#the persistent feeling in them of wanting to save every person around them even though its literally impossible

[mall0w-rambles]

please tell me its not just me

[fishsinsareacknowledged]

CAN WE HAVE HANAHAKI DISEASE AU OF ANY COD SHIP YOU WANT?

We doin selfship cause I'm eepy like that.

Krueger/Nikto/And Reader where they all have crushes on each other but know damn well they can't confess to their coworker who also has their asses in every motherfucking mission.

When did they start having crushes you may ask?

Nikto- for Nikto/Krueger he fell in love over a long course of time and trust. Knowing he was fucked the moment that he accepted an invitation with Krueger to go to a bar outside of work. Just the two of them.

"We should go drinking again, this is fun." [Krueger was enjoying the silence fr.]

For Nikto/Reader he would fall I love with you maybe around the same time. Knowing he was double fucked when he saw you saving his crazy ass post mission in the middle of a breakdown. As if it all fell into place.

"Can you breathe? One, two, one, two, just like that. Keep it up." [You'd have scars on your arms from this]

He would confess shortly after his first petals, finding it a distraction and a motivator. Two birds with one stone, he called it as he confessed to the two of you. Trying to act nonchalant as if he didn't make a whole bouquet of flowers before he confessed.

In reality the first time he saw those petals He was stunned. Perplexed even. But he knew exactly who it was. The both of you. Blue petals and red. There was no mistaking it, one color a person they say.

He confessed in around three months when the flowers wouldn't stop blooming every time he woke. Shaking him awake with a neverending cough and covering his whole bed in them as he collected them. Never throwing them away, knowing that it would catch too much attention. Bright red and blue.

Krueger- For Krueger/Nikto he caught feelings early on. The man got saved by Nikto one mission and practically just stayed in his shadow after all that. Not even bothering to talk to his own teamates. The moment he saw even a glimpse of Nikto he would just walk over there, as if he belonged there.

"Stop following me, fucking rat." [Is that a fucking challenge?]

The flowers for Nikto bloomed slowly, never overbearing but persistent. Until it all became too much with your added flowers. Such bright orange and red, even he was perplexed at how bright the colors were. An old Austrian tale that the more vibrant the colors, the more the person "matches" you. Nonetheless, he got confessed to near the moment it started getting itchy to breathe.

Even though he's had the crush for longer, his was slower and much much more bearable as the flowers were small, like dandelions. He started getting tired of it when there were whole dandelions flowers in his throat. Having to cough them out quietly in the middle of the night as they got lodged in his throat. He started fearing what would happen if it turned into whole dandelion pappus, planning his confession already the moment he saw a seed.

For Krueger/Reader he didn't even realize he fell in love with you until Nikto pulled the both of you away in the middle of the night. The man weary and tired, breathing as if he was impaled. Then he pulled out a bouquet of gardenias, the same shade of color mixed in with the most vibrant of blues.

"I- Christ how do we work this out?- three people into this?- I don't think that was ever recorded." [It has, they're just as confused]

And it never will. All of you keeping the relationship a secret with good care and trust. And mostly the lack of care of the higher ups, aka König. Not even raising an eye, or caring to, when he saw the forced leave addresses being the same.

"You fucking crazy shitheads better take your fucking leave seriously for once, if I hear a fucking note or report that you three doing a side mission during a leave I am going to force another one. On house arrest."

He honestly thought that the three of you were planning to do some bullshit. His clowns, not his circus anymore once you were on leave.

Eitherway, the flowers would be collected in some sort of jar. All of them. Blue, red, and orange mixed yet divided piled up on one another. Squeezed tightly into that little jar hanging off a shelf. A mix of healthy bluebells, dandelions, and gardenias.

The lasting affects of the Hanahaki did persist. Mostly to Krueger and Nikto as you coughed yours out fully intact and inside out when they exited. Petals would form when you two were away for too long but as the love was already requited it wouldn't be too bad.

Until Krueger started coughing out dandelion seeds and you had to drive him to the ICU because Nikto was gone for too long one mission. You honestly thought that the seeds were red because of blood and not the disease when he emptied out a full paper bag of them.

"Hah- I don't need to go to the hospital, Schatz- Just- give me a moment to breathe- i-"

Yeah you weren't going to fall for his bullshit. He was still hacking up seeds the moment you arrived to the hospital. Only somewhat breathing normally once they put him on a respirator.

"This is fucking embarrassing. Don't tell Nikto about this or I swear."

Yeah he was fine once you called Nikto, making the man quickly finish the mission and return before sunset. Finally discharging Krueger with a pack of oxygen to keep at home and a hissy Krueger.

"I told you I didn't need help, Schatz- this is- so fucking embarrassing."

"I've missed you too."

Yeah they quiet up quickly after that. Especially since the blush on their faces could combat the redness of your petals.

[aishangotome]

Azel Radwan: Unless You Know Love

From A Hidden Oath: King of the BEAST (2024 Election) - Collection Event

---

(Ah, as I thought... I was right to come and see.)

A crowd had gathered on the desert sea trade route - the caravan's path connecting towns and cities.

Judging by the way they were pitching tents and making a fuss, it seemed like an unwelcome problem had arisen.

I pasted a smile on my expressionless face. As I stepped closer through the sand, people noticed the god and bowed their heads.

Azel: Is something troubling you?

Caravan Member: Oh, Living God! Please save this woman.

Caravan Member: She collapsed in the middle of the trade route. She seems to be barely conscious.

(That's not good.)

I made my way through the crowd and entered the tent.

Lying on a cloth was the foreign woman I had been meeting frequently lately.

She was a woman brought in as an assistant by the merchant I had been working with, and also a slave of the god, burdened with debt and forced to work.

(It's fortunate she was picked up by the caravan.)

Azel: Could you give me some water?

Caravan Member: Yes! I'll bring it right away.

I lifted her body, loosened her clothes, and forced her to drink the water that was handed to me.

Fortunately, she seemed to have the energy to drink, and her throat moved up and down slowly.

I wiped the water that dripped from the corner of her mouth with my sleeve, and her eyes gradually came into focus.

Emma: ...Huh... Azel...sama?

Azel: You've come to. How are you feeling?

Emma: ...Bad...

Azel: I thought so. It seems you're suffering from the heat.

I placed my hand on her forehead, and her body temperature hadn't cooled down yet.

(It's too hot here... This is troublesome, but should we change locations?)

The surrounding caravan members gasped as I lifted the woman, who seemed unable to walk on her own, with one arm.

Caravan Member: Living God! We will--

Azel: No, don't worry about it. You were about to head out for business, weren't you?

(I'll thank them for picking her up, but I don't want them to follow me because they're annoying.)

I flicked a gold coin from my pocket and handed it to the caravan man.

Azel: Here's some money for the water. May your journey be blessed, you kind and devout people.

As I left the tent, saying whatever came to mind, I heard the cheers of the foolishly grateful people behind me.

-

Emma: It's cold! It's strange, even though it's a desert.

Azel: ...It's nice to be a carefree child, isn't it?

The woman, who had been on the verge of death just a few minutes ago, was frolicking in an oasis rarely visited by people. I sat in the shade of a tree and watched her lift the hem of her skirt and enter the lake, for no particular reason.

(Despite almost dying, this carefree attitude is a kind of talent.)

Emma: Would you like to join me, Azel-sama?

Azel: Unlike you, I'm a sensible adult.

Emma: But it feels good.

(...It would be creepy if I frolicked around.)

The woman turned around, stepping through the water, seemingly unconcerned.

Emma: Oh, right. Thank you for saving me.

Azel: Indeed. If you're going to collapse, at least give me a warning first.

Emma: That's impossible...

Azel: It's not impossible. You didn't get enough sleep today, did you?

Emma: H-How did you know...?

Azel: Because I'm a god.

(Who was it that was so excited about finding an interesting book yesterday?)

Azel: Don't come when you're not feeling well, it's a nuisance.

Emma: ...I'll keep that in mind.

Emma: But I was surprised. That you, Azel-sama, saved me.

Azel: Don't make me sound like a cold-hearted person.

Emma: But you actually are, aren't you? Oh, could it be, an exorbitant fee--

(Ah, I forgot.)

(It's troublesome to ask for money every single time, but...)

Azel: If you insist, then fine, show me your sincerity.

Azel: We have to rewrite the loan agreement, don't we?

Emma: That's all you ever talk about, Azel-sama.

Azel: I'm apparently a cold-hearted man in your mind.

Emma: ... And on top of that, persistent.

Azel: I see. I understand. I'll add on compensation for emotional distress due to the insults.

Emma: Th-That was a compliment!

Azel: How? You idiot.

Emma: ... Ugh... Why are you so obsessed with money even though you're a prince and a god?

(I've never said I'm obsessed with money, though...)

(... I suppose it's okay if she misunderstands.)

Azel: Want to know?

Emma: ... If I say I want to know, you'll probably charge me, so I'll hold back.

Azel: That's too bad.

(Rather than needing money, I need you to keep hating me.)

Women are valuable as slaves because they are a kind of atheist who don't see god as god.

I'd love to have such a person around, but my only concern is that she's a "woman."

Most of the time, women start talking about love and romance, which becomes troublesome.

However, at least, the woman innocently frolicking in the oasis shows no signs of such clinginess.

It seems she's come to recognize me as a greedy, scheming god, which is a promising start.

Emma: Ah, w-whoa…!

The woman fell on her backside into the lake, having tripped over something.

A violent splash of water flew up, soaking her completely.

Azel: ...I've never seen a woman look so unappealing even when wet.

Emma: That's just because you have no taste, Azel-sama!

Azel: Insulting me again---

Emma: Achoo...

(...)

With a sigh, I tossed the cloth I was holding to her.

Emma: I'm sorry... Thank you.

Azel: My kindness comes at a price.

Emma: ...I know.

Azel: Work hard. At least enough to repay the help I gave you.

(As long as you don't know love, I might keep you by my side and help you sometimes.)

(But...)

(If I sense even a hint of "that," I'll get rid of you immediately.)

FIN

[doggoboigaugau]

Stray dog (Part 6)

Part 1 / 2 / 3 / 4 / 5

Pairings: Ghost x Soap x Male Reader

Summary: Soap goes to see Male Reader after the incident between him and Ghost.

Word count: 2033

Warning: none.

You know you’ve fucked up. Losing control over your own actions and unleashing your emotions on your L.T. in front of everyone. Now you’ll be seen as a liability. If they’re kind enough, they may cross your name out of the upcoming mission and will take care of you later after the mission is over, and if not, they can get rid of you, making you transfer elsewhere and then you will have to start from scratch again, trying to build relationships with new faces while coping with the strange circumstances. Not that you are anything near as close with the other men of the 141 as they are to each other, but at least they’ve been around you enough to understand you to a certain extent and will let you have a leeway occasionally with the meetings or the paper works when they notice you’re not really OK for those seemingly effortless errands. With new people? You probably will have to shut your mouth and forget about your own emotional needs pretty usually so as not to be the center of disdain and labeled as an incompetent outcast.

As these thoughts run through your mind like midnight trains that seemingly carry with them the hope and dream of a lone onlooker into the pitch darkness, you sit in your room, door is locked, all windows are closed shut, with hands covering your face. You dread the thought of having to adapt to a new environment with new people so much that you think if the worst-case scenario ever happens, you will just end it all to save yourselves from further suffering and your stupid, unrealistic expectations. 

What kind of expectations specifically? Well, you’ve never created a positive impression on any other teams before the 141 since you’re always that timid, reversed, and obviously mentally struggling pathetic wet blanket that stayed in the corner every meeting. No one wanted to talk to you or spend their precious leisure time with you because no one wanted to waste their time on a depressed little shit, or get heavily attached to by a crybaby that demanded their attention 24/7 or else he’d think he was worth nothing to them. Therefore, whenever you received the news that you’d be transferred to a new team, you always expected a new chance to be a different person. You would always try to muster all your courage and all the…qualities closest to extroversion inside you (if it ever exists) with the hope that this new team could be different. You would present them with a more optimistic, outgoing, and attractive picture of yourself, and they would remember to include you in everything, like some silly card games, some sparring bets, or simply just listing your name along with theirs when they plan to do something. You thought the feeling of loneliness and isolation that you used to feel among your old teammates would end. You thought you would stop feeling so invisible. 

Technically, you do achieve these things while being with the 141, although you’re still the depressed, pathetic boy that refuses to open up for fear of your expectations not being lived up to; it’s your coping mechanism: you’d rather have nothing after all than risk being hurt. The 141 consists of kind and considerate men; they all have their secret, traumatic background stories so they understand that sometimes you need your time alone to process your own emotions without even having to know the exact reasons why; they always include you in everything they do, and it warms your heart every time they call out your name and insist on you going with them to different places. Still, one problem persists though, which is the inevitable fact that you have grown so attached to them that you feel impossible to ever have to leave. Even the thought of it makes your heart sink and your stomach lurch. It makes you feel physically sick. What’s worse is you probably mean nowhere near as significant to them as they are to you, which is a truth you cannot escape but still try so hard to ignore.

It was about some hours after the incident when someone knocked on your door. You try to stay as quiet as possible, even going as far as holding your breath so that whoever is on the other side of the door will think you’re not inside or you’re sleeping and will go away. 

“I know you’re inside, and I know you’re not sleeping, Y/n.”  Soap says with an unusually stern voice.

You groan loudly and stand up. Upon opening the door, you’re greeted with the sight of a big, angry Scottish man crossing his arms in front of his chest, his arm muscles stiffening. Apparently, he is here because of the stuff between you and Ghost. A thought suddenly crosses your mind, as you wonder what it would feel like if you also had someone who cared about you that much. It must feel nice. You think despairingly to yourself, though on the outside, you still keep that expressionless face before Soap.

“What do you want?” 

“What do I want?” Soap scoffs, “Do you realize the dire situation you’re in right now?”

“Of course I do, you think I’m an idiot?” You grimace, feeling the indignation building up inside you again while the jealousy is burning your organs.

“Then why did you ask me that question?” Soap almost screams at your face.

Something suddenly snaps inside you, and you growl like a hurt animal, “YOU ALL WILL KICK ME OUT ANYWAY, SO WHY BOTHER?”

The Scott is obviously taken aback by your emotional explosion, his eyes widen and he takes one step back, “What do you mean by…kicking you out?”

“What’s else besides kicking me out of this team? Isn’t it obvious?” Your chest rises and falls noticeably as you feel like a combination of violent emotions is choking your throat. Anger, jealousy, despair, regret, hopelessness,... the worst-case scenario is so close to stopping being a scenario as you are actively making it truly happen. You scoff at yourself when the Scott is still trying to come up with the right words, a term that you despise so much suddenly pops up in your mind. Self-fulfilling prophecy. You despise that term with all your heart because you feel like whoever coined it and whoever uses it is blaming you, the person who has suffered so much in the past and is the victim of his own circumstances, for not being able to break the cycle yourself. How can anyone expect a deeply wounded soul to save itself? How can they expect right from the start that the soul knows how to achieve such a feast? 

“Y/n…we’ve never planned to kick you out…” Soap carefully speaks with his softest voice possible, aware that acting impulsively right now will probably result in catastrophic consequences that can never be undone.

“It’s either today or some day in the future. It’s inevitable.” You coldly say.

“Why? Why are you so sure that we’ll get rid of you sooner or later?” Soap asks, clearly puzzled by your certitude. 

“BECAUSE I’M REPLACEABLE!” You scream again, this time your heart feels like it’s being ripped open by all the overwhelming emotions which have been bottling up inside you ever since you, as a little boy, became known of what loneliness was. All the questions ‘why no one wants to play with me?’, ‘why am I always alone?’, ‘what do they have that I don’t?’,...‘what is wrong with me?’ and all the memories of how you always stood from far away, watching the kids laughing and playing with each other, or when you were on the street getting to your destination, and you suddenly stopped just to look at a group of young people sharing with each other about their normal days and talking about the new cool song they came across on a social app. The feelings that dominated your senses at those time are hard to describe. They are a mix of jealousy because you knew those people had what you’d never have, despair because you realized who you inherently were was the reason why you’re never meant for such relationships, hopelessness because you had come to terms with that loss, and, strangely, nostalgia. Nostalgia because you used to be in a couple of relationships that could’ve become the same as theirs, like what was going on between you and Fyodor, and you missed those feelings. You missed the touch, the care, and the fire. You missed the person you could’ve become.

“I am replaceable, alright? It has always been like this! Always! I’m nothing to any of you. I’ve always been nothing to every. Fucking. One!” Before you know it, tears are welling up in your eyes and your tough, emotionless facade collapses in front of Soap, revealing the broken, sensitive, and wounded boy behind. You collapse on the floor as well, your legs and one of your arms support to prevent you from hitting yourself against the cold cemented surface, while your other arm cover your shameful face as you cry like a baby in front of one of the greatest soldiers of the base. 

“Just go.” You say between your pathetic cries as you try to swing your door shut when still crawling on the floor. 

To your surprise, however, the man grabs the door to prevent you from closing it, he does this with so much force that the veins bulge on the back of his hand.

“What the–?”

“Listen to me, Private Y/n.” Soap grunts through his clenched teeth. “We have never thought of you that way. You’re not replaceable to us. You. Are. Important, alright? We can never get rid of your ass because we love you so much, like a real family. Am I understood??”

You looks up at the angry Scottish with your widened brown eyes, still the same innocent, puppy eyes that followed his every step when you’re first transferred to the base of the 141. Soap looks at those eyes and immediately the rage ignited inside him dies out. How can he be angry at you? How can he be angry at those eyes? The man kneels down and pulls you into a big embrace. His warm, large hand rub your back and you can feel his heart beats wildly as your chests touch each other. 

“This is how you have been feeling all this time?” Soap asks, his voice rumbles. You flinch a little as his warm breath tickles the sensitive skin on your neck. It feels so strange to be this close to someone.

“This is how you felt that night, after we arrived at the base from the bar? When you stood alone in the parking lot? When you spent the whole day training without eating? This is how you feel all the time with us?” 

You cannot reply. Instead, you are clinging on to him as if you’re clinging for your dear life, screaming into his shoulder. Your fingers sink deeply into his clothes, wanting to make use of any other ways to release the powerful tensions within yourself besides screaming your heart out.

“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry you feel this way. It’s okay, I’m here now, baby. I’m here now.” Soap keeps pouring sweet words of solace and affirmation into your ears as you let all of the suppressed emotions out. Both of you know that this isn’t the end, your pain and deep-seated traumas will not be magically healed right after this embrace just because you finally have the courage to talk about it with someone. But it is enough for now. Soap is proud of you. He is proud because, either deliberately or not, you have decided to open up. Maybe getting help wasn’t what you thought you’d gain when you screamed words deep inside your heart to him a few moments earlier, but this presents a new beginning, a beginning to a life where you believe that you can actually have what you thought you’d never have. And you deserve it. All of it.

To be continued... (dang, when will I be able to finish this?)

Taglist: @justdawn @killmeprettypleasee @livelaugh-light @therealppboy @arthurmorgansballsack @redjeanjacket @gay-as-hell-blog @b0g-b0y @somothegraffitiartist @kodasstar @teippirulla @aphroditeslovr @peter-the-pan @wvandahoe @c0nny3917 @talia-the-gemini

[maleyanderecafe]

My Cute Stalker Idolizes Me Too Much (Manga)

Created by: Shirizaki

Genre: Smut/Josei

Every now and then I get blessed with a submissive yandere boy and it's always the best feeling- it's like finding a golden egg or an extra piece of candy in your pocket. Anyways, the yandere in this one is a lovestruck stalker and the tone is fairly light, and the female lead is the one who initiates which is great. There is only about three chapter out so far but it is very cute.

The story starts out with Izumi being annoyed that a boy named Kai is following her. She continuously rejects him as he has been basically following her around since high school. She likes a different type than what Kai is, but her friend mentions that she's been having trouble with dating and suggests she try dating Kai. Izumi asks out Kai on a date, and sees that Izumi actually has quite a knack for taking care of children, something that Izumi finds attractive. We get to learn about why Kai is so in love with Izumi, as Izumi saved him from bullies when he was younger. The two start a trial dating, however, Izumi gets frustrated as Kai isn't making any moves. As a result, she invites Kai to her place and pushes him down to have sex, only for Kai to pass out as he's overwhelmed. The next day, Kai asks his friend Eiji for advice on how to initiate, pointing out that Kai still sees her more as a goddess rather than an actual person, which is one of the main reasons that Kai wasn't initiating in the first place. Eiji ends up being attracted to Izumi when he sees her, causing Kai to feel insecure as Eiji is also basically Izumi's type. Kai and Izumi end up having sex at his place this time, but Kai attempts to initiate. Izumi ends up taking over instead, leading as Kai still seems to be nervous. The two don't actually have sex, but their relationship gets closer. Izumi tries to deny that she likes him, however, but seems to really like him. She ends up meeting Eiji as she's ordering pizza, and Eiji even later goes up to her to confess his feelings (even saying that if she doesn't like Kai, she should just dump him which like... wtf). Izumi ends up rejecting Eiji declaring her love for Kai and afterwards Kai and Izumi have sex. At the end of this chapter, the two of them move in with them, with him being obsessed with her as always.

So again, very cute story, I like how it's playing out so far. The female lead is pretty cool because while it does take the friend pushing her to try new things, so does at least try to go through with them, though like a lot of female protags with yanderes, she tends to be a bit annoyed that he has all of these stalking tendencies. I'm always a fan of more assertive females anyways and considering this is a josei (and most joseis don't have assertive females as far as I can tell) it is a god send for me.

Kai on the other hand is a pretty light yandere all things considered. He's like a mix of a stalker and a worshipper type yandere which I feel is pretty common in more lighter submissive yanderes, though he takes the worshipper part of it to a higher level than most, not wanting to be taint her. He does learn to see her more as a person as the story goes on, but I imagine that's not something that will go away completely for a while. He is very persistent in his love for her initially though in the end it's Izumi that initiates first (mostly in sex but in other factors too). I hope that he stays subby though I've seen too many stories where the yandere becomes dominate for no reason, though I'd be okay if he were a soft switch. In any case, most of his yandere tendencies are mostly played for laughs from him constantly confessing to her and getting turned down, to taking picture of her and in the end going crazy with the stalking by making cookies of her amongst other things. But he is very cute and youthful, which I think is a good match for Izumi.

Overall, a good start to a josei story (at least for me). There isn't a whole lot of drama currently going on (except I guess that brief moment with Eiji and probably some more interpersonal drama), but I think it's still a very sweet story. If you like more subby yanderes, then please check this one out.

[a-d-nox]

I was wondering if you could do a simplified way to read a chart. like use an example chart and show where you start with and so on

how to read a chart: the planets' signs and houses

the most simple way to read a chart is to break things down by sign, planet, and house. its better to start with the basics then step it up to evaluating the aspects in a chart, degrees, house rulers, asteroids, etc. there is plenty more to look at but this is a starting point - if there is interest, i will continue the discussion in a series. i am going to do something that i have never done before and dissect my own chart in front of everyone who is reading this in the most non-biased way in which i am capable.

the ascendant

pisces: as we know, a pisces rising is a skilled chameleon. they are so skilled that they can vanish into their surroundings. it is uncommon for a pisces to stand out even though they can be thought of as beautiful. most people take them for granted - people don't often give them the recognition they deserve. and because they don't, a pisces rising will undervalue themselves. not that they really want tons of recognition and power - that can be too much for an aloof and dreamy pisces person. a pisces rising is likely to create a persona to present to others - they can very quickly lose their true self to it too...

sun

scorpio: its like a dramatic love story - sex appeal meets jealously and obsessiveness. scorpio suns are known for their depth, obsessive, and analytical thoughts. they, like sheldon cooper, "don't need sleep" they "need answers". they will take things to the extreme if they don't find the answers they seek. they seek insight and intimacy - they want everything they can get out of life. scorpios are natural chasers - persistent ones at that. they are a bit childish though because they want everything to themselves including their knowledge - they might even weaponize what they know to be cruel to those they feel wronged them.

8h: 8h sun people are deep people - they don't do fluffy stuff. they like things succinct and purposeful. often they are identified as know intuitives - i mean they have the ability, they just need to tap into it and use/control it. they often hunger for self-knowledge (stuff like shadow-work, psychology, astrology, philosophy, etc is attractive to them). introspection is an art form for them. they enjoy analyzing and obsessing over things like that. either a 8h sun is driven by sex OR money, growth, and power OR maybe all of the above.

moon

scorpio: they have a very deep well of emotional energy - they feel nothing halfway. they are easily provoked and can go 0 to 100 very quickly (they are prone to boiling over / experiencing sudden outbursts). every emotion is very pure/vivid. they can be harsh and even cruel in emotional situations... emotionally, they are possessive and tend assume that others around them don't have it as bad as they do. everything can be a comparison for them - if someone is upset over something, they will comment with something "worse" that they previously experienced. they are quick to respond/react - they aren't the type to think before responding when they are upset. though they are sensitive, they have great inner strength and have the power to overcome any difficult emotional situations.

8h: emotionality is like a sixth sense - these people are intuitively gifted; they can sense not only their own feelings but everyone else's around them too. they are often obsessive when they feel intensely like this, especially when they are romantic. trust to them is the most important part of any connection. they are naturally jealous and suspicious of others so when they can't trust someone to be honest with them, they won't be vulnerable at all - they become cold and stoic. their trust issues are next level and often need professional help to work through. security is important to them in all senses so monetary savings are of their interest too.

mercury

scorpio: these people are intuitive and are known for their intensity. they have the gift of being logical/rational and determined all at once - they make great sleuths and detectives. generally, they struggle to leave any stones unturned. they hunger for truth and honesty, thus they enjoy research and the search for such. there is a tendency to become obsessive with the hunt for truth and honesty. they are often more introverted and apathetic than those around them. they struggle to open up just as they struggle to find honesty/trustworthiness in those around them. they are intellectual individuals who are easily fascinated.

8h: pessimism and/or deep thoughts are real with this placement. they have a dark mind that might be best suited for philosophy (especially existentialism) and/or occultism. they are predisposed to being overwhelmed by their emotions and being overly sensitive. often they are overcome by fantastical thoughts due to their over active mind. they seek spiritual growth via research and exploring life's many mysteries.

venus

sagittarius: these people are warm, enthusiastic, and lively. they require their independence - feeling tied too one person can be suffocating to them, especially, if that one person only fills their sexual or intellectual needs. they require both to feel comfortable staying in a connection. even then they are likely to experience more than one great romance in their lifetime. their relationships are best built on friendship first.

9h: there is a great hunger for travel and experience when it comes to this person. they are extremely likely to fall in love with a foreign land or a foreigner. it is considered rare for them to never travel and to in the stay in the same place they were born life long. they are notably wise and philosophical people who have an idealistic view and opinion of the world around them. university is likely to be an enjoyable experience for them where they gain more than just bookish experience that impacts them life long.

mars

virgo: these are willing and hard workers. they have a lot of nervous energy and tend to want to keep their hands busy - they don't do well when there is nothing to do. it makes them edgy and tense. they require a steady routine and timetables. without such things they might lose motivation to get anything done and they likely feel pain bodily (they have a stomach ache, head ache, skin issues, etc). but when they have something to do they are patient and detailed with their work. if they lack self-confidence, their work could fail to come to fruition. too much attention to detail may lead to analysis paralysis.

7h: these people are passionate and are willing to work through anything in a connection. they do have the tendency to push their partners too much to the point where they push them away. their relationships are always with a sense of purpose and direction - they are unlikely to date without intentions of a long term connection. these partnerships are great for those that professionally work together as well - they tend to have a shared objective in that monetary matter.

jupiter

gemini: these people are knowledge starved. enough is never enough for them - they are intellectually restless. they could seem very scattered because they seek knowledge of all things. they need to be more consistent with their efforts if they wish to gain anything at all. these individuals are broad/open minded and tend to be very clever. they have a quick mind that critically thinks in the craftiest ways possible.

3h: these people feel a great need to exercise their mind, and they seek intellectual challenges. often they wish to share their opinions and they tend to impose them on to others (they frequently think their opinion is fact). they have excellent communication skills and a great sense of what is just and what is not. they are people of their word and that word is reliable. they love school and to learn - even when school ends for them, they will continue to seek education. they are restless people who need both mental and physical mobility.

saturn

taurus: these people are patient, careful, and cautious. they will persist despite suffering until they have or accomplish whatever it is they want. while they are typically kind they can however become mean and overly frugal. they are ambitious and often seek financial stability which can support their their lifestyle. they frequently will ask if they truly need something however. they are overly rigid and routine oriented. they grow to appreciate what is functional over what is beautiful.

3h: it is possible that this person hated school or didn't think they were good at it at some point. often, they triumph as time goes on however. they develop skills (and fill gaps in their education) to overcome obstacles they have in the educational sector and might even become first in their class or prominent in some other way. these people are sensible and practical - they tend to be cautious and conservative when it comes to their long-term plans.

uranus

aquarius: this generation is notably kind, friendly, and inclusive. they want everyone to feel comfortable and as though they belong and are supported. often everyone in the generation has a bit of a humanitarian streak. they wish to keep their independence in most every way. they can be a bit unpredictable, inventive, and original. they typically associate money as a means of charity to ease suffering in a practical way.

12h: these people feel the need to be charitable and make sacrifices for others. strangely, they have the tendency of doing so in a logical and unemotional/cool/detached way. they do so because of some subconscious belief/motivation. often, they will trying to understand what they do and why they do it using astrology, when they truly should leave it to the psychological professionals.

neptune

aquarius: i feel like this is why we are the way we are online as a generation. we can be hyper emotional one moment then cold and detached the next. we like to stand out yet we are followers of trends and prefer to blend in. we are sensitive and intuitive, yet uncomfortable with dependence and prefer a touch of logic.

11h: these people tend to have a lively social life that keeps them busy, however, they might not have the best circle of friends. their friends might take them in, only to use them. their caring nature is often used. they enjoy helping others. they aren't fans of having lots of responsibilities. they might be very worried or concerned when having such - heavy expectations cause them too much stress.

pluto

sagittarius: this group of people is in a mental tug-of-war. they are open but secretive. they seek independence yet are possessive. they are fun loving yet prefer intimacy and intensity. often, this combo appears to me like a purge moment - get all the terrible energy out every once and awhile and be civil the next period of time. we are the people of the revolution; we see it in how we stand up to political powers and fight for our rights. we do what we do because we are wise and know that all people deserve freedom and autonomy.

9h: this is a compulsive studier who loves a mental challenge. it doesn't matter how advanced the topic is, they desire it. often to the point of mental strain. they desire intellectual perfection - this is their downfall as they force themselves to the extreme and only become unhappy with their progress and frustrated with themselves. they frequently give up and walk away in a dramatic fashion to their detriment. apart from that, i recommend that they visit a country apart from their own as they are likely to gain significant experience and knowledge in a foreign place apart from the one they already know.

the midheaven

sagittarius: to an outsider they appear excited and enthusiastic to just exist in a space. people might see them as risk takers. they are boisterous to those that watch them - they are charming, flirty, and quite funny. but they need to be careful their charm and flirtiness can attract the wrong people or cause them to assume the wrong instincts. not everyone finds the jokes that are made funny - some find them insulting. they can also seem flighty and like they do too much at once. it is important that they read the fine print of any public or high up position that they take.

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[raayllum]

Been thinking about this in the context of the similarities between this scene and conflict in 2x06 vs the conflict of likewise leaving a wounded dragon in 2x07, and in regards to potential mirroring with the main trio, but specifically looping in Amaya, Sarai, and Harrow's responses with Viren being like a narrative vessel for the 'Logical' side of things, so just put a pin there.

Now, while I think there are some aspects of this scene in regards to 2x07 that can be read in parallel — Harrow and Rayla both refusing to leave the wounded, Rayla being mirrored with Sarai leaving to save Viren and said dragon, Callum and Sarai going to save Viren and Rayla, Callum and Sarai collapsing/being injured because of it (varying degree of metaphorical death for Callum as well because of dark magic) — I want to draw a different sort of parallel line here.

This scene, I think, is the strongest piece of characterization we have for Harrow, as it lines up with just about every other decision he makes. He is a servant king, he doesn't set himself above others (Viren being the sole, angered exception), and he is unbendable to this principle. What's most noteworthy about his 'stubbornness' here, however, is that every other person he'd reasonably seek counsel from agrees with each other, and Harrow still doesn't bend.

We don't get the sense from 2x05 that Viren and Sarai agree on much, but here, even Amaya and Viren are in agreement. With that in mind, I'd argue that for the modern day trio:

Rayla is lining up the most here with Amaya (as even though she wants to save the dragon in 2x07, she is more than content to risk only herself do so alone, and 3x01 / 5x04 reaffirms this independent streak, even if it grew worse after Sarai died)

Ezran lines up with Sarai ("We have to get back to Zym" and similar sentiments of togetherness, like his brother, but still a bit more measured. We see this even with when he's encouraging Callum and Rayla to return Zym without him while he goes back to Katolis to be king; sometimes splitting up the group is for the necessary good of the mission)

And Callum lines up with Harrow. Like Harrow, once Callum gets stuck on something, he will not bend or waver, even when everyone else around him is telling him, too.

This is often times a good thing, as his determination helps him be there for people who are less keen to open up ("He persisted, as he always did" with Rayla) and serves as the backbone to his success as a mage, as without his persistence he never would've become a primal mage.

However, like most positive character traits - for Harrow or for Callum - it also sometimes be more negative / circumstantial. We see this unyielding nature get Harrow into trouble in more than a couple of instances, and we also see it happen to Callum, perhaps most notably in 5x04 as he refuses to leave the library even though Amaya, again, and Rayla are both telling him that they have to. And like Harrow, this is coming from a good place: Harrow wanted to help protect the wounded, and Callum wants to help Rayla free her parents.

The biggest difference is, I think, also where Viren is more of an asshole, in that he asserts "You wouldn't do this if it wasn't your wife's sister". This speaks, of course, both to how Viren views the world as well as aspects of his dynamic with Harrow: he wants to be special and important to Harrow, to be above other people to him, but if Harrow would do the same thing for any of them, that noted specialness doesn't well, feel special.

And while I think Callum would be working to free the elves Viren trapped regardless of who they were, because it's the right thing to do, I think the fact that they are Rayla's family is what makes him a little crazy about it, too.

[adamsrcnan]

a companion piece, to this post.

Jeremy knox spent his whole life falling in and out of love. He knew, rationally, it wasn't really love. It couldn't be, if it was so fleeting. But he fell nonetheless.

In and out.

So, Jeremy had supposed it would always be this way. People had made his heart race and his stomach flutter. Had altered his brain chemistry and also left him in despair. Sometimes they had left first, and sometimes he had. None of them had really mattered much though in the grand scheme of Jeremy's life.

He worried often if it was a flaw in his system that made his emotions so overpowering. That made his want so desperate. Some kind of identity crisis that made him latch on to a person every time, even though he knew deep down it wasn't quite enough. His sisters called him a romantic. His friends called him hopeless.

But Jeremy Knox just wanted to be loved. He wanted a healthy outlet for all he was willing to give another person. He wanted someone who shook his world up but also made everything still.

Practice was in full swing around him, and though Jeremy was locked in (he rarely ever wasn't) he couldn't stop the persistent thoughts about love echoing through his head.

He jogged across the court, waving over his backliners to follow him as they convened with their goalies to go over plays as they prepared for their next scrimmage.

One person's absence was quickly noticeably felt. Like a phantom limb. Jeremy scanned the court as he came to a stop three quarters down.

His eyes found him instantly, as they would in any room.

Jean Moreau.

He sat on the far end across the space from Jeremy and his little gathering. His eyes were closed his head leaning back against the plexi glass walls. His racquet was clutched in his hands and even from here Jeremy could tell he was grounding himself in the present moment. Catching his breath.

Jeremy allowed him.

Though it took everything in him to keep his feet planted where they were.

He spoke quickly to his team directing them on positions and plays. A few ideas he and Jean had cooked up during their late night practice sessions. His team nodded their heads in understanding and broke away to take up their positions on the court.

Jeremy stayed where he was and watched Jean. He remembered then, just last night, how Jean had checked him and Jeremy without thinking had latched onto Jean's jersey to prevent a fall. Jean had acted quickly, wrapping his arms around Jeremy, dropping his racquet to the floor in efforts to save Jeremy from the fall.

They had stared at each other for a beat too long before Jeremy spoke. Cheeks flooded with heat.

"Kinda defeats the purpose of a check, no?"

Jean huffed out a laugh. Jeremy couldn't see the way his lips twitched under his helmet, but he knew the way they would have. He had memorised the lines and, albeit very limited, expressions Jean had worn on his face.

No, Jeremy had never really fallen in love before. He had felt bursts of it, here and there, with girls and boys alike. But nothing really compared to the feeling he got as his body moved towards Jean now.

As if pulled by some invisible string. One that had always been there, from the very first day this beautiful but hurt boy had stepped out of the airport. It had lay loose and unmoving, only now Jeremy was certain it was being tugged at from the other end. And he was not going to fight it.

He came to a stop in front of Jean, and kneeled down on one knee. His forearm coming to rest up on the other.

"Jean," he said. Anticipating the ocean grey that would pull him under.

His eyes opened. Jeremy sank.

He smiled instinctively, without thought.

"Ready to jump back in?"

Jean moved forward then, pressing into his space. Jeremy let him.

His lip twitched.

Suddenly, he closed the gap. Pressing his forehead into Jeremy's. Jeremy smiled wider then and pressed back, their sweat making their skin stick. The intimacy of it filled Jeremy up with warmth from his fingers to his toes. He could spend his whole life bathing in the light of Jean's soft glow.

"Oui," he said.

His french slipping from between his lips, a whispered confirmation. Sure, he was just answering Jeremy's question. But the intensity in Jean's gaze felt like it meant more.

Jean stood then and his hand wrapped around Jeremy's, engulfing it completely, as he effortlessly hauled him up off the floor. All bone and sinew. His hands were calloused and rough and Jeremy had spent one too many nights dreaming of them.

Jean smiled down at him, sweet and lasting, before he strode off to his position on the court.

Jeremy dropped his gaze down and felt the size of his grin pull at his cheeks, as warmth blossomed under his skin. He looked up again and locked eyes with Laila across the court. Her eyebrows lifted a smirk on her face and Jeremy's grin never faltered.

Jermey knew, then, there would be no more falling in and out of love. Just falling. Knowing that he'd be caught this time.

[consistentlyamess]

Wild Sweetness ⎮ Chapter 1 - Actin' like a sweet car crash

[2.9K]

pairing(s): luca x fem!oc MJ

summary: MJ has just settled in after opening back up a bakery in Chicago when some unexpected news

warnings: not much so far, takes place during and after season 3, 18+ , MDNI, swearing, eventual smut, second chance romance, pining, slowburn, flashbacks in italics, lmk if i missed anything!!

A/N: heeelloo!! this idea has been sloshing around in my head since i watched season 2 and started working on it while waiting for season 3. comments, likes, reblogs are appriciated as always or just come chat at me! And as always 💜💜💜 TY for reading!!!!💜💜💜

Fic Masterlist I Previous Chapter I Next Chapter

London, 5 years earlier 

Everyone warned her about the harsh English autumn dawns. It would be cold and dark and dewy. And it was. But it was also cosy and quiet and nice. She liked that every now and then a grumpy early bird smiled back at her after she handed them their order, she liked that she had a steady trickle of people for a about an hour before the morning rush flooded in and she liked the thought of being done by 3 pm and still getting to go for a walk or sit in the library and study for her classes. But not all of it was fun. Not all the time anyway. There was always one asshole. And sometimes she could deal with them just fine. With a cold but persistent smile on her face. But sometimes they just struck a nerve. 

‘Hi! Welcome to Crumbly Delights, how can I hel- oh, Marcie, hi!’ 

‘Hello, sweetheart, how are you doing?’ 

‘Oh, I’m good, how are you? Long night?’ 

‘You know it. We’re re-organizing the whole kids book section and it just feels like a never-ending task.’ 

‘Woof, I can only imagine. What can I get ya’ darling? And knock yourself out, it’s on me.’ 

‘Oh, now I can’t possibly accept that!’ 

‘Yes, you can and you will! Come on, don’t break the heart of a generous American. And besides, how many times have you let me stay after closing? Or waived late fees?’ 

‘Alright, alright, just this once. I’ll have a raspberry-vanilla danish and a cappuccino to go then.’ 

‘Atta girl, coming right up!’ she said with a warm smile. She didn’t miss the man who walked in with a serious look on his face. Even though he had this boyish streak to him, his eyebrows somehow made him look like he was perpetually stern and concerned about something. She didn’t pay him any mind until she heard him mutter under his breath. 

‘It is waaaay too early to be this chipper in the morning.’ 

She dealt with assholes every single day. She knew how to take care of them, she knew how not to take it personally. But in front of Marcie was another thing. The nicest, wisest British lady, who saved her on so many lonely nights. Not with her. 

‘Well, fuck you too! You wanna try again?’ she replied with a cutting tone. 

They all froze for a moment. Her, fixing this douche with a glare, Marcie, with rounded eyes and a hand raised in front her mouth in surprise, and the douche with a slight embarrassed blush and mouth moving like a fish’s, stranded on shore. She raised an eyebrow that said, ‘try me you dick’. 

‘Uh, uhm’ he started stammering. ‘Shit, sorry, fuck I-uh, I’m sorry! I’m- i’m a chef and I have early mornings and I never, ever wanted to greet anybody like this, at 5 in the morning. I was taken aback a bit, I think, I’m sorry.’ 

‘I’m not a chef, I just work here and I’m paid to be cheerful and nice with dickheads like you all day. So, if you want to buy something, the least you can do is keep your mouth shut if you din’t have anything nice to say.’

‘We- You’re right. I’m sorry. Everything you just said was right. I’ve had a rough week, which is not an excuse, just an explanation. I’m not usually like this.’ 

‘Apology accepted. So, what can I get you today?’ 

‘I’ll just have a coffee and a croissant. Please.

‘Great, coming right up!’ she said, still with a smile on her face. She shot a ‘this fucking guy’ glance at Marcie and got to work on the on orders.

‘Have great day darling, I hope I’ll see you soon at the library.’ Marcie said as she left. 

‘Oh, don’t you worry, you will! Have a great day Marcie!’ The coffee she was making for the douche (she decided, she’ll just call him that) was ready but she thought she’ll take her time with it. 

‘Alright, here’s the croissant and the coffee, it’ll be 5,50 please.’ 

‘Right’ the douche said. He started searching for change in his pocket and she was somewhat ashamed to admit that the flustered haze pleased her a little bit. He eventually put a 10 pound bill on the counter. ‘Here.’ She started looking for change before he said: 

‘No, no-no, I don’t want the change, sorry. I was a dick and this is the least I can do.’ 

‘Well, thank you.’ She started to feel a little bad now. ‘I’m sorry that I snapped at you. It is early and even though you were being a dick, I shouldn’t have.’ 

‘Given the circumstances I think you were remarkably merciful. So, again, sorry, uhm Ma-’ he was looking at her nametag. 

‘Oh, Marjolaine. It’s French. But no one really calls me that.’ 

‘Really? It’s a beautiful name.’ 

‘You already gave me a tip, you don’t have to keep buttering me up. You’re forgiven.’ 

He chuckled at that. 

‘I actually think it’s a beautiful name. And I’m honestly surprised you didn’t spit in my coffee. The servers I worked with definitely would’ve done that.’ 

‘Well, you would’ve seen me do that. Sue us for healthcode violations or just never come back here. Can’t really risk losing business here.’ 

‘Oh, I definitely would’ve come back. Even with the spit, my conscious will only be clear, if i can leave you a tip like three more times’ 

It was now her turn to chuckle a little bit. 

‘Are all chefs such smooth talkers?’ 

‘Most of them are- how should I put this? They do tend to find some enjoyment in uhm, smooth talking and conquests.’ 

She blew raspberries as she laughed in surprise.

‘Conquests? Where are you from? The 1800s? You guys fuck the servers. Everybody knows this since the Kitchen Confidentials, there’s no need to be coy about it.’ 

‘You Americans and your straightforwardness.’ 

‘You guys and your weird prudishness.’ 

‘Well, this is where the Victorian values started. Also, not all chefs shag anything that moves. Pastry chefs generally tend to be a little more tender.’ 

‘Ah, pastry chef, huh?’ 

‘Yup, a late one at that. I better get going.’ He started leaving and she found herself wanting to say something that would make him stay. Almost as if hearing her thoughts, he turned back before stepping out. 

‘I’m Luca by the way. If you’re ever in the neighbourhood, come check out the Mimosa, my treat. Have a nice day.’ 

‘Thanks, you too.’

Chicago, Present day

The first time MJ moved into the small apartment above the bakery she immediately fell in love with the kitchen. It was probably the biggest space in there, wide counters, big fridge, small pantry that definitely made up for the lack of a bathtub. But the absolute knockout had to be the fact that it had not one but two windows. On two different sides making sure that sunshine and light could always get in. A far cry from the gloomy little London apartment she used to have. A far cry even from her first Chicago apartment from like two years ago. Coming back to the States was difficult enough, feeling like she had to start everything over at almost thirty. But there was something about the kitchen and the curtains with the small flower print that immediately had her heart. After moving in, the first thing she did was bake a peach pie. After the frenzy of moving, the uncertainties of starting a new job - the only thing she could think of at that moment, finally stopping after a gruelling month, was baking something. Nothing was unpacked, boxes filled nearly every surface area. Except for the kitchen. Getting ready to bake back then involved setting up her workspace for the first time, which finally filled her with some excitement. Feeling the space, deciding where the pots and pans should go, which drawer should store the cutlery, the cutting boards, the napkins and the clean towels - almost a form of meditation. Peach pie was always the first thing she baked in every new oven she came across. The baking of the crust gave her a general idea about times and temperatures, hot and cold spots in the oven, if it came out burnt or underdone was maybe even better if it turned out perfectly. Gave her more information. The peach had to get a little colour but not too much for it not to get mushy, the sugar or honey glaze on top browning a little but too much. 

She’s made a lot of peach pies since then but none of them felt like this. It was frenetic, hurried, it felt more like something she had to do, not so much something she wanted to do. She was always messy but this went over anything she’s ever done before. Flour everywhere, some eggshell made it into the better, trying to roast the peaches a little turned into burning them quite badly. She huffed and puffed and just couldn’t get her mind to shut off. Her hands weren’t cooperating because she wasn’t really paying that much attention and she knew it. She knew it and hated it. The tense muscles, the tightly shut jaw, her breath in her throat that just would not go deeper, the shakiness of her exhales, the headaches she gets when she can’t relax her face for too long. Everything went on autopilot but that also seemed to be glitching.

Even hours later, running errands, stepping into the bakery to help out, nothing worked. It was stupid. Down right idiotic, really, if she wants to be honest. Which she doesn’t, hence her current predicament. Pacing up and down in the kitchen, waiting for Sophie to finish her shift. Curses being murmured, no use for that of course, but still. She’s hoping that maybe if they keep coming out in these strings, maybe she’ll exorcize something, that maybe the tightness of her chest and the grip of her stomach will eventually go away. Maybe a miracle will strike and she’ll get out of this.  A long shot for sure but which one of us hasn’t hoped for one in times like these? 

‘You okay, boss?’ Sophie asks, finally wandering back to the kitchen. She noticed it earlier for sure but not wanting to hit a nerve, she ignored it. Also hoping that whatever was going on would sort itself out, that she would sort it out, which she somehow always managed to do. Apparently not this time. MJ contemplates for a minute, with a long sigh, with arms wrapping around herself. Cuticles and nails long gone due the anxious gnawing and tearing she’s been keeping at for the last two weeks. 

‘Hm? Oh, yeah, sorry, I’m- you know just-’ 

‘Okay’ Sophie interjected, putting the plates in her hand down. ‘Look, I wasn’t gonna say anything ‘cause maybe it’s none of my business but what the fuck is going on?’ 

She should’ve seen this coming for sure. Sophie always figured it out. She’s been with her since they started the renovations, through the opening, through money troubles, through broken fridges and missed deliveries. If she was being honest, Sophie was as close to best friend as she managed to have in her adult life. She absolutely should’ve known that there was no way of hiding this from her. 

‘Jesus Margo, you’re starting to scare me.’ 

‘I- fuck me! It’s not a scary thing, I promise, it’s just’ Everything comes out in huffs, in between heavy breaths and she kind of hates it. ‘Okay’ steadying breath, palms pressing into the cold metal of the counter while Sophie stays there, waiting. 

‘Do you remember that guy I told you about? The one I met in London?’

‘Sexy pastry chef guy. Of course I remember, still haven’t shown me a picture.’ 

‘Well, you’re in luck. You can see for yourself in, like, 2 days.’

‘What?!’ Sophie’s voice rises, along with her eyebrows, eyes growing big and she simply cannot blame her. ‘But, wait- that’s-’ The wheels are turning and she’s patient. She‘d much rather Sophie put it together for herself than her having to spell it out anyways. ‘No. Are you kidding me?! Sexy pastry chef guy is Luca?’ 

‘Yeah.’ 

‘Luca, from Copenhagen.’ 

‘Yup.’ 

‘Marcus’s mentor, who, I’m still not sure he’s not in love with, Luca?’

‘Yeah, Sophe, that’s all him.’ 

‘But- What?! How’s that even possible? Why the hell didn’t you say anything?’

‘I just- I don’t know, okay? When Marcus first mentioned him when I was too shocked and I couldn’t say anything and then I kept not saying anything while we became friends, thought it would be really weird, and then suddenly almost a year passed and I thought, well, now it would be really fucking weird to say anything and I just kept on not saying anything and then Marcus said he was visiting and- I don’t know, it all just got away from me a little.’ 

‘No shit.’ Sophie can’t even be mad. The fear and the sadness that settled into her MJ’s eyes is more than enough for her to know that this is not the time for scoldings you could’ve told mes and the like. ‘Again, how’s that even possible?’ she asks, still wanting to understand at the very least. 

‘It’s not that complicated, really. I was in London for two years during college, with a scholarship. We met there, my scholarship ran out, he got Noma, I moved back here, he went to Copenhagen and we broke up not too long after that.’ Still vague, still no details, still hesitant and a little closed off. Sophie nods. Not the time for prodding either. 

‘Do you want to close up, get really drunk and continue this after?’ 

‘Absolutely, I do.’ 

‘Good.’ 

***

After going through the motions, closing up shop, it’s still just 7PM. Perks of running a bakery. 

‘Is it okay to ask how you see this playing out?’ Sophie finally chimes over her third glass of Pinot. 

‘No fucking clue.’ They both laugh because this is ridiculous. Absolutely hysterical.

‘Maybe he doesn’t even remember me, you know? It’s been a while.’ 

‘Yeah, fat fucking chance of that happening.’ 

‘Yeaaaah, I’ll just have to suck this one up, I think.’ 

‘You still could just talk to Marcus, you know? Tell him not to bring him to the bakery or work something out, change shifts, bring him when you’re not there. Or you can still just get the fuck away. Make an excuse about someone’s cat dying or whatever.’

‘Sure, not suspicious at all. Also Marcus is so excited. And it’s already eating me up that I didn’t tell him earlier.’

‘How has he not figured it out though? Luca, I mean, not Marcus. Your name is a pretty huge giveaway. It’s not like there are a shit ton of Marjolaines running around Chicago.’

‘Well, Luca never knew that I ended up in Chicago. When I moved back, I went back to San Francisco. It wasn't until a couple of months that Dylan called me about the bakery. And as for the name, Marcus was the one who started calling me MJ. My best guess is he calls me that with him too and he ever felt the need to explain how that happened.’

‘Right.’ They fell silent for a while. MJ loved these nights. Hanging around for a couple more hours, for a couple more drinks. The bakery was closed, but the smells still lingered. The sweetness of vanilla, the fattiness of butter, the slight bitterness of cooked or baked fruit, lights out, most of it leaking out from the kitchen and seeping in from the streets. Lower, softer, warmer twinkles that would only stop the hardest of stone-cold hearts from opening up a little. Even now, when the jig was up and she had to actually face what was coming her way, which did kind of feel like watching a car crash in slow motion.

‘Is it okay if I ask questions about him?’ Sophie asked eventually.

MJ just nodded, eyes a little hazy. Of course she can. When, if not know? Memories being stirred up and tongue loosening from the wine. She still appreciates it. The checking in, the earnestness and caution of this younger generation.

‘How long were you guys actually together?’

‘About two and a half years.’ 

‘Did you love him?’ 

‘Shit, Sophe, big fucking questions tonight.’ 

‘Sorry, I’m sorry, it’s just- you never talk about him. And until now I thought it was because it was just kind of a fling or something. Hot pastry chef, college years, you know, the works. But seeing you now, I’m starting to think it might have been the opposite.’ 

‘Meaning?’ 

‘You know what I mean, bitch.’ Sophie pushed her shoulder a little and a laugh spilled out of her despite the ache in her chest that not even the wine could dull down.

‘It’s been such a long time. But yeah, yeah, I loved him.’ 

Sophie just hummed. 

‘Why did you guys break up?’ 

MJ just groaned as if she pulled a muscle she didn’t really use. 

‘Can I plead the fifth on that one? Just for tonight. It’s a long and sad story and-’

‘Hey, of course, you don’t have to explain.’ 

‘Okay, look!’ she slammed her glass down, turning towards her, wine splashing up on either side. ‘We can do this, alright? ‘ I’m sure Marcus will understand, and as for that douchebag-’

‘He’s not a douchebag.’ 

‘Well, he fumbled you, so he will have to try and prove that to me. So. As for that douchebag, you can handle it, and I’ll be here with you, the whole time. How long is he staying?’ 

‘I don’t know, I didn’t have follow-up questions.’ 

‘Nevermind, it doesn’t even matter, we’ll get through this, okay?’ 

MJ nodded. Sophie’s confidence was moving but she wasn’t nearly as sure of that as she was.

[riddlerosehearts]

i found ur blog recently after becoming incredibly infatuated with twst but specifically idia shroud (my friends said i act like him to an uncanny level and they were absolutely right...) and i love your vilidia posts dearly. ok that's it thank u

OMG that's so awesome, welcome to the twst fandom and congrats on having such fantastic taste in characters and ships lol!! i adore vilidia (obviously, if my whole vilidia tag is any indication) but i haven't posted about them in so long, i hope you don't mind if i use your ask as an excuse to share some silly little headcanons that i don't believe i've posted before:

so i think that when vil was like, 10 or so, his dad tried to encourage his love of potion-making by getting him one of those candy chemistry kits. the ones that come in super cute colorful boxes and teach you how to make things like exploding pop rocks and glow-in-the-dark gummies while explaining the science behind it. (here's a picture of basically the exact thing i'm thinking of.) but vil, poor sweet little vil who'd already let the brutality of the entertainment industry make him believe that he needed to be absolutely perfect, just rolled his eyes and said he was too old for that stuff and that all of that candy wouldn't be good for him anyway. he never once touched the kit, even though part of him probably did really want to.

and i also think that at some point, after he and idia had started dating, idia bought one of those same kits online and just barely mustered up the courage to ask vil if he'd like to join him and ortho in making some of the candy. he claimed the entire thing was ortho's idea, but vil could tell that idia really wanted them to do this together and he decided it'd be okay to indulge his boyfriend just once. as he actually made the candy he realized that although it obviously didn't teach him a single thing he didn't already know, it was still a lot of fun and he wished he hadn't rejected things like that as a kid.

also, speaking of chemistry, there's a voice line in-game where idia implies that he is not good at it. so while i think he and vil would be fascinated by each other's different fields of scientific interest and would love talking about it together i also think that one day idia just very overdramatically goes like: "omg i'm doing soooooo bad in my chemistry classes... if only some super smart and kind and very attractive person would help me out..."

and vil responds by telling idia that he most certainly does not share his younger brother's talent as an actor. but he agrees to help anyway and then they have cute study dates.

idia's habit of starting to excitedly infodump about his interests only to suddenly get embarrassed and stop persists for a while into his relationship with vil but every single time it happens, vil encourages idia to keep going. he often says things like "oh, are you done already? that's a shame, i was so looking forward to hearing more about sora's journey to save kairi". it takes a long time but eventually idia gets to a point where he's so comfortable around vil that he doesn't feel embarrassed anymore.

[tumblingclockwork]

BESTIE can you tell me more about your lovely lady Jo I like her a lot....

IM SOOOOOO FUCKING GLAD YOU ASKED so she’s like technically an SCP OC tho we’re not suuuper connected to that universe it’s more of a vessel to tell our story but she’s this middle aged lesbian who is PAST her prime. She never had a prime. This is a cringe woman. She’s like on the millennial gen x cusp and it’s like painfully obvious. She is not a cool woman. She hasn’t even really talked to a girl other than her sister since high school. She’s got no friends. She works a minimum wage job and then goes home to her little house she took from her elderly mom after her mom got moved to 24/7 care (Jo doesn’t visit her btw)

And then one day she wakes up with a ton of weird symptoms. They persist for weeks. She goes to a doctor. They have her take a pregnancy test even though she tries to explain to them she can’t Possibly be pregnant. It comes back positive. She takes several more. She is super pregnant. She panics. She assumes the worst. She cannot fathom how this could have happened. More tests are done. She gets an ultrasound done. There’s no baby. Every pregnancy test comes back positive. She experiences every symptom of pregnancy. Her body is reacting as if there is a baby. But there’s just no baby. Her womb is empty.

For a really long time she tries to find an answer. Doctors don’t take her seriously. They assume she has an extreme case of Pseudocyesis. They blame it on her parental problems. She sees therapists. Nothing helps, and she continues to appear more and more pregnant until her body stops at around the 7th month mark.

Eventually she gives up and for Four Years she exists in a body that is 7 months pregnant until eventually her case gets brought to a doctor who has ties to the SCP foundation and they immediately clock her as something anomalous. The foundation gets involved.

The SCP foundation sends in Agent Ainsley ( @ericka-the-worm ‘s character, If you were wondering) to pick her up. He’s a high level agent in the foundation. He’s well trusted to do an easy job like this. Except Ainsely has just come back from forced leave after his spouse, another agent at the foundation, was killed by an SCP. He’s freshly traumatized and his grief has made him angry. The sound of a lamp crashing on the ground when he breaks into her home sends him into a full on PTSD induced panic attack which he believes was not just a sign that he wasn’t ready to come back to work, but instead a mental attack from Jo, who he believes is a far more dangerous SCP than she’s letting on and able to manipulate his mind.

The foundation believes Ainsley and puts Jo in maximum containment. She’s left unattended for days. The isolation drives her crazy. She has been abducted from her home with no explanation and now sits in a silent white room every second of the day. She tries her best to stay sane but it’s near impossible. She deals with constant hallucinations and delusions. That’s when a scientist is assigned to her case. Doctor Zephyr Salem ( @kennydennys )

Dr Salem is driven by only one thing: knowledge. They learn very quickly that Ainsley’s report of Jo wasn’t accurate. And they are very easily attached to Jo for how interesting she is, both as an SCP, and as a human woman who has been driven out of her mind.

Jo IMMEDIATELY attaches to Salem as the only person who she’s in contact with. Finally being able to talk to another person and have a connection to the outside world, she relies on them, and believes them completely when they say they want to help her with her condition and eventually free her from containment.

Jo feels that she’s already been saved by Salem, because she finally has someone to talk to after being in isolation for so long. But the SCP foundation is Salem’s place of work, and Salem has to clock out eventually. They can’t stay with her all the time, and she still spends most of her time completely alone. She continues to get worse. Salem tells Jo that things won’t be like this forever, and she’ll get to leave some day. But in reality Salem has no real intention of ever letting their most interesting case yet leave them.

[supernovaa-remnant]

so I decided to write a """little""" snippet of my dreambur-centric university au but it ended up being 1.6k words, so it's going under the cut lol

uhh cw for panic attacks and mentioned pet death

Dream’s hand reaches blindly for his bedside table, searching through his haze of panic for his phone. His chest feels tight, and he feels like he can’t really get enough air in his lungs, and his stomach feels uneasy, and he feels vaguely like he’s going to be sick or pass out or maybe both. He feels like he’s a kid again, accidentally stumbling into a blackberry bush with the summer sun bearing witness, anxiety curling around him like the brambles of the bush, piercing and unrelenting. It’s an all too familiar feeling, and, though he knows the cause of it this time, it does nothing to alleviate it. 

He’s going back to university in a few days. And, it feels stupid to be worried about it because his first semester had, quite honestly, been amazing. There are friends he can’t wait to see and classes he’s excited to take, yet the anxiety persists all the same. Because he doesn’t want to leave. Because the thing about going to one’s hometown during a break is that it’s so easy to float in nostalgia and pretend like time is stretching infinitely and that nothing ever changed. He can fall into the same comforts he used to, and he can pretend he’s the same person he was months ago; he can pretend he’s an exception to change. 

But his childhood cat, Hope, died a year ago. And the holidays have only gotten harder the older he’s gotten. And he’s not the same kid picking blackberries with his parents in the summer. He’s outgrown his childhood home, and the ghosts haunt his every move, but he still doesn’t want to leave because he wants to pretend that nothing changed. He wants to close his eyes and open them to Hope laying on his chest and his friends waiting for him outside his house.

But Hope died a year ago. And he’s a university student and not a high schooler, but he wants to shut his eyes and pretend anyway. 

And he’s scared of going back. Because he loves his roommate, but sharing a room with another person can be so incredibly draining, and he just wants the space to exist alone. And a part of him thinks the whole “journey of self discovery” thing that’s supposed to happen at university isn’t quite worth it if it feels like his future has been torn out from under him. 

And Hope died a year ago, and the grief is hitting him in towering waves, and he really can’t deal with everything else on top of that. 

So, he’s fumbling for his phone, because even with all the dynamics amongst his childhood friends suddenly and almost abruptly shifting upon people’s departures to different universities, Bad has always helped him with his panic attacks. 

But it’s not Bad’s voice that greets him when he finally manages to call someone, and he curses himself for forgetting that Bad’s no longer the only contact saved under “B” in his phone. 

“Dream? Why the fuck are you calling me at 3 am?”

Dream doesn’t have the focus required to remind the groggy and annoyingly pretentious British voice that it’s 3 am in England, not Florida. 

“Dream?” 

The voice says again, more alert and laced with worry. 

“Sorry, I–” 

But Dream’s breath stutters, and he finds himself unable to continue his sentence, mouth filled only with the saltiness of his tears as he desperately tries to pull air into his lungs even as sobs keep interrupting his attempts. 

And, through the haze, he hears a calming sound. Slowly, oh so slowly, he finds the panic subsiding. The sound he hears isn’t counting—as he would’ve expected with Bad—but rather softly strummed notes on a guitar. 

“Sorry,” he says, ignoring how scratchy his voice is. 

“Don’t mention it,” Wilbur says, because of course Dream had to accidentally call Wilbur Soot of all people. “Why did you call me, anyway? I was under the impression that you didn’t quite like me,” Wilbur says teasingly, though a bit of genuineness shines through. 

“I don’t hate you,” Dream responds despite knowing that wasn’t what Wilbur asked at all. 

“I know,” Wilbur says, “but that doesn’t mean you like me either.” Something about his voice when he says it causes something in Dream’s chest to twist painfully, but before he has the chance to correct the Brit, Wilbur’s continuing. “Anyway, back to my question; why did you call me?” 

“I meant to call my friend Bad, but I guess I misclicked.” 

“Wait, what am I saved as in your phone? Because if my memory serves me correctly, the letters ‘B’ and ‘W’ are very far apart from each other.”

Dream mumbles a response, not really wanting Wilbur to hear the answer. Because Dream truly had meant to change the contact name after he’d actually gotten to know Wilbur a bit better, but he’d kept forgetting, and every time he did remember, he was in the middle of something else. 

“Pardon?” Wilbur asks, because of course he wouldn’t just take Dream’s muttered words as a response. 

“I have you saved as ‘British Cunt,’” Dream says louder, ignoring the way his face burns with embarrassment. 

For a moment, everything is silent. Then, Wilbur begins laughing, hearty and genuine, and something in Dream loosens. He’s not sure he’s ever heard Wilbur laugh so freely at something he said, and he finds himself with the inexplicable urge to make the other laugh again. 

“As hilarious as that is,” Wilbur says, “you wanna tell me why you were panicking?” 

Dream’s throat constricts at Wilbur’s words, the reminder of his anxiety causing it to flair up again. 

“You don’t have to tell me,” Wilbur’s quick to say upon Dream’s silence. “You can call someone else.” 

“No, it’s okay,” Dream manages to say, trying to swallow the lump in his throat. “I’m just nervous to go back to uni, I guess.” 

“Why?” There’s confusion in Wilbur’s voice when he asks, but there's a hint of curiosity, as well. 

Dream struggles to find the words. Where does he even begin? With his fear of change? With the anxiety about next semester’s courses? With the lack of a security blanket? It feels like there’s so much that he doesn’t even know how to articulate it. 

“I’m seventeen,” he settles on, whispering and choking on the words. “I’m seventeen,” he repeats, “and I graduated high school at sixteen, and I don’t think I was ready for this.” 

He hates how scared he sounds. He hates how vulnerable he’s being with Wilbur, of all people. Niki would have been a better person to have this discussion with, or even Techno. But Wilbur? Dream doesn’t know where he stands with the Brit, and he’s not sure he should be telling the other this at all. 

He hears a sharp exhale as Wilbur mutters something unintelligible. Then, Wilbur says, “maybe you weren't ready.” 

“It’s a big change,” Dream says, chuckling wetly. Change. He’d never really been good with that. 

“It is,” Wilbur agrees. “But you can’t go back. Regardless of whether or not you were ready, the change has happened, and nothing you do will make that any less true. Sure, you could drop out or take a gap year, but that won’t magically make things go back to how they were.” 

Dream makes a wounded sound, and he internally curses himself for doing such a thing when Wilbur would hear. A part of him wants to hang up. A part of him wants to hang up and cover his ears and pretend like this never happened. But, a bigger part of him, the part that admires Wilbur though he’d never admit it, is begging him to ask for advice.

“So what do I do?” He asks, voice sounding as unsure as he feels. 

“You move forward,” Wilbur responds bluntly. “But that doesn’t mean you have to be alone,” he adds more softly. “You have Techno and Niki and,” Wilbur pauses, hesitating for a moment, before continuing. “And you have me, if you want me.” 

And Dream thinks about it. He thinks about arguments and debates and biting words. He thinks about Wilbur’s pretentious attitude, and he thinks about everything about Wilbur that has gotten on his nerves during the past semester. He thinks about every conversation with subtle insults hidden under pretty words. 

And then, he thinks about everything else. He thinks about Wilbur and Niki sharing make-up tips. He thinks about Wilbur joking around with Techno and Tommy and Tubbo. He thinks about Wilbur helping Ranboo with the subjects Techno isn’t as strong in. He thinks about Wilbur feeding the local stray cats. 

He thinks about soft hands leading him out of a party and notes from a shared lecture given without ever having been asked for. He thinks about the soft strums of a guitar calming him from panic. 

“Thanks, Wil,” he says. “We should hang out more.” 

“I’m always up for hanging out with pretty boys,” Wilbur responds, grin audible in his tone. 

Dream scoffs and says, “get some sleep, idiot,” instead of responding to Wilbur’s playful flirting. 

“Yeah, you too,” Wilbur says with a yawn. “And Dream?” 

“Yeah?”

“Don’t hesitate to call if you need anything. I’ll always pick up.” 

Dream smiles. “I’ll keep that in mind. Goodnight.” 

“Goodnight. Sweet dreams.” 

“Oh my god, you’re so stupid. I’m hanging up now.” 

Wilbur’s giggles are abruptly cut off when Dream hangs up, but he can’t shake off the fond smile that has found its way to his face. And, most amazingly of all, he finds himself more excited to return to uni than dreading it. The anxiety is still there, of course, but he thinks that maybe he’ll be able to find ways to manage it, after all. 

[zodiactalks]

These Zodiac Signs will DRIVE YOU CRAZY

Have you ever noticed that when to talk to a certain someone in your life, you often end up doubting yourself, feeling as though you’re crazy, don’t have it all together, or are just plain out of your mind? Fret not, it’s not you.

Some zodiac signs have the potential to put things on someone else’s head just to save themselves from everlasting guilt or shame. This is called gaslighting, and some zodiac signs are champions of gaslighting.

This can be in the form of disapproval, persistent doubt, twisting and turning reality into their own version of ‘facts’ that can drive any sane person, insane. They often get away with this as they have the confidence and courage to look into someone’s eyes, tell their version of ‘truth’ with such beaming conviction that can make anyone doubt their own mind.

Let’s find out if you’re dealing with a zodiac sign that can or is already driving you crazy -

#1. Gemini

A zodiac sign that is incapable of confronting and resolving issues, often finds the easy route by manipulation and gaslighting.

Gemini is truly someone who changes their opinions and views a mile a minute. This is exactly why they find it really difficult to stick to their words and end up doing something completely different than what they promise.

This often gets them into trouble and in order to dodge the bullet of accepting their mistake, they end up changing the entire dynamic into what works best for them by blaming someone else.

Gemini can be very moody and their emotions change every second, making them unpredictable and difficult to be around. People in their life often find themselves walking on eggshells and see Gemini as a missile that can go off at any second.

People with Gemini in their life often feel as though they’re losing their mind and end up having to self-doubt with Gemini’s manipulative moves.

#2. Scorpio

Scorpio is one of the most controlling zodiac signs who need complete authority in their hands, so they can plan, twist, and move things according to their liking.

They feel entitled to take control over your life and their jealous and insecure side often makes them sabotage their own relationships. They appear to be dominating and possess anger issues which often scares off their beloved ones.

Scorpio is overly possessive about their self-respect and loyalty from their partner so much so that they can create a huge deal even on a groundless feeling that their partners are cheating on them. Scorpio’s controlling nature can make even the sanest of people want to pull their own hair.

#3. Leo

Leo, the lion sure does get roaring which might just drive you crazy to the extent you’d rather walk away than be near the roaring lion. Leo is incapable of apologizing for their mistake and the word ‘sorry’ can’t be found in their dictionary.

In the quest for finding the upper hand, Leo will go to any extent and can manipulate their way into guilting you into things you never saw coming.

Leo is always up in their head about things and cannot ever stick to their feelings, one minute you’re the world to them and the next you’re merely someone they knew from the past.

Their wrath is not everyone’s cup of tea and their fire energy cannot be always dealt with. They have a nagging side that can come to the surface quite often and can repel you as they might have an endless list of complaints about you or hand you a to-do list to work on yourself.

Leo’s pride, sulking nature, and wrath are something that can make their loved ones feel crazy for loving a Leo.

#4. Virgo

Talk about perfection! Perfection at the cost of sanity, though. Virgo is known for their orderly ways that make them well, Virgo. Their obsessive need to keep everything and everyone in check can be immensely controlling to the point that they often forget to let loose and have fun.

This trait of being perfect, something the Virgo believes people should look up to, often ends up being a characteristic that the people in their life find pretty annoying. Virgo being an idealist cannot take criticism and is known to hold grudges for eternity.

Virgo is also known to be a runner from conversations and confrontations. They are known to dwell in their hideaway if they ever have to have a deep conversation about their feelings.

It takes a lot to win the heart of a Virgo but very little for them to lose interest in you. This unpredictable nature can make Virgos one of the most complicated zodiacs that will drive you crazy and make you drive your car far away from them.

[grokebaby]

Okay more attention for Mewmew as well time to make a wall of text talking about em.

Can you imagine how hard it must be to remain optimistic and cringily whimsical in a world like this? Especially with the kind of life Mewmew has faced? M joined the galactic alliance initially to, ykno, play heroics when times were different, mew was younger and the world felt easier to conquer (in the non evil way ofc). Then splash, witness mass death, large scale disasters and violence. Did you know Mewmew never told the alliance m had the normal cat form? That's how m was able to move on to a different, more peaceful life. Can you imagine the scoffs, eyerolls, condescendion and covert bullying one gets when they talk in Uwuish naturally, can you imagine trying to train yourself out of it? Out of the way you feel most comfortable talking in?

Quite literally hiding the softer side of yourself from others to remain strong and retain respect from your peers.

Evilicus was of course the meanest about any mannerisms or speech style Mew let slip but that'd be expected of a nasty personality like them. But the people who are supposed to work beside you, quipping about it even after knowing that that's just how you naturally talk, for some time now? Ouch.

Imagine, Mewmew having to exist beside stern serious faces who lament about the poor state of the world, as if it's the default? As if it's how it always will be? Imagine, being told how naive and, frankly, stupid you are for believing otherwise. "Maybe you're not suited to working here" they told mew, because m had the audacity to say No, the world is a very beautiful and hopeful place, and living beings don't naturally default to selfishness. No, not even demonic entities. "I'm sure-" Mew said, "I'm sure even Evilicus' goons laugh and live a little between battles, I'm sure of it! I'm sure they don't all hate the world and wish for destruction, of course they don't! I'm sure, many of them are scared and tired!"

"Well, that's too bad", they replied to Mew. "Doesn't change the situation, and there's nothing we can really do about it".

Yeah, obviously. But are you people allergic to acknowledging it? Stop celebrating over seas of corpses just because they belong to the opposing side. "They're monsters! We're allowed to feel accomplished for saving this lot!" - at the cost of lives. Thinking, feeling lives. "It's war. Get used to it"

"Maybe I don't want to get used to it.." Mew thought. Too late to back out just yet, though. Evilicus' powers grow by the day, and it's too big of a risk to ignore. "Just this one." Mew thought, "Just take care of this one, then you can leave and finally see a happy face around. Then you can rest. The world just needs to be saved, and this threat detained." m told mewself every night. Then - Maybe then, mew can go back to being ms most genuine self. The one that talks in nyas with a straight face.

Evilicus is defeated, great work team! Time to finish them.

What? Like, kill them?

Obviously. Imagine how much suffering Evilicus caused. Obviously kill them. They deserve it.

"Regardless of if they do -" Mew argued "It doesn't fix anything now! We need to focus on rehabilitation over punishment!"

Seriously, Mewmew? That's insulting.

"Is it..?" is it so insulting to want all life - evil, wicked, nasty life too, to have it's own value? No matter what? Does the value of your life decrease the more you hurt people? Is it really equality if your value can decrease through your actions? Is that humane?

"Just this one", mew thought. "Save one life more, and then you can go home and be done with it." save Evilicus, and that'll be the last heroic deed you do, Mew told mself. And then you'll have done enough world changing, and can focus on simply making people smile.

And that persistent, hardheaded mf kitty did it. Mewmew saved one more life, arguably the most wicked of all, the one least deserving of a hero. Rest well earned.

But it's not so cut and dry, is it? Nothing really is. Evilicus now lives - on unwanted time ofc. Someone doesn't simply disappear after being defeated (no matter how much they'd want to). Evilicus shows up, and of course, time to still help this one wicked, nasty life to carry on. Patch them up, feed them, and send them off again. Then Mewmew can rest easy once more, knowing m didn't leave a helpless person (a wicked, horrible person) to suffer and potentially, slowly die.

But it's not so simple, is it? It never fucking is. Evilicus is an asshole, frankly, and wears Mewmews patience to the minimum, even outright hurting em in the process. Why do you still bother. Why are you still so fucking kind. Aren't you tired of it.

And Mewmew says "No, I'm not. I won't get tired of being kind. That's impawsible!"

But nothing is impawsible, as Mewmew used to say.

However, it pays off, doesn't it? Imagine, being nice and decent to the worst person you know, it does actually make a difference. You can actually make a difference. Imagine. Evilicus can indeed feel remorse. You can't believe it either but it's happening?

Mewmew finally sighs a small sigh of relief. Maybe now, we can rest easy. Could you imagine?

[nightmare-dreamt]

Hi, there! Can I ask for a matchup with My Hero Academia and Chainsaw Man? I'll be 18 soon, my pronouns are she/they and I don't have a gender preference. I'm 5'11", I have fair skin, round shaped face with a small double chin, chubby cheeks covered in fake freckles, potato nose, I wear a fake septum piercing (I'm allergic to real ones :/), long black hair with undercut and bangs, hazelnut brown eyes and I wear glasses. I have a sparkly personality and I'm a bit stubborn, kinda bossy, brutally honest and also a bit selfish. I have several anxiety and panic attacks due my father's and cousin's death who died due skin cancer and brain cancer. I also lost the only ones I could define 'grandmas' even we weren't blood related. I love singing (I'm taking lessons with a vocal coach) and I want to learn playing piano. I like music, makeup, scented candles, shopping, cats, graphic novels. I hate persisting people, injustices, fireworks, snakes, balloons, spinach and garlic, horror stuff.

Matchup for Junk0-enoshima!

Bnha: Izuko Midoriya

Deku loves your personality and talks about it a lot to his friends or to you. He loves how open be can be with you and how every time he's around you it makes him want to shine bright. Deku's favorite thing about you is your face, he enjoys putting his hands on your cheeks and holding your face. It makes him feel like he's holding the whole world in his hands.

On days when the two of you are alone, Deku will ask for you to sing to him and for every second he's invested, listening to every note. When you tell him that you want to learn something new, he's Immediately on board supporting any decision you make, as long as he gets to listen.

For the longest time, Deku thought you actually had freckles until he saw you without them, very confused at how you had gotten rid of them. Once you explain it to him, he wants to see you do your makeup every time, just so fascinated by the techniques and styles. Deku now has a whole notebook based on makeup and the art behind it. Don't tell anyone though ;)

Shopping trips are the best with Deku, he loves going through every store and checking out new things, always leaving with a bunch of bags in his hands. Deku is the type of boyfriend who would spend a bunch of money on his partner, but then when money is spent on him he feels bad and tries to repay you back.

Chainsaw Man: Kobeni Higashiyama

You met Kobeni when a devil was attacking the building you were working at, she saved you and you didn't know what else to do but take her out as a way to thank her. Then, one lunch turned to another and then a dinner, and then an actual date.

The two of you do each other's makeup, while watching shows and movies together, it's like a sleepover but even funnier. You two shared new candles with each other, one time Kobeni bought a candle and put it in her living room and when you visited the candle seemed to disappear. I wonder where it went?

The two of you have both lost those close to you and everyday Kobeni hopes that she can come home and see your beautiful face without having to worry about something happening. When one of your are happening, she's prepared ready for anything making sure to be there for everyone of them and comfort you through it.

When the two of your guys' relationship grows and you guys move in with each other, and as soon as you guys are settled you get a cat and name it one of those cheesy names. There's various pictures around your guy's house of the cat napping with one of your or the other. Cuddle time is a must for Kobeni and the cat of them and if one isn't there the other is on their way, finding a way into the cuddle session.

[fangaminghell]

How I imagine Blair's time gettign kidnapped went like :]

The light was blinding when Blair tried to open xyr eyes, making the pain in xyr head worse as xe slowly awoken from…..whatever the fuck happened. What did happen? When xe try to think about it, xe are only met with pain.

“Fuck,” xe hiss, squeezing xyr eyes shut at the pain. Did xe really get that soft? Xe faced things 10x worse. 

“Bun?!” Blair’s eyes fling open at the familiar cry and pushing past the pain, xyr eyes scanned for the little Buneary.

“BunBun?” Blair croaks, surprised by how raspy xyr voice has gotten. Blair soon felt a soft pair of paws touch xyr face. They look up to see BunBun, xyr Buneary, teary-eyed and panicked. That’s when everything clicked into place. 

Luna was kidnapped, and Blair was trying to save her….only to be knocked out from behind. Xe have been growing soft. If this was during xyr assassin days, xe would have handled the ambush more accordingly. As in it wouldn’t happen at all. Though a lot of people would be dead, and xe know Suraya wouldn’t be pleased with that….

Blair dismisses xyr train of thought, focusing back up to BunBun. The poor Buneary looks scared out of her mind, sniffing back tears, not moving her paws away from Blair’s face. It’s….so odd to see her like this. For all the times BunBun has been a thorn in xyr side, Blair always thought she was fearless. She willingly threw herself at opponents far greater and stronger than her and enjoyed it. Xe saw her laugh at possible death, then punch it right in the face. But now? Now she’s crying for her trainer with fear in her eyes. Blair decided then and there that xe never want BunBun to feel this way ever again.

“Hey…” they rasp, the pain getting better to manage, “ I’m okay see?” Xe try to smile, the concept still foreign to xem, but BunBun shakes her head, pointing to her own forehead. Her own forehead?

“Is there…something wrong with my forehead?” BunBun nods.

“....am I bleeding?” she nods again. Well, that explains the pain. Motherfuckers caused a concussion…..could be worse. BunBun still looks terrified, for xem no less, and Blair can’t stand the look she’s giving xem. What do trainers do to comfort xyr pokemon? What would Suraya and Leo do? Pet them?

It takes a lot of strength for Leo to even feel xyr arms and hands, but when xe do, xe find that xyr hands tied around xyr back. Great. So xyr going to have to rely on words, which is not xyr strong suit. Joy.

“ BunBun….hey look at me,” BunBun sniffs, squeaking in response, almost causing Blair to falter. But xe persisted,” We’re gonna get out of here, yeah?” The more xe talk, xe more xe feel xemself slipping.

“ We’re gonna get out of here and kick their asses and save Luna. Sounds fun, right?” Again, xe try to smile, too delirious to consider if xyr doing it right. BunBun sniffs again, wiping away her tears, but she smiles back and that’s all Blair could ask for. 

“ I’m afraid that won’t be the case,” a voice startles the both of them. BunBun turns around and Blair looks forward to see a person in ropes, looking down at them behind a jail cell. Wait…down? Are xe on the floor right now?

“ You are to be judged for crimes, Winters. They are blood on your hand,” 

In the past, that sentence wouldn’t face xem at all. Since it is true. Xe are a killer. The blood on xyr hands is unimaginable. Winter’s Reaper. A monster. That was simply the truth. But now? Now it hurts. It shouldn’t hurt.

BunBun quickly puts herself between Blair and the robes person, her tiny arms stretched out defensively. The ropes person looks down at her, unamused.

“ Your actions mean nothing. Xe will be judged. Alakazam.”

An Alakazam teleports his way next to the robes person, and in a blink of an eye, BunBun is thrown across the cell, to Blair’s horror.

“No!” xe yell, not seeing xyr partner, still in pain to properly move. Xe glare at the robes person, mustering every sheer coldness from xyr will. Alas, the robes person is unfazed. 

“ Don’t you hurt her,”

“ Don’t act like you care,” the robes person retorts,, “ We all know you could care less about the pokemon. But her out of her misery and tell her how you truly feel, killer,” 

How xe truly feel?

BunBun latched onto xem all the way back in Obsidia. Truthfully, the two never got along, not at first. Why BunBun decided to stay was a mystery to xem. Maybe it was Suraya, who gave her the nickname. Or maybe she just wanted some adventure. Regardless, BunBun has been an annoying constant for this whole journey. And honestly? Xe wouldn’t have it any other way.

“ She’s my pokemon. I’m her trainer,” xe say simply, “ And as her trainer, it’s my job to give her the utmost care and love,” Xe pause, not hearing BunBun get up from the attack. Xe know she;s alive, xe have seen her survive so much more deadly shit, but xe can’t risk it.

“Please….she’s my partner in crime. Please don’t hurt her I-...I’ll be judged. Just don’t hurt her,”

“BUN?!” BunBun cries, and relief washes over Blair, hearing xyr pokemon’s voice. 

“....very well,” the robes person hums, going to open the caged door, “ You surprise me, killer. Maybe Arceus will be kinder to you in judge-”

“Just say you’re gonna kill me instead of this ‘judgment’ crap. We all know what you mean,” If Blair could roll xyr eyes without inducing a headache, xe would. The robes person sneer at them.

“....I take that back. You are nothing but filth,”

Unlocking the cage gate, the robes person takes a step forward, and just as he does, BunBun stands between them again. If Blair knew any better, the robes person rolled his eyes.

“ You heard xem. They want to be judged.Step aside,”, Even when only seeing her back, Blair can already tell the face BunBun is giving. A look of pure hatred.

“Bun.Ea.RY!” 

Before the robes person can respond, BunBun lunges at the man, using her ears to punch him in the face. The man stumbles back, falling as he covers his nose.

“ You- filthy vermin! Alakazam!”

“NO!” Blair yells, watching again as BunBun gets flinged across the cell. But unlike last time, she gets back up again immediately, lunging for the Alakazam this time, also punching it in the face with her ears. The Alakazam stumbles back alongside its trainer, glaring at BunBun ( who’s glaring back, from what Blair can tell), once again standing between Blair and the opposers. She turns her head back towards Blair, a confident and reassuring smirk on her face. Blair feels xyr heart swell at it, never seeing a pokemon, or anyone, go so far for xem.

“ Buneary,” she says confidently, and Blair feels like xyr going to cry.

“Y-yeah,” xe chokes back the tears, “Kick their asses,” BunBun beams, turning back to the robes person and Alakazam.

And then she starts to glow. 

Suraya had told him once that Buneary’s are infamously hard to evolve, due to starting out with such low happiness with their trainer, and with friendship being the key to evolving. Bllair, back then, thought that BunBun would never evolve then. Xe hated her, she hated xem, and that cycle of annoyance will continue until BunBun decides to up and leave. And yet here they are. 

BunBun’s small figure grew in size, evolving within the light that surrounded her. And Blair was crying. Crying at the sight of xyr BunBun evolving. Crying at the mere thought that BunBun values them not as a trainer, but as a friend. How long has it been since they cried? They don’t know, and don’t really care, at the moment. The light seized, and there stood BunBun, ready for battle.

[ Congratulations! Your BunBun has evolved into a Lopunny!]