#the one thing that defines your existence is......

[greenknighteitm]

Edited: to @holycrapitis i'm going into this with the Idea that Trump is guilty. I am interested in this evidence you say that exists of him not doing these crimes and the evidence of democrat crimes. I will be honest to you, I will fact check it, because of the rampant propaganda everywhere, rMost(I don't think any but I could be wrong. Im being lazy and not reading to make sure) of it directed at you isn't about the charges.

It seems like it's a confusing mess of policies... It seems a felon would need a waiver, not sure how one would get one. But it seems likely a waiver wouldn't work with how many felonies he has, tho I can't say I'm terribly informed on the exact charges to say that with certainty since this was just a quick google.

I would tend to agree with this person but as far as I know people used maruijana could be felons and I don't think those people should be disqualified depending on their other qualites.

Like I think this blank kind of statement does a lot of harm to minorites, which isn't that the kind of thing leftists, even democrats, are trying to avoid?

But it's possible that Trump is legally not allowed for different reasons, I wish it said what ones.

So onto the person I reblogged from.

The majority of people who voted probably aren't Communists, like the cold war propaganda is still very much in effect. And kamala definitely isn't, especially economically, and generally I don't think politicians Democrats are communist and are probably mostly still running on the ideas of the cold war. Theres definitely some outliers who are closer but definitely no elected.

And as the past shows, communists aren't necessarily going to be socially leftist (equality for all, in everything, raise people and lower people to become equal, etc . Because a lot of people who are rich become rich of the exploitation of others. We should give the value back to those who are exploited.) And I'm sure there's people on the social left who think kamala still isnt far enough, which might be.

Hmm there's got to be some words to define socially left other then being equal...

Anyways people know Trump was legally elected, but legal doesnt mean good. As far as I know, which to be fair isn't much, in the echo chambers who want trump to be president the idea was that trump was elected but was illegally changed. But I'm not in those circles so it's possible another narrative was that he would've if Democrats didnt make the votes turn their way, in legal ways.

AFAIK which honestly isn't much again since scrolling down theories on why we lost is psychlogically damaging no matter what side it is or even what it is I think

The theories I have heard say that Republicans gerry mandered the hell out of counties to get the results we got. But idk if that's an actual theory because then leftists are just being hypocrites(which I feel can be a good reaction if you feel like your in danger) about the electoral college since in the situation where its just Gerrymander at fault Trump would have still have the popular vote. So I think a more reasonable theory would be it had an effect, but not to the point where kamala won. The biggest effect was propaganda, in all of its forms. Even from people who don't know they are. If it's content showing a specific opinion, it's propaganda to someone. To educate you need good faith back to back conversation and research between people. At least in my opinion. With that definition intent definitely matters IMO since like an ad is explicit propaganda while a lot of content is implicit propaganda.

TBH I'm not liking this narrative that people who voted for Trump understand the consequences and believe the same things Trump does. Especially if they were like me and tuned out politics when he was elected like I did with biden, which I'm ashamed about. There's too many variables for me to believe that they all hold the same beliefs as trump.

Hold some of them? Believe lies about about both? Both? All the above? Yeah, sure. But I think it's crucial to not stereotype people who think different. It allows for dehumanization I feel which won't help us to grow this nation and have its citizens mature. Not to say the country is immature, in the traditional sense, where I think thats viewed as a bad thing, more that there's more progress to be made and when we think more globally, we realize there's so much more room to grow.

Want to say thanks to @holycrapitis for catching my attention and getting some of my thoughts together. I think when something like this happens, where the candidate you wanted to win doesn't, it activates the same emotions as grief does. So I've kinda been avoiding the topic. I'm sorry to those who were on the other side and got hurt even more by those who won while you were grieving four years ago no matter how much I disagree with you and how much I think these beliefs will hurt this country and my friends and family.

Its a shame I don't see this kind of empathy more. We should always start with this kindness. But it's what tribalism does. It dehumanizes the "them" and says its for the good of all, that it is justified, etc. Its never justified. It only hurts everyone.

[grison-in-space]

you know what else fucks me up about the US election? one of the things that has left me reeling in bewilderment and grief this month?

I'm a scientist, y'all.

That means that I am, like most American research scientists, a federal contractor. (Possibly employee. It's confusing, and it fucks with my taxes being a postdoctoral researcher.) I get paid because someone, in the long run ideally me, makes a really, really detailed pitch to one of several federal grant agencies that the nation would really be missing out if I couldn't follow up on these thoughts and find concrete evidence about whether or not I'm right.

Currently, my personal salary is dependent on a whole department of scientists convincing one of the largest and most powerful granting agencies that they have a program that is really good at training scientists that can think deeply about the priorities of the agency. Those priorities are defined by the guy who runs the agency, and he gets to hire whatever qualified people he wants. That guy? The Presidential Administration picks that one. That's how federal agencies get staffed: the President's administration nominates them.

All of the heads of these agencies are personally nominated by the president and their administration. They are people of enormous power whose job is to administer million-dollar grants to the scientists competing urgently for limited funds. A million dollars often doesn't go farther than a couple of years when it's intended to pay for absolutely everything to do with a particular pitch, including salaries of your trainees, all materials, travel expenses, promoting the work among other researchers, all of it—so most smart American researchers are working fervently on grants all the time.

The next director of the NIH will be a Trump appointee, if he notices and thinks to appoint one. NSF, too; that's the group that funds your ecology and your astroscience and your experimental mathematics and physics and chemistry, the stuff that doesn't have industry funding and industry priorities. USDA. DOE, that's who does a lot of the climate change mitigation and renewable energy source research, they'll just be lucky if they can do anything again because Trump nigh gutted them last time.

Right now, I am working on the very tail end of a grant's funding and I am scurrying to make sure I stay employed. So I'm thinking very closely about federal agency priorities, okay? And I'm thinking that the funding climate for science is going to get a lot fucking leaner. I'm seeing what the American people think of scientists, and about whether my job is worth doing. It's been a lean twelve years in this gig, okay? Every time the federal government gets fucked up, that impacts my job, it means that I have to hustle even harder to get grants in that let me support myself—and, if I have any trainees, their budding careers as well!—to patch over the lean times as much as we can.

So I've been reeling this week thinking about how funding agency priorities are going to change. I work on sex differences in motivation, so let me tell you, the politics reading this one for my next pitch are going to be fun. I'm working on a submission for an explicitly DEI-oriented five year grant with a cycle ending in February, so that's going to be an exercise in hoping that the agency employees at the middle levels (the ones that know how to get things done which can't be replaced immediately with yes men) can buffer the decisions of those big bosses long enough to let that program continue to exist a little while longer.

Ah, Christ, he promised Health & Human Services (which houses the NIH) to RFK, didn't he? We'll see how that pans out.

I keep seeing people calling for more governmental shutdowns on the left now, and it makes me want to scream. The government being gridlocked means the funding that researchers like me need doesn't come, okay? When the DOE can't say fucking "climate change," when the USDA hemorrhages its workers when the agency is dragged halfway across the country, when I watch a major Texan House rep stake his career on trying to destroy the NSF, I think: this is what you people think of us. I think: how little scientists are valued as public workers. I think: how little

This is why I described voting as harm reduction. Even if two candidates are "the same" on one thing you care about, they probably aren't the same level of bad on everything. Your job is to figure out what that person would do in this job. It's not about a fucking tribalist horse race. A vote is your opinion on a job interview, you fucks. We have to work with this person.

Anyway, I'm probably going to go back to shaking quietly in despair for a little longer and then pick myself up and hit the grind again. If I'm fast, I might still get the grant in this miserable climate if I run, and I might get to actually keep on what I'm trying to do, which is bring research on sex differences, neurodivergence and energy balance as informed by non-binary gender perspectives and disability theory to neuroscience.

Fuck.

[letters-to-lgbt-kids]

My dear lgbt+ kids, 

Let’s look at some myths and facts about drag queens:

Myth: “Drag queen” is a gender identity.

Fact: Drag is a performance art. 

Let’s go into some detail here: “Drag queen” is a role you play, for example as a form of entertainment or as an expression of your creativity. A gender identity on the other hand is intrinsic and enduring, it’s about who you are in your mind and heart (For example: a trans woman doesn’t “play” a woman, she IS a woman). So, drag and gender identity are two separate things - although we also need to add a little disclaimer here that gender identity is wonderfully complex and highly individual and not always so easily defined. So while drag is usually separate from gender identity, there can be overlap! 

Myth: All drag queens are gay cis men.  

Fact: Drag is an inclusive art form. Many drag queens are gay cis men, but not all. Drag performers can have any sexual orientation and gender identity - including transgender or non-binary. See that part about “overlap” above! 

Myth: There’s only one type of drag.  

Fact: Drag is incredibly diverse and has many different styles. Drag queens may also blend different types to create their own unique persona. Some examples: Pageant drag focuses on glamour and beauty (drawing inspiration from traditional beauty pageants). Camp drag leans into humor and exaggeration (celebrating the “so bad it's good” aesthetic). Alternative drag experiments with unconventional or avant-garde looks (breaking norms to challenge mainstream beauty standards). Club kid drag is known for its bold, futuristic looks (inspired by the nightlife scenes of the 80s and 90s). 

Myth: Drag is inherently sexual.  

Fact: Any art form can potentially be done in a sexual way but that doesn’t mean art is an inherently sexual thing. So, while some drag performances may include adult humor or themes (if they’re advertised for an adult audience), many other shows are family-friendly and focus on comedy, storytelling, or artistry. A drag event advertised as a family event will not be sexual. (It’s really just a common sense thing: You don’t expect kids movies to be sexual, just because adult movies also exist). 

Myth: Drag has only been around for a few years.  

Fact: Drag has a long history, dating back centuries. Men and women have cross-dressed in theater since at least the time of Shakespeare, and modern drag has roots in the ballroom culture of the 20th century. It definitely didn’t randomly spring up in the 2020s. 

Myth: Drag queens make fun of women.  

Fact: It’s more the opposite. Drag is a tribute to femininity and celebrates aspects of female identity and fashion. While some drag may use exaggerated features for humor, it’s usually done with admiration and respect, not as mockery. If it mocks something, it’s usually things like extreme beauty standards, gender stereotypes etc. 

Myth: All drag queens are famous and rich.  It’s easy money. 

Fact: The majority of drag performers are local artists who put a lot of time, effort, and money into their craft without making much. Only a small fraction gain fame or wealth, most do it out of passion.

Myth: Drag isn’t important for the lgbt+ movement. A ban on drag doesn’t really affect the community.  

Fact: Drag historically has been (and still is) an essential part of the lgbt+ movement, creating a visible platform for self-expression and providing a safe space where people can explore their identities. Drag performers have often led the way in activism, supporting many causes from HIV/AIDS awareness to transgender rights. A ban on drag doesn’t just limit artistic freedom - it threatens to silence a key part of queer culture and history. It also sets a dangerous precedent that can lead to further restrictions on our rights, marking the start of a slippery slope toward broader discrimination.

With all my love, 

Your Tumblr Dad 

[francesderwent]

it seems to me that our task—as Christians but also just as people who care about this country and don’t want to see it like this—is to step outside the us-versus-them, black and white thinking which elections love to encourage, and begin imagining our neighbors more generously and compassionately.

our politicians have spent the whole election cycle appealing to the very lowest common denominator—but that does not mean that when we picture our political rivals we must imagine the lowest common denominator. it does not mean that that lowest common denominator defines everyone who voted one way or another. the people who voted for the worst possible reasons do exist—people who feel genuine hate for those different from them, the crass and the vitriolic and the cruel, the power-hungry and the callous. these people are all real, and our politics has undoubtedly given them a voice. but again: I think we must challenge ourselves to hold in our minds a version of the “other” who is more human and more complicated than that. our principle should be built off of “innocent until proven guilty”—we should consider people as being politically thoughtful and well-meaning and conflicted, until we are beyond a doubt proven wrong.

the objection, at this point, would be the objection I’ve seen all over the internet: “okay, maybe people had better reasons in mind, but voting for a rapist wasn’t a dealbreaker for them.” and that’s a powerful bit of rhetoric. but, first of all, both sides were using the same arguments leading up to the election to dissuade people from voting third party or sitting the election out: “you’re not supposed to vote for somebody perfect, you’re supposed to vote for the lesser of two evils/the policies you most agree with/the party you think will most support your interests and the common good.” so it’s hypocritical to then turn around and accuse your political opponents of voting for someone who’s personally (understatement of the year) not perfect. and second of all, the notion of “maybe they didn’t like such-and-such policy or quality, but it wasn’t a dealbreaker” is actually exactly my point.

every voter has to weigh for him or herself which issues are going to be regarded as most important. as long as I’ve been alive, people have been pearl-clutchingly scandalized that others have weighed the issues differently than themselves, so the moral panic certainly is not new. but despite that, this is literally what our country is founded upon: there is no set-in-stone hierarchy of values. we all get to decide for ourselves what good is worth pursuing. note: I’m not saying this is a good thing; I think what we’re seeing now is precisely the problem with that system. but the point remains that you cannot insist on the importance of a democratic election and then be horrified that democracy will sometimes vote in favor of a good that you think is subordinate, to the exclusion of a good you think is foundational—that’s democracy for you! that’s the system! you might view it as despicably selfish and shallow to vote based on the price of eggs—but for someone who is very poor, that reasoning might appear far more serious than it does to you. what would be a dealbreaker for you might not be a dealbreaker for someone else.

everyone has to determine for himself or herself what the greatest possible good is which can be achieved by the federal government, and what the greatest evil is we should avoid. at the end of this determination, everyone ends up with his or her own little hierarchy of values. the horror of two-party politics is that unless your hierarchy lines up point by point with the platform of one of the main parties—and it almost certainly doesn’t!!—your vote will either not align with the hierarchy you believe to be right and just, or it will not have the power to put that hierarchy into practice in the real world. this is where imagining people generously and compassionately comes into play: perhaps someone’s first priority in casting a vote for the republicans was the price of eggs. now, instead of jumping to the conclusion that their second priority was expelling hated foreigners from the country or making it so gay couples lose visitation rights at the hospital, imagine that their second priority was something you agree with, something compassionately-motivated and understandable, maybe even something that wasn’t a part of the republican platform. now imagine what priorities they might have that weren’t presented as an option by either of the main parties—priorities they might share with you.

”but my morality is right!” you might say. “their priorities are misaligned and their hierarchy of values is wrong!” that may very well be true. but American democracy cannot recognize it, cannot give any more weight to the true worldview, because that would be taking sides. if you want a democratic system you have to accept the possibility that the correct and the popular might not line up. you might also say, “but they’re wrong about which policies are actually going to help them! the price of eggs won’t go down!” that might also be true. in that case, it’s sort of on the people with the good policies for failing to convince the voters.

you might feel aghast that other people weighed the things you disagree with them about as more important than the things you agree with them about. it’s an understandable feeling. but the crucial thing is twofold: one, unless you acknowledge their right to disagree with you—both in essential matters of morality and in matters of the relative importance of specific moral issues—you don’t actually believe in American democracy. and two, if we are to move forward we have to start acting as if the things on which we agree are more important to our humanity than the things on which we disagree. even if we voted based on the things we disagree on! when we interact with each other we have to focus on the things we agree on.

we have to believe that people are trying their best. we have to, when we engage in political discourse, engage with a hypothetical opponent who is not the easiest possible punching bag. and when we’re confronted with our genuine enemies—those who hate us and hate everything good—instead of dehumanizing them, we have to love them. I don’t end there as a little glittery good-feeling flourish to smooth over the difficulties, because that is the most difficult part. there is no version of this story where all the hurt and fear and division are erased simply by the “right people” winning elections. there is also no version of this story where all the hatred and sin and despair is solved by good people contentedly praying rosaries in little self-satisfied prayer groups. Our Lord reconciled the world to Himself not by the worldly power of conquest, and also not by kindliness and miracles and convincing people one by one to change their lives, but by His suffering and death. the reconciliation of our world will require our suffering, and our death to self. there is no other way out than through the radical love of the Cross—that while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us. He asks us to follow in His footsteps. imagining our neighbor as lovable is a good first step. loving him when he is not lovable is the next one, and the necessary one.

[noirvedette]

Chapter Two: The Union of Two

Satoru Gojo x Reader. (Royalty AU Series)

Synopsis: Wanting the best for your kingdom, you accept the marriage proposal sent by the Gojo empire to marry the new Emperor Satoru Gojo. What you don't know is that he has been yearning for you since he came to know of your existence and is determined to make you reciprocate his affections. How far will he go to earn your love? Series Warnings: Explicit language, smut, slight angst, acts of violence(not between the main characters), war. Author's Note: A longer chapter this time! Please let me know whether you enjoy it this way or if you'd prefer shorter chapters. Writing this during exam season so be prepared for irregular updates :) Word Count: 2.5k words

Today is the day. You and Satoru shall finally meet.

If things go as Satoru planned, you may marry each other in a few months.

To him, it all feels like a dream. Like a possibility of paradise.

He wondered what you would be like once you arrived, whether your smile would still be the reason behind his blushed cheeks, whether the calming cadence of your voice would still send shivers down his spine.

Whether you would still affect him the way you had five years ago.

He recalled every time he ranted about you to Jaeyun, telling him about how you captivated him to no end, squirming with embarrassment as the King jokingly called him pathetic for the nth time that day.

His heart started palpitating, threatening to abandon its place in his chest in favor of finding its way to you.

As he waited in his study, his mind went into overdrive.

What if you don't like him? What if you think that you are not right for each other? What if-

"Your Majesty." The Emperor's musings were interrupted by the voice of his secretary.

"Yes? What is it?" He inquired, exhaling a bated breath.

"The royal family of Aveloria have arrived." The secretary informed. "They await you in the salon."

With a nod and a small prayer recited in his mind, he strode to the salon.

-

Wow, you thought to yourself.

Satoru Gojo is a good-looking man.

Your mind was void of thoughts for the first few seconds within which he stepped into the room and interacted with your parents.

You took in his appearance—from azure eyes to hair that resembled the clouds in the sky—and it couldn't be denied that his appearance was nothing short of captivating.

The Emperor looked a little contrasting from when you saw him at King Jaeyun's coronation. Now, his features seemed more grown up, his jawline more defined and his eyes slightly sharper.

Eyes that were now looking at you, you realized.

"Your Majesty," You softly smiled at him, your hand outstretched for him to shake. "It is a pleasure to make your acquaintance."

"The pleasure is all mine, Princess _____." Satoru smiled back, engulfing your hand in his. "And please, call me Satoru."

"Satoru it is." You declared, your hand still in his. Your heart sped up due to the physical contact.

You watched as he shifted his grasp and softly kissed the back of your hand. You felt your face warm up at the gentle feel of his lips on your skin.

God, he even smells good, you think as the scent of citrus and cedarwood surrounds you.

Soon after, his family joined as well. His mother, Magdalena, and his sister, Isadora, whom you were already well acquainted with, were nothing short of welcoming.

Conversation ensued as everybody took a seat Your parents discussed the statuses of your respective territories and other miscellaneous topics, but you chose to remain quiet, observe, and sip your tea in between, taking in Satoru's responses and body language.

He was nothing like the version of Satoru that you heard about. Nothing like the cold, egomaniacal tyrant that you've heard others lament about via gossip.

He seemed... amicable? He answered your parents' queries with courtesy and posed thoughtful questions to indicate that he was attentive as well. He even asked your brother about the younger one's hobbies and interests.

It was the bare minimum, and yet it brought a smile to your face.

Maybe marrying him would prove to be enjoyable after all.

-

Once the conversation began to meet its end, teacups and sandwich platters once filled now almost, empty, you collectively decided that it was time for you and Satoru to have a conversation in private. You followed him into the art gallery and watched him shut the door before facing you.

Feeling overwhelmed by nerves, you turned to look at the paintings.

A particular piece caught your eye, so you went toward it, admiring the landscape of the shell-pink tulip field before you. 'The Magnificence of Naturality,' the name of the artwork read.

"I take it that you like this one." You felt the warmth of his presence as his saccharine voice slightly soothed you. "Are tulips your favorite flowers?"

"Tulips are beautiful, I will admit, but hyacinths have to be my favorite." You smiled at him, your fingers playing with the sleeve of your dress to direct your anxiety elsewhere. "Which painting here is your favorite?"

"This one here." He pointed to the one beside the tulip field, directing your attention to it. "It's called 'Chasm in my Soul'."

In the aforementioned painting, a man and woman are at a dock, presumably just married, as they are in wedding attire. They appear to be slow dancing, with another man not too far away playing the violin.

A sigh of awe left your lips as you took in the intricacies of the painting. From the ripples in the water to the lace detailing in the bride's wedding dress, little was left to be desired.

"I understand why you like it so much." You turned to look at him, watching as he stared at the painting in admiration. "It's beautiful."

"It is." He smiles at you before decidedly changing the subject.

"I know that our previous interactions have been brief, but I really admire you, Princess _____." He began quietly, clearing his throat. "I genuinely hope that we can find happiness together."

He looked flustered, almost shy in your presence. You had no words. No idea how to respond to such passionate words.

"As far as I know you, Satoru, you seem nice," You started. "But I think we need to get to know each other more before making a decision."

"Of course! I agree completely." A grin bloomed on his lips. "We have much to learn about each other."

"I'll ask the first question," You took the lead, turning to look at the artwork once more "Why is this painting your favorite?"

"The shared happiness between the newlyweds is so heartfelt. It's a love that's quite rare to encounter," He began, his expression turning into one of fondness. "You can discern the comfort and solace they find in each other due to the artist's mastery."

"You were the last person I thought would be a romantic, Satoru." You teased, smirking up at him.

"I could show you just how romantic I can be, Princess." He smirked back, moving closer to you.

He's flirting with you. You barely maintain your composure while trying to muster up a response.

"Maybe I would like that." You reply, slightly breathless.

"Accept the proposal and I promise you, I will." His eyes darted to your lips for a quick second before meeting yours again.

"I need to think about it," You teased once more, an easy grin twitching on your lips. "I hope you'll be patient."

"I'll be anything you want, _____." Unlike you, he was serious, his words containing an intensity that wasn't previously present. "I'll wait for as long as you want me to."

His expression was one of determination, ready to wait for you as long as you wanted him to.

Little did the Emperor know that he wouldn't have to wait too long at all.

You had already made your decision.

-

Once you returned from the art gallery with Satoru, you exchanged pleasantries with his family to end the night, his mother whispering in your ear about wanting you to be her daughter-in-law, making you blush in the process. He pretended not to hear her, choosing to believe that the surge of warmth he felt was completely unrelated to her hushed words.

That night, once you returned to the palace, you quickly bid good night to your family as you were tired due to the day's festivities. You sluggishly walked into your chamber, leaning your forehead on the door once you clicked it shut.

A gasp left your lips as you turned around.

There in the middle of your room stood a familiar landscape of a tulip field. 'The Magnificence of Naturality' glinted in the lighting of your room, along with a bouquet of hyacinths placed on your nightstand. A smile bloomed on your face as you noticed a note on the bouquet.

'The hue of these flowers may be beautiful, nevertheless, nothing will be as alluring as you always have been.'

The Emperor is an abundance of surprises, it seemed.

-

[SEVEN MONTHS LATER]

The wedding would be the very epitome of royal luxury.

It was to take place within the ceremonial cathedral, every crevice of the building embellished in burgundy and gold accents.

The general public was elated to hear the announcement regarding your wedding. Others mused upon what the union between two extremely powerful nations would result in.

You stood in the dressing room, staring at your satin dress in the mirror, admiring the corset bodice and flowy skirt. The jewels in your crown glistened in the natural light. A few minutes remained before the procession would begin.

Needless to say, you were trepidatious.

This moment didn't feel real. Nothing about this whole ordeal felt real.

In a few hours, you would be married to an Emperor. A very influential one at that.

Within the few months between the confirmation and the actual wedding, you rendezvoused with Satoru many more times. He treated you to elaborate dinners, took you to explore his land, bought you all the best street food, and gave you an opportunity to mingle with his citizens who would regard you as the Empress.

By the time you were done recounting all the experiences you've had with Satoru in these few months, a dazed smile formed on your lips.

There was a knock on the door, followed by Isadora walking into the room. "Nervous?"

"A little." You released a shaky breath.

There's nothing to be worried about, _____." She comforted you, noticing your hands slightly trembling. "We're all here for you, okay? This is a joyous occasion, my dear. Cherish it."

"I will." A nervous laugh left your lips, making her chuckle in return.

She nodded towards the door and then looked back at you. "Shall we?"

You responded with a curt nod, took her hand, and followed her out of the room and into your chariot.

Into your future.

-

Clad in his military attire and regalia, Satoru stood at the altar awaiting his bride-to-be.

He wiped off the sweat on his hands for the nth time that day, the cold temperature doing nothing to calm the heat within.

His mother sat in the front pew and smiled at the sight of him so anxious as Jaeyun tried to make him relax.

Suddenly, the crowd went silent, announcing your arrival. The doors to the cathedral slowly opened and you came into his view.

Satoru had never looked more in awe in all twenty-two years of existence.

No man will ever be as fortunate as me, he thought to himself.

You looked enchanting.

You maintained eye contact with him, a soft smile gracing your features as the long, dramatic train of your dress flowed behind.

You stopped and turned to bow down to his family and yours, sending Heeseung a teasing smile once you noticed the tears in his eyes.

The priest then began the ceremony, blessing your marriage with unity and prosperity.

You exchanged glances with Satoru now and then, returning his grin with your own each time until it was time to exchange your vows.

You placed your hands in his own as the ring-bearer found his place beside the both of you.

"I, Satoru Gojo, take thee, _____ Amiria, to be my wedded wife, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death do us part, according to God’s holy ordinance; and thereto I give thee my troth."

With that, Satoru slipped the intricate gold ring onto your finger, his engraved initials catching your eye.

"I, _____ Amiria, take thee, Satoru Gojo, to be my wedded husband, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death do us part, according to God’s holy ordinance; and thereto I give thee my troth."

You smiled at each other as you slipped an identical gold ring onto his finger, your grins widening as you took note of your initials on the wedding band.

The priest then confirmed and blessed the wedding once more, deeming you married. You could hear the cheers of the crowd that had amassed on the church grounds, congratulations being hollered in unison by the people outside.

Soon, the guests started to file out of the cathedral to make their way to the private reception.

You and Satoru, however, began climbing the stairs to the third floor of the church within which the balcony was located.

There, you would make your first public appearance as a couple, greeting and thanking the crowd for their celebrating your union.

The public appearance also entailed sharing your first kiss.

You tried not to think about it too much and instead, tried to live in the moment, deciding to focus on your hand in Satoru's.

Once the doors to the balcony opened, the both of you walked to the front, waving at the crowd with your unoccupied hands.

The cheers and happiness that emanated from the crowd were positively overwhelming, and Satoru could tell. To lessen your nerves, he drew circles on the back of your hand with his thumb, effectively soothing you.

You turned to face Satoru as he did the same. He cupped your face with one hand as you placed yours on his shoulders.

"It's just you and me, okay?" He gently smiled at you as you nodded. "Just you and me."

Two heartbeats later, his lips met yours.

The sound of the crowd cheering melted into the background as you kissed. It was gentle, teasing even, and you could feel each other smiling in your moment of passion.

Once you pulled away, you mind was hazy. You felt your face burning up as the cheers got substantially louder. You turned to wave at the crowd once more.

In the enclosed area where your family stood, you found Heeseung discreetly pretending to vomit, coaxing a laugh out of you.

Once the final goodbyes were said, the departing procession began.

You and Satoru climbed into your shared chariot, thus marking the beginning of the trip for your honeymoon to Damona Isles, a tropical island located in the south of Aveloria.

-

Taglist(open): @baepsays @laaalaaaloooppppsiiieeeee @iamrgo To join the tag list: Send an ask ♡

[literallyjusthereformods]

Mod folder's cooked still, sharing photos of my sims from my gallery.

Not my preferred method, but I'm dying to share them! So anyways here's a mega photo dump.

Cade E Cherrypop! (Normal/Ruined)

My love for sentient entertainment animatronics is one that will forever remain unshaken. Cade E Cherrypop is the sentient android mascot of Cade E Arcade! (Thx to the new chibi preset by @sdmsims, another little mascot will be along shortly as a friend)

After society collapses due to a zombie-apocalypse-plus, the arcade falls into ruin, and Cade E eventually reawakens in the ruins in her second withered form, sun-bleached, dirty and damaged.

Xelleen Wisher

Xelleen Wisher's a gaming streamer in this world's analog to Twitch! Despite his anxiety disorder, he does his best to put up an optimistic and energetic persona for his audience. He really loves cute things, especially cats and small collectibles! He's also very, very good at videogames, dabbling in speed runs and challenge runs.

Xelleen was created by me as a very positive character. He combines physical traits that are painted as a stereotypical "neckbeard" image (acne, overweightness) with features of the "gamergirl" aesthetic (cute clothes, makeup, lots of pink.) He stands as his own person, defined by neither stereotype.

The bottom/last pic of the three shows his face without his makeup on!!

Steelie Buzzkill

(Wouldn't Be Possible Without @sdmsims's Anime Mod!!!)

Ordered as an Incarnate (an Incarnate is a special type of android commissioned to be a real-word version of a fictional character) of somebody's OC, Steelie's shipment was intercepted after the law recognizing android sentience was passed. His company dumped him and his peers on the side of the road near a rural town.

Since he was freed before artificial memories were programmed into him, he doesn't know what character he's intended to be, and he really doesn't WANT to know.

He works at IHopTopic, the compound store that exists because in this universe, IHop and Hot Topic had some sort of business deal from hell that led to a combined location.

(Between you and me, his design SOMEBODY's fannon ship child OC, but I won't say more than that, nor do the medias his parents are from exist irl.)

The rest will just be character images with short descriptions. I'll likely make individual posts later on going in more depth!!

Torren's a model! He models both clothes and makeup.

Torren's photographer, and general voice of reason. They're bascially buddies.

Aniyo loves hanging out in malls and drawing fanart for their favorite animes. Above all though, they love animals!! Their aspiration is to be a rescue caretaker for animals that need them.

A small trunked rodent I created called a 'rummager.'

It's too bad I'm missing the cc for this one, because I'd love to show their whole design in CAS. I really like this one. They have a lot to do with a certain collapse plotline.

Owner of a tattoo shop. VERY supportive of their artists, and probably one of the best bosses ever.

Tattoo artist working for Crim.

Another one of Crim's hired tattoo artists!

Third tattoo artist out of four in Crim's tattoo shop. (The fourth one's too short to show in gallery, sorry.)

Runaway teen after something really bad happened at home. Navigating the post-collapse hellscape with her horse.

Apex Zombie who's territory spans an entire abandoned city. It's antenna syncs up to the abandoned traffic cams, giving it eyes all over the urban ruins. As a side effect, the old digital billboards flicker to life in monochromatic imagery when it approaches.

@ssspringroll because I definitely used some of your CC in this. Idr where, but I DEFINETELY did. Also, you're one of my favorite creators, thank you for existing <3

[windvexer]

Six Directions Banishing for Removal of Malfeasance, and Protection Against Same

A version of a spell taught to me by the Beloved Goat, similar to other rituals that have been taught to me in the past. This spell requires no materials, but may take some playing around with it in order to get the feel of things.

The feel of things is the necessary component for this spell. We also need these definitions* to help feel out the right things:

Malfeasance: Wrongdoing against responsibilities and duties. Something should have happened according to honor and obligation, but instead something wrong was done.

Betrayal: Violation of trust.

Harm: Hurt, damage, unjust effects.

Identifying the problem

The first step is to conjure into your awareness the powers of malfeasance, betrayal, and harm that have been enacted against you.

OBFUK (observe, believe, feel, understand, or know) that within the universe are things harmful to you. Within the universe, malfeasance has been done against you.

Stay with this idea, considering that this is a force that exists in energetic form, and can therefore be manipulated and changed with energy. Play with the idea until you are able to OBFUK that malfeasance against you exists and can be dealt with.

Repeat this step with the concepts of betrayal and harm.

The more you understand and feel these ideas, the better. In this stage you are casting a net by defining what it is you want to deal with.

Contemplate what it really means to have your trust violated. Contemplate what it means for people to have responsibilities to you, and the debt that is created to your wellbeing when these responsibilities are ignored or neglected.

Dwell with these ideas until you have got a pretty good idea of what it is you want to banish and protect against. This stage may initially take several minutes, but with practice may be completed speedily.

Banishing

The second step is to banish malfeasance, betrayal, and harm in six directions. This step is the same for each direction, except you just turn in a circle and/or or re-envision the bisecting line.

Face north. Mentally bisect your body at the midpoint (solar plexus if lying down, middle of skull to top of feet if standing, etc).

OBFUK (observe, believe, feel, understand, or know) that this line of bisection extends infinitely across the universe. You will repeat this envisioning, so play around with it until you are comfortable with it.

Once you have gotten steady with the idea that a divide is going through your body that completely separates the universe into "the north," you are ready to banish.

Say, think, or sign, something quite like the following (note the four distinct sections; identifying problem, setting intent, commanding action, demanding results):

I see the malfeasance that is to the north of me. I see the betrayal that is to the north of me. I see the harm that is to the north of me. I revoke these things. I rebuke these things. I banish these things. They fade into the earth and into the blackness between stars. They turn to ash and dust and settle into the forest and into nebulae. They scatter to the winds and become the colors in the sunset. They sink into the waters and become algae the fish and frogs feed on. To the north of me, malfeasance, betrayal, and harm enacted against me are banished. They are no more.

It's best to stay with this portion until you are personally satisfied that you've said the right things. You may like to go on a diatribe about how the energies are burned by hellfire and consumed by demons, and so on.

The spell is all the better if you stay with each direction and gnash on the energies until you are satisfied that you have settled on the right words. Repeat sections as many times as you like, using any words that inspire you. Polish is less effective than conviction.

Protecting

After you have banished in one direction, re-focus on the bisecting line. In the middle of your body, on the axis of that line, is a core of power.**

OBFUK (observe, believe, feel, understand, or know) that this is your personal power.

That power is ready to flow around you in a spherical shield that protects you.

Say, think, or sign the following:

To the north, I am protected. I am protected from malfeasance. I am protected from betrayal. I am protected from harm.

As you intone this, OBFUK that an impermeable, impassable, perfect shell of protective power pours forth from you in a hemisphere, wrapping around you from east to west, entirely protecting you from what is in the north.

Repeat this portion as many times as necessary, or play around with it a bit, until you feel satisfied the protection has occurred.

Moving in 6 Directions

Repeat the Banishing and Protection step for each of the six directions (north, south, east, west, above, below).

You may go in any order you like. I move clockwise from north, hitting east, south, and west; then turning north again to finish above and below.

Each time you work in a new direction, adjust how you envision the bisecting line that goes through your body.

Your goal is to envision the line in such a way that all six lines intersect at the same point, if possible, marking a singular point. The banishing pushes everything outwards from this singular point.

In order to accomplish this, moving around or readjusting yourself may be necessary.

Remember that each time you conjure the Protection, it is a hemisphere. This means it necessarily overlaps the others. Half of the eastern hemisphere will overlap north, and the other half will overlap the south. The above and below hemispheres will encapsulate all for hemispheres before it.

You may find that banishment and protection are easier or harder in different directions, which is normal. Work in each direction until you are satisfied both with the banishment and the protection.

As you move through subsequent directions, you may find your hemispheres interlock or layer in ways you weren't expecting. Let the energy moves as it desires, as long as it conforms with your standards of protection.

When you have worked in 6 directions and laid down 6 hemispheres (to create 3 total overlapping spheres of protection), move to the finish.

Sealing

There are 3 complete spheres of protection around you; one created by the joining of north and south, one created by the joining of east and west, and one created by the joining of above and below.

Whether or not these spheres seemed to combine, or were combined, in earlier steps, seal everything now to properly finish the protection.

With your focus on yourself (not necessarily placed upon any direction), intone the following:

The protections to the north of me and to the south of me join together in perfect unison and perfect harmony. I am infinitely protected from all malfeasance, all betrayal, and all harm. The protections to the east of me and to the west of me join together in perfect unison and perfect harmony. I am infinitely protected from all malfeasance, all betrayal, and all harm. The protections above me and below me join together in perfect unison and perfect harmony. I am infinitely protected from all malfeasance, all betrayal, and all harm. I am infinitely protected from all malfeasance, all betrayal, and all harm.

The spell is complete.

[*The definitions are for the purpose of this spell, so we can sniff out what we are working on like a bloodhound sniffing out a rabbit. Dictionary definitions may differ.]

[**This is true for the purposes of the spell but not necessarily true in any other circumstance]

[gazeofseer]

🩵 Wⁱⁿᵗᵉʳ Sᵒˡᵃᶜᵉ ❄️

‧̍̊·̊‧̥°̩̥˚̩̩̥͙°̩̥‧̥·̊‧̍̊ ♡ °̩̥˚̩̩̥͙°̩̥ ·͙*̩̩͙˚̩̥̩̥*̩̩̥͙·̩̩̥͙*̩̩̥͙˚̩̥̩̥*̩̩͙‧͙ °̩̥˚̩̩̥͙°̩̥ ♡ ‧̍̊·̊‧̥°̩̥˚̩̩̥͙°̩̥‧̥·̊‧̍̊

‧̍̊·̊‧̥°̩̥˚̩̩̥͙°̩̥‧̥·̊‧̍̊ ♡ °̩̥˚̩̩̥͙°̩̥ ·͙*̩̩͙˚̩̥̩̥*̩̩̥͙·̩̩̥͙*̩̩̥͙˚̩̥̩̥*̩̩͙‧͙ °̩̥˚̩̩̥͙°̩̥ ♡ ‧̍̊·̊‧̥°̩̥˚̩̩̥͙°̩̥‧̥·̊‧̍̊

'Life has been quite weary, and I had so much to share the shed of my spirit, but not has a flush of storm but more like a divine solstice trance between the seasons, the sun during winter warm yet deeply cold and engaging with from my bones, wish someone heard me, rather than saying anything to me, if not all these things what can I feel is a lie? Or Life itself?'

°°°°♡°°°°°°°♡°°°°°°°°°♡°°°°°°°°♡°°°°°°°°°°°°

Pick a Pile of guidance for your soul (;

°°°°♡°°°°°°°♡°°°°°°°°°♡°°°°°°°°♡°°°°°°°°°°°°

Image.1

'Confusion is the only clarity, I have right now all the people around me feels perfectly fine and fit to whatever they get and give, while I am still at a thought why would somebody do that to me? What did I lack exactly to be ostracized by the living society? Why can't have emotions, why, and exactly why..?

The rage seems quite resilience but that does not mean you are not burning within, like the depth of the blue flames underneath the ocean you exist in this world with your utmost compassion, when one fails as a human they fail to be anything further, but who defined that part? Too many questions is juggling all the answers you have received so far but deep down you know what is yours and what is not.

Still letting go all at a pace seems like a game of pull and push where you may fumble off everything from your hands.

But isn't that beautiful to realise what you were holding was an mere idea and not an entire reality to that?

Be it people, be it a thing, its limitation is end to what they can reap here with you on this surface so let things be, is how you let go, let happiness be happy, let sorrow sorrow itself, sink with this reality where truth prevails, even beyond the thickest curtains that has been shed and covered.

Winter Season Guidance & Blessings );

- Aquarius, Gemini and Saggitarus in big three you may feel all your life so far has been somewhat gloomy or questionable of which you have no answer to this following season you will have a major breakdown which will begin. Pilling up as small conflicts, chaos and confrontation throughout the November.

- One thing you have to do is break your ego, you have this subtle of it where you do not show off but keep it as a fake guard so merely people don't bother you but it has been blocked your sense of living entirely where every choice you make seems wrong and regretful and every other action becomes a repent.

- Blessings, that follow through is protection timely guidance on your journey as long you are on a receiving edge then on a push away where you will suddenly realise even if you feel horrible within yourself people are there who are kind, loving and will reflect exactly what you are meant to feel within.

Signs : You are on your own kid by Taylor Swift, ring lover, six fingers, mole on feet or behind neck. Ground, Shed and drive through the chaos towards peace.

Image.2

'Enduring life as if it's a badge that I have to carry and show so that don't bring the worst at my table so never left the idea of being the best in the room even if I was clumsy I slammed disciplines out of passive aggression which failed my scores to repeat the same mistakes, again and again nobody is a problem but I am, at least that's how I feel.. because I don't care about what others think..but do they even think that I exist too? That never being the one or the last hurts like the middle child who neither belongs to dad or not to the mother? Like a lost and found thought I carry myself like a baggage full of grief barely smiling at lies anymore choosing to cry over the truth as better as I feel'

You have a special message from your soul ancestors, who could be you or from your tribe ;

- It's not your first time here you have 8 as prominent number and Saturn's 8 influence you may be attracted towards infinity sign if not all these you find these strange connection with things but that may not resonate like you have not much with moon but there is something keeps your drawn towards it.

- Your ancestors by soul are people who are waiting for you as an reward after you complete certain set of karmic cycles and journey throughout the age of 23 to 25 of you have passed then these are the years, you may even heard death or something illness or fatigue around you.

- The place you work/study at seems toxic enough to bloat or drain your energy you are being asked to wear some solid protection crystal or evil eye or carry some iron nails or tie a black knot thread on neck or wrist.

- They are here to assure your present self that you may feel what's the point of living tomorrow if all I have to do is die today, what if I not only survive the bests within me and reach my success as somebody in a worst state keeps you worried but take this as a release then stroke attested nothing is final unless you decide it is.

Signs : Mess it up by Gracie Abrams, Capricorn, Venus earth sign, saturn rings, introvert, queer, cynical and thinking throughout the sleep.

Image.3

'Wish, world was a kind place so that violence would have not been the way to attain, chaos would have not reaped peace, and sorrows would have not be awarded with the happiness, the constant sell and buy has consumed my heart enough to think where did I wet less by to be who am I ? What if I love myself? And still not chosen to give? Would I be mean judged and hated for? Can't I choose myself for one fucking time? Oh that foulness in my soul speaks so does this make me impure? Why can't I just live

Your soulmate has a say (;

- You had quite relations based on intent of compassion and comfort so whenever there was change it went a bit into the hands of confusion, enclosures and uncomfortable for you where you stood for the sick unless you become one and they all left one by one.

- You kept losing people because they were your soulmates reflecting you on different level even if they were opposite on the surface.

- You attract elderly people, be it a woman, men you have this demure and mature gaze that pulls people with intellect finding you adorable but it turns them off when you get pissed off and a cute mess which can't be controlled.

- Your soulmate assures you to carry on this journey you are on the right path, growing greys recently in your hair? Something about white, off whites and lighter greys are sign also the cardigan.

- Stop, finding a end to your love let it expand with you wherever you go, is how you will meet me.

Signs : Daydreaming, Lucky Girl, Pearls, Water Signs, Air signs, Stars, Night Lovers, His name starts from E, W, A and S. He is a random person who will enter by or during Christmas by this or next year's, avoid any red or yellow color his favourite colour is white.

.

Hope this reading reached the parts it was meant to !! ❄️🩵

[roguelov]

The Vengeance Saga release date got announced, so here’s another angsty idea for you:

Morpheus returns to the Dreaming after well over a hundred years in imprisonment. As he makes his way back to the palace with Lucienne, he hears what almost sounds like the faintest gasp of breath, but he simply disregards it as he focuses on getting back. They return to the palace soon enough, whereupon he asks Lucienne about his love and if they abandoned him, too. Just as Lucienne goes to answer him, they both hear a quiet voice echoing through the ruined halls, singing softly: “And though I never thought that things would end like this, just know, I’ll be here. Waiting…waiting…waiting…”

The Dream Lord follows the voice until he finds the reader splayed out on the ground within the very heart of the realm. Their voice is soft from over a century of disuse, but they continue to sing until they finally get sight of Morpheus. It’s here that Lucienne explains that the reader ventured into this place in order to prevent the realm from decaying further, pouring all of the magic and power their shared union with Morpheus offered them in order to keep it existing.

- EPIC!anon

EPIC ANON YOU ALWAYS HAVE SUCH LOVELY IDEAS! But oooooh this could go fully angst of his love dying (potential haunting the dreaming) or bedridden and very sickly while Morpheus helps … I’m going angsty for this one 😈

“Waiting,” a gentle hum echoed in the halls.

Morpheus followed after the voice, a voice which had provided him strength over his years away. A voice that he never forgot, a voice that spoke kind encouraging words, a voice which brought clarity and sanity during his imprisonment. For if it wasn’t for such a kind voice, he needn’t know where he would be or who he would be upon returning back to the Dreaming.

“I’ll be here, and I’ll be waiting.”

“My lord -“

“Hold on, Lucienne.” Morpheus twisted his head, trying to locate the direction of the voice.

Lucienne, who had trailed behind Morpheus, wore a hard mask yet it crumbled as the pair crept closer to the heart of the realm.

Morpheus turned and tried not to blindly rush forward. Lucienne sighed heavily then straightened her back and followed after her lord. Perhaps, an explanation wouldn’t reach him. She wished she could, but seeing would make it true.

An undeniable truth.

Venturing further into the Dreaming, below the castle and through winding corridors, Morpheus entered a room. If it could be called such. It was archaic with stone sides with ragged edges and runes with the center smoothed out. No torches or sunlight touched this place and yet it was lit by an unknown source, a soft yellowish hue. And oddly, a beat thrummed here, a heartbeat.

This, this was the true center of the Dreaming. But, why did the voice come from here?

Scanning the room, Morpheus quickly noticed a rock in the center of it all. Where nothing should be, there was something. It wasn’t a piece from the ceiling. No, it was such a strange shape. He approached, curious and fearful. His hands trembled, but the air around stayed a steady calm. The rock grew details and more defined shapes the closer he walked.

Lucienne stayed back allowing Morpheus to come to the discovery himself.

Standing next to it, he realized it was a person. A person curled up on their side with a small smile curled upon their lips. His heart sank at the familiar features.

It couldn’t -

A voice gasped.

Morpheus’s eyes flickered up. A silhouette sat on the statue of the lying body, a ghostly silhouette. The ghost bore a striking resemblance to the statue. It all finally clicked in the Endless’s mind: body and soul had separated.

The ghost leapt over the preserved body, rushing to Morpheus. He couldn’t move or speak.

You, his ghost and the luring voice, had so much to say. You smiled brightly, and cupped his cheeks. Your hands were somewhat solid, yet were freezing against Morpheus’s skin. “You’re back,” you greeted him.

Morpheus had to snap himself out of his stupor. “I’m sorry,” he leaned towards your hand. “I was too late.”

You shook your head. “Nonsense, it doesn’t matter.”

His fingers curled around your wrist. If he squeezed more, he knew you would evaporate away. “I abandoned you, my love.”

“I don’t feel like I was.” Your bottom lip trembled. “I - I was just so worried you had died - or - or that everyone in the Dreaming will if I hadn’t -“

“Why do you worry about others and not yourself?” He asked. His eyes glazed with tears. “You are gone, my love. And yet, you care not for yourself.”

You sacrificed yourself for me, for our home, a price I will never be all to repay.

“But I’m not.”

Morpheus blinked, “… I … I don’t understand.”

You smiled through the tears and pain. You placed a hand to his chest. “I’ll always be in your heart.”

Morpheus closed his eyes and leaned forward. He pressed his forehead to yours. “I don’t know if it will be enough.”

“It will.”

It has to be.

“I lost so much, I -“

“You can rebuild,” you chirped back.

“… I don’t want to if you are not apart of it.”

“But I am.” You looked back at your body in the heart of the Dreaming. “Not all of me, but a part of me will live here and all our memories will live in your heart.”

“It is not enough,” Morpheus gritted his teeth.

“It never is, my sweet king.” You tipped his chin so he looked at you. You pecked his cheek. “I’m just happy I finally got to see you again.”

Morpheus swallowed back the tears. “As am I.”

You smiled. “Just know I’ll always love you.”

“And I will always love you.” He kissed you softly, pouring all his love collected over the years into it. “And thank you for saving the Dreaming.”

“I will do it again in a heartbeat.”

“I know.” Taking a deep breath, he whispered, “Goodbye, my love.”

“Goodbye, my sweet Morpheus.”

[bluejay-in-write]

🌌

[mochayoubi]

a fellow japanese learning friend told me there's 2 major "weed-out" learning curves to japanese, and that's 1) learning hiragana and katakana and the 2) learning kanji.

but I propose that there's a 3rd difficult learning curve and that's when you're in what I've called The Intermediate Soup where you don't have any specific thing to work on anymore but you know that you aren't There Yet

[lovesickeros]

☆ de fontaine

{☆} characters furina {☆} notes cult au, imposter au, drabble, gender neutral reader {☆} warnings angst, suicidal thoughts, hurt / no comfort {☆} word count 1.4k

This wasn't fair. This wasn't fair. This wasn't fair!

She thought, for one moment, she could put the mask down and breathe – for one moment of daydreaming, she thought she could just be Furina. She thought she would finally get to live the live she should've had in the first place, the life she threw away to play God to an audience who saw her as nothing but a circus animal, dancing to their whims. Furina just wanted to be selfish for one brief and fleeting moment..and it was gone before she could even grasp it in her hand. A comet soaring past far out of her reach.

She can barely keep her hands from violently shaking as she looks down at them – broken and bloody and more a corpse then a person – and she feels so numb she can't even feel the rain pelting against her back. None of this is fair, she wants to scream, why is it always me? But her voice is silent beneath the torrent of rain. She wonders if the ocean would take her if she sank into it's depths – just for a moment, she wonders how it would feel to finally be able to sleep at ease.

Furina is tired.

But Furina is nothing if not useful, isn't she?

So she forces her feet to move, dragging against the stone beneath her heels, and drags their bloodied body into the nearest empty building, letting the rain do the work of washing away the smeared blood following her path. The smell makes her feel sick, the feeling of it sticking to her hands and gloves makes her lightheaded, but she persists. Because Furina is useful, because Furina won't let them die out in the rain, because Furina won't stand by and just let them rot on the streets like some..pest.

Furina wants to go home. She wants to sleep and she isn't she if she wants to wake up, this time. But she keeps going anyway.

Because it's all she's ever done, and the habit sticks.

An Archon she may not be, not anymore, but the expectations of five hundred years still linger like eyes on the inside of her skull. They watch her, pry and prod at her thoughts, mocking laughter and judging eyes following her as she forces herself to dance to the song they weave with glee. Furina never stepped off that stage – she's still there, she thinks, watching the crowd stare at her in disdain as the curtain call looms above her like a guillotine. She still hears Neuvillette deliver her damnation and salvation with a trembling voice, still feels her hair stand on end when electro crackled like the crack of the whip, Clorinde's blade aimed at her like a loaded gun.

She's trapped on that stage and she never left, not really.

She hates it. She thinks she hates them, but it's not their fault. They didn't ask for this, didn't ask for everyone to turn against them, didn't ask for her to save them. Neither did she..yet here they are, she thinks.

She tries to tell herself she's in control this time, though. She can stop performing her part in this horrible, bloody play any time she wants. It makes her feel better, just for a little while, if she convinces herself she's still Furina, painfully human.

And Furina has always been good at lying.

It's the believing that's the hard part.

There isn't time for her to wallow in her own self pity, though. They're still bleeding out onto the dusty, creaky floorboards of some random, broken down house and she's just standing there as the blood stains the wood. She can fix it – she's good at fixing things. She's done nothing but fix things – try to, anyway – for five hundred years. She can fix a little wound, how hard could it be? Her hands are clenched so tight they ache as she kneels down, wincing at the creak of the floorboards beneath her heels– she hesitates just long enough to wonder if she's making a mistake before she peels away just enough of the outer layer of their clothes to see the deep, bloody gash across their chest. She tries not to think about it – it's deep, too deep, and she feels dizzy just looking at it, but she's handled worse, right?

Furina can fix it. That's what she's good at.

She doesn't feel so confident when she tries to wrack her brain for..something. Five hundred years, and a little wound stumps her? No, she had to have learned something, right? She's decidedly not trying to buy time because she's panicking, parsing through hundreds of years of memories like flipping through a book. Furina isn't made for this, not really – she's running on nothing but adrenaline and she's really not sure what she's doing, but she's trying. And just like before, it won't be enough, will it?

She'll fall short again – she'll be too late to fix it before she's alone again.

Furina was an Archon..used to be. What use would she have for that sort of knowledge? Which makes her predicament all the more harrowing and bleak. What was she supposed to do?

Furina had heard it first hand, that vitriol in Neuvillette's voice. She isn't sure she's ever heard him that..angry before. She's not sure he would listen to her if she tried, either. And that scares her more then anything. All of Fontaine was up in arms about this..imposter, yet here she was, staring down at them bleeding out in front of her, and she was trying to save them.

Why? Why is she throwing away her only chance at normalcy for a fraud? Why didn't she just turn them in?

They were dying – that should've been a good thing, shouldn't it? So why didn't it feel like it?

"Why you?" Her voice breaks as she speaks in harsh tones, grabbing the front of their shirt in trembling, bloodied hands. "Why now?" She wants to scream, to demand answers they can't give, to claw back the reprieve she was promised after five hundred years of agony..and all she can do is sob into their chest, pleading for an answer that will not come. "Why me?"

Silence is their answer, and it hangs heavy on her trembling shoulders as she cries.

Of course they don't, she thinks bitterly, no one has ever answered her pleas spoken in hushed sobs. Not her other self and certainly not them.

Furina has always been alone. Furina will always be alone.

Because Furina never left that stage, never left that moment when she looked at herself in the mirror and took up a mantle too heavy for her to bear. She always finds her way back eventually. There's no one on the other side anymore – she stands alone on a stage, waiting for an inevitable end she isn't sure will come.

"Please," She pleads through tears and choked sobs, clinging to them like they are all that keeps her from sinking. "Please don't leave me, too." The words burn on her tongue – how pathetic is she that she craves companionship from the bloodied body of the imposter? Perhaps she's truly lost her mind after all these years..perhaps she's finally gone mad. She must have.

But their presence is like the first feeling of gentle warmth upon her skin as the sun crests the horizon, like the gentle lap of tides along her heels, the sway of branches and leaves as the wind blows through them like an instrument all it's own. They are the soothing sound of rain against the window as she watches the dreary skies in fond longing, the first bloom of spring as color blooms upon the landscape like paint had been spilled across the hills and valleys.

They are like the faint spark she carefully nurtures and stokes, so fragile even the smallest wind could blow it out like a candle. She cradles it within her palms, pleads with whoever will listen – prays that someone finally listens, because if not for her, then for them.

She's failed to protect too much already, let too many people with so much trust in her fall between the cracks of her fingers like grains of sand. She won't let them go – she can't.

If nothing else, if she couldn't be saved when she begged for salvation from that five hundred year long agony, even if she never got that chance..

Furina will make sure they do.

[gingermintpepper]

I've seen so many interesting and fun greek myth ships over the years both divine and mortal supported by text and just for fun, and yet I fear tonight, I will be throwing my hat into the ring as a propagator of niche greek myth ships because like, no seriously how is Aristaeus/Dionysus not already thing.

[themthistles]

i think that while micro labels can seem useful and affirming ultimately they're isolating and kind of an obstacle to your understanding of self. that's because you can never find a word specific enough. there will never be a label or two labels or even ten, twenty of them to perfectly capture and describe all of your thoughts, feelings, experiences, preferences, needs, interests, identities, etc. because you learn more and more about yourself every day and then you change and your wants and needs change with you. having to hop between labels, fearing that you don't 'fit' into a label anymore (both in your own and others eyes), worrying how soon your current label will wear out, questioning if you'll ever fully fit a single one. all that causes a lot of uncertainty and anxiety which could be avoided by just picking a more general thing and molding it according to what it means to YOU. because words will always mean different things to different people, you will never be understood immediately and maybe never completely by anyone but yourself and that's fine

[suolainensilakka]

Mortifying ordeal of being perceived vs the burning itching need to talk about the lingering will. Woe, tag ramble upon ye

[gothhabiba]

a lot of analysis of race / sex (including intersex-ness) / gender / disability &c., both online and in academe, is seriously hampered by a failure to consider how these categories are constructed historically