#the reason is bc it freaked my out and i dont feel like looking at them again
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I took a shit ton of screenshots so ima just dump em all here and then say one final thing at the end
Spoilers for pt2 of the dragon update in OB
Wonderful art, banger ass dialogue, BUT
JUST FINISH THE STORY NOW THIS IS GONNA BE LIKE THE THIRD UPDATE FOR THIS STORY I WANT SOMETHING ELSE
#cookie run#cookie run ovenbreak#ananas dragon cookie#pitaya dragon cookie#longan dragon cookie#mango cookie#flat tofu cookie#starch noodle cookie#they were more but tumblr has a 10 photo limit for mobile#what a shame#u might notice that the longan joker smile isnt here#the reason is bc it freaked my out and i dont feel like looking at them again#i feel like longan would have a rly dumb laugh tho#also i was so sure that tofu was going to do more#but NO#WHY IS HE THE BIGGEST COOKIE ON THE LOADING SCREEN IF HE ISNT AN IMPORTANT CHARACTER#DEVSIS#side note but what if hes the cookie with a staff that longans been having nightmares abt#side side note im gonna watch madoka now#wish me luck#en stuff
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sitting in the parking lot thinking i might vom
#it's a chain place and ive been on the other side of places like this#(i wasnt an interviewer but i was friends with them)#and there at least people would show up late + in sweats for the interview and they'd get it!#they would show up with 'oh yeah interview today almost forgot' and they'd get it!#meanwhile im having a breakdown trying to do everything right and perfect#making sure i look nice but not too nice bc again its a chain fast food place and i cant try Too Hard#also these pants dont have belt loops and they tend to shift#AND my right hand is swollen from the wasp sting yesterday so im worried its gonna be 'wtf is wrong with you'#but also shouldn't it say something that im here anyway even though i could have rescheduled#but then its like... im not gonna kill myself for this place like i did at mcd and does it give that impression?#or should i have rescheduled bc they'll think it's bad decision making to come anyway with my hand swollen#also worried that i should have parked nearby and come over closer to the time bc am i the freak sitting in the parking lot#but at least im early! but am i too early? but im out here not rushing them. but should i be so they know I Am Interested#not to even mention wtf im gonna say to them to explain my employment gap#and im so paranoid that im gonna go in and say im there for an interview and they're gonna be like ???#bc it was through an automatic text/email thing when i applied#which was how my last job happened but idk. maybe im an idiot and it's all fake so they can point and laugh#and i KNOW thats ridiculous. but that's how it feels rn.#also im worried they'll ask if i want something to eat/drink and i dont know the right answer#like i feel like i should say yes bc what do you mean you wont eat here? but the wrong thing means im taking advantage#and how will i be if im actually working there?#and its all so dumb bc#AGAIN people roll out of bed confident and they're fine. meander their way through and theyre fine. theres no reason to think i wont be#but ANXIETY#its gonna be an out of body experience no matter what and later I'll wonder about all the things i dont remember#if i fucked up or not#and now i have to go in bc it's 7 minutes until my time and i want to be a little early but not too much#fuck#wish me luck#ks talks
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posted all these muppets i drew the other day and i FEAR THAT IF I SAY THE COMMONALITY BETWEEN THEM ALL EVERYONE WILL GET THEIR KNIVES OUT ON ME AGAIN LMFAO
#free my fkn man he aint do noTHINGGGGGGG#leave steve alone ill get the sword out#thats my baby 65yr old man but thats also i love him so horribly bad in a vampiric like shakespearean way#i feel so strongly about this#everyone was a hater lowkey on insta w this#my art#muppets#fraggle rock#frootbats#the muppets#deadass im sorry he didnt do shittttttt#im tired of this im abt to publicly enter battle over this man lmfaoooo#i cant know how to hear any more about how he sucKS BC HE DOESNT HES THE SWEETEST LEAVE HIM ALONE#me included leave him alone i need to not be a freak abt him#trying to turn whatever this is into how i feel abt wembley fraggle. incredibly overprotective for no reason lmfao#my friend met him this weekend and im so unwell about it#only pics ive seen of him recently where he looks like him thats an insane thing to say but his light is gone in a lot of pics w ppl#i feel so much for him and also jim and i literally cannot get into that bc i get ill abt it#i almost got into it in my video and i feel compelled to add some shit back in in a post edit section#oh my god his insta post the other day abt jim dont get me started im fucking sick#also idk what possessed me to draw marlon#im tinkerbell abt this man ive never had this happen so bad lmfao i dont know i cant explain i am drawn to him
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Keep getting pissed off & frustrated and now my stomach hurts
#im at the library btw (important detail)#just like looking for internships for some reason makes me really anxious and makes my stomach hurt and i get scared to click on any webpage#and looking at postgrad requirements stuff also freaks me out and hurts and i need to put together some questions to ask my neighbor but im#afriad to ask smth stupid etc etc and just owie#i emailed my one prof to see if we have any homework or whatever and that was one thing i did#checked my assignments but havent started any yet though now i know what and when#then i turned to online shopping and adding to my wishlist like im supposed to but thats whats really make the stomachache happen bc i cant#figure out which product i want between 2 companies and also we live in an advertising hellworld that wants to manipulate me and i hate it#even the thought of me buying a comic on the way home doesnt help atm#bc then ill be going home after being out for 2 hours w my only achievement being writing down like 3 questions for my neighbor (NOT all i#want to say) emailing my prof and working myself into an anxiety spiral about christmas gifts#okay im getting emotional now and am on the verge of tears i should go home bc obviously this isnt working#and my mom is at home and she always makes me feel better#i fucking hate our hellscape and i hate how evil and manipulative amazon.com is. just be a normal service that sells normal fucking goods#jesus fucking christ. its like the whole world will end if i dont get advertised to every single second of every fucking day
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i need to post about the random shit i fixate on for like weeks at best more often. i think the random acadieman deep dive i did that one time might have almost exclusively been on twitter before i dropped that site again. that was the weirdest turn i took other than when i got sick and got obsessed with dnb until i got better and literally could not give a shit about it anymore
#that one was really funny cuz there isnt really that much online (didnt look that hard to be fair i didnt feel like it)#and also i cant understand 90% of it because i dont know french.#i only like vaguely understood it cuz its acadian french that has some english in it#the only reason i decided to look at stuff about it again was bc i remembered seeing it on tv and being freaked out the animations. rough#ANOTHER THING THE ONLY REASON I REMEMBERED THIS WAS BC I ACCIDENTALLY FOUND MY ACADIEMAN FOLDER LMAOO
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man idgaf about what treville and richelieu have going on (mostly nothing) (they dont like each other but they work together a lot bc of their jobs.) (i guess treville holding onto a sense of honour whilst working with the cardinal is interesting but like that's not. thats not really those two having something interesting going on). lets talk about the king and the cardinal man.
#the way the king sometimes resents the cardinal's influence but is so easily manipulated to feel lost without it.#the fact that he'll openly acknowledge the cardinal wants him to rule unfairly and play favourites. with a fond look on his face#''i will disband their whole regiment if that's what it takes to make you happy. only please don't leave me alone'' with tears in his eyes#all of which was exactly what the cardinal was going for and he just gets away with it!#the queen finds out he was trying to have her Killed and she says yeah fuck you obvi but i wont tell the king tho bc he loves you ?#i'm not saying any of this is like romantic to be clear lol. it's just very interesting#i mean i dont think it can probably be categorised really. but im definitely not calling it that#it is super interesting though the way the cardinal needs to undermine the queen and place himself closer to the king to succeed in his aim#it would be somewhat appropriate for sure to say its kind of a parent-child relationship in some ways but that's definitely not all of it#in terms of the way the king relies on him and his guidance. but again thats not all of it and he's not a child. or not actually a child.#and i could say this about any of the relationships between men on the show but of course Because they're both men that means the#Possibility of it being anything but fully platonic is not something he can acknowledge and for that reason whether it is or Not there's#still going to be a level of repression and denial that just complicates things. even though/if theres not truly anything to deny#meanwhile honestly i think the cardinal is personally being normal about it even tho he's a freak about a lot of other things#i mean idk that was my impression. i am sorta-watching through s1 again so maybe i'll develop my ideas on that#anyway#me.txt#musketeers posting
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#dai: jolie richard trevelyan#oc: richard joly#grapecase plays dai#they are a rendition of a disenchanted if pc with a dash of sable one of my sherlocks [who need to get back to]#i am still on the fence if i wanna do bi cullen and just do a male pc [even if that means maybe missing out scenes] or do a femme form/afab#pc who is trans#actually i think they go with they now [mostly bc the mods]. MAYBE she/they [so i dont twitch whenever they call them 'my lady' .... i thou#ht i could do it soundless but im a coward]#[though it was fun trying to imagine their voices lol]#but when they meet krem it's all over!#i think their time as an apostate has given them a lot of 'youre too pretty for a man' which has put the seed in there#hence the face tattoo serving double as a distraction from beauty and that tehy are a woman*#sadly dai thinks women's shit sould be tight forming and they should have their nails done. but i have hc for that too#[they prefer bulky arrmor bc it hurts to bind. curse of the big tits.]#*but nothing distracts ffrom their eyes unfortunately#i wanted to give them merlin eyes. for a few different reasons. but i like the idea that their family is well known for their beauties wit#their gorgeous hazel-brown and dark chocolate eyes so dark it looks like youre looking at a clear night#but then THIS FREAK. further showing they are different#as much as - what i know of him - cullen doesnt deserve to be the romantic hero for this type of storyline#i refuse to put him with a woman bc im petty#and if must endure t-rex then it must be no half assing#tho im sorta feeling dorian would be good given the bg and expectations [but honestly bruh they took me out with that slavery talk!]#kendis is - probably - still my main#but the ideas were itching#gonna REALLY wait til i start bull's romance#werweewe REALLY. i promise this to myself#*sitting on hands*#shuffle your unwanted mage child into the circle and they come back the inquisitor and man and queer
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SMG34: LIPBITE COMIC WIP UPDATE
oh boy... i know a bunch of folks are hyped for this comic... and boy oh boy are ya'll's prayers going to be heard... kind of... butt for the celebration milestone, and granted majority are from this comic, i thought it was best to give EVERYTHING that i have currently.
starting off STRONG with what you freaks most want: the completed pages. andddd yep that's it that all that i have done LMAO. i've been fixated on my own smg4 oc: tsb, and during the end of my summer was unfortunately fucked over by some personal issues that fortunately got resolved last minute good grief the anxiety prevented me from drawing the gays sigh... aNYWAYS LINEART WIPS!!!!
here are linearts i have completed / in the progress of!! want to aim like i did in the past by finishing up lineart first, and then speed through with color + minor rendering. the reason i have a few colored is to test out what it would look polished and my god... i have improved A LOT. THESE GAY PEOPLE GIVE POWER I AM NOT KIDDING BELIEVE ME IM NOT CRAY- anyways onto wip pages!
jumpscare: tsb stickman sketches. oh yeah. this is how i sketch and i blame sensei eiichiro oda /j. and in case anyone is unable to understand it {i don't blame u LMAO}, smg4 wakes up from the dream and is startled to see mario by his bed. they have a short convo before mario leaves, and we get a job to smg4 in the bathroom trying to put up a brave face. until the moment he leaves he's stunned due to seeing smg3 at his front door. will i elaborate more on specifics or unwritten dialogue? NOPE! gotta keep secrets to make it even more enjoyable at the end!!
currently at 13 sketched pages total, but this is probably gonna be reaching towards 20-ish pages, surpassing part two, but it will depend on how i come up with how to end it. additionally to confirm there will be a PART FOUR / chapter 3, to end this story. my goal is to have it done before i finish my senior year, or at least during the summer after i graduate bc good lord who knows whats gonna happen.
and lastly, before i end this crazy update, SCRAPPED PAGESSS!!!!!
CONTENT WARNING : NSFW SKETCHES !!!! PLEASE LOOK AWAY IF YOU ARE A MINOR OR DON'T LIKE THIS TYPE OF STUFF!!!
oh boy... dont draw comics while sleep-deprived at 6am... idek what i was even aiming with this ngl other than just for fun, but i scrapped it due to not being what i had in mind for the story. if it doesn't serve a purpose or narrative, its bye bye YEAH BYE BYE THIS IS THE CLOSEST NSFW UR GONNA GET FROM ME HAHAHAHAHA- i say that despite writing a nsfw jojo wattpad smh im only confident doing it in words good lord. btw not watermarking these bc i gen don't care since they're legit scrapped {left top part was kept and completed} so idk what to do with these. im just throwing it and walkin away
now to end with this update, i can hear your question, "when will this be done?" and to answer that question: i'm not entirely sure due to my heavy focus on my smg4 oc: tsb, but my best chance is postponing my oc lore a bit and complete this before november UOIYGJDSIUHJKDWSXYUGHJKCS but we shall have too see...
if you want to join the ping list comment on this post LMAO [click]
ignore below if you're not from the tsb birthday partydddjdhdhdjd
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thurs: smg34 is canon in the tsb universe / au. though most of their encounters are platonic or best-friendy-way, they eventually express their feelings to one another and start dating 3/4’s way of the tsb storyline arc. tsb is a supporter of his friend's relationship and admires and takes inspiration from their relationship heavily to input his future love life. yearning to be in a similar position... to learn what is to really love someone... or what it's truly like to be loved...
#smg34#smg4#smg3#smg4 smg3#smg43#smg3 x smg4#smg4 x smg3#smg4 fanart#smg3 fanart#smg4 comic#smg34 comic#sketches#comic wip#comic#tsb 1k birthday party#tsb official
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ok detailed surgery experience
i made this schedule (?) of the major events as soon as I left while I cld still remember (and still kinda forgot!) i like knowing the Times of stuff so I asked my dad to take note of Times for me, and tried to ask for the time where i could
surgery I got was a laproscopic bilateral salpingectomy, full removal of the fallopian tubes only!
Misc details off of dis, obviously TMI territory as its a medical procedure.
The second blood draw (they took blood from me yesterday tooooo) hurt less and more somehow. Nasty nasty bruise forming.
IV really was the worst part of it ! I'd get weird throbs of frustrating pain long after it was in
I was given compression stockings that went right up to my crotch. Your toes stick out, and they put hospital socks over your feet. Some additional compress wraps were placed above my knees.
Pre op/prep didnt take too long at all. I know I have it listed as over an hour of waiting, which always made me nervous to read in other people's experiences, but it doesn't really feel like waiting. The TV helps pass the time, as do the people who are with you if any, and the nurses popping in with help or instructions or updates. The prep room was small and the bathroom was next door. The double doors open to wheel you out. Remote was given toe to control the TV and also call the nurses via a speaker.
The nurse who wheeled me in was nicest, she pronounced my name Correctly and was also really funny and friendly...
In general I knew this surgery was going to go well because I was actually able to fall asleep last night. I've stayed awake/tossed and turned for events far less stressful. Dis was also due to part of it kind of not feeling real for me! And being wheeled into surgery room added to that! It didnt feel real, it felt like watching one of many scenes from medical media of the same point of view.
I did start quaking and shaking once in the surgery room (also small, I did not look around much in fear of it making me panic last minute!)
They had me scoot from the prep bed to the surgery table. There was a pink foam headrest for me to slot the back of my head into. They strap you in with arms out like ur being crucified and thats when it became more Real for me so i started shaking a lot, but I can't tell how bad it was under the heavy blankets. I think I shook more and for longer when I went for my MRI (which also isnt/wasnt scary but the body freaks out for no reason). Im surprised at myself for being so Calm ykwim
Anyway, strapped in, had monitoring stuff stickered onto my body: my sternum, side of body under chest/armpits, and another pair I cant remember where. Hair was put up in hair net. My hospital gown was untied as the tie starts halfway across your body and goes under, but this was not done in an invasive-to-privacy way, and I was still fully covered by it (and then recovered by blankets)
(3 separate people asked me how many kids I had throughout this whole venture, and were Shocked at my response. This was the other most nerve wracking part as I started to get weirdly anxious that someone wouldn't like this and cancel my surgery or something. One of the Askers was the anesthesiologist.) Doctor/surgeon came in and asked if i was ready and talked about how he loved being under anesthesia LOL. Everybody was speaking about their opinions about childbirth and sterilization and parenthood, but amongst each other and not to influence my decision, along with telling each other to set up XYZ. Once again everybody is charmed by Cheye's usage of the word "yay"
Ive never had surgery before, so I was worried about anesthesia. In my mind i was imagining it to be being fully lucid and then your vision darkens and takes you, which was scary to me like i dont wanna be freaking out and then immediately KNOCKED out!
But it was gradual which actually made it more calming for me...the funny nurse put the oxygen mask over me, I got very nervous bc she said to take deep breaths and honestly i couldnt even breath much at all in it, and breathing out also felt very restricting and like I was going to choke, but it wasn't Distressing. I just breathed slowly and it worked anyway.
In a few seconds I felt a cool tingle in my arm that then sort of burst into my torso, and my whole body felt really light and my eyelids draggggggged half closed, but it felt very mechanical and involuntarily (like slowly closing window blinds...or like how the brightness options on a 3DS are numbered buttons ykwim? Like, Closing 1, Closing 2, Closing 3, Closed Halfway, all pressed in quick succession). Heavy heavy heavy. I stayed in that half closed state for a while! (Probably not even a full minute, but it also wasn't instant...i still had time to think and Hear conversation etc, as well as feel that there was some mechanical thing tightening around my spread arms along with the hand adjusted straps)
The funny nurse was telling me to relax and have sweet dreams and that they wld take care of me and such. And then I was out. I do not remember my vision fully fading or eyes fully closing, in my mind they stayed in that half closed state.
Ive heard ppl say it feels like blinking and waking up, but it did feel like sleep to me!!!! I know dreaming under anesthesia isn't really a thing, but waking up felt like....i was really waking up like normal and trying to remember traces of a dream after several hours of sleep.
I always thought it was silly seeing ppl ask if the surgery was over when they come out of it, but I did that. But like i swear it came out involuntarily??? Like i knew it was over....i think it was because I couldnt really SEE anything when i woke up, I could only hear staff speaking to me, and I can barely remember what they said. Vision was VERY very blurred. So I guess that question came out as substitute for Where Am I, and Who's Here With Me? Speaking felt like when audio unsyncs from a video, with my voice trailing far behind my words. I also remember being really bewildered bc there was some sort of residue on my lips, like when they're chapped and dry and cracking. I learned later this was bc of the intubation but i Didnt Know That Yet so i was just scared and thirsty.
Adding another "pain was less bad than the average period which has one Doubled Over" statement to the pile. Pain was at 3/10 or 4/10, which is to say if period pain is a whole abdomen event, this pain was small little bruises occasionally being brushed up against, just small throbs of sore pain in the 3 incision spots. I got an incision inside my belly button and that was the most present sensation, but that might also be bc I hate anything having to do with that area in general 😭 always feels weird.
My throat felt very DRY. It wasn't pain yet, it felt like when you're thirsty + dehydrated and your lips stick together at any slight moisture, but in the throat. Kept trying to look around and wiggle my fingers and toes in hopes that'd help me Come Out Of It sooner bc not being able to see was really frustrating me. I could not make out the face of the person watching over me for some time. I really wanted water !
HORROR when the person looking over me said i had a catheter still in me. Nightmare I wasnt counting on actually happening and wasnt mentally prepared for. I was told I would have one placed (make sure to ask if this is a concern for you!) but i thought they'd take it out before I woke up... I cldnt even feel it in me when I was told this! Which is good.
The staff of course had to remove blankets and open my gown a bit to access the area. But I did not feel any distress about this at the time.
Had a very funny slow motion distress response bracing self for removal. It did not hurt or sting at all, it just felt like [something I cant describe here]. Just pressure! It was pulled out gently but quickly of course.
After 1 hr i was wheeled to a separate private recovery room. The nurse uncovered my lower area to check if incisions were doing good so far as well as to check if I had been provided with a pad/underwear, as some patients have blood or other fluids come out as a result of the surgery.
parents came in, was so grateful for juice but in dismay over my food item being orange (i dont like citrus flavor) jello (i dont like jello 😭) i consumed all of both.
I also worried I'd feel weird about throwing my body parts away. But I dont feel anything ^_^ just feels very awesome and natural
Sore throat started further developing. Nurse came in after some time here, taught me how to Get Up. Was scary! I was worried about it hurting, but it was just more soreness.
Was able to go to the bathroom, went a very little bit but it was enough. I was very scared about seeing my incisions and being disgusted by them....but I caught a glance and it was Okey Yey. They are covered in surgical Glue and dont look gnarly, swollen, red or anything they look very cool ^_^ got dressed in stages as there was nothing to set clothes down on and sat back down on the bed. The bathroom connected to another room where somebody else was preparing for surgery.
Nurse came in with final post op instructions, upon describing nausea to me my skin got cold, stomach activated and krusty krab exploded with it. She was just barely able to get me a bag to throw up in. This exacerbated the throat pain. She encouraged me to get it all out especially since I also expelled gas, which is a good thing.
IV removal didnt hurt! Same level of pain as the tape around it being yanked off. I couldn't even tell it was over. I was wheeled out of the hospital. ^_^ i wore an oversized dress my sister lent me, and cheap target sandals so I wouldnt have to bend to tie shoes. My dad pulled up the car right outside. I brought a pillow to be a barrier in between the seat belt and my stomach.
Its 6:48 neow and I am laying down, but the pain is (currently) the same. I had another nausea (and release. Also exacerbated throat pain.) spell (while in walmart picking up the pain meds), was boiling alive in my very hot room, and was a bit dehydrated which may have contributed to some misery and nausea but as of right now I'm ok, i changed into lighter clothes, drank water, ate a bit, and situated self in a room with ac....i worry about getting up and becoming nauseous again 😭 i hate throwing up.
People are right about it being more discomfort than pain! You have to walk around every few hours, and it doesnt hurt but every step feels like my bellybutton is kinda pinching inward. Being tugged at from the inside. Ive gotten to a point where even chuckling makes me feel this very Sour soreness (not regular dull soreness) so maybe ill start the meds soon if necessary.... Squatting to sit doesnt hurt in a debilitating way, neither does actually sitting or putting on/stepping into clothing.
I couldnt nap because laying on my side doesnt hurt the incisions or anything, BUT its just the strange discomfort again. The weight of gravity on the body makes the incision sites feel very very weird in an abstract way i cant describe. It isnt pain. It feels like a mismatched sensation of some sort. Like if you touched your nose and somehow felt the touch on your knee. Adjacent to this. A very specific sensation sits in all the incision sites and drags down through your mattress to the ground and it feels Weird.
If you get up properly it really doesn't hurt to do so! Use your leg to get yourself fully onto your side, then use your arm to push yourself up into a sitting position.
I am very nervous from when all the good strong hospital meds wear off t_t i heard the day after is a struggle because of dis. but ive got the prescribed pain management on hand (extra strength ibuprofen and tylenol with codeine!! O_O) neow at least ^_^;
OH, AND THE DOCTOR TOOK FOTOS OF MY INSIDES LIKE I ASKED! ^_^ 🫶 I have glossy printed souvenir now! I dont exactly know wtf im looking at but its awesum LOL maybe i will ask for details at the follow up!
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borderline illiterate gruvia think piece.
happy gruvia day i guess!
so like…… im a grown woman. so believe me when i say at this point i rly couldnt care to be genuinely bothered by antis. like i will literally just block them lmao. ok yes i did write a whole fic revolving around a comment by an anti KFHDKSJWJEDK but i rly wasnt mad i was just genuinely inspired by what they said.
ANYWAYS! nonsensical 294820381002 word rant incoming from the “unbothered” grown woman.
seeing people say how gray is out of character in 100 yq/has stockholm syndrome are literally missing the entireeeee point of his and juvia’s relationship and its crazy!!
*side note, i think for the sake of helping gray’s character and development, they sacrificed a lot of cool things about juvia and a lot of her individuality which i do not like. but thats a rant for another time. btw do notttt even come for me bc she is literally still by far my fav character lmao*
im probably gonna go on for too long about this but gray’s whole fucking character throughout the whole story from beginning to end is centered around the fact that hes cold and closed off and grumpy and “too cool” and listen im not saying this is fucking rocket science or any type of transcendent literature by any means but i HAVE to point out that hes a fucking ice wizard. like. duh. im sure his character/personality was meant to go along with abilities i mean look at literally EVERYONE else in fairy tail.
ANYWAYS the reason he is this way is because he’s so used to losing all of the people he loves and even worse, hes used to so many people sacrificing themselves for him.
and it traumatizes him!! so many people hes been close to have died and he ultimately always thinks its his fault! lord knows im rusty with ft knowledge but his parents died (cant remember if it was in any type of sacrificial way teehee), Ur sacrifices herself for gray, ultear sacrifices herself for gray, and his dad dies AGAIN (once again, not sure if this was in a sacrificial manner lmao. i kindaaa think it was? maybe? shrug.). but POINT IS! theres a common theme of loved ones dying and/or sacrificing themselves for him. there might even be more people lmao idfk.
so what happens when he meets a girl who has an overwhelming and unwavering and infinite love for him?! he is freaked the fuck out!!! for a couple reasons! 1. he is so used to losing the people that love him and 2. he doesn’t even think hes deserving of any love to this degree!
then what happens? he PUSHES HER AWAY! KEEPS HER AT A DISTANCE!!!! because THATS ALL HE KNOWS!!!!!!!!! yes he has his friends who love him but no one has ever loved him in the way and abundance that JUVIA DOES! so he has to react appropriately! lots of love = lots of keeping her at an arms length!
so when he thinks he loses juvia in their fight with invel, and she comes back, dont we think it would make sense that he finally realizes he should accept his feelings for her? i mean remember when he said he promised her an answer AFTER the war? once again, like gray, pushing things off. and then he almost LOSES HER without ever telling her how he feels! so gray realizes life is short! theres no use in trying to deny ur feelings! these are common themes in like 85% of my gruvia drabbles lmao.
im not even saying that it was love at first sight for him and that gray liked her from the jump. bc i dont think thats true. i think we can finally see outward romantic feelings for juvia right after the tartaros arc, when juvia visits gray at his parents’ grave. but before that, i think juvia was a friend (wellll i feel like after the tenrou island arc he liked her more than a friend, but he didnt really realize how much more) who he cared about, and truly didnt know what to make of her because like i said, hes never known a person to love him so much and actually not die LMAO.
but my point is, juvia is the perfect person to be gray’s romantic partner. she is a person so full of love and so happy to love and she doesnt care who knows it. she is unequivocally herself and she wears her heart on her sleeve to the upmost extent.
it literally only makes sense for his character to end up with her!
u could argue gray doesnt need to end up with anyone at all bc he has his friendsssss and likeeee. sureee. fine. but what fun is that? i personally want to see the scared-of-love grump to find his person. i think, again, thats kind of the point of gray’s character- learning u are worthy of love, accepting love, and learning to love openly.
im sorry but literally what better happy ending for him than to be with juvia?
so fast forward to 100 yq, where he is just sooooo out of character apparently. dont we think that may actually be…. character development?
the boy who probably couldn’t even fathom a romantic relationship is now finally accepting he’s in love. he’s done pushing it off, he’s done denying, he’s done depriving himself of feeling love. thats a step in the right direction! now what? in true gray fashion, he thinks hes still not good enough! and that’s where we are now. he’s not confident, he thinks he’s weak, and he thinks he cant protect her. why? he knows she loves him. he knows he’s objectively a strong wizard. so why does he feel inadequate? CIRCLE BACK!!! TO WHO GRAY IS AS A PERSON!!!! SINCE DAY ONE!!! constantly in fear of losing his loved ones! thinking he can’t protect them! SCARED TO LOVE!
like im sorry the proof is soooo in the pudding and i totally understand if gruvia isn’t ur cup of tea but to say things arent making sense is silly to me! they actually make perfect sense!
and yknow what. im gonna go from a romantic standpoint to a realist standpoint. years ago, mashima said he likes gray and juvias dynamic and didnt have anything serious in mind for them anytime soon. so he kept that going for literally the entire series. well. he ended fairy tail alluding to the fact that gray and juvia were kinda together at that point. or he at least ended it with the pretty obvious conclusion that gray does in fact have feelings for juvia. so then when ft 100 yq starts what was he supposed to do? act like all of their development in the last arc never happened? that would be kinda hard to do!
whatever i just hope at least like 3 of these sentences were coherent lmao u guys get my point
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TRUE FORM BASED HABIT HEADCANONS :D
note: these are obviously not all completely accurate to the canon sketch we have of his true form, so if youre a canon purist you may not dig this post. these were all taken from my own personal version of his true form.
- similar to cats (mainly talking about bigger wild cats here) HABIT has little spikes, aka papillae, all over his tongue. i know his canon true form has some spikes at the end of its tongue, but this is how i like to view them since it makes more sense to me.
the spikes on cat tongues are there for a few reasons, but the main reason that sticks out to me is the fact theyre used to scrape meat from bones. i feel like thats pretty fitting for HABIT, considering he is a predator/hunter.
- HABITs claws cannot retract and he has paw pads similar (but not exact) to a wolves. hes literally a werewolf spider demon freakazoid thing, so i think it works!! plus the idea of him having paw pads of some sort is silly...
- his fur is a dark purple-ish tone meanwhile his (multiple) eyes are a brighter purple. he doesnt have pupils, his eyes are just one solid color. that last part is basically canon since evans drawing doesnt include pupils either, but i still wanted to mention it bc i think its cool :P
- HABITs teeth are similar to a wolves, though his are sharper than a wolves are, letting him sink them into things easier.
- he doesnt need to sleep often, but sometimes HABIT curls up into a ball to sleep more comfortably, like this ↓
- HABITs tails wag when hes happy or relaxed, but if someone were to point it out he would get annoyed and probably growl at them. HES SUPPOSED TO LOOK EVIL!! YOURE POINTING OUT THINGS THAT DONT MATCH HIS EVIL PERSONA!! HES SO MAD!!
- in the MLAndersen0 video "GOODBYE" theres a clip at some point where it sounds like HABIT purred. im assuming it was meant to be a growl that came out more purr-like, but i do like the idea of that evil fucked up looking creature being able to purr. similar to the tail wagging, he would probably get pissed if someone called him out on purring as well.
- HABIT can stand and walk on two legs, but he can also walk and run around on all fours. i dont think he would use his spider legs often, but i think he would definitely use them to appear taller/bigger and present more intimidating.
speaking of appearing taller/bigger, i think his true form would be pretty big. definitely bigger than your average wolf, hes probably like... idk, 2-3 mackenzie valley wolves combined.
- i think he would chew/bite on things for fun and out of boredom. im mainly talking about bones here, but he probably chews on random things he deems chewable sometimes too.
- HABIT would probably enjoy being petted but would never admit that. he would act like he hated it and would probably bite and growl at whoever was petting him. obviously not many have the opportunity to even attempt that, but if it were to happen, thats how i think it would play out. THIS ONE IS ALSO JUST KINDA SILLY TO ME like imagine THAT FREAK letting his guard down for a moment to enjoy the feeling of being petted
THATS ALL FOR NOW, FEEL FREE TO SEND ME ASKS ABOUT HEADCANONS 🐾
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Hickey for the character asks pls? 👉👈
ohohoho! lovey suggestion !! i am always down to talk about a fellow ratt, so yes of course!
First Impression: IS THAT FUCKING HICKEY?? THE FERRET FACED FUCK I HATED WITH MY WHOLE BEING? THAT'S HIM? THEY MADE HIM A FUCKING TWINK???? People better not be fucking woobifying him i swear to god...
Impression Now: ohh noo. oh no my worst fear has come to life... i like hickeyyyy i like him a lotttt. i feel like this is how billy feels just "oh god. oh god is this working for me? son of a bitch it's working" On a real note though, he is sooo fascinating to me. He's a lot more genuine than i think people give him credit for. He's just so paranoid and has been taught to be so self-sufficient that it overrides any actual connection he might make with people. When given the chance to help, he does so, even if it is often tied to making himself look good. He didn't have to help Manson and Hartnell take Hornby's body down. He could've just cut in to undermine Irving and left it at that. He didn't have to grave rob to propose to Billy. He could've left everyone to burn in the carnival. (The fact he gutted McDonald do so and only looked as upset as "you fucking idiot, you stained my knife"... well that's just the other half of his personality showing) But he does all that. bc he does care. in his own twisted, detached way. Adam Nagaitas said something to this tune in an interview and its like. yeah!! he does care!! ...he just cares about getting himself on top (👀) more than any of that.
Favorite Moment: Goddddd what a hard question. Is it bugger victoria? (shout out fitzjamesbulletwound) Is it ratt wedding? (his smile is so sweet) is it his speech at the gallows? ("BUT ABANDONING HIS SHIP!!! SHOULD NOT BE AMONG THEMMM ☝️") i could be predictable and say its him taking his lashing like a fucking champ. his cheeky fucking smile throughout really encapsulates his "fuck you, I'll endure just to spite you" attitude. No it's not any of that. It's his casual smoke after he and billy get caught. it's really indicative of his personality and the unshakable force he'll be in the narrative. "there's worse things than being lashed ;)"
Idea for a Story: would loveeee to do a deep dive into his past. even if leaving it a mystery is more compelling, I'd really like to see what kinda menace he is on the streets of england.
Unpopular Opinion: that he actually doesn't want to eat people. he wasn't going into this with the hope that they'd turn cannibal. the situation had just gotten so dire and his lead poisoning and/or god compex had corroded his brain so bad he probably thought it made him an apex predator.
Favorite Relationship: He's got so many delicious dynamics to choose from but I think I'll go Crozier. He wants to be his friend. He wants to usurp him. He wants to fuck him. He wants to kill and eat him. He doesn't want his men to rough him up. He greatly looks forward to having a chat with him at the end of the world. He chains him to a boat.
Favorite Headcanon: that he plays the piano. and he's not great, but he knows his way around it. and its great fun to play for a crowd of belligerently drunk assholes who dont know the difference.
ANYWAYS THANK U THANK U FOR GIVING ME A REASON TO TALK ABOUT THIS FREAK <3333
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NEW CONTENT TO ANALYZE 🛐
For now have a very eepy fixation on the scene where Saran is wrapped around Vika. He's not even close to being physically similar to Vika. Does that stop him at all from being his own weighted blanket/being able to wrap himself around him? Not at all. The reason he has tentacles is to better wrap around Vika
(Something about how Saran seemed to be absentmindedly petting the scars, I wonder if it was due to the texture? Or just something he likes doing. Idk something about it is very intimate, for some reason, usually you'd see a character kissing the area so i guess it's because it's something i haven't seen before that IS a display of intimacy. Rolling it over in my brain. Like a rotisserie chicken. Good concept)
Also 'VIKA CONTROL YOUR TOOL' lmao. It's giving 'GET YOUR FUCKING DOG BITCH' "It don't bite" 'YES IT DO-'. Protective Saran. Also a tasty concept. Good brain food too. Good stuff
(Also, the person who was saying that they liked Saran despite having some issues with eyes is so real. I have a horrible eye phobia. Eyes in general (specially eye contact) really creeps me out and every now and then there will be an illustration where i go 'ah yes this is the eye character. How the fuck did I forget that when IT'S HIS WHOLE THING' because genuinely you HAVE to be putting something in him! He doesn't creep me out! Genuinely i dont have any idea how Saran isn't just one walking trigger for me or why i enjoy him as much even when he does occasionally spook me
It's so weird! Fascinating! Genuinely feel like consuming Saran content (well. Your content in general but specially Saran related) has desensitized me somewhat to eyes. I even find myself particularly enjoying the way eyes have been drawn that day! Good characters good lore and now I can go a step above in my character analysis (in other fandoms) by watching their eyes without getting freaked out about it! Never have been so happy to have stumbled across someone's work)
-eepy 🦜. Still rotating the way they cuddle in my head. Saran is so attentive. So lovely....
imo, wrists are super intimate to touch (probably bc im very sensitive there and dont like them being touched unless its someone im comfortable w and trust); not to mention scars (esp if its SH)
saran stroking and tracing them gently is like him acknowledging them but not judging or pitying etc vika; not paying extreme attention/hyperfocus to them but also not ignoring them to the point of it becoming obvious. they are just a part of the person he loves. they are just there
also, saran just really likes to touch (so does vika) but very soft and gentle; hes the kind of person who will always gently run his knuckles down your face, hold your wrist and trace your veins or scars, stroke the back of your hand or palms, push stray locks of your hair behind your ear. its little but very intimate touches that say more than words could in this moment, more powerful than a bold touch imo
LMAO ITS FUNNY BC while im not scared of eyes at all or anything, im also just very uncomfortable and bad with being looked at/eye contact (i can manage when its a few seconds tho but i really do hate being perceived) but drawing saran so much and his many-eyes when theyre all staring straight at the viewer never fazed me lololol (prolly bc i stare at my own drawings longer than any of you, since i work on them n all)
i love how the eye-guy somehow managed to break through yalls fear of eyes tho!! saran was on his way to become a doctor before he died, does it count if i say bby still managed to "help" at least one a little bit even tho hes dead now? 🥹
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@emmg and @thessaralka
Okay sorry to @ but I have a sad idea I’m gonna turn into a fic and just wanna share before I write it. And this post is a little nonsense bc I’m just typing whatever my brain is thinking at the moment.
So. I just learned that it was WEEKS in the real world before Rook was saved from the fade prison. I genuinely thought they were saved at the end of the ghilly battle but NOPE EKSNSNABW. I guess I missed that part somehow?? Idk but anyways I had a solavellan idea.
I know (or believe anyways) that Solas is on the run since he’s now in the real world and probably runs off to one of his hideouts or whatever. I haven’t played DATV in awhile so forgive me if I’m forgetting something and he said where he went. But I like to imagine him doing his shit and everything………….but he knows the inquisitor/ex-inquusitor is in Tevinter, or at least was and he’s worried about his Vhenan. He’s worried that with all the shit going down, that possibly they could’ve been hurt and Rook hasn’t said much about Lavellan’s mental state (which tbf Lavellan probably wouldn’t tell anyone or at least mine wouldn’t) so he has 0 clue on how she is.
So what does the egg do??? My man does what he did before DATV: stalking and searching for her. I just imagine him in his smaller wolf form, prowling streets in Tevinter and alleyways and sees Lavellan in Dorian’s estate. She’s safe, with a best friend, someone that would do almost whatever it took for her to live, and is okay. Just imagining him watching her through a window while he’s a wolf and his ears are back and his tail is between his legs and he’s DEFINITELY WHINING.
But the moment Dorian or Lavellan turn to look in his direction (for whatever reason) he immediately hides and runs away back to a hideout or whatever to do his plans.
And then everything falls down to where he sees the eclipse start.
OH FUCK NEW IDEA SORRY MID TYPING. IM ON PHONE SO I DONT feel like deleting everything else BUT IMAGINE WHEN HE SEES THE ECLIPSE HIS HEART IS FREAKING OUT EVEN MORE FOR LAVELLAN????
I just like to always imagine pining Solas even when there’s blight everywhere and his plans are literally to the wind yet he still has room in his mind for her. He always does have room in his mind and heart for *her*.
#solavellan#dragon age the veilguard#sorry to @ out of nowhere but I need to share this idea and I don’t really have too many ppl to talk to#about solavellan fic ideas. I have the discord but I also want to share it to some on tumblr LMAO#dragon age#lavellan x solas#solas x lavellan#my writing
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Heavens to Betsy I’ve been meaning to go on this rant forever but I keep forgetting for some reason
Quick disclaimer- I’m not analyzing your comic at all, I just notice little accuracies that make me happy.
~
Ok coming from a psychology major student, your description of PTSD and mental health issues is actually pretty dang good. Idk if it was intentionally researched or not but there’s like a ton of stuff that’s consistent with real life trauma and it’s quite frankly impressive
Again not sure if this was intentional or not but the thing on his back reminds me so much of old school electroshock therapy which I adore bc
A: it causes confusion and memory loss which you’ve shown and
B: kinda implies that maybe he did his own research when deciding how to deal with everything or
C: again is incredibly accurate in the fact that most trauma patients continuously seek pain out, and in turn report feelings of extreme boredom and numbness when not actively experiencing pain or reliving trauma. In his case going borderline catatonic when he’s not freaking out.
On the topic of “freaking out” a lack or decrease in serotonin leads to a more reactive and intense episodes in PTSD. Or, because the little guy is like mega depressed coz of the whole situation, he gets way more intense and violent episodes that someone who was on like Prozac. And would tend to be more on edge and sensitive to triggers.
Then there’s his family. For some background, there’s a part of your brain called the amygdala. It typically works to control basic emotions, but responds very well to fear. In traumatic experiences, it pairs with the hippocampus (the memory center of the brain) to store vivid and occasionally sensory memories.
When a memory trigger is provoked and brought back into consciousness, it actually changes slightly depending on the context of which it recalled. Those memories are changed to fit how we make sense of them. So if he feels guilty for his brothers death, then his memories will reflect it whether or not it’s actually true.
Essentially, him having his brothers showing up all the time (looking the way they do) is really bad for him on multiple levels, and not just because they’re triggering visually. They’re like actually impeding his ability to recover by keeping him in an aggressive form of already intense fight or flight that comes from trauma.
On a happier note, one of the best ways to improve is to establish and nurture caring relationships. Awww
Aight ima stop here so I don’t bore you to death with random psych facts, but like kudos to you my dude because I could go on forever about some of the stuff in there
Uh yeah
-writing anon 🤡
WRITING ANON? SLAPPING OUT ANALYSISSISIS AND SHIT?
Bein real I dont do much research on shit even tho I should. I just go off what I’ve seen/ learned throughout the years. It’s always good to hear I’m doin ahit right tho!
Lowkey right with the shock tho. Or high key lol. Seeking pain there’s other ways people do it but mmm somehow this seemed the tamest way. Oh writing anon u silly lil saltine cracker
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One thing imma be real one thing i don't like about some mouseverse comics is that some characters just straight up look so human, and honestly I think that theres some good missed potential with some of them like the phantom blot la creatura
Before I got into the comics for good I thought the phantom blot was suppoust to be a human and that was one of the reasons why he freaked mickey out so much bc he's just straight up activating his uncanny valley/ is somewhere where he's just straight up not suppoust to be so he doesnt look like anything mickey's seen yet but apparently he's suppoust to be a dog
I think blots design is very good without his mask he looks like one of these rich people way over their head (its bc of the mustache, brows and half closed eyes half of the time im telling you he looks like he has 500$ of spare change in his pocket at all times )
(He'd rob me out of my money on etsy)
But blots design really doesnt look like a dog and I honestly think for him thats a strenght for a couple of reasons I dont wanna fully write out here bc id be getting into character design study for like 4 pager out here but the main point is Blot is the villian and a well masked one on top of that his design being highly diffrent from others is a good thing bc he's already not like others he stands out and he's evil and he's suppoust to be creepy so I think not really looking like a dog despite teachnicly being one has its purpose and even metaphor to it if you wanna go that route (maybe bc he views himself so above everyone and so humanized compared to them that he ends up sticking out, because he is so above them he's no longer one of them and its visible in his design)
But the points above start to fall flat and explode like a comicly large firework when you consider eeeeeh
All these are background/one off characters so I understand why the designs arent exactly thought out on the same level as main characters that would honestly be ridiculous but some of them just don't look like any animals and some straight up look like humans with slightly altered face structure
And that unfortunately also goes for my best girl samantha
ily but you do not look like a dog girl T T
When I was first reading that comic i thought she got the "kitty kat" treatment but turns out its just a thing for one off/side characters
Also there are some alternative designs for already existing characters that look more human in animation that arent used for some reason probably bc the animation and comic departaments being quite diffrent and also having a giant brick ball between eachother or disney just refusing to re-brand or re-design things that are already somehow well known
Comic o'hara design ^^^
Animated o'hara design ^^^
There very slightly diffrent but I can easily tell animated o'hara is a dog while the comic ver had me a bit confused (especialy since I didnt see the ears at first)
Also o'charas first apperance IN COMIC FORM looks alot more charming to me for some reason, the same goes for other police officers
he's so fat here I love it
They look alot cuter that way imo I like their snouts alot more in that form Plus they do the side eye every dog ever gives you at some point you know exactly what im talking about 🫵🫵🫵🫵
I dont know it could just be me being picky but I feel like there would be some ways of making the side characters look more animal but still easy to draw and design, maybe something like character base's for diffrent animal species that can get altered for diffrent one off/side characters...or giving the comic artist more time to do their job crazy idea i know
Idk like i said it could just be me being picky but I just don't like that and think there are some ways to change that
This is just my opinion and rambling though so lemme know what you think maybe im missing something or you preffer them that way Id love to hear others opinion since I know there are ppl out there who put alot more thinking abt the mouseverse than i did and probably ever will
ye
#mickey mouse#Mouseverse#Mickey mouse comics#phantom blot#the phantom blot#character design#rambling#critisism#mickey and friends#disney comics#<< very much not Public domain use
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