#the lyric in question being: hi i am the problem its me

[sgiandubh]

Considering it wasn't a Covid bubble where people come and go and her blossoming relationship with Tony pre-airing of the show was not soiled by intrusive fans. Considering she already knew Tony and he and his family are Scottish live in the area. Thank you for making another connection between Caitriona and Tony early on, which led them living together in Scotland by 2015.

Dear Considering Anon,

I, too, am considering your very serious problems in reading comprehension and logic, darling. A COVID bubble is, actually, the opposite of people 'coming and going' and I think, in this regard, you lived that period of our lives under a rock, or you are just lamely trying to lie to yourself (and nobody else). I would, therefore, kindly ask you to stop insulting our shipper collective intelligence, or use a better online translator to English than good, old Google.

In the same vein, you just know who the most prominent intrusive fan was, very early on OL's timeline, as you also know perfectly well that she was not a shipper. Again, you must take me for an amnesic fool, who somehow forgot who was frantically phoning the resorts where S was supposedly spending time with non existent paramours? Or who somehow forgot the trolls on your side who systematically go ask anyone (loosely) connected to SC (and even innocent casuals who happened to spot S or C), all sorts of frankly embarrassing questions? But hey, you people have no shame, never did.

You might want to put a brake on waxing lyrically about that 'blossoming romance', considering C denied in the Irish press even by 2015 or 2016 being involved with anyone, which totally excludes McGill from the equation (why hide it, since you just wrote with great confidence there were 'no intrusive fans', at that moment?). And also considering you are perfectly unable to substantiate McGill being remotely present near her, anytime before the EIFF opening night gala in 2015 (you know, the one with that penguin pic that gives you the shingles...). [Later edit: that is right, I forgot about that flute pic and the other guy who called her 'McGill's girl' on Twitter - is that formal proof of a relationship ?].

By the way - evidence of EIFF staff unnecessarily adding a pic of both C and S (and unnecessarily mentioning her, in the process) years after the event, here:

Considering you cannot prove she already knew McGill before landing in Scotland, in September 2013, and you only rely on meager speculation about her contradictory press statements over time on the topic, I would be more prudent, if I were you. I know they are Scottish and I also know where his family lived and still does, in Glasgow - none of your business and I couldn't care less.

Thank you for understanding that if you want to be treated with basic politeness on this page, you should perhaps think twice before sending this #silly garbage, and also stop calling people you do not know things like 'Dearly Demented', 'stupid' or 'mental ward', as you like to do across the street. In many tones, from the brutal and cheap to the condescending ('giving lessons to someone', when you fail to make the very basic distinction between a budget project and its final implementation - just a not so random example).

Until then, kindly fuck off!

[iamtheoneandonlyever]

when you overhear tons and tons (like 4) people at your school talking about st and how they think its a brilliant show and you are stuck here like don't ask them about byler don't ask them about byler don- bc you live in a very queerphobic country and will probably get targeted

(idk if queerphobic is a word but since almost all are looked down upon, i am making up this term)

the worst part- i start analyzing them to see if they would ship byler by what they do and how they talk and such and they do indeed fill some criteria but at the end of the day you are still living in a queerphobic country

[scekrex]

Hello there gorgeous ✨

Prompt idea with reader being a part of a band that's heavily inspired by Babymetal, like the type of music is pop mixed with metal, the outfits, the whole vibe basically. Heaven's got a new band in town and it's reader's band (You can either create a name for them, go without mentioning any name or whatever else you choose to do with that! You can even ask me and we'll both think about the name c:). Adam at first was like "Tf? New band getting popular? Pfft, they probably suck, no one can out-do the first fucking man🙄" but then when Lute asked him to actually go and check it out with her since she got curious when one of the exterminators went there and told her that it was absolutely fucking awesome. They go and it's literally just a blast. The crowd work is astonishing with how the fans, even the shy ones, have no problems with being vocal with the lyrics or movement, the light effects are just top notch, sound quality is gorgeous and clear, the vibe on its own is just one of a kind and Adam is like "Yeah, shit, this is actually really cool, like wtf" but the biggest magic is when he first hears and then sees the reader alongside the two of his like "backup vocals" (I wouldn't really call Mo or Moa that, but I can't find a better word rn) absolutely rocking out, enchanting everyone as if he was some sort of magician, making Adam start questioning his sexuality, simply going "Am I fucking gay? What's actually happening right now?"

Recommendations for like ideal crowd work representation would be any song but my favourite is this one:

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=E8pcFhPZQYg&pp=ygUKSGVhZGJhbmdlcg%3D%3D

Light and visual effects I'd probably say this one:

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=Hru3zh8l2kE&pp=ygUUQmFieW1ldGFsIGRpc3RvcnRpb24%3D

And the one that could work the best in my opinion to like WOW his snarky bitch ass would be this one:

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=ALznpaBWUTo&pp=ygUMbWV0YWxraW5nZG9t

Rock on my superstar! 🤟🎸❤️

Sup babes, I changed the vibe a lil, going in a more punk-like direction. I don't like describing outfits so the only thing that got a description is reader's vest bc low-key important. Anyway I hope you like it!! xoxo

Part 2

And I dream to be your fantasy

pairing: Adam x male!reader

warnings: language & sexual tension

note: not beta read bc fuck you I don't have beta readers

A new band was blowing up in heaven, their posters were everywhere and Adam was already pissed off by it. Who the fuck did they think they were? Playing in his area? Fuck no. He avoided them as best as he could - considering that their posters hung in every window it wasn't that easy to do.

Lute landed next to Adam, she was visibly excited about something so the first man stopped with a sigh and turned around to look at her, “Sir, have you heard about Divine Fuck-Ups?” Adam growled as he gave Lute a nod, “Bitch, their posters are everywhere, how could I fucking not?” Lute simply rolled her eyes at him, “Yeah well, the other exorcists won't shut up about how good they are so,” the exorcist pulled out two concert tickets. Adam looked down at her, his expression a mix between hatred and betrayal. Had Lute seriously bought two tickets to a different band's concert? Especially when that band was playing in his fucking area on his fucking main stage? Apparently she fucking did. “You bought fucking tickets,” Adam grumbled, pointing out the most obvious thing ever. “The concert is tonight, I'll pick you up so we won't be late.” And it was not like Adam could have disagreed with her, Lute was onto something and the brunette was pretty sure she'd move mountains to get his ass to that concert.

-

The concert was… different than what Adam had expected it to be, the crowd was loud and wild, there were multiple mosh pits and none of their fans stood still for even the finest moment, they were constantly moving, vibing, enjoying their music to the brim. The first man had to admit: he was impressed by that. The only thing that bothered him was, that Lute had picked him up so fucking late that they were basically behind the massive crowd, enjoying the concert from the distance which also meant even though Adam was tall, he wasn't seeing shit.

So he simply grabbed Lute's wrist and pulled her with him as he made his way through the crowd, careful not to hurt anyone. Because while he was all for rock ‘n’ roll, the most rock thing to do was to watch out for each other at concerts, a rule he had learned very early.

He had somehow managed to make it to the front row, Lute by his side as he finally laid eyes on you for the first time. Your hair was sticking to your forehead, it was soaked in sweat just like the rest of your body - that was probably the reason why you were shirtless, wearing nothing but a black jeans vest with golden spikes on its shoulders. Your arm was wrapped around the waist of your background singer and you and him shared a microphone as you growled the lyrics of Lute's favorite song.

The background singer that had been in your arm only moments ago, was now dropping to his knees in front of you, grabbing your hips and wiggling them, his face only a couple centimeters away from your crotch, before he quickly got up again. Holy fuck that was hot. Adam was visibly mesmerized by your performance, not just the singing, growling and shouting but the way you owned that stage. The way you made the people go wild, your harmony with your band mates was a once in a lifetime sorta bond and the first man loved everything about it.

The song ended and you breathed heavily into your microphone. “Make some noise for Cove,” you yelled only to lick the man's jaw, Cove - the background singer that had gone down on you during your performance - was enjoying it, a little too much to Adam's liking but who was he to judge? Well he was the first man, that's who he was. “Okay, whatcha say to one more fucking song?” The crowd screamed and cheered, demanding the offered song like it was their air to breathe, shit even Lute screamed at the top of her lungs. Her white hair was all messy, her clothes clung to her body due to her sweating so much and she looked like she had one hell of a time.

The guitarist played the first three cords and the people around Adam were cheering, clapping and whistling. Then the drummer joined in and so did the bassist. Then your voice echoed through the air and Adam felt like he was in trance, all he needed was your voice and your body.

He wasn't able to dance, to enjoy the music, all he was hearing was your angelic sounding voice, it was enchanting through and through. The way you were moving your body held him in a chokehold, the amount of control you must have had over every single muscle was pure bliss in his eyes. He didn't even realize that the last song had ended and that you had just spoken your goodbyes, that's how lost he had been in your voice.

He really didn't understand why but everything inside of him was screaming to get to you, to make you his, to have you. Where those thoughts came from he didn't know, he wasn't gay after all but fuck you had looked hot on stage, better than any woman could have.

-

Don't ask him how, but he had managed to get a backstage pass once the concert had ended, it definitely had its advantages to be the first man. So there he was, waiting for you to arrive and once the door opened his eyes were basically glued onto you. “Hey there babes,” a cocky, confident smirk was on his lips as he pulled his mask off his head. You gave him a quick glance out of the corner of your eye as you walked over to your dresser, “So you're the bitch who thought of him as important enough to get backstage even though my team told ya no, huh?” Adam tilted his chin upwards as if that was something to accomplish, something to be proud of, “The one fucking and only.” You just rolled your eyes at his answer as you turned around to face him properly, “Listen, if you wanna hook up, now's a bad time. I have to get ready for another gig in just a couple of hours on the other side of heaven, be a fucking babe and leave, okay?” Oh but the brunette wasn't planning to, not now, not when he had the person he desired right in front of him. He walked over to you, his hand was quick to grab you by your hip and pull you in, the first man leaned down a little and murmured, “Oh babes, no need to act like you're fucking hard to get, I know you want me just as much as I want you.”

And that actually caused you to chuckle, because the confidence was so fucking wrong. You had just told him no and yet he acted like he was the man of your dreams. “Cutie,” your finger slid down his chest and stopped at his sternum, tapping him there harshly as your voice dropped an octave and your expression shifted to seriousness, “I do men, not boys. Come back when you decide to act like one.” And fuck, that did things to Adam, things he would never be able to admit to, not fully at least. Because you were acting like hot shit and for the first time he wasn't annoyed by it. Because you were hot shit, fuck probably the hottest shit he had ever laid eyes onto. “Now move your pretty ass out of my dressing room, babes,” you gave the first man one last sweet smile, your finger traced along his jaw and he leaned into every bit of touch he got from you. His eyes were clouded and for the first time in very fucking long it wasn't just lust that fogged up his mind, but interest and maybe even love.

[mechalily]

LYNEY, LYNETTE, FREMINET × YOU, THEIR BELOVED

fluff, slight mentions of stalking (?)

Lyney never repeats same tricks, always coming up with new repertoire every show. Although.. you are an exception, the only person he doesn't mind rehearsing old tricks to. If you ask Lyney to show "that one super cool thingie!!" he'll do it without a second thought. He never thinks twice when it comes to your desires.

And whenever you are feeling down, Lyney is always there for you. If there are tears rolling down your cheeks, the magician pulls a handkerchief out of thin air and whipes it away gently.

"Ma chérie, you can cry as much as needed — I am here for you, but remember: even though you are undesrcibingly beautiful, smile really adorns your face", — somehow Lyney materializes a rainbow rose out of his pocket and presents it to you.

Lynette is always observing, keeping the tiniest details in her mind. Constantly noting minor changes, paying attention to circumstances is what she must do in order to fulfill her duties to the Father. Even though it may be selfish, Lynette mostly watches over you. Your every move, every blink, every sound — you don't want to know what she has found out about your persona. She needs to know everything about you to keep you safe (yes, this includes info such as your favourite color, favourite dessert and clothes you prefer to wear. Trust her!). Lynette is also the first one to take congnizance of changes in you. No need to tell her you've got a new haircut, got hurt or bought new jewellery — she already knows.

Lynette also notes to herself different traits of yours. If you waste time passing some silly quizzes and receive questions such as "how do your friends perceive you?", she appears out of nowhere to think for a few minutes and then gives you a serious, honest answer.

"Lynette, which object am I?"

"Lynette, which lyric fits me the best?"

"Lynette, who am I? Soldier, poet or king?"

Young lady's patience and seriousness during answering all this questions makes you melt.

Freminet's top priority is your well-being. He does everything to lessen your burden, spends days and nights trying to invent mechanisms which decrease the time you spend doing chores.

Too tired to cook? Freminet will most definitely construct some sort of automated pot: put the ingredients inside, and the dish will cook itself.

Lazy to do the laundry? Here, have this brand-new machine he absolutely-did-not-create-just-for-you. If the problems you are facing are common for Teyvat inhabitants due to its level of development, Freminet is going to outpace entire humanity and create 21st-century technologies, not even realizing the impact he'd made.

Because of his overthinking nature, Freminet plans everything 10 steps ahead. He checks the weather forecast everyday just to know if you need an umbrella or sunglasses today. Despite being extremely socially awkward, this precious boy asks if the dish contains foods that may cause your allergic reactions. He overcomes himself for you.

[starluvsx]

★𝐈𝐧𝐭𝐨𝐱𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠

𝐂𝐡𝐫𝐢𝐬 𝐬𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐨𝐥𝐨 𝐱 𝐟𝐞𝐦!𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫

proofread: yeaaa

word count:4k(lol plz send help)

WARNINGS: pt2 of jealous girl, toxic!Chris, smut but like for the plot yk, p in v, dick suckin, unprotected sex (safe sex is great sex kids😁👍), praise and degrading, crying, mentions of possible cheating, reader talks about being insecure, swearing, pet names, reader is def not standing on business.

A/N:here u gooo @urfavstromboli !this is too long holy shit.the smut part was so strange to write bc like I don't really like writing smut but I had to for like the story.also im sorry this took so long to makes started working on it right after pt1 and just forgot it was in my drafts LMAOOOO. also peep the special banner(I couldn't find any good lyrics).ok ill stop yappin and let you read.

𖦹 𖦹

✧SATURDAY

my heart beat sped up as I slammed the door in Chris' face.never being this upset with him in my life. I mean I never really thought he would choose another girl over me.Especially not one that has problems with me for no apparent reason. As I broke down into sobs I pulled out my phone and ironically called Nick, Chris' brother, knowing he would comfort me.

"Hey what's up?Did Chris apologize?" Nick asked through the phone.Once my crying was heard I think he got the hint of what had happened though.

"Can you uh..can you come over please really just... need someone right now."I stifled out as I paced around my living room.too many yet not enough thoughts running through my head.

"yea of course, do you want me to grab anything on the way?"Nick questioned sympathetically. I only responded with a small 'the usual' before we promptly said goodbye and I hung up.

✧NICKS POV

I heard the front door open as I shuffled down the stairs,Chris huffing and puffing as he stepped into my view. "How'd it go?"I asked even though I already knew how it went.I wanted to see if he would lie to me.

"horrible, its not even my fault though, shes acting like an insane bitch and is trying to make me choose between her and ash.fucking stupid.she needs to get over herself." Chris spat out.i was shock at his words about a girl who he used to love so much.the only time he talked about her behind her back was when he was saying how pretty she looked or how kind she way or how funny she could be.all of those feeling were now replaced by cold, rude, bullshit.

"don't talk about her like that, dickhead." I retorted.yes he's my brother and I'll love him no matter what but there is no way I would let him talk about her in such a way.especially when I knew that wasn't what he was like at all.

"what?! How am I the dickhead?" he yelled out as I turned my body to Matt's room in order to ask if he could drive me to y/n's.rolling my eyes and choosing to ignore the boy who had very clearly lost it.

"Can you drive me to y/n's?"I asked while poking my head into Matt's dark room. a small 'yea sure' being the answer as he got up from his desk.walking back into the kitchen area I was met with an angered Chris. God he was acting like such a child.

"don't ignore me,"he slightly shouted. "If I'm really a dick then there must be a reason!" my youngest brother said, looking at me soullessly.

"you literally were flirting with Ashley the other day, didn't  say anything when she insulted your girlfriend, when y/n confronted you about it you don't even care, and then when she asked you to make the very reasonable decision of either her or Ashley you get all pissed and start calling her an insane bitch, so yea I think that makes you a dick."I rambled on frustrated.

Chris didn't say anything before I walked toward the front door.or maybe he was going to but just didn't because of the situation.either way I don't think he really needed to say anything else.as I was getting my shoes on I could faintly hear Matt say "I know your my brother but if you hurt her anymore after today I'll kick your ass." which was followed up by my silence and footsteps towards Chris' room.

Matt huffed as he walked down the stairs and walked out the door to his car with me.Once we got in the car we both sighed deeply. "He's so stupid sometimes."Matt breathed out as he started the car and began to back out of the driveway.

"seriously, also we need to stop by the gas station."I replied.even though I was going to her house in order to comfort her and hopefully make her realize he's not treating her well and that she should just leave I know it would be to no avail.shes a hopeless romantic and there not much I can do about it.

✧YOUR POV

tears sprung out of my eyes like frogs with no hesitation. “Please please please let me get what I want” by deftones playing on my speaker. I looked into the mirror across from my bed as I laid on my side, locking eyes with my own reflection.I slowly picked my body up and now simply sat on my bed.still staring at myself intently.

I found myself simultaneously messing with different parts of my body and face.silently wishing they would morph to look like Ashley.she was perfect.the perfect weight,perfect skin,flawless makeup, model like hair.no wonder why Chris didn't mind her being on top of him.he probably wanted people to think that was his girlfriend.not me.why would anyone wanna be seen with me anyways.

The doorbell ringing for the second time this night broke me out of my thoughts.I slowly brought myself to my feet and dragged myself to the front door.as I opened It I was met with a sympathetic looking Nick holding a gray bag. "hey girl..."he slowly said.

I'm not sure if it was just my brain trying to distract me or what but I couldn't help but notice he had dyed his hair red again. "your hair...its not blonde anymore..."I quietly said.my words making Nick smile

"Yeah I know, just kinda felt like another change, i don't know.do you like it?"he questioned.

"I love it, looks really cool man.''I answered, tired eyes looking at him and realizing he was still outside. "oh shit sorry"I said while moving out of the way. as he stepped into my house I made eye contact with Matt who had most likely been waiting for Nick to go into my house.I waved to him with a small smile as he reciprocated through his car window.

I sighed heavily as I shut the door.remembering what happened earlier. "Okay so I got you red bull, skinny pop, oreos, mints and Lindt chocolate, oh and I got nerds for myself, you can have some though."Nick said once he walked over to my kitchen table, placing the items on said table as he listed them.I don't know how he remembers what I like to eat when I'm sad but this does happen a lot I guess.

I put my head in my hands and let out a deep breath.trying to unwind somehow.a ping was then heard from across the table.i knew it was Nick because my phone had been left upstairs. "Oh God, look who it is."Nick said as he turned his phone to face me. it was Ashley.she had sent him something on snap.

'half swipe it."I said as I made my way around the table, peering over his shoulder to see his screen.

"I don't know how."he responded, panicking.

"Just pull it from the left." I tried to explain.my help wasn't very useful though because he opened it instead. 'Are you mad at me?' read the message "is she fucking stupid.of course your mad at her?"

"She is stupid, that's why she looks like that.im just gonna say no to see what she says."the boy next to me said as he typed out 'no' followed up by 'why would I be mad at you?'.

she immediately opened the message and began typing "wow I'm surprised she opened that fast, probably cause she has no life."I snakily said as we both watched her bitmoji type.

''Oh bc of what happened with y/n the other day. 'she clarified. He was about to start typing again before she beat him to it. 'yk when she was a psycho bitch for no reason' was the next message. "psycho bitch?!oh I'll show her a psycho bitch!"I said as I shot up from my leaned over position on the counter. walking angrily towards my front door.

"y/n you are not going to fight her right now, especially not when you look like that.'' Nick reasoned as he set his phone down. "just forget about her.she's just an irrelevant cunt that has nothing better to do with her life but hate." the red-head said.

he was right.i don't know why I cared what she thought.but when I really think about it,I don't.i couldn't give less then a fuck about how she saw me.it was Chris' opinion I cared about.i wanted him to think I was beautiful, funny and kind.i wanted him to think i was perfect.i wanted him to be able to see me over Ashely.

"did Chris say anything about me?"I asked.switching topics to something more relevant in my head. The face he made when I said this made my stomach drop.Mainly because I knew how mean Chris could get at times and considering what had happened earlier tonight I don't think he said anything good.

"Do you want what he should've said or what he did say?"he asked as I made my way back to my previous placement.

"Tell me what he actually said."I answered.feeling like I was taking a leap of faith.but I knew if I wasn't told the truth then I would never have a chance of getting over this man.

"he was all like 'it went horrible, it’s not even my fault though, she’s being an inane bitch and is trying to make me choose between her and ash.she needs to get over herself.'"Nick said, mimicking Chris' voice to make it more light hearted.it was a little funny but the words made my eyes well up with tears nonetheless.

I was feeling so many different things.sadness, anger, stress but most of all betrayal.i mean he said it wasn't even his fault basically saying it was mine.my fault for being upset for a little bit.he would rather call me an insane bitch then just admit he was wrong and stop being friends with Ashley.that fat pig.

"what!?Ugh I hate him so much!!Why do I even like him?He treats me like shit,never listens and is always on top of other girls?!I don't even think I've heard him say he loves me in like 3 months!? do you think he's cheating?oh my God he probably is!"I rambled on.placing my head in my arms at the end of my words.i slowly began to sob into my own arms.once Nick heard my sobs he hugged my hunched over back.

"no don't say that.he's obviously not cheating on you."he reassured.his words didn't do much though because my cries only got louder and more emotional.my best friend ushered me up so he could hug me normally.i pulled away from the hug  once I was able to actually breath.looking up at Nick with tired, sad,eyes.thankful for him being here but also embarrassed for crying over his brother. "wanna watch a movie?" the boy sympathetically asked.i nodded a small yes before I grabbed all my snacks and headed over to the couch.

watching the movie was a good distraction for some time.but nonetheless I found myself thinking of him. how much I missed him and just wishing he was here right now.im not going to apologize though.I did nothing wrong no matter what he thinks.so if that means that we never speak again then I'm fine with that.oh who am I kidding, I'm definitely not fine with that.

✧THE NEXT DAY, SUNDAY

'come over please' and 'I miss you' were the two messages I had been staring at for at least five minutes.the sender being chris made this all the more strange and confusing.i mean he was just calling me an insane bitch yesterday and now he wants me to come over.but for some reason I caved.maybe he wanted to apologize or something.

I threw a zip up over my lace tank top and tied my gray sweatpants.sliding my crocs on as I stepped outside started walking to my car.

Once I began driving I found myself more fidgety in anticipation than what felt like ever before.fingers tapping against the steering wheel rhythmically and constant glancing at the ETA were I knew this.

As I entered the house using my key I felt anxiety rush over me.Matts keys weren't here and neither was Nick's jacket which he never leaves the house without during this time of the year.meaning that it was only the two of us in this house.

My footsteps felt heavy as I walked down to his room.something I had done many times now feeling unfamiliar.I knocked on his bedroom door lightly once I approached it. though as the door was opened I wasn't even aloud a greeting before he placed his hands on my hips and smashed his lips onto mine hungrily.i wish I could say I rejected the kiss but I couldn't.it was like he had put a spell on me.

he walked backwards as we eventually crashed onto his bed.i straddled over his lap as I deepened kiss.he swiftly flipped me over onto my back and moved me so I was sat up a little.i took the hint and unzipped my hoodie, throwing it off to the side while trying my best not to break the kiss.

he then removed my tank top.now revealing my bare chest to him "no bra huh?so you are still my slut." he said as a smirk formed on his lips.

"I was actually about to go to bed but whatever you wanna believe."I retorted.

"do you want me to fuck you or not?"he questioned, looking into my eyes.i stayed silent though.letting the wetness between my legs make my decisions. "that's what I thought."he darkly said. pale arms taking his own shirt off.toned body now all in view for me.

"you know what to do.''was my signal to take my pants off.i undid the tie on my sweats and slid them off.leaving my white laced panties on. "sit up and go on the side of the bed"he demanded.i did as he said.sitting on my knees a on the side of the bed I was closer to.he then came around to the side I was facing.once he was directly in front of me he dropped his baggy jeans and boxers at once, cock springing free.all 8 inches now stood in front of me.his pink tip leaking pre-cum.

I looked up at him innocently.as if I had never done this before.i then, on instinct, began to pump him with my hand slowly.my actions making his breath hitch.i placed my lips on the tip and began to lower my head.pace increasing every time I brought my head up.eventually his hands made their way to my hair and began to push my head into his cock roughly. "fuck just like that.keep going.use that perfect little mouth for something good for once."he harshly spat out looking down at me as he said that.i ignored his words though and continued to suck him off.

This feeling being lost on me for almost a week made my throat sting pleasurably.his grip on my hair tightened which told he was close.the signal making me go faster.if even possible.small whimpers fell from his cherry lips as I continued to work. “Oh God yes,please I’m…I’m almost there”he mumbled out, the words working as encouragement for me to keep going.then without warning I felt his cum shoot itself into my mouth.the salty savory flavor touched my taste buds as I swallowed.

Once he came down from his own high he looked down at me.i kept my eyes on his.looking up like a lost puppy. "fuck your so hot" he said as he grabbed my middle area and situated me on my back and so I was on his bed longways.once he laid down with me he whispered "sit on my lap baby"

I complied and did as he said.placing myself more on his legs then his actual lap because I knew he wouldn't be that easy. "you want me to fuck you?"he asked.i nodded 'yes' in response. looking down at him with pleading eyes even though I was on top right now. "use your words.you had so much to say before, what happened to that?"he teased.

"please chris just fuck me, ive been waiting for days!"I squealed out.thankful there was nobody else home right now. 

"good girl.."he hissed out.his words being my command to lift my hips up and hover over his cock.then without warning he thrusted up into me after lining himself up with my entrance.the sudden feeling making me yelp.he continued to buck his hips up into mine as I bounced simultaneously, placing my fingertips on his chest for some sort of stabilization.

moans that were higher pitched than my actual voice spilled out of my mouth along with swears and small pleads.my body was hot as I went up and down on him.his hands were at my waist, guiding my every move harshly. The pale boy grabbed my waist hard, making me wince at the pleasure mixed with pain.the idea that the boy who I was crying over last night was ramming himself into me right now made me feel guilty.but I can't help it.his touch is intoxicating.

my jaw fell open as pornographic noises flowed from my lips.eyes screwing shut and head being now hung low.i was so caught up in myself that I didn't even register the small whimpers coming from the boy underneath me. The noises being my key to realize he really did miss me.at least a part of me. "keep going baby, don't stop, i'm gonna-"I rambled on before being cut off by my own already familiar noises

"Me too..shit.."he whispered.

"chris fuck fuck fuuuuck"I strung out as I came undone on top of him.laying my body on his as he thrusted up into me again,chasing his own high. Whiny whimpers made their way into my ear as I felt him twitch inside of me.knowing he was close I decided to tease him a little by kissing his neck and leaving a trail of hickeys.my sensitive body not mattering at all to either of us.

"fuck baby" he groaned out as I felt his load shoot into me, coating my insides.we sat there in silence.sweaty bodies catching their breath.once we calmed ourselves he pulled me off him and situated me so I was laying on my side, facing the boy who replicated my current position."lemme get you a towel."he said before promptly getting up, putting his boxers on, and doing as he said.

When he came back and cleaned me up I couldn't help but stare at him.all his features slithering into my eyes. "Can I have a shirt?"I asked softy.not wanting to put my tank top back on because of the temperature.he only hummed an ‘mhm’ before tossing me a random black shirt with a white design on it.

"Can we talk? ''he awkwardly said as we both were now sat up and at least partially clothed. I nodded my head to signify I was listening."listen y/n im...im really sorry about earlier.i was a dick and I shouldn't have acted like that.i know you don't like Ashley and i'm totally fine with dropping her.i would rather lose her then you any day and i'm so sorry if I made you feel otherwise.a-and if your ever upset again don't be afraid to say something cause I promise I won't act like a dick again."he nervously rambled on.

I wish I had it in me to stay mad at him but I couldn't.i know this apology was just so I wouldn't leave him lonely and he would pull something stupid in a few weeks.but I can't help it.i'm in love with him and there's nothing I can do about it.

✧MONDAY MORNING

my eyes screwed shut almost immediately after they fluttered open, the bright sunlight causing this.i turned my head around to the best of my abilities to see if chris was awake and it didn't seem like it. I turned my head back and let out a breath I didn't know I was holding in. "you're finally awake."Chris said from behind me,startling me a little.

I hummed a small 'mhm' before trying to get up but to my dismay he pulled me back down to my previous spot. "I have to pee."I giggled.

"pee later"he mumbled, pulling me closer if possible.

"yea no thank you"I said before breaking out of his limp arms grasp and standing up to go to the bathroom.taking a mental note of my sore legs from last night.

"I see you limping!"he teased once I got into the bathroom.

"oh fuck off"I lightly shouted back.once I washed my hands I began walking towards his door, the idea of food in mind.

"Where are you going?"he asked from his now sat up place.holding himself up on his elbows.

"I'm hungry"I said while throwing on my sweatpants that had been tossed here last night.

When I got up the stairs Nick turned his head to me.shock and disappointment coated his face. "Okay I thought we agreed you hated him?"he questioned.Keeping his voice low knowing Chris was still in the house.

"ugh I know but he texted me last night and told me to come over and then one thing led to another and...look he apologized."I tried to reason.nick though, was not having any of this.i made my way over to the fridge and grabbed my strawberry smoothie from Thursday that had been left here by accident.Taking a sip from it while I turned around to face my best friend again.

"yea and he apologized last time, and the time before that, and the time before that.you have to let him go y/n.he's not good for you."Nick explained to me.I know he was right but I couldn't just get over him.I wasn't the type of person to just get over stuff like that.

"Well last night seemed genuine, okay?I seriously think he meant it.''I said before footsteps were heard coming from chris' bedroom which ended me and Nick's conversation.

Chris hugged me from behind and kissed the top of my head.nick shot me a "you need help" look and I couldn't do much besides give him a "yea I know" look back.the brothers began conversing but it was more like background music to me.

I know nick is right, he’s not good for me.but I can't help it.everytime I look into his eyes I feel like i'm sinking deeper in this pit of love I dug so long a ago for him.i hated that I loved him and how I knew he was gonna do me wrong.but with his arms wrapped around me like they were right now I can't help but leave that as a problem for future me.

[slytherinshua]

YOUR DISTRACTING KISS

genre. fluff. warnings. a little profanity and a lot of kissing. hwiyoung flirting SKDJS HELP. ME. i don't think it's suggestive at all, but...? pairing. hwiyoung x fem!reader. wc. 948. request. no. a/n. ITS INSANE HOW DELUSIONAL I AM FOR THIS MAN LIKE IT DOESNT EVEN MAKE SENSE HOLY SHIT IM SO DOWN BAD IM SCREAMING EVERY DAY BCUZ HES SO SKDFJHSKD(@#*$(???????

You loved watching your boyfriend write songs. He liked to do things the nostalgic way— spending his time in an old car garage with a crappy sound system set up, an electric guitar and bass at his disposal. He wrote down lyrics in a little notebook. He said he got more inspiration for the song when he wasn’t staring at a computer. 

Youngkyun had already been writing for an hour before you arrived with coffee for him. Your heart raced whenever you stepped into the garage, sliding down the metal garage door after you stepped in. You had made a lot of memories with your boyfriend in this old garage. You had even spent some dates here, and participated in more than a few makeout sessions.

Youngkyun looked as stunning as always, but what you would never get tired of looking at was his long hair and bare face. There was no arguing that the mullet style suited him the most, and it drove you absolutely crazy to think about. Along with his rings, oversized t-shirt and 4 or so loose-chained bracelets on his left hand, he looked like a proper rockstar boyfriend. You slid the iced americano over to him, flashing him a smile which he mirrored.

“Thank you, baby.” He muttered, focusing back on the lyrics he was jotting down, taking a short break to sip the coffee. You sat next to him, watching him work for a few minutes before taking out your phone. You heard a frustrated groan after a while and looked up.

“Need a break from this— ‘fucking frustrating.” He mumbled, tossing the notebook onto the table. He looked over to you, grabbing your wrist to pull you over until you were sitting on his lap. You wrapped your legs around his waist, pushing some strands of his pretty hair behind his hair.

“You’ll get it eventually. You always do.” You reassured. Your hand lingered on his face, feeling his soft skin beneath your fingers. You traced his cheekbone and he sighed, closing his eyes under your touch.

“Just want a distraction for now.” He told you, leaning his head back to rest on the top of the couch. His Adam’s apple bobbed up and back down as he gulped.

“Pretty.” You whispered to yourself— ever enamoured by your pretty boyfriend and his attractive features; one of the most attractive being his neck.

His lips lifted at your comment, and he opened his eyes again to look at you, “I was the one who wanted a distraction, not the other way around.” He reminded you, teasingly smirking at the way you quickly brought your eyes back up to his face from where they had previously been focused.

“We’re both a distraction to each other. I have a shift in an hour…” You trailed off.

“And?”

“And it takes 45 minutes to get there from here.” You completed.

Youngkyun laughed, “Then I have 15 more minutes to be distracted by you.” He pulled your face down to meet his, starting to kiss you slowly. He had always been a passionate kisser, sincerity and warmth shown to you every time his lips touched yours.

“Guess I’m going to be late… Again.” You breathed in between kisses. Not spending too much time talking before finding Youngkyun’s lips again— they were too addictive not to want to keep kissing. His lips always tasted like the orange lip balm he used.

“Is that a problem?” He questioned, pulling your waist closer to him. You shook your head immediately, both of you giggling at the situation. Your boyfriend sighed as you slipped your hands into his hair, the gentle movements of your fingers folding through his locks massaged the tension from his head, relaxing him further.

He kissed your lips again, always soft and gentle with you despite his evident frustration with his work. He had been shown enough many times in the past that letting out his pent up frustration through gentler actions worked the best. He just needed relaxation and attention, and you were more than happy to provide both.

He wished he could have your lips on him all day, especially when you shifted yourself to be able to kiss his neck. Your plush lips pressed short kisses to the side expanse of his neck, slowly travelling towards his Adam’s apple. Once you pressed another gentle kiss to it, you pulled your head back up, untangling yourself from your boyfriend and finally standing up. You glanced at the time on your phone and let out a laugh, slightly short of breath from all the kissing.

“10 minutes late already. Not too bad.” You grinned at Youngkyun and he scoffed. He held your hand back, stalling a little longer until you had to leave.

He gave it a gentle, loving squeeze, “Thanks for the distraction. Can I take you out for dinner after work?” He offered, staring at you with such an adoring gaze. He was so in love with you it felt like he was going crazy.

“I’ll make sure I look pretty for you, then.” You responded with a smile, “Gotta match up to you somehow.”

He frowned, “You already look absolutely gorgeous, angel. Don’t look too pretty. I’ll get a heart attack.”

“I’ll keep that in mind.” You assured him, grabbing your bag and heading towards the garage door, “Love you!”

He smiled as he watched you leave, calling out that he loved you too before you shut the door behind you. He picked up his notebook again, fiddling with the pen before starting to scribble words down. Thanks to your little distraction, he had found the perfect lyrics to finish the song.

↳ sf9 taglist: @eternalgyu

[pliablehead]

Heyo, what do you consider the top 5 must-watch EE interviews???

I AM SORRY I TOOK SO LONG TO ANSWER THIS and I think it's because I really don't have a proper answer!! So much of my deep dive into EE was done in one long hyperfixation spiral back when I was first getting fangirl-level into them, a good 6 or 7 years ago, and so I'm running into the problem of most of the interview content I've consumed all sort of homogenizing into one sort of blur of Lore that I've internalized and I am not doing a great job at separating out into its individual components! So, that said, the following list is probably not in line with what I'd actually ultimately believe to be the best, most crucial ones--it's just the ones my brain can call to mind at the moment. lol. BUT HERE ARE SOME:

serious/insightful: • Jon and Alex for Tape Notes podcast. (so not a must-watch so much as a much-listen, but there are a few individual clips from this on youtube in video form as well I believe.) RDF is my favorite EE album and I thought this was a hugely interesting look into their writing process and also had a bunch of cool personal stuff in it! Plus, I think it's a very good look at who the band are, like, "now" -- there's a lot of great content around from MA up through GTH, but by the time they were on album 4 and all like, 30+, and especially once covid hit and sort of changed the trajectory of like.. bands, in general, I feel like it's just been a different animal re: regular interviews etc. • this 2013 3-parter with Jonathan. It's been ages since I watched it but I remembered it almost immediately, and for some reason I'm remembering it as an oddly vulnerable Jon moment. just talking about things. (more good band lore! etc.)

funny/meme-y: • Mike and Jez at Isle of Wight. Unlike many others, I could not possibly count how many times I have rewatched this, and it is funny every time. The interviewer is a buffoon asking totally clueless questions and Jez is having absolutely none of it, he's just chomping his chewing gum the entire time, Mike's doing his best, it destroys me. • Mike and Jez look at memes. Less interview-y and more just #content but whoever edited this video did a TOP NOTCH JOB and it's one I often show to not-in-this-fanbase friends that can still be a fun look at the band and a good laff. • This very sweet one with Alex and Mike being interviewed by a literal child. Contains the infamous "Jeremy, and yes," which is one of my most quoted EE-related sentences ever • this Man Alive track-by-track, also audio only.. the BITS that Jon and Alex are doing. truly incredible stuff

just lads having a nice time :) : • the CAPSLOCK ON talkback - lots of pleasant band and lyric insight, and a great Jez cheese moment at the end • this livestream dot com session is some performing but some Q&Aing, so not really an interview proper, but the energy in the room is delightful alskdghj

other noteworthy bodies of work: • anything with Andy Backhouse. I'll be the first to admit that Andy can grate my nerves sometimes, he often feels annoyingly a little too simp-y or something, but the other side of that coin is that as a huge fan of the band he actually does always ask them questions that are like, Real, he Gets them, so it's guaranteed to be a notch up from just random music journos who are engaging with them on a more surface industry level. Nothing is more frustrating than watching an EE interview where the interviewer just so blatantly doesn't "get" EE's whole deal and doesn't know how to interface. Andy never has that problem ! • any episode of Chips of Chorlton that features them (I think Jon's been on twice and Jeremy once). Dutch Uncles are their friends and hearing them all shoot the shit in an extremely comfortable environment is suuuuch a pleasant and wholly different experience than when the lads are being Professional Music Band guys, even when the latter still consists of them doing fairly goofy things

A VERY LONGWINDED AND NOT ESPECIALLY COMPREHENSIVE ANSWER ?? !!!!! Ultimately I think I was the wrong man for the job. @hellkitepriest has way more of an archivist's nature sort of just intrinsically than I do, he can probably do a better and less ridiculous job akjdshglak

[probsnothawkeye]

At midnight Central Daylight Time on Friday, March 29, 2024, @athansmusic released his debut album. Limbo, the album in question, is a story of hurt, addiction, regret, healing, recovery, and content. Over the course of three years, Athan worked to create this album, pouring his entire heart and incredibly personal experiences into each of the songs. I originally intended on doing short form reviews of each song, trying to fit all of my thoughts into a tweet or less; but Limbo deserves far more than that. Each song tells a story and each story has a parallel; to reduce that to two hundred and eighty characters would be a disservice to the album and to you, the person reading this. Before we begin, I should make a few things clear:

Things I am not:

A trained musician

A professional critic or reviewer of any sort

Things I am:

A lover of music

Someone who was deeply moved by this album

With this out of the way, we are ready to dive into the world of Limbo and the stories Athan has weaved into it.

Song 1 - Limbo

The album opens, as you might expect, with the titular track. Limbo immediately gives you the sense of being stuck; stuck in life, stuck in your emotions, stuck in your own mind. “I’ve been stuck here / Stuck in limbo for days” is the line at the heart of the chorus and this sentiment can be felt in every inch of the song. The instrumentals of this song start with a simple beat that grows over the course of the first verse and bursts into a full life in the chorus. Athan has a propensity for voice modulation that works so perfectly with the instrumentals that are being layered. What is especially noteworthy is the way the chorus progresses from one of finality to one of hope. “I don’t think I can / I don’t think I will / make it out of here / Maybe I never can” becomes “I don’t think I can / or maybe I will / Make it out of here / Maybe I can”. Despite this sense of being trapped, being stuck, there is still hope. It’s that hope that will become a thread throughout the album as it goes from one of pain and regret into growth and relief.

Song 2 - Chronic

There are two sides to Limbo. Side A deals with pain and that is seen very clearly in Chronic. As a person with pretty severe depression, I latched onto Chronic right away; it’s the kind of song that reflects exactly what I’m feeling without the song or its creator knowing what I’m feeling. The lyrics portray a sense of listlessness and a lack of belonging that digs deep into the heart and squeezes it from the inside out. “Hold on tightly / to what excites me / Otherwise I might drown, shit, it’s tempting.” I have felt this exact thing multiple times in my life; hell, multiple times in this past week. There is an incredible amount of relatability in Athan’s lyrics– something that clearly comes from his personal connections to the songs he’s writing. You cannot fake that kind of emotion and it is emotion that anyone can latch onto and relate to. Couple that with the slow, almost reverberating beat of the song and you get the masterpiece that is Chronic.

Song 3 - The Valley

The Valley is one of the shortest songs on the album, however that doesn’t stop it from being an emotional punch to the stomach. It’s a song about family, about the pain that family can cause and the ways that it impacts a person. It’s about the excuses that people make for themselves, for their families; how even when you know it is an excuse, you still end up craving it. It’s a song that both minimizes its own pain and allows itself to feel it fully. “And my problems are small / But they’re taller than me”. Two lines that encapsulate an emotion that I cannot name but have felt time and time again; two lines that help drive that punch to the stomach that this song provides. Athan has a way of creating these songs that have a beat to them that doesn’t feel like it matches with the emotionality of the lyrics, and yet it all blends together so well. The Valley is short. But it does so much with its runtime that you forget that it’s a short song.

Song 4 - WhatDoIDo

WhatDoIDo is one of my favorite songs on Side A. It hurts me in a way you might not expect when you listen to it yourself. That’s the beautiful thing about this album; its relatability makes each song hit differently for different people. “Well maybe I don’t know what I need / Maybe I’m running on empty” is a line that hits me square in the chest and pulls thoughts of my current depressive episode. This is different than what it might mean for you, it’s different than what it means for Athan, and yet it still hits all the same. WhatDoIDo is another song with a very heavy beat to it, similar to the reverberation of Chronic. It adds a level of depth to the song that makes it feel like it's dragging you down with it in the best imaginable way. Mix that with Athan’s love of voice modulation and effects that he used in this song and you create something absolutely incredible.

Song 5 - Chameleon

 “I've got about / 50 different hats that I have to wear. / One for my mom, one for my job. / One for my friends, one to survive.” Once again I have to applaud Athan for the relatability of his lyrics. The first time I heard this, I paused the song and stared off into space for a minute before restarting the song and letting it hit me again. Chameleon is a song about fitting in, about finding your place in the world and how hard it can be to be yourself. “Who am I without you around? / Maybe I can blend in somehow.” How well do we really know who we are? So much of a person is influenced by those around them; what happens when all of that goes away? What happens when it’s just you? These questions don’t have answers, but Chameleon asks them anyway and puts a fun beat to it while it rips your heart out. 

Song 6 - Distance

Distance is another song with an incredibly fun rhythm to it that punches you in the face with the lyrics. I boxed to this song recently and it’s perfect for a high energy/fast boxing session but it also has lyrics that break my heart in half. “I’ve been treading water for so long / It feels like I might just give up” – another set of lines that pulls an emotion I have felt for my whole life right out of my brain when I didn’t have the words for it. This is a song that I pick up on a little more each time I listen; different lyrics will stand out, or different ways that the instrumentals hit will pop to the forefront of my listen. One thing that I always think about is how this song feels like a race. You can feel the distance growing and growing as the race is run but you’re so far behind the song. You’re so far behind everyone else, and that’s what the song is trying to do. Athan has managed to space the chorus and verses in a way that it feels anticipatory, like you’re waiting to catch up to what is being said. “The distance it feels like it’s growing / but I will not grow”; the instrumentals perfectly make you feel that line in the pit of your chest, growing and crashing over you before simplifying during the verses as though Athan can’t keep up with the instrumentals themselves. 

Song 7 - Moon

Moon starts out with these lovely and light instrumentals and soft singing that make you feel like it’s a love song until you listen to it. In some ways it is a love song, but the root of the song itself is actually in insecurity, selfishness, and feeling that you aren’t enough for the person you care about. “I’ve been staring at the moon and it feels like / I don’t need you for forever, just for the night / I don’t care if it’s only temporary / I’d rather be happy for a moment of your time” – This section of the song is the chorus and it starts and ends the song as this beautiful mirroring that misses all of the turmoil that lies in between them. There is a point in this song where everything drops and that sense of insecurity and fear and darkness seeps all the way into the lyrics. You may not know this by looking at him, but Athan can scream just as well as any metal artist out there. And you might not expect this song that I described up top to have screaming in it, but it does and it hits so incredibly well. There are a variety of different talents that Athan shows off with this album; screaming just happens to be one. It adds to the depth and darkness of this section before it flips back into the light and lovely chorus that rounds out the song as if that drop never happened at all. It’s a beautiful song that uses its catchy chorus and light beat to lull you into a false sense of security so when everything drops it hits that much harder. 

Song 8 - DNR

This is another one of my favorite songs on Side A. It’s one of my favorite songs on the whole album. The first time I saw the title I thought to myself “DNR as in… Do not resuscitate? Or is this going to stand for something else– Nope! Do not resuscitate, cool cool cool.” This is one of the many songs that made me say “Jesus fucking christ Athan” out loud in my room while listening. And yet these darker tones to the song are part of the reason I love it so much. It’s a song about death that doesn’t feel like it’s about death. Sure, the words “Do not resuscitate me” are kind of blatantly obvious in their being about death; but the instrumentals and beat of the song itself are very fun and punchy. It starts out with these lightly strummed guitar notes that pair perfectly with Athan’s gentle singing and then it grows into something that decides it wants to hurt you in the best way. I also need to be a Classics major on main again and talk about the line “I can feel the coins of gold and silver resting on my eyes” because it’s one of those lines that just constantly sticks in my brain. Athan is ready to pay the ferryman to take him to the Underworld; it’s a nice little reference that makes me so happy I have cast him in a mythology themed podcast.

Song 9 - Break

It’s time to talk about horns! As in the instrument, not as in the thing on animals/demons/etc. You don’t expect them to show up and when they do you’re there like “Hell yeah horns!” Now you may be wondering why I am bringing this up now and all I will say for now is: it’s about the parallelism. But until we get to that part, let’s talk about the lyrics for this song because they do severe emotional damage to me. As I’ve said many times at this point, Athan is absolutely masterful at lyrics and relatability; this song is no exception. This whole album has a tone of parallelism from Side A to Side B, but this song in particular also parallels itself nicely. The first verse serves as a groundwork for the second verse to flip in answering. “Well I think you may have had it right / I’m tired of living in this life” versus “Well I think I may have had it wrong / Maybe I’m right where I belong”; “Mentally, I don’t think I can feel anything” versus “And yet I feel everything”. The way Athan’s lyrics speak to each other always ends up squeezing my heart in ways that are hard to put into words. Which might seem surprising given how long this is. The emotionality of it all feels so real because it is real. Athan has said time and time again that this is a very personal project for him and it bleeds into every second of the music in the best way imaginable. 

Song 10 - Persephone

We’ve reached what might be my favorite song on the album. It’s definitely my favorite song on Side A. This song is slow and soft and dark and beautiful; it is the musical equivalent of the John Everett Millais painting Ophelia. “Lay me down in the flower bed / Let it pull me undertow / I feel the darkness close around me / But I kinda like it though”. Something I haven’t talked about much yet is Athan’s vocals. Not only is he writing absolutely stunning lyrics and putting together these songs with a wide variety of different feels to them, he’s also an incredible vocalist. His vocals on Persephone are part of the reason I love this so much; there’s a point where his voice breaks just the slightest bit and it makes the song feel so much more real and poignant. It squeezes my heart in the best imaginable way. This song also includes a medley of all of the songs on side A which is absolutely stunning. The way the medley allows the different songs to speak to each other and in response to each other creates this beautiful picture of everything that came so far. 

Song 11 -  Diáleimma

We’ve officially reached the end of Side A! This song is the shortest on the album and also one of the most beautiful in my opinion. It represents the transition point between the two sides of this story; from pain and loss and regret into growth and love and recovery. The through line of the song is this idea that “I gotta be a better me”. The song itself is slow, almost reflective in the way it’s presented; it’s as if the song itself is thinking about how it is being perceived and is striving to be better. Diáleimma closes this chapter of the story, turning the page for us as it does so. 

Before we move on to Side B, we’re going to take a brief moment to talk about the album art for Limbo. It was painted by NataliesDreaming, who also happens to be Athan’s wife. Natalie is an incredibly talented artist and has produced an absolutely gorgeous cover for the album. The colors used feel like an extension of the songs themselves, tapping into the hope that grows throughout the album. Natalie’s work also allows you to feel the movement of falling; everything about it is absolutely stunning. This has been the brief intermission to talk about the album art and also to say that Natalie is super cool. Back to the album!

Song 12 - AmIDoingThisRight

Athan opens the second half of the album on an unanswerable question: AmIDoingThisRight? As we discussed previously, this is an album in parallels. If Limbo is about being stuck, AmIDoingThisRight is about trying to get yourself unstuck and the fear that still comes with that. You never know in life if you are doing things right, if the decisions you are making are the ones that you need to make. The bridge of this song lives rent free in my mind: “Cause I don’t think I appreciate everyone in front of me now / And I don’t think I recognize everything that’s detrimental to my health”. The voice modulation Athan does on that part specifically is so fucking good. 

Song 13 - Pocket

Pocket is one of my favorite songs on Side B (You’ll be seeing this phrase a lot coming up because I love so many songs). It’s a song about addiction and relapse which punches into that idea of relatability again. As someone who has struggled with self harm (albeit in a different way than Athan has) this song reached into my heart and pulled me back to my relapse, but in a way that felt healing rather than concerning. It’s a sad song that disguises itself as a soft song but it’s so beautifully done. The chorus makes me feel every emotion under the sun: “I feel so low / I swore that I’d let it go / It’s not a broken promise / I don’t know, I found it in my pocket babe”. This song feels so close to my heart in ways I cannot explain so I won’t try to. I will simply tell you that this song is beautiful and heart-squeezing.

Song 14 - (Good) Goodbye

Athan shared the context of this song and it punched me in the face. This song parallels The Valley and takes that song about family to a more heartbreaking level. One of my favorite lines from this song is “I’m so scared that my last memories / Will be made from my bad days”. Again, it’s about the relatability; that fear is very real, especially when dealing with family while depressed. The pain from Side A still stays in Side B, it just gets grown around and expanded upon to let the hope into it. (Good) Goodbye works very well with this idea; it’s a song that hurts but also leaves room to heal.

Song 15 - Feel It In My Chest

Another one of my favorite songs on Side B! It is the first song on the album to make me cry; if you know me, you know that that is surprising since I cry at most things. “But your soul is destructive / And you’re gonna end up alone” did lasting damage to me personally and I did cry about it. Despite that, this song is hopeful and full of love. It parallels WhatDoIDo and the answer to that question appears to be: you love anyway. “Feel it in my heart / Feel you in my soul / Held you in my hands / The greatest thing to hold”. The first half of the album feels like someone struggling on their own whereas Side B feels like someone learning how to open up and ask for help. Feel It In My Chest feels like opening up despite the fear of it all; the fear of ending up alone doesn’t outweigh the love that can be found with someone. 

Song 16 - Concealer

Concealer is one of my favorite songs on the album. It also punches me in the chest in ways that make me cry. This song parallels Chameleon and both songs are about the masks that people put on. Where Chameleon asks how to be someone without the influence of another person, Concealer asks how much of yourself do you need to hide to get help. “I’m struggling / Under the weight / Well I don’t know how much more I can take. / Could fade into the ether / Or maybe I’ll wear concealer now”. The way Athan sings “I don’t know how much more I can take” haunts me in the best way possible. It’s raw and real and it hurts so incredibly. The instrumentals on this are light and soft so the weight of the lyrics can fully sink into your bones. It’s a beautiful song that makes room around the pain to facilitate growth.

Song 17 - Growing Pains

Growing Pains has sections of whispering which honestly make me uncomfortable but in a good way. It’s partially the misophonia of it all, but it’s also just the pain of it all. It is, as it says, growing pains. It’s the growth that Concealer made room for, the space needed to heal and become more. “Why the fuck am I comparing / All the lights in the distance to yours? / You’re all I need” – Remember how I mentioned the idea of Side B being about learning how to ask for help? This song helps to dig into that idea; it’s a form of growing. The instrumentals of this song are light and airy and a little spacey; I’m fully obsessed with them. 

Song 18 - Inside

The parallelism between Moon and Inside is some of my favorites. Moon is a sad song disguised as a love song; Inside is a love song disguised as a sad song. “Well maybe it’s supposed to hurt / This love it feels like work / But fuck it I know; it’s worth it to grow / Into the dirt”. This song is enhanced by the fact that Natalie (the aforementioned artist and also Athan’s wife) is also featured on the track. Athan has said that this is the first duet they’ve recorded together and it’s absolutely gorgeous. Their voices compliment each other so nicely and Natalie has a lovely singing voice. You can feel the love that they have for each other in the song, even in the sadder lyrics of it all. This brings me back to the parallelism: Moon is about something temporary, something that is thought not to last. Inside is about someone who has stayed, someone who will stay and will help and will always be there. It brings the hope back into this story because it proves that people stay. That help can be given. 

Song 19 - Motionsick

This song has a lot of religious symbolism that I fully missed until Athan mentioned that it had religious symbolism. And once I had that context, all of the plays on words and phrases were just. So incredibly well done. “Why don’t I know you / Why don’t I know you anymore? / Why, why, try? / I fight this devotion Feels like I’m motion sick” – You might look at that and go “Pine, that’s pretty obvious isn’t it?” To which I say yes, it is, I just missed it because me and religion haven’t exactly gotten on very well. This also has a parallel I love with it’s Side A counterpart DNR: “I’m throwing punches / Battle what’s inside of me” in DNR which becomes “I’m boxing with my shadow but I keep on landing punches / It seems I like to bruise” and this does things to my brain that I cannot stop feeling. 

Song 20 - Bend

And we have reached the other contender for my favorite song on the album! This is my favorite song on Side B for sure, but I cannot figure out if Bend or Persephone is my favorite. Bend is such a hopeful song; it’s bright and beautiful and we’re back to the horns! Athan played the horns for Bend and they are always always in my mind. He didn’t play the horns on Break (this song’s counterpart) but that’s okay because he has played the brighter version of the horns and I’m obsessed with them. This song rounds out that idea of learning to ask for help even when– or perhaps especially when– it’s difficult. “Opening up doesn’t come easy for me / For me now / But I gotta learn how / Cause I don’t think I can help myself up tonight” – a line that perfectly encapsulates that idea. Part of the reason this song ends up feeling as bright and hopeful as it does is because it tells you that when you ask for help it will be given– “Oh, I know that it might have been a bad fall / But you’ll be there to catch me at the bottom after all”. This song has only been in my life for a week but it has made a home in my heart that it is never going to leave. It means so much to me already and it’s absolutely gorgeous. 

Song 21 - ESC

ESC has a very space-y vibe that feels like it is built for escape. The entire song feels like it is floating and then the lyrics pull you back down to earth again. It’s one of the shorter songs on the album, but it has a gentle beauty to it that leaves it lingering in my mind. “And I’ll fall / Down in insecurities/ I; I’m buried in shit surrounding me” is another one of those lines that really does things to me as someone who has been depressed for most of my life. That’s one of the most beautiful things about Athan’s music: short, beautiful lines that can make anyone feel connected to them.

Song 22 - Telos

And we return to the line introduced at the end of Side A: “I gotta be a better me”. Where in Diáleimma it feels like a judgement, like an impossible command, in Telos it feels like it’s something that is just around the corner, almost within grasp. Telos is bright and full of life as opposed to the darkness of Diáleimma. They compliment each other so well– as was Athan’s design. It also includes another medley of things from the entire album and it’s incredibly fun. It’s the perfect way to round out the main portion of the album– it closes the story and feels like a celebration of the whole album. And it’s an album very much worth celebrating.

Song 23 - Chronic (Piano Version)

You get a brief reprieve from my ridiculous amount of words since this one is a piano cover. It’s a very beautiful version of the song though.

Song 24 - Intertwined (Acoustic) 

This is an acoustic version of one of Athan’s older songs. It has beautiful instrumentals and lyrics that feel like they grew into some of the songs that are on the album as a whole. Athan didn’t put the lyrics on Bandcamp so I can’t pull examples for you but trust me they’re good.

Song 25 - Chronic (House Version)

There’s not much that I can say about this version that I hadn’t said about Chronic originally. But it is a fun additional version!

Song 26 - Hallelujah (feat. The Grotto)

This is one of my favorite versions of Hallelujah that I have ever heard in my life. The style is different from the other songs on the album, but fits perfectly into the music that Athan did for his podcast The Grotto. The Grotto is a liminal horror podcast about grief and it is absolutely incredible. The reason that this song is listed as ‘feat. The Grotto’ is partially because it’s Athan using that style of music but also because he included some of his screams from The Grotto in it. Don’t look too closely at why he was screaming. It’s not important. But this version of the song– because of the style that it’s done in– feels so unique and has a depth to it that can only be achieved in this medium. Athan had originally released it for The Grotto patreon and I listened to it after a bit of an emotional breakdown. It is as close to a religious experience as I am capable of experiencing. Hallelujah is the only cover Athan has on Limbo– he does more covers for The Grotto which are also excellent. Of all of the covers that he could’ve included, this one feels like the perfect fit. It mixes with the content of the songs Athan has written so well and showcases another style that he is able to pull off.

Song 27 - Bend (Acoustic)

Athan called it the acoustic version but I think of it as the silly version. There is a levity to the song that is palpable– it feels like a test run of the song but in the best way possible. It also gives a bit of insight into what the process of creation was like for Athan. In the original version of Bend, there is the line “I don’t think I will reach thirty if I’m lucky now”; the acoustic version follows up with Athan laughing at the fact that he’s much closer to 30 than he was when he wrote that. “I’m so glad to be alive”, a small little bit of this version but such a big change from the original words that were written. If you couldn’t tell by the amount of words I’ve put into this, I’m also glad Athan is alive. He’s written absolutely incredible music that he has shared with the world despite (or perhaps because of) the intense emotional weight of the content. 

Limbo is an album that longs. It grieves. But it also hopes. It hopes so much and shows that healing and recovery are possible. Athan spent three years working on Limbo and now it’s here; it exists in the world to be listened to and shared and written about and loved. This album has so much heart to it. The lyrics are beautiful, the instrumentals brilliantly crafted, and the vocals are stunning. It is an album that deserves to be spoken about in depth. It’s an album that deserves your time and attention. As far as debut albums go, this album showcases so much of what Athan can do while still leaving room for growth and new ways for him to surprise and delight anyone who is listening to his music. It also punches directly into the heart in the most amazing way, letting you know exactly what he can do with music moving forward. I feel very fortunate to be able to listen to this album and to know that I will be following along with whatever else Athan will be doing next. I’m also fortunate enough to get to collaborate with Athan on projects– he’ll be in my next podcast and I will also be paying him to do music for the show. Getting to work with someone so talented is a wild feeling, but I’m so excited for it. 

Thank you for joining me on this very long, very in depth review of Limbo. I hope you’ve enjoyed it and I hope you enjoy the album!

[naavispider]

Hope this isn’t too random, but a super fluffy idea popped into my head recently and I thought you’d like it:

Remember how in “If you playin me”, Spider likes to play old music on his Ukulele? (or was it a guitar?)

What if he started playing a song that he only knows the notes for, but it happens to be one of Quaritch’s favorite songs, so he starts humming, then hesitantly signing the lyrics, all while Spider can’t believe his ears.

I thought of this while hearing the song “I Walk the Line”, since it gave me Quaritch vibes, but there are a lot of songs that could work.

Anyways, sorry again if this is random, but your fics literally live rent free in my head!

Hey! I am so sorry it's taken me so long to reply! You're right it was a ukulele! 💞 I'd not listened to this song before, but now I have and I love it!

Spider strummed the first chord experimentally, listening to the sound thoughtfully before figuring out a strumming pattern that fit. He had a song in mind, but he hadn't played it in years. He could barely remember the words, but the plucking pattern was so distinctive that once the melody had reoccurred in his mind, he couldn't get it out of his head. He experimented plucking until he found the right sound, and began to hum the tune softly.

He was in a secluded spot near the clearing, passing the time while the rest of the squad cooked the yerik that they'd caught earlier that day. He wasn't supposed to go beyond the treeline, but Spider figured Quaritch wouldn't be too pressed that he'd strayed a little further than normal. He just wanted some privacy.

So it was with a gasp that he spun around at the sound of Quaritch's voice behind him. Immediately he stopped playing, begging his human skin not to flush with embarassment. He hated being snuck up upon.

"Why d'you stop?" Quaritch chuckled softly, eyeing him with what Spider assumed was a patronising glance.

Spider huffed. "Some jackass interrupted me." He turned back around on his fallen tree trunk, showing the Colonel his back and hoping he'd take the hint.

He waited, expecting Quaritch to make a snarky retort and head back to the fire, but there was no sound of movement. Annoyed, he turned back around. "What?"

Quaritch had taken a seat on a different log, with an expectant look on his face. "I'm waiting for you to continue," he said.

Spider laughed sarcastically. "Yeah. Okay. Wait all night then."

"Did you forget the words?" Quaritch asked.

Spider was so disarmed by the question, it took him a moment to form a response. "What? No." What was the guy's problem? Spider just wanted to be left alone.

What happened next was so unexpected that Spider didn't quite know how to feel about it. Quaritch spoke the words that Spider had been searching for ever since the damn melody swam its way back from his memory.

"I keep a close watch on this heart of mine, I keep my eyes wide open all the time I keep the ends out for the tie that binds Because you're mine, I walk the line..."

Spider was shocked. "How do you know that?"

Quaritch laughed. "Am I not allowed to enjoy music? Johnny Cash was a great artist."

Spider threw him a look of utter annoyance. He'd always liked this song. He wasn't sure when he first heard it, but it was wayyy back in his childhood. The fact that Quaritch also liked it? That wasn't fair.

He sniffed. "It's pretty boring, actually."

"Is that why you've been trying to play it for the past hour?"

Spider sighed, bringing a hand up to run it through his hair. The man was too much. "Will you leave me alone or not?" The sounds of the recoms chatting shit around the fire and laughing at Mansk's new roasting suggestions beckoned them both to return.

"Sure, kid," Quaritch rumbled, though not before pausing for a moment to ruffle Spider's hair, successfully displacing the locs he'd just tried to smooth down.

Spider let his scowl reply for him, biting back a retort as Quaritch left him to it, traipsing back through the undergrowth to the centre of camp. He waited until he was definitely back out of earshot before returning to the ukulele.

"I keep a close watch on this heart of mine..."

[corneliaavenue-ao3]

Several Sunlight Daylights: a week-long tribute to Hinny through the power of Taylor Swift. There is a new prompt everyday starting on Taylor's birthday! The title of this celebration is taken from the "several sunlit days" that Harry kissed Ginny, and the song Daylight by Taylor!

Tag your works with #SeveralSunlitDaylights and tag me @GinWiz to help share your work!

December 13: Red. The color of Ginny's hair and the title of one of Taylor's best albums. Be inspired by any of the songs off of Red the album or a lyric that includes the word "red."

December 14: Based off a Bridge. Taylor Civil Engineer Swift is a master of bridges. Create something based off of a bridge! Songs with some great bridges recommendations: Cruel Summer, Death By A Thousand Cuts, Daylight, Dress, King of My Heart, Champagne Problems, Out of the Woods, Getaway Car, Hits Different

December 15: Folklore/Evermore. In 2020, Taylor released two albums that were based off of fictional stories. Let the fictional world of a teenage love triangle, murder of an abusive husband, a wild neighbor, a broken engagement, and many other storylines inspire you.

December 16: Featuring. Taylor has recorded a variety of tracks with many famous artists from Kendrick Lamar to Phoebe Bridgers. Be inspired by a song with a feature (or a song she is featured in!) Bonus points if you feature a suprise character in your work as well.

December 17: In the middle of the night. A recurring theme in Taylor’s music is being haunted by things in the middle of the night, specifically 2 AM, and, most recently, Midnights. Be inspired by the album Midnights or a lyric about night time.

December 18: Lyric as dialogue. Use Taylor Swift lyrics as part of your dialogue. Some lyrics to be inspired by:

"I once believed love would be burning red, but its golden like daylight."

“You kept me like a secret, but I kept you like an oath”

"Back when I was living for the hope of it all"

“You taught me about your past, thinking your future was me”

“Give me back my girlhood, it was mine first”

“I don’t like that falling feels like flying, til the bone crush”

“I love you, ain’t that the worst thing you’ve ever heard?”

“I’m a mess, but the mess that you wanted”

“All these people think loves for show, but I would die for you in secret”

“Is this the end of all the endings?”

“For once you let go of your fears and your ghosts”

“One night he wakes, strange look on his face, pauses then says “You’re my best friend”

“Please don’t ever become a stranger whose laugh I could recognize anywhere”

December 19: Your favorite Taylor Swift song. Write a story based off of your personal favorite Taylor Swift song!

Thank you all to everyone who suggested prompts. I am so excited for this event to get started! Let me know if you have any questions.

[saintetheldreda]

so in new perspective noah kahan sings

"oh, this town's for the record now

the intersection's got a target, and theyre calling it downtown"

read something in a book yesterday that made me think of this lyric did you know target is actually notoriously one of the business that is the most closely tied to working with law enforcement via surveillance data from people's credit card purchases. its something really unique and unusual about it. according to my book the vice president of target nathan garvis has proudly declared he realised tracking criminals "was really an inventory-management problem." oof!!! it donates loads of data to government databases, makes ties between its employees and law enforcement agencies, provides money to prosecutors, owns one of america's top forensic labs. which is a really really frightening manifestation of surveillance capitalism - a retailer allied with government, capitalism allied with control

and idk man not saying this was intentional cause noah probably just wanted a rhyme with "closet" lol but reading it made me so sad. and immediately scribble "this town's for the record now" in the margins cause like. imagine youre the guy from stick season you try to run away from the world cause the thing you fear most is being seen only to find out theres not really a place for individuality in this world anymore. whoever you are when youre on your own and no one is watching is not really wanted. no matter where you go, youre always performing, youre always held up to standards that are not your own, youre never just you

not to take the side of the character in this song completely cause obviously the song in a lot of ways is about how problematic his attitude is to things, cause hes shutting off from the world, but like. i also feel so sad for him cause you look around at the world and you can really understand why he did it. and i wish we lived in a world that didnt make people feel that way

and i love new perspective so much cause its both a beautifully personal song and also something that really captures the mood of current times. an internet age where were looking around a world where local community ties are eroded more and more and were all just funneled into the same spotlight. the same ideals the same standards the same toxic paradigms the same perspective. we dont look at each other through each others eyes anymore, its just through the same harsh camera lens of cctv or surveillance or social media or whatever. and we cant remember who we are anymore, we forget how to be individuals

its like in no complaints, this target surveillance capitalism really speaks to what it is to trade personal selfhood away in the name of safety - "i filled the hole in my head with prescription medication then forgot who to cry, who am i, who am i to complain?"

(notice the repetition of "who am i" - he forgets to ask the question that is really important to him, "who am i," halfway through asking it, cause he gets distracted by a culture that capitalises on fear pressing you to ask "am i safe? am i safe? am i safe?" to control you; to sell you home security systems and bogus diet plans and health scares or forward policies to collect your credit card data to erode your freedoms)

[tarot-by-e11e]

Hello!!! Elle✨

I am here to participate in your Intuitive game activity.

My initials - SHEY

My Favorite song(current fav) and Why -

"Patience" by Tame Impala

Its dreamy🫧music🎶 and thoughtful💭 lyrics📃 capture📸 the feeling🦋 of waiting⏳ and being patient🤌🏻creating🎨🖌️ a calming🌸 and reflective🪞 atmosphere🌿

My question - I'd love to get a general reading from you. Just whatever comes to your mind.

Hi SHEY,

Thank you so much for patiently waiting for your turn in my ask game.

I do apologize I wasn't able to include your name last night, it was a technical issue on my end. Don't worry, I added you back into the list and officially closed the game.

So starting with your song, the songs sound so chill and relaxing and when I check the lyrics seems dreamy and sort of sad.

Now for your general reading, the question that comes to mind is, "What do SHEY's guides want to tell SHEY?" They requested to do this in channeled messages format.

I'll list it down in bullet form for easier read:

"Is SHEY just being curious or does SHEY really want to know what we have to tell her?"

"Should we tell her about that time SHEY felt so embarrassed in public but really, no one even noticed or remembered?"

"SHEY's really hard on herself on things that she chose be burdened with. It's not SHEY's issue nor is it SHEY's problem to solve, yet why is she overextending herself for people who don't value and respect her?"

"Come on, I know this is a general reading, but we're (your spirit guides) are practically just rambling here?? There's no telling when will we ever get to chance to speak up again."

"Then tell SHEY she's being an idiot for forcing herself to fit into other people's molds and expectations are her."

"Yoooooo calm down, you might scare SHEY away. Let's be nicer about this, shall we?"

"Okay, SHEY needs a wake-up call for her perfectionistic procrastinating self-sabotaging tendencies. She knows she's capable of anything, yet her unrealistic standards for herself, makes her resentful for her ideals and her current ability."

"Seriously, what part of "be nice do all of you (your spirit guides) not realize?! Keep it nice and sweet."

"Okay, she's so sweet, loving, and secretly caring that her kindness is mistaken for weakness. That's why SHEY's become a chronic people pleaser."

"What the flipping duck do you all (your spirit guides) not know about the simple meaning of being *nice*?!"

(the rest of your spirit guides) "Well.... we didn't use swear words... So that's nice..."

(the actually nice spirit guide flips a table) "Universe?! Why did you assign with thissss *looks at the rest of your spirit guides as if they were vermins*"

"Hehe, the strict one lost its cool!! Anyway SHEY, stop guilt tripping yourself for things not being in your control. So as much as you want to save someone from the consequences of their own stupidity, you can't. They did need to learn their lessons and they need a good old fashion psychic backhanded bissh slap towards the brick wall, for thinking they can get away with harming and abusing you."

*nods spiritual heads in unison* "SHEY needs to stop being a push over!!" *the rest of your guides* "YEAH!!!!!!!!!!!"

"SHEY needs to do more self-care, that's beyond skincare" "oooohhh that's a good one".

"What else? oh! Don't give the so-called nice guy reformed player a chance.(this is future instance)"

"Is there anything else?" "Nope we all said what we need to say"

SHEY... your guides... they're wild and loud and cut throat.

Having to channel for all of them is giving a massive headache.

I'm sorry this is as far as I can pull for you.

Do let me know in your feedback how this resonates with you

[elysiuminfra]

GOOD MORNING ANON thank u for this question :] i love talking about being a hater btw sorry not answering your ask directly i tried and tumblr wouldnt let me :( just kidding im not actually as big of a hater as i say i am. when i talk about the musical - im not talking about any recordings, im talking about the ORIGINAL album. because i havent actually been able to find good quality recordings of the musical. :( and. well. warlow's jekyll is my favorite jekyll hands down now onto thoughts. i think the musical is fine, i like to listen to it sometimes even. some of my favorite jekyll and hyde stuff people have made are musical animatics (which go hard.) and im fond of the actors who have played jekyll/hyde, i just think the've done excellent with casting for the musical over the years. HOWEVER. i have opinions. many of these are based on my own personal tastes, some of them are actual criticisms - all of them are subjective. dont let me dash any reader's enjoyment of it on the rocks. i dont think its a "good" adaptation of the original story. it sort of.... misses the point? of the. everything? it treats jekyll and hyde as separate, with hyde being "pure evil" and jekyll being. well. good. there's not a lot of nuance to it. it IS from jekyll's perspective, and jekyll is an unreliable narrator (one of the MOST unreliable) but i just dislike how it handles hyde's entire deal. because even with jekyll being an unreliable narrator, it still doesn't give any other nuance other than hyde is entirely separate and entirely evil and the source of all of jekyll's woes (not the point - its not OBVIOUS in the book, but it can be easily gleaned through jekyll's breakdown). not only that but the weird and unnecessary inclusion of violence against women and painting hyde (and by extension, jekyll) as a sexual predator. i don't think that's necessarily TERRIBLE WRITING, as. well i believe jekyll does have a lot of issues surrounding sex but i, personally, cannot see jekyll/hyde as a sex pest in the way the musical sees it. he's an effective villain for sure. i just wish it...... handled it better. i just can't see jekyll like that, not even in the original book. i also think the inclusion of not 1 but 2 female romantic interests kind of.... takes away from the original point, i think. what i liked about j&h proper is that it really is about jekyll's relationships with the other men in his life - particularly utterson and lanyon, and in the background poole and jekyll's unnamed father - and how his own issues and problems cause him to navigate those relationships (as well as him reinforcing toxic masculine standards) BUT THATS NOT THE STORY THEYRE TRYING TO TELL. which is fine!!! it's a story about jekyll, and how good his life was before he destroys it. i just don't like that they used misogynistic writing to tell that story. i wish the women in the musical were given far more depth than "jekyll's love interest" and "weary prostitute that hyde stalks", and that they had more.... substance. outside of jekyll/hyde. this isnt uncommon, and particularly not uncommon for musicals / media of this genre. women are just not given as much substance compared to the male leads. and its SAD :( another thing is the.... music. not the score itself - the orchestra is not particularly striking compared to some other musical soundtracks i listen to, however they do reuse motifs throughout the musical - and its exciting to pick that out! there are certain series of notes associated with jekyll/hyde. and i think thats cool because i love motifs. lyrically, i think it's lacking. i think it could have been far, far more interesting lyrics wise but im not sure why they didn't push for it? there's a lot of other musicals (frankenstein, for one) i can think of that are, musically, very stylistically similar but LYRICALLY far superior. i like that it takes a lot from the book, but the way it uses it... leaves something to be desired. the melodies are pretty good in some songs, though, ill give them that. i also dont like the idea of hyde as a crazed serial killer. the death of carew in the book was poignant. i think, it was jekyll's (hyde's, technically) first murder. i also dont think hyde (and by extension, jekyll) WOULD go on a crazed killing spree just for. whatever reason. i just don't really see it happening, but that's because the musical- once again- treats hyde as separate and fully evil and not part of jekyll. when i think of hyde - i think of, what would jekyll do if given the chance? serial killing is not one of those options for me. but the musical doesnt handle jekyll/hyde that way - all of it points towards jekyll not being in control, and not WANTING these things, but hyde, being SEPARATE, doing them anyway. because if.... if it didn't, it would paint jekyll as a very, very, very bad person. someone who 1. is willing to cheat on his fiance with a prostitute, 2. willing to HURT those he is sexually attracted to out of selfish desire when he's rejected 3. a potentially extremely abusive husband. i don't think this was the intention. i really don't. but if you put the musical through that lense, of jekyll/hyde being the same guy, well...... yeah i just dont think thats what they were going with. so i dont think, in the musical, they're portrayed as the same guy. which is not a kind of adaptation i like or prefer. to wind down, i think it's lacking. a bit... boring and somewhat tasteless. i think it couldve been much, much more. i think the lyrics could've been better, i think the writing could've been WAY better, i don't think, overall, it's a good "adaptation", or even a good retelling. i think it's misogynistic. i think it completely misses the point of the original book. i don't think it's even a "great" musical by musical standards. it's more.... just... lukewarm. i suppose. not "terrible" just not. good. BUT i do like some of the tracks, and i DO LOVE that UTTERSON is a big part of it! he's typically ignored in a lot of adaptations. i do love the dedication that theater groups bring to the musical (there's a recording of the russian version with an INSANE SET!!) - and i do love the actors that have portrayed these characters over the decades. i just wish the musical was..... i wish it understood the original message more. and wasn't obsessed with torturing women. and was actually good. and didnt suck. long story short. its not good. there's some qualities i like. but overall i think it sucks mad cheese. the end

[sidesteppostinghours]

9 and 25 for all of them !! :)

evening gideon!! thank you for the ask :]

9. Do you have a specific lyric or quote which you associate with your OC?

ok. so. the thing about me is that i dont actually listen to music all that often??? its mostly when i draw digitally, and im primarily a traditional artist so i dont really know that many songs. i also have shitty memory so its hard for me to remember quotes. aka this is a pretty hard question for me to answer, but i will try my best:

Caine-"Oh, captain, make up your mind/Before the salt burns your eyes and you run out of time/'Cause you're popping the cork, you get lost in your brain/And you lose touch with all the things that made you feel sane" - Ship in a Bottle (fin)

honestly ive never really associated this song with him before but i looked into the lyrics just to see whether it had anything i could think of them with and theres??? actually a bunch of lyrics there that fit???? like to the point i was struggling to decide which one to use for this. but i think this one, the second chorus, really encapsulates the biggest parts of their character. hes the decision maker out of all my steps, the one that knows how to make the logical choices and think his way out of a problem. but hes on a time limit. he doesn't know when it will end, just that it will at some point, and they cant stop if they want everything done in time. also sight and eyes is something i associate caine with a lot, especially closing your eyes/refusing to see. "you get lost in your brain/and you lose touch with all the things that made you feel sane." COUGHS. coughs. caine has the most gates open out of all my steps. i also fully intend to make them the source of hb 2.0. yeah.

Cyrus- HE WAS THE ONLY ONE I THOUGHT OF AN ANSWER FOR STRAIGHT AWAY AND I SPRINTED TO HIS TAG JUST TO FIND THE POST

look him in the eyes and say this to his face. he will look like he got hit by a freight train.

Cecilia- another quote!

im just gonna go ahead and put my own tags to this one because thats where i put it best:

#thinking about this again with ceci#the best part is the bullet hole#like yeah shes not ready to face the fact that everything shes been doing up till now#was just to distract herself from the absolute misery life became after heartbreak#she has FRIENDS she has people she CARES about and they even seem to like her back!!!!#she even has a girlfriend!#isnt that enough?#tell her thats enough#cecilia rider

theres a reason shes a thrill seeker yall.

Cynthia- "I swear, I'm so fucking sorry/I'm not a good person, I'm barely a person at all/But someday I'll be perfect, and I'll make up for it all" - Against the Kitchen Floor (Will Wood)

uh. *looks at cynthias relationship with ortega* uhhhh. *looks at cynthias relationship with sidestep*. uhhhhhhhh.

this song was also difficult to choose lyrics out of, but there is just something so special about girls who simply have to be the best they can to make up for the sin of being. there is something equally as special about girls who take their past selves as judge, and their lover as executioner. also "im not a good person, im barely a person at all" kills me. the regene flavouring on that line??? utterly insane of mr wood to make a song just for her.

25. What is your favorite thing about your OC?

THESE BITCHES ARE SO CONTRADICTORY!!! THERE IS ALWAYS SOMETHING CLASHING ABOUT THESE FUCKERS AND ITS DELICIOUS. not even just trait wise, but with their themes? their core ideals? their relationships???? its always some sort of fucking fundamental difference shaping the way they act and i am Obsessed with it. also all of them are dangerous and it makes me vibrate a little bit. rangers you are so lucky that none of them are interested in leaning into being a full blown villain. but this question is,,, also difficult to answer because idk how to pick just one favourite lmfao. i will attempt it though.

Caine- he is the normalest guy around. there is also something Deeply Wrong with him. my favourite thing about caine would probably be how fun it is to dive into his psyche! ill often have times where i get bored of them and wonder why i got so interested in the first place, and then i get hit with another round of it and i remember "oh right! its because hes insane." his whole character revolves around what is going on inside their brain, from their high subterfuge to their connection with heartbreak and his relationship with the puppet. theyre the most fun to play with in their mind.

Cyrus- god. my favourite thing about him is a tie between his stubbornness and his surprisingly strong sense of empathy. both of those were the things keeping him from becoming a villain in the first place, and now its whats stopping him from going back to being a hero. i want him to confront what hes become so bad yall dont understand-

Cecilia- cecilia is just. a breath of fresh air. shes easy and super fun to play, and while she certainly has her moments (i am looking directly at the checkpoint three mortum reveal scene), shes mostly lighthearted fun cruising through the game as nothing more than a silly guy. i think the next game will actually dig into her character more deeply and allow me to showcase the parts of her shed usually keep hidden, but for now im having a good time getting her to kiss argent and embarrass her friends.

Cynthia- somebody come pick her up please before she starts crying in this club. she is crying because of me but lets not talk about that. i think my favourite thing about her is the contrast between her general wimpy sad lovergirl disposition and her revenge scar, and how she chooses to cope with it! because like,,,, it is just so so tasty watching her fumble with the overwhelming emotion, Especially since the emotion is hurting people. she never learned what to do with the anger! she does not want it! she wants to be as kind to other people as possible! "im not a bad dog, i dont know why i bite" etc etc. eventually she might figure it out, but Definitely Not Now lmfao.

questions from here!

[skinnedbutalive]

A month or so ago i hosted a small event for my audience: i asked people to send me my oc's names to know a random fact about them. Straight up questions were also appreciated, but it was not strictly required :) Here is what came of it:

This one was an announcement picture to get audiences attention to the event. Hand: So, are you ready to answer questions? Nadan: It's almost like giving an interview, no big deal. Alvi: i guess.

I once told a tiny frivolous fact about Hand hating blue socks, so one user asked the character why, and added, that if Hand won't answer, they'll address it to Alvi :D Hand: don't you da- Alvi: when he was a child he had a nightma- Hand: SHUT UP! Alvi: -about blue socks biting his feet o- Hand: NOT ANOTHER WORD YOU DIRTY TRAITOR!

Erist: In the past i was afraid to go outside. Be it night or day it was all the same, because it wasn't the Darkness that i feared. It was the thought, that they'll see me and figure out I survived, that gave me chills.

Rint: it's not that i avoid mirrors, but every time i spot my reflection i see my father. This makes me feel... strange. I try not to think about it.

Vasdemar: i couldn't come up with my signature for quite a long time. I wanted something awesome, calligraphic, with hooks and loops. But after ten times i got lazy so it transformed into a simpler one.

(Nemeska and her dream to catch a huge fish :D)

Elmir: Me? You really want to know something about me?? Give me a minute, it's so unexpected. Hmm... I... can't perceive myself separately from my flickerist. It guess you can say Rint and I are the same person, but i am, obviously, his best and smartest part. Although he forgets about it all the time.

Oftentimes I like to observe the life around me. To sit by a crowded street and feel the winds breeze, to listen to footsteps falling on metal, to see faces, smiles, to hear wisps of conversations. To behold. In these times my body...is an obstacle.

Brin: i've been taking antipsychotics since i turned ten. Tastes like shit.

Lugar: andrederas, coleuses, clivias, ferns, succulents. I know unnecessary amount about houseplants, nearly as much about ornamental plants, and a bit about wild ones. It's the most pointless knowledge i have. Can't stand them.

Erist: over the entire history of its existence humanity came up with many fascinating things. Music is the most to my liking. Motley, groovy, lyrical, dance music, folk music, classic music. It gives me melancholy not being able to enjoy it in my current circumstances.

(At the end I'd like to note i found out my twi didn't allow strangers to dm me. The problem is - hopefully - fixed now, so please try again if i didn't answer you! I probably didn't even see your message. So sorry for that, I'm an awful twitter user :'3)

[carewyncromwell]

Well, we’ve finally graduated from Hogwarts. And it only took us a little over five years. (If it actually took seven years, then Jam City would have a cruel sense of humor.) Now I have to ask, is there a special song that Carewyn would sing for her class’ graduation? (For me, I find “We've got it all” by Kenny Rogers to be very fitting.)

Aww, what a wholesome question!! Graduation tunes!! ^.^

The tune you suggested is very sweet and the lyrics really do suit this kind of bittersweet occasion!

It's hard to say goodbye -- You're much more than a friend. When good times become memories, They never really end.

The only problem is Carewyn wouldn't have had the opportunity to hear it in time for her graduation, since the only information I've found about this song when looking into its release date is that it was featured in the finale of the American TV sitcom Home Improvement in 1999, a good eight years after Carewyn's graduation in the spring of 1991. (Sadly, in the UK, I don't think the show even aired until much later, and I don't know if it finished its run.) Even so, it kind of reminds me of the song I almost sang at my graduation with three of my other classmates and I'll eternally be a little disappointed we weren't able to perform, "There You'll Be" by Faith Hill:

In my dreams, I'll always see you soar above the sky -- In my heart, there'll always be a place for you for all my life -- I'll keep a part of you with me, And everywhere I am, there you'll be...

As for Carewyn...I actually think it'd be really, really sweet if she chose "(I've Had) The Time of My Life" by Bill Medley and Jennifer Warnes! Yes, it's a love song, but the time period is just right, the vibe is so 80's, and I honestly think Carewyn would be more feeling celebratory about graduation as opposed to bittersweet, given how much she'll look forward to being a lawyer for the Ministry and making a stamp on the world as something other than a Cursebreaker. Plus she loves her friends in the Circle of Khanna so much, and she'd want them to both know how much she cherishes them and make them look ahead with excitement, not trepidation.

I've had the time of my life -- No, I never felt this way before! Yes, I swear -- it's the truth, And I owe it all to you!

Even though Carewyn loves to sing with her brother Jacob and he ends up graduating the same year as her, though, I actually love the idea of Carewyn singing with her buddy Barnaby for this instead, as a salute to both the Celestina Warbeck quest and the strong friendships Carewyn forged at school specifically. I could imagine Jacob singing as loudly as he could from the audience, though -- he would be so proud of his precious Pippa! X3💚