#then a few days passed i remembered
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Welcome to the "i have finished the tged novel and is going insane" club! How do you feel about Kim Suho being Lloyd frontera and Lloyd Frontwra being Kim Suho? Also, how do you feel about the reunion scene at the apartment in the end?
eyyyy thank you thank you, also im gonna answer below read more because there are spoilers
IT'S A LOOP!!! that's what i was screaming when i read that part. i like it but i actually don't have a lot to say about it? it's like a neat detail that i go insane from time to time. i wanna analyze the shit out of it though but honestly i really can't put it into words, so i'll sit out on this one. just know i go insane over og!lloyd's promise to be diligent.
THE REUNION SCENE!!! PROBLABY MY FAVORITE THING OUT OF THE NOVEL!!!! THAT WHOLE CHAPTER HAS MY HEART!!!!
kim suho realizing the fact that all he did for the frontera estate as lloyd was all for nothing? kim suho who thinks it's so unfair for him to go back like it's nothing? kim suho punches a mirror out of pure hurt? kim suho checking iron-blooded knight to see there are no traces of himself? kim suho going to the namsan tower to see the love lock railing and to see that it's still there? kim suho eating kimbap alone in his gosiwon and realizing that he's gonna rot in there for the rest of his live? mwah perfection
and the reunion oh my god. javier crying and saying "i miss you lloyd" my fucking god. brain worms are wiggling because of them my god.
i have some other alternations i wanna make of that scene because i am like That™ but those are secrets~ also planned fics~ so you won't ever see them. aha.
thanks for the ask! goodbye
#rara ask#the greatest estate developer spoilers#tged#sorry it took a few days to answer#i was writing it but i did something else#then i forgot about it#then a few days passed i remembered#anyways#yeah. them.
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hi….! any chance we can see your art process ? it’s fine if not! i was wondering if u do a sketch before your lines or you just skip directly to lineart? your art is very beautiful!
HI!!! AUGGHHHJHH THANK YOU SOOOO MUCH T__T my art style is kinda simple imo so my process is pretty bare-bones ^^;; there's not rly much too it!! it also kinda changes depending on how uhhhh lazy im feeling in the moment HAHA
probably around half of my drawings are straight to line art bc they're rly just doodles or things i decide to draw without any planning (but also im kinda impatient so i try to skip the sketching step if i can LOL...). but if i DO have a specific pose in mind for a drawing, i'll start with a sort of mannequin sketch or loose pass, then depending on how messy it is, ill either do the lineart pass on the layer on top or duplicate the sketch and then clean it up.
and then my coloring process is not sophisticated at all i just create a new layer and then paint bucket tool away LMAOOOO
here's an example of a drawing where i did sketch first ^_^
#clarification on the second image: usually when i make changes to the sketch i just go straight to lineart rather than doing a second pass#which i what i did for this drawing. i just like to minimize how many sketch passes i do (again bc i am impatient and lazy lol)#but also bc personally i get frustrated when my lineart doesnt turn out like my sketch so the solution my brain came up with is to..#...skip sketching i guess LMAO;;#idk if this was helpful or not AHGHAAH my process is rly nothing fancy and there's not much to show T_T;#ALSO OMFG IM SOOOOOO SORRY THIS TOOK ME SO LONG TO RESPOND TO GKJFHDJG THIS WAS SENT LIKE A MONTH AGO I THINK T_____T#i saw this when i got off the plane coming home from a trip and then i remembered it a few days later#but then in the middle of writing my answer i left to eat dinner and forgot to save so when i came back the page refreshed#and deleted everything i wrote T____T AND THEN IFORGOT ABT IT AGAIN
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Random Chimp Event happened and I wont be able to make the sorcerer!kristen design sketches presentable for a while so here they are in current form for now. yayayayaya
#not art! yet! gods I wish I could sit with these today and finish em#but alas. early day tomorrow. and probably for the next few days#funny how kristen and fabian are continuing the canon tradition of being best bros with their class swap jy design#two people you'd find at a dock#aaaalmost switched her arcane focus to an umbrella in jy but then remembered thats arthur aguefort. I cant do that to her#this is it for now. see u in a few. I must lay down and pass out. everyone have ok dream for me please.
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I am not cut out to be a writer, never was. I don't have a consistent schedule, and the weight of wanting to provide for those few who enjoy my writing crushes me eventually.
I don't know why I decided to be one.
#'remember to write only for your own joy'#i know that#yet not a day passes without guilt for not writing *when i could*#'do not compare yourself to others'#that is harder to do than to say#i am surrounded by extremely talented and skilled people who enjoy creating art so much i am nearly envious#sorry for the rant#feel free to ignore me i am just rambling to myself here#but i have one more thing to say#i am afraid to finish unfamiliarity#those few have waited for its ending for so long now that i don't think they will find it satisfactory
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Hey all! It's been a very long time since I made a post on this blog (I do keep an eye on everything from afar) but I wanted to share something really cool and very special that happened!
Over the weekend I went to MCM Comic Con in London and I had the privilege of meeting Andrew Scott (I still can't quite believe it!)
He was so SO lovely and the entire experience was just amazing. I got to gush about how much I love his work and how much it helped me through some of my own life experiences being Bi and Trans - he listened so intently to everything I had to say and asked me so many questions, it was just wonderful to have that time with him and I feel very lucky.
After we had a chat he signed the beautiful print above for me and took such care in writing me a lovely message that just really warmed my heart. He really is just such a wonderful caring person and I will pass on to you all what he said to me as I left his table: "Don't stop making your tribe bigger." Surround yourself with people who can support you and who you can support in turn, love people and be loved because there can never be too much love in the world. I know how kind-hearted you all are, and I couldn't be more thankful for this little space we've created in our corner of the internet.
Thank you all.
Love and Hugs,
Max
#andrew scott#text#i cant remember the tagging system i set up for this blog sorry holly LOL#he truly is one of the most wonderful people ive ever had the pleasure to meet#also yes i told him about the blog#i mentioned it in passing and he asked me a few questions about it so he knows it exists now haha#thank you all for reading this post and still being here all these years after i made the blog!#i wish my thoughts had been more coherent when i met him yesterday#but thats what i get for standing in queues for a combined 9 hours the day before
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ok yeah i think i might be entering the critical Autumn Madness period actually
#nothing feels real and time is some kind of thick jelly and I Forgor.#it's getting real difficult to order my thoughts & speech again. you know how it is. or oh well i hope you don't!#i cant believe i wrote this poem less than a week ago? it's like a singular moment that feels like a dream and is suspended in Nothingness#and i remembered the moment & experience that led to its creation but not the actual poem itself - not something which happens usually#might as well have dreamed it#so i just. uh. rediscovered it. feels like an eternity has passed#but it's only been four days#what have i been doing these past four days?#mystery#i remember a few things but cant account for the rest of my activities. bit scary innit!#merely writing these words is proving a uphill battle also. slurry in my skull#we Are struggling
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OC Crossovers (1/3): Tea Time with Myr and Lidija (@myrmyrtheorca 's OCs!) Kurumi may or may not be telling Lidija about shoujo manga while Myr is just chilling there and relaxing from the nice atmosphere.
#khr#khre#khr oc#oc#einart#ninomiya kurumi#khr killer whale#myr killer whale#lidija killer whale#myrmyrtheorca#ninomiya kanako#me trying to cope from the hell level temp that is a SEA country temp#by imagining it's around the transition of autumn to winter there#and they're having warm tea while discussing various topics in a kotatsu#i say while suddenly remembering how i opened the faucet earlier and the supposed cold running water is already preheated by the weather#ALSO THE 1/3 COUNTER IS FOR REAL THIS TIME I ALR HAVE 2 OTHER SKETCHES WITH OTHER FRIENDS' OCS PROCESSING IN GL4ZE RN#bc the other times i put a counter it didn't end up having a next part sdjfbsdfjhbds#also yeah those tea are csp 3d assets lmaooo if im gonna be fr here i only know how to draw beautiful wome--- i mean people#plus my body pain is flaring like crazy the past few days i keep passing out#so i can't do full colored pieces too much ueueueue#BODY PAIN WON'T STOP ME FROM DRAWING OCS THO#anyway i hope i was able to draw myr and lidija correctly; did my best to do so sdjfshjvf they're so 🥹🥹💖💖#i esp think lidija and kurumi would get along a lot#then myr would often get caught off guard by kurumi's compliments hehe#kana is just sizing them up and observing from afar; she's just very wary like that#wow im glad they do those “see more” thingie for tags so i can go free real estate in here
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2025 please be kind to me
#this year has been nothing but grief. i cannot take another#my cat midnight passed so i’ll be taking a few days away#be kind to urselves and remember that fishy loves u <3#shouting in the void
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this line... perhaps someone (me) should kiss that headache better!
#ash rambles 💚#heart-to-heart combat ⚔️#muah! healing kisses!#man ajshajsj can you believe how long it's been? almost.. four years now? of the two of us? veteran's pass for you if you remember when#this was just a blog about him!!#these days he's such a warm comfort to me ajdhajsjs I'm glad our love has lasted even though I've changed so much these past few years#whether or be growing up or irl stuff.. he's been there#muah!!! i love him soooo much! hehe i love my f.elix and i always have+#*!#hope he loves me too 👉🏽👈🏽
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16 years and 8 months ago...
#germy.art#this is my actual cat :)#he passed away a few days ago :(#but I'm doing well all things considered so dont worry about me :)#just trying to remember his legacy as the loudest sweetest boy in town#he got to meet so many people and steal so many hearts#im so proud of him and i miss him a lot already#he was a little orange ball of love and joy#and im better off for having had him in my life
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My 3 little cousins were baptized today. "Triggered" is kind of a strong word but being in a catholic church again... I'm a little fragile rn ngl.
#butch speaks#it was hard not to shake as i held J over the basin to have the water poured on his head#when he was cleansed of sin. as if a little kid could ever knowly or intentionally offend a so-called loving god#the words came naturally to me#but they meant nothing#i remember when they used to mean something. when i begged gods forgiveness for my sin (being a lesbian) and tried to pray the gay away#i remember how much i wanted to die bc i could never truly embrace the sacred#i STILL deal with the complex of catholic guilt. its a very real thing. its hard to shake#i cant help but wonder if the catholicism ingrained in my brain is why i have a hard time with casual dating n sex#fun fact: there was a point when i was a teen that i got REALLY catholic#i prayed everyday. i talked to my patrin saint (st agnes) every day. i wantsd to become a nun#the thought of marrying a man mad me more sad than feeling like an alien did. so id marry the church as a nun.#not the way to hide being a dyke when ur fam is catholic btw LMAO#the first priest i knew was father joe. i loved that guy. he was so kind. friendly. briming with love.#he was one of my biggest references for what a good person was like#he talked about gods love a lot. how its for everyone. no one is exluded. ever.#he used to look right at me when he said stuff like that. a few other kids too. all of whom grew up to be queer#then father joe passed away. our church merged with another church. father jeff was the priest there.#he was kind but not as kind. he talked about hell and sin more. he looked at the same kids father joe did.#but the kindness in his eyes wasnt there.#that wasnt for us.#my family wasnt even THAT catholic#i went to church every sunday i did vacation bible school and catechism classes and youth group#i was an altar servant and in the choir#i even used to speak/understand a little latin#imagine how much worse id have been if my mom could have afforded catholic school lmao#grateful to have grown up poor in that regard#hm. actually... reading my own tags. mayne we were pretty catholic actually.#fucking hell.#i need to have lesbian sex in a church before god and everyone. mayeb that would fix me.
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sawyer was sick over the weekend so we got some blood tests done and it turns out she is diabetic, she stayed at the vet a couple of nights, it was really strange to be alone in my room those nights. i spend more time with her than anybody. then we were supposed to pick her up thursday morning and they said to come in the evening instead because her glucose was v low. the vet asked me to find a glucose sensor to bring with me that evening, it was a public holiday so i had to find a pharmacy that was actually open. when we went to get her we waited 90 minutes and the sensor was being weird so they said come back later. finally brought her back home at 11pm and the sensor still wasn't working, had to go buy another sensor and bring her back this morning to switch them out, had to leave her there for a few hours so they could switch them and make sure the new one worked, then come back in the afternoon. i've had like no sleep at all this week, its a miracle i kept my eyes open to get training to give her insulin. she's so much better since she came home, even though she's not stabilised yet she very clearly feels heaps better ❤ it was such a relief to have her sleeping on my bed again last night. i was still up all night because i felt like i needed to keep an eye on her because i didn't have the monitor. we'll be in and out a lot over the next couple of weeks while they fine tune her dosage and monitor her levels.
#i want to know when i get a break#had planed to use this week to catch up on the prof development course i enrolled in months ago that started the day before nonna passed#i hoped it would be a chance to really apply my mind to something because i feel like my brain is utterly degenerated#after the time i took off this week for this i won't be able to do any of it before it closes i'll just have to download the modules#and read them in my own time without doing any activities/participating in discussions#have to keep canceling my dental check up because things keep coming up#i've also spent the last few weeks trying to link my online tax account to my government services account but it says all my info is wrong#no matter what i give them#what do i need to do#my life updates are so miserable. i delete so many of the posts i start because they just depress me#i deleted two earlier this week#feel like i need to get something out so i keep coming back to try#i still haven't asked hr about whether we have that counselling service thing because i keep forgetting bc i always have so much to catch u#on#i'll try to remember to do it next week#tp
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holy shit for the first time in ten years i forgot nicks birthday
#and ironically it was my friends video talking about march that clued me in#like fuck march passed and i didn't even notice it.... feels weird. very. weird.#jrnlsht#yikes he turned 40 this year#oh that makes me feel old lmao that makes me feel so old#i thought i had everything figured out when i was 25...of the two of us i was the one with the stable job that i loved#making art all day... and then staying up till 4am making art with nick#and like sadly literally not euphemistically#although those after hours set painting sessions did include some making out#he was such a mess back then#now we've swapped im the mess and he's the one with the stable job he loves#funny how life works out#i remember his 30th vividly his sister bought him this ridiculous bunch of balloons#which of course he hated#and he was forcing a smile cause he was trying to play nice and act like his life wasnt a total mess#and i just sat there giggling at him in his sisters kitchen with the balloons cause i could tell he was faking it#anyway it was fine i made it up to him with a much better present later that evening when we were alone :P#i dont think either of us ever imagined being this old#i certainly didnt#i remember the last time i touched his face a few years ago#it was the first time i realized that - oh- i could love wrinkles#bald with lines around his smile... it was still his face :)#but forgetting is a good thing#sometimes i need to let memories go and move on
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so.
#i just remembered todays a year since my uncle passed and like. its been A Day like its been A Few Weeks because its been A Few Months and#its been a few Years and so on.........and then i remembered that at like 9pm.#and i didnt like rmr his birthday bc i was so Worried about forgetting it that i Actually forgot and like.#ive been so focused on doing things w everyone in my family lately to like. Exist w them while i can#like esp going thru so much w my grandma and like helping my dad with her#and like. i think a lot about how my grandma has forgotten so much SOOO much already like its not like im talking to my Grandma anymore#anyways . thats another can of worms#but#anyway all that aside . i feel like . watching him go thru his whole life battling the same shit i do but like he fell so so deep#into his addiction bc his life had so much fucking trauma and like. he literally told my mom before he passed like a few weeks#before he entered a sudden fucking coma that he may have never had any luck w like finding love#(and bad luck isnt enough like his love life was a horror show GENUINELY LIKE#there would be a horror movie about it and itd be so fuckig BLEAK like its so bad) but hes always felt very loved#. so . at least i remembered ?#anyways . ill prolly delete this post later im just . Whoa dude! haha#using my blog as my journal as always dont mind me
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always so funny when im watching American Entertainment Media and there's a mention of a veteran or an army person or something like they'll go "he's in the navy!" and i'll be like "oh word! kick him harder!" but then they're being extra nice and it always takes me a full minute to rewind my thoughts and manually erase the "(derogatory)" connotation attached to these words
#im watching the good wife and#it happened a few times these last few days#i dont remember the exact episode but#the other day#there was a scene where someone mentioned something like that in passing like oh yeah she's a veteran#it wasnt even relevant to the plot but#within the appropriate american cultural context it was clearly supposed to read as#admiring#or even like. obsequious idk#a positive connotation in any case#but i of course overlooked it completely and the mood of the subsequent scenes just Did Not Make Any Cents#literally had to rewind to investigate#and then i noticed the vet thing#and it all fell into place#anyway#hashed tag cross cultural communication#lmao#&
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I should be happy I got new job but I feel depressed instead. Because it seems I'm doomed to work in shitty jobs forever
#i slept almost all day#i couldn't even enjoy playing 3lden ring today#heh#everything seems so pointless to me#tbh it's not only about the job#I remembered and realized a few things and now I can't really deal with it#i hope in few days it will pass
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