#the labels ruined everything
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
oh-my-damn · 2 years ago
Note
Too many chris fans cant deal with their Prince Charming not being Prince Charming.
Tumblr media
You said it, sis.
It's funny bc I've actually gone through this several times already.
I guess I've been off my "making fun of Topher" game for too long to have people following me who don't know what my opinion on this shit is?
Which also goes to show that whoever that person is, they're not an OG. They're not a true supporter. And they're probably not one of the wonderful people I recognize reblogging and commenting on my stuff every single time I post something new writing wise.
Because those people know already.
Mandy may be unhinged and act out from time to time, but eventually she always goes back, and we'll be doing our normal thirsting and writing as usual.
I do actually LOVE how many people are now messaging me and following me bc they agree with my takes on this (even if I can't for the life of me make a dent in my inbox rn) bc for a while I felt a bit alone regarding my opinion on the topic, until I found the Mafia squad and the peeps there!
I don't require everyone following me to agree with everything I say (especially not when I'm tipsy like today) but I do require one thing.
That you let me be me. That you let me have my opinions. That you don't send me hate asks or "announce your exit" because you disagree with my opinions.
Like for real. Don't try to put me down for having my opinions? There's a reason they're mine and there's a reason I share them on here. Because this is my blog.
And the people who go "Oh I really enjoyed your writing but now you ruined it" BOOOHOOO
The 1M reads on Wattpad will keep me company at night even if you leave, booboo, don't you worry 😌🥰
12 notes · View notes
zappedbyzabka · 9 months ago
Text
This is what I like to imagine Ali and Johnny could have been like when no one was around lol
23 notes · View notes
graceful-not · 3 months ago
Text
Yk what actually. I'm sick of staying quiet Conya is a perfectly fine ship. I don't understand why people dislike it so much. In early Ninjago? Sure, back then it wasn't the greatest dynamic and didn't really have much in terms of actually substantive interactions. But people are still casually hating on it and putting it on DNI lists right next to ships like Greenflame like they're comparable and I'm sickkkk of it it's been YEARS!! Their dynamic has grown so much since then!!!! They're on the same level as Braincell for me in terms of ships I really like I think they have a great and interesting dynamic!!!! They're cute together!!!!!! EVEN OUTSIDE OF MUDSHOCK!!!!! RAGHH!!!!!!!!!
#ninjago#conya#cole brookstone#nya smith#nya jiang#I will always personally prefer platonic Conya but their relationship is still so so important to me in a way thats very specific#to me being Aro. Like. Idk. It's not exactly QPR stuff bc I dont think they would ever label anything but that also means that I don't think#they would hate a romantic label either!!!!!! Raghhh!!!!!!!!!! They're friends above everything else though obviously 💯💯 theyve always#got eachothers backs#Also i do prefer Mudshock just because Conya doesn't make sense to me w/o Jay somehow in the mix unless there's some sort of messy breakup#involved. And. Jay would never really take that well and it would sort of just sour the whole group dynamic esp since Cole is Jays bestie#and ALL OF THAT just to get two characters together feels so shallow to me shdjsgd. Like. Idk. None of that crap is worth it the romance#isnt anywhere near necessary for the two. Their bond is unspoken and they're satisfied enough w/ what they are right now even if they could#be smthn else#I just dont like the 'Lets ruin/throw away all of our othe relationships for LOVE 😍😍!! Because for some reason romantic relationships are#automatically more important and deep and mean more to us than any other relationship so its totally worth it every time!!!' it feels so.#like. amatonormative. Yk?#anyways ill shutup now I LOVE THEM!!! I LOVE THEM!!!!!!!!#they make my aro heart really really happy ok. I dont know jow to explain it but i have another post abt them in the conya tag I think
11 notes · View notes
jaylaxies · 8 months ago
Text
i’m gonna repost some old hard thoughts which got community labelled 🫡
8 notes · View notes
imminent-danger-came · 1 year ago
Note
do you think mks cosmic backstory conflicts with the previous conflict of his insecurities of being the wrong successor?
Not at all!
When it comes down to it, MK's main flaw is his lack of belief in himself ("Just believe in yourself! Even a smidge makes all the difference")—that's him at his core. He's also identity issues the character ("I'm not the Monkey King okay!" "You're right—you're the Monkie Kid! You have to find your own way to win."), and I think s4 laid into this quite nicely.
Throughout seasons 1 and 2 MK was trying to live up to the legacy of "Monkey King". That's what 1x06 and 1x09 are motivated by—MK is trying to make himself stronger and more like Wukong ("I just wanted to be good enough—like you."). Really 2x05 just worsened a problem MK already had. He was already having doubts about being the Monkie Kid, and SWK leaving in 2x01 was a crack in an already unstable foundation. So then in 2x06 and 2x09 you have MK desperately trying to get stronger, to be a sort of Monkey King stand in ("Pretty soon, Monkey King won't even need to come back!"), and that all comes crashing down in 2x10. And, not only does MK fail, he loses the staff and his powers.
This takes us to 3x01, where MK IMMEDIATELY tries to be Wukong once again:
Tumblr media
Sun Wukong: "Kid, why did ya-" MK: "Uh, well yeah, I was trying to do you in the omelet story! Do the weird impulsive Monkey King thing and escape the bad guy."
Tumblr media
Sun Wukong: "Well, I mean- Ne Zha ain't really a bad guy but- did you forget about the part where I got really hurt?"
(3x01 On The Run) (Hi MK good guy v bad guy mentality)
-
MK doesn't refer to himself as the Monkie Kid again until after he's able to use gold vision in 3x03, listing off a few of his labels:
"But I, Monkie Kid, delivery boy, somewhat equal to heaven—saw right through your trick." (3x03 Smartie Kid; another label)
Which, MK and his labels are a big deal ("Hero"/"Warrior" in 2x07, Noodle Boy, Successor, the "Plan Man" in 4x12). It's specifically what the curse antagonizes MK with in s4:
Subodhi: “Who or what you are, even I do not know the answer—but of one thing, I am certain: fate has plans for you! Great plans, or foul? Time will tell.” MK: "I- I can't be! I'm just MK!" Subodhi: "The Monkie Kid?" MK: *Gasps*
-
Curse MK: "Tell me, what do you think we are, honestly, cause I have been DYING to hear us say it, out loud." MK: "What kind of a question is that? I'm just- I'm just MK, a noodle delivery guy with the powers of the Monkey King, no biggie."
-
Curse MK: "Seriously? You still think we're just some noodle delivery guy? You can't remember where you came from, and we got ALL this power, and you never once thought, why us? What are we, what is our purpose?" MK: "Of course I thought about it! I mean- maybe, I was gonna thought about it I just- I just want to be me. To be MK!" Curse MK: "Yeah well, we all know exactly where that leads, don't we." Lady Bone Demon Echo: "To pain."
-
Curse MK: "We're just like Wukong, a fraud! A trickster! Why would our legacy be any different?"
-
MK: "No, no you're wrong I'm- I'm not!" Curse MK: "Not what, some Monkey Demon thing destined to bring chaos upon the world? Come on, use your words big brained boy, say it, what are we?"
-
Curse MK: "You can see it, can't you? This is your fate. Your friends will turn on you, seeing you for the monster you will become! They will destroy you, harbinger of chaos."
-
There's all of these different things MK is either trying to be or trying to not be, which all plays back into his identity. It also all plays back to one thing: his lack of belief in himself.
He's either not enough like Wukong or too much like his mentor. He's either not strong enough or too strong, destined to cause nothing but chaos and destruction. He's either not going to be able to protect the people he cares about, or he's going to be the very thing that hurts them. It's the same problem, just on different sides of the spectrum.
The 3x14 "Do you still really think the universe wants anything, from any of us?" to 4x08 "Until I know what I am, what my destiny is? I can't risk hurting the people I care about—the one's I have left" pipeline is both wild and important to note. It's the switch from MK believing he's nothing special, to believing he's the very "harbinger of chaos". It's all about his self-perception.
And honestly, when it comes down to it, he probably still believes he's the wrong successor, just for very different reasons now. You and I both know that there was no other choice for a protégé—who else would have been able to wield the Monkey King's staff and have his powers—but I doubt MK is in a place to come to terms with that. I think that realization is going to be part of his downward spiral next season, along with being one of the things that instigates the SWK V MK fight.
It's very on point that the way MK comforts Wukong at the end of 4x11 is through reaffirming his role as the "Monkey King":
Tumblr media
MK: "Monkey King- I'm not ready to not have a mentor. Azure needs to be stopped but- we need you. I need you- to be the Monkey King."
(4x11 A Lifetime of Mistakes)
-
While the way he antagonizes Azure is to threaten his role as a Hero (also referencing his role as an Uncle, and before that his role as a friend):
Tumblr media Tumblr media
MK: "Come on! Come on! Come on Unkie Lion, you're the big hero right? Then prove it. Show me!"
(4x13 Rip and Tear)
-
*Gestures financially* IDENTITY
Bonus "What I am" parallels post because it's pretty relevant I feellmk
39 notes · View notes
undertow1993 · 2 months ago
Text
tool fans watching ghost fans get upset over exuberant VIP ticket prices and a no phones policy
Tumblr media
1 note · View note
bumblingbabooshka · 1 year ago
Text
Tumblr media
Worst Guy Ever - Also, Unfortunately, Very Homosexual Convo. (subtextually)
#Evidence of Tom being a bad boyfriend is also in a file labeled 'Tom wants to fuck Steth so bad'#but seriously I wanted to deck him in this convo v_v FORTUNATELY it is bearable bc I think that's the point - like the narrative is#showing that Tom is 'ruining what he's worked for' by being a dick to B'Elanna so I'm not like meta-mad about it (like OTHER Tom/B'Elanna#moments) <- Ex: Tom saying 'I have a beautiful girlfriend' instead of something like#'someone I care about/a girl I love' but that's a like...tv writing thing. I don't like it but I know it's a tv writing thing#Woman as like a status symbol instead of a person you care about#I never care about Tom's inner conflict in Tom episodes (with the exception of the one where he gets thrown in solitary - him going full#rogue was fun) bc his inner conflict is always the most boomer bullshit#Literally he's just having a midlife crisis in this one.#BUT...GUYS....IMPORTANT NEWS...BULLDOG'S IN THIS ONE??#BULLDOG ?? My enemy BULLDOG BRISCOE from Frasier??? Good to see you man! This makes sense.#Steth....WHY would you choose to turn into a guy with a detailed and established web of interconnected relationships on a ship with a#complex hierarchy? Steth really thought he'd be able to play it cool on VOYAGER...the USS codependent...nu uh#they sniff you out and maul you like gophers on that baby#EHHEHEEH the Emh is funny as hell...'WOW...I had no idea me being so perfect at everything was making you feel bad! It all makes sense to#me now...' / Steth(as Tom):....Yeah v_v#SNRKEHEHEHEHEHEH GUYS..I'm taking a mental health day so I can reflect on myself and how even though I'll never be as good as the Doctor#I'm probably still worth SOMETHING#Steth(as Tom): Hey now B'Elanna...let's not go around blaming Steth for things. He's a pretty cool guy actually.#Okay yes confirmed! The above convo is also to show that Steth is 'being better' than Tom by telling B'Elanna what she wants to hear#unfortunately this does not make me like Tom more#SHE WANTS SO LITTLE. SHE ASKS FOR SO LITTLE.#BC Tom DOES say that B'Elanna is 'overreacting' and basically calls her crazy even when it's not for a later moral lesson and#this isn't framed as bad by the narrative. If your girl's always mad at you then your relationship ISN'T good.#There's literally NO resolution once again to their relationship issues. Tom shows her his garage program and when B'Elanna says she feels#she doesn't value her he says 'Yeah I do.' episode ends.#T/B scenes are literally [conflict arises then they argue or kiss] <- it is never...RESOLVED...#Me @ The Writers: (B'Elanna voice) Is this your idea of an adult conversation?#OH. Gay subtext: I hate spending time with my girl I want to hang out and live the bachelor life with my cool guy friend.#Tom's grease monkey program might as well be a subscription to playgirl magazine sit DOWN dude
10 notes · View notes
elidelochaned · 10 months ago
Text
ohhhh the urge to delete instagram
6 notes · View notes
bandzboy · 9 months ago
Text
apparently some of the d-day screenings in isnotreal are sold out and even after everything that people did like contact hybe and trafalgar releasing they won’t cancel the dates but it’s insanely disappointing that now that some of these days are sold out or almost they definitely don’t want to cancel anything because they just care about money and i honestly want people to sit with this information. this is not to say that you should give up on it! we need to fight until the very end while also being aware the fact that, unfortunately, they might not cancel it and that the backlash will happen
4 notes · View notes
1-800-internal-damnation · 1 year ago
Text
Neurotically downloading images of jason todd muttering "he's just like me fr. just like me. just like me fr"
5 notes · View notes
thatdeaffeel · 2 years ago
Note
Same anon about disability label: I think it’s valid about the context having an effect on the use of it but how are my thoughts ableist? I’d never condemn someone for not identifying as disabled, like I said, because labels are such personal things. But the fact that you equate the word disability as “less than” IS a problem and is what I’m talking about of people being ableist. Why do you look at disabled people and automatically assume they’re less than the abled? The disability community has been trying to empower ourselves by stepping away from that sort of narrative for centuries. It isn’t that *we* are the problem, it’s that society is not built with us in mind. And isn’t that exactly what the deaf community also thinks about the hearing community? I’m so confused about the fact that some people are basically alienating multi-disabled people from the subject of deafness and its culture and how it relates to disability. It doesn’t have to be all one thing. You can have culture that is specific to deaf people’s experiences, away from the hearing community, and not completely erase disability from it. Especially when you consider the fact that the disability justice movement (as far as I’m aware) has always been inclusive of deaf people who identify as disabled and they work to help gain things like accommodations and rights that we all deserve. Without the rest of the disability community fighting alongside us, we probably would not be where we are today. I don’t think it means we owe other disabled people anything, of course, but shouldn’t we consider being inclusive and understanding of their culture too, if not only because it overlaps so much with the deaf community?
I am a disabled person.
I don't look at disabled people as less than. It's not what I've said, not what I've intended to express and not a view im comfortable with you projecting onto me.
You're putting a lot of words into my mouth that i haven't spoken, you've gotten upset at a label I've mentioned OTHER PEOPLE reject.
Whether a singular deaf person or the wider deaf community reject or accept the label of disability has absolutely fuck all to do with me.
I haven't specified where i stand.
You have though. In your every insistence of my opinion that you don't know.
Stop treating me like an envoy to an entire culture.
You ignored the crux of my argument and what i intended to say, albeit poorly it seems, for a perceived slight.
Said more explicitly; You're preoccupation with labels as identity is not universal. Whether a deaf person or the wider deaf community use those labels does not concern you.
I do not speak for all deaf people. When i answer vaguely as I did before it is because you are forcing me to speak for all deaf people.
Kindly, wither.
7 notes · View notes
malkaviian · 2 years ago
Text
random oc facts, of the "they have problems" flavor
#oc talk#1- luca developed claustrophobia from the time he was locked in the school's bathroom by her bullies#2- chase got his depression from his mom; who also has it; except she goes to therapy and has meds so its now somewhat controlled#he was quite the spoiled kid by both his parents but his mom was the one who would always agree with him and give him everything#even if he was in the wrong and the worst piece of shit he could be. she felt guilty about him getting clinical depression for 'her fault'#so she wanted to 'compensate him' for 'ruining his life'. he was still pretty harsh with both of them so.#one day he told her to kill herself and go to hell over a minor thing; that same night he went to see finnley#so he never knew his mom actually tried to kill herself if thats what he wanted. his dad was kinda bitter for a few days#but eventually forgave him. and as i said none of them told him anything so he never knew.#3- maverick still gets nervous when he sees cops or hears police sirens - hes always on the edge#whether theyre going to actually arrest him some day. he doesnt know if zachary's body was ever found as he avoided tv for that reason#like he hid it in an abandoned house. it was a horrible hiding place but it was the closest he had and he was panicking with a dead body#so its not like he could do the smartest things in that state. also of course he left his dna everywhere- finding him would be really easy#but it never happened since zachary came back before anyone noticed his disappearance. and with a new appearance#its was like the old zachary people knew just stopped existing entirely. you cant do a murder case without a body#so it was just labeled as a sudden disappearance. however mav is paranoid over it when in his non-empty state#and when hes empty hes so focused in finding someone new to obsess over he stops caring- maybe he could even find someone on prison!#4- rafael doesnt talks to his family due to charlotte manipulating him into believing theyre all horrible people who hate her#and in fact they hate her! mostly his sister. they hate what she did to their son/brother but hes so blind and easy to manipulate#they stopped trying to knock some common sense into him. his sister was afraid this would happen eventually bc he was always gullible#SPECIALLY when hes in love. and well guess what happened!!#5- on the topic of charlotte; she has both tried to kill herself AND kill someone. well; her 'suicide attempt' was more likely#wanted to get hospitalized but not *actually* ending her life. in her mind that would make her parents notice how much they hurt her#with their 'favoritism' towards raven. girl they literally never had a favoritism YOU are the one who think so!!!#she never got what she wanted though-- she ended up vomiting the pills and suddenly got too embarrassed to talk about it#and guess who she wanted to kill? exactly; raven! they would sometimes see each other on family reunions and it was weird#she bought anti-freezer and brought it to a reunion-- she has been on a barista course so technically no one would think anything#if she made drinks for everyone. but raven was just so insistent on seeing the process-- due to actual curiosity-- that she couldnt do it#so she came home with an anti-freezer and incredible frustrated lmao. she was 17 though so its not like it was thoroughly planned#but you know. the intention was there.
3 notes · View notes
toothmarqed · 7 months ago
Text
idk if it’s just that social interaction (esp one that doesn’t follow a normal routine, ie hang out w someone in a class, repeat similar jokes, same thing every time) makes my symptoms worse (at least everything other than the chronic emptiness) or this summers just got me acting up but damn. this is hellish
1 note · View note
autisticlee · 10 months ago
Note
About the label thing. I agree with you. Recently I've read a book where someone argued against labels (and autism diagnosis etc) claiming that labels hold people back. As if someone who would get an autism diagnosis wouldn't act autistic if they're not labelled autistic... That author believes that if you believe in something enough it comes true so if you say you can't do something it's your fault for not believing you can do it... Like of course positivity and trying out things has it's place but some take it too far so that accepting realistic limitations is out of the picture. Like realistically there are things people just have a harder time with compared to someone who isn't autistic. Besides people who say don't make autism your personality, didn't people already have that personality before getting the label that explains the behaviour and personality type...
sounds like toxic positivity to me. which can be just as harmful as being too negative. some people really don't get that and think being realistic or honest = negativity and think toxic positivity is the Right/Only way.
but seriously. the reason I got diagnosed with autism is because I wanted to know the reason why I had autistic traits and was severely struggling in life and couldn't make them go away no matter how hard I tried. i'm not acting autistic because I was told I am lmao it's always been here
1 note · View note
seltzerfordogs · 1 year ago
Text
is there a buzzfeed quiz for figuring out if I’m actually aroace or just extremely avoidant of close relationships
1 note · View note
itneverendshere · 5 months ago
Text
you said i have to trust more freely - r.c series (one)
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
requested here;
pairing: rafe x pogue!reader. word count: 8.9k
Tumblr media
The North Carolina heat simmered under the August sun, but the sprawling campus of the university felt like a different world, far removed from the humid beaches of figure eight. This was a place where social lines blurred, where kooks and pogues no longer carried the same weight, they did back home.
Or at least, that’s what you had hoped.
Of course, Rafe Cameron, had to ruin that for you. When you found out, he’d gotten into the same school as you, you had begged your lucky stars and then some, that he’d stay the hell out of your way. It was one thing to put up with his bullshit back home, it was easy to avoid him since you attended very different high schools. Very different places and crowds.
He was an arrogant, entitled brat, always ready to throw his family’s money around to get what he wanted. But here, on campus, you hoped things would be different. You hoped that the prestige and maturity of university life would somehow keep him away. After all, wasn’t this a fresh start for everyone?
 But now his name was plastered in the same class as you. 
You had never thought you'd find yourself in the same academic sphere as him. As far as you were concerned, he didn’t give a shit about history, let alone the History of Empire, Colonialism and Post-colonialism. His major was…something to do with business, you were sure of it.  It had to be a mistake. Some sort of system error, of course.
The first day of classes, however, quickly ruined any hopes of a peaceful coexistence. As you entered the lecture hall for your course—you saw him. Rafe sat in the middle of the room, slouched back in his chair with that same self-assured stupid smirk that made you want to throw a table at this face. His presence was an unwanted reminder of everything you were trying to escape. 
Labels. Constant violence between clicks.
You took a seat as far from him as possible, near the front where you could focus on the lecture and block out any distractions. 
“Oh, if it isn’t my favorite pogue.”
Your heart sank at the sound of his voice, that familiar sneer cutting through the quiet anticipation that filled the lecture hall. You didn’t even need to turn around to know he was talking to you. But you did.
He leaned back in his chair; arms crossed with an air of superiority that had always grated on you. His voice was just loud enough to catch the attention of a few other students nearby, some of whom glanced your way with mild curiosity. It was the kind of attention you had hoped to avoid, but of course, Rafe had other plans.
“You know, I didn’t think you’d be interested in a class like this,” he continued, his tone dripping with condescension. “I figured you’d stick to something more…fitting.”
He was so infuriating. Didn’t even know the first thing about you or your major.
You clenched your jaw, refusing to let him get a rise out of you. He was baiting you, trying to get under your skin like he always did back home. The smirk on his face told you he was enjoying this far too much.
“It’s a required course, Cameron,” you replied coolly, turning back to face the front of the room. “Not that you’d know anything about what’s fitting for me.”
Rafe chuckled, the sound low and mocking. “Touchy, touchy. Come on, we’re not in high school anymore. We’re all adults here, right? Let’s play nice.”
“Why are you here?”
His smirk widened at your question as if he’d been waiting for you to ask. He leaned forward, resting his elbows on the desk, looking entirely too comfortable for someone who had just waltzed into a class that was clearly way out of his depth.
“Had a spare elective to fill,” he said with a shrug as if it were the most obvious thing in the world. “Thought this class would be easy enough—history and all that. Figured I’d coast through it.”
You couldn’t help it; you laughed. The sound burst out of you, catching Rafe off guard. His smirk faltered for a moment, his eyes narrowing slightly as if he wasn’t sure whether to be offended or amused.
“Coast through it?” you repeated, shaking your head in disbelief. “You really have no idea what you’ve signed up for, do you?”
Rafe’s expression shifted, a flash of irritation crossing his face.
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
You turned in your seat to face him fully, a small, satisfied grin playing on your lips. For once, you had the upper hand, and you were going to enjoy it. 
“This isn’t some high school history class. We’re talking about the intricacies of empire-building, the impact of colonialism on societies, and the complexities of post-colonial power dynamics. It’s not exactly lightreading.”
He looked at you skeptically, “So what, it’s a bunch of essays and books? How hard can it be? You’re here.”
So charming it nearly killed you.
You raised an eyebrow at his last comment, letting the subtle insult roll off your back. “Good luck then.”
Rafe’s bravado faltered even more, but he quickly recovered, leaning back in his chair again, “Well, I guess I’ll just have to prove you wrong then, won’t I little pogue?”
You shrugged, turning back to the front of the room as the professor started speaking, but you couldn’t stop the small smile tugging at the corners of your lips. It was almost laughable—Rafe Cameron, who probably hadn’t read a book cover to cover since middle school, thinking he could breeze through a class that was known for being one of the toughest in the department. You almost felt sorry for him.
 Almost.
As the professor launched into a discussion about the British Empire and its influence on global trade, you kept half an ear on the lecture and half on Rafe, curious to see how he would react. At first, he seemed content to doodle in the margins of his notebook, barely paying attention. But as the lecture went on, you noticed him glancing up more often, his brow furrowing slightly as the professor delved into the complexities of colonial economics.
Oh, this was going to be so much fun. Maybe watching Rafe finally struggle at one little thing in life was exactly what you needed.
You couldn’t resist the urge to glance back at him when the professor mentioned the labor-intensive plantation economies in the Caribbean. Rafe was staring at the board now, his expression more… confused? Blue eyes moved along the words as if they didn’t make any sense to him. Maybe this class would be the humbling experience he desperately needed.
When the lecture ended, he was one of the first to stand, shoving his notebook into his bag with a little more force than necessary. You had to bite back a laugh, again.
You took your time gathering your things, waiting for him to make a move or say something, but he just walked out without another word. Ooops. Maybe Big Bad Rafe learned a new lesson. 
The semester rolled on, you and Rafe went back to avoiding each other in class. 
You watched with a certain amount of satisfaction as he struggled through lectures, occasionally catching him furiously scribbling notes or staring blankly at the professor as if the concepts were being explained in a foreign language. It was almost comical to see someone like him so out of his element. Every time he fumbled an answer during a class discussion or looked around for someone to give him a clue, you couldn't help but feel a thrill of vindication. 
Meanwhile, you kept your distance, focusing on your work and trying to understand the complexitiesof university life on your own terms. But as the days passed, it became harder to ignore a different reality setting in—one you hadn’t expected. 
Uni wasn’t so different from home, not to you at least. Despite your hopes, it seemed the lines between kooks and pogues hadn’t entirely disappeared. Sure, the university was supposed to be a place of new beginnings, but you found yourself struggling to fit in.
You weren't exactly the social butterfly, and you could count your friends on one hand. The cliques here were different—subtler than the ones back home, but just as impenetrable. Weekends were the hardest, with endless Instagram stories of parties you weren’t invited to, people forming bonds over experiences you didn’t share. It hurt more than you’d care to admit. 
Maybe you weren’t putting yourself out there enough, but could you really afford to? You were on a full scholarship, and parties were the last thing on your mind—you couldn’t afford to mess this up. Every penny went to essentials like food and books. Fashion and makeup weren’t even on the radar, but in another world, maybe they would’ve been. A girl could dream.
And then there was Nate. 
Dreamy, golden Nate—a junior with a smile that could light up a room. He was so…perfect. You’d been crushing on him since the first day you saw him in the hallway, before your social studies class, but he didn’t even know you existed. He asked you for a pen in class once, and you nearly freaked out. He’d been so polite. Your heart pounded so loud you were sure he could hear it. But after that brief moment, it was like you faded back into the background. He returned the pen with a cute thanks and moved on, like you were just another face in the crowd. It was silly to hold on to that tiny interaction, but you couldn’t help it. 
Boys like Nate never looked at you. You didn’t have the spark they searched for. 
Unfortunately, Rafe still did.
After another particularly grueling lecture, you were packing up your things when you heard that all-too-familiar nasal voice behind you. 
“Enjoying the view from the front of the class?”
You rolled your eyes, refusing to turn around. You’d been having a shit week, fed up with being alone. Your friends from back home had their own life’s now, so talking to them was almost impossible too. 
You were on the brink of an existential crisis.
“I’m surprised you’re still showing up. Thought you’d have dropped by now.”
Rafe didn’t respond immediately, and when he did, his voice had a sharper edge than usual. “Y'know, I might not be the smartest in this stupid class, but at least ‘m not alone all the time.”
That made you pause, your hands stilling over your notebook. You slowly turned to face him, raising an eyebrow. “What’s that supposed to mean?”
He crossed his arms with that same infuriating lazy smirk, but there was something different about it this time—something colder.
“It means I’m having the time of my life watching you struggle, watching you be miserable while everyone else is out having fun. Not invited to any parties, huh? Must suck.”
The fake pity almost made you lose your temper. You hadn’t realized he’d been paying that much attention, hadn’t considered that he’d notice, but of course, he’d put in the work to make a pogue’s life even worse.
The truth in his words stung even more because it was exactly what you’d been feeling, what you’d been trying to ignore. But now, hearing it out loud, from him of all people, made it so much worse.
You clenched your fists, trying to keep your composure, “Not everyone has daddy’s money, some of us have to put in the work. You think I give a shit about stupid parties?”
His left eye twitched in irritation and for a second you thought you had hit it where it hurts, but instead, he chuckled through his nose, “Must be exhausting, trying to prove something to everyone.”
“I don’t know. Is it?” You snapped, unable to hold back any longer, “This isn’t Figure Eight. Leave me the hell alone.”
“Where’s the fun in that, hmm?”
Rafe's smirk widened; his eyes gleaming with that familiar arrogance. He thrived on getting under people's skin, especially someone like you. It was a sick game he played, always pushing, always testing, just to see how much it would take for someone to crack. He was sick.
“You know,” he continued, his tone mockingly thoughtful, “Maybe I should keep an eye on you. Make sure you don’t drown in all this responsibility.”
His words were smooth, almost kind, but the condescension behind them was palpable.
You could feel your blood boiling, but you knew better than to give him the satisfaction of seeing you snap. Rafe was the kind of guy who fed on drama, who would twist any reaction into ammunition against you. You took a deep breath, trying to calm yourself.
“Don’t you have anything better to do?” you asked, your voice cold as ice.
He chuckled, pushing off the desk and taking a step closer. “Oh, come on. Don’t pretend you don’t enjoy our little chats. I’m the only excitement you get around here.”
The nerve of him. The arrogance. What was he getting out of this?
“Sorry to disappoint,” you said, your voice laced with sarcasm, “but I’d rather shoot myself in the face than spend another minute talking to you. Goodbye.”
You left the classroom that day with your heart pounding. You pushed his words aside, focusing on what mattered: your studies, your goals, and making it through each day. 
Weeks passed, and slowly, life at university began to shift. You met two girls in your sociology class—Ava and Harper. They were the kind of girls who seemed to have everything together: effortlessly stylish, confident, and always surrounded by friends. You’d admired them from a distance, never thinking they’d notice someone like you. But one day, after an impromptu group discussion, they invited you to join them for coffee. That was a big day.
Ava was a whirlwind of energy, always laughing, always with a story to tell. Harper was more reserved, but her quiet confidence and sharp wit drew you in. She was hilarious.
To your surprise, they were kind, and over time, the three of you became inseparable. You weren’t alone anymore. For the first time in weeks, you started to feel like you belonged. They didn’t care that you were a pogue, not even knowing what that meant. They liked you for you, and that meant more than anything. 
One Tuesday night, Ava and Harper invited you to a party. It was the kind of party you’d only seen in movies—the fraternity house was practically a mansion, very different from the bonfire parties you were used to back home. You hesitated at first, thinking about your responsibilities. But they insisted, promising it would be fun, and you knew you could use a break. After all, it was just one night.
When you arrived, the music was pounding, lights flashing in time with the beat. People were dancing, and laughing, and the air was filled with the scent of perfume and alcohol. Ava and Harper pulled you into the crowd, introducing you to people you’d never have approached on your own. You were nervous, but they made it easier, always by your side, making sure you felt included.
After a while, you decided to grab a drink, needing a moment to yourself to take it all in. You found the kitchen, which was packed with people mixing drinks, talking loudly over the music. You were pouring yourself a soda when you felt a presence beside you—someone too close for comfort.
“Didn’t expect to see you here,” a familiar voice drawled.
Rafe. Because of course, he’d be here, at the very party you’d finally decided to attend. You kept your eyes on your drink, not wanting to engage, but he wasn’t going to let you off that easy.
“What, no comeback?” he teased, leaning against the counter beside you. “That’s not like you.”
You took a deep breath, reminding yourself not to let him get to you. “I’m not in the mood, Cameron.”
He smirked, picking up a beer bottle and taking a swig. “Looks like you’ve upgraded your company. Ava and Harper, huh? Good for you. But I have to ask… how does it feel to be the DUFF?”
You blinked, finally looking up at him with confusion written all over your face. “What the fuck is a DUFF?”
 “Designated Ugly Fat Friend,” he said, as if it were the most obvious thing in the world. “Y'know, the one who makes their hotter friends look even better by comparison.”
For a moment, you were stunned into silence, processing the insult. It wasn’t just a casual dig; it was calculated, meant to hit where it hurt most. What the fuck was wrong with him?
“That’s…wow.”
Rafe chuckled, taking a swig of his beer. “Don’t take it so personally. It’s just a fact of life. Every group has a DUFF. Just figured you’d want to know your role.”
You stared at him, disbelief mixing with anger. “You’re seriously messed up, you know that?”
He shrugged, still smiling like this was all a game to him. “Just calling it like I see it.”
Your hand tightened around the cup in your hand. Before you could second-guess yourself, you flung the contents right into his face. The soda splashed across his perfectly styled long hair and down his designer shirt, leaving him momentarily stunned. The smirk vanished, replaced by a look of pure shock as the cold liquid dripped off his chin. The entire kitchen seemed to go silent for a moment as people nearby turned to see what had just happened.
Rafe blinked, his expression shifting from shock to something darker—anger, maybe, or disbelief that you’d actually had the nerve to do that. His jaw clenched, and for a split second, you thought he might actually retaliate.
But before he could say or do anything, you stepped closer, “Go fuck yourself.”
That was your last interaction for weeks.
He kept his distance, barely acknowledging you in class or around campus. It was almost as if the drink you threw in his face had washed away his relentless need to torment you. You couldn’t say you missed his attention, but the silence was unnerving in its own way. Knowing him, he could be brewing something much worse to fuck with your head. 
One afternoon, after a particularly tough class, you were gathering your things when you noticed Rafe hovering near the door. His usual cocky demeanor was gone, replaced by something almost...nervous. He caught your eye and hesitated before approaching as if debating whether to say something or just walk away.
“Hey,” he said, his voice uncharacteristically low.
You raised an eyebrow, surprised by the lack of smugness in his tone.
“What do you want?”
He shifted uncomfortably, glancing around to make sure no one was within earshot. “I, uh…I need your help.”
That was the last thing you expected to hear. You stopped packing your bag, staring at him in disbelief. “My help? With what?”
Rafe rubbed the back of his neck, clearly out of his element. “The exam. The one we had last week. I just got my grade back, and…uh, I failed. Hard. I don’t know what happened, but I need to do well in this class, and I’m completely fucked if I don’t turn things around. You seem to know your stuff, so…c-can you help me? I’ll make it worth your while.”
You couldn’t help but laugh, the irony of the situation not lost on you. 
“You must be out of your fucking mind,” you said, a hint of sarcasm in your voice. “I don’t want anything from you. Good luck failing.”
He looked almost panicked like he hadn’t expected you to turn him down so quickly. Surely, he knew you hated him with all your strength, right?
“Wait—Wait up! What about Nate Archibald?”
You froze, your mind racing. How the hell did he know about Nate? 
Your crush on the older guy was something you’d kept to yourself, shared only in passing with your girlfriends. But Rafe’s mention of it made your stomach drop.
“What about Archibald?” you asked, trying to keep your voice steady. You didn’t want to give him the satisfaction of knowing he’d rattled you.
He seemed to sense he was onto something, his desperation shifting into a more calculated expression. “Look, I know you like him. It’s not exactly a fucking secret okay? Even if you think it is. He’s a good guy I guess, but he doesn’t know you exist. You help me out, and I’ll help you get his attention. I can introduce you, get you in with his crowd.”
“I don’t like Nate.”
He rolled his eyes, “You were doodling his name on your notebook two weeks ago.”
Your stomach dropped at his words.
Two weeks ago, you had been sitting in the back of the lecture hall, barely paying attention to the professor as your mind drifted to Nate. You’d doodled his name absentmindedly, never imagining someone would notice, let alone remember. You were bored and you’d seen him earlier, arriving to school in his truck. He’d looked so dreamy it was all you thought about. 
“I wasn’t.”
“You were.”
“No?”
“Jesus. It’s a crush, relax.”
“You were spying on me?” you hissed, embarrassment creeping into your voice.
Rafe shook his head, his tone more exasperated than anything. “I wasn’t spying, all right? I just noticed.”
“You’re such a fucking creep.”
Your heart raced, both with anger and with the tiniest snippet of hope. The idea of Nate finally noticing you was tempting, but you hated that it was Rafe offering it to you, as if he could manipulate your feelings just like that. You knew better than to trust him. And yet, he seemed genuinely humbled—at least, as humbled as someone like him could be. He would’ve never asked you for help if the fear of failure wasn’t eating him alive. 
You narrowed your eyes, studying him closely. “Why should I believe you?”
He sighed, hands rubbing his face in frustration, “I just want to pass this stupid class, m’kay? I don’t give a fuck about Archibald, but if that’s what will get you to help me, I’ll do it.”
You hesitated, torn between wanting to tell him to go to hell and the small, persistent voice in your head that wondered if this could actually work in your favor. You’d worked so hard to keep your head down, to stay focused, but the idea of finally having a shot with someone like Nate was hard to ignore.
“You’re gonna make Nate notice a DUFF?”
Rafe's smirk returned, though it was less confident than usual, tinged with something almost vulnerable. “You’ve got potential.”
You bit the inside of your cheek, weighing your options. Part of you wanted to tell him to screw off, to take his offer and shove it up his ass. But the other part—the part that had spent sleepless nights wondering if you’d ever really fit in here, if you’d ever be more than just another face in the crowd—was tempted. Rafe was offering you a way in, a chance to break through the invisible barriers that had kept you on the outside looking in.
“Okay,” you said finally, the word slipping out before you could stop it. “I’ll help you, but don’t think for a second that I’m doing this shit for you. And if you screw me over, I swear, Rafe, I’ll kill you.”
He nodded, his expression serious. “Deal.”
Tumblr media
You and Rafe met up in the library for your first "study session."
The awkwardness was palpable. He was slouched in his chair, trying to act indifferent, but you could see the tension in his jaw as he stared at the textbook in front of him. He was flipping through a history textbook with a blank expression, as if the words on the page were written in latin.
"Alright," you began, flipping open your notebook. "Let's start with the basics, because clearly, you’re lost."
Rafe rolled his eyes but didn’t argue. One day they were going to get stuck inside his brain from how much he did it. He grunted in acknowledgment, though his attention didn’t lift from the page. 
You sighed and leaned forward, tapping on the open textbook in front of him, “We’re focusing on the economic factors that contributed to the development of plantation societies. You get that, right?”
He blinked, clearly not getting it. A perfect himbo.
“Okay, fine. The plantations needed a lot of labor. So, what’s the most cost-effective way to get that labor?”
Rafe shrugged. “Slaves?”
“Right, but it’s more complex than that,” you continued, trying to be patient. “The demand for crops like sugar and tobacco skyrocketed in Europe, so they needed cheap labor to maximize profits. That’s where the transatlantic slave trade comes in. It wasn’t just about the labor, it was about the entire economic system that developed around it.”
He nodded slowly, jotting down notes. “So, it’s like… the whole economy was built on this?”
“Exactly,” you said, a bit surprised he was actually paying attention. “And you need to understand how that impacted the societies, both in the Caribbean and in Europe. It’s not just about memorizing facts; it’s about understanding the connections.”
“Okay, I get it,” he muttered, though you could tell he was still struggling. “This shit’s more complicated than I thought.”
“If you don’t understand something, just ask. I’m not going to bite your head off.”
“Could’ve fooled me,” he smirked, but there was no malice in his tone this time.
“Anyway. This also reshaped societies on both sides of the Atlantic. The Caribbean, for instance, became a hub of sugar production, with plantations dominating the landscape. These plantations were brutal, with slaves working in horrific conditions. But they were also incredibly profitable, which is why they persisted for so long.”
He seemed to be processing this, his pen tapping rhythmically against the edge of his notebook. “And the people back in Europe…they were cool with this? Just letting it happen?”
His questions sounded like things children would ask but you answered, nonetheless. 
“It’s complicated,” you replied, flipping to a page in your textbook that showed a diagram of the triangular trade routes. “A lot of people in Europe didn’t really see the human cost. They were more concerned with the goods that were flooding their markets—sugar, tobacco, rum. These were luxury items that became everyday staples, and the average person didn’t really think about where they came from or who made them. But there were also abolitionists—people who fought against the slave trade and the conditions on the plantations. The system wasn’t unchallenged, but it was so entrenched in the economy that change was slow.”
Rafe leaned back in his chair, crossing his arms over his chest. “So, it’s all connected. The economy, the trade, the people—it’s all one big mess.”
A big mess is one way to put it simply. But at least he understood something. 
You smiled slightly, glad to see the gears turning in his head. 
“Exactly. And that’s what you need to understand for the weekly quizzes. It’s not just about memorizing dates and names—it’s about understanding the connections between these different factors and how they shaped the world we live in today.”
He nodded slowly, jotting down a few more notes. “Okay, I think I’m starting to get it. But I’m gonna need more help with the specifics—the names, the dates, all that stuff.”
“We can go over that next,” you offered, flipping to another section of the textbook. “But remember, it’s the big picture that matters. If you can understand how all these pieces fit together, the rest will come easier.”
He started improving. He was still far from a stellar student, but he wasn’t failing anymore. In return, he hadn’t forgotten his end of the deal.
One Friday afternoon, after another study session, Rafe leaned back in his chair, watching you pack your bag. “So, there’s this party tomorrow night.”
You looked up, narrowing your eyes. “And?”
“And you’re coming with me,” he said, as if it were the most obvious thing in the world.
You scoffed. “Why the hell would I do that?”
“Because you want Nate to notice you, right?” he said, crossing his arms. “Well, nothing makes a guy pay attention like seeing a girl with another guy. Especially one like me.”
Your eyebrows shot up. “You’re seriously suggesting we…what, pretend to be together?”
The thought almost made you gag. 
Rafe shrugged, a sly grin tugging at his lips. “Not exactly. Just, you know, make it look like we’re close. Guys love a little competition. Trust me, it’ll work.”
You hesitated, unsure. The idea of pretending to be close to Rafe, even for show, made your skin crawl. But the idea of finally getting Nate to notice you…that was tempting.
“And what exactly do you get out of this?” you asked, eyeing him suspiciously.
Rafe’s grin widened. “The satisfaction of a job well done. And maybe a little fun. You know you need to loosen up.”
You rolled your eyes. “Fine. But this better work.”
“It will,” Rafe said confidently. “Now, what are you planning on wearing?”
You frowned. “I haven’t really thought about it.”
Rafe stood up, slinging his bag over his shoulder. “Come on, then. We’re going shopping.”
You blinked, surprised. “What? No way. I can’t afford—”
“Relax,” he interrupted, already walking toward the door. “I’ve got it covered.”
You found yourself standing in a high-end boutique, completely out of your element. Rafe was rifling through racks of clothes, pulling out items and tossing them to you with a casual confidence that made you wonder just how often he did this.
“This,” he said, handing you a sleek black dress that was far more daring than anything you’d ever worn.
You looked at it skeptically. “I’m not sure that’s…me.”
“It’s not supposed to be you,” Rafe said, his tone leaving no room for argument. “You’re shorts and tank tops. This is supposed to be the girl Nate notices. Now go try it on.”
Reluctantly, you took the dress and headed to the dressing room. When you stepped out, Rafe’s eyes swept over you, and for the first time, you saw something almost like approval in his gaze.
“That’ll do,” he said, nodding. “But you need heels. And maybe some jewelry.”
This was so fucking weird it gave you chills. 
You stared at him, bewildered. “Since when are you an expert in women’s fashion?”
Rafe smirked. “I have two sisters. You pick things up.”
The next thing you knew, you were trying on shoes, adding accessories, and letting Rafe play stylist until he was satisfied. When you finally looked in the mirror, you hardly recognized yourself. The girl staring back at you was confident, poised, and yes, attractive. It was a version of yourself you’d never seen before.
“See?” Rafe said, appearing behind you in the mirror. “Told you I’d make this work.”
“Gee. Thanks.”
“You know what I meant.”
The party was in full swing when you arrived with Rafe. The music was loud, the lights dim, and the air filled with the buzz of chatter and laughter. You felt so nervous you felt like throwing up, clutching the small purse you’d brought with you like it was a lifeline. You could feel eyes on you, who were undoubtedly curious about the new girl in Rafe’s orbit.
Rafe, on the other hand, looked completely at ease, immediately falling into his element, greeting people with confidence and casual charm. He guided you through the crowd with a hand on the small of your back, leaning in close to whisper in your ear. “You look good, okay? All you have to do is enjoy yourself.”
You must’ve hit your head. Rafe Cameron was complimenting you. 
You took a deep breath, trying to follow his advice. You spotted Ava and Harper across the room, waving you over, but he stopped you before you could head their way. 
“Not yet,” he said, nodding toward the bar where Nate was standing with a group of friends. “Go talk to him.”
“Rafe—“
“Don’t whine.”
You swallowed hard, your heart pounding. “What do I even say?”
“Doesn’t matter,” Rafe replied smoothly. “Just be yourself. Well actually, maybe not.”
“Ouch.”
“Don’t forget—he needs to see that you’re with me. Let him come to you.”
You nodded, nerves jangling as you made your way toward the bar. Nate glanced up as you approached, and for a split second, his eyes widened in recognition. Does he remember you? Oh wow. You’d spoken to him twice by now, this being your third. 
“Hey,” you said, trying to keep your voice steady. “Mind if I grab a drink?”
“Sure,” Nate said, smiling as he moved aside. “I didn’t know you were coming tonight.”
“Last minute thing,” you replied, reaching for a cup. “Rafe dragged me along.”
Nate’s smile faltered slightly at the mention of Rafe, his eyes flicking over to where Rafe was leaning against the wall, watching the two of you with a casual, almost possessive air.
“Rafe, huh?” 
“Yeah,” you said, forcing a smile. “He’s not so bad, once you get to know him.”
Nate looked at you, really looked at you, for what felt like the first time. “You look…different tonight. In a good way.”
Your heart skipped a beat, warmth flooding your cheeks. “Thanks.”
Before the conversation could continue, to your dismay, Rafe appeared at your side, draping an arm around your shoulders, “Everything okay here?”
Nate’s eyes narrowed slightly, but he nodded. “Yeah, we’re good.”
“Cool,” Rafe said, giving Nate a pointed look. “Come on, let’s dance.”
Without waiting for a response, he led you away, leaving Nate watching after you, a contemplative expression on his face.
“What the hell?” you hissed, trying to pull away from his grip, but he held you firm, guiding you toward the makeshift dance floor.
“Relax,” he said, his voice low and smooth, as he spun you around to face him, “Trust me, it’s working. Did you see the way he was looking at you?”
You glared at him, your irritation simmering just beneath the surface.
“You didn’t have to drag me away like that.”
He shrugged, unfazed. “Had to keep him on his toes. Assholes like Archibald need to feel a little competition to make them realize what they could lose.”
“He’s not an asshole.”
“Sure.”
You opened your mouth to argue, but the words died on your lips as the music shifted to a slower beat, and his hand slid down to the small of your back, pulling you closer. You stiffened, but he kept his grip light, his eyes locked onto yours with an intensity that sent a shiver down your spine.
“Relax,” he repeated, his voice softer this time, almost…gentle. “Just go with it. You’re doing great.”
Your breath hitched, caught off guard by the sudden change in his demeanor. You hadn’t expected this—hadn’t expected him to be…well, not a complete asshole. 
“Watch the hands.”
He only dropped them lower.
“Or what?”
Your pulse quickened as Rafe's hands settled lower on your back, grazing the curve of your hips. His smirk was infuriating, but there was something beneath it—a challenge, a spark that dared you to react.
“Or I’ll step on your foot,” you shot back, narrowing your eyes.
He chuckled, the sound low and rich, as if he found your threat amusing. “You’d really ruin those expensive heels I bought you?”
You glanced down at the sleek stilettos, a reluctant grin tugging at the corner of your mouth. “You deserve it.”
“I probably do,” Rafe admitted, his voice taking on a more serious tone. His gaze locked onto yours again, and for a moment, it felt like the rest of the room faded away. 
The music, the people, even Nate—everything melted into the background until it was just the two of you. It felt weird. The way he looked at you was unsettling, like he was peeling back the layers you’d so carefully put up, seeing parts of you that you hadn’t intended to show him—or anyone.
You swallowed hard, trying to ignore the way your body was reacting to his proximity, to the warmth of his hands against your skin. This wasn’t supposed to happen.
You were here for Nate.
But Rafe wasn’t making it easy. He leaned in closer, his breath brushing against your ear as he whispered, “Ass face is looking.”
His lips were so close to you that you could feel the warmth of his lips. The scent of his cologne, a heady mix of cedar and something uniquely him, enveloped you, making it hard to focus.
"Stop calling him that," you whispered back, attempting to inject some irritation into your tone, but it came out softer than intended.
He chuckled, the sound sending a shiver down your spine. "Just calling it like I see it," he retorted, his fingers pressing lightly against the small of your back, guiding you even closer.
Well, fuck. 
"Is this really part of the plan?" you managed to ask, your voice barely audible over the music.
He smirked, his eyes never wavering. "Absolutely. Just giving the audience a good show."
"Audience?" You arched an eyebrow, momentarily confused.
He tilted his head subtly in Nate's direction. You followed his gaze to find Archibald staring. It was a look you'd never seen directed at you before.
"See? It's working," Rafe whispered, his lips brushing against the shell of your ear again. He had to be doing that shit on purpose, to get a rise out of you—it all felt too real, too intimate.
"You're enjoying this," you accused.
He grinned, unabashed. "Maybe a little. Aren't you?"
You were about to fire back a sharp retort, something to cut through the tension that had been building between you and Rafe, when you heard someone call your name. You turned your head, your heart still racing from how close Rafe was, only to see Ava and Harper pushing through the crowd toward you.
"Hey! We've been looking everywhere for you!" Ava exclaimed, her eyes flicking between you and Rafe, curiosity sparking in her. You never told them about him.
Harper raised an eyebrow, a sly expression spreading across her face. "And what do we have here? You two look cozy."
You stepped back quickly, putting some space between you and Rafe, feeling suddenly exposed. "Just... dancing," you said, trying to sound nonchalant.
Rafe, of course, didn’t miss a beat. He slipped his hands into his pockets, the picture of casual confidence. "Yeah, just giving her a little dance lesson. She’s a fast learner."
Ava glanced at you, suspicion plastered across her pretty face, “Uh-huh. Well, you ready to go? We were thinking of hitting up another party across town."
You hesitated, glancing at Rafe, who gave you a small nod, as if to say it was up to you. The moment between the two of you had been so intense, so confusing, that you almost forgot the entire reason you were there. Nate. You were supposed to be getting his attention, not getting caught up in whatever strange thing was happening with Rafe.
But now that your friends were here, the spell was broken. You felt more like yourself again, more grounded. "Yeah, let’s go," you said, finally pulling your eyes away from Rafe, “You’re not coming?”
“Nah. Have fun, I’ll see you on Monday, little pogue.”
As you walked away with Ava and Harper, you could feel his eyes on your back, and it took everything in you not to turn around. You weren’t sure what to make of it, or if you even wanted to. It was like you’d glimpsed a different side of him, one that wasn’t entirely awful. One that was strangely attractive. Maybe his ridiculous plan was working. But whether that was a good thing or not, you weren’t sure.
Tumblr media
Sure enough, another study session came around. The old tension between you two had settled into a strange kind of truce. It was more of a mutual agreement to tolerate each other for the sake of passing the course. Plus, despite everything, he was strangely good company when he wasn't being a complete ass.
Tonight was one of those rare moments when he wasn’t trying to get under your skin. The conversation had started out innocent enough—debating historical facts, making fun of the professor’s monotone voice—but then, somehow, it drifted towards relationships. Or more accurately, Nate.
“So, you gonna ask him out or what?” Rafe’s tone was casual, but his eyes were sharp as they flicked over to you.
You glanced at him, trying to gauge if he was genuinely interested or just trying to pry into your personal life for another round of teasing.
“Ask who out?”
“Nate. Mr. Perfect.” His smirk was playful, but there was an edge to it.
You rolled your eyes. “I’m not asking anyone out.”
“Why not?” He leaned back in his chair, arms crossed over his chest, clearly settling in for this conversation. “He’s obviously into you. You’re into him. What’s the problem?”
You looked away, focusing on the textbook in front of you, but the words blurred as your mind wandered. The truth was, you didn’t know how to answer that. You’d never been good with boys, especially not ones like Nate. Ones that seemed so far out of your league. 
“Just…not my thing,” you mumbled, hoping that would be enough to drop the subject.
But Rafe wasn’t one to let things go. “Not your thing? Or…you’ve never actually done it before?”
The casual tone of his question made your stomach flip. You looked at him sharply, searching his face for any sign that he was joking.
“Done what?”
“Kissed someone.” The words were out of his mouth before you could even process them, and your heart skipped a beat. 
You knew you should deny it, brush it off with a joke, but the way he was looking at you, so intently, made it impossible to lie. Silence stretched between you, and you could practically see the gears turning in his head as realization dawned. 
“No way. You’ve never…?”
You felt heat rise to your cheeks, embarrassment flooding through you. “It’s not a big deal, okay? Can we drop it?”
But he was looking at you like you’d just told him the earth was flat.
“You’ve never kissed anyone?” He sounded incredulous, like he couldn’t believe it was even possible.
“Seriously, shut up,” you snapped, but it only made him smile harder.
He shook his head, still looking at you like you were some kind of anomaly. “How the hell did you get through high school without—”
“Rafe!”
“Okay, okay, m'sorry!” He held up his hands in mock surrender, but there was a mischievous glint in his eyes that made you nervous. “But seriously, you’ve never kissed anyone? Not even a peck?”
“No,” you admitted, crossing your arms defensively. “And I don’t see how it’s any of your business.”
He was quiet for a moment, and you could feel his gaze on you, intense and considering. Finally, he leaned forward, his expression more serious than you’d ever seen it. “Alright then. I’ll teach you.”
Your jaw dropped, and you stared at him like he’d lost his mind.
“What?”
“I’ll teach you,” he repeated, like it was the most logical thing in the world. “Better to learn from someone who knows what they’re doing, right?”
You blinked, trying to wrap your head around what he was suggesting. “Are you out of your fucking mind? There’s no way I’m letting you—”
“Why not?” He was leaning in closer now, that stupid cocky smirk back on his face. “I promise I won’t bite.”
You could feel your pulse quicken, nerves fluttering in your stomach. This was Rafe Cameron, the guy who had made your life hell for years, and now he was offering to…what? Teach you how to kiss? It was absurd. Ridiculous. And yet, there was something in his eyes, something that almost made you say yes.
“No,” you finally said, shaking your head. “This is insane.”
He shrugged, leaning back again, but you could tell he wasn’t giving up. “Just think about it. No pressure.”
You wanted to argue, to tell him he was crazy, but the truth was, part of you was curious. Curious about what it would be like. Curious about why he was offering in the first place. But that was a thought for another time. For now, you needed to focus on getting through this study session without letting him distract you any further.
Easier said than done.
You tried to shake off the bizarre turn the conversation had taken, focusing back on the textbook in front of you, but the words on the page refused to stick. You could feel his stupid blue eyes on you, his presence more distracting than ever.
“Come on, don’t make it weird,” he said after a moment, his tone light but his gaze still fixed on you. “I was just fucking with you.”
You let out a breath you didn’t realize you’d been holding, relieved that he was backing off. “Good. Because that was the weirdest thing you’ve ever said to me.”
He chuckled, the tension easing just a little. “Weird, maybe. But not the worst idea.”
“Rafe,” you warned, but there was no real bite in your voice. He had a way of disarming you, breaking through your defenses in a way that no one else could. It was annoying.
“Okay, okay, I’ll stop,” he said, holding up his hands again. But there was still a playful glint in his eyes, like he was enjoying this far too much.
You tried to focus on the study guide, pointing out a key term that you both needed to memorize, but your mind kept drifting back to what he’d said. The idea of him teaching you how to kiss was ridiculous—completely absurd—but there was a tiny, traitorous part of you that wondered what it would be like.
“You’re thinking about it,” Rafe said suddenly, his voice breaking through your thoughts.
“No, I’m not!” You replied a little too quickly, your cheeks burning. He grinned, clearly enjoying your discomfort.
“Yes, you are. I can see it on your face.”
You glared at him, hoping to shut him up with a look, but he just laughed, the sound low and teasing. “You know, if you’re curious, there’s no harm in trying it.”
You shook your head, trying to keep your voice steady. “I’m not curious, and I’m definitely not going to let you—”
Before you could finish your sentence, he leaned in, closing the distance between you in a way that made your breath catch. He didn’t kiss you, but he was close enough that you could feel the warmth of his breath on your lips, the intensity of his eyes making your heart race.
“You sure about that?” he murmured, his voice soft but filled with a challenge.
You swallowed hard, your mind screaming at you to push him away, but your body refused to move. There was something magnetic about him, something that made it impossible to look away, to even think about anything else.
“I…” you started, but the words died in your throat as he leaned in just a fraction closer, his eyes never leaving yours.
“Just one lesson,” he whispered, his lips hovering just above yours. “Then we can pretend it never happened.”
Your heart was pounding in your chest, a thousand thoughts racing through your mind, but none of them made sense. All you could think about was how close he was, how badly you wanted to know what it would feel like to close that final distance.
But then, as if a switch flipped in your brain, reality crashed down on you. This was Rafe Cameron. The guy who had tormented you, who was probably doing this just to mess with you. You couldn’t let yourself fall into his trap.
“No,” you said, finally finding your voice and pushing him back gently. “This is crazy.”
He didn’t move at first, his eyes searching yours for a moment longer before he finally leaned back, giving you space to breathe again. “Fair enough,” he said, his tone still light, but there was something in his expression that you couldn’t quite read. “But if you change your mind…”
“I won’t,” you said quickly, needing to put some distance between you and the tension that was still thick in the air. “Let’s just get back to studying.”
He gave you a long look, like he was deciding whether to push the issue, but then he just shrugged and turned back to his notes. 
“Whatever you say.”
You nodded, trying to focus on the study guide in front of you, but your mind was still reeling. You couldn’t believe what had just happened, couldn’t believe that you had actually considered letting Rafe teach you how to kiss. It was insane. 
Completely and utterly insane.
The rest of the study session passed in a blur, the usual banter between you and Rafe feeling a bit more strained, a bit more loaded than before. You were hyper-aware of every move he made, every glance he threw your way, but thankfully, he seemed to have dropped the subject for now.
But as you packed up your things to leave, you couldn’t shake the feeling that something had shifted between you. You couldn’t tell if it was for better or worse, but one thing was certain—you were never going to look at Rafe Cameron the same way again.
The following days were a strange dance of avoidance and unspoken tension. Lots of it. You and Rafe still studied together, but there was an unspoken agreement not to mention what had happened. It was as if you were both trying to pretend that nothing had changed, even though you both knew it had.
It didn’t help that every time you were around him, you couldn’t stop thinking about that moment—the way he’d leaned in, the way his breath had felt against your lips. How soft they looked. It was infuriating, the way your mind kept circling back to it, refusing to let it go. You were better than this. 
“Hey,” he greeted, sitting down next to you without his usual swagger. “You okay?”
The question caught you off guard, and you hesitated before answering. “Yeah, why wouldn’t I be?”
He shrugged, looking out at the entrance of the classroom for a moment before turning back to you. “I don’t know. You’ve just been kind of…quiet lately.”
You looked at him, searching his face for any hint of teasing, but he seemed genuine. “Just had a lot on my mind.”
Rafe nodded, as if he understood, and for a moment, the two of you sat in a surprisingly comfortable silence. It was strange, this version of him—so different from the one who had taunted you about kissing just days ago.
Finally, he broke the silence. “Y’know, I wasn’t trying to mess with you the other day. I mean, I was, but not…not in a bad way.”
You raised an eyebrow, not sure where he was going with this. “Rafe, I know you like to mess with people. It’s kind of your thing.”
“Yeah, well,” he said, rubbing the back of his neck awkwardly, “I guess I just didn’t want you to think I was trying to make fun of you or anything. I just thought…you deserved better.”
That caught you completely off guard. “What do you mean?”
He sighed, looking uncharacteristically serious. “I mean, you deserve to experience that stuff with someone who actually gives a shit about you. Not with some random guy at a party or something. I guess I didn’t like the idea of you feeling…left out.”
Was he…implying that you two were friends now? That he cared?
You stared at him, not sure what to say. This was a side of Rafe you’d never seen before—vulnerable, even a little protective. It was jarring, but not in a bad way.
“Thanks,” you said softly, not quite sure how to respond. “That's weirdly nice of you to say.”
He smiled, and for the first time in a long time, it didn’t have that usual hint of arrogance. “Don’t get used to it,” he teased lightly, and you couldn’t help but laugh.
Just then, the rest of your classmates showed up, breaking the moment. 
Rafe stood up, his usual confident demeanor slipping back into place as he greeted his friends. But as you watched him joke around with the others, you couldn’t help but feel like you’d just seen a glimpse of the real Rafe—someone who cared, even if he didn’t always show it.
And you found yourself liking this version of him. 
A lot.
More than you should.
1K notes · View notes