#the two investeds mean the same thing I switched from one to the other
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bulletproof-slimeboy · 6 months ago
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Hey guys, it’s Charlie!
So I know I worried you all, with those streams and the disappearing and everything, but I’m okay now! Gonna be in the hospital for a bit but I’ll be back on track as soon as I can.
We’re going for he/him pronouns, in case you were wondering! I’ll figure out tags later- I just wanted to get something out there and let you know I’m okay.
Edit: Tags!
IC: #in-vested
OOC: #genlost the plot
Original posts: #clever chat pun
Talking to cast/ex-cast: #rgb but more and fucked up
Asks, anons and strangers: #what’s gooping gunkers (this is the tag to go for if you’re not sure whether I answered your ask!)
The end of a long rb chain: #and scene
TWs: This blog includes spoilers for Generation Loss as well as medical talk, injury and scars, abuse, serious mental illness/disorders and medication-related health complications.
This is a RP blog for post-show Charlie from Generation Loss! Rather, it’s a blog full of headcanons that mix with the others’ and our own plot because we’re filling in gaps-
…so basically fanfiction. It’s genloss fanfiction co-written by a cast and an audience. Read through, have fun, and feel free to ask and interact! If you want to join us, we’d be super happy to have you.
Extra special secret tags: #the hidden star, #what, #clever.chat.pun and #the genboopening
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maliro-t · 5 months ago
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some game design thinky thoughts.
#it speaks#da gameplay complaints so weird to me. which i say as someone whose favorite combat was origins.#i mean 1 like i just enjoy a lot of different types of games. including crpg style tactical and including action#and inclulding me style arpg#but fr like people just keep saying over and over 'only three abilities???????????' like bro did u know in dai#that one of the warrior abilities was COMBAT ROLL.#a lot of things like that were previously abiliities and can in real time combat become different kinds of mechanics#and lemme say as someone who never invests in combat roll i spend a lot of time in dai fighting dragons by fruitlessly jumping in the hope#that THIS time i might be able to dodge the incoming attack i can clearly see coming (i can't)#idk like the point is obv if you don't like action-oriented combat whatever but complaining about design changes which actually serve#to make GOOD action-oriented combat is wild to me.#love that it's still rtwp my beloved. love giving commands to followers. love that it's built around synergies and that the wheel actually#tells you things like detonation combos and enemy resistances because i love taking advantage of stuff like that but find often in games#that information is overly obscured or a hassle to discover#and if i in real time action combat had 20 different abilities to choose from while still needing to dodge out of the way and pop off#an attack- that would be at worst overwhelming and distracting and at best feel like more than i need.#and at the same time! the skill tree looks great. best i've seen from da (and iterated from other franchises well imo) and still looks#plenty deep and customizable. way more than me's five little blocks or whatever#and wrt to party control yeah i'll miss it i like it a lot!#but again for this style of combat i literally don't think you need it and that's okay!#the game feeling better for what it is is okay!#even in dai like i have a lot of moments in that game where it's actually more a nuisance than anything else to fully switch control#to use an ability. e.g. i usually spec solas out with spirit magic and i almost always will fully enter the tactical cam just to#tell him to cast a barrier. or a revive. or dispel some demons before they spawn in#like i'm literally already just telling him to use abilities and then i switch back to me. and in that game there are def times where i hav#thought yeah this would actually be smoother if i could just tell him to use it +position it!#i spend the most time party switching in origins esp on higher difficulties but obv the game is most fine tuned for that#and you can play through the entire series as if it were an arpg if you want. that's what i did when i was a kid lmfao#well anyways. that's my two cents! i think it'll be really engaging! from what i've seen the game director isn't talking out of her ass!#vir dirthera
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nayatarot777 · 7 months ago
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What Do You Love About Your Lover?
This reading applies to past, present or future lovers. Committed or casual.
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• Pile One •
Before I get into the reading, you guys may be a little toxic, Pile One 😂.
Something that you love about this person is how they have different masks that they wear with others. There’s something about you enjoying the way that they pretend to not have feelings for you or the way that they simply don’t show how they truly feel. I’m seeing that you can see through the mask but this intrigues you even more. This is giving “I like complicated people” ngl. There’s a way that this person tries to gaslight you out of seeing who they truly are and how they truly feel for you, but you get a kick out of this because you can tell that they’re lying. It’s like you perceive this as somewhat of a positive thing because (to you), this person hiding their feelings is proof that they truly do like you. Or that their feelings must be deep despite them not being a deep person, so it’s more authentic and easy to believe that they actually do genuinely like you. You also love how they’re very self-indulgent. How they focus on themselves and how they appreciate themselves. This person has a high sense of self-worth that attracts you to them and they might be the type to actually try to work on the parts of themselves that are damaged and in need of repair. The following is what makes me think that you guys are my toxic pile: you enjoy how they run away from intimacy. How you have to chase them and try to “tame” them in a way. Their fear of intimacy triggers a “I can fix you” switch in your mind, and you actually love this. Not something that I’d advise to feed into but 🤷🏾‍♀️. That’s what I’m seeing lmao.
Extended Reading: What Does Your Lover Love About You?
YouTube
Personal Readings
• Pile Two •
You don’t seem to have a very serious or committed connection to this lover, but you love how the passion is there all the same. You love how they reciprocate your feelings and your energy. How you like each other equally and things are quite intense and open between the both of you. You love how this person is someone who you can just have fun with. Someone who you can just enjoy your time with - with good sex, good food, good conversation. You love how you’re getting to know this person a lot more. You find them interesting and find yourself awaiting their reply to your messages or missed calls. I feel like this is someone who you actually wait around to hear back from, which may not be your usual temperament with the people who you date. You love how the conversations that you have with this person are rich and go deep. I’m seeing that this person is a chaser. You’ve picked up on their fear of abandonment and linked this to why they’re so open to investing time and energy into you, trying to keep you as happy as possible. And although this type of energy may put you off when it comes to others, there’s something about this person that makes that type of behaviour endearing. You love how they’re so invested into you and how they’re willing to chase after you in a way, which makes you feel appreciated. It feels like this makes you more open to putting energy into reciprocating the energy.
Extended Reading: What Does Your Lover Love About You?
YouTube
Personal Readings
• Pile Three •
You love that your lover is a source of stability for you. They’re just a stable person in general. Someone who offers a lot of security and permanence to the relationship as well as their own life - and, in turn, yours too. This is someone who’s very serious about planting seeds to something that can grow to endure the test of time. They’re not about fleeting desires or quick thrills. However, despite this stable energy, you appreciate how they’re not rigid. They’re actually quite flexible with their routines and their plans in life if it means that it’ll benefit the both of you in the long run. You also love how you can see that they’re healing from heartbreak from their past. They don’t sit and stew in their pain for long. They want to move on from heartbreak and pain that they’ve experienced in their past and mend themselves back together. For some of you, this person is finding freedom from a toxic relationship. For others of you, they’re freeing themselves from addiction and putting themselves back on track to a stable life. You love to see this. You also love how, despite their heavy past, they’re so lighthearted. Their energy is bright and very healing - not just towards themselves but you too. You love to see the way that they recognise the things that they need to heal within themselves. How they’re open to traumas or triggers in their subconscious mind coming to the light of their consciousness. You love how they’re willing to adapt their behaviour and their mindset towards life and the relationship when necessary, for the sake of healing and moving forward into more stability and security.
Extended Reading: What Does Your Lover Love About You?
YouTube
Personal Readings
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sojourner-between-worlds · 6 months ago
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Things about being a Christian I've had to unlearn as an adult:
Spending a lot of time on/ being invested in something doesn't make it an idol. This is not how that works, bestie. Look. I get that the advice "if you spend more time on x hobby than you do reading the Bible and praying" is well-intentioned, but it's just plain Bad. There are a lot of hobbies that take significant amounts of time. Art. Writing. Trade hobbies, like woodworking. I spent two hours Saturday putting in a garden (now that I have space for one!), and not spending two hours and one minute on Bible reading doesn't mean that gardening is now an idol for me. It means I got into a groove and just kept going (and got terribly sunburned for my trouble). What makes something an idol is NOT how much time you spend on it but rather the importance you place upon it. Sometimes important things take five minutes and sometimes they take an hour; the thing that took five minutes isn't less important because it took up less of your time. If your thought process is "this is more important than spending time with God", that is what makes your hobby an idol. (If you are constantly foregoing your time with God in favor of a hobby, then I'd say you need to re-evaluate your priorities, but spending a lot of time on something does not inherently make it an idol. Not to mention that a lot of hobbies can still bring you closer to God despite not spending that time intentionally for that purpose.)
Not having your "quiet time"/ devotions every day does not make you a "bad" Christian. This goes hand-in-hand with the previous point, and there's a lot I could say on this topic, but what it boils down to is this: God understands our human limits and the brains He gave us that sometimes make it difficult -- autism and ADHD and OCD and [fill in the blank]. I'm autistic. So when (well-meaning) people say things like, "you can't get to know God if you don't spend time with Him!" about praying and reading the Bible -- well, 'spending time' looks different for me. Socializing is difficult for me. And while socializing with God is obviously different than with people, praying is still far more mentally draining for me than for most people (especially growing up in an environment where it was implied that you have to 'say the right things' when you pray instead of just allowing it to be a conversation, but that's the next point). A lot of "socializing" for me is simply being present with someone else. This is called "parallel play": you're doing your own thing in the same space as someone else while they are also doing their own thing. This...doesn't translate well to Christianity and what Christianity is "supposed" to look like, unfortunately, so I constantly felt shame that none of the common advice worked for me when it seemed to work for everyone else. Set a time? Executive dysfunction makes switching tasks hard and once that set time has passed, "well, it's too late now". Having a reading plan? I'd miss a day, fall behind, and the shame at that would keep me from continuing to try. And when I did manage to stay on track, quite often it simply became a box to check off and that was it. So, now, I do what I can, when I can. I always get more out of it, and I think God cares more about that than sticking to a plan just so you can say you read every day anyway.
"Don't script your prayers! They'll become repetitive and you won't think about or mean them!" Oh, boy. Once again, I get the well-intentioned meaning here. You don't want your prayers to become rote and stale. But as someone with high anxiety, scripting them is the only way I can survive praying aloud with other people, and, in fact, it means I put more thought into them, not less! But hearing this kind of advice coupled with an environment where it was implied you had to say 'the right things, the right way' was absolutely detrimental to my prayer life growing up. I was always worried about saying the wrong thing, especially as an undiagnosed autistic who was constantly, ya know, saying the wrong things in conversations with people. So I definitely didn't want to say the wrong things to God! But... I also wasn't allowed to plan what to say? How was I supposed to pray then? So I just. didn't pray. For a very long time. Until I learned its just as perfectly okay to talk to God about whatever crosses your mind while you're standing at the sink doing dishes as it is sitting down with a list of things to focus on. (Not to mention that this really is just...terrible advice in general. Kudos to my pastor, who, in his current Sunday night series on worship, actually gave a tutorial on how to personalize praying the Psalms. So, you know, pre-written prayers.)
Purity Culture. Need I say more? Oh, I could write a whole post about how harmful this is, but plenty of people already have, so I'll leave it at this: I wear what I am comfortable wearing now. Something I love about my church is that our philosophy on modesty is this: The greatest sin of immodesty is saying "look at me" instead of "look at God." In other words, modest isn't about what you're wearing so much as what your attitude about what you're wearing is. If you choose what to wear because you want people to notice and stare and give you compliments, then that is immodest no matter how much of your skin is covered up. It's not immodest to wear clothes you like and that you think are attractive (or that help you look professional when its called for), but ultimately your mindset is really not about "dressing to impress." (There is a very thin line between 'modest' and 'immodest' and its not where most people think it is.)
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txttletale · 1 year ago
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I really agree w/ all your Hades opinions! I played that one first and then went back to all the other SG games, and was surprised at how much better the storytelling was in Transistor and Pyre. Hades is really fun and clearly high quality, but its world and characters feel so much shallower compared to its predecessors, and I really despise Hades himself, so the "reconciliation" stuff falls flat for me. Since you like Pyre, I wondered if you would maybe want to talk about your general feelings on it a little bit--what you like about it, what you don't? It's the least popular of SG's portfolio, which is so sad to me because I think it's the weirdest and most interesting one of the bunch, both story-wise and gameplay-wise (even though my personal fave is Transistor, which is still excellent, I think Pyre does more things I admire).
pyre is one of my favourite games of all time so i would love to talk about it! i mean. where to begin. i love its world. i love the very clever decision to make all the proper nouns and fantasy stuff hoverable hyperlinks so that you, the player, can be filled in on important background information about the world without the need for stilted expository dialogue:
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i love the world of pyre. it's genuinely beautiful, it's my favourite of any of supergiant's worlds: the downside looks genuinely unique, it looks at once forbidding and electrically pretty.
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like god damn. but what i love most about pyre is the story and characters, and how they're both not just communicated to you through the traditional methods this game employs (dialogue, flavour text) but in a way that's woven into the gameplay.
like, pyre isn't a game about fighting, it's a game about sports. it's a very high-stakes sport, but it's a sport -- for those who haven't played it, the plot of pyre is that you and your band of wacky misfits have been banished to a secret underground world. from time to time, the stars align and one person can escape this exile by winning a game of fantasy baskebtall -- and because it's a sport, the game's happy to let you lose. you can lose and that can just be part of the story. on two different occasions, i chose to throw plot-critical matches in pyre--once because an NPC on my team asked me to and once because i felt like the other guys deserved to win more than the protagonists did. and the game treats that as a valid choice, a valid thing to happen in the story! it lets the game explore opportunities and feelings and situations that a more traditional game where the player 'has' to win in the 'canonical' ending isn't capable of and it does it really well
and similarly there's something very very clever done with the character writing. getting to know characters better -- finding out why they were exiled, what's at home that they want to return to, why they want to get back to the surface -- is the same process as improving that character's stats and skills in the basketball games. the result of this is that the characters you know best, the ones you're most emotionally invested in getting to escape exile, are also the ones who you've been relying on to win your basketball games! it's by far the best iteration of the 'switch up your playstyle or else' mechanic that supergiant obsessively puts in their games because it ties directly into the emotional stakes of the story and can make it a genuinely difficult choice to liberate someone who's an essential part of your team but you've just learned has a desperate need to escape before something terrible happens to their loved ones outside.
also its got the best romance route of any supergiant game. i dont give a shit about meg or thanatos when i've got sandra the unseeing
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<3
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creativepromptsforwriting · 2 years ago
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Do you have any tips when it comes to writing a dual timeline?
For example: It's the apocalypse. The first chapter starts in the present. Apocalypse in full swing (like day 238 or smth) and then the next chapter jumps to Day 1 to slowly give a gimplse at what happened. Nad somewhere in the middle the timelines "meet" and its just one timeline
How to write dual timelines
Writing a story with dual timelines means that the story is being told from two different perspectives, each happening at another time. The POV can still come from the same person, but often the timelines are being told from the POV of someone else that has a connection to the other timeline and protagonist. The timelines can be only hours apart (often in crime stories) or hundreds of years apart.
When using your example of a few days apart, I would focus on the commonalities and also the differences that can be seen in just the span of a few weeks. How much has changed and what little things have stayed the same and why?
Both timelines need a reason for being used in the story. This structure needs to add depth to the plot and it can be used to reveal plot twists and overall enhance the narrative.
When talking about structure, the stories with dual timelines are often structured in a way that they jump back and forth between the timelines. You can start off by getting the readers invested in one timeline and then start switching it with the other timeline.
The problem with dual timelines can be that readers are more interested in one timeline then the other. So be careful to give both of them a good enough storyline and purpose for the whole story to be interesting and relevant for the reader.
So, the most important thing to remember is to find a good balance and to connect the timelines well enough that the flow seems seamless and it shows why both of the timelines are needed for the whole story to unfold.
Pro tip: Use some aspects (conflict, interests, worries, places, etc.) that are going on in both stories and when switching to the other timeline, carry whatever the first protagonist was doing or thinking over to the second protagonist.
- Jana
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lewkwoodnco · 1 year ago
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Now That We Don't Talk - Lockwood x Reader
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A/N: very very brief suicidal mention, sooooo much writer's block hhhh (the seasonal depression is depressing), (angst but diluted if that makes sense) add/remove yourself from my taglist in the link beloooow ALSO
🎄Special Announcement! I'll be doing a twelve days of Christmas fic series (1 songfic fic a day leading up to Christmas) BUT I will also be accepting extra holiday-themed requests (if any)!🎄
(speaking of the holidays, thinking of switching to a santa-themed george icon soon hmmm), wc 3.1k
Ch 1 | Ch 2 | Ch 3 | Ch 3.5 | Ch 4 | Ch 5
TAGLIST | MATERLIST
Moving had been a surprisingly smooth process that she remembered little of. She had to take care to not think too much about the ornaments she was packing or the boxes she was taping shut or the lonely town she was numbly driving towards, lest the rest of her catch up to the grief weighing her down. Her supervisor had looked plenty confused when she explained where she was transferring to, and muttered something about not knowing if there were any visitors there.
As steep as the change was from working in central London to a significantly sleepier town, she seemed to be adjusting fine. In fact, she was liking the peace and quiet. Or at least, she would, soon enough. She'd learn the right habits, like finding contentment in the stagnant void that descended on her windows far too quickly every evening, the same way she'd unlearn bad habits, like him. So no, her biggest problem was hardly the early sunsets here, but was actually what everyone wanted to talk to her about when she called. The one thing everyone - her old teammates, colleagues, friends - wanted to make sure she knew.
"The gala was fantastic this year - though not as fun without you, of course -"
"You'll never believe who showed up."
"He looked very sharp in his suit. He cleans up nice, I suppose - Anthony Lockwood, I mean."
"They've become quite the celebrities, that Lockwood & Co., though the other two don't seem to tolerate the cameras like he does."
"Oh, you should have seen it. Say what you will about Lockwood but does he know how to make an entrance!"
"Were you at the gala this year?"
She sighed for what must have been the fifth time that day. "No, Ted, I was not. You were at my farewell party, remember?"
"Tha' was for you?"
"Goodbye, Ted."
"Wait! You've seen the pictures, haven't you?"
"No, I haven't, because contrary to popular belief, I am not obsessed with evrything that goes on at Fittes."
"Well, we had a tiptop chocolate fountain this year. Didn't get clogged once and looked absolutely gorgeous. Anywho, I've recently stumbled upon this smashing business opportunity involving chocolate fountains - they're selling like hot cakes, I tell you! - and I'd love to spread the wealth."
"Theodore, you haven't joined another MLM, have you?"
"What is an MLM, other than an opportunity to invest in yourself?"
"Don't make me phone your mother."
The call ended rather abruptly after that. Only Lucy, as always, was an angel.
"I take it you've heard plenty about him?"
"Who? Oh, him. Yes, more than plenty."
"I thought you might. He has...quite the presence, so the papers wanted to interview him, and he agreed - "
" - obviously - "
"And I think they asked him about you at some point."
Her mouth dried. She struggled to find her voice, forcing it to stay casually disinterested. "Hm? What did he say?"
"Absolutely nothing. First and probably last time I've seen him stunned speechless. Naturally, it's all anyone can talk about."
"Mhm."
"He hasn't talked about you, if you're wondering. Sees it coming from a mile away every time George and I try to bring it up. It's so stupid; we know it, he knows it, and he's always in a foul mood. He keeps thinking, these days...Y/N?"
"I don't care."
"No one would blame you if you did."
"I don't."
"So how are you holding up?"
"Well, Luce, I felt happiness outside of external validation for the first time in...ever, then three months later I'm crying in my bathtub wishing I would die, and now I'm miles away from everyone I ever knew and it's always dark outside and I'm always miserable. I'm doing great."
She could hear the exhaustion in the crackling static of the telephone. It occurred to her that she wasn't much acting all that cheerful either.
"If it makes you feel any better, I think he half-expected to see you there."
She inhaled sharply and sat up in her armchair so fast she could feel a cramp curling in her neck. She didn't dare believe Lucy's words. "Really?" she wanted to breathe into the telephone, and revel in dormant delusions, if only for a moment. Instead, she gingerly sank back into the chair, continuing in a flat voice.
"Well, I don't care about any of that now. Oh, I'm sick of it. All of it. If I never hear his name again for as long as I live, it'll be still be too soon. How's George doing?"
After she hung up, she laid in her chair, watching the shadows from her shutters stretch and fold over her furniture as the sun set. She was thinking about the last party she had been to, a yacht party where some of Fittes' and Rotwell's biggest investors were in attendance. How Lockwood had managed to score an invite was beyond her, but what intrigued her more was the cab ride they shared back to Portland Row.
She had been half-dozing off when she felt a hand cover hers. As she blinked at him blearily, she noticed the rigid tension in his spine, as if poised and waiting for an attack. He was clutching her hand purposefully, as if holding off on warning her about something malevolent that was consuming him. She couldn't see his face, which began to feel no different from the cold, hard window pane it was peering out of.
She stirred, distantly unnerved by his impersonality. He glanced at her, apologetically retracting his hand with a sheepish smile. But that look of consternation remained on his face as he turned back to the window with a furrowed brow, with the air of waiting for something. He visibly relaxed as they approached Portland Row, but she couldn't shake off the uneasy feeling even by the time they reached the doorstep.
"You all right?" she was asking, while Lockwood fumbled with their keys.
"'Course. Why wouldn't I be?"
She didn't respond, and the two of them watched him wrench at the key in the lock, trying to steady his mildly trembling fingers.
"Key turns the other way."
He paused his efforts, and after a second or two turned the key the other way. The door slid open smoothly with a click. He held it open, but she just looked at him expectantly. He sighed.
"I'm fine, I promise. I just...get a little nervous around some parts of London."
"Which parts?"
"Some."
"Scared of what?"
"A few things."
"Why?"
"For fun. Look, I'm freezing out here. Can we just drop this?"
That was more than a mild exaggeration; the sun had only just set and the air was still pleasantly balmy. But he looked so beseechingly, and it didn't take much for her to relent when it came to Lockwood, so they stepped inside and shrugged their coats off in silence.
"I'll tell you some day. I'm sure I will."
That was some day too far away. Now she'll never know if, or why he ever felt like that. Or rather, she wouldn't know when he would feel like that. But it was no matter. It was none of her business then, and it was even less of her business now.
She had mostly forgotten about her conversation with Lucy by the following week, which was why her parcel came as a bit of a surprise, especially since she'd mentioned being swamped by a mountain of upcoming cases.
Y/N -
I was thinking about our call the other day. On a completely unrelated note, here's about every gossip rag from the past month I could find at Arif's.
Love, Lucy.
She was beginning to see what was so appealing about these magazines. As ruthless as they could be, they sure knew how to sell a pipe dream to common folk with less exciting lives. The gala was clearly as glitzy and glamorous as it was every year, and the articles held an air of intrigue now that she was quite separate from Fittes. But that quivering excitement became somewhat muffled as she flipped through the glossy pages.
The Anthony Lockwood she saw now looked worlds apart from the Lockwood she left behind. His well-fitting suit, megawatt smile and carefully styled hair made him look expensive in a way that destabilised her. She flipped through photograph after photograph of him looking jarringly luxurious besides walls of text effusing about the success of their latest case, and what an honour it must have been to be personally invited by Marissa Fittes herself. It weighed at the pit in her stomach to see this unfamiliar silhouette of a friend who was become increasingly unattainable, speeding along roads to prosperity faster than she could ever keep up with.
She sifted through the other rags. The most extensive feature was a few pages long, and was centered more on the exciting, up-and-coming agency that was Lockwood & Co. rather than a specific case. There were pictures from their most recent cases, and in each one he looked unnaturally distinct from the last, but in every single one he oozed an appealingly languid charisma. It was good to see him doing so well. She was happy for him. Or she would be, tomorrow, when she had the strength for it. Lockwood was unbearable in a way that made him perfect for a life in the public eye, a life for which she was somehow always deficient. She traced a too-long strand of hair flopped on his forehead in one of the photographs, as if she could magically straighten it out.
She could see him now, thumbing through the pages with an approving tilt to his head, limbs folded uncomfortably in the armchair he always insisted on sharing with her. "No such thing as bad press," he'd claim absent-mindedly, his too-long hair flopping impractically. And she'd watch him with bruised eyes like she always did, wishing for nothing more in that moment shared with him. In other words, wishing for nothing short of what she could never have.
Maybe it was some lingering wish to break herself before he beat her to it. Because that was all it was; dodging blows, lying through pretty teeth, racing ahead to pull one over on him, cursing the feel of his breath on her. There was simply no calm, no respite, only the all-consuming experience of becoming wrapped up in him and losing bits and pieces of herself which would never again be truly hers.
She picked up the telephone again. It felt too heavy in her hand. Numbly, she spun the dial as if on autopilot, keying in her mother's phone number. The dial tone comforted her in some twisted yet cathartic acknowledgement of the emptiness inside of her.
Looking at it now she could see the distinct air of mystery that engulfed Lockwood and clouded her vision. He was never quite fully present; a part of him was always tucked away to be kept secret in some dark corner, and her mind was only too happy to extrapolate, to construct this most desirable yet entirely mythical figment. She felt ragged, winded and worn from battling reality day after day, all alone. And most of all, she felt so very stupid.
Her mother was saying that she had made the right decision. Not that she needed any reminding. Of course her life had taken an upward swing ever since; she'd be a fool to think otherwise. She was positively paralysed with liberty, bedridden with joy, simply immobile with ecstasy!
She was slowly but surely going very insane. Now making eyes at each other, now disconnect, now love, now heartache, now this, now that, but never any peace. Maybe it was some lingering wish to shatter and let the pent up misery dissipate.
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Months passed. The holiday season arrived, and she choked through the November blues with shivering bones and clammy hands. Even with the slight uptick in visitors, as was expected in the colder months, her life provided little to distract her from her own ghosts under the floorboards. So when she received a consultancy request from Fittes one morning, she had written back and mailed her response all while still holding the jam knife.
The train was crowded and noisy with the bustle of the holidays, but as it chugged along through the fields of snow, she couldn't help but perk up ever so slightly at every sigh and creak of its wheels. There was a spring in her step all the way to Fittes headquarters, where she was supposed to collect her apartment key.
A tall, indistinct figure was walking out of the revolving doors as she approached. She flinched when she realised who it was - Lockwood, who didn't seem much happier to see her either. He looked mostly well, though the corners of his mouth were a little strained, his face flushed in the cold.
"...Y/N?"
"Lockwood."
"You're...home?"
"Yeah. Um, how have you been?"
"Good...good. Busy. As busy as winter gets."
He was wearing a different coat. It was quite similar to his old one, but this one was thicker and more structured, and looked like it was at least somewhat effective in keeping the brisk winter wind out. He looked foreign and unfamiliar in a way he hadn't since...since the Investors Party.
It had taken her a while to pick his face out of the pretentious crowd, given how preoccupied she was with weaving through the thicket of people. It had taken her a eyes minute to adjust to the almost nauseatingly charismatic silhouette of an especially-chuffed Lockwood in a newly tailored but otherwise identical suit. She tried to give him a reproaching look, but there was something infectious in his smooth ease as he larked about in his prime which made her lips twitch despite herself as he waded through the crowds.
"You really shouldn't be here."
"You're clearly not drunk enough yet."
"How did you even get in? This is invitation-only."
"Had an invite, didn't I?"
She pursed her lips, shaking her head slightly. He was hopelessly incorrigible in an oddly fascinating way. Her voice dropped to a murmur as she felt herself begin to relent.
"I ought to...tell someone about you."
"That you're secretly in love with me?"
"That we have an illegal stowaway."
"You're not going to rat me out, are you?"
The pleading look on his face was enough to give her pause. She was already beginning to regret her decision, but he looked so vivacious it was difficult to stay disapproving for long.
"Excellent. Now, would you be so good as to point me in the direction of the bigger spenders?"
They spend the next few hours laughing and entertaining the many important men on the boat and their great deal of important thoughts. She'd excuse herself towards the end of every conversation to leave Lockwood and the glimmer in his eye to close a deal. For someone so adept at climbing the corporate ladder, she was surprisingly poor at fulfilling these adjacent duties.
She hated every second of it, and she drank as much as she could without raising eyebrows to make it all halfway palatable, but it was all worth it then. He had wanted to stay for as long as it would have been polite, so when they finally left, long after the media had made their rounds at the event, his jacket was folded over his left arm and his hand was delicately holding hers.
When she was stuck in her drafty cottage on the edge of nowhere, she'd think about the feel of his fingers curling around her palm more than it was appropriate, and wonder how she ever thought she was somehow better off here.
But that evening's sense of camraderie was long gone. Now, she regarded him coolly, holding him at arm's length. They may have had a rough falling out, but that didn't mean they couldn't still be friends. Just friends. Nothing more. But the vaguely intimate look in Lockwood's eye told her he was in no mood to entertain any kind of platonic notions.
"I didn't know you were back."
She relented. It was the season of giving, after all.
"Only for a while. Fittes hired me as a consultant for a few months."
He blinked at her. "You could have called."
"I didn't think you'd be interested."
"Of course I'd be interested. I'm always interested when it comes to you."
She sighed sharply. It was so easy to get swept up and believe him when he said things like that, that she wondered how she found the strength to leave. He was a bastard, a ne'er-do-well who only knew how to break her heart after promising sweet, simple luxuries in whispers over expanses of skin. She made her lips tremble, her pulse quicken, her heart shake in all the worst ways.
But underneath all that, love was there. Love was there...still.
"Ready to go?"
They turned in unison towards a strikingly beautiful girl with glossy raven curls walking out of the revolving doors. The girl's smile only slipped a fraction as she shook her hand, and she was distantly aware of making some kind of clumsy introduction. They stuttered through some stunted small talk, during which all she was aware of was the blood roaring in her ears that gave the whole scene a distantly muffled feel. Stupid, stupid, stupid.
"Well, this was...lovely. Shall we go, then?"
The girl turned to leave, but some semblance of hesitation prevented her from pulling Lockwood along with her.. His face still had that same confused look.
"You could have called," he repeated tonelessly, like a broken record. The girl's presence made the back of her neck smart and prickle uncomfortably.
"I might, later."
"Bye. Nice meeting you."
"Nice meeting you too."
"We're home all day."
The last one was from Lockwood.
"Just...if you want to drop by. So that Luce and George don't have my head on a platter by supper."
"Goodbye, Lockwood."
He was captivating in a way that made her want to keep him all to herself. No one needed to intrude on this tantalising secret they shared. It was at that moment that she made the very unfortunate realisation that she didn't need to say it out loud to make what she had been screaming from the rooftops of her heart any more real - him and her would forever be unfinished business.
And nothing she could do could make the palpitations of her heart any less real either.
As the life she once dreamed of walked away from her, all she was acutely aware of was that it was a lingering wish, some half-thought dream, to sit opposite him in a chilly kitchen on blustery mornings, watching him drink his tea while she got drunk on him.
TAGLIST: @novelizt @avdiobliss @dangelnleif @mischivana @mitskiswift99 @houseoftwistedspirits
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adoroborosgoth · 11 months ago
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Crowley dying in s3
I wasn't sure how to start this meta. I've had this theory with possible (big possible) evidence sitting around for ages and I just didn't know what to do with the information.
After I'd already had this information, I only seen a hand full of others talk about it, but none have touched on it in the same way as the things I've found in my research.
So let's get on with it. For reference I'm going to tag @nightingalecottage and their lovely post here. I really recommend reading it. This theory only saw the light of day because of their post and I told them I would tag them with my meta since it lends a lot to it. And I promised myself that I would finish this for them.
Now for the meat and potatoes. I'll break it all down about how I found this information and how it might lend some theory about possible plot to s3.
This got really long so I put a cut.
-Silly narrator voice-
The facts were these.
To start I was doing research for a fic I'm working on and the details don't matter much but I'd planned to make my 'human' crowley a barrister. I was googling famous barristers for inspiration.
This lead me to wikipedia naturally as you do. And as I was looking over the list I saw this.
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After seeing this name on the list of barristers in popular culture I had a mini freakout. Mainly because two things NG is a huge fan of Charles Dickens and A Tale of Two Cities is on the bookclub reading list. And I kept thinking why did this seem familiar and this is why.
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A Tale of Two Cities is on the list of books that they recommend we read or were found in s2. So after I stopped freaking out I immediately went to the wiki page for this character. I wasn't too familiar with this book so I wanted to know more. As I was now super invested and intrigued. And found this.
Sydney Carton
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I couldn't help be blown away by the similarities here between Sydney Carton and a certain depressed snake demon from s2. Morosely asking Shax on a bench in the first episode "What's the point of it all?"
For some context, in the novel Sydney Carton and his later best friend Charles Darnay share a striking semblance and are easily mistaken for each other. This is how Sydney is then able to make the switch with Darnay in the end saving his life.
This brings to mind of the lore that we know that Crowley and Aziraphale were once long ago one character and split into two. Also with the ideal casting choice that Terry Pratchett wanted one actor to play both roles. That would have been really interesting and funny. Also this plays into our favorite duo MS and DT having not worked together before because they were up for the same roles.
Let's move on to
Charles Darnay
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Darnay resents his uncle's views much how Aziraphale resents certain aspects of heaven, but is never able to act on very much.
The note about Darnay being tutor of French made me chuckle considering what we know about Aziraphale being terrible at French. With that whole scene centered around it in s2.
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Ok so we all are well versed and familiar with the famous Bastille scene. We all know the one and its clear the inspiration here for it comes from A Tale of Two Cities possibly.
Side note Darnay and Carton are both in love with Lucie here, but I posit that in the case of Good omens, Aziraphale is possibly both Darnay and Lucie. Making him the best friend and love intrest.
Lucie Manette
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And finally why does any of this matter and what does this have to do with Crowley maybe dying in s3 you ask?
The one important detail in all of this is that at the end of the novel Carton heroically sacrificed himself to save his best friend and for the women he loves. He feels it gave him purpose and felt as if his life finally had meaning.
Two things here. The scene in which Carton swaps places with Darnay being able to pass as him well enough to save his life. Is very reminiscent of our Body Swap from s1. As well as the idea that in s3 this could also happen, but in the sense that Crowley does it to save Aziraphale's life. I clearly have no idea how s3 will play out.
Now I'm not saying that s3 will be as dramatic as all of this. It is still a comedy at its core. As others have touched on in meta and in nightingalecottage's post there are many little hints that point to the similarities and the idea that Crowley maybe doomed by the narrative. In a way, I personally don't think that Crowley's hypothetical death will be permanent. I just do not see that happening at all. A temporary death I could definitely see and it could also serve to show how much Crowley truly means to Aziraphale. The shock of it would maybe be similar to how Crowley thought he lost Aziraphale in s1 and could be a parallel.
In the end this is all speculation and theory. Either way the idea of it all makes me vibrate and I needed to finally share this with someone else. They wouldn't have recommended this book if there wasn't some sort of meaning here right? And its entirely possible I'm looking in the wrong direction.
Overall there are many parallels and similarities here between A Tale of Two Cities and certain parts of Good Omens, I'm sure I may have missed some and I just wanted to end this now before it gets too long. If you made it this far and have any other theories or something you want to add on to this please feel free to tag me. I release this into the void.
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esoteric-chaos · 8 months ago
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Disability-Friendly Prosperity Magic
So let's face it, those who are disabled have a hard time with money in general, either from being unable to work or not having a steady, strong source of income. Sometimes we can monetize our hobbies, admittedly at a limited capacity (some less or more than others).
From our relationship with money, money mindsets, and income streams, it's hard. That's not to shame anyone, either. Some overspend to cope, while others are incredibly frugal.
In this post, I will review some resources, tips, and tricks for the struggling disabled witch.
The Mundane Before Magical
Step one is to make a budget and track your expenses. I'm serious. Sit down, look at where your money is going, and decide on a budget that you can realistically stick to. I use the 50/30/20 rule as a budget, which is 50% Needs, 30% Wants, and 20% Savings. However, I recently switched wants and savings around so I can save for a trip.
Now I do not want you to worry about a big fancy budget method. I don't want you to overthink it. Here is a resource (Canada, but it can be used in the USA) to start one. Focus on your needs like housing, utilities, basic clothing, food, etc. Then go into wants and entertainment, and finally, savings. I suggest you put any debt payoff into the needs category if you have any debt. You do not want a blow to your credit report.
Now do you have any financial goals? Going back to school? Debt payoff? A trip? Even a big medical trip coming up? Here is a resource (Canada, but it can be used in the USA) that can help you create a goal and a plan to pay this off.
Savings, please, your SAVINGS. It is vital to have an emergency fund. Job loss? Death? Vet bills? Children? Dentist? You better believe that piles up. It is recommended if you are single to have at least 3 months of income saved up, with a child and single at least 6 months. Married on two incomes, the same amount. Married with one income, it is recommended without children at least 6 months saved up and with children 9 months. It is vital you have the means to take care of yourself if an emergency strikes. It is never recommended that money be stopped from being put into these accounts.
If you are in debt, look at your debt relief options. Sometimes there are services out there that can advocate for you regarding debt. They will help you develop a plan, understand the relief options, sign documents with you, and develop a credit rebuilding program. These services are out there; even if they are paid, they can help you pay off some of your debt, especially credit card debt.
Educate yourself on investing, basic investing, and financial literacy, in stock markets and everything beyond. Know what kind of accounts you can hold and what could help you in your situation.
Need help applying for disability? Here's a resource for the USA (a lot can also be used for Canada).
The Magical
Upkeep a prosperity altar. Work with the spirit of money like you would any other spirit. Honour it, talk to it, venerate it. Money loves to be valued, moved, not wasted, and used in charity. Most importantly, money takes time. Money takes time to grow and build a relationship with.
This is the most important thing I've learned about money. It wants to be worked with. It's sitting there. It wants to help and aid you in ways that you need.
Work with this altar on Thursdays, incorporating the spirit of Jupiter. Jupiter rules over finances. Long steady finances, not quick finances. Jupiter rules over business, legal and all things finances. Jupiter is a slower-moving planet.
You can also incorporate the spirit of Mercury on Wednesdays along with your Jupiter workings. Mercury is a fast-moving planet, a planet for fast-moving money. However, you must build a long, steady form of finances over quick, easy cash (but sometimes you do need it right now).
You can create a money bowl and work with it on this altar, a Jupiter cashbox (I will make a future post on this), or a manifestation mirror box filled with petitions, sigils and your investment/banking information.
Fill your altar with greens and gold, imagery for wealth and abundance, pocket change, and anything else that symbolizes wealth.
Do not forget to leave offerings for your money altar. A simple glass of water can do but try to do more if you can.
Road opener workings or petition with an offering for the cross-road spirits who can unblock blockages in your way.
Final Take Away
I know this might not help everyone, but I sincerely hope this helps somebody. Financial literacy was not taught to everyone, nor were proper budgeting tips. I wanted to share what I've learned over the years as I believe it is vital information for some of the information I have collected.
Blessings
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hinamie · 4 months ago
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do u have any tips for uhh idk art term....highlight and contour but for art? specifically w digital art? w pencil and paper it feels super intuitive but then when i switch to digital it looks all flat.............
(is it shading? idk what im doing tbsh)
(also hope ur doing well i feel like im crawling into ur asks every two days or smth looking for art tips sorry T_T)
(yuuji comic made me cry so hard btw)
hi rin!!!!!!! that wld be shading/rendering yes hgbhgfjs there’s no One specific term tho so ur all good <3 also omg re: the yuuji comic IM SORRY I KEEP MAKING U CRY GHJKGJDSGHKJ its ok i made a lot of people cry if the death wishes/pos in the tags are anything 2 go by so ur in good company :D i teared up also
i would Also like to apologize in advance because fr me this is one of those Art Things that becomes more intuitive the more u do it so i am a bit. lost as 2 how to explain but i will sukuna voice ganbare ganbare !!!!
it’s all about light sources babes so pick a direction where the light is hitting from and use that as your main point of reference. If u need to remind yourself where the light is coming from i was taught to draw a lil arrow or sun somewhere on your canvas 2 keep track . areas closest to the light or planes that are more Elevated will be brighter than areas farther away or Deeper. When u think of a face, the forehead and cheeks rest Higher than fr example, the eye sockets, so those areas will catch more light and appear brighter. it /is/ kind of like makeup in that way. 
also, shadows/highlights can have soft or hard edges depending on how . uh . intense, i guess?? the angle of the light is. like with a box vs a sphere, the former will have a lot more Cut and Defined areas of darkness because the plane where light hits is cut off more directly by the presence of a corner, whereas with a sphere the Slope means that the values follow more of a gradient. 
tbh tho if you’re still starting out, to practice light sources and shading it actually might be good to scribble and shade some 3D shapes and spheres/boxes or maybe even draw from life so u can really take time 2 pay attn to how light catches different surfaces . it’s boring work but the practice is never wasted !! lighting can be tricky so try and take the time 2 form Good habits :'> references r ur friends here now more than ever.
other than that, which i feel more or less covers the basics n fundamentals, my wisdoms 2 u and any1 else who will have it: INVEST TIME IN2 FINDING GOOD BRUSHES omg i feel like a lot of that New Artist Look (tm) comes from using default brushes —which on its own is fine, but the kicker is not taking time to get comfortable with how to make the best use of them. the fun of the render is getting to play with textures and colours so find some brush settings that help add a bit of personality!! also . resist defaulting 2 the airbrush tool to shade it Rarely cooperates and can muddy a piece. uhhhh what else what else try not to shade with black for the same reasons ???? i'm scraping the bottom of the barrel here but i hope something here was of any value :'>>
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miraculouslbcnreactions · 1 year ago
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We're finally at the final (thank the gods)! Things that we talked about that I haven't seen discussed:
Nathalie trying to kill Gabriel is such bullshit. "You can't do this! You'll hurt someone!" Nathalie, you have known that since day one! You knew he was working on this all season and you're good now! Why are you only trying to kill him now? You were healthy most of the season! You even physically pinned him! Oh, right, because you're not actually good. It's all just "better than thou" lip service. Hypocrisy is the easiest way to make us dislike a character and Nathalie's a massive hypocrite, so we're not fans.
Evil Nathalie was pretty fun. "Good" Nathalie is aggravating and has as lackluster a redemption as they gave Felix or perhaps even more lackluster. Felix at least switched for love of Kagami. Nathalie switched because Gabriel didn't heal her even though she had zero knowledge that he truly had a chance to do so (she wasn't there and Gabriel has never given up an opportunity to save Emilie so that he could chase Ladybug before). Adrien was never Nathalie's motivation or else we would have seen her protest things like Gorizilla, Style Queen, and Chat Blanc.
Moving on!
The mass teleport to Ladybug should have killed everyone because the whole world is supposed to be after her. A couple billion people teleporting to the same location should mean people squish each other or that portals open over each other/on top of people. Just saying. Budget saved her life because Mirauclous' Earth has a teeny tiny population due to rendering costs.
SO was mad how anticlimactic the final fight between Marinette and Gabe feels. Oh two people who barely interacted, have minimal personal connection, and always hated each other are fighting? Such a big moment! I'm so invested! He talked about how other shows build up to moments like this by making the villain terrifying or by making the villain and the hero have a strong, personal connection or even by making the fight super fun to watch, but miraculous did none of that. SO seriously didn't care about the fight at all and, to be honest, neither did I when I first watched it. I only tuned in when Marinette detransformed and I went, wait, wtf are you doing?
We get to all the scenes with heroes in other locations and SO paused the show every few seconds to ask me who tf person X was. Fei resulted in multiple pauses because of her varied forms. So I can confirm that the casual viewer totally followed this part and it was a wonderful addition (that's sarcasm, btw). He did ask "why would the French say that they need a bunch of Americans to win?" Which I though was pretty funny. That's certainly one way to read the Americans showing up!
SO works in IT. He was so mad that the laptop wasn't remotely wiped after it was lost/Lila stole it. And why does it have access to the Agreste mansion and not just the police robots? I thought Tsurugi corp was a tech company? This is all security 101.
SO's final thoughts: well that was soulless. I feel nothing. I can see why you're so done with this show.
Credit where it's due: while the final was massively disappointing from a story perspective and while I don't think Caline Bustier was written like a good teacher for anyone above the age of 5, it is really cool to show a pregnant woman run for office, win, and then be allowed to do her job with her baby in tow without any of that being treated as a joke. That's a really powerful thing for a young child to see and I'm glad it was included even Caline would make a terrible mayor in real life.
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otomegamesandme · 2 months ago
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It's been a hot minute since I've done a recommendation post but I am suddenly in the mood for another one! This one for otome/amare games with fall vibes! Some of these are demos, most are complete! Also if you have any requests, feel free to send an ask.
Let's get started!
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7'Scarlet
System: PS Vita, PC (steam), Switch edition coming in 2025
This game takes place over summer vacation, but it's also a horror which makes me want to place it here! It's also the only game on this list that isn't an indie title. Follow Ichiko as she ventures into a strange small town in search of her missing brother.
I'm going to be honest, my favorite part of this game is the art/design. The moving backgrounds are super pretty and all the color choices are really nice. Toa's also a sweetheart, and he made the whole game worth it. I know the PC port isn't great, but thankfully Aksys is bringing over the switch version in 2025 if you feel like waiting for that!
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Titan Arum
System: PC (itch.io)
You're a writer whose moved back into your old childhood home. Attempt to finish your novel and not lose your mind.
Honestly, one of my favorite indie otomes I've played. I love the art, the atmosphere, and where the game pulls inspiration from. The UI design is also gorgeous and one of my favorites to date. The three LIs are all very fun and distinct from each other, and seeing how the story unfolds in each of their paths was fun to discovery.
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Under Your Moon
System: PC (itch.io)
You're in a world where everyone has disappeared except for you. You've been alone for a long time now, until suddenly you're not alone. And this stranger might just hold the answer to why everyone in your world has all but vanished.
Is it cheating to do two games from (roughly) the same team? Maybe, but this and Titan Arum are so good and I feel like after Titan Arum, all their newer releases don't get talked about as much? The atmosphere and slow creeping dread this game has is incredible, and I was so invested in it.
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X-note
System: PC (steam and itch.io)
My first otome I played and loved back in the olden days of 2011. I still come back to replay it and it still has a special place in my heart. A mystery otome about a psychic girl whose approached to help solve a series of murders. The atmosphere in this was great, and I love the main character Eri a lot as well as the love interests. It veers more into being sad then anything, and if you want that kind of vibe I highly recommend.
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Halloween Otome
System: PC (itch.io)
And finally we got a light-hearted entry! You get invited to a masquerade challenge where you have to stay in your Halloween costume and not have your identity revealed for two weeks, all while completing various challenges.
This feels like an indie otome classic, and the whole series just feels like comfort food? I have a soft spot for it after all these years, and I've personally been meaning to replay myself soon!
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Delphine's Discovery
System: PC (itch.io)
Delphine is a streamer who, in an attempt to save her family business, goes to investigate an old orphanage. There she meets a strange man and finds herself potentially stumbling upon a murder mystery instead. This was another game that just felt really nice and relaxing to play in the moment.
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ITYH
System: PC (itch.io)
Camille wants Osgoode to notice her, and when he does, everything goes wrong.
This is where we get into more severe horror themes, and I don't recommend this for everyone. With that said, I loved how absolutely wild the plot got and where some of the endings went. It felt like a fever dream, especially on top of all the awful things that happen leading up to the endings. It's such a ride, and it's definitely one of those games I still think about from time to time.
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Memory Ghosts
LOL gotta showcase my game somewhere-
System: PC (itch.io)
This follows Clara as she starts community college and joins a paranormal club on campus with her childhood best friend. The paranormal club as an interest in the old humanities building Mariposa del Sol, and whatever seems to be haunting the building seems to have an interest in her.
This was the first game I ever made and released and while I've definitely improved since its release, I have a soft spot for it! It only takes about 3 or 4 hours to play through every route, so if you want something to kill time, check it out!
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nightyslibrary · 1 year ago
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(A Short Fic About) A Normal Day With Your Double Mutated Brother
☆ Fandom: rottmnt (au by @heckitall )
☆ Warnings: Nothing!! Just fluff and the boys being silly :]
☆ Word Count: 1432
☆ AO3 Link: N/A
☆ Characters: Leo, Donnie, Mikey
Uhh so I might have written something inspired by Heckl's comics and drawings :] go check his comics/artwork out!! Hope you like it (and happy birthday!!) (Also if there is any mistake... well, lets say its because it is 1 am)
 When it came to playing video games the twins would always end up getting too invested in it, which either would turn up to them fixating on the game for hours or fighting over who could beat it in “the right way”. Even when the games were two player ones, they’d still do the same thing.
 Not so surprisingly, this didn’t change even when Donnie became twice his size. Instead now the boys were sitting in Leo’s room, Leo laying his back on Donnie and playing the new the Legend of Zelda game on their switch. Donnie was watching the screen with joy, his tail wagging, and at times chirping to Leo.
 “See? I can do the puzzles quite well.” Leo said without looking away from the screen. “I had told you.”
 Donnie chirped as a response, as if making fun of Leo.
 Leo turned to him, “Just because I got stuck it doesn’t mean I am not good with them. Now let’s go back to the depths, since somebody thinks I can’t handle it.”
 The double mutated turtle smirked, making turtle sounds, before noticing something on the screen and pointing.
 “Wha- oh shi--!” He yelped as he moved with Donnie’s arms holding him, making various sounds in the meantime. As Leo turned back his attention to the game, bleeping as he continued playing it with Donnie commenting at times once again. Just like before Donnie’s situation, as if nothing had changed. Everybody in the lair would agree this was nice.
 Neither of them was sure how long had passed when Mikey entered with a smile on his face. “Are you two still playing Tears of the Kingdom?” He asked as he approached them.
 “Yep.” Leo replied.
 “It’s been five hours.” Mikey said.
 “Uh-huh.”
 “Which means nobody would say anything if I interrupted you for very important reasons.” He grinned.
 “Wrong.” Leo responded.
 “Don’t think Raphie or dad would agree.” Mikey said, knowing very well that he was right and the two would hear about how they shouldn’t sit down and play video games, forgetting to take care of themselves such as eating. Not to mention how Raph would take this to his advantage and get the switch for himself, not letting Leo play for the rest of the day.
 The slider sighed and starred at his younger brother, knowing very well that Mikey had won. He saved his game and put the switch aside. Meanwhile, Donnie huffed from behind. “Soooo tell us about whatever that is very important?” Leo asked as he got up.
 “I was thinking about how long the lair has been the same, and about how nice it would be to redecorate it.” Mikey explained.
 “You’re the artist Mike, not us.” Leo pointed out.
 “Weeeellll, I wasn’t only thinking about art. Remember the Christmas lights?”
 Leo squinted at Mikey. “You want to decorate the lair with Christmas lights.”
 “Yes!”
 “In August.”
 “Yeah!”
 “…”
 “…”
 “You’ll ignore Halloween?!” Leo gasped, a bit dramatically.
 “We can have Halloween later on!” Mikey retorted. “I just want to have some bright lights around, and maybe a few other new stuffs. A colorful lair wouldn’t hurt anyone, instead it would bring joy! Also, it is for art and creativity!”
 “So, you mean you want to,” Leo snickered, and his brothers knew what was coming. “Lighten up the mood.”
 Mikey groaned, while Donnie growled, both hating the pun. Leo giggled at his own joke, proud of it.
 “Ignoring Leo’s terrible pun for my sanity, all I am saying is it would be nice if you could help.” The youngest said.
 “Eh, sure.” Leo shrugged, not that he could say no. Donnie got on his feet too, careful to not accidentally knock anything down. He was still getting used to his new size.
 With Mikey’s lead they walked out, heading to where Mikey already had the boxes filled with Christmas lights. “We can start from here, and then move to the living room. Leo, can you get the lower parts done?”
 “Call it done already.” The slider winked as he walked towards a box.
 Mikey joined him, grabbing lights from a different box, “Donnie can you help me? I need to reach the higher parts.”
 Donnie chirped as he leaned for Mikey to climb on his shoulders, just like how he did with Raph. He carefully climbed and then patted Donnie’s shoulder to confirm he was ready. Donnie churred happily, he stood up again.
 So, they began redecorating the lair with the lights, leaving some walls empty so Mikey could draw on them. In the meantime, they chatted, talking about various things and unimportant stuff. Filling the silence with happy chatter. Mikey would talk about his next art projects, then mention something that inspirited him, Leo would ask about it, and the conversation would go on.
 It was just like every single time they spent time together, yet it was everything Donnie could ask for. The chatter of his brothers, Mikey’s unexpected ideas, Leo’s dumdum jokes… It was comforting for him.
 So, comforting that---
 CHURRR
 Leo and Mikey stopped talking, looking at Donnie with surprise and glee. Donnie confusedly looked Leo and then at Mikey. As silence was the only answer, Donnie realized what he just had done. His brothers’ exclamation confirmed his fear:
 “OH MY GOSH!!!” Mikey grinned as he jumped down to see Donnie better. “DID YOU DO THAT?!”
 “DID YOU JUST CHURR?!” Leo wheezed.
 Donnie chirped a lot, trying his best in his situation. It didn’t help that Leo kept laughing, and Mikey kept saying he sounded like a happy cat. Maybe if Donnie was his not double mutated self, he would’ve acted cooler and kept calm. But he was not and all he could do chirping. Which frustrated him even more, resulting him running out of the room.
 Leo and Mikey were quick to follow him.
 Donnie had lay under a pile of clothes, most of them being his hoodies and some of Raph’s sweaters that Raph had helped him wear (and later Donnie hadn’t let Raph get them back) in his room. His tail was visible, wagging angrily.  
 The two brothers approached carefully, not to startle him. Mikey looked at Leo, unsure what to do or say. He was feeling a bit bad for Donnie, but he still couldn’t help thinking that he behaved like a cat. Leo wasn’t feeling much different. He knew that he shouldn’t have laughed that much, while Donnie was still upset with his double this whole situation.
 Leo was first to speak, “Uh hey Dee, mind if we join you?”
 A growl.
 “Aww come on, we got something to show you.” He said cheerfully, Mikey looked at him confusedly. The slider winked at him, meaning he had a plan.
 Donnie didn’t leave the pile, but got his head out of it, enough to be able to see them. Leo grinned, and then chirped. Donnie’s eyes widened, surprised, and confused.
 “I thought you had stopped doing it and were unable to anymore.” Mikey squinted at Leo.
 “Well, maybe Donnie’s chirping has helped me figure it out, couldn’t it be?” He spoke.
 Before Mikey could say anything and tell his disbelief, Donnie chirped.
 Leo turned his attention back to him, “I have absolutely no idea what I am saying though, but- chirp!”
 “Are you sure about not knowing what you’re saying?” Mikey questioned.
 “Chiirp.” Leo smirked.
 This seemed to lift Donnie’s mood a bit though. His tail was wagging in the happy way, and he began chirping again. Mikey joined too, since he never had hidden the fact that he still could chirp. Soon the room was filled with chirping of every sort, and the snickering of Mikey and Leo among them at times when one of them made a funny sounding one.
 As the boys' conversation changed with the passing time, Leo turned to Mikey. "About the Christmas lights... you're definitely up to something." He said. "Could it be a prank against Raph?"
 "Please, I would never." Mikey responded, obviously guilty. He didn't need to say it to confirm Leo's guess when he happily stimmed the way he'd do when he was excited for something.
 "Get ready for a surprised Raph yelp, Dee." Leo looked at the clock on his phone. Then looked at Donnie. "He'd wake up any moment now."
 Donnie chirped in response, letting Leo pet his back. Something that kept Donnie relaxed, they'd discovered.
 Then they heard the surprised yelp, as Leo had guessed:
 "ITS CHRISTMAS?!"
 Leo and Donnie turned to Mikey, who was giggling. "Brumation prank," He grinned. "Never gets old."
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rin-and-jade · 1 year ago
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Brain Goes Brr: A Post about Systems with Comorbidities
I'm back with my dedicated role of writing things for the sake of educational purposes, this time it's about how the two most common comorbids systems have can affect their life, and probably your's too. Being plural is one thing, but when you have the spicy brain (adhd) or the tism (autism),, things changes a lot, the few examples are: thoughts, inner-communication, social challenges, interests, and types of alters too.
Now, how do alters have varying degrees in neurodivergence? Actually, HOW does it mesh together with systemhood?? Because the brain is so complex, this is way too hard to be explained thoroughly,, so in short, it has to do with cognitive styles that got woven together. This also means why certain parts have its individual strengths that respectively comes from the existing comorbid as parts light up the brain's region with different neural paths and intensity.
How would 'tism affect my plural life?
There's a bunch of things that affects you and your other parts, such as:
Special interests - alters can be deeply invested in a certain topic or expertise, the type of interest can vary in multiple parts.
Comfort in consistency or patterns - some alters may prefer eating the same food everyday, or wear the same thing, or stick to their self-made routine. Though the frequency may vary as some can tolerate eating something different and etc.
Less welcoming to change of lifestyle or elses - alters may also have trouble adjusting to a new schedule or area, creating distress and anxiety,, this is managable by coping and planning beforehand.
Issues with social interactions and empathy levels - others may find trouble in understanding social cues, or articulation, and have different levels of verbality. Some may also be hyper-empathetic or struggle to understand what others are feeling, this can be a collective struggle or different variations between parts.
Sensory sensitivities - Last but not least, alters have different sensitivities, some can't handle loud noises, some can't eat a certain texture, some can't wear a type of clothing. Everyone's sensitivity look different.
Fictives/introjects - Due to possibly having interests from a source or finding comfort from it, system with tism are more common being seen with higher amounts of introjects. You're not faking for having too much of a certain type of alters, no worries.
What about the spicy.. or something,, ?
I think you can vaguely get the image, but i'm still telling it here:
Focus and attention - excluding the general experiences of this, i just want to say that the communication between alters are disrupted due to the inability to focus at a part speaking, this may or may not make the system have blurry or muffled inner voices most of the time. Articulating is also a problem, which makes exchanges harder.
Restlessness - this might affect the amount of parts being present, or the amount of switches,, thoughts may be sped up which can make the whole collective or certain part get lost in tracks.
Constant shifting in hobbies/interests - the struggle on keeping a hobby because the dopamine or commitment is lost makes the alter pick up a different one, leaving the previous products or items revolving it in a clutter. Now do this will multiple parts.
Unable to keep up with memories - some alters may have trouble remembering or recalling important things, just like how adhd affects normal people. Though this may vary between parts.
When you have both, the traits of spicy brain and tism may overlap each other, which makes it harder to determine if its only adhd, or only autism, or both,, but don't worry, gather more sources to read on as i don't included all of the traits or struggles each has fully.
So yes, this is how the two most common comorbids comes to play in how a system live their life. The first step of living a better life always starts from being aware and educate yourself more about how it affects you the surroundings. See you next time! (yes i like calling adhd "the spicy" and autism as "tism" please let me be)
Disclaimer: the adhd part comes from my friends as i don't have it myself, please understand.
- j
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depizan · 5 months ago
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I'm a very weird and picky audience for fiction, to the point that my tastes are sometimes a mystery for myself. Well, no, it isn't really my tastes--those I'm pretty sure of (baring the occasional weird outlier)--it's more a question of why things work for me or don't work for me.
Why does Thing One draw me in while (objectively similar!) Thing Two gets a meh (or worse) from me? What makes me care about the stakes in This Work of Fiction but not This Other Work of Fiction? Why do I sometimes feel like tastes fall into a weird area of a Venn diagram that is otherwise made up of things I really don't like?
I know that there are certain things that just lose me. But some of those things are really not that different from things that I am 100% down for.
In one sense, I don't care about stakes (at least not the way a lot of people talk about them). I will absolutely rewatch or reread something I love to the point that I practically have it memorized. And it will be the same thrilling ride every time. Yet one of the things that irritated me about the last two fantasy books I've read for bookclub was that they fucked up the stakes. But I'm struggling to even articulate what that means.
I mean, I know it's important to me that the characters care about the stakes, the conflict, whatever's going on in the story. If they don't, why should I. But that's not what either Fourth Wing or the Fantasy Novel I'm Not Going to Name Because I'm Pretty Sure It Doesn't Objectively Suck failed at. They failed in other different ways when it came to the conflict/stakes.
Actually, there is one way they both failed at conflict/stakes: too many things in both books were life or death. The first person narrator is not going to die. Or at least they aren't going to die at any point before the end of the book. Not unless there's some kind of framing sequence going on.
Now, I'm not saying you can't have tension with a first person narrator. You absolutely can. Loads of stories do. They switch the question from will narrator live to how will narrator get out of this one. Or they throw narratively possible bad outcomes at them. "Aw, fuck, I screwed up and now I've been captured by the bad guy. I am absolutely not going to enjoy the next few chapters."
Or you can lean in hard to the character not knowing that they can't fail. We know that James Bond will always stop the bomb's countdown with 007 left on the clock, but James Bond doesn't know that. And if you do a good enough job of putting the reader in the character's head, they're going to forget that oh, yeah, the main character isn't going to die a quarter of the way through the book.
But, again, that works best if there's other stuff in between the life or death bits.
The other way that they both failed at stakes was in not getting the reader (or at least not getting me) invested in the big picture. In Fourth Wing it is blatantly obvious that the main character is in the evil country of evil. Am I supposed to care if the evil country of evil succeeds at anything? (Except in the negative sense.) In the other fantasy book, I didn't have enough of a sense of any of the big picture stuff to know that I should care. (At least up until I started skimming... when it lost me, it really lost me.)
Also, which I already ranted about, The Fantasy Novel I'm Not Going to Name had the main characters make a deal with the Lying Liars Who Lie....who lied. I know all conflict in fiction is made up, but can we at least pretend it isn't?
You know, I think I'm just coming to realize how much I hate the Main Character Trusts One Of The Lying Liars Who Lie/Betrayer McBackstaby trope. Like, I knew I hated it. I ranted about the episode of the Mandalorian that used it. But in Fantasy Book it basically resulted in a whole series of events that I didn't care about because I was too busy rolling my eyes. Its literally where the book lost me.
It didn't help that at the same time, it threw in an additional conflict thing that...probably doesn't hold up to fridge scrutiny, but also just felt unnecessary. On the one hand, I know why the author did it. On the other hand, it irritated me because it diminished other aspects of the story. And then the main character made a deal with The Lying Liars That Lie, and it was all downhill from there.
Though even that is weird, because I don't dislike dramatic irony in general and I'm quite fond of Trust No One, which is second cousin to Trusting Backstabs McTraitor. But the thing is, with good dramatic irony, the characters have no reason to know the thing that they don't know. If they know or should know, it isn't dramatic irony, it's just obnoxious.
Which isn't to say that characters can't make bad choices. That can be great. But they have to be bad choices that make sense for the character and the story. They can't just be "welp, now I need the main character to do this incredibly, unrealistically unwise thing for plot reasons." At least not if you don't want me to go scream about your book/TV show episode/movie on Tumblr.
Okay, maybe all of this boils down to "I like things when they're done well and not when they aren't." But I am also the person who enjoys the Bond movie everyone knows is terrible, so who am I to say what's done well.
Which might be the other part of it. Does [Trope/Plot Beat/What Have You] make the story more fun or less fun? If it makes the story more fun, that's a hell yeah from me. If it makes the story less fun, that's a nope. And I realize that is a wildly subjective standard.
And suddenly I realize that I was probably supposed to be enjoying the things in The Unnamed Fantasy novel. As in, it probably was supposed to be fun. But I really struggle with the whole Fantasy, But With Blood, Cursing, And Tits genre. The Legend of Vox Machina grew on me once I got past the first episode, but that might be the only time when something in that genre actually did.
Well, outside of fanfic. Though, there it's more just blood and cursing.
I don't even know where I was going with all this, beside that it's very difficult to find things that are to my taste (as opposed to things I want to yeet out the window), possibly because my taste lands in a weird spot on the Venn diagram of fiction.
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meekmedea · 7 months ago
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time-travelling clemmie - school edition (yay!)
School starting up again is truly something else, Clemmie has never been so bored in her entire life (you try learning Grade 3 math. Again.)
Teachers are a little bit annoyed, she’s zoned out and doodling, but if you ask her anything, she gets it right.
They concede that at least she doesn’t distract anyone else (cough, cough - the Ring twins who zone out but will drag others into their antics)
Probably a few months into the school year, her parents get called in to talk about her test results. Both Clemmie and her parents are confused until her teacher pulls out her scores
You see, Clemmie has gotten a little too good at answering questions. She forgets to tone things down so they sound like a child is writing them
There are talks of her skipping a grade or two or three, and she panics. Because if she skips ahead, how else is she supposed to make sure her friends don’t meet the same fate in the future?
Despite her protests, her parents make her write this exam to see what grade she could be best placed in. And Clemmie spends the entire week ‘studying’ as in trying to figure out what someone in grade 3 should theoretically know. 
When the marks return and it’s baffling. Because she scores just enough to stay in Grade 3 with the odd question or two that could put her in the next grade
Cue yet ANOTHER meeting between her parents and her teacher
Convincing her is a battle they will NOT win, Clemmie panics and says she’ll flunk every single exam if they try to put her in a different class
To everyone else’s surprise, her father agrees to keep her in her original class - he knows his daughter well enough to know she’d follow through with the threat
Her teacher does recommend that they give her some sort of outlet to keep her from being too bored 
Back in piano classes - they say she’s a prodigy, nah she’s just been playing for a very, very long time 
~~~~~
Also she’s from the future - it’d be funny if she didn’t take advantage of certain things. STOCKS fear her lmao
Her, tugging at her father’s hand: Dad, can we invest in this? Him just being an indulgent father: Alright. Which one?
(Endymion Dovecote is an indulgent father, but knows better than to invest everything in the one she’s asking for. It can be a life lesson if things don’t work out and it’s never too early to learn about the value of a dollar)
XX amount of days later - the stock she’d picked is rising.
This probably happens quite a few times that her father can no longer chalk it up to luck.
Her father: I know we said we wouldn’t move you out of classes, but like, do you want to switch to  self-study for math? You get a free block at school, and after school maybe I could teach you more about finances?  Her: Yes.
Because her father is not one to let opportunities slip by. Also piano lessons are getting pricey when your daughter is a prodigy
~~~~
Dovecote father and daughter become a fearsome duo, things they invest in tend to see great returns (it's a combination of knowledge of the future and actually knowing how stocks work)
Enough that the Cardews are like: ah our favourite clients
Clemensia's mother thinks the two are overdoing it at times
Mother: Dear, I think Clemmie has enough set away for a college fund (enough to live comfortably for the rest of her life too) Father: What do you mean? Besides, this is just normal father-daughter bonding. Mother: Perhaps you two should invest in some other sort bonding time that doesn't involve buying up half of the Capitol's assets?
~~~~
see masterlist for other hcs and rambles
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