#there was an actual thought process behind this one but it's not that interesting so. let's leave it at that.
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slurmpinheimer · 3 days ago
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from @cyber-harpie !! spit that shit homie!! I thought this deserved to be seen because it brings up a lot interesting points—and I do agree with this, though it got me thinking again. I would like to add a few things to my initial statement because analysis and talking about Kim is fun;
(WARNING: MAJOR KIM-RELATED YAPPAGE BELOW)
I’ve watched several play throughs where (especially at the beginning of the game/if they have low psyche) people aren’t sure of Kim, or even go so far as to call him annoying, a buzzkill, or an asshole. At first I found myself getting really defensive about this. Obviously not to the point that I made any hate comments or anything, that would be silly— But just in my head, automatically dismissing it because I love him and didn’t want to hear it. I couldn’t imagine anyone disliking him, instead of thinking deeper and considering *why* people might come to these conclusions.
I believe the bits we get from Esprit and Empathy support my initial point that Harry is the perfect narrative device to meet Kim through. If I remember correctly, Kim was written specifically to find Harry funny, and Harry’s skills let us see that. and that’s IF you succeed the checks, or if you’re dedicated enough to save scum to see other possibilities/go through Fayde to see what other options might have held.
Like, before I learned about the end of the Homosexual Underground thought line, I certainly had my suspicions. I definitely thought Kim was at least queer-coded and headcanoned him as gay, but that thought trail is behind a legendary Composure check that I spent like 10 full minutes save-scumming. I had low motorics on my first run, and I only tried so hard because I had been spoiled and knew that it gave a thought called “Homosexual Underground” and needed to see where that led with my own eyes.
That’s just one example too—There’s several times that Kim Lore is behind hard checks (Ace’s High/Low, that tidbit about him smoking weed lol) or things he just refuses to elaborate on without specific circumstances. Plus there’s all the stuff that you can learn when you play a different quest line. I’ve had several people tell me that going through a fascist ends up with Kim actually being pretty open about things you don’t learn about in other questlines. I don’t even know all the details of that yet because I’ve been so busy doing the other quests and achievements that I haven’t finished a fascist run yet.
My thought process with all this is that without seeing Kim through the lens Harry, who works with him almost constantly for a week straight in a situation where deep and meaningful conversation is not just encouraged but *needed* to build a repertoire and ultimately solve the case—Not to mention the patience and care Kim treats Harry’s situation with—I can see how someone would look at Kim from the outside and find him to be… (anguish at typing out this word) …mid.
So yeah. On the surface level; Kim is a cop. He can be condescending and uptight, sometimes leading into lecturing people (something he himself admits). He plays his cards close to his chest, with both his moralist beliefs and even more so his sympathies for the rebellion—Which can make him look a bit like a fence sitter. He can be emotionally unavailable towards himself and others, making him hard to read and sometimes appear cold.
But past that, he is a beautifully crafted, deep character, and the perfect foil to the chaos that is Harry. He is the man that reaches out to shake your hand even though you ghosted him two days prior. He will pat you and give you a handkerchief when you throw up. He can be the man that sticks up for you time and time again, not just because he needs to in order to solve the case, but because if you really try, he believes you’re a good detective at heart. Past suicidal rants and nervous breakdowns, he encourages you to keep going.
He has been beaten down, ground and polished to a smooth finish by mutiple facets of oppression—from his glasses, to his race, his sexuality, all fundamental parts of himself that he cannot change. From years of working in a high-pressure, volatile work environment with low pay and little benefits other than the small satisfaction of completing a case, only to dive headfirst into the next one.
He pushed aside his lofty dreams of the skies to be down with the rest of us in the dirt and mud, trudging, struggling through life until we all inevitably burn away the fuel reserves and are nothing but smoke, a memory in the mind of fire.
Beyond that carefully constructed exterior, past his wall of professionalism (and habit of using his notebook as a shield) hides a goofy nerd, a lover of crosswords and cars, of silly radio stations, and a deep appreciation for beautifully bearded muscular men. He is an expert user of sarcasm and master of cryptic jokes, some even philosophical or political in nature. At his core, he wants to make things better for the people around him. He wants to believe he can make a difference, no matter how long it takes or how small the change is. Even if working for the RCM destroys him before he can see it come to fruition.
He is wonderful. He is amazing. He’s probably my favorite character all of fiction, and I don’t think there will ever be a day in my life that I stop loving him. That’s pookie you’re talking about. I’ll always have space in my heart for him.
He will live on as long as we do, as real as The Man From Hjemdall is to Roy because Disco Elysium *made* him real, handcrafting him, giving him life between margins and pixels. And that is worth everything.
Kim Kitsuragi is a fascinating character because there's not that much fun or interesting or compelling about him. And yet somehow over the course of playing Disco Elysium the game rewires your fucking brain around him. He's the middest man you've ever seen in both appearance and personality but at some point he says something kind to you or something critical of you and you feel like you just got hit by a truck and you need his approval like you need oxygen and like how tf did this happen. what are you
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shiny-jr · 3 days ago
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Recently I read the Ignihyde chapter of Damnation, and I wanted to start by saying I really enjoyed the read! I'm already a big fan of your writing, and the chapter had multiples points where I was worried for the MC (though a lot of the time I just wanted them to stand up for themself, lol). I think the way Idia was written was really interesting, and it's fun seeing the cockier(?) side of him, if that makes sense. I was wondering while reading though, what was the thought process behind making MC one of the imps? I don't mean this in a bad way, I think it was a perfect way to explore a different personality for the MC, but I wondered why you decided on Panic instead of Meg? If it were me, I would probably end up defaulting to replacing Meg- 1) Because I prefer characters like her and 2) Because the imps probably wouldn't even cross my mind. I'd like to hear your thoughts and reasons behind this decision! Take care!
I've very glad you enjoyed the read! As for why this Imp!MC is the way they are well, that's just cause I wanted them like that. Let's be honest and consider the situation, how many people would stand up for themselves in their position? Certainly not everyone. Some, yes, but not all. It's likely that some of the other MCs of the series would have stood up for themselves, but Imp!MC isn't like that. Hopefully it wasn't annoying?
As for Idia... Hot take, y'all. I'm about to say it. I'm tired of nervous stuttering Idia. I said it. The dude has so much potential, so much attitude and hidden arrogance that we usually don't see, but it's certainly there, and I wanted to explore that. And, well, considering the fact that his role in Damnation is literal a god, it provided the perfect opportunity.
Now, back to MC. Why make them an imp? Well, because it's fun. How generic is the idea of placing them in Meg's role? It's quite a common one, and I believe I've done it before in another quiz that's so old and probably really bad that I refuse to actually look at it again, but I digress.
The purpose of the MCs is that they are not good people. Meg, while starting out as a villain, does eventually switch sides. So besides the idea of the MC being Meg is kinda basic, I just didn't want the MC to be on the "good" side. I love Meg as a character, but yeah, I just wasn't for the idea of implementing the MC into her role.
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mourn-and-watch · 10 months ago
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do you guys think that anders who is also known for his eagerness to drown kirkwall in blood to keep hawke safe among other things has ever half-jokingly told karl that he would burn the circle down for his sake just to become a sparkle that finally set the circle that killed him on fire
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buttercupshands · 7 months ago
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I just managed to get off mha hyperfixation
And now it's happening again... Oh no
Helps with upcoming MHUI LoV event tho, it was a long time since last one happened I wonder what would happen in a new filler story part
Basically this and couple of pages of mid-final arc chapters + recent episode and next one being The Dabi episode was just too much not to get excited again
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But! Important thing - I need to reread the last arc before I make anything new, if possible without finishing it to the 419 chapter and everything after, it took 2 months to really recover from the damage that chapter did
Anyway am I ready for the new event? Kinda! Do I have enough gems to get new Tomura? No! I'm not sure he'll even show up this time, because other ones were and still are really stubborn
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Also Steampunk recruit took like 120 pulls in a step-up recruit and in the usual one combined
Not the best time to get LoV involved, it's cruel even
Also that one part of the page I added at the beginning was so interesting to look at and them I joked about 236 being similar. The only good thing with final arc being over is that I can say that Izuku didn't draw the parallel of seeing everyone hurt and seeing Tenko react on Mon's death
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Understandable why, but it's funny to just look at them and be like, "wow Horikoshi traumatized them both"
#bnha#mhui#morning thoughts#not art#tenko shimura#shigaraki tomura#izuku midoriya#midoriya izuku#Still trying to assure myself that it's okay to tag whatever with whatever#If I get into drawing Izuku and Tenko interacting again this post is why#I don't prefer shipping stuff aside from here and there but some of the relationships are so interesting to look at#Izuku and Tenko one is one of my favorites and when PLF arc ended with Izuku looking behind who Tomura was on the outside was...#I can't describe it because I was SURE it was never happening and then it did and almost 3 years after that we get the actual thing#And then boom it's over#I thing knowing that AFO shows up in the 418 ruined it for me I saw people trying to predict it and stuff#But I hoped it wasn't gonna happen but I didn't know what would the other option be#So I was in 'we'll see' mindset for months and I'm okay with the end result... Kinda#It hurts really badly if I turn to my actual emotions#I was just thinking one day and while reading stuff decided to punch a pillow and suddenly it's like some wall broke and it hurt#It hurts now too actually just writing this#I thought because I wasn't processing this the way most people I saw in the fandom did with all of the hating on Horikoshi and stuff#AND hating on Izuku too!#I was either broken or a strange one even to the part of the fandom I tried to join for the first time in ages#While people were clinging to anything to keep deluding themselves that Tomura is alive#Or being openly angry on Twitter#It all was on Twitter actually because I have no power to really change what it shows if I don't just “ignore” every single person there#I tried drawing through it but I slowly hit burnout with drawing absolutely nothing#I'm a bit better now and I tried different things instead so it's alright still a bit... Too much all at once since I had irl stuff too#I'm glad that I'm not known enough to be pressured about anything since I pressure myself enough already
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lightcreators · 4 hours ago
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Once  you  become  powerful  enough,  age  becomes  optional.  Ah,  he  knew  someone  else  confirming  that  sentence  so  brutally,  he  laughed  automatically  with  embarrassment.  Maybe  it  has  been  horribly  naive  of  his  part,  but  he  thought  afterwards  the  example  of  Lelouch  vi  Britannia  (  with  Hades-sama,  that  will  be  once  more  pushed  behind  and  pretending  he  had  been  unconcerned  on  the  matter  ),  he  wouldn't  met  people  …  that  old.  Information  of  immortality  coming  from  Lelouch  hadn't  been  exposed  by  main  concerned,  no,  because  that  boy  was  far  too  much  busier  to  ensure,  inside  chessboards  of  another  locations,  he  would  gain  his  point  towards  Hades-sama.  It  has  been  Teito  who  expressed  the  news.  Did  he  actually  processed  the  information  until  then  ?  He  thought  he  was,  but  apparently  no.  His  age,  on  the  other  hand,  had  been  communicated  from  the  beginning.  Nineteen  years  old.  Nineteen  years  old  and  already  immortal.  With  a  God  of  the  Underworld  who  looked  like  someone  horribly  young,  and  who  seemed  to  play  with  Lelouch's  appearance.  Immortality,  he  knew  nothing  about  it,  and  didn't  seek  it.  It  had  fallen  on  his  head.  Like  several  other  pieces  of  information  from  his  valiant  friends  in  which  the  word  demon  had  a  much  more  demonic  connotation  than  warm  side  of  being  a  Maoh.  If  Hades-sama  would  have  wanted  to  exchange  two  words  with  him,  he  wouldn't  have  know  what  he  was  supposed  to  say!  !  He  faced  somewhere  same  problem  with  Draguel  realizing  he  was  more  divine  than  planned and expected.
❝  Once  at  the  top,  I  guess  there's  only  the  others  left  to  observe.  ❞  He  commented  carefully.  Meeting  with  Lelouch  has  been  made  during  his  greatest  period  where  he  couldn't  be  worse  inside  whatever  first  impression  and  conclusion  you've  must  have  of  him.  He  had  no  matter  to  manipulate  him  for  whatever  ambition  since  his  Maoh  position  concerning  another  world,  and  coming  from  his  behavior,  there  was  nothing  interesting  enough,  educating  him  towards  opened  door  he  got  has  been  his  happy  ending.  Nevertheless,  if  some  day  pleasure  reached  his  mind,  and  find  him  not  enough  rightful  on  his  position  of  king,  that  nice  Emperor  giving  himself  the  pass  to  interfere  in  middle  of  Shinmakoku.  Wolfram  has  been  indirectly  spared  because  he  always  acted  as  his  protector,  and  ensure  everything  was  fine,  but  the  dreadfully  warning  wind  about  how  he  migtht  be  threatened  as  an  noble  stayed  present.  Teito-san  was  here  for  calm  down  Lelouch,  hence  they  has  been  fine  …  ❝  Ah  …  ❞  Rest  of  his  explanation  generated  complete  confusion .  ❝  An  divine  one  then  …  ❞  He  finally  expressed  the  words,  confessed  that  conclusion  that  needed  to  be  exposed.
Following  explanations  generated  an  additional  sadness.  A  settling  of  scores  that  had  led  to  nothing.  A  settling  of  scores  that  had  only  destroyed.  Dramatically,  it  sensed  this  was  the  ruins  of  something  else  in  which  he  received  the  reflection  without  any  kind  of  context.  There  was  indeed  a  fight  going  on  between  an  Emperor  and  an  God,  which,  so  far,  generated  NO  CONSEQUENCES.  Have  you  ever  met  the  creator  of  your  own  word  ?  No.  Wouldn't  probably  never  met  that  guy.  Hades-sama,  otherwise,  yes,  but  he  didn't  created  the  Earth.  ❝  It's  a  sad  result.  A  war  of  egos  that  ends  in  irreparable,  age-old  consequences  to  resolve,  without  any  happy  ending  in  return.  ❞  There  was  an  following  silence,  as  he  accepted  to  confess  about  it.  ❝  I  will  probably  never  met  the  creator  of  my  own  world,  or  whatever  creator  if  I  want  to  be  honest  with  you,  though  I've  met  temporary  …  one  God  of  the  Underworld.  Name  must  be  unknown  there.  Hades-sama,  the  protector  of  the  dead  ---  ❞  Late  realization  came  towards  density  of  revelations  he  was  currently  exposing.  The  Creator  of  this  world  died  ?  The  Creator  of  this  world  dissociating  himself  and  has  been  the  one  engaging  that  fight  ?  For  some  reason,  especialy  with  chessboard  talk  he  had  once  in  a  while  with  Lelouch,  and  how  Teito  exposed  Lelouch  interference  with  him,  he  was  certain  it  wasn't  insignificant.  ❝  Wait,  it's  your  world's  own  god  who  decided  to  fight  against  himself  to  ultimately  cause  simple  destruction,  and  remain  unique  and  isolated  somewhere  ?  How  could  this  world  hold  even  a  minute  without  a  Creator  to  support  it  ?  ❞  He  needed  then  to  process  his  next  words.  ❝  You  are  like  the  last  standing  guardian  of  a  kingdom  that  could  collapse  at  any  moment  because  your  own  god  has  abandoned  you?  ❞  Inside  higher  spheres,  they  always  must  be  someone  handle  responsibilities  of  the  board  as  the  Game  Master,  the  one  handle  foundations  of  his  own  world.  Lelouch  could  have  that  adventurous  life  because  one  best  friend  handled  responsabilities  in  his  absence,  allowed  yet  to  touch  that  kind  of  life.  State  of  this  world  was  more  serious  of  everything  he  could  have  guessed  at  first  approach.  ❝  No,  you  doesn't  rambled  too  much.  I  understand  how  serious  it's  is.  I  would  love  to  bring  hope  but  it  will  be  harder  that  I  initially thought  …  ❞
Old is a understatement of the century, or thousands of years. though the word was said, he is much older. One of the first beings in the world, though his state at the time was more then the current state of his being. One being seperated into three, the creator god of this world was ever potent in even dealing with something as strong as him. But Dagruel is ever duty bounded, invisible chains that bind him to duty, to wisdom that allow him to last far longer then most beings would. A million years is nothing to him, for he is demon lord Dagruel. King of the giants and everything that comes with it. his only consolation is that one part of him roams the land, enjoying freedom that he never could have.
"Once you become powerful enough, age becomes optional. Though I somewhat envy those who can, my concept is a being that can never age conceptually." Dagruel appeared in the world as if, no childhood, no mother no father. in truth he is ______
"The demons lords...had achieved nothing, but to show their grief. A importance existence was destroyed, tell me. Have you ever met the creator of your own world? I have. And he has created many static beings. But he died, and two of those beings ever decided to fight, one for grief. one for duty."
there were more beings, one such being within the palace itself. the fallen angel deeno, once name Lucifer but now... in any case it wasn't important enough to bring him up. Maybe he is sleeping somewhere else, lazing around as his very concept is to just watch. Unable to escape the fate of what their duty bounds them to.
"My duty, to the creator is this. To guard the gates of heaven itself which stands above us. And to guard the seal to prevent this world from becoming destroyed. Even now, the world itself could die should this seal break."
Duty is the chain that binds.
"Ah, I rambled too much. But I suppose its because you are a existence that can't do anything about it. that I could."
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poguelandiarafe · 5 days ago
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thinking about surprising drew by getting your nipples pierced <3 (aka me living vicariously through y/n because i’m terrified of the pain)
masterlist
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“i need to show you something.”
“should i be concerned?” drew teases, suspicion creeping across his face.
you laugh and shake your head, stepping closer to him. he puts his phone down so you have his full attention, interest peaking when you settle yourself on his lap. the loose t-shirt you’re wearing brushes against your sensitive nipples causing you to grimace slightly. his eyes trail over you face as you debate whether to tell him first or just show him. you decide on the latter.
in one swift motion, your t-shirt is discarded on the floor, exposing your bare chest. drew’s eyebrows furrow in confusion until he notices the silver piercings.
his jaw drops in shock, “fuck, no way.”
“you like them then?” you chuckle, satisfied with his reaction.
he can’t take his eyes off your chest, blinking multiple times as if processing what you’ve done. he’d heard you talk about doing it a million times, but he never thought he’d see the day you actually did.
“i can’t believe you finally did it. shit, they look so good.” he groans, hands instinctively going to touch them before he stops, “how long?”
you know what he’s asking, and it pains you to tell him, “at least six to eight weeks.”
his head shoots up and his eyes widen, “eight weeks! baby, that’s like… two months. i can’t go that long without touching them, that’s torture.”
you roll your eyes playfully, leaning back to grab your shirt and put it back on, “i’m sure you’ll survive.”
“i won’t.” he sighs dramatically, hands squeezing your hips instead.
“you’ll have to.”
you lean into him, pressing a kiss to his lips which he tries to deepen. but you don’t let him, finding it much more amusing to fully climb off his lap and disappear into the kitchen.
“you’re killing me, y/l/n.” he murmurs, getting up and following you.
a proud smirk graces your lips as you feel him press up against you from behind, muscular arms encircling your waist to keep you flush against his chest.
“yet you still love me, starkey.”
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annabelle--cane · 11 months ago
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"the magnus protocol had a whole ARG beforehand? what?"
yes! it did!
"oh so I need to have participated in this whole big thing to actually understand the podcast?"
not at all! from the official post-mortem put out by RQ, "while the ARG was not something that was necessary to participate in to understand the magnus protocol, it was designed to contain a wealth of background story and context that would enrich any player's listening experience."
"a wealth of background context that would enrich my listening experience 👀👀👀 how can I learn about this?"
SO glad you asked. sadly, many of the materials made for the arg have been taken down since the game ended 😔 (ex., the official OIAR, magnus institute, and bonzoland websites. (edit ii: I found partial wayback machine captures! see below) though @strangehauntsuk is still up!), so we're a bit low on primary sources, but in terms of learning about what happened:
for a starting point, I would really recommend this video by @pinkelotjeart
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it's super accessible, it was made in real time as the game progressed and follows the solving and revelation of clues as they happened, it hits all the major points of the mystery and moments of community insanity while eliding some of the nitty gritty puzzle grinding, 10/10 would recommend.
here's the official summary put out by RQ, and I'd recommend reading through this once you've already gotten a basic handle on the flow of the story and the basic connections between major clues and events. it's got some fun behind-the-scenes info and lays out the thought process behind the puzzles in simple terms
here's the full masterdoc of all puzzles and resolutions put together in the statement remains discord server. masterdoc my absolute BELOVED, masterdoc my bethrothed, masterdoc my soul mate. I'd recommend this as a second port of call after the above video as it either contains all details about the puzzles or links to other expanded docs that do.
here's the narrative summary doc that lays out all the plot and lore discovered in three pages of plain prose. if you just want to get to the good bits as fast as you can and get blasted directly in the face by contextless lore bombs, this is the doc for you. if you don't want to start with the video, I'd say this is another good entry point.
once you've got the lay of the land, some of the game materials that I found particularly interesting include:
the in-universe east germany expat usenet forum, with all content translated into english. most of it is irrelevant space filler with occasional extremely sus lore, but I still found it fun to read through. love to soak in some fictional forum drama.
chdb.xlsx, the spreadsheet of the names of all the children the protocol 'verse magnus institute was studying/experimenting on. EDIT: here is a version of the sheet without any annotations and with all of the names in their original order, kudos to @theboombutton for catching that the commonly shared copy had the order swapped around.
klaus.xls, a (very corrupted) spreadsheet with what looks like the classifications of a bunch of old OIAR cases.
EDIT: have a few more saved materials from the game that I forgot to include.
an in-universe audio ad to apply to the OIAR that ran before archives episodes and kicked off the whole game.
an in-universe video ad to apply to the OIAR, this one is an official upload that's still up from the game itself. you can subscribe to the OIAR's official youtube channel today, if you so chose.
the robo-voicemail greeting from the OIAR's phone line.
EDIT II:
here is a wayback machine capture of the OIAR's official website.
here is a wayback machine capture of the bonzoland website.
(pretty sure both of the above captures just archived the home pages, though I haven't tried clicking all of the links. I'd say they're still worth looking at, the home pages give a good window into the vibes.)
once you start poking around in these documents, you'll find a bunch of links to others with further information, the materials I've included here just contain what I feel to be the most relevant details to getting a broad feel for the whole game. once again, huge shout out to the statement remains server, I was barely in there as the ARG was in progress and only ducked my head in every so often to find links like these. true mvps of the fandom.
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prettieinpink · 2 months ago
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HABITS TO IMPLEMENT BEFORE THE END OF THE YEAR ᡣ𐭩ྀིྀི₊ ⊹
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DAILY AFFIRMATIONS
You can choose whatever time you’d like to say positive and affirmative statements to yourself. When saying affirmations, use the first person and present tense. E.g I am healthy, I take care of myself, and I am strong academically. 
Affirmations are so helpful because our brains struggle to tell the difference between imagination and reality. So, when we visualise ourselves doing something that's not actually happening, it stimulates the brain areas as if we were actually experiencing it.
So, repetitive affirmations will encourage your brain to treat it as fact. While this only works to an extent, it does help with self-sabotaging thought actions and thought patterns. 
EATING MINDFULLY
Eating mindfully is the practice of when consuming anything, you put your full focus on that meal. There are no devices that may distract you, you’re eating slowly and paying close attention to how different meals make your body feel. 
To eat mindfully, focus on the time it takes for you to finish your food. Is it enough time for your body to give signals about your meal? To chew thoroughly? Another thing is to turn off and eliminate any distractions. Such as being on any devices or multitasking. 
Eating too quickly means that your body may not have enough time to tell you that it's full. When you eat mindfully, it's easier for your body to register when it's full. Furthermore, it's easier to distinguish between true hunger and non-hunger triggers for eating. 
CREATIVE OUTLETS
For a lot of us, 2024 was a stressful year. We’re constantly hustling and not letting ourselves process what's happening in and around us. Having a creative outlet helps us to release and detach from those emotions. It allows us to experience that feeling, but leave it all behind in the end. 
Some examples are painting, clay artwork, creative writing, designing, sewing, crocheting and music. There’s a lot more you could do, but ultimately you have to do what's best for yourself. 
LEARNING SOMETHING NEW EVERYDAY
At least one thing each day: aim to learn something completely new to you. Other than the fact that you are learning something new, it allows for your curiosity to grow and expand outside of your typical education institution. With curiosity, comes with the skill of being able to explore complications and come up with solutions. 
There are many ways you can learn, but I think the best way is by coming up with your questions in an area you’re unfamiliar with and then looking for an answer to your question. 
My favourite way has to be watching video essays. Doesn’t always have to be social commentary, but anything that seems interesting enough for me. 
COMPLIEMENT-A-DAY
I love receiving compliments from strangers. It leaves the widest smile on my face and I swear I feel so much lighter like I’m floating around. However, I never think to give a compliment to someone else who I don’t know. So, whenever you see the cutest outfit or the perfect lip combo, make sure to say it!
For those who may be shy in those kinds of interactions, practice saying it in your head. You don’t have to say it out loud to them, but thinking positively of other people will reflect on how you think about yourself. 
That is it for this post, thank you for reading until the end ♥︎ Until next time, take care of yourself ᡣ𐭩ྀིྀི₊ ⊹
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gardenwons · 3 months ago
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NERDY AND NASTY
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SYNOPSIS maybe making a nerd beg for your forgiveness was your kink? And maybe making you beg was also his?
PAIRINGS nerd!heeseung x popular!reader
WARNINGS smut with plot(?), switch!heeseung, making out, unprotected sex, cunnilingus, size kink, praising, somewhat insecure heeseung, hint at future 3some
A/N 8k+ words heavily inspired by all the nerd fics *leeechin and her loser!hoon pls.. im currently reading and eating up, loser!hee is long overdue at this point needed to make him a priority lol also super sleepy so not proofread
“I really don’t think you should go through with this. You’ll chew him up and spit him out,” Wonyoung whispered in your ear, her eyes flicking toward the guy a few seats ahead of you.
You hadn’t been paying attention to class for the past two hours, too busy eyeing Heeseung���lanky, messy hair, big glasses that slipped down his nose as he furiously scribbled notes. Something about the way he muttered to himself and hunched over his textbooks made you wonder what he’d be like when things got... intimate. You found yourself biting on your bottom lip and grinned.
“Do you think he’s a virgin?” you whispered back to Wonyoung, ignoring her warning.
She giggled softly. “Maybe. But even nerds have game these days. Might as well find out.”
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“I swear, Y/N is staring at you,” Jungwon whispered excitedly, nudging Heeseung’s arm for what felt like the hundredth time. Heeseung tried to ignore him, rolling his eyes.
“No way. She doesn’t even know I exist,” he muttered, flipping through his notes with forced indifference. The idea of you noticing him was ridiculous. You were you—confident, untouchable. He was just some guy trying to survive the semester.
But then, he chanced a glance behind him, just to prove Jungwon wrong. His heart jumped into his throat when his eyes met yours. You didn’t look away. In fact, you winked at him.
Heeseung’s face flushed crimson as he whipped his head back to the front, his pulse racing. Jungwon snickered beside him, clearly enjoying his reaction.
“Told you, man,” Jungwon teased.
Heeseung’s thoughts were spinning. There was no way someone like you would actually be interested in him... right? But he couldn’t help the small spark of hope that flickered in his chest. You, the girl everyone wanted, were giving him attention. For once, he wasn’t invisible. And that both terrified and excited him.
You slipped through the mass of students as soon as class ended, making a beeline toward Heeseung. He was still at his desk, packing up his notes, oblivious to the fact that you were heading straight for him.
Jungwon noticed you first, eyes widening in surprise as he fumbled with his notebooks, hugging them to his chest. “H-Hi, Y/N,” he stammered, his voice cracking slightly as he elbowed Heeseung hard to get his attention.
Heeseung let out a small groan, rubbing his side as he looked up. His expression shifted from irritation to wide-eyed surprise when he saw you standing in front of him.
“Hey, I’m Y/N,” you introduced yourself with a casual smile, though you knew you didn’t have to. Your reputation precedes you, but there was something cute about doing it anyway—like a formality. You watched as both of them stammered out their own introductions, even though you already knew their names. They were shy, but that just added to the fun.
“I know who you guys are,” you continued, leaning in slightly. “I was wondering if you’d want to group up for the project? Wonyoung ditched me for someone else, and I thought it’d be okay to work with you guys.” It was a harmless cover, but in reality, you had your eyes on Heeseung for other reasons. Still, two birds with one stone, good grades and a chance to see what Heeseung was really about.
Jungwon immediately nodded, almost too eagerly, slapping a hand on Heeseung’s shoulder. “We’d love that,” he said with a grin, giving Heeseung a look as if urging him to just go along with it.
Heeseung blinked, clearly still processing the fact that you were talking to them at all. “Uh, yeah, I guess it’d be fine,” he mumbled, his lips curling into a shy smile as he glanced at you nervously.
“Perfect! Let me give you guys my number,” you said, flashing them a confident smile. Both of them handed over their phones without hesitation. You quickly entered your contact information on Heeseung’s phone, adding a little heart next to your name for good measure before handing it back.
Jungwon’s eyes darted between you and Heeseung, a knowing grin playing on his lips as you sauntered off. “Dude,” he muttered, nudging Heeseung again, “you better not mess this up.”
Heeseung just stood there, staring at his phone, his heart racing as he saw your name and the heart emoji.
“I’m not sure what just happened,” he muttered under his breath, still in disbelief, “but I think I’m in trouble.”
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Two days had passed, and you were growing impatient. Not a single text from either Heeseung or Jungwon. Were they really that swamped with schoolwork, or were they just too shy to make the first move? Deciding you’d waited long enough, you took matters into your own hands and set out to track Heeseung down.
You checked all the usual spots where nerds hang out—the library, the study hall, even the cafeteria—but no luck. Then, as you wandered the quieter part of campus, you passed by the music room. It was mostly abandoned now, dusty and forgotten, but something made you stop. A soft humming caught your ear, pulling you toward the ajar door.
Peeking in, you spotted Heeseung sitting alone, flipping through his notebook and humming quietly to himself. The sight of him caught you off guard—he looked so... at peace. You watched him for a moment, his soft voice filling the empty room. No wonder you couldn’t find him earlier; no one came here anymore.
After a minute of listening, you knocked gently on the door, making him jump. His wide eyes shot up to meet yours, looking startled—almost terrified—at the sight of you standing there.
“S-Sorry, I didn’t know you were—” he started, scrambling out of his seat, offering it to you in a flustered rush. It was the only clean seat in the room, the rest of the space coated in dust and neglect.
But you weren’t focused on that. Your eyes were drawn to him—his usually neat appearance was slightly undone. Two buttons on his shirt were carelessly unbuttoned, his tie loosened around his neck, and the messy look was doing things to you. He looked unexpectedly... hot.
Heeseung, on the other hand, was fumbling through an apology, but all you could think about was how good he looked, so different from his usual polished self.
You rolled your eyes, sitting down with a huff, blowing loose strands of hair away from your face. As you settled in, you beckoned Heeseung toward you with a slow curl of your finger. His breath hitched, and you could already see the nervous sweat forming on his forehead, his body stiff with tension as your presence overwhelmed him. Reluctantly, he shuffled closer until he crouched down, his wide eyes barely able to meet yours as you stared him down.
“It’s not very nice to leave me waiting,” you said coolly, your voice laced with annoyance. Heeseung’s cheeks flushed deeper as he nodded, his gaze flicking away quickly, unable to hold eye contact for more than a few seconds.
“I-i didn’t know what to message you...” he muttered, his voice barely above a whisper. He looked embarrassed, and the sight of him, so timid and unsure, almost made you laugh. Almost. But you bit down on your lip, forcing back the giggle bubbling up. Instead, you shrugged, feigning disinterest, as if his pathetic nervousness didn’t amuse you.
“A simple ‘hi’ would’ve worked,” you replied nonchalantly, watching him squirm under your gaze. You let the tension hang in the air before adding, “But now... I think I want an apology.”
Heeseung’s eyes widened, and he nodded quickly, already muttering, “Of course, I’m really sor—”
“On your knees,” you interrupted, your voice taking on a teasing, yet commanding tone. “Just so I know you’re sincere.” You fluttered your lashes at him, lips curling into a playful pout.
Heeseung’s breath hitched again, his throat visibly bobbing as he swallowed nervously. But he didn’t argue. Slowly, he dropped to his knees in front of you, his hands trembling slightly as they hovered by his sides, unsure of what to do. His face flushed a deeper red as his eyes unintentionally fell to the edge of your skirt, where the faintest hint of your pink panties teased him, peeking between your legs. His mouth went dry, and he quickly averted his eyes, his whole body tense as he knelt there, waiting for your next move.
You nodded, silently urging him to continue. Heeseung stammered, his voice shaky as he tried to find the right words. He felt embarrassed, hot under your intense gaze. Just moments ago, everything had been peaceful—normal even—but now, here he was, on his knees, trying to beg for forgiveness while resisting the growing urge to glance between your thighs.
“I-I’m really sorry, Y/N,” he whispered, his head dropping low in shame, every emotion swirling inside him, mixing into a mess of anxiety, desire, and guilt. He prayed none of it showed, especially the inappropriate thoughts creeping in as he tried to save face.
But you weren’t done. You reached down, gently grabbing his chin, tilting his head back up until his wide eyes met yours again. You fixed his glasses, which had slid down his nose, and ran your fingers through his messy hair. “You’re so cute like this, y’know?” you said softly, a teasing smile playing on your lips. Heeseung choked on his spit, blinking rapidly as his mind struggled to keep up with the situation.
Before he could respond, you stood up, the edge of your skirt brushing against his face. From this angle, he had an unobstructed view of the way your panties moulded perfectly to your cunt, leaving little to the imagination. His breath hitched, and he felt a dizzy wave wash over him. Heeseung’s face turned a shade of red so deep he thought he might faint.
“Oh god, I’m so sorry about that,” you said with mock innocence, feigning surprise as if you hadn’t planned it all along. Your voice dripped with playful teasing, and you watched as Heeseung struggled to regain control of his thoughts, his eyes darting anywhere but toward you.
You leaned down, lowering yourself to eye level with him again, your lips curling into a smirk. “You’ll forgive me, won’t you? After all i’ve already forgiven you,” you whispered, your tone dripping with suggestion. His mind raced, and his throat felt dry as he nodded frantically, completely out of his depth, but too entranced by you to say anything coherent.
Satisfied, you patted his cheek lightly before turning to leave, letting your fingers trail under his chin for just a moment longer. “Good boy,” you murmured under your breath, just loud enough for him to hear. With one last glance over your shoulder, you placed your phone up to remind him of what to do and walked out of the room, leaving Heeseung kneeling on the floor, heart pounding, utterly shaken.
Heeseung stayed frozen in place for a few moments after you left, still processing what had just happened. His hands trembled slightly as he ran them through his hair, mind racing, trying to figure out how to face you again—or if he even could.
Needless to say, he did message you. His text came in late that night, "Hey, about earlier... I'm really sorry again." You could almost picture him, blushing behind his phone, nervously typing and deleting his words before sending them. That was the moment your plan began to take shape.
It wasn’t long before the perfect opportunity arose. Heeseung and Jungwon invited you over to their place to work on the project. You had played it cool, agreeing without hesitation, masking your real intentions behind the promise of schoolwork. This was your chance to get Heeseung exactly where you wanted him.
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You stood outside their apartment door, a smirk tugging at the corners of your lips as you checked your reflection on your phone screen one last time. You’d dressed down, but in a way that still showed just enough—casual yet enticing. After all, you weren’t here just for the project.
When Jungwon opened the door, he greeted you with a warm smile, stepping aside to let you in. “Hey! Glad you could make it,” he said, gesturing toward the living room.
As you entered, you noticed immediately how much more relaxed they seemed in their own space. Heeseung sat on the couch, dressed in a fitted graphic tee that accentuated his lean frame, and joggers that hugged his legs perfectly. Gone was the timid, nerdy look he sported in class; here, he was undeniably handsome, and you couldn’t help but appreciate the transformation. Jungwon was equally attractive, his casual hoodie and jeans showcasing a well-defined physique that you hadn’t fully registered before.
“Hey, Heeseung,” you teased, letting your voice drop a little lower as you stepped further into the room. He looked up, his eyes widening slightly before he quickly averted his gaze, but not before you caught the flicker of something in his expression.
“Hey,” he mumbled, a nervous smile breaking through. You could see him trying to maintain his composure, but his cheeks betrayed him, coloring a light pink.
As you all settled down to work, Jungwon started outlining the project guidelines while Heeseung focused intently on his notes, though you noticed he couldn’t help stealing quick glances your way. You played along at first, discussing ideas, jotting down notes, and pretending to pay attention. But soon enough, the atmosphere shifted.
You stretched out casually, your shirt riding up just enough to reveal a hint of skin, drawing Heeseung’s gaze once again. “It’s getting hot in here,” you murmured, more to yourself but loud enough for Heeseung to hear. His fingers tightened around his pen, and you could see his jaw clench as he fought the urge to look directly at you.
“You okay, Hee?” you asked, your voice laced with playful concern. “You seem a little... distracted.”
Jungwon, oblivious to the tension, glanced over at Heeseung and chuckled. “Heeseung’s always like that when he’s stressed,” he said, shaking his head. “But we can take a break if you need one.” You noted how Jungwon didn’t realize that the real distraction was you, sitting so close, your knee brushing lightly against Heeseung's under the table.
He swallowed hard, struggling to maintain his composure as you continued to inch closer, your knee brushing against his under the table. It was a simple touch, but to him, it felt electric. His thoughts spiralled as his mind conjured images of everything he’d been trying to suppress since that day in the music room.
Suddenly, Heeseung stood up abruptly, almost knocking his chair over. “Uh, can you... can you guys give me a minute?” he stuttered, rubbing the back of his neck awkwardly. “I need to... um... take care of something.”
You raised an eyebrow, curiosity piqued. “Take care of what? We’re in the middle of a project, hee.”
“Yeah, it’s nothing! Just- just a quick break,” he said, his voice rising slightly in pitch. “I’ll be back in a second. Please, just give me a minute.”
He quickly retreated into the hallway, leaving you and Jungwon in stunned silence.
Jungwon looked over at you, puzzled. “Is he okay?”
You shrugged, suppressing a laugh at the absurdity of the situation. “I think he might be overwhelmed,” you said, a smirk playing on your lips.
“Maybe we should go check on him,” Jungwon suggested, but you shook your head.
“No, let him have his moment. It’s probably just a bathroom break or something,” you replied, biting your lip to hold back your amusement.
Taking a deep breath, Heeseung leaned against the wall, trying to calm his racing heart. He could hear you and Jungwon talking softly in the living room, and the reality of what was happening hit him hard. He was undeniably attracted to you, and the more you flirted, the more he found it impossible to focus.
With shaky hands, he fumbled for his phone and quickly typed out a message: Hey, I’m really sorry, but I’m feeling kind of sick. I think it’s best if we wrap this up for today.
He hesitated before hitting send, biting his lip as he envisioned your reaction. But it was better this way; he couldn’t risk being in the same room with you when his mind was racing in directions he didn’t want it to go.
After a moment that felt like an eternity, his phone buzzed with a reply. You had responded almost immediately: Are you okay? Do you want me to bring you anything?
He frowned at your concern, a mix of guilt and appreciation swirling in his chest. No, I’ll be fine. Just tired, I think. Thanks for understanding.
Another buzz. Okay, we can reschedule. Take care!
He sighed, relief washing over him. Thanks, Y/N.
He took a moment to collect himself, closing his eyes and leaning his head back against the wall. He felt guilty for lying, but he knew it was for the best, at least until he figured out how to handle his feelings.
When he finally stepped back into the living room, you and Jungwon were both looking at him expectantly. Jungwon spoke first, his brow furrowed. “Hey, everything okay? You look a little pale.”
“Yeah, I just... thought it was best to call it a day,” Heeseung said, forcing a smile. “I’m not feeling great, and I wouldn’t want to distract you guys from the project.”
You raised an eyebrow, concern evident in your eyes. “Are you sure? I can stay if you need anything.”
“No, really. I think it’s best if you go home and let me rest,” he insisted, trying to sound convincing.
“Okay, if you say so,” you replied, though the hint of disappointment in your voice didn’t go unnoticed by him.
You lingered for a moment, looking at Heeseung as if weighing your options. “Text me if you need anything, alright?”
“Of course,” he replied, forcing himself to sound upbeat.
With one last look, you finally turned to leave, and Heeseung felt a pang of regret hit him. As soon as the door closed behind you, he leaned against it, exhaling deeply.
“Everything okay?” Jungwon asked, glancing back at Heeseung, who was still trying to catch his breath. “You looked really flustered when Y/N was here.”
“Yeah, just... a bit overwhelmed,” Heeseung admitted, rubbing the back of his neck. “I didn’t want to freak out in front of her.”
“Dude, she’s into you,” Jungwon said, raising an eyebrow. “You could have just gone with it. Instead, you made her leave.”
“I know,” Heeseung sighed, kicking at the floor. “I just... I don’t know how to handle this. I’m still trying to figure out what I feel.”
Jungwon smirked, shaking his head. “Well, good luck figuring that out while you’re trying to hide your crush. Just don’t take too long.. I don’t want to see you miss your chance.”
Heeseung groaned, plopping down on the couch. “Thanks for the pep talk.”
“Anytime,” Jungwon said with a grin, heading into the kitchen to grab a snack. Heeseung watched him go, feeling a mix of frustration and longing.
Alone in the silence of the apartment, he couldn’t shake the feeling that he had just made a huge mistake.
You couldn’t shake the gnawing feeling of concern for Heeseung after he texted you that he was sick. Even though you had shared playful banter, something in his message had felt off, igniting a spark of worry within you. The thought of him alone in his apartment, feeling under the weather, was enough to propel you into action. Determined to check on him, you decided to surprise him with a visit.
With a small bag of snacks in hand, you made your way to Heeseung’s apartment. The soft sound of your footsteps echoed in the quiet hallway, a stark contrast to the anticipation thrumming in your chest. As you entered Heeseung's apartment, courtesy of Jungwon for lending you a spare key, the cozy space wrapped around you like a warm blanket. The gentle aroma of herbal tea wafted through the air, mingling with the faint scent of laundry. Heeseung was curled up on the couch, bundled in a thick blanket, looking adorably vulnerable, but there was a flicker of mischief in his eyes. His hair was tousled, and his cheeks had a faint flush that made him look even more endearing.
“Hey, how are you feeling?” you asked softly, crossing the room to kneel beside him.
He turned his head slightly, his large eyes widening with surprise and delight. “Y/N? I didn’t expect to see you here. I thought I told you I was sick.” His voice was a little too casual, and you could see the corners of his mouth twitching upward, betraying his facade.
You smirked, settling down beside him. “Exactly. That’s why I came to check on you. You can’t just lie around here and get worse. Someone has to take care of you.”
He chuckled weakly, but there was an unmistakable glint of mischief behind his eyes. “You really didn’t have to.”
“Too bad! I’m here now,” you declared, standing up and placing your hands on your hips, feigning authority. “Now, let’s see if you have a fever.”
Heeseung raised an eyebrow, suddenly hesitant. “Uh, are you sure you need to do that?”
Without waiting for his response, you hopped onto the couch, positioning yourself over him. Heeseung’s breath hitched, eyes wide as you settled your weight on his hips, straddling him. The sudden proximity sent an electric shock through the air, making your heart race.
“Just hold still,” you said playfully, leaning down to press your forehead against his, your fingers gently brushing against his cheeks to gauge his temperature. “You’re warmer than usual, but I can’t tell if that’s from your so-called illness or if you’re just flustered.”
Heeseung swallowed hard, his cheeks turning a deeper shade of pink. “Maybe it’s a little bit of both…”
You chuckled softly, feeling a rush of exhilaration as your playful banter took on an undertone of tension. “I think we need a more accurate method.”
With a playful grin, you pulled back slightly and reached for the thermometer from your bag. As you turned back to face him, you couldn’t resist leaning in closer, teasingly bringing the thermometer up to his lips.
“Open up,” you instructed, a mischievous sparkle in your eyes.
Heeseung hesitated, glancing down at the thermometer, his expression shifting from playful to anxious. “Uh, are you really sure this is necessary?”
“Of course! How else am I supposed to know if you’re truly sick?” you replied, maintaining your teasing tone.
Finally, he relented, opening his mouth to take the thermometer. The moment it beeped, you pulled it away and glanced at the reading. “Looks like you’re slightly warm. But nothing I can’t fix.”
“Is that so?” Heeseung asked, his voice slightly shaky as he tried to maintain his composure beneath you. “Are you sure you want to be here?”
You nodded, a smirk playing on your lips. “Yes! A little TLC should do the trick. Now, let’s get you some soup and-”
Before you could finish your thought, he interrupted you, a sudden seriousness in his eyes. “Y/N, are you sure you’re not just doing this because you feel sorry for me?”
The question caught you off guard. You had been so wrapped up in the playful banter that you hadn’t fully considered the implications of your actions. “What do you mean?”
“I mean… I don’t want you to feel obligated to take care of me just because I’m ‘sick.’ If you’re here because you genuinely want to, then that’s one thing. But if it’s out of pity…” His voice trailed off, uncertainty clouding his expression.
You bit your lip, feeling a rush of warmth at his vulnerability. “Heeseung, I’m here because I want to be. I wouldn’t have come if I didn’t care about you.”
The tension between you two hung in the air, your heart racing at the honesty in your words. You could see the relief wash over his features, followed by a glimmer of something deeper, something that felt almost like hope.
“Really?” he asked, his voice softening.
“Yeah,” you replied, your gaze steady on his. “I like being here with you, even if you are pretending to be sick.”
Heeseung smiled shyly, his heart swelling with emotion. “Thanks, Y/N. That means a lot to me.”
With that, the playful atmosphere returned, but now it was layered with something more- an understanding, a connection that felt genuine and real. As you straddled him, the weight of your body pressed against his, sending a jolt of electric tension sparking through the air. Heeseung's breath hitched, confusion mingling with an undeniable desire swirling within him. The playful glint in your eyes ignited a fire in his chest, the warmth of your presence overwhelming in the most intoxicating way possible.
“Y/N, are you really sure about this?” he asked, his voice trembling slightly, as if afraid this intoxicating moment would shatter like glass at any moment.
“Absolutely,” you replied, a mischievous smirk curling your lips as you leaned closer, your breath teasingly brushing against his ear. “But first, let’s check your temperature.” The teasing lilt in your voice sent shivers cascading down his spine.
He hesitated, caught in a whirlwind of emotions that twisted and turned inside him. “I’m not really sick, though…” he mumbled, cheeks flushed and gaze flickering to the side, not wanting to admit how desperately he craved the closeness.
You let out a soft, playful laugh, brushing a loose strand of hair behind your ear. “Oh, come on, seungie. Let me take care of you.”
Before he could protest any further, you pressed your palm against his forehead, the heat radiating off him igniting a thrill in your veins. Heeseung gulped, feeling the weight of your gaze anchoring him in place, his mind racing as he struggled to focus. You could see the way he squirmed under your touch, his breath hitching at the slightest contact, his vulnerability only heightening your desire.
“You’re definitely warm,” you said, feigning seriousness, your thumb gently stroking his cheek, relishing the softness of his skin. “But I think we need to take this a step further.”
“What do you mean?” he asked, voice barely above a whisper, heart racing with anticipation and confusion, his breath coming in shallow gasps.
Without answering, you shifted slightly, sliding your hands down to his waist, locking your eyes onto his. “I need to get a better reading.” With that, you fully settled into his lap, your weight pressing him deeper into the plush couch. Heeseung’s breath hitched, eyes wide as he felt the intoxicating heat of your body against his.
“Y/N, wait—”
You leaned closer, fingers grazing the fabric of his shirt, teasingly close to where you knew he wanted you the most. “Just relax, Hee. Let me take care of you.”
He hesitated, heart pounding fiercely as you leaned in, capturing his lips in a teasing kiss. The softness of your lips against his ignited a fire within him, and he instinctively leaned into you, craving more. “This isn’t fair,” he murmured against your lips, the pull between you almost magnetic, trying to pull away but only finding himself drawn closer.
“Why not?” you countered, a sly smile playing on your lips, mischief dancing in your eyes. “You’re the one who looks like you need this the most.”
His cheeks burned at your words, heat pooling low in his stomach as he wrestled with his desire. “But I’m not-”
You cut him off with a sultry grind against him, the sudden friction causing him to gasp, a sharp intake of breath that echoed the conflict raging inside him. “Tell me you want this,” you whispered, your breath hot against his ear, your words dripping with seduction. “Tell me you want me.”
Heeseung’s resolve began to crumble under your teasing gaze, but he couldn’t give in that easily. “I want you, Y/N,” he confessed, the sincerity in his voice laced with a defiant edge. “But I want you to know that I’m not just some easy target.”
Your heart raced at his words, and you leaned in closer, lips brushing against his neck, leaving soft, lingering kisses along his skin. “Then let me take care of you, Heeseung. Just let go.”
He hesitated again, squeezing his eyes shut, fighting against the overwhelming sensations threatening to sweep him away. “I don’t know if I can just let go,” he admitted, voice thick with uncertainty, battling with the emotions swirling within him. “What if this is all a mistake?”
“Or,” you said playfully, pressing your lips to his neck, your voice sultry and inviting, “what if it’s the best mistake we ever make?” You pulled back just enough to meet his gaze, eyes glinting with mischief and lust. “You’re clearly enjoying this. I can feel how much you want me.”
Heeseung opened his mouth to argue, but the words slipped away as he felt the heat radiating between you. “I do want you, but-”
You cut him off again, leaning in to capture his lips with a hungry kiss, a challenge hanging in the air between you. “Then let me show you just how good it can be.”
Heeseung’s breath quickened, and the way you looked at him made his heart race even faster. “Fine,” he relented, determination lacing his voice as he leaned closer, breath hitching. “But I want to hear you beg for it first.”
Your eyes widened in surprise, but the challenge sent a thrill through your body. “Oh really? You think you can turn the tables on me?”
“Absolutely,” he replied, confidence returning as he leaned closer, his breath hot against your ear, teasingly intimate. “You want me? Show me how much.”
You felt a rush of excitement at his words, but you weren’t about to back down. “Alright then, Heeseung. I want you, and I want you to know that I’m not afraid to take what I want.”
His gaze darkened with lust, and he leaned in, his lips brushing against yours, a smirk playing on his face. “Then let’s see how far you’re willing to go. Beg for it, Y/N. Show me you want this.”
You felt a rush of excitement and defiance at his challenge, but you weren’t one to shy away. “I want you, Heeseung,” you said, your voice dripping with sultriness, “and I want you to give me everything you have.”
“Then let’s make this interesting,” he proposed, his gaze heavy with desire. “You want me to give you everything? Then show me just how much you’re willing to give in return.”
His challenge ignited a fire within you, and you knew you were in for a wild ride. You leaned in, capturing his lips again, this time with more urgency, and Heeseung responded, matching your fervor.
“Y/N,” he breathed between kisses, the air thick with longing. “I want you to know that I’m not going to make this easy for you. I want to see how much you can handle.”
“Bring it on,” you replied, your voice sultry and daring as you pressed your body against his, feeling the heat radiating between you.
As the heat between you surged, you pulled away slightly, your breath mingling in the charged air. Heeseung’s eyes were dark with desire, but beneath that lust, there was a flicker of uncertainty. “Y/N,” he murmured, voice low and gravelly, “are you really sure about this?”
You smirked, your gaze intense and unwavering. “I wouldn’t be here if I wasn’t. Just remember, I’m the one who takes charge.”
“Right,” he replied, a hint of bravado creeping into his tone, but the way his hands fumbled as they reached for you only added to the tension. “So what now?”
“Now,” you said, leaning in closer, letting your lips almost brush against his, “you’re going to show me just how much you want me.” The air crackled with anticipation, your heart racing.
With a burst of confidence, Heeseung grabbed your waist, but in his eagerness, he tugged too hard, sending you both tumbling onto the couch in a tangled mess of limbs. His glasses slipped down his nose, and he hurriedly adjusted them, cheeks flushed with a mix of desire and embarrassment.
“Smooth,” you teased, trying to stifle your laughter as you looked up at him. Heeseung’s expression shifted from flustered to determined as he leaned over you, his body hovering above yours, the heat radiating between you palpable.
“Let’s… try that again,” he said, voice shaky but filled with renewed resolve. His gaze roamed your body, taking in every curve, and you could practically see the fire igniting in him.
“Show me what you’ve got, Heeseung,” you urged, your voice sultry and inviting. His confidence wavered for a moment, but he leaned down, capturing your lips that sent shivers down your spine.
His kiss was a mix of passion and clumsiness, his movements a bit awkward as he tried to deepen the connection. You could feel him hesitate, and that uncertainty only fueled your desire. “You’re so cute when you’re trying to be confident,” you teased, pulling back just enough to lock eyes with him.
“Shut up,” he replied, attempting to sound gruff but failing as a nervous smile broke through. He leaned down again, this time his kisses were more insistent, laced with an intoxicating urgency.
As he pressed his body against yours, you felt the heat between you intensify. “You want this, don’t you?” you murmured, your breath hot against his lips.
“More than anything,” he breathed, his voice thick with need. Just as he leaned in for another kiss, his glasses slipped down again, and he fumbled to adjust them, frustration flickering across his face. “Ugh, why am I such a loser?”
You couldn’t help but laugh softly, the sound a heady mix of desire and mischief. “It’s part of your charm. Now, stop overthinking it and just kiss me.”
He nodded, visibly calming himself, and leaned in again, this time with a fierce intensity. He pushed his lips against yours, pouring all his eagerness and desire into the kiss, and you melted against him, surrendering to the moment.
Feeling emboldened, you moved your hands to the hem of his shirt, pushing it up to feel the warmth of his skin beneath your fingertips. Heeseung shivered at your touch, his breath hitching as you traced your fingers along the contours of his body.
“God, you’re so warm,” you murmured against his lips, your voice low and sultry. “You want me, huh?”
“I do,” he replied, voice thick with need, and leaned in, his kisses growing more fervent as he lost himself in you. He pressed his body against yours, the heat radiating off him intoxicating.
But just as he was getting lost in the moment, he accidentally bumped his head against your chin again, and both of you burst into laughter. “I swear I’m not this clumsy normally!” he exclaimed, rubbing the back of his head sheepishly.
“Who cares?” you replied, your tone dripping with seduction. “Just focus on making me feel good.” You pulled him closer, your lips brushing against his neck as you whispered, “Make me feel good.”
His gaze turned heated, a primal desire flickering in his eyes as he leaned in, kissing a trail down your neck. His lips were warm and soft against your skin, sending waves of pleasure coursing through you. “Y/N, you feel so good,” he murmured, voice thick with lust.
As he explored your body, you felt him beginning to lose himself in the sensations, the air thick with desire. Just when he seemed to find his rhythm, he accidentally brushed against your thigh with his knee, sending a shiver of excitement through you. “Sorry,” he mumbled, cheeks burning as he tried to regain his composure.
“Don’t apologize,” you whispered, capturing his chin with your fingers and forcing him to meet your gaze. “Just keep going.”
He leaned back in, the mix of confidence and nervousness fueling his desire. “Let me show you what I can do,” he said, voice low and commanding.
With newfound determination, Heeseung kissed a path lower, his lips trailing over your collarbone, hovering just above the swell of your breasts. “Is this okay?” he asked, his breath hot against your skin.
“Yes,” you urged, your heart racing with anticipation. “More. I want more, please seungie”
Encouraged by your response, he leaned in closer, his lips brushing against the fabric of your shirt, igniting a fire within you. His kisses were urgent now, fueled by the intensity of the moment, and you could feel the heat pooling between your thighs.
Heeseung’s gaze darkened with desire. The air was electric, thick with anticipation. “I want to eat your cunt” he growled, his voice low, the urgency unmistakable.
“Then do it,” you challenged, your voice sultry as you dared him to take control.
Without a word, Heeseung’s hands were on you, firm and eager. His fingers slid under the waistband of your shorts, and with one swift motion, he tugged them down, leaving you exposed before him. He tossed the fabric aside, eyes devouring the sight of you laid bare for him. His breath hitched as he knelt between your legs, his hands gripping your thighs possessively, pulling you closer.
“You’re going to feel so good,” he murmured, his voice rough with hunger as he leaned in.
With that, Heeseung dove in, his lips pressing against your core. His tongue flicked out, tasting you with the urgency of a man starved. The sensation made your body jolt, and a gasp escaped your lips as he licked you up like he couldn’t get enough.
“Fuck, you taste incredible,” he breathed, pausing only to glance up at you with an intense gaze, his glasses slipping low on his nose. The sight of him, desperate and determined, sent a fresh wave of heat through you. Heeseung's hands tightened on your thighs as he dove back in, licking and sucking with a fervor that made your head spin.
“More, Heeseung,” you moaned, your body trembling under his touch. “Please, don’t stop.”
“Quiet,” he growled, his voice filled with authority as he pulled you closer, burying his face between your legs. “Let me taste you.”
Heeseung’s tongue moved with more confidence now, sliding against you with a precision that left you breathless. He lapped at you eagerly, his hands gripping your thighs, holding you in place as he devoured you with a hunger that made your pulse race.
“Y/N,” he groaned against your folds, the vibration of his voice sending a shiver through your body. “You’re so fucking sweet.”
Heeseung was relentless, his tongue swirling and teasing in all the right places, his mouth claiming you as he drank you in. Your fingers tangled in his hair, pulling him closer, hips rocking against his face as you chased your release.
“Heeseung, yes,” you cried, feeling the tension build inside you, so close to the edge. “Don’t stop, please-”
“Then beg for it,” Heeseung murmured against your pussy, licking up to your clit and circling around it as his eyes locked onto yours. The intensity of his gaze sent shivers down your spine, igniting the fire within you.
“Please, Heeseung,” you gasped, your voice a desperate whisper. “I need more. I need your tongue on me.”
A wicked grin spread across his face, and he continued his teasing motions, his tongue swirling around your sensitive bud. “That’s better,” he said, his voice low and husky. “Keep going.”
You felt a rush of heat flooding your cheeks, but the overwhelming pleasure drowned out any embarrassment. “Ngh~ please,” you pleaded, hips rocking instinctively against his mouth. “I can’t hold on much longer.”
With each lick and gentle suck, Heeseung was relentless, pushing you closer to the brink. “I want to hear you say it,” he coaxed, his breath hot against you.
“Please, Heeseung,” you whimpered, fingers tangling in his hair, urging him closer. “I want to come. Make me come, please.”
“Good girl,” he murmured, diving back in with intensity, his tongue working magic as he teased you relentlessly. The tension inside you coiled tighter, ready to snap as he continued his lewd actions.
With a low growl, Heeseung sucked harder, his tongue pushing you to the brink. “Come for me,” he demanded, his voice thick with lust. “I want to taste you.”
With one final flick of his tongue, the pressure snapped, and you came undone, crying out his name as waves of pleasure washed over you. Heeseung kept his mouth on you, lapping up every drop of your release, his eyes locked on yours, filled with raw desire and satisfaction.
When you finally collapsed back, trembling and breathless, Heeseung pulled back, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand, his lips curling into a cocky grin. “That was even better than I imagined,” he said, his voice dark and dripping with pride. “You taste fucking amazing.”
As you caught your breath, Heeseung’s gaze locked onto yours, the heat between you still simmering, charged with the energy of your earlier exploration. The grin on his face was a tantalizing mix of satisfaction and insatiable hunger, his glasses slightly fogged from the heat of the moment, giving him an adorably flustered look that only heightened your desire.
“You’re incredible,” he breathed, his voice low and husky, leaning closer until your foreheads touched, sharing the same intoxicating warmth.
You smiled, emboldened by his praise, feeling the rush of adrenaline coursing through you. “You’re not so bad yourself,” you teased, your voice dripping with sultriness as you leaned in to capture his lips in a heated kiss. The taste of yourself lingered on his mouth, mingling with the sweet flavor of desire, and you deepened the kiss, pouring all your pent-up passion into it. The sensation of his warm breath against your skin sent shivers down your spine, igniting an unquenchable fire within you.
Heeseung responded instantly, his hands finding your waist again, pulling you closer until there was no space left between your bodies. The kiss was intoxicating, a heady mix of urgency and longing, as if you both were trying to consume each other entirely. His tongue slipped into your mouth, teasing and exploring, igniting a blaze deep within you that made your body ache for more.
“Y/N,” he murmured against your lips, pulling back just enough to meet your gaze, his eyes dark with need and a look of pure love that made your heart race. “I want you.”
“Then take me,” you urged, your voice sultry and low, your heart racing at the prospect. “I’m all yours.”
His expression shifted to one of determination as he captured your lips again, kissing you with a raw intensity that left you breathless, your senses heightened. He pushed you back against the couch, his hands roaming your body with feverish need, exploring every curve, every contour. You could feel his heart pounding against you, a reminder of the electricity crackling between you.
Heeseung's hands slid down your body, grasping your thighs and lifting them to wrap around his waist. “I’ve thought about this,” he confessed, his breath hot against your skin, sending goosebumps cascading across your body. “Thought about how you’d feel wrapped around me.”
“Then let’s make it happen,” you urged, your voice thick with lust as you ground against him, feeling the unmistakable hardness pressing against you. The sheer weight of his cock sent a thrill of excitement coursing through your veins. Who knew a nerd like him could possess such size? A flicker of uncertainty crossed your mind, would he even fit inside you?
With a swift movement, Heeseung adjusted your bodies, positioning himself at your entrance. He paused, looking deep into your eyes, searching for any hesitation. “Are you sure?”
You nodded, breathless, your body aching for him. “I want this, Heeseung. I need you.”
His lips curled into a smirk, a mixture of pride and mischief in his gaze. “Good,” he said, his voice a sultry whisper, before thrusting into you with one powerful movement. The sensation was overwhelming, stretching you perfectly as you gasped at the intensity, your body arching into him instinctively.
“God, you feel amazing,” he groaned, his voice low and raspy, filled with unfiltered desire. The sheer size of him filled you up in ways you hadn’t imagined, igniting a fire within you that drove you wild. You could feel the distinct bulge of his cock in your stomach, a constant reminder of just how much he had to offer. Heeseung had spent countless hours lost in wet dreams and endless scrolls through porn sites, but nothing could compare to this- a real connection, real pleasure that felt as if it was lifting you to new heights.
“Fuck, you’re so big,” you gasped, your eyes rolling back as he continued to thrust, each movement sending waves of pleasure coursing through you. His cock stretched you to your limits, filling you completely and making you feel utterly owned.
“Yeah? You like that?” he asked, a smirk playing on his lips as he looked down at where you were connected, watching the way his cock disappeared inside you. “You’re taking me so well.”
The weight of his cock stretching you made you feel desperate, a primal urge to be filled completely. “More,” you breathed, your body begging for him to give you everything he had. You could feel your body tightening around him, urging him on, craving his every thrust.
Heeseung’s expression shifted to one of pure determination as he picked up the pace. The sound of skin against skin filled the air, each thrust pushing you deeper into bliss. “You’re so perfect for me, Y/N,” he murmured, voice thick with lust and admiration. “I’ve wanted this for so long.”
“Then don’t stop,” you cried out, feeling the heat coiling in your core. “I’m so close.”
In a moment of playful mischief, you reached up and adjusted his foggy glasses, clearing his view just as his eyes widened in shock and lust. The sight of you, glistening with desire and slightly breathless, made his breath hitch. With a feral growl, he thrust harder, his need intensifying as he chased your shared pleasure.
“Me too,” he groaned, pushing harder, chasing his own release. With every thrust, he buried himself deeper, the overwhelming sensation of his size driving you both closer to the edge, the bulge in your stomach becoming more pronounced with each powerful movement.
With one final powerful thrust, he hit that sweet spot, and the pleasure consumed you both, washing over you like a tidal wave. You felt the tension in your body peak, and as you cried out his name, your orgasm crashed over you, waves of ecstasy washing over you.
“Y/N!” he shouted, feeling you tighten around him, and with one final thrust, he spilled into you, warmth flooding your core as he filled you completely. You could feel the delicious warmth of his release spreading inside you, a sensation that sent shockwaves of ecstasy coursing through your body. The way his cock pulsed inside you made you feel completely full, satisfied in every sense.
You both fell into a panting mess, bodies entwined, the world outside fading away. Heeseung collapsed beside you, breathless but with a satisfied smile playing on his lips, his glasses slightly askew and still fogged from the intensity of your connection.
“Fuck,” he murmured, turning to look at you, his expression a mix of awe and disbelief. “That was… amazing.”
You grinned back, feeling a warmth spread through your chest at the connection you’d just forged. “Yeah, it really was. And I didn’t know you were this big.”
He chuckled softly, a hint of pride shining through his eyes, still full of love and admiration. “Guess I have some advantages.”
You laughed, feeling your heart swell at the moment shared between you, an intimate secret you would carry together. “Definitely an advantage.”
As you both began to come down from the high of your shared ecstasy, Heeseung pulled you close, his fingers gently brushing through your hair.. You could feel his heartbeat against your chest, a steady reminder of the intensity you had just shared. Your heart felt giddy as you looked at him, his hair tousled and his glasses almost fogged up again from the heat of the moment.
“Let’s clean up before Jungwon gets here,” Heeseung suggested, his voice still slightly breathless but laced with affection as he leaned down to place a tender kiss on your forehead.
You nodded, smiling softly as you helped him untangle yourselves from each other, the lingering warmth of his body still radiating against yours. Adjusting your clothes, you felt a mix of giddiness and satisfaction at the shared intimacy.
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Unbeknownst to you both, Jungwon had arrived just moments earlier. He stood just outside the door, the sound of loud moans and passionate cries echoing through the hallway. His face flushed a deep crimson as the realization of what he was hearing hit him like a wave. He blinked in disbelief, blood pulsing to his cock as he listened to his best friend finally manage to fuck.
“Lucky idiot,” he muttered under his breath, a mix of envy and amusement swirling within him. Shaking his head, he turned away from the door, his mind racing with thoughts and images he couldn’t shake. With a silent, careful motion, he closed the door, trying to ignore the lingering sounds of pleasure that filled the air.
As he walked up to his room, Jungwon knew he’d definitely be taking care of himself tonight, the vivid sounds of your shared bliss echoing in his mind as he settled in for a long, private session of his own.
1K notes · View notes
gothgoblinbabe · 4 months ago
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The Art Of Make-believe Matrimony (pt.2)
Logan Howlett x fem!reader
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Warnings: NSFW 18+, unprotected sex (wrap it before you tap it), fem reader, soft dom!Logan, good ol’ face sittin’, sloppy oral (m receiving), swearing, use of pet names - babydoll, sweetheart, pretty girl - teeth rottingly sweet fluff, emotional(?) sex, mild angst, i think thats it but if there’s any more pls lmk!
Read pt.1 here
Summary: part 2 is finally here! I’ll be honest i think the majority of it is smut, but if you’re not interested in reading that, you can stop at the point where you and Logan drive home from the restaurant :) <3 this is probably the most detailed nsfw thing i’ve ever written so it’s a lil’ longer than what i’d usually write for smut but I really wanted to deliver on this one.
Taglist: @deardo11 @pastelpinkflowerlife @joyfulpeanutsalad @jonesem11 @carollinnasic @likeficsinthewnd @mrs-ephemeral 
Word Count: 9.5K
divider credit here and here
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It had been about a month since the whole ordeal with Logan - the exchanging of fake rings, sweet nicknames and kissing in the driveway - and to everyone else, it seemed like nothing had changed.
You’d still taunt each other during training, bicker over the small things and butt heads on almost everything, but it was all accompanied by stolen kisses in empty hallways, nights on the roof spent stargazing and small, sweet moments in between. You were going to come out with it - tell the team what had been going on behind closed doors - but truthfully, you were both fearful of the possible outcomes. What if this didn’t work out? What, you’d go back to hating each other - for real this time? So you kept it hushed, intending to give the new ‘relationship’ - a word neither of you used, yet - a sort of trial run. Neither of you admitted it aloud but you knew this way, if it really wasn’t meant to be, it could save you the embarrassment of admitting you were both wrong.
As the days went on, though, it became harder for either of you to keep up the act and even more difficult to keep your secret. You came close to being caught more often, having to stutter out an excuse each time. Jean and Ororo still knew what was going on - having been the ones to greet you in the hall when you’d gotten back from that dinner party - but gave you their word that it would stay a secret. The former of the two even feigned surprise when Scott mentioned he thought he saw you nearly kiss Logan in the kitchen, insisting he must've been seeing things.
You’d been washing some dishes and handing them off to him to dry and put away, both of you alone in the kitchen after dinner. 
“Hey, do you wanna come up to my room in a little bit? Maybe watch a movie?” he offered in a low voice, standing so close that your arms touched.
Neither of you had actually had the chance to be alone like that yet and the idea made your stomach erupt in butterflies.
“Hm - If I didn’t know any better, Logan,” you chuckled, “I’d think you have some ulterior motive.”
“And If I did?”
Your cheeks hurt from smiling and you rolled your eyes.
“C’mon,” he cooed, “what do you think?”
You were looking up at him, your noses inches apart as he leaned down further. One of his hands came to rest on your lower back.
“Hey, guys, have you seen my - “
Scott’s voice echoed through the kitchen and you both jumped, Logan trying to put distance between you and nearly tripping over his feet in the process. He cleared his throat and rubbed the back of his neck and you kept your eyes glued to the dishes in the sink.
“Uh,” Scott tilted his head, “have you guys…seen my phone?”
“Nope,” Logan was quick to reply, drying and putting away dishes now like it was his job.
“Um, no - sorry,” you shook your head.
“Hm…okay,” Scott mumbled, clearly suspicious of whatever it was he’d just seen. You both exchanged a look of panic when he left the room.
“That was close,” you huffed, returning to the task at hand.
“Yeah,” he agreed, “and he’s probably the last one we want to find out - Summers is a blabber mouth.”
You knew exactly what he meant. If you told Scott anything, he couldn’t keep it to himself. One time Jean had tried to plan a surprise party for your birthday and you already knew about it before she could even pick the decorations.
Jean and Ororo had thankfully kept their word, though. It was damn near torture for them to keep from shouting the truth aloud every time you got into your usual spats. The sly jokes, however, were another story.
“Will you two just kiss already?” Jean had blurted when you were pelting each other with beanbags during an outdoor game of cornhole. 
Ororo wasn’t any better. 
She was sitting next to you at dinner one night, Logan across from you. Everyone was chatting about their days or telling stories and she volunteered you to share.
“Anything new happening with you? You seem extra happy lately,” she was grinning.
Your eyes darted to Logan and then back to her, taking a deep inhale.
“Uh, nothin’ - nothin’ new,” you swallowed, "just happy.”
Logan was smiling to himself, his gaze focused on his dinner.
After everyone had finished dinner and vanished off to their rooms, he stopped you at the bottom of the staircase.
“Hey,” he nervously scanned the hallway while gnawing on his bottom lip, “can you meet me in the garden out back in fifteen minutes? I wanna show you somethin’.”
“Sure,” you nodded, “but the ‘something’ better not be beef jerky and a picnic blanket - which, by the way, is not a date.”
He clicked his tongue and rolled his eyes, a contradiction to the smile tugging at his lips.
“That was one damn time - you’re still mad about that?”
“Eh - not really, but I am gonna mention it in every argument we will ever have,” you joked.
“Oh, shut up, ya’ brat.”
 You giggled and he beamed at the sound, already undeniably smitten with you. He’d never been so sure of any other feeling in his life. Your serene voice, your perfect hair, the smell of your perfume, the way you walked, the way you laughed and smiled - it was all things he’d taken notice of before but chose to bury within himself, terrified of whatever it was that had given you so much power over him. 
Set on trying to impress you, he’d gone around the garden that morning and picked a couple flowers out of each different plant he saw. He felt a little ridiculous - his six foot frame and two hundred pound body towering over a bed of tulips and daffodils - but he reminded himself this was for you; to see that smile on your face that could bring him to his knees. He had fallen for you and he fell fast. He didn’t know when he’d truly realized it - maybe during one of your midnight conversations or during one of the movie nights when you made yourself comfortable under his arm - but it was a feeling so intense that he’d never experienced anything like it before. He’d never had that ache in his chest, the pain of wanting someone so badly that it physically hurts; the twisting feeling in the pit of his stomach when he thought of losing you, the way the thump of his heartbeat became so much louder and faster when he caught even a glimpse of you. Weeks ago, he probably would’ve made fun of the poor sap who was acting just as he was - like a lovesick dog on your leash - but he found himself finally starting to embrace the idea that there was someone for him in the way there was for Jean and Scott or Marie and Bobby. Maybe it wasn’t all permanent - nothing ever was - but whatever connection he had developed with you was one of the only things that he thought of first thing in the morning and right before he went to bed at night.
After what felt like the longest fifteen minutes of your life, you made your way outside and to the well kept garden. You admired every variation of flower in bloom while you walked, taking in the peaceful atmosphere of the garden in the moonlight. You planted yourself in the middle of the extensive displays of flora, nervously rocking back and forth on your heels. You scanned the landscape and that’s when you spotted him. 
Logan was making his way towards you and even through the darkness, you could see the bright arrangement of flowers held in his hands. Your heart felt like it swelled so much with adoration that it was going to burst. He’d done this for you, went out and handpicked every flower. Receiving so much affection from him was unusual, in a good way. Recently, he’d absentmindedly begun holding your hand in his at times, talking away while his fingers intertwined with yours like it was second nature. He’d play with your hair, kiss your cheek, embrace you from behind, even pull you onto his lap so you could nuzzle into his chest. Even when you weren’t alone, he was having trouble keeping himself off of you. He’d place a guiding hand on the small of your back or let his touch linger when your fingers brushed up against each other - small things, almost unnoticeable. It was a stark contrast to his behavior weeks before and you couldn’t have been happier. 
“These are for you,” Logan held the bouquet in front of you, pointing at some of the bulbs, “a couple of ‘em might be a little bent - I may have accidentally yanked ‘em out of the ground with more force than I needed to.”
You were beaming, your hands on your cheeks in excitement and surprise.  You delicately took the arrangement of flowers from him, admiring the beautiful ribbon that kept them together. Jean had helped with that, of course.
“Oh, Logan,” you pouted, “these are beautiful!”
“I wanted to give you somethin’ nice, y’know - after being such an asshole for so long,” he shoved his hands in his pockets. 
You knitted your eyebrows, “you didn’t have to, you know.”
He shook his head, waving a hand dismissively, “c’mon, none of that, princess. You deserve ‘em.”
Your heart felt like it would jump out of your chest whenever he’d call you sweet names. He’d called you princess before, sure, but only to tease you. The way he said it now was affectionate, as if to say you really were a princess in his eyes. You were head over heels for him already but you held your tongue, fearful that it was far too soon to admit something like that. The last thing you wanted to do was drive him away and lose the only relationship you’d had in years that made you absolutely lovesick to the point of losing sleep.
“I wanted to, uh - I wanted to tell you something, too,” he began, resting his hands on your waist. He seemed a little nervous with his bottom lip tucked between his teeth.
“So, tell me,” you smiled up at him. You’d be lying if you said you weren't a little nervous yourself, picking up on his hesitation.
He cleared his throat and took a deep breath, standing up straight and keeping his eyes trained on yours.
“I love you.”
You only blinked in response, lips parted in surprise.
“You don’t have to say it back if you don’t - “
“I love you - I love you, too.”
It was like letting go after holding your breath for so long, a sense of relief that couldn’t compare to anything else.
A wide grin crept onto his face, one he couldn’t hold back even if he tried. Your expression mirrored his - complete adoration for one another.
He was staring down at you the same way he had during dinner that night you first kissed. You’d wondered since then what it was, what made his pupils dilate when his eyes focused on yours or why he would tuck his lip between his teeth. You knew now that it was love.
“It’s gonna be even harder now to keep this - us - a secret,” he mumbled in a low voice. He brought his hand up to tuck a strand of hair behind your ear. He cupped your cheek after, unable to keep his hands off you.
“Well,” you bit the inside of your cheek, “we could tell them? Tell everyone, I mean.”
“Do you think you’re ready? I mean - not that I'm not ready, but I don't want you to feel rushed into anything.”
Your knees could’ve buckled right then and there at how truly sweet he was with you. You took his words into consideration and had a realization.
“We haven’t even really figured out what we are yet. What would we tell them?”
He nodded solemnly, grazing his thumb over your cheekbone, “Yeah, you’re right.”
You hoped this would be it - this would be the moment he finally told you that you were his girlfriend, you were something - but he gave a small smile and dropped his hand from your face.
“It’s getting late, we should get back before anyone notices we’re gone.”
You simply nodded, clearing your throat to replace the exasperated sigh you were about to let out.
You followed him on the way back, mind racing for the entirety of the short walk and drowning out anything Logan was saying. You wondered if he’d ever ask you that one question at all. Maybe he’d said he loved you to keep you hanging on, wrapped around his finger. Maybe it was meant to be casual and you’d misunderstood. 
But there was a bouquet of flowers in your hands. You’d fallen asleep on his chest more times than you could count, held hands at any moment you could and he did just tell you he loved you. So, maybe he did mean it.
As you snuck down the hallway to your bedroom with the arrangement of flowers, you wondered how long you’d have to keep this a secret.
Unbeknownst to you, it wouldn't be much longer.
It all came to a head when the team decided to go out to dinner together, settling on some chain restaurant. You’d coincidentally ended up next to Logan in the large booth, the both of you on the very end of the table. You were all reading from the menus and Marie piped up from across the table.
“Honey, do you wanna switch seats?”
She was talking to you. You didn't look up from the laminated paper in your hands, responding automatically without a second thought.
“Nah, I'm fine.”
She furrowed her eyebrows in confusion and looked at Bobby, who only shrugged. You two never sat next to each other, usually bickering so intensely that you’d be asked to shut up or leave the table. 
The unusual interaction was soon forgotten when your drinks were brought over, the waitress placing them in front of each of you. She was pretty and her long hair was pulled back into a ponytail. Logan being on the very end made him the closest in proximity to her and you being so close meant that you could hear her hushed voice when she leaned down before she walked away.
“And here, this is for you.”
She slid a napkin onto the table, your eyes automatically drawn to the movement. There was a clear phone number written in ink, her name scribbled underneath next to a smiley face.
Everyone at the table had noticed the interaction and waited for Logan to speak after she walked away. Instead, they watched in curiosity as he silently slid the napkin under his drink, the ink bleeding immediately from the condensation on the outside of his glass.
“Okay, what's up with you?” Scott questioned from across the table.
Logan raised his eyebrows, “I don’t know, what's up with you?”
“I asked you first.”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
Marie chimed in then, leaning forward with her elbows on the table to interrogate him, “you always take girls’ numbers when they give ‘em to you. Why not hers?”
He shrugged, “just not interested.”
“I call bullshit.”
“Watch the language, kid.”
“Whatever, you’re so full of it!”
You pretended to be uninterested in the conversation, folding your napkin into unrecognizable shapes. 
“You know what? I think you might be in love,” she giggled, “you’ve been way too happy lately. Like, absurdly happy.”
You froze in place, gwaning on your bottom lip. 
It was true, though. He was waking up early, smiling more, making more jokes that weren’t at Scott’s expense - they really had never seen him so happy.
“Um,” he hesitated for a second when you stole a glance at him. He was smiling to himself already.
“I guess you could say that.”
Everyone turned to stare at him in mild disbelief, including you.
“What? I was just kidding! Oh my god, you didn’t tell us?” Marie exclaimed, “spill it!”
Jean and Ororo were smiling wide behind their hands and exchanging knowing looks.
“Well, she’s real pretty,” he started, “and she’s sweet.”
You were trying so hard to fight a smile, covering your mouth with your fist as you leaned an elbow on the table.
“I never thought i’d hear you talk about someone like that,” Marie knitted her eyebrows and stuck out her bottom lip - the kind of face you’d make when a kid confesses their first crush.
Logan rolled his eyes and scoffed, a grin stuck on his face. Marie was still asking questions, determined to not let the topic go till she knew every detail.
“Is she your girlfriend?”
Logan was nervously chewing on the inside of his cheek. He looked like he was thinking of an answer.
“Uh… I don’t know. I haven’t really asked her.”
You must have been pink all the way to the tips of your ears. You brought your glass of water to your lips, hoping it would help cool your face. 
“Why not?”
Marie was really not gonna let this go and you dreaded to hear the answer come out of his mouth.
Logan sighed, picking at the skin around his fingernails as a nervous habit.
“Just a little nervous, I guess. I don’t wanna screw it up.”
“A girl that makes you nervous? When do we get to meet her?” 
Your eyes were stuck on the wood grain of the table, both of your hands covering half your face at this point.
“When the time is right,” he responded, taking a sip of his drink.
Ororo rolled her eyes.
You’d all finished eating a good while later and the check came. After you’d both put cash down, he mumbled under his breath with his hand shielding his mouth.
“Meet me outside in a second, okay?”
He slipped out of his seat and you watched him disappear around the corner.
No one had noticed him leave his seat, too engrossed in conversation. After a minute or two, you muttered something about using the bathroom before you left the table and swiftly made your way back to the entrance you had come in through. It was starting to rain a little, barely drizzling.
Logan was standing in the parking lot with his hands shoved into his jacket pockets. He beckoned you over when he saw you, taking your hand in his and leading you to a spot outside that wasn’t directly in front of the door. His nose was starting to turn pink from the cold evening air and your cheeks were doing the same.
“So,” he swallowed hard, brushing his thumb over your knuckles, “I guess it’s about time I asked you, huh?”
“Ask me what?’
You were smiling so wide that your face ached. You knew exactly what, but of course you wanted to hear him say it.
His expression mirrored yours and he let go of one of your hands so he could cup your face.
“Would you be my girl?”
It may have been a little juvenile - the teasing, the hiding, the avoidance of labeling what you had - but it had worked.
“I already am,” you told him, leaning up to plant a kiss on his lips. He happily reciprocated, wrapping his arms around your waist to pull you even closer.
If either of you had taken a second to look around you first , you would’ve spotted the rest of the team turning the corner the second you kissed him. 
“No way!”
Marie’s squeal echoed through the parking lot and both of you jumped, turning towards the sound. You both stood in stunned silence, Logan’s arms still locked around your waist.
“Uh…” He was like a deer in headlights.
“I should’ve guessed,” Scott clicked his tongue, irritated that he hadn’t figured you out sooner.
“Guessed what? We’re - uh, we were just - “ Logan shot you a look, hoping you’d be able to think of something on the spot - even with his arms still locked around you. You could’ve squirmed out of his hold, made some unconvincing excuse about having something in your eye and needing his help. You almost did. Looking up at him, his features highlighted by the flood lights that illuminated the nearly empty lot and his cheeks peppered in rain drops, you had a realization. You didn’t want to lie. You didn’t feel the need to anymore. You weren’t afraid it wasn’t going to work or that you might be better off as enemies rather than lovers. Everything felt like it was finally right - as if every piece of your life finally fit into its perfect place. If you were wrong - fuck it. You’d deal with the consequences later if you had to. 
“Kissing. We were kissing - we’re dating,” you sputtered out to your friends, looking back to Logan after. You almost expected him to be embarrassed, to tell you to keep your mouth shut.
 But he was smiling. He was smiling wider than you’d probably ever seen. He leaned his head down to kiss your forehead affectionately, mumbling into your hair, “I guess the cat’s out of the bag now, huh?”
You hummed in affirmation and peeked back at everyone else. 
“How? Since when? Oh my god, I need to know everything,” Marie was as giddy as could be, nearly jumping up and down.
“Since they went on that mission where they had to pretend to be married,” Ororo piped up, “they liked pretending a little too much.”
You all began walking to the two cars you came in, Logan’s arm draped around your shoulders. He was holding you so close that you were practically stepping on his boots.
“Aw,” you heard Marie whisper to Bobby from behind you, “they’re so sweet together.”
“Now that they're not trying to kill each other? Yeah,” he replied with a small laugh.
“I thought you guys hated each other,” Scott said, “what happened?
“Well,” you smiled to yourself, “he’s a good fake husband, so I figured he might make an alright boyfriend.”
You stopped when you approached the car and Logan wrapped you into a tight embrace, your face smushed against his chest. You giggled into his shirt until he finally let you go.
“How’d you guys even keep it under wraps anyway?” Scott asked.
You looked up to Logan, “Willpower?”
He chuckled, “I don’t know, really,” he rested his hands at your waist, “I guess we got lucky that you guys aren’t too bright.”
Ororo lightly smacked the back of his shoulder, rolling her eyes but holding a smile on her face.
You all piled into the cars you’d came in - you, Logan, Marie and Bobby in one and Jean, Scott and Ororo in another - and made your way home. Logan drove and you sat beside him, his hand in yours for most of the ride.
When you all got home and everyone went off to their rooms, Logan stopped you with a gentle grip on your wrist.
“Would you, um,” he looked to the floor for a moment, biting back a smile, “would you maybe want to spend the night in my room?”
You and Logan had been alone together a handful of times, but never like that - in his bedroom. The thought made your palms start to sweat. It wasn’t that you hadn’t thought of it - you’d been together about a month now and every time you’d gotten the chance to make out, you usually didn’t have an opportunity to go any further. Someone would call your name, Logan’s phone would ring, you’d hear footsteps - always something to pull you apart. It was torture, knowing you could kiss him till his hands started to creep up your shirt or your hand rested on his belt buckle but never actually get to go any further.
“We don’t have to do anything but sleep,” Logan could see the hesitation in your expression, “whatever you’re comfortable with.”
“I’d love to,” you replied, letting him take your hand in his and lead you down the hall. 
“How about this - I'll change into pajamas in my room, you can change in yours and then come down,” he swiped his thumb over your knuckles, “is that alright?”
You almost wanted to insist you could change in his room - let him see you bare in front of him like you wanted for weeks - but you simply nodded and slipped your hand from his grasp as you walked the short distance to your room. After changing into a tank top and pajama shorts, you shuffled up to his door in your slippers and gave a small knock.
He answered in an instant, wearing sweatpants and his usual white beater. You unintentionally let out a sigh, eyes immediately scanning over his muscular torso under the thin white fabric. 
Christ, he’s hot.
“Everything alright, pumpkin’?”
It didn’t help that he was so damn sweet to you.
“Huh? Uh - yeah, I just,” you stopped, realizing there wasn’t much of a need for an excuse, “I like the way you look in that.”
You boldly reached out to playfully tug the hem. He smiled and used your hand on him to pull you out of the hallway and into his room, wrapping you in his arms. 
“Yeah?” He said softly, kissing your cheek and forehead before finally meeting your lips, “I like the way you look in these.”
His hand slid down to the hem of your shorts, hiking them up a little to squeeze your upper thigh.
You giggled, a blush forming across your cheeks.
“And you’re so damn cute,” he led you to his bed, laying down and patting the spot next to him, “c’mere, sweetheart.”
Still, even after all those weeks, the pet names made you feel weak in the knees.
You obeyed instantly, crawling onto the mattress and snuggling up next to him. You rested your head on his chest and listened to his heartbeat, steady and strong. 
Logan had a mirror across the room, coincidentally angled so that, from where you were, you could both see your reflection. He was playing with your hair when he began to stare at your reflection, smiling to himself.
“What?” You interrogated, looking up at him and then back to the mirror.
“We look good together,” he admitted, “well, you look good.”
You clicked your tongue, “are you kidding? Please, girls practically throw themselves at you.”
“Well, there’s only one girl I ever really wanted to throw herself at me.”
“I think you got your wish.”
You still had that spark - the back and forth quips and competitive nature - except that it was always something sweet now.
“I love you, a lot,” he muttered into the top of your head, pulling you as close as you could lay to him with your leg slung over his thighs.
“I love you too, Logan,” you smiled into his shirt, taking in the smell of him.
His hand came to rest on your thigh, gently kneading and squeezing. You already felt your breath quicken and heart start to race again as his fingertips traced the hem of your shorts. 
“Like I said,” he cooed, having picked up on your rapid heartbeat, “we don’t have to do anything you don’t want to.”
Staring up at him, his large hand still kneading your upper thigh, you’d decided - just like in the parking lot earlier - you’d had enough of holding back. You swiftly brought yourself further on top of him, straddling his lap with your knees on either side. You didn’t give him time to protest as you cupped his face and kissed him in a slow mess of tongues and teeth, savoring the feeling of finally having him beneath you. It wasn’t long before his hands found home on your thighs, his fingers already slotting beneath the fabric of your shorts. He then slid his hands up to squeeze your ass, pushing you even further into him while your tongue explored the inside of his mouth. When you finally pushed yourself up with your hands on his chest, he almost looked dazed. 
“I wouldn’t start somethin’ you can’t finish,” he panted, his tongue peeking out to wet his lips.
“Oh, I think I’ll finish,” you joked, raising your eyebrows at the innuendo. 
“Yeah? I know you will.”
You squealed and giggled when he flipped you on your back, climbing over you and caging you in with his forearms on either side of your head. 
“Been wantin’ to get my hands on you like this forever, you know,” he continued with a wicked smile, peppering kisses from your jaw to your collarbone, “thinkin’ about you.”
“W-What were you thinking about?” you managed to stutter out, eyes nearly rolling into the back of your head when he began to lightly suck and bite at your warm skin.
“Having you here, in my bed. Getting to undress you, having your thighs ‘round my head.”
You nearly choked on your saliva at the filthy way he was mumbling against your skin and squeezing your hips.
“Me too,” was all you could say, lost in the feeling of his hands now sliding under your tank top, resting right below your tits.
“ ‘s that what you thought about?”
You can tell he wanted you to say it, let him know just how bad you wanted him.
“I thought about being in your bed, sitting on your lap,” you took a deep breath, “and having you - having you, uh…”
Your sentence trailed off, cheeks tinted pink.
“What, sweetheart? C’mon, don’t be shy. What do you want me to do, huh?”
He still knew how to tease you, even if it wasn’t out of spite anymore. 
“Fuck,” you swallowed audibly, “want you to eat me out, fuck me - anything.”
You sounded desperate and you knew it. You really didn’t care, too engrossed in everything about him to even consider it. 
“Really?”
Your eyes met his, filled with lust and ambition to please you any way you wanted. His lips were parted in surprise when he first heard your words, slowly turning into a devious smile.
“Please.”
That was all he needed to trail his lips down your shoulders, gently pushing the straps of your tank top down. He sat up to let you pull it off and if he wasn’t already set on worshiping you, he definitely was now.
You’d yanked the garment over your head and onto the floor, revealing your bare chest. 
Logan groaned, laying you back down and almost immediately latching his lips onto the newly exposed and incredibly soft skin. 
“So beautiful,” he mumbled against you as he took one of your nipples in his mouth, swirling his tongue.
“Oh my god,” you huffed quietly, arching your back to push yourself even further into him.
He was trying to hold back a smug grin, switching between each breast, sucking and biting gently.
“ ‘s good, baby?”
You were lost for words, even more so when you could see the string of spit that connected his mouth to one of your tits.
“Mm-hm,” you hummed, your fingers having found their home in Logan’s hair. 
You whined when he pulled his mouth from you with an audible pop.
“Words, sweetheart,” he told you, his eyes glued to yours while he licked his own spit off his lips. 
“”Fuck, yes, yes -“
You were cut off by your own moan, gasping when you felt the pressure of his thigh in between yours. He slid his hands down your body to grab your ass in an attempt to grind you down on his leg.
“I like it when you make those noises for me,” he muttered into your chest, his hands still kneading your ass when he pulled you forwards.
You wanted him for so long that the reality of being with him had made you over sensitive to his touch. Even through the fabric of your panties and shorts, the feeling was intoxicating.
You were practically whining as he ground you down so hard that you were soaked all the way through your shorts and panties, the fabric of both sliding to the side.
“Fuck, you’re so wet already,” he chuckled a little, feeling the soaked patch on his sweatpants, “all for me?”
You hummed, hands tugging at his hair, “for-for you.”
His hands came around to the front of your shorts, his fingers hooking onto the fabric.
“Can I take these off you?”
“Please,” you responded immediately, already lifting your hips off the bed so he could drag your shorts down your legs. 
When he turned to throw them somewhere on the floor, he caught a glimpse of your reflection in the mirror. Your chest was heaving and your hair was all over the place from rolling around in the bed. He could see that you were still looking up at him, even when he was turned away.
“I got an idea, scoot up a bit,” he told you suddenly when he turned back to face you. You moved forward on the mattress as he momentarily stood up, stripping himself of his beater. He sat behind you and arranged himself so that he was holding your back against his chest with his arms around your waist, his legs spread out so you could lay between them.
You instantly caught sight of your reflection in the mirror. Your head was leaned back on his shoulder and he planted delicate kisses down your neck.
“ ‘s that why you wanted to sit like this?” you nodded weakly in the direction of the mirror, your eyes nearly fluttering close when he slid one of his hands to rest on the inside of your thigh.
“You look real pretty, I wanna see all of you,” he explained, his middle finger grazing your cunt through your damp panties.
Your eyes were glued to your reflection - your legs spread with his hand between them and purple hickies darkening on your chest. Logan was staring at your reflection too, his mouth still working on your neck.
“Look at you, all spread out for me,” he mumbled into your ear, “so fucking gorgeous.”
You couldn’t help the moan that escaped your lips. If he kept saying all those filthy things, it wasn't going to take long before you were coming apart in his arms.
You shivered when his fingers hooked around the wet crotch of your underwear and moved it to the side.
You could hear him swear under his breath from behind you, his fingers barely grazing your heat.
“God, Logan,” you were squirming, trying to push your hips towards his hand, “you’re gonna make me beg?”
You could see him smirk into your shoulder in the mirror, “you know what?”
He moved his hands to drag your panties off, nearly tearing them in the process.
“Yeah, I am.”
He let his head fall back to rest on the headboard, lidded eyes staring into your reflection while his hands laid still on the outside of your hips - even farther away from where you wanted him. He really wasn’t going to move an inch until he heard you beg for it, though he couldn’t help himself from digging his fingers into your soft flesh.
You groaned in frustration, “Fucking hate you.”
“Nah, you don’t.”
His lips grazed your earlobe and you wanted to roll your eyes at the smug look on his face, “Now, c’mon, baby. Beg.”
You moved your hands behind you so you could thread your fingers through the hair at the back of his head.
“Fuck, please, Logan - need you.”
“Need me how?”
He really was an asshole.
“Need your hands - need your fingers, please,” you groaned.
“I don’t know, you think you’ve been a good girl? Think you deserve it?”
You would’ve been pissed at him had he not turned you on beyond belief. You gave in, becoming putty in his arms.
“ ‘m good - been good for you,” you whined, using one of your hands on his to try and move it between your legs, “please.”
He sighed, returning his hand back to the hot skin of your inner thigh, “Shit, need me that bad? Huh, pretty girl?”
You were so worked up you could have cried from his teasing. You nodded eagerly, attempting to clamp your thighs together to force his hand to at least graze your cunt that was dripping onto his sheets.
He clicked his tongue and used his strong hands on the inside of your thighs to spread your legs again, “Gotta keep ‘em open for me, sweetheart.”
He dragged two of his fingers between your folds, messily toying with you. You gasped, gripping his arm and inadvertently leaving imprints from your fingernails.
“So fucking wet,” he huffed, gaze glued to the reflection of your spread legs in the mirror, “Pretty pussy’s all mine.”
You were already whimpering and moaning from the slightest touch.
“ ‘s yours - fuck, I‘m-I’m yours,” you sighed, eyes fluttering closed.
He hummed in agreement, his fingers prodding at your entrance.
“Please, please, please,” you whined, trying to push your hips forward.
“I think you’ve been real good, angel,” he was slipping his fingers further into you at an agonizingly slow pace, “think you deserve it.”
You were whining and whimpering so loud that you were sure someone had to have heard you by now. You couldn’t help the noises slipping from your mouth, feeling like you’d black out just from the sight of Logan’s fingers slipping between your swollen lips and into your cunt.
When he finally thrusted his fingers into you all the way down to his knuckles, you brought a hand up to cover your mouth in an attempt to muffle what you knew would be a pornographically loud moan.
He clicked his tongue, grabbing at your wrist to tug your hand away.
“Uh-uh, baby,” he panted into your ear, curling his fingers inside you, “wanna hear you - want everyone to know who’s makin’ you feel good like this.”
His thumb started to draw circles around your clit in rhythm with the movement of his fingers and you could feel the pressure in your stomach starting to build.
“Fuck,” he cursed, his jaw hung open while he watched his fingers disappear inside you over and over again with ease, “takin’ my fingers so well. I think you’d take somethin’ else real well, too.”
The intent of his words nearly drove you over the edge, your mind unable to stop conjuring up images of what it would be like when he finally did fill you like you’d wanted him to.
“Logan, Logan, I’m -,” you groaned, so close to finally coming on his fingers.
Until he slipped them out of you and pulled his hand away completely.
You choked out a sob, squeezing your eyes shut in frustration.
“I’m gonna let you finish, don’t worry,” he promised. You watched him suck his fingers clean before he used his arm around you to rearrange you both so that he was laying on his back and you were facing him with your legs straddling his torso. You could feel his erection poking at your ass and you licked your lips when you imagined being able to take him in your mouth, letting him fuck your throat to the point that your chin and the base of his cock were coated in your drool.
“C’mere, sweetheart,” Logan’s voice brought you out of thought and you let him guide your legs up until your knees were on either side of your head.
You looked down at him in curiosity, not yet understanding what it was he wanted to do.
Noticing your expression, he wrapped his arms around your thighs to pull your dripping pussy closer to his mouth.
“I’m gonna let you finish, baby, but it’s gotta be on my mouth. Sit.”
“You…” you hesitated for a second, feeling your face redden, “you want me to sit on your face? What if I crush you? Or suffocate you?’’
He chuckled at your concern, lovingly caressing your thighs, “You won’t, trust me. It’ll feel good, I promise. Besides, If you did suffocate me? I don’t think I’d wanna go any other way.”
You laughed nervously and let him pull you down further, sinking onto his face. His tongue swiped up your folds and you gripped the headboard so you wouldn’t fall forward.
“Jesus, Logan,” you gasped, your other hand gripping his hair, “feels so fucking good.”
“Uh-huh, told you, princess. Jus’ lemme take care of you,” he mumbled into your pussy, eating you like he was starved. He moved his head back and forth and up and down to lick every inch of you he could.
“I think I would’ve - ah, would’ve said somethin’ to you much sooner if I knew you could do this,” you joked a little, your small chuckle turning into a gasp when he slipped his tongue even further down so he was inside you. He hummed into you, his nose nudging against your clit. You began to grind your hips back and forth over his mouth, drunk off the way he moved his tongue.
“Atta girl,” he grunted, “use me, c’mon.”
His hairy arms were hooked around your thighs like a vice, to the point that you couldn’t lift your hips even if you wanted to. When his eyes weren’t trained on you above him, they were squeezed shut in an attempt to savor every second his tongue was in your pussy. He was pulling your thighs forward every time you rocked yourself back and forth, desperate to feel you come on - in - his mouth. 
You could already feel the pressure building in your stomach. The obscene wet noises coming from his mouth messily eating your cunt didn’t do much to ease it, either. Your eyes rolled back and you continued to ride his face, mouth hung open in ecstasy. Logan could tell you were close just from how sloppy your movements had become. 
“Gonna come for me already, honey?”
You hated how hot it was when he teased you, mocked your desperation.
“Fuck, yeah,” you groaned, your hips rolling forward.
“Lemme see it, pretty girl, come for me.”
You gasped at the filth spilling from his lips into you. It was more than enough to finally make the tension snap in your lower stomach, still rocking your hips over his mouth while you whimpered his name over and over again like a prayer.
Logan was practically growling into your cunt, feeling your muscles contract around his prodding tongue. He was trying to catch anything that possibly came from your release. You tasted good, but when you finished? Even fucking better.
“Lo-Logan, too much, s’ too much,” you tried to protest as he kept your thighs locked around his face, still lapping at you without slowing his pace. He hummed in response and finally let you go when he was sure he’d licked you clean.
You lifted your hips and moved to sit beside him on your heels, almost in pain at the loss of physical contact. When you finally got to see his face, his lips were red and raw, his chin and even the side of his cheeks coated in your slick. You watched in awe as he wiped his cheek, bringing his hand up to his mouth after to lick it clean.
“Taste fucking amazing,” he assured you, keeping his eyes on yours when he sucked on one of his fingers.
You caught sight of his obvious and rather large erection and your mouth began to water. Once again, you were lost in the thought of how good it would be to feel the weight of his cock in your mouth.
“You alright, baby?”
“Yeah, I - um,” you sighed, leaning forward on your hands, “can I - can I have it in my mouth? Just for a little bit?”
Your hand rested on his hip, fingers grazing the waistband of his sweatpants, dangerously close.
“Shit,” he huffed, his cock twitching from the anticipation, “you wanna?”
You nodded eagerly, pulling his pants and boxers down his thighs when he lifted his hips.
“Hey,” he tenderly stopped your hand as you reached to touch him, “I’m tellin’ you now, girl -  you can suck it ‘cause you asked so nicely but I’m not comin’ unless it’s in you.”
He let go of your wrist and tucked a piece of hair behind your ear, continuing to speak.
“I can fill your throat another time, yeah?”
You were speechless, lidded eyes switching from his face to his swollen cock and back again. You nodded in agreement.
You guessed Logan would be big - he was generally a large guy - but you could feel the drool gathering in your mouth when his cock sprung out of his boxers to hit his stomach. He was fucking huge. You might’ve been nervous if you weren’t so eager to fit him into your mouth. You finally leaned down to wrap a hand around the base of his cock, softly licking at his leaking tip.
Logan threaded your hair between his fingers, gathering as much as he could to form a makeshift ponytail that was held together by his fist. 
“Like seein’ your pretty face. You’re so fuckin’ gorgeous, you know that?”
His words only spurred you on and you gathered as much saliva as possible so you could spit onto his cock. When you did, you started to stroke him in a slow rhythm that had him rocking his hips towards your hand already. His mouth hung open and his eyes were glued to your movements, watching you work your hand up and down. Your spit coated your hand and his cock to the point that it was dripping down his balls.
The moment you finally closed your mouth around him, he was practically a mess.
You took him as deep as you could, relaxing your throat and steadily breathing. You gagged as his tip hit the back of your throat and he groaned. He watched your head bob up and down while you simultaneously stroked whatever you couldn’t fit into your mouth. He huffed out your name in between cursing under his breath. His gaze caught the mirror he’d nearly forgotten about and he could’ve came just from the sight of your mouth drooling around him.
“So good, baby,” he sighed, licking his lips, “you look so pretty suckin’ my cock.”
You reveled in the praises spilling from his lips. Chasing more, you used your hand that wasn’t around him to cup his balls and massage gently. He actually whimpered and you could feel Logan’s legs start to shake a bit.
“Alright, enough - ,” he grunted, using his grip on your hair to pull your mouth from him and push your hand away.
You almost looked hurt, pouting while looking between him and his glistening cock. Truthfully, you liked the taste of him. Loved it, really, so much so that you had to hold back from diving right back into position. Just the idea had you clenching your thighs together when you thought of it. When your mouth was already on him? You were so wet again that it was starting to smear across your inner thighs.
“Sorry, doll,” he apologized while swiping fallen strands of hair from your face, “too close.”
It felt exhilarating being able to turn big, bad, scary Wolverine into a whimpering mess after only a couple minutes in your mouth.
“I’m gonna come in you,” he reiterated, “gonna make you mine.”
You just about melted into putty from his words.
“ ‘m yours, ‘v been yours.”
Your voice was desperate and you crawled onto him, straddling his hips. Your bare cunt slid against the base of his cock and his hips jerked up.
“Fuck,” he panted, “you wanna know somethin’? Been thinking about this for so long, even when I thought you hated me - I couldn’t help it.”
“Me too,” you replied, hands on his chest to steady yourself, “even when I thought you hated me. Used to think - to think about jus’ getting you alone.”
“Yeah?” He teased, one of his hands coming down to align his cock with your entrance, “what did you think about doing when you got me alone, hm?”
“I - ah, f-fuck,” you tried to speak, stuttering when he started to slip himself in as slowly as possible, “letting you fuck me, having - having your fingers in me.”
“So, is it as good as you imagined?”
“Mm,” you tried to respond and only whined from the pressure of Logan pushing you down further onto his cock and stretching you out, “better, it’s better.”
“You think you can take all of it, sweetheart?”
“I need it, please, please, Logan - need you.”
You could rarely recognize your own voice, strained and desperate.
“Only ‘cause you begged so nice.”
In one hard thrust, he pushed your hips down onto his.
Your jaw hung open and your eyes rolled back into your head. You’d never felt so fucking full before, like he reached every inch of where you wanted him. 
“Fucking - Christ, Logan, you - ah,” your sentence was cut off when he began to grind up into you, using his grip on your hips to keep you steady and gently help guide you up and down. 
“Hm? What, baby?”
When you sat back down on him, he used an iron grip to keep you where you were, pushing himself as far into you as he possibly could. The friction on your clit made your pussy twitch and he definitely felt it, pulling you back and forth a little bit.
Again, you couldn’t speak - too distracted by the indescribable feeling of having him sheathed completely inside you. Your eyes started to water, tears forming from the overwhelming pleasure in the pit of your stomach. 
“Fuck me,” you nearly sobbed, leaning forward to bury your face in his neck, “please, please.”
He finally let you lift your hips up and down again and you were a whining fucking mess. Logan could see over your shoulder into the mirror and he marveled at the white ring you left around the base of his cock every time you lifted your hips. You were messy, exactly how he wanted you - he’d probably lick you clean after, if you’d let him.
You were rambling into his neck, panting, “so fucking - you’re so big, oh my god, need you all - ah - all the time.”
He was smirking to himself, smug from how he was able to fuck you to the point that you were just letting go completely - telling him every thought that popped into your mind while you were still on top of him. You worked yourself up to a steady rhythm and he indulged in the image of your tits bouncing above him when you sat up. 
“So good, honey - takin’ me so well, like you were made for me,” he groaned. His eyes never left yours.
“ ‘m made for - for you,” you slurred, rolling your hips.
“That’s right, sweetheart. Who’s this pussy belong to, huh? Tell me.”
“Yours, I - it’s yours, Logan.”
Your thighs started to ache pretty quickly, your pace faltering as he kept steadily drilling up into you. 
“Are you sore, baby? You wanna switch?”
His voice was so soft in comparison to how he was speaking moments earlier through gritted teeth. You nodded and let him lay you on your back, climbing over you and caging you in with his forearms on either side of your head. He placed a tender kiss on your forehead, both cheeks, the tip of your nose and finally, your lips. You were absolutely giddy from the sickly sweet moments you shared inbetween the times where he was fucking you so hard you were out of breath. 
Your ankles locked behind Logan’s back to pull him into you while he tried to guide himself with his hand. He slipped back in effortlessly and ground his hips forward, pinning you down to the mattress. One of his arms was snaked around your back to hold you closer and the other was holding your wrists together above your head.
His hips rolled forward and he hit a spot inside of you that made the fire in the pit of your stomach rise.
You choked out a sob and tried to squirm in an attempt to free your wrists, but you both knew there was no way you’d wiggle out of his grip unless he let you. To no surprise, a man made of mostly metal was almost impossibly strong when he pinned you down with his hands and hips.
“I gotcha’.” he panted, so close that your noses brushed together when he thrust forward, “you’re not goin’ anywhere, sweetheart.”
As if you’d want to move from your spot underneath him.
Your eyes caught the shining metal of the dog tags hanging from his neck, swinging back and forth over your chest when he moved. When you looked back up to his face, his eyes were boring into yours. His face was flushed and his mouth hung open, sweat accumulating on his brow. He looked fucking gorgeous. You were going to tell him so, try to lean up to kiss him, but he spoke again before you could.
“I’m in love with you - ‘m so in love with you, you know that?”
The pace of his thrusts quickened and you could’ve cried at the sincerity had he not been drilling into you so hard that you could barely open your eyes.
“I - I’m, ah - in love with - with you, too,” you choked out between gasps.
“So pretty,” he muttered, finally letting go of your wrists so he could hold your chin to force you to keep your eyes on him, “i’m so fucking lucky.”
It was all too much - the sincere adoration in his voice combined with the filthy way he was snapping his hips into yours - and you could feel the knot in your lower stomach start to come undone.
“Logan, fuck, I’m -,” you tried to tell him you were close, but his thrusts were knocking the wind out of you.
“God, please - c’mon, c’mon,” he was pleading through gritted teeth, trying with everything in him to hold back from coming before you did. His hand slipped between your bodies so he could draw tight circles around your clit and your eyes squeezed shut in ecstacy. 
You were chanting his name after a couple more strokes, tears rolling down the side of your face while he pounded you through your orgasm. You were practically seeing stars, your legs shaking around his waist.
He could feel your muscles contract around him and his movements became sloppy. He was grunting with every roll of his hips, muttering praises under his breath.
So fucking pretty
Look so beautiful like this
So perfect
He was spilling into you seconds later, animalistically groaning into your ear. His hips slowed to a halt, his arms still wrapped around you. You were both shiny and sticky with sweat, panting with flushed faces. When he pulled his face from your ear, he was beaming like an idiot, already drowsy.
“Was that good, baby?”
He was still out of breath, using one arm to weakly hold himself above you while he stroked your hair. 
“Are you serious? More than good,” you chuckled, “amazing.”
He tenderly kissed your forehead and rolled beside you, immediately wrapping you in his arms.
“Don’t we have to clean up?” you asked, eyes already starting to flutter closed.
“Mhm,” he hummed, nuzzling his face into the back of your neck, “can do it later - wanna cuddle.”
You grinned wide, amused by how damn cute he was. You simply hummed in agreement, resting your hand over his.
“Logan?”
“Mm?”
“I love you.”
“I love you too, sweetheart.”
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A/N: I had to close my laptop and walk away a a couple time while writing this so I hope it drives you as insane as it did me! I'm gnawing at the bars of my enclosure
If you enjoyed, thank you for reading and pls like/reblog!! <3 and thank u sm for the love on part 1!
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twstowo · 11 months ago
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Kissing Their Foreheads [Twst Third Years]
˗ˏˋ ★ ˎˊ˗SYNOPSIS: You kiss their foreheads.
♡︎ Includes: Third Years
[First Years]☆[Second years]☆[Here]☆[One final forehead kiss]☆[Extras]
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⋆⋅☆Cater:
It took him a moment to realize that you had kissed his forehead, but when the realization fully processed inside his head, he hugged you. He was happy that you kissed him there since he understands the meaning behind kisses. He took a picture of both of you but, for once, didn’t share it. He would like to keep this moment for himself since he felt so content with you showing him affection.
──── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ────
⋆⋅☆Trey:
You can even catch him off guard while he is cooking, and his reaction will be the same. He gives you a sweet smile and caresses your hair. He is accustomed to kissing his younger siblings' foreheads and receiving some in return, so he sees the gesture as something completely normal.
──── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ────
⋆⋅☆Leona:
Leona gives you the biggest side eye ever. "What was that for, Herbivore?" Throw him in the pit! You need to explain that you just wanted to kiss his forehead, as if he didn’t know already. He will probably just go back to sleep. As you start to stand up, ready to leave him alone since he clearly didn’t seem that fazed with the kiss, he just pulls you down. Now you are stuck with a sleeping Leona. If you decide to rest and fall asleep, he gives you a forehead kiss.
──── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ────
⋆⋅☆Vil:
He raises his eyebrow at you, but then laughs it off. He takes hold of your hand and kisses it while staring at you the whole time, making you turn into an embarrassed mess. He just loves that look of yours, so he gets a little bolder and slowly kisses up your arm. Once he is done, he tells you your hair looks dishevelled and suggests you come with him so that he can fix it. Will he really just fix your hair? We will never know.
──── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ────
⋆⋅☆Rook:
Finds it so interesting that you just kissed his forehead. To be fair, he knows that you have been kissing everyone’s forehead, so he was just waiting painfully for his turn. Now that he finally got his kiss, he isn’t completely satisfied. Only one kiss? If you give in and give him another, he will go in for your defenceless neck and give it a kiss. You jump in your spot with the unexpected touch, and you can only watch as he laughs at your embarrassed reaction.
──── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ────
⋆⋅☆Idia:
He had been hiding from you since he overheard your conversation about kissing him with Ortho. Don't get him wrong, he had been dreaming of you kissing him for the longest time ever, but the thought of it actually happening scares him away. So when you found his hiding spot, his room, and just took hold of his blushing face, you gave him a soft forehead kiss. He won't move from his spot no matter what you do, so you just decide to leave him alone. At night, he will be giggling, twirling his hair, waving his legs in the air while thinking about the kiss you gave him.
──── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ────
⋆⋅☆Lilia:
Oh my, a forehead kiss? He is so glad for the sweet gesture. However, he is also aware that you have been kissing everyone’s foreheads, and he had been spending all of his time hearing a whining Malleus who had yet to receive one of those kisses from you. So he takes hold of you and just teleports you to Malleus, leaving the two of you alone.
──── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ────
⋆⋅☆Malleus:
Literally runs to you as soon as he sees you, with this not suspicious at all look on his face as he tries to start a normal conversation with you. But he keeps on throwing random comments about kisses and foreheads. He keeps showing his forehead to you as if trying to convey what he wants. When you tell him that you can't reach his forehead, his eyes widen as he had never thought of it before. So he leans down, and he finally gets his well-deserved kiss. You can see how happy he is, there is this silly smile plastered on his face, and he can’t get it to go away.
@k4sumis0u
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drabblejester · 2 months ago
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Ratio, Sampo, Aventurine, Jing Yuan and Mr Reca overhead reader feels about them (basically reader has a crush on them)
how VARIOUS HSR GUYS would react to OVERHEARING YOU CONFESS!
requested by: anon :3
pairings: ratio, sampo, aventurine, jing yuan, and mr. reca x gn!reader
content warnings: none!!
comments: im devouring a pizza rn as of typing this. its so good.. this one is also in bulletted list bc i didnt get any specifications sorry my liege<3
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AVENTURINE:
he overhears you talking on the phone in another room, probably to your friend. he isn’t one to eavesdrop but just this once…
he acts very calm about it, totally poker-faced to the point where you think he didn’t hear for WEEKS
until one night he asks you about it, and tells you to talk to him about it more later.
you fall asleep with him, and when you wake up, you tell him as promised!!
he still has to get used to people. y’know. liking him. so he’s a bit awkward for a while, but he warms up! sadly doesn’t soften up for a LONG while though
SAMPO:
he overhears you talking to an interviewer in belobog talking about a ‘handsome blue haired man’
first of all he is FLATTERED that someone in this cold world actually likes him. second of all he registers that someone likes him about 5 seconds later and panics a bit
truly, his whimsical and silly demeanor has captivated you! but it was meant to be for lying and getting away with things, not actual flirting. so he thinks he’s screwed
but he’s NOT screwed! he makes a plan to corner you later in the night to have a bit of banter, but you end up cornering him!!
you two talk for a bit, you talk about how cool and yummy he is. he says it back and you both end up having a great night! maybe a kiss or two persnaps…
DR. RATIO:
he accidentally peeks over your shoulder at your texts (god damn curiosity) and sees you panic texting someone about the Super Duper Hot Professor Man that just so happened to pass by you. and that’s now standing behind you.
now obviously you probably freak out because oh my gods thats the guy RIGHT BEHIND YOU. you turn around and stammer for a bit
sadly ratio just gives you a dirty look (not on purpose) and tells you to seek knowledge, not him. he winds up lecturing you about feelings and professionalism for a good 20 minutes
you go home and wind down for a bit to process the lecturing, and just hang out. you start to have some second thoughts about everything
until a nice little package arrives at your door, with a nice cooked meal and a note that’s a very passive aggressive way of saying ‘take care of yourself’
JING YUAN:
he overheard you gossiping with the guards, and nothing escapes his ears. he didn’t confront you about it right away of course, since he didn’t want to freak you out or anything
so instead, he just played the waiting game. he waited for weeks upon weeks, hearing all the thoughts you thought about him, and every little thing you tried to do to court him
and he’s flattered!! very flattered actually. he decides to eventually send a guard out with a hand written letter to you, simply saying to meet him at a restaurant he found out you frequented
you two meet there, talk for a bit, but not as a general and you. you talk like strangers but in the best way possible, getting to know even more about eachother!! you eat some yummy food and chitchat the night away
and eventually he brings you back to his place, settling you down with some tea and light snacks. maybe a few long-drawn stories to help you sleep. sadly (or thankfully) he ends up asleep before you, so you have extra time to admire him :3
MR. RECA:
he finds out through social media! you broke his ‘no recording in the studio’ rule, posted a blurry video somewhere, and went absolutely crazy over him in the caption
he’s upset that you broke his rule, but at the same time. thinks its interesting. he doesn’t do much else except revisit the post once more before meeting with you
you two meet up in his office, and he immediately brings up the post. of course you apologize so so hard about breaking the rules, but he waves it off!!
eventually the conversation ends up circling around to emotions (with a bit of help from memokeepering), and you spill all your thoughts and feelings right then and there. he’s slightly shocked, but it soon turns to a smile before politely telling you to leave his office
you’re definitely nervous, but it all fades away once you find out you’ve been casted in the main role alongside him! for better or for worse though, it’s a romance production. that asshole.
im fucking up this pizza rn my lieges its so yummy
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paolachatters · 1 month ago
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Honestly during S1 I like Caitlyn she was endearing to me and I like her in relation to Vi. But it wasn't until season 2 that she became a CHARACTER to me. I have so many thoughts about her, she's so interesting to me.
A foil for Jinx in that they both lose someone and in the process, lose their stability, a parental figure steps in and shoves their perspective on them.
She's not a leader, she's a pawn, her grief a vehicle for Ambessa to actually ascend to power constantly undermining her calling her child, reminding her of her anger, going behind her back to do things Caitlyn wouldn't actually approve. Using sex to distance herself of not only Vi but as a distraction of everything.
Being in a position where now the person she loves and the person she hates could both lose a parent without her help and choosing to trust her instinct and her heart knowing that the creature they were looking for IS Vander.
Betraying the person who was manipulating her, letting go of the hate that made her into someone she couldn't recognize, and once again trusting her heart in the process, and being someone whose actions speak for her because her words betray her.
Fighting not from the distance like she had always done as a sniper, but actually putting her body into it, sacrifice, like Ambessa thought her.
In the last scene is one of the few times we see her without a uniform, she lost her eye, her seat is now Sevika's therefore not just giving her a seat but THE Kiramman seat as in she's putting her weight into it. And clearly still on a mission along with Vi, letting her rest, letting her grieve, with some sense of peace.
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kinardsevan · 2 months ago
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i wrote a whole ass psychology breakdown (for the first time in FOREVER) about the break-up. enjoy (if you so choose):
so I've been reading a lot in relation to Tommy's speech during the break-up (and have actually gotten through the scene several times now, mostly as a creative reference for these fix-it fics. I think one of the first things that I've seen completely tossed aside (that bothers the shit out of me as someone with over a decade of therapy treatment and a psychology degree) is whatever trauma Tommy carries.
We know that there are issues with his dad. We know Lou's lore behind him is that he spent a lot of his childhood alone. We don't know anything in relation to his mom, but she may or may not be the cause of more trauma. We know that his way of dealing with abuse of authority is to shut down and follow the leader, which is likely a mix of his military time and growing up in his father's household (and when I say this, I mean from what we saw of him under Gerrard's command). This is a person who has put years into getting himself into some version of okay after all that he's endured, and we know he still generally does it on his own.
To that end, here, have my breakdown of the break up (roughly right about the time Buck says "I want you to move in with me"). (with pictures!)
Prior to the offer, we watch Tommy process through Evan's explanation about his relationship with Abby, things being transformative for him, etc. We have to bare in mind that this is where we also start to get what I've dubbed "starry-eyed Buck". He's so in the throes of what he's saying that I don't think he's really considering the connotation of his words. At the same time, Tommy doesn't know what lore Evan is about to drop him about this prior relationship. Remember that he now has to contend with the fact that they both have strong opinions on their relations toward Abby, and Tommy can't know if their feelings toward her as a person will be the same. I think Lou played this beautifully, appearing anxious and apprehensive as Tommy listened to Evan explain that Abby was transformative for him. Then he shifts into how Tommy has been transformative for him (which, he has, and we as the audience know this, but we understand it from a bigger POV than what Evan is saying with his words.)
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There have been posts about Evan putting Tommy up on a pedestal throughout this speech (and really, possibly even sooner, but this is where we really get it expressed). Tommy tries to rectify this to a degree by countering "I wasn't always that way".
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To that end, we then get Evan telling him "I know, and it just makes me admire you more." Tommy gives a bashful smile, clearly heartened by the statement, and even opening his mouth as though he's going to respond to it in some form. It would be interesting to know what was on Lou's mind of what (if anything) he thought would've been said there. Are there lines that were removed in this scene? Was 'I love you' actually going to come up? We can't really know. However, there's this part of me that thinks that Tommy thought that they were having a discussion on the depth of their relationship which would've possibly brought those 7 letters to the equation. Either way, this entire bit of facial acting is SO important, because it speaks volumes about how Tommy feels about how Evan feels about him.
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From there we get the "I want you to move in with me, and this, THIS, THIS is such an important point for this ENTIRE scene. It's two seconds, but it holds SO much for the narrative. This man, who seems to be on the verge of ...something, clearly (who knows if I Love You was on his mind, or if it was just the fact that Evan was expressing how much he cares about him.) The reason this is all so important is THIS REACTION:
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Now again, we don't know Tommy's trauma, but the joy literally drops out of his expression and shifts to panic. Now, speaking solely from the standpoint that these two haven't even said "I love you" yet, his boyfriend steamrolled over him from a possible declaration of love straight to moving in together without discussing semantics. Further, it's not even "I want to live together", it's "move in with me". We don't know much about Tommy's house (because these shitheads haven't built him a set yet), but we know that he has a HOUSE. With a GARAGE. Buck lives in a LOFT. Regardless of how much of an asshole this makes me sound like, it's crawling with red flags. It comes across as "fit more into my life" instead of "lets do this thing together". Further, if that's not bad enough, mention of getting engaged and married is thrown at Tommy as well, which holds two major bits of information: One, these are on Evan's mind. We've NEVER heard him talk about getting engaged or married to anyone. This speaks to the importance of their relationship to him, but the lack of I Love You also speaks on his own trauma. If we truly are getting the rom-com trope, at some point there's likely to be a conversation about why he lept over it (*cough* Taylor, his parents *cough cough*). Meanwhile, as he's continued in his starry-eyed speech, this is what Tommy is giving:
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Now for those who don't know how to spot it, this my friends is a PANIC RESPONSE. The shift forward, the move to get up, the literal deep breath. He's having a panic attack. Now, obviously we don't know what brought this on, but god-willing, we WILL get the answers.
Now, to his own point, Tommy doesn't just straight up pop Evan's pink bubble. He does express that it's a sweet sentiment, but that it's a bad idea. To which point we get:
"Evan, that is so sweet. But I can't move in with you." "And why not?" Because. I know how this ends." "Uh, what-what's that supposed to mean?"
At which point, we clearly get the qualities about Evan that Tommy likes. "Incredible guy. Big-hearted. Hot as hell. Impulsive." I don't feel that the expression here matters as much as his tone of voice, because we can see on his face that he's expressing these qualities from a good place. The next point of reference isn't until Tommy's next line, when he says that Evan's reaction is out of things being "new and exciting".
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To that end, the way Evan is talking to him makes this statement valid. He's not talking to Tommy like they've been together for six months and have built a relationship that should be moving in this direction. (For the tenth time I will repeat, he couldn't even dignify whether he was in love with Tommy when Josh asked).
Furthermore, I think when you consider this part of the scene, you also have to consider the strain in Tommy's voice. Something about those concepts (living together, getting engaged, married) is terrifying. It definitely gives the impression that Tommy has been faced with some version of this before and he got burned. Why is this important? Because of this:
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"I'm saying no matter how bad I want it to be, I'm not your last." Those 9 words are important on their own, but when you couple them with the expression on Tommy's face and what we've just seen him go through, there's a clear point to the fact that he's been through this before. I also think that there can't be enough importance placed on the way he intonates "how bad". This is not a man saying no because he doesn't want to. He's backpedaling because he's sure that he's going to get burned. We get this point further driven home with this exchange:
"I'm your first." "But hey, they can be the same thing." "But, they usually aren't."
See this doesn't read to me as someone who's scared because he knows Evan has never been with another man. They're both fully grown adults who have had multiple relationships. What this speaks to me (now) as, is someone who has let someone convince him before that he would be their forever, that they were all in, and then broke him. When you include his childhood trauma and whatever abandonment issues it's left him with in correlation with all of this, yes, it's still an extremely biphobic set of lines. But in the context of what he's expressing and why, it's not about telling Evan he needs more experience, it's about telling him that he doesn't believe that he'll want to stay settled down with him six months, a year, etc., down the road. And THAT my friends, is abandonment issues 101. "Everyone else has left, so it doesn't matter that I'm in love with you, because you will leave too, and I need to protect myself from that."
Following that, we get this: "if I were to move in with you, you wouldn't mean to, you wouldn't plan for it, but you'd end up breaking my heart."
This line is SO important, right next to Evan's exchange with Josh about his relationship with Tommy. Why? Because even though neither of them have said it, it spells out that these two are in fact in love with each other, even if they haven't said it.
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"I don't think I could deal with that." Tommy is fucking GONE on him. He's expressing that if he gave himself fully over to what Evan's referring to, losing him would break him. Again, we don't have the full picture on his trauma, but we know there's a mountain there. It's also worth noting again, that the intonation he uses in these statements clearly come across as someone trying to reign in their emotions and keep it together. That says to me that we're dangeously close to touching his trauma.
I don't feel like I have to include the final few bits of the scene in gifs because they're all over the site now, but the next line gives over the fact that he hasn't really been open about his trauma to Evan, given that his immediate response to expressing all of this is "I should go". This kind of reaction is generally brought on as not being accepted for having certain feelings. Now, obviously Evan is caught off guard by the entire interaction, the same way Tommy was (but for different reasons), so we have to take all of that into account when we think about the fact that instead of countering Tommy's logic, he asks instead if Tommy is breaking up with him.
Body language is also so important here for Tommy. His shoulders are hunched in, we see him wipe his face (meaning there are likely tears), and when he turns around, he's so caught up in whatever wave has taken him over that it takes Evan asking him for Tommy to state "yeah, I guess I did" about breaking up. Further, there's the fact that he states that he didn't see the break-up coming, which goes back to my point at the top of this post, that he clearly thought the conversation was going one direction, and instead it goes the other. From this point, we have Evan reeling, because he wants to create more of a life with Tommy, while Tommy is shutting down because of whatever is holding him back.
Finally, as I've referenced before, we get this line:
"Should've known that parking spot was too good to be true."
That line makes zero sense out of context, but in consideration of someone trying to lighten the weight they're carrying (which you can literally see by the way he has his hand on his neck, which you generally only see people do as a stress response). You can also double entendre this statement that getting to be with Evan was too good to be true. We get that little inhale with the smile, and I swear to God the only time I've seen that kind of reaction is right before someone cracks.
And then in closing, we get the "I'll see you 'round, Buck," our closing gut punch. Evan is still reeling, clearly. His face is very "what the hell just happened". Tommy is clearly not okay. This entire scene has opened an entire can of worms on them without a whole lot of answers.
Now, I've owned the fact that basically from the end of 806, I felt like this had to be a swerve, and that there has to be more to the story. I've also pretty much owned the fact that if the writers did actually just do this for kicks and don't have a resolution for it, I may not keep watching. However, in the context of the fact that, for the moment, I'm choosing to put hope in some kind of resolution, these lines make so much more sense. It is worth noting though, most people in the fandom, let alone the general audience, aren't going to psychologically break this shit down line-by-line. They're not going to lean into whatever trauma Tommy has that we don't know about yet. Its why the internet has been a mess since Thursday night. But it's also why I talk about how, when this situation gets resolved (because right now I refuse to say if), Buck has to give up the loft and give more of himself. Tommy, by the nature of the show, has fully immersed himself in Evan's life, but we haven't seen or heard mention of Evan doing so at all in Tommy's life. That doesn't mean he hasn't, but we haven't gotten any version of that. So when I say Evan needs to give things up... it's about matching what he's asking Tommy to give up. Because at the end of the day, when this circles back around, he's effectively going to be asking Tommy to trust that he won't break his heart like others have, and when you have a lifetime of abandonment issues and have learned to cope by being hyper-independent and alone, moving in the opposite direction is more terrifying than anything else. ESPECIALLY when you love that person, which we saw Tommy spell out. Evan has the ability to break him (and probably already is via this cut-off-at-the-quick break up.)
So, I'm really gonna need these shit heads to figure out that they'll be more miserable apart than they'd ever be together.
That's all. Thanks for coming to my TED talk.
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babyleostuff · 4 months ago
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˚ ༘♡ 𝐧𝐚𝐢𝐥 𝐚𝐫𝐭 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐢𝐫 𝐬/𝐨
― which members would be interested in watching their partner do their nail art/ ask questions and try to be involved in the process bc they're genuinely interested
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joshua
because shua enjoys arts and crafts himself, he’s so so happy whenever he can watch you do your nails - it’s alway so much fun. actually, the second you say you need to do your nails, it’s joshua that drags you to the table and sits you on the chair and puts all of your tools, nail polishes, uv lamps in front of you. watching you do all of those crazy nail arts, there’s something soothing about it. and it never gets boring for you either, with joshua by your side - he will ask you about all of the details of why’s and how’s.
wonwoo
you could be doing or talking about whatever and wonwoo would still sit there and listen to you like a hypnotised man. bro is a simp and though usually he couldn't care less about nails and doing art on them or whatever, because it's YOU he’ll sit his ass down and watch every step of you doing your nails like it’s the most fascinating thing ever. wonwoo will ask about your nail polishes and why you have to apply this before that etc etc, not because he feels obligated to fill in the silence but because he’s genuinely interested. he loves listening to you talk about a subject that you’re so fond of. 
dk
please let him pick your nail polish colour!!! seokmin gets so giddy when you tell him that you have to do your nails, because that means he’ll get to spend at least three hours watching you and you won’t be able to do anything about it. he’s like a child that has to touch and ask about everything, so it’s kind of like entertaining a child, but you never mind him being so genuinely happy about you and your nail art. it’s cute how dk gets confused by certain steps, or why you have to do something this particular way etc. and he spends at least fifteen minutes after you finish, gushing about the beautiful designs you painted. 
mingyu
is he a six foot two giant or a princess? i guess the latter since he adores watching you do your nails so much and every time you do, gyu wants you to paint his nails too, at least one, but is too shy to ask. he always has to touch everything that’s laying on the table, so while you’re prepping your nails, he’s rummaging through all of your tools and asks what each of them is for. mingyu also gets so excited when you ask him if he could pass you *insert a nail tool* and he has to guess which one you’re talking about. 
minghao
i think it’s mainly because hao has done his nails before himself, he’d be eager to hear why you chose a certain design or why you put those particular charms on, you know - he likes knowing the reason behind something. and there’s something quite intimate about nails and nail art, he thinks, so getting to know the story behind your current set would be something very xu minghao.
seungkwan
one thing about seungkwan is that he loves being part of whatever you’re currently doing and making it the best time you’ve ever had. he lives for quality time with you, so it’s not a shocker that he enjoys watching you do your nails very much + a lot of the time he steals your nail polish and does his own nails at the same time you’re doing yours. you always have a blast laughing at his bad designs, and how he always manages to spill the nail polish over his cuticles and edges. boo gets so happy when you ask him about his thoughts on nail polish colours or which charms you should pick out and where to place them. no one could make doing nails as entertaining as boo seungkwan. 
vernon
vernon finds it so cool how you’re able to do all of these designs on your freaking nails of all places. he loves sitting by your side, not saying much in his vernon fashion, and following your every move from the beginning, when you prep your nail, to the moment when you’re attaching different charms or doing cool designs. it’s kind of hypnotising for vernon and he’s always able to relax and wind down when watching you do your nails. 
dino
are you kidding me? baby wants to be a part of everything you do. he is a puppy that follows your every step, so of course he loves watching you do your nails. it’s unbelievable to him how you’re able to paint on your nails AND make pretty designs on them and not just splotches of nail polish. he always talks your ear off about what tool does what, and why you do that before doing the other thing, etc etc, but gosh… it’s so endearing when he sits there with his sparkly eyes, looking at you like you’re the coolest person on earth   
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heartsforvin · 4 months ago
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ONLINE LOVE
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thank you nonnie for the request !! i hope you like it (:
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pairing: gamer!vinnie hacker x fem!reader
warnings: cussing, sexual jokes / innuendos, pure fluff
summary: when vinnie goes on omegle one random night out of boredom, he doesn’t expect to meet you and fall in love in the process
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with nothing to do on a friday night, vinnie decided to go on omegele. he hadn't been on the site in years, and honestly thought it had gotten banned.
tagging it with a few trendy things, vinnie fixed up his appearance just a bit before clicking on the video option.
of course he knew he wasn't going to get lucky with someone not showing their junk right away, so he wasn't disappointed when he saw some random guy's dick.
after a few skips and boring people, he finally got to you. "holy shit." he thought he said that in his head, but when you looked up, he knew he didn't.
with a furrow to your eyebrows, you give him a small smile as you say hello.
vinnie can't help but give himself a few extra minutes to stare, you were just so pretty. after a minute, he clears his throat and smiles.
"i'm sorry," he apologizes with a laugh. "just didn't expect to see such a pretty girl."
blushing, you thank him with a smile of your own. "you're not so bad yourself." you reply.
vinnie chuckles as he thanks you like you did him. overtime, the two of you ask each other questions about the other, along with interests.
"you play any video games?" he asks you, and you smile with a shake to your head.
it was honestly kind of hard to focus on conversation with him. the first thing you had noticed when he popped up on your screen was his eyes.
vinnie notices you staring at him and smirks. "am i really that nice to look at?" he chuckles.
you rid your thoughts quickly, almost being embarrassed that he caught you. you wouldn't have the confidence to admit it, but he was good to look at.
smiling, you quickly divert the conversation to his previous question. "not much of a gamer really, unless you count the sims." you say.
vinnie laughs and shakes his head. "nah i'm talkin' real games." he tells you.
rolling your eyes playfully, you give him a scoff. "oh so you're one of those people." you say with a laugh.
when vinnie heard you laugh he swore his heart skipped a beat, and not even to be dramatic. he watched as you went on and on about how the sims was real gaming.
he saw your smile and knew that's something he wanted to see more of. "woah hey, calm down." vinnie laughs as he cuts you off.
you smile, pushing a loose strand of hair behind your ear. "what? sims is real gaming, you nerd." you tell him.
vinnie takes in your appearance again and the clothes you're wearing. he can't get enough of you and he just met you.
you do the same, looking at him through the laptop screen, faint blush spreads across your cheeks.
vinnie stands up and the breath is almost knocked out of you when he does. he's wearing sweatpants and a white tank top, muscles on full display.
"you lookin' at my arms or...?" vinnie asks with a chuckle as he sees you staring. "because i can give you soethin' to look at."
laughing, you roll your eyes at him again. "definitely don't want to see that. i've seen too many."
vinnie chuckles and nods his head, completely understanding. although, it doesn't stop him from making a comment.
"you sure? because i do have a tattoo there, but if you don't want see i guess you'll never know." he shrugs.
you wish you were near him so you could hit his arm, instead, you result in a playful scoff and sarcastic reply. "you do not have a tattoo there."
the blonde laughs but shrugs again. "how'd you know if you've never seen it?"
this time, its your turn to shrug. "guess i'll just have to take your word for it." you tell him.
the playful banter continues for about another hour. neither you or vinnie thought you'd actually meet a decent person on this site tonight, but you're both happy you did.
"okay," you say, getting vinnie's attention back onto you and not his phone. "other than gaming, what do you do?"
vinnie stifles a laugh at the question, knowing his answer. "i stream." he tells you.
you already know his answer to your next question so he beats you to it by saying, "yes, i do stream video games."
you can't help but smile. "nerd." you comment with a laugh.
vinnie fires back. "you don't even play real video games, don't even give me that kind of attitude." he says with a laugh.
you brush him off with a scoff. that brought your attention back to the sims games and how you now suddenly got an idea.
"hey vinnie," you get his attention again and he looks up at you. "what if i told you i'm about to make you and me in sims?"
you were half joking, although you did think about the idea of it. vinnie furrows his eyebrows but has a smile on his face.
"that's cute, you should." he tells you, making you smile.
you nod, telling him you'll do it after you get done talking. the two of you talk more for a bit, jokes are made, smiles are shared along with laughs, and vinnie did make one or two comments about you blushing.
in all honesty, he was doing the same thing an you probably could notice. he couldn't help himself, he was starting to think he was falling a bit in love with you.
he did think it was way too soon to tell and you two had known each other for no longer than four hours.
silence fills you two for a minute before vinnie interrupts the silence with what you'd say is a crazy statement.
"you know what you could do if we ever do meet and possibly have a thing going?" he asks, and you don't reply right away, taking his words in.
you didn't want to rush anything at all, but the chemistry between the two of you was very noticeable. so, you raise your eyebrow as you wait for him to tell you.
he smirks, anf you instantly know its another one of his dirty jokes. "never had support from under the desk before."
the minute that sentence leaves his mouth your laughing loudly, quickly trying to stop yourself.
you give him that same look back, smirk turning into a smile as you tease him and tell him maybe one day it'll happen.
you both talk for a bit longer until the two of you decide to call it a night. before yo go, vinnie asks you for your number and you happily give it to him.
he was definitely falling in love with you now if he wasn't already.
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thank you nonnie for the request again !! i hope you liked it + everyone else reading this (:
comments, reblogs + feedback of any kind is appreciated <33
tags: @sturnioloshacker , @anqeliclust , @cosmicanakin , @42angelgirl , @leqonsluv3r , @khackerr , @louloulemons-blog , @visualbutterflysworld , @bernelflo , @slvthrs , @0strawberrysorbet0 , @supabhad , @kriissy4gov , @kayleighh , @hallecarey1 , @laylasbunbunny , @defnotayonna , @khxna , @jpg3 , @skye-44 , @eddieslut69 , @thesebitcheslovesosadotcom , @miilzzy
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