#the way i was absolutely cackling while making this post

[edward-munson]

ice cream | E.M.

Summary: It's present day, there's smartphones, social media and Spotify. You and Eddie discover you hold feelings for each other, in a very different way. He likes to show you intimate things he sees on his Twitter and you decide to try it out. (A/N: You'll know why it's called ice cream hehe)

Warnings: SMUT! 18+ MDNI, masturbation, protected sex (p in v), mentions of slight kink

Word count: 3.8k

'*•.¸♡ ♡¸.•*'

You usually invite Eddie over before going out. It's like a ritual you've been doing over the years, and you both have a few beers as a warm-up too. Sometimes you get more excited and tend to make some drinks for yourself. Sometimes you get him to do it with you.

He's sitting in the easychair on the corner of your bedroom, scrolling through his phone as he listens to his playlist on Spotify. You're finally getting ready after taking a shower and getting dressed first before doing your makeup. Eddie doesn't bother to look at you when you're only in your lingerie, he doesn't care because he's respectful. And that's absolutely charming to you.

He shows you memes and reels in his Instagram and gets you distracted since you're both a little tipsy from the alcohol. He gets on Twitter and snorts when he sees a page that posts different sex positions every day. Sometimes, they're too awkward and maybe a little too much for him.

He's the kind of a missionary guy but he also likes to bend someone over and hit from the back. Which is something he normally doesn't do much, but it's one of his favorite things to do.

You two have never done anything, although you have a great connection and sometimes it makes people think you're together. They always think you're hooking up or going out. Even your friends think that too. It's unbelievably sweet when you're together, because he treats you well. He likes to take care of you, but not like in an older brother way.

As your best friend, Robin tells you that you should invest in this relationship, but you wouldn't wanna ruin it. You know he wouldn't ruin it, but it's been so good that way. It's hard to actually take a step further.

And then when you ask him what he just saw, he turns his phone at you and shows you the picture. "Position 187: Ice Cream" You read out loud.

The image shows a man sitting on his knees, while a woman sits on top of him, her back on his chest, her hands on his thighs as he holds her breasts with both hands. You sure have never tried that before, though. And it shows Eddie hasn't either.

"It's a cute name, isn't it?" He asks as he continues to scroll on his phone.

While you pick a fine dress to put on, you look over your shoulder and laugh. "I don't get why it's called that, but whatever suits them"

You fix the straps of the light blue dress over your shoulder and suddenly you hear Eddie clearing his throat behind you. For a second, you thought it was his dirty imagination picturing himself doing that with someone, so you don't mind him.

But when you turn on your heel to pick your makeup case, you see him looking you over from the corner of his eyes.

"Eddie, sweetheart" You call him out and he looks up at you. Puppy brown eyes trying to play dumb.

"Yes, sweetheart?"

"You having a good time checking me out?" You muse, making fun of the way he was focused on looking at your curves.

Eddie widens his eyes and tries to pretend he didn't do anything. He waves you off and looks back at his phone, again, pretending he didn't do anything. But this time, the screen is off and you can't help but cackle.

"You scroll your phone with the screen turned off?"

He tries to laugh at it, but it comes off as a nervous laugh. He didn't think he was being indiscreet like that. Eddie looks up at you and bites his lips.

"Fine, I was. But, it's your fault! Look at you all gorgeous wearing that dress" He heaves dramatically.

You pick up his phone off his hand and place it over your nightstand. You don't know where you got that extra confidence, the crazy idea you just had in your mind, but you used it in your favor, sitting down on his lap.

Eddie looks at you funny, a weird expression over his face when he sees you sitting on his thigh. You wrap your arms around his neck and bring your lips close to his ear.

"Do you wanna try ice cream with me? While I wear this dress?" You ask in a whisper, fanning his skin.

Eddie holds your waist carefully, but there's a small electricity travelling through his bloodstream as you stay this close to him. He knew he was a goner for you a while ago, he just didn't want to admit it. He didn't think he would have a chance with you anyway. He just never tried. Steve and Jonathan told him you guys were a match long before, but he didn't listen.

He swallowed a lump in his throat, not feeling like he was able to speak. There's a rush in his head for a few seconds, because he feels his underwear getting too small for his ingrown bulge. You use his reaction as leverage and plant sweet and wet kisses over his neck, feeling the way his skin was shivering.

You trailed his scruffy beard, enjoying how the small hairs tickled your skin. In the background, a song by Black Sabbath filled the air that was becoming dense from the tension. He used his left hand that was free and placed it tenderly on your thigh, his fingertips grazing your skin. His fingers were just a few inches far from your groin, your own body reacting to his touch.

"I– I would love to, sweetie. But you don't think it's wrong?" He asks, holding back the urge to throw you over your bed and bend you.

You shake your head as a response, trying to make him comfortable and confident. You slide one hand down his chest, his t-shirt covering him. It's a shame he doesn't like to wear buttoned shirts, because otherwise you would've ripped it off by now. His lips are forming a thin line, like he's trying to absorb the idea, because he really wants it.

You already feel his hard cock touching the side of your leg and it makes you want him even more. Eddie doesn't want to just fuck you, because you're not just someone else to him. He wants to give you pleasure, he wants to give you a good time. He wants you to feel good and not used.

He wraps one hand around your neck, like he just figured out you liked being held that way and pulled you against him. He kisses you hurriedly for a few seconds, before clashing his tongue against yours. He tastes the beer you had, it's kind of bitter and sweet at the same time. He breathes through his mouth and forces his eyes shut.

You pull the collar of his clothing while you pull back the hair from the nape of his neck. It's a fervent and sweet kiss, you both play with your tongues as you deepen it, feeling him move a little under you.

It takes a lot of you to break the kiss, but the urgency of having him inside of you was growing uncontrollably and he felt it too. You got up from his lap and pulled his hand until you were both standing on the foot of your bed.

The hem of your dress went up a few inches and Eddie glanced at your ass for a small fraction of time. He wanted to touch it, grab it, squeeze it and even bite it if it was possible.

"How do you want it, Eds?" He felt his heartbeat quicken as he heard his nickname rolling off your tongue sweetly.

He immediately unbuckled his belt and unzipped his jeans, getting rid of it, feeling a small relief. You grazed his bulge in your small hand and gave it a little squeeze, making Eddie grab your face and kiss you again. It wasn't even romantic, it was desperate and lustful. You stroked him through his underwear and he buckled his hip forward in response.

"Turn around, sweetie" He asked in a rushed, husky tone and you obeyed.

You faced your bed, your knees touching the end of it. He carefully placed a hand on the small of your back and bent you over, making you lean against the mattress. You heard him groan, before giving your ass a light squeeze with both hands. He didn't even bother taking off his rings.

"Such a pretty ass, fucking God" He praised you, his voice a little deep.

He spread kisses all over your skin before surprising you with a slap on one cheek. It wasn't hard and it didn't hurt, which surprised you. You immediately felt your stomach sink as you started to feel turned on. Eddie slapped the other cheek and praised it, kissing it back. His hand was soft but you could feel his calloused fingertips stroking your skin gently.

He went straight to your bedside table and grabbed a condom. He wanted to do it right, and he knew what you kept in there because he saw it once. It wasn’t intentional but it came in handy.

He pulled his shirt off and wrapped his cock, jerking off slightly taking a step back to have a better look at you. Eddie couldn't believe he was actually doing it with you. He dreamed of this countless times but he never told anyone, not even Steve.

He kept his hand around his length firmly and stared at your ass, your cunt glistening from your arousal.

He stepped forward again before he pulled your underwear to the side. You felt your pussy throbbing for him already, you were soaking for him and you whimpered as you felt his fingers collecting your wetness.

His fingers weren't like you imagined, he softly stroked your slit and used two fingers to massage your clit, your legs started to buckle immediately and you had to prop yourself before you dropped your weight on the bed. He drew circles around you, his other hand was planted on your ass.

You mewled and had to bite your lower lip when he pushed his thumb inside of your pussy. It was enough for you to feel the roughness of his skin and how thick it actually is. Eddie pushed it further and felt your walls contracting from his touch, keeping a slow pace as he moved it back and forth.

"Oh my God, Eddie" You moaned his name and his cock jumped up to the sound of your voice.

He slapped you again with his other hand, fucking you with his fingers, stroking your clit as his thumb touched your inside mercilessly. You started to ride his fingers, gripping the sheet tightly as you felt the pleasure rising up in your body.

He couldn't help but take in the sight of you, drunk on his touches and whimpering his name. He bit his lip from groaning because he didn't want to look miserable, when in fact, he was already feeling too lost in his own thoughts.

"You look so hot from up here, sweetie" He rasped, his heart was racing and he felt his own legs trembling.

You didn't want him to stop, but at the same time, you wanted to ride him, to feel him balls deep inside of you. His fingers were fast but gentle and it was making you feel dizzy. His thumb was pressing against your most sensitive spot, giving you that blissful feeling.

You look over your shoulder, watching him shirtless, his necklace hanging over his chest and his dick hard rock almost touching your ass. Your throat left a sexual whimper that made him glance up at your eyes. Eddie licked his lip and hissed when he grabbed your ass and squeezed it.

You were exchanging a satisfying and lustful look, one that didn't make it uncomfortable to deal with. It was a knowing look, to be exact. His brain was barely functioning and when he pressed his forefinger against your clit, you didn't hold back the moan that left your mouth. He pulled his fingers back from you, they were wet and dripping over his hand.

You were still looking at him when you saw the way he didn't hesitate to taste you as he licked his fingers, pulling them inside his mouth, savoring your cunt. It was audible how he hummed in the back of his throat, closing his eyes and sucking his fingers.

You were still leaning on your knees, your cunt clenching at the sight of him doing it in front of you. You would never imagine this would happen. You would never actually imagine Eddie would be one to do such a thing, but it's just because you've never actually had an intimate relationship, not like that though.

He opened his eyes and dropped his hand, now looking deep in your eyes and he walks towards you and holds your ass with both hands.

"I'm gonna go slow, okay?" He asks, but you're in such a haze you barely understand what he's saying, just nodding.

Eddie holds his cock and pushes the tip into your pussy, the small entrance making his body rigid. It doesn't hurt for you, but it's a little bit uncomfortable because he's slightly thick. He slowly gets inside of you, and you contract your pussy around him so fast, he stopped breathing for a second.

His eyes closed forcefully, his hands gripped your ass tightly. As he felt the base of his shaft hitting you, he pulled back slowly and repeated his move. He started to thrust against you, feeling your cunt too tight against his cock. His senses were too heightened at this point, his hips pushing forward hitting your ass.

You couldn't stop heaving, crying lustfully and whimpering his name. His waist was slapping against you and the sound of his dick hitting your walls was making you moan louder.

"Fuck, Eddie. That's so good" You mewl and he thrusts harder against you in response.

"You're taking me so good, sweetie. So fucking good" He doesn't hide the way he wants to groan and vocalize his reactions and you loved it.

He slid his hand against your skin until he reached for your arms, pulling you up so you would lean your back against his chest. As the position changes, you feel him deeply inside of you. You can't express how much it makes your body shiver. He gently wraps his hand around your neck, squeezing it rather aggressively but still cautiously. He uses his other arm to hold your waist as he pounds on you.

He rests his chin against your shoulder, his breath hitting your ear. If he wasn't holding you, you would probably just turn into a puddle right in front of him. His cock fits in and you can feel his balls slapping against your skin as well.

You're both a mess of moans and grunts, the sound of the two of you mixing with the music of his playlist that was long forgotten. You're holding his forearm for support, your eyes closed as you concentrate on your pleasure.

Eddie is behind you, praising you next to your ear, fucking you senseless. His thrusts are becoming faster and you don't think you've ever felt this good before.

"You like that, huh?" He chuckles and his breath reaches your ear. His rough voice is echoing inside your head. You don't respond, you're too high. "You like me fucking you, sweetie?"

He suddenly stops pounding on you, filling your pussy with his cock until you feel the tip on your cervix. He reaches one of your breasts and grips it tightly. His other hand that's still resting on your neck, he squeezes it harder, enough for you to choke. Enough for you to still breathe. He knows how to manage it. It makes you feel more turned on for him.

You just nod, you're almost losing your senses. He kisses the curve of your neck, leaving a pepper kiss on it. He can almost taste the salty sweat of it. "You know what? I love it too"

He didn't give you time to recover, surprising you as he thrusted hardly against you, just once. "I love the way you taste, you're so sweet". One more thrust. "You look so gorgeous on your knees for me". Another one.

"Eddie, please" You plead, your voice almost faltering as you're still holding him. "Just keep going".

He likes to be dominant, but he also likes to be the bottom sometimes. But tonight, he wants to show you what he can do. It's not like he needs to prove anything to you, but he wants to make sure you have a good time with him. He wants to have all of it, he wants to enjoy it as much as he can.

"We're doing Ice Cream, remember?" He slowly asks, softly dropping his hand off your neck.

He gets on the mattress, sitting on his knees and he tries to adjust you on top of him, just like he saw in the picture. You position yourself on top of him, your knees up. You sink down and Eddie throws his head back, not expecting the sensation to be so overwhelming.

This time, you're doing most of the work. You ride him, your ass slapping against his thighs. Again, he wraps his hand around your neck and chokes you without much intensity. His other hand grips your hardened nipple and he tries to thrust up against you.

He knows his legs are going to hurt later, but he can handle the pain because it's worth it.

You throw your arm back and wrap it around his shoulders, holding him so you can easily ride him. The air started to feel damp, your bodies starting to sweat and stick to each other.

"You're so beautiful" He surprises you with a compliment and your cheeks flush. "So good to me. I wish I could've had asked you out before"

You don't know how to answer this. You're in pure bliss. Your head starts spinning and you're almost losing control of your body. He drops his hand lower until he reaches for your clit, but you stop him. You want to feel it all. You want to cum without that little help. He respects it and gets back to squeezing your breast firmly, pinching your nipple.

You're both in sync, him pounding on you, you sitting on him, balls deep. Eddie doesn't want to let go of you, but he knows he's going to cum soon. He kisses all over your skin, he savors your salty skin, he hums against it. He feels his stomach tying to a knot and he knows he's getting closer. But he wants you to go first.

"Cum for me, lovely. I want you to drench my cock" His words make you stagnant and you feel your legs squirming.

You start to roll your hips, squeezing his cock so hard he grips you harder entirely. You throw your head back as you feel yourself clenching around him, your hips stutter and your legs start shaking. He holds you closer and waits for you to come down from your high. Eddie feels your pussy throbbing against him, clenching around his dick tighter, swallowing him.

He feels your juices dripping down his cock as you tremble under his touch, you're almost convulsing. "Eddie, this is s'good" You mumble as you slowly start coming back to your senses.

He's not choking you anymore, he's not manhandling you, he's just holding you dearly for a few seconds before he starts stuttering as well.

His cock sputters cum all over inside of you, pulsing incessantly as he moans loudly against your ear. His arms squeeze you a little tight, his thighs contracting from both pleasure and tiredness. He rests his forehead on top of your shoulder, spreading lazy kisses against your skin. He stays a little longer, waiting for the buzz to slow down.

"This was so good sweetheart, you were perfect" He praises, dropping his arms down, gently lifting you up so he would pull out of you.

It's painful to leave from inside of you and he misses the feeling already. His dick still hard after a long orgasm. You don't have the energy to actually move, so you just sit there as you wait for him to throw out the condom. He puts on his underwear, crawling into your bed and sitting close to you.

He places his hand over your cheek that's still flushed and burning from the sweat. He licks his lower lip and smiles embarrassedly. "I think it's safe to say we've kinda ruined your dress".

You laugh kindly at his remark and nod. There is no way you're going to wear this to go out. And if anything, you probably need a shower. But before you get up, he pushes you closer and lays you down on your bed. He leans against his hand, his elbow resting on top of your pillow.

"Let's just take a breath for a moment, sweetie"

You agree, you just know it's going to be hard to walk now. Your legs are still shaking and they might as well feel like jell-o too. "You can still ask me out if you want, you know".

It catches him off guard when you say it. You've been wanting to go out with him for so long, it's only fair you two do it now. He smiles inwardly, looking down for a moment before he looks up at you again. He strokes your arm tenderly, going for your cheek again.

He's always been affectionate towards you, this time you think it's different and you feel butterflies fluttering around your stomach.

"I will, don't worry"

You stay like that for a few minutes, just trying to rest and relax before you decide to finally take a shower. He throws his t-shirt over his head, looking for his jeans and his socks. He doesn't even remember when he got rid of them in the first place.

You keep staring at him as he gets dressed. He has a few spare clothes in your closet, you know that. "You're not taking a shower after?"

He shakes his head, finally zipping up his pants, putting his sneakers on. "Nah, I'm a hard-rocker. We don't take showers".

Eddie shoots you the most generous smile and you can't help but giggle. You pick another dress and go to the bathroom while he just waits for you. The first thing he does is to text Steve and tell him what he just did. Not in detail, but he does. He can't rip the giant smile off his face.

This, thanks to the tweets he sees and shows you.

During the entire time you're with your friends at the karaoke bar, he can't stop looking at you. He can't stop thinking about the sex and how you trembled under him. He also can't believe he gave you one of the best orgasms you've ever had in your life.

"It's never too late, man" Steve approaches his friend, tapping on his shoulder. Eddie looks at him and nods, staring back at you.

[iracundiias]

[libraryofgage]

Steddie brainrot continues to worsen to a concerning degree but here's a crack idea that is absolutely sending me:

Famous Spicy Six in which Jonathon is a director who decides to work on a passion project: a Scooby-Doo movie. His ideal cast is as follows:

Nancy Wheeler (investigative journalist with a few special appearances on crime dramas) as Daphne Blake

Argyle (an actor with a habit of playing small parts; he acts only because he thinks it's fun, so he's not concerned with significant roles) as Shaggy Rogers

Robin Buckley (a well-known voice actor who is more well-known for her social media posts and clap-backs) as Velma Dinkley

Steve Harrington (basketball star who is also more well-known for his social media clap-backs and for being Corroded Coffin's number one fan) as Fred Jones

Eddie Munson (frontman for Corroded Coffin, an insanely popular metal/punk/rock band and "infamous" for unashamedly posting Steve Harrington thirst tweets) as the voice of Scooby-Doo

Corroded Coffin is also creating an entirely new, original soundtrack for the movie

And because I think it's funnier this way, this is also an AU where the Upside Down still happened, so Jonathon just calls his friends up and is like "Okay, so hear me out"

The absolute insanity that breaks out when both the movie and cast are announced because nobody can figure out how Jonathon managed to convince all these powerhouses to join his movie.

The further screaming online after one of the movie promo interviews where a reporter asks how they all agreed to the movie and Nancy hits them with, "Well, Jonathon asked, and he never asks for anything."

Which leads to the discovery that they all knew each other in high school, and the reporter jokingly asks if that means they've all dated each other, too, which leads to Eddie jumping in with absolute delight like, "Well, that's a funny story, there. See, Stevie here dated Nancy, who then dated Jonathon when they broke up, who then dated Argyle after they broke up. And I thought Stevie and Robin were dating, so I was very confused when I saw Robin and Nancy kissing. But then I found out that Robin was a true-blue lesbian, which meant Stevie here was open for the taking, and we've been banging ever since."

and Steve is just sitting there, head in his hands while Robin cackles and decides to tell the reporter all about Steve's "fuck I have a crush on Eddie" crisis

This interview, of course, leads to even more freaking out online and comments like "I know I asked for poly Scooby gang, but this is ridiculous," and "I can't believe that in this, the year of our lord 20xx, ScoobyXFreddy became a canon ship," and "if I had a nickel for every romantic relationship the Scooby gang actors have had with each other, I'd have five nickels, which is way more than any of us fucking expected to have," and "suddenly Eddie Munson's thirst tweets make a lot more sense, but can we talk about Steve Harrington's CC tweets now," and "everyone say thank you to Eddie Munson for revealing that mess of a relationship map," and "finally, the canon lesbian velma and daphne we deserve"

The movie is a box office hit, btw, and bloopers from filming roll with the credits, among which is Eddie Munson making Steve Harrington lose his shit laughing on set while dressed in a Scooby Doo onesie and singing Corroded Coffin songs with his Scooby Voice

[felibrary]

╭──╯GOOD DAYS | even as the snow falls atop his hair and the colorful fireworks launch in the distance, sylus can't help but keep his eyes off of you.

pairing: sylus x reader (gender neutral) | content & warnings: just some toothrotting fluff, bit of banter and bicker, reader is implied to be shorter than sylus, possibly ooc sylus | wordcount: 1.1k ; ficlet

author's note: this is based off his nightplume card with my own little add-ons lolll (also i don't even play lad anymore..so if you see any mischaracterizations here..yeah..)

A/N: Loll finally posted again and it's lad haha, enjoy!!

"sylus, i'm cold."

your boyfriend raises his brow and sighs, having the audacity to act disappointed. "i've warned you about the cold weather. should've listened to me about wearing a scarf," he smirks while you on the other hand only huff, frown deepening.

"well, i didn't know it'd be this cold," you shudder as the snowflakes meet your nape and slowly dissolve.

you're pretty sure you look absolutely ridiculous right now — with a runny nose and a hoarse voice complaining about something you're at fault for, to sylus who simply enjoys watching your dilemma and chuckles in amusement.

there aren’t often moments when sylus feels at ease, always on the lookout if something happens to you when he isn’t around. but he knows that if he stays by your side there won’t ever be something bad happening to you — he makes sure of that and instead decides to enjoy these simple but meaningful moments with you.

so maybe these little moments make him pay less attention to his surroundings than usual, oblivious to the snow that gets stuck in his hair and you can’t help but cackle a bit. “what?” he asks curiously. “there’s snow in your hair,” you point out. sylus’ gaze drifts up for a split-second before smiling and lowering his head. “help me,” his voice is soft as he requests you to help him.

even through hands covered in mittens, you can feel how soft sylus’ hair is, you play with his hair for a bit, rubbing your hand over his head before finally brushing the remaining snow out. “be careful, even a crow can turn into a dove in this weather,” you smile. “a crow? what a funny thing of you to say,” sylus returns your smile before turning his head away from you to look at the fireworks and so do you.

the fireworks are pretty, magnificent even. they vary in size, motive, and color but despite all of that each of them is unique and beautiful in its own way, making it unable to rip your eyes off them..besides maybe one exception.

not even a moment later, the exception in question turns to you, expectant ruby eyes staring down at you before swaying his gaze down to the snow-covered railing, smiling. "want me to draw you?" the turned-up collar of his stuffed leather jacket rises and falls along his neck as he exhales.

you follow his gaze and scoff. "sylus, what are you up to," you mutter under your breath. he doesn't respond, instead his gloved hand meets the metal railing before slowly tracing circles in the snow, and soon after you're able to recognize what he drew — a cat.

“seriously? a cat? i thought i’d at least be something more intimidating like a tiger,” you complain in faux offense. sylus only hums “do you know what you look like right now?” he doesn’t wait for you to respond before tracing lines onto the cat’s forehead.

"like a tiger that meows when it opens its mouth," he says, voice laced with sarcasm. upon seeing it, you can't help but crack a smile. "you're so stupid," you express with a shake of your head. "says the stubborn one who refused to dress warmly," he huffs before turning away from you again.

those ruby eyes full of danger and a lust for adventure soften upon seeing the shower of fireworks being cast in the sky. a mixture of bright red and blue colors paints the sky and casts a light shadow over sylus’ figure. 

you playfully roll your eyes at him, grinning as you scoop some of the snow off the railing. “sylus, you still have snow in your hair, want me to get it out for you?” you offer, a sweet smile gracing your lips. “what, you want to deepen our relationship? but if you insist,” he smirks before lowering his head.

you reach forward and unlike sylus’ expectation your hand lands on his cheek, making his eyes widen in surprise while you bite your bottom lip, suppressing the giggle you’ve been meaning to let out ever since you got the idea. sylus shoots you a boyish smile before flicking his fingers against your forehead which catches you off guard. “unprompted benevolence wasn't out of the kindness of your heart,”

before you’re able to process what’s happening, sylus pulls you into a tight embrace, strong arms snaking around your waist and holding you closely to his chest. "sylus let me go, i can't see the fireworks" you muffle into his jacket. "mhm, but weren't you the one who was complaining about the cold just now?” he says absentmindedly and you gaze up at him as he turns his head to the fireworks. 

his eyes find yours again, ruby eyes locking with yours as he gives you a mirthful smile. i'd rather not let you be exposed to the cold again" you glare at him which seems to amuse him even more because his next move is to pull you closer than before. (which you didn’t even know was possible from how close the two of you were already.)

luckily he lets you go soon after and you breathe in relief and observe him curiously as he pulls something out of the pocket of his jacket — a scarf. you gasp in surprise. “you had a scarf with you all along?” you ask him dumbfoundedly, not sure whether to be grateful for having something to warm your neck which isn’t sylus’ biceps, or if you should feel betrayed that he hid it from you.

“i’ve had a hunch that you’d forget yours in the rush, always so forgetful.” he smiles softly before wrapping the scarf around your neck, twice around your neck, and once around your.. eyes? “sylus, i swear to god.” even with your eyes covered beneath the wool scarf you can practically see sylus smirking to himself. “fine, fine,” he mutters, smiling before removing the scarf from your eyes.

the scarf sits nicely around your neck and not to mention it’s very comfortable and keeps you warm. you exchange glances with sylus before turning your attention to the fireworks again. 

from beneath you, on the riverbank, a bunch of people are lighting up their fireworks before watching after them as they fly into the distance. your eyes follow the fireworks as they light up the night sky and their reflections shimmer on the surface of the river. “the fireworks are so pretty, aren’t they?” you turn to sylus, expecting him to watch the fireworks too, instead you find his ruby eyes fixated on yours. 

“yeah, they really are.”

TAGS: @azullumi we're just gonna ignore the fact that this is dedicated to you and your birthday you oldie gramps of a geezer which was one week ago.....but anyway although i don't want to repeat what i said in my birthday letter (which you haven't read yet LOL) i want to tell you that in such a short period of time you've grown to a person I've learned to love so easily as if it were naturally - which it is. you're so loveable that it makes me wonder how anyone could ever hold a grudge towards you? you're the sweetest soul on earth and i wish i would've been there for your birthday to congratulate you in person but well beggars can't be choosers. azul, you're my soulmate and i appreciate everything about you and everything that you've done for me. i love how clear and easy our communication is, i love our little playful banters that other people find questionable and i love that people associate the two of us together, even when it means mistaking us for one another, which just proves how close we even appear to other people. you're the embodiment of lovely and loveable to me. i love you to death azul and once again happy birthday! <3

© FELIBRARY 2024. stealing, copying, translating, reposting my works on other platforms or feeding them to ai is not permitted.

[redr0sewrites]

Cuddling with Touya is a must during the winter. He's soo warm

-B3an

🎀A/n: bean. ily. this made me giggle and cackle like a FREAK hes so silly ☹️

🎀Cw: none, just fluff !!!

you are so sosososoos sooooo right !!! Touya is genuinely so cozy to cuddle with, for a multitude of reasons. i headcanon that his hands and limbs are always really cold, but his chest is really warm, so the best way to warm up is to snuggle close. he also loves putting his cold hands under your shirt to warm them up, and just ends up pressing himself as close to you as possible

because of this, he's pretty clingy !! even when he isn't intending to, Touya always ends up gravitating towards you in search of both body heat and comfort. he's definitely very touch starved and is unused to gentle affection, so it takes him a while to let his guard down. probably very much against touching you early on in any sort of relationship with you, but overtime becomes more inclined to touch as he trusts you more

i wouldnt say he's self conscious per se, but he's definitely aware that his rough scars and piercings may make him a bit uncomfortable to hold. even if he swears it doesn't bother him, please reassure him that you don't mind :( it definitely eases some of his apprehension about touching you

i also think he's simply not used to non-violent physical touch as a concept. Touya grew up with Endeavor as a father, and i just don't think he received enough affection in his childhood or adulthood to be comfortable with it, so it definitely takes some time to adjust. obviously this transfers over into cuddling, so he has a hard time asking to cuddle at first. he will probably just act indifferent about it but in reality he desperately wants you to ask him to cuddle so he can say yes,,,

Touya is one of those people who will say that they're cold, and then physically be warm if that makes sense. like he could be shivering and whining about how he's literally freezing.... but then you touch him and he's burning up!!! as we know from his childhood, his body supports freezing temperatures, and so he's better at handling being cold than warm, but it still pisses him off because he's CONSTANTLY cold !!!!

likes when you play with his hair, it makes him really sleepy

also ??? expect him to absolutely melt if you kiss his scars or praise him when he's feeling vulnerable enough to cuddle. there aren't many times where you can see behind his facade, at least at first, but this is the quickest way to do so. as previously mentioned, he's horrendously starved for affection, and really enjoys your praise

no matter your size, Touya prefers having you lay on top of him. it both allows you to rest against his chest and for him to hold you close, which is optimal for both of you, especially at first when he's still getting the feel of physical touch. it allows him to be in control and feel secure, while also giving you the affection you need as well.

another pro of getting to lay on his chest is listening to his heart beat. especially if its post war Touya, he knows that listening to his heartbeat and knowing that he's still alive and still here is reassuring to you. this also helps him as he gets nightmares or night terrors a lot, and just listening to your breathing and knowing your safe and staying with him helps calm him down.

this is another personal headcanon, but i think once he trusts you enough, Touya would secretly prefer to be the little spoon rather than the big spoon. he really wants to be held, and like i said, likes when you play with his hair, but most of all... neck kisses. he adores them. you press a sweet little kiss to the back of his neck while cuddling?? boom he's yours forever

he does enjoy holding you though, and i feel like he'd tap your body or rub little messages into your skin subconsciously. maybe i'm just projecting my own neurodivergent stims onto him, but i truly think he's also neurodivergent in some way and would be super touchy in the sense that he'd tap out little patterns on your skin, rub his name onto you as he holds you, stuff like that. most of the time he doesn't even realize, he just needs something to do with his hands. definitely rubs your hand with his thumb while holding hands too,,,

huge fan of pda- Touya wants everyone to know that your together. when your cold in public, he literally just slides a hand under your shirt or skirt or anything he can reach, and warms you up with his quirk. to onlookers it looks more risqué then it actually is, but that's the best part in his eyes

Touya isnt a very deep sleeper, he has nightmares and night terrors a lot and overall it takes him a while to fall asleep. when it's chilly out this is especially amplified as he CANNOT sleep when its cold, so he loves sleeping and cuddling with you because A) it warms him up and B) it soothes his anxieties

overall, Touya both loves and hates when your cold. he hates it because he can't stand when your uncomfortable,,, but also loves it because it means he gets to cuddle with you !!!

"why are you so far away?" you grumble, reaching out in search of your lover. Touya lets out a disgruntled whine as an arm snakes around his waist, pulling him up against your body. his tension involuntarily melts as you brush away the small hairs at the base of his neck, before pressing a small kiss to the now exposed skin and watching his ears redden.

"you're so cold... s'too cold. must've pulled away in my sleep. 'sorry babe." he mumbles, and you let out a giggle at his sleepy tone.

"s'ok Touya. y'know, i have to get up soon.."

he immediately perks up, squirming in your grasp until he's facing you, before wrapping is arms around your waist and burying his head in your hair.

"no. it's too cold to even go out."

"Touyaa!"

"stay here. we have to make up for lost time, since i didn't get to lay with you as much.. besides, missing one day of work/school isn't that bad, right?" a scarred hand creeps under your sleep shirt to caress your chilled skin.

"besides," he murmurs, pressing a kiss to your temple as he speaks, "you deserve the rest."

☹️

maybe this is ooc but idc i love him sooo much AND im picturing postwar!Touya so,,,, shh. pls send in more Touya asks. hes so silly.

[starrystevie]

rating: mature; 18+ only | cross posted on ao3 here

"truth or dare?"

steve's looking at eddie expectantly while he waits for his answer, his eyes wide and cheeks pushed up from the grin pulling at his lips. he's shirtless from past dares and eddie's trying hard to not look at the hair covering his chest, to not look at the way his scars have faded into a pretty dusty pink, to not look at the flexed muscles in his arm from where it's slung over the back of the couch and he's definitely not looking at the way the movement pulls his pec up.

they aren't high enough for this, not drunk enough for it either, but he feels intoxicated. maybe that's just what being around steve harrington at 2am does to him. it makes him stupid.

"...truth?"

steve's grin grows wide enough to challenge even the cheshire cat and eddie knows that truth was the wrong choice. see? stupid.

the hand on the back of the couch tightens and eddie can feel the way it pulls the cushion under his back, the fabric creasing against his shoulder blade. steve's leaning in a tiny bit closer, same wild grin on his face, and eddie feels himself stop breathing. he tries to remain calm, tries to keep an even expression on his face, but when steve harrington is in his presence, it's harder than it seems.

"okay... truth," steve's close enough that eddie can see the specks of green in his eyes and he tries to focus on that instead of how he can almost feel breaths that aren't his own on his lips.

"what's your biggest turn on?"

whatever breath eddie attempts to suck in gets stuck in his throat and turns into a cough forcing steve to pull away cackling. he isn't in eddie's face anymore but he can still feel him, can still sense the barely there exhale on his face, can still only see steve green behind his eyelids.

"what the fuck, dude?!" is all he can get out. his palms are sweaty so he rubs them furiously over his jeans, scowling at his fingers when they get stuck in the small rips.

steve is laughing at the other end of the couch but his arm is still settled over the back of it, creating the most delicious tension on his chest. he looks broad like this, broader than eddie's really ever seen him. and with his hand across the couch and his legs opened just slightly and his bare chest on display and his bright white teeth glinting in the dim moonlight he looks-

he's hot.

he looks like the old steve, all cock-sure and suave, like he knows he can get absolutely whatever he wants. it does eddie's head in. is he what steve wants? is he why steve looks like he could jump on anything and everything that came his way? is he why steve thought he could ask him about his turn ons as easy as if he was asking about the weather?

"i don't have-"

"oh bullshit," steve says with a flick of his free hand. "everyone has one, man. what gets you all hot and bothered?"

eddie tilts his head up with a scoff. "why do you want to know?"

"consider it your average every day bonding." he says it like it's obvious, like all guys do when they sit around and play sleepover games like they're kids again is talk about what they like in bed.

but eddie's drunk on steve in 2am moonlight and can't help himself for giving him everything.

"i like dirty talk."

he'd always give steve everything.

steve's grin shifts into something borderline feral that has eddie vibrating under his skin. he moves his hips and settles back into the arm of the couch, leveling eddie with his gaze. his eyes are heavy when they look at him and eddie feels glued to the spot.

"oh yeah?" steve's inflection sounds exactly like what eddie craves for and he's afraid that he's shown all his cards already if steve was able to pick up on it that fast. "like what?"

he rolls his eyes if only so that he can take them away from watching steve's muscles contorting as he shifts on the couch. it's not hard to get eddie in the mood, that's the embarrassing thing. his limited experience before he learned about alternate dimensions and things living under hawkins didn't exactly help his case. he didn't exactly have guys throwing themselves at him as a social pariah covered in still healing scars, either.

so steve looking at him with those eyes and that grin and without a shirt for god's sake? not helpful.

"i don't know, i just-" his mind supplies images that gets his cock stirring. a certain king of hawkins under him or on top of him or right behind him whispering things in his ear that he had never really thought about before.

"-i just like hearing the effect i have on them, i guess."

and then without warning steve is moving. he's up on his hands and knees and is leaning into eddie's personal space again, his face close enough to eddie's that he can see that damn green in his eyes again.

there's still a bit of space between then but not nearly enough that eddie isn't effected by it. steve's pinkie is brushing his thigh and his cock that was already interested just thinking about the sounds steve could make is stirring even more awake under his gaze.

"you like hearing you're doing good?" steve questions. eddie sighs. "you like all the moans and stuff?"

all eddie can do is nod, afraid that if he speaks that he'll do something embarrassing like say he wants to pull whatever sound out of steve that he'd let him. suddenly, steve's pulling away minutely to get his mouth close to eddie's ear, breath coming out in puffs against his skin.

"oh fuck," steve huffs out, voice pitched high and dainty. feminine. "oh, oh eddie, it's so good."

eddie grips his hands onto his knees like they're the only thing keeping here on planet earth as steve moans in his ear. his cock is starting to grow, whatever blood that was left in his head heading south fast and it's leaving him dizzy. from up close, he's sure steve can see what he's doing if he was to look down. he's wearing sweatpants that don't exactly hide anything, after all.

the sounds steve are making are all light and pretty like he's going off of his own experience and eddie has the fleeting thought that it's what girls sound like under him. that some girl has been pressing up close to steve's chest and had her pretty pink lips up close to his ear as he fucked her into the mattress. but oh, if eddie had the courage he'd tell him. tell him that he doesn't want to hear some girl, some stranger.

he wants to hear steve.

"you gonna take care of that?" steve's voice is back to somewhat normal, a bit raspy and deep, and it floods through eddie's veins like molten lava. he doesn't remember closing his eyes but he peels them open and turns his head to look at steve. he follows his gaze and sees that they're both looking at how turned on eddie is. he doesn't have enough blood left in his cheeks to blush but he would if he could.

"steve, that's wei-"

a hand wrapping over his knee stops him mid sentence. "not weird. do it. i want you to."

eddie gulps even though his throat feels drier than it's ever been. steve's fingers tighten and he jerks his chin up to urge him on and fuck, he knew he'd always give steve whatever he wanted.

"can you just," eddie sucks a breath in through his teeth as he drops his hand to his waistband, fingers teasing under the fabric. "sound like you, please?"

the silence feels palpable. he can feel every place that his clothes are touching him, every place that steve is touching him, every place his breath has fallen on him that evening. he has half a mind to take it back and tell him he was joking, to pretend like he's some girl again and eddie could get off on that, too. he could at least try, especially if it was steve.

but then- "eddie, fuck."

steve's mouth is close to his ear again, lips ghosting over the shell of his ear as he groans into it. his voice is pitched deep but it's definitely undeniably steve. he shifts onto his knees so he can drape his arm behind eddie once more. not touching, but there and as eddie's hand slips under the fabric to grip at his cock, they both let out a sigh.

"yeah, there you go. gonna touch yourself for me, hmm?"

"shit," eddie groans out as his hand trails over his weeping cock. he brings his thumb up to gather a bit of the precome that's dribbled out of the top and rubs it between his fingers before gliding them down his length. steve's panting these little sounds into his ear that mirror eddie's own moans. when he sighs, steve sighs, when he whines, steve whines.

it's like he's touching himself to get steve off, too, and isn't that something to think about? them laying side by side with each other's dicks in their hands, stroking just how the other likes to get them off. he'd watch steve's face, speed up when his eyes open and slow down when he's close. he'd buck his hips into steve's steady grip, swallow the moans he pulls out of him so they echo through his body. it'd be heaven on a mattress or hardwood floor or ratty couch in a ratty trailer.

"got me all hard in my jeans, eddie." steve breathes out and eddie can't see is he's lying or not but it sounds true and eddie briefly wonders if steve should go into porn with those acting skills. "the way you look with your hand in your pants, jesus, it's a sin. all flushed and hot and, god-"

if steve keeps it up, eddie is going to be done way faster than he wants to be. his hand speeds up when steve lets out a particularly loud moan in his ear and then there's a brush of denim against his arm and wow, steve was in fact not lying. his hips keep jumping up to get pressure against eddie's forearm and the long line of steve's cock is teasing him.

"steve," he whines out, "are you..."

"of course i am," he laughs against eddie's ear before sneaking a tiny kiss to his temple. "you're so fucking hot, dude. been wanting to do this for too long. too long, oh my god."

his hand that was on eddie thigh moves up to unbutton his pants and slides under his own waistband and eddie takes a moment to slow his strokes as he looks up at steve. he looks like a greek god in grungy trailer lighting, chest shimmering with sweat and puffing with heavy breaths. he's grinning down at eddie and he feels like he could float away.

"think i'm hot, stevie?" he says on a shuddering breath as he hits a spot on his cock that he immediately goes to find again. steve smirks before his eyes roll back as he gets a hand on his own dick.

"so hot, so fucking-"

he's cut off by a moan and eddie sends up a silent thank you to the universe that they have the trailer to themselves for the next few days because eddie needs to pull more of those out of him. he needs steve on his back and on his cock and in his mouth and on his fingers and every which way he'll let him have him if it means he gets to hear more of that.

"gonna get my mouth on you soon enough, gotta know what you taste like. gonna get you down my fucking throat..."

steve's brought his mouth back down to eddie's ear and is grunting like he's running the race of a lifetime while he tells eddie what he wants to do him. says truths of his own outside of the now forgotten game, secrets laced with some of the most romantic things eddie's ever been told. tells him how pretty he is, how good he is, how he's imagining eddie's fingers on his cock and on his skin and how he's close, close, close.

knowing he's effecting steve this much, knowing he has this hold on him that he thought was one sided, knowing that he's racing through steve's veins like he's racing through eddie's, it's too much.

"i'm... fuck- i'm gonna," eddie's hand speeds up and the hand on the back of the couch comes up to tangle in his hair. there's a pressure pulling him back until he's looking at the ceiling for a second until all he can see is steve and the flecks of green he's come to love.

"it's okay, i've got you, come on. let me just-"

their first kiss is shared on a ratty couch in a ratty trailer with their hands in their pants and come covering their fingers. eddie's mouth is open enough that he's moaning into steve's and the hand on the back of his head is twitching while he comes. they pull apart enough that eddie can hear what they sound like as they work through their orgasms together, can hear what steve sounds like as he works himself down.

he's going to get that on a record someday, he tells himself. it'll go platinum.

and just as quick as it started, it's over. only this time steve's snuggling up next to him and using his clean hand to stroke over the exposed skin on eddie's stomach instead of returning to the opposite end of the couch. their chests are heaving as they try and regain their composure and it feels like bliss until steve laughs.

it's like an ice bucket being poured over him and he wishes he didn't love hearing steve so much because he's afraid that the laugh will haunt his memories for ages to come. steve must feel him freeze up because the hand on his stomach circles around his waist and pulls him even closer so he can nuzzle his face into eddie's chest. it starts to settle the nerves that had wound themselves around his insides.

"i don't know if you could tell," he starts, voice muffled against eddie's flannel. "but i've been wanting to do that, this, for ages."

eddie snorts. "you've wanted to make me jizz in my pants for ages? really? low standards even for you."

steve snorts out a laugh in return. "no, you idiot. i've wanted to be able to do this for ages."

he tilts his head up and places a featherlight kiss to eddie's lips. it's soft, it's sweet, it's the opposite of everything that happened not two minutes prior. eddie feels a smile tugging at his mouth and pulls back to see steve smiling, too.

"does this mean..."

there's no words, no definition that eddie can put to the events of the night that don't sound silly or juvenile. but then he sees steve settle back down, pressing a kiss to right over his heart before laying his head down where it was.

"... that we're doing that again? absolutely. just maybe in a bed next time."

and maybe they don't need a label. maybe all they need is laying on a couch with come cooling in their pants and echoes of what just happened bouncing off the trailer walls. maybe all they need is a promise of later sealed with a kiss and their heartbeats in synch.

and maybe, just maybe, they'll play truth or dare again.

[stormblessed95]

Watching Are You Sure?! EP 1

A reminder of how I do these reaction posts as I watch things. I just write my reactions and thoughts down literally as a happen. Think more of a bullet point format. I'll include links when I can to videos, thanks to the people who twt who upload clips. And at the end, I'll do a better wrap up of all my opinions. I hope everyone enjoyed the show so far!!

The episode starts with Jimin showing up right before JKs GMA performance and interview, July 14th 2023.

Them meeting up and talking about how he has his performance in NY on GMA later. Jimin saying that he hadn't seen him in a while, their schedules kept them SO BUSY 😭😭 this trip was so good for them. And the way he caressed JKs throat and told him to rest his voice and take care of it since it had been hurting. 🥺 So many soft touches too as soon as they were able to see each other again. And we didn't even get to see their actual reunion.

JK packing up his hotel room and talking about how he never traveled so freely before. They are so sweet and so busy and I'm so glad they were able to carve out even just a few weekends for time to themselves. And the way when the staff was talking to them about plans and who would drive etc, JK said he would drive and was just sitting there talking about traffic while they were holding hands interlocked resting in Jimins lap 😭 that's so??!!

Then fighting over the AC in the car in efforts to take care of the other is so cute. Jimin wanting to make sure JKs throat stayed okay, JK not wanting Jimin to get sick. They baby the heck out of each other. And Jimin watching his GMA performance on his phone 🥰 JKs cute smile while Jimin was jamming out to his music 🥺

"JungJi" new ship name alert?! Lmao!

JK ordering for the table 💜

The absolute bickering over who is a bad driver/bad at parking. The get out. Lmao the way they absolutely irritate each other on purpose is amazing and soooo best friends/might as well be married behavior 😂🤣

When they went shopping together and JK said they should buy the same shorts together 😍🥰 matchy matchy always!!

And an ARMY recognized them and saying hello and they were so cutely excited about it. "We've still got it." 😍🥺🥰

JK ordering for them again at the brewery 🥰 and I love that they went to an LGBTQ friendly brewery for one of their first hang out spots. Some ARMYs went and talked to the people working and said they everyone said Jikook were super polite, no one had recognized them and they kept to themselves a bit and just had some phones/go pros for recording.

The way that they also started talking about how this was their trip before military service. And how JK started bonking Jimin over the head with his camera when he mentioned it. Jimin was giggling but you KNOW that they was emotional from it too. This was when they were thinking there was still a chance they would be separated for 2 years. I know they were anxious to get to cherish this time spent together. I know it meant SO much to them both and probably so much to JK that Jimin traveled all this way and made it happen.

The way that JKs kayak tipped over immediately and Jimin just was cackling as he continued to paddle away and the staff were fishing JK out of the lake 🤣🤣🤣 just for JK to furiously row up on him and be like "you have your phone?? Tip over!!" 🤣🤣 They are so funny and cute! And Jimin taking a photo of his baby 💜 the way Jimin spent the whole time on the water just laughing and smiling fondly at everything JK would do. It's so freaking sweet. They just really had so much fun together being silly and goofy.

Not Jimin giving JK the "you come here often?" Pick up line and the immediate roleplay they both get into 😅🤣😂 they really can't go too long without at least a little bit of flirting lol

We know there was a getaway cabin with a 2 bed option but Jikook picked the one with just one bed. Lmfao good for them. Hey BH, we know you have no issues with filming the members while they sleep, even while they share the bed. How come we got zero footage of Jikook sharing the bed? 😂😂

Jimin being like "JK, you are a good cook 🥺" and Jungkook just immediately getting to work on cooking them dinner 🥺💜 although when Jimin asked for a taste, why did JK feed him from his FINGER?! Lmfao and what the hell was the noise he made when Jimin licked his finger 😂🤣 half moan, half laugh? I don't even know lmao

And the way he ran to go feed Jimin a piece of the chicken because he was proud of how his cooking was turning out. Sooo cute. Jimin accidentally dropped a piece of chicken and acted like he committed a great offence 😭😂 the way they spilt dinner duties though was so cutely domestic.

JK speaking directly to the camera to speak to the viewers. Man has done too many hours long live streams. Lmao he is too used to just chatting with ARMYs 🤣😂 that was adorable and Jimin thought so too. And the way Jimin goes "I miss V" and JK immediately is like "let's call him!" Anything to make Jimin smile! But they clearly cut so much of that convo, BH, give me my members loving each other istg I miss them too much. And don't even get me started on the yoonminkook conversation. I genuinely almost teared up. I miss BTS so much 😭 their laughter is healing

Jimin getting a stomach bug 😭😭 my poor baby. And the screen just going black while Jikook cuddle?? The give us minimal Audio and a black screen and then they cut away entirely and we KNOW they are cuddling. Lmfao TF BH!! We know they cuddle, where is my fanservice?! And JK turned over at some point and elbowed Jimin in the nose. You KNOW they were all up in each other's business on that bed for that to happen 😂😂😂

And my poor Jimmie... He feels so bad 😭😭 JK is taking such sweet care of him though.

JK outside stacking rocks while Jimin rests is giving me Yumi vibes. Lmfao I love him (and her!) SO MUCH! The way he prayed after too for a good trip with Jimin. The rock tower is also (correct me here if needed) a way to pray for someone's health and well-being. My poor sick Jiminie. Yumi also used the rock towers as ways to pray and communicate with her Gods.

Wrap up thoughts?

Not much I haven't already said honestly. Lol but just more emphasis on how special this trip is, both to Jikook themselves and for us to have it shared with us. This IS comfort TV. They bring each other such peace and happiness. They both banter and tease and have such fun. They both baby the heck out of the other. JK taking care of a sick Jimin was soooo nice seeing. The way Jimin wasn't feeling good, but rallied in order to have a good time for their weekend away.

It's also interesting that so much of this is honestly filmed from GoPro. They have some staff and crew there, but from what I've seen it's a smaller number than normally goes to film these shows and they are left alone with just installed cameras fairly often. That's extra nice for them. 💜

I am and forever will be salty about all the cuts. The Tae face time was cut short, the cuddling was cut, so much was cut. Which duh, I get why. But I still want more 😂 looking forward to the behinds to see if we get anything more. That black screen cut from them cuddling though was 👀👀😂😂

JK was such a good leader and took charge so much so far this trip. It was cool to see, Jimin ALSO thought so! The way he was speak for both of them, drove them around, ordered food and drinks for them, gave dinner prep instructions. Gave Jimin his medicine.... I'm not saying it's hyung behavior.... But... Lol also I did notice that there was a pretty even split of address between him calling Jimin hyung, or just by his name. Along with all the little random bits of flirting sprinkled through the episode lol so cute..

Hope you guys enjoyed it!! And thanks for reading all my random thoughts! Onto episode 2!

[qu1cks1lversb1tch]

Sinstagram | L. Morningstar

Warnings: Lucifer being a slight menace to society, Reader is also a fallen angel, fem reader, bestie Angel Dust, mother reader, older sister Charlie, kinda wholesome, Lucifer being a good dad and an amazing husband, semi suggestive(?)

Word Count: 1.1K

A/N — sorry if it's kinda all over the place, I've been stuck in a horrendous bout of writers block and just barely had the motivation to sit down and write for Lucifer, my love 😭

"No fuckin way!" Angel Dust cackled from two rooms over and immediately you heard his footsteps coming towards you. It could be one of two things — Val posted something weird as fuck or he uncovered pictures of the two of you absolutely plastered from three months ago.

"What's up?" You asked, looking away from the paperwork Charlie had you doing for the hotel, while she took her younger siblings out. Some of the stuff she didn't understand, even with the help of Vaggie or Alastor, so you stepped in to help as you were a manager at a hotel when you were sent to earth for work — it was a way to blend in that unironically gave you experience.

Angel stopped before you, a smirk falling upon his face filled with glee and suggestive glances. "You check your phone in the last few minutes?"

Confused, you shook your head 'no' and set down the small stack of papers that had been stapled together so you could view them with ease. "I've been working for the last few hours to make up for being gone with Lucifer all weekend, so it's on silent. . . Angel, what's going on?"

He leaned across the counter and turned his phones screen to face you. It was Lucifer's most recent Sinstagram post. For a moment, you were confused until your eyes scanned the caption.

'She calls me apple the way I be in cider 😏🍎'

Immediately, you blushed and covered your blazing cheeks with your hands. "Oh my." You breathed out. That blush immediately became a flush of mortification when Angel clicked on the picture and it showed that he had tagged you. Your Sinstagram username stared back at you.

"So, you and the short king got down and dirty on your weekend retreat, huh?" Angel Dust smirked, turning his phone back to himself to scroll through the comments that were rolling in by the second.

"Well," you began, unsure of where your words were going to go. "I am his wife. . . It's a natural thing that married and apparently unmarried people do. . . Yes, it's only natural."

Angel snorted. "You ain't gonna hear any complainin' from me, [Y/N/N]. . . So long as there ain't anymore little Lucifer's running around anytime soon."

"About that. . ." You trailed off.

Angel Dust opened his mouth to reply.

As if on cue, the front doors of the hotel opened, Charlie and Vaggie entered, each holding one of your children — the former exorcist angel holding your sleeping daughter. She had your hair but Lucifer's eyes and rosy cheeks.

Your son was wide awake, bearing a striking resemblance to his father and older sister, but with your eyes.

It was clear just by the way he was buzzing that they had gone to LuLu World. He was always energetic coming home from such an exciting trip, whereas your daughter was out cold halfway through the ride back home every time without fail. It was likely a sugar crash.

"Looks like someone had fun." You removed your hands from your face and stood from your seat, rounding the desk.

"We all did. . . Thanks for letting us take them out, [Y/N]. I wish you and dad could've come with us and made it a family day." Charlie smiled brightly at you.

"We will soon, I promise. . . Thank you for taking them while I got some work in."

"It's no problem! I love them — they're just the cutest."

Your son practically jumped out of his sister's arms when you got close enough for him to wrap his arms around your neck. He went on and on about all the fun stuff the four of them had while you finished up working, until he fell asleep mid sentence.

You chuckled lightly and asked Angel to bring your daughter out to the limousine that was waiting out front of the hotel. He arrived a few minutes later and your daughter acted as if she was beginning to wake up, until she was strapped into her car seat and the driver started the vehicle.

"One more Morningstar, huh?" Angel questioned before you could close the door behind you.

You smiled, chuckling slightly. "Just one more. He convinced me this time."

A couple minutes later you were on your way, watching the buildings fly past your window. You decided to check your phone finally. The post had over a million likes and had just over six thousand comments. You liked the post, the blush creeping up once again. At some point you had to stop caring — you were in Hell and there were people doing worse things than being romantically involved with their partners.

It wasn't long before three of you arrived home and Lucifer threw the front door open before the vehicle could even stop. When the driver opened the door, Lucifer was there to see his children after a long day.

"Look at my babies!" He gushed quietly, tears springing to his eyes as he watched them sleep so peacefully.

You snickered and he turned to you.

"And my beautiful wife! Hi! I love you so much!" He kissed all over your face while placing one of his hands on your belly — you weren't showing yet, but would be in the next few weeks.

"I love you too, Luci. . . Let's get them inside. I want them to be in bed before you and I have a talk about what we do and don't say on Sinstagram when we'll be apart for hours." You whispered the last sentence, caressing his cheek.

His eyes widened and he gulped before chuckling nervously.  "You saw that, did you?"

"I sure did. . . Apple." You could've sworn he was gonna pass out from the tone of your voice, but he instead cleared his throat and unbuckled one child while you handled the other.

The two of you got inside and put the kids to bed, silently thanking Charlie for making sure they ate something other than sugar before they came home.

Then there was a lot of talking. Definitely just talking. . . Yeah. . . Talking. 👀

A few hours later, the two of you laid together, Lucifer laying his head on your lower abdomen. "I know I said one more. . . But what if we had more?"

You laughed lightly, raking your fingers through his hair. "How many more are we talking, Luci? I'd consider one more after this, but then we wouldn't have an even number. . . Charlie adores her siblings, but I think another after our littlest Morningstar would be pushing it."

"She always wanted a big family. . . Lots of brothers and sisters she could spend time with. She used to beg Lilith and I all the time for siblings, but I won't push you. I understand your concerns. I'll be happy regardless of what you decide." Lucifer declared, looking up at you with his pretty eyes.

"We'll see. . . I love you, Lucifer. You know that, right?"

"I know. I love you so so so so so so much." He replied. 

The post in question and the image that gave me the idea for this in the first place (the first pic expands more, fyi 🙂):

[hihhasotherfixations]

Imagine after that first flight with baby dragon, whenever Price or the 141 toss dragonling in the air a lil to get them to laugh, there's little wing flaps of them tryna copy their dad. Also little tail wags and wing flaps when they're happy

PLS YES

Link to original post

Little drabble below the cut 👇

“There’s the little tyke!” Soap cheered as you came walking in while holding Price’s hand, your hair ruffled. Upon seeing the Scot, you squealed a giggle and let go of your dad’s hand, wobbling a run over to him as he crouched down with a little laugh, his arms out for you.

The moment you were close, he scooped you up and held you high.

“My wee flier!” He said before grinning at Price. The man looked a little tired, the carrier partially unstrapped and still hanging on his chest. “How’d they do?”

“Like a dream. Loved every second.” The dragon spoke proudly, walking forward as well.

Your little tail was waggling like crazy as you now sat on Soap’s hip.

“You’d expect they get tired from it.” Ghost remarked from the corner of the room, raising an eyebrow beneath his mask, seeing the absolute explosion of energy you still had.

“Ghof!” You yelled out the moment you heard him, making Soap grin as he turned and held you out for the centaur standing a little ways away.

Your little hands stretched out towards him, Ghost sighed before walking over, his hooves clacking against the wooden floor as he turned, allowing Soap to deposit you on his back.

“I want to be paid by the hour.” Ghost dryly spoke to Price, making the man chuckle as he watched you squirm and sit up on the centaur, your tiny fists tightly clenching his black coat.

“I’ll buy you a bourbon next time we go out.” He said before he finally started to unstrap the carrier from his chest.

Sighing in relief to have the tight straps loosened, he tried to lift it over his head, only for it to get stuck on his left wing.

With Soap on guard duty to make sure you didn’t fall off of Ghost’s back, he was left to just drop his hands in defeat. He’d get it off later.

“Need help, cap?”

“Garrick.” Price sighed in relief as the voice sounded behind him and hummed. “I think it twisted.”

“Yeah, it did.” The siren said, starting to untangle the straps. “First flight went well then?”

As a response, Price just pointed at you, your tail wagging like crazy, constantly whapping Ghost’s flank - who looked less than amused, though in a caring way.

Smiling, the younger man then helped lift the carrier off his captain.

“Come on, Ghost, let’s take a ride! The kid would love it.”

“And have your furry ass sit on me? No way.” Ghost scoffed, his torso turned to adres the other man.

“Don’t be rude now.” Soap pouted, lightly fist bumping the centaur’s hip to drive his point home. Yet in response, Ghost just lifted his back leg and whacked a hoof into his shin, making Soap groan and instantly crumple, cradling his leg while you cackled out a giggle, your wings beating a few times. “Ghost, what the s-“

“I hope you both aren’t teaching my kid violence or swear words.”

Both soldiers tensed a bit as Price’s voice boomed.

“No. I wasn’t gonna swear.” Soap quickly said while on the floor, seeing his captain cross his arms across the room.

Walking up, Gaz just whacked Soap upside the head, getting a playful swipe at his legs in return which he easily dodged before reaching Ghost.

“You two should never be allowed alone with children.” He said while lifting you off of Ghost’s back.

Immediately, you were entranced by the way the light reflected off of the iridescent scales on his cheeks. Like a true, hoarding dragon.

Ghost crossed his arms and Gaz just chuckled as he stole you away, walking over to sit on the couch in the common room, with you in his lap. “You just went on a flight with daddy, huh?” He asked.

In response you just happily babbled, reaching up to touch and tug at his cheeks.

“Whoah-“ Gaz pulled you back a bit, smiling as he then instead tilted his head to lessen the reflections. “You wanna fly?”

“Ah!” You immediately shouted, your attention span as short as your legs.

Happy, Gaz lifted you off his lap, bouncing you up and down between his legs for a second before heaving you up and throwing you into the air, a game you’d played a hundred and one times with the team.

Yet as Price stood to the side, a warm smile on his face, he watched you spread your wings and flap them.

Standing up a bit straighter, his surprise turned to glee as he watched the little limbs beat in the air, doing nothing to keep you afloat as you fell back down into Gaz’s arms with a shattering laugh.

Yet when Gaz threw you up again, you did it once more.

You’d learned from your dad.

He saw it in the way your right wing moved down a fraction earlier than your left. It was his flying technique.

With Ghost and Soap squabbeling in the background and the sight and sound of your laughter, today was going to be a hard day to ever be topped.

[writingoddess1125]

loving reading Buggy's saga with his children, but I confess that I felt sorry for his balls being crushed in the last post😭

please help our dear Buggy recover from this illness 🥹

Of course sweety! 🍭 we shall cure the Muggy Buggy Balls!

Fever pt. 1

Buggy x FemReader + Buggy Twins

Old Men Series Masterlist

Wanna buy me some cup noodles? 🍜

After what was deemed the Nutcracker Arc, Buggy had been down a bit- He had wanted to have more children with you eventually but after the doctor saw the damage from the wooden sword and apparently damage from a previous incident that Buggy still refused to tell you about- The doctor essentially said his nuts were done for.

"I wanted daughters so bad..." He groaned into the pillows, still in his pouting faze as you sat next to him rubbing his back. It had been 2 weeks since Dee had taken the wooden sword to poor Buggys balls.

"I know honey.." You say softly, trying to comfort the man. Truthfully you had seen the damage and had a fairly confident feeling he was done with any baby making- Buggy was knife proof but not blunt force trauma.

"Hey it won't be that bad Buggy, You have two beautiful sons who will carry your legacy and besides we are heading to the island for the rest of our '60 day' vacation" You say softly, at this point the 60 days were no better then a joke- it had already been well over a month on the ship and with Buggy, you two just used the '60 days' as a way to tease one another over how silly it was. And an excuse for a vacation.

Buggy looked up st you, his makeup smeared on his face and he sighed in defeat. Nodding in agreement at this point.

"Yeah Yeah- Two destructive boys with devil fruit powers on an island unsupervised, What can do wrong" He said as he leaned his head against you his arm wrapping around your waist.

"Why would they be unsupervised?" You question with a raised brow, Buggy looking at you with a crooked grin.

"Well we will be busy of course" He says in a flirtatious manner- You playfully shoving his face away while blushing making both of you laugh.

"Land Ho!" A loud voice sounded through the ship, Snapping both of you from your thoughts as you your giggles.

Buggy getting up and offering a hand to you with a smile.

"Ready?" He asked, you could t help but feel your heart flutter at this. Grabbing his gloved hand and nodding, heading upstairs you saw the coming shores of land.

"Look!" Dee yelled from the crows nest, that being were he preferred to stay it seemed- Bee jumping around on deck like the hyperactive child he was.

There was a lush island that was filled with beautiful forest and a small village nestled there. It didn't take long for you all to dock at the island- Buggy happily escorting you and the boys through it.

The island he had picked was absolutely lovely, it was like a strip of paradise tucked nearly in the corner of the East Blue, a small village on the north side of the island and on the southern side was were Buggy had claimed for himself. It seemed Buggy was well Acquainted with the place as well since the locals were familiar with the crew and held no real fear of Buggy either.

"Wow! It's so big!-" Bee cheered loudly at seeing the Island, Dee nodding in agreement as they looked at the village.

"Hehe that's what your mo-" "Medium" You deadpanned, immediately taking the wind from Buggy's sails as he pouted at you taking his joke away.

"Here" Buggy said reaching in his pockets, handing the twins some change and telling them to explore the island and giving them the key to the Inn room they were in.

"This island is you're to explore, Just don't be stupid and go into the water" He said with a grin, the Twins smiling in delight at this before rushing off with their new found freedom.

"Buggy are you sure?-" You question as you watched them run away cackling like little demons.

"This place is totally safe- Besides I'm sure they are just gonna raid the candy shop anyway" You couldn't disagree with his decision and nodded.

Buggy excitedly lead you to the inn you all would be staying in while the details to the cabin was set in. It was a small tradional inn and had a hot spring attached, truthfully you thought it was quite adorable but beautiful non the less. Taking a seat on the massive futon bed you smiled at your Partner.

"I gotta admit, you did a really good job Buggy" You say earning a wide smile from the Clown Pirate.

Buggy was clearly proud of his choices, the praises from you and boys definitely fanning his ego. Especially since you didn't disagree with him that this was a terrific spot or that the inn was quite beautiful.

"I'm going to check how long till the cabin is complete-" He said with a grin kissing your lips before leaving.

The boys were out exploring the island, Buggy was checking on the cabin. You had the room to yourself? Oh how the stars aligned- jumping up you quickly grab a bottle of wine and open the back sliding door to see the amazing hot spring in the back. This was heaven-

Buggy returned after an hour, having picked up some dinner for the two of you to try and have a date night in- He knew he was still new to the whole romance thing but he was trying, aka using books to figure out.

"Hey (Y/N) yhe Cabin will be completed in a few days" Buggy said calmly, walking into the room expected you there- But was met with silence, raising a brow he walked in the room fully and opened the back sliding door that lead to the private hotspring.

That's when his world froze- There you were standing in the hotspring, it looks like you were grabbing a cool rag for yourself and just bend in the perfect angle to see everything.

You turned quickly hearing the noise of the door opening and saw Buggy there with his eyes as wide as saucers and clearly very pleased to see you. Not even having to say anything you turn and face him fully.

When the house was finished you and your small family all moved in. Buggy talking about this would be a safe house for you and kids anytime after the '60 days' or if you wished to just move here and he would return regularly.

Blushing as you stood in the hot water, Buggy catching the look in your eyes starting to strip and sliding into the water after you. His eyes never leaving yours as he closed the space between you two in moments- his hands wrapping around your waist quickly as you two smiled at each other.

It seemed Buggy was right, you and him would be busy.

Truthfully it was pure domestic bliss.

And it was this way- For a little over a month till one morning. You woke up and everything just seemed terrible, The bed made your back hurt, the lights were too bright, the twins already up and too loud.

You heard Buggy trying to talk to you excitedly but his voice was muffled and difficult to understand. Truthfully you didn't even remember making it to the kitchen and making yourself a cup of tea-

It was like you blinked and you were there, the boys chattering loudly as Buggy tried to get them to sit the fuck down as well as telling you something you didn't understand. You felt a hand finally touch your head, seeing Buggy in a different shirt and the twins gone... how long had you dozed off for?

"You look flushed-" Buggy muttered, his eyebrows crunching up as he got way too close to your face. You didn't know why but his face seemed to irritate you, or was it the smell of the apple shampoo? Or possibly-

"BLECH!" You vomited, right on the front of Buggys shirt.

Buggy's face turned red, like he was going to yell but held back and took a breath. See how you had been out of it most of the morning and fairly unresponsive despite him asking repeatedly if you were okay.

"Let's get you to the doctors.."

He said finally, Sighing as he peeled off the shirt and helping you up.

It was a short trip to the doctor in the village, Buggy being too loud in demanding you be seen right away- You wanted to choke him..

In a few minutes the doctor arrived and gave you a routine check-up, You sitting their while Buggy talked some more about random stuff as the Doctor stood back with a surprised smile on his face.

"I see what's going on-" The doctor said with a smile, both you and Buggy staring at the doctor as he set his tools to the side.

"Congratulations! You're pregnant" He said with a joyous voice- you and Buggy freezing at this.

"W-What but- I thought I was done for!?" Buggy said first as he pointed to his pants- The doctor shrugging at this.

"Well it sees you still gad a chance, but a chance non the less- If you keep trying eventually something can take root" The doctor admitted calmly. You sitting thinking back to different moments in your life... mainly your labor with the twins... 36 hours for both.. the diapers and all that 'fun'.

"How far?.." You manage out, still feeling shell shocked at this news.

"Hm I'd say 5 weeks along give or take?-" the doctor said calmly as he tapped his chin.

You both looked at each other, the thoughts swirling in your guys head as it clicked. 5 weeks is when you guys arrived at the island and..

"The Inn Hotspring-"

You guys said in unison. Buggy staring at you in total shock like the puzzle peices were still formulating in his brain- before he broke out in a wide smile, started loudly cheering and jumping.

"YOURE PREGNANT HAHAHA!"

You sitting there in shock as your partner jumped around the room... did 60 days just turn into 9 dog damn months?

[miaoua3]

Hiiii!! How are you doing?? I hope you are doing great! I just wanted to ask if you can write about Seungkwan husband hcs? and I also wanted to say that I really love your account it is an absolute masterpiece, I always check everyday if you posted anything because I am excited to see what you wrote ❤️❤️✨️

(Sorry if my message isn't understandable English isn't my first language 😅)

hiii! omg FINALLY a request for our boo, i’ve been waiting for this day, of course i can do it, it would be an honour. and thank you so much for saying that, as well as loving my account so much, i love you all more😭❤️

(btw, your english is perfect, have more trust in yourself and your abilities🫶)

anyway, enjoy this!

Husband! Seungkwan Headcanons:

•(sfw! hcs):

proposed in such a romantic and…seungkwan way lmao just imagine-his members of course had to be a part of it, so they have been dragging you around the whole city the entire day, making sure that you look absolutely perfect for the showtime. seungcheol took you to get your nails done, before jeonghan stole you away from him to get your dress ready, and then joshua and jun were the ones to take you to get your makeup done and- you get the idea lol, but then, as you walked with hansol and chan up the stairs of the building that you and kwanie live in all the way up to the roof, you already started crying because you knew what’s coming. and you were right because once the door of the roof were opened, you see the love of your life standing at the end of the long red carpet, right in front of an altar made out of flowers in a shape of a heart. and because it’s boo seungkwan, of course he serenaded you the song you two were listening the night you two kissed for the very first time. the rest is history❤️

has his wedding ring constantly on him, be it in his ring finger or on a necklace around his neck-the ring is one part of an outfit that is not negotiable, he will wear it no matter what

constantly talks about you when he’s a guest on talk shows, he will find any way to make any story be about you, he could be asked about the thought process behind the song he cowrote with woozi and he will just be like “oh well it’s actually inspired by my wife! she’s always my inspiration behind anything i do and write- i remember distinctly, on that day i was just-“ everyone is low-key annoyed by it because…can he go on for two minutes without saying the words “my wife”? lol

so so so very affectionate- he will hug you all the time, doesn’t matter if there’s people around or if one of you is busy, if boo seungkwan wants to hug and kiss his wife, he will do as much, even when you’re washing the dishes or vacuuming or doing skincare- he will just sneak up on you and hug you from behind as he nuzzles his face in the curve of your neck, he fr sometimes remind you of a cat

is very big on jokes in your relationship, he will try to make you laugh as much as possible, that’s why you two have so many ongoing inside jokes, god forbid someone says one word that will remind you both of one of your jokes, you two will start cackling, leaning onto each other as you two try to control yourselves but with no avail (jeonghan is so sick of you two, he had been enduring this ever since you two started dating and seungkwan was still living with him)

his favourite nights are when you two get drunk on sweet sweet wine from italy and start jumping and dancing around the apartment, all while singing (read: screaming) the lyrics of your favourite songs together, naturally using your hairbrushes as your microphones. something about this makes seungkwan feel…like he will live on forever, if not in other people’s minds and he in books of records, then at least in your heart and memory❤️

because this is boo seungkwan we’re talking about of course, expect little harmless and useless fights (more like bickering) to happen at least twice a day, he sometimes does it because he genuinely doesn’t agree with you but sometimes he does it just to see you pout at him lol, from fighting about which sort of tomato tastes the best to who the best marvel character is, expect him to start shit at any topic you try to bring up lol

•(nsfw! hcs):

his words are always so sweet, they taste like honey both on your and his lips, but then his actions would be so dirty, a complete contrast from what he’s saying- he could be asking in that deep voice of his that he always pull on you in the bedroom “who is my good girl?” but in the same second he would be landing such a hard and nasty spank on your ass cheek that has you throwing your head back in pleasure- his words so affectionate and full of praise, but then his actions look as if it were a punishment, he dances on that thin line so well

prefers fucking you either in missionary or when you ride him, he loves seeing your face scrunch in pleasure as his dick is pounding into your heat, your muscles tightening around him-there’s just something in the way your eyebrows furrow and your mouth open on their own while he’s bringing you pleasure, plus it’s only a bonus that this way he gets to kiss you anytime he wants to (or a louder moan threatens to spill out of his mouth)

and his fingers? gosh his beautiful fingers…the only reason why he isn’t eating you as much as he would like to is because you prefer to have his fingers instead, so long and so pretty and perfect, curling inside of you just the right way, his little nails scraping against you sweet spot which brings you to your finish way before you’d like- and when he licks the very same pretty fingers clean and then wraps them around your pretty little neck? gone. gone and done for.

surprise surprise-boo seungkwan is a talker in the bedroom. shocker, i know. half of his honey sweet words won’t even register im your mind due to the pleasure, but he will still talk, going from kissing your neck and nibbling on your ear and talking, just like “fuck, your sweet pussy feels so good around my dick baby, you’re gonna make me so fast. would you like that, hm? does my sweet girl want my cum? want me to fill you to the brim? fuck, if you don’t stop clenching around me like that, i really will do it-“ KNDKABAPA BOO SEUNGKWAN

loves placing your legs on his shoulders and bending forward, it makes your pussy feel that much tighter, which then makes you both feel how good he’s stretching you, the burn making you moan even louder which makes him fuck you even harder and faster

isn’t a boob person per say, but he will leave so many hickeys on your chest, you will lowkey look like a mess lmao, they would be littered all over your soft tits, ranging from purple to blue and yellow in colour- i mean seriously, don’t even think about wearing something a little bit more revealing or people will ask if you got mauled by a bear lol (that night is something jeonghan will NEVER let you live down lol (seungkwan was low-key proud of his artwork though lol))

LOVES it when you grab him by the hair and redirect his mouth where you need him the most, the sting of the pull, the neediness that is displayed through your actions, the way he doesn’t even want to tease you or reject you- it all gets him feeling so hot and bothered, he will literally moan as you pull him by his hair from between your legs to your face so you can kiss him i- i need him SO BADDDD DJKWKXKSJAB

[crescenthistory]

in one of your posts you mentioned barty giving a best man speech at r and regulus’ wedding, it’d be nice to see your take on the full speech or like a wedding oneshot? love your work btw i adore how you characterise barty

are you taking emoji anons? id love ✂️

hey there babes<333 you can absolutely be ✂️ if you want to tell me your age and pronouns i’ll add you to the list 🫶 and thank you, i love and miss barty as well

unfortunately i don’t think i’d be the person to write a full length wedding fic 🥲 it’s just not my vibe. i might write blurbs referencing it, bring it up in fics (like with the fifth and sixth wheel series) or write out some funny dialogue i think i’d see, but beyond that weddings are so intricate and personal that i’d struggle getting it in a reader insert format

however, i present to you some random thoughts:

when i write reg x reader, i always imagine barty as trying to be both reader’s man of honour and reg’s best man lol

like he would CAMPAIGN to get to be both. and he’d likely win

i fear you’d have to share him and then have one more for each that’s just yours (for slytherin!reader i picture you have dorcas and he has evan or pandora) (potentially, reg has sirius and you have remus)

barty would by far be the most chaotic in the wedding party, but i believe he brings the kind of chaos those friend groups need to get through something as hectic as a wedding

he would have the “go, go, go!” attitude and the nerve to say “shut the fuck up” when needed

and you best believe that if anyone else cause drama, he’d be at their NECK. he threatens sirius from start to end of the wedding, even though he is on his best behaviour and super happy for his baby brother (fighting with him is just instinct for barty)

most of the black family were not invited and barty places evan at the door to ensure they do NOT try to sneak their way in. if they do, well then barty gets an opportunity to let out some steam

i can picture barty taking on an almost bridezilla persona as the best man to take some of the heat and stress off of you and reggie — he is the bad guy so you don’t have to

if you do end up having some kind of meltdown over the planning, his energy would switch up sooo fast and he would be the most caring, gentle creatures, cooing and cradling you while snapping at whoever’s closest to go get reggie

as for speeches, i think barty and sirius make the two “main” speeches, while dorcas makes a small toast and pandora recites a poem

i just knowwwww barty’s speech would have people so torn between cackling with laughter and tearing up — truly, they get whiplash, every other sentence is hilarious and heartwarming

(barty is seemingly none the wiser that people have to catch their breaths from the energy changes)

“i didn’t expect junior to make me so emotional”

he has known you and reg since first year, so he tells alllllllllllll the stories; the good, the bad, the pining and the embarrassing

i don’t want to talk about sirius’ speech because he’d definitely say he was incredibly proud of regulus and happy he has found love, and i cannot take that

it wouldn’t be the biggest wedding, just the people you truly considered family; it was perfect

[intimacyequalsdeath]

Bubz's Slasher Fictober Day 10 : (Peach Cobbler) Pumpkin Carving

Day 10! Another day with not much to say other then I hope you enjoy today's post! We are making such good progress on Fictober! Notes: Minors DNI, Canon typical anything to do with the character, movie or game.

Support Me: KO-FI

Slashers when their love wants to carve pumpkins...

Chop-Top Sawyer:

~Chop-Top would be all over it, So much so that the pumpkin would end up not even looking like a pumpkin when he gets done.

~He'd do everything from trying to light the pumpkin on fire to trying to convince Bubba to let him use his chainsaw.

~Would totally start a fight with you by throwing pumpkin guys at you. So if you don't like mess just stay away from pumpkins.

~The fight would eventually devolve into him just throwing pumpkin guts around the house. Chaos is his business and business is good.

~He'll start to go after Bubba with it, Don't let him. Make him leave poor Bubba alone.

~Would cackle at the TOP of his lungs when Drayton ultimately gets home, sees the mess and has an absolute nuclear meltdown.

Brahms Heelshire:

~Another slasher who would love it, but he would be the opposite of Chop-Top. Absolute perfectionist.

~Expect to sit and wait for him for literally hours. He needs to ensure every last cut is perfect.

~You have to clean out the pumpkin though. Brahms refuses to put his hands in pumpkin guts.

~Once he has it to his liking he honestly probably wouldn't let you put a candle in it, Doesn't want it ruined with wax or have it be burned.

~He doesn't want it ruined so much so that he doesn't even let you put it outside. He wants to take it back into the walls with him.

~He takes it back into the walls, and eventually when it rots you realize you might need to find him a way to have a pumpkin year round.

Charles Lee Ray (Human):

~He doesn't want to at first, like at all, if you're really inclined to carve pumpkins you're gonna have to work for it.

~One day after you've worn him down he'll come home (probably from another murder) with two pumpkins. His excuse would be that they were on sale.

~Even with the pumpkins he still won't be totally down to carve his. He will eventually, and he'll pretend the whole time he's not into it. But he's lowkey having the time of his life.

~Will meticulously clean up the mess afterwards while you go put the pumpkins out on the porch. He's the Hillside strangler, he knows how to clean up.

~The pumpkins will end up giving him some sort of semblance though.

~On the late nights when he's coming home from terrorizing the city, the soft glow coming from the pumpkins will remind him of what's waiting inside the house for him.

[ohbo-ohno]

happy new year's eve @luminousbeings-crudematter, here's another version of the purge au (4k) that i forgot i finished in the process of trying to get the first one done lol

(also when i said "it's essentially the same thing but with different smut" i meant... no smut. i didn't post this one bc i couldn't figure out what to do with the smut. but this has some kidnapping and overall rough creepiness!)

cw: noncon touching, kidnapping, graphic murder, blood & violence, unedited bc im lazy

The soles of your feet burn against the hot asphalt, even though the sun’s been set for hours. The flames roaring from the burning high school alongside you are enough to heat the ground, enough to leave you wincing with every step and trying your best to walk on your toes.

You’re not sure if the wetness on your cheeks is tears or blood, or some sick combination of both. You’d wipe it off to see, but your hands are covered in red, and you don’t want to smear it across your face.

It’s impossible not to flinch at the sudden sound of cackling laughter, some indeterminate distance away but clear as a bell. The laugh cuts off abruptly, followed by a high-pitched scream that makes you wince. You speed up as much as you can, breath shuddering in your chest. You feel a few tears slip down your cheeks, just adding to the tacky mixture already covering your face.

The street is crowded with Purgers, people wearing all sorts of different gear to make themselves seem as terrifying as possible. You’d feel lacking in your black pants and shirt, if you wanted any attention like them. Instead you pray that whoever’s looking for fun won’t focus on you, that you’ll disappear with so many other distractions out tonight.

The sound of a chainsaw revving makes you shudder, and you tuck your arms close to your chest. 

You can’t believe you were stupid enough to come out on Purge night, but there’s no use dwelling on that now, not when you’re still blocks away from home with absolutely no way to defend yourself.

You should’ve known your friend - your now very dead friend - didn’t have good intentions. She’d invited you out with her to vandalize your most recent ex’s house, and like an idiot you’d agreed and walked yourself right into a trap. Your only defense is that you’d had a few drinks before leaving your perfectly safe apartment, in hopes of forgetting all the screams you’d hear outside. It’s the only reason you can think that you were so quick to agree when you’ve got absolutely no way of defending yourself.

Her blood is still wet on your hands. You don’t feel bad about her death, and that makes you feel sick. You’d never thought you’d be the kind of person to actually partake in the Purge, let alone kill during it, but here you are - stumbling home covered in blood with two deaths on your hands. The fact that it was self-defense isn’t nearly as much of a comfort as you need to make your heart beat less erratically, to make the blood stop burning against your skin.

The quick flashes of their deaths won’t stop playing on repeat in your mind - you would’ve died if you’d been any less lucky, and you doubt your piece of shit ex would have made it quick. 

If you hadn’t caught them together - your friend fucking him in the bed you used to sleep in, that fucking bitch - you might not have had the anger necessary to kill them. Might not have had the rage, the energy, to stab them both until they stopped screaming.

Your arms already ache from the force you’d used. You can’t stop seeing your friend’s face, torn to shreds beneath you, blood splattering up onto your own face and neck while your ex’s corpse cooled beside you. You’re not sure if you’re hearing her screams still, or if someone nearby is suffering just like she had.

The only thing you can bring yourself to regret is leaving behind the knife. It would come in handy now, as you walk alone down one of the poorest neighborhoods in your city.

It would come in especially handy as a hand grabs your shoulder, yanking you to the side and into an alleyway, shoving you against rough bricks and ignoring your yelp.

“Well, well, look’it you…” the man drawls, his face hidden by a bright red skull and a black hood covering the rest of his head. “Wha’s a bonnie lass like you doin’ out tonight, all alone?”

You can’t speak, heart thudding painfully at your ribcage as you blink up at him. He’s all you can see, just a bright red skull floating in place.

“Please,” you manage to gasp, hands shakily raised in front of your chest.

“Please? Please what?” His words are sharp, almost bitten off, and he leans closer. “Haven’t even threatened ye yet, pretty thing. What’re you beggin’ for?”

You whimper as he leans closer, hardly inches away from your face, and a loud boom from somewhere nearby shakes the wall at your back. You still can’t tell if it’s blood or tears dripping down your face. You jump at the sound, and your chest hits his. Before you can move back, his hands are on your shoulders, keeping you pressed to him.

“Oh, did that scare you?” He coos, patronizing and mean. “You a little scaredy cat, all alone and afraid?”

You sob, hands pushing at his chest, and he makes a sound somewhere between a hum and a laugh, pushes you against the wall without pulling even an inch away.

“No, no, you’re not goin’ anywhere. ‘S not safe out there for you, kitty. It was so easy to grab you, you want someone else to get a hold of you? They won’t be as nice as me, I can tell you that.” 

“Get- get off!”

He laughs, loud and rough, right in your face. “Oh, I’ll be gettin’ off, kitty. Might take some teamwork, huh? A good way to get to know my new friend-”

He cuts himself off with a sharp Oh! as your knee jerks up into his crotch, the man doubling over in pain and groaning as his head comes to rest against the wall by your face. You barely have enough sense left in you to duck out of his way before his body goes limp against the wall, hand cupping your target.

“Fuckin’ bitch,” you hear him hiss, right before you stumble away, legs weak as you put all your energy into not tripping over your own feet. Your only thought is getting out of the alley, even though being more exposed is probably riskier than just taking your chances with the man in the red skull. Still, there’s some instinct at the back of your mind telling you go, run, and you’re not stupid enough to ignore it.

You hardly make it five steps away before you hit a wall - no, not a wall, a person. 

It’s almost comical, the way you bounce off of him and stumble backwards, losing your balance on weak knees and sending yourself straight to the ground. He’s a monolith above you, a massive figure clothed in all black, the light from the flames behind him almost making him glow. He’s all black cloth and white mask, a skull hovering well past six feet in the air.

The sight of him makes your heart stutter, brings everything into acute focus around you, slowing the world down to a near stop. That same instinct at the back of your mind tells you this man is worse than the last, that you should’ve taken your chances with the red skull. 

You’re jerked back and to the side, shoved roughly against the brick wall. Your face scrunches up at the rough texture against your cheek, your torso flush against the wall and the first man flush against your back. You manage to open one eye and track the new man, your other forced shut from the way your head is angled.

The white skull tilts, and its wearer steps closer. You can’t help the small cry you let out, the way you flinch back into the first man like he’ll do anything but expose you more. His hands are rough on you, one hand locked around the back of your neck and the other harsh on your hip.

The body behind you laughs, push further into the wall regardless of the stinging pain as the white skull steps closer. He stops hardly a foot away, when your vision is eclipsed by only him. You try to struggle against the hands holding you, whimpering when they dig in more harshly.

“You got her?” A voice asks, and it takes a minute for you to realize it’s the new man in front of you.

“Yeah,” the first man pants, holding you close and alleviating some of the pressure against your cheek. “Woulda caught her without you, y’know. She just caught me off guard.”

The white skull rumbles low in his chest, a rejection. You’re not sure if he’s got faith in your ability to escape, or doesn’t trust his partner’s ability to chase. He’s close enough that you can only see the black of his chest, close enough that you can watch him breathe.

“I’m sure. You got a good hold on her?”

The hands squeeze, you can’t help but make a sound disturbingly close to a squeal, and- “Yeah, course, got her tight to me, Ghost. She’s not goin’ anywhere.” There’s an air of desperation in Red’s voice, a strained tension underlying every word. He’s almost eager, but it’s all directed towards the man in front of you - Ghost - instead of towards the prospect of hurting you.

Ghost doesn’t respond, but he steps close enough to press his chest against your shoulder. The three of you are all less than a foot apart, and there’s absolutely nothing you can do to get away. Another tear slips down your cheek.

You can feel Red’s chest heaving behind you, and at first you can’t understand why - he hasn’t had to chase you, hasn’t had to fight, there’s no reason for him to be out of breath.

It hits you when you feel the hard plastic of his mask press into the top of your head. He’s eager, and it’s making him pant like a dog. You’d bet he’s drooling behind the mask and the thought makes you shiver.

You flinch when a gloved hand cups your chin, tugging your face up so you’re staring into the eye sockets of the mask.

His eyes are dark brown, so dark that you almost can’t see them past the shadows and the paint over his skin. The flames roar behind him, giving him a monstrous glow.

“Pretty thing,” he hums, chest rumbling against your side. You try to push away from him, but there’s nowhere to go. “You’re gonna be our little toy for the night. Things’ll get worse for you if you try to run. You hearin’ me?”

It’s pure instinct to nod, to give this man what he wants, but you know you’ll still try to run the second they look away. 

“Alright then. Let’s get you home. Johnny,” the man steps away, jerking his head in clear instruction for Johnny to follow and turning away. “Come.”

“Right behind ye,” Red - Johnny - assures, that same eagerness in his tone as he tugs you away from the wall, trotting behind his partner. “It’s gonna be a great night, lass. You and I are gonna have fun.”

You can’t help but whimper at that, letting your body go nearly limp as the man drags you by the elbow. You can’t even fathom the horrors they’ve got in store for you, what fun is to two men hunting for lone girls on Purge night. 

You try to let your feet drag, but they hurt too much for that to last long. You consider going limp, making them carry you, but you’re too scared that they’ll just drag you across the concrete and let you bleed. 

You only manage to keep up with Johnny because he doesn’t give you another choice. You’re practically hobbling from the pain in your feet, forced to walk on the balls of your feet and lean your weight into his hand where it’s wrapped tight around your arm. He doesn’t give you any slack, doesn’t even seem to notice when you struggle to match his pace.

The three of you have walked several blocks - you can’t quite focus enough to count - keeping to the sides of buildings and dodging other people, when you’re tackled to the ground out of nowhere.

It’s impossible to stop the blood-curdling shriek from leaving your throat. Your bare arms feel torn to shreds as you slide across the ground, head bouncing off the ground and leaving you with black spots dancing across your vision.

You’re hardly able to blink, body alight with pain, and the heavy weight over you only serves to make your panic worse. You moan as you roll your neck, staring wide-eyed up at the dark sky and praying the ringing in your ears isn’t permanent.

Your vision is just starting to clear when the man on top of you - and he’s definitely a man, he’s not even wearing a mask and his expression is mean and you find yourself glad you can’t hear what he’s saying - jerks back, his head pulled back until all you can see is his bared throat. 

You can hardly even register what’s happening in the next few seconds. Some distant, detached part of you can recognize that someone slits the man’s throat, that his blood comes gushing out and covers your face.

The first sound you can hear again is your own screaming - it’s an ear splitting sound that melts from the ringing in your ears. When you gasp underneath the man, the corpse, you can feel his blood falling into your mouth. Every breath tastes like iron, and the world is tinted pink from the drops of it falling from your brows.

You can do nothing but pant and shake when the corpse is thrown off of you, replaced immediately by Johnny. You can hardly focus on him, are only really aware enough to know he’s there.

“Hush, bonnie, yer fine,” he scolds, one big hand coming up to cover your mouth, pinky and ring finger holding your jaw shut. “Wanna draw people over? Ye wanna see me and Ghost kill someone else for you, ‘s that it?”

You shake your head on instinct, tears running down your temples, dampening your hair. Your chest aches with the force of your breaths, nose congested from all the crying. 

“Then hush,” he hisses, face so close that you can feel the breaths from his nostrils. You flinch at the loud sound of gunshots disturbingly nearby, desperately pushing against his body to try and see what’s going on. You can hear grunts and moans, the sound of something heavy hitting the ground, and your heart races.

Then, the sounds stop. It doesn’t go silent - not with other Purgers still out, still killing - but the area you’re trapped in is quiet again. Johnny drops a little more of his weight onto you, making it even harder to breathe. 

You have to focus on every breath, deliberately making sure you get enough air so that your lungs stop aching. You only notice the movement on top of you after nearly a minute of slow breathing.

Johnny’s hips grind slow and steady against your stomach, and it makes you sick to realize you can feel his erection through his pants. His chest rises and falls with harsh breaths, and his movements are just harsh enough to force your body to move with his.

There’s absolutely nothing you can do about it. Not with shock settling in, his weight holding you pinned to the ground, and the pain in your head shifting to something closer to a migraine. All you can do is focus on your breathing and stare up at the stars.

“Johnny,” Ghost eventually calls, and you can hear him kick what you can only assume to be a corpse out of the way. You can’t help but whimper when he crouches nearby, his boots splattered with blood. “What do you think you’re doing?”

“Need-” Johnny gasps, hips stuttering against you before working even more quickly. “Needed to feel her, fuck, Ghost, she’s so fuckin’ soft. Can’t wait to be inside, to fuck her full, feel her squeeze-”

You whine against the hand over your mouth, trying to pull your face away from his grip and only succeeding in dragging your sensitive head across the harsh concrete.

“You’re gonna fuck her out here, where anyone can see? Doubt you’ll be able to keep her safe when you’re pussydrunk.”

Johnny moans above you, dropping more of his weight on each thrust. “Tha’s why you’re here, yeah? To keep me and the lass safe?”

Ghost grunts, fisting a hand in the strip of hair left revealed by Johnny’s mask. “Don’t be a fuckin’ brat, Johnny. You know I don’t have to do shit for you - either of you. Maybe I want to see my mutt get all defensive, growlin’ over his girl. You ever think about that?”

The whine that slips from Johnny’s throat is nothing less than pathetic, his pace becoming uneven as his eyes screw shut behind the mask. “C’mon, Ghost, I’m close, just let me… just watch for another minute, yeah?”

The scoff from Ghost is mean, and even you feel the absurd desire to try and placate the man. He stands abruptly, stepping away from where you’re pinned and leaving you staring at the cooling corpse of a man you don’t recognize.

“You do whatever you want, puppy. Stay here and get yourself off or behave and heel. You know what you’ll get either way.”

You can’t help but furrow your eyebrows as Johnny hisses out shit above you, hips working desperately against you for a few long moments before he drops his entire body weight onto you, knocking the air out of you.

“Okay,” he whispers, seemingly to himself. “Okay, alright, it’s fine. It’s fine.”

He pulls himself away from you with a long oan, pushing up until there’s no place the two of you are touching but you’re still entirely caged in by him. He takes his hand off your mouth to hold himself up and you wince at the string of blood between his hand and your lips.

“Not gonna fuck ye yet, kitty,” he tells you, staring into your eyes with an intensity you don’t quite know what to do with. “Ghost’ll make the both of us regret it, and ye don’t deserve that on your first night home.”

You hardly manage to bite back a whimper. “Please…”

His eyes crease, like he’s smiling beneath the mask. “God, yer so scared, aren’t ye? I can fucking taste it in the air, kitty. It’s delicious. Cannae fuckin’ wait to have you on my tongue.” You shudder, eyes dropping to his neck when his gaze becomes too heavy.

He forces you to stand before you’re ready, leaving you to lean on him if only to avoid crumbling to the ground like a ragdoll. You ite your tongue against a sob at the sight of three corpses around you, a twisted sense of appreciation and disgust warring in your mind.

Johnny herds you like a dog, pushing you by the small of your back and your shoulders as he tries to catch back up with his partner. You’re left stumbling in front of him, unsure and terrified, not quite strong enough to think running away would be a good idea. It doesn’t take long for you to spot Ghost’s large back on the street in front of you, and a part of you resents the fact that he’s already so recognizable. 

He’s an overeager shadow, unable to decide if he wants to tug you forward or chase you from behind. He ends up almost circling you, shifting from your back to your side to your front and back again, always moving, always rushing. It leaves you unstable and nervous, unable to predict what he'll do next.

Chills run down your spine at the thought of this man… taking you. If you’re this terrified of him fully clothed, you’re loath to think of how you’ll react when he gets you where he wants you.

The two of you only manage to catch up to Ghost because he stops for a cigarette. His pale jaw is exposed when he tugs the mask up enough, and you try your best to memorize the scars covering his face, telling yourself that you’ll remember him, that you’ll never let him near you again once this night is over.

The look he sends Johnny is approving, the look he sends you is distinctly smug. It makes your teeth grind, makes you really wish you still had that knife so you could lurch forward, thrust the blade into the solid center of him and twist, pull out again and aim a little higher, then again, then again, then again-

“Made your choice, then?”

“Yes, sir. Wanna be good.”

Ghost hums, flicking the butt of his cig then dropping it to the ground, the cherry still glowing. “Settin’ a good example for your girl, huh? That’s my boy.”

The sound Johnny makes is animalistic, and despite the harsh grip he’s got on your arm you try to lean as far away as possible. There’s a building energy under his skin, a twitch in his fingers, that unnerves the animal part of your brain in ways Ghost doesn’t. 

“‘Course. Gonna teach her how to be good, too, gonna keep her perfect for us.”

Ghost is completely stoic with the mask tugged back over his face, nothing but his heavy gaze as he stares you down. It’s hard not to jerk away from Johnny and run, no matter how futile you know the effort would be. 

He reaches out a big, gloved hand towards your face, moving quickly enough that you can’t fully flinch away and hide your face in your shoulder or chest. His thumb strokes across your cheekbone, smearing the sticky mess of liquid across your face and huffing a sound just loud enough for you to hear.

“Cat got your tongue, girl?” He rumbles, a faint note of something in his voice lost in the sounds of anarchy behind you.

You try to shake your head, unable to manage anything more than a, “Please.”

Johnny scoffs beside you, wrapping both of his massive arms around your shoulders and holding you close. “Broken record, this one. Hasn’t said much else since we nicked her.”

“That’s alright,” Ghost rumbles, give Johnny one firm stroke over his mohawk. “I’m sure you’ll drag all sorts of pretty sounds out of her tonight. Now, let’s get goin’. Don’t want your little toy gettin’ her nerve up and earnin’ herself a punishment so early in the night. Come, now.”

Johnny laughs, loud and harsh as he tugs you to follow him and Ghost. You know you should be upset about what he’s said, know he should be doing exactly what he warns against and try to get away.

But you’ve got no energy left to fight. Everything hurts, your system is overrun by fear and just the tiniest drop of adrenaline, and your best chance of making it through this night is passing out and forgetting any of it ever happened.  

A few tears, stragglers, drip down your cheeks when Johnny tugs you beside him. The places his fingertips squeeze against your arm have gone numb, and your feet feel like they’re on fire. Your arms are sluggishly bleeding and you’re not convinced you don’t have a concussion.

It’s hard to hold back sobs when you think of how much worse it’s going to get. Staring at the broad back of Ghost, feeling the feral energy of Johnny hardly contained by your side, all you can hope is that they let you survive the night.

You close your eyes as Johnny guides you, take a deep, steadying breath, and pray for your own strength. You tell yourself that maybe next year you can seek them out, find them at the very start of the Purge and get your revenge.

It’s a comforting enough daydream to lessen the aches of your body, to shine a spot of light after the hurricane of your future. 

[ryuichirou]

Replies

Some replies, mostly about yesterday’s post!

Anonymous asked:

Red riding hood if Jack was the wolf:

"My, grandmother what big tits you've got!"

Anon, I cackle every time I read this ask. I’m obsessed. Thank you for this image in my head 😭😭😭 DAMN, grandmother!

Anonymous asked:

Hot damn didn't know i needed jack ans diece un their new years outfit .asking out and possibly screwing till like two seconds ago.

Also did you see how gamer boy Lilia looks in his lounge wear?

I feel you, Anon. These two are sneaky as a ship, you don’t think about them until you do, and then you can’t stop… we really couldn’t resist… and these two couldn’t resist each other as well, it seems…

ALSO YES!!! He looks perfect omg I’m so glad we got his thighs and legs, and just as we thought, his pjs look so comfy and very gamer-boy-like...!

fate-muse-club-house asked:

Sam's gonna have to sanitize his whole store when Jacks is done with Deuce.

New Year event is cancelled – the venue is getting immediately sanitised and everyone is quarantined for breathing in too much sex air… horrible!

Anonymous asked:

The only thing getting done on the job there is Deuce

Yeah… instructions were unclear, Jack is working hard, but not in the right way…!

eh-nonnie-mouse asked:

Jack has such big booba, but how much of that is muscle? Is it soft and squishy against Deuce's chest? Is this how he will win the boyfriend wars? (Also is he protecting Deuce's head? Like did Jack slam him against the wall for kisses but was polite enough to protect his noggin?)

This is such a good question! I think they are a little bit soft, soft enough to squish against Deuce’s chest and for Deuce to press his fingers against it, but it’s still pretty muscle-y. So mostly tough, but with a little bit of squish! Perfect for those who don’t like sleeping on softer pillows.

Awwww, Jack protecting Deuce’s head sounds cute…! But I think he just wanted to play with his soft hair… he probably doesn’t even realise what his hands are doing, he is too focused on drooling all over his mouth.

Anonymous asked:

Huh

Maybe that'll make him more decisive

Maybe~

But honestly, I feel like Deuce has this love-triangle curse when the moment he feels like he knows what choice he is going to make, the other boy suddenly comes in and makes him reconsider. I wonder what Ace is going to do to outshine Jack’s New Year Boob glory though hmmmm

characharing asked:

naturally Deuce's the bottom because his ass can flex its muscles on Jack's knot and Ace's dick, y'all. Leona's could but he doesn't have the energy to bother doing so

(this is related to some asks from yesterday)

YES, EXACTLY! Deuce has a talent not a lot of people possess!

And those who do are apparently too lazy to use it, right, Leona..?

characharing asked:

btw do you remember or saw about the reddit guy who got his peen stuck inside a m&m container and kept calling it cylinder while asking for help on reddit

which of the boys would do it, i can see Ace and maybe Deuce (is it a top or bottom thing, i think Deuce could be tricked to do it). Azul would be the funniest tho and more in denial he tried to fuck an m&m container

You know what’s funny, someone sent us an ask about that reddit post a year ago! And I can’t blame neither you nor that Anon, because when you read about a guy getting his cylinder stuck in an m&m container, the first thought you get is “alright so which one of the NRC boys” lol

And I thought I had a proper reply to that written a year ago, BUT NOPE, I just went “alright so which one of the NRC boys” and called it a day lol ALL OF THEM WOULD! In different circumstances…

Ace would definitely be my first guess, all of the freshmen in general. Poor Deuce could easily get tricked… Epel would absolutely get stuck like that too!! Jack and Sebek are a bit too big, but if Sebek got into that situation, he would definitely call it a cylinder lol

Maybe some of the 3rd years have embarrassing stories to tell from when they also were freshmen…

God, now I’m thinking about Azul doing that. Nooo, Azul, you have to stop getting into tiny dark spaces, I know it’s your thing but come on! Get your cylinder free…

[moonshynecybin]

Have you ever thought about reporter!marc having his own podcast?? Like years after his falling out with Valentino he starts one with Alex, and it actually breaks out of the niche of motogp simply because it’s so well done. It becomes a staple in riders yearly marketing duties, with Marc asking insightful questions, maybe getting some acclaim outside the pieces he would write on Valentino. Like ppl who don’t even watch races will tune in to listen because it hits that sweet spot of expert explaining what they love with passion. The end game of all of this is of course the divorce episode, where by some power of god Valentino does an interview on the podcast. And, as has happened in real life, he is much more open and vulnerable on the podcast even though it’s marcs (especially because it’s marcs??)… it either starts them toward reconciliation or next level fame trauma or both :)

the thing about this au is that SHOULD initially be more resentful of each other— marc is a reporter prying at vale’s careful facade and vale is a representation of everything that marc wanted but never got. they each catch on the other’s most tender of issues and it SHOULDDDDD prevent them from falling in love crazystyle but unfortunately for them it does not. truly they are friendly they are yappers they are personable and marc has that same razor sharp but occasionally goofy gleam in his eye that vale does and an insane little face to boot. reallyyruly deeply they just have an instant and natural affinity for each other… UNFORTUNATELY for them, this also means that when the breakup happens it is just a bad if not WORSE than irl. just like it happens here, apply some pressure career-wise, and all of the reasons they SHOULD hate each other start to look a lot more viable… they do NOT forgive people fucking with their ability to succeed…

so. anyways your beautiful little scenario. it’s a few years post sepang and they have an overly professional but CLEARLY cold detente. still make each other hyena laugh occasionally in that deranged way that they do but after that it’s like. ignoring each other in presscons while marc asks increasingly insane questions about vale’s age with every new article…. marc (along with every other journo) has a podcast (i think he videos it so he has an excuse to throw on one of his slut turtlenecks) and its pretty successful because marc has this inherent ability to understand/create narrative in sport (usually he uses this power on himself but i for one would LOVE to see his hot takes on the others lol) which i DO think is literally the mark of a good sports journalist. they are paid to do rpf, in a way. BUT the most notable thing is the WAYYYYYY he talks about vale… incisive. oddly almost worshipful. frank. strange note of tension coloring his voice. funny. occasionally mean. sometimes he starts a story off about the two of them from when he was just starting his career with abject delight in every line of his posture before cutting himself off and changing the subject… and the thing is i DONT think he gets vale on the pod until post reconciliation and then he drops like. a two hour intimate interview of them cackling like LUNATICS out of genuinely fucking NOWHERE and every single listener in the world is like i thought they HATED EACH OTHER ?? an absolute BOMB in the motogp journo podcasting world