#the way he constantly has hold of him
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LOKI S02E01 “Ouroboros”
#loki#mobius#lokius#loki laufeyson#mobius m mobius#lokitvedit#dailyloki#lokitvsource#marveledit#mcuedit#mine#here's more lokius bc i love and miss them#i hate this colouring but we move#the way that mobius guides loki to a quiet space so he can calm down#the way he constantly has hold of him#THE EYE CONTACT IN THE 3RD GIF TOO#.....YEAH!
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I don’t think we’ve ever seen you draw knight of dawn before 🤔 what are your thoughts about him? Or take?
I've drawn him a couple of times, just really little/in the background. but I should draw him more, I love this guy a lot! I have many, many thoughts about him and the way he parallels Silver...and also I think it is extremely funny that his ghost is stuck in a ring. especially considering where that ring has been for the last 16-ish years.
#art#twisted wonderland#twisted wonderland spoilers#twisted wonderland episode 7 spoilers#twisted wonderland book 7 spoilers#don't mind me just killing time waiting for maintenance to end so i can stick my face directly into 7-12#i mean i'm on the record (read: constantly posting) about how much i love the whole tragique backstory behind mal's birth#and. look. hold on it's a day ending in y time to be embarrassing about anime characters online again#no but really i love him. i love how he's such a vague figure but also the way his and silver's stories contrast#i cannot articulate it very well but just#i love how he's essentially like...bad end silver#he let himself go along with the big evil plan because he wanted to save his dad and not betray his king and all that#and when he finally did take a stand it was too late to stop the worst of it#meanwhile silver was immediately like NOPE WE'RE NOT DOING THIS#silver is NOT going to end up slaying the dragon thank you very much#me kicking my stupid little legs in glee over it all#and! the retrospect when you realize! that he was the one leading silver around lilia's memories!!!!#he is so happy that silver and lilia have each other!#he's so happy for them!#i want to put him in a can and hold him in my pocket for 16 years#also: his ridiculous hair. it's so silly and so good.#may vil never meet him#the knowledge that there's someone with naturally gorgeous hair who has somehow done it even dirtier than silver would destroy him
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God forbid you ever criticize the lack of consequences Bakugou experiences in MHA, or suddenly you’ll find dozens of Bakugou stans pouring into your mentions to make a speech about how cruel you are for forcing him to eat cement. They’ll act as though “consequences” inherently involves throwing him into the dungeon or putting him in detention for 100 years and then moan about how him facing consequences would only perpetuate a cycle of abuse/discrimination.
Listen, it’s not really that much of a consequence if the “consequence” in question isn’t directly connected to his current or past bad behaviour. “Oh but his scars!” “When he died that one time!” “His guilt for getting kidnapped” None of those are related to his bullying, and in my opinion, that makes them insufficient as consequences in an arc about changing for the better.
The consequences I would actually like to see could be as simple as: Izuku feels sad/mad because of what he went through, or certain characters reflect on how Bakugou’s past impacts their perception of him. More introspection on the victim’s end is needed, Bakugou doesn’t necessarily need to be pilloried for the arc to be satisfying.
#No#listing off every bad thing that has ever happened to Bakugou doesn’t prove that he faced consequences for being a bully#What these types truly want is the most digestible redemption arc they can possible imagine. Where the bully character is let off the hook#in every way while the victim’s side of the story is overshadowed by the narrative focusing so much on the bully’s side#Also don’t you dare try to *But Izuku doesn’t hold a grudge!!! why do you want him to pray on Bakuchan’s downfall?#me.#Izuku isn’t a real person and his feelings on the matter are dictated by an author who clearly prioritizes Bakugou’s emotional development#and introspective over Izuku’s (who is reduced to the awful position of constantly approaching his for#bully with: *You’re doing great sweetie!* as opposed to actually reflecting on how the bullying affected him for the worse#anti bakugou#anti bakugo katsuki#anti horikoshi#anti bakudeku#mha critical#mha fandom critical#fandom discourse#MHA salt#anti mha fandom#my hero academia
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RETURN TO MONKE (PUBERTY EDITION)
MK’s monkey form doesn’t feel right to me so i wanted to break up his transformation into stages. Maybe as he learns to accept that side of himself it becomes part of him, instead of changing between human and monkey randomly (which is probably painful). Love yourself, NOW!!!
@zymstarz im tagging you for FULL MONKE
#ALSO BECAUSE. THAT BOY NEEDS A NOSE#i like the idea of MK constantly flashing between his monkey and human forms as some sort of internal conflict or identity crisis#and he can’t hold his monkey form for very long soo. I’m going to put way too much thought into it and say its some sort of repression#also I made the hair on the sides of his face more attached or growing on the cheeks so it kind of frames it#maybe it’s because his design is so top heavy on his head and that’s why the sideburns feel wrong to me#like it’s fine with Swk and macaque because their hair is more like a tuft. but MKs hair is longer it just feels less balanced shape wise#I also don’t see his tail being very strong right off the bat because it’s. a new limb so the muscle has to be underdeveloped imo#I’m still a firm believer in the face mark XP system though. that is his Minecraft experience bar fight me#ALSO ALSO going back to him flashing between human and monkey. I just like this idea because to complement that idea of identity crisis#like think about it. if he comes to accept this new part of himself he doesn’t have to decide between one or the other I guess? like he#gets used to exploring this part of his identity. also it’s like Pokémon evolution lol#my art#myart#doodles#lego monkie kid#lmk#monkie kid#lmk season 4 spoilers#lmk s4 spoilers#lmk season 4#lmk s4#lmk MK#lmk xiaotian#lego monkie kid fanart#lmk fanart
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Deeply deeply attached to the idea of Potemkin and Dizzy being friends and an unreasonably large portion of that is the thought that she's basically one of the few things he would be able to hug and not immediately reduce to paste
#do you think he has ever been held before#do you think he's ever physically touched a human being in a non-combat setting since his mutations manifested#even with his containment suit he constantly has to be restraining himself to avoid accidents#his existence is walking on eggshells and being hypervigilant#how much does that have to fucking suck#I mean maybe someone could touch *him* if he sat very still and was incredibly careful#but not being able to touch or hold anything without decimating it has got to be a stressful way to live#I can imagine her throwing her arms around him since Dizzy is a naturally affectionate person#then expressing surprise at him not reciprocating the gesture#and after finally convincing him that she'll be fine and he has nothing to worry about he's still as hesitant as humanly possible#but as soon as he realizes she isn't exaggerating and he isn't going to kill her he fucking liquefies#please the man is so touch starved he's in desperate need of an indestructible cuddle buddy#potemkin#guilty gear#op back on her bullshit
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Lucky is he, Who lives unaware
#fantasy high#dimension 20#d20#fhjy#d20 fhjy#buddy dawn#the rat grinders#bakarath#oisin hakinvar#ivy embra#mary anne skuttle#ruben hopclap#potatart#i had to get these drawings out of my system. thinkng about how buddy was an outcast from the beginning#how he was left behind. how disposable he was#i think buddy is very isolated from the people around him from both himself the adults around him and the way he was raised#maybe he finds comfort in connecting with a deity#im gonna go insane. he has so much potential for good things if only he was actually given a chance#and not constantly being taken advantage of by people who dont care about him#rips my hair out#“arent you tired of being nice dont you want to just go apeshit” “dang y'all”#buddy dawn is going through it i think. just having a spectacularly AWFUL time#fhjy spoilers#NOBODY TALKS ABOUT HOW TIRING IT IS TO BE ANGRY ALL THE TIME. ITS AWFUL#hold on. i have a drawing of kalina and buddy dawn in a car running from the cops but thay didnt fit the tone of this post lol#they have walter white and jessi pinkman vibes to me. you get it#also id like to comment that the last image was meant to convey less of a#“the rat grinders didnt care about buddy dawn!!!” (though i think thats true to some extent)#and more of like. the idea that those four were saved and buddy was not#<- i like the rat grinders
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have a snippet from the lil kwami swap thing i'm working on!
High above the streets of Paris, Mister Bug and Lady Noire talk about love.
It's a dangerous topic, to be sure; one that has to be tiptoed around with utmost care. A balancing act for Mister Bug. For Lady Noire too, perhaps, but she never seems like it affects her quite as much. Maybe that's why she's the one who brings it up.
"Are you in love, Mister Bug?"
His feet, from where they'd been kicking back and forth rhythmically, come to a stop. "Huh?"
"I'm just curious," says Lady Noire. On the rooftop they sit, there's more than a few centimeters of space between them. A gap that they're both waiting for Mister Bug to bridge. He only wishes he could. "Are you?"
Mister Bug tries to catch her eye. "Are you sure you want to talk about this? We... we don't have to--"
She waves a clawed hand in the air dismissively. "It's fine," she says, even though he knows it's not. He wonders what it is that's fine: talking about love, or talking about love when they both know he won't -- he can't -- reciprocate her feelings? "I wanna know. Is there anyone you love?"
There is.
#miraculous ladybug#mister bug#lady noire#misternoire#kwami swap#fic snippet#kwami swaps are fun but also frustrating#bc there is SO much behind the scenes stuff that needs to be considered#like if adrien is the ladybug then that means he would be the guardian right#wouldn't that affect his hero persona then? wouldn't he be the one to be more responsible and careful?#and for marinette wouldn't lady noire be more of an escape? a time in her life when she DOESN'T have to be so responsible and careful?#and kwami swap means reverse crush#which comes with its own complications#because if lady noire has a crush on her partner and also sees her persona as an escape#then wouldn't SHE be the more flirty one? and wouldn't mister bug constantly hold himself back not wanting to give her the wrong idea?#the one time in his life someone has trusted him enough to give him a responsibility#wouldn't he do all he could to uphold that and take it seriously?#whatever...you get it#tldr#this is way more character work than i thought it would be#nemali writes
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Honestly, even without Art’s attempts at manipulation and sabotage, I don’t think Patrick and Tashi’s relationship would’ve survived anyway. Before they started dating, Patrick was criticizing her career plans and Tashi was never interested in entertaining his massive ego at her expense. Passion and chemistry are important to relationships, but if that’s the only foundation, it’s gonna crumble quickly.
The only difference between Patrick/Tashi vs Art/Tashi is that the relationship would’ve ending with a bang instead of a whimper.
#challengers#challengers spoilers#patrick and tashi need art between them#his willingness to submit even when done so with manipulative intentions does let tashi and patrick to indulge in their desire for control#the movie makes a point of saying that patrick is constantly shooting himself in the foot because he’s unwilling to humble himself#art let patrick get away with a LOT but tashi does and would not#but even tho patrick does get to the point where he can humble himself it’s still necessary for patrick to go off script and stir shit up#the way the film ends makes it abundantly clear that all three of them need each other to function#and that each person brings something different to the trio that each person needs#so i don’t buy that patrick and tashi could’ve worked things out on their own#tashi so clearly likes art’s dependence and loyalty to her#while also getting a lot from patrick’s passion and pushback#would also like to say that i personally love when art’s a mean little bitch#not only cause it’s fun but because it really seems born out of a fear of being left alone/behind#spreading my ‘art’s a greedy pillow princess that actually needs TWO tops to handle him’ agenda#and wrt the injury…sorry no one’s actually at fault for that#not only could no one could ever engineer something like that#it could’ve happened at any time because that’s life#in the film it’s meant to underscore the danger of disharmony between all three of them#and snap the tenuous thread holding all three of them together#and placing blame kind of misses the overall point the film is going for wrt the relationship between all three#hey is it just me or has this film broken my brain
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https://twitter.com/danfetes/status/1712166167572361344
josh says people saying stuff about stef ticks him off 😭 that's the meanest he'll ever get off the field 😭
that was kinda... 😏😏😏
and i definitely know stef feels the same... 😏
" tired of hearing all this nonsense... lot of guys in this league that have that same fire that don't get talked about, but--"
" frankly that kind of ticks me off when people wanna say stuff about him, but... we'll keep that all internal here 🙂🙃🫥."
this is allen at his boiling point omg 😭😭 held back by pr
#reporter: we talked to josh and we asked him a question about y-#stef smirks in Yeah. I Bet You Did. Bitch.😎 we're a two packaged deal. inseparable 😎 (insufferable) im his right hand man. his silly rab-#the sassy pose and the fond smile. theyre so untouchable dramatic ass top of the foodchain powercouple it's Unreal.#WHERE IS THE RPF!?!??!?!????#josh and allen sooooo fucked after this#fucked HARRRRD bro fucked HARD#and they were both soo ready for it like you cant tell me they didnt fuck nasty after this HELLO#we cant always bet on them winning but the fuck nasty is surely guranteed#diggs had the bed all set up with romantic candlelight and roses and josh hurdled over all that shit just to hold him in his arms#josh caught on fire a little bit but diggs patted the flames down before he could notice#all the snow piled up around their home in buffalo could not muffle the 'youre my qb.. ure my qb' pants& moans which shake those very walls#josh '🙃🙃' the hell outta this interview#he said YOU may not understand diggs horrors but **I** DO!!@@! **I** UNDERSTAND. I GET THEM.#the frustration of seeing everyone hate on his husband when he knows all of that pales in how much stef hates himself#AND THAT MAKES JOSHS LITTLE STUNNED FACE ALL THE MORE SAD LIKE. HES SO HURT FOR STEF.#AND HE JUST KNOWS. he KNOWS the public is gonna spin this horribly. make stef the diva they always degrade him as#josh has CONSTANTLY with like a bear pacing around the cracked glass enclosure barely disguised rage#defended stef from misinterpretation and disdained the diva drama so vehemently#so everytime josh messes up or stef messes up or they lose all josh is thinking and feeling is 'im fucking this up for him even more#i dont care if theyre gonna be mad at me. diggs is hurting. somehow some way. diggs is gonna get Hurt.#and i cant do anything but talk. and i cant even do that well.#it's all my fault i cant do anything im so stupid im so stupid'#saint bernard song 1 hour#that single wide eyed stare he gives his wr bcs all he can do is stare as stef's pain surges#it's not fear of stef as the media tries to portray for qbwr tension. it's fear For stef.#he knows theres hurt. and he knows theres gonna be even more hurting. and. the nail. he knows he cant do anything to help it from stopping#'why couldnt i throw better. i need to just run it to lessen the chances. i need to do something. i need to be better. i have to be better'#meanwhile diggs could care less abt what everyone else thinks about him. he just cares abt how josh thinks. about josh#stef wants to perform well so josh can actually feel well. be able to express anything he wants without worry or treading#diggs/allen
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who’s ready for more yakumo trauma talk-! *i am forcibly removed from the stage before i can begin speaking*
#something something yakumo is the type to try and push down and ignore his trauma#and focus on happy moments and the fact that his life is generally better now#but quincy knows from experience that just constantly ignoring traumatic events and pretending like you’re fine#(or even convincing yourself you are fine in yakumo’s case)#is just a recipe for disaster and an invitation for all of that trauma to come bubbling up to the surface#in a way that’s impossible to ignore and extremely distressing#yakumo so badly wants to pretend he’s not affected by the cult situation or being kidnapped#or almost seeing eiden and olivine bleed out in front of him#he can’t.. function normally if he thinks about it so he is Not thinking about it#quincy can tell something’s wrong tho. he can always tell when something is wrong with his loved ones#so he invites yakumo to spend time at his home to kind of relax and unwind but#yakumo just takes it as ‘oh mr quincy is inviting me over to his home i can’t be annoying and act visibly traumatized’#because that’s just the type of person he is. he doesn’t want to be a burden to anyone#so eventually quincy just has to hold him and tell him as firmly as he can without making yakumo more upset#that pretending everything is fine when it isn’t is never going to work#nu carnival#yakumo ♡#quincy ♡#quincamo#mouser muses
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Was contemplating the whole ‘Tommy has no friends except Alfie’ thing/thought (it’s my own internal running joke too) but it can't really be true?
Tommy appears to have this huge social network, groups of people he’s still in touch with from the war, including internationally, and including in the officer class; these supposed very reliable contacts in Ireland which I can only assume ties back to the family connections to Ireland and maybe some visit across in his past; the huge respect (and edge of fear) network in Small Heath extending broader into Birmingham; seemingly a very *useful* social-climbing networking he's developed to be able to get the mayor and various politicians to the Grace Shelby charity opening in S3, a society networking which he maintains and builds upon all the way through to Tommy being able to invite actual upper crust society to a ballet at his house (and people attend!)
I mean, there's a level of reserve (rank/war respect) or transactional basis (professional tit for tat society networks), but he also had more friend style connections with say Barney, Freddie (even if it’s soured by the time we see it) and Danny (again, changed by Danny’s own PTSD into that Sergeant-Major thing, but lots of hints it wasn't always like that).
I’ve imagined Tommy puts a significant effort into his social (and society) networking as he does into his business - staying in touch, staying useful, even to the point of using Arthur (or let's imagine his secretaries, his ministerial aides, Polly; picking the right 'hand' who can maintain that relationship for him) to ensure letters and communications keep happening so people remain aware of him, and he stays alive in people’s minds at any possible level of class. He'd have to be maintaining that network like a garden.
The party for Lizzie also didn’t seem like a first time thing for them so I also imagine he hosts quite a lot of social affairs to remain current and connected, which becomes vitally imperative in a different way as a politician compared to a businessman.
But I think that default inner joke, Tommy has no friends and is isolated, is sometimes the claustrophobia of the actual seasons/scenes we see, which are so zoomed into him, into the family, into the worst, that I sometimes double think myself. Just...there’s no way he’s as successful as he is without pouring buckets of effort into society. Admittedly, maybe hardly any of these networking connections are deep connections in the odd way Alfie became one, or Ben Younger could have been one, but Tommy would be talking and meeting and greeting and hosting and writing letters allllllll the time
#mr professional social butterfly; very possible that he still has no friends except alfie#but he'd have to be in society as a social well-connected man to hold his position the way he does#as a bookie or a gangster or a businessman or a politician or a patron of the arts or any of the various fields relying on networks#the next question is how naturally it comes to him or does he try to break it down into a formula and grit his teeth through it#i like to imagine he'd be quite social and entertaining if not constantly in a borderline panic attack due to Circumstances#i have writ elements of this in my fics and there is a theme here for me with Mosley mocking Tommy's social efforts as gauche/blatant#but yeah anyway i always run headlong into this wall of how close/claustrophobic his life/manner is shown when he'd HAVE to have personal-#-connections everywhere to work the way he does and would have an invite to some function or another every third day
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thinking about tena taking the photos of her children out of the frames and burning them before she died and mulder’s first reaction being “this is all she had left of us”
and how he could’ve said “this is all she had left of her,” but he didn’t, and he’s right. it is all there was left of them. all there was left of two kids playing baseball and arguing over a board game. all there was left of him before he was walking into the same room every day, before he was chasing ghosts, before no one talked about it.
all there was left of there being nothing to chase, of being still, of being a whole person to someone, knowing where you stand in the world.
it’s all she had left of her children, together and complete for some of the last times, and it’s crime scene evidence to cover up.
#it really puts the way that he constantly has photos of the 2 of them everywhere in a different perspective tbh#one of my favorite things about mulder as a character is the way that he does see samantha as a full person#not just a quest or in relation to him#and he has photos of her alone too#her school photo on the wall#her on the jungle gym on his desk at the office AND at home#but there are photos of the two of them everywhere#and those are the ones that he carries with him and that we see him pick up and hold and grieve and cry over#all that’s left of who they both were#of who HE was#thinking of that audries fic#‘the mulder with a missing limb’#sein und zeit
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your perception of itafushi. my beloved. my favorite little barbie dolls that gege loves to wind up. i miss them.
like the idea of yuuji being so jealous over megumi? the sunshine himbo…losing it at the sight of megumi smiling at this perfect little asshole who is totally hiding under an anxious mess facade. there’s no way someone could have it all and their this good guy. yuuji is waiting for the day yuuta messes up i just know it.
even with yuuji finally understands their dynamic i just know that those two have subtle competitions over megumi attention. like…it gets to the point where throwing cars at each other is the norm. (cue nanami being horrified at his legal and emotional children throwing cars at each other over a child of gojo. like yes he adores megumi. but somehow this is all gojo fault. don’t ask nanami how.)
BUT THE IDEA OF THE ZENINS BEING SO YUUJIPHOBIC? like the idea of them shuddering at the idea of megumi fucking around with the vessel of sukuna? that they had to set a bounty on him just to keep him away from their precious runaway heir? i just know mai pops out to the school just to bitch about megumi and his boyfriend being like modern day romeo and juliet.
i also love to imagine sukuna being a firm zenin hater. like he’s not even willing to eat them. he firmly believes that all of them taste like shit. especially naoya.
See I just love the idea of Yuuji being jealous over Megumi but exclusively when it comes to Okkotsu Yuuta. He’s legitimately not a jealous person. He’s never been jealous of anyone before in his life. He’s deeply secure in what he has with Megumi and knows that Megumi likes him back and that there’s no need to be worried or upset about Megumi having close relationships with other people. He wants Megumi to have close relationships outside of him.
But the universe fucking bends to give that perfect beautiful bastard everything Yuuji has ever dreamed of.
It’s a new experience for yuuji. He’s not used to experiencing jealousy. He’s literally never done it before. But there’s this impossibly gorgeous and perfect man swanning around out there getting his death sentence overturned and having his curse royalty unattach from his body in sparkling globes of light and having Nanamin legally adopt him as his actual child and having Megumi be His Boy and apparently it’s universally acknowledged* that Megumi is still Yuuta’s Boy despite Yuuji going to Herculean efforts to lock that shit down. He has assassins trying to kill him because it’s universally agreed** that his boyfriend is out of his league, apparently, and his boyfriend is still someone else’s Boy.
It does not help that when the Assassin Problem first appears yuuji wants to go to Gojo and Megumi decides he cannot take that level of humiliation and suggests going to Yuuta first. Which makes Yuuji insist that no no, he can handle a few assassins. No need to bother any impossibly beautiful upperclassman about it who are apparently better than Yuuji in every way. He’s got this on his own. Nooo problem.
Megumi stares at him for three unbroken seconds and goes to ask Yuuta for advice about it, which results in the second years going off to unilaterally threaten the Zenin clan, which none of the first years ever find out about.
Sukuna absolutely does hate the Zenin clan and it’s specifically because they did not consider him when putting a bounty on yuujis head. He’s a firm believer in knowing your worth and he knows his fucking worth. Sorcerers used to have style. They used to have respect. What the fuck is this. The Zenin are not worth dog shit on his heel. He’ll kill them all.
*universally acknowledged by everyone except Megumi, who still does not know that people call him that
** universally agreed by everyone except Todo, who thinks his brother is a beautiful beautiful man that anyone would be lucky to court and that Fushiguro is a boring child with a nonexistent ass who has inexplicably bewitched a gorgeous specimen of manhood.
#sea glass gardens#Nanami is so confused and tired#he doesn’t know how Yuuta inspired so much animosity in yuuji before they ever met#for the record Yuuta doesn’t know either#he’s constantly going through it how could anyone be jealous of his life#cannot emphasize enough Yuuta loves Megumi but does not want to kiss him#he’s not looking to take megumi from yuuji#he can be Their Boy just in different ways#the Zenin are specifically yuujiphobic#look clan heads have had plenty of dalliances on the side over the years#if megumi has certain needs to be fulfilled he can find someone in the clan as long as he marries a woman within the Zenin and produces#heirs and also as long as that person is not itadori yuuji#the ten shadows CANNOT be with the fucking vessel of sukuna#pick anyone else than the idiot pink haired possessed freak pick ANYONE ELSE#megumi is. so tired.#this is his first boyfriend okay and most of their relationship consists of going to terrible movies and blushing fire engine red while#holding hands. they are very much NOT thinking about marriage or kids or whatever and megumi cannot emphasize enough that he does NOT want#to marry and have kids with his cousin or aunt or whatever. he does not want to do that. megumi in my mind treads the line between asexual#and pansexual where he just doesn’t like people as a rule except when he does. yuuji sort of is the first person he’s really genuinely into#this is new and exciting for him and he would not admit that on pain of death but he sort of just wants to have his first boyfriend without#his fucking abusive bio family freaking the fuck out about how he needs to have incest children with his blood family like god this is the#nightmare scenario. meanwhile I think Megumi’s the first boy yuujis ever really liked. like he’s had guy celebrities he’s thought were#attractive before but megumi was his first crush on a boy and his first real relationship and he’s sort of not got a lot of time left in#life and would LOVE it if he could spend that time holding his boyfriends hand. what do you mean he has insane bio family who wants him to#marry his mean lesbian aunt. that’s fucking insane.
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Under the cut are mostly self-insert doodles of decreasing quality. Again, not much directly tied to Team Fortress 2. Might as well toss these out while I have no access to my puter. Much yapping under the cut and in the tags incoming.
Another self-insert, this time less of a "here's me as a tenth class" and more of a "here's my game experiences translated into the class I would take the place of". The Cleaner. Although I guess they could still be wearing either suit. It doesn't matter that much.
That one Convict's Case taunt with Backup would be extremely funny, because the man would be on the verge of a breakdown (he does not want to go to jail so bad you have no idea). The second image- I owe no explanation. You know what I am. You see the pattern with my favourites.
The duality of the man. Resting face versus "just heard you express interest in religion/Russian folklore" face. He's not that hard to make friends with, when you pull him away from all the explosions.
Some doodles of trying to figure his face out. Unfortunately, the more I stare at him, the more I worry that he looks like A Certain Guy With The Last Name "Kazarin", and the fear of never being original in my life caught up to me.
Don't look at me, don't perceive me, I refuse to explain any of my actions to you.
#team fortress 2#tf2#that's it that's the only tags i am putting this in. maybe someday i will have the balls to do more but for now that's about it#while i have the chance - and since posts with more of my yapping in the tags don't pop in people's feeds much - i might as well ramble-#-about these guys here. self-inserts or not i'm projecting only half of my bullshit on each one of them. creativity 👍#backup is tall and pale and has sharp canines and more of a dull brown hair colour with tired grey eyes. no amount of babyface or soft-#-hands can really help a motherfucker when he's grimacing so much because he just Hates being around half the people on the team.#cleaner meanwhile is on the shorter side and has constantly flushed skin and brighter colours and whatnot. you can't see it because of the-#-mask most of the time but they do smile a lot more and have a more cheery disposition towards life and see the whole team as their friends!#backup transitioned fully (albeit not very legally lmao) and is scared shitless of not being seen as a man although the last time that ever-#-came up was years ago. he holds onto his last name as part of the heritage he loves and loathes at the same time - attached to his culture-#-and religion and bloodline while also resentful of his family and the regime he knows someone else on the team suffered under.#cleaner just kinda binds and calls it a day. he only does it to confuse the team because while he doesn't identify with being a girl he-#-loves the confused looks his epic gender reveal moment gets. they do not remember their family name or where they grew up or what even got-#-them to this kind of mental state. and he's chill with it he values the here and now way more than some dark edgy backstory.#backup despite trying to be an honest man is afraid of vulnerability as well. he stubbornly refuses to express love towards certain people-#-lest they feel disgusted and turn away. he's afraid of consequences afraid of losing the people he loves afraid of his ''interests'' being-#-what drives them away. it doesn't by the way and he just wasted time being a cold indecisive loser for several months lmao#cleaner wears a suit that hides all of them yes but they pretty much never lie. he is always his truest self and he can always just burn-#-people who don't like him enough to make it a problem. they are a lot more comfortable indulging in their interests - be they innocent-#-and juvenile or violent and dangerous. he is quite open with his affection and his fascinations that backup would rather keep secret.#i want to establish that these two can only exist in separate universes because they both have feelings towards the funny assistant lady-#-and the funny inventor guy (selfshipping for the winnn) and would fight over those two. cleaner would win by the way#it's also a really funny point of comparison. cleaner is objectively more fucked up than backup and still managed to be more normal about-#-their feelings and live as a healthier and happier person than that guy. comedic gold honestly#OKAY I'M DONE if you read up to here you get uhhh a cookie :-)
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“go to hell” is basic. “i hope you have the opportunity to write a romatically dense character in a situation where even you can see the other characters romantic sense” is smart. it’s possible. it’s terrifying
#❛ ♡ › jupiter : 𝐨𝐨𝐜.#insane how i keep on finding such trait haunting me ... got back into a game with my best friend and omg ... the character who i write in#our dynamic came out in leaks like : oh yeah i am avoiding them bc i think they hate me and now idk what to do with this distance ...#even though he ran away and this character spent years. EVEN AFTER THEY FOUGHT last time they spoke! to make sure they were alive.#constantly getting people to check up on him.#this is. uh a common occurance on this blog. a lot of my muses really struggle to see romantic interest in them and. in turn. can take years#in canon material to recognise their villains. not to sound cliche but its not your muses its them#dived into alie.n stage lore and discovered til.ls feelings for iv.an were listed as#unrealized feelings which honestly? i think has opened up a whole world of thoughts and tbh like a whole new way of looking at the dynamics#i hold with my particularly more dense muses and realised yeah? yeah#! that makes sm sense... its not that they werent in love at the same time#(they were and thats why they make some strange decisions. trust)#but did they understand it for what it truly was? maybe#maybe not. the not is more telling bc yeah ... that just makes sense 🫠#anyway good morning! today is definitely a message / gaming day. im going to try and keep an eye out for memes today but after sending#about 20 asks my brain coming up for starter plots is not 100% rn JFSJFJSKFJSJDJ#dynamics on the other hand .. 🥰
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hmm. niki settling into his new, food secure life and getting used to not constantly being filled with anxiety. niki having the energy to pay more attention to the world around him. niki feeling more upset and pissed off about things he would normally ignore but also feeling far happier far more often. niki finally being able to relax.
#speaking tag#MR SHIINA I LOVE YOU#PUT A FEW KILOS ON THIS MAN IMMEDIATELY ‼️‼️#i feel so sad for him bro#need to take a better look at how his disability has been affecting his life#like yeah. he has to eat way more and is very obsessed with food and cooking but what else ????#niki trying to keep a more laid-back approach to everything because he does NOT want to let himself be consumed by paranoia surrounding -#- whether or not he has enough food to keep him alive for the time being#i already have the headcanon that niki has pretty severe emetophobia because vomiting is just wasting calories which he REALLY can't afford#especially considering how he struggled with food in the past#happyele is underutilising my boy :((#i don't produce niki but i sure do love holding him under a microscope#and i do have a bunch of nikiP friends who are fun to talk about this guy with#but yeah. constantly having to fear for your life fucks you up and i wish this was explored better in the story.#it's not his birthday in my timezone anymore but i hope mr shiina had a wonderful day :]
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