#the loyalty go hard

[xstarlightxstarbrightx]

adventuring rambles #1

HAHAHA I TOTALLY DIDN'T KEEL OVER BECAUSE OF SICKNESS, FINALS, AND GENERALLY JUST PERISHING LMAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO NOT AT ALL anyway, so i'm currently deep in the brain rot (i have been the entire time gone, u think this shit goes away? no, no it doesn't, i live here now) and i was thinkin abt like, yk, how time works in Teyvat. cuz like me personally i didn't start playing till after Sumeru (and my acc is as old as Inazuma release but i didnt play cuz reasons), but every nation is updated like what, every year or so? so, therefore, at least in my opinion (and thus my h/c's b/c SUE ME) the traveler is in each nation for about a year. which means Lumi's in Mondstadt for a year after the Dvalin thing, doing generally good deeds and getting commissions and figuring out how Mora and stuff works (bc this IS a new world for her, girl doesn't know EVERYTHING yet) so there's a year of her helping out around Mondstadt, working w/ Kaeya and essentially doing team building b/c he's gonna be traveling w/ her when the Rite of Descension finally comes around, wringing Paimon for information on everything she can (girl is feral for info on Teyvat), all that jazz. which makes sense; the Traveler comes to be Very Well Known TM and while fighting a dragon is cool i doubt that's the ONLY reason she gets to be well known, right?

anyway, this massive prelude is just me yapping abt how they totally go to Dragonspine nearer the end of the year to do stuff. and the only reason they CAN go to Dragonspine is b/c they meet Bennett (who Lumi immediately wants to adopt b/c HE'S A BABY), and Benny offers to take 'em up there. :) so,,, i like to imagine that when they're up in Dragonspine, doing everything that has to do w/ that place, a silly thing happens where Lumi and Kaeya kinda get separated from Bennett and like,,, trapped in a place and almost get murdered by a Frostarm Lawlachurl (i have horrible trauma w/ that one fucker by the goddamn crimson tree. he may be dead but i will never forget the fear). anyway, so Kaeya literally almost dies, and it culminates w/ Lumi almost dying to sheer cold to get him to a waypoint, and then her refusing to leave him while he's getting patched up b/c uh oh abandonment issues! (dw abt Bennett and Paimon btw, they made it back to Mondstadt to try and get help; tho tbf that was also an arduous journey in of itself)

now, u must be asking; why did i come up w/ this idea?

b/c it was the best way to express the general Dragonspine experience, and also bc i CAN. totally didn't also write a love confession afterwards, no not at all, i'm not a psychopath

after this, Lumi never goes to Dragonspine w/o AT LEAST 15 warming bottles. and after she finds out abt portable waypoints, u know for a FACT she carries 5 on her at All Times. also Kaeya would never admit it but he gets a little stressed around Frostarm Lawlachurls now.

anyway i WILL Return TM w/ the silly goofy Liyue chapter (at least everything i can FUCKIN REMEMBER BRO (tho i DID take notes when my friend redid it so!! :)c))

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Hanguang-Jumpkick

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[ancha-aus]

RealAgeAu Drabble - The Roots

I have been gone for a few days but i wanted to really mess with this tiny concept!

First Drabble (with special thanks to @spotaus For giving the first prompt) Prev Drabble Next Drabble

Technically timeline wise this is at the same ish time as the next drabble in the timeline, On the Other side. But we will just do this like this for now :D

As always, we have no beta and no edits. :D Also slight warning, I will be changing up the POVs in the drabble itself a bit. don't worry about it.

*---------------*

Nightmare looks around the corner and notices that all four are still asleep. That is good. Perfect even!

It isn't that he dislikes being with them. The oposite in matter of fact. it feels... Safe protected home calming nice. Many things but overal just nice.

It still confuses him sometimes. That they just... care. After everything. Even with them knowing just who he is.

It also does mean that Nightmare feels bad about leaving while they are asleep.

It is just that he isn't going to get another chance like this. They are very close to DreamTale and with how much magic Nightmare has in him now thanks to the many meals and sleeping a lot, he thinks he could make it all the way to DreamTale and back before being completely out of magic to use.

Which means he has his chance to do a small personal ritual he hasn't had the chance to do in a while.

It is something stupid. And Nightmare knows he should stop it.

It is just... After everything in Dreamtale happened. The deal with what he had caused and done, having been the cause of both his brother and mother dying... He had just made two graves.

He had been the point of returning there once in a while to maintain both graves and leave fresh flowers.

Nightmare just. Never stopped doing it. After seeing Dream again... He just kept doing it still. Something about the grave still showing that he still ended up losing Dream...

Or something like that.

He doesn't quite know anymore but it helps.

Nightmare manages to get to the garden of the small house they had claimed and takes a deep breath. He hadn't needed to make these jumps in a while and he had to be sure he aimed in the right direction. Just. Easy.

He holds up both hands and feels his magic start to flow out. A small sizzle as a small portal starts to take shape. His breathing gets heavier and heavier. He didn't think it would be this hard... why is it so much harder than before-

Two arms lock around him and he is lifted up. Nightmare's breath escapes in one go and he wiggles before stopping. Nightmare knows these arms by now and knows it is Killer before he even speaks.

"What you doing out here tiny boss?" a chuckle and nuzzle to the side of his skull "I thought we were passed this whole you trying to run away from us." Killer turns him aorund and Nightmare can now see the large pout on his face.

Nightmare looks to the side and wiggles but cant get free, he never can escape their hold. Instead he just crosses his arms and mutters "Just wanted to do something real quick."

Killer hums before Nightmare is pulled much closer and he is flush up agianst Killer. Killer hums much more contently before turning back to the house "So what did you want to do tiny boss? aside from using a lot of your just recovered magic that is."

Why does he feel bad? Why does he feel guilty? He wasn't doing anything bad?? Wait why is that how he thinks about it?

Nightmare tries to think it through but comes up blank. It doesn't help that being near Killer, or any of them really, calms him very quickly. He isn't used to this.

They get back to the house and Nightmare sees three more worried faces and feels worse. They had been sleeping... They shouldn't have noticed or been bothered by him not being there... How did they even notice? He... isn't used to people noticing stuff about him.

They sit him down and Nightmare considers his options... If he wants to use this one chance... maybe if he explains they will just let him do his thing for a bit?

Ngihtmare looks to the side and finds himself muttering "I just wanted to do a thing... it is honestly boring and would have been quick."

----

Horror doesn't like this place. It is the place that holds so much trauma for Nightmare. Where they thought that hurting and torturing a babybones was a good idea.

But Nightmare rarely asks them for anything anymore. And even before he became his true form he rarely asked anything for himself. If he wanted something he could just get it or do it. Now he doesn't have much of a choice and Horror knows this. They all know this.

And well, they are trying to get Nightmare to ask them when he wants things. So when he expressed he wanted something? of course they are gonna make it work.

Even if they have to come here.

Killer stands with his hands on his hips as he looks around the grey coloured forest "Wow! Lots of nothing..."

Cross sends him a glare and hisses "Killer."

Horror agrees, Killer could try to be a bit more sensitive. Normally none of them mind his brass and bolt nature but well.. They are here to visit two graves. Two graves that a six year old made to memorise his family which he thought he had killed.

This is not the time for Killer to be... well Killer.

Killer huffs and looks at Nightmare "Can you believe them?"

Nightmare shrugs but holds the two small bouquet of flowers close. "I didn't really... leave a lot..."

See? That is why they needed to try and be a bit more tactful. Killer luckily seems to notice as he rubs his neck as Cross shoots him a knowing look.

Dust remains by Nightmare's side as he looks around "A hill right?"

Nightmare seems to look all of them over before nodding "Yeah." He points into a random direction "It is that way." and he starts leading the way.

It is strange. The whole world is grey and colourless. Not the white space that Cross had had when his world was destroyed. but just, greyscale. Hell even Cross looks colourful compared to this place.

Cross frowns and takes a few quick steps to now walk on Nightmare's other side "was it always coloured like this?"

Nightmare shakes his skull and thinks for a bit. "I think... if i remember it right... the grey colour started to happen as soon as they cut mother down."

Horror almost wants to sigh in relieve. He keeps it in but this is good. It is something to help stop the guilt. At least that is what Horror is assuming why the graves are still there. guilt. But Horror won't assume.

They leave the forest and see a hill with further in the distance a village. They walk up the hill and find a cut down tree stump and two old and small graves.

Nightmare stands by them for a moment before glancing back at them with a suspicious look "No commentary?"

Horror gets it. They can be assholes.

Killer grins and leans closer "I can do one... but i doubt it adds anything." he pets the small skull before pointedly talking towards the side of the hill to overlook the forest, he pulls Cross allong with him.

Dust remains near Nightmare as a silent shadow and Horror leaves them to have room. Keeping an eye on their small charge as he looks around. Horror has no doubt that this used to be a beautiful place. some of the plants he sees may be grey now but he recognises them for eatable wild flowers.

He can see Nightmare slowly near the graves. He sits on his knees by the two and starts with cleaning both graves. Making sure no dirt or dust is on it and everything is still secure. Afterwards he removes old and, by now, dead flowers. He takes care that those aren't near the graves before returning and leaving new fresh flowers. They had picked up both colourful bouquets from another universe along the way.

At the end he just sits by the two graves as he touches the stone.

Killer and Cross had returned back to them at this point and Killer nudges Cross. Cross shoots him a questionable look before Killer just motiones over his shoulder back at the village before nodding at Nightmare. Horror cna see Cross just stare in utter confusion at Killer before Killer pulls him closer and whispers something to him.

Cross looks back before nodding as he walks over to Dust and whispers some stuff to him. Dust looks thoughtful before nodding as well.

Cross slowly walks over to Nightmare and speaks "Hey..." Nightmare looks up and tilts his skull. Cross smiles "If you want we can go into the village for a bit."

Nightmare frowns "Why would I?"

Cross looks a bit sheepish but Dust picks up "The book was general about what happened. But we figured that those people may have taken stuff or kept things that were yours from you."

Cross nods and grins "We are here now anyway. we can get it back."

Nightmare looks at the village and thinks it over before nodding "okay." he stands up and dusts his pants off of the dirt. Cross ends up softly nudging him towards the side and Dust easily takes his hand before the three walk off.

Horror shoots Killer a look "Why?"

Killer grins as he walks over to the stump "don't worry about it. Want to go with them?"

Horror continues to watch Killer before shaking his skull "I am fine being here."

Killer shrugs and turns to the stump. Staring at the dead tree.

"You wasted your chance."

Horror frowns as he just watches Killer. Killer meanwhile keeps looking at the dead tree.

Killer continues as if he is talking to an actual person "You were given a fucking miracle. We read your story you know. Know that you were only aiming for one child. Instead of being overjoyed and happy that you got two you took him for granted."

Horror sees the edges around Killer's soul waver away from their soul shape but it returns to the soul shape easily.

Killer doesn't stop speaking "You were suposed to be his mother and you failed your job. You never actually cared about him did you? Well." he glares down "You are not getting him back. Ever. He isn't yours anymore."

Horror frowns and studies Killer. No... Killer still doesn't know about the soul adoption, that Horror is sure about. Which means this all? Just Killer.

Killer holds his chin high as he stares down at the stump "I don't know what exactly is happening. But seeing as it is related to the apples it is related to you. So I am telling you now. Even if for some reason you return. Even if you are alive again. You are not getting Nightmare back. He is ours, not yours. You will never find him. You will never get the chance to hurt him."

Horror hears it in his voice. Killer, the one who hates promises more than any of them. Who had lost so much of his freedom and free will because of broken promises. Just made a promise, not even a promise. but a vow.

Horror can't say he is that surprised. After all. After everything in Horrortale and all the pressure from making sure his brother has food and is taken care of. Horror had thought he never wanted to take on a new responsibility ever again. And yet, here he was with a willing soul adoption writen into his very soul.

He also knows the other two aren't doing much better. Dust who hadn't wanted to emotionally or personally connect with anyone ever again. After having killed everyone he cared about he didn't want those relationships anymore. Yet he was the first to take this leap. Commit to Nightmare, and ironically to them all.

Cross who hadn't wanted to take any kind of oath or lifelong promise or mission after his past with the guard and XGaster. He didn't want to tie himself down. Give his all to something or some goal that just hurt him. And while it took him a while he still is devoted to this.

Horror knows they are all powerless against this. It happened but at least this time it was their choice. He thinks it is good, this way they all really knows what it means to do this. To commit to this and all it entails.

A crack of thunder and the three are suddenly on the hill with them again.

horror turns but freezes. Dust is holding a shaking Nightmare close as Cross is already cutting into the fabric of reality with his knife.

Killer and him share a look and are with the other three before they even have to say what happened. They can get an explanation later, for now they need to go.

----

They are back in the house they had been hidding in and Nightmare finally feels himself relax a tiny bit.

Thought that may also be becuase Dust is still holding him and the other's soul is steady and even. It makes his own franctic soul calm down.

Killer looks at them "Do we need to pack up and go?" he is already halfway to the bags.

Cross has closed the portal and watches as the universe patches itself fully closed again, not leaving a single mark, there is a reason Nightmare had worked so hard to get Cross XChara's knife. Aside from the fact that Cross liked fighting with it. It is a very powerful and amazing tool.

Cross sighs in relieve "We should still be good." he turns to the others and starts explaining right away "Nightmare saw Dream."

Killer curses loudly as he kciks the couch. Horror frowns and looks at him "did he see you?"

Nightmare pushes clsoer to Dust but nods.

Killer curses again but Horror frowns "Did he realise it was you?"

Nightmare thinks bakc to Dream staring at him. Awe and surprise clear on his face. The wishfullness had been obvious. The way he had moved towards him, a smile on his face that Ngihtmare hadn't seen since they were both small. Then again, the name he had called him had made it clear who he saw...

Nightmare shrugs.

Horror tilts his skull "Is that yes?"

Nightmare shakes his skull and mutters "yes and no..."

Horror nods as Killer frowns at him "both? How both?"

Nightmare shrugs again but Dust just nudges him gently with his skull nad Nightmare sighs as he quietly explains "I think he knew i was well me... but didn't know i was me me..." he toys with the fabric of the red scarf, Dust lets him. He searches for the right words "He called me Nighty.. and well he hasn't done that since before the apples. Since he still-" Since he still loved him. Nightmare doens't say it out loud but Dust must have figured out something as the hold around his tightens.

Nightmare pushes his face further into the scarf "He will probably think it means something bad... That is what everyone always said my appearance was... and he thinks I am an adult still so... yeah..." His mind is spinning but his soul is calm. in sync of Dust's. calm and slow pulses and beats. It honeslty makes him sleepy.

Dust nuzzles his skull and speaks "Well, He will not find anything and will have to learn to not just listen to rumours. As for even if he had caught you before you got to me, we would get you back." the certainty makes Nightmare pause.

Ngihtmare trries to shoot Dust a look but Dust just keeps rubbing his back and keeping him against him.

Cross nods "obviously. Just a matter of time before we would figure out where you were..." more thoughful "Next time we will have to scuot the universe first. We just didn't today because we figured no one would know about it. Srory for that. Next time you want to visit the graves we will make sure no one will interrupt. okay?"

Nightmare nods as he pushes closer to Dust.

He doesn't even understand why he still wants to visit those graves. Dream isn't even dead!

Even if... even if Dream doesn't...

Those graves shouldn't matter but Ngihtmare still wants to make sure btoh are fine. Maybe it is now just a symbol for the dead relationship between him and Dream. It just gives him a place where he can focus his grief and mourn for the family he lost.

The hand hasn't stopped petting his back and Nightmare feels himself finally fully relax.

At least he really isn't alone... His four are here now and they are still here after the close calls and learning about the graves.

It would be nice to not be alone anymore.

Nightmare lets the calming of his soul lure him to fall asleep. Knowing he is safe and cared for now.

*---------------*

So is anyone surprised i couldn't keep it short? I am not. I know myself. I have a problem and it is this whole AU that has my heart in a choke hold.

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[wroteclassicaly]

This is your REMINDER that Eddie Munson and Steve Harrington would love you if you’re plus sized. Love them so fucking hard and fluster them even harder - they’re putty in your hands. They also really like those jeans that you wear.

[alastair-1205]

May I suggest some of my own teams for this season:

Kinda in order of how much I actually wanna see them. More or less?

[sysig]

Go play pretend on your own (Patreon)

[dykedvonte]

Danse has to get homesick In Sanctuary. Like despite being uncertain of how much his past is real including times with the Brotherhood, those memories were home. The Brotherhood was home especially the Prydwen.

No matter all the comfort and the luxuries SoSu could put to make him feel more relaxed or like it’s his space it’s still not home. It’s so unique to him cause everyone else has a home in a sense. A thing or place they can come and go to as they please while Danse doesn’t. He can never go back to the people he considered family and they can never go to him without serious consequences. It doesn’t help that (due to his own faults and beliefs) a good majority of the new people in his life do not exactly like him.

It’s so isolating for him as the wasteland is also a different culture in general. Theres so much he’s not used to vs what he is. But all in all I think that’s a good thing. I feel as if Danse had a better arc in game it would 100% have him learning or developing a sense of home before a sense of self. I think it gets overlooked that Danse is a person that likes or feels like he needs to belong to something. A cause, a philosophy, a mission. He needs a goal. He must learn to live for himself and his purpose but it’s clear he wants to find that through something which is why he latches onto the Sole Survivor after rather than just wander the wastes. He needs something, anything to base a sense of self on at this point in time and who better than the person that opened their home to him in the first place.

He’s a dude that needs a foundation or home to ground himself on or else he doesn’t know what to do with himself or even start.

[radioactive-dazey]

My thoughts on Thomas Sanders (criticism but more of me complaining)

Something I don't see people talk about nearly enough (read: not at all) is the fact that, we are still analyzing videos that came out 4+ years ago.

It's not the "analyzing old videos" that's the problem. It's the fact there hasn't been any new content since then. It really feels like (at least to me) the fandom (once again, could be just me) is desperately picking at episodes like POF or SVS for any scraps left behind.

I started one of my fics about a year after POF came out and I remember being nervous because "This takes place immediately after putting others first, this could become really dated really fast"

Turns out I had nothing to worry about.

Lack of plot relevant content is one thing. Everything else that has resurfaced rubs salt in the wound.

Oh, and now to address the fandom itself: some of yall have an insane perspective on everything. I'm all for trying to be objective about the criticism (bc lets be real, one or two things ive seen circulating makes me scratch my head,) but blatantly defending Thomas with "he doesn't owe you anything" is so fucking WILD to me.

He's a content creator. It's his job to make content. Ofc nobody expects him to pump it out like a factory machine, and there's mental health to consider, but it is still his job to make content.

I don't even know where this ideology came from. Who sent you all down that path. Was it Thomas complaining setting a boundary over someone demanding content?

For clarification I don't think anyone should be messaging Thomas to demand content but like... come on dude.

Scalding take, Thomas SHOULD thank us for supporting him.

If he's getting burned out from creating TSS content, we as his fandom are entitled to know instead of sitting and waiting. Did you guys know we are closer to the 10 year aniversarry than we are the 5 year one?

It all sucks horribly. I still want to support him. I still want to wait and see what he does next. I still love Sanders Sides and Cartoon Therapy and My Roommate is Hades. But I feel so hypocritical to still support and follow him when all this shit is piling up. I know nobody is forcing me to stick around, but without Sanders Sides, I have nothing going on in my life. This is my only community, and I somehow managed to tie it down with two of my only hobbies with it.

Does he know a chunk of the fandom is angry and now watching his every move? He should.

Edit: oh and I saw spoilers from the patreon of what the new ep is going to be. It's not worth the wait for me personally. Lowkey I think the premise alone is weak asf but I don't know the thing they're referencing super well. Doesn't add much to this post but I wanted to bitch about that too.

[lyrebirdgore]

The god complex is trying to convince me that I need worshippers. I want a cult. I need a fucking cult. Some worship me or I’ll start killing. If someone doesn’t start fucking worshipping me.

I am a divine presence and you my lowly followers, and even as such I’ll give up my body, soul and mind for the first follower to pledge their loyalty to me

[quietlyblooms]

chiyo being loyal like a dog, though... never biting the hand that feeds, that tenderly buries itself in her hair, that stakes its claim upon her. but those who would harm the owner of that hand? she'd make them bleed, bare her teeth, place herself between them and remain there unwavering. she is such a soft woman, but do not mistake softness for weakness.

[statementlou]

agree on your tags re the chemical cover. You can't ignore that there is a theme, and a theme that larries don't like (and tend to ignore). As much as I'd want them to be happy and together I'd wonder how his other half would think about him tainting his relationship in such a negative light.

see but this is so funny to me because me, I was like, man much as I tend to think they might be broken up then we have Louis coming along yet again like yeah so anyway long term relationship, same problems as the same relationship I've been talking about for years and years in songs rather than a song about being single or a break up or something different or whatever.... and then here's you saying the same thing shows that they AREN'T together! Just goes to show that whatever we read as being SO OBVIOUS there's always another way to see it when it's all just hints and shadows on the cave walls

[natjennie]

watcher announcement is insane. I don't have anything insightful or important to say but like. whoaoahh that's crazy.

[fourswords]

shadow and zelda were literally sooooo funny nobody understands how much their final interaction makes me lose it. zelda was like "idk yknow i just really think you could be a good guy if you wanted. just saying." and then she gets fucking kidnapped by the dark cloud and shadow is IMMEDIATELY like Thank You For Saying Something Nice To Me. I Will Now Kill Myself To Save You. and then he doesn't even stay dead

[something-about-sunflowers]

Ooooooohhhhhhh now I’m thinking of an Izzy with an Ella Enchanted style curse on him hhhhhhhhhh

Read-more cause this got away from me lmfao

He keeps it fairly under wraps for most of his life, sets out to sea at twelve, gets picked up by a press gang at seventeen. He manages, its  expected, for a sailor to follow orders on a navy ship, after all (of course ‘no’ isn't an option available to him anyway).

They get boarded by pirates when he's about twenty one and he’s taken on as part of their crew, the captain is after crew more than loot, tells him he should join (saying ‘no’ would have just had him killed, and he's doing his very best to live).

Some time after, he's nearing twenty five, they’re raided by another ship, the Ranger. Benjamin Hornigold likes a ruthless sailor (a ruthless pirate) and Israel Hands has never allowed himself to be anything but. He decides he wants to keep this one. He offers, Izzy accepts. Ben tells him to kill his former captain (wouldn’t have said ‘no’ even if he could have, the man was a bastard).

He earns a reputation of being kind of a kiss-ass, he doesn’t really mind, it keeps most people from asking questions. But Ben’s got his pet projects Edward Teach and John ‘Jack’ Rackham and they’re both too sharp for their own good (though, Jack is better at playing dumb). They notice its not just Captain’s orders he follows to the letter, but everyone’s. They test him, subtly at first, but eventually they show their hand. Tell him that they know there’s more to Izzy’s obedience than he lets on.

He’s terrified for how they might use this against him (the usual ways, which most men abused without even knowing about his curse, easier, safer to let them think he wanted it) but they tell him they don’t want to take his agency from him like that. They offer to help him. He’s not sure whether to trust it (he knows, by rights, he shouldn’t) but he can’t say ‘no’ to ‘trust us, let us help’ (whether Edward is aware of the command, Izzy will never know, decades later Edward doesn’t even remember what he said to convince him).

So they stick by him, as best they can, if someone gives an order he doesn’t want to follow they’ll tell him, quietly as they can, not to. It works, for the most part. Though eventually, Ben notices Izzy’s not quite as obedient anymore (though he still never says ‘no’ to his captain’s orders). He doesn’t like that. He notices Izzy’s been spending more time around Teach and Rackham, decides they’re bad influences (he intends them to captain other ships in his fleet, they’re allowed to push back on orders, Izzy will never have a command of his own, he is not). He separates them. Puts Teach and Rackham on the Marianne with the flimsy excuse of ‘getting practice in’. (he sees them off with Izzy at his side, a claiming hand on his shoulder, Ed and Jack aren't sure how they manage it, but they don't try to kill him right then and there) They now only ever see each other when they all make port. Its a trying few months (for Ed and Jack, for Izzy. . .).

They meet at port one last time (apart, at least). Edward has a plan. They’re going to mutiny. They’ve been stirring the pot on the Marianne (whispers had already started before they got there, not too many of the crew were happy to miss out on loot just because Ol’ Ben had an apparent soft spot for the Crown). He presses his knife into Izzy's hands. Tells him, back on the ship, when everyone else is asleep, he’s to slip into the captain’s cabin and kill Ben, in his sleep, so he can’t order him to stop (Izzy is never sure if he would have said ‘no’ to that unintentional order, had he been able).

The mutiny goes off without a hitch (Ben wakes when the knife plunges into his throat, but he can’t give orders around the steel and the blood that choke him). Edward makes Izzy his first mate, gives Jack the Marianne. He and Izzy go on to create a legend.

Things are good, for a long while they're good. Edward is an inventive and charismatic captain, the crew love him and the loot he leads them to, and Izzy's position (and Edward's possessive protectiveness over him) means that anyone who dares order Israel Hands around, that doesn't have the title of 'his captain', meets a quick end.

Unfortunately, for Izzy, 'good' never tends to last. He'd hoped (and damn him for daring to hope) that he was free, as free as he could be, from his curse, sailing under Edward (Blackbeard), and he was. For a while. Its about a decade later when Edward starts to get bored. He never orders Izzy to do anything degrading or dangerous (more dangerous than he can handle at least) but it still hurts somewhere deep in his chest the first time Edward gives a casual order and doesn't look to see if Izzy wants to follow it.

They come across Jack every now and again. It always takes him a bit to readjust to Izzy, to remember he needs to phrase things as suggestions rather than orders, he always manages eventually. (that little pain in his chest digs a little deeper when he notices Edward avoids giving him orders when Jack is around, though he can't say why) Their crossing paths wind up fewer and farther between as the years go on. One notable visit involved Jack asking Edward to marry him and Anne Bonny ('why not just have your first mate do it?' 'Annie is my first mate, man, 'sides, I want my two best buds to be there for it!'). Izzy isn't sure what to make of Edward's renewed willingness to run into Jack afterwards (only knows that the pain in his chest grows all the sharper for it, and at seeing Jack, happy with Anne, he feels a bit monstrous about that). It doesn't matter much in the end, things go back to normal once Mary/Mark (depending on the day) Read enters the picture and (mostly) steals Annie away from Jack.

And suddenly Izzy finds himself at fifty five, on a beach, wondering ‘what kind of fucking idiot runs his ship aground‘. Edward is intrigued, Izzy can't tell him 'no'.

He hates the Revenge with every fiber of his being. None of the crew listen to him, Edward doesn't back him up (and neither do Fang or Ivan, following their captain's lead). The first time one of the crew gets it into their head to give him a mocking order he nearly passes out with the force it takes him to not jump to the task immediately. He retreats to his cabin later and vomits at the feeling of violation he hasn't felt in decades (he tells himself he hasn't felt it, Edward is his captain, above all else is loyalty to his captain, his own feelings don't matter).

He hates stupid fucking Stede Bonnet most of all. Hates him for putting a light back in Edward's eyes that hasn't been there for a long while. Hates his pompous attitude, his flippant disregard for the institution of piracy, how little he seems to actually care for the safety and well-being of his own men (leave alone the danger he poses to Edward). Most of all he hates that he calls him 'Iggy'.

So when he challenges him to a duel, and he accepts, its only for Edward's sake that he sets the terms at 'banishment' and not 'death'. When he loses he finds he rather wished it had been to the death. (he doesn't understand, Edward wanted this, he hadn't even told him to stop, hadn't ordered him to stop)

He retreats to Spanish Jackie'z to lick his wounds and to work out a plan to pull Edward out of the steady march towards his own demise that he faces aboard the Revenge. Jackie, Izzy is fairly certain, knows about his curse to some extent (he suspects she doesn't abuse the knowledge for the sake of having a bargaining chip, should she need it), she talks him out of any corners the navy bloke with a grudge against Stede Bonnet inadvertently walks him into. She also runs him into Jack Rackham (and Izzy realizes, at the sight of the silver starting to peek its way through his dirty blond, that its been nearly ten years since they've last seen each other, that pain in his chest not any duller for it) and the last piece of the plan falls into place. Jack tries to talk him out of it, says its not a good idea, even offers him a position on his own ship (not that its his ship to offer anymore, since Annie took over captaincy and made Mary/Mark her first mate, but they've both always had a soft spot for Izzy on account of Jack's soft spot for Izzy, they'd be more than willing), not once does he order though and Izzy can't let Edward keep doing this to himself. Jack will understand when he sees him, Izzy says. Jack goes.

(Izzy hears, when the navy gunners crow triumphantly about hitting the dinghy, the one that Jack and Edward were in, the one that Edward jumped out of, he tells himself not to let it show when that pain in his chest comes back twenty-fold at the thought)

Edward claims the Act of Grace. He and Stede Bonnet leave to lick the king’s boots. Izzy doesn't make it a single day as captain. Edward comes back just before he goes overboard with the anchor to follow. He comes back wrong. Izzy can't take it. Edward can't take it.

The Kraken wakes and Izzy is introduced to the concept of a living hell. (even the captive crew stop trying to give him orders, at the haunted look in his eye, when they see how the Kraken orders him around, when he discovers Spriggs alive, if a lot worse for the wear, he doesn't even need the order to keep it under wraps, he doesn't want to know what the Kraken would order him to do if the boy is found out, he shudders at the thought)

When stupid fucking Stede Bonnet (and his marooned crew) finds his way back to the Revenge Izzy allows himself a single moment to feel relieved. Until, at least, the Kraken orders him to kill the man. He can't. He fights. The crew are all shouting at him not to, it eases the strain. The Kraken levels his pistol at his head, the crew goes silent.

'Israel, I order you to kill Stede Bonnet'.

His sword is in his hand. Stede's gotten better with his own sword, is managing to hold his own against Izzy (in truth, its mostly due to Izzy straining to not follow the order, but there is a marked improvement). The Kraken growls 'Kill him Izzy, fucking- kill him!' Izzy loses his sword to the mast again (he's grateful this time), his knife is in his hand a second later. He's got less reach than Stede does but Stede is trying not to hurt him. Why is he trying not to hurt him?

'Bonnet. Bonnet, you have to stop me. I can't. I can't kill you. I can't let him do that to himself. You have to. Run me through. Right here-' he taps his chest with his free hand, the one that isn't swinging the knife around, the left side, right over his heart '-only way to stop this. He might even listen to you afterwards.'

'Izzy. Izzy no.' In his shock, Stede lowers his sword. Izzy swears as he knocks it out of his hand. Presses close, crowds him against the doors to the captain's cabin, knife against his throat.

'Just fucking kill him already!'

A bead of blood wells under the tip of the blade. Izzy meets his own eyes in the polished reflection of his knife.

'Izzy stop fucking around and do what I told you to!'

His hands shake with the weight of the order. There are tears in his eyes, he can see them in his reflection.

A memory comes, unbidden: He, Edward, and Jack hiking through dense jungle to find a witch that Jack thinks might be able to break his curse, or at least tell them how to break it themselves. Her words 'I cannot break this curse Israel, this is something you must do for yourself. I can tell you this, however, to do this you'll need to face yourself. Face yourself and free yourself. That is all I can say, I'm sorry, I'd tell you more if I could.' They'd left disappointed, Jack cursing about scams and 'you can't even trust witches these days, man', Edward contemplatively silent.

Face yourself and free yourself. Izzy's eyes flick upwards to Stede's concerned face, back down to the blade. He meets his own eyes again.

'Izzy-' The rest of the Kraken's words go unheard.

Izzy tells himself, voice scarcely more than a breath: 'You will not be obedient.'

He feels, more than sees, Stede's gasp. He ignores it. His hand still wants to press the knife upwards. He tries again.

'You will not be obedient.' A little louder this time.

'The fuck did you just say-' Again.

'You will not be obedient!'

The knife flies across the deck, lands with a clatter. Silence (but for the sound of Izzy's labored breaths).

He turns, ignores the shocked crew, meets Edward's wide eyes with his own watery ones (when had the tears started falling so freely?).

'. . . Iz. . . ?'

Everything goes black.

[talesfromthebandgeekmafia]

Cried at Lord of The Rings tonight T—T

[adashofniallandasprinkleoflunacy]

just watched One Day on netflix….not okay 😭😭 made me think of demonrry and angel 😭😭😭

DONT!!!!!!!! SAY THAT!!!!!!!!!!!