#the more desperate I get

[someheartsaretrue]

I honestly don’t get it. I do things.

I run. I cook. I am in community theatre. I have multiple creative outlets. I have great friends who I love and love me. I have a wonderful pet who is happy and healthy. I have hobbies. My life is full.

So why the fuck do I feel so worthless and empty because I don’t have a partner? And yeah, society pushes that on us as the ultimate goal, I get that. But I still want that for what feels like self-motivated reasoning. And yeah, it’s perfectly fine to be single, I get that too I’m not saying it isn’t. But I sure feel like shit about it.

Is it even about any of that? It feels like either I am at place, or the world is at a place where what I want is no longer available to me. I’ve hurt people. Recently. My therapist would probably tell me I haven’t hurt them as much as I think. But it still feels awful to know that I’m just one more shitty fucking guy in the world.

I always want to be better. And to recognise things in myself that can improve. It just feels like the goal posts are constantly moving and I’m two steps behind all the time.

[nyanrial]

making little snowmen ⛄⛄

[qoldenskies]

i think its so funny when people take the way donnie acts at face value even though its a horrible lie because he's a horrible liar, while understanding leo is bullshitting very well despite him actually being GOOD at bullshitting. many such cases

[wineanddineloseyourmind]

the transgender urge to curl up like a small fluffy animal against someone you love’s warm body and make little mewling and sighing and whining sounds as they pet you and praise you for having tried so hard to be human until you fall asleep

[doctorsiren]

Thinking about how (a humanoid) Bill would see Ford be older after those 30 years (because that’s how people work), and so to try and appeal to him again, he makes himself look older too (I mean, he’s WAYYYY older than Ford actually, but I just mean visually)

But then after he’s killed and sent to the Theraprism, he goes back to his original twink look, and I say this because I already did a drawing of my humanoid Bill in prison and I like how that design worked with his pathetic traumatized orange jumpsuit look more than I think I would like it with an older looking version 😁 plus uhh I don’t wanna deem that drawing “not canon” to my brain so yeah

[choccy-milky]

smooth, seb 👍 ((redraw of this scene from the goblet of fire))

[welcometogrouchland]

[ID in ALT] I've made posts before about Talia/Dick co-parenting Damian moments (will never happen but let me dream) and this came to me in a vision. Took me ages to finish for some reason 😭 and then even longer to post

[tubbytarchia]

I told you I never stop thinking about merpearl

[h0estar]

every now and then i look back on this GIF i have of nalu during tartaros arc and cry about how this particular scene alone solidifies the beauty of their relationship (natsu holding lucy's hand gently in the face of chaos and panic did wonders to my heart)

[feelo-fick]

chilaios telepathy compilation. btw.

also these ones arent telepathy i just think its fun that they defend eachother + are on the same page about alchohol :

[theonlymadmanonmars]

Hi hello hi. As an AroAce individual in a QPR who has no desire for a romantic or sexual relationship, I think shipping Alastor in QPRs is so so fun and people should do it more. I also think it works for a good amount if not all of the ships I've seen him in.

Alastor and Rosie: Hell yeah. They're already great friends and every interaction we've seen between them has been pure and adorable. Rosie Gently guiding Alastor through his identity because he isn't exactly up with the slang. Them going out for tea and human flesh Sunday afternoons. Them giving each other forehead kisses and holding hands platonically.

Alastor and Angle dust: Mhmm. Angle not really wanting Sex or romance after all he's been through. Angle respecting Alastor's identity and not pushing for anything more than friendship. Alastor not really liking Angle at first because of their differences, But tolerating him regardles. Alastor explaining to Angle that Romantic relationships don't have to involve Sex (I'm an Asexual Angle truther.) Angle offering Alastor a hug that Alastor reluctantly accepts. Them cuddling at night with a pinky Promise of nothing more.

Alastor and Vox: Go ahead. A fic about Alastor trying to Navigate exactly how he feels about Vox, Because when he died the term AroAce didn't exist, so he thinks it's romantic attraction, Maybe they kiss and Alastor is like "Ha! No!" Maybe that's why they had their falling out? Who knows.

Alastor and Lucifer: So So SO much Yes. (This is my personal favorite) The two of them hating each other, but putting up for each other for Charlie's sake. Slowly growing to actually tolerate and maybe even like being around the other. Exchanging snarky remarks in a more playful way. Alastor finding Lucifer sitting in a pile of ducks and despair and offering his hand to help him up and take him to the hotel. Never letting go of his hand. Fuck Enemies to Friends to Lovers I want an Enemies to Friends to Qpr arc goddamnit.

I do think it's okay to ship Alastor even outside of QPR's, BUT. If you do, don't just ignore Alastor's identity. AroAce people get far less representation than the rest of the LGBTQ+ community. I can think of one other canon Character off the top of my head. So it's not okay to erase the little rep we do get. In the end I think it's important to listen to what AroAce people have to say on the matter, it is our representation after all.

[artbyblastweave]

Funniest thing I've seen recently, and not funny in a ha-ha way, more funny in a "the endless entropic void gnawing at my will to live" way, was somebody asking around for alternatives to Neil Gaiman, in the light of Neil Gaiman's ongoing fall from grace. As though what we're currently sitting through isn't the collapse of the carefully curated "Good Guy Neil" image that caused people to parade Gaiman as the same kind of preferred progressive alternative to, say, Rowling. As though we won't be in the same goddamn situation in a few years or months, with some number of the new progressive sci-fi/fantasy darlings- not all of them, to be clear, but at least some of them- when their impeccably-curated marketing implodes in on itself and they're revealed to be the same kind of sex pest or abuser. Can you not see the wheel to which you are strapped. The game of human pinball you are condemning yourself to with this mindset. Maybe you do see, and you're just resigned to taking it one soul-crushing disappointment at a time, one "I never would have guessed" after another. I mean I think we all need to get resigned to that one way or another, sun's gonna go out before it stops happening

[otaku553]

I am making an AU that is Sooooo self indulgent

ASL x Nine Sols crossover :)

Don’t ask me for context because I have none!! Usually I enjoy crossovers but I think Nine Sols is an amazing standalone piece of media that is very difficult to fit other characters into reasonably given the setting and circumstances. I feel like trying to add characters from other media to it would take away from the narrative strengths of the game— the way everything is centric on the Tao and fighting by deflecting and inaction and how death is such a key part of Yi’s journey and character development and the path for all solarians in general.

In short, I just wanted to see ASL as little cat people and that is why this exists :) I like when they’re just Here and There with no reason and people are like “what. How did you even get here”

I am at present also working on hanfu designs for the three of them so this is a little teaser :))) I’m especially proud of some of the little details— on Sabo’s sleeves are the characters 革命 for 革命軍, the revolutionary army, and the dragon on his robe also has three horns to match the revolutionary flag. Then on Ace’s glasses on his hat, the characters are 笑 and 哭 in place of his usual smiley and sad face. I had some ideas for Luffy but in the interest of keeping his design simple his design is a lot more plain.

I imagine it as a side quest for Yi to go around New Kunlun and help the brothers find each other. I have no clue how they would have gotten into New Kunlun in the first place, or how they would survive for so long without Vital Sanctums and soulscapes. Maybe they just have their own spaceship and happened upon New Kunlun and managed to get on before all Dusk Guardians disappeared, and then got separated while on the ship and individually hid around different places to avoid both the Tianhuo and the mutants?

I feel like Ace would chill around the factory area since he’s most at home with fire. Maybe he would venture out to the agricultural area once in a while to grab food. Sabo would camp out near the Empyrean District passages. He’s not suicidal enough to go around the Empyrean District itself, especially after finding out that the weird monsters there don’t die. I think he would have some grudge against the Tiandao Council for being composed mostly of the rich and powerful. The Fengs are especially high up on his shit list, which is why he hangs out in the empyrean district in the first place. And Luffy,,, somehow would just be in the four seasons pavilion, I think. He finds a way to sneak in, probably pretty easily while Yi is in hiding because the security is down without Abacus activated.

[ruporas]

endless love!

[ID Two drawing collage pages of Vash and Wolfwood from Trigun Maximum. In the first collage, top corner, Wolfwood looks upwards disgruntled with a flushed expression, lying against a pillow, as his hair is being pet by Vash's hand. Next shows Vash and Wolfwood from behind, Wolfwood with his top bare and hickies covers around his nape area. Vash lifts hair away from his nape and asks, "More?" Wolfwood nervously says, "No." Next is a side profile of Vash, his arms around Wolfwood from behind while Wolfwood rests his hands against Vash's arms. Next to this are two smaller drawings; Vash turns to Wolfwood and says repetitively, "Wolfwood, Wolfwood..." Wolfwood, not looking at him, says "What?" He finally turns his head and looks shocked as he exclaims, "So close!" Vash says plainly, "You just noticed?" Below these is a drawing of Vash and Wolfwood sitting together as Vash kisses and hugs him from behind with his right arm around Wolfwood's neck and his left hand around his side. He also has his right leg propped against Wolfwood's knee. Bottom of the page has a comic. Wolfwood looks annoyed, speaking to himself, "Where is that idiot?! Need to get out of town before--" A chat bubble exclaims, "Wolfwood!" The next panel shows Vash running from the townspeople, small text saying "Get him! Vash the stampede!". Wolfwood, mad and about to pull the Punisher off his shoulder, says, "Argh, you fucking dumbass!" Vash exclaims, "Ah, don't!" before pulling Wolfwood into a quick kiss. He then tugs on Wolfwood's collar and says, "There's no need to shoot, just run!" Wolfwood stammers, "R-right..." with a flushed, dumbstruck expression.

Second collage; Top left, Wolfwood spoons Vash in bed, his arms around his chest and the other beneath Vash's head. Vash has his hand on top of Wolfwood's as he sleeps while Wolfwood lies awake. Behind this drawing is faint sketches of Vash's face. In a small panel, Wolfwood hides in Vash's neck as he mumbles to himself "Stop. Stop thinking embarrassing things, Wolfwood..." Beneath this drawing is another of them in bed, Vash now turned to Wolfwood and a hand on his cheek as he kisses him good morning. In a simpler style, Vash wraps an arm tightly around wolfwood with the text "snork mimimi" next to him while Wolfwood says, "We need to get up. Spikey! HEY!" In this corner, there are faint sketches of Vash and Wolfwood; one of them looking at each other; Vash kissing Wolfwood's forehead; Wolfwood saying, "Hand" with an outstretch hand and Vash says "ok" behind a drawing of them holding hands, both turned away from each other shyly. Next is a 4 panel comic. First shows Wolfwood's face getting squished by Vash's hands with the text "squish" around his face. Next, his cheeks are stretched with the text "Chee--" Wolfwood then hits Vash's face with his palm, exclaimining "That hurts!" The last shows Vash on Wolfwood's lap, smiling to himself as he continues to have Wolfwood's face in his hands. Next to this is another comic; A close up of their hands, Vash holding Wolfwood's with both of his. He then kisses the palm of Wolfwood's palm and says, "They're soft!" Wolfwood looks at him with flushed cheeks, "There's no way that's true..." END ID]

[puppppppppy]

Alex and my farmer Cosmo (he/him)

[medicalunprofessional]

never change, man !