#there simply isnt one. i would have to be someone else to make this work and im n

[bidokja]

I was joking a while back that the actor they have playing KDJ for the orv movie was too handsome for him and a friend who's read orv was like "KDJ is actually secretly attractive!!" And I just felt my soul leave my body right then

SIGHS...

Okay. Buckle in. I'm gonna finally actually address and explain and theorize about this whole...thing.

I'm not gonna cite any exact chapters cause it's like 11:30 and I've got an 8 hour drive in the morning but I'll at least make an approximate reference to where certain things are mentioned. Also, this post is just my personal interpretation for a good bit of it, but it's an interpretation I feel very solid about, so do with that what you will. Moving on to the meat of things:

There is one (1) instance in the web novel that I know of which describes specific features of Kim Dokja (especially ones other people notice). This takes place when members of KimCom are trying to make Kim Dokja presentable to give his speech at the Industrial Complex (after it's been plopped down on Earth). This is when they start really paying attention and focusing on Kim Dokja's appearance since they're putting makeup on him; I still don't think they can interpret his whole face, but they can accurately pick out and retain more features than usual. If I remember correctly they reference him having long eyelashes, smooth skin, and soft hair. These features can be viewed as (stereotypically) attractive.

Certain parts of the fandom have taken this scene and run with it at a very surface level, without realizing (or without acknowledging at the very least) that this scene is not about how Kim Dokja looks. This is, in part, due to not realizing or acknowledging why Kim Dokja's face is "censored" in the first place, and what that censoring actually means. I think it's also possible that some people are assuming the censorship works like a physical phenomena rather than an altered perception.

I'll address that last point first. The censorship of Kim Dokja's features is not something as simple as a physical phenomena. It's not a bar or scribble or mosaic over his face. If that were true it'd be very obvious to anyone looking at him that his face is hidden. But his face is not hidden to people. They can look at him and see a face. If they concentrate on his eyes, they can see where he's looking. They know when he's frowning or grinning. They see a face loud and clear. But what face are they seeing? Because it's not really his, whatever they're seeing.

No one quite agrees on what he really looks like. And if they try and think about what he looks like, they can't recall. Or if they do, it's vague, or different each time. We notice these little details throughout the series. Basically, Kim Dokja's face is cognitively obscured. Something - likely the Fourth Wall, though I can't recall if this is ever stated outright - is interfering with everyone's ability to perceive him properly. This culminated in him feeling off to others; and since they don't even realize this is happening, they surmise that he is "ugly."

Moving on to the other point about what the censorship means: To be blunt, the censorship of his face is an allegory for his disconnect from the "story" (aka: real life, and the real people at his side). The lifting - however slight - of this censorship represents him becoming more and more a part of the "story" (aka: less disconnected from the life he is living and the people at his side). The censorship's existence and lifting can represent other things - like dissociation or depersonalization or, if you want to get really meta, the fact that he is all of our faces at once - but that's how I'd sum up the main premise of it. (The Fourth Wall is a larger part of the dissociation allegory, but that's for another post).

So you see, them noticing his individual features isn't about the features. It's not about the features! It doesn't matter at all which features got listed. Because they could describe any features whatsoever and it would not change the entire point of the scene. Because the point isn't what he looks like. The point is that they can truly and clearly see these features. For the first time. They are seeing parts of him for the first time. Re-read that sentence multiple times, literally and metaphorically. What does it mean to see someone as they are?

This is an extremely significant turning point dressed up as a dress-up scene.

---

P.S. / Additionally, I'm of the opinion that Kim Dokja is not handsome, and he is not ugly. He is not pretty, and he is not ghastly. Not attractive, nor unattractive. Kim Dokja isn't any of these things. More importantly, Kim Dokja can't be any of these things. The entire point of Kim Dokja is that you cannot pick him out of a crowd; he is the crowd. He's a reader. He's the reader. Why does he need to be handsome? Why must he be pretty? Why is him being attractive necessary or relevant? He doesn't, he doesn't, it's not. He is someone deeply deeply loved and irreplaceable to those around him, and someone who cannot even begin to recognize or accept that unless it's through a love letter masquerading as a story he can read. He is the crowd, a reader, the reader. He's you, he's me. He's every single one of us.

[handweavers]

repeatedly coming to the realization that i literally cannot afford to live in the west lol like with my set of circumstances & no high school diploma or college degree and disabilities + a disabled mother who hasn't been able to work for years what money we have saved up is running out so quickly and when it runs out we are completely fucked and i'm desperately trying to find some way to square that & stay in canada but there is none that doesn't require me to suddenly stop being disabled and severely mentally ill which isn't going to happen in this lifetime. which leaves the only other option (moving back home) which i would sincerely love for many reasons i have wanted to move home for a long time but it would require me to go off hrt/partially detransition for safety reasons + leave behind all my friends and my life here which is devastating in equal measure. what a beautiful world we live in

[apathyfairy]

i always said that once i stop caring what other people think about me it’s over for you bitches and it’s finally happened i’m literally untouchable

[autisticlee]

more people need to acknowledge the fact that hard work, putting all your effort into things, and trying your best DOESNT GUARANTEE SUCCESS. more people need to accept and acknowledge that no everyone can succeed with purely their own effort! sometimes the only thing you get for your hard work and effort is getting burnt out. not everyone is capable of succeeding on their own without other people to help and boost them or pure "luck" and telling everyone they can't possibly fail if they are trying hard enough only hurts the people who genuinely do try and don't make it in the end. normalize hard work not paying off and failing with no success and not actually having a realistic way to succeed!

[ranboolivesaysstuff]

Ill talk about it more actually on stream as I feel like whenever I post something on other sites it just causes more discourse because of how the site works and I feel like this reaches a good amount of my community. Its really really hard to like call out specific behaviors online because a lot of the time it just ends up putting the idea in people's heads and ends up making some problems worse. Basically i've said this before and I know sadly im probably going to have to say it again but dont send people racist things or harass them simply because you dont agree with something they say about me? Like I really dont take any criticism of my content to heart because I understand that it isnt for everyone! And thats okay! No ones content is ever for everyone and people are allowed to have a negative opinion and I welcome people who watch me to say "hey I think you could have done this better" as it allows me to improve? If you actually cared about my content enough to do those awful things you would actually allow criticism. Like I dont know what more I can say at this point and I know me doing this isnt going to get anything to stop simply because the people doing this are idiots. Please if you dont like something someone says about me just ignore it! If you really dont like it then block them! Internet arguments are useless 90 percent of the time and only lead to the people involved just feeling worse! So maybe instead of like harassing people because of an opinion they have about me, just post something else! Dont make random arguments from tiny things! A LOT of the time a lot of things people argue about are just their opinion, and if you feel so strongly about it that you resort to harassing them then YOU NEED TO GO OUTSIDE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD. Im not even going to say anything about how it affects me because if racism, transphobia, or any type of discriminatory language being JUST WRONG isnt enough then I dont want you watching my content to begin with! And to my bipoc audience, Im so sorry that you guys have to put up with this like every month or so and I cant thank you guys enough for helping me call this out. I appreciate you guys so so much. Ill talk about this more on stream soon.

[the-s1lly-corner]

Helloooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo I just saw your "CReepypastas walking the reader home" post, and I was wondering if you could do that again with some more characters! You can choose who :}

Various crps walking the reader home (part 2)

when the questionable and/or evil character does something good for someone else simply because they felt like it with no strings attached, my beloved trope characters: jeff the killer, eyeless jack, slenderman, bloody painter notes: reader is gn, you and the crp arent dating but youre at least on friendly terms, youre being followed home by someone, written on mobile cws: harassment/stalking from the person following you home, canon typical violence

JEFF THE KILLER

Honestly, it's only a matter of time before Jeff turns around and attacks the person following you, if his presence alone isnt enough to deter them

And hes not going to hold back- the chance of the person not making it out alive is high

Even before he loses it he makes it very clear that hes not too fond of the situation- loudly talking about how some people are creeps.. funny coming from him, someone widely known as a killer

Even using that as an out for the person.. not that it matters much, because as soon as you're home hes going to dip and find the person

SLENDERMAN

He doesn't even need to walk by your side to scare the person off- any normal person would turn around and flee at the sight of a tall faceless creature

And if they dont? He has his other ways...

Walks near the sidewalk, but still away from the street lights. But it doesnt matter, if he feels you're in any danger he can use his arm to pull you to his side

He hardly has to lift a finger to scare off the person, but the offer of him staying until your mind calms is still there

EYELESS JACK

To most he just looks like a weird guy in a mask and hoodie so he might not.. be the most intimidating to most, but having claws and sharp teeth come in handy if the person decides to escalate

And when they do? The person goes from trying to make a lunge at the two of you, to sputtering on the ground grasping their throat. Claw or scalpel, it doesn't matter

He doesnt even want to harvest anything from the corpse- usually hes so firm on that, waste not want not- but god... the air was so uncomfortable that it left a sickly feeling in his mouth...

If you want him to come inside with you when you make it home, he will stay for a while

BLOODY PAINTER

He doesnt want to kill them if he doesn't need to, they're not worth the time or effort.. he walks close next to you in new silence- you're the one left to fill it

What words he does say are said loudly and are a veiled warning for the person a few paces behind the two of you

His voice is.. cold, and leaves zero room to believe hes not making a promise- he will hurt someone if they get too close, the flick of light reflecting off of his partly concealed knife pushes it

He lingers around your house the next few nights to make sure everything is fine, as well as around your place of work

[gfdazai]

IT'S LOVE, IT'S ROMANCE.

* Being in a relationship w/ them.

* CW / Established relations, GN reader (I thinkies,) not proofread / edited, I'm making this up as I gooo! Sorry if this is OOC, it's been a wwhile since I've genshided?... Genshinend?.... Yknow. this isnt good im ngl. SO RUSHED this is . unbelievable. It's all over the place but

Ningguang, who showers you with anything that you look at when going window shopping. She doesn't even think twice about the price — despite your refusals, and complaints — she gets you to accept it eventually.

Ningguang, who lets you do her hair as a sign of love. She's a busy lady, it's basically a proclamation of love when she spares enough time for you to sit down, comb her hair and braid it, if you're lucky enough.

Ningguang, who hunts out almost every Qingxin when you say one is pretty. Ningguang, who pays for a crate of cecilias when you say you wished they grew in Liyue.

Beidou,, who brings you back stuff from each of her voyages! ! You say you'd like some fabric from Inazuma? Done. You want wine from Mondstadt? Done, even quicker!

Beidou, who collects shells for you from each shore she comes across. All her treasures (shells), are taking up at least 3 drawers. You don't have the heart to stop her, as she seems so happy when she brings you another pouch everytime she's home...

Beidou, who schedules a whole day for cuddling before she leaves. She refuses to take you with her — scared of you getting hurt, or something — so she spends as much time with you as she can. She forces you to clear your schedule to stay in bed with her all morning, not caring if you had a meeting with whoever, wherever.

Lisa,, who constantly uses you as a guinea pig for her potions. You wanna spend time with her? Okay, just drink this!! Of course, she'd never let anything harm you, she only gives you the potions with the silly side effects.

She'd constantly tease you, calling you petnames that not even the flirtest would think of, just for the amusement of seeing you flustered. If you tease her back, though? It's like a compitition of who get's more flustered first. It's gotten so bad, to the point of the library emptying out because of it.

Lisa, who doesn't even spare you from her punishments as a librarian! Oh, you forgot to give her the book last night? No, no, that simply won't do! She can't be stopping her job for her pretty thing, no, not even for you. ...At least she apologizes afterwards.

Furina,, who 'makes' (gets someone else to make) sweets for you. She somehow knows exactly what you want, and exactly when you want it.

She'd also let you sit in on tea parties, right next to her. She'd make you a little hat like her own, like her own little claim on you, making you sit there and look like her pretty little thing.

Furina, who gets flustered the moment you imply going anything romantic. Holding hands? Not that bad, it'll get her a little flustered. Kissing? She feels like she's having a heart attack after the first kiss the two of you share.

She'd get Neuvillette to get you plushies, preferring to stay with you as he goes to find whatever animal she requested this time. She'd get jealous if you picked a plushie to have in your arms instead of her, whining and wiggling around in the bed until you replace the plushie with her.

Please don't steal my work, nor feed it to any sort of AI. Thank you! ♡

[onskepa]

Can I get a Jake sully x daughter reader.

where the reader was Jake's first child who he left on earth when he went on Pandora. Years later, Jake is finally reunited with his daughter, the one thing he hand longed for, but he finds out that she works for the RDA and is alongside Quaritch. I kinda want this to be a series cause I've been looking all over for fics like this but there are barely any at all.

Gotta admit, this one was a toughie. Not that I'm complaining, I enjoy a challenge. Now I did think long and hard where this would take place. Hope fully this is is good! enjoy!

NOTE: I had to change things around considering the time line and not everything will be down to the T compared to the movie.

Left behind series

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Left behind

Neytiri was enjoying her peaceful night with her two children, neteyam and kiri and her beloved mate jake. As she holds neteyam, while jake was holding kiri but he had a distant look into his eyes. Neytiri knows that look. It is a look where he is mentaly absent and wonders somewhere deep in his mind.

Doesn't happen often, and whenever it does, its about his past. Neytiri knows some of it but doesn't know all. Not that she minds. In fact, she encourages that he forgets his past. All of it.

"ma'jake" she softly calls out to him, placing her hand on his cheek, bringing his attention to her, bringing him back to the moment. Jake humms, paying attention to her. "whatever it is...its all in the past. Forget it, leave it behind. You are here with me and our children. You belong here with me" she says, letting her soft voice soothe his mind.

Unknowns to neytiri, it was the biggest mistake she will ever make.

Neytiri was holding spider, her blade at his throat. In front of her, the demon of her nightmares, Miles Quaritch stands in a false na'vi body doing the same with kiri.

"do it, he aint mine" Quaritch says, no hesitation in his voice. In fact, he was grinning as if to encourage neytiri. This isn't what she wanted. She wanted to strike fear into his heart. Have him feel what she is feeling.

"he doesn't care if I die!" spider tells neytiri. Normally she would ignore him but this time, she couldn't. "You don't care for your own child!?" she screeches. The demon grins in a twisted way. "As far as I am aware Mrs. sully, he isnt my child......but she is"

"MOM/NEYTIRI LOOK OUT!!" Kiri and jake shout to her.

It was quick, it was swift, neytiri couldn't block it in time. A shadow lunged behind neytiri, kicking her behind the knees and body slamming her with full force bringing her and spider down.

Neytiri was quick, fangs out, hissing out in anger only to be met with a gun at her face. She looks up and she sees a young woman. Tall, tough looking, her expression cold and deadly. But one thing stood out, and that was her eyes.

Her eyes were blue.

The same blue eyes jake once had in his human form.

"please! please don't hurt her!!" spider crawled up in front of neytiri as means to protect her. He didn't care of neytiri was threatening his life moments ago, she was not someone he wished death upon.

"quaritch p-please...!! tell her to step down or something!!" spider begged. But the man simply grinned. "you said a child for a child isnt that right Mrs. Sully?" Quartich teases.

kiri had enough and bit his arm making him let go. She ran to her dad but a bullet barely scrapped her shoulder making her shout in surprise.

Jake looked at the young woman who was facing them and time stopped for him. The blue eyes.....he knows those eyes better than anyone else's. Cause they were his own.

"Fair trade I say jake. My child for YOUR child"

Neytiri and the kids were shocked. Jake looked as though he was stabbed a million times.

"daddy? daddy who is that?!" tuk asks as she tugs his hand. Kiri, spider and neytiri also wanted to know.

"she is my daughter" jake says. The daughter he loved. The daughter he cherished with his life. The daughter he left behind for Pandora.

The girl stared at him with nothing but hate and malice.

"not anymore" was what came of her mouth, her voice void of emotion, cold and distant.

"My name is Proto Quaritch, and I am Miles Quaritch's daughter!"

Ngl I feel like I could have done better. I can see this being a series but I got three in the works. This will have to be temporarily be in the shelf until I am done with one of the series. Anyways, I hope ya'll like it!

[nicksbestie]

hi :3333

maybe johnnie looking after his autistic gf [fem reader] after a hard day at work, like shes overstimulated/overwhelmed n tearful & quiet? and maybe asking jake for advicebc johnnie isnt sure how to help[?]

u dont have to stick to that exactly, feel free to swap their roles around or change a part if it makes it easier to write :3

i loved this prompt <3 i hope i did it justice!!!

Work Day

warnings : none!

pairing : jake/reader (platonic) johnnie/reader (romantic)

word count : 1141

There were a lot of hardships that came with being disabled, and nobody knew that better than you did. It was even worse when it was a disability that wasn’t always visible to the naked eye, because outsiders would doubt the struggles that you faced every day, as if they weren’t real because they couldn’t see them. However, this didn’t mean that nobody saw your hard moments, they were just reserved, as much as possible, for the closest people in your life. 

Like tonight, when you had just sped home from work, desperate to be back in a familiar setting, and had nearly stormed in the door, unintentionally slamming it behind you. You had been through what was possibly your worst day in a long time. Everything had bothered you, even the things that you were normally fine with. You had forgotten how to do some of the work that you needed to know how to do to finish a project which had a fast approaching deadline, and you had piles of other things to complete which had fueled you being incredibly stressed. That had been the start to you being incredibly overwhelmed, and every little thing that piled on after that had made you feel like sobbing and screaming in frustration at the same time. 

Finally getting home, you threw yourself down on the couch, screaming into the cushion before going completely quiet, the tears that you couldn't let out at work coming out of your eyes now. Had you known that your boyfriend was home, and no more than one room away, you would have skipped the screaming part, but you couldn’t take it back. You noticed that he ran out of his room as soon as he heard you, eyes worried when he spotted you laying on the couch, staring at the ceiling, but not really seeing anything. 

“What’s going on?” 

The concern was evident in his voice, but you just didn’t have the energy to talk, so you just slowly shook your head, crying. Though your relationship was relatively new, you knew that Johnnie understood what your silence meant, and you knew you probably wouldn’t be speaking much for the rest of the night. Luckily, the couch was wide enough for two, and he laid down next to you, quiet as well. 

“Awful day?” 

You nodded, not really moving much else of your body, despite him being so close to you. You would’ve normally immediately curled into his side, and the fact that you didn’t was really a testament to how bad you were feeling. Not having the same struggles, Johnnie often felt rather helpless when it came to your bad moments, but he was always there. He just didn’t always know how to help. He was learning, and he was taking in every new part of you with stride, and doing everything he could. However, sometimes, you just needed someone who fully understood you, and Johnnie knew that too. There wasn’t any jealousy there, simply understanding and love. 

“Do you want me to call Jake and ask him if he can come over for a little while?” 

You nodded again, knowing that he was going to ask that, and being incredibly grateful for it. You loved your boyfriend, more than you could put into words, but there were times when you needed someone that didn’t need you to fully explain what was going on for them to understand. Plus, you weren’t feeling very verbal, so it would be a lot easier for someone who could relate to verbalize your feelings to Johnnie. Johnnie gently laid a soft kiss to the top of your forehead, pulling his phone out of his back pocket to make the phone call. Due to the fact that Jake and Johnnie don’t talk on the phone all that often, Jake picked up quickly, immediately concerned. 

“Hey, is everything okay?” 

“Not really, but I’m okay. It’s her, she’s struggling today and I don’t really know how to help.” 

You could practically hear Jake’s expression, knowing it was one of empathy. You’d seen it in person too many times to count. 

“Oh no. Do you want me to talk to her?” 

“She’s not speaking right now. Do you mind coming over? Are you busy?” 

Jake laughed down the phone line, but there was no cruelty behind it. 

“Of course I’m not busy. Even if I was, I’d cancel. I’m on the way over. Am I on speaker?” 

“Yeah, you are.” 

You could hear the sound of Jake getting into his car, and knowing that the two closest people in your life that you cared the most about were willing to drop everything to help you made you want to cry and smile at the same time. As he drove, he asked various questions, having a general idea of what was going on, but still wanting to fully understand before he attempted to help. By the time he arrived at your house, you were wrapped up in your weighted blanket, curled up next to Johnnie, noise canceling headphones over your ears. Johnnie gently tapped you, alerting you to Jake’s arrival without scaring you because you couldn’t hear the door opening. 

You knew they were talking to each other because you could see Johnnie’s lips moving, and you could pick up a lot of the words, but didn’t really care too much to insert yourself into the conversation. A lot of it was Jake explaining why you had shut down, why you didn’t want to talk, because it felt like it cost you too much energy, and how both of them could help. After a couple of minutes of speaking to Johnnie, Jake moved more into your eyesight, waving, and offering a gentle hug. Taking him up on the offer, he wrapped his arms around you, squeezing tightly for a little bit of deep pressure therapy before letting go and sitting down on the opposite side of you. 

A fact about your relationship with Jake was that due to the often moments of you both becoming nonverbal, or semi verbal, each of you were fluent in ASL. Johnnie was learning, but not completely fluent yet, and you and Jake began having a conversation of your own. Upon learning that you hadn’t eaten since breakfast, he asked Johnnie if he would mind getting up to get you some food and he could continue talking to you, which, of course, he didn’t mind at all. He immediately got up to get your comfort foods, and you and Jake continued to talk about how you were feeling, and what they could do to help. At the end of the conversation, all three of you ended up just spending a lot of quiet quality time together, watching some shitty comedy on TV and making a bad day a lot better.

[honeytonedhottie]

trusting and betting on urself⋆.ೃ࿔*:･🫧

keep promises that u make to urself : just like how if u know someone who continuously makes promises to do something, yet they never act upon it, you won't trust that person or believe them if they promise u something else. this is also the same with urself. ur new years resolutions? ur goals that you've had for a while but never ever did? all those promises that you've made to yourself and the ones that you haven't followed up on will lessen trust with urself. do what u say you'll do. "stand on business" and if u know that u won't be able to deliver or do what u say you would, dont say it. dont tell urself promises that u won't be able to keep. once u start keeping ur own promises, you'll start to build trust within urself.

hold yourself accountable : just a quick disclaimer but when i say holding urself accountable i do NOT mean punishing urself!! when u find urself falling into old and fruitless patterns you need to hold urself accountable and make sure that u straighten up. the thing about our relationship with self is that a relationship needs BOUNDARIES. you need to set boundaries with urself. what will u or what will u not do? ur non-negotiables?

and when u find urself crossing boundaries within yourself take the BIGGEST step back. the key to forming a healthy relationship with urself is to balance being strict and gentle with urself. strict in the sense that ur the only one that can get u to where u wanna be, and gentle in the sense that ur best won't look the same every single day and u should also listen to urself and what u want, without having to compromise on ur boundaries. kind of finding that middle line is important, bcuz when we're too lenient with ourselves, we get too comfortable and that leads me into my next point...

where growth begins : u cannot expect to grow if ur too comfortable and honestly, this is why most people stay stagnant. its bcuz being comfortable FEELS GOOD. but growth will almost never happen when ur comfortable, on the contrary growth can only happen outside of ur comfort zone. if u want better things for urself, ur simply gonna have to DO BETTER.

the importance of ur self concept : even if ur not familiar with or u dont practice conscious manifesting/law of assumption, i think that working on ur self concept can still be such a fruitful thing to do. i say this because self concept is the way that u view urself in relation to ur desires/goals. its seeing urself as worthy and powerful, and truly grasping ur potential to do great things. a way to start with ur self concept is with affirmations! start telling urself about urself in a positive connotation. you're unstoppable <3

putting it into practice : start small, challenge urself a little bit every day. do one hard thing a day, doing so will build ur confidence bcuz u won't be so daunted by ur big goals when you've already done so many hard things. when u see something challenging instead of thinking "oh i can't do this" you'll have confidence in urself and what u are capable of. oftentimes when we have goals, we kick ourselves out of rooms before we've even tried to get in them bcuz we think "im not good enough" or "im not worthy" which isnt true at ALL. dont shoot urself in the foot. thats self sabotage. and thats not hot.

motivating urself : if u remind urself of your "why" then you'll have reason to stay consistent and truly try. i recommend asking urself the tougher questions, like "what do i want out of my life?" or "am i truly happy and if not what can i do to get there?" once you've decided what u want out of life make a VISION BOARD and actively pursue your dreams. u can't actively pursue something if u dont know what it is. so i advise u to remind urself whenever u feel that u need it of your "why", your driving cause. having that motivation, and actively pursuing and keeping the promises that u make to urself -> will then build ur confidence in yourself to the point where your betting on urself bcuz u know that no matter what cards you are dealt, you'll prosper.

so just to wrap things up, an overview ; start keeping ur promises -> be strict -> get comfy being uncomfy -> say ur self concept affirmations -> apply -> remind

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

WIBTA if I were to report my ex friend's antisemitism to their university?

So I 20nb have been friends with most my current friend group since we were 11. Two years ago I stopped being friends with a guy in my friend group due to toxic behavior on his part (not antisemitic yet, just giving background info) He would constantly say things like "don't make fun of neurodivergent people's special interests and hyperfixations as they can't help it" and then would go and make fun of my special interests (note: said ex friend has ADHD). Over our friendship he had a lot of double standards like that and one day I had enough. The first time I brought it up he dismissed it as someone else in the friend group did the behaviors I'm accusing him of. I kinda dropped it as I didn't want to deal with that level of denial and thought that if I waited a few days he would have had some time to reflect. So I brought it up again and he continued to blame it being one of our other friends doing it and that I was simply "misremembering". I gave specific examples and rough time frames yet he continued to deny it. All I wanted was a simple "I'm sorry and I will work on that" yet he refused to do that. So I ended our friendship.

Since then we have been on rocky terms. We are still in the same friend group since the issue was between me and him, I didn't want to involve my friends and make people pick sides. He was moving away soon at the time of the end of our friendship so it wasn't like I was going to see him when the friend group all hung our together.

Since we are still in the same friend group, he is in the discord server our friend group has which is just like a massive group chat with things categorized into topics.

Recently there is the current conflict going on in Israel and Palenstine. I am Jewish and vented to the vent section of that discord server about how I have seen people I know irl post online antisemitic things. I am very much against Israels actions and made sure to include that in my vent so no one coukd twist my words. I didn't initially say exactly what I was seeing as I was still processing the fact that I was going to have to cut some people off.

He then replied to my vent saying that he has never seen anything antisemitic online and that if he has, he has seen Jewish people saying that it isnt. I replied that his reply to my vent was weird and that i was talking about people saying that all jews should die. I felt hurt as yet again he was being hypocritical towards me as he has said before that you should say that (what he said) when people complain about seeing hateful things towards a group (eg racism, homophobia, etc).

He then responded that I was only calling him antisemitic because he was arab. The thing is, I never called him antisemitic and I myself am also arab. (Yes I know, most people have never met an arab jew but we do exist).

I pointed out that I never called him antisemitic and I am also arab which he seems to have forgotten. I said that his response was still weird considering what he has said in the past about people who say what he said. I then invited him to dm me privately to discuss things further if he wants to as it's not fair to do this in front of all of our friends.

He did not respond and ended up blocking me on discord.

This irked me quite a bit but in the end I decided that him blocking me was for the better if he stands by his original response. I was talking to my partner about it who is not Jewish and he said that my ex friend's response was definitely weird and the fact that he was so quick to defend himself about being called an antisemite without even being called it was indicative that he probably is. I decided to look at my ex friends tumblr to see if there was anything to suggest that and there was. I saw a few posts which he has recently reblogged which used anti Semitic dog whistles like the echo, example: (((insert text you which doesnt say jew but you are implying jewish people are))).

I was quite appalled to see that and am debating if I should send it to his university. The university he attends has spoken out about antisemitism before and has kicked out people in the past for using racist dog whistles due to a potential danger to POC students so it is likely that he would get kicked out for using antisemitic dog whistles.

In my mind, he fucked around and therefore should find out aka face natural consequences for his actions.

WIBTA if I contacted his University about his antisemitism?

What are these acronyms?

[kiruyeen]

rambling abt my danny johnson hcs bc I dont have anything better to do

alright so the fog most definitely changed everyone in it, but while most of them are for worse, Danny for better, actually. not for the "hehe I can mutilate people without worrying abt consequences" part. by all means I believe danny would get bored. of the same methods of killing, sacrifing, stalking for short periods, the same realms, same victims, etc. Danny, as patient as he can be while stalking, is a thrill seeking man, and only human, whether he likes it or not.

but this is a key part of him actually getting to explore who 'danny johnson' is. he spent his entire life putting on masks, physical or metaphorical, that he has no idea who 'danny' is otherwise, and this would give him a chance to explore, since, well, being painfully average isnt any advantage to him here and he has nothing better to do since he cant focus his attention on stalking and studying other people. when theres no one left to study, one is forced to study themselves.

he could actually grow out his hair, give himself stick and poke tats (maybe with the help of the legion, who knows), grow a beard to see if he likes it (I dont think he would), etc.

going from this, if he forms genuine bonds with anyone (especially any survivors) bc yk what else is left to do, he could actually, just maybe, open up about his past and realize oh fuck, that shit wasnt healthy or normal at all. I dont think itd fix him, but itd give him a better understanding of himself. I dont think he would ever upon up about this if it wasnt for the fog.

similarly I dont think he'd form any romantic bonds with anyone if it wasnt the fog as well, I fully believe danny used to cut himself off (more accurately, cut THEM up) as soon as he felt his feelings for anyone would get in the way of his mission. I dont think he even recognizes romantic love anymore. the difference in the fog is, well, you cant get rid of your problems by murdering them here bc they just come back like a boomerang.

he semi-canonly has NPD (as in the devs called him a bit narcissistic once and I stuck to it like a starving leech) and I most definitely believe he has the symptoms, as a lack of a sense of self is common with NPD anyway. I never wanna think too much abt this since I have a deeply set fear of misrepresenting already stigmatized disorders esp due to not having NPD myself but I will say, 1, he definitely has an internal hierarchy but the way he feels abt those above and below him are different than you'd assume, and 2, he would have been a murderer regardless of his npd and the npd has nothing to do with him becoming a murderer, it does influence it naturally yes bc its a PERSONALITY disorder but its not what makes him evil yk. its the ritualized abuse he went through all his life with the explicit intent to make him the way he is.

other, small stuff

so since the entity can and does change a few things with the killers, I love to think Danny has tapetum lucidum in his eyes, like a cat, to see better in the dark, esp beneath the mask's eyes.

the way his costume's... strap.. tentacle... things work is similar to a cat's tail as well. swishing furiously when upset, resting naturally when calm, curling slowly when curious etc. it makes it a little bit easier to guess how hes feeling with the emotionless mask on, for the theoretical audience at least.

he's actually not a fan of physical contact, unless it is to cause discomfort to or fluster someone. he's simply not used to it, but he will tolerate it when necessary. he's likely just touch starved but doesnt recognize the sensation, though.

he would not care enough to label his orientational identity but it'd definitely be pan and somewhere on the a-spectrum.

returning to the only getting to know himself after the fog bit, he'd probably realize hes at least a little bit gender queer. (I also love trans man danny headcanons I just cant seem to make it fit with my other hcs)

alr thats abt it I believe. feel free to share ur ideas as well I love reading abt different interpertations for a character esp when it is the silly sopping wet cat that is danny

[mysterious-ocarina]

amazing work! consider this… gn reader is chuuyas coworker who’s emotionless and keeps their distance from him and their colleagues… chuuya starts to like them but doesn’t know how to bridge the gap…. and on a mission with chuuya, (there was only one bed!!) an asphrodiac gets put in their drink… so they come to him begging him to help them because they don’t know what to do… and fluff and smut ensues!!

Because You Want Me To (NSFW)

Chuuya Nakahara x fem!reader

A/N Im so sorry, i really meant to keep it gn but then i just got caught up with the feminism idea cuz i mean come on, theres no way chuuya isnt a woman respecter. I also was not sure how to write gn smut. If you dont like it, i can totally write it again but definitely gn and less feminism involved. Pls lmk also pls tell me what termonology to use for. . . certain body parts cuz lately everything just sounds wrong

please give me recommendations for books to use as abilities or just abilities in general for bsd content

Main Masterlist BSD Masterlist Requests AO3

(4.0k words)

Sitting hunched over your desk filling out paperwork was getting real old, really quick. You sighed as you leaned back in your chair. Some may call you a workaholic but you were simply strong-willed and determined. Growing up the way you did, you learned to be very independent and how to make your own spot in the world. You joined the Port Mafia at the age of sixteen and have worked the hardest you could to be the strongest.

Your ability did not give you a fighting advantage but you did have a clairvoyant advantage. You were able to speak to animals and your pet raven was your second pair of eyes and ears. It was a normal occurrence for people to see you walking around the halls with Ace clinging to your shoulders. More often than not, he was your partner on missions considering you preferred to work alone.

Becoming an Executive to the Port Mafia was hard work but there wasn’t anything that you would allow to stand in your way. You were very feared and very respected, which is exactly how you like it. You only conversed with your coworkers when it was needed. You were here to do your job, not make pointless relations with coworkers. It was pretty easy for you to avoid interactions with most people in the Port Mafia. The only exceptions were the boss and the other executives, one in particular.

Chuuya Nakahara was. . . different. You weren’t really sure what it was (you do but you’re in denial) but there is something about him that makes him more bearable than anyone else in the mafia that you’ve met. Whenever you were paired together for missions, which was pretty often, he always pulled his weight. There were times when you were paired with people who just wouldn’t do the job they were assigned to do because of egos or whatever. It bothered you to no end when you had to pick up their slack. Chuuya was a great mafioso and incredibly strong which was something you greatly respected.

You still did your best to avoid him, outside of missions. There was no reason why someone, let alone a man, should distract you from your job.

Ace squawked next to you, breaking you from your thoughts. Is something the matter?

You chuckled, thinking about how your best friend was a raven and that he knew you well enough. You brushed him off, “Nothing’s the matter.”

Ace left the perch by the window and landed on your armrest. He nipped your arm with his beak before squawking again. I bet I know exactly what you're thinking about.

Stupid bird, you thought as you glared at him. “Shut your beak.”

Ace climbed to your shoulder as a knock was heard on your office door. You muttered "come in" before Chuuya made an appearance. He walked in, fashionable as ever, and closed the door behind him. He looked a bit fidgety and you had to stop yourself from asking him if he was okay. It was none of your concern.

“I’ve got good and bad news,” Chuuya said as a greeting, straight to the point, something that gave him a point in your head, not that you were keeping track of stuff he did that you liked.

You raised your eyebrow at him, motioning for him to continue. He sat down and placed his hat in his lap. Pulling a small bag from his jacket pocket, he dumped an assortment of nuts in a bowl on your desk for Ace. You tried really hard to stop a smile from covering your face but your lips slightly curled up. A point for him.

Ace hopped from your shoulder, squawking. I like him.

Your smile faded at his smug tone, snapping, “Well, no one asked for your opinion.”

Chuuya gazed at the both of you, “Does he not like them?”

“That’s not it. You had news?” you questioned, changing the subject.

Immediately Chuuya got serious and professional. Another point. “Yes. The good news is that we have a mission together. Just simple intel gathering.”

You were glad it was only intel and not a fight because you weren’t in the mood to fight anyone. That doesn’t mean it would go smoothly. If you weren’t careful, intel gathering could turn nasty incredibly quick. You stared back at Chuuya, “What’s the bad news?”

Chuuya looked at you, apologetically, “We’ll need to stay overnight and I know you hate overnight missions. The event we are going to is hours away and by the time it’s over, it will be too late at night to get back. Mori already booked us a hotel room.”

You sighed and ignored the fact that he knew you wouldn’t be happy. Rubbing your temples, you asked, “When are we leaving? I’ll read the files in the car.”

That’s how you found yourself, riding passenger in one of the mafia’s cars. The back window was open for Ace to come and go as he pleased, something Chuuya did before you had to even ask. Another point. You spent the entire drive reading over the files for subjects and information you were supposed to be looking for tonight. You could tell that Chuuya wanted to talk to you as a way to pass the time but you kept your head in the files, refusing to let him distract you.

You joined the mafia around the same time as him but you never interacted with him, or anyone for that matter. It wasn’t until you were both executives when you would be paired for missions and forced to get to know each other. You didn’t hate getting to know him but you kept the talk about yourself to a minimum.

When you first became an executive, there were rumors going around that you had slept with the boss to make it to where you were. You know, the typical rumors that follow a powerful woman. The rumors didn’t outwardly bother you, “let dickbags believe whatever they want” you would always say if someone asked you about it. But when you found out that the only people who didn’t believe the rumors were Kouyou and Chuuya, you felt a sense of security in your position. Kouyou understood the difficulty of being a woman in power and Chuuya. . . well you weren’t too sure why he didn’t believe the rumors.

“What?” he muttered. You must have been staring at him for too long because he was looking at you with a red face, embarrassed maybe.

“When I first became an executive, why didn’t you believe the rumors that I slept my way there,” you asked, blunt and intrigued.

He seemed very surprised by your question, stammerings, “I-I don’t know. Why would. . .”

He paused for a bit, seeming unsure what to say. You just stared at him, an impassive expression on your face.

He sighed, keeping his focus on the road instead of you, “Do you really think I’m that immature to believe rumors like that?”

You sensed a little insecurity in his voice but ignored it. You replied, “It’s not like I gave you any reason to believe I wouldn’t. You didn’t know me.”

“You didn’t give me a reason to believe that you would either.”

You paused, unsure of how to respond. Being a woman in a male dominant field was difficult and it seemed that Chuuya understood how baseless those kinds of rumors could be. Another point.

Facing the window, you spoke up, “I didn’t. Just so you know.”

“I know,” he replied without hesitation.

You didn’t fight the smile that formed on your face this time. You just hoped Chuuya couldn’t see it because you were facing the other way.

He did and he will cherish the image forever.

By the time you got to the hotel, you were significantly less unhappy about the assignment you had been given, not that you outwardly showed it. Something about your conversation with Chuuya in the car sparked something within you. Your denial of how much you cared for the red head next to you was melting away. Usually this would bother you but you had a feeling that Chuuya or the feelings you hold for him will not get in your way of your job, which brought you great comfort and security. It looked like Chuuya respected you and your work ethic.

Chuuya grabbed your guy’s bags as you made your way into the hotel and to the front desk to check in.

Politely, you greeted, “Hello, there should be a room reserved for me.”

The pretty receptionist gave you a kind smile and when Chuuya came up beside you, she gave him a sweeter one. She kept staring at Chuuya, making him blush, “What name will it be under?”

Haughtily, you replied, “Ougai Mori. It’s for my partner and I.”

Calling Chuuya your partner wasn’t wrong, he was your partner for this mission. But you knew that the receptionist would take it the wrong way, which brought you a little bit of satisfaction.

She looked at you with a forced smile. She handed you your key cards before dismissing you, “Room 115, it’s at the end of the hall on the left.”

You gave her a smug smile, “Thank you.”

You walked through the hall in search of your room, Chuuya trailing behind you. He walked beside you, giving you a look, “What was that?”

You kept walking, face empty, “What was what?”

“Back there, with the receptionist. You guys were being passive aggressive with each other. Is there some kind of woman thing I'm not understanding?” Chuuya asked, confused.

You briefly glanced at him and shrugged, only replying, “Sure.”

He sighed next to you but decided against asking about it anymore, knowing you wouldn’t answer him how he wanted.

Unlocking the room door, the both of you made your way into.

“Shit,” you explained. The room that the two of you would be staying in tonight only had a single bed.

Chuuya sighed next to you and asked, “Want me to go to the front desk?”

Not wanting him to interact with the receptionist, you shook your head, “No, we can figure it out later. I’m going to shower and get ready for the event.”

Chuuya placed both your bags on the bed and rifled through his, “I’ll get the garment bags from the car with our outfits in them.”

You were already in the bathroom in the shower when you heard Chuuya come back into the room. You also heard a little kawing so you assumed he let Ace into the room. A point.

You spent a lot of time in the bathroom after you finished your shower. In the shower, images of Chuuya were flooding your mind. You had to keep reminding yourself that he was just in the other room and you shouldn’t do anything unprofessional. Even if your cunt prickled with neediness.

Eventually realizing that Chuuya will want to shower too, you calmed your body down and left the bathroom. You had dried your hair and done all of your makeup but didn’t have the dress you were wearing. Covered in only a towel, you walked over to the garment bag on the bed.

While looking at his phone, Chuuya said to you, “That bag is yours. I talked to Mori and it looks like it was an error in the hotel system. He advised that we just keep the room as is.”

Chuuya ran  a hand through his hair, annoyed, and looked up at you. He blushed when he noticed that you were only in a towel and averted his gaze. He muttered, “I can sleep on the floor.”

You glared at the back of his head, “I won’t make you sleep on the dirty floor. We can figure out the sleeping arrangements when we get back. Now go get dressed, I do not want to attract unwanted attention for being late.”

“Yes, ma’am,” Chuuya replied with a smirk. You sighed in faux annoyance with a blush on your face as he silently made his way to the bathroom with his garment bag.

You slipped into the dress. It was tight fitting but not uncomfortable with a slit up your thigh. It was also an alluring shade of red which made you immediately think of Chuuya. For a second, you were curious how he would react seeing you in this dress but you shook the thoughts from your head.

You sat at the desk and mirror set up in the room to do your hair and makeup for the night, taking note that Chuuya seemed to be taking an awfully long time in the shower. You put your brush down and went to the bathroom door to ask if Chuuya was okay. But right before you were going to ask, you heard a sound that had you shutting up and blushing. It sounded like Chuuya was groaning and saying your name.

You backed up until the back of your legs hit the bed and sat down. Was Chuuya. . . masturbating in the shower? Thinking about you, no less? You were thankful that Ace wasn’t in the room to squawk and add to your embarrassment.

You were extremely flustered but flattered that Chuuya thought of you that way. It offered you comfort to know that you weren’t alone in thinking unprofessionally of your partner. Maybe after the mission was over, you would have the chance to talk to Chuuya about the possibility of expanding your relationship. But for now, you need to get your head out of the gutter and focus on your job.

When Chuuya finally came out of the bathroom, he was looking especially handsome in his suit. He stopped in his tracks as he looked at you. When he saw your crossed legs and the slit of the dress exposing your thigh, he thought he might faint. Red in the face he coughed, “You look beautiful.”

You thought it was really endearing that he wouldn’t look you in the eye. “Thank you. You clean up pretty nicely as well.”

You did your best to not stare at him but you could feel the tension between you guys building. You grabbed the necklace you were going to wear and placed it into Chuuya’s hand. “Could you put this on for me?”

You turned around, not waiting for an answer. Chuuya, ever so slowly, wrapped the small chain around your neck and clasped it. He pulled your hair out from under it and set it back in place cascading down your back. His hand lightly grazed your neck and you failed to contain the shivers that went through your body.

You quickly turned back around and ignored the butterflies in your stomach. You stared at Chuuya’s face, finding adoration covering it.

“Let’s go, handsome,” you announced, now nervous of your distracting partner.

“Yes ma’am,” Chuuya repeated, a smile painted on his face. You turned and walked out the door not bothering to hide the small smile that appeared on your face.

-

This had to be the hardest mission you’ve ever been on. Now it wasn’t really intellectually hard, intel gathering was as simple as knowing how to charm others into talking about whatever you wanted. But at some point you couldn’t focus on any conversations you were a part of, Chuuya having to pick up your slack, something that would have bothered you to no end if you didn’t feel the way you did right now.

With his arm around your waist, Chuuya pulled you to one of the tables and chairs scattered about the event. He sat you down and grabbed the champagne glass from your hands, “I wouldn’t pin you as a lightweight.”

Your face was flush and your entire body felt like it was on fire, “I’m not drunk, Chuuya. Something is wrong.”

Chuuya stared at you worriedly but you couldn’t stand to look at him. You could barely stand to have his arm around you and standing so close to you. Anywhere his skin touched yours sent shivers down your spine and the smell of him was driving you crazy. Vanilla and Sandalwood. You clenched your thighs, hoping to relieve the tension that was forming in your bottom half.

“Shit,” you exclaimed when you figured out what happened. Your breathing was extremely labored as you explained, “I-I need you to take me to the hotel. . . and lock me in the room for the night. Some. . . one must have drugged me, I’ll explain more later. Did you get all the information we needed?”

“Yes, we should have everything we need. What’s going on?” Chuuya asked, voice a bit tense.

He put his arm around your waist to help you up and it took everything in you to not moan at the feeling of his touch. You couldn’t muster up the strength to speak as he brought you outside and to the car. He started driving back to the hotel, looking at you every few seconds to see if you were alright. The way he was worried about you was making your head spin with adoration and your thighs clench with lust.

Panting, you replied, “I think someone knew we were there and drugged me as a distraction. I think I’ve been given an aphrodisiac.”

Chuuya stared at your panting and sweaty body, beyond confused, “What kind of drug is that? You better not be dying on me?”

At the hotel, Chuuya brought you back to the room and laid you on the bed. He seemed antsy and a bit annoyed that you weren’t answering him.

You put him out of his misery by explaining, “An aphrodisiac is a drug that. . . in simple terms makes the victim like an animal in heat.”

You writhed in the bed, sweat dripping off of you. You so badly wished that Chuuya would just shut up and take care of your neediest spots but it looks like you won’t get what you want just yet.

Staring at you, a blushing mess, Chuuya questioned, “How do you know that’s what you’ve been given?”

You groaned, annoyed with having to deal with this. Inappropriate thoughts of your partner were flooding your mind and making it almost impossible for you to pay attention to his line of questioning. “Because. . . Chuuya. I can’t get the thought of you and that pretty face of yours out of my head. All I want to do right now is push you down on this bed and ride you until I pass out.”

You basically moaned at the flustered look Chuuya was giving you. After a few labored breaths you spoke up again, “Now. I heard you in the shower so I know you want me.”

Unable to bear it any longer, you stripped off your dress. Now fully naked in front of Chuuya. He coughed again but looked away, “I would only want to have sex with you if it was because you wanted me to and not some drug making you. That’s not fair to you.”

Chuuya turned around and just before he was about to walk away, you grabbed the sleeve of his suit jacket, “Trust me. This is not how I would have wanted this to go but-” you paused, finding the words stuck in your mouth. You moaned again when Chuuya’s fingers slipped into yours, unable to contain yourself, “I really do want you Chuuya. And I know you have enough respect for me to not ruin our relationship or my relationship with my work.”

Chuuya stared at you, flustered and undeniably hard but unsure of what to do. You took the final step by pulling his arm, forcing him to fall on top of you. You grabbed the back of his head to pull him closer to you. He didn’t resist as you slotted your lips into his.

It was a ferocious kiss that was filled with lust, passion, and neediness. You ran your hands through Chuuya’s hair and down his front making him groan into your mouth. You tried to pull the belt from his pants but your hands were too shaky. You whined when he pulled your hands away from him and brought them to rest above you. He used one hand to hold yours in place and the other to undo his pants.

Chuuya chuckled, “If you need me that bad, how come you can’t even get my pants off of me?”

“Stop teasing, please Chuuya,” you begged, moaning when he brought his mouth back down to yours.

Chuuya got off of you and stood in front of you and the bed. He sighed, content, “I’ve been waiting for this forever. I don’t know if it’s obliviousness or stubbornness that kept you away from me.”

You couldn’t help but stare at the man in front of you as he stripped, breathlessly you replied, “A bit of both. . . But no more.”

Chuuya gave you a dazzling smile, climbing back on top of you. He laid kisses down your stomach as he spoke, “No more.”

You whined as he laid kiss after kiss on your body, wanting more. He finally took his hands and soothingly rubbed your thighs, “Do you want me to touch you?”

“Yes, Chuuya. Please just do what you want to me. I’ll take anything,” you begged, desperate to be touched by him.

Instead of teasing you further like you thought he would, Chuuya gets to work pleasuring you. Moving his hands from your thighs, Chuuya brings them to your dripping cunt. Slowly but surely, he presses two fingers into you while rubbing his thumb on your clit.

You writhed on the bed, holding back your moans. Chuuya wouldn’t have that.

“Now, now, princess. I’d like to hear who’s making you feel so good,” Chuuya chided, fingering you faster and harder.

“Chuuya, I’m going to-” you moaned, overwhelmed with pleasure.

He brought his mouth up to your breasts, licking and biting as he went, “It’s okay. You can come.”

His mouth on your body and his permission was the last thing holding you back. You came with a loud scream, convulsing around his fingers.

When you had calmed down and Chuuya pulled his fingers out of you, you grabbed the back of his head to bring his lips to yours. You made out for what felt like ages before Chuuya  chose to break the kiss to speak, “How do you feel now, princess?”

“I feel like, I need you to fuck me. Please, Chuuya,” you begged, pulling his body as close to you as you could. His erection was pressed into your thighs, making you whine in want.

Chuuya groaned and marked around your neck. He whispered, “As you wish.”

Before long, Chuuya was hovering over you and rubbing his cock through your folds. The both of you moaned at the contact before he slipped into you with ease.

He kept still, letting you adjust, until you wiggled your hips to encourage him to move. Any self control he had up to this point all but vanished. Chuuya pounded into you ferociously, coaxing you into a moaning and whining mess.

You were too distracted with pleasure to do anything but moan Chuuya’s name. One hand on your waist to keep you where he wanted, he used his other hand to bring your hands back up over your head.

He brought his lips down to yours to give you a lustful kiss. You struggled to keep up with his pace, too busy moaning, but he didn’t care. With how feral he was being right now, you would have thought that he was the one who was drugged.

Eventually his hips started to stutter, notifying you of both his and your approaching orgasm. Chuuya brought his hand down to your clit, rubbing in time with his thrusts. You blacked out as you came, screaming and overloaded with pleasure. When you finally came to, Chuuya was slowing down his thrusts, still prolonging the pleasure.

When he finally stopped moving and pulled out of you, you could feel his juices seeping out of you. You laid on the bed, too dazed to move, and watched as Chuuya grabbed a wet cloth from the bathroom and cleaned you up.

“I think that was a successful mission. We got what we needed and we finally slept together,” Chuuya joked. You cracked a small smile and chuckled at him. How could you ever think that being with Chuuya wouldn’t go well?

[vensionwithvox]

as someone who is aroace, ive always felt less than human. one of the most prominent aspects of my identity has got to be my aromanticism. the asexuality is definitely there, but it isnt much of a burden to me than the fact that im romance repulsed. mainly because im in my teenage years, and romance is a popular topic amongst my peers at this time around. im constantly surrounded by people who all collectively have one thing on their minds: love. sometimes it feels like everyone around me is brainwashed, with myself being the only exception. its alienating, to say the least. to simply be myself, which is why, when i figured out that i was aroace a few years ago, i couldnt help but be in extreme denial about the reality of it all. i forced myself into relationships at the cost of my sanity. i genuinely believed that if i tried hard enough, changed to the point where i couldnt recognize myself anymore, then it would all work out in the end, so i forced feelings that were never there to begin with and got exactly what i deserved. not only did i hurt myself, but i also hurt those closest to me in the process. even labeling them as ‘relationships’ would be a lie, because if anything, they were failed experiments to see if i could muster up the slightest ounce of love. my selfishness was my own demise. i just couldnt accept that i was defective in a way. if everyone else was born with the ability to love, then why cant i? what makes me different? i didnt want to be different. i just wanted to be normal. and yes, im fully aware that love takes on multiple forms; its not restricted to only romance, but keep in mind that im also aplatonic. love is a basic fundamental of our everyday lives, but not for me.

note: this is my own individual experience. its harsh, but its the truth. also, i didnt expect my first post to be so personal right off the bat, but im currently holding a grudge against society right now.

[etherealkissed88]

i asked you something and you not only were mean, but you are also making fun of me on twitter. i felt so embarrased that i had to delete my account. you made me feel so bad. i did nothing to you. you had no reason to be so mean. english is not my first lenguage so i also have trouble communicating, i understand half of what you post here. karma will hit you so hard.

lets quote what i said “no i dont believe they are possible 🥰 which is why i have a whole page dedicated to manifesting stuff 😍”

this isnt mean, this is sarcasm. you communicate very well actually but heres the thing: i looked at ur account and you repost a lot of loa content. if you read all those posts especially the ones about desired appearance which is what you were asking about, it doesnt make sense for you to ask me “do you believe its actually possible to manifest a desired appearance.”

and do not use your language barrier as an excuse to make me feel bad because i rly dont. if you were so bad at communitcating, you wouldn’t be able to communicate to me both this time and the previous time, plus y would u read and repost loa content if u had an issue w language? i know you understand loa but when ppl keep searching and searching for outside answers and validation, it doesnt get them anywhere. believe me - ive “coached” ppl who repeatedly asked me the same questions over and over again despite my whole account and posts being right there. they still struggle because they only ask questions and never apply.

the same fingers you used to type the question, you could have used those same fingers to scroll thro my page like you did with the other content creators. i get it if you are new to loa (even tho you could have read the content that was already there and even tho u already reposted content answering ur own question) but as someone who creates loa content everyday, its disrespectful from my point of view that i work hard for these posts and ppl dont even look at it and instead ask the most limiting questions ever. its almost like “why would i waste my time w these posts”. if you dont understand this, its bc you arent someone who gets 20 repetitive asks everyday meanwhile their answers being right on my page. it can be stressful and so annoying.

now back to my original answer: “no i dont believe they are possible 🥰 which is why i have a whole page dedicated to manifesting stuff 😍”. if u think this was mean, its bc you knew the answer was yes, it is possible. why else would i have a page dedicated to manifesting if it wasnt possible to “actually manifest a desired appearance”. my answer simply guided you to your own answer and to search my page if you still had (better) questions. what i said was literally not mean😭 and if you still believe so then thats fine bc its never that big of a deal. and i wasnt making fun of u on twitter, i simply said the exact thing i originally answered you with💀

idk if ur a beginner in the law or not but either way, you should know that anything is possible w the law. if u didnt know that, then now you know (and ik you know based on ur reaction to my original answer). and karma isnt real so it will not “hit me hard”🥶

im sorry if you rly have a language barrier issue but from my pov, that was the best, most appropiate reply i could have given. even other loa content creators can agree bc they know how ppl can get in their asks inbox. reread this whole thing if theres still an issue.

and dw u can just make another account like you did just now🤭

[trainingdummyrabbit]

which character ya wanna post about? (invitation to go off)

ouuHGUHUGHHG ive been rotating this around for hours bc ive redirected myself like 5 times since u sent it but ithink i got it i got it this time. i wanna talk abt porccubus. ok gimme a minute gimme a minute

so like. i know theyre technically the same thing, across lobcorp/ruina, but i really really wanna dissect the weird contrast it has going on there. (though, isuppose, their "same"ness is kinda up in the air re:abnos, considering there was a librarian snippet abt child of the galaxy being more "vicious", but wwwwwweh [waves hands around])

so like. the thing about lobcorp porccubus is that its just. an odd fucking creature. like yeah obviously, but its about the way its perception seems to weave around it. its core themes, that of pleasure and euphoria, uncontainable and uncontrollable, would imply that its something impulsive, stimulation-seeking, something that is driven wholly by desire and would be difficult to pin down. however, the way that its logs and flavor text are written give off a much more... subdued vibe, for lack of better words to describe it.

it is the source of that elation, yes, but everything in the way it holds itself is so withdrawn. it simply floats there, yes, but there is little to no mention of it making any moves of its own (which, now that i recheck its info log, is also mentioned plaintext!) and its in-work flavor text seems to speak with the tone of someone Studying it, Speaking about it, rather than observations of its movements or descriptions of its mindset. its all very distant. speaking in third person to someone who is listening. ...right?

which is to say: whats wrong with this dog. its story implies direct exploitation yet it just… it Just. its some strange little animal. its not malevolent and trying to kill people for fun. but it also isnt all sad like petals plucked from a daisy. it just Is. it has almost the same sort of feel as some sort of object. and yet it is clearly alive. does it have a will? it must; as abnormalities Do. so what is it? it functions by its own rules and just kinda Goes Here. does it want? does it need?

porccubus itself acts more like a Service or Trade than an actual creature. you walk in and interact with it, and it knows what to do in response. game of trust - it does a little song and dance as is its nature, yet doesnt seem to desire much more.

which also brings me to the shackle-- the little necklace around its neck. it speaks about how it was chained up, for whatever reason, and yet nobody seems to have any idea why. and porccubus... just doesnt seem to mind it. never mentions it. its such a particular type of indifference. (i suppose another good question is what is it shackled to?) and even further still... what does it mean that the ego gift it grants Is that necklace?

lc!porccubus as a creature is laced with restraint. both in a literal sense, And in an internal sense. pleasure and euphoria, yet it is definitively restrained. it cannot reach out first. it does not act on its own, but rather waits for something else to reach out First. even when it breaches, it (according to what im reading,) simply... waits. waits for an approach. (you Must approach it. it has to be a Choice.) theres something very Aimless about it, mechanical almost. i cant really sum it up in any way other than That Is An Animal.

...which brings a very interesting contrast between It and its Ruina counterpart. in the library, its much more Jubilant. it speaks, for one, which is something i straight up didnt know it did for a while. the way that it presents itself outwardly is much more outspoken-- inviting, wanting someone to engage, trying to persuade that first step. it yearns! pet it! it wants to share what it has to give, but it still wants that hand of yours offered to it First. its happy! its happy! come be happy with it!! dance with it, play with it! its demeanor is so much more forward, more present... more conscious.

and crucially... that shackle is no longer tied about its neck. rather, it dangles loose from the end of its tail, almost like an accessory rather than something granted/given to it. does this represent the release of former ties? it certainly acts more free than it did before-- whatever was holding it back, is it gone now? is its shift in demeanor the jubilant frolicking of that which has never been able to soar? is this what allows its nature of wishing to share that elation to shine through? much like a dog chained to a stake, finally being set loose in an open field.

in an unspoken turn of events, porccubus seems to focus on Release. release of ties, release of inhibitions, release of that which had been holding you back. it wants nothing more than to give what it is experiencing to those which are weighed down by things that keep them unhappy. and yet, it does nothing to truly alleviate what those woes are, simply covering them up with a layer of unrelenting sweetness.

..............which of course, brings me to angela. yeah yall thought i could go an essay without her?? lol. lmao.

on the floor realization centered around her staunch desire to live, it almost seems to stick out like a sore thumb. with all of the withdrawn mourning and wishing that the rest of the phases share, pleasure is an odd slap in the face, almost. but... it really does make it hit that much harder-- Especially with that which was expanded upon above. the imagery of unshackling yourself from that which held you down, allowing yourself to feel things you never were able to-- never were Allowed to. is that not what she stands for, here?

its reaching towards an open door, trying to grasp to any amount of Living that you can reach-- you deserve that much, at least. at the Very least. you Have to be allowed something. but not only is it that desire, but its also the Ignorance. the understanding that no matter what you mask it with, all that baggage still remains. chasing those short, intense bursts of happiness-- everything else still continues to eat away at what's underneath. and yet, theres still a consciousness to that. even further than that, a commitment.

who cares what becomes of you because of this? this happiness-- this which you were never allowed to so much as dream of-- is right within your grasp. and to taste it for even the smallest of moments, the briefest amount of time-- that makes it worth it. it was all worth it. nothing matters more than this complete devotion to sensation. it doesnt matter if it tears you apart from the inside, this is what you were always looking for. this is what you deserve. and youll do anything to hold onto it.

in some odd way, it really is about rotting.

in conclusion,