#then pizza and movies once we're done

[toksidermy]

got almost everything moved over to the new apartment today except furniture and necessities. did some laundry at the new place (it's coin-op at the current apt and my neighbors laundry has been in the washer for 3 days), organized the kitchen a bit. it's really hard to be in the old apartment when I want so badly to be in the new one, the vibes are so much better and I'm excited to have a roommate again.

I also have a plan if this roommate deal doesn't work out or we turn out to hate each other - the same apartment complex has 1 bedrooms so I could just swap to that. realizing that helps my homelessness anxiety a lot! I've moved around so much over the years and usually because I was being asked to leave (sailors getting re-deployed, roommate getting married, owners moving back into the house, etc), I've got a lot of fears about my home suddenly being taken from me without warning, or very little warning.

so going into my 40s will be a new chapter. I'm in therapy, I'm California sober, my financial burdens are about to be lessened greatly. I really want to take advantage of this and upgrade myself for the better, make the next 40 years the best they can be.

here's hoping .

[thirstywoso]

Frustration | Niamh Charles x Reader

A/n: I haven't written a fic in around 7 years but after that "we are Chelsea" episode with Niamh I had to write this. It's not edited and it might not be very good but if you enjoy and want a pt2 or more fics send in your requests

Warnings: smut 18+ mdni

A little angst if you squint, fingering r receiving, oral r receiving, thigh riding, squirting, praise kink and masturbation

Word count: 3k

Let's go

Just like most days you were sat in the passenger seat of your girlfriends Skoda Enyaq, this time on your way to Jessie's new apartment for a bonding night with your other team mates.

Although you had your license Niamh preferred to be the designated driver in your relationship before you'd left your house you did insist to her that you we're more than capable of driving seeing as she had yet to drive around that part of Cobham. Just like you knew she would she declined and slipped into the drivers seat. Sighing defeatedly you huffed into your seat. Your girlfriend just smirking at you handing you the aux.

"Baby, you know you're my passenger princess and you are better at playing the car DJ" Niamh giggled.

"Fine!" You mocked offence.

Once down the road and into unfamiliar territory for Niamh you began to direct her telling her what lane to be in and when to signal even though she had the satnav on. She let you carry on a few times before huffing!

"Y/n/n, I've got it"

You knew she hated backseat drivers but you were just trying to be helpful, after a few moments singing along to one of the songs you had put on you'd all but forgotten not to direct Niamh's driving.

"You're in the wrong lane, Jessie's road is the last exit on the rounda... bout" you mumbled out the last part when you caught her eye and she had that stern look plastered on her face. You suddenly remembered what you had done, Niamh wasn't easily frustrated but you knew that was one of her pet peeves.

You could tell she'd stiffened up slightly where she was trying to keep calm and so you put your hand on her thigh and gave her a soft smile. She softened in your touch and smiled asking you to turn up the music as it was one of your favourite songs playing.

"Turning saints into the sea.." you sang in unison as you pulled up in front of Jessie's apartment noting some of your other team mates cars in the lot.

--

By now you had been at Jessie's for a few hours you'd all watched a movie, had eaten the pizza's you'd collectively ordered and had played some of the games as that's usually what you do at a games night.

You were currently playing Pictionary and you were on a team with Jessie whilst Niamh was with Guro, Aggie was with Cat and Zecira was with Nathalie. You and Jessie were winning by miles whereas Niamh and Guro weren't having as much luck. Yourselves mocking and teasing them, it was then you saw the way your girlfriends jaw clenched that she was genuinely annoyed at herself losing.

"Baby don't worry you'll do better next time" you laughed.

"Yeah baby, maybe we will go easy next time" Jessie mocked.

"Give over Jess, you know I could crush you any day of the week"

"Niamhy it's okay Jess was only kidding"

"Yeah Charles it's all good"

"Whatever, let's play a different game"

It wasn't often you drank considering you were a professional athlete much similar to the other girls in your presence, that's why at team bonding nights you all usually got carried away.

As it was getting later and you'd all had a fair bit to drink, Guro suggested that it would be fun to play a game of truth or dare. Which if it went the way it usually did would end in drama.

"Guro you have to go first as it was your idea, so truth or dare?" You questioned

"Hmm, dare"

After a few seconds of trying to come up with a dare for Guro, Aggie chimes in.

"I dare you to chug the rest of your drink"

"Easy" she retorted after swallowing her mouthful and tipping the now empty bottle upside down.

Zecira seemed slightly bored of the tame dares yawning slightly and took it upon herself to spice things up.

"Let's amp it up a little ladies, Jessie truth or dare?"

"Dare"

"I dare you to kiss y/n for at least 5 seconds"

"But.. Niamh"

"But.. but it's just a game Niamh won't care, will you Niamh"

"Sure go ahead" Niamh said nonchalantly, although when you looked at her to gauge how she was really feeling you could see a tinge of jealous behind the smile on her face.

"Fine"

With that Jessie leant over and pressed a chaste kiss to your lips before pulling away slightly, before she had fully sank back to where she was sitting you pulled her back in for a slightly longer kiss which she reciprocated.

"Finally, that's what I'm talking about"

Zecira always loved in her words to 'liven the party'

After a few more rounds and the feeling of Niamh's eyes burning into you, it was your turn.

"I'm going to go with truth"

Nobody had asked you yet but you had already given licked whipped cream off of Guro's cheek and gave Niamh a lap dance which definitely did not start a fire down below for her and the blush in her cheeks was from the alcohol she was drinking and couldn't possibly be anything else. You saw a smirk appear on Zecira's face and almost regretted asking for a truth.

"Who's a better kisser Niamh or Jessie"

Everyone's heads whipped around to look at you, Niamh almost getting whiplash and Jessie's cheeks burning red. You hesitated to answer because it was such a silly question, well to you at least. You soon realised that maybe hesitating wasn't a great idea because Niamh soon got up and stormed out onto Jessie's balcony.

"Thanks Z"

You went out into the balcony and shut the door, Niamh didn't even turn to look at you, she knew you were there but in the moment she didn't even want to look at you.

"Why'd you hesitate y/n/n?"

"What..? Baby please don't be silly right now. I didn't answer because it's obvious, you're the best kisser out there.. not that I kiss other girls. I mean not that I haven't in the past but you know since you and me, me and you"

Niamh chuckled whilst she turned and cupped your cheek kissing you gently.

"Sweetie shh, I know. I just get jealous sometimes like maybe you could do better than me and Jessie is so amazing and after seeing you kiss earlier it just kind of hit a nerve"

You kissed her again in reassurance

"You know you're cute when you ramble though, I'm sorry I walked out. My emotions are just not as in check as I'd like them to be, what with your backseat driving, losing game night and seeing you kiss my best friend"

"You're just a sore loser Niamhy but you know I only ever want you"

"Well after that lap dance I really want you"

"I'm that good huh?"

"That good" she smirked

"How about we head home and we sort out how emotionally.. and sexually frustrated you are honey"

Niamh didn't need asking twice she grabbed your hand and dragged you back inside. Making some poor excuse about not feeling well and needing to go home and she will make it up to them. With that she shoved you out the door quickly following bundling you into a taxi home.

Your teammates looking at each other knowingly and giggling at Niamh's excuse this time because this happened most game nights.

When you got back home Niamh couldn't unlock the door quick enough, when you finally did get inside you both kicked your shoes off somewhere random on the floor as a tomorrow problem.

Within seconds Niamh had you over her shoulder carrying you to the bedroom, you knew all that extra time she was spending in weight training was paying off.

After kicking the bedroom door closed Niamh dropped you onto the bed making quick work of her clothes and nodding at you to do the same.

Soon both of your sets of clothes were discarded haphazardly on the floor, Niamh signalled for you to move up the bed. You pushed yourself back until your head rested on your pillows and Niamh crawled on the bed above you.

For a second you thought she was having doubts because she hoovered above you staring down admiring the way your lip tucked behind your teeth and your chest heaved with need.

"Baby, if you'd rather not tonight we can cuddle instead"

"NO" she practically yelled

"Sorry, no I want to but I just couldn't help but take you all in, I can't believe you're mine sometimes" admiration dripping off every word.

"Shut up" you giggled and gently slapped her arm. Which flexed under your touch causing your breath to hitch. Niamh smirked knowingly and with that pressed her thigh down into your centre leading to another gasp.

Before long her lips were back on yours deepening the kiss, feeling your tongue run gently against her lower lip. Sighing and relaxing into the kiss. Your fingers scratching gently and the nape of her neck and tangling in the fine hairs there.

Biting your lip and carefully pulling away, her lips attached themselves to your neck slowly trailing up and down sucking on your weak points. Her favourite was just below your ear where your jaw met your neck, she could spend all day there if you let her. Listening to the way your breathing sped up and the small whimpers you made.

Niamh kept her attention there for awhile before sinking lower, peppering your chest with lazy kisses before taking your left peak into mouth and gently sucking and rolling the bud with her tongue. She meant on her elbow and caressed your face whilst swapping to your right breast and paying it the same attention.

Her free hand snaking between your legs making you gasp as she hit the jackpot. Her finger teasingly fuming through your folds causing her to smirk against your chest, mumbling around your nipple causing the vibrations to stir something in your lower stomach.

"So fucking wet for me"

"All for you" your head stretched back against the pillow eyes screwed shut needing more. Tight circles started to be drawn around your clit before gliding back between your folds just before it became too much. She knew your body well and better than yourself sometimes.

Your hands soon found their way into her hair as she kissed her way down your toned stomach and along your inner thighs. She continued to tease you before looking up at you. Two of her digits circling your entrance, she gave you a questioning look which you answered with a small nod.

"Words baby, you know I don't find anything sexier than consent"

"I always want to make sure you enjoy what I do and that you want it as much as me"

"Please Niamhy"

With that she sunk two fingers into you, your back arched slightly and she pressed gentle kisses to your thigh as she worked herself into you. It didn't take long for her to find a comfortable rhythm and it helped with you being so wet.

Then came the sensation of her gently blowing against your clit which made your legs twitch. Before you knew it her tongue was gently aiding her fingers between your legs and darted out of her soft pink lips rapidly as she lapped at your sensitive bud.

Alternating between suckling and flicking her tongue over where you needed her most. More of your juices coated her fingers and with that she slipped in a third which was rewarded with a moan that ripped from deep inside you. Curling her fingers deep inside you whilst you grabbed and her hair pulling her impossibly closer.

"Good girl baby, you're such a good girl for me"

Niamh knew how much you loved being called a good girl during sex and it worked you felt yourself getting closer to your peak.

"That's it baby, you gonna cum for me"

"Pl..please"

"Go ahead"

With a few more thrusts you were coming apart underneath her moaning her name, which she would deny but was a massive ego boost for her.

She then kissed her way back up your body before using her hips to aid in thrusting her fingers harder into you.

"One more please baby"

Before you even had a second to think your eyes went white with pleasure and you felt yourself gush into Niamh's palm.

"Fuckkkkk"

She had the biggest dopiest shit eating grin on her face, so pleased with herself.

"I didn't know you could do that"

"Neither did I" you said shyly

"Please don't be embarrassed, that was so fucking hot"

Kidding you sweetly before asking if you were ready for her to pull out. When you nodded she removed her fingers making your legs twitch slightly as your pussy ached to me touched again after what happened next.

Niamh took her finger into her mouth swirling her tongue around them cleaning every last drop of you off of her digits.

Her lips reconnected with yours before you could even think of something to say, tasting yourself of her lips brought another rush of wetness to your core.

You flipped over your positions straddling Niamh's muscular thigh which she tensed below you. Her hands gently squeezing on your breasts as you ground down. Your sensitive nub bumping along each definition.

"You want more?"

You knew she wasn't judging you and was just more curious about your needs than anything.

"Almost there"

Your hips rutted against her becoming more staggered the closer you got. Collapsing back on top of her after your third orgasm. Groaning in her ear as you came down, only adding to the rush of wetness between her own thighs.

"Your turn" you mumbled sleepily

"Not tonight sweetie you're warm out, let me clean you up"

You didn't argue, you knew she was right and you were too tired to reciprocate. You weren't as worried as you would've been at the start of your relationship because you know that not every time is about give and take and some days it's just better to give than receive and visa versa. Although you'd never turn down your favourite meal. Niamh.

Whilst you were thinking about how lucky you were Niamh came back into the room with a wash cloth and some water for you which you happily sipped as Niamh carefully cleaned you up without trying to overstimulate you.

Once finished you cuddled up under the duvet, entwining your legs with Niamh's only for her to let out a little gasp as your leg connected with her centre by accident.

"What was that?"

"Nnnothing"

"It certainly didn't sound like nothing, you're still worked up aren't you?"

Niamh nodded her head but reiterated that she didn't want any reciprocation because she knew your body was exhausted.

"Fine, I won't touch you but I want you to touch yourself for me"

"Baby no, let's cuddle and get some sleep"

With that you gently cupped her discovering how wet she really was, she rolled her eyes in response.

"Please Niamhy, for me. I want to watch you get off for me"

Niamh didn't make an effort to move.

"It'll be incredibly hot knowing your thinking about me and then tomorrow it's my turn to treat you like a queen"

Niamh sighed knowing you wouldn't let up and knew it would be quicker to get it other with so you could go to sleep.

Niamh slid her fingers between her legs as you pulled back the duvet to watch. Her fingers slipped between her pretty pink lips and sunk into herself. She wasn't one for teasing when it came to herself. She had a job and she wanted to get it done.

"That's it baby add another for me, stretch out that tight pussy for me"

Niamh groaned as she added a second finger her brows furrowing and her lip caught between her teeth as she concentrated on your voice, you wrapped your hand around her wrist so you could feel closer to her enjoying the way her tendons flexed against your fingers with every thrust inside herself.

You didn't know where to look eyes darting back and forth between where her fingers disappeared and the concentrated and determined look on her face.

It didn't take long as she was so worked up

"Please can I cum baby?"

"Hmm I don't know"

"Don't fucking tease me, I'm so close! Please!"

You loved hearing her pleas and beg but tonight you just wanted to see her satisfied.

"That's it baby let go"

Niamh's head snapped back as she released. After a few minutes of catching her breath she disappeared to the bathroom cleaning herself up. She slipped into a pair of your training shorts and one of your old college tees. In return she brought you some of England shorts and a UCLA shirt Jessie had given to her one time after she'd gone back to visit.

She helped you into the clothes before laying down and pulling you onto her chest. Your head resting listing to her chest rise and fall rhythmically, your legs draped over hers. She kissed the top of your head and tucked you both under the duvet.

After awhile you thought she had fallen asleep as her breathing was shallow and steady.

"I love you Niamh"

"I love you too y/n"

"Now get some sleep"

[stevesjockstrap]

Eddie Month day 7

Prompt: Wayne & warm

Wayne knew his nephew had been seeing someone and trying to hide it. He was gone more, smiling more, and if he was being completely honest, showering more. There had even been a few mornings when he’s gotten home from working third shift that he thought Eddie might’ve just snuck someone out of their trailer. He couldn’t be sure of course, but the guilty look Eddie had given him and the quick anxious breathing he had been doing made him think he’d been up to something. There was also a time he'd come home wearing a suspiciously not-his-own jacket that Eddie had gone red-faced and stammery about when asked. Wayne had shrugged it off. He was a nineteen year old boy once, too. He was a little more put out by the fact that his nephew hadn’t told him about this person and instead thought he had to sneak around. 

When he switched days with a guy at work, he maybe forgot to mention it to Eddie.

“You got plans tonight?” He drawled, keeping his voice casual as his nephew came out of the shower with a shirt that wasn’t ripped to shreds (the jeans were still ripped in the knees but he was done trying to have that conversation). 

“Uhhh, yeah, why are you- uh, I mean, it’s Friday, shouldn’t you be at work?” Eddie turned his wide eyes from him to peer out the window anxiously.

“Swapped with Gary for Monday. Your date coming here, then?” 

Eddie’s shoulders slumped. “Fuck, Wayne. How long have you known?”

“Just guessed, it’s been good to see you happy, is all.”

He sat at their tiny dining room table with him, leaning over to hang his head into his hands. “I wasn’t not telling you, I just… didn’t want to get excited over nothing, or, I dunno, jinx it. He's-" His head shot up, his eyes even wider and stared at him like he hadn't meant to say that. Like Wayne hadn't been expecting that or knew his nephew well enough to know the truth since right after he came to live with him.

"He treats you right?" He raised an eyebrow.

"Y-yeah, he does." A small smile appeared on his face.

"That's all I care about. So, do I get to meet him finally?"

"Oh. Um, yeah, sure. Of course. He should be here soon. His parents are home, so, uh-" Eddie looked sheepish again.

"So you were going to be here, and I'm crashing your date. I can clear out, that's no problem."

Eddie looked even more put out, somehow. "No! No way. I'm not kicking you out on your only night off, you can hang out with us, we're just-"

The door opened and one Steve Harrington was standing in his living room staring at him. "Oh. Um, hi Mr. Munson, I was just, uh, stopping by for..." he stared between the two men at the table then finally grabbed the back of his neck anxiously.

"It's okay, Steve, he already knows." Eddie was grinning at him, and stood up to pull his hand away from his neck to hold it. "Guess we weren't being very covert. Uncle Wayne, I know you already sort of know Steve, but uh, this is my boyfriend."

"Good to finally meet you, Steve. I hear you two were supposed to hang out here, and I don't want to interrupt, so I can get out of your hair-"

Steve's eyebrows came together in a frown and he looked at Eddie. "No way, we're not kicking you out of your own house, we're just watching a movie and hanging out. If you want us to clear out, we can, we just- why are you both looking at me like that?"

Eddie and Wayne shared a knowing grin. This boy was good for his nephew, and he could tell he was genuine about his not wanting them to bother him. "That's almost word for word what Ed just told me when I offered."

"Oh. Well, that's good. What do you like on your pizza?"

They spent the evening watching some new horror movie that had come out on tape, the boys snuggled under a blanket on the sofa and him in his recliner. He was sure there were some kisses he didn't catch but other than that it felt calm and casual, like he had pictured any normal family movie night like he'd dreamed about having with his own family. Towards the end of the movie, he looked over and Eddie was asleep with his head on Steve's shoulder. They shared an affectionate smile and Wayne got up to rewind the tape before the static could wake him up.

"He always says he's going to make it 'til the end of the movie, but he never does. That's part of the reason I said it wouldn't matter if you stayed, this was pretty much the extent of our plans."

"It's good for him. And it means he feels safe with you. So, how long has this been a thing?" Eddie chuckled when Steve ducked his head. The kid definitely wore his heart on his sleeve, just like his nephew.

"I don't really know how to give a timeline, we sort of just fell into being friends, then suddenly it became more? We were kind of idiots for a while there." He laughed and when it made Eddie shift closer to him, he stopped with a shy smile.

"It seems like it's going well though," he surmised. 

"I think so. I'm sorry we didn't tell you, and I'm sorry for all the sneaking around. We didn't like it either. Eddie was a mess. There was one day I definitely passed your car because we didn't time it well enough."

Wayne nodded. "Well now you can just spend the night and there won't be any issues." Wayne chuckled again at the look Steve gave him.

"Oh. Um, I mean if that's alright with you. I'd understand, like, I can sleep on the couch, or-"

"When you were sneaking out, were you sneaking out from my couch, son?"

"No, sir."

"None of that, either. You're family now," he waved his hand in the air. "Keep taking care of my boy and I won't make a fuss about where I know you've already been sleeping. Far be it for me to take issue when I've seen how happy he's been."

Steve pulled his arm tighter around Eddie and nodded. "I'm really happy, too."

@eddiemonth @lighthousebeams

[beauty-in-negative-spaces]

Sparda boys Vs. A crush

I saw a few other people do this so I figured I'd give my two cents. I'm hoping to write more often so if there's something you'd wanna see my requests are open :)

------------------------------------------------------------

Dante

While Dante has the reputation of a player, when he starts to fall he falls hard.

It'll start out innocent enough, he thinks about them a lot, will often worry about them when they're away, typical golden retriever man stuff.

He'll always bring them up in conversation or, when talking to them, will bring up him thinking about them.

"Last night I saw this movie, the lead totally reminded me of you-"

Dante will take every chance he can to flirt with them.

Even if they're just passing by he has to tell them how much he likes the outfit they're wearing or the way they did their hair.

When Lady and Trish tease him for being so infatuated he'll deny it vehemently.

"We're just friends, I talk to everyone like that!" "Uh huh, you totally tell everyone they look sexy eating pizza Dante."

Has no idea how down bad he is until one night he's cranking one out and their image pops into his head.

One thing's for sure, the post nut clarity is a bitch slap of truth this time.

Vergil

Unlike Dante, Vergil is a much harder nut to crack (hah)

He catches himself falling hard and fast before he can show it externally

He'll immediately emotionally withdraw himself once he realizes how he feels. Of course he cares about them, that's why he has to keep them away.

Although he emotionally distanced himself, he can't physically stay away from them.

This only worsens his internal struggle, and soon enough he'll start making excuses in his head to justify staying around them.

"If I don't flirt with them then there's no harm done, talking about books over tea never hurt anyone" "I don't care about them anymore, they'll only get hurt, but it'll hurt them too if I skip lunch with them tomorrow."

This continues until he reaches his final conclusion, "I can be strong enough to protect them this time."

From that point on he'll take the secret admirer route, leaving small gifts and notes, mostly poems, for them to find.

Vergil will take note of things they tell him to add in later. They mention their favorite candy? You bet they're gonna find a small package with a hand written note later that night.

Nero

It's really not too hard to tell when Nero has a crush.

While he's considered the most level headed of the three, he's also the one who can't seem to find his footing when he's down bad.

He'll become a blushy mess whenever they're around. (Nico likes to tease him about how his ears turn red)

He's so desperate to win them over he'll take advice from anyone, even Dante (big mistake).

Bad pickup line after bad pickup line, he tries his best.

He'll try to get as close to them as possible, mentally noting down every detail about them and their life.

He'll try to go the same route as Vergil but will soon get impatient (both with coming up with good notes and how long it's taking)

After a while he finds it easiest to just be honest about how he feels.

[hed-romancer]

-Everyday-

Part 5 of my AU comic where Teru is stronger than Mob, but also works with just regular canon. Was no one going to tell me I forgot to draw ears for the first 4 parts????

Strength Swap AU Original idea

Strength Swap Comic: part 1 previous part next part

i don't support mcdonalds or subway, just tryna show teru is not eating healthy

image id below the cut!

image id:

The first panel reads, "Everyday, Hanazawa Teruki..."

The three panels below it split the paper in thirds. The left column reads "yesterday", the middle "Today", and the right "tomorrow"

Under today and yesterday are images of teru in bed at 6:00 on thursday and friday, respectively. he is not wearing a wig. under tomorrow, he lies in bed at 11:57 on saturday. in all three he is frowning. underneath all three, a text box reads "wakes up alone,"

Under yesterday is an image of some mob-o's cereal ("the easy cereal"), under today is an image of a mobdonalds takeout bag, and under tomorrow is an image of a hand reaching for a granola bar. underneath all three, a textbox reads, "eats breakfast alone,"

Under yesterday is an image of teru walking in the sun with a frown on his face, under today is a closer up image of teru walking in the sun with a frown on his face. underneath both of them, a textbox reads "and walks to school alone". Under tomorrow is an even closer up image of teru in bed at 14:22 on saturday, with a frown on his face. text below reads "or finds something else to do alone."

Under yesterday is an image of a kid saying, "you're so cool, teru!" and under today is an image of a different kid saying, "Please go out with me, Teru!" Underneath both is the text, "He has friends..." Under tomorrow, is an image of Teru standing alone, above the text "just not ones he sees outside of school."

Under yesterday is an image of a flip phone saying "Mom: We're so proud of you Teru!" and under today is two pictures hanging on the wall, one of a younger teru and his parents, and one of just his parents. below both are the words "He has parents..." Under tomorrow is an image of 5 letters, reading: "We promise!", "We'll visit!", "Next year!", "Soon!", "Soon!" Underneath is the text, "just not ones he sees ever."

Under yesterday is an image of an open freezer with a bunch of frozen food (mostly pizzas). Under today is an image of a mob-way eat-fresh bag. Under tomorrow is an image of Teru lying in bed at 18:57 on Saturday, with his stomach rumbling. Under all three is the text, "He eats dinner alone."

Under yesterday, today, and tomorrow, are three images of the same tv, all displaying the movie title "Flying Dead Pig." Underneath all three is the text, "He watches movie alone" with an "s" at the end of "movie" crossed out.

A textbox says "He's done this every day for years, but every once in a while, his life gets exciting."

The three columns are now labeled "Age 10"- above an image of Teru standing over a dead adult with a broken window in the background- "Last week"- above an image of Teru wrapping his own injured arm using a first aid kit- and "The rest of his life, probably"- above an image of Teru standing, fists raised and glowing with power as he says "Try me."

A textbox reads, "Hanazawa Teruki is safe alone, because he's the strongest. He always has been, and he always will be."

[master-of-humiliations]

My idea of a perfect date night...

Is one that starts the afternoon off with some nice, tight bondage. Tools, ropes, it doesn't really matter, as long as you end up tied tight. We end up at my place, where a pizza is ordered. While we wait, we put on some bad movie or another, one we can laugh at while my cock remains in your mouth.

Once the pizza arrives, I hand-feed you yours while we continue the movie, no need to untie you. Once we're done with pizza and you've gotten some drink, your mouth goes back around my cock, it doesn't matter if it's limp and I've already cum, you're going to do your part. All the while, nice, casual fondling is going on.

Once the movie is done, it's probably evening, too late for you to go back, so I guess you're spending the night over... still in the same bonds. Morning comes, you're untied enough to get partially ready, having to rely on me for the rest before you're finally untied fully to go about your normal day. Hope you can explain those lovely rope marks!

[blackhill2245]

"I love you, and."

Warnings | mommy issues, abandonment issues.

Note | Has anyone ever listened to please be rude by Gigi Perez? That's what I listen to whilst making this 10/10

I walk into Grey Sloan Memorial Hospital, a bundle of nerves.

I was the new resident cardiac surgeon, but I was also only 24.

I know it's very young, but I had spent my whole life studying to become the best surgeon I could be, not by my choosing, though. When I was younger, I wanted to be a firefighter. In fact, I still did, but it's too late for that now. My father is one of the most well-known plastic surgeons, and once I was born, he was determined to make me exactly like him but better, so he pushed me to my limits, and instead of having sleepovers, or going to the movies with friends, I spent my childhood at home being taught by highly respectable tutors, by 14 I graduated high-school then 18 I entered my intern years. Now, at 24, I was one of the youngest residents in the world.

After a minute, I realized I was standing in the middle of the hallways like an idiot, I quickly snap out of it and head to the nurses desk.

"Hello?" My voice was small and hesitant as I looked over the counter to see the nurse, who was busy typing away. "Um- I have a meeting with cheif bailey, I was just wondering if you could give me directions?"

I fiddle with my fingers as she looks up, eyeing me she handed me a map and went back to whatever she was doing. "Thank you," I squeak, all but running away, God she was scary.

After getting lost 3 times and realizing the map was upside down, I finally make it to her office.

¤■¤■¤■¤■¤■¤■¤■¤■¤■¤■

After a meeting that lasted two hours and a bunch of paperwork, I was finally given my badge and pager, I was also introduced to a couple of people, one of which I already hated, Owen Hunt.

He hadn't done anything bad but I just got really bad vibes from him.

Currently, I was sitting under a gurney. Why? you may ask, well, it's simple, really, it was dark, cold and cramped, a perfect spot for me to eat my lunch and I wouldn't be bothered.

Well, that's what I hoped for anyway, but it's a hospital, the most peace you will get is in the time it takes for you to get out of your car in the morning and making your way to the building.

As I was minding my own business munching on my cafeteria pizza, a head pops under the gurney, she was pretty I had to admit, but it didn't stop me from being annoyed at being interrupted.

The strange woman plopped on the floor, sitting criss cross she had to bend down further to be able to see me.

"What are you doing?" Her voice was soft, with a hint of bemusement as she scanned me from head to toe.

"I'm eating my lunch" I thought it was obvious why else would I be laying in a weird position under a gurney with pizza and choclate milk?

"Clearly," she rolled her eyes, "but why here?" She tilts her head, her blue eyes crinkled as she smiles at me.

I eye her for a moment before I let my own smile appear, there's something about this woman that makes me think we're gonna be best friends.

"It's comfy and quiet," I say, my mouth full of pizza. She grimances as she gives me a faux stern look, "chew with your mouth closed".

I laugh the pizza in my mouth, almost flying out as I rush to cover it with my hand, I quickly swallow the remainder of my food, "what's your name?" I realized I hadn't gotten it yet.

"Amelia Sheperd, head of neuro, you?" I place the empty paper plate down and take a sip of my chocolate milk before responding with my name and position, as I expected I see her suprised expression, "your a bit young, no?" I sigh I hated that question.

"I'm 24, skipped a couple of grades," her expression was one of the funiest things ever. Her eyes were wide, and she was clearly trying to hide it, and it was just too funny.

"Your practicly a fetus!" Scratch that, her response was funnier.

Although I didn't know it just yet, this interaction was one of many that led to our strong friendship.

□■□■□■□■□■□■□■□■□■□

Three weeks later, me and Amelia were practically inseparable, we were always having movie night, or helping each other with hard cases.

Currently I was slumped over in a gurney, no energy to hide beneath it.

"Whats up, buttercup!?" I groan, "shhh. " I hush amelia. She was a little too loud for me, right now.

"Whats wrong?" This time she was more quiet and a little more concerned, "I couldn't sleep last night my neighbors were fighting and chose to be as loud as possible" I sigh scrubbing my face tiredly.

Instead of responding, Amelia just grabbed my hand, dragging me somewhere, I wasn't all that botherd, this was a regular occurrence being dragged by her. I just got used to it.

"I want you to meet someone," she leads me outside to a cute little coffee cart, she shoved me over, telling me to order something so I don't fall asleep.

"As long as you're buying," I giggle, buying myself coffee. She rolls her eyes fondly, whipping out some cash to pay before dragging me away, almost making me spill my coffee.

"Hey!" I whine as I nearly burnt myself. "OH hush," she finally stops dragging me.

As I look up about to argue that I would I fact not hush, I spot a lady beside her.

I get shy, I mean wow, she's so pretty... and her hair is so red. I blush bright red hiding behind Amelia, who only chuckles.

"I'm not that scary, am I?"

I peep around tentatively, before amealia steps to the side.

I glare at her before I hear a chuckle, turning to the new lady she introduces herself "I'm addison montgomery" she holds out her hand, I introduce myself a lot less confident than her, but only smiles fondly pulling me into a hug.

I squeak, not expecting it, Amelia laughs as addison lets me go. I don't go far, sticking by her side, I blame the clingyness to her amazing smelling perfume, not the fact she made me all warm and fuzzy just from a look.

"You must be the baby resident Amelia has been telling me so much about" she has a little smirk as I glare at Amelia, yet again.

"Well, it's not my fault yous are all fossils!" Addison laughs in amusement as me and Amelia bicker between each other.

"Amelia, I love you, and you're acting like a child." her tone is full of amusement, but I was more focused on the wording.

For some reason, it stuck with me, I always hated hearing 'I love you, but' to me, it's like saying I loved you, or your annoying so I don't fully love you. I don't know how to describe it, but hearing that made me feel weird, but a good weird?

Over the next couple days, I kept hearing the fraise between amelia and addison, like when Addison stole Amelia's charts so she would take a nap she said, "I love you, and you need a nap" or when Amelia stole addisons coffee and said "I love you and drink some water, please?"

Every time i heard it, it rooted itself further into my brain, to the point of starting to say it as well. The first time I said it, I said it to amelia, and she was irritating me.

I was very overstimulated, a big rush of patients came in, and I was swamped. There were so many noises, crying, screaming, shouting, etc. I finally got a second to myself before amelia came over to talk to me. She was rambling loudly next to me when I cut In.

"Amelia, please, I love you, and I'm very overstimulated right now," and although I didn't see it, amelia had the happiest look on her face as she realized what I said.

From then on out, I said it to her, and she said it to me, all the while me and addison got closer.

Addison was like the mother I never had, she made me take naps so I wouldn't get cranky, and If I couldn't sleep she would sit in the room on her phone because she knew it helped me sleep if someone was in the room with me. She forced me to eat breakfast because she knew if I didn't, I would get snappy despite how I never ate breakfasts.

The only bad thing about me and addisons' new friendship is that I became very attached to her. If I didn't see her every 48 hours, I got all mopy and sad, but amelia found it endearing that her two best friends were getting along.

□■□■□■□■□■□■□■□■□■□

It has been a full 2 months since I started in the hospital, and honestly? I couldn't be happier, my father had stopped contacting me, which was great, because I hated him.

Me and Amelia's friendship only got stronger, and addison well let's just say I nearly called her mom on one or two occasions which was very embarrasing, thankfully I don't think she realized what was said.

Currently, I was staying with addison and Amelia as my landlord increased the rent to 7000 a month, and there's no way in hell I would be paying that.

I was grateful to have the day off. By the time i woke up, amelia and addison were long gone, and I was feeling miserable.

I felt weak like I couldn't stand up. My stomach was in knots nausea rolling around every time I tried to move, head thumping with one of the worst headaches ever.

Not to my own suprise. I stayed in that bed for hours, not getting up for anything. To be honest, I don't think I could get up even if i tried.

I didn't realize how long passed. It wasn't until I heard keys rattling in the door that I made an effort to get up

That failed. I could barely sit up, I just didn't want amelia or addison seeing me like this.

"Hon?!" I heard addison call out, normally if I was home when they got home I would be waiting at the door to give them hugs.

"Addie!?" I call, because as much as I didn't want them seeing me like this I really needed the toilet and could not stand on my own.

Amelia was the first to enter her face, immediately creasing with concern.

"Oh," she said sympathetically, and addison had to shove her out of the way to get into the room. "Oh baby," she cooed, I could probably imagine how badly I looked, I was sweaty hair sticking to my forehead, I was pale and shaky.

Addison rushed over to feel my head, "You have a fever hun" I Humm nuzzling into her heavenly cold hands, and she chuckles, telling Amelia to grab some medicine and water.

Next thing you know, I've chugged half a bottle of water and had so many pills shoveled down my throat. I'm not even sure what they are.

Addison left to grab some things from the store, so it was only me and Amelia, "Melia?" I mumbled.

"Yes?" She sat up to look at me. "I need to pee," she huffed before helping me to the bathroom, practicly carrying me. Thankfully, she turned around and once finished helping me to my bed.

"I love you, and you're really sweaty," she huffed, I giggled, "I love you too," I see her roll over in the bed to face me and I roll over to face her to.

"You know you're like my weird little niece," I laugh. "What?" She reaches her hand over to swipe my hair out of my face, "yea, I mean, you're not my child. Your addisons and addison is my sister, so..." I smile and decide to just hug her instead of answering, "then your my crazy aunt"

That night, I fell asleep cuddled up to my 'aunt'.

Over the next few days, I slowly improved. I still don't have my strength, but my apatite has come back, and the fever has gone down.

Right now, Amelia is at work, and its Addisons turn to stay with me.

"Addy?" I whine, she was sitting on the chair opposite my bed, reading with her little glasses, god she looked like a librarian.

"Yes?" She looked up, pushing her glasses up. Instead of answering verbally, I made grabby hands, "words honey, " she reminded me, I just whine "too far away." I grumble but smile as she makes her way over to me.

I cuddle my face into her lap, one of her hands holding her book as the other scratches my head, she starts to read aloud.

After a while, I start to fall asleep the sound of her soothing voice, the smell of her perfume, and the gentle scratches lulling me into a sense of calmness.

During our time together, I started seeing addison as my actual mom, I've never had one before, and my birth mom abandoned me, and well, my dad never really dated again, so addison was filling that void. She comforts me when I'm sad and holds me when I'm tired. She's seeks me out and hugs me when she's down, and I make sure she's not too stressed with work. She defends me from mean patients, and if she ever hears of someone bad mouthing me, well let's just say they never do it again.

Thinking about all this made me realize how much I appreciate her and Amelia, so I turn, now laying on my back so I can look up at her.

She stops reading, putting g her book down she carresses my face softly with a questioning look.

"I love you," I say quietly, I see her smile, eyes softening even more, "I love you too." her voice is soft as she holds me like I will break at any moment.

"No, you don't understand," I say, slightly frustrated, "I love you, I love you and Amelia, your family to me."

"Your family to me too," she says, tilting her head in a confused manner, "no, your like a mom to me," I admit, "and Amelia's the weird aunty"

I see addisons eyes tear up and internally panick thinking amelia was wrong and addison doesent think of me like that.

"OH hun," she whispers gathering me in her arms so I was cradled to my chest, "your like the daughter I always wanted" Instantly I start to cry, hearing the woman I thought of as a mom call me her daughter, just healed a part of me I didn't know I had.

Just then, amelia walks in all happy until she sees us both crying, "What happened!?" She asks, panicked, climbing onto the bed beside us, "You're the crazy aunt, " addison chuckles wetly, tears still falling as she holds me tight, amelia smiles brightly, "you both had the talk?" She whispers to addison, although I still heard, I'm assuming addison talked to amelia about all this, and amelia encouraged her to talk to me.

Amelia doesn't need the answer as I grab her and pull her into our hug, we are a family, a pretty weird and dysfunctional one, but oh well.

If you told me a couple of months ago, I would have found two people who made me feel more at home than anybody has ever done, I would laugh straight in your face... yet here we are, and I couldn't be happier.

[flaetsbnortoriginals]

I dreamt that I was watching a live action Duck Tales movie. The actors were just normal, no indication that they were ducks. It was so bad that my fiancee, who really loves bad movies (in real life) was actively trying to distract me to prevent me from watching the movie.

I don't remember almost anything about the plot, if there even was one.

The main character was Scrooge McDuck, portrayed by an actor wearing his iconic red coat, and no other part of his outift. No top hat, no cane, no weird shoes. He didn't even have sideburns. The movie portrayed him weirdly dramatically, like a misunderstood genius. I remember thinking in the dream that the cinematography was deliberately trying to call Oppenheimer to mind. (I didn't watch Oppenheimer.)

The only other characters from the show were Huey, Lewey and Dewey, who were fully grown adults. Two of them still had clothes in different shades of a single colour - red and green - but the last one was dressed entirely in black. As the movie went on they met kind of their female counterparts, who were dressed in yellow, purple, and black. They acted together for a while and then the male siblings disappeared from the plot. In the dream I saw this as social commentary.

Scrooge McDuck was being chased by a woman holding a kind of bowdlerized gun. He had managed to give her the slip once, but then in a really weird scene (in which I'm pretty sure my brain forgot it was supposed to be a movie) he enters a building through the main doors, only to reach the end of a long lobby and find out the lines are coming in from the side doors. There's no way to leave from where he is, it's a dead end. When he turns around to leave, the woman is there. I don't remember exactly what happens, but Scrooge somehow defeats her and she turns into a ghost who sings a song about the agency of female characters in media. In the dream I saw this as perfectly appropiate social commentary.

The three female siblings were searching for their mother's corpse, because of some artifact she was carrying, and finally found it. They started to celebrate, and at this point my fiancee distracts me by talking to me. When we're done talking and I turn my attention back to the movie, it is completely different. Scrooge now has a bird's head, only the head, but it's not a duck's head; it has short white feathers, tiny eyes, and a long crooked yellow beak, like a toucan's. He's talking to another person with the same sort of bird head. I don't understand what they're talking about. The cinematography is also differente, it's less dramatic and even the colours are a bit brighter.

I'm very confused, so I rewind the movie to watch the scene with the siblings celebrating again. Their celebration is weird, it feels very 'end of movie' even though I remember there being a lot more that they needed to do. The celebration also keeps focusing on the pizza brand, it reminded me of the Cerveza Cristal beer ads in Star Wars. After the scene ended, instead of moving on to the scene with the toucan-beak Scrooge I'd seen before, it moved on, in dream fashion, to a completely different scene. I was very confused by this. I woke up shortly after.

[justwordsonpages]

We were just eating food at his friend's house

It was just pizza and a movie, I sat in the recliner, he sat on the couch next to me

It's just that once he was done eating his food, he quickly set his food down and came over to sit in the recliner with me so we could cuddle for the rest of the movie

I never wanted the moment to end, him holding me

His hand on my leg, comforting me and making sure I don't go anywhere

So we basically ended up doing the same thing last weekend, but with more people at his friend's house

We all went out to get food in the pouring down rain, I was shivering because my clothes were wet

He held me so close to him and never let me go while we waited in line

He kept trying to rest his chin on my head

He stayed standing behind me with his arms around me like he was silently both protecting me and warming me up in the panda express lobby

I'd long forgotten about the food, even though I didn't feel well, he was all that mattered to me at that time

We all ate while we watched a movie, or talked, or whatever.

Except this time, he was already sitting in the recliner when I sat down, ready to share it with me

So we ate sitting in the same chair and I felt like I truly had a partner

Because when he finished his food he came and sat down in the chair with me again and pulled my leg into his lap like a man on a mission

Like I belonged there, belonged with him

He held my leg in place and made sure I wasn't going anywhere

Where would I possibly go, unless only to get closer to him?

Every so often he'd lean over to whisper something in my ear or give me a random forehead kiss to make sure I was okay, to make sure I knew he saw me

He is not afraid of showing me love in front of other people

He doesn't care who sees him or judges him for it, he wants to keep his hands on me as much as he can and I don't think I've ever loved another's touch this much

He is the king of gentle squeezes while we're holding hands, even if he's completely talking to someone else

He wants me to know that he's there and he's got me and he's thinking about me

I think his friends are jealous and I can't say I even blame them

He's been whispering in my ear more lately and I felt myself come unglued

[whatyourusherthinks]

A Quiet Place: Day One

So I wasn't really forward to this. Not because the trailers were bad, they were fine I guess. But because the original A Quiet Place is what I would call a diorama horror movie. It works exclusively in the specific scenario it sets up for itself. Once it starts expanding outward, you start to ask questions that it isn't prepared to answer. I didn't watch the second Quiet Place, by the way. I heard that it wasn't that good so I skipped it. I also keep thinking the title of this movie is A Quiet Place: Year One, so that's a good sign for how well this will stick to my memory.

What's This Movie About?

A dying poet is in New York City when the aliens from the Quiet Place invade, and she teams up with a British law student to go get a last slice of pizza.

What I Like.

At the start of the movie, there wasn't much to like, not gonna lie. The main character was very unlikable and her goal seemed completely random and stupid. But as the movie unfolds and she eventually explains herself, I actually was on board with the pizza plan. (Yeah, you thought I was joking about that. But I wasn't!) I like the law student a lot. The two best scenes in the movie are when they can just relax for a moment and connect. I also think the tension in the movie is very well done. It's not as good as the first movie, as the background music and more dialogue doesn't create a better atmosphere than the first Quiet Place, but A Quiet Place: Fortnite One does one theme that I personally find really horrifying. The idea that a human's instinct in a crisis is to make noise. When we get scared, we scream. If we're hurt, we yell for help. All of our emergency services use cars with loud sirens and to convey information to each other we talk. All of that gets you killed in A Quiet Place: First Century BCE. It's definitely the scariest idea of the setting and the movie takes full advantage of it.

What I Didn't Like.

The aliens in the movie. I don't know if they have official names for whatever they are, so I'm just going to call them the Motherfuckers. The Motherfuckers in the original A Quiet Place were terrifying. They were so fast and strong, that basically making any noise louder than shush became instant death. You basically never saw a bit of them until the end, which is when the family discovers how they can kill them. They were basically an existential threat. You couldn't run from the Motherfuckers, you could only hide by being quiet, and the happy ending of the movie is the discovery of how to fight them.

Meanwhile, A Quiet Place: One Day In Shangri-La turns the Motherfuckers into a horde of idiot grimblies that mindlessly chase anything that makes any sort of noise. My biggest problem is that you see way too much of them. And they look stupid. Their rippling faces are sort of gross, I guess, but I can't not get over their super long arms and giant hands. They look like cartoon characters, especially when they start moving in herds and climb all over the buildings to chase down helicopters. Plus, they get severely nerfed in this movie. There are several moments where characters can out-run the Motherfuckers. That would have never happened in the original movie. Yes, they use car alarms to distract some of them, but still. Plus, in the original movie everyone had to walk on sand barefooted to avoid detection, but I guess walking over shattered glass and rubble in shoes makes the same amount of noise. They also retcon the "can't swim" weakness from the second movie. It's not that the Motherfuckers can't swim, it's that they don't know how to hold their breath. That's fucking stupid.

I have a couple other complaints. The movie is pretty slow, and while I generally liked the pace, it felt a bit shaggy in places. A lot of this movie I wasn't sure if I liked or not, and while I came out mostly positive on them. The cat isn't really one of those things. It's just basically a dog in the movie, but I guess as the weakest justification to keep it alive through some really dumb moments. The cat is the catalyst for the weirdest scene in the film. The law student needs to chase it into a destroyed construction site, where there's this alien fungus that all the Motherfuckers come to eat and I don't know what this is in the movie. Maybe to explain what the Motherfuckers actually feed on since they don't eat the things they kill? But if their only food source came from the planet with them I feel like they should've all died out before the first movie.

Final Summation.

A Quiet Place: Day One is fine. I kinda liked it even. It really does come down to the characters though, speaking with my coworkers who watched the movie with me, a lot of them thought it was too slow and was putting them to sleep. But it worked for me.

[sofiiel]

Jeff & Barb's First Fight

Oh, it was terrible, it was horrible, nobody slept for days. Nobody could get Jeff out of bed, he spent the weekend in the same underwear he wore Friday morning, listening to Barb's favorite song on repeat while serving off junk food.

His dad left him dinner at his bedroom door and even ordered him pizza. Which led to "Barb likes pizza, the veggie kind with the little mushrooms." as he sulked back into his room with her average cheese pizza.

Barb, on the other hand, is on a kick about how guys are terrible. They're all bad and a waste of time. Or at least for a handful of minutes. Because now she's asking Nancy, "Should I call him? He's probably sorry, we're probably being silly. I should totally call him."

Nancy gladly passes her the phone, "No! you're supposed to stop me!"

But Nancy is done, it's been three days of anger venting turning into mushy "I wonder what he's doing now" turning into "God, I miss his smile," turning back to anger.

Jeff's Dad has called Eddie and the guys to come talk him into at least taking a shower. Eventually, Eddie bribes him with money and "I'll go with you to where Barb hangs out with Wheeler, but you aren't meeting her smelling like onions, coconut lip gloss, and stale Pringles.

"But the lip gloss smells like-"

"Barb" Eddie and the guys sigh in unison.

It works.

The moment Jeff and Barb spot each other, it's a magnetic pull. Before they know it, they're standing across from each other. Jeff's hands are shoved into his pockets as he rocks back and forth on his heels.

Barb is crushing her purse to her chest, biting her lip as she watches him.

The silence is loud.

Barb glances back at Nancy, who is trying to signal for her to talk.

Jeff has done the same to Eddie and the guys, with Gareth motioning his hands as if saying shoo as he mouths "Go on."

The regretful pair turn to each other with saddened expressions as they each speak at once, "I'm sorry"

A smile brightens across both their faces?

"Really?" barb asks.

"Yeah, I don't even remember why I was mad in the first place," Jeff speaks quickly.

"Me neither," says Barb, who glances at him hopefully, "So, Ice cream?"

Jeff holds out his arm, waiting for her to hook her arm around it, "On me, and a movie."

Barb takes hold of Jeff's arm, grinning from ear to ear, before looking back at Nancy excitedly.

Nancy released a relieved sigh, she'll get her life back for the evening.

"Never again?" Barb asked Jeff as they walked away.

He gives a deep warm chuckle, "Never, ever, again. It's bad for my health."

[lindsaywesker]

Good morning! I hope you slept well and feel rested? Currently sitting at my desk, in my study, attired only in my blue towelling robe, enjoying my first cuppa of the day.

Welcome to Too Much Information Tuesday. Though one of these facts is a fib!

Minch, Yoda’s first name is.

Bananas have more trade regulations than AK-47s.

About 20% of US children eat pizza on any given day.

In Oklahoma, it's illegal to get a bear drunk and then wrestle it.

The original Popeye got his strength from rubbing a magic hen.

Persistent hiccups can be stopped with a digital rectal massage.

The average IQ of all the serial killers who have been caught is 89.

Samuel L. Jackson was an usher at Martin Luther King Jr.’s funeral.

French employees are forbidden by law from eating lunch at their desks.

Ejaculation from a human typically happens at a speed of around 28 miles per hour.

The longer a whiskey is aged, the longer it takes for your body to get rid of the alcohol.

When the Bakerloo line was last cleaned, staff pulled out 6.5 tonnes of grime and fluff.

American judges give harsher sentences when their football team unexpectedly loses.

In Star Trek, when Mr. Spock says something is “impossible”, it happens 83% of the time.

People suffering from superior canal dehiscence syndrome can hear their own eyeballs moving.

If you make it to the airport without dying, you've already passed the deadliest part of plane travel.

In 2016, the head of MI6 said he wouldn’t hire James Bond because he does not act ethically enough.

The US National Security Agency has asked employees to spy on people with ‘dignity and respect’.

‘Russians in the gazebo’ (‘russere i lysthuset’) is an old-fashioned Danish euphemism for menstruation.

If you wanted to write a letter out of blood you would have to write it in under a minute before the blood thickens too quickly.

Having sex uses on average 2.8 times as much energy as sitting on the sofa, but playing the trombone uses 3.5 times as much.

If you get a blood transfusion but are given the wrong type of blood (A, B, O, AB) one of the symptoms is "a sense of impending doom".

Until the 1840s, there was no maximum size for a rugby team; matches were played with up to 300 players on the pitch at once.

In relationships, the ‘magic ratio’ is 5:1. Having five or more positive interactions for every negative interaction is seen as key to a stable marriage.

There are about 40 supervolcanoes around the world capable of claiming up to a billion lives, and we're about 24,000 years overdue for an eruption!

A flapjack bakery in Lancashire plan to launch a new product in time for Christmas. After extensive research, they’ve come up with a product name: Flaps.

In movies, where they use real life dog actors, the people who edit the film sometimes have to add CGI tails because the dogs can’t stop wagging as they are so happy.

Abraham Lincoln's son (Robert Todd Lincoln) was present at three different presidential assassinations. After McKinley, he decided not to accept any more invitations.

Dragonflies can inhale water through a long tube at the tip of their anus and save it. Later, if they need to, they can shoot the water out of their anus to make them fly faster.

Pythagoras drowned a student to death because the student proved the existence of irrational numbers which contradicted Pythagoras and his cults' (the brotherhood) beliefs.

In 1997, researchers discovered a giant pill millipede. It was given the Latin name ‘Zoosphaerium darthvaderi’ thanks to the shape of its anal shield which resembles Darth Vader’s helmet.

The mayor of San Pedro Huamelula, Mexico is expected to marry an alligator. The tradition dates back to pre-Hispanic times but has been updated. The alligator wears a white wedding dress and the groom kisses the bride.

An early use of ‘asshole’ is found in a 1933 U.S. story about a family called ‘The Eastons’. “When God got the job done, there was a big pile of assholes left over. It looks to me like The Almighty just throwed all them assholes together and made the Easton family.”

Pepsi once had the 6th largest military in the world after the price of Russian Vodka couldn't cover a deal for Pepsi products. They traded 17 submarines, a frigate, a cruiser and a destroyer. The president of Pepsi Co. told National Security, "We are disarming the USSR faster than you are!"

Okay, that’s enough information for one day. Have a tremendous and tumultuous Tuesday! I love you all.

[elvenbeard]

Get to know me

I've been tagged in three separate memes with that title by @timaeusterrored and @katsigian, thanks a lot for thinking of me! :D For brevity's and simplicity's sake I'm just gonna throw all of them together in one post ~ Won't be tagging anyone in particular, but if you read this and feel inclined to share some stuff about yourself, pick and choose from the questions listed here and feel free to tag me in your posts! :D

Favorite color: Purple, Turquoise, and Black

Relationship: single

Currently reading: when I'm not re-reading my own stuff for editing purposes, I currently just really enjoy reading everyone's Cyberpunk drabbles and OC lore posts because I live for that stuff! for having been a very bookish kid I don't really read much anymore admittedly D:

Last song Played: "A Dialogue In B Flat Minor" by In Flames (it's on my V playlist and a very Vince and Johnny song to me XD)

Song Stuck in my Head: "Gloves" by Saint Punk (I'm obsessed with it because it fits Vince so much and I'm working on something inspired by it)

Last Movie: oooof... I think it was "The Shawshank Redemption", I was recently in the mood of rewatching some 90s classics while drawing!

Last series: If youtube series count, I'm currently rewatching Buzzfeed Unsolved: True Crime for the 11th or so time XD I've loved true crime stuff for as long as I can remember and BFU is also just really nice as background noise for when I'm working on something for a few hours at a time. Looking forward to diving into Mystery Files xD (the last "actual" series I watched before that was "Better Call Saul", rewatched it from start to finish in English for the first time xD)

Sweet, spicy, or savory: ooohhh hmmm.... dammit, I guess I'm too much of a sweet-tooth to not pick sweet xD

Favourite Food: Pizza with lots of different cheeses

Craving: to quit my dayjob, because objectively, it would just be really fucking funny to do. We're chronically understaffed and simultaneously also being forbidden overtime to catch up on the backlog, so it's just extremely exhausting at the moment.

Tea or coffee: Coffee, but tea is nice too :3

Dream Trip: everywhere... but my top 3 are Japan, Iceland, and Canada. I'd love to go to Japan during cherry blossom season, spend one week in all the big cities and another more on the countryside, going hiking, looking at temples, forests, and spending a day or two at a ryokan with onsen. Iceland I'd also like to see as much of as possible, I'd actually love to do a guided tour on horseback across the country xD And honestly, same for Canada (without the horses though), also a trip across the country visiting all kinds of sights and cities along the way would be awesome.

Last Thing I Googled: 2023 Conventions Germany

Currently working on: the final stages of my new Kerry x V drawing, editing some VP shoots, writing Vince's background lore fic (6 chapters done, about 6 more to go!), started writing a post-canon fic (but only have a few paragraphs), and my ongoing Cyberpunk 2077 Let's Play videos XD cause I always wanted to make a full Let's Play like that and given my current obsession it works. Looming on the horizon are also some short comics and ideas for mods and even more VP!

Are you named after Anyone?

After an OC of mine, if we go with Elven as the name I'm predominantly using atm XD Long story short, but "Elvenbeard" was an elf OC I once cosplayed as and who got his name from a friend of mine during a very long and funny train ride to the convention we were headed to. Good times XD

2. When was the last time you cried?

A couple of days ago. I think it was a mix of stress and having too many feels about Kerry xD

3. Do you have kids?

Nope, and don't want any. Unless pets count.

4. Do you use Sarcasm a lot?

I would never do such a thing.

5. What Sports do you play/ have you played?

None xD I was the short fat kid that got relentlessly bullied by my PE teacher for years which completed ruined any interest in sports I might have ever developed.

6. What's the first thing you notice about other people?

Honestly... I think I've gotten quite good at picking up people's vibes first. Picked up a very bad "stay-far-away-from-them" vibe from someone a couple of days ago, and when I met them again a little while later one of the first things out of their mouth is transphobic bullshit. I (sadly) felt rather validated with my first impression.

7. Eye Colour?

Hazel.

8. Scary Movies or Happy Endings?

Both can be good! I don't like overly gory movies or stuff that relies heavily on jump scares, but a scary film with a good story and some unexpected twists I really like (some of my faves being "Hush" and "The Conjuring"). I'm also a sucker for Happy Endings though. Best thing overall? Angst with a Happy Ending.

9. Any Special Talents?

Does hyperfocus count as a special talent these days? XD

10. Where were you born?

Somewhere in rural Germany.

11. What are your hobbies?

Yes... Drawing, writing, sewing, crafting, cosplay, gaming... and the newest addition: virtual photography!

12. Do you have any pets?

Yess, a cat!

13. How tall are you?

160cm/ 5'2 - smol and full of rage

14. Fave Subject in School?

Art, History, and English as a secondary language

15. Dream Job?

Creating things that make people happy and being able to live off of it ooooor anything that allows me to finance that kinda "maker of all kinds of things" lifestyle I'm dreaming of. Ideally, if I have to keep a dayjob, I'd like one that only takes place in the timespan of Monday to Thursday, or Tuesday to Friday, and doesn't start at 5.30 in the morning, but at 9 or 10. Or just generally the option of home office would be nice. I don't wanna be rich, but I'd like to have financial security for myself and my cat, enough time to do my silly little arts and crafts, and travel somewhere cool once a year or so.

[5sosfanfictioncatalogue]

Halloween Fluff Masterlist

Attraction Confirmed (ao3) - ConfusedPython michael/luke T, 6k

Summary: Drinking together on Halloween. There's no way in hell that can go wrong, except that it can. And when it does secrets aren't always well hidden. But love always shines through.

Better Than Halloweentown (ao3) - orphan_account michael/luke G, 1k

Summary: Michael gets sad at Halloween even though it's his favorite holiday, because he's too old to trick-or-treat but he doesn't want to be a grown up and go to parties. Then Luke knocks on his door to deliver his pizza and all of his plans to stay in for the night are foiled.

Fake Blood And Black Lipstick (ao3) - merlypops michael/calum E, 6k

Summary: ‘Michael was panting, his cheeks flaming as red as the flyaway hair sticking to his forehead. He seemed to be attempting to sweat all of his face paint off which was gross as fuck but Calum looked gorgeous and there was black lipstick smeared everywhere and Michael had never had hot zombie-actor-sex in the backseat of his car before but he was so down, he swore.’

Michael thinks Calum makes a cute zombie and Calum just wants to kiss Michael’s neck (probably).

Family Matters (ao3) - FayeHunter luke/ashton T, 2k

Summary: It's Halloween in the Hemmings-Irwin house

for your health (ao3) - drown (orphan_account) luke/ashton, michael/calum T, 3k

Summary: “You’re supposed to love me,” Luke stresses, even though at this point he’s just doing this to be a little shit—he really does love spending this kind of time with Ashton, even if he feels like his balls have shriveled up in the process.

“I love you very much but it’s Halloween.”

(luke and ashton have a movie marathon)

Halloween Movie Night (ao3) - Pagesandparagraphs michael/luke, calum/ashton T, 1k

Summary: What better way to spend Halloween than staying in watching movies and eating candy?

haunted (ao3) - no_clue_who luke/ashton, michael/crystal E, 1k

Summary: Luke checked his makeup over once more, they didn’t have long enough hair to nail the look but he hoped the bow and the wig would work enough for tonight. He fixed the straps of the dress, smoothing it down a bit and turning to look themselves over once more. He checked his hands once more, making sure there was no blood on them, they didn’t want to look messy.

He tucked one more piece of hair behind their ear and then left the bedroom, Petunia following closely behind him. They walked downstairs and saw Ashton, fixing his apron as Penny ran around his legs.

or how not to do a couples costume

haunting me forever from the start (ao3) - yellingatbabylon luke/calum, background michael/ashton T, 3k

Summary: Calum is moments away from giving a snarky response when he catches a glimpse of the people in line behind them as he turns in Michael’s direction.

And of course the most beautiful boy he has ever laid his eyes on is just steps behind him and also about to witness Calum shriek like a baby at the sight of a clown or something.

Hole In The Ground (ao3) - merlypops luke/ashton T, 3k

Summary: 'Ashton wondered how it was possible for someone to be so gorgeous that they completely scrambled his brain because that was what Luke had done to him. He’d turned Ashton into Lauren when she was watching Big Time Rush or something, and it just wasn’t on. There was no dignity in this.’

Ashton attends a truly terrible Halloween party and Luke tries to drown him in a punch bowl. Kind of.

I Don't Even Like You (ao3) - scruffylou michael/luke N/R, 5k

Summary: Basically, Michael and Luke are both at the same Halloween party, but Michael doesn't know it.

i thought you weren't scared? (ao3) - americanarry calum/ashton, michael/luke T, 1k

Summary: "we're already here, no going back now." or, 5sos go to cobb estate. luke's scared of the dark, michael is a cuddly asshole, ashton just wants to protect everyone, ghosts hate calum.

not like the others (ao3) - galacticsugar luke/calum T, 6k

Summary: “Luke?” Something about saying it feels nice, the press of Calum’s tongue against his teeth on the L, the way his lips purse slightly around the U, the satisfying sharpness of the K at the end. Refreshing.

Michael nods, lifting onto his toes to scan the crowd, then pointing towards the fence between Calum’s and Jack’s yards. “Over there. Can’t miss him. Huge, looks like Jack.”

Calum scans the cluster of people by the fence until he zeros in on the one unfamiliar face. He makes a strangled noise and murmurs “holy fuck” under his breath.

The Monster Mash, It Was a Graveyard Smash (ao3) - FayeHunter luke/ashton T, 8k

Summary: Luke keeps running into the same guy while he’s out shopping for Halloween. The guy is very involved in Luke’s plans.

we can be pirates (ao3) - bellawritess luke/calum T, 3k

Summary: “Rosie threatened to cut off my head if I didn’t tell her where I hid the treasure,” Luke tells Calum solemnly.

Rosie chimes in, “Hey! It wasn’t me, it was Captain Blackbeard. She’s a vicious pirate.” She shrugs innocently. “I don’t wanna kill Uncle Luke. I’m just a kid.”

“And life is a nightmare?” Calum says under his breath, beating Luke to the punch by half a second.

you say you didn't know, i wonder why you didn't ask? (ao3) - hideforalifetime michael/luke T, 14k

Summary: Luke and Michael have been best friends since elementary school, moving out of the country all alone, but together for college, getting through all the highs and lows of adulting together. There’s never been a person who knows them that doesn’t refer to them as “Luke and Michael”. Always paired, and if one’s without the other, questions are immediately asked. Hell, some people automatically assume they’re dating, and he hurriedly corrects them. But deep down, Luke doesn’t want to. He doesn’t know when his brain made the transition of looking at Michael as a friend to someone he’d want as more than a friend, but it’s true. Sometimes, when he stares at Michael’s choppy, often dishevelled blue hair, he feels like-

[darkmoonkestrel]

daily kestrel 16:

the full moon was yesterday. i can tell because the kids at work are especially wild after a full moon. it doesn't help that I was in the two year old room today since the lead teacher wasn't there (what is it with lead teachers and not being there this week?)

today involved an overflowing toilet and a child who got kicked in the face swiftly returning the favor by giving his friend a solid punch to the face in retaliation, and that's only a few of the tidbits from today. the rest I don't need to remember honestly. at least I did get free pizza at lunch for letting a state farm insurance guy talk at me for a few minutes, and got some schoolwork done over lunch and child nap time

they let me get off early and for once I wasn't gonna question it or linger, as soon as those 4pm pull up changes were done i was outta there. i hit Sam's after work and got a pizza and other supplies, including giving a new brand of sparkling water a try, although I haven't actually tried it yet (Peyton has, and he likes it, so that's a good sign)

i was grumpy when i got home and I went to take a shower and then promptly had a good cry when Peyton and Paige said "hey we know you're grumpy we can't really help if you're not gonna talk to us" but we worked that out and went back to working on the magic puzzle & watching bob borger.

we finished the puzzle around 8:30ish, surprise and all, so after we spent some time finding easter eggs, taking pictures, and packing the puzzle back up, Peyton & Paige started a horror movie for their watchlist challenge thing. i came into the office and played some more slime rancher 2, which I am still thoroughly enjoying. we're definitely gonna get another magic puzzle (or three, they have bundles) bc that one was just so good and fun, even though they know the nature of the twist in the puzzle now. i'm typing this in the office bc it's easier to do here than on my phone, but it's just about time for bed bc i have another going into work 30 minutes early day tomorrow

[hankkd7]

[2021] Bentley's journal

~~ JAN 6, 2021. ~~

It has been more than 24 hours since the death of my mother...Tess told me that I should write down some of my thoughts in a text file of some kind, just for myself... I don't know how this will help me, considering I have never done this kind of thing before, but I trust Tess because she herself has tried it before.

More about her death...I woke up at 3:47 AM to a loud noise. Thinking nothing of it, I went back to sleep. Turns out that was the gun going off. Makes my stomach turn knowing I left her decomposing for some 8 hours...

I wasn't able to sleep that night, even with Tess just downstairs ready to comfort me whenever... I faintly remember a night terror I had...all I can remember of it is that my head hurt like hell afterwards. Tess told me I was shouting at something...so it must've felt all that real to me.

Yet, I don't know why I can't remember it... Call me crazy, but I only heard my mother whisper my name in the dead of night...I guess this is the start of the grieving process.

~~ JAN 11, 2021. ~~

We're having the funeral in Astoria, where she grew up. It's hard to guess why she'd move down to California instead of Astoria. I'm pretty sure she told me once that this house was once my paternal grandparents' house before they retired.

The hardest thing about yesterday was talking about the plans for the funeral with my uncle. It's the first time I've heard him cry...he just lost his sister just like that. I knew that they were very close.

Reading him the part in the note my mother wrote that was addressed to him was difficult too... it was just too fucking difficult to not break down into tears...My little cousins don't even know yet...

I still haven't slept yet...I feel so tired and weak...and I don't feel like eating at all... That mental image of that room is constantly flashing in my mind whenever it pleases itself to.

Is it all my fault...? Why didn't I see the warning signs...?

~~ JAN 12, 2021. ~~

I've been felling worthless with every hour after my last entry...just absolutely pathetic... I still...can't...fucking...sleep or make myself eat.

Or at least I couldn't...

Tess came over to check in on me and help me pack up for the trip up. I'll never forget the look on her face when she saw me... It look like she was worried, horrified...but also glad to see that I was okay...?

She said I looked so exhausted and hungry...she practically had to watch me eat a thing of yogurt before tucking me into bed while she gathered my things...Never have I felt so relaxed around her until now...

I ended up waking up from a 12 hour long rest to her watching a movie quietly. She also ended up surprising me with the news that she's coming up to Astoria with me for the funeral, and will be giving me a ride to and from. I remember feeling relieved that I wouldn't have to endure that nearly 5 hour long drive by myself.

Tess ordered us a pizza and we spent the rest of our evening talking...she managed to get me to laugh for the first time in three days...Over all; a really nice time bonding with each other... Since we haven't hung out in-person that much after the mass hysteria of the COVID pandemic...seeing each other and talking like nothing happened feels so comforting for me...

Not to mention she kissed my cheek while I was walking her out to her car. She had a blush unlike any other she's had.

The car ride tomorrow might be a little awkward for a tiny bit. But we both know that we're just a little more affectionate for each other than most friendships of the opposite sex...

~~ JAN 13, 2021. ~~

We've gotten a hotel room for ourselves after visiting with my family for a bit. I've been starting to feel like little things that wouldn't really bother me are now starting to piss me off.

I don't know if this is just a part of the grieving process, but I don't feel right. Like, I'm a new person after the event...

~~ JAN 23, 2021. ~~

I completely forgot about this log. I've just been so occupied...doing nothing... I emailed my professor, explaining my situation and that I would need some time off. And then after my trip...isolation. From everyone but Tess.

She's been checking in on me at least once every other day. Sometimes bringing me sandwiches from work for some decent food. I lie to her about my mental health though...I don't know why...I just feel like I'm gonna waste her time venting about everything that's bothering me.

I'm doing fucking terribly in actuality.

Is it normal to want to hurt yourself after this...?

~~ FEB 1, 2021. ~~

Yesterday, I cut myself for the first time. It felt scary...like I would die on accident... but then the urges became stronger each time I did it...

I hope I'm not obsessed with doing it...?

I've been wearing longer sleeves to hide this from Tess, I don't want her to worry about me. Neither should anyone else. Ever.

~~ FEB 16, 2021 ~~

Tess came over on Valentines day to give me some groceries she got for me. She gave me some candy, shyly of course. I keep forgetting how important she is to me. I'd literally die for her.

I think she'd break off our friendship if she ever found out what I'm doing behind closed doors...

~~ FEB 23, 2021 ~~

I think I'm going to far...I literally had to fucking do it while she was over, huh? Good thing I did it in the privacy of my own bathroom.

My cover almost got blown when she found some blood droplets on the floor. I ended up coming up with a "shaving accident".

I need to be more careful or else our friendship will be ruined.

~~ MAR 8, 2021 ~~

Yesterday was my 19th birthday, Tess took me to a nice dinner a couple miles out of town, it felt cozy in there with all this snow pounding down where we both live.

She tried her best to make it a really good birthday, and it payed off.

I don't think I cut myself at all that day...which is a first...

~~ MAR 20, 2021 ~~

I feel very bad for Tess...she's wasting her hard earned money on someone as hopeless as myself. Of course...she's stable enough to get me things but...why me of all people...?

~~ APR 9, 2021 ~~

This whole fucking thing was my fault. I can sense it. I didn't notice jack shit. I didn't realize she was suffering this badly.

I want to join her, but what will Tess think...she'll have no one to turn to when she needs someone.

~~ APR 18, 2021 ~~

I'm going to fucking snap. Just take my soul away, whatever is in control of my miserable life.

I've got no choice, if you're reading this, Tess, then I'm long gone from this hell we call life.

I'll stage it as an accident if I fucking have too.

~~ APR 22, 2021 ~~

I just came back from the hospital 7 hours ago. I was admitted on the 19th. I don't want to get into details. I'm not sure if I even can. I don't really remember what happened, but from what I've heard, I intentionally cut too deep.

Tess got worried when I didn't show up to work, so she rushed over to my place. There I was, bleeding on my bed, about to die. She held and comforted me until help arrived.

Jesus...what the fuck was I thinking? If I did end up pulling it off, she would've seen me; dead. Just like how I found my mother. Dead in her bed, the gun still in her hand.

And then what? Would she get depressed too? Would she spiral out just like how I did? I'm so fucking stupid.

Tess now knows that I had a self-harming issue. I now realize that I somehow convinced myself that she'd hate me for doing that. But she doesn't. Of course she doesn't.

She made me promise to not do it ever again, or at least not as often as I used to. The urge is still there, begging for release. Every time I look at that knife though...I can't help but think: "This thing nearly killed me."

It hurts so much, but I have to stay strong for Tess.

I'm ending these fucking journals, it makes me sick reading past entries.