#the hike from hell
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the hike actually kills me because what cassian put nesta through would make literally anyone have a mental breakdown and when she inevitably does he’s like “wow…i finally got through to her…she’s telling me how she feels…she truly trusts me now…it’s because we’re mates…” dude it is not because she feels safe with you it is because you pushed her beyond her physical limits for days on end while alternating between the silent treatment and barking orders at her. “she’s crying because the healing powers of the magic mountain finally got through to her” she’s crying because you forced her through navy seal training.
#the hike is not something you do to someone you love sorry#the hike acosf#the hike from hell#the hike#acosf critical#anti cassian#anti nessian#anti acosf
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they tried to rebrand as The Criminals but riz is literally the city council's treasurer and also turns out people in their late 20s don't really name their friend groups. so now they're The Intrepid Heroes
#fantasy high#figueroth faeth#kristen applebees#adaine abernant#gorgug thistlespring#fabian seacaster#riz gukgak#yes this is sorta from the same thing Ive been doing for future!riz lol. that riz is the same design basically#just the above board sona#u can kiiinda tell which of the bad kids I have a very clear vision for their future design and which I kinda wing it for lol#kristen's tank top is white and the coat is galaxy tie dye btw. I didnt have the energy to express that in ink but thats the ult version#adaine I truly imagine to grow up to be the perpetual t shirt and jeans person but she carries her sword everywhere#gorgugs truth is that shes just hot she can wear anything. but I do give him the skirt hike bc I love him#I really like skirt hike... such a fun thing to put in designs. if ur garment has no variance in how it falls or drapes u can do it urself#this is also a little bit of an exercise in how much of an accessory I can freehand from memory#fig's bass I straight up did not fact check for. just rawdogging it memory only. same with fandrangor and adaine's crocs#I did write in my funny little document that gorgug takes up baking and is good at it bc I think itd be good for him#to do basically chemistry and math that also feeds people#out of them... kristen and riz would be Good good at it. but riz would get way too stressed abt the recipe and kristen bakes by#eyeballing the texture. fabian likes decorating but refuses to get anywhere near the heat of an oven. adaine isnt good at it first try#and is like well my effort goes to other things actually. fig Loves baking and Nobody lets her into the kitchen#idk why this manifests so clear in my head. must be bc of recent foccacia events#living in the subtropics is hell for baking nobody try it ok? I tell u
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it's hell on earth to be heavenly them's the breaks, they don't come gently
#daniel ricciardo#dr3#went on a hike the sunday after the official announcement and listened to this song on repeat for probably 3 of the 8 miles#POV: me in the middle of the woods telling myself to get it together#while crying about a 35 year old millionaire before I end up passing someone on the trail and they call the police on me#so song is about how female stars are treated overtime and when they first arrive they're praised for being authentic and refreshin#but once the shine wears off and they're a little older and reveal imperfections or they struggle they become a target for ridicule#and then they're discarded for the next new thing in town and the cycle keeps repeating itself forever#which to me so closely mirrors daniel's trajectory in F1 in the eyes of the media#but also when you take the lyrics at face value they are just so daniel...#the f1 ecosystem and more specifically the redbull “family” are fake as hell#and yet daniel is one of their most genuine products who actually can't be easily reproduced (but by god they'll try)#he showed a great deal of promise despite coming from a place that really never should've produced a successful f1 driver#because the cards were stacked against him and nobody really thought he would make it#but he did and he gave us 13 brilliant years (and he has SO much more to give and do and succeed at and he will)#but the wheel of time keeps spinning and the cycle continues for the next shiny new toy that they can nurture and then destroy#anyway i'm not totally in love with these gifs but I need to be done w/them and I had to exorcise this demon that was making me sad
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Thank you for five years of service to our faithful purple line harness. Our most used harness, and the only harness we've owned I have absolutely zero complaints about in any way.
Hopefully your successor can live up to the standard you've set!
#I remember being all giddy when i bought it#my first harness for my first dog#felt like a milestone when Røst was finally big enough for a grown up harness#and me realising i wasn't a kid staring longingly at the dog gear in the pet shop anymore#(Then promptly turned into a gear hoarder but we won't talk about that)#the NS line harness is for sure a forever favourite for me#it sits so nicely on the dog#doesn't slide around#freedom of movement and it's the only harness aside from the Freemotion that Røst doesn't wheeze in when pulling#i've also put our old one through absolute hell the last four years#hiking ragged rocks. swimming in both fresh and salt water. wallowing in mud. sharp snow and biting cold#and it still looks as new#just about spotless#fingers crossed the new model is made as well as the old because this harness would outlive Røst by a decade
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Jonathan having a "running effort" because he's in the body of a forty something with a 0 body maintenance routine. It was easier running across the Carpathian wolf mountains.
JONATHAN: Why do I have a stitch each time I wake? Why am I so out of breath? What manner of dreadful Thrall have we fought this time, Ms Townsend?
MADDIE: Mr Larkin fought a vaguely steep hill about twenty minutes ago. I think the hill won.
#the holmwood foundation#the holmwood foundation podcast#In defence of Jeremy#He never anticipated The Hike From Hell#And he is currently in very unsuitable office shoes#Jeremy Larkin#Jonathan Harker#maddie townsend
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I'm realizing that if I lived in Exandria I would be a devoted follower of the Wildmother. Even if I prayed to her every day and she never answered me in a direct way and never gave me magic powers. How is that any different from the life I'm living now? Sometimes I think about mountains too much and I start crying. If I go two weeks without hiking my soul starts to shrivel up. If there was a sentient incredibly powerful being who protects the natural world and permits me to experience it? She's my best friend. Oh she doesn't care about me and if I live or die? No shit, that's why I carry a first aid kit and a sat phone. She destroyed a city? Yeah that happens some times and it's awful; I'm still glad that storms and fire and oceans exist. Oh, it was a city that intended to kill her? Wish we could get that kind of justice on planet earth. You want to release a being that will kill the goddess who made the mountains? That's my mom and I will tear your throat out with my teeth before I let you touch her!
#i was turning over orym's vision from the wildmother in my head yesterday (as i was hiking)#when she shows him the expanse of mountains and valleys and forests and he feels unconditional love from her????#EXCUSE ME?#that's how nature makes ME feel and gods aren't even real#If I knew there was someone to thank? I'd thank her every single day#and yeah even her flaws. even killing people on purpose who don't deserve it. I'd love her so much that those things couldn't stop me.#critical role#campaign 3#bells hells#the wildmother
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ok so canadian postage stamp prices inflated by an exorbitant amount so quickly that the stamps i bought mere months ago are already out of date and i now have to pay extra on those stamps if i want them to mail out at all. which is such bullshit if i'm being so honest. i've already paid for those stamps. it was from ONLY A FEW MONTHS AGO.
#emieclat#if i already paid for it they should just let me use it.#not mad at the post office ppl because they are really nice and cool#but what the hell man#'exorbitant' is comparative#the last price hike was from (using american stamps for example) 1.30 to 1.40#and now it's 1.75?#and international stamps went from 2.71 to 3.65??#what the hell mannnnnn#oh noooo the knives out prints i sent out last week#NOOOO#the post office ppl told me letters with old stamps are either returned to sender or tossed out#and since i don't put return address on my letters they might get thrown out#OKAY. okay. it seems like the price increase only went into effect this monday#and the knives out stuff were sent on sunday before it#so hopefully.......they'll be okay#and the letter i sent after that is domestic so they shouldn't note the price discrepancy#IF YOU BOUGHT A KNIVES OUT PRINT FROM ME LAST WEEK AND THEY DON'T ARRIVE BY FEBRUARY 12 PLEASE LET ME KNOWWWW
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just a few little bits from the past few days
#both the word count screenshots are from the same day - just different sections of the text. so that was like 4000 words in#one DAY.. huzzah!! (< making up for the fact that I did 0 words the 3 days before that lol.. so its not actually an accomplishment ghjjh)#In renpy I think you can have multiple separate texty cody whatever documents and still jump between them so long as they;re#labeled properly. Rather than like... having one extremely long 60.000 line file where in some places youre in a menu within a menu#within a menu within a menu within a menu within a menu within a menu jhbhj#But that was the way I started doing it lke 5 years ago when I actually made the base of everything so I feel like it'd be too much#work to change it all that dramatically now. But that means I cant just get the word count for the whole document I just have#to jump around to the few sections I worked on and highlight them to get the word count for only that portion#.. the one tiny fraction of the whole monster text wall. Though it is of course spaced out and organized into#clearly labeled sections within that because otherwise I have trouble discerning text on a screen. still.#Resuming a project that's been basically abandoned for 4-5 ish years is just always finding weird stuff like.. why did I do this that way..#why did I write that... why did I organize that in this manner... what the hell am I referencing in this note... etc. lol#Anyway... also......................cat with plum on his head.#everyone point and laugh at mr. plum head boy..!!!!!!!!!!!!! >:3c#I've been obsessed with Calico Critters' social media presence from afar (like how I mentioned one of my possible dream jobs would#be to be the person that sets the scenes and arranges all the toy animals at a tiny little table and etc. to take the type of pictures they#post on their facebook page and stuff) and I see all their photos of them posing the rabbits as if they're in a swimming pool#or on a nature hike or etc. etc. BUT I have never really seen them in person. Recently I was at a store (in a KN95 mask and not staying#very long still of course. wastewater covid levels are still high where I live (and most of the US truly)) and it just crossed my mind#to actually go to the toy section and see if I could find any....wow.... Its like meeting a celebrity.. the Latte Cats....#Of course I didnt buy them because they're like... very expensive?? like $25 - $40 just for one little pack of a few critters like#what is shown. but.... I still got to see them................ my beloved.. I want their outfits... T o T#Oh and then lastly just a pot of purple clover looking things. I just think theyre neat lol#photo diary
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ngl gamers, I think I'm gonna inevitably lose to the hormones and depression in the near future XD
Can't bring myself to be active cause I'm using a lot of energy to not vent post all the time. But fuck it, into the tags I go!
#I want NO MESSAGES regarding this. let me just be upset and alone#you spend most of your life trying to not succumb to sick brain but honestly I don't think it's worth it in the long run#my life is for better or worse....decent. but I've lost the drive and happiness to really DO anything a long time ago. like whats the point#the only reason I havent killed myself yet is cause Im too lazy (and dont have access to a gun for a quick getaway)#and I'm saying all this DESPITE having stuff to look forward to in the near future. it's like AUGH whats the POINT IM always gonna suffer#why does mental health take such a toll on ppl. this shit sucks ass. and I still feel excited for things in the future too? somehow?#but I also really want to die so. idk man. idk. maybe if I fall in love with someone then I can be distracted but all my walls are up#what's the point in anything anymore. *I* have to take the steps to improve myself and my situation#and I'd rather die. anyways who wants to make a pact that once we reach 40 we will marry each other#that might be fun#also my brain has gotten so bad that I am literally considering joining a hiking club to get out more and I FUCKING HATE HIKING#but I should probably do something out of my comfort zone to push myself and who knows maybe I will find a new passion#but let me tell you about the anxiety - oh BOY it's starting to act up again. hahahha#ah well sometimes you just need to scream your feelings out in the tags to get a lil clarity from the brain fog#one day I will fucking die/kill myself but for now I'll just try to make the best out of. whatever the hell this stupid life is. *shrug*#(but hey if any professional hitmen are reading this. feel free to. heh. you know ;) )#also I need to get back to art#gotta do my paid work and that one pic I lined months ago. and clay stuff *continues to bed rot another week because hahahahahahaha*#ah I wish I didn't fail all those years ago. then I would be free. I wish I was free#ok goodnight I promised myself that I would do paid work when I wake up tomorrow so hopefully no more migraines -pray emoji-
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webby would have LOVED mystery flesh pit national park
#my funky guys#shed be sooo fascinated w it#shed be pissed about the comercialisation of it n shit BUT. at the same time if she could take a hike in there?#she would. 100%. and shed be having a blast tge whole time#like. shed have a love hate relationship w the whole national park thing and how irresponsible the whole situation was#bc it WAS shitty and sketchy as hell#but on the other hand she just really really loves the idea of being able to walk around the insides of a colossal beast#so shed be like 'ofc nobody should be allowed to fuck around in there like that wtf dude thats so dangerous and irresponsible#.except for me. they should let ME fuck around!!! fuck the corporation and tourists i would treat her right!!!!!!#*I* would be careful and wouldnt exploit the resources and keep distance from the fauna unlike SOME PEOPLE'#ok well. i mean weblums exist so i suppose she COULD walk around the insides of a giant organism#but still the mystery flesh pit has that certain allure. a vibe. weblums are cool as hell but theyre not an eldritch underground horror#weblums are cool space whales but the mystery flesh pit is .well the mystery flesh pit. cant rlly compete w that#anyway. the pit may be a deatrap but not for her. shed survive. shes special like that the giant lobsters wouldnt eat HER#also webby would be very much on the pits side. its not ITS fault people are stupid?? its just chilling!!! its not evil!!!!!!#'ohh but those arthropods are scary!!! WELL. theyre WILD ANIMALS DIPSHIT ofc theyre hostile. and plus theyre cool as hell'
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this is the bridge that aiden hiked to see btw
i think if i hiked for six hours and i was met with this at the end i would leave and do something evil at a waffle house
#when my family went to yellowstone and we hiked up to grand prismatic i almost killed someone for real#i can't imagine being put through hell for this#ask#my papaw is banned from the waffle house i'd be carrying on the legacy#also just remembered after we got down from grand prismatic my 3 y/o cousin peed in the parking lot while his mom was holding him#like a wet cat
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Fascinating to learn a new skill and feel the ways it makes your brain work in new ways
#personal#actually finally learning to draw and its wild to be able to look at things from that perspective#find the proper angle of a line to be congruent with the rest is KIND OF like putting together a good sentence#but weirdly more three dimensional feeling#theres some math problem that creates a self contained twisting orb/blob thing#cant remember what the hell its called but drawing feels like that#as compared to writing is like hiking#i dunno. im very tired
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#tag talk#reasons I skedaddled from the relationship a a week after joining:#I only liked one out of two. I would have totally been friends with the one I liked. just not the other one. and you can't pick just one#the annoying one called sex “the horny” and I wanted to nope the hell out of there#I tried to build emotional distance by talking about how I was leaving at the end of the year and got told "#got told 'I'll still care about you even after you're gone' which like...#I react so so poorly to people who care so much they overstep my emotional boundaries#that's like. lowkey a trigger for me. I showed off my scars and they reacted with sympathy.#sympathy over my sick-ass scars that I'm proud of. I was like 'aren't these cool?' and they reacted with sympathy. no thanks#once again.. I like men. it was an experiment but I'm done. I wanted to see what it was like and I got my taste#they go on the list of people I've had sex with only once. because I usually do not go back for a second time with people#there was a chance I could have gotten one of them to play aoe with me that's the only potential benefit I could have gotten from them#otherwise nothing I wanted. they weren't good hiking pals. not good skating buddies. lame taste in movies.#the annoying one talked about wanting to be a sugar mommy which I should have seen as another un-vibe data point#cause I don't vibe with overly generous caring people either#tbh I'd rather be hated than simped over. I can't stand cloying overbearing kindness#people like that so often act as if their kindness entitles them to you and I just.. ugh. emotional blockages in place#it switched me back to L and now I'm he him pronouns again#and lowkey I think when we move I'm gonna cut our hair. I miss it short. we made a really cute guy.#being called miss and ma'am is fine and all but damn I miss being a cute boy#anyway. my life continues to be tumultuous and it's my own damn fault. I regret nothing but I will learn from this experience
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Shout-out to everyone who survived a "fun" easter with the family
#fucking hell#it started with finding out my dad smoked in my car when I picked up my sister#who was equally dreading the day#my mum turns into the world's tensest and judgemental presence. worsened by my aunt#then hell for autistic people (of which there are multiple present)#multiple deaf people means one uninspired conversation that isn't interesting in any way.#combinations of passive aggressiveness and people not saying a thing because they can't participate. voice volumes too damn high#weirdass food situations. Very full table. so many smells.#this goes on for over an hour. wishing for literally anything but being there. soul crushing.#then you still have to sit in that room for 2.5 hours. it just goes on and on.#my autistic deaf dad physically looks like how I feel. my mum and aunt keep piling on top of him to demand his mental presence#i leave the room once (to get my phone to show pictures to my uncle) and am immediately followed upstairs by my mum#who demands I don't leave the room (What's next. following me when I need the toilet?)#me and my sister are so bored we start throwing paper planes and fake fighting.#Which amuses the bored and the deaf#but of course my mum and aunt have opinions and this is not allowed. only soul crushing boredom allowed#they complain to each other over it while aggressively doing dishes#finally it ends because my mum and aunt start insisting my dad should go to bed if he's 'that tired'. *sprinkle on some additional ableism*#still sitting through a conversation about allergies one of my sister's friends has. my mum preaching that people should take that seriously#(meanwhile i had to cook for myself for 9 years because when my allergies were really bad no one bothered to check if i could eat something)#me and my sister go sit upstairs to discover our mum has made things we care about vanish in her room#and made things appear that should not be there#I've washed the interior of my car and hope the smell will go#you think it's over after that. but woke up with the realisation that even more things have disappeared from my sister's room.#i can't remember a time when things left outside of my room didn't disappear#I don't know why we do these family gatherings at all. no one has fun on days like that.#the housing crisis isn't making these things easy. my sister is losing her place to live again as well#she'll go hiking for a month and then work on a campsite over the summer#maybe I'll go house sitting again. idk.#can't make commitments a few months in advance like that because I'll cancel everything the second Sparks announces anything important
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Do you ever feel like you just stepped into a fairytale?
#I've never been this far north during the fall#the pacific northwest is gorgeous#this was a trip from hell but at least this hike was cool haha#photography#nature#nature photography#photographers on tumblr#landscape#forest#forest photography#travel#landscape photography#altart
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I live in a tightly packed area and sometimes, because there's a pond that sits right up against my and my neighbor's property, random men (and women, but I only mind when it's men) decide to plop down in my yard and start fishing for the bluegill. I'm still working on my confrontation skills (a combination of intense female socialization, liberal midwestern 'mind your own business and look the other way' mindset, and autism that makes it a struggle to look people in the face during even the most normal of occasions) but I have recently found that bringing my dog outside on her leash and letting her bark and growl at them while frantically tugging on the leash to get to them does a great job of making them suddenly, conveniently, want to move a few yards down, and I don't have to say a word during it. In fact, staring silently at them makes it work even better!
#for anyone who is concerned#my pup has very good leash manners when they're enforced#she comes with me in public fairly frequently and has no issues with behaving herself#at the vet#the park#pet stores#the local pride event every summer#and on hiking trails#she knows my cues very well#she and I just have a routine which is 'anyone in our yard who I don't greet is fair game to heckle'#I think it's not great to discourage her from expressing distrust towards men#and so long as she's in our yard and the person she's barking at is unfamiliar and not a child#I encourage her to indulge herself in being the big scary guard dog#she has a bite history with men but honestly I cannot say I think that's a bad thing#since the guy she bit ignored me telling him not to touch her#and tried tackling her (he was a complete stranger who wanted to 'help me get my dog back inside')#(she was off leash. she didn't leave the yard and was just taking a quick lap 😭)#honestly I've started rewarding her when she starts barking and growling at men after I show signs of discomfort#I tense up when I take her outside and there's some guy in our yard and she starts snarling and yanking on the leash?#hell yeah puppy let's get you some bacon fat
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