#the king of dorks

[moonriase]

it’s metha humor-i’ll show myself out

[emmastraub3]

The Queen and King of Arendelle I love how they are so in love and very dorky.

[anextrapart]

one day mel king and jack abbot will try to high-five each other and their collective lack of swag (affectionate) will result in matching facial contusions

[technically-human]

The cat queen…?

The Cat Queen

ko-fi

[ittybittyluci]

So y’all remember this scene right?

From Helluva Boss S2 E7? When Mammon threatened Ozzie. And how EVERYONE was freaking out and so scared cuz they though Asmodeus was gonna get in trouble for his relationship,

But, now I’m looking back and I’m like… why IS he gonna regret it. He’ll get public backlash sure, but eventually everyone’s gonna have to get over it. He’s a Sin. He’s the main sex toy manufacturer in Hell. I don’t think ppl are gonna care enough to boycott. They’re too desperate.

The only people that outrank him are the royal family. And like… in all actuality, who’s gonna get mad at him?

This bitch?!

Please!

[durgewyll]

Wyll: There're tales galore of a great green dragon called Claugiyliamatar. Try saying that five times in a row!

Wyll: 'Claugiyliamatar'. 'Clog-ee-myalarfer'. 'Cloff-a-mother-f...' Whatever - let's call it Old Gnawbone.

devnote: CLOG-ee-lee-uh-MAT-ar. Wyll tries his own game to say the dragon's name five times in a row and fails spectacularly and charmingly.

[bb-eb-db-bb-eb-b-ab-f-b-ab]

LMAOOOO I CAN’T WITH THESE LOSERS THEY REALLY HAD EZRAN LIKE

[fullscoreshenanigans]

Me whenever I remember the English dub canonically has Norman and Ray calling each other dumbasses. <3

[ventriloquistfan69]

Another one of these I made at work. I've made more than I've shown on my blog

Audio source

[a-non-event]

Bonus Mitch because he looks insanely hot in that shirt:

[abutterflyscribbles]

Broken Hearts in the Emergency Room

Marianne leaned back in her chair and considered the off-white ceiling panels of the emergency room waiting area. She considered the throbbing pain in her knuckles and how long it would take for the doctor to see her with so many patients it was standing room only. She considered how her hand had not hurt this much when she punched Roland. She considered the irony of the bloody tear on her knuckles being in the shape of heart.

Yes, all things considered, this was the second worst Valentines Day of her life.

"I really hope you didn't break your hand this time." Dawn fussed, wrapping a towel around a fresh bag of frozen peas and putting it on Marianne's hand. Marianne just grunted. Dawn continued, raising her voice in a pointed manner, "And I really hope you didn't break his cheekbone!"

There was another grunt. This one came from the seat next to Marianne. A pair of long legs uncrossed and recrossed.

"He's not even bleeding." Marianne mumbled.

"He can't see out of his right eye, it's so swollen!" Dawn said. She produced a bag of frozen corn, apparently having run out of peas, and offered it to the owner of the swollen eye. "It's such a shame, too," Dawn said, "He's got such lovely eyes and cheekbones."

The owner of the swollen eye and long legs was overcome with a coughing fit, having apparently choked when a gasp disrupted his breathing. Recovering, he pressed the corn to his face and groaned.

Marianne slid down in her seat and occupied herself with pressing the bones in the back of her hands to see if any were noticeably out of place.

"Are you okay, Boggy?" Dawn asked.

"Bog." Their seatmate mumbled. "'M fine."

Bog was not fine.

His face had been smashed to pieces and it was no doubt the fragments of his skull responsible for the stabbing pains around his eye. He wished he'd never left the house that day. He wished he hadn't let himself be talked into grabbed a drink with his coworkers. He wished he hadn't caught the eye of the fluffy-haired little blonde girl decked out in glitter and hearts. He especially wished he hadn't been so aggressively, loudly rude in response to her flirting because that had summoned a blood-thirsty sister who had taken umbrage with his attitude and taken a swing at his face.

The blonde--Dawn--had been so sweetly apologetic about her sister that Bog felt embarrassed and ashamed for being so rude, but the sister--Marianne--was so angry and sullen that Bog was forced into retaliatory grumpiness and was finding it hard to apologize. Anyway, he was ultimately the injured party and should be extended an apology first.

"What kind of name is 'Bog' anyway." Marianne muttered.

A spike of annoyance pierced through Bog's embarrassment. "Oh, don't even start!" He said. "And if you must then at least don't take such a cheap shot. I've heard it all."

"Bog body?" Marianne persisted, challenged.

"In high school. Daily."

"Bog of Eternal Stench?"

"I've lost count."

"Spider-infested cranberry bog?"

"Endless variations."

"Do you write a lot of posts online--"

"All bog/blog puns have been exhausted."

Marianne fell into a thoughtful silence, stumped for the moment. Bog took the opening. He said, "If I hadn't been slouching would I have a chest injury instead of a black eye?"

"I am not short!" Marianne said instantly, "You're just some sort of ambulatory redwood!"

"You being short and him being tall can both be true." Dawn said with the air of a mediator maintaining fairness in this exchange.

"For a moment I thought a wee winged fairy was fluttering up to take a poke at me." Bog said, sensing weakness and seized on it.

Marianne fired back. She said, "I wonder if your black eye wasn't a per-existing injury from smacking your face on door frames!"

"I choose to overlook that remark."

"Because you're the bigger person?"

"I try not to let these little things get me down."

"It's amazing how such a tall guy can be so low."

"They say tiny things are cute but I guess the exception proves the rule."

"You're both pretty cute." Dawn said brightly. "Now break and go back to your corners."

Bog realized he was nearly nose-to-nose with Marianne, having leaned forward to better utilize his glare. It was not being as effective as usual. His face, already flushed with anger, still managed to raise the heat a degree or two before he collected himself and slouched back down in his seat, focusing on the renewed throbbing around his eye.

Marianne frowned ferociously and did not dwell on how bright blue Bog's eyes were in such a heavy-browed face. Instead she thought about how the peas were getting squishy.

Dawn snapped a picture of Bog.

Bog bit back an angry protest and tried to deliver a calm inquiry about why she had decided to document his face.

Dawn smiled. "Your bruise looks kind of like a heart! Besides, we should keep a record of your injury, just in case. Don't worry, I won't show it to anyone!"

"Oh . . . kaaaay." Bog sighed.

"Not until the wedding reception, anyway," Dawn murmured.

"What?" Bog asked.

"Huh?" Marianne said.

Dawn added a glitter filter to the picture she had taken of Bog and Marianne's blushing profiles. "Nothing!" she said, thinking that this Valentines wasn't so bad even if she had to cancel her date with Hadrian. She could not wait to tell Sunny all about this.

[fangsandfeels]

Astarion and planning in a nutshell:

[sopping-wet-cat-wizard]

4 dorks and the differences in their kisses!

(source) (@pen--anon)

In no particular order, snippets of each pair kissing!

💜sophvern🩷

As Sophist shuffled around the corner, he froze the moment he saw Vernias clutching the letter the older one had written. Where the hell did he find that?!

"Vern, you weren't supposed to—"

In the time it took the words to leave Sophist's mouth, Vernias had already crossed the room and practically tackled the other, pressing a strong yet chaste kiss against his lips. "I like you too!" he beamed.

🧡tcvern3🩷

"Nick! Stop putting my stuff on the top shelf!" Vernias yelled at the other man in the kitchen.

Nick snickered. "Or what? You gonna come up here?"

In an instant, Vern whipped around, yanked Nick down by the front of his shirt, and planted a frustrated kiss right smack against his lips. "Or I'll drag you down where you belong!" he nearly yelled after pulling away.

🧡tcking3💚

"Dammit, Brent! I'm trying to say I have feelings for you!" Nick practically screamed across the room, causing the other's eyes to widen.

"Oh." Curiously, Brent approaches Nick with an unreadable expression. Only after Nick registers a warmth on his cheek and Brent's face pulling back does he realize he's been kissed. "That's good."

🧡tcsoph3💜

Sophist couldn't help but smirk as Nick looked like he wanted to murder the other. "Honestly, Nick, I was just trying to have a friendly debate over whether water was wet, and you're not even—"

The words swiftly cut as Sophist found himself with his back pressed against the wall and Nick's lips smashed against his own, knocking all of the words out of his head.

Only when Nick pulled away did Sophist remember how to open his eyes. He was greeted with the sight of an irritated Nick. "Shut the fuck up, Eevee."

💚king of soph💜

"Eevee?"

"Yeah?"

"Have you ever kissed someone?"

"No. Why?"

"Me either. Everyone says it's good, though. Can I see?"

The two spend the next minute kissing. Sophist spends the five minutes after seeing stars while Brent brushes his teeth casually.

💚king of vern🩷

After Vernias finishes wrapping the wound, he nods approvingly at his own work. "Now, make sure not to get it wet, and tell me if it starts bleeding though, again."

Brent nods along with Vernias words. "Thanks for that. Anything else?"

Vernias pecks the injured hand with his lips before nodding approvingly once more. "That should do it."

Brent laughs. "Thanks, nurse Vernias."

[jrueships]

can they fuck

[sauron-the-sexy]

Bronwyn: "Is it true? Are you the king we were promised?"

"Yes."

Bronwyn: "All hail!"

Míriel: "All hail to the true King of the Southlands!"

"Call me King Excellent."

[class-of-classics-blog]

Its currently 2 AM and im thinking.... about... Goldilockes and king charming.... and Queen charming.... BUT ITS NOT WHAT YOU THINK

OKEY SO IN ONE OF MANY UNIVERSES King Charming broke things off with goldilockes so that he can get with queen charming. And i've been thinking how in these situations you usually get girl vs girl over a gay BUT WHAT IF as revenge for leaving her (im gonna sprinkel a little bit of drama here and im gonna make it the most heartbreaking and humiliating break up) Goldielockes starts flirting with queen charming bc as the saying goes "only woman knows how to treat a woman right"

Imagine being in king charming position, you broke up with commoner so you can be with princess and now your ex is rizzing up your (almost) gf