#the reason Derailed has the impact it does

[secretmellowblog]

It’s odd how lots of writers basically turn Inspector Javert into Claude Frollo?

In the original novel Javert is not obsessed with Jean Valjean. It is not his life’s goal to capture him. He is a police officer who is bad because he is a police officer; he’s bad because he’s just doing his job, and his job is to enforce cruel violent bigoted inhumane laws. He reunites with Jean Valjean by coincidence and just seems mildly annoyed by it. He doesn’t care at all about Jean Valjean any more than he would care about literally any other criminal in the world (until the barricades, which is the first moment when he does develop complicated emotions for him.) Javert isn’t bad because he is obsessed with Valjean— he is bad because he is a cop, and as a cop it is his duty to be mindlessly cruel. He is indifferent to Jean Valjean on a personal level. He is not obsessed, he’s an authoritarian.

But Frollo!

Frollo is a character who has a deep personal obsession with someone, pursues them relentlessly out of that personal obsession, and then uses the law as an tool to abuse them. Frollo is the one who makes it his life’s mission to capture some random person who did nothing wrong and use the full power of the law to torture them for his own gratification.

I kinda don’t understand why it’s so common for Les Mis adaptations and stuff to turn Javert into Frollo by making him ~personally obsessed with Valjean~ and ~making it his life goal to catch him.~ It severely undercuts the novel’s political message about the evils of the prison system, and also just makes Javert a far shallower and less compelling character. It makes him evil in a way that isn’t even interesting to read and has nothing very valuable to say.

[ohhgingersnaps]

I'm seeing some frustration over fandom creatives expressing anger or distress over people feeding their work into ChatGPT. I'm not responding to OP directly because I don't want to derail their post (their intent was to provide perspective on how these models actually work, and reduce undue panic, which is all coming from a good place!), but reassurances that the addition of our work will have a negligible impact on the model (which is true at this point) does kind of miss the point? Speaking for myself, my distress is less about the practical ramifications of feeding my fic into ChatGPT, and more about the principle of someone taking my work and deliberately adding it to the dataset.

Like, I fully realize that my work is a drop in the bucket of ChatGPT's several-billion-token training set! It will not make a demonstrable practical difference in the output of the model! That doesn't change the fact that I do not want my work to be part of the set of data that the ChatGPT devs use for training.

According to their FAQ, ChatGPT can and will use user input to train itself. The terms and conditions explicitly state that they save your chats to help train and improve their models. (You can opt-out, but sharing is the default.) So if you're feeding a fic into ChatGPT, unless you've explicitly opted out, you are handing it to the ChatGPT team and giving them permission to use it for training, whether or not that was your intent.

Now, will one fic make a demonstrable difference in the output of the model? No! But as the person who spent a year and a handful of months laboring over my fic, it makes a difference to me whether my fic, specifically, is being used in the dataset. If authors are allowed to have a problem with the ChatGPT devs for scraping millions of fics without permission, they're also allowed to have a problem with folks handing their individual fics over via the chat interface.

I do want to add that if you've done this to a fic, please don't take this as me being upset with you personally! Folks are still learning new information and puzzling out what "good" vs. "bad" use is, from an ethical standpoint. (Heck, my own perspective on this is deeply based on my own subjective feelings!) And we certainly shouldn't act like one person feeding a fic into ChatGPT has the same practical negative impact, on a broad societal scale, as a team using a web crawler to scrape five billion pieces of artwork for Stable Diffusion.

The point is that fundamentally, an ethical dataset should be obtained with the consent of those providing the data. Just because it's normalized for our data to be scraped without consent doesn't make it ethical, and this is why ChatGPT gives users the option to not share data— there is actually a standardized way (robots.txt) for website servers to set policies for how bots/crawlers can interact with them, for exactly this reason— and I think fandom artists and authors are well within their rights to express a desire for opting out to be the socially-respected default within the fandom community.

[foundfamily-connoisseur]

PUNCH OUT HCS CUZ I DONT GOT TIME TO DRAW THEM BUT THEY WONT LEAVE ME ALONE!!!

Something something the voices

This is so long I'm sorry

No I'm serious I started derailing I think

LITTLE MAC

Mexican-American! His ma is Mexican and immigrated to The Bronx, where she met Mac's dad (who we have nothing on lol, he dipped before Mac was born).

His ma? Oh yeah, she died :( He doesn't know how, just that he came home one day (latchkey kid) and saw the cops surrounding the apartment. Placed him in an orphanage but got into fights a lot and deemed him a 'problem child' (literally just an autistic kid grieving the loss of his mom)

As said, Lil Mac is autistic! For the most nonverbal and thus uses ASL, but also speaks English and Spanish from time to time(English from Doc, Spanish from his mother and childhood friends who helped him keep up). Spanish is his preferred language tho.

Narcolepsy haver. It usually doesn't interfere much with his actual boxing matches since he's learned to feel when they're coming and deal with them accordingly. Took him and Doc a while to figure out that he had it since they just chalked it up to his prior malnutrition(which also impacted his growth, capping him at a whole 4'9)

Affectionate(?): must be initiated by him. He's very much for hugging and holding hands but if someone else does it first he's like :/. Only people he's ok with is Doc Louis so far.

Trans: transman who figured himself out pretty early when he only played soccer with the boys out in the mud. His mom cut his hair super short as a 'punishment' for always getting dirt in his braids but jokes on her he loved it. Doc has been helping him with hormone blockers, and with the prize money saving up for surgery 🙏 you can do it maccie boy!!! No one else in the ring knows and he'd rather keep it that way thank you (both out of nerves but also why do they need to know 🤨 what are they the fbi???)

Fashion sense: if you try to get this boy in anything but a tank/shirt and shorts he will explode. This man rocks flip flops and sneakers for days and it's all that's in his wardrobe (maybe another hoodie or two). A lot of them are rather worn but he hates the idea of "wasting" money so he uses em till they're literally impossible to wear.

Very spiritual: believes in el Mal Ojo aka Evil Eye and such. (Mostly from his mother and the women on the block that took him in from time to time). If he thinks your vibes are off, he will do an egg cleanse and swears that they work (they do i can attest to that chat).

GLASS JOE

EDS HAVER!!!!! (Ie Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome). This man has glass bones and paper

he don't care he will fight till he's dead! That and boxing actually does rlly help him with his joint pains. He finds it kinda funny when ppl worry about him like "sorry guys i gotta lie down real quick i think my ribs went criss cross". He prefers to get around on wheel chair but can get by with crutches(to which he just lays on the bed forever afterward)

Cat dad!!!!: less him having an actual pet cat than him just tending to whatever feline that crosses his path. May or may not have some scratches on his hands don't worry about it.

Actually really good friends with Mac: (we're going to pretend that they aren't literally thousands of miles away shut up). One of the few to make an actual effort to learn ASL rather than pick it up slowly or have Doc translate. In turn, Mac has gone about learning bits and pieces of French, enough so that both can communicate in their respective language and the other can (mostly) understand them.

This man is such a critic like what do you mean the food lacked a certain "je ne sais quoi" or the movie "insisted upon itself". He really wants to be nice but if it has any touch of French, he is going to murder it because it isn't French enough or actually accurate.

Had an ex fiance to which they broke off for reasons he'd rather not elaborate.

VON KAISER

Tics: he has em. They worsen under stress, but occur randomly or if overstimulated

Served in the military before being discharged. He doesn't like talking about and his tics start acting up if the topic is brought up.

Widower: wife died fairly early into their marriage and he was absolutely distraught. They both always talked about having kids, and a part of him still wants that, but it won't be the same without his Engelchen.

Career: he had wanted to be an engineer, but after serving in the military couldn't bring himself to go into it. That, and being a boxing teacher let's him tend to kids, even if it means getting socked in the stomach. He always acts like a strict instructor, both from his own experience in the military and because he wants to keep the kids at arms length. Also his wife being a kindergarten teacher had nothing to do with it nooooo

Close friends with Hondo and Glass Joe. Bear Hugger is a friendly fella but his loud and boarish disposition gets him riled up. Gets along well with Little Mac and if Doc isn't present for whatever reason, he's good at helping Mac calm down if he starts getting overstimulated and vice versa.

He also totally doesn't have Lil Mac be a pseudo son to him and think about his kis could've been potentially his age who said that.

Emotional support animal: German shepherd called Hugo. That's his baby right there

Disco Kid

That man's a fruit your honor!!!! No but fr tho he's a queer man living his best life.

Also a drag queen! (Name pending). Doesn't really care for how others perceive him and goes with the flow really.

Definitely fought with his dad a lot when he was younger, but as he grew his father came around and now they have a pretty solid relationship.

He's a total mommas boy tho he will literally die for her. He also has a little sister who he plays dolls with. (And yes she asks him to say it in his girl voice iykyk)

Gets along with pretty much everyone besides Mr. Sandman really (Aran Ryan is an interesting case. You heard it from the grape vine but they have an on and off relationship).

An art major for sureeeee. Idk what kind but im sensing something

Really good with machinery though. Usually just so he can fix up his car and stereos.

KING HIPPO

He is for sure not human. I always draw him more beastly but he's probably closer to whales/hippos than actual people.

Like hippos, all that's fat is really just pure muscle. No cuz google up a hippo and remove their skin them bitches are SHREDDED!!!

Naturally very affectionate, although he prefers his pals in the minor circuit (and Lil Mac. Yes this is Little Mac supremacy everyone will be his friend).

Absolutely loves cocktails. They come with fruit how can he not. Funnily enough he despises apples though.

Has multiple wives: a primary wife and secondary wives. Has kids with most of them and naturally, the first born son will take his place when the time comes. (He does love all his kids and wives equally tho so don't worry about them).

Surpringly eloquent" while he can't exactly form human speech, his writing is impeccable, both in letter and in word choice. No one knows how he does it with those claws and big ass hands.

PISTON HONDA

This man has so much manga it's insane. This mf probably has a whole room dedicated to his collection. Yes most of them are Shojo and yes he has a lot of Sailor Moon merch and memorabilia. (although he does also enjoy other such Mangas like JJBA and Inuyasha. I'd say he's embarrassed about it but bro was reading Sailor Moon out in the open so id say he's at least fine with reading it publicly.

Has gotten some of the other boxers to read some of his recs and watch some animes with him (he will force you to watch Madoka Magica and Revolutionary Girl Utena. It's only a matter of time.) It's also how he got into other shows like Candy Candy (by Mac), The Golden Girls(by Disco Kid. He likes his oldies what can he say), and pretty much any and every telenovela ever created (Wow wonder who it could be).

Has a pet Shiba Inu that he loves to bits but DAMN does she test his patience sometimes. And he has a lot of it.

Also began learning ASL when he caught wind of Glass Joe doing it, although he practically forced Lil Mac to learn Japanese because damn it, sometimes the dub doesn't do the show justice!!!

Has two older sisters!!! He's the baby of the family lol and it don't matter if he can pick em both up they'll still pinch his cheeks and tease him.

BEAR HUGGER

Trans: a transgender man who's loud and proud. Never bothered with top surgery he ain't cutting off his girls!!! He could pick up the vibe™️ with Little Mac but he's not the type to try and force the conversation. He'll let Mac come to him on his own time, and if not then that's fine too.

Loads of animals: similar situation to Glass Joe, although now it applies to all animals. Bro is a Disney princess. He sticks his arms out and birds fly to perch on them. Can seemingly hold an actual conversation with animals and no one knows if he's losing it or if they are.

Family: an only child, but with loads of cousins who fill in that sibling role. He's actually really good with kids and takes care of his nieces and nephews from time to time. He has thought about being a dad from time to time (he'd really like to have a girl) but always decides against it.

Affectionate: to the highest degree. That man is always asking if ya need a hug and it ain't just a threat for a grapple/ear clap. He and King Hippo get along swimmingly as a result (if only they didn't die if they went to each other's respective home country 😔)

Prosthethic: ya cant tell cuz of his clothes, but he has a prosthetic leg! (Stops a bit below the knee). If he ever takes it off for whatever reason, he always goes "aw man, guess I'm on my last leg" and the crowd goes mild. Thinks it's the funniest shit ever tho and he won't stop making the joke (Little Mac made it worse by giving an actual chuckle. Mac you've doomed us all with your horrible sense in jokes. I blame Doc)

GREAT TIGER

Loves cats: absolutely adores them. This man has a cat onesie I can feel it in my bones. He hangs out with Glass Joe solely for the cat (also the baguettes).

Gossip: he has a horrible habit of gossiping that he's tried to curb but astaghfirullah sometimes he's gotta talk about Don's receding hairline😔 Mac isn't helping him pinche chismoso!!!

Doesn't like going to parties involving alcohol with the WVBA because almost always he's forced into designated driver. Usually he just teleports away because he's not dealing with that yall are calling an uber!!!!

Actively avoids searching up ingredients in things he eats (like gummies) because if he doesn't know it's not Haram.

Sneakerhead: very proud of his collection. Also really into rap music (we don't talk about his career...that never happened chat) and you will hear it blasting from his car.

Sister!!! Stealing this from a fic but he has a younger sister who works internationally. If she's there with him she serves as his translator.

Magic: not limited to clones or what's seen in the game, but it's his preferred type of magic. He can also transform things and people into other things/creatures. He accidentally made Mac into a rabbit and everyone had a field day with that one.

DON FLAMENCO

Chismoso: this man will shit talk anything and anyone. If you talked with him chances are you're part of a gossiping ring with the older ladies who work nearby. I think they're talking about how you're a puta but idk

Former womanizer: this man banged anything that had a beating heart and a pretty body. It wasn't until he met Carmen that he knew what love really was. Once they got together UGHHHH this man was a fucking loser for his Carmen. Took years to win her over but it was all worth it for his amor.

They talk about kids sometimes, but this mf childish that he sees it as having to share his beloved fiance. (They for sure have kids later down the line tho. Give them a minute damn!)

Beef: tbh he doesn't really get along with anyone; he just dislikes them all to varying degrees. He and Mac hate each other on the principle of one being Hispanic/Latino and the other being a Spaniard. Do NOT leave them alone for any reason. Last time they both argued about the spanish word for 'straw' and sent each other to the hospital where they argued some more.

Telenovelas are his life force. If you interrupt his showing of La Rose de Guadalupe, he will literally kill you.

Got Aran Ryan into it by accident: he was watching Teresa in the living room when Ryan was crossing to go to the kitchen for a bite. An hour later he's sat on the couch hand in heads. They both watch it together now.

Great cook: he makes a means paella and he knows it. Always makes it to show off 'Spain Superiority'. Little Mac hates his guts but he's not gonna turn down a free paella.

ARAN RYAN

People joke and say he has brain damage which is why he's so crazy, but he actually does have CTE so 💀

Family: aside from his general knack for recklessness, having a piece of shit mom and an even worse dad (who of course had to die in a freak accident at work) does not exactly leave you the most sound. He has loads of sisters and brothers, being the second oldest of the bunch (with one older sister of which the hate is mutual). It's a big factor to why he doesn't want kids; he's spent a big chunk of his life working to raise them.

Boxing: to him it was both an outlet for his eventually anger issues and a means to raise money in the same punch. It did lead to fucking him up physically, as after a particularly nasty bout with Mr. Sandman, an eye got knocked out of place so he's working with only 50%.

Very jittery: you can never catch this man staying still. Even in his sleep he either tosses or twitches a leg or arm. Trying to make him stay still just makes it worse.

Repressed Bi it's not even funny. His excuse for his on and off relationship with Disco Kid is "well he's basically a lady!" He'll come to terms with it eventually, but that's one hell of a long road.

Superstitious: biggest thing for him is luck. he breaks a lot of shit but mirrors are not one of them!

Low-key misogynistic: "my sister punches harder than ye, boy!" Like damn your sister must be knocking ppls jaws clean off the freak. If he ever finds out that Lil Mac is trans it's just gonna be him like "SHIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIT" cuz now he's gonna get canceled on Twitter dot com by Super Macho Man😔😔😔

SODA POPINSKI

Married!!! Has a tiny little wife that he loves to bits. She will scold him and he's just all :]]]] wife...I luv her sm... he's a total wifeman

They've been trying for a kid (bro you can't just say that...gross). Naturally this man wants a shit load of them god help that woman.

A major reason to why he's been making efforts to curb his drinking habits! Of course he still hits the bottle every so often, but he's for sure gotten better than his first time in the ring.

Cooking skills: surpringly decent believe it or not! Anything with meat he's killer with and he always makes ridiculously large portions. (Yes it's because he wants to make something nice for his lady let me make a wife guy!!!!)

Really likes Beyonce. Major fan actually he goes to so many of her shows.

Horrible with social cues. This man does not understand when he's being too overbearing (to the detriment of his friendship with many alas😔 especially Von Kaiser and Little Mac). Tries to apologize by offering them a soda like 🥺🥤

Speaking of Little Mac, he once tripped over him (6'7 vs 4'9...oh dear). Flash forward to them in the hospital. They both swear to never speak of this again (also Soda gets him authentic mexican cola so like...we're all good here).

BALD BULL

Anger issues galore: got his father's temperament(don't we all???) And in addition to being bullied a lot as a kid, he hasn't really found the best way to manage. Usually he just goes out to a secluded field or heads out to the sauna, but the press has done little favors to his mental sanity.

Cat magnet: not of his own volition. They are drawn to him like flies to honey. He doesn't really mind them and are a nice way to de-stress.

Music taste: while he usually listens to classical music and instrumentals, he loves himself some girlie pop music. You pull out his ear buds and just catch "Girls just wanna have funnnnn" Before he punches you into the sun

Cattle farm: Inherited from his family, he loves all his cows to bits. They are his pride and joy. He has Glass Joe come over sometimes for some cheese and wine.

Isn't particularly close to any of the boxers beyond Glass Joe and Soda Popinski. He spends some time with Lil Mac, usually just to go out and get some ice cream or something. He likes the kids company cuz he isn't as energetic or demanding in the same regard a lot of teens are.

SUPER MACHO MAN

He for sure has a purse dog named princess. It's a white pomeranian with a pink bow i just known it.

Was a child actor! His family got him into the world early, staring as the sweetheart of whatever show or movie he was in. In his later teens, he was the heart throb before he left the scene as an adult to focus on boxing. His parents were at first disappointed, but after seeing the money roll in? They had no problems after that.

Romance: as expected, nothing permanent. He usually just has loads of flings or one time hook ups that never amount to anything, and he doesn't bother looking for anything "real".

Probably has a kid out there somewhere but if he does, he's denying it till his dying breath.

Similarly to Don, he doesn't really get along with anyone. For him it's just a matter of his own superficial nature. He absolutely detests Mac, but is the only one to know ASL fluently due to a former childhood friend. He doesn't use it beyond wanting to be bitchy in secret.

I know he's super tan but I'm not allowing him to be white. He's a lil something...will figure that out later.

MR SANDMAN

Yeah ngl I don't got a lot for him. I don't think i have anything actually. Huh

He mains Kirby in smash.

He used to have a lisp when he was younger

Yknow how some parents will have kids super far apart? Yeah his parents did that what do you mean he was 22 and he got a new baby sister. What the freak.

He absolutely hates Macs guts but also can't take him seriously on account that he's 4'9. Whose child is this. Literally, when he first entered the ring, he asked whose kid was this and that children weren't allowed in the ring. Lo and behind this was the schmuck that knocked the lights out of 12 other fully grown men, and he was coming for your ass next.

BONUS

DOC LOUIS

Took Mac in when he was around 9, formally adopted him as soon as he could. Heard of a ruckus for a missing child some minutes away and when he came back with Little Mac, he thought he found his parents. Then he got the situation explained to him about how he didn't actually have anyone, everyone just agreed to look out for him. There he officially took him in as his son.

Put the kid back in school after learning he hasn't been in since his mom died. He's considerably behind for his age, but has taken great strides to catch up. He's now just a year behind.

Definitely a major learning curve when it came to raising a child, much less one who barely spoke english(if he spoke at all) and prone to outbursts. It's been years since then and he can't imagine a world without that kid.

Had a wife but they divorced after he found out she had an affair. Sent him on a downwards spiral but he managed to pick himself back up. Having a kid to raise really helps him out.

Close to his sister, but that's about it. She's who gave him pointers on how to raise a kid, as they were about the same age. He doesn't think hes have done as well if it wasn't for her.

Former coach of Bald Bull, but parted ways after arguments on what exactly that wanted to do moving forward. They're amicable now, though.

[sinnersandoverlords]

I originally did not want to engage in any of this nonsense because I honestly believe that taking sides in a toxic relationship where both parties have repeatedly used each other for their own gain and have a lot of ongoing misunderstandings and miscommunication is pretty stupid. 

So I am gonna preface this with saying that I am neither „Team Blitz“ nor „Team Stolas“ and I do not hate any of them. Both Blitz and Stolas are inherently good people with flaws and issues due to their trauma, and that impacts all of their relationships. I think the narrative has been very clear on that, so idk where people get the idea from that one is the victim and one is the abuser in this situation.

They both are not innocent. Painting one as the abuser and one as the victim is disingenuous as they have both done objectively morally questionable shit.

But recently I have seen people shitting on Stolas so much and painting him as this awful abuser, even going so far as to call him the abusive party and the show adressing any faults Blitz has in this relationship as „victim blaming“.

Bruh.

So I really felt the need to adress this.

First of all:

„Sexual harassment“ – Please do look at the context of S2 ep 1. We are precisely told why Stolas acts the way he does. He believes that Blitz is into him behaving like a kinky bottom, and that Blitz wants him that way. That is why he acts the way he does.

Does that make it right?

No, but it is a matter of miscommunication rather than Stolas purposefully overstepping boundaries.

Once the Ozzie’s ep happens and Blitz confronts him about „Stolas only wanting him for sex“, his approach changes and he tones his aggressive flirting down a lot, as well as any pet names etc.

Yes, Stolas did things wrong.

He actively tried to mend things and do better.

Idk why people ignore that or call context and character development we have been given as „retcon“.

Then I have also seen some awful takes recently on how Stolas expected a relationship from Blitz and tried to manipulate him by offering him the Asmodean crystal.

Dude.

Are we watching the same show, guys?

He gave him that Asmodean crystal WITHOUT EXPECTING ANYTHING in return precisely because he wanted to form a relationship free of any obligations/transactions where Blitz could make a choice to be with him or not.

The power imbalance. Yeah, the power imbalance with the whole Grimoire situation and also just in general have always been a problem, but that is what Stolas tried to better by giving Blitz the Asmodean crystal so that their relationship would not involve the livelihood of Blitz in any shape or form anymore.

Also I am a bit annoyed by people ignoring that the whole relationship started because Blitz tried to manipulate Stolas to steal from him. Doesn’t make the transactional relationship ok, but Blitz never started out as a completely innocent party in this whole deal either.

Could have Stolas communicated his reasoning to Blitz better and asked him if he even wanted the crystal in the first place? Sure, I am not saying that Stolas handled everything 100% perfectly.

But some people here go out of their way so much to paint Stolas as this malicious sexual abuser, ignoring context, how both parties share blame on the situation derailing like that due to miscommunication and misunderstandings.

Thanks for coming to my TED talk.

[rin-and-jade]

Damn it, Back to Square One: A Post about Skill Regression

It's like how that one time you had an interest to practice a cool trick for impressing people, and you're fully committed until it was pulled off perfectly, only to be performed once before its forgotten for a good while.. Yet, when you thought of going back to that well-practiced trick, it barely replicated the results that was from the previous attempt.

How? You perfectly knew how to do it inside your mind, but your hands failed to perform otherwise. Which means being forgetful wasn't the culprit, but to how our brains store these learnt skills--or behaviors. This is an example of skill regression, let's learn more!

TLDR fast pass: AVAILABLE

What was that?!

That setback? - oh, not to shock you with it being a real thing, here's the general definition of it:

"A phenomenon which entails gradual or abrupt loss of previously acquired skills." - PubMed Central

Yikes, um, nevermind. That DOES sound like a shocking problem... but yes, to put it simply, this regression can be regular or abrupt depending on the circumstances that triggers it. Skill regression also can manifest as temporary or permanent loss of any skills, too.

By the way, everyone can experience this type of regression, though for those who are neurodivergent,, they actually risk skill regressing 5x more than a normal person would, double freaking out right now? Save your screams, i haven't said it is doom's day with no cure.

Then why,, why?

im not telling. Just kidding,,

Here's where thing's get complicated.. There's two common neurodivergence, and those two divergence have fully different reasons why a skill regression was triggered. Isn't this wonderful--you're going to read longer than you'd expect now. (Ha! But knowledge is power.) I'll attempt to keep it as concise though;

Those with ADHD, this is why you got setback:

Stress - it can impede how well you perform or think, causing a temporary regression. Tasks that are usually effortless now takes double the amount of effort to achieve the same result.

Unfamiliarity - You might've practiced singing in your own personal home, the unique atmosphere, and audience who resides in that abode feels like a default setting due to exposure and repetition. So, if you were to do it outside in public, or a stage, the sense of anxiety and zero preparation in a different setting causes your brain to simply.. short circuit. It's temporary though.

Executive Dysfunction - because of how it impairs many other processes such as planning, action, memory, and focus,, these impairments can severely impact how you apply the learnt skills to reality. This is a comorbid-related default reason for regression.

Those with Autism, this is why you got setback:

Overstimulation - sensory disruptions and overwhelm can cause an imbalance in cognitive function, it's like how a computer lags from the sheer amount of information and causing all necessary operations to a halt. This is temporary, upon retreating from stressor.

Unpredictability - routine and stability is where people with ASD function at peak, obstacles that got caught up in the way breaks this flow of mind, as if a train had derailed from it's tracks. Depending on if it is solvable or not, it can be temporary or permanent regression.

Inconsistency - Skills need to be practiced, and often require repetition to further ingrain it. Without it, you would have difficulty applying to different contexts or even worse, fail to create a solid neural pathway and decayed. It can vary from temporary or permanent regression.

Other conditions that cause skill regression:

Neurogenerative diseases such as Alzheimer or Parkinson

Brain damage

Psychological disorders such as depression, OCD, Schizophrenia

Nutrient deficiencies that impact brain function

Withdrawal side effects

Stress

The issue complicates even further when you have other conditions, and/or have ADHD and Autism at the same time. This causes higher chances of overlapping and potential stressors that triggers the regression.

How is this system related?

I promise this post is also related to systemhood, but the basics on this phenomenon still has to be taught so you and i are on the same page. This has been sufficient, so let's finally get to the point of this post!

Right, this is where the questions start flooding, "why do alters have different proficiency?" "why are some unaffected, yet others are susceptible?", and other kinds. Let me go straight to the point.

Alters retain different memories, and they don't get to choose what they remember. These memories can be explicit or implicit information:

Implicit - Where actions are unconsciously adapted and performed, needing no conscious awareness or effort. Automatic. E.g. riding a bike, writing, holding cutlery.

Explicit - Where actions require active recall and thinking in order to be performed. Manual. E.g. math multiplication, reading comprehension, speaking (needs vocabulary)

Skill regression can impact two main aspects such as:

Your social skills - how you pronounce, how to start speaking, or how you use the words, or stay engaged in a conversation

Your motor skills - how you do independent actions, how well is your rough and soft skills, or muscle memory

And sometimes, you can have both skills impacted

Which means.. what the part remembers, can also impact different kinds of regression it will be susceptible too. For those who have shared skills but cannot perform as good, or at all, compared to the proficient alter, this regression is natural due to the dissociative element.

Something feels wrong..

What was that? You just had a realization which unintentionally causes you to function worser than ever without the skills returning?

It seems like you learnt to do things when masking. It basically means when you are used to living in a tight little box, and finally got out of it,, it is more difficult to fit in there again which conveys the strain in upkeeping the skills you had learnt previously.

The purpose of masking is to function on a daily basis to avoid conflict or negative experiences,, it can be as simple as conforming to the norm of "eye contact when talking" or alternatively it is how you cope while being unaware of your condition (such as baring uncomfortable textures, thinking everyone feels that way)

Problem here is, because it feels wrong/unaddressed yet it keeps you going, it will take more energy the longer you upkeep these skills in a masked state as the core issue wasn't tackled. This will slowly bring you to a burnout. So when you realize that this isn't the norm, your mind just drops everything on the ground in relief as its silently detrimental to your health, no matter how convinced you it is helpful.

This is a permanent skill regression caused by any kinds of exhaustion.

Things won't go back to normal?!

Sadly... no. Good news is, you can always build a new framework!

Though, you will be immediately greeted with a problem: hypersensitivity.

After realizing and being aware of the situation, the accumulated stress, and any other factors that comes into play,, being overwhelmed would happen in a daily basis when left unaddressed, so make sure to minimize the sensory/emotional stressors and pay attention to any heightened senses. Also incorporate regulation tools, since if emotions were suppressed when masking, unmasking means releasing these pent-up feelings, making emotions more intense than usual.

Burnout is not normal exhaustion too, so refrain from overexerting yourself and implement lots and lots of rest.

From here on, it will be easier to re-learn everything from the start, and specifically in ways that accommodates your needs. It takes plenty of time in order to see results, if you need any help in this aspect, you are always free to reach out to me or search for any resources regarding this.

Another reminder for yourself, this type of skill regression also cause other symptoms such as trouble focusing, poor memory, and overall difficulty in doing regular tasks as it feels taxing.

Last notes

Okay my bad, you must've expected that alters are involved with skill regression due to CDD's--but apparently, it is closer to neurodivergent experiences that manifested in systemhood.

What are your thoughts on this? I was surprised myself, were you too? Let me know what's interesting in this post so far, and other questions you might have!

- j

--

TLDR

What is Skill Regression?

Skill regression is the loss of previously acquired skills, either temporarily or permanently.

More common in neurodivergent individuals (e.g., ADHD, autism).

Causes of Skill Regression:

ADHD:

Stress: Impairs performance.

Unfamiliarity: New settings cause anxiety.

Executive Dysfunction: Affects planning and memory.

Autism:

Overstimulation: Sensory overload disrupts function.

Unpredictability: Routine disruptions cause setbacks.

Inconsistency: Lack of practice leads to skill decay.

Other Conditions That Cause Skill Regression:

Neurodegenerative diseases (Alzheimer’s, Parkinson’s)

Brain damage

Psychological disorders (depression, OCD, schizophrenia)

Nutrient deficiencies

Withdrawal side effects

Stress

Skill Regression in Systems:

Alters may have different skill levels due to varied memories and experiences.

Dissociative elements can naturally cause skill regression.

Addressing Skill Regression:

Build new frameworks tailored to your needs.

Minimize stressors and incorporate regulation tools.

Ensure plenty of rest to avoid burnout.

Skill regression is more correlated to neurodivergence which in return affects system experiences, rather than where being a system causes skill regression.

[network-rail]

Upcoming bad weather and disruption

This weekend, the Met Office has issued a yellow warning for snow and ice over most of the UK and an amber warning for snow and ice across Wales, the North, and the Midlands.

Snow and ice are probably the worst sort of weather for trains that ever happens in Britain (well apart from maybe floods), so it's important to know what to expect when travelling by rail when it's rather cold and wet.

The easiest way to understand how snow & ice affect trains is to think about how they affect you – when it's icy, you have to be careful when walking or cycling so you don't slip and fall, and when there's snow, walking becomes much more difficult and cycling is nearly impossible. Probably, it's never snowed enough here for me to attempt cycling in deep snow but I think it's reasonable to assume it would not be easy.

Both snow and ice cause electrical problems since water conducts electricity, and it can interfere with connections to third rail and overhead wires. Also, icicles can form underneath the wires, and could damage pantographs. Third rail is affected more though since it's way easier for snow and water to stick it, and the electrical contact is on top rather than underneath.

Ice is bad partly since it makes the rails more slippery, which makes accelerating and braking much harder; but it is also bad because if there's enough ice it could change the track geometry, like in that movie. This would lead to a derailment, and since ice is slippery the train could potentially slide across the ground for several kilometers before stopping (typically once it encounters an obstacle such as a building).

Snow, meanwhile, is a whole different story. Depending on what sort of snow it is, there can be different effects. Snow that is loose and powdery tends to get everywhere, such as between points and into electrical systems (causing malfunctions); and it is very easy for it to pile up in front of trains, obscuring vision and slowing down the train. If the snow is the denser, wetter type, then it doesn't get everywhere, but it still gets in the way, and since it is denser it's harder to just plow through it (well, at first. if you go through powdery snow you will eventually turn it into packed snow).

When it does snow enough to affect services, we may cancel more than is strictly necessary, because a snow day is a wonderful thing that should not be restricted just to children. We cancel the services so you can skip work and go have fun in the snow, but some people don't appreciate this properly. This is mostly because executives don't take the train to work and don't have any joy in them, so they expect the line to go up even on days when everyone should be out playing in the snow. If you really want to get to work in the snow or ice, then you can help out if you grab a shovel, a bag of salt, and start clearing the tracks yourself. We want to enjoy our snow day too, you know.

Finally, one phrase you'll often see is "the wrong type of snow." This phrase was invented by the British press after some particularly bad snow one year, and they never stop bringing it up. The problem isn't "the wrong type of snow," the problem is they aren't letting us do our job properly and are making everyone mad at us for something we didn't do. It's not our fault if it snowed (it's the Met Office's fault), and besides, would you really trust the people who killed the APT? WELL, WOULD YOU?!

Anyways, this upcoming weekend you should expect disruption all over the place. If this impacts your journey, maybe you should consider doing something about it (see comment about a shovel above) or walking to your destination instead of complaining. Oh, you'd rather not do that? Well then maybe you should be quiet and wait patiently while we do all of the hard work clearing the tracks so you ungrateful parsnips can get to your jobs –which you hate– instead of having fun in the snow.

[velvetvexations]

i don’t know if you’re open to asks about this type of discourse so feel free to ignore it if you want, you’re still awesome either way, but holy fuck the way people get about no/low empathy people drives me up the wall sometimes.

people equate empathy with compassion and morality far too often, but paradoxically have none for hypoempathetic people. it’s fundamentally unhealthy, because it tries to argue that if you /general aren’t personally invested in an issue or don’t emotionally react, then you can’t care about it at all, which can drive away low-empathy people who do want to help because they’re just going to be criticised for something they fundamentally cannot change. it’s alienating and quite frankly unreasonable, because that rhetoric tells me that they think the feelings and internal workings of a person are more important than their actions and impact. this makes it so empathetic people don’t have to change to consider themselves ‘good’ people by their standards, so they can keep hurting people and defend themselves with their empathy, rather than doing the work to stop. how could they be a Bad person when they care so much about things?? /s

of course this isn’t everyone, but it is quite a few. on the other side of things, if someone with low empathy does something harmful and changes, people may still see them as a ‘bad’ person because they haven’t shown remorse despite the fact that the harmful behaviour has stopped and they may have already for it.

a lot of this rhetoric is implicit, though there are certainly a lot of explicit arguments for it (ie empaths and the misuse of low-empathy personality disorders like npd and aspd). i see a lot of odd wording on how people retaliate against the ‘autistic people are asshole robots who don’t Care’ stereotype. there are a lot of arguments of ‘well actually autistic people aren’t heartless!! we can be hyper empathetic too!! we express it differently but we still feel empathy’ and like, yeah, hyper empathy is really common in autistic people. but what about the ones of us who are ‘heartless’, as you put it? its good that they’re pushing for the understanding of autism to be broadened and i commend them for that, which is why i try my best not to derail posts with this, but what about the rest of us? we still get hurt by the low empathy = pure evil rhetoric, and statements like those don’t actually challenge it. i feel like there’s a difference between ‘autistic people aren’t all low-empathy and it’s a spectrum for a reason’ and ‘autistic people aren’t all low empathy and Bad because most of us are Good and have high empathy’, one is harmful and the other is not.

sorry for the long ask btw, sending love <33

This is all fantastic, anon. <3 Thank you for sending in, I agree with you one hundred percent.

[notaplaceofhonour]

An open letter to the non-Palestinian gentiles yelling “From the River to the Sea”:

As someone who cares too deeply about the Palestinian cause to see it be derailed by association with antisemitic rhetoric & whose life is deeply impacted by the rhetoric Western (primarily non-Palestinian) leftists like you are embracing to listen to me.

There is a reason this phrase is associated with Hamas in Gaza rather than the government of the West Bank, and why both Palestinians & Jews who have been most actively involved in genuine inter-community peace activism & building solidarity with each other since long before October 7th do not use the phrase “From the River to the Sea”; this phrase is and has been from the moment it was coined in the 60s specifically & explicitly associated with the goal of destroying Israel & removing Jews from the land. Even the group that coined it (the PNC, part of the PLO) long ago retracted & disavowed the calls they made when they used this phrase. Anyone who has family in Israel or Gaza or the West Bank can tell you just how deeply the phrase “From the River to the Sea” is associated with groups like Hamas & PIJ, every bit as much as “Make America Great Again” is tied & associated with Reagan, Trump, and the American far-right or the swastika has become associated with Nazism (which, by the way, there is a direct line between Hamas cribbing so much of its rhetoric from propaganda the Nazis pumped into Palestine under Haj Amin al-Husseini & Nazis feeling comfortable with flashing swastikas at rallies with slogans so thoroughly associated with Hamas).

Like said rhetoric & iconography, it does not matter if you who are just entering this conversation intend it another way; your ignorance of this context—a half century of association with calls to ethnically cleanse & genocide Jews—is not an excuse. Just as much as if you throw water on a grease fire, the fact that you were trying to put it out will not matter; all you will do in that case is make the entire crisis that much worse. So please listen to the people telling you not to throw water on the grease fire.

If you as a third party to a deadly crisis that does not directly impact you actually care about helping, it is your responsibility above all when you insert yourself into that situation not to make things worse for the people who are actually impacted by it.

And by using a phrase which inflicts such visceral terror in so many Jews who hear it, which signals to the worst possible groups that you support their goal to eradicate Jews & emboldens them (whether that is what you had in mind & heart or not), and which gives the people who most want to crush the entire Palestinian liberation movement exactly the casus belli they need to do so on a silver platter—will only make matters worse for both Jews and Palestinians.

Stop using “From the River to the Sea”. I am begging y’all.

[spicyclover]

The accident that caused our love | Part one

Summary: You love him, and he loves you, but none of you dare to take the first step. However, this is the season's last race, and you are ready to find him to admit that you are in love with him, but it appears the universe decided to get in your way.

Hope you’ll enjoy this part. Let me know in the comments section! And to support me by tipping me!

Little information, I will, for now, only post on Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays.

Thank you, and Enjoy! :)

Lots of love, xxx Spicy Clover

This is the season's last race, and you just got to Abu Dhabi airport. Having missed your connection in Spain, you had to wait several hours before successfully boarding another plane.

Frustrated, you get your backpack in the cabin and run to get out once you get off the plane and through customs. All taxis are taken, and renting a car must take at least three hours. You then decide to take a motorcycle. «What could be so different from a car?» You said to yourself, taking the bike's keys in your hands.

You manage to get out of the parking lot without difficulty and finally arrive on the highway. You try to keep a reasonable speed, but time is running out, so you start slaloming between the cars as best you can. At the same time, you are not very comfortable on your bike because you must have driven what? Twice in your life.

You have about ten minutes before you get to the circuit when suddenly, you feel your bike derailed, and you lose control. The minutes slow down, and you try to figure out what’s happening. However, you don’t have time to think long enough that you’re rushing into the security fence at full speed.

The impact was so strong that you were immediately ejected from the vehicle. You glided head-first into the ravine and made a few rollovers before your head violently hit a piece of your motorcycle.

You’re losing consciousness, a lot of blood around you.

Fortunately for you, being close to the circuit, the dryers intervened quickly, and you could be taken to the hospital urgently.

In the meantime, Carlos has repeatedly tried to reach you by telephone. He begins to worry and no longer focuses on what his strategist tells him. He suddenly hears ambulances leaving in the distance. Surprised, he does not understand why the ambulances of the circuit leave towards the highway on the outskirts of the circuit.

A few minutes later, the FIA announced that the race would be delayed because of a severe accident. Carlos tries again to reach you, and the phone finally picks up.

“Allo?”

“Hermosa, where are you? I just heard there was a big accident. Are you okay?” Carlos quickly exclaims. 

“Who is this?” Said the voice once again.

“Carlos. Who are you?” He asks, confused. 

“I’m Khalid, a paramedic. I have the personal effects of one of the wounded. Can you tell me if she has any close family here?”

“She’s hurt?”

“I can’t revile any information to non-members of the family. Can you statues your relationship with my patient?”

“Am... am her boyfriend.”

“Okay, she’s in an ambulance toward Seha Emirates Hospital. You’ll be able to find her there with her belongings.” The paramedic finished and hung up the phone leaving Carlos speechless.

The garage went silent, listening to the conversation. Nobody dares to speak or even move, and only Charles comes to Carlos and takes him in his arms. Tears fall, and he can’t seem to process any information. Just lost in a loop of confusion and fear. 

After several minutes in comfort, Charles finally declared they were going to the hospital. The Ferrari manager doesn’t even have time to add anything. Charles gives him a black look and comes out of the garage holding Carlos by the shoulders.

The vast majority of the Paddock have heard about the accident, and everyone is learning about the victims of this one, which allows the two men to travel the way to Charles' car without any interest.

To be continued...

[cleromancy]

an underexplored aspect of red robin 26 (the one where he sets up a weeks-long rubes goldberg scheme to kill captain boomerang only to choke at the last minute) to me is the impact tim thought this would have on his place among the bats. like what he thought would happen *next.* because he absolutely did consider it and wasn't at all surprised by dick and bruce showing up afterwards to talk to him about the choices he made that day.

to start with. why now? there was no particular event that made him decide to do it. tim does say he heard harkness was trying to regain lost power, but in context its not reasoning behind his decision, it was an opportunity to kick his plan off.

and i think its fair to say tim was never gonna be able to go through with it. that was never gonna happen. but he *thought* he could, and he decided he was going to, despite repeatedly questioning what the hell he was doing. he explicitly makes the points that he thinks its wrong, he knows his dad wouldn't want him to, and he doesn't believe itll even be more emotionally satisfying than bringing harkness to justice. and yet thats still the plan! for weeks!

and he does set up an emotional failsafe for himself which he calls plausible deniability, where all he did was manipulate events so that he expects harkness to be killed by victor fries by the end of it.

except ofc when it comes down to it tim cant let fries kill a guy, which he takes to mean he wants to do it himself. any interesting moral questions here about who would potentially be at fault are very tidily sidestepped as irrelevant. bc i mean to tim they kind of are. his veneer of plausible deniability was always an excuse. the interesting thing here for the character is that this means he's willing to do away with that plausible deniability, and intends to follow through regardless. (i went back to delete some images bc i ran out, but he does explicitly say theres a change of plan and he's gonna kill harkness himself.)

this is the point he dispatches dr fries, which he calls in to 911, and follows harkness. bla bla confrontation bla, and harkness fuckin trips off the edge of the roof.

the implication here to me, with the way tims flashback is framed as an interruption and the way harkness goes from saying he has no idea who the hell tim is to saying tim doesn't have the stones, is that harkness was babbling this whole time, and that's just what actually makes it through to tims ears. and i also think the implication here is tim being like ".......heartbreaking: the worst person you know just made a great point." hes like shit! hes fucking right! i *dont* have the stones to do this!

anyway. the next page we have dickie and damian show up. hi boys!!

so to recap. tim decided he was going to murder harkness himself rather than using a proxy, *called 911 knowing the other bats would hear it,* and went off to do the deed.

(side note its always dickie loving hours in this house and. you just know dicks thinking of blockbuster here. oughe.) .....i also get the impression that dicks "timmy down the questionable-choices-well" senses were tingling somehow from the 911 call (which, i cannot stress this enough, only even mentioned fries), and i think him and damian most likely fucking hauled ass to get there, which is also fun to think about hehe

i have a lot of thoughts about whats going through dicks and tims heads here lol. but i want to get back to the point. this is the segue into the reveal that bruce was also there the whole time, he knows what tim had been planning to do, and now hes yelling at him for thinking about killing harkness at all.

AND THE COWL COMES OFF WHEEEEEEE :elmofire:

(ok actually i am going to derail here for a minute i gotta spell it out. tim kept it on when he was talking to dick bc he was lying to dick by omission. he wanted dick to think well of him, and he doesn't believe he earned the praise--most likely thinks dick would think less of him if he knew the extent to which tim had planned the whole thing. the end result--not killing harkness--does not, in tims mind, count. what dick was saying was "I understand how hard it was to not let him die, and i love you," and what tim heard was "i know you were always going to make the right choice, because you care about doing the right thing." and when you interpret it the way i do--that the deciding factor for tim was actually that he *couldn't* do it, not because he changed his mind? yeah, tims not gonna be looking dick in the eye anytime soon.)

but anyway. buce:

and the thing is that if you don't look at it from the *batshit* bruce-and-tim-mutual-god-complex perspective... tims actual non-thoughtcrime actions began and ended with a series of misdemeanors, no matter how successfully he arbitrated the end results. again any actual moral questions around hand crafting a bespoke scenario tailored to end in a mans murder by inciting another to kill him are completely sidestepped, bc to both tim and bruce its cut and dry; its just murder using another person as the weapon. tim never once actually believed the plausible deniability thing and there was no tangible difference to him btwn manipulating an intermediary, doing it himself, or even *just letting harkness go splat.* it was all fucking talking points for the sake of argument, he was preparing to play devils advocate against bruce to defend his own choice bc. this was always the endgame.

and

which like. i cant help but think of batman 424 bc, well, im the jason todd think-abouter:

and im officially out of images for this post but what happens next for tim is bruce flying away vs in jasons he tells bruce "i guess i spooked him. he slipped." and flies off in the back of a big silent panel of Angst Buce. i love how completely fucking opposite these scenarios were for the both of them but ykw actually thats its own fucking post.

all this just to say tim planned to murder a man in cold blood *fully knowing* dick and bruce would find out. tim can't even face dick when dick tells him he did good, and the confrontation with bruce feels almost like tim did the whole damn thing just to prove a point to bruce which is. hilarious bc it WORKED to that end even though tim did not actually kill anybody at all. like that was a pretty significant thing that happened. tim very much did not kill digger harkness.

(i also think its significant that this issue is like immediately after tim tries to give cass her batgirl outfit back and shes like "...No." and hes like "please i miss you so much 😭 just come back to gothammmm i dont care what name you go by you could even be black robin if you want that would be fun right cass we could be red robin and black robin together? no? what if we put your name first? ....no? .....okay just promise youll think about it... bye............" [paraphrased])

anyway. *holds tim drake up under the arms like simba* Perceive him

[wenellyb]

What’s your take on the hunch that the show (now that Buck is confirmed queer) is going to kill him off because he and Bobby have their final goodbye in the s7 finale? The show’s creators said that Eddie will go into s8 feeling isolated, and we know that Peter’s contract isn’t up for the show, so Bobby’s likely not dying. Does anyone know if Oliver’s contract is up??? I really hope they don’t give us a bury your gays trope 😫

Hi Anon!!!

I don't know anything about the actors contracts and I don't know where that rumor came from but I know for sure they won’t kill off Buck. If it were Grey's anatomy I would have a different answer but the 911 franchise don't kill off their Main Characters so "easily".

And I don't even why they would kill off Buck "now that he's confirmed Queer"...?????? It doesn't make sense. I would expect 911 Lone Star to kill off Nancy, or Tk, or Carlos, or Paul.

I'm not saying it couldn't happen in the future, and for sure something dramatic is going to happen before the end of the season, but I can already tell you if they kill off a Main Character it won't be Buck ( if Oliver contract was ending, and I don't know that that the case, they would find another of making him "leave").

Eddie feeling isolated could be for different reasons, and also feeling isolated isn't the same as being isolated.

I think his recent actions show that he's in a weird place and he might isolate himself in fear of being judged. Or he might be isolated because some of his friends won't approve his behavior. There are so many storylines the writers could come up with...

So here's the wild part, I never really thought about how Eddie might feel isolated, but this is how I imagined Eddie's recent storyline going.

I don't know if Eddie will keep seeing Shannon's lookalike or not, but going on a date was already cheating and I don't know if he'll confess or not, but Marisol will eventually hear about it and probably break things off.

We don’t know what Eddie and Marisol's relationship is at exactly, but we know that Marisol and Christopher are really close, we saw it the last episode, but we also heard that Marisol often babysits Chris when Eddie goes out with friends, and once did it twice in the same week. And finally, Eddie wouldn't have moved in with Marisol if he thought Chris would have the slighest problem with it (she moved out the same day, but the 1st decision was taken seriously and having Chris in mind).

So here's my wild theory, and bear with me.... I think that when Marisol and Eddie break up and Chris finds out it's his father fault.... He contact Marisol and run away to see her, I think he'll only stay a little, like Marisol will call Eddie to tell him that he's safe and tell him it's better if he stays the night because he was pretty upset. So even if Chris goes back home, he will still be mad at his father and won't talk to him (leading to Eddie feeling isolated).

If Christopher ever learns that his father cheated on Marisol with his mother's doppelganger, things might be even worse, he might leave to go live with Marisol for a while or with Buck.

I know this isn't your ask, but I'm sure Buck is safe (from being killed off, not from other dramatic events).

And your ask made me think of my theory and whataver the writers do with Eddie and Marisol's relationship I hope they explore the impact it has on Christopher because we've already seen that they're really close and anything. I hope the writers don't suddenly forget about it.

Sorry for derailing but your ask was the perfect opportunity to talk about this.

Btw, does anybody know anything about Olivier's contract?

[watchyourdigits]

I think Deacon isn't romanceable because he knows far more about Sole than he lets on at any point in time.

Hear me out.

I am genuinely convinced he eventually puts two and two together regarding their son being Father and whatnot. There was an amazing video on this (I'll link if I can find it ), which extrapolates on this via what we know from the canon. Sure, it's a little bit beyond what IS canon, but I don't think any of it is a far leap from reality/possible by any stretch of the imagination.

As for why he wouldn't reveal this to Sole, Deacon's whole thing is kind of just... watching. He does intel/spying for the Railroad, duh. I think he holds the same morals as wildlife videographers when shooting wildlife documentaries. In a weird kind of way, of course. Besides, who is he to play God with his knowledge?

I don't think he's a believer in fate/destiny. I do, however, think he understands that if he were to intervene in such a huge manner, he'd utterly derail the entire momentum that Sole has going for them. Hell, who knows if they wouldn't just give up after learning all of that.

And that's IF Sole were to even believe a word that comes out of his mouth, which they have no reason to. He would definitely take that into account as well. AND It isn't logical for him to reveal/otherwise do anything with this information because who does it help?

On the other side of the coin, you have a man who possesses such in-depth knowledge of Sole before they even emerge from the vault (up to 4 years of research done beforehand, per the video I watched that compiled canon - WILL FIND, JUST REMIND ME). I don't think it's possible for him to be romanced because there's no way to write that without it being manipulative in one way or another, whether intentional or not. I wish I had better words to describe it, but there's something about that dynamic that doesn't sit right.

I wouldn't go so far as to say he's a stalker and THAT'S why it's bad, but there's something about having so much IMPACTFUL info about someone that they aren't aware of that makes them easy to take advantage of.

I LOVE Deacon, and I also wish he was romanceable because jfc I'm horribly down bad for that man and his sexy ginger eyebrows. And I don't think Bethesda even thought that much into it when deciding not to make him romanceable. Let's be real here, they do NOT get credit for that happy accident.

Anyway, this is a bit of mind-spew as to why I feel like it makes sense that he isn't romanceable. Have a nice day! :)

UPDATE: this is the video I was referring to

[irithnova]

Seeing as this myrddin blocked me and is now spreading baseless accusations about me being a Russian agent.

This is in reference to my post in which I explain using historical detail why it is incorrect to say that Mongols are ancestors/direct ancestors to Russians. I explain why it is not only incorrect to say this, but it also has the potential to harbour harmful rhetoric about Mongolians, Russians, and Eastern Europeans as a whole, as this pseudo-history is rooted in racial science and is used to spread slavophobia and anti Mongolian sentiment.

Here is my original post, please go and read it for yourself:

I explained that yes, the Mongols/Golden horde did have a lasting impact impact on Russian history, culture and identity, and it is important to acknowledge their contributions. But I also explained how the Mongol invasions did not include mass migration and assimilation of Mongol populations into Eastern European (compared to the other Khanates) and the Mongols were essentially a ruling elite - an outside force coming in.

I explained how people often exaggerate Mongol influence on Russia/Eastern Europe for more sinister reasons. I said how the core of Russian culture is Slavic, and how many different cultures have had an impact on the course of Russian history. I explained why it is important not to exaggerate Mongol influence on Russia/Eastern Europe to the extent that people run around saying how Mongols are ancestors to them, as it is not historically sound and is rooted in racial science/slavophobia.

The idea that Eastern Europeans in general are not "true Europeans" and are really just "Mongol mongrels" is not exactly a new concept. However there has been a surge of popularity in hurling the term "Mongol", "Mongol Hordes" as an insult towards Russians. Do you... Not see how this is a problem? Not only is it incredibly, incredibly racist towards the Mongolian people, to use their ethnic term to denote "barbaric", "backwards" or "savage", as I want to reiterate, this rhetoric has its origins in Nazi racial science, and is also slavophobic.

I said that the core of Russian culture is Slavic. Nowhere, in my post, did I ever dabble in debating on whether Russia is the direct heir or descendant to Kievan Rus', nor did I use this as a justification to label, Ukrainians as Nazis for wanting to defend their country from the Russian invasion, nor did I then go onto use this to justify a "denazification" of Ukraine.

If you take a look at my account, you can see that I am extremely critical of the Russian state.

Also I just think it's so... Typically American to accuse people you don't like of being a Russian agent lol.

In my post, I added this screenshot of someone tweeting anti-Mongolian sentiment in order to give an example of how pseudo-history and racial science gives way for anti-Mongolian sentiment to rear it's ugly head :

I was not calling a Ukrainian a Nazi for criticising Russia - this person is not even Ukrainian judging by his Irish name.

Even if this person was a Ukrainian, does that give them a right to throw around anti-Mongolian sentiment?? Do Ukrainians have free reign to hurl around the word "Mongol" like it's an insult and perpetuate harmful racial science??

I love how myrddin suddenly started Mongolia posting - pretending like they give a fuck about Mongolian culture, history and people, but then goes ahead and derails a post talking about anti-Mongolian sentiment and racial science and turns it into some fucking debate about Russia being or not being the heir of Kievan Rus when I NEVER EVEN SAID SHIT ABOUT THAT IN MY ORIGINAL POST. I EVEN SAID THAT MANY DIFFERENT CULTURES HAD A LASTING IMPACT ON THE COURSE OF RUSSIA'S HISTORY, IDENTITY AND CULTURE, AND I WASN'T TRYING TO SQUEEZE RUSSIA INTO A BOX OF "WHITE, SLAVIC" FOR THE SAKE OF MY ARGUMENT.

ALL I DID WAS EXPLAIN WHY IT IS IMPORTANT TO BE CAREFUL ABOUT EXAGGERATING MONGOL INFLUENCE TO THE POINT WHERE Y'ALL CALL MONGOLS ANCESTORS TO RUSSIANS WHEN ITS BOTH HISTORICALLY INACCURATE AND USED FOR OFFENSIVE RHETORIC

Myrddin - can you even read? 🤭

@myrddin-wylt

[worldsentwined]

oooo 1, 7 and 17!!! what fascinating questions!!

Right?? These questions are fascinating but they are also COMING FOR ME SO HARD hahahaha

1. what are 3 things you’d say shaped you into who you are? Here is another one for my therapist lol, I feel like I am in a constant state of picking apart what made me Like This. In a fun turn of events, I now have 3 asks in my inbox and all of you asked this question, so each of you is going to get one third of this answer in your ask. So here's Thing Number One!

First and most Obviously Traumatic is getting diagnosed with type 1 diabetes at age 10, which has had a huge impact on how I think and how I manage my life. Pros: this has wired my brain to Stay On Top Of Things* and go to the doctor regularly and create routines that will support my overall health etc etc. I'm very good at managing it, to the point that I don't even realize how much extra work I'm doing until someone points it out, and it also makes me predisposed to handle other things in a similar way. Cons: if any piece of this careful system gets disrupted (lose my job and therefore health insurance, forget to pick up a prescription, insulin pump breaks**, etc) I WILL DIE. Or at least, some of these things could kill me, so that is what my anxiety tells me whenever anything disruptive happens. Additional con, I have SO much anxiety. Apparently this is what happens when your brain has to do the job of your pancreas. *while typing this last night I realized something had gotten Very Fucked Up with my insulin pump supply order, which so derailed me that I had to save this as a draft and come back to it a day later. Which gives a bad impression of the competence I'm describing, but the supplier for my insulin pump supplies is so incompetent that it negates all of my efforts on a regular basis. **my insulin pump breaking and the ensuing anxiety spiral around choosing a new one is the thing that finally got me to find a therapist. Which, thank god I did, but still.

7. what scares you the most and why? I didn't mean for the last question to segue into this when I started answering it, but see above for one of the top contenders. I'm afraid of a lot of things, to the point where I can't often articulate what specifically scares me about a situation, but "catastrophic failure of the medical device keeping me alive" is pretty clear-cut. The fact that I've been through it once and survived it does not seem to help. I do actually have contingency plans in place in the event of something like that happening again (I have to keep a whole separate kind of insulin around that I keep throwing away without using it just in case my pump breaks and I have to go back to injections. Which makes me furious, but that's another post) but it's still terrifying.

17. name 3 things that make you happy Thank god this question is last haha, I need to recover from the first two.

Singing! And music in general, but getting to be Part Of The Music is a nice bonus. It has been really good to have a group of people to sing with on a regular basis, and now that I live by myself I can just wander around the house singing whenever I want.

Going for walks in the park. I was so mad when I accidentally tricked myself into having a regular exercise routine a few years ago (this was also for diabetes anxiety related reasons) but yeah it turns out that going outside for my silly little lunch break walk is good for my mood as well as my blood sugar. Also sometimes I get asked for directions by tourists and it feels nice if I can actually help them.

Weirdly specific one, but people remembering my dietary restrictions (have to eat gluten free in addition to being diabetic) and cooking me food or choosing a restaurant to accommodate them without having to be reminded. Some of my friends (who cook a lot of stir fry and other rice-based stuff) keep a bottle of tamari around specifically so they can use it instead of soy sauce if I'm coming over.

[shahdraws]

Kaveh - Genshin Impact

I’m once again about to write paragraphs upon paragraphs about a Persian-coded character in Genshin Impact! This time including a golden hour portrait of our favorite architect, Kaveh!

Disclaimer: everything I’m writing about is from a Zoroastrian-raised, Persian perspective, and are not reflective of the views of the SWANA region as a whole. If you have a differing perspective on something in this post, please feel free to drop a comment or chat with me in my messages!

Characterization

Like I said in my post about Nilou, there is a heavy emphasis placed on the Zoroastrian philosophy of “The Asha” - Good thoughts, Good words, and Good deeds- in Kaveh’s characterization. There are plenty of instances in which Kaveh has been shown to willingly sacrifice personal gain for the sake of his ideals, such as his rescue of the foxes caught in a ley line disturbance during the Interdarshan Championship, his rejection of Sachin’s estate and research, his effort to rebuild the Palace of Alcazarzaray free of charge after the original was destroyed by a withering zone, and, most infamously, Al-Haitham’s voiceline about his purchase of a dozen keychains from a charity pledging to provide for children in poverty.

It speaks volumes on his relationship with Al-Haitham that he is at ease enough to engage in arguments with his friend and roommate, while engaging in a practice known as Tar’of with everyone else- that is, to engage in an act of refusing some gestures out of politeness, (i.e., not letting Faruzan donate her points in the Interdarshan championship to him in the first round, trying to prevent Cyno from reimbursing him for the gift of a rare and valuable TCG card, and insisting on treating the entire group to a meal despite his overall financial situation) (yes, this is a thing; arguments to pay the bill get very intense sometimes). In any case, for an interpersonal relationship to not be subject to the general rules of tar’of, it implies that despite all the arguing, Kaveh is very close with Al-Haitham.

While a reasonable amount of Kaveh’s actions with regards to the culture of Tar’of may be attributable to a sense of guilt, the overall impression is that Kaveh is making an effort to appear well-mannered to his colleagues by standards of his culture and upbringing.

Clothing

As many have already noticed, Kaveh’s design is based off of the Huma (Homa) bird, an Iranian mythical creature known to never cease flight, and to bestow fortune upon those in need; Personally, I love this detail of Kaveh’s design, since it ties in so well with his personality and lore.

Like Faruzan, Kaveh wears a shirt that resembles a Sedreh, a garment worn by Zoroastrian practitioners who are of age to have undergone the Sedreh-pooshi ceremony. While Sumeru’s religion may differ from the Persian religious practices of the real world, the representation of Sedreh is subtle and much appreciated nod to the indigenous cultures and religions of both ancient and modern Persians.

While Kaveh doesn’t practice any sort of head covering, it does appear that he uses some hair clips to keep his hair tied back, which is also deemed an acceptable method of keeping loose hairs from falling during prayer or ceremonies by Zoroastrian standards.

Overall Thoughts

I think Kaveh’s character is extremely relatable, as a young-ish Persian trying to get my shit together and getting derailed at almost every turn lol

I think Kaveh is one of Genshin Impact’s most human characters; despite his efforts to adhere to his ideals, his struggles are very similar to those of regular people, rather than the gods, demigods, politicians, Michelin-star chefs, and pop-stars that make up the rest of the cast of Genshin Impact. While I love all the characters we have met and befriended along our journey, I think it is just kind of refreshing to see a character who is just a regular guy, working a regular job with a realistic amount of successes and failures, who happens to be somewhat down on his luck.

All things considered, I don’t think he is breaking any religious or moral rules of Persian or Zoroastrian philosophy, so he is decent representation of both, in my books.

[drill-teeth]

Some people genuinely can’t figure out the difference between “accusing someone of faking a disability” and “a disabled person pointing out the symptom you described doesn’t match the words you’re using for it”. And it’s really fucking uncomfortable and results in a shit ton of ableist behavior.

I’ve noticed lots and lots of self diagnoses that are extremely under-researched. I’ve noticed a lot of people who don’t fundamentally understand the symptoms and conditions they are saying they have just in general. And I’m not saying they have no symptoms at all. I’m not saying we shouldn’t take people seriously. Our society does way too much disbelieving people (especially already marginalized people) about their health. And I do approach things in good faith and believe people when they tell me they struggle and tell me about their symptoms.

I’m just finding it harder and harder to have discussions with people about when the experience and symptoms they are describing to me doesn’t fit the terms they’re using. And I’m not trying to dismiss or invalidate them at all. Their symptoms and struggle are still worth taking seriously. But the second I say “you should probably do some more research and read more articles by people who have (condition)” they act like I don’t believe them at all. And that’s not true.

And the reason I bring this up is because this inability to have a good faith discussion with other people about the way symptoms impact people has hurt me and other people I know. I’ve talked with people who say they have memory loss who understand it as being forgetful in their daily life (which is still a symptom to take seriously) who are harsh on me for my huge gaps in my long term memory. And it’s genuinely devastating to hear someone say they understand the “memory loss struggle” and then immediately get frustrated with me for not recalling how we met or an event we went to together. And that’s not even the only symptom or condition I have that people have refused to be understanding about while saying they know the experience.

Again I don’t think fake claiming is good. It’s not. Self diagnosing is an important part of treating your own health. Especially when you’re someone doctors already don’t take seriously like a person of color, LGBT+, afab, fat, multiple of those at once, and etc. I just noticed more and more people becoming hostile with me for trying to have a good faith discussion with them about disability in general.

This was a bit less organized than I intended, but I’ll summarize it like this. Disabilities are by definition disabling. They impact the ability to function. And I’m meeting more and more people who don’t seem to fully understand that and are quick to snap on me when I say I can’t remember something or I can’t get up off my bed because the pain is so intense or make fun of me when I don’t understand a tone or a joke. And saying “no this specific symptom is generally more intense or different than how you’re describing it” gets disabled people who want to provide a better understanding of disability harassed out of spaces. ESPECIALLY spaces that are supposed to be “disability friendly” for trying to educate about the experiences people are literally describing to them.

This post is about the harassment of disabled people in “accepting spaces” for trying to educate about conditions and symptoms. Do not derail.