#the only thing I can stomach right now

[footnoteinhistory]

“We were just this family together, all of us. And we spent time off stage together a lot. So it was that—it was a family… We were a family, as dysfunctional as most families are, but a family.” -JBL, 2024

[orcelito]

Despite all odds, I have arrived home safely👍

Turns out that the earlier goop was the better goop. The adderall goop. The adderall has worn off now though. So I am. Very incredibly out of it.

But I am home. And I will take my quick shower. And then I will climb into bed.

I do need to eat. But... later...

[parrysystem]

i want my dad to be okay. i dont want to lose him

[boy-above]

i decided im gonna try to cut back on soda bc usually i drink two or three cans a day and that's too much, esp since i'm gaining weight and i have a very bad relationship with my weight so if i can stop that it would be beneficial for my brain health lol. i want to cut down to one can of soda a day, so i went out and got some flavored water instead also sparkling flavored water for when i want fizz. hopefully i can do it, i set it as one of my goals with my therapist so if i can do it i'll feel like such a big boy. so if you see me making posts like "i only had one can today!" i am congratulating myself.

[terminalmemes]

So excited for stew in the morning. It’s in the crocked pot and it smels so good

[bitchfitch]

For all the teething I've been doing on Pavo and Esti i haven't been able to like, actually write any thing for them recently mostly because I've been Busy.

But also because I'm snapping between like 3 ideas for them at terminal velocity and haven't been able to actually get anything written for them and it's like having pumas bouncing around my skull at mach fuck as though theyre house cats at 2 am when you're trying to sleep,

[bl00dh0rs3]

It is so fucking funny how someone telling me to do something is the fastest and easiest way to get me to want to Actively grind my life back to halt instead.

[bvckleykinard]

started using the air fryer to make a single giant pancake for myself and it's so great

[eachuisge-cc]

this is the first win I've ever gotten with this game, the dick zone of the UV is already paintable and I don't have to do anything but edit the fur texture

this is good news for the NSFW content enjoyers and GREAT news for everyone else, because it means I can make paintable tails that don't have to sample from another part of the wolf. so that's just become my next project after this.

[mintchochipkookie]

kim namjoon for world president when

[jamesbukkakebarnes]

.

[icewindandboringhorror]

Daily Log 5

Trying out (probably just temporarily) making short daily-ish notes about things, in an attempt to see if it helps me be more reflective or productive lol.

Activities: Not much, I had to run errands most of the day and also felt incredibly tired, probably because the cats woke me up like 4 times last night begging for food and things. Overly warm and headachey a lot.

I planted a few new flowers, and pressed more flowers and clovers in my Large Sturdy Flower Pressing Book as well.

Actually worked on translating the text for the previously mentioned tapestry/painting thing. I think I've decided that it doesn't really matter very much, because nobody else even knows anything about this conlang except for me, so they won't know if it's wrong lol.. It is not entirely completed after all (complete enough to translate most simple sentences into consistently, but also there are a few spots here and there where I haven't fully worked out the way some part of speech actually functions or etc., or I wrote down one thing that later contradicts something else, so occasionally I reach a sentence that I'm not sure exactly which rule to follow to translate, and I need to do a larger comprehensive organization of the document to work out all the kinks and declare officially like 'THIS is the ONE way this is done' etc. etc.) - so because of that, I think I'll just kind of 'do my best' and if the rules now end up changing in the future as I further work on the language, then, that's fine, because nobody can read it anyway lol. Kind of like that song on my side music youtube that's sung in genuine Avirrekava lyrics but also I wrote them years ago and some of the sentences have now become outdated/invalid.

Washed and cleaned some kale so it will be dry for me to maybe make silly kale chips tomorrow.

Final proofreading + posting of the poll adventure thing.

eughh,, literally nothing else.. I hate running errands because it always makes me feel drained and sick after, plus I get nothing else done all day except for just going places. I know checking my p.o. box and picking up cat food and stuff is technically still a productive action, but it just feels like.. i should be getting all of my long term projects done instead lol.. what about the videos?? or worldbuilding?? what does grocery shopping have to do with elves??!?! >:V (aside from pretending to be a group of fantasy creatures evaluating produce having an imaginary conversation with yourself at the store ghghj,, but that is not productive either lol)

Notable sights: Found 13 four leaf clovers, and 2 five leaf clovers, though one of them is almost a 6 leaf (like one of the leaves is nearly split all the way into a sort of heart shape, just not entirely). Also two of the clovers are HUGE, probably the biggest 4 leaf clovers I've ever collected, like 2 inches across maybe. The sky was very pretty a lot with big fluffy white clouds. Not a 'sight' really, but I got to sit in air conditioning for a little while today and it was very nice. I love the cold crisp kind of stale air smell, like walking into a freezer or something (which I used to do when I was a kid, I would sneak into a walk-in freezer at a school cafeteria and just sit there for a while lol), it's comforting to me.

Goals moving forward: Consistent sleep schedule. Focus on social activities, finding new friends in the places I want to move, communicating with ones I have. Physical therapy exercises. Plant nasturtiums. Finish and upload videos, edit costume pictures & etc. Do the new costumes I've planned. MAKE SCULPTURES at some point, I miss them.

Notable foods: Had a bit of smoked gouda and green onions in my Mandated Completely Plain Flavorless Grits For Breakfast this morning, as a littol treat lol.. Tried a 'biscoff' ice cream bar, which is generally a flavor profile I like, but I think I would usually rather be eating a cookie than having ice cream. Also an Ensure nutritional drink, which I know most people consider gross but I genuinely like them.. maybe it's like a source of comfort when my stomach is too sick to eat, like 'oh well at least I can have this cold smooth textured chalky chocolate thing' lol.

Sort of like how I have positive conditioning to feel safe/comfortable in bathrooms (due to it usually being one of the only places you can safely retreat from a social situation or get out of crowds in public areas, etc.), even though rationally I have no particular reason to like bathrooms much, and most people dislike public bathrooms especially. Fellow public bathroom and ensure nutritional shake lovers unite! (3 of us in the entire world)

[omarfor-orchestra]

.

[tittysuckersworld]

vent tw, if you have depression please please just dont interact-

[solasgf]

i barely ate today bc i was so anxious and coupled with only three hours of sleep i'm not doing well

[curioscurio]

This is one of my favorite examples of Ryoko Kui understanding different body type needs and functions on a completely higher level than anyone else in the field right now.

When you have more fat distribution around your center and stomach, the way your body folds on itself makes it incredibly difficult to sit against a wall with your head resting on your knees like that! In fact, for someone like me, it takes active effort and strength to hold that pose. My body can not rest in a pose like that because it is uncomfortable to my body type!

On the other hand, one of the first things I notice when i lose a lot of weight is that I can sit with my knees pulled way closer than usual to my chest without strain or pain. It's a pretty noticeable difference!

It's such a small detail, but so specific that I immediately had to get up and see for myself how I felt sitting in that position. I can do it and it's for sure possible, but it's mostly uncomfortable and has never been my go to pose after collapsing from running.

It's only one line, but it would go right over the heads of people who have only ever been thin or straight sized their whole life. Ryoko Kui nobody else is on your level doing it like you, and us plus size and fat fans see every single step you've taken to properly and respectfully represent our bodies!! Thank you!!