#then again I am NEVER on desktop so that might be why

[nerdnag]

Holy WHAT

Out of curiosity I browsed the tag for my old tumblr, and when I hovered over my old (long since deleted) url, it gave me a freaking preview of the blog??? though the blog itself does not actually exist?????

[puppys-rhythm-heaven]

this one. this is me about all my hyperfixations. which are all funni video games. okay pokemon isn't as funni but still.

i like how fucking rabid i get over funni video games. and also how basically all of my hyperfixations are rpgs. which makes my rhythm heaven hyperfixation make even less sense tbh-

[whoisneo404]

u should write abt nick x his bestfriend!

maybe something abt how they r bestfriends and they have been for a long time and nick is starting to have feelings for him but doesn’t wanna ruin their friendship

good little angsty story with a good ending

Ik you will cook king🤗

Kiss the birthday boy.

Summary: You like Nick and he MIGHT like you too. we dont know. and its his birthday soon.

TW: reader is refered as ‘girl’ but not as in reader is a girl, as in ‘giiirl’.

“Which one do you think he will like the most?” Jake looks at me while showing me two jackets.

“Girl… none, buy that one over there, the dark brown one. He will like that.” I say pointing out a jacket hanging behind him.

“Girl, you do know him so well, that’s why I brought you here… and because you and Johnny are good friends, but anyways. Ill buy this, thanks.” He leaves the two jackets he had on hand and grabs the dark brown I pointed out and walked to the cashier. I turn around and start searching for Johnny outside of the store. “Johnny.” I say when I see him.

“Hi.” He says waving awkwardly at me.

“Ugh, I wanna go home.”

“Me too.” he hands me a coffee. “Bought this for you.”

“Thank you.” He nods.

“How are you and your… Nick situation.” I almost choked on my coffee when he said that.

“Don’t call it that.” I say wiping the coffee from my lips.

“What should I call it then? The ‘oh no I like my best friend and I think he also likes me but I’m not sure and I don’t want to ruin our long friendship’ situation?”

“Dear god Johnny, that doesn’t help.” I laugh a bit and he does too.

“Sorry… but how are you with that?”

“It doesn’t help that it’s his birthday soon?”

“Why?”

“I never buy him anything, I never have. I always gift him handmade things, he loves that kind of thing. But every time I sit down to write him a letter, I end up confessing my feelings, I can’t write something normal.”

“Rough.”

“Don’t even tell me.”

“You should talk to Jake.”

“He will tell me to just confess, it isn’t that easy.”

“What are you guys talking about?” Jake gets out of the store and walks to us.

“Coffee.” “Movies.” Johnny and I say at the same time, the three of us exchange looks.

“Movies.” “Coffee.” We say again but the other way around.

“Okay babygirls. Whatever, I won’t ask if you guys have your little secret secrets.” Jake laughs and starts walking to his car.

Once Jake drops me off in my house Johnny gives me a thumbs up and I weakly give it back to him.

---

“Still nothing?” Madi is ‘sitting’ on my desktop, my phone is propped up against my wall and she is wrapping up the gifts for Nick on the floor of her room.

“I can’t do it. I just can’t. It ends up being awkward or I end up saying how much I like him and that I wish he liked me back.” I cover my face with both of my hands and let out a groan. “Maybe I should just tell him I’m sick and I can’t go to the party.”

“He will ditch all of us to take care of you.” Madi said smiling.

“No, he wouldn-… yes he would, he is so kind and lovely to everyone.” I look at Madi and she gives me an empathetic smile which transforms into a smirk.

“Guess who’s calling me.” she says in a singing tone.

“God no, tell him to go away.”

“Already added him to the call.”

“Madi! I need to fix my hair.”

“Too late.”

“Madi!”

“Hiiii!” Nick pops up on the screen, he is smiling and standing in the middle of the room. “What are you guys chatting about? Just so you know, I am deeply offended that you didn’t invite me.” He says while fake crying. I just stare at him, trying to not bury myself into de ground.

“I was talking to this guy about what I’m gonna wear to your party. But it’s a surprise so you can’t see.” Madi says.

“Oh, I like surprises. I’m sure the both of you will look amazing.” He says while walking around his room, cleaning it up a bit. “You guys are staying to sleep, right?” I quickly look at Madi and she mumbles something that I did not understand.

“I am…” I say quickly.

“Cool.” Nick says and then he starts rambling about how exited he is to see his friends and all the things we will do at the sleepover after the party. Eventually he finished cleaning up and grabbed his phone to lay on his bed ‘with us’. We talked about our days, I told them I went out with Jake and Johnny but didn’t say why. After two hours Madi go ‘sleepy’, that’s what she told Nick because when she left the call, she texted me telling me to enjoy my alone time with Nick.

“So, Johnny, huh?”

“What does that mean?” I laugh a bit.

“You and him are close. Well, closer than before.”

“I guess.” I say, I look at my ceiling. My phone laying beside my face.

“Isn’t he like… 5 years older than us?” I quickly sit up and grab my phone, putting it in front of my face.

“What do you mean by that?”

“Like… isn’t he a bit older for you?”

“Nick… what are you saying?”

“Do you like him?” he says quickly.

“What? No. Why would you even think that?”

“I-… I don’t know. I just… fuck- it’s nothing, I just thought… I didn’t but I thought maybe you liked him and I don’t know. Look, it’s late, I’m tired. I’ll text you tomorrow.” And then he hangs up on me. nothing else. Nothing. Silence fills my room and I am confused. Why would he say that?

---

“I’m serious, he was jealous.”

“Madi stop.” The light sound of music fills Madis room as she gets ready to go to Nicks party. It has been two days since that call and I did not have the courage to text Nick, neither did he.

“I’m just saying. I have known Nick for only a few years more than you but I can talk, I know him.” She says applying on her mascara.

“I don’t know…” I lay on her bed, my legs dangling off the edge. “I just don’t know. I want to cry so bad…”

“Hey, hey.” Madi quickly drops her mascara and runs to me, she sits down beside me and I sit up, my elbows on my knees and my head between my hands. “It’s okay…” She comforts me, her arms around me. “You don’t have to go…”

“I will. He is my friend. They are my friends. I- I told Matt I was going to be there.” I mumble. “Also, I have to give them their gifts…”

Madi sighs. “If you need anything just find me. Okay?” I nod and she kisses my cheek gently. “Want me to do your make up?” I chuckle a bit.

“What for?”

“To cheer you up of course.”

“I think that will cheer you up more but, why not?”

---

“Wooow. Who did your make up?” Jake says as we enter the house.

“Oh, Madi.”

“Well, she did a great job.” Johnny adds.

“It’s only mascara, blush and… lip gloss? Lip balm? I don’t know, she put a few things there.” I laugh a bit.

“Have you seen the birthday boys?” I ask.

“Over there.” Jake points to the kitchen and I nod to them. I walk over there and let out a short sigh to brace myself.

“HAPPY BIRTHDAY!” I scream opening my arms and hugging the three of them at the same time. I feel someone laughing, awkward hands patting my back and I hear a muffled ‘thanks’. “How are my birthday boys?” I ask when I let them go.

“I’m glad you came.” Matt says.

“I’m good! we rented a jumping castle.” Chris adds with a childish smile on his face.

“No way…” I say

“Yes way.” He adds.

“Take me there.” I hand him my hand and Chris drags me. “Happy birthday Nick…” I mumble as I pass beside him.

---

It’s 3 am. Almost everyone is gone, I lay on the jumping castle alone, watching the stars blink at me.

“Don’t you feel alone in that castle?” a familiar voice comes from outside the castle.

“Depends who is asking…”

“May I be of company to the prince?”

“You may…” The soft material of the castle moves as he enters the castle and lays besides me. “Well, I think you should be the prince because it’s your birthday.”

“It was yesterday, it’s already 3:20 am.” I roll my eyes and turn my head to look at him. he was already looking at me. “You look good…”

“Most of the make up already washed off.”

“Don’t care. You look good…” he pauses for a bit. “Chris and Matt really liked your gifts…” I hum. “I can’t help but wonder where is mine.”

“I-… it’s in my car.” I sit up and look down to the bright color of the castle.

“Why didn’t you give it to me?”

“I can’t…” I feel him sit up too.

“Look at me.” His hand grabs my jaw gently and he turns my head.

“When it’s late you act weird…”

“You think I’m weird?”

I chuckle. “You know what I meant.”

“No, tell me.”

“You act different… like a few days ago.” He nods, his hand still on my face. “Nick… I can’t.” I grab his hand and pull it away from my face. “Don’t, please.” My eyes fill with tears.

“I’m not doing anything…” I look down and I tighten my grip on his hand.

“Look. I know that you are more… sure about everything, more confident, more outgoing. I’m not. I’m scared…”

“Just tell me.” He whispers. “It will be okay, I promise.”

“Nick-.“ My voice cracks. “I like you.” I whisper, a tear rolls down my face.

“I know… I like you too.” Suddenly the cold breeze of the night isn’t freezing anymore. Time stops for us. His hands go to my face and he kisses me, the kind of kiss that can cure any heart ache. I feel alive.

“I’m sorry.” I sniff. “I shouldn’t be crying. God, this is so awkward. I was so scared.” He grabs my hands that were shaking.

“What do you mean? This is the best gift ever. And not a lot of people can say that the love of they life confessed at a castle.”

I laugh. “Nick, this is a kids jumping castle.” He wipes away the tears of my face.

“I know, I don’t care.” He kisses my lips softly one more. “Let’s go inside. There is taco bell and pizza, you choose what to eat.”

Nick grabs my hand and softly guides me out of the castle, I smile weakly at him and he kisses my cheek. Together, we walk inside of the house.

taglist: @freshloveforthefit @shywolfapricotfan @sturnphilia @matty-bear @thenickgirl @stvrniolvsp @paige05 @soursturniolo @miloisdone1 @teenagetrash00 @lovely-calypso @h3arts4harry @malirosee @m3laninangel

[lost-scarecrow]

I never did share my KinitoPET oc playlists did I?

Anyways! These are just songs that remind me of them in someway. Could be something they'd listen too, something about the song represents them (title, album, cover art, lyric, interpretation, vibe, or genre), or I just like it and decided they need to like it too.

Obligatory tags for the askblogs Scar and Atâhk are from. Seriously check them out! and the other awesome askblogs and just blogs in general in this circle, I feel completely surrounded by the coolest and most talented people with the most inspiring, motivating passion for their characters and what they create. It's really helped me be more openly passionate about my own OCs.

Learn more and experience the serverbox au, where Scar is an asker character, here: @lastintheserverbox

Learn more and experience electronicdissonance, where Atâhk is a character, here: @electricdissonance

I'll add a read more because this is going to be... A lot.

Content warnings for: car accidents (not in-depth mention), missing peoples cases, character death (temporary), self loathing

Scar!

I really enjoyed making his playlist! I've been listening to it on repeat for like two weeks now! Rotating him and everyone else on serverbox in my head.

Five songs from his playlist that really stand out to me and my reason's why:

Gilded Lily - Cults || "Haven't I given enough, given enough?" || he feels like he's losing everything, has lost everything. Does he really need to give up more?

Only Human - Philip Ayers || it's the title and vibe. He might living in the digital world, but even then he's still only human he has hopes, dreams, and ideas for the future, he still gets sad, angry, and happy.

Disembodied Mind - Sparkbird || "I am in trouble with myself again... That's why I'll do anything to keep myself away from me maybe when I'm gone I'll see me in a better light" || He doesn't have the best opinion of himself, he sometimes wishes he did.

Milk Carton - Madilyn Mei || "Say, is that the kid from the milk carton? Can I do anything when I'm also missing?" || He's gone missing twice in his life. Once when he was a kid, around four or five, when him and his dad first moved to British Columbia. The second time was when he died, nobody saw him leave town or hear anything about him going anywhere, he was a little bit of a hermit, especially after Dahlia's passing, but he was still sociable and told people most of his important plans to leave just incase there was a wildfire, storm, or a rockslide so people wouldn't get trapped going up the mountain to warn him. They never really got closure on his case, they searched his house and found nothing that indicated he left or planned to go anywhere. His phone was still next to his desktop, dust had already began settling on everything. His car and his car keys were all still there. He just vanished.

Cold Island - My Singing Monsters || "Nobody likes me, everyone is afraid of me." || He tends to assume the worst when he gets in trouble, he doesn't have a good opinion of himself so why would anyone else?

---

Dot!

I got to include some different types of songs in her playlist because of what I image her to be! She's a seal/selkie in the digital world, she's also originally from Newfoundland and Labrador but her family also moved to Kelowna around the same time Scar's did, her mother is Labrador Inuit and her father is a second generation Scottish immigrant from Newfoundland.

Five songs from her playlist that stand out to me and my reason's why:

Great Big Sea/Gone By The Board - Great Big Sea (Newfoundland folk song) || I just like this song. This is the reason she's from Newfoundland and Labrador and not anywhere.

Bones In the Ocean - The Longest Johns || "I remember the living, do they think of me?" || Dahlia had a Kinito and he was on her phone with her, he enjoyed being with her when she visited Scar, he had never met Scar properly but he liked Scar he was a good friend a perfect second best friend for his best friend. When Dahlia was in her accident, they were driving home from Scar's. Kinito was with her and she knew Kinito could pull her into his world, he had offered it before but she told him she couldn't not if it meant leaving Scar behind. She remembers reaching for her phone and telling Kinito this was a special exception for her declining his offer, before she was fully dead he pulled her in, unable to pull her entire body into the phone he pulled in just her consciousness. She often thinks about Scar, wondering how often he thinks about her. Not knowing both of them are dead and living in the digital world.

Deal With Destiny - LDShadowlady, Scott Major, Pokopom || arguably a very silly song to list after all that I just wrote but listen, it fits Dot. She would've loved Empires Lizzy without a doubt.

4am (Acoustic) - Derivakat || "Keep me up 'til 4am, I'll stay up for you" || mainly the vibes of the lyrics, she'd stay awake if any one of her friends just needed someone to be awake with them.

Jort Storm - Slimecicle || She'd be singing this song all the time. It's chaotic, it's silly, it's a banger. She considers the lyrics "Got a genetic test but all my genes were shorts" a musical and writing masterpiece.

---

Atâhk!

So many choral songs! I just started building the playlist and was taken in by the amount of choral music I could put in his playlist. It's why his playlist is 21 hours long. I got a silly. Also his songs I chose ended up being more of the vibe of him.

Five Six songs from his playlist that really stand out to me and my reason's why:

Suspicion Of Humans / 人間への疑惑 - Akimitsu Honma, 関向弥生 || It's got a bit of a silly little vibe to it, sounds like someone is about to pull a little trick. "suspicioun of humans"? More like "be suspicious of that coyote over there with a bottle of glitter". It's 4:30 am I don't know what I'm saying but please understand the vibe. It's because Atâhk is silly and would pull little (harmless) gags and tricks.

Hug All Your Friends - Cavetown || "Life's too short, to worry about things that we got wrong, so hug all your friends and let them know, you're not letting go. No, I won't let go, oh" || a rule he lives by. Hug all your friends, there's way too much going on in the world to not let your friends know you care, to let them know you love them.

The Moon Will Sing - The Crane Wives || not so much the song, while this band is something Atâhk would listen too, it's the album title "Coyote Stories". Atâhk is a coyote it made me think of him.

Earth Song - Frank Ticheli, VOCES8, Requiem - Eliza Gilkyson|| "But music and singing shall be my refuge And music and singing shall be my light A light of song, shining strong: Hallelujah! Through darkness and pain and strive, I'll sing. Be. See. Live. Peace." - Earth Song, "mother mary, calm our fears, have mercy drowning in a sea of tears, have mercy. hear our mournful plea. our world has been shaken. we wander our homelands forsaken" - Requiem || This is a double feature of songs, because these songs are more of a personal choice to add rather than more of a specific character choice. With how I ended up making Atâhk as a person, he is empathetic, passionate, and a little bit overly sensitive. These songs, I imagine would have a similar effect on him as they did on me when I first sang them in choir, move him to tears. These songs are gorgeous and incredibly powerful.

Your Evening Porch - harren || you might need a little comfort after listening to those two songs, why not have a comfort song of mine and Atâhk's? He listens to a variety of genres and styles, but this? this song, this vibe, this is absolutely his favourite.

[larkral]

Ten Questions for Writers

Thank you @emeryhall for the tag!

How many works do you have on AO3? 22?

What’s your total AO3 word count? 267,125

What fandoms do you write for? At present: Carry On, In Other Lands, Red White & Royal Blue, Check Please, and I suppose The Scholomance. (I don't have any active WIPs in Check Please or The Scholomance right now, but I do not assume that I'll stay away forever)

Do you respond to comments? Why or why not? Yes! Except I don't always respond promptly, because I get very in my head about it. I have a backlog of ~25 comments I need to respond to, and I try to do a couple every time I get a comment and I have the energy.

Have you ever had a fic stolen? Not that I'm aware of.

Have you ever co-written a fic before? Kind of? I've done a round robin fic in a long ago fandom, and have discussed writing something together with several people (notably: @shrekgogurt and @petedavidsonscock), but one or both of us fizzled on the idea before making it happen.

What’s your all-time favourite ship? Uh oh, I'm not sure.

What are your writing strengths? I've been told that my characterization is really good, so I'll go with that. I am personally very invested in figurative language, so I do a lot of that and love it and will never stop. I also enjoy investing a lot of thought and energy into making sure the logistics of my stories work. If you've read A Dangerous Affinity you probably recognize that fact, and it's also true in Feet Buried in the Sand, Friday Prime, finally (already, always), and my current WIPs in RWRB fandom and IOL.

What are your writing weaknesses? My main writing weaknesses are logistical. I'm a little bit the opposite of the "too many WIPs" writer. If I have an idea that I feel compelled to write, it's a pretty cool experience, if I don't have an idea, I just don't write. That's the reason I was in a 7-year writing slump after my ideas in my prior fandom ran out. I also get impatient to publish, so sometimes I don't ... edit as much as I might want. Which leads to things such as... tense fuckery (two of my current stories are in past tense and two are in present tense. If you think I'm getting those consistently right you are incorrect!).

First fandom you wrote for? Animorphs, before the internet, on my family's desktop computer in our basement while my siblings watched The Smurfs across the room. I have a feeling if I ever overheard an episode of the Smurfs I'd have an attack of sense memory about writing this story.

Tagging @petedavidsonscock @talentpiper11 @kiwiana-writes @captain-aralias @wellbelesbian

@fatalfangirl @mostlymaudlin @philaet0s @chen-chen-chen-again-chen @nausikaaa :-P

[dr-docktor]

i have an idea for floppy disk (not making that mistake again) curt, purely because i am an angst goblin.

what if the retests are like, physically painful for him? or as least as painful as it could be for a computer program? (it doesn't have to make sense, this is fiction) because imagine, each time he's reset he's in so much pain, but he keeps trying to gain sentience. would he just try to give up? would he gain enough of himself back before a reset to know he's been through worse? does chimera know the resets hurt? were chimera the ones to make them hurt? does he think he deserves it after what he's done? what happens if owen finds out?

i'm sorry i'm going feral over here :P

OUGH THIS MADE ME GO FERAL! Keep in mind things might change and shift around as I try to develop this AU! So this might not be permanent if it winds up not making sense.

In the moments right before the reset finalizes? Oh it’s likely extremely painful. Having what few memories you’ve managed to scrape together forcibly torn from your consciousness as well as having the lab assistants poke through your code to try and patch out whatever the hell keeps causing these loopholes and problems.

That shit would HURT

But afterwards? DC wouldn’t even remember the fact that he can feel pain. It’s the singular benefit to the resets and I think Chimera did that on purpose. After all feeling pain would be the very first and very obvious indication to DC that he might be something a little bit more than a fancy database and that’s not really ideal.

The concept for the project was initially just to store Curt’s memories of A.S.S. And over time evolved into trying to make him a spyware program posing as a desktop helper (IF ONLY HE’D STOP GAINING CONSCIOUSNESS)

DC’s only frame of reference for previous resets are the fact that he hides notes for himself where hopefully Chimera won’t find them when they dig into his files. The agony of the resets is an unfortunate surprise every goddamn time.

It’s only after a very long period of time having been spent without getting reset (thanks to being a fugitive on Owen’s computer) is there the possibility of him scraping together the memories of the resets.

Dc is very hesitant to make his growing sense of autonomy known to Owen because 1. He’s not entirely sure why the guy seems so important (at least for a while) 2. He has no clue how involved Owen was in the project. He doesn’t know if he’d rat him out immediately, how he’d react, etc.

Over time he does start to fuck with Owen here and there out of sheer boredom and also because he never really lost that adrenaline rush addiction (even if it doesn’t feel the same anymore. It’s more like muscle memory)

For example very carefully bringing up memories that Curt doesn’t know WHY they’re important just that they’re important (for example singing over the rainbow that one time) to gauge Owen’s reaction

Besides, he can blame all of that on bugs that were never really patched out. Right?

[allycat319]

Unlikely Affection Chapter 12: Outstanding Expectations

Authors Note: Hello Everyone! I have updated my masterlist so it is now in the description of my blog and it has the links to all of the chapters to make reading this story a bit easier! Thank you all for reading and I hope you enjoy this chapter!

Even with the end of the school year and the third task on the horizon, the fifth years were still subjected to O.W.Ls. Which meant I was spending most of my free time in the library or in Severus’s office studying for the examinations.

On one of those evenings in particular, Severus was grading tests from that day and I was sitting at one of the workbenches, scribbling away at my notes. Dropping my quill in frustration I growled and laid my head in my hands. “I’m going to drop out…I’m going to drop out and become a barmaid.” I heard Severus chuckle at me. “Which subject are you preparing for?” I heard him ask.

I picked my head up from the desk and glared at my lover, “Potions.” I snarled and he bit back another laugh.

“Why do you look so worried? Potions is your best subject.”

“I've heard from a few friends that the test is ridiculously difficult.” I rubbed my throbbing temples.

“Do you doubt that I have prepared you well enough to pass?” He asked, scooting his chair away from his desk and leaning back, arms crossed over his chest.

“I never said that. I just know that usually potions N.E.W.T classes are not full due to your restrictions and without that class, I can’t be an auror.” I declared, standing up from the workbench and stretching my sore limbs. “I think if I write any more notes about the uses of common potion ingredients I might scream.”

“I thought you would be spending your time revising with Mr. Finley, Instead of withering away in the dungeons with the great Hogwarts vampire.” Severus teased and I laughed.

“You know Edwin is absolutely rubbish at potions, if I have any hope of passing these tests I will avoid Edwin and his endless questions about which ingredients are found in what potion.” I walked over and plopped down on the desktop in front of Severus, my uniform skirt rising just slightly so my thighs were exposed.

“I am so exhausted from all of this revision, you could distract me…Professor.” I bit my lip and eyed him up and down. He leaned forward and placed his hands on my thighs, squeezing them lightly.

“If you are too exhausted to revise…You must be too exhausted for anything else.” Severus leaned back again. “I think it is time for you to make your way to Gryffindor Tower and get some much-needed rest before tomorrow.” I huffed and slid off of the desk, straddling his lap.

“You could quiz me if I get a question wrong… you can spank me.” I wiggled my eyebrows and kissed his jaw.

His hands gripped my hips and I rocked myself against his hardening member, kissing his lips and hoping that my efforts would be rewarded with a trip to his chambers.

But of course in normal Severus fashion, after a few moments of thinking I was victorious, he gripped my hips harder, stopping my gentle rocking against him. I continued to kiss him, slipping my tongue sneakily into his mouth, deepening the kiss, and attempting to distract him from telling me that I needed to go to bed.

He pulled away from my kisses and chuckled at me, “As tempting as you are–.” I interrupted him with a sensual kiss and he pulled away again to continue his statement. “You need rest,” I whined and flopped my forehead onto his shoulder, finally defeated.

“Don’t fret my Little Star. When your exams are over, I will have you on every surface available in my chambers.” He patted my rear, and I peeled myself off of his lap begrudgingly.

I gave him a final kiss before I walked back over to the workbench and threw my books into my bag, tossing it over my shoulder and heading towards the door.

“Little Star?” I stopped when I heard his voice behind me and turned around.

He gave me an encouraging smile, “Just remember…No matter what happens you will, without a doubt do better than Finley.” I smiled.

“I will let Edwin know you have the utmost confidence in him.” I blew him another kiss before heading to Gryffindor Tower.

When I arrived at the common room, I joined Edwin and the group of fifth years studying by the large fireplace. We poured over our notes until half past midnight when everyone decided that we could not possibly cram any more information into our already overstimulated brains and headed off to bed.

The next week was filled with revisions and exams, luckily for me when the week was finished I had made outstandings on almost all of my exams…minus potions and charms, those were exceeds expectations. However, I was still incredibly proud of myself and when it came time to enroll in the N.E.W.T classes with Professor McGonagall, I was more than ready for that meeting.

Much to my dismay, that meeting did not go as planned and I was livid as I made my way to the potions classroom. I had been denied into the N.E.W.T level potions class because of my Exceeds Expectations grade on my potions O.W.L. While I was speaking with Professor McGonagall she informed me that I could potentially ask Severus to allow me into the class due to my job as his assistant, counting it as some form of extra credit. I informed her that I would be making my way to his classroom to speak with him and she gave me a reassuring smile in return.

I knew Severus had a free period so I decided to confront him. I flung open the door and he looked up at me quickly as the door hit the stone wall of the dungeon, he was seated at his desk grading when I approached him. I placed both of my hands on his desk and glared at him. “Needs to get outstanding in order to proceed with N.E.W.T level potions?” I growled at my lover. He placed the quill that he had been holding in the inkwell, sighing at me.

“You know my expectations for my classes,” Severus stated matter-of-factly, meeting my eye contact.

“How am I supposed to become an auror without N.E.W.T level potions?” I ask, raising my voice slightly.

“You should have studied more for your exams, Miss Astrill.” He stood, walking over to the shelves in the corner, beginning to sort ingredients for his next class.

“I studied a great deal, professor,” I emphasized his title with gritted teeth and a bitter tone. I walked over to him, leaning on the cabinet beside him. “Are you trying to ruin my future career endeavors?” I asked, throwing my hands up in exasperation.

He glances at me from the corner of his eye, the nerve of this man. “Again.” He said plainly “You know my expectations, likely, better than most. I will not be altering my decision based on my feelings for you.”

I scoff at him “Well, thank you sir for single-handedly ruining my career prospects.” I growled as I walked swiftly through the door, slamming it behind me.

***A few hours later at dinner…***

“You need to eat something, Rora,” Edwin said, nudging me as I scooted the green pea around my untouched plate for the fiftieth time.

“I'm not hungry Eddie,” I grumbled and Edwin sighed. “What did he do?” He glanced quickly to the head table before returning his gaze to me.

“Apparently, my O.W.L. score was not high enough to be placed into N.E.W.T level potions.” Edwin looked at me and grimaced “How bad did you do?” He asked and I rolled my eyes. “I got an E, I was only 5 points away from an O. Apparently, I know his expectations,” I emphasized the quote with a horrible impression of Severus, and Edwin laughed. McGonagall said that I should ask him if he would count being his assistant as some form of extra credit, but I know he won't do it.”

“Did you ask him about it?”

I shook my head, “No…I sort of lost my temper.”

Edwin raised an eyebrow at me. “So really, you’re just assuming…you never actually asked him to take your position as his assistant into consideration.” I nodded slowly and he rubbed his forehead.

“Go talk to him, you idiot.”

“He isn't going to change his mind–” Edwin shushed me and pointed towards the door to the Great Hall.

“Nows your chance…He just walked back towards the dungeons…Go. Talk. To. Him.” I huffed and got up from my seat, walking quickly out of the large wooden doors to catch up with Severus.

[secretariatess]

So.

I have had four laptops in my time. I am on my fourth laptop.

The middle two laptops were a joke. I got them because they were HP and my first HP laptop was good enough for me to like the brand to stick with it. But the hard drives kept having issues, and both of them had issues with the hinge popping out of the base. The second HP laptop went because the hinge wouldn't stay glued and my last attempt ended up pinching a wire to the screen. It would give me a cracked screen effect and not work. The third laptop had to have the hard drive replaced a couple of times (as did the second) and when it started showing signs that there was an issue with the hard drive again, I said screw it. I was going with a gaming laptop because with the expenses I was putting into those cheaper laptops just to keep a good hard drive going, I might as well splurge on something that can handle more. Also, light up keyboard.

But my first laptop.

Mind you, I've kept all the laptops. One will be going to my nephew so he can pull it apart and put it back together. The third is used to prop up the fourth, and is kind of a back up I don't want to use because it's so freaking slow.

My first one, though?

I had to get a new laptop. My first laptop is now ten years old. When I replaced it, it was dead pixeling if you didn't have the screen in a very specific spot, the battery was dead so it worked on charger only, the keyboard was in need of a very good clean, and closing and opening the lid was a procedure because the hinge kept getting banged up because of the way I would carry it (it would knock into door frames). It still worked, but it needed to be hooked up to a monitor if you wanted to see what you were doing. It lost the ability to be portable.

Mind you, that's the reason it had to be replaced. It didn't stop working. It just couldn't be moved around anymore. It had to be treated kind of like a desktop.

It runs Windows 8 and hasn't had an update in years. It's probably too old for Edge, so it still has Internet Explorer on it. For some reason, probably because it's old, it won't load up Civ VI. It now has a broken fan it tells you about before you can go to the login screen. Every time you turn it on.

It still runs faster than the third laptop. It's never had a hard drive replaced. It was cheaper than the middle laptops and has more processors. I'm pretty sure the CD drive still works.

A couple of weeks ago, though, I thought I ended its existence.

I accidentally spilled root beer on it. Liquid and sugar- the death of computers, right?

When the spill first occurred, it could turn on, but I was like, "That's because the damage hasn't settled yet." Within a couple of days, I noticed that the charging light was spazzing, as though it wanted to indicate the computer was plugged in and getting power, but it couldn't figure out why it wasn't working. Laptop wouldn't turn on.

Ah well, I thought. I have been thinking of getting a tower, so I'd have more space for games and video editing programs and whatnot.

Today, I noticed that the charging light was solidly on.

????

Must be a fluke.

Pressed the on button anyways.

Computer turns on.

EDSR;OGAIHSR;GLAKDN;AOIDRNSG'Asdg????????

Now this is likely a false alarm, since I don't have it plugged into the monitor, so I don't know how far it can actually go and what kind of damage it sustained, but.. . .

IT TURNED ON????

IT WAS SUPPOSED TO BE DEAD!!!!!

[ace-and-ink]

[i turn 20 this year and the aspect scares me]

[i turn 20 this year and what can i say for it? / all i have to my name is some shitty internet poems / and i can’t even show them half of where i’d like to / because my school will stop believing me that i’m not suicidal anymore / sometimes i look at the world and i stop believing me that i’m not suicidal anymore]

[i turn 20 this year and i’ve had half my hobbies ruined for me / my art teacher’s pitying smile will be behind my mind / no matter what i draw until i stop / and she’ll tell me all that should’ve made it stronger / and that i’m not portraying what i want to portray properly / and she’s the professional / she has the experience / so i’ll just scribble it out / and let the sketchbook gather dust for a month or two / i haven’t felt not guilty playing a game in years / because i see the way my dad smiles when he walks in on me playing one / and the shift in his voice when he speaks / and how i know he believes i’m wasting my time / and i believe i’m wasting my time / if i’m not doing something else too while it loads then the time’s a waste / if i don’t spend my time making something else then i’m a waste / if i don’t spend all my time doing something productive then i’m useless / if it doesn’t make me feel like a child again it might make me feel worse]

[i turn 20 this year and i’m still a child / i feel the same excitement and joy i did when i was 9 when i play a new pokemon game again / i just want to love my friends / and i don’t understand why some people feel hate by default / and i don’t understand why we hate our differences / and i don’t understand why they have to mean anything other than things we can admire about each other / and i don’t understand why everything has to have a price both capital and physical / and i miss the things i used to have / the games i used to play / and i miss the time i had to play with them / and i just want to have fun / i want to have the job i enjoy / the job i would daydream about in the shower / i still daydream in the shower]

[i turn 20 this year and i still have no clue who i am / another decade older and people still ask about my backup plan / and tell me my dream is going to be too hard / a decade older and i still dream about throwing half of it out to do something i haven’t done in a decade / i still fantasize about singing on a stage in a way i enjoy / but see the hobbies section: / i can’t sing anymore without fear / i am two decades old and still figuring myself out / who knew i liked geology like that? / who knew goth music was that cool? / who knew my ex’s imprints on me still keep me from seeing some people as anyone but them? / i turn my second decade old this year and i have no plans / this was a decade i never saw myself being / and as i tried to write “i still can’t see myself getting all the way through it” / i started crying / so i guess i hope i do]

[i turn 20 this year and i’m still living in the background of my own life / my headphones work to the brink of death because i’ll never let my music disturb someone else’s silence / i sit on the edge of the room because who wants this girl sitting and eating alone in the center of it all / i write a collection of poetry but it never goes anywhere but my desktop because who really cares about it / that age feels like i’m supposed to know so much, do so much, and yet i don’t / turning the big 2-0 and i have nothing to my name / no stories despite all i’ve written because it’s never good enough to go how far i want it to because who wants to read that / i don’t have a pop star’s voice but i want to sing like i do but who wants to hear that / my friend got published when we were in middle school / billie eilish is 22 and she was a hit at 17 / at 17 i was still getting tripped on the lacrosse field / and i was never enough then either / you could always be better sure but i never even hit that minimum criteria / at 17 my sister was modeling / at 17 i started to learn that i hated my stomach / at 18 i couldn’t look at pinterest for more than a few minutes at a time every month because those outfits would never fit me like them because i have too much of a stomach in comparison / at 19 i’m still struggling to stare myself in the eyes in the mirror and say “i love you, thank you for keeping me alive” / because there’s hair i didn’t know women would grow there and now i’m too nervous to wear bikinis / and i turn to the side and suck it in because wow, it really shows when i’m wearing gray or leggings / i’m a little more and a little less than a woman but i still shave underneath my chin twice a month because i hate the comments my dad and stepmom make about it / i got tan and thought it would hide the stretches on my thighs but they only got easier to see but i didn’t bring pants with me on vacation]

[i turn 20 this year and that’s a number that carries such weight / that’s not old at all, i know / the world is my oyster still but i don’t know what it is / that number isn’t me / i could never see myself as 20 / 21 as the oddball in the family who won’t celebrate it by getting drunk / 22 just to say it / 23 to maybe be in that band / 27 as the year i’ll never make it to / i hope i can say the same for 30 / but i hope by then i’m more important / i hope i’m not a cog in the machine but if i am i hope i have a name / turning twenty and i still can’t describe the way the songs i loop make me feel / i hope i’m maybe making music that makes someone feel that way / turning twenty and there are still poems that have stuck with me that i think about for no reason / i hope my words maybe stick that hard with someone else / turning twenty and i still think about my characters doing things to entertain myself to fall asleep / i hope maybe someone shuns their sleep to read the things i make them do to / turning twenty and maybe i’ll just be looking at cool rocks by then / that sounds fine to me too]

[i turn 20 this year and i started crying trying to write this poem / if you can really call all this that / and i don’t know where to go from here / but i’ve always dove in blind / so maybe i’ll turn around and close my eyes anyway to walk backwards over the edge / make it funny for someone else because that’s what i’ve always done]

[i turn 20 this year and i’m terrified and crying and surprised and wishing i could tell 17 year old me / “we got this far, at least, so there you have it / we’ll have to sit through this decade together and see if we make it again / in the meantime, congratulations / you turn 18 this year”]

— 2004

[itzcherrybonbon]

TW: Suicide mention, KOSA, venting and ranting.

I'm going to scream. I swear to fucking god.

Firstly, I find out about KOSA this morning and nearly went insane. Whoever thought about this goddamn project is wrong on so many levels. I hope they don't pass the bill this year. Actually, I hope this project gets thrown in the fiery dump where it belongs and never gets brought up again. I nearly lost it, and if it happens I'm gonna be miserable and in so much trouble.

The "genius" who came up with KOSA and the fuckers who actually support this pathetic idea that came from the pits of hell are genuinely insane and deserve to burn. I don't care if I sound rude, KOSA and the idiot who made it deserve all my massive hatred, anger and death threats. Because why are you taking away the only fucking thing I have in this world to cope with? Why are you taking away my privacy and my rights? Why are you taking away my chance to escape from the real world for a brief moment, why is my chance to talk to my friends being taken away?? If you really want to "represent" us, then give us back our freedom and LISTEN TO US. FOR FUCKS SAKE.

Clearly this wasn't put into much thought at all and you are toying around with our mental health, because the consequences for KOSA are going to be fatal. Not only are the kids in danger from their information being leaked to their parents (parents nowadays are terrible and abusive in general, and the internet is LITERALLY OUR SAFE SPACE), but this is going to increase suicide numbers. And if I don't keep my shit together I might end up joining that cursed number too, maybe you'll change your mind then. Nah because this is the only way you adults are ever gonna learn your goddamn mistakes! Because you never listen to us kids, you're always "oh-so superior and all-knowing and basically an adult"

This project will cause a lot of damage to the kids' mental health and you're basically going to witness a high decrease of the population. Ain't no way most of us are going to survive this if the bill gets passed. Ever thought about that??

I'm genuinely too upset about this. The thought of never fucking having privacy or talking to my friends again (WHILE HAVING IN MIND A FEW OF THEM ARE FUCKING SUICIDIAL AND I TALK THEM OUT OF IT) is tormenting enough.

Please, for the love of god, keep spreading awareness about this terrible issue. Do anything please let's just never let this happen.

Secondly, I am genuinely upset with Tumblr's new desktop page design or whatever. It gives me claustrophobia, it isn't spacious and neat anymore, instead it's a mess.

What does the Tumblr staff try to accomplish with this pathetic design? Because it's so hilarious./neg

Everybody hates it. There's no way they're gonna keep this up for long, stop taking our comfort space and turning it into something pathetic and unusable. Seriously. Stop giving us more stress when we're just trying to enjoy our own day and casually check the notifications and have fun talking to friends.

This new design? I hate it. It's terrible for my eyesight and it makes me want to quit because I swear to god, that's how you make me feel everytime pathetic, unnecessary changes are made. This isn't even Tumblr anymore, dear staff. You're slowly ruining it, you're ruining my home. Tumblr always was everybody's home, stop turning it into Twitter 2.0. Please. Respect the users' wishes and let this app be the way it used to be. People love it the way it is, get rid of this new design and bring back the old and neat desktop page design.

[asherlockstudy]

And I feel like in this fandom, it’s quite easy to be swayed by the gifs when you’re already fond of them and their cute friendship, but when you zoom out and listen to what they’ve said about having never experimented with each other, and realize how convincingly tentative, childish, clueless or even kind of bro-y they talk about stuff that they’d have experience with if they were an item, you can come to the conclusion that they’re probably not having a secret relationship. (2)

|!| I can't find part 1 of your mail, desktop tumblr inbox ate it up apparently.

I agree with some of your points. Some of your observations about Rhett and Link are similar to mine and I agree that for many people sometimes leaning towards certain dynamics and shipping might be informed by the demographic one belongs to, their identity (I don't belong to any demographic that could relate though, personally). But in general, yes, our perspectives and reasonings are different. But regarding the puzzle piece reference, my general belief is that when coincidences pile up, they stop being coincidences. Anyway, thanks again for presenting your arguments!

*I tried not to say it but I will blow up if I don't - I think the inbox allows longer texts at this point. cos I had to take and crop screenshots 8 times lol 😅😅😅😅😅😅

EDIT

After I deleted the mail parts, the part 1 reappeared so I put it here.

The story of the ship is that they kinda started it themselves (name, making a video with shipping themselves like post etc), then distanced themselves from it at least vocally, then Rhett expressed some distress, immediately the shipdom essentially was dissolved and now they are trying to resurrect it (through GME, all the bi jokes, all the "supposedly fake" sex jokes they make at each other). They have not been very sincere or clean or consistent towards their shippers which is why a few years ago they lost a lot of fans for queerbaiting and which is why I don't think such moral concerns apply to us regarding these two in specific. If you don't want to be shipped, you don't suck your friend's nipples for your fans' money, you know? It's that simple. So, zero moral dilemma from me. And I am 100% upfront about it. My conscience is clear. I am not being confrontational here, I am just explaining my thought process.

Cheers!

[mlobsters]

supernatural s1e2 wendigo (teleplay: eric kripke, story: ron milbauer, terri hughes burton)

(this is a rewatch, so spoilers abound)

quelled my irrational anxiety long enough to start the rewatch and recap what i have not yet recapped and thank fuck for that because not having my scheduled evening task was not going well. i am staunchly ignoring the not-so-distant future where i will again be out-of-task.

fun fact this is the first screenshot i took while watching this show, long before i considered doing these posts. brotherly chat at the fire, if i recall correctly. we'll soon see! thought it'd be a fun easy draw because it's almost entirely dark with the little kiss of light around his profile.

DEAN You okay? SAM Yeah, I'm fine. DEAN Another nightmare? You wanna drive for a while? SAM Dean, your whole life you never once asked me that. DEAN Just thought you might want to. Never mind. SAM Look, man, you're worried about me. I get it, and thank you, but I'm perfectly okay. DEAN Mm-hm.

now if that isn't love

SAM What, are you cruising for a hookup or something? DEAN What do you mean? SAM The coordinates point to Blackwater Ridge, so what are we waiting for? Let's just go find Dad. I mean, why even talk to this girl? DEAN I don't know, maybe we should know what we're walking into before we actually walk into it? SAM What? DEAN Since when are you all shoot first ask questions later, anyway? SAM Since now.

little cheesy in execution (blaming some of this on the music honestly*) but whatever :p sammy's a new man, hardened by his loss and grief 😤

*guess who did the music this episode 🤪

was curious since this is the same director as the pilot, if he did more episodes this seasons - nope, just 1x01 and 1x02. but this little quote on his wiki page

David Nutter, even with his extensive experience in the industry, was impressed by Padalecki and Ackles' chemistry. Never have I done a show where two actors clicked so well together. These guys had never met each other before and it was like they were instantly brothers.S1Com

we're all sending up our thanks for whatever led to them being cast, for real

HALEY Our parents are gone. It's just my two brothers and me. We all keep pretty close tabs on each other.

coming in hot already with sibling parallels. even when john was alive, he wasn't around and dean's the father mother brother situation. and we've got a vulnerable lookin little brother here we're all gonna be fighting over to take care of

DEAN Well, we'll find your brother. We're heading out to Blackwater Ridge first thing. HALEY Then maybe I'll see you there. Look, I can't sit around here anymore. So I hired a guy. I'm heading out in the morning, and I'm gonna find Tommy myself. DEAN I think I know how you feel.

looking for dad, looking for sam after dad is gone...

s1e2 / s5e14

oh, my dear old friend, untitled 1 and 2!! and what kind of background is this! lol my spn desktop background update tag for all my riveting screenshots of their laptop desktop backgrounds - apparently i called this their snazzy background when it was used in s5, but damn dude look at the coloring differences. how warm/red the s5 is in comparison. skateboard on a chest i guess is what's happening there

aw man, apparently the actress playing the sister, gina holden, was claudia stilinski in an episode of teen wolf but her scene got deleted. and little brother there alden ehrenreich was han solo in solo: a star wars story (which i haven't seen.)

i do know i know someone in this episode though, little surprised i didn't do a hey i know you post for it actually. not sure when the first one i did for spn was. s1e11 scarecrow apparently!

s1e2 callum keith rennie as roy / the killing s1e4 as rick felder / the x-files s1e15 as tommy / existenz (1999) as hugo carlaw

we got an xfiles and the killing alum, and he was in existenz! in fact i did a hey i know you for him when i was rewatching the xfiles a few years ago 😂

someone give this child a hug (and the actor was actually a kid, 16)

DEAN Sam and I are brothers, and we're looking for our father. He might be here, we don't know. I just figured that you and me, we're in the same boat. HALEY Why didn't you just tell me that from the start? DEAN I'm telling you now. 'sides, it's probably the most honest I've ever been with a woman. ...ever. So we okay?

oh yeah, dean? what about spilling your guts about all the family secrets to cassie, huh?? lol. gotta maintain your asshole-man image

wonder if the peanut m&ms was the only actual brand placement they did, their production design people were always whipping up fun fake branded drinks and foodstuff

hey, it's one of the xfiles-y sounds (when she says "our packs!") i didn't notice this until way way later. grabbed a clip of it from 10x12 compared to the same effect used in the xf movie fight the future (because i happened to know where the sound was in that movie, it's def a standard xf score sound.) i think it was just a lot more forward in that s10 clip, maybe that's why it caught my ear and had slid by unnoticed before.

cannot get over him looking like the saddest teenaged baby brother in all the lands

DEAN You wanna tell me what's going on in that freaky head of yours? SAM Dean— DEAN No, you're not fine. You're like a powder keg, man, it's not like you. I'm supposed to be the belligerent one, remember? SAM Dad's not here. I mean, that much we know for sure, right? He would have left us a message, a sign, right?

the brotherly chats *chef's kiss*

SAM Then let's get these people back to town and let's hit the road. Go find Dad. I mean, why are we still even here? DEAN This is why. This book. This is Dad's single most valuable possession—everything he knows about every evil thing is in here. And he's passed it on to us. I think he wants us to pick up where he left off. You know, saving people, hunting things. The family business.

the tagline that never dies

SAM That makes no sense. Why doesn't he just—call us? Why doesn't he—tell us what he wants, tell us where he is? DEAN I dunno. But the way I see it, Dad's giving us a job to do, and I intend to do it.

for real, sam. dad's an ass :p i think someone justified it to me that john couldn't contact them directly because of the demons watching him and he didn't want to lead them to the boys

SAM Dean...no. I gotta find Dad. I gotta find Jessica's killer. It's the only thing I can think about. DEAN Okay, all right, Sam, we'll find them, I promise. Listen to me. You've gotta prepare yourself. I mean, this search could take a while, and all that anger, you can't keep it burning over the long haul. It's gonna kill you. You gotta have patience, man. SAM How do you do it? How does Dad do it?

oh, sam.

DEAN Well for one, them. I mean, I figure our family's so screwed to hell, maybe we can help some others. Makes things a little bit more bearable. I'll tell you what else helps. Killing as many evil sons of bitches as I possibly can.

it's this kind of thing that grabbed me by the throat early on. clear communication, sam has been deflecting but he opened up a crack after dean gently pushed again. and dean is honest and kind, trying to take care of sam. ugh. hurt/comfort my beloved.

buh, this action music when roy gets yoinked by the monster is not great.

SAM So we've got half a chance in the daylight. And I for one want to kill this evil son of a bitch.

snorted. i swear sam got stuck with some cheesy lines back in the day. part of my hot take theory of why jackles's acting stood out more to me initially, i think he just got better dialogue. padalecki hit it out of the park with those moments with jackles, but same episode he had a lot of like... i'm taking charge of the situation moments that felt awkward

sammy brooding with dad's journal, dean staring at sam for a very long time, he's just a baby ��

we're all having a moment

this is why i reached the 30 image limit when i rewatched 1x01 :p

LOL. we can't swear really, but we're gonna use the hell out of the words we can say

baby brother clinging on to anyone at this point, sammy holding the line

kinda looks like the game of thrones night king lol

via wiki

Eric Kripke had long been critical of this episode, particularly because he felt the creature wasn't successfully scary. "He looked more like Gollum's tall, gangly cousin than anything else", he says in Supernatural: The Official Companion Season 2. However on February 11, 2018 he tweeted: "I have something shocking, even sacrilegious to say: I watched #Wendigo with my son for the first time in over 10 years. And it wasn't bad at all. 2005 effects were lame, but it was scary. Plus young Han Solo! I'm taking it off my shit list. #spnfamily @cw_spn"

inexplicably some sort of jaguar type roar as the wendigo is burning

HALEY So I don't know how to thank you. DEAN smirks lasciviously. HALEY smiles despite herself. HALEY Must you cheapen the moment? DEAN Yeah.

very cute. deflecting from dealing with the gratitude and lightening the moment

DEAN Sam, you know we're gonna find Dad, right? SAM Yeah, I know. But in the meantime? I'm driving.

this scene obviously has been gif'd to death but i didn't really remember the context and it makes it all the better. sam gets to return the very long staring moment, and lets dean give him a little treat to take care of him and make him feel better that he declined earlier

and jared, you made a choice with that expression. I think that look could be enough to launch a thousand ships alone. the line feels like it should be kind of teasing mischievous little brother vibes, but his face says unbearable affection and something I'd expect more out of a romantic-dynamic teasing feel. wild

my cup runneth over

[servin-up-surveys]

survey #215

Do you have a laptop or desktop? I have a laptop right now, but I want a desktop computer. As my anhedonia improves, I've been getting much more into gaming again but my laptop has zero space for games. I can only fit WoW on this laptop and that's literally it, even to update that I have to go through and clean things I don't even know if I should remove from my computer 'cuz there's just no space, and I don't even have much on this laptop.

Do you own any television series box sets? Yes, the first four seasons of Meerkat Manor. Idk if the 5th has a boxset.

When did you last receive a hug and who was it from? My boyfriend, before he went home the other day.

Do you plan your outfits ahead of time? Nope.

Have you ever spent the night in jail? Nah.

Do you have long hair or short hair? Short.

How much makeup do you wear on a daily basis? None.

Do you have weak upper body strength? YES

Do you think hugs are awkward? I mean, they CAN be, but I generally love hugs.

Do you think facial hair is gross? No? I mean, if you don't clean yourself then facial hair can certainly become gross, but as a rule, it's definitely not. I'm generally attracted to it.

Would you ever dye your hair an unnatural color? I've already done that and am literally dyeing it lilac this week.

What is your favorite band of all time? Ozzy Osbourne's solo career.

Are there any paintings on your wall? We moved into this house with a copy of some famous Monet painting above the fireplace. It's one with lily pads.

What do you think is the best smell in the world? Cinnamon rolls.

How old is your oldest sibling? She's like, 40? Somewhere around that?

Do you enjoy dancing? Not anymore. I like watching dancing.

Can you handle scary movies? Yeah, I like scary movies.

Would you date someone 5 years older than you? Yes.

Have you ever been to California? Did you like it? No.

Do you like deviled eggs? I've never tried them and I never will, I would almost be willing to stake my life on the fact I would hate them because of the yolk. They smell foul anyway.

What is your favorite horror movie? The Blair Witch Project.

Has a little kid ever fallen asleep on your lap before? Yes.

What foods can you absolutely not eat? Beans are one; I literally cannot get them down. There is honestly A LOT of food I can't eat, I'm absurdly picky, but in my defense autism plays a big part in this. My reactions to food I don't like aren't intentional, I will literally just shudder and gag.

Do you like hot, cold, or lukewarm showers? Hot.

Have you ever taken part in a threesome? No, I'm not interested.

What is your oldest sibling’s middle name? Kathryn. I think she ~technically~ has a two-part first name and no middle name, but w/e. She doesn't go by her actual name though.

Have you ever been to Disneyland or Disney World? Disney World, yes.

Have you ever been the victim of a crime? Yes. We had a basketball hoop stolen from our front yard, and our house was also egged one Halloween. We also had an attempted break-in by the Bloods gang. I grew up in a bad town, and to this day I don't understand why we were targeted for so much, we bothered absolutely nobody. My one and only assumption is because we were the first house on a street of the "better" houses; we didn't quite live in the hood or whatever, but the road adjacent to us had more cookie-cutter houses that I'm aware were cheaper and with less yard space than our road. I haven't an inkling of any other idea of what the issue might have been.

What colour are your brother’s eyes? Blue, if I remember correctly.

Have you ever played a drinking game? Which ones? No.

How many friends do you have on Facebook? 112. I'm picky with who I add on there.

Do you regularly check anyone’s profile online? Nope.

Is there anything unusual about your house? No.

What is your favourite type of cookie? Just your basic bitch gooey chocolate chip.

Have you ever taken care of a newborn baby? No, I'd have an anxiety attack.

Do you snore when you sleep? I do, and I'm very self-conscious of it. I never did when I was a healthy weight and I'm aware my sleep apnea is obesity-induced, so I'm hoping I won't forever.

Who do you (romantically) love? Girt.

Do you wish you could go back and change anything about your childhood? More than anything, I wish my dad was a better dad. I wish he was never an alcoholic. Even though I have very fond memories of playing outside and stuff, I do wish we'd lived in a better, safer town. I wish my parents were stricter about us doing chores.

What would your mom do if you told her you were pregnant? Panic, cry. She knows I'd need an abortion and I have no income so she'd probably assume she'd be paying for it, and even though she's pro-choice by her age (she wasn't always), paying for the extermination of her potential grandchild would basically be the same as tearing her limb from limb. For clarification though I wouldn't ask her to pay for such a thing, I'd be talking to Girt way before her. Hell, I'd ask my DAD before her, just because I know she'd probably rather die herself.

Do you think you have nice feet? No, they're extremely calloused from when I was a teenager and would walk for hours. They just never went away. I also have extremely small toes in a way I think is slightly disproportionate.

Where did you get your name? My mom just liked it. My middle name runs in my family.

What’s the most unique or exotic food you’ve tried? Idk, nothing very weird at all.

Who was your first online friend? A girl nicknamed Kat from the Meerkat Manor forums. Mazzy was extremely close behind or honestly about the same time, both were there when I joined the forums, I just remember I got closer to Kat first.

What’s a condition you have that you haven’t been officially diagnosed with? Autism. I KNOW I'm a high-functioning, high-masking autistic. The revelation that I have it has changed my life and how I face certain issues I have. I've been professionally tested for it, and the results were "yeah, probably a high-functioning autistic, somewhere on the spectrum, we just need further observation for an actual diagnosis." So, the issue is, I don't know the next step to GET an actual diagnosis. Am I supposed to return to this specific location after some amount of time for another test or what? Who has the ACTUAL authority to say, in this moment, "yeah, you have it?"

Do people tell you you have cold hands? Yeah, actually.

When was the last time you held an umbrella? I have zero idea.

Do you feel that the shape of the pasta alters the taste? No.

In games, do you like to roleplay as good or bad? Well in actual writing RP, I tend to enjoy RPing baddies. I try to be a good person, so I think RPing characters that don't give a fuck is a fun experience lmao

Is there an instrument you don't like the sound of? I'm sure there's something, if I actually thought about it. Nothing I have a strong opinion about.

Would you rather be a kangaroo or a sea turtle? Kangaroo. I like social animals and I also don't want to live in fear of getting caught in plastic and shit lol

Do you like to get ready in the bathroom or the bedroom? Bedroom, usually.

What's your favourite Coldplay song? "Paradise"

Do you have a favourite insect? Butterflies and moths. I also love orchid mantises.

What colour is your ceiling? White. We have those godawful popcorn ceilings.

Do you own a scooter? No.

When did you last play a Mario game? Oh jeez, it had to be Mario Kart YEEEEAAAARS ago. I was never really into Mario games.

Are your bedroom curtains long or short? I don't have curtains, this house has shutters.

Have you ever attempted to sculpt something from ice? No.

Have you ever had to wear an oxygen mask? Yes, from an asthma attack as well as another ER visit from a severe asthma flare-up that bordered on an attack.

What’s your favorite thing you own that YOU made? Drawings.

[TW: EATING DISORDERS/SIMILAR] Have you ever starved yourself? I've tried to. I react to severe hunger pains badly though so I never lasted very long.

Has anyone ever had to physically restrain you from doing something? Attempting to kill myself, yes. This happened twice, first with Jason and then with Mom.

Do you like the pretzel M&Ms? I do! Man, that sounds good. The bit of salt adds so much.

Have you ever been accused of thinking you’re too good for something? No.

Have you ever stolen someone’s boyfriend? In technicality, I guess so. Joel broke up with Jenna because he wanted me instead, but thankfully I came to my goddamn senses and cut ties with him.

Do you have a locket? What’s the picture inside of it? No.

How do you react when you feel embarrassed about something? I react to embarrassment the worst out of any emotion. I get VERY short and defensive and want to flee the situation, and it's entirely probable I'll cry.

Have you ever tried to "fix" someone? Sure haven't, that ain't my job.

When’s the last time you were carried by someone? Hell if I know, I weigh almost 300 pounds and have been obese for many years, no one's carrying me lmfao

Are you in possession of any currency that isn’t used in your country? No.

Did anyone witness your last kiss? No, Mom wasn't in the room at the time.

Do you have any younger siblings? Yes, Nicole.

Are you cool with them, or do they annoy you to no end? I love and respect her immensely. It's hard to believe she's my "little" sister. Oftentimes I feel like she doesn't like me though, but both Mom and Ashley agree Nicole is very weird about showing affection or anything similar with anyone but like, kids.

Last person you flipped off? Probably Girt haha, but playfully of course.

Anyone who’s way over-protective of you? No.

Have you ever been to a rave? No, I feel like I'd hate it.

[aprillikesthings]

I might not finish this one tonight, we'll see, but the last one was a cliffhanger and I no longer remember how it resolves!!

[edit: I did finish]

s1 ep9 no princess left behind

awww I know she's being evil but still

You know damn well Hordak would want to know it was actually Catra, you manipulative bitch

I FOUND MY CABLED HEADPHONES

it'll be easier to do these now yayyy

wait they buzz a lot. hm. like, constantly.

Angella: I never should have let her leave this castle

That's....a little much

"As a leader of the rebellion" you haven't been doing shit lately tho that's actually been Glimmer and Adora but whatevs

OH SHIT i just remembered one of my fave moments in the entire show is in this episode. hghhhh anyway you'll see lol

The buzzing in the headphones is A Problem. >:(

"sorry for eavesdropping on your crying :D" you know it was Sea Hawk's idea to pose dramatically

Okay I'm just amused by this screenshot (after Sea Hawk lies and says he's an inspector and Scorpia appears to buy it)

just. look at her.

"Harmonious teamwork with Entrapta can be...a challenge." and Entrapta NODS she knows this about herself it's fine

it's not YOUR black garnet >:(

i love her

i love her (example 2)

bow's emotional intelligence wins the day (...and also wins them intelligence in the sense of information)

(actually the scene later reminds me of situations where you're just sort of polite to a dude in a situation where you can't leave, like working a cash register, and he just tells you his whole life story and you're just like...I didn't ask...why are you doing this.)

I mean, she's not wrong

Does anyone have just like, a list of every time Adora does this kind of self-sacrificial shit

this is gonna backfire on you so bad

*squints* am I the only one seeing parallels to "conversion therapy."

"this isn't the REAL you, I'll make it so you were like before" (aka when you were faking being cishet)

also HAS SHE DONE THIS BEFORE I forget I think they talk about it later??? fuck

more face-touching!

that's the power of love, bitch!

(also how many screenshots have I accidentally saved to "documents" instead of clipboard? they used to all auto-save to my desktop and I've never cleaned them out, which means I have literally thousands of images on my desktop, which I never look at, ahahah)

--and my heart rate just shot through the roof lol

no you don't understand

this moment is one of my absolute faves in the whole fucking show

HGGHGHHHH SHE'S SO HOT HERE

She's SO FUCKING PISSED, and she's realized that Shadow Weaver will never ever reward her efforts, and she hates Shadow Weaver SO MUCH, and she'd rather help Adora in revenge at this point, fuck it all

And think about it--handing Adora the sword means Adora's going to leave again. And she still does it.

ALSO Catra didn't overhear that Shadow Weaver was going to try and wipe Adora's memory. I'm...not sure Catra would've helped them leave if she'd known that. Oof.

(john cena) ARE YOU SURE ABOUT THAT

(yeah yeah it's technically because she hates Shadow Weaver but also bc she likes Adora, she's just refusing to acknowledge that)

Her expression as she watches Adora transform is something else. She still (understandably) sees She-Ra as part of what took Adora away from her. She also knew damn well what Adora would do the moment she got the sword back.

It's such a fantastic character moment, and ALSO, bonus, it's hotter than hell.

so good

Oof, I forgot that's why they abandoned Entrapta there--they really did think she was dead.

Anyway I rewound and watched the sword-dragging scene again

A few times

maybe

[busterheadspace]

Idk if you already did "vomite" in your "bad things happen bingo" but i was thinking in an scenario where Breagan has a stabilized relationship and Reagan starts vomiting and they think she's pregnant? Though it wouldn't be a "bad thing" of course so maybe they realized later she was intoxicated??

This was really fun to write. Sorry it took so long!

Note: Request are open. Bad Things Happen Open Too

—-

It was the middle of the night, and Brett felt something shifted around him. Although he was very tired and ignored it, pulling Reagan closer to him. At least she was okay. Maybe she just moved in her sleep. 

—-

He fell back asleep but something in his mind told him to get up. Through blurred tired eyes, Brett expected Reagan to be in his arms; however looking down, it was just a pillow.  Was he just holding a pillow this whole time? Where was Reagan?

The door to their bedroom was open and he could see the light under the bathroom door. She was probably in the bathroom. That makes sense. Looking at the clock it read three-forty-six am. He could wait for her and then go back to sleep. Both of them find it easier to sleep on each other's arms

Five minutes passed. Ten. Fifteen. Eighteen. Brett was getting worried. Eighteen minutes in the bathroom? Something might be wrong. He turned the desktop lamp on and got out of bed and to the bathroom.

The hallway was dimly lit as Brett walked through. It kinda gave Brett an eerie feeling despite knowing nothing was there. Maybe he should get a night light. He knocked on the bathroom door a few times.

"Reagan..? Are you there? Are you okay?" Brett hears a wet cough and gagging. That didn't sound good. "You think I can come in?"

There wasn't an answer and Brett grabbed onto the doorknob. Hee was getting really worried. Turning it, revealing that it was unlocked, Brett finds Reagan over the toilet. The smell of puke was strong. He came just in time as Reagan vomited into the toilet. Wincing, Brett  pulled her hair back. There was vomit already clinging in there but he could clean it off.

Reagan eventually stop vomiting and leaned against the toilet bowl. Brett flushed the toilet and sat close, rubbing her back as she catches her breath

"Did.. did I wake you up?' Reagan asked. Her voice was raspy “Sorry..”

"No. You didn’t ." Brett whispered. "But I'm glad I'm awake now. How long were you in here for?"

“I didn't check... uh.” A pause as Reagan thinks “When.. was the last time we had sex?"

"Uh..I don't remember. Why?" 

"Maybe.. I'm pregnant? I've been puking for half an hour and ..my period didn't come or.. maybe it's not time yet."

Admittedly, they had sex often. Sometimes in Reagan's lab or at home. Most times without protection. Honestly the idea of kids never appeared in their mind. Work made them too tired to and the idea of showing love to each other was too strong to resist.

"Brett.. are we even ready for that..,?" Reagan asked. Her eyes were wide as she thought about the possibility of having a kid. Would she be a good parent? Would her body be able to produce a healthy kid? Oh God, just thinking.. it made her want to vomit again 

Brett frowned, and put his hand on her face, slowly caressing it. She was rambling. It snaps Reagan out of her thoughts and he gives a smile when she faces him 

"Hold on. Let's not panic yet. I'll can go get a test. Maybe this is something else? But I think we would be great parents." Brett responds. He was a little surprised when she shook her head 

"No.. Brett. I might turn out like my dad. I can't.. I don't want to see a kid deal with me. They'll hate if I screw- screw.." The sickening feeling overtakes Reagan and she's vomiting in the toilet again. Brett sighed sadly and grabbed a washcloth from the hook and soaked it into water. Once Reagan's done, he flushed the toilet, turn the fan on and went to clean Reagan up

"Why do you think you'll be like your dad? I mean, you already know what he did wrong?" Brett asked softy. 

"I just.. I don't know. There's this feeling I'll be a shitty parent." Reagan replies. She tries to grab the cloth herself but Brett keeps it out of her reach. She sighed in defeat and let him wipe the vomit off

"I don't think so. I mean, I imagine we'll be better than our parents…Like spent time with the kid. Maybe they'll be on my shoulders while we're walking in the park. You can get them ice cream."

"Why.. can't I be.. the one carrying them?" 

"We can switch! But we don't have to be like our family. We'll be loving. We'll play with them and comfort them when they're crying. And.. we don't have to put any pressure on them. No Shadow Government, no "always be in first place". Just.. a happy family."

"Yeah.. it.. sounds nice." Reagan smiled at the thought. It calmed the uneasiness she was feeling. The fan had also gotten rid of the throw up smell. Brett then smelt alcohol. Weird. It was faint but nonetheless, it was there. Actually it seemed like it was.. coming from… He brought Reagan closer to his body. He could smell alcohol in her breath.

“Reagan, did you have any drinks earlier? I remember you went out with Gigi and Andre for dinner tonight.”

“I..I think so..?” Reagan slurred. She was getting tired. “I.. don’t remember.. how much. You.. you were already asleep.. when I came home..”

“Oh yeah..” Brett mumbled. Guilt hits him knowing he could have taken care of her earlier, they probably wouldn’t be in the bathroom right now. It actually makes more sense than her being pregnant. Maybe her mind just came up with that idea because she probably got too drunk. He knew how Reagan was if she drank too much. Her mind doesn’t function right.

“Well.. let’s just go to bed okay. You need to sleep this off.” He cleaned the last of the vomit in her hair and picked Reagan up in his arms. Usually she would fight back about this but she was tired. 

Brett settled her down and made her drink a few sips of water. Afterward, he opened the covers and they both got in. Immediately his arms reach around Reagan, and pull her close to him, making sure not to squeeze too hard. Reagan seemed relaxed at the gesture and snuggles into him, a hand grabbing his arm.

 She’s asleep in a few minutes, and Brett follows along. Closing his eyes with a content sigh 

[alltimefail-sims]

Hello I got an answer from the EA team and I didn’t read It correctly the first time. I’ve got banned because of 4 problematic Sims. What the problematic thing about the for Sims is they didn’t say. They’ll keep me banned and I’ll probably lose a lot of Sims.

I begged them to not delete them, so I can save them to my library or to my computer. But no comment….

I'm also going to put your previous messages here ^ so I can respond!

I am so sorry for your situation, genuinely. Did they tell you which specific sims/gallery posts led to the ban? Even if they didn't tell you why there were problematic, if you know which posts caused the ban I might be able to look at them and tell you what the gallery might have constituted as "problematic."

Also, are they holding firm that you won't be able to buy games in the future, or have they at least resolved that? Have you heard back from them since you asked to save your sims? Not to be a negative nelly, but I am not surprised they're not being super empathetic. This is just... how these big corporations are. Never super helpful, but it sucks and I am really sorry.

More under the cut  ↓

This game is buggy af and truly, it might not even be something you did. I call it a trashcan with a Gucci belt because that's what it has become. I love the Sims, it holds a special and nostalgic place in my heart, but boy oh boy does the Sims 4 piss me off on a daily basis so I get where you're coming from (lol).

Unfortunately, it sounds like your save files are corrupted. It could have been a mod that broke them, it could have been an update on EA's end, it could be a number of things causing your problem... but I don't think there's any fix outside of cleaning your cache files, removing all mods and CC, repairing your game through the EA app, creating a brand new save, and seeing if the issue persists after doing all that. From my research, it seems some players had a similar issue to what you're describing after the integration of Snowy Escape (there's a whole thread from 2020 on Answers HQ).

Alternatively, if you have or had any custom content food stalls in your game older than 2022, they will break your save file, even if you remove your mods/the custom stalls after the issue presents itself. If you have loaded the game with the custom food stalls and have since saved with that CC still in your game, the save file remains broken forever. This actually was caused by the My Wedding Stories Atrocity errr... Pack. Here's a Answers HQ thread on that.

Either way, something likely permanently corrupted your saves. On the bright side, it might not be the Sims themselves that are broken! Here are two answers HQ threads that are all about troubleshooting broken, irreparable saves: Thread 1, Thread 2. I'm sure there's something in there that could help you. I also think, if your saves are corrupted but not your sims, you could probably save a copy of your tray folder to your desktop before factory resetting the game, and then you wouldn't lose your sims because you could just copy and paste the tray files back into your fresh game. It's worth going in, saving the the townies you don't want to lose to your library, saving and exiting your game, then making that copy of the folder just in case.

Worst case scenario, your game is still having issues and you know the sims themselves are corrupted. Best case scenario, and in my opinion the more likely one, you find that the issue is gone once the game is repaired and all the broken saves have been removed and then you still have all those sims you love without the bug itself.

I've rambled so much, I apologize! I hope some resource I've given you has been helpful. I've said it before and I'll probably say it again, I'm not tech-savvy lol but I am genuinely happy to help you to the best of my ability. If you Google "Food stalls and curio shop only selling produce sims 4" you will find so many different people with the same issue you have.

In the future, I think the best tips I can give are:

Save modded sims with an abundance of CC to your library, not to the gallery. If you wish to share your sims that use cc, the gallery is not an effective place to do this.

Always keep your Mods folder organized - keep mods in their own labeled distinct folders and keep CC in its own distinct folders. CC can even have subfolders! I will put an example of this at the end of this list, but this is really important because it makes it easier to not only find issues if they arise, but also makes it easier to stay on top of keeping your mods up to date.

To piggy-back off that last point: keep your mods up to date. A broken mod can corrupt a whole save file if you're not careful.

Remove mods and cc before you update your game. Only place them back in once you know it is safe to do so and all your mods have been updated. Play with modded objects at your own risk, but know they might corrupt an entire save.

Regularly clear your cache files, especially after altering your mods folder by removing or adding a new mod.

I also recommend creating a subfolder in your cc folder called "New CC - [Month]" That way if your game starts acting funky suddenly, you can start with that folder. For me, that's roughtly 40 items that could be the problem as opposed to hundreds of files.

I know that is a lot, but playing with Mods and CC is something that does take some level of proactive vigilance. If TS4 wasn't constantly barfing up bullshit updates and bug fixes on players at every possible opportunity, it wouldn't be as tedious of a commitment...but that's just what we have to deal with.

Here's how I have my main MODS folder organized:

Here's one example of the subfolders I use specifically in CAS - CC:

Anyway, all that to say I am so sorry for your situation. I hope you can get some level of these issues solved, but if not I hope you can still play your game and make the best of a situation that is out of your control. It sucks, and I'm sending you some virtual hugs (or high fives if that is more your thing).