#there was never room for OURs
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myheartxmyman · 10 months ago
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But somewhere over the last year I lost you, the person I still love deeply. Whoever you are now is someone else. I tried to reach you, find you again, but who you are now who you became I don't even consider as a friend.
#you got lost on the way#strange things can happen#when thinking about all the things that went wrong and all the hurt you caused it makes me think I might have loved a phantom#at the end of February you had already changed a lot#people can keep up with a wrong version of themselves for approximately two to three months#is that the explanation?#and still here I am dancing with your ghost#still you're not a hundred percent gone#there is still a tiny silly hope#but with some time I'll set myself free#even if it all was true the colors you showed me in the end didn't align with mine#you're satisfied with YOUR life#there was never room for OURs#feels like I was supposed to just fit in in yours#I mean if I would have gotten pregnant what did you expect?#a pregnant girlfriend who's supposed to give birth between two flats?#wouldn't have worked out like that#at least not for me#but that's what I mean by saying 'you are completely satisfied with YOUR life#feels like we never had a true chance because we never grew together#at least not in enough ways#we never formed our own home#maybe that's why we never got our little Braten#I miss what we had#I am in deep pain and at the same time kinda relieved#it's strange on one hand I feel like all our the troubles this relationship caused all the pain of losing my man in the end makes it hard to#breath and swallow#at the other hand I can breathe in way deeper than I could those last nine/ten months#a burden is lifted#the heart aches nevertheless
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poorly-drawn-mdzs · 3 months ago
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None of our hands are clean
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#poorly drawn mdzs#mdzs#jin guangshan#mianmian#The secret meaning behind one of the jin members scuttling off is:#I couldn't make three people work out in the remaining panels and per my rule of '3 attempts and take a different approach' he had to go.#Sometimes there are meaningful reasons why something happens in the background. And sometimes it is like this.#Let's just say he saw what was about to happen and got out of there before mianmian started throwing hands.#Okay no more delay. The sheer boldness to call WWX a killer in a room full of people who wear their war body count as a badge...#It's about hypocrisy yes - but it is also about how the narrative shifts on the same action depending on the frame.#Because at the end of the day...the blood on our hands is still blood on our hands.#Both the deaths on the battlefield and the deaths of the Jin's abusing the Wen remnants are still deaths caused by another.#They are also deaths that - depending who holds the frame - are noble acts to protect others.#But it isn't supposed to be about who was right and who was wrong.#It is about the need to be seen as the victim to avoid culpability.#Because if you aren't responsible you don't have to be held accountable. You don't have to grow or change.#If someone takes all the blame then there is no need to reflect on your own faults.#We have to protect our fragile ego from the mirror lest it shatter and we have to remake it anew.#Horrifically enough...even if WWX spared the Jin guards or even never ran into Wen Qing#He wouldn't have been able to escape being the scapegoat. He downfall was set into motion a long time ago.#My goodness...What a deliciously tragic story Wei Wuxian's first life was.
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heartorbit · 6 months ago
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catch us if you can! ☆
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aspiring-wildfire · 8 days ago
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the epic score is very fun in a lot of ways and odysseus murdering all the suitors at the end is delightfully chilling and very cathartic but i gotta say thinking abt odysseus’s perspective on that whole scene really makes me laugh like. you have been away from home for 20 years fighting first the biggest war in mythohistory and then what really seems like every fucking thing that could try to kill you in the entire adriatic sea. literally all your friends are dead and you just beat the shit out of an actual god to get back to the only two people in the world who matter to you anymore. and then you finally get back to your house after 20 FUCKING YEARS and it’s trashed bc a fucking frathouse worth of nepo babies who were like ten last time you saw them moved in while you were gone, bullied your family for well over a decade, and are currently planning how they’re gonna murder your son and assault your wife. no wonder he’s fuckin pissed
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incorrectfatui · 4 months ago
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Dottore: *dies*  Signora: Timer starts now! When is he coming back? I say two months!  Crucabena: Bullshit. One month.  Pierro: Nah, half a month.  Pantalone, new to the Fatui, sobbing: WHAT ARE YOU DOING? DOTTORE JUST DIED!  Columbina, scratching chin in thought: One week.
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notbecauseofvictories · 1 month ago
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Back in the early 2000s, the Wicked OBC soundtrack came out, and I devoured it. Wicked immediately became part of my personality. I remember sitting in pre-algebra, reading and re-reading the McGuire book, listening to the soundtrack so often that even now, several decades later, I can breathe in time with the music. And then, as a birthday gift, my family took me to see the touring production. I was so excited. I was so jazzed. It was the fulfillment of every Broadway-loving Midwestern teen's dreams, to finally---finally---see the musical she has been pining for since she grabbed the soundtrack off the livejournal swap.
............shortly thereafter, I walked out of that production with my love of Wicked stone dead.
At the time, I chalked it up to the difference between imagination (no budget/labor/time constraints; physics is optional) and reality (physics exist; so does accounting). However, it's now been almost 20 years, they can do some real nifty stuff with CGI, so I can say with confidence...the version I came up with in my bedroom as a bored teen remains better.
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faaun · 6 months ago
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what draws you back to your country what draws you back to your land when i was a kid i told myself if i ever left iran i'd never go back 2 years into living in the UK i started looking at news on iran again 10 years in and i visited it for the first time again and today i heard an iranian mother talk in farsi to her child on the train to london the way my mother used to and i wanted to cry i wanted to ask her whether they're still cutting the mountaintops whether the lakes are still drying today i showed the person i was with pictures of waterfalls and palaces and forests and snow-white north something odd pulls me back with increasing force i can't ignore it ever again
#i just dont know how else to tell you everything !!! santoor from a different room the large family gathering the black tea with saffron#drank out of delicate glass and gold vessels cold marble on hot nights big stars big rivers big mountains#visible from busy tehran roads the ease of conversation tension eased by sarcasm tall tall cliffsides you drive by#rushing to put on headscarves before the head teacher comes in a rave by the base of damavand massive sun pastel purple skies#disjunct architecture trucks on road sides with fresh fruits pomegranates watermelons oranges everywhere#the smell of golpar on tangerines beautiful girls in tehran holding hands bautiful boys in kermanshah speaking kurdish the janky#cars on the verge of breakdown held together by love caspian sea lighting up in spring staying up into the morning on noruz#my friends uncle sang and played setar his son played the violin a little fear a lot of love remnants of something#grand carved into the cliffside everything feels bigger taller the landscape swallows you it smells like#illegally imported wine and orange blossoms and auntie's tahchin soaking your eyes in warm tea when youre sick#tomatoes and salt concrete and stone something mandmade and something raw new flag old resilience#the anger getting to us bruised eyes big grin all i know is the north i feel sorry my mother asks if id be okay#if they got a place in tajikistan we love each other enough dont we? when we look in the mirror we see each other. theres a love letter#across the border and it says I MISS YOU IM GLAD YOURE DOING BETTER itll never be the same im not okay with it at all there are no more#stars i miss jumping over big fires i miss our fireworks im sorry we cant be happy anymore everyone#leaves the mint and rosewater and sunlight for a reason.#it's not pride it's just generational regret
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theodeckrs · 3 months ago
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so… we did a thing today. feeling insane rn.
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babsaros · 6 months ago
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they talk about testosterone gel like it’s the fentanyl of hrt
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tapakah0 · 1 year ago
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pushing500 · 1 month ago
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XiaoLiang had a mental break that we didn't feel like dealing with, so we put him in a transport pod and sent him back to Arwell—with Rand to keep an eye on him and also to get her out of our hair as well.
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Bonus image of Mechi's intrusive thoughts
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This desert is so goddamn crowded...
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Komnenos was rescued from the pirates and shooed off our lawn, and probably reminded the lads on her way out that The Empire is still waiting to do Yeoman bestowing ceremonies for the both of them.
We've had our constructoids building a throneroom over the last few days, so after the lads give it a test run with some meditation, maybe we'll have to get them both their new titles...
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They didn't really strike me as "royal gossip" types, but at least they're enjoying their throne room, I guess.
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poorly-drawn-mdzs · 6 months ago
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Ooh, you want to know what happens at the gay bar run by ex-pirates, ooh...You'll just have to read Tiger Tiger to find out...
(Inspired by this Disco Elysium comic)
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bookinit02 · 6 months ago
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realizing i do this thing that i really really hate which is when i’m originally super excited about something but the default reaction is something negative i’ll eventually just start spouting off a million disclaimers every time i bring it up. like yeah i’m majoring in creative writing haha don’t worry i know i’m never gonna make any money haha i’m definitely going to just get a practical job and publish on the side maybe if i’m lucky!! like NO bitch have some confidence in yourself😭😭 goddamn i’m such a pushover
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trans-yllz · 1 month ago
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if you have a peephole/can check who is outside without being seen in any way, assume that you do not recognize this person and it's not a delivery guy
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napping-sapphic · 11 days ago
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!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
woke up to the cat on the bed cuddling with me: very normal she’s obsessed with me
sat up and saw the OTHER cat on the bed with me: ?????? AHHH!!!!! VERY exciting!!! Freaking out a little
She’s so timid and never sleeps on anyone’s bed with them so this is like kind of insane
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Haru this Haru that.... Tenma will always be Endou's first child 🧑‍🍼
I have a serious beef with this kid, don't mind me
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