watching you walk ahead, his brain is about to short circuit, why are you being like this? You should be hanging off of him already.
He catches up to you before you notice, his steps matching yours. “What do you have planned for your trip?” He says, changing his tone. He’s trying to play nice, see if you’d open up for him. That has you looking over at him, and even the look on his face has changed, slight wrinkles under his eyes, and a smile that would make anyone drop to the floor.
You steady your mind, looking back at the sidewalk in front of you. “Just visiting family, learning to relax.” You say honestly, you didn’t need to tell him you were here to work yourself, but you didn’t see a point in lying.
“That’s nice.” He says, but it lacked enthusiasm. Nodding your head you can’t help yourself but to ask him. “You from around here?”, there it was, the bite. The proverbial shovel was already scooping dirt out of the hole. Rafe relaxes as you carry on the conversation, not feeling like he’s talking to a brick wall anymore. “Yeah, I live on the other side of the island.” He smirks.
Oh, so he was some rich boy. “That’s nice.” You say, looking around noticing the houses get more impoverished as you walk towards your aunt’s street. He scoffs, “I guess,” and pauses and watches your hair fan over your back as you walk. “By chance are you single?” He finally asks.
That has you bristling, of course he had to ask. Somethings telling you to say yes, he wouldn’t know if you were lying, you took off your engament ring, telling your fiancé you’d lose it in the ocean. But you knew you couldn’t, the universe was crafting a punishment for you, and lying would only make it worse. “I’m engaged, actually.” You say it almost as if you’re apologizing, for the inconvenience.
You can see him visibly react, the smile falling from his lips. “I figured you wouldn’t be.” He says dejected. You knew he’d ask, and you knew you’d have to tell the truth. You never thought of what happened after, you just expected him to accept it, understand that this couldn’t go any further than a friendly gesture.
You didn’t expect him to say what he says next. “That kinda thing doesn’t bother me much.”. It has you stopping in your tracks, your aunt’s house in view. You turn to him with a puzzled look, “What?” You blink, trying to reassure yourself that is just what he said. “I said, a ring hasn’t stopped me before.” He says it with a confidence that makes you cringe internally. You could see the look in his eyes, like a snake ready to strike. You hated snakes.
“I-“ You stutter, trying to find the right words. You couldn’t even chastise him for what he said, knowing that he would only continue bantering with you, drawing you in deeper. “I have to go.” You say, grabbing your suitcase from his hands, you could feel him hold onto it, as if he’s deciding whether or not to just let you go. But as he studies your hard pressed face and nervous reaction, he feels pity for you. And he likes you too much to make you suffer, he knows he’ll see you tomorrow; he’ll make sure of it.
So he releases the handle to your grip, raising his hands up in mock defense. “Alright, alright, I get it.” He says in a cool tone. But that smirk is back on his face, “I’ll see you around.” He says taking a step backwards, but he keeps facing you, waiting for your response. You shrug, turning to put your back to him. “It’s a big island, don’t hold your breath.”. He watches you walk away with a stunned look on his face, his mouth slightly hung open.
He knew what he was doing this summer, breaking you.
•••••••••••••••
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blood-smiles · 4 months ago
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𝐘𝐀𝐍𝐃𝐄𝐑𝐄!𝐂𝐋𝐎𝐖𝐍 𝐗 𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐃𝐄𝐑 𐙚 ⋆˚。⋆
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𝐘𝐀𝐍𝐃𝐄𝐑𝐄!𝐂𝐋𝐎𝐖𝐍 𝐗 𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐃𝐄𝐑 TW ~ MDNI . clown is a creep . reader is a loser and has no idea how to flirt . implied stalking
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╰┈➤ How did you even get here? Is what you thought to yourself as your fists locked around a fistful of colorful hair, milk white eyes glossy with tears looking up at you with nothing but devotion behind them, strong arms locked around your legs, plush chest pressed against your knees, so please explain, how did things escalate to this degree?
Your best friend was sick and couldn’t take their sibling to a party, and they basically begged you to take their little sibling (s/n), 
your best friend was starting to look pathetic, so eventually you caved and gave into their pleads, they basically guilt tripped you into the whole thing,
You grabbed (s/n) by their hand, making sure to keep them close to you, the more you observed them the more they seemed like the human reincarnation of a hyperactive squirrel, barely being able to contain their excitement, zipping from one place to the other,
“(Y/n)!! Come oooon! We need to goooo!” The high pitched voice of (s/n) whined to you, pulling on your hand with their whole body weight,
“Okay, Okay, let’s go..” you answered their demands, moving your feet from the place you prostrated yourself,
After a brief walk you and (s/n) arrived at a huge house, you know someone has big money if their house has their own gate, 
You walked up to the gates, your eyes briefly looking at the obsidian like tint of the metal gates, 
There seemed to be a doorbell beside the gate with a small speaker, a camera placed just above it, you pressed the doorbell, a loud buzzing reverberated from the device, a red blinking light emitted from the camera,
(s/n) ran up to the speaker, and then proceeded to yell into the speaker at the top of their lungs,
“HI! MY NAME IS (S/N) AND THAT LADY IS (Y/N!! WE CAME FOR THE PARTY!!” the small child grabbed the sides of the machine, shoving their chubby face into the lenses,
Suddenly the gates started shifting, creating a noise alike to the sound of nails scraping a chalkboard, absolutely dreadful.
You cringed at the uncomfortable sound of the gates, someone really needed to check that out soon..
(s/n) pulled you along, running into the grand house with you behind, it was easy to locate where the so called party was,
As a huge bouncy house was situated right in the middle of the estate, bright red, yellow and green stood out, 
Many rows of tables decorated in the same colors of the bouncy house aligned neatly side by side,
And that was just the dining area, there was a huge pile of gifts of all shapes, sizes and colors placed on top of a table,
You looked down at your own gift as you placed it on the table, grimacing slightly at your lack of creativity, you basically just put the gift inside a cute bag and put decorative tissue inside and called it a day, 
“(Y/n) can I go play? Please please pleeeeaase!!” The child next to you pleaded with you, pulling on your shirt repeatedly to ensure your attention wan on them,
How did (bf/n) deal with this little shit? You were moments away from kicking this little prick to infinity and beyond, your patience truly is beyond this world..
“Fine— go play or something, but don’t go too far away, Kay? Only where I can see you, or else your older sibling will have my head..” you ruffled the small child’s hair and waved them goodbye, but when you lifted your hand they were already far gone,
You sighed, looking around if there was something to eat besides over saturated candy with way too much sugar,
Soon your gaze landed on  something entirely else, not water or any normal food— but a clown,  it was totally expected they would have an entertainer here, but this.. type of clown?
That was no clown, that must be fucking moto moto or some shit, you were expecting to see a skinny middle aged man acting overly positive in a colorful attire,
Well, he was a fucking hunk of a man, even with clown makeup on and all the eye violating colors he had on, he was still a hot babe in your humble opinion,
Well shit, you fear of clowns suddenly disappeared.
Your eyes were basically glued onto this man, you were moments away from biting your fist to try and contain the ungodly cough that was about to come out of your mouth,
The costume barely being able to keep his humongous chest inside, although the buttons seemed like they were crying for help,
And his biceps.. they way they shifted with each move he made while making a balloon dog, fucking enchanting.
Your eyes darted from his colorful hair to his muscles and back and forth, 
His hair was basically a rainbow, strands of red, orange, yellow, green, blue, purple and pink decorated his hair, and it seemed it wasn’t a wig either, that’s some real devotion to your job, dying your hair for a clown job is crazy devoted.
You stared at the clown for a little longer, noticing strange markings on his skin… Were those tattoos? And crudely covered up ones at those.. urgh.. the paint he was using to cover them up was doing nothing..
The tall clown noticed your stare, turning around and smiling unsettlingly at you, bringing his gloved hand up to wave at you.
.. was that a golden tooth? You asked yourself as you waved back awkwardly, a nervous smile on your face,
Is this a gangster clown or some shit?
They really were hiring anyone now huh..? Okay, but you would still hit,
Would it honk though?
The clown from earlier was still eyeing you, he wouldn’t admit it, but his eyes were glued onto you like you were the only thing in the world,
God, how can someone be so perfect?
“—aw breaker! Jaw breaker!” An annoying little shit pulled on his hand, 
This little brat was the kid you came with, however it didn’t look anything like you, surely you wouldn’t miss a nuisance like it, right?
He looked down at the child, his cloudy eyes narrowing into a pointed glare under his colorful tresses, he tilted his head asking the child to speak,
“Can you-Can you make me a..a flower?” The child elaborated while toying with their hands, looking up at him with careful eyes,
The clown had to hold back a scoff, grabbing a balloon he masterfully crafted a rubber flower, the petals a soft pink and the stem a vine green,
He watched as the little abomination ran over to you, offering the balloon flower to you, his jaw clenched, his teeth grinding together, the tendons of his neck becoming strained as thick veins sprawled across his smooth skin,
He was seeing red, all he wanted to do was to grab that brat by the hair and pound it’s head into the pavement, who cares if it’s a kid? Fuck them kids.
All he wanted was you, he knew your eyes were on him constantly, scanning over his face and body, he liked it, he liked your attention being on him.
He hated that you weren’t watching him anymore, he was jealous, he knew he was.
He wants everyone here dead. Dead. Dead. Especially that little kid with you, he wants that kid six feet deep underneath.
He clenched and unclenched his hands, trying to release some frustration from his body, the veins sprawling across his arms were working overtime, hot blood surging through them, boiling under his skin.
His rage seemed to go down when he gazed at you, oh.. How sweet you looked, that little smile made you look so adorable, 
He watched as you took the balloon flower in your hands and admired it, you set it in your lap while smiling fondly,
The colorful man swore his heart stopped for a whole moment, the white makeup on his face miraculously covering up the blooming blush on his face,
He lifted his hands to cup his burning cheeks, the skin under his callous fingers feeling way too warm for comfort,
The rest of the part went on as normally as possible, the clown himself not being too much entertainment for the children, 
Many of the smaller kids complained that the entertainer didn’t even talk to them, just responding with nods or hums on special occasions,
And soon the party was over, you were dead tired and over stimulated, the bright colors, lights and the sweet scent of candy was making you go mad,
But you really needed to find a bathroom, it felt as if your bladder was going to pop if you didn’t pee now.
You asked a parent to watch over s/n while you went and did your business,
You basically sprinted over to the bathroom, making sharp twists and turns, but soon enough a familiar head of colorful hair caught your eye,
The hot clown? (You soon learned his stage name was Jaw breaker) 
You noticed him fiddling with what seemed to be a lighter, he opened and closed the small box with a satisfying click, turning the lighter in his hands masterfully, not even glancing down,
You were so focused on the lighter that you didn’t seem to notice him quietly staring at you, he tilted his head to the side, getting some of the hair covering his eyes away from his vision,
beads of sweat glistened across his skin, the once white face paint beginning to slip off his face, leaving some parts of his face completely bare, showing off the smooth skin underneath,
Now is your time, you need to flirt with the hot clown, it’s now or never, 
You shakily approached the tall man, taking out a handkerchief you stuck out your hand, the cloth lying on the center of your palm,
“Uhm. You are pretty— I mean, pretty sweaty.. Oh god that sounds wrong, uh.. Just uhm. Here, have this.” You fucked up that interaction so bad, god you want to hide in a hole and never come out again..
The clown smiled at you fondly, gently taking the handkerchief from your hand, his touch being as light as a feather, but did he really need to grab your whole hand to grab it? You weren’t complaining! Just curious and a little creeped out..
You got a glimpse of his eyes, just briefly, the pupil of his eye was a grey, while his iris was ghost white, just a shade away from blending in completely with the sclera of his eye,
His pupils were blown out, almost unnaturally, and they only seemed to get larger when making contact with your own eyes,
“..Thank you.” Wow. You were expecting a deeper voice, but his voice was unusually soft and soothing, it was just like your eardrums were caressed gently,
Then you ran away after that, your bladder was going to start to leak if you didn’t go neoww.
But the dark skinned man was left standing in awe, staring at your vanishing form longingly, 
After you were gone he squeezed the soft cloth in his hand, he wasn’t even going to try and wipe his disgusting sweat with your handkerchief, he wouldn’t dare soil it with his bodily fluids..
Little digits and letter were imprinted in what seems to be fresh ink, was this your hand writing?
‘XXX-XXX-XXXX, you’re pretty cute, text me whenever - y/n’
What a sweetheart.. you just saved him the hassle of having to infiltrate your home security! And now he had the chance to finally get a new tattoo, and he had decided it would be your name, probably on his lower back or lower stomach..
He couldn’t help but bring the cloth closer to his nose and taking a deep whiff, soon he couldn’t restrain himself any longer and ended up pressing the precious item against his face he inhaled your scent like it was oxygen, like he was a suffocating man.
And lord, that was the most eye rolling, thigh clenching experience he has ever had, the ecstasy he got from you was higher than any type of drug or booze he had tried, you were just on a different level,
A pathetic whimper was just barely muffled by the thin cloth,
Were you some type of god? Just who were you? Did you come to personally bless his pitiful boredom filled life?
Shit.. His pants were feeling awfully tight, his eyes glanced down to the colorful patterns of his pants becoming distorted under the new prominence of his little problem,
A beeping went off on his phone, he decided to shrug off what was happening in his lower regions for now, 
He had found his new object of infatuation, and he wouldn’t let go, not after you had done this to him, you have to accept the consequences of your actions! He will try to be as gentle as possible with you..
Surely you won’t mind having a new neighbor and a new regular at your workplace, would you, baby doll?
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