#then i had an appointment to go to lmao

[princescar]

when i was searching the twitter mines for matsuda birthday (unsuccessfully) i came across this from kodaka and i am Ignoring the first half but. matsuda promising to take ryoko out for dinner... and the tweet was written on dec 24th............. him taking care to remember her birthday and treat her to dinner Real and (semi) Canon

i love this line very specifically because it is Super sneaky with a double meaning that's only revealed until after reading the whole story.. the scene establishes matsuda saying hes only interested in ryoko because of her talent and memory loss, which then this line is assumed to be saying matsuda only cares about neuroscience and such, however in this sentence "research subject" could also imply "ryoko", as the previous conversation has ryoko as the subject - so i think the second meaning of this could be read as matsuda doesn't care for anything but his research subject, ryoko

LAST RAMBLE I PROMISE i was reading about neuroticism and i couldnt help but think about how these are directly contrasted with ryokos personality..

matsuda, always so pessimistic and worrying, and ryoko, cheerful and unbothered.. they balance each other out <3_<3 i also cant help but then think back to junko and i wonder if thats maybe even been a draw between them before things got really bad. a lot of their negative attributes would be negated by the other and they could rely on their opposites to bring them comfort waaaah. but also junko even when bad probably adored his neuroticism. it being listed as a negative by his classmates however she probably would have adored his constant moping and affinity for despair .. just like her

Lmao, him having to drag her around for her own birthday. I do have a big headcanon that he was the only kid who came to her birthday party (due to it being Christmas eve and all) and thats what won her heart. Considering how much she hates her birthday and the interview with Kodaka about the idea of class 78 throwing her a surprise birthday party and thats why she grew so attracted, it does fit really well. (also gives that surprise bday party more angst considering it would have to happen AFTER matsuda dies)

also feel like that double meaning really pairs up nicely with this. him not being able to fully refute her claim that he only cares about his research, both because its true (as she is his research) and false (because he also has to take care of the mess Junko left behind, but he cant say that)

(also this scene destroys me in so many ways, from being confused at how matsuda is so good at tying knots to fucking SOBBING over "Let me forget about you!" Then him actually fucking apologizing even after he knows she forgot???? Best chapter tied with vol.2 chp.6)

The fact that shes so unbothered by the world and that Matsuda feels the need to worry on her behalf, and thus needs to protect her. Also "I wouldn’t be able to live with myself if I didn’t"???? (calm down Romeo) Junko says that even when they were kids he always stood up for her, I really believe that this is the only way he would let himself express his love for her.

[im-fucking-baalin]

woagh look at that

+ the base sketch!

[golyadkin]

You ever notice a running theme in your life?

[geryone]

Signed the lease & paid my rent/deposit for October!! It’s finally starting to hit me that I need to pack everything and get ready to move

[bonefall]

Willowpelt sounds SO autistic, it not being funny wraps around into being funny again.

My secret is being so autistic and so surrounded by so many other autistic people that I forget what tismless people even do. Everyone in BB ends up getting a touch of ADHDautism. As a treat.

But yeah when I was jotting it down I realized it too. Like wow, I really hit this one with the autism beam. Me and you, Willy, we will both have adamantine opinions. I cannot condone your hatred of apples but you do have a good point about oak trees.

[strawberrryangel]

today was a good day! *collapses into bed and sobs uncontrollably*

[pochapal]

(time sensitive) on a scale from 1 to 10 how yelled at will you get if you were apparently meant to call the hospital to confirm an appointment that's due to take place tomorrow and also you were given the letter telling you to do this two weeks ago and you failed to realize this was allegedly what you had to do

[altruistic-meme]

back on my bullshit: looking through and making edits to my doc full of Issues I Have That Haven't Ever Been Looked Into for the doctor. which may prove to be futile but i will not think to bring any of this up + will absolutely try and downplay it if i do not do this.

i still keep joking that i will hand them the papers and go "pick one and we can start there" as well as threatening to walk out if they so much as breathe the word "asthma" to me. hopefully i can actually do these things at the appointment.

and i know. i know that doctors hate it when you present possible diagnoses and that you should let them do it themselves but like. you don't understand. i have had 22 years of not having anything done when i had a health concern, to the point where i stopped even realizing that things were concerning until someone else pointed out to me that it may be a problem.

so im coming armed and prepared and if the doctor refuses to work with me like im an actual person, then i will leave and i will ask for a different doctor. rinse and repeat until i find someone who will actually help me.

[satans-knitwear]

🫥

[wandersee]

not my rheumatologist cancelling on me AGAIN 😭 i got absolutely no sleep (like 2-3 hours) and woke up early for NOTHING bro 😭😭😭 and this is after having just finished super weekend at night job aka the very PEAK of peak (Christmas) season, which also means being in the middle of working 11 days straight (minus Christmas Day which we have off lol), with this last HUGELY busy weekend since it's one of The Big package shipping companies . Not necessarily complaining about THAT specifically given that I have no day job rn and the extra income from night job is the only thing that's gonna save me and let me have rent for next month fdhgdh but STILL lol, I NEED the rest man OTL

AT LEAST she opened up appts this Thurs for reschedules, instead of having to wait weeks this time, which I insanely appreciate. My initial qualm is not even necessarily being the cancelling itself, just that this is the second specialist to very recently reschedule on me 2 times back to back, and if you deal with medical specialists, you know the challenge of getting in tdghdrhdh

[tamagotchikgs]

i can't even b joyful for a new year because i immediately have 2 appointments o(-< im just Scared

[natandacat]

I have to accept that its been more than a week and I cannot count on homecare to help me out. I need to find a way out of this situation alone. Sigh. I just wanna be able to go out again. I hate being trapped in my home. Why did I have to live in a flat with stairs.

[dreamieparadise]

My eyes are so tired? Feels itchy and dry too...actually assumed my eyes must be pink, but they're not. Am I coming down with something while still dealing with something...?!

[keeps-ache]

gonna keep it shmoovin man

[a-ikuoliver]

[kitkat-of-doom]

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